# Inside Claridges



## AverageJoe (Dec 3, 2012)

On now, BBC2

Anyone fancy staying in a £7000 a night suite?

Interesting array of assorted diva guests and "ooh, I am on telly" staff


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 3, 2012)

Yeah, pretty interesting so far.  The guy answering the phone is pretty amusing


----------



## winterinmoscow (Dec 3, 2012)

My goodness this really is another world!!!


----------



## oryx (Dec 3, 2012)

I thought this should be renamed 'The First World Problems Show'.....


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 3, 2012)

AverageJoe said:


> Interesting array of assorted diva guests and "ooh, I am on telly" staff


 
Yeah, this was a good programme. The Claridges staff all seemed really likeable, particularly the butler and the telephone guy who looked like Moby. The artist in residence seems to have a total scoosh of a job! Not sure about some of the guests, but the old American couple seemed very sweet, and the 81-year-old model


----------



## lizzieloo (Dec 3, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Yeah, this was a good programme. The Claridges staff all seemed really likeable, particularly the butler and the telephone guy who looked like Moby. The artist in residence seems to have a total scoosh of a job! Not sure about some of the guests, but the old American couple seemed very sweet, and the 81-year-old model


 
What were they called? I was trying to google them. Melker or something.......?


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 3, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Not sure about some of the guests, but the old American couple seemed very sweet


Yeah, was sad when it said that was their last visit 

ETA, I wonder if Gordon Ramsay will make an appearance? They weren't fans


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 3, 2012)

lizzieloo said:


> What were they called? I was trying to google them. Melker or something.......?


 
Jack and Norma Melchor

http://www.computerhistory.org/events/lectures/osborne_03252004/bios/Melchor.shtml


----------



## lizzieloo (Dec 3, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Jack and Norma Melchor
> 
> http://www.computerhistory.org/events/lectures/osborne_03252004/bios/Melchor.shtml


 
Thanks


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 3, 2012)

lizzieloo said:


> Thanks


 
Looking around, it looks like he was running the part of Hewlett Packard that first started making computers in the 1960s. Not hard to see why they could afford Claridges to be honest


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 3, 2012)

http://www.losaltosonline.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1773&Itemid=109


----------



## lizzieloo (Dec 3, 2012)

He has one of those faces


----------



## spliff (Dec 3, 2012)

neonwilderness said:


> http://www.losaltosonline.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1773&Itemid=109


Just finished reading that and was gonna post it. 

Interesting couple. They only went out twice during their 15 day stay, I wonder where they went.


----------



## lizzieloo (Dec 3, 2012)

spliff said:


> Just finished reading that and was gonna post it.
> 
> Interesting couple. They only went out twice during their 15 day stay, I wonder where they went.


 
Out to score I expect


----------



## spliff (Dec 3, 2012)

'Dear Edge' or 'Dear The Edge'  what a quandary.


----------



## Gingerman (Dec 4, 2012)

spliff said:


> 'Dear Edge' or 'Dear The Edge' what a quandary.


 Dear 'Tax dodging stupid hat wearing cunt' ?


----------



## mentalchik (Dec 4, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Looking around, it looks like he was running the part of Hewlett Packard that first started making computers in the 1960s. Not hard to see why they could afford Claridges to be honest


 
They also said she had a 'few' shares in google from it's early beginnings..........

i went from fascination through to anger watching this prog.............enjoyed it though !


----------



## Shirl (Dec 4, 2012)

I was expecting to hate everything about this program but I loved all of it 
I had said earlier in the program when they were preparing the suite for the old couple, that if I was staying there I wouldn't want to go out


----------



## Schmetterling (Dec 4, 2012)

I just caught bits during Yotam Ottolenghi's advert breaks but liked it.  Probably did not see enough to become irritated. I did see the 81-year-old model and thought she looked fantastic.  Obviously had work done to her face but I thought it was done well.  I want to be her when I am 81!!!!!


----------



## Gingerman (Dec 4, 2012)

Schmetterling said:


> I just caught bits during Yotam Ottolenghi's advert breaks but liked it. Probably did not see enough to become irritated. I did see the 81-year-old model and thought she looked fantastic. Obviously had work done to her face but I thought it was done well. I want to be her when I am 81!!!!!









Her name is Carmen Dell'Orefice and I agree she looks fab for 81.


