# Eurovision 2018



## Dr. Furface (Feb 7, 2018)

So here we go again, the road to Lisbon for the UK entrants starts tonight on BBC2. 6 songs to choose from, check 'em out here if you really can't wait til the show starts at 7.30... You Decide, 2018, Eurovision Song Contest - Clips - BBC One


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## cybershot (Feb 7, 2018)

Another nil points year I think, not that the songs are bad, just none of them have any chance of winning Eurovision.

The Goldstone one probably has the best chance of at least scraping several points.

Then again, last years winner was a bit mellon collie


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## Vintage Paw (Feb 7, 2018)

I'm listening to the songs now. I shall post my thoughts as I go.

SuRie, _Storm_ -- this does sound very Eurovisz, but isn't particularly memorable. It's not a nil pointer, but it's not a top 10 either.

Jaz Ellington, _You_ -- pleasant enough but not in the least bit Eurovisz, and a tale of shagging one girl while you're in love with another isn't really the message we want to represent us is it?

Liam Tamne, _Astronaut_ -- eh. It's fine, and he's super hot which is a plus (Eurovisz likes it's solo hot dudes at the moment), but it's not especially memorable. However, it has the potential to be good with some technically spectacular staging, the astronaut theme could lend itself to some of that weird animation/light show/drawings on the backdrop type stuff that everyone goes gaga over, but then it's the technical people winning and not the song...

Raya, _Crazy_ -- I can see this on the stage, it's typical Eurovisz fare but it's not a high scorer. Bottom half of the score board.

Asanda, _Legends_ -- Same as the last one, I can see this on the stage, it sounds Eurovisz, it's a bit repetitive, but I like it more than _Crazy_. Bottom half of the score board again, though.

Goldstone, _I Feel the Love_ -- the only group and the only song with a title that has more than one word. The lyrics have a Eurovisz sentiment ("I feel the love in my city" wtf lol) but god it's a shit song. Bottom 5.

So, to sum up, I think SuRie has the most Eurovisz song, but it's not a winner. Liam Tamne's song could do well but only with the right staging and of course we're not going to see the staging tonight. Asanda's song comes third, but is sadly too repetitive to do very well. Raya comes a close fourth, with Jaz and Goldstone trailing miserably behind.


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## Vintage Paw (Feb 7, 2018)

My annual recommendation to follow Kit Lovelace (@kitlovelace) on Twitter for the best technical commentary. He's been creating a 'science of Eurovision' for the past few years, studying what makes a winner and what makes a loser. He gives a breakdown of each song's merits and scores them accordingly. An indispensable accompaniment to the night's festivities.


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## Vintage Paw (Feb 7, 2018)

Watching the show live my order of preference remained the same, although Asanda didn't perform as well as the song needed, but she's only 16!

Liam's song would have required the proper staging and since they're not having led screens in Lisbon that was a big red flag (that's definitely the reason they mentioned it at that point). In the end the right song won, although Kit Lovelace is cautioning us about sending a Major key, the fact it's about storms is a good thing.

I maintain it's not a top 10 on the leaderboard song, but I don't think it's a bottom 10 either... roll on May!


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## seeformiles (Feb 8, 2018)

If Eurovision is sticking a musical thermometer up the backside of Europe to take the political temperature, I reckon Brexit will mean nul points all round from our neighbours even if our song went to No.1 all over the world. Not really sure why we bother anymore tbh.


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## ska invita (Feb 8, 2018)

seeformiles said:


> If Eurovision is sticking a musical thermometer up the backside of Europe to take the political temperature, I reckon Brexit will mean nul points all round from our neighbours even if our song went to No.1 all over the world. Not really sure why we bother anymore tbh.


it doesnt work that way. UK got 111 points last year (after Brexit)
The UK loses because it always has shit songs
and why do you think everyone in Europe hates the UK because of Brexit? Quite a popular idea around Europe seems to me. If Europeans dont like the UK its not to do with Brexit...


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## editor (Feb 8, 2018)

I had the misfortune to listen to the winning song. It's like ten bland songs all shunted together to create a towering pillar of shitness.


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## Lucy Fur (Feb 8, 2018)

editor said:


> I had the misfortune to listen to the winning song. It's like ten bland songs all shunted together to create a towering pillar of shitness.


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## Dr. Furface (Feb 8, 2018)

editor said:


> I had the misfortune to listen to the winning song. It's like ten bland songs all shunted together to create a towering pillar of shitness.


Think yourself lucky you didn't hear the other 5!


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## seeformiles (Feb 8, 2018)

ska invita said:


> it doesnt work that way. UK got 111 points last year (after Brexit)
> The UK loses because it always has shit songs
> and why do you think everyone in Europe hates the UK because of Brexit? Quite a popular idea around Europe seems to me. If Europeans dont like the UK its not to do with Brexit...



Yep it’s true that it’s a tad simplistic to blame Brexit as there’s plenty of other factors at play here. I suppose we’ve been trying to raise our game as regards quality of songs in recent years - rather than treat it as a joke and put in any old crap. Expansion of competing countries and block voting is probably a bigger factor - not to mention regional musical taste. 20 years ago, any entry with any hint of a middle eastern musical scale and flavour was doomed but now, with the Balkans and Russia, it’s mainstream. Perhaps with UK and US still dominating popular music we get a bit arrogant. I stand corrected


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## ska invita (Feb 8, 2018)

seeformiles said:


> Yep it’s true that it’s a tad simplistic to blame Brexit as there’s plenty of other factors at play here. I suppose we’ve been trying to raise our game as regards quality of songs in recent years - rather than treat it as a joke and put in any old crap. Expansion of competing countries and block voting is probably a bigger factor - not to mention regional musical taste. 20 years ago, any entry with any hint of a middle eastern musical scale and flavour was doomed but now, with the Balkans and Russia, it’s mainstream. Perhaps with UK and US still dominating popular music we get a bit arrogant. I stand corrected


you know i dont think its as complicated as all that...last year that super quirky no-drum jazz ballad, sung in Portuguese won it by a distance. It really comes down to the tune and performance having a certain something. Another year its Finnish metal. Another year its a cheeky smiling boy with a fiddle.
Rutita1 has called the winner two years in a row now...id check with her for any betting tips!


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## seeformiles (Feb 8, 2018)

ska invita said:


> you know i dont think its as complicated as all that...last year that super quirky no-drum jazz ballad, sung in Portuguese won it by a distance. It really comes down to the tune and performance having a certain something.
> Rutita1 has picked the winner two years in a row now...id check with her for any betting tips!



I liked last year’s winner since it stood apart from all the bombastic power ballads with their big drums and flames that seem to have dominated for a while now.


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## Vintage Paw (Feb 9, 2018)

Mr Portugal last year reminded me of 2008's Sebastien Tellier for France (2008 remains my favourite Eurovision year, which also brought us head-scratching weirdness from Spain, these swashbucklers from Latvia, this misplaced attempt to recreate Lordi's success by Finland, this delight by Azerbaijan, this camp marvel from Ukraine, this (ultimately futile) message of hope from Georgia, the part-man part-wolf from Lithuania, Bulgaria's visionary attempt, this euro-poppy piece from the most aptly-named band in the contest from Iceland, Andorra's entry which was very much of its time, Portugal's passionate entry, my joint fave of the evening from Bosnia & Herzegovina, and of course the iconic winner from Russia - but wait, we cannot forget this... _interesting_ outing from Ireland), despite the tone of the song being different it had that off-beat quirk to it.


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## ska invita (Apr 30, 2018)

Just realised this is a week away!


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## rekil (Apr 30, 2018)

Plucky Macedonia has cod reggae verses. #brave 



Spoiler


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## ska invita (Apr 30, 2018)

copliker said:


> Plucky Macedonia has cod reggae verses. #brave
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler



a little bit of cod last year from spain too iirc


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## rekil (Apr 30, 2018)

ska invita said:


> a little bit of cod last year from spain too iirc


Last place with 5 pity points from Portugal. Never go full cod.


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## ska invita (Apr 30, 2018)

Ouch!


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## rekil (Apr 30, 2018)

Israel has got a woman doing a chicken impression and France is the most little bit communism one.


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## Treacle Toes (Apr 30, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Just realised this is a week away!



I have called it correctly the last two years running...am I set for a hat trick?


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## Treacle Toes (Apr 30, 2018)

copliker said:


> Plucky Macedonia has cod reggae verses. #brave
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler




Fucking hell they have covered all bases with this...over the top sexualised reggae/soft rock/pop ballad/brit pop-guitar nonsense with 80's synth outfits


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## ska invita (Apr 30, 2018)

I don't like to play these before the big night... Spoils the novelty


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## Treacle Toes (Apr 30, 2018)

ska invita said:


> I don't like to play these before the big night... Spoils the novelty



Well I already did play that one obviously...it won't win. You heard it here first.


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## Vintage Paw (Apr 30, 2018)

Israel is going to win. The opera singer will come second.


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## not-bono-ever (May 2, 2018)

ah fuck, I have just realised I will be on the road that week . will have to find a bar to watch it somehow


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## rekil (May 8, 2018)

Cyprus reggaeton woman is the favourite now. I think she was 50-1 a couple of weeks ago. She burns a posh car (gentrifiers, petrolheads) in the vid and mentions the pelican, symbol of protection and self sacrifice. 



Spoiler


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## skyscraper101 (May 8, 2018)

Is there actually anything interesting worth tuning in for - i.e. something equivalent to Lordi or the porn tastic Polish milk maids?


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## rekil (May 8, 2018)

skyscraper101 said:


> Is there actually anything interesting worth tuning in for - i.e. something equivalent to Lordi or the porn tastic Polish milk maids?


San Marino has little dancing robots.


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## Vintage Paw (May 8, 2018)

copliker said:


> Cyprus reggaeton woman is the favourite now. I think she was 50-1 a couple of weeks ago. She burns a posh car (gentrifiers, petrolheads) in the vid and mentions the pelican, symbol of protection and self sacrifice.
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler




Boring as shit, that. Unless they change the arrangement I can’t see it translating into anything interesting on the stage.


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## Vintage Paw (May 8, 2018)

skyscraper101 said:


> Is there actually anything interesting worth tuning in for - i.e. something equivalent to Lordi or the porn tastic Polish milk maids?



Israel. She’s going to win.


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## Vintage Paw (May 8, 2018)

Hope she brings the Victoria Wood backing dancer with her.


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## Sue (May 8, 2018)

For any fans/people glutton for punishment...

London's Biggest Eurovision Party!!! 

Eurovision Party London 2018 - Rio Cinema


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## rekil (May 8, 2018)

Denmark's appears to be about vikings who bottle it.



> Be the first to turn around
> Take the leap to land on higher ground
> Call in, surrender



(The highest ground in Denmark is 171 metres, a little hill)


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## MickiQ (May 8, 2018)

The last time I watched the Eurovision our entry was Bucks Fizz (we won too if memory serves)  I intend to carry on not watching it this year but after a quick google Its interesting to note that Australia is now in Europe, the world has really changed since 1981.


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## rekil (May 8, 2018)

Greek dirge ftw.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Most years I avoid the songs until the semi final shows so that I can be surprised. But this year I've listened to snippets of each song from the rehearsals and done a bit of research for the scorecard I'm making and it's just made me even more excited to be honest.

The last few years haven't been quite as what-the-fuck as Eurovision can be in it's prime. I think 2013 was probably the last really good vintage - with falsetto-Romanian-dracula and man-in-a-perspex-box. It was also the year Montenegro got *fucking robbed* in the semi final. But this year... I think it could be a good one. I've heard rumours about Bulgaria's staging and props being properly surreal, Israel's entry is catchy as fuck and Czech republic... I don't know if I love it or hate it but I seriously suggest having subtitles on because the lyrics are not to be believed.

