# Space Cadets



## akirajoel (Nov 24, 2005)

As much as I am loath to help plug forthcoming shows and shit. If I don't do it someone else will....

There have been shitty adverts for a new thing on Channel 4. Did some sniffing around and this is what I came up with:



> The Independent reports on a new reality TV show - in top secret production since March - that will trick nine clueless victims into thinking they've travelled into space. It'll be filmed live starting in December.
> "Issues that will be explained to them include the fact they will not be weightless in near space and that, like Sir Richard Branson's space-tourist shuttles, their craft will take off horizontally rather than vertically. A Russian fitness trainer will also take them through their physical paces.
> 
> The shuttle itself has been built using a set from the film Space Cowboys, starring Clint Eastwood, which was made from a Nasa blueprint. It consists of three sections - a cockpit, a mid-deck where they will they eat and sleep, and a laboratory, where the team will carry out experiments - some of them authentic, others slightly more wacky.
> ...




I just want to say again what I have said at length elsewhere: People are stupid. Don't even try to deny it.


----------



## Firky (Nov 24, 2005)

they're the same kind of people who get 'hypnotised' by the likes of paul mckenna. They're not thick, they're just susceptible brainless twats 

"Look Paul..... IM AN ALIEN"


----------



## DJ Squelch (Nov 24, 2005)

This programme is costing some ridiculous amount to make so what happens if the contestants twig that its all a hoax in the first episode?
I think the jokes on us.


----------



## Andy the Don (Nov 24, 2005)

Fucking ridiculous, the contestants will surely realise that they are still earth bound. They would notice the lack off acceleration & g's on take off. They may even notice that they are nowhere near any space project take-off area. They may even notice that in space there is supposed to be no atmosphere. But I think the clincher would be they could realise what a bunch of hapless muppets like them are doing anywhere near a space shuttle & the fact that most space explorers are either engineers, test pilots or scientists & not a hairdresser or such like from the West Midlands..


----------



## Stigmata (Nov 24, 2005)

The only way they can keep the contestants from rumbling this is if they're 'celebrities'. They're notoriously dense.


----------



## mtbskalover (Nov 24, 2005)

oh god, wat a crap sounding program, i cant stand reality tv and people who watch it

i've seen the trailers and hoped it would b a good new comedy, not like spoons, that was terrible, but something cool and funny

but oh no, more money waste in our great society.


----------



## Leon (Nov 24, 2005)

This is blatantly going to be a double-bluff - we're the one's going to be bluffed by a bunch of actors pretending to be gullible.


----------



## Donna Ferentes (Nov 24, 2005)

Yes, I think you may be right.


----------



## StuPC (Nov 25, 2005)

Andy the Don said:
			
		

> Fucking ridiculous, the contestants will surely realise that they are still earth bound. They would notice the lack off acceleration & g's on take off. They may even notice that they are nowhere near any space project take-off area. They may even notice that in space there is supposed to be no atmosphere. But I think the clincher would be they could realise what a bunch of hapless muppets like them are doing anywhere near a space shuttle & the fact that most space explorers are either engineers, test pilots or scientists & not a hairdresser or such like from the West Midlands..


Not if they're stupid enough to apply to be on a reality TV programme in the first place...


----------



## PacificOcean (Nov 25, 2005)

Aren't they going to notice that they are not getting into a space shuttle?


----------



## StuPC (Nov 25, 2005)

Not with Davina McCall shouting in their ear, and with their own pumped-up egos being stoked to bursting point by the prospect of being on TV.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 4, 2005)

On this wednesday...

Changed my mind. Think I may watch it now.........


----------



## YouSir (Dec 5, 2005)

Seems like a suprising amount of effort has been put into the illusion, saw Johnny Vaughan talking about it this morning, they've rigged up some abandoned air field with full Russian launch site facilities, right down to new plug sockets. Could well be a con of course, actors right the way through and I probably won't watch it, but I admire the attention to detail if nothing else.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 5, 2005)

I wonder how they're going to let them know? Or if they'll figure it out?

And I wonder if they're read the JG Ballard Short Story which kinda is about the same thing - but offers an interesting answer...........


----------



## subversplat (Dec 5, 2005)

Is this some kind of weird post-modern reality TV where it's actually all scripted? I hate telly


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 5, 2005)

subversplat said:
			
		

> Is this some kind of weird post-modern reality TV where it's actually all scripted? I hate telly



Probably not:




			
				northernprole said:
			
		

> sadly true. I was talking to a psychologist last week  who was asked to perform the screening for this show, having been a psychologist on high profile reality stuff before  and she refused - she felt it was unethical. well, at least we know its not a double bluff and the poor muppets taking part aren't all actors.


----------



## subversplat (Dec 5, 2005)

akirajoel said:
			
		

> Probably not:


That person is probably employed by the show to post on bulletin boards verifying its veracity.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 5, 2005)

subversplat said:
			
		

> That person is probably employed by the show to post on bulletin boards verifying its veracity.



Jesus. Someone's feeling cynical today huh?

Heh.


----------



## Good Intentions (Dec 5, 2005)

It's like a fucking Phillip K Dick book. Which is a great reason to give speed to everybody on camera.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 5, 2005)

Heh.

They could put it in their drinking water.


----------



## KeyboardJockey (Dec 5, 2005)

Andy the Don said:
			
		

> But I think the clincher would be they could realise what a bunch of hapless muppets like them are doing anywhere near a space shuttle & the fact that most space explorers are either engineers, test pilots or scientists & not a hairdresser or such like from the West Midlands..



Maybe they are in training for the 'B' Ark    along with the telephone sanitisers and advertising executives.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 5, 2005)

there was something in the paper about it this morning about how one of the actors that is in there to convince them that its all real has kept on getting his back story wrong thus possibly making the ' reality TV stars ' suspicious...... so the producers fired him


and it hasnt even started yet


----------



## May Kasahara (Dec 5, 2005)

My issue with this likely piece of shit is less with the presumed stupidity of the contestants and more with the fact that the programme makers obviously think that pointing fingers and laughing at people is the most hilarious thing in the world and that everyone should be encouraged to denigrate the thickos who think they're going into space. "Look! Aren't they stupid? Aren't we clever for seeing how stupid they are?" Honestly, as a fleeting ego boost it would be quicker and cheaper if they just sent everyone in their audience a gram of coke. Also some fucktard seems to have employed Johnny Vaughan, thus resurrecting his criminally pointless TV career and maintaining the illusion that he is in any way entertaining.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 5, 2005)

KeyboardJockey said:
			
		

> Maybe they are in training for the 'B' Ark    along with the telephone sanitisers and advertising executives.




heh.


----------



## wtfftw (Dec 5, 2005)

May Kasahara said:
			
		

> ... some fucktard seems to have employed Johnny Vaughan, thus resurrecting his criminally pointless TV career and maintaining the illusion that he is in any way entertaining.



That's my main problem with it. Really.


----------



## PacificOcean (Dec 5, 2005)

May Kasahara said:
			
		

> as a fleeting ego boost it would be quicker and cheaper if they just sent everyone in their audience a gram of coke.




The BBC should add this a policy for when it comes round to their charter renewal.  I will happily pay the licence fee!


----------



## Maggot (Dec 5, 2005)

So many people criticising a programme that hasn't even started yet!

This may well turn out to be rubbish, but it's bound to be much more interesting than Big Brother, X factor and I'm a Celebrity.


----------



## Dubversion (Dec 5, 2005)

May Kasahara said:
			
		

> My issue with this likely piece of shit is less with the presumed stupidity of the contestants and more with the fact that the programme makers obviously think that pointing fingers and laughing at people is the most hilarious thing in the world and that everyone should be encouraged to denigrate the thickos who think they're going into space. "Look! Aren't they stupid? Aren't we clever for seeing how stupid they are?"



for the sake of balance:

a) the article i read at the weekend was at pains to point out that imagination was the key, not stupidity, when it came to the various psychological tests they employed to assess those likely to go along with it.
b) most practical jokes, set-ups and pranks involve some element of laughing at people.


----------



## May Kasahara (Dec 6, 2005)

Indeed. I am very anti-practical jokes etc. because of this, mainly due to having been bullied a lot as a small child and having had long-lasting self-esteem issues as a result - there's a line between having a friendly piss-take and someone setting you up for a real let's-all-point-and-laugh session, and this prog seems firmly in the latter camp. Whether or not the participants _are_ stupid, the intention is to make them look and feel stupid by making the nation (or whatever % of it is watching) laugh at them.


----------



## Pigeon (Dec 6, 2005)

Personally, I think it would be far funnier if they kept Johnny Vaughan permanently locked in a mock-up of a TV studio.


