# My DBS has a conviction on it that I never done did



## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

I got a new DBS in the post and it shows a conviction in Milan from 2007 for 'Foreign Leg/Possessing Listed False Instrument W/I.....Forgery and Counterfeiting Act 1981', for which I was apparently imprisoned for eleven months & 10 days and fined €600.
I have no recollection of this. I have never even been to Milan.

I do recall getting a letter in the post from Italy accusing of me of something and it turned out someone had stolen my passport and used it to open loads of accounts to cash fraudulent cheque s. Something like that anyway. 
Why has this never come up before? I've had loads of CRBs before but this is my first DBS.
I hope I can get this sorted easily. I'm not sure what my employers will do as they presumably will be told this. ,


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## cesare (Mar 21, 2014)

Ooer! 

*



			Disputes
		
Click to expand...

*


> Content of a DBS certificate can be challenged or disputed if it contains an error, or inaccurate or irrelevant information. Challenges and disputes should be made immediately by contacting the DBS and should be raised within 3 months of the date of issue on the certificate.
> 
> The applicant, or a person who has a legitimate interest in the accuracy of a certificate such as the countersignatory; employer; or licensing authority may raise the dispute after discussing the reasons for the dispute with the applicant.



https://www.gov.uk/disclosure-and-barring-service-criminal-record-checks-referrals-and-complaints

Sorry if you already know this.


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## DotCommunist (Mar 21, 2014)

they'll never take you alive!


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

cesare said:


> Ooer!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Their phone lines closed at 5, so I'll have to wait until Monday to call them. I'm just worried what work will do about it.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Foreign Leg!


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Maybe I did done did something. I did go on some epic benders in those days.


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## Voley (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Foreign Leg!


If you're going to be convicted of something incorrectly that's not a bad one to have tbf.


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## Mr Smin (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Maybe I did done did something. I did go on some epic benders in those days.


11 months inside is a whole new level of epic bender though.


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## Belushi (Mar 21, 2014)

Ring them first thing Monday and speak to your school about it straight away. The employer isn't sent a copy of the DBS certificate any more so it's up to you to tell them.


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## DotCommunist (Mar 21, 2014)

in ancient polynesian culture the 'painted leg' was a tribal drummer with a heavily tatooed leg, sometimes but not always an intersex, third gender etc person

Have you checked your leg for signs of tatooing? do you find yourself yearning to do a three hour drum solo?


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## equationgirl (Mar 21, 2014)

Do you have documentation relating to the stolen passport? Tell work straight away.


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## Belushi (Mar 21, 2014)

It may be useful if you can show them the previous CRB without your spell in an Italian jail as well.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

equationgirl said:


> Do you have documentation relating to the stolen passport? Tell work straight away.


Nope.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Belushi said:


> It may be useful if you can show them the previous CRB without your spell in an Italian jail as well.


Yeah, they've seen at least two already


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## FridgeMagnet (Mar 21, 2014)

I'd check both your legs tbh. Does one of them have a bit of an accent, likes funny food?


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## equationgirl (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Nope.


Why not?


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## equationgirl (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Yeah, they've seen at least two already


That certainly helps strengthen your case that it's an error. Take them both in on Monday.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

equationgirl said:


> Why not?


I never keep any documentation. 
Cos I am a maverick.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

equationgirl said:


> That certainly helps strengthen your case that it's an error. Take them both in on Monday.


They have copies of them already


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

FridgeMagnet said:


> I'd check both your legs tbh. Does one of them have a bit of an accent, likes funny food?


I've heard of Foreign Accent Syndrome, but this is ridiculous


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## Rebelda (Mar 21, 2014)

What on earth is a listed false instrument? 

Sorry OU, but this is hilarious. I'm sure work will see the ludicrous side


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## Miss-Shelf (Mar 21, 2014)

If I was your boss that would amuse me for ever - imagine all the un-amusing piss taking that's going to come to you all the time now


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## Pickman's model (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I never keep any documentation.
> Cos I am a maverick.


i'm sure you can think of a shorter, more pungent and more accurate word than 'maverick'.