One hour to go! I'm so excited


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Reading the Popbitch Guide to Eurovision and this is their intro for Iceland:



> Iceland
> It’s roughly 2,000 miles between Reykjavik and Lisbon. Each person in Iceland’s delgation will add 0.98 tons to their carbon footprint for the return trip. Given that the planet is dying, you’d think they’d try to make it count. But, no. They’ve served up this shit instead.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

It's all a bit earnest and uplifting so far.

Get to the good stuff!


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I'm not sure about Albania's outfit.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

"We don't have enough sparkly fabric for your whole jacket, but if you wear this belt no-one will notice"


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Better do the whole song like this.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Oh, boo...


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

This feels very 90s.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

In case you missed it - they explained before the acts started that they've done away with the giant video-wall on stage this year so more acts have gone all-out on the props and batshit staging.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I've had to turn the volume up just to hear Belgium


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Ok, has Brexit created a fabric shortage across Europe??


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Oh it's Tomorrow Never Dies


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> In case you missed it - they explained before the acts started that they've done away with the giant video-wall on stage this year so more acts have gone all-out on the props and batshit staging.


Hm... I will reserve judgement, but I do love the video wall.

#blameBrexit


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Um, Israeli inflatable axe...?


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

OK, read along with the lyrics for this one, cos... wow


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

It's a Gap advert!


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Depending on which version they go with it might be the first broadcast of the word "motherfucker" on Eurovision


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Subtitles are _not_ keeping up...


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I think they censored it

Mikolas Josef – Lie to Me Lyrics | Genius Lyrics


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Ahaha they couldn't even synchronise the butt-wiggle


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Why is this not-Scott-Mills commentator talking like he's doing the snooker?


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Lie To Me - I hate that I like it


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

So basically Lithuania put last year's winner and Emmelie De Forest in a cloning machine and this came out.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

FUCKING GHOSTS!!


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I desperately want someone to stack it on the bridge


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Okay that was actually quite touching


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

First outing this year for my classic "fuck off, Scott Mills" catchphrase.

Always combined with hitting the mute button, of course.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I fucking love Moldova's manager


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Israel is one of my favourites this year


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

What's Hebrew for "cultural appropriation"?


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Israel is another one with good Eurovision-y lyrics



> Hey! My "Simon says" leave me alone
> I'm taking my Pikachu home
> You're stupid just like your smartphone


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Ok, it does rather sound like she _was_ saying motherfucking 

"Everyone loves a bit of marketing, especially in Belarus" - the fucking inanity is staggering.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Aw, dude was shaking something serious!


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Ok this is the one I've been waiting for.

I've heard things about their staging and if it's accurate it's going to be the thing people remember about this year's show.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Aw, dude was shaking something serious!


Apparently their first rehersal was awful and they really improved in the second. Maybe it's nerves but maybe it's acting.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

What is that box on wheels in the background


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Is it cheating to get the camera-operator involved in the staging?


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> Apparently their first rehersal was awful and they really improved in the second. Maybe it's nerves but maybe it's acting.


I figured it was nerves, which is understandable!


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Woah...

American Beauty via Cronenberg body-horror.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Good combination of over the top Eurovision dancing and a rose being shot through his had.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I want Belarus to go through just for the special effects


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

She's going to shatter that stage with her voice if she's not careful


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Romania did it better in 2013


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Although I do like the "no video wall? Fuck ya, I'll wear me bloody own" attitude.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Although I do like the "no video wall? Fuck ya, I'll wear me bloody own" attitude.


That was a big 2013 thing too - I think about 6 entries used that as a thing.

There is ONE dubstep break mid-song this year á la 2013 but I can't remember which song.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Bulgaria have made it to the early-2000s, apparently.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Oooh the blonde lady looks like she's getting ready to do something.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I was expecting a little more from her given the build-up they gave her tbh.

I like the song but I don't think the tempo is quite fast enough for it to be in the running to win


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

I'm going on record that that guy is _not_ fucking playing that guitar.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I love the postcards at the start of each act. They're all ways so good.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Ok, is this legitimately supposed to be the musical equivalent of channel hopping?


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

That is a truly god-awful outfit


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> That is a truly god-awful outfit


Fuck me it got worse


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> That is a truly god-awful outfit


I was going to reserve comment...


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

That top actually adheres to her boobs the way fabric does in terrible cartoon images of busty women. It defies physics.


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## editor (May 8, 2018)

I randomly flicked on to this and had to turn off after two 'songs,' one by an inane grinning lantern jawed youth wearing a backpack.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Someone left the door open.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

editor said:


> I randomly flicked on to this and had to turn off after two 'songs,' one by an inane grinning lantern jawed youth wearing a backpack.


If the lyric "I know you wop-bop-a-lu-bop on his wood bamboo" isn't enough to keep you watching there's no hope for you I'm afraid.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Croatia have sent budget-Alicia-Keys


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Oh fuck me, it's fucking _him._


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Why can we never text vote in the UK? I remember them saying that over and over again when I watched this 13 years ago and I figured "Ok, it's not set up for UK viewers this year but we'll get text voting next year." But no.

Get it sorted!


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## rekil (May 8, 2018)

Fab Greek dirge up soon.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

I need a dollar, dollar...


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Fuck Austria's song.

Lyrics include



> I’m in too deep
> I can’t let you leave



and



> It wouldn’t be right letting you go



and



> So am I wrong giving my all making you stay tonight?



Creepy as fuck.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Greece once again get points for singing in Greek.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)




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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

I think she just said "all is you", or something along those lines.


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## toblerone3 (May 8, 2018)

nonplussed by Greece's entry this year.


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## The39thStep (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> Fuck Austria's song.
> 
> Lyrics include
> 
> ...


Americanised tosh


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Oooh her hand wasn't metallic in rehearsals, it was just block-blue.

This is the fascinating stuff you miss when you don't do your homework.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I think she just said "all is you", or something along those lines.


My favourite Eurovision tradition is you trying to guess Greece's lyrics 

I saw on the website that they were singing in Greek again this year and I was so happy.


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## The39thStep (May 8, 2018)

toblerone3 said:


> nonplussed by Greece's entry this year.


I'm watching this in a Portuguese bar and even they are confused . Bizarre


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

There has to be someone online doing an alternative commentary stream.  Fuck's sake...


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

She's done a lot to improve my feelings for solo female singers in floor length white dresses at Eurovision. They're usually so much worse than that.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Please tell me someone is off camera with a handful of throwing knives.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Interesting shot selection from the director there.

Backing singer stacked it!


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

YES! Eurovision props! Fuck the video wall


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Not listening to it particularly closely, but that was pretty fun.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Right, my Armenian is even worse than my Greek...


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## toblerone3 (May 8, 2018)

..the Eurovision drop...


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

So many Eurovision outfits feel like they couldn't decide which of two or three outfits they wanted, so tried to wear them all.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

If you ask google translate what Qami means in Armenian it tells you it means "queer" but according to all the translations I've seen it's supposed to be "Wind"


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> If you ask google translate what Qami means in Armenian it tells you it means "queer" but according to all the translations I've seen it's supposed to be "Wind"


I don't know if it was a deliberate double-meaning thing on the part of Armena or if Google Translate just needs to sort itself out.


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## The39thStep (May 8, 2018)

Finland well known for golf and women spinning round on a wheeling


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I'm going on record that that guy is _not_ fucking playing that guitar.


I'm further going on record that that guy ain't playing those fucking drums, either.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Can see this doing well.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Switzerland answering the question "Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?"


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

That's a fine from FIFA...


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## rekil (May 8, 2018)

Ireland is essential put the bins out time. Cyprus reggaeton woman will be the best of this lot.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Oh, fuck me. Looking like a proper Irish man abroad


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## The39thStep (May 8, 2018)

Never thought of the Swiss as being raunchy . Note Toblerone, banking and weather clocks. She'd scare the life out of me .


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Yeah I don't know what's been up with Ireland's entries in the past few years but they are even worse than ours.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> Yeah I don't know what's been up with Ireland's entries in the past few years but they are even worse than ours.


The 90s famously almost bankrupted them. You think they'd be over it by now...

Recently they've seemed to be very "we won't actually take the piss, but we don't want to win the fucker".


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

"when you're out, you're out" and "They really need to go through tonight" - as opposed to the other acts.

Stellar commentary from Scott Mills as usual.

At least there's no Mel saying 'Eurovizsh" this year.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Fair play for the two lads, though.


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## The39thStep (May 8, 2018)

Ireland churning out X.Factor type mediocrity .


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I'm calling it - Ireland is this year's worst entry.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Hey! I remember this from Eurovision in the mid-2000s!


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Now THAT is an outfit.


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## The39thStep (May 8, 2018)

Cyprus top in the hair movement category .


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

This amount of pyro feels like cheating.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

There's a lot of cross-cultural songs this year. Cyprus is singing in Italian, Slovenia has some Portuguese lyrics and one other act and another act has some Icelandic lyrics, I can't remember which one though.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

It has all the makings of a Eurovision hit.


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## The39thStep (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> There's a lot of cross-cultural songs this year. Cyprus is singing in Italian, Slovenia has some Portuguese lyrics and one other act and another act has some Icelandic lyrics, I can't remember which one though.


That's exactly what a loads of blokes were saying as they watched Cyprus .


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> Oh it's Tomorrow Never Dies


Possibly World Is Not Enough.

I mean, they were both of a style...


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I do love Belgium's style in general, just not really the song.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Possibly World Is Not Enough.
> 
> I mean, they were both of a style...


I originally posted that but then went and listened to each song and edited.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Tempted to vote for Macedonia because if I have to see that outfit I want to inflict it on all the people who only watch the final.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Oh my god Ireland's entourage are doing some kind of choreographed dancing to their song on the green room sofa.

Not choreography from the performance, something they've made up just to dance along on camera.


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Air violin


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Seriously though, getting a bunch of last year's entries to collaborate and sing last year's winner is a nice touch.


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## Lord Camomile (May 8, 2018)

Ohhhhh, god.


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## 1927 (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> I'm calling it - Ireland is this year's worst entry.


They will still win tho, cos they don't stick their head above the trenches enough to fall out with anyone In europe, and they have a reputation for being lovable, cheeky chappies!


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## red rose (May 8, 2018)

1927 said:


> They will still win tho, cos they don't stick their head above the trenches enough to fall out with anyone In europe, and they have a reputation for being lovable, cheeky chappies!


They haven't even qualified in the last four years.

Over the course of Eurovision history they have had a lot of success but based on recent years they're performing way below average.


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I love the fake phone thing. Or I would if our commentators would SHUT THE FUCK UP


----------



## 1927 (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> They haven't even qualified in the last four years.
> 
> Over the course of Eurovision history they have had a lot of success but based on recent years they're performing way below average.


Thankfully i was unaware of that fact having not watched it in years!


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I love this Eurotrashy "documentary" but he looks more like the grandfather from Gilmore Girls than David Attenborough


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I voted for Belarus


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Moldova tried to represent their flag with their costumes but without the heraldry on the yellow dress it's basically just the Romanian flag.


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

The "big five" this year are proof that no one should have a free pass to the final except last year's winner. Because they're all utter crap.


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Okay that was a pretty cute ukulele moment from Portugal


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Top awkward eurovision host banter there


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Booo Austria, you suck and your t-shirt sucks.


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

If Lithuania can go through there's hope for Ireland - similar styles and staging.


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

I just shouted "fuck off" so loud at Albania going through that I startled the cat


----------



## red rose (May 8, 2018)

Poor Belarus and Greece, and I was sure Switzerland would go through.