----------



## zed66 (Dec 6, 2005)

Does it matter if the people involve object to their image being shown? I thought on a lot of programmes, especially public based practical joke programmes (Dom Joly etc) the people filmed had to sign a legal release.I understood that the standard practice was to use a physically attractive male/female reasearcher as appropriate to get the release form signed. 

I think the entire idea is way beyond unethical. The thought of the people smiling when a camera is shoved in their faces when the joke is revealed Noel Edmonds Gotcha stylee at the end. Ah, aren't they a good sport? Truly sick, but not in a funny way.


----------



## LJo (Dec 6, 2005)

I don't have a problem with most reality shows because the participants know what they're getting into. With this, they don't, and that's why I won't be watching. 

Also I read a piece by the guy who thought up the show in the Guardian at the weekend and he sounds like a smug, smartarse, shallow wanker.

And, of course, Johnny Vaughn.


----------



## blamblam (Dec 6, 2005)

I'm gonna watch this, just to see what happens. I mean it sounds pretty fucking interesting...


----------



## In Bloom (Dec 6, 2005)

God I hate reality TV.  Its all become so fucking cruel.

What is the entertainment value in nationally humiliating a buch of random stragers, anyway?


----------



## Onslow (Dec 6, 2005)

I think im the only one that likes Jonny Vaughn??

Think im just fond of his big breakfast days..


----------



## basher t (Dec 6, 2005)

I'm gonna reserve judgement untill I actually see the programme...


----------



## Dowie (Dec 6, 2005)

With shows like this even people who have read about it & are completely outraged/horrified by it will often still watch it just so they can get themselves even more outraged etc.. by it.

I'll definately be watching - it looks interesting and tbh... I'm not too concerned about the contestants - if you choose to put yourself forward for 'reality TV' shows then you are choosing to be potentially humiliated - how they act & respond to situations on the show is up to them.


----------



## zed66 (Dec 6, 2005)

I'll probably watch it for a cheap laugh, not actually offended by anything (within reason). The two things that I dislike are 1:the fact that someone somewhere actually thought this up ( I've got this idea......) 2:the Jeremy Beadle style payoff that will happen at the end. Guess I'll find out after I've watched it.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 7, 2005)

Its on tonight.


I know its bad and morally wrong and everything. But I think I'm gonna watch it.


----------



## Donna Ferentes (Dec 7, 2005)

The very thought of this programme makes me want to leave the planet.


----------



## Cloo (Dec 7, 2005)

I do find the idea quite funny, but I probably won't be arsed to watch, for the same reason I don't watch any of this reality stuff. Namely that I don't want to watch lots of dull, stupid people bickering. There's  enough of that in the world as it is.


----------



## Donna Ferentes (Dec 7, 2005)

Cloo said:
			
		

> Namely that I don't want to watch lots of dull, stupid people bickering.


So you came on to Urban75...


----------



## Bonfirelight (Dec 7, 2005)

i'm gonna watch it and love it. no matter how shit it is.


----------



## aqua (Dec 7, 2005)

we're watching it


----------



## nino_savatte (Dec 7, 2005)

Onslow said:
			
		

> I think im the only one that likes Jonny Vaughn??
> 
> Think im just fond of his big breakfast days..



I think you must be. See the Upper Class Twit of 2005 thread in General.


----------



## nino_savatte (Dec 7, 2005)

*I won't be watching this because....*

1. Johnny Vaughan is a twat and this another vehicle for his fuckwittery.
2. The contestants must be incredibly thick and were possibly selected because of their thickness.
3. Reality TV is becoming increasingly desperate: this represents the low water mark of the genre.


----------



## Dowie (Dec 7, 2005)

there is also still the possibility that one of the contestants rumbles the whole thing and makes channel 4 looks silly 

I'd love it if one of them goes 'hang on a minute thats just a feckin video screen' - unfortunately for them they will propably all end up humiliated tbh...


----------



## Giles (Dec 7, 2005)

Donna Ferentes said:
			
		

> The very thought of this programme makes me want to leave the planet.



Well, if you decide to do this, just make sure you get on a REAL spaceship.

Giles..


----------



## Chester Copperpot (Dec 7, 2005)

Won't the fact that no one is weightless give the game away a little


----------



## KeyboardJockey (Dec 7, 2005)

The Doctor said:
			
		

> Won't the fact that no one is weightless give the game away a little



That is what is concerning me.  Unless they spend the continuous time on a parabolic flight I can't see how they can get round this - unless the participants are so unknowlegable that they can't work out that space = weightlessness.


----------



## Agent Sparrow (Dec 7, 2005)

KeyboardJockey said:
			
		

> That is what is concerning me.  Unless they spend the continuous time on a parabolic flight I can't see how they can get round this - unless the participants are so unknowlegable that they can't work out that space = weightlessness.


I think its being explained as due to artificial gravitation.


----------



## Glosoli (Dec 7, 2005)

The Doctor said:
			
		

> Won't the fact that no one is weightless give the game away a little



modern flights have a gravity simulator so no-one floats around anymore anyhow. shame really! 

see http://www.guardian.co.uk/theguide/tvradio/story/0,14676,1655651,00.html?gusrc=rss


----------



## MysteryGuest (Dec 7, 2005)

It would appear that at least some of the "contestants" are prone to playing practical jokes IRL.  So serve them right frankly.


----------



## G. Fieendish (Dec 7, 2005)

Re:Contestant Gullibility
_They've been told the ship's spinning to simulate Gravity..... _


----------



## nino_savatte (Dec 7, 2005)

I think Paul McKenna should put in an appearance just for the sake of it.


----------



## Bonfirelight (Dec 7, 2005)

they should have one of the actors pretend to get sucked out into space at some point. It would be cool to see the contestants faces as they watch their pilot drift helplessly into infinity.


----------



## zed66 (Dec 7, 2005)

Bonfirelight said:
			
		

> they should have one of the actors pretend to get sucked out into space at some point. It would be cool to see the contestants faces as they watch their pilot drift helplessly into infinity.



 How about having one of the actors actually being a cyborg who is unknowingly infected with an alien, which is due to burst out of his chest at any....oh hang on.....


----------



## Maggot (Dec 7, 2005)

zed66 said:
			
		

> Does it matter if the people involve object to their image being shown? I thought on a lot of programmes, especially public based practical joke programmes (Dom Joly etc) the people filmed had to sign a legal release.I understood that the standard practice was to use a physically attractive male/female reasearcher as appropriate to get the release form signed.


These people have signed up to be on a reality show, of course they won't mind their image being shown.


As for gravity, the spaceships on Star Trek, Star wars, Aliens and almost any science fiction I cxan think of, all have gravity - so why shouldn't this craft?


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 7, 2005)

Maggot said:
			
		

> As for gravity, the spaceships on Star Trek, Star wars, Aliens and almost any science fiction I cxan think of, all have gravity - so why shouldn't this craft?



Science fiction.
Reality.

Discuss.


----------



## zed66 (Dec 7, 2005)

I can't wait to see the inside of the spaceship now. To get the authentic space feeling they should get a bloke dressed as a wookie sat in the corner growling over a hologamatic chessboard.


----------



## 8ball (Dec 7, 2005)

Surely it would be a lot cheaper to _really_ blast them into space.

It's not that expensive if you don't care about getting them down again.


----------



## Chester Copperpot (Dec 7, 2005)

Watched the first few minutes and have come to the conclusion they're taking the piss.


----------



## ATOMIC SUPLEX (Dec 7, 2005)

Wow this blows.


Update


.
.
..Boring

.
.
..Vaughn is indeed a cunt.


----------



## Chester Copperpot (Dec 7, 2005)

If these people really think they're going into space on channel 4's budget they truly are stupid.


----------



## DJ Squelch (Dec 7, 2005)

Even I recognise that "Charlie" actor bloke, he's  been on TV before somewhere. Wouldn't they get someone a little less obvious?


----------



## Lava (Dec 7, 2005)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Wow this blows.
> 
> 
> Update
> ...


 Yeah, that sums it up pretty well. I might switch to the last boy scout.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 7, 2005)

These people deserve everything they're gonna get.

Two of them are media students.


----------



## chio (Dec 7, 2005)

It was a pretty dull start and they're the usual reality-TV types. I'm away tomorrow night but I'll give it Friday before turning it off.


----------



## Rocket no.9 (Dec 7, 2005)

akirajoel said:
			
		

> These people deserve everything they're gonna get.
> 
> Two of them are media students.


Wot e said  - also to add...FOKKK-REH!!


----------



## Giles (Dec 7, 2005)

I think that the rest of this could be quite a laugh. 

I will be v interested to see how they convince them that they are actually getting aboard a space-ship, when they only have an old film-set of the _inside_ of the "craft".

Giles..


----------



## i_hate_beckham (Dec 8, 2005)

I have already fallen in love with Astrid.


----------



## Stobart Stopper (Dec 8, 2005)

I know where they filmed it, its the old Woodbridge USAF airbase. I know that place well.
It's also where the UFO incident happened in December 1980.