----------



## Gingerman (Dec 4, 2012)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-15119886
Did'nt know Claridges was owned by those pair of tax dodgers the Barclay brothers.


----------



## yield (Dec 4, 2012)

winterinmoscow said:


> My goodness this really is another world!!!


The exclusive american travel agents with the $100,000 sign up fee and $25,000 yearly subs.

Silly money.


----------



## twentythreedom (Dec 4, 2012)

Lift Man seemed like a fairly satisfied chap


----------



## Gingerman (Dec 4, 2012)

twentythreedom said:


> Lift Man seemed like a fairly satisfied chap


 So did the Irish butler.


----------



## maldwyn (Dec 4, 2012)

I too was expecting to hate it, but could see a certain charm in the staff - I hate to be fussed over so would find it impossible to stay there.

Pity we didn't get to see the japanese Britney


----------



## wiskey (Dec 4, 2012)

The manager reminds me of John Barrowman and this is annoying me


----------



## Manter (Dec 4, 2012)

Gingerman said:


> Her name is Carmen Dell'Orefice and I agree she looks fab for 81.


She's stunning for any age.


----------



## fogbat (Dec 4, 2012)

Dell'Orifice


----------



## wiskey (Dec 4, 2012)

I quite enjoyed watching that, I wouldn't like to stay there though. Last year we were on an £85m yacht with a staff of nearly 30 and tbh it was awful, I was handed a drink I didn't know what to do with and I carried the empty glass about for ages instead of making a ring mark on the polished mahogany


----------



## Manter (Dec 4, 2012)

wiskey said:


> I quite enjoyed watching that, I wouldn't like to stay there though. Last year we were on an £85m yacht with a staff of nearly 30 and tbh it was awful, I was handed a drink I didn't know what to do with and I carried the empty glass about for ages instead of making a ring mark on the polished mahogany


na, whack it down, its up to the staff to sort it


----------



## wiskey (Dec 4, 2012)

It was creepy though, literally before you thought something there was a member of staff there with whatever your half formed thought was thinking you might want.

At one point I went down a deck and caught some staff unawares and instantly they morphed into non people, just blended in with the background unless I wanted them.

As much as I'd like them sometimes I am not designed to have servants . . .

ETA: @Manter here you go have a look http://www.superyachttimes.com/yachts/details/606


----------



## Nine Bob Note (Dec 4, 2012)

DS firmly believes that were Matt Lucas and David Walliams to do a spoof, it would be exactly the same...


----------



## Manter (Dec 4, 2012)

wiskey said:


> It was creepy though, literally before you thought something there was a member of staff there with whatever your half formed thought was thinking you might want.
> 
> At one point I went down a deck and caught some staff unawares and instantly they morphed into non people, just blended in with the background unless I wanted them.
> 
> ...


looks swanky.  Tho slightly lost in all the specifications.

I know what you mean- I was in a bar like that with work, and for about an hour if was fun, then it started to freak me out.  I'd start to think 'ooh, I want a glass of water' and it would be in front of you.  You'd think "different cocktail perhaps", and the menu would be in your hand, with someone murmuring (spelling?) in your ear about your favourite spirit....


----------



## wiskey (Dec 4, 2012)

I changed the link to one with more photos. The stupid thing is it only sleeps 12 guests and about 25 crew.

I guess as the guy on the Claridges prog said 'if you can spend £10k flying to NY it's all relative'.


----------



## Manter (Dec 4, 2012)

wiskey said:


> I changed the link to one with more photos. The stupid thing is it only sleeps 12 guests and about 25 crew.
> 
> I guess as the guy on the Claridges prog said 'if you can spend £10k flying to NY it's all relative'.


 its nice, should I ever find myself in need of a yacht....

I know they can, but do they needto?  Barking,


----------



## Schmetterling (Dec 5, 2012)

wiskey said:


> I quite enjoyed watching that, I wouldn't like to stay there though. Last year we were on an £85m yacht with a staff of nearly 30 and tbh it was awful, I was handed a drink I didn't know what to do with and I carried the empty glass about for ages instead of making a ring mark on the polished mahogany


Do you think if you had chucked it over the sides there would have been a) someone in the water expecting it or b) someone would have jumped after it to retrieve it?


----------



## maldwyn (Dec 5, 2012)

The story about the diver attaching fish to the end of a line sounded too far fetched to me.