----------



## toblerone3 (May 8, 2018)

red rose said:


> Top awkward eurovision host banter there



It would be really trying and irritating to spend a whole night talking to them.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 8, 2018)

Not looking at the results as running behind ..my predictions going to the vote were...
Belgium
Albania
Israel
Bulgaria
Austria
Greece
Finland
Armenia
Ireland
Cyprus
Estonia


----------



## rekil (May 8, 2018)

toblerone3 said:


> It would be really trying and irritating to spend a whole night talking to them.


I would follow Daniela Ruah around demanding answers to plotholes in half remembered NCIS Los Angeles episodes.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 8, 2018)

Right... 8/11 not bad
.
Belgium - no
Albania- yes
Estonia - yes
Israel - yes
Bulgaria- yes
Austria - yes
Greece - no
Finland - yes
Armenia- no
Ireland - yes
Cyprus- yes


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 8, 2018)

Really happy Croatia didn't get through with that rip off of Sam Brown"s Stop with a silly rap.

That cartoon character from Czech is very annoying and clearly the youth vote.

Surprised that Belgium didn't through and I had a soft spot for Greece.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 8, 2018)

I thought the power ballad Qami from Armenia was strong too...terrible jumper though.


----------



## ska invita (May 9, 2018)

I liked the Irish entry... Nice falsetto (apart from a couple of flat really high notes) and a welcome change of mood from the usual euro fair. 

I've got the Finnish one stuck in my head...euro melody very standard stuff...not scared any more...catchy.

Feel bad for Belgium. They've been very classy the last three years now iirc.


----------



## The39thStep (May 9, 2018)

Cyprus are now co favourites


----------



## rekil (May 9, 2018)

The39thStep said:


> Cyprus are now co favourites


There'll be a few further odds changes depending on how tomorrow's performances go. Lithuania seems to be this year's dark horse.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 9, 2018)

Lithunania were okay but I can't stand that affected baby bird type of singing. She has a decent voice behind that nonsense.

Cyprus, will do well as the track is comercial but a massive rip off/pastiche of Beyonce Single ladies and Halo.


----------



## Chz (May 9, 2018)

Aha, I knew where I'd seen the Bulgarian group before...


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 9, 2018)

The Black Eyed Peas I mean Bulgaria... quite a decent track but terrible staging and far too many people involved.


----------



## Vintage Paw (May 9, 2018)

Based on yesterday's semis, my favourites so far are Estonia, Israel and Bulgaria. I think I'm too old to appreciate Cyprus, I just don't get why it's at all popular, but since it is with the yoof I have to put them in my top 5.

I think I want Estonia to win because it's such a beautiful spectacle, and I'm not ashamed to say it made me cry at the end.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Right then....round two!


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Given the title of Norway's entry it had better be good or they'll look really silly.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

This bloke's greedy... He already won some years ago... Norwegian Jamiroqui with a violin. Needs a hat.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Where's Lord Camomile to tell us whether he is really playing that violin


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

No band name has ever made me suspect that someone might be an alien/lizard person more.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Phantoms of the pop-rock opera from Romania....wtf?


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Sounds like "You got the music in you" by the New Radicals.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

That was a pants entry from Romania


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> That was a pants entry from Romania


I liked her half dress, half shorts outfit. Start wearing purple!


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Ohhjh like this intro from serbia


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Oh....it's a pagan ritual. 

Sinister side flames from the big guy but a catchy song.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> I liked her half dress, half shorts outfit. Start wearing purple!


That dress was the only redeeming feature of the whole performance.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Serbia have a great mix of folky stuff and cheesy dance music. I really like it.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

I really hope San Marino qualify this year, theirs is so silly


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Where is San Marino?


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

It's a small principality in Italy, it's their equivalent of Monaco


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Shades of spinal tap Stonehenge with those little robots.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

SM's track is crap! Crap rap and silly outfit.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> Serbia have a great mix of folky stuff and cheesy dance music. I really like it.


Agreed.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

In the rehearsal the robot held up a sign that said "Justice for Valentina" who was San Marino's entry 4 years in a row and only qualified once.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> In the rehearsal the robot held up a sign that said "Justice for Valentina" who was San Marino's entry 4 years in a row and only qualified once.


Ohhjh bitter!


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Winter is coming.....


----------



## Indeliblelink (May 10, 2018)

I like this one.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Ohhjh bitter!


I was really gutted they didn't do it tonight.


----------



## rekil (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Winter is coming.....


It's about vikings pulling a sickie.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Error does anyone remember that serious with a lion bloke living in a subway in the eighties... Well his Danish Viking cousin is singing now...

Big guys ready for battle!


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

I wasnt expecting to like Denmark's entry but it's pretty good 

Key change! First one of the competition I think.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

A bit like the Viking dream boys...


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)




----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Proper over the top Eurovision dancing from Russia there.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Same effects as opera Estonia too, although this track is well arranged and might get through.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Wah.... Prodigy type dancing there he needs to calm down.


----------



## rekil (May 10, 2018)

The Dutch one is just sad. And I tend to cheer on any old shit. Just no.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Bloke who leads a cult and insists on being called Doctor-something despite not being a doctor and 2 of his cult members.


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

copliker said:


> It's about vikings pulling a sickie.


Yeah I heard something about ”be the first to turn around"


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Moldova is clearly the best entry in this Semi final


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Moldovan cabaret. Fun and a fairly good song..


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Moldovan cabaret. Fun and a fairly good song..


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


>


I suppose you prefer turning whisky into wine with a fake American accent?


----------



## rekil (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Yeah I heard something about ”be the first to turn around"





> Be the first to turn around
> Take the leap to land on higher ground
> Call in, surrender


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

What the *fuck* is up with Netherlands' dancing?


----------



## rekil (May 10, 2018)

Australia is a proper pop song. Dunno why the odds are so shitty.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Wtf fake yank is bad enough but...error


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> What the *fuck* is up with Netherlands' dancing?


Hip hop dancing to country music...who knew?


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Big fan of Australia's dress


----------



## rekil (May 10, 2018)

Well it sounded stronger on the youtube.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Love the dress and she did a great job...loads of personality and a decent pop song.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

See, on paper it has everything for a good and successful entry. It's cheesy, sparkly, talks about love and peace and stuff but is also peppy and you can dance to it.

But I'm just not feeling it.


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Oz the best by a mile so far.

Soft spot for the quitter Vikings though


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Not enough jazz in the ethno jazz band  No Georgia, sorry. This is pop opera.


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Who knew Tim Westwood could sing?

This isn't jazz tho


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Do Georgia understand what the Eurovision song contest is?


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Who knew Tim Westwood could sing?


 I choked on my biscuit


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> See, on paper it has everything for a good and successful entry. It's cheesy, sparkly, talks about love and peace and stuff but is also peppy and you can dance to it.
> 
> But I'm just not feeling it.


I think her stage presence made a difference, all the others came ganged and tooled up


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> Do Georgia understand what the Eurovision song contest is?


Eurovision used to be more of a Hodge podge... Well done Georgia for mixing it up. Going home on a shit mini bus though


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Who knew Tim Westwood could sing?
> 
> This isn't jazz tho


Actual lol


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Why is Gunter von Hagens playing the keyboard for Poland's entry?


----------



## Indeliblelink (May 10, 2018)

Gunther von Hagens on keyboard
ETA Ha great minds think-a-like


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

So Poland has been watching too much MTV country-rock too? But it's a euro dance track ?  Why?


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> Why is Gunter von Hagens playing the keyboard for Poland's entry?


Ok I might vote for this just for his enthusiastic hand-dancing for the camera


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Is someone going to tell him where to go?


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Malta has cool pyro and special effects.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Malta...I think she will get through. Track is saleable.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Does Iceland's entry have a hickey?


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> Does Iceland's entry have a hickey?


He pulled!


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> He pulled!


He _is_ adorable


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

*Yes* Hungary


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Serious 1980's rock entry from hungary..I like them for this honesty!


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Would be a strong contender for the novelty factor if he could stay in tune


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Anyone know what the song is about?


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Barefoot and crowd diving! Did get screams key change...pow!


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Anyone know what the song is about?


It's basically a break-up song. It's about moving on and forgetting about the other person and pain etc.


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Hungary: is that the first tune to do a key change?
Eurovision used to be full of em


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Hungary: is that the first tune to do a key change?
> Eurovision used to be full of em


It's the second I think. Looking at the stats posted by Kit Lovelace on Twitter songs with key changes don't actually tend to do well overall.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

No to the red queen from Latvia...90's r&b ballad...too Las Vegas.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Sweden's entry this year is good.

You'd hope so because Sweden go all-out on their national competition to decide their entry each year.


----------



## gaijingirl (May 10, 2018)

Well I've been actually basing my lessons around this all week.

The kids (inner London teenagers) liked Israel best - initially mocking the singer but ended up with grudging respect - "actually it's calm...".  Finland was a fake Justin Bieber, they thought.

I love France best of all and the kids liked that too - but I did put it into context for them first.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> Sweden's entry this year is good.
> 
> You'd hope so because Sweden go all-out on their national competition to decide their entry each year.


No wait I'm getting them mixed up with Ukraine.

I mean this will do well but it's not my style


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Swedish Justin Timberlake...will get through, won't win.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Tune is more bouncy than his stiff hips.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

There's a serious theme of male solo performers singing about partners who have fucked them over or who they don't want anything to do with any more this year.


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

If Michael Jackson sang it out would've been great


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Right, Montenegro have been seriously hard done by in this competition since the semi finals were introduced.

This is not the best song in the competition, but it should go through because Montenegro are owed one frankly.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Bad, bad suit. Montenegro.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Nice theatrical performance but won't do well.


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

Owen Jones gave it his best there


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Slovenian bad girl, loves the bass but with a euro dance break..Saleable but the fake loss of music? Lol.


----------



## rekil (May 10, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Shades of spinal tap Stonehenge with those little robots.


They bumped into Slovenia's tape recorder.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Montenegro have brought us such greats as 

Dubstep spacemen (2013)






Fucking weird Trojan Horse (2012)





and Gay Disco Banger with interesting hair (2017)


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

New romantic dance track with goth eyes from Ukraine.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

I love Ukraine's entry this year


----------



## Indeliblelink (May 10, 2018)

I haven't watched Tuesdays round yet but tonight's performances have been a bit dull. No bonkers Eurovision oddities, Maldova the only one coming close.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Indeliblelink said:


> I haven't watched Tuesdays round yet but tonight's performances have been a bit dull. No bonkers Eurovision oddities, Maldova the only one coming close.


The first semi final was definitely the better of the two.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

To go through...

Serbia
Denmark
Russia
Moldova
Australia
Poland
Malta
Sweden
Ukraine
Slovenia


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> To go through...
> 
> Serbia
> Denmark
> ...


I think 

Norway
Russia
Denmark
Moldova
Ukraine
Slovenia
Australia
Sweden
Hungary
Then not sure about the final one, maybe Poland or Netherlands.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

I maybe should have chosen Hungary


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

God I hate this talking heads stuff with the two blandest men in world


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

I've been in the same room as the Norwegian lad.... Check me out


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

West Germany's Genghis Khan song  from 1979 is pure Eurovision.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

This guy upsets me...the stretched Botox eyessssssssse that echo in your soul....the ultra white teeth that bewitch.....bet he was alright without it.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

So, interesting news about China there.

It seems that the Chinese broadcaster Mango TV didn't air Albania's entry (due to their exposed tattoos) or Ireland's entry (presumably because it depicted a same-sex relationship) for the first semi final and also blurred out other tattoos and rainbow flags.