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## Rebelda (Mar 21, 2014)

You need a way to tie the 'foreign leg' story to the 'spanish flamenco dancer stamped on my foot' one.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Rebelda said:


> What on earth is a listed false instrument?
> 
> Sorry OU, but this is hilarious. I'm sure work will see the ludicrous side


I think it's for a false ID


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## Rebelda (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I think it's for a false ID


Boring. Come up with something better for Monday


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Belushi said:


> Ring them first thing Monday and speak to your school about it straight away. The employer isn't sent a copy of the DBS certificate any more so it's up to you to tell them.


What's the point of it if it's up to you to tell them?


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Pickman's model said:


> i'm sure you can think of a shorter, more pungent and more accurate word than 'maverick'.


Mensch


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## xes (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Maybe I did done did something. I did go on some epic benders in those days.


maybe some kind of identity fraud thing, someone claimed to be you? Throwing eggs at the wall here..... (or they just fucked up)


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## trashpony (Mar 21, 2014)

I saw you a fair bit in 2007. You definitely weren't in an Italian prison 

</helpful>


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## xes (Mar 21, 2014)

Pickman's model said:


> i'm sure you can think of a shorter, more pungent and more accurate word than 'maverick'.


My mate calls his Dog "Mav" which is short for Maverick


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## DotCommunist (Mar 21, 2014)

'It wasn't me, it was the one legged man'


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

xes said:


> maybe some kind of identity fraud thing, someone claimed to be you? Throwing eggs at the wall here..... (or they just fucked up)


Yup, it must be to do with this, even though it was 3 years earlier:
http://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/italian-translation-help-needed.12737/


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## Pickman's model (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Mensch


at this point 'idiot' would perhaps be closer to the mark as you do not seem to any longer possess the documentation which would allow you to prove it's not you


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## el-ahrairah (Mar 21, 2014)

you've a very common name.  that might be related.


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## Voley (Mar 21, 2014)

I reckon you did it. You foreign leg listed instrument wrong 'un.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Pickman's model said:


> at this point 'idiot' would perhaps be closer to the mark as you do not seem to any longer possess the documentation which would allow you to prove it's not you


I hope you have a nice weekend, Pickman's.


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## DotCommunist (Mar 21, 2014)

its the curse of putting your left leg in- it becomes forever foriegn. If only the OP had stuck to pushing pineapples and shaking trees


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## Pickman's model (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I hope you have a nice weekend, Pickman's.


how do you expect to prove there's been an error?


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Pickman's model said:


> how do you expect to prove there's been an error?


By getting them to check their records.
I'm sure I can prove i wasn't in Milan. 
I sorted it out with a phone call last time.


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## Pickman's model (Mar 21, 2014)

here's hoping you have a good weekend, orang


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## Belushi (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> What's the point of it if it's up to you to tell them?



Well in my job we expect them to show us the DBS when they receive it, if they refuse then we know there's something not right


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## equationgirl (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I never keep any documentation.
> Cos I am a maverick.


That's not the word I would use. Throw stuff away by all means but you need to keep important documents like that.


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## stuff_it (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Foreign Leg!


*rubs knees*


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## Belushi (Mar 21, 2014)

How many passports have you lost or had stolen over the years anyway? I'm surprised Interpol haven't got a warrant out for your arrest, there are probably crimes being committed in your name across five continents


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## 19sixtysix (Mar 21, 2014)

It is clear to me that your mafia history is unravelling. Expect your european arrest warrent shortly.


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## chilango (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> By getting them to check their records.
> I'm sure I can prove i wasn't in Milan.
> I sorted it out with a phone call last time.



i've had police checks done in Milan if you need any advice on that.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

equationgirl said:


> That's not the word I would use. Throw stuff away by all means but you need to keep important documents like that.