----------



## Firky (Dec 5, 2012)

Caught up with this on iPlayer, was very interesting.

I am going to demand that Lenny Henry is my butler at the Holiday Inn.

The eldery couple were really quite down to earth though. I think that is the differenec, they made their money over a lifetime rather than be born into it or be born with blue blood.


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 5, 2012)

firky said:


> I am going to demand that Lenny Henry is my butler at the Holiday Inn.


After they fit a jacuzzi and redecorate a room to your liking?


----------



## spanglechick (Dec 5, 2012)

We stayed in claridges when grinder proposed.  Not in a super suite or anything, but it was very nice and the same sort of money as a weekend break in Paris or something.  And an amazing experience.  

Staff were lovely and friendly but we didn't see much more of them than you would at a travelodge. Certainly not omnipresent at all.  

But a small tub of Pringles in the mini bar was a fiver!


----------



## Firky (Dec 5, 2012)

neonwilderness said:


> After they fit a jacuzzi and redecorate a room to your liking?


 
God I was so annoyed I never got to see that Japanese pop princess 

The mental pictures I had...


----------



## maldwyn (Dec 5, 2012)

firky said:


> The eldery couple were really quite down to earth though. I think that is the differenec, they made their money over a lifetime rather than be born into it or be born with blue blood.


Didn't she say she bought shares in Google?  It was sad to hear she had died.


----------



## Firky (Dec 5, 2012)

She did, yeah! 

If I make it to my 80s and I'm super rich I am not going to Weston Super-Mare for my holidays either


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 10, 2012)

I've just found the phone guy's twitter account


----------



## Firky (Dec 10, 2012)

tell me!! 

he wouldn't fall to australian tricks


----------



## Nine Bob Note (Dec 10, 2012)

Oh, fuck off, pretendy royals. You ain't the king of shit


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 10, 2012)

firky said:


> tell me!!
> 
> he wouldn't fall to australian tricks


Google his name


----------



## marty21 (Dec 10, 2012)

spanglechick said:


> We stayed in claridges when grinder proposed. Not in a super suite or anything, but it was very nice and the same sort of money as a weekend break in Paris or something. And an amazing experience.
> 
> Staff were lovely and friendly but we didn't see much more of them than you would at a travelodge. Certainly not omnipresent at all.
> 
> But a small tub of Pringles in the mini bar was a fiver!


that is a classy proposal


----------



## purenarcotic (Dec 10, 2012)

I won't lie, I'd fucking love to be able to afford to go for posh breakfast somewhere nice on a regular basis.


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 10, 2012)

Someone should tell him not to speak while eating, although given his history maybe that's why he gets away with it


----------



## Firky (Dec 10, 2012)

neonwilderness said:


> Google his name


 
I only know him as "phone gadgie"


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 10, 2012)

firky said:


> I only know him as "phone gadgie"


Timothy Lock might be able to help you


----------



## QueenOfGoths (Dec 10, 2012)

Phone man scares me. Is he real or animatronic!?


----------



## Firky (Dec 10, 2012)

QueenOfGoths said:


> Phone man scares me. Is he real or animatronic!?



I bet he wanted a job as a butler...


----------



## Firky (Dec 10, 2012)

neonwilderness said:


> Timothy Lock might be able to help you


 
Not what I imagined 

Had to check teh photo haha


----------



## DexterTCN (Dec 10, 2012)

Gingerman said:


> Her name is Carmen Dell'Orefice and I agree she looks fab for 81.


A weird cross between Cruella deVille and Pussy Galore.


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 10, 2012)

Gerry Parker. "retired bookmaker"


----------



## Gingerman (Dec 11, 2012)

How do you get a job testing out hotel rooms? I could totally do that


----------



## Cid (Dec 11, 2012)

wiskey said:


> I quite enjoyed watching that, I wouldn't like to stay there though. Last year we were on an £85m yacht with a staff of nearly 30 and tbh it was awful, I was handed a drink I didn't know what to do with and I carried the empty glass about for ages instead of making a ring mark on the polished mahogany


 
It'll be some bloody hardcore lacquer, has to deal with sea water after all.


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 11, 2012)

firky said:


> Not what I imagined
> 
> Had to check teh photo haha


 
Heh, you got a reply from him. Seems like a nice guy.


----------



## Firky (Dec 11, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Heh, you got a reply from him. Seems like a nice guy.