It's a shame, and it's also a shame that Eurovision fans in China won't get to see the final on TV now but I'm glad the EBU have sanctioned them for censoring the show like that.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

I wonder if they're censoring Italy's entry.


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

red rose said:


> I think
> 
> Norway
> Russia
> ...


Norway - yes
Russia - no
Denmark - yes
Moldova - yes
Ukraine - yes
Slovenia - yes
Australia - yes
Sweden - yes
Hungary - yes
Then not sure about the final one, maybe Poland or Netherlands. - yes

I'm a bit proud of myself right now


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 10, 2018)

Serbia - yes
Denmark-yes
Russia-no
Moldova-yes
Australia-yes
Poland-no
Malta-no
Sweden-yes
Ukraine- yes
Slovenia- yes

7/10 and knew I should have picked hungary.

Seriously disliked Netherlands and Norway...but it wasn't up  to me.


----------



## ska invita (May 10, 2018)

I hate the Norway one... Surprised they like it so much


----------



## red rose (May 10, 2018)

I was prepared this year


----------



## red rose (May 11, 2018)

I've finished my Eurovision scorecard so if anyone wants a copy it can be downloaded here

There's an A4 pdf version, straight-up images of each page or a version that should hopefully work with screen reading software, that version doesn't have images because my shitty PDF publisher kept moving all the images to different parts of the page whenever I saved it.


----------



## Vintage Paw (May 11, 2018)

So, my personal top entries are:

Estonia
Israel
Bulgaria
Moldova
Australia

and I have to throw in the UK because I do find myself humming it from time to time -- here's hoping we finish on the left of the board. And I hope Ireland do well just to fuck off the homophobes.

I'm still hoping all the buzz around Cyprus is wishful thinking because I really am still clueless as to its inordinate popularity.

I miss Mel. Sad she's relegated to reading out our scores this year. Rylan and Mel would be a good presenter duo. Mills can, as always, do one.


----------



## ska invita (May 11, 2018)

Happy to see Ireland is 3rd favourite behind Israel and Cyprus...I woke up with it in my head today + it was my mums favourite so far. I dont lurve it, but it deserves some recogniton for sure
Eurovision Winner Betting Odds | TV


----------



## red rose (May 11, 2018)

Vintage Paw said:


> I miss Mel. Sad she's relegated to reading out our scores this year. Rylan and Mel would be a good presenter duo. Mills can, as always, do one.


Rylan has had to leave due to a personal emergency so maybe they'll get her a bit more involved.


----------



## 5t3IIa (May 12, 2018)

Is it the _final_ final tonight?


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

5t3IIa said:


> Is it the _final_ final tonight?


No, there'll be another one next year.

*bm-tsh*


----------



## OzT (May 12, 2018)

You really should go on opportunity knocks with gags like that!!


----------



## rekil (May 12, 2018)

ska invita said:


> I've been in the same room as the Norwegian lad.... Check me out


Good eurovisiony title - "The World Is Like A Big Room".


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

I say room, it was the airport arrivals in Oslo, he'd just come back having won and was greeted by fans and media. You can see his grin a mile away...


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Happy to see Ireland is 3rd favourite behind Israel and Cyprus...I woke up with it in my head today + it was my mums favourite so far. I dont lurve it, but it deserves some recogniton for sure
> Eurovision Winner Betting Odds | TV



All three could win I think but Ireland is the best of the bunch for sure.



ska invita said:


> I say room, it was the airport arrivals in Oslo, he'd just come back having won and was greeted by fans and media. You can see his grin a mile away...



I really dislike that song. I also think that past winners should be barred from re-entering. Especially so they can't inflict smug nonsense tracks like this on us.


----------



## rekil (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> All three could win I think but Ireland is the best of the bunch for sure.
> 
> 
> 
> I really dislike that song. I also think that past winners should be barred from re-entering. Especially so they can't inflict smug nonsense tracks like this on us.


Minor point but it contains no practical songwriting help whatsoever. Years ago, my mate was sent by his desperate record company to a songwriter session. It involved having Cathy Dennis, the xenomania people and other big deals sitting around a table listening to hits and going "I'll have this bit, I'll have that." That's how you write a song. Cannibalise tunes and tart them up a bit.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

copliker said:


> Minor point but it contains no practical songwriting help whatsoever. Years ago, my mate was sent by his desperate record company to a songwriter session. It involved having Cathy Dennis, the xenomania people and other big deals sitting around a table listening to hits and going "I'll have this bit, I'll have that." That's how you write a song. Cannibalise tunes and tart them up a bit.



Which song are you referring to? The Irish one?

I am aware of the stealing from other music yes. I dislike the Norwegian one because it's so explicit and smug.


----------



## rekil (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Which song are you referring to? The Irish one?
> 
> I am aware of the stealing from other music yes. I dislike the Norwegian one because it's so explicit and smug.


Norway one. Its odds are crashing so that's good. Moldova will do better than odds suggest. 3rd last year cos of the sax.

Zig and Zag's 1992 is still the best Irish one that never was.



Spoiler


----------



## Kaka Tim (May 12, 2018)

the uk will come last or nearly last as everyone hates us cos brexit.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Semis are watched, bets are placed. £7.50 e/w on Ireland to win, and a fiver on Britain giving 12pts to Moldova. Can't lose


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)




----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

Sod that .. If Australia and Israel can be in it The UK certainly can/should!


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

It's time for Eurovision you guys


----------



## FabricLiveBaby! (May 12, 2018)

Hi everyone. VPN ing the BBC. 

VOTE HUNGARY 

(yay)


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

We're hereeeee but watching online so a tad delayed.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Real music to start the show off.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Iplayer really does seem to be lagging behind tonite (and no HD available that I can see). Have switched it off and will make do with the audio from the TV


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Masssssseive earrings making my ears ache in sympathy.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Portuguese is such a lovely language to sing in.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

We've put together a European picnic here: we've got various cheeses from around Europe, ricotta stuffed baby peppers, hummus and veggies, tomato flat bread, polish preztel-things, gruere cheese twists, tiramissu and muller corners cos they're made by muller 

Loving the cool traditional music


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Oh Marisa...seen her live at womad. They are pulling big acts for the show.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Oh my god Ryan Shaughnessy doing finger guns for the camera is so cheesy


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

Am I really watching this  ?

Even if I watch I am not going to vote !

No siree 

Siri .. our entry !!


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)




----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Ah, fake eye guy..


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

New romantic Dracula.


----------



## 5t3IIa (May 12, 2018)

One contact lens ah-hah-hah


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

Tonight will be the first time I have heard our entry ... 

Is it any good?


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Naff song but I love the piano-coffin as a prop


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

weltweit said:


> Tonight will be the first time I have heard our entry ...
> 
> Is it any good?


No idea..I haven't listened to any of the big 5. I spoilt the experience by watching the semis I think.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

And this first of this evo's dreary old tosh...


----------



## 5t3IIa (May 12, 2018)

End of year talent contest. Next!


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Ah young lovers... 

It shows..they won't win though.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Someone's blarted on his sleeve


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

I thought the first one was ace, was waiting for his hair to go up in flames 

This song is tedious however


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

What's Spanish for boring?


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Another bottom-five result for my country then. Boring and soppy.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

What I'd give for some Hera Björk belting out Je Ne Sais Quoi tonite...


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> What's Spanish for boring?


Aburrido. Or the less polite version: Que coñazo!


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Oh yes bass music from girl"s aloud. Will not win.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Shades of Beyonce from Slovenia


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

When we're old this song will still be boring as fuck... :/


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

From the notes I made earlier when deciding what to bet on: "Let’s do a Portugal. Hilarious sepia B-roll. Yawn"


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

They are all singing live right?


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Shades of Beyonce from Slovenia


Cyprus more though....

Here is baby bird from Lithuania,  good pop song but I can't stand the affected voice stuff.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Oh yeah they're live, there's a couple that will prove it very painfully later on, I'm sure.


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Rag n Bone Man


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

"He's also found a use for some unwanted chamoix leather"


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

He looks like he's standing on a space ship and about to be beamed onto a higher up space ship


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Another year, toward the end of the show - maybe. Not tonite.


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

England is already a winner - how many of the songs will be sung in English? 

Why would Austria sing in English?


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Great theatre singer  but a bit stiff and the Morpheus projection is just wrong


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

weltweit said:


> England is already a winner - how many of the songs will be sung in English?
> 
> Why would Austria sing in English?


They get extra points from me if they sing in their native tongue.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Inspired by The Fifth Element methinks?


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Song?


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

that's high


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Last time I watched this must be almost 30 years ago. It's much improved. And there's no twittering commentator here. I think I like it.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

If Mattel don't market this dress for the next Barbie, they're missing a trick...


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

Estonia's entry was fucking superb, they're getting extra points from me for the dress


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Amazing voice. Do you reckon she is on a step ladder under the dress though?


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

17 songs are singing at least partly in English.

Estonia are singing in Italian, Denmark are singing in English but have some Icelandic lines, Slovenia sang in Slovene but had some Portuguese, Serbia are singing in Serbian and Torlakian which is a Serbian dialect and Israel have a few Hebrew lines

Spain, Portugal, Albania, France, Hungary are all singing in their native languages.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Oh, the lovely Alexander...


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Norway, wtf?


----------



## 5t3IIa (May 12, 2018)

New Edition ripping off Mans’s’s effect things!


----------



## 5t3IIa (May 12, 2018)

Oh no shoop doops


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Arghhhhhh...this guy looked really high during the starting introductions. Smug.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Dr. Furface said:


> Song?


Not fully, but the higher opera tones did remind me of it, as well as her presence and dress designed to impress the crowd.


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

One thing: so far, from 7 songs, 3 not in English.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

So much cheese from Norway.

My partner, who is not really a Eurovision fan is even singing along with the sing along bits


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

Portugal, I didn't realise, wonder if Stanley Edwards is watching?


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

I've just looked at the running order - I don't like the next NINE songs


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

I love this singer's hair.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Austria my fave so far. Good singer, decent tune. Wtf was the opera singer doing in it?

We're marking the songs on 
Vocals
Performance
Originality
Campness
Overall impression


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

I like this Portuguese duo. Favourite so far.


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

Nate just pointed out that Portugal's song was a slowed down version of "When Love Takes Over"


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Good song from Portugal...still waiting for the drop though.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Epona said:


> Nate just pointed out that Portugal's song was a slowed down version of "When Love Takes Over"


He is right...still waiting for the drop though


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

Who pays for the costs of hosting the show?


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I didn't like the start of Portugal's entry but the more upbeat bits were ok, the harmonizing was good.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

That Portuguese girl with the black hair was lovely and from 1982 

Crap song though


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

weltweit said:


> Who pays for the costs of hosting the show?


Ignore the costumes, the Eurovision Song Contest is serious business


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Amazing voice. Do you reckon she is on a step ladder under the dress though?


I don't think so any more, she's TALL


----------



## quimcunx (May 12, 2018)

That did nothing for me. 

I didn't see any of the others I'm late.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Ours is crap. Has ripped something off but I can't think what.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Don't like this.


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Mum: You could do better, luv


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

What is with the odd lights behind siri ?


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Was that a stage invasion?


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

What the fuck, did I just hear the people in the studio _singing along_ to the UK's entry? That's new.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Was that a stage invasion?


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Oh no, it's bad despite the catchy chorus. Not a chance.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Shit!


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

Made me think of Annie Lennox for a moment


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

OH MY GOD what happened!?


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Unlucky. Sympathy vote now?


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Whoah


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Any idea what he was shouting?


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Fair fucks to the lass, just smashed it regardless


----------



## gaijingirl (May 12, 2018)

What just happened there?


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Was that a stage invasion?