----------



## oooomegrapes (Dec 8, 2005)

i_hate_beckham said:
			
		

> I have already fallen in love with Astrid.


shes a mentalist........space cadet in every sense of the word


----------



## aqua (Dec 8, 2005)

I love the fact they asked for their families permission and they all said yes 

bees and I agreed we would have said go ahead if it was us two too


----------



## fen_boy (Dec 8, 2005)

Stobart Stopper said:
			
		

> I know where they filmed it, its the old Woodbridge USAF airbase. I know that place well.



My mum warned me about girls like you


----------



## Stobart Stopper (Dec 8, 2005)

LInk:

http://www.ianridpath.com/ufo/rendlesham1a.htm

I never believed it was a UFO, I reckon it was a captured Russian spy satellite, IMO they justmade up the UFO story to cover it up. Also, Woodbrdge was the place where most of the nukes were stored in the Cold War, not Greenham Common, as previously thought.


----------



## marty21 (Dec 8, 2005)

akirajoel said:
			
		

> Two of them are media students.



 


it's just so right to take the piss out of those two


----------



## i_hate_beckham (Dec 8, 2005)

oooomegrapes said:
			
		

> shes a mentalist........space cadet in every sense of the word


 I think thats why i love her.  

*Plans trip to Woodbridge to ask her out*


----------



## 1927 (Dec 8, 2005)

Cant understand why they didnt think,"rich space tourists pay $20million each to go into space and we're going for nothing,on Channel 4 budget", especially when JV actually mentioned rich space tourists to them!!


----------



## Maggot (Dec 8, 2005)

1927 said:
			
		

> Cant understand why they didnt think,"rich space tourists pay $20million each to go into space and we're going for nothing,on Channel 4 budget", especially when JV actually mentioned rich space tourists to them!!


But TV companies are loaded!

If I was a participant, the thing that would have me me suspicious, is why on earth was Steve picked to be in the final 12 when he was so completely useless.

This looks very interesting, will definitely be watching the rest.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 8, 2005)

watched last night , and will continue to do so , as its a nice diversion from life and just to see the look on these wannabes faces if they dont suss it out


----------



## hotvans (Dec 8, 2005)

a mate was on it for the first round of tests etc - thank god he didnt get through - he aint gullible enough tho.
I can't watch this again I felt bad for them despite them being thick as shite - I'm not being sizist but even the stupidest person would say hang on that large fella Steve is blatantly too fat to be an astronaut, when have you ever seen someone his size in space?


----------



## Crispy (Dec 8, 2005)

I didn't watch it, but flicked past it channel hopping, and saw some carboard cut-out russian military officer saying Velcom To Za Space Trainink Centorr - complete with shiny stare, gravelly voice, stubble and preaked cap. So obviously an actor. I guess they must have picked some really gullible people.


----------



## oooomegrapes (Dec 8, 2005)

ruffneck23 said:
			
		

> watched last night , and will continue to do so , as its a nice diversion from life and just to see the look on these wannabes faces if they dont suss it out



i think theyre gonna suss it out though.....if you think about it, its being broadcast for 5 days, youd think most of the airtime would be dedicated to the journey and training, so far theyve wasted one prog on hyping it up and showing the selection process, tonight is them arriving in 'russia', jv keeps banging on about 'if' they suss them out.....if they went all the way surely wed be seeing them pratting it up on 'outer space' at an early stage??

(i think i have too much time on my hands    )


----------



## Maggot (Dec 8, 2005)

oooomegrapes said:
			
		

> i think theyre gonna suss it out though.....if you think about it, its being broadcast for 5 days, youd think most of the airtime would be dedicated to the journey and training, so far theyve wasted one prog on hyping it up and showing the selection process, tonight is them arriving in 'russia', jv keeps banging on about 'if' they suss them out.....if they went all the way surely wed be seeing them pratting it up on 'outer space' at an early stage??


It's being broadcast for 10 days actually, and they're only gonna be in space for half that time.

Plus they've got Jamie's School Dinners lined up if they do suss it out.


----------



## oooomegrapes (Dec 8, 2005)

Maggot said:
			
		

> It's being broadcast for 10 days actually, and they're only gonna be in space for half that time.



well excuuuuuuuse me, bang goes my theory then!


----------



## aqua (Dec 8, 2005)

I wondered about Steve too tbh, but I suppose if you have a group of people who are easily led it would be easy enough to distract/lead them astray as to why he's there

I'll be watching again tonight  (it is tonight its on isn't it?)


----------



## aqua (Dec 8, 2005)

oooomegrapes said:
			
		

> well excuuuuuuuse me,



why? was that smell your arse again?


----------



## wtfftw (Dec 8, 2005)

aqua said:
			
		

> I love the fact they asked for their families permission and they all said yes
> 
> bees and I agreed we would have said go ahead if it was us two too



It didn't have to be family did it? It was the person they trusted most.
We utterly agreed there is no way we'd send each other on that show.

I liked the male actors. That poem was gold and then Steve complaining that he doesn't get paid enough.


----------



## aqua (Dec 8, 2005)

no someone you trusted you're right 

wouldn't have agreed though? why the hell not


----------



## wtfftw (Dec 8, 2005)

aqua said:
			
		

> no someone you trusted you're right
> 
> wouldn't have agreed though? why the hell not



Well, neither of us are the reality show type and if we do space it would have to be properly and together.   
The contestants are looking stupid, I just couldn't do that to the man I love.


----------



## aqua (Dec 8, 2005)

but if he'd applied already (which also would't actually apply to us cos we wouldn't BUT theoretically) then I wouldn't have said no  fair game to me


----------



## wtfftw (Dec 8, 2005)

aqua said:
			
		

> but if he'd applied already (which also would't actually apply to us cos we wouldn't BUT theoretically) then I wouldn't have said no  fair game to me


I guess he'd learn a valuable lesson. Or thoroughly enjoy it.


----------



## PacificOcean (Dec 8, 2005)

Anyone think that this is going to be a double bluff and it's us who are being hoaxed?

They all seem like actors to me and I just refuse to believe there are people who can be that stupid.


----------



## nino_savatte (Dec 8, 2005)

PacificOcean said:
			
		

> Anyone think that this is going to be a double bluff and it's us who are being hoaxed?
> 
> They all seem like actors to me and I just refuse to believe there are people who can be that stupid.



Good point. If that should be the case I suggest we march on C4, with flaming torches in our hands, a la_ Frankenstein_ 1930.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 8, 2005)

As far as I can tell it's a nothing but a show designed to take the piss out of spuid twats.

And as such, is bloody brilliant and to be encouraged.


----------



## lighterthief (Dec 8, 2005)

It the programme being transmitted 'live', as it were?  ie are the participants still on an airforce base near Ipswich as we speak?  Or is the whole thing over already?


----------



## Wookey (Dec 8, 2005)

> To get the authentic space feeling they should get a bloke dressed as a wookie sat in the corner growling over a hologamatic chessboard.



They asked, but I won't work with Johnny Vaughn again. Never.  

I think they should wait until they're doing the space flight simulation, and then secretly transport the simulator to somewhere like Trafalgar Square, and order them to disembark. With any luck you could actually break their brains in two.


----------



## Dubversion (Dec 8, 2005)

lighterthief said:
			
		

> It the programme being transmitted 'live', as it were?  ie are the participants still on an airforce base near Ipswich as we speak?  Or is the whole thing over already?




yeh, they've been in isolation till now, and from hereon in it's live. ish


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 8, 2005)

Not completely live - it goes through a compliance suite first.

(oops, didn't spot the ish)


----------



## 1927 (Dec 8, 2005)

I msut admit I did think that they might all be actors. Reason being when they were told they were going to be space tourists their recations didnt seem quite right. They all jumped up in the air straight away screaming about going into space,not one of them hesitated and thought,what the fuck!

If I had been there I would certainly have thought how were they gonna afford it,and befor ethat even would prob thought what are the implications of going into space. Noone asked JV what he meant they all just seemd to know straight away what they were gonna be doing and accepted it without thought.

I would have thought that out of twelve peeps that one of them would have been hesitant about going,but maybe thats what the weeding out procedure was about,they've got rid of anyone with an inquisitive brain or any intelligence whatsoever,coming to think about it of course it bloody was. Still very sceptical tho me!


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 8, 2005)

I'm surprised no one has mentioned this yet:


----------



## i_hate_beckham (Dec 8, 2005)

akirajoel said:
			
		

> I'm surprised no one has mentioned this yet:


 O.J.'s auto-biography??


----------



## chio (Dec 8, 2005)

The helicopter has a "G" registration for Britain. I'm no air geek, but even I can spot that!


----------



## Allan (Dec 8, 2005)

Of course they're all actors. The hoax is on us.