 
Ha!


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Heh, you got a reply from him. Seems like a nice guy.


Thanks!  I always try to be nice, and yes I'm real not animatronic....although I've always wanted to work on The Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disney so you never know....


----------



## Firky (Dec 11, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Thanks! I always try to be nice, and yes I'm real not animatronic....although I've always wanted to work on The Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disney so you never know....


 

TIMOTHY!!!  

Welcome!!


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 11, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Thanks! I always try to be nice, and yes I'm real not animatronic....although I've always wanted to work on The Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disney so you never know....


 
Hahaha awesome. Welcome to Urban Timothy.


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Hahaha awesome. Welcome to Urban Timothy.


Thanks!  Glad you guys are enjoying the show.


----------



## fen_boy (Dec 11, 2012)

Is that Jedward with you in your Avatar?


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 11, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Thanks! I always try to be nice, and yes I'm real not animatronic....although I've always wanted to work on The *Pirates of the Caribbean* ride at Disney so you never know....


Maybe you could suggest that as a theme for the hotel foyer next Christmas


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 11, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Thanks! Glad you guys are enjoying the show.


 
It's a fascinating window into a strange world. Is it just one more to go?


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

fen_boy said:


> Is that Jedward with you in your Avatar?


it is indeed Jedward!  I do get up to some adventures. Lol


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> It's a fascinating window into a strange world. Is it just one more to go?


Yes, the last episode is on this coming Monday night.


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

neonwilderness said:


> Maybe you could suggest that as a theme for the hotel foyer next Christmas


Not a bad idea ;-)


----------



## gabi (Dec 11, 2012)

Interesting series, but personally I'd rather stay at the Grosvenor


----------



## Firky (Dec 11, 2012)

How did you find us, Tim?


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

firky said:


> How did you find us, Tim?


I was quoted in a Daily Mail article today, so I was curious to see where else I was referenced in regards to the show.  If you saw episode 1, most of my answers come from google, so a quick search found my name mentioned in this forum


----------



## Firky (Dec 11, 2012)

You poor thing, quoted in the Daily Mail


----------



## susie12 (Dec 11, 2012)

Welcome Timothy! I'm loving the Claridges programme and you come across as really good at your job.


----------



## gabi (Dec 11, 2012)

Are you on duty at the moment Tim?


----------



## Pingu (Dec 11, 2012)

no one has offered him a hob nob yet... poor show urban...


btw tim dont lend dub a fiver


----------



## Shirl (Dec 11, 2012)

I want to be in your fan club Timothy. 
..and yes, welcome to urban and don't lend dub a fiver, but you've already been told that


----------



## mrsfran (Dec 11, 2012)

Ha! Brilliant! Timothy's here! Welcome! 

Please PLEASE record yourself saying "Hello and welcome to Urban75, how may I help you?"


----------



## QueenOfGoths (Dec 11, 2012)

Can I just say that these (created for Gordon Ramsey's restaurant at Claridges) are the MOST DELICIOUS CHOCOLATE EVER. Fact!!

If you don't get them as a Christmas perk, Timothy, demand them


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

gabi said:


> Are you on duty at the moment Tim?


I'm actually off until the 18th, but got a text from one of my staff this morning saying that callers (or as she called them my "groupies") have been upset that they haven't got me on the phone when they call. Lol


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

QueenOfGoths said:


> Can I just say that these (created for Gordon Ramsey's restaurant at Claridges) are the MOST DELICIOUS CHOCOLATE EVER. Fact!!
> 
> If you don't get them as a Christmas perk, Timothy, demand them


Yum!  I think these may have to enter into my next contract negotiation! hahahaha!


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 11, 2012)

timothylock said:


> I'm actually off until the 18th, but got a text from one of my staff this morning saying that callers (or as she called them my "groupies") have been upset that they haven't got me on the phone when they call. Lol


I called especially with my Arnold Schwarzenegger soundboard too


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

neonwilderness said:


> I called especially with my Arnold Schwarzenegger soundboard too


Hahahaha!  Apparently that's happened quite a few times!!


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

neonwilderness said:


> I called especially with my Arnold Schwarzenegger soundboard too


Hahahaha!  Apparently that's happened quite a few times!!


----------



## Corax (Dec 11, 2012)

Twenty minutes in and some bits have made me stupidly angry.  FFS.