What was it? I could not work it out.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

There's not supposed to be a green-room break now, this is off the cuff


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Don't worry lass, that'll get you more not less votes


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Poor woman. They should let her perform again.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

The crowd sang it for her when that prick nicked her mic, which was nice


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

S☼I said:


> Ignore the costumes, the Eurovision Song Contest is serious business


Doesn't look worth it then according to that article 

We shouldn't win then ...


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> What was it? I could not work it out.


Yes. A bloke managed to get on the stage for a few seconds, a few metres away from her.


----------



## gaijingirl (May 12, 2018)

Googled and found this quality link...

https://www.dailystar.co.uk/showbiz...bon-eurovision-final-terror-target-sas-guards

She must've been scared.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Bloke who leads a cult and insists on being called Doctor-something despite not being a doctor and 2 of his cult members.
> 
> View attachment 134961


Graham stole my fucking line, albeit for a different act.


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

FWIW this Serbian song won the practice round jury's vote this afternoon (who were already pissed, presumably)


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Graham Norton lol

"He looks like cult leader with his three suster-wives"


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

''cult leader with 3 sister wives' kin will


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

dirge

Serbia


----------



## rekil (May 12, 2018)

Sounded like "war is not peace". Pro-Assad loon crying at Iran's stuff getting bombed by the joos is my guess.

(could be wrong, might've been the portuguese 8 ace foraging)


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Great saleable track but he scares me.


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

I repeat. Far more songs than usual seem to be not in English. Is this a hard anti-brexit?


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I really liked Serbia's entry, nice mix of folk and dance and everything gets extra points if they have a big-ass set of drums on stage


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

German one = surprisingly good.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 12, 2018)

The pubs in Hesse are silent at this very minute


----------



## quimcunx (May 12, 2018)

Germany in English. What does this remind me of?


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

isvicthere? said:


> I repeat. Far more songs than usual seem to be not in English. Is this a hard anti-brexit?


I really don't think anyone in Europe is giving us that much thought to make it a deliberate thing to be honest


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Ed sheeran sings James Blunt from Germany. 

A
Nice song about his dad though.


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> I really don't think anyone in Europe is giving us that much thought to make it a deliberate thing to be honest



Yeah, probably. I'm overthinking it.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

gaijingirl said:


> Googled and found this quality link...
> 
> Eurovision 2018: 'Terror TARGET' SuRie under SAS guard after attack warnings
> 
> She must've been scared.


Holy crap, poor SuRie!


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Albania, a touch of Jethro Till prog-ness?


----------



## Supine (May 12, 2018)

The incident is here



I managed to not notice because I was reading urban


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Holy crap, poor SuRie!


Especially as the "four SAS" blokes were presumably at the bar when mic-nicker (ahem) stormed the stage


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

She must have been terrified for a few seconds, assuming that report is true.


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

Supine said:


> The incident is here
> 
> 
> 
> I managed to not notice because I was reading urban




Yeah I was out in the kitchen giving my fassolakia a stir


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

IAlbania can actually sing and it's a fairly decent pop-rock number.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

"Nazis of the UK media, we demand freedom," apparently


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Worst jacket ever though.


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

Well if he had wanted to hurt her he had all the time in the world, it seems he wanted more to make a shouted statement, even if I have no idea what it was.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Albania was good


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

This French songs boring.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

France entry: is the bloke actually playing air guitar with a real guitar? Watch his fingers.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)




----------



## xsunnysuex (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Any idea what he was shouting?


Apparently according to twitter it was

Nazis of the UK media.
We demand freedom.  War is not peace.


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Mercy!


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Seemingly dressed as fellow Frenchie, Sophie Fatale from Kill Bill...


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

My thoughts from earlier: "Moldovan sax opener, added rap. Silly outfit. Breakdancing. Dreadful."


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I liked France's outfits and the little electronic poc-poc-pocs in the song.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

I like this one. Czech at least has a bit of a fun sound to it.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Cartoon boy...noooooo!


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Turn on the subtitles for Czech rep


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> I liked France's outfits and the little electronic poc-poc-pocs in the song.


And the sentiment


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Liking this!


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> I liked France's outfits and the little electronic poc-poc-pocs in the song.


It's a nice song.


----------



## gaijingirl (May 12, 2018)

I LOVE the French entry.


----------



## magneze (May 12, 2018)

First two best so far. Flaming Dracula stairs and Slovenian bass.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I know you wop-bop-a-lu-bop on his wood bamboo is simultaneously the best and worst lyric ever.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Denmark!


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

UK odds to win now 12/1


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Oh. A boy band from Westeros has come.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Not "heavy" enough


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I like this from Denmark more every time I hear it, and I have a soft spot for the not-quite-dancing that they do


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

The most chiselled brows I think I've ever seen from Thor and the gang. Amazing.


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Denmark!


bit dull though don't you think .... 

And isn't their language good enough for them?


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

Czech entry was hilarious, I have subtitles on permanently, were those actually the lyrics?  Or were the folks doing the subtitling sitting there going "wtf?  I don't know, just type anything, no-one will know for sure"


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Walk with us


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

I see Australia has moved.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Wow pagan marching led to snow?


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Epona said:


> Czech entry was hilarious, I have subtitles on permanently, were those actually the lyrics?  Or were the folks doing the subtitling sitting there going "wtf?  I don't know, just type anything, no-one will know for sure"


Steady, plenty motherfuckers wanna eat my spaghetti


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

S☼I said:


> Oh. A boy band from Westeros has come.


Proper lol..


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I want Australia's dress


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

This good but the choreography is terrible!


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

This girl is very lovely 
Song is rubbish


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I feel like Australia really get what Eurovision is meant to be. It would do better if she had dancers instead of doing it all herself.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

This is the best so far,


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Is that it? I've got lotteria, and sorteo once results now.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Is that it? I've got lotteria, and sorteo once results now.


Lol wut


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Hi, we're Serbia and we're fucking creepy as fuck


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Ah, it's back.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Those shoes are going to ruin the course.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Nice.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

This should be the standout Eurodance number, but it lacks a certain umph...


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Baby Kate Bush meets bjork.... Not the worst but will not win.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

What’s with the Nazi chic from the dancers?


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Bring back Lordi


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

What's with the Nazi backing kru


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

NEWS: There will be no second referendum, performance


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Finland's entry has everything - banging euro-dance track, over the top dancing from people who are presumably henchmen in their spare time, over-done props and a great singer singing weird lyrics


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

A bit Seal like.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

S☼I said:


> What's with the Nazi backing kru



I thought they looked like androgynous Ghostbusters...


----------



## cyril_smear (May 12, 2018)

How come they are all singing in English?


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Oh yeah bulgarian Wycliffe Jean starts this...


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Bless my daughter. On Finland: "Why's she showing her bits? Nobody is interested in seeing privates"


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Space 1989


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)




----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Oh. here we go


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)




----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

It's the thunderdome gang... Not a bad song but....


----------



## Indeliblelink (May 12, 2018)

Yay for Maldova


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

OMG I have died and gone to Eurovision heaven


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Fucks Bizz!


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Moldova are fucking BRILLIANT this year


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Can't help but feel they should be naked behind the doors/windows...


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

Which door is the car behind again?


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Moldova dancing reminds me of Post-Modern Jukebox.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

This is silly fun...up beat...reminds me of bucks fizz for some reason.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Cheeky as fuck


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Now a touch of Play Without Words.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Ok doing the maths, at one point there was a woman in yellow dancing out front and *two* doors open behind them showing shaved bare legs in heels dancing.

There are only two women so at least one of the male dancers there has shaved legs under those trews and is doubling up


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

It's not fair! All the other countries put out their best talent, but for the UK it's just a joke. Next year: Adele or Radiohead!


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Justin Timberfjord


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

isvicthere? said:


> It's not fair! All the other countries put out their best talent, but for the UK it's just a joke. Next year: Adele or Radiohead!


Blur


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

I have Moldova in front. And without Epic Sax Guy.


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

S☼I said:


> Blur


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Oh gawd... can't cope with the comedy sexy looks to camera


----------



## tommers (May 12, 2018)

isvicthere? said:


> It's not fair! All the other countries put out their best talent, but for the UK it's just a joke. Next year: Adele or Radiohead!


How dare you. Just how dare you. She's a national fucking hero.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

isvicthere? said:


> It's not fair! All the other countries put out their best talent, but for the UK it's just a joke. Next year: Adele or Radiohead!


Sweden's entry this year is a good example of what happens when you take it too seriously though, gotta find that middle ground


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Hungary: FFS!


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

The lead singer is very cute - I'd like to buy him some shoes


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Hungary won't win. Different from the dull pop though


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Nirvaneeeeeerrrrrr


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Magyar metal!


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Yeah Hungary


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

I like them, reminds me of some 80's Peruvian rock I once had on tape.


----------



## poului (May 12, 2018)




----------



## rekil (May 12, 2018)

McBusted on too much lemonade.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

Here we go!


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Yeahhhh I almost wish I had long hair to head band with. 

His throat Hough..busted tomorrow


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Money being piled on Germany.

[/Farage]


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

The best thing about Hungary's entry was watching the rehearsals - they had a little group of 10 people stood at the side of the stage in the empty arena so they could rehearse the mini-stage dive by the guitarist.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Israel is my favourite this year


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Israel's version of Björk?


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> The best thing about Hungary's entry was watching the rehearsals - they had a little group of 10 people stood at the side of the stage in the empty arena so they could rehearse the mini-stage dive by the guitarist.


For sure that wasn't recorded using the guitars they pretended to play


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Imagine having to write the subtitles out for this


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Israel is my favourite this year


It's as clever as it is silly. It works!


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Sounds like she keeps singing "mother-fucking" Bit rude


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Yep. I liked that.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Israel's is brilliant. Predicted this to win on Fb before the thing started


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Sweet Home Alabama!..


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Country rock. Nice. My new favourite.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Bookies have this right... Oz, Israel or Ireland.


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Netherlands: seriously?


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

Nine Bob Note said:


> Sweet Home Alabama!..


Sweet Home Amsterdam


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Netherlands had one almost-win with country music and ever since they've been like "that's the key to winning!" and no, no it's not. It's not worked for them since.

I love the mix of country and crumping though, how the fuck do you crump to country?


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Ah, the Common Linnets. My fave ever Eurovision song, I think*. I even bought it. 

*Possibly "Eighties coming back" by Ruffus


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Bookies have this right... Oz, Israel or Ireland.



Cyprus is the odds-on favourite


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

isvicthere? said:


> Netherlands: seriously?


Yep. It's annoying ly bad.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

ska invita said:


> .


Oh yeah... I forgot about Beyonce.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

Nice little song. Boring after the last few though.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Come on, gays on a parkbench - I've got £90 coming!


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I still hate Ireland's song but the staging is good


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

All these views of Portugal remind me how much I loved it there.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Okay...Ireland has a great song...dancing is a bit over the top but would work in a video. Could win...maybe not fun enough though.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Ah here comes hair-ography


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

Ireland's song - boring as fuck, dancers and staging was proper sweet though.  If that wins the award should go to the choreographer, not the songwriter


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

I really dislike this... It can not win.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

This is far more Shakira than Beyonce. And far crapper than both. Bit disappointed tbh


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I love the spangly cat-suit and the silly synchronised walk-dancing in the middle


----------



## marty21 (May 12, 2018)

It looked like she was lighting her farts


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Cyprus: well, don't let your sex appeal get in the way!


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Cool trews, otherwise unremarkable


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

If it wins Beyonce should collect the prize.


----------



## binka (May 12, 2018)

Israel, Czech, Norway in that order


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Ooh, money shifting onto Israel...