----------



## zed66 (Dec 8, 2005)

Well if they're not actors and they haven't actually twigged from the ham acting so far then these people must face very serious difficulties in their day to day existence. For their own safety I would suggest they have the following tattooed back to front on their forehead: Breathe, drink, eat, sleep.At least that way if they happen to pass a mirror they have an even chance of surviving. 

I'm not buying the fact (even given the pre-selection) that the entire group is thick as fucking mince. God help them if they aren't actors.


----------



## 1927 (Dec 8, 2005)

chio said:
			
		

> The helicopter has a "G" registration for Britain. I'm no air geek, but even I can spot that!



I spotted that would have given it away straight away,they gotta be actors!


----------



## 1927 (Dec 8, 2005)

I think that scottish guy they kept on the bus reminds me of the guy on Nighty Night.


----------



## Allan (Dec 8, 2005)

And how much jet lag would you have traveling that far? They haven't become suspicious that morning has come just when it should if they were still in England.


----------



## Rocket no.9 (Dec 8, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> And how much jet lag would you have traveling that far? They haven't become suspicious that morning has come just when it should if they were still in England.


...or that the 'squadron-leader' who left the RAF to live and work in Russia eight years ago greeted them in full dress uniform (and can't speak Russian).


----------



## happytobe... (Dec 8, 2005)

I missed this yesterday. Eee it makes you cringe.

  Everyone is saying how stupid they are not to notice anything but if you think about it..we all know so were bound to notice things or pick up on things that are not quite right. They haven't all set off there thinking 'right, this is all a hoax,what are the most obvious things around for me to prove this?"

Also, there bound to be thinking it's all a bit surreal anyway because well, in their minds they actually might be going to space and that's odd enough as it is.  If things don't seem real, then I guess they already feel like that. So it's not _that_ odd to them. If that makes sense.


----------



## Orangesanlemons (Dec 8, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> Of course they're all actors. The hoax is on us.



That's the theory I started off with. The thing is, after two episodes of this you would have thought someone on the usual sites would have recognised them as actors - you know, "I went to drama school with so and so". In the internet age I think that keeping that knowledge secret would be harder than persauding a group of isolated reality show-wannabies that they've been to space camp in Russia and been blasted into orbit.

So I'm slowly coming round to the idea that - to quote Zed66 - the entire group is as thick as mince.


----------



## 1927 (Dec 8, 2005)

Orangesanlemons said:
			
		

> That's the theory I started off with. The thing is, after two episodes of this you would have thought someone on the usual sites would have recognised them as actors - you know, "I went to drama school with so and so". In the internet age I think that keeping that knowledge secret would be harder than persauding a group of isolated reality show-wannabies that they've been to space camp in Russia and been blasted into orbit.
> 
> So I'm slowly coming round to the idea that - to quote Zed66 - the entire group is as thick as mince.




Scottish guy with frizzy hair in advert!


----------



## Orangesanlemons (Dec 8, 2005)

Aha! One down, eight to go.


----------



## happytobe... (Dec 8, 2005)

1927 said:
			
		

> Scottish guy with frizzy hair in advert!



 
...
ok ok you were all right


----------



## Giles (Dec 8, 2005)

What did fuzzy Scottish bloke claim to be as a job, though?

Appearing in a blood transfusion thingie isn't all that much, though, is it?

I'm still not sure....

Giles..


----------



## oooomegrapes (Dec 8, 2005)

1927 said:
			
		

> Scottish guy with frizzy hair in advert!


fuck me!!! now who are the gullible ones!!! boo, what a spoiler


----------



## oooomegrapes (Dec 8, 2005)

Giles said:
			
		

> What did fuzzy Scottish bloke claim to be as a job, though?
> 
> Appearing in a blood transfusion thingie isn't all that much, though, is it?
> 
> ...


actually......if my memory serves me right he said he was a lab technician, so a little bit tenous but possibly related??


----------



## 1927 (Dec 8, 2005)

oooomegrapes said:
			
		

> actually......if my memory serves me right he said he was a lab technician, so a little bit tenous but possibly related??



Electrician


----------



## happytobe... (Dec 8, 2005)

Giles said:
			
		

> What did fuzzy Scottish bloke claim to be as a job, though?
> 
> Appearing in a blood transfusion thingie isn't all that much, though, is it?
> 
> ...


yeah I guess, he could have been doing it for a bit of extra cash...well if any of the others are found then we know the joke's on us.


----------



## 1927 (Dec 8, 2005)

happytobe... said:
			
		

> yeah I guess, he could have been doing it for a bit of extra cash...well if any of the others are found then we know the joke's on us.



Its hardly on us if we sus it tho!


----------



## LilMissHissyFit (Dec 8, 2005)

I was watching richard and judy earlier   I know I know- desperate!  

The Telly critic they had on said there are a few actors in there to keep the whole thing going, in case anyone says 'this is a wind up' they have to persuade them ( or the rest of the group) that they are conspiracy therorists gone loopy and of course its not a wind up  

which would explain loopy haired blood transfusion guy's presence.Apparently on something one actor muttered 'I never knew it would be this hard- I demand to speak with my agent


----------



## happytobe... (Dec 8, 2005)

1927 said:
			
		

> Its hardly on us if we sus it tho!


yeah I thought that as i was typing it.  But in terms of 'us' being the people who are watching it the joke would be on 'us' but not...erm....us.


----------



## Giles (Dec 8, 2005)

LilMissHissyFit said:
			
		

> I was watching richard and judy earlier   I know I know- desperate!
> 
> The Telly critic they had on said there are a few actors in there to keep the whole thing going, in case anyone says 'this is a wind up' they have to persuade them ( or the rest of the group) that they are conspiracy therorists gone loopy and of course its not a wind up
> 
> which would explain loopy haired blood transfusion guy's presence.Apparently on something one actor muttered 'I never knew it would be this hard- I demand to speak with my agent



No, don't think so. The three actors have we have been clearly told about already, and he is not one of them.

Giles..


----------



## happytobe... (Dec 8, 2005)

LilMissHissyFit said:
			
		

> which would explain loopy haired blood transfusion guy's presence.


Haven't they told us who the actors are though? And he isn't one that we've been told about. Is he? I don't think he is.


----------



## psykoptic (Dec 8, 2005)

I missed it tonight and only watched the arse end of last night by accident. I really really hope the "hopefuls" are genine. I can' want to see the look on their faces when they realise that their acting/singing/modelling career is a pile of pish and the entire country has been laughing at them.

Johnny V asked one trusted friend/family member of each contestant "do you might if we take the piss out of your best mate/wife/husband"? And they said _yes_??!!?

Excellent! I hope the whole thing ends in tears. Its going to be a hell of a lot better than watching Ant and Deck turning up half cut in Oz forcing Z-listers to eat bugs.


----------



## CyberRose (Dec 8, 2005)

http://www.performersdirectory.co.uk/extrasgirls.html

Found this on DS forums bout one of the contestants called Keri. A lot of them seem to have recognised her from being on the telly before (on another reality program)


----------



## Rocket no.9 (Dec 8, 2005)

*Another one bites the dust...*

Keri the "college administrator"...and wannabe actress.
http://www.performersdirectory.co.uk/extrasgirls.html

...two mins too slow on that one!


----------



## oooomegrapes (Dec 8, 2005)

Rocket no.9 said:
			
		

> Keri the "college administrator"...and wannabe actress.
> http://www.performersdirectory.co.uk/extrasgirls.html
> 
> ...two mins too slow on that one!


the girl in the middle at the top........naomi campbell??? shes let herself go a bit hasnt she?


----------



## psykoptic (Dec 8, 2005)

oh, hang on though.

This happened on some other reality TV show (no idea which one, they are all preditable crap until this came along)

I'm sure on the other programme contestants were accused of being actors - in reality [sic] they were just wannabes who had cut-rate agents. The agents got them on the show (Big Brother or whatever it was) Take a look at the website above (performersdirectory.co.uk/) in more detail - the image links at the bottom are broken, hardly a pro agency for placing stools on a C4 "reality" TV show, more like a tenner and take them off our hands.

So they might not all be actors, just wannabe assholes. All the better for getting made a fool of.


----------



## zed66 (Dec 9, 2005)

psykoptic said:
			
		

> So they might not all be actors, just wannabe assholes. All the better for getting made a fool of.



That would explain why frizzy hair guy didn't even bother getting a hair cut, why Keri Hassett uses her real name. Unless of course it's a double double bluff?








Edit:Irrelevant link removed.


----------



## Moggy (Dec 9, 2005)

zed66 said:
			
		

> That would explain why frizzy hair guy didn't even bother getting a hair cut, why Keri Hassett uses her real name and why a quick google for Sarah Jane Cass brings up...
> 
> Another coincidence?