----------



## quimcunx (Dec 11, 2012)

What channel? 

Also for timothy, well for mrs fran

http://vocaroo.com/


/\  voice recorder.


----------



## miss direct (Dec 11, 2012)

This lady has had a very interesting life!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carmen_Dell'Orefice
I love that Timothy is posting here 
Is there afternoon tea at Claridges?


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 11, 2012)

quimcunx said:


> What channel?


http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b01p7nd3/Inside_Claridges_Episode_1/
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b01pc3gk/Inside_Claridges_Episode_2/


----------



## purenarcotic (Dec 11, 2012)

Timothy!  How cool, welcome!


----------



## mrsfran (Dec 11, 2012)

miss direct said:


> Is there afternoon tea at Claridges?


 
Yes, the last episode talked a lot about it. I hope the next episode shows us the kitchens a bit more.

What I'm interested in is how much Claridges pay their staff - the waiters and the cleaning staff. I wonder if it's any more than a cleaner at a Travelodge?


----------



## miss direct (Dec 11, 2012)

Thanks  I only just watched part of the first episode on iplayer as a result of this thread. 
I'm fond of a bit of luxury and afternoon tea is one of my favourite things to do when I visit the UK.


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

Here's the welcome...lol


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 11, 2012)

Excellent


----------



## mrsfran (Dec 11, 2012)

AMAZING 

Thanks Timothy! Made my day!


----------



## Firky (Dec 11, 2012)

Brilliant


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 11, 2012)

Timothy, I'm delighted to welcome you here. I'd like to say what I said to the TV last night, though. You said "...if I can genderise Claridges as 'her'". You may, of course, call Claridges 'her' if you wish, but I'd really rather you didn't say "genderise", especially not in my living room. Thank you.


----------



## Mrs Magpie (Dec 11, 2012)

gabi said:


> Interesting series, but personally I'd rather stay at the Grosvenor


I spent the first night of our honeymoon in the Grosvenor. The bed was awful, the springs had gone in the middle leaving a saggy mattress and the champagne was warm and we wished we'd stayed in our own bed overnight and set off for France from Brixton rather than from the Grosvenor. Would have been a nicer breakfast and all


----------



## Corax (Dec 11, 2012)

The two little girls at 46:30 of episode one...


> I absolutely love this place.  It's so art deco.


Kill them before they grow up into monsters.


----------



## wiskey (Dec 11, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Here's the welcome...lol




excellent work


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

danny la rouge said:


> Timothy, I'm delighted to welcome you here. I'd like to say what I said to the TV last night, though. You said "...if I can genderise Claridges as 'her'". You may, of course, call Claridges 'her' if you wish, but I'd really rather you didn't say "genderise", especially not in my living room. Thank you.


it was a toss up between 'genderise' and 'tenderise' Lol


----------



## Kidda (Dec 11, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Here's the welcome...lol




Pure genius. You can stay  

Would you like a hob nob or a custard cream?


----------



## timothylock (Dec 11, 2012)

Kidda said:


> Pure genius. You can stay
> 
> Would you like a hob nob or a custard cream?


Custard Cream please! ;-)


----------



## quimcunx (Dec 11, 2012)

You can be our man on the inside.  

I've watched episode 1 and 2 now.  Quite interesting.  I have not got the attention to detail required to work at Claridges.


----------



## Minnie_the_Minx (Dec 11, 2012)

£50 for champagne afternoon tea is a bit steep though.  You'd think they'd leave the crusts on your sarnies for that price 

Did that family get a discount as a family member used to work there?


----------



## spanglechick (Dec 11, 2012)

Minnie_the_Minx said:


> £50 for champagne afternoon tea is a bit steep though. You'd think they'd leave the crusts on your sarnies for that price
> 
> Did that family get a discount as a family member used to work there?


that's not unusual for a champagne afternoon tea.  top end, but not by far.

and all the best places just keep bringing more little cakes and things until you explode, or discover the manners to say no...


----------



## Minnie_the_Minx (Dec 11, 2012)

spanglechick said:


> that's not unusual for a champagne afternoon tea. top end, but not by far.
> 
> and all the best places just keep bringing more little cakes and things until you explode, or discover the manners to say no...