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

S☼I said:


> This is far more Shakira than Beyonce. And far crapper than both. Bit disappointed tbh


Sounded more like a Shakira track but that routine was pretty much 'put a ring on it'


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Germany moving up again - the gamblers didn't like the Cypriot performance...


----------



## isvicthere? (May 12, 2018)

Dr. Furface said:


> Sweet Home Amsterdam



Rotterdam, don't take your love to town.


----------



## weltweit (May 12, 2018)

If I don't vote, the result can't be my fault!


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I like how multicultural it is this year. There's always been lots of "let's send an act that represents *our* culture and history" but this year there's been more "let's incorporate other cultures into our act"

It's almost certainly a cynical ploy to attract votes but the end result is still countries learning about other languages and cultures


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

Epona said:


> Ireland's song - boring as fuck, dancers and staging was proper sweet though.  If that wins the award should go to the choreographer, not the songwriter


For me it's the other way around, sentiment is earnest, his falsetto is pleasant, it's a proper song whilst the dancing is pure stage school. Genuinely like the song tbh


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

My money's on Israel.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Managed to vote for Moldova but the line is engaged for Czech Rep whenever I call


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2018)

That's it for me. First time I've been here for years. I'll be back next year.

For me the stand out ones were Israel, Portugal, Netherlands, Czech, and Moldova. Of these my money is on Israel. It'd be fun if Hungary won though.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

I'd like Moldova or Hungary to win as there was something honest about both... Hmmm..


----------



## Mrs Miggins (May 12, 2018)

Best. Homecoming. Ever 

I love Moldova but it won't win.
Israel's my winner.


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

My 12 points this year go to the presenters


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

My favourites: Czech Republic, Moldova, Hungary, and Israel - with honourable mention for Finland


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

Just realized who Albanian singer reminds me of... The guy from the photoinduction YouTube channel which you probably haven't seen.. Bloke who likes to turn the power up too high on electrical equipment


----------



## magneze (May 12, 2018)

magneze said:


> First two best so far. Flaming Dracula stairs and Slovenian bass.


Oh Spain was actually second. That's how shit it was.

Ok unscientific method but my granddaughter danced to Ukraine, Slovenia, Sweden and Cyprus. Top 4?


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

For my money this is the best pre voting segment of all time

Fuck u Graham Norton


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I always allow myself three votes. I voted for Moldova and Czech Rep, I liked Israel but I didn't really want to vote for it because of the orientalism and I couldn't think who else I wanted to vote for so I just picked Australia as a kind of pity vote.

Then I realised I'd forgotten Hungary  so I voted for them but now I realise I'd really like to vote for Finland too


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

It's annoying me that Israel will probably win as I think there are genuinely better songs.

Portugal really stood out last year..


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Right, I am back LIVE!

Just in time to hear Norton tell everyone to put the kettle on


----------



## The39thStep (May 12, 2018)

France,Edith Piaf must be turning in her grave. Cyprus winners for me. 
The Portuguese in the bar  aren't too impressed with the sketch on their country .


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

If you're going to do a history of Eurovision entries why wouldn't you show the actual entries instead of having actors do it?

Watching a what-the-fuck Eurovision act is fun, watching someone pretend to be a what-the-fuck Eurovision act is pants.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> It's annoying me that Israel will probably win as I think there are genuinely better songs.





red rose said:


> Israel is my favourite this year


I think it's a fun track, but the Chinese stuff was problematic.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Right, I am back LIVE!
> 
> Just in time to hear Norton tell everyone to put the kettle on



wtf, man?


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I think it's a fun track, but the Chinese stuff was problematic.



No, they aren't watching. The Irish gayers saw them off...


----------



## D'wards (May 12, 2018)

I put my money on us coming last. But we might get some sympathy votes now


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

D'wards said:


> I put my money on us coming last. But we might get some sympathy votes now



Didn't know you were performing this year, how do you find time to post here while it's still going on?


----------



## Indeliblelink (May 12, 2018)

> Sobral underwent a successful heart transplant. He left hospital in January 2018, with doctors telling him to "take life quietly" and "keep away from crowds"


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

The39thStep said:


> France,Edith Piaf must be turning in her grave.


Did you catch what the lyrics are about? In think it's quite moving


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

lucky for him he didn't enter this dog of a song last year


----------



## Nine Bob Note (May 12, 2018)

D'wards said:


> I put my money on us coming last. But we might get some sympathy votes now



Found David Davis' account.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Salvador is still a massive stoner.


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

D'wards said:


> I put my money on us coming last. But we might get some sympathy votes now


UK got iirc 115 points last year and I think this year's song was better


----------



## The39thStep (May 12, 2018)

That's set the cat among the pigeons the Portuguese in the bar have now opened up that apart from two people translating they haven't got a clue what's being said all night and that as the event is being held in Lisbon the programme should be in Portuguese with subtitles for non Portuguese speakers . Don't think the translation I gave them helped matters either but the ones who speak English said it was ok. Think the animal documentaries or a film will be on soon .


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Nine Bob Note said:


> wtf, man?


Problems with bad pork meant dinner wasn't ready for the start, so I've been about 40 mins behind all night.


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Did you catch what the lyrics are about? In think it's quite moving



Yes, I did - vomited a little in the back of my mouth


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

I put a few quid on Spain finishing last. Not particularly long odds either.


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

Epona said:


> Yes, I did - vomited a little in the back of my mouth


Fair enough


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Wow! Heart transplant? He deserves to win again. This really is a special song.  I enjoyed last year more. I don't think I'll watch the semis next year.


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Salvador is still a massive stoner.


Portugal: legalise drugs, win the Eurovision song contest


----------



## The39thStep (May 12, 2018)

Apart from 'the money is on the table' in the Falls There is a ghost in my house I don't understand French. Anyway Edith Piaf said it better than me. 


ska invita said:


> Did you catch what the lyrics are about? In think it's quite moving


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

T & P said:


> I put a few quid on Spain finishing last. Not particularly long odds either.


Good call


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Good call


If my country is going to embarrass me I might as well make a few quid out of it.


----------



## The39thStep (May 12, 2018)

Portuguese now in silence listening to the Portuguese singer and the Braziluan one .


----------



## magneze (May 12, 2018)

D'wards said:


> I put my money on us coming last. But we might get some sympathy votes now


Norway last. Terrible, terrible. 

UK better than usual and will get votes for the invasion, which I missed. Top 10?


----------



## BCBlues (May 12, 2018)

Sweden or France for me.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Last year's winner was so bloody good and I haven't ever wanted a song to win more. So different and the guy's voice is astonishing.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I think it's a fun track, but the Chinese stuff was problematic.


Yeah I didn't vote for it in the end despite really enjoying the track.

I did get confused and vote for 5 songs in the end


----------



## D'wards (May 12, 2018)

ska invita said:


> UK got iirc 115 points last year and I think this year's song was better


I dunno, I thought our song was awful. Was watching the Graham Norton show a couple of weeks ago and the musical guest at the end was so atrocious i rightly guessed it was our Eurovision entry. 
I thought that combined with wider Europe having the hump with us over Brexit would lead to a shockingly low total. 
But then again I made it 3 songs in this year before abandoning it. I never make it far.


----------



## The39thStep (May 12, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Portugal: legalise drugs, win the Eurovision song contest


Simple possession for ones own use isn't prosecuted but supply is and any other offences . With those who don't attend treatment it's a court case. I won some money , about 80 euros , in a treble , two football bets on the handicap and Portugal to win the Eurovision this time last year for 5 euros .


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

S☼I said:


> Last year's winner was so bloody good and I haven't ever wanted a song to win more. So different and the guy's voice is astonishing.


I agree this year has left me cold tbh.


----------



## rekil (May 12, 2018)

Pro-tip for France: Nazi salutes don't help.


----------



## mauvais (May 12, 2018)

I heart Eurovision but this year has been toilet. Except for:

(a) Macaulay Culkin/Matt Damon's revival of Fresh Prince dancing, and

(b) That guy from Sweden and his Fonzesque, 'yes, my hand IS down my trousers' move


----------



## Libertad (May 12, 2018)

"I can confirm..."

The game is afoot.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

mauvais said:


> I heart Eurovision but this year has been toilet. Except for:
> 
> (a) Macaulay Culkin/Matt Damon's revival of Fresh Prince dancing, and
> 
> (b) That guy from Sweden and his Fonzesque, 'yes, my hand IS down my trousers' move


Philistine


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

The Belarus White Stripes.


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Great! Scores start coming in. We'll have a result Thursday week at this rate


----------



## Mrs Miggins (May 12, 2018)

12 points to France???


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

mauvais said:


> I heart Eurovision but this year has been toilet. Except for:
> 
> (a) Macaulay Culkin/Matt Damon's revival of Fresh Prince dancing, and
> 
> (b) That guy from Sweden and his Fonzesque, 'yes, my hand IS down my trousers' move


I actually thought it was better this year than in previous years. 

So there.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Awkward satellite delay pauses, talking over each other, weird outfits, monuments in the background and presenters trying to do weird "bits" - the voting announcements are what sustains me for the year. They are deliciously awkward.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

The Dutch Female Bee Gees.


----------



## BCBlues (May 12, 2018)

Mrs Miggins said:


> 12 points to France???



Yeah it's a funky tune why not


----------



## Steel Icarus (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> The Belarus White Stripes.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> The Dutch Female Bee Gees.


How the fuck are you 2 minutes _ahead _of me now?


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> How the fuck are you 2 minutes _ahead _of me now?


I fast forwarded, didn't I?


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Spanish Angelina Jolie.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Oh my god Spain's jacket


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Oh my god no one in Europe cares that you're in Ryslip


----------



## magneze (May 12, 2018)

Exciting voting. Very close.


----------



## mrs quoad (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Oh my god no one in Europe cares that you're in Ryslip


*Ruislip


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Germany doing well...I expected Ireland to get those points.


----------



## Libertad (May 12, 2018)

mrs quoad said:


> *Ruislip



Near Uxbridge.


----------



## tommers (May 12, 2018)

Fuck you Ireland. Hard border.


----------



## mrs quoad (May 12, 2018)

Supine said:


> The incident is here
> 
> 
> 
> I managed to not notice because I was reading urban



Graham is pretty much against protests. 

Apparently stealing someone’s limelight, no matter what your cause, just isn’t what one does. 

Which is a very Eurovision take on things.


----------



## mrs quoad (May 12, 2018)

Libertad said:


> Near Uxbridge.


*Axminster


----------



## skyscraper101 (May 12, 2018)

Iceland, that moment everyone goes “oh look it’s still light there”


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I really did not see Austria doing so well, it's such a bland song and the lyrics are shit.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

No more points for Cyprus please...she seems on the edge of a panic attack and those doe eyes are painful to witness.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> I really did not see Austria doing so well, it's such a bland song and the lyrics are shit.


Same. 

But whyyyyyyyy?!?!?


----------



## Libertad (May 12, 2018)

mrs quoad said:


> *Axminster



Wilton.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> I really did not see Austria doing so well, it's such a bland song and the lyrics are shit.


I thought it was alright.

So there.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Presenter: "There's also the Young Eurovision Song Contest, want to know more about it?"
Graham: No, not really.
*Cuts to a weird postcard with the title Young Eurovision but no actual information for 20 seconds*
*Cuts back to studio*

Utter nonsense


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Norway keeping things interesting, but looks like a two horse race.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Hello Norway


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

skyscraper101 said:


> Iceland, that moment everyone goes “oh look it’s still light there”



Must be doing a late night stocktaking

*coat got*


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Australia looks like he's got his knees up to his chest.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Estonian Jeremy Corbyn.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

I think I will resent Germany winning the least as I didn't expect him to do so well.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Estonia wtf????


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

Norwegian boy is broken 

Ha ha


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Estonian Jeremy Corbyn.