I know. I'm just not very good at keeping stuff
 I shove it in a carrier bag, get sick of lugging it about and then chuck it out. I hate clutter/stuff


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## Orang Utan (Mar 21, 2014)

Belushi said:


> How many passports have you lost or had stolen over the years anyway? I'm surprised Interpol haven't got a warrant out for your arrest, there are probably crimes being committed in your name across five continents


Only 1! I misplaced another one but got it back


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## DotCommunist (Mar 21, 2014)

I did find it interesting to learn that the tribal cultures of old would use long, loud and intense drum sessions to abstract the human brain. Almost to remove it from conscious thought but into older pre-cognitive models of thinking. To be as we say today, lost in the beat. And it wasn't just vine of the gods ayuhusca trips either, people could be trapped in the drums and have real feelings of the divine. How far have we come from those times yet still people feel the bass and trip out to it, sometimes aided by good old E but sometimes sober as a judge. Strange fields.

I realise this has nothing to do with your foreign leg orang so excuse me brainfarting.


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## Hocus Eye. (Mar 21, 2014)

DotCommunist said:


> I did find it interesting to learn that the tribal cultures of old would use long, loud and intense drum sessions to abstract the human brain. Almost to remove it from conscious thought but into older pre-cognitive models of thinking. To be as we say today, lost in the beat. And it wasn't just vine of the gods ayuhusca trips either, people could be trapped in the drums and have real feelings of the divine. How far have we come from those times yet still people feel the bass and trip out to it, sometimes aided by good old E but sometimes sober as a judge. Strange fields.
> 
> I realise this has nothing to do with your foreign leg orang so excuse me brainfarting.



Nurse, the screens quick!


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## chilango (Mar 21, 2014)

DotCommunist said:


> I did find it interesting to learn that the tribal cultures of old would use long, loud and intense drum sessions to abstract the human brain. Almost to remove it from conscious thought but into older pre-cognitive models of thinking. To be as we say today, lost in the beat. And it wasn't just vine of the gods ayuhusca trips either, people could be trapped in the drums and have real feelings of the divine. How far have we come from those times yet still people feel the bass and trip out to it, sometimes aided by good old E but sometimes sober as a judge. Strange fields.
> 
> I realise this has nothing to do with your foreign leg orang so excuse me brainfarting.


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## wayward bob (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Foreign Leg!



i read it as possession of a counterfeit false leg from ww1


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## killer b (Mar 21, 2014)

xes said:


> My mate calls his Dog "Mav" which is short for Maverick


that's what he tells you. actually it's mavis.


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## Pickman's model (Mar 21, 2014)

Belushi said:


> How many passports have you lost or had stolen over the years anyway? I'm surprised Interpol haven't got a warrant out for your arrest, there are probably crimes being committed in your name across five continents


to be fair, most of them are war crimes


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## Puddy_Tat (Mar 21, 2014)

I encountered one similar thing when I used to do police record checks for taxi drivers - turned out that Mr X had acquired a conviction, because Mr Y had given Mr X's name and details when he got caught.

This got sorted out by Mr X having to visit the old billodrome and giving fingerprints, which did not match those on his record (I have no idea what if anything then happened to Mr Y)

Obviously in this case, both people lived in the Uk so it was easier to sort out.

I think you're going to have to talk to your employers about this and explain the circumstances.  May be worth ringing DBS first.

(It may be better to say that the letter about this situation got destroyed in a domestic calamity / stolen with some other papers, rather than that you binned it) and see what they say.

It's just possible that they might suspend you from work, although I'd have thought that it's anything that's (allegedly) kiddy related that they are more likely to panic about.

hope you get it sorted.

if you disappear off here, we'll assume you've been extradited to italy...


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## Onket (Mar 21, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I got a new DBS in the post and it shows a conviction in Milan from 2007 for 'Foreign Leg/Possessing Listed False Instrument W/I.....Forgery and Counterfeiting Act 1981', for which I was apparently imprisoned for eleven months & 10 days and fined €600.
> I have no recollection of this. I have never even been to Milan.
> 
> I do recall getting a letter in the post from Italy accusing of me of something and it turned out someone had stolen my passport and used it to open loads of accounts to cash fraudulent cheque s. Something like that anyway.
> ...