 
Yeah, I know.  Was only joking

Mind you, if they did bring me a load of cucumber sandwiches, I'd have to be having words as cucumber makes me gag 

The cakes wouldn't be a problem though


----------



## susie12 (Dec 12, 2012)

I thought the sandwiches looked rather tasty!  But so they should be at 50 quid a go


----------



## Minnie_the_Minx (Dec 12, 2012)

susie12 said:


> I thought the sandwiches looked rather tasty! But so they should be at 50 quid a go


 
I didn't actually notice what was in them, but if it was salmon or cucumber, I'm not interested. They'll have to find something better to tempt me

You can get a cheaper afternoon tea if you leave out the champagne though


----------



## susie12 (Dec 12, 2012)

I liked the way they sliced them in kind of layers, very pretty.  The cakes looked good too.  However I don't feel my wardrobe is up to Claridges' standards so it would be an even more expensive event.


----------



## Minnie_the_Minx (Dec 12, 2012)

susie12 said:


> I liked the way they sliced them in kind of layers, very pretty. The cakes looked good too. However I don't feel my wardrobe is up to Claridges' standards so it would be an even more expensive event.


 

They only said no sportswear or baseball caps

I'm sure they also mentioned casual (and elegant), so I'm sure going naked wouldn't be a problem


----------



## susie12 (Dec 12, 2012)




----------



## quimcunx (Dec 12, 2012)

Minnie_the_Minx said:


> I'm sure they also mentioned casual (and elegant), so I'm sure going naked wouldn't be a problem


 
I look neither casual nor elegant naked.


----------



## susie12 (Dec 12, 2012)

Not a good idea with all those pots of scalding tea being carried around either.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 12, 2012)

spanglechick said:


> all the best places just keep bringing more little cakes and things until you explode, or discover the manners to say no...


That sounds like my kind of afternoon.


----------



## marty21 (Dec 12, 2012)

Minnie_the_Minx said:


> £50 for champagne afternoon tea is a bit steep though. You'd think they'd leave the crusts on your sarnies for that price
> 
> Did that family get a discount as a family member used to work there?


it is fairly normal for a top end afternoon tea - best I've had so far is Browns in Mayfair - they keep bringing sarnies until you can't move - and  then bring the cakes out  tempted to try the Claridges one tbh


----------



## marty21 (Dec 12, 2012)

spanglechick said:


> that's not unusual for a champagne afternoon tea. top end, but not by far.
> 
> and all the best places just keep bringing more little cakes and things until you explode, or discover the manners to say no...


yep - Have you tried Browns? it is a most excellent afternoon tea - no offence timothy


----------



## spanglechick (Dec 12, 2012)

marty21 said:


> yep - Have you tried Browns? it is a most excellent afternoon tea - no offence timothy


No, but have had a few others.  I love afternoon tea.  Tiny sandwiches and small cakes.  Also, usually scones with jam and cream...  And champagne! (I don't actually like tea so I neeeeeed champagne).


----------



## marty21 (Dec 12, 2012)

spanglechick said:


> No, but have had a few others. I love afternoon tea. Tiny sandwiches and small cakes. Also, usually scones with jam and cream... And champagne! (I don't actually like tea so I neeeeeed champagne).


I like tea! At Browns they give you a little bag of the loose tea you had when you leave, which is a nice touch.


----------



## purenarcotic (Dec 12, 2012)

Tea at the Wolsley is pretty decent.  And a stunning building to eat in.


----------



## mrsfran (Dec 12, 2012)

But tea at Oliver Peyton's National Gallery Restaurant is not so great. Slow service, not a huge amount for your money.


----------



## cesare (Dec 12, 2012)

purenarcotic said:


> Tea at the Wolsley is pretty decent.  And a stunning building to eat in.


I was just about to mention that one. Some friends came over from Sweden and top of their wish list was English Afternoon Tea, so that's where we went. About £25 iirc, which wasn't bad considering venue etc. and it was lovely. Sorry Timothy, but welcome!


----------



## miss direct (Dec 12, 2012)

As a result of this programme, and this thread, I've decided to treat a friend of mine to afternoon tea for her 30th birthday...I'd love to take her to Claridges but it has to be somewhere in Birmingham...so not quite so posh.


----------



## scifisam (Dec 12, 2012)

marty21 said:


> I like tea! At Browns they give you a little bag of the loose tea you had when you leave, which is a nice touch.