Yeah, but we already know she's a media student


----------



## zed66 (Dec 9, 2005)

Moggy said:
			
		

> Yeah, but we already know she's a media student


You're too quick- realised it myself and removed link!


----------



## i_hate_beckham (Dec 9, 2005)

I'm going to banging on about this conspiracy all night down the pub tomorrow!


----------



## i_hate_beckham (Dec 9, 2005)

Keri Hasslet was also on Cruel Summer on the sky channel Trouble.


----------



## London_Calling (Dec 9, 2005)

Chris Morris ?


----------



## Allan (Dec 9, 2005)

Is it reasonable that a Russian space agency would have a title and acronym that makes sense only in Englush? (S.T.A.R.) Is this another slip-up?


----------



## liberty (Dec 9, 2005)

Another Big Brother spin off... I will be giving it a miss but Oic seems hooked


----------



## Juice Terry (Dec 9, 2005)

and the jokes on you....

Maybe they have Derren Brown working on their brains behind the scenes?

If by some miracle this is not a scam on the audience by far the best way to end it would be to engineer some sort of an emergency landing on a deserted beach somewhere and let them stumble around a bit until they discover half the staue of Liberty buried in the sand....


----------



## Bonfirelight (Dec 9, 2005)

Juice Terry said:
			
		

> and the jokes on you....
> 
> Maybe they have Derren Brown working on their brains behind the scenes?
> 
> If by some miracle this is not a scam on the audience by far the best way to end it would be to engineer some sort of an emergency landing on a deserted beach somewhere and let them stumble around a bit until they discover half the staue of Liberty buried in the sand....



 
i think once they're up there at some point they should have a klingon battlecruiser decloak out the starboard window.


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 9, 2005)

I don't think it's a hoax on us - I can see them editing it if I walk down the corridor from where I'm sat now and I don't see any actors being fed lines or anything - just stupid gullible fools squealing with excitement. They could be fooling me though too!


----------



## PacificOcean (Dec 9, 2005)

Orang Utan said:
			
		

> They could be fooling me though too!



Wouldn't be too hard would it?


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 9, 2005)

PacificOcean said:
			
		

> Wouldn't be too hard would it?



Arranging a fake edit suite would perhaps be going a little bit too far!


----------



## nino_savatte (Dec 9, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> Is it reasonable that a Russian space agency would have a title and acronym that makes sense only in Englush? (S.T.A.R.) Is this another slip-up?



What about the Latin script on the side of the helicopter (I said I wasn't going to watch this but you know what it's like with car crashes: you just can't help yourself)? It should have been in Cyrillic.


----------



## aqua (Dec 9, 2005)

or they keep being told they'll be astronauts

which they wouldn't if they were in russia, they'd be cosmonauts


----------



## chintz (Dec 9, 2005)

aqua said:
			
		

> or they keep being told they'll be astronauts
> 
> which they wouldn't if they were in russia, they'd be cosmonauts



I thought that but you are only a cosmonaut if you are Russian apparently.


----------



## wtfftw (Dec 9, 2005)

the sattelite show is a pile of crap. They did have someone ring in suggesting they were all actors and the joke is on the audience. Perhaps that is another part of the elaborate plan?

I think it's wholly likely that celeb wannabes who would go on this show would have been in adverts etc.


----------



## aqua (Dec 9, 2005)

chintz said:
			
		

> I thought that but you are only a cosmonaut if you are Russian apparently.




really? I thought it was were you undertook your training?

I could easily be wrong though


----------



## chintz (Dec 9, 2005)

aqua said:
			
		

> really? I thought it was were you undertook your training?
> 
> I could easily be wrong though



to be fair I could just as easily be wrong, I  often am.


----------



## boing! (Dec 9, 2005)

I havn't actually seen this program so I know I can't really comment but I really think people on here are giving these people too much credit. There are some _really_ stupid people out there remember.  

I reckon there must be loads of wannabe actors apply to be in reality tv programs, many people see it as a spring board into a career.


----------



## Glosoli (Dec 9, 2005)

boing! said:
			
		

> I havn't actually seen this program so I know I can't really comment but I really think people on here are giving these people too much credit. There are some _really_ stupid people out there remember.
> 
> I reckon there must be loads of wannabe actors apply to be in reality tv programs, many people see it as a spring board into a career.




What e said... except i _have_ watched it!


----------



## WombleGCS15 (Dec 9, 2005)

Best quotes so far . . . . 


'Going to space - it's like a ride at Chessington x 10,000'   oh dear !!!  


And from the frizzee'd hair one - 'I'm never going to have to buy a drink again!' (when he realises he may be the 1st British tourist in space. )



And can anyone else see when this thing is done, the Z-listers appearing
on R&J (shudders) or interviewed in Heat (or such other quality journo rag)
stating - 'yeah thought there was something up, but didn't like to say !!!'  

Yeah Right !    


WombleGCS15


----------



## belboid (Dec 9, 2005)

Orang Utan said:
			
		

> I don't think it's a hoax on us - I can see them editing it if I walk down the corridor from where I'm sat now and I don't see any actors being fed lines or anything - just stupid gullible fools squealing with excitement. They could be fooling me though too!


well, they'd still have to edit it wouldn't they.  And if they are _all_ actors, they wouldn't need to be fed lines as they'd already learnt them!

Thus, the fact that one of the acknowledged actors last night supposedly made a cock up and got to into role and asked a tricky question of the 'scientist', provides added veracity.


----------



## lostexpectation (Dec 9, 2005)

*near space cadets*

well didn't somebody say yesterday that it would be bolox if it were only near space they were going to instead of actual space?

I mean they did explain that it would take 12 months for you to train for mission similar to how that millionaire went up for a couple of days, but if your going pull a hoax why not make it the full monty...

they said it will be similar to the space plane projects which afaik only skim space and last minutes, they said it would be plane not a rocket so I can imagine them going to the runway (where instead of taking off plane-like) they taxi with the windows shut to the warehouse with the digital effects screen... and pretend to take off...not "launch"


----------



## Allan (Dec 9, 2005)

The stuff we've seen so far is obviously recorded from a few weeks ago but what's happening right now? Where are they right now? Has the whole thing finished? At what point do we get "live" stuff?


----------



## happytobe... (Dec 9, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> The stuff we've seen so far is obviously recorded from a few weeks ago but what's happening right now? Where are they right now? Has the whole thing finished? At what point do we get "live" stuff?


It is pretty much now.  Go back a couple of pages, someone said so earlier.


----------



## CyberRose (Dec 9, 2005)

Juice Terry said:
			
		

> and the jokes on you....
> 
> Maybe they have Derren Brown working on their brains behind the scenes?
> 
> If by some miracle this is not a scam on the audience by far the best way to end it would be to engineer some sort of an emergency landing on a deserted beach somewhere and let them stumble around a bit until they discover half the staue of Liberty buried in the sand....


Nah series 2 of Lost aint out yet...


----------



## chio (Dec 9, 2005)

How many times does Johnny Vaughan say the same thing in every episode?

We KNOW it's in Ipswich! And we KNOW you've got Jamie's School Dinners as "backup" in case they figure it out. Now go and write a NEW script.


----------



## belboid (Dec 9, 2005)

in case they figure it out?  what, figure out every single person in it is an actor?

it's bloody obvious after this tosh - not a chortle at the idiotic acronyms?  gimme a break. it could be cancelled cos we've all sussed it.


----------



## happytobe... (Dec 9, 2005)

wasn't that good today was it. Hmm, I wonder if they are all actors.


----------



## Glosoli (Dec 9, 2005)

i'm beginning not to care. it's like a bad film where you still want to find out how it ends even though it may kill you!


----------



## Stobart Stopper (Dec 9, 2005)

You know what I think? They are ALL actors. It's the viewers who are being duped, and I suspect that they will reveal all on the last day. It's a conspiracy.


----------



## chio (Dec 9, 2005)

Glosoli said:
			
		

> i'm beginning not to care. it's like a bad film where you still want to find out how it ends even though it may kill you!



Agreed. How long's it got to go on for _every night_ before we finally find out? Might miss the rest and tune in for the last one!


----------



## Stobart Stopper (Dec 9, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> The stuff we've seen so far is obviously recorded from a few weeks ago but what's happening right now? Where are they right now? Has the whole thing finished? At what point do we get "live" stuff?


They have gone, according to an American friend of mine who is at this very moment staying at a B & B only a mile or so away from the old airbase. It is in fact the old Bentwaters airbase, not Woodbridge as I said before. Woodbridge is now being used again by the military.
Bentwaters is all under private ownership and this is where they filmed it, but it's all finished.


----------



## bmd (Dec 10, 2005)

chio said:
			
		

> Agreed. How long's it got to go on for _every night_ before we finally find out? Might miss the rest and tune in for the last one!