What?


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Norway keeping things interesting, but looks like a two horse race.


The fuck do you know?

Idiot.


----------



## tommers (May 12, 2018)

Quicker we're out of this shitfest the better.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Dear Jury presenters: DO NOT BOTHER WITH JOKES.

 Unless they're about Uxbridge.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Austria and Sweden ahead at this stage? Genuinely surprised.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Get the feeling Austria need a big lead to counter Israel's inevitable surge in the popular vote.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Montenegro's official Eurovision account on Twitter re-tweeted my Justice for Montenegro poster the other day


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Oooh, Russia getting booed.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Montenegro's official Eurovision account on Twitter re-tweeted my Justice for Montenegro poster the other day


Their votes were a massive fuck you to the rest of Europe, think they didn't vote for the top 5 or 6.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

I thought Austria's was decent, but Sweden's song was nothing but nodding.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Every time it cuts to the Austrian entry I hate that tshirt more.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Poland?


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Slovenian Sophie Ellis Bextor.


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Every time it cuts to the Austrian entry I hate that tshirt more.


Even he looks shocked to be doing so well.

Is that his mum next to him? Seems like it.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Slovenian Sophie Ellis Nestor.


Her top on the other hand I absolutely love


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

Portugal, second last ... Ouch


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

As the votes come in I keep letting out an "interestiiiiiiing". My friend just responded "if you care about it".


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I've just noticed how badly Finland are doing and it makes me sad


----------



## Epona (May 12, 2018)

I keep looking at my own scores, and looking at the scoreboard on the telly, and I'm wondering if I was watching a different channel than the judges...


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

INTERESTIIIIIIIIIIIIING.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Even my friend exclaimed "what?!"


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)




----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Israel have got this.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Bye Austria


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Germany have a chance, maybe, but I doubt it.


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Israel have got this.


I still think Cyprus are in the running


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

The jury votes are so off the mark, Ukraine got the 7th highest popular vote and scored almost lowest in the jury vote.


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Bah.

<edit :I don't know the story, just a bit grumpy>


----------



## Vintage Paw (May 12, 2018)

Vintage Paw said:


> Israel is going to win. The opera singer will come second.



*ahem*

From last month. 

I didn’t anticipate the popularity of Cyprus, but I got the winner right.


----------



## binka (May 12, 2018)

The correct winner


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Vintage Paw said:


> *ahem*
> 
> I didn’t anticipate the popularity of Cyprus, but I got the winner right.


I mean, she was the favourite...


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

Who the fuck was voting for Lithuania?!


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> The jury votes are so off the mark, Ukraine got the 7th highest popular vote and scored almost lowest in the jury vote.


Italy also confounded the juries opinions


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

1st called by Vintage Paw I think


----------



## BCBlues (May 12, 2018)

red rose said:


> Who the fuck was voting for Lithuania?!



Putin & Co


----------



## red rose (May 12, 2018)

I looked it up and Salvador Sobral called Netta's song "horrible noise" and said that people had told him that they thought that things in Europe would change after he won Eurovision but that seeing Israel's song as the favourite he thought that nothing had changed.

Which makes him sound like a bit of a narcissistic tool to be honest.

Fun to note that journalists have been asking Netta to comment on his insults this week so she's well aware of what he said, must've felt good accepting the trophy from him.


----------



## DexterTCN (May 12, 2018)




----------



## Plumdaff (May 12, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> 1st called by Vintage Paw I think



Remember Trump and Netanyahu saying Jerusalem is the capital? Next year will be political to put it mildly....

Was absolutely the best song btw


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 12, 2018)

Plumdaff said:


> Remember Trump and Netanyahu saying Jerusalem is the capital? Next year will be political to put it mildly....
> 
> Was absolutely the best song btw


I was wondering how pointed "I love my country, see you in Jerusalem" was.


----------



## ska invita (May 12, 2018)

Supposedly previous Eurovisions in Israel were in Jerusalem.... But "I love my country" was a bit weird


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 12, 2018)

Plumdaff said:


> Remember Trump and Netanyahu saying Jerusalem is the capital? Next year will be political to put it mildly....
> 
> Was absolutely the best song btw


I found her comments odd but then I always cringe at nationalism.


----------



## Vintage Paw (May 12, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I mean, she was the favourite...



I didn’t know that when I first saw her video. My method is a closely guarded secret


----------



## Vintage Paw (May 13, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I was wondering how pointed "I love my country, see you in Jerusalem" was.



Inflammatory, no doubt.


----------



## rekil (May 13, 2018)

red rose said:


> I looked it up and Salvador Sobral called Netta's song "horrible noise" and said that people had told him that they thought that things in Europe would change after he won Eurovision but that seeing Israel's song as the favourite he thought that nothing had changed.
> 
> Which makes him sound like a bit of a narcissistic tool to be honest.
> 
> Fun to note that journalists have been asking Netta to comment on his insults this week so she's well aware of what he said, must've felt good accepting the trophy from him.


If he's upset by that I hope he gets to hear the U75 muso collective effort - Toning Mist.


----------



## The39thStep (May 13, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I mean, she was the favourite...


10-1 before the semis


----------



## rekil (May 13, 2018)

The39thStep said:


> 10-1 before the semis


Maybe earlier, but when I checked before the semis she was favourite, hovering under 2/1, then drifted out a bit. I did not see Austria doing well at all.


----------



## toblerone3 (May 13, 2018)

"Next year in Jerusalem" is an Israeli nationalist/Zionist slogan. Next Year in Jerusalem | My Jewish Learning


----------



## Treacle Toes (May 13, 2018)

toblerone3 said:


> "Next year in Jerusalem" is an Israeli nationalist/Zionist slogan. Next Year in Jerusalem | My Jewish Learning


Uff. Fuck that. It didn't sound good at all without knowing that.


----------



## ska invita (May 13, 2018)

toblerone3 said:


> "Next year in Jerusalem" is an Israeli nationalist/Zionist slogan. Next Year in Jerusalem | My Jewish Learning


Seriously sours it if that's what she meant


----------



## rekil (May 13, 2018)

Little bit politics.



Spoiler


----------



## toblerone3 (May 13, 2018)

ska invita said:


> Seriously sours it if that's what she meant



Probably meant for domestic consumption. Israel must be a seriously schizophrenic country. Don't know what the winner's politics are.


----------



## kittyP (May 13, 2018)

I haven't watched this but this evening has made me feel vaguely disappointed with the younger people of today *shakes old persons fist at the sky*   

The couple who live on the ground floor of this shared house were having quite a politely raucous Eurovision party this evening. They are about 25. 
I was very nicely asked if I would like to join in but declined as it isn't my thing.
They had food and alcohol from all the countries involved and there were about 20 people watching it in the downstairs living-room.  
When I came in from the shops about 10pm it seemed rowdy, but in a good way, and the guests seemed pretty pissed but not over stepping any mark. 
Que what I think was about 10/20 mins after the programme finished (might have been slightly later, I don't know what time it actually ended) and I was having a smoke out of my attic window and could see they were all leaving in an orderly fashion and very quietly decanting in to cabs. 
Like, all together. And I have had a check downstairs and it all seems quiet but I know the hosts are home still. 

I admire their consideration for other people in the house and neighbours but come on, you are 25 years old, pissed and it is barely midnight! 
What are you doing!? 

I really don't think they seemed to be going on elsewhere (although will be willing to stand corrected). 

Everyone else that lives in this house bar me and one other are in their mid 20's and they barely drink, don't smoke, don't really do drugs, are hot yoga/cycling/skateboarding etc enthusiasts. 
I am not saying there is anything wrong with any of that but all together in you mid 20s, makes me a bit sad


----------



## red rose (May 13, 2018)




----------



## MrSki (May 13, 2018)

kittyP said:


> I haven't watched this but this evening has made me feel vaguely disappointed with the younger people of today *shakes old persons fist at the sky*
> 
> The couple who live on the ground floor of this shared house were having quite a politely raucous Eurovision party this evening. They are about 25.
> I was very nicely asked if I would like to join in but declined as it isn't my thing.
> ...


The youth of today. Bloody wasted on them.


----------



## ska invita (May 13, 2018)

kittyP said:


> I haven't watched this but this evening has made me feel vaguely disappointed with the younger people of today *shakes old persons fist at the sky*
> 
> The couple who live on the ground floor of this shared house were having quite a politely raucous Eurovision party this evening. They are about 25.
> I was very nicely asked if I would like to join in but declined as it isn't my thing.
> ...


The clue was in they they were having a sophisticated Eurovision party aged 25.


copliker said:


> Little bit politics.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



http://www.tabletmag.com/scroll/262036/is-israels-eurovision-entry-really-just-a-zionist-anthem


----------



## Lord Camomile (May 13, 2018)

red rose said:


> View attachment 135197


Salamander?!


----------



## kittyP (May 13, 2018)

ska invita said:


> The clue was in they they were having a sophisticated Eurovision party aged 25.
> 
> 
> http://www.tabletmag.com/scroll/262036/is-israels-eurovision-entry-really-just-a-zionist-anthem



I didn't say sophisticated. It wasn't that. I dunno. Just hmmmmmmmmmm


----------



## ska invita (May 13, 2018)

kittyP said:


> I didn't say sophisticated. It wasn't that. I dunno. Just hmmmmmmmmmm


20 foods from different countries - i find that sophisticated!


----------



## kittyP (May 13, 2018)

ska invita said:


> 20 foods from different countries - i find that sophisticated!



I didn't inspect fully, I think it was a rough approximation. And living where we do it is easy to get cheap international food.


----------



## red rose (May 13, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> Salamander?!


Twitter thinks I'd like to see some salamanders I guess...


----------



## Epona (May 13, 2018)

kittyP said:


> I didn't inspect fully, I think it was a rough approximation. And living where we do it is easy to get cheap international food.



Food from 20 countries is quite impressive, I'd have been unable to turn down the invite I think 

I managed a vaguely Portuguese looking fish dish (I honestly have no idea about its authenticity, it tasted good though and was made with a lovely bit of cod so no complaints)


----------



## rekil (May 13, 2018)

Dr. AC, brave disrupter of The Voice, The UK Telly Awards and Eurovision, Proletarian Democracy wishes to approach you in a comradely manner with a special mission in mind.



Spoiler


----------



## krtek a houby (May 13, 2018)

magneze said:


> Norway last. Terrible, terrible.
> 
> UK better than usual and will get votes for the invasion, which I missed. Top 10?



I missed the invasion of the UK, too! Crikey


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## red rose (May 13, 2018)

copliker said:


> Dr. AC, brave disrupter of The Voice, The UK Telly Awards and Eurovision, Proletarian Democracy wishes to approach you in a comradely manner with a special mission in mind.
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler


He`s that bellend that compared ITV`s security to Nazis and likened himself to Eric Garner because they apparently "nearly killed him" when he invaded The Voice.

Edit: Oh look, according to his Twitter account he's got a book coming out that he's publicizing


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## red rose (May 13, 2018)

Although trawling through some of the comments I just... I thought _I_ got worked up about Eurovision


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## cupid_stunt (May 13, 2018)

magneze said:


> Norway last. Terrible, terrible.
> 
> UK better than usual and will get votes for the invasion, which I missed. Top 10?



I was going to ask you for the winning numbers in next week's lottery, I shan't bother now.


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## rekil (May 13, 2018)

red rose said:


> Although trawling through some of the comments I just... I thought _I_ got worked up about Eurovision



It's more likely that she could've finished last without his (objectively heroic) intervention.


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## mrs quoad (May 13, 2018)

I don’t get why she thought there was “no reason” to have another go. 

Added pluck points, I’d have thought. 