 
At Claridge's they give you a pretty little tin of their tea, too. My GF took me there for my birthday; I don't think the non-champagne version was actually that bad value. Brilliant service and, when they overheard that it was my birthday, they brought me out a little birthday cake.


----------



## Minnie_the_Minx (Dec 12, 2012)

scifisam said:


> they brought me out a little birthday cake.


 
How little?


----------



## marty21 (Dec 12, 2012)

scifisam said:


> At Claridge's they give you a pretty little tin of their tea, too. My GF took me there for my birthday; I don't think the non-champagne version was actually that bad value. Brilliant service and, when they overheard that it was my birthday, they brought me out a little birthday cake.


That sounds good - I think we may have to try that out - guess I have to smarten up a bit ?


----------



## scifisam (Dec 12, 2012)

Minnie_the_Minx said:


> How little?


 
Quite little, but more than enough with all the other cakes.


----------



## miss direct (Dec 12, 2012)

oooh that looks lovely! So do you.


----------



## Minnie_the_Minx (Dec 12, 2012)

scifisam said:


> Quite little, but more than enough with all the other cakes.


 
and it is very pretty


----------



## scifisam (Dec 12, 2012)

marty21 said:


> That sounds good - I think we may have to try that out - guess I have to smarten up a bit ?


 
Disappointingly, a lot of the people there were quite dressed down.  Maybe avoid trainers and tracksuits, but it's not like you dress like a teenage hoodlum anyway.


----------



## cesare (Dec 12, 2012)

scifisam said:


> Quite little, but more than enough with all the other cakes.


That's a lovely photo


----------



## purenarcotic (Dec 12, 2012)

miss direct said:


> As a result of this programme, and this thread, I've decided to treat a friend of mine to afternoon tea for her 30th birthday...I'd love to take her to Claridges but it has to be somewhere in Birmingham...so not quite so posh.


 
I can't think of anywhere here that would do a nice afternoon tea.  Somewhere in the Mailbox maybe. Browns next to the Bullring is probably the best.


----------



## miss direct (Dec 12, 2012)

Thanks...I've had afternoon tea at Hotel Du Vin before, that was nice...great cocktails too, but it was in a conservatory and was a little cold.


----------



## purenarcotic (Dec 12, 2012)

The cocktails at Browns are rather excellent.


----------



## marty21 (Dec 12, 2012)

scifisam said:


> Disappointingly, a lot of the people there were quite dressed down.  Maybe avoid trainers and tracksuits, but it's not like you dress like a teenage hoodlum anyway.


I might get my linen suit out when it warms up a bit


----------



## gabi (Dec 12, 2012)

i've usually found that the posher the place the sloppier you can dress, ironically...


----------



## mrsfran (Dec 12, 2012)

gabi said:


> i've usually found that the posher the place the sloppier you can dress, ironically...


 
Yes, I often feel out of place at a McDonalds unless I have a ballgown on.


----------



## cesare (Dec 12, 2012)

gabi said:


> i've usually found that the posher the place the sloppier you can dress, ironically...


That's cos they're probably all trained along the lines of rich people are happy dressing casually and quite comfortable popping into Claridges for tea on a whim. Is that right, Timothy?


----------



## Citizen66 (Dec 12, 2012)

Wasn't Mick Jagger in permanent residence there at one point?


----------



## ijgolding (Dec 17, 2012)

I have written a blog on what we can all learn from Claridges for anyone that is interested - http://ijgolding.wordpress.com/2012/12/11/2160-a-night-what-can-we-learn-from-claridges/


----------



## stethoscope (Dec 17, 2012)

ijgolding said:


> I have written a blog on what we can all learn from Claridges for anyone that is interested - http:/ijgolding.stop.spamming.urban.with.your.consultancy.business.com


 
Here's some customer experience advice, fuck off with your spam.


----------



## editor (Dec 17, 2012)

purenarcotic said:


> Tea at the Wolsley is pretty decent. And a stunning building to eat in.


I went as a birthday treat once and enjoyed it.







http://www.urban75.org/blog/afternoon-tea-at-the-wolseley-piccadilly-london/


----------



## editor (Dec 17, 2012)

steph said:


> Here's some customer experience advice, fuck off with your spam.