After watching it tonight with that interminable part with the pictures I don't even want to know, how unfunny was that, it's like Johnny Vaughn wrote the script. Bloke holds picture up, person describes it aaaaaaaaaaand...that's it. Ho fucking ho.


----------



## ddraig (Dec 10, 2005)

Stobart Stopper said:
			
		

> You know what I think? They are ALL actors. It's the viewers who are being duped, and I suspect that they will reveal all on the last day. It's a conspiracy.


i haven't seen any of it but just thought i'd share this from another site with you



> Right, you know this sapce cadet mallarkey yeh, the guy with the fluffy hair, the scotmans, know the one i mean yeh!
> 
> ok
> 
> ...

















what say u who've been watching it?


----------



## Stobart Stopper (Dec 10, 2005)

I'd say that it's definitely him, unless he has a twin brother.


----------



## ddraig (Dec 10, 2005)

sorry, just actually skimmed the thread and seen 1927's post


----------



## Grandma Death (Dec 10, 2005)

Perhaps its a bit part actor that landed a place on the show. I mean didn't Big Brother have someone who was a bit part actor in it previously???


----------



## Allan (Dec 10, 2005)

That's not an acting job, more of an extra's job which any idiot can do. This proves nothing.


----------



## belboid (Dec 10, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> That's not an acting job, more of an extra's job which any idiot can do. This proves nothing.


fer fucks sake, are you being paid by channel 4?  or are you just exceptionally gullible?


THEY ARE ALL FUCKING ACTORS - IT'S A PISSPOOR CON


----------



## Stigmata (Dec 10, 2005)

Maybe he really did give blood to Gordon Ramsay.


----------



## WouldBe (Dec 10, 2005)

belboid said:
			
		

> fer fucks sake, are you being paid by channel 4?  or are you just exceptionally gullible?
> 
> 
> THEY ARE ALL FUCKING ACTORS - IT'S A PISSPOOR CON



You mean like when me and work colleagues, all of who had never done any acting or even set foot inside an acting school, were asked to be *extras* in a film.

All you had to do was turn up, put on your outfit and mill about.


----------



## pogofish (Dec 10, 2005)

Stobart Stopper said:
			
		

> I know where they filmed it, its the old Woodbridge USAF airbase. I know that place well.



Is it Woodbridge?  Because the aerial photo & bunker they showed, looked much more like the nearby RAF Bentwaters?  The runway design & layout is totally different for a start, Woodbridge has one of the most distinctive runways in the UK - one of only three bases designed to land any known aircraft type (particularly Soviet heavy bombers) in case of emergency/capture/defection etc & is longer & three times wider than any other airfield in the south of the country.

Bunker:
http://www.bunkertours.co.uk/milhist2/bentwaters9.jpg

Map:
http://www.bunkertours.co.uk/milhist2/OS_Map.GIF

Tour of Bentwaters:
http://www.bunkertours.co.uk/milhist2/raf_bentwaters.htm

They had quite a few sites for cold-war nuke storage, including a couple more in that area, unconnected with any single airbase.  But my anorak is zipped-up tightly-enough for today!  


Edit - Just caught-up to your later post, sorry.


----------



## belboid (Dec 10, 2005)

WouldBe said:
			
		

> You mean like when me and work colleagues, all of who had never done any acting or even set foot inside an acting school, were asked to be *extras* in a film.
> 
> All you had to do was turn up, put on your outfit and mill about.


yeah, exactly like that.

fucking hell, its a bit of a conicidence isnt it?  and more bloody actors - ie people with actual lines! - in there as well?


----------



## Maggot (Dec 10, 2005)

belboid said:
			
		

> fer fucks sake, are you being paid by channel 4?  or are you just exceptionally gullible?
> 
> 
> THEY ARE ALL FUCKING ACTORS - IT'S A PISSPOOR CON


Are you just exceptionally cynical? 

Some of them have had their profession listed as actors, so it's not surprising they've popped up elsewhere.


----------



## Lost Zoot (Dec 10, 2005)

meh wheather they're actors or not...i dont like anything which looks like it's trying to pass of humiliation as entertainment. That's abit sick. and not in and hiphop kid kind of way.


----------



## bristol_citizen (Dec 10, 2005)

belboid said:
			
		

> fer fucks sake, are you being paid by channel 4?  or are you just exceptionally gullible?
> 
> 
> THEY ARE ALL FUCKING ACTORS - IT'S A PISSPOOR CON


The Bristolian - Paul - is not an actor. He's a plasterer. Fact.


----------



## Maggot (Dec 10, 2005)

Lost Zoot said:
			
		

> meh wheather they're actors or not...i dont like anything which looks like it's trying to pass of humiliation as entertainment. That's abit sick. and not in and hiphop kid kind of way.



They volunteered to be on areality show, so they deserve it.
The programme makers told the people who were close to the participants it was a scam and asked them if it was ok to go ahead. Every single one said yes.


----------



## Lost Zoot (Dec 10, 2005)

dont "a" and "b" me.   I dont fucking care, Revelling in someone's humiliation is...wrong.


----------



## Maggot (Dec 10, 2005)

Lost Zoot said:
			
		

> dont "a" and "b" me.   I dont fucking care, Revelling in someone's humiliation is...wrong.


 If you have never laughed at someone's humiliation then you have no sense of humour.


----------



## Allan (Dec 10, 2005)

The actors are in on it. They're plants - moles - assigned to infiltrate the group and step in to a conversation if anyone gets suspicious, to further convince them from inside the group that it's all genuine.


----------



## lostexpectation (Dec 11, 2005)

*your all still watching arn't ya!*

the thing is several of them particularily keri have said, this is a pisstake there are just seeing how we reacting, they all said it out loud but one responded they are going along for the fun, how would they stop the hoax?  they could stand up and shout it and accuse the tutors of being actors but they'd just deny and keep going...??

the only sure way would be if they figured out they were in England.

and that soundeffects  guy bloody said it today he mumbled about 2001 being shot there, he said "it was all shot in England in the Brentwood base here"

but he mumbled and they ignored it and he mentioned there supposed EVA aswell.  

How exactly do they cal hoax?


----------



## WouldBe (Dec 11, 2005)

bristol_citizen said:
			
		

> The Bristolian - Paul - is not an actor. He's a plasterer. Fact.



Perhaps Belboid should have gone in for it. Seems to have the right aptitude.


----------



## WouldBe (Dec 11, 2005)

lostexpectation said:
			
		

> and that soundeffects  guy bloody said it today he mumbled about 2001 being shot there, he said "it was all shot in England in the Brentwood base here"
> 
> but he mumbled and they ignored it and he mentioned there supposed EVA aswell.



He claimed 2001 was shot in Hollywood and was corrected by one of the other 'tutors' who said it was filmed at pinewood in England.

It was then he mumbled Oh yes it was filmed here.

He also told them about the suprise party as well.


----------



## WouldBe (Dec 11, 2005)

Which ever gullible fool on here thought the 'contestants' should be fooled by S.T.A.R. ought to look at this. 

Star City is the name of the russian cosmonaut training facility.


----------



## wtfftw (Dec 11, 2005)

I've only watched the first one thus far (been outdoors and am dedicated to other programmes innit). Are they actually showing more of the contestants now? I don't want to just see Vaughan backslapping himself.


----------



## ATOMIC SUPLEX (Dec 11, 2005)

This is only the second one I have seen but it's still total shit.

They are only doing exersises and stuff, who cares????
It's only going to be interesting when they 'take off'. 

Boring boring boring.

And the idea of hoodwinking them all is really mean spirted anyway. Is this the way TV should be going.

Fuck off endermol, I bet it's you who made this shit isn't it.




PS
Vaughn is such a total cunt, worse than he has ever been. Coke filled self important cunt.


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 11, 2005)

*My Good Idea:*

They should engineer a double-bluff on the audience by sending them all into space for real.

Heh.


----------



## In Bloom (Dec 11, 2005)

Maggot said:
			
		

> If you have never laughed at someone's humiliation then you have no sense of humour.


Can't you see the difference between say, taking the piss out of a mate in the pub and humiliating a group of random strangers on national television in a way that may potentially leave them psychologically scarred for life?


----------



## i_hate_beckham (Dec 11, 2005)

In Bloom said:
			
		

> Can't you see the difference between say, taking the piss out of a mate in the pub and humiliating a group of random strangers on national television in a way that may potentially leave them psychologically scarred for life?


 But its not real though.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 11, 2005)

belboid said:
			
		

> fer fucks sake, are you being paid by channel 4?  or are you just exceptionally gullible?
> 
> 
> THEY ARE ALL FUCKING ACTORS - IT'S A PISSPOOR CON


No they aren't, and no it's not.


----------



## nino_savatte (Dec 12, 2005)

Cosmonauts and Astronauts don't consume loads of alcohol before going into space nor do they do silly stretching exercises that are loosely based on theatre warm up exercises. 