I don’t get the calculus that weighs up both sides and settled on no reason.


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## Grump (May 13, 2018)

red rose said:


> Twitter thinks I'd like to see some salamanders I guess...


More likely that it thinks you want to watch the Belgian TV series of that name. It's very good, police thriller based on Belgiums history of deep state organisations running the country.


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## ska invita (May 13, 2018)

Lots of boycott Israel sentiment on my Facebook feed, stuff about her being in a military band (Israel has compulsory military service so this shouldn't be a surprise) and then there's some really ott comments too... By Monday morning this will reach the Labour party i reckon!


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## Epona (May 13, 2018)

red rose said:


> Although trawling through some of the comments I just... I thought _I_ got worked up about Eurovision




That seems like an extraordinarily harsh punishment for someone who jumped on stage, grabbed a microphone and shouted a few words, whilst managing to do no harm to another person.  But then I remember all the fuss around the whole Jarvis Cocker/Michael Jackson thing. (WAS THAT REALLY 22 FUCKING YEARS AGO?  Feeling really old right now.  People who were born after that happened can vote and everything  )


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## Reiabuzz (May 13, 2018)

kittyP said:


> I haven't watched this but this evening has made me feel vaguely disappointed with the younger people of today *shakes old persons fist at the sky*
> 
> The couple who live on the ground floor of this shared house were having quite a politely raucous Eurovision party this evening. They are about 25.
> I was very nicely asked if I would like to join in but declined as it isn't my thing.
> ...



You’ll find this quite terrifying then

Fabric swaps hedonism for meditation


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## Steel Icarus (May 13, 2018)

Lord Camomile said:


> I think it's a fun track, but the Chinese stuff was problematic.


What Chinese stuff? The wall of waving golden cats?


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## Epona (May 13, 2018)

S☼I said:


> What Chinese stuff? The wall of waving golden cats?



Isn't that a Japanese thing?  I have one that was given to me (in England btw, I am an English person and the people who gave it to me were also English) as a leaving present after I was "regretfully" made unemployed, was told very tearfully that the waving arm was to bring money into my life - er no, the best thing for that would have been to have kept my job.


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## Steel Icarus (May 13, 2018)

Epona said:


> Isn't that a Japanese thing?  I have one that was given to me (in England btw, I am an English person and the people who gave it to me were also English as a leaving present after I was "regretfully" made unemployed, was told very tearfully that the waving arm was to bring money into my life - er no, the best thing for that would have been to have kept my job.


Standard Chinese good luck charm in it? Local takeaway has a couple. Might be Japanese as well, seem to remember collecting them in Nintendo's Goemon: Mystical Ninja


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## Epona (May 13, 2018)

Maneki-neko - Wikipedia

- I thought it was this


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## Steel Icarus (May 13, 2018)

Epona said:


> Maneki-neko - Wikipedia
> 
> - I thought it was this


Looks like it. So originally Japanese, also hugely popular in China. The more you know etc


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## Grump (May 13, 2018)

'Next year in Jerusalem' is part of a very old Jewish prayer that was often used as a motto in the concentration camps to hold out some sense of hope. The cultural appropriation issue raised by the waving cats makes me think that, as the World Wide Web was invented by an Englishman then no comments can be made by anyone who isn't an English male. Please confine your fury at White dreadlocks and banjos to Twitter.


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## Epona (May 13, 2018)

Well that escalated quickly... (OK not that quickly, but still)


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## Grump (May 13, 2018)

I do like the waving cats though, might try to get one that waves and plays the banjo. Spell check wants me to say 'waxing cats'.


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## weltweit (May 13, 2018)

Anyone got a link to the Israel entry, I think I was washing my hair when it was on last night


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## gaijingirl (May 13, 2018)

weltweit said:


> Anyone got a link to the Israel entry, I think I was washing my hair when it was on last night



Eurovision 2018: Songs & Videos


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## dessiato (May 13, 2018)

Grump said:


> I do like the waving cats though, might try to get one that waves and plays the banjo. Spell check wants me to say 'waxing cats'.


What are the results? I'd look but am afraid I'll get something inappropriate for looking at in the gym.


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## Grump (May 13, 2018)

dessiato said:


> What are the results? I'd look but am afraid I'll get something inappropriate for looking at in the gym.


The Israel chicken song won. The U.K. Came 3rd from bottom Hank's to sympathy votes from the singer being interrupted.


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## dessiato (May 13, 2018)

Grump said:


> The Israel chicken song won. The U.K. Came 3rd from bottom Hank's to sympathy votes from the singer being interrupted.


The results of looking up cat waxing.


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## donkyboy (May 13, 2018)

impersonating chickens?  and this shit won?


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## Steel Icarus (May 13, 2018)

Still unsure why the Israel performance was problematic


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## girasol (May 13, 2018)

S☼I said:


> Still unsure why the Israel performance was problematic



Something about "cultural appropiation". Except Japan is hardly a minority opressed culture dominated by Israel...

People getting upset she was wearing a Kimono, seriously, wtf? Find something real to get angry about.


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## Treacle Toes (May 13, 2018)

girasol said:


> Something about "cultural appropiation". Except Japan is hardly a minority opressed culture dominated by Israel...
> 
> People getting upset she was wearing a Kimono, seriously, wtf? Find something real to get angry about.



I haven't seen that criticism tbh. 

I have seen the following...

_1. Song about bullying? Oh hello, FREE Palestine.
2. 'I love my country, next year in Jerusalem' - WTF is this Nationalism? _Full disclosure- I felt that too. Nationalism gets my hackles _up._
_3. Diversity? What? Okay she is plus size but privileged all the same so no need to coo.
4. Dog shit song...what happened to real music?
5. Here's a pic of her in the IDF Navy...Fuck Israel.
_
I will wait and see what she does with this platform before I decide.


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## Stanley Edwards (May 13, 2018)

weltweit said:


> Portugal, I didn't realise, wonder if Stanley Edwards is watching?



Watching? I've been sleeping behind the main stage  Well, almost.

Eurovision seems to attract a very particular sort of fanatic. I thought David Icke's gay brother was holding a conference, or something. Glad it is over to be honest. Price of cheap beds more than doubled


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## girasol (May 13, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> I haven't seen that criticism tbh.
> 
> I have seen the following...
> 
> ...



Eurovision 2018 winner Netta has been accused of cultural appropriation

It's nonsense, though.


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## Supine (May 13, 2018)




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## Treacle Toes (May 13, 2018)

girasol said:


> Eurovision 2018 winner Netta has been accused of cultural appropriation
> 
> It's nonsense, though.



Okay. I do see the point being made about Orientalism though...she is an unknown and untrusted artist..People do not know how to understand/interpret her.

what do you think about the other criticisms being discussed?


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## Beats & Pieces (May 14, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Okay. I do see the point being made about Orientalism though...she is an unknown and untrusted artist..People do not know how to understand/interpret her.
> 
> what do you think about the other criticisms being discussed?



I would love to know what you think you mean and understand by way of 'Orientalism'.


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## Mrs Miggins (May 14, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> I haven't seen that criticism tbh.
> 
> I have seen the following...
> 
> ...


A very good friend of mine is upset by the perceived cultural appropriation but I'm struggling with that in this case. Perhaps I don't properly understand it but I thought it was about a person from a dominant culture "stealing" from a minority culture and I don't think that applies in this case.

On the other points:
1. Fair point
2. Agree but she is in a competition representing her country so it's likely she does quite like her country. It doesn't have to be a nationalist statement does it?
3.Yeah I was a bit confused by that. She kept thanking everyone for "choosing different" but wasn't I really sure what the "different" was
4. That's a laughable comment to make about Eurovision
5. Don't all Isrealis have to do National Service?


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## girasol (May 14, 2018)

Rutita1 said:


> Okay. I do see the point being made about Orientalism though...she is an unknown and untrusted artist..People do not know how to understand/interpret her.
> 
> what do you think about the other criticisms being discussed?



not much to be honest, she's an artist who happens to be from Israel, people don't chose where they are born.  Some of it sounds anti-semitic, everyone has to join the army in Israel, no?  Trying to give her that much power/say on the horrendous treatment of Palestinians is ridiculous.   Whether the song is good or not is down to taste, personally it was my favourite.  But all songs in Eurovision are derivative anyway, and I did think 'Bjork' as I watched it.  But I like Bjork.

(agreed on nationalism, I think it's a disease  - but like religion, people are raised to believe it - a lot of people don't even question it! She's only 25, right?)

Also, Bjork wore a Kimono.

NOTE: I actually hate Eurovision   My husband put it on and because we had the little one at home I ended up watching it.


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## girasol (May 14, 2018)

Mrs Miggins said:


> A very good friend of mine is upset by the perceived cultural appropriation but I'm struggling with that in this case. Perhaps I don't properly understand it but I thought it was about a person from a dominant culture "stealing" from a minority culture and I don't think that applies in this case.



It's as if people don't know what cultural appropriation actually means  

Annoys me as much as when people use racism and xenophobia interchangeably as if it meant the same thing.

Like when someone is a dick to someone from Eastern Europe and is then accused of being racist...  When I was told to 'go back to my country' by a gang of black teenagers many years ago I didn't think they were being racist.  I thought they were being xenophobic.


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## Epona (May 14, 2018)

Mrs Miggins said:


> 5. *Don't all Isrealis have to do National Service?*



There are some exceptions but for a large proportion of the population it is compulsory, hence not a reason to judge someone.


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## red rose (May 14, 2018)

Grump said:


> More likely that it thinks you want to watch the Belgian TV series of that name. It's very good, police thriller based on Belgiums history of deep state organisations running the country.


My brother recommended it to me yesterday too, I've added it to my to-watch list, thanks!


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## red rose (May 14, 2018)

Epona said:


> That seems like an extraordinarily harsh punishment for someone who jumped on stage, grabbed a microphone and shouted a few words, whilst managing to do no harm to another person.  But then I remember all the fuss around the whole Jarvis Cocker/Michael Jackson thing. (WAS THAT REALLY 22 FUCKING YEARS AGO?  Feeling really old right now.  People who were born after that happened can vote and everything  )


I called him on it and he doubled down 




			
				Twitter Fuckwit said:
			
		

> He's a fucking cunt.  I hope he doesn't leave Portugese custody for a long time.  Forget handing him over Portugal, our cops will just slap his wrist.


But now he's advocating for the UK to not compete next year because "Europe needs to miss us" and is tweeting at James Blunt asking him to compete in Eurovision for us  

Honestly I think we probably got more votes because of the stage invasion than we would have otherwise.


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## Grump (May 15, 2018)

red rose said:


> My brother recommended it to me yesterday too, I've added it to my to-watch list, thanks!


Will make more sense if you watch series 1 first rather than the one that has just finished (2).


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## 1927 (May 15, 2018)

Israel isn't even in Europe so fuck em, everyone voted for them because they thought in some perverse way not doing so was anti-semitic.


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## Mrs Miggins (May 16, 2018)

1927 said:


> ... everyone voted for them because they thought in some perverse way not doing so was anti-semitic.


Don't be ridiculous. If that was true they'd win every year.


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## 1927 (May 16, 2018)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Don't be ridiculous. If that was true they'd win every year.


Its more fashionable this year tho!


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## Mrs Miggins (May 16, 2018)

1927 said:


> Its more fashionable this year tho!


Is it? Why?


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## rekil (May 16, 2018)

copliker said:


> Spoiler



In the name of her majesty the queen, send Dr. AC to Jerusalem.



Spoiler










> Please allow me to drink
> A cup of tea
> And let me explain
> With philosophy


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## Mrs Miggins (May 16, 2018)

What a prick


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## rekil (May 16, 2018)

The right prick for the job.


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