He does do fantastic business bullshit-speak though: 


> Ian was responsible for building and embedding the customer experience strategy for all retail brands within the SDG portfolio in the UK.
> 
> Through the implementation of innovative measurement methodologies such as the OMI (operational measures index) and proving it’s link to customer satisfaction measurement through the CSI (customer satisfaction index), Ian spent over 6 years helping SDG to align improvement in the customer journey to customer experience strategies that benefit the customer, employee and shareholder.


----------



## ddraig (Dec 17, 2012)

ijgolding said:


> I have written a blog on what we can all learn from Claridges for anyone that is interested - http://ijgolding.wordpress.com/2012/12/11/2160-a-night-what-can-we-learn-from-claridges/


 pissoff you smug twat


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 17, 2012)

Last episode tonight, seems a shame they've only done three episodes if they were filming for a year.  I wonder if we'll see @timothylock again?


----------



## Schmetterling (Dec 17, 2012)

Has anyone said yet:
Timothy is in for such a surprise! *snigger*


----------



## ijgolding (Dec 17, 2012)

steph said:


> Here's some customer experience advice, fuck off with your spam.


 I posted here as your readers may have been interested in the content of the specific blog - it was never intended to solicit for business. If you would like me to remove the post, I will happily do so. I apologise if I have offended you or any other readers of this site.


----------



## cesare (Dec 17, 2012)

ijgolding said:


> I posted here as your readers may have been interested in the content of the specific blog - it was never intended to solicit for business. If you would like me to remove the post, I will happily do so. I apologise if I have offended you or any other readers of this site.


That's very polite of you.


----------



## Pingu (Dec 17, 2012)

ddraig said:


> pissoff you smug twat


 

ahh the more traditional urban welcome


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 17, 2012)

Chicken burger and chips for breakfast?


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 17, 2012)

Ants. Hmmmm.


----------



## wtfftw (Dec 17, 2012)

Noma!


----------



## fen_boy (Dec 17, 2012)

You never see timothy lock and dodgepot in the same room.


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Dec 17, 2012)

Did that American bride really say that one of her wonderful new experiences was eating leeks?


----------



## timothylock (Dec 17, 2012)

fen_boy said:


> You never see timothy lock and dodgepot in the same room.


I can now confirm that I am not dodgepot!!  Btw, thank you all for your very kind words and comments during this series.  Remember, whenever you eat lamb make sure......NO WOOL!!! xxx


----------



## timothylock (Dec 17, 2012)

Schmetterling said:


> Has anyone said yet:
> Timothy is in for such a surprise! *snigger*


Uh oh!! Will this make me blush??


----------



## spanglechick (Dec 17, 2012)

i've had tea at the wolsley, twice actually...  which seems a bit of a waste.  then somewhere glam on marble arch, and another place at the other end of park lane.


----------



## neonwilderness (Dec 17, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Btw, thank you all for your very kind words and comments during this series. Remember, whenever you eat lamb make sure......NO WOOL!!! xxx


That's the best way to eat it, or so I've heard 

Do you know if there are any plans for a follow up at some point, or is it just going to be the three episodes?


----------



## susie12 (Dec 18, 2012)

Noma were so taking the piss.  Ants!  Hay!  Lol!


----------



## souljacker (Dec 18, 2012)

I ate at Gordon Ramsays restaurant a while back. Sadly, didn't get to meet the now legendary @timothylock, but did manage to have a good chat with the very rotund doorman. He hasn't been featured much but he's a lovely bloke. I was a bit pissed and I asked him "So, how do you get a gig like this then mate?" which made him laugh. He ended up pretty much telling me his life story.

I thought the place would be right up its arse but it was actually really relaxed and friendly. Fucking pricey though. The cheapest whisky was £20 for a single.


----------



## gabi (Dec 18, 2012)

It was an enjoyable show but what an array of complete and utter cocks. Probably the worst was the lift guy. Sorry, 'Master of the Lift'


----------



## Schmetterling (Dec 18, 2012)

timothylock said:


> Uh oh!! Will this make me blush??


 
A quick search tells me you have not posted on any other threads.  

Don't worry; we are verrrrry, verrry friendly.  *nods head up and down very fast*


----------



## Supine (Dec 18, 2012)

I enjoyed the show. It's nice to know the traditions or Fawlty Towers is alive and well in a world class hotel 

I might need a pay rise before I stay there


----------



## Minnie_the_Minx (Dec 18, 2012)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Did that American bride really say that one of her wonderful new experiences was eating leeks?


 
I giggled at that


----------