What a load of gullible fuckers.


----------



## Allan (Dec 12, 2005)

Artifical gravity generators????

Gullible indeed.


----------



## Donna Ferentes (Dec 12, 2005)

My sympathy is with belboid here.

It wouldn't be the first time that a "reality TV" show, which has purported to show a group of actual people being conned by somebody else, has actually been a con _itself_ in which the viewers have been the _only_ people not in on it.


----------



## nino_savatte (Dec 12, 2005)

Is anyone getting that Orson Welles feeling?


----------



## boing! (Dec 12, 2005)

Having actually watched a bit of it last night, I can see why people might think they are actors. There does seem something not quite right with the way people are behaving. 
The main thing that stuck out though is that it is infact incredibly dull tv.


----------



## editor (Dec 13, 2005)

I watched a bit of it tonight for the first time when they were supposed to be going into space.

It was like watching a bunch of thick, giggling schoolchildren on a trip to the zoo or something.

The whole thing seems highly suspect. _If _it is for real and the people really were so indescribably stupid as to be fooled by the cobbled together yarn, then surely they'd end up absolutely crushed and humiliated - especially as the whole set up is so utterly unconvincing.

And if it's just a bunch of unconvincing actors playing along for cheap TV thrills (which is what it appears to be), then it's an even bigger waste of time.

Dreadful, dull TV.


----------



## METH LAB (Dec 13, 2005)

But u still watch it dont ya.. 

lol, its johnnny vaugn that does me, everynow and then he comes out with some crap which makes me piss meself, so that will do, brainless enternteainment but at least it aint home alone 2.

peace


----------



## editor (Dec 13, 2005)

METH LAB said:
			
		

> But u still watch it dont ya..


Nah. I stuck it for 15 mins for the first time just to see how they were going to fake the lift off and it was so badly done - and the actors/gullible participants so immensely irritating - I rapidly lost all interest


----------



## lostexpectation (Dec 13, 2005)

*they're just playing along ?*

I have been watching it (but don't tell endemol), and reading various boards :/ 

Tonight Keri to Paul said "I don't believe it, I don't believe it at all", and he looked at her and said "Well you have to don't ya".

thats they're attitude, they wanna win a prize of something so they've all agreed  that its fake and they're just playing along. 

It bizarre how boring it is, why havn't they shown anybody a diagram of shuttle and mission path. 

Most of the talk on the C4 boards is centred around it being fake.Although this is interesting, know anything about this Juno mission and an actual space flight programme with ITV which ended with Helen Sharpham going up.
http://community.channel4.com/groupee/forums/a/tpc/f/3490031163/m/5830057563

So tonight we finally got to see the launch, it was very underwhelming, they could have turned the volume up for us too, the, the pilots seem so casual. 

Im not sure if it was live but why didn't they arranged to show us the moment they first looked out the window towards earth and went oh look down there!! It's beautiful, I can see my house! that would have been a television moment, but they didn't show it??

I watched some of the live show and it incredibly boring, there chatting with the pilots fiddling with stuff.???


----------



## METH LAB (Dec 13, 2005)

Cant say ive been followin it meself... do like johnny vaughn though, dangerous i know its just everynow and then he drops that funny shit which aint even funny but seems to be... from big brekkie to actors on mars or whatever it is, the reason i watch is for the host lol. 

(only watch it if its on like and im in tele room by accidant... honest! lol)

peace


----------



## e-fluent (Dec 13, 2005)

I see they really pulled off the duping them into thinking they are in zero gravity trick.


----------



## TeeJay (Dec 13, 2005)

METH LAB said:
			
		

> But u still watch it dont ya..


No. I haven't even been tempted to watch *any* of it.


----------



## tendril (Dec 13, 2005)

lostexpectation said:
			
		

> Im not sure if it was live but why didn't they arranged to show us the moment they first looked out the window towards earth and went oh look down there!! It's beautiful, I can see my house! that would have been a television moment, but they didn't show it??



Apparently there was a moth in the warehouse and it would have been a shadow in their illusion.


----------



## Allan (Dec 13, 2005)

e-fluent said:
			
		

> I see they really pulled off the duping them into thinking they are in zero gravity trick.



You really haven't been watching, have you?

The lectures they had were in part designed to lower their expectations of what it would be likei in space including lack of zero gravity. They would be in a low orbit so still be affected by gravity and there are also artificial gravity generators in the flooring. The reason for that being that they don't have the months it would take to train them for a zero-G environment.

So there.   


But now that the training is all over we've got 5 days of watching 6 people in  a box. You can even watch it live on E4 if you like. What audience figures they had will drop as people are now only waiting for the denouement.


----------



## belboid (Dec 13, 2005)

WouldBe said:
			
		

> Perhaps Belboid should have gone in for it. Seems to have the right aptitude.


you _really_ don't understand the supposed premise of the programme do you.


----------



## TeeJay (Dec 13, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> ...there are also artificial gravity generators in the flooring...


WTF? What kind of idiots think that "artificial gravity generators" exist?


----------



## Bonfirelight (Dec 13, 2005)

i wanted to enjoy this, but i missed most of it. I caught last nights however, but can't say i was impressed.
by the look of it you'll feel more G's on the magic teacups at thorpe park.


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 13, 2005)

TeeJay said:
			
		

> WTF? What kind of idiots think that "artificial gravity generators" exist?



Loads of people! Not everyone reads New Scientist and knows science from moveie science.


----------



## Juice Terry (Dec 13, 2005)

Bonfirelight said:
			
		

> i wanted to enjoy this, but i missed most of it. I caught last nights however, but can't say i was impressed.
> by the look of it you'll feel more G's on the magic teacups at thorpe park.


Seeing as they never moved, the sum total of G they could possible feel would be 1. I just can't believe these people are too thick to realise, I mean they must have all at least gone on hols to Tenerife in an aeroplane in the past so must have some idea what forces are necessary to get a great big metal airplane/shuttle off the ground, let alone into orbit.

TOTAL SCAM!


----------



## TeeJay (Dec 13, 2005)

Orang Utan said:
			
		

> Loads of people! Not everyone reads New Scientist and knows science from moveie science.


I thought that science was a compulsory subject at school up to 16? You don't need to read New Scientist to have a basic grasp of science - its the kind of thing that people have arguments about in the pub. The idea that you could get 10 (or however many?) people who would all believe this shit without question is either bollocks or a very sad comment or how ignorant and stupid people are. It baffles me why so many people in the UK keep laughing at "stupid yanks" when this country seems to be able to produce limitless numbers of utter fuckwits (and plenty of utterly shite TV). 

I don't suppose you feel any loyalty to Channel 4 do you Orang Utan?


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 13, 2005)

TeeJay said:
			
		

> I thought that science was a compulsory subject at school up to 16? You don't need to read New Scientist to have a basic grasp of science - its the kind of thing that people have arguments about in the pub. The idea that you could get 10 (or however many?) people who would all believe this shit without question is either bollocks or a very sad comment or how ignorant and stupid people are. It baffles me why so many people in the UK keep laughing at "stupid yanks" when this country seems to be able to produce limitless numbers of utter fuckwits (and plenty of utterly shite TV).
> 
> I don't suppose you feel any loyalty to Channel 4 do you Orang Utan?


Not at all, I just like getting mired down in pointless arguments. 
Before today, I would not have been able to confirm or deny 100% the existence of anti-gravity devices. That is a matter of ignorance, not stupidity.
Likewise, I also did not know about the oil refinery explosion til yesterday morning. I had not watched the telly or picked up a newspaper. That again makes me ignorant. Not thick.


----------



## zoltan (Dec 13, 2005)

Its reality TV eating itself. The whole lazy, uncreative , mindless Genetically modified Reality TV movement has disappeaerd up its own arse.

I have been waiting for this for such a long time.


----------



## DexterTCN (Dec 13, 2005)

I'm not watching it.  I refuse to.

I'm not sitting to watch some multi-national TV station rip the piss out of a bunch of wannabees just so they can sell me a fucking Sony walkman during the adverts.

They can fuck off - do you hear?  Fuck...right...off. 

To fuck.


----------



## ATOMIC SUPLEX (Dec 13, 2005)

My third ep, the tv has gone off. 


This is soooo boring.


----------



## wiskey (Dec 13, 2005)

i rekkon they're all actors but they've all been told they're the only one. 

but i dont understand how ch4 are making money from this? no phone lines etc

wiskers

btw i'm waching the excellent thing on bbc2 on autism


----------



## Allan (Dec 13, 2005)

wiskey said:
			
		

> but i dont understand how ch4 are making money from this? no phone lines etc




Good point. Wouldn't it be great if they were told that Ch4 could vote for each of them in turn to be blown out of the airlock, an airlock they believe is real!


----------



## D'wards (Dec 13, 2005)

Allan said:
			
		

> Good point. Wouldn't it be great if they were told that Ch4 could vote for each of them in turn to be blown out of the airlock, an airlock they believe is real!




Fantastic idea.

...or maybe they could liven it up by announcing a "Ipswich, we have a problem" type emergency. Claim the spaceship is fucked, and they have a very small chance of getting home. That'd sort the men from the boys.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (Dec 13, 2005)

That may draw in the viewers (currently averaging a pitiful 2 million) but I guess footage of the male contestants changing/showering is a hell of a lot easier... and cheaper


----------



## lostexpectation (Dec 14, 2005)

*better*

tonights show was more entertaining, it showed all the money shots that should have been shown yesterday, the take off, behinds the scenes, seeing the earth, the contestents reactions and the brilliant ad-libbing from the actors 

the c4 forum is class today we had a smimulator engineer come on post and then be told off by his boss, then some photos taken over the fence (both removed) 
dozens of ryan was in a advert posts :/


they still know its not real and are going along with it at some level


----------



## lighterthief (Dec 14, 2005)

D'wards said:
			
		

> ...or maybe they could liven it up by announcing a "Ipswich, we have a problem" type emergency. Claim the spaceship is fucked, and they have a very small chance of getting home. That'd sort the men from the boys.


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 14, 2005)

DexterTCN said:
			
		

> I'm not sitting to watch some multi-national TV station rip the piss out of a bunch of wannabees just so they can sell me a fucking Sony walkman during the adverts.


What mulitnational TV station?


----------



## ATOMIC SUPLEX (Dec 14, 2005)

I'm pretty sure they know it's not real now but so want to be on TV that they are keeping the whole thing going. 

Total bollocks, I just don't see the point in this show. It's not funny and it's not interesting, C4 should have really thought this though.


----------



## billy_bob (Dec 14, 2005)

What amazes me is, after 9 pages of "is it a hoax?" discussion, no-ones worked this out.  

The joke IS on us, because they actually ARE in space, it's just made to look like it's all pretend.  The people in the programme are in on it.  So we spend a few weeks laughing at how gullible and stupid they all are, or wringing our hands at how cruel it all is, then it'll turn out we're the ones who've been fooled and IT WAS ALL REAL.

It's like the moon landing footage in reverse it's rigged to look like they haven't gone into space when they have.

COME ON PEOPLE, it's so obvious!!!


----------



## belboid (Dec 14, 2005)

that'd be, like, rilly funny.

If someone hadn't made the same joke about four pages back.


----------



## billy_bob (Dec 14, 2005)

belboid said:
			
		

> that'd be, like, rilly funny.
> 
> If someone hadn't made the same joke about four pages back.



  Well, you don't expect me to read _9 pages_ of discussion about a reality TV show which almost everyone on here thinks is shite _properly _before posting my own ill-thought out contribution, do you?


----------



## belboid (Dec 14, 2005)

fair point!


----------



## TeeJay (Dec 14, 2005)

lostexpectation said:
			
		

> they still know its not real and are going along with it at some level


Do you think they are under some kind of hyponosis?


----------



## ATOMIC SUPLEX (Dec 14, 2005)

TeeJay said:
			
		

> Do you think they are under some kind of hyponosis?


Being on TV does genuinely have some hypnotic qualities and works on the mind in the same suggestive way (true). That's why things like brass eye can happen. More in common with the DNA of a crab?


----------



## wiskey (Dec 14, 2005)

billy_bob said:
			
		

> The joke IS on us, because they actually ARE in space, it's just made to look like it's all pretend.



the thing is - prove it. you arent the first to say that this is whats happening but i dont see how they can prove they ARE in space. 

like i say i believe the joke is on us. i think they are all actors but i dont think they are in space. 

where is ch4 getting its money from? does anybody know??


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 14, 2005)

Somebody must have rumbled it, cos they've pulled the live feed


----------



## akirajoel (Dec 14, 2005)

Orang Utan said:
			
		

> Somebody must have rumbled it, cos they've pulled the live feed



*DUM! DUM! DUM!*


----------



## Donna Ferentes (Dec 14, 2005)

Whatever happened to Urban75 "moon landings were faked" threads, anyway?


----------



## monkeyhead (Dec 14, 2005)

wouldnt it be a bit suicidal, from a business point of view, to be a con on the TV audience? why would anyone watch a reality show like this again if it's all rubbish?


----------



## WouldBe (Dec 14, 2005)

D'wards said:
			
		

> Fantastic idea.
> 
> ...or maybe they could liven it up by announcing a "Ipswich, we have a problem" type emergency. Claim the spaceship is fucked, and they have a very small chance of getting home. That'd sort the men from the boys.



Start a small fire on-board and watch the horror on the tourists faces when the 2 cosmonauts dive through the hatch without space suits on.


----------



## LilMissHissyFit (Dec 14, 2005)

Orang Utan said:
			
		

> Somebody must have rumbled it, cos they've pulled the live feed



or maybe Billy and Kerri joined the 3ft off the ground in a hangar club and C4 decided it was so juicy they had to keep it for later


----------



## DJ Squelch (Dec 14, 2005)

Donna Ferentes said:
			
		

> Whatever happened to Urban75 "moon landings were faked" threads, anyway?



Those threads never really happened, they were just an illusion created by the Editor & all the posters on them were actors.


----------



## Ozric (Dec 15, 2005)

WouldBe said:
			
		

> Start a small fire on-board and watch the horror on the tourists faces when the 2 cosmonauts dive through the hatch without space suits on.


Now that I'd pay to see.


----------



## pengaleng (Dec 15, 2005)

I think its shit.

turned it off as soon as I heard that fucking bleepy buzzing they are using as fucking speech filters


----------



## tendril (Dec 15, 2005)

what are they filtering out?


----------



## lostexpectation (Dec 16, 2005)

*its actually good*

i was miffed at the beginning cos we saw so little and they cocked up the launch and they still didn't guess, but watching tonight as they heard clear voices outside the sim and the charlie guy has to convince he's just hearing things/cabin fever is great...


----------



## Pie 1 (Dec 16, 2005)

tribal_princess said:
			
		

> I think its shit.
> 
> turned it off as soon as I heard that fucking bleepy buzzing they are using as fucking speech filters



I know it's totally & randomly off topic, but I read Nick Hornby's new book A Long Way Down the other week, and throughout the entire book, I had TP down for the character of Jess.

As you were.


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 16, 2005)

tendril said:
			
		

> what are they filtering out?


Potentially slanderous or libellous comments and mentions of brand names to avoid 'undue prominence' ie potential inadvertant product placement


----------



## billy_bob (Dec 16, 2005)

wiskey said:
			
		

> the thing is - prove it. you arent the first to say that this is whats happening but i dont see how they can prove they ARE in space.
> 
> like i say i believe the joke is on us. i think they are all actors but i dont think they are in space.



I don't really believe it. I was making a joke. Sheesh.


----------



## punkrockfaggot (Dec 16, 2005)

There's something missing from this program to make it watchable...

MONKEY!!!


----------



## WouldBe (Dec 16, 2005)

belboid said:
			
		

> you _really_ don't understand the supposed premise of the programme do you.



Obviously more clearly than you.

The ground based cadets were told last night it was all a hoax. They were told that there was debate on bulletin boards that some of them were actors especially the curly haired guy. He explained that him and his mates were sat in a pub when a film crew came in and asked for volunteers for a commercial.

Now how does it go.... Ah yes

*Whistle while you work*
*Belboid is a twerp*
*He's half barmy*
*So's his army*
*Whistle while you work*


----------



## skyscraper101 (Dec 16, 2005)

OK they might all be dim enough not to know there's no such thing as anti-gravity machines but how do they account for the fact that on their supposed flight to Russia there was a certain gain in time as they would have travelled at least 3 hours ahead in time zones.

Aren't time zones supposed to regulate the daylight hours accordingly for each country? So wouldn't they have at least sussed it's getting dark 7pm/8pm each day which surely isn't right given this time of year


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 16, 2005)

Looking at the contestants , i reckon you could fool them into saying they were making a moon landing


----------



## belboid (Dec 16, 2005)

WouldBe said:
			
		

> Obviously more clearly than you.


methinks not - they're (supposedly) looking for the gullible, not the cynical.  Alternatively, you could be saying I'm actually right, and a better actor than you. 



> The ground based cadets were told last night it was all a hoax.


aye, saw a bit of that.  There reactions weren't particularly convincing, imo.



> They were told that there was debate on bulletin boards that some of them were actors especially the curly haired guy. He explained that him and his mates were sat in a pub when a film crew came in and asked for volunteers for a commercial.


so?



> Now how does it go.... Ah yes
> 
> *Whistle while you work*
> *Belboid is a twerp*
> ...


don't tell him WouldBe!


----------