What-a mistake-a to make-a.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 22, 2014)

Puddy_Tat said:


> I encountered one similar thing when I used to do police record checks for taxi drivers - turned out that Mr X had acquired a conviction, because Mr Y had given Mr X's name and details when he got caught.
> 
> This got sorted out by Mr X having to visit the old billodrome and giving fingerprints, which did not match those on his record (I have no idea what if anything then happened to Mr Y)
> 
> ...


The ideal situation, of course, is to get suspended from work on full pay and it takes months to sort out. <crosses fingers>


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## kittyP (Mar 22, 2014)

Is "foreign leg", "foreign legion"? 

This is bloody hilarious, sorry OU


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## Orang Utan (Mar 22, 2014)

I think it's funny too, though I can see it might be rather vexing to sort out.


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## Pickman's model (Mar 22, 2014)

kittyP said:


> Is "foreign leg", "foreign legion"?
> 
> This is bloody hilarious, sorry OU


at least he'll be able to find an employer if he's sacked.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

Spoke to the DBS this morning and they may be able to sort it out by 'unmatching' me, but it probably won't work and they'll have to get the Italian authorities involved, which means it'll take months to sort out. Apparently the Italians ain't too hot on paperwork.


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## 5t3IIa (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Spoke to the DBS this morning and they may be able to sort it out by 'unmatching' me, but it probably won't work and they'll have to get the Italian authorities involved, which means it'll take months to sort out. Apparently the Italians ain't too hot on paperwork.


Have you spoken to work about it?


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

5t3IIa said:


> Have you spoken to work about it?


Yes. First thing. I'm not barred from working with kids, so I think they are happy for me to continue working.


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## The Octagon (Mar 24, 2014)

Could up the cred with the kids.

"I heard Mr Utan done time in an italian nick, must be mafia or sumfing"


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

They just told me they may need to do a risk assessment on me! Eh?


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## Onket (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> They just told me they may need to do a risk assessment on me! Eh?


Surprised they didn't do that on sight, tbh. 

Seriously though, maybe get some advice from your union? I can't see any need for the employer to carry out a risk assesment at this stage.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

Onket said:


> Surprised they didn't do that on sight, tbh.
> 
> Seriously though, maybe get some advice from your union? I can't see any need for the employer to carry out a risk assesment at this stage.


I don't even know what it would entail!


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## Onket (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I don't even know what it would entail!


Your union can help with that.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

Onket said:


> Your union can help with that.


I have informed them, thanks. Their website says I should inform them of this sort of thing in any case


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## sim667 (Mar 24, 2014)

Ive never been given an oppurtunity to see my CRB checks, so I don't even know if there's errors on there....

Is it possible to check your own crb's?


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## Pickman's model (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Spoke to the DBS this morning and they may be able to sort it out by 'unmatching' me, but it probably won't work and they'll have to get the Italian authorities involved, which means it'll take months to sort out. Apparently the Italians ain't too hot on paperwork.


good luck with it. but then you've shown you're not too hot on paperwork yourself - it would have expedited matters if you'd kept the necessary documents.


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## Thora (Mar 24, 2014)

sim667 said:


> Ive never been given an oppurtunity to see my CRB checks, so I don't even know if there's errors on there....
> 
> Is it possible to check your own crb's?


You should get a copy sent to you every time


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

You get sent them in the post! I may be rubbish at keeping correspondence, but even I keep hold of my CRBs.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

Pickman's model said:


> good luck with it. but then you've shown you're not too hot on paperwork yourself - it would have expedited matters if you'd kept the necessary documents.


It hardly needs to be pointed out


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## Pickman's model (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> It hardly needs to be pointed out


i hope this won't recur in future


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

Pickman's model said:


> i hope this won't recur in future


Nah,you'd love it!


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## Pickman's model (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Nah,you'd love it!


while it's initially amusing, it does get dull quite quickly


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## sim667 (Mar 24, 2014)

Thora said:


> You should get a copy sent to you every time


 
Ive never been sent one


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## Pickman's model (Mar 24, 2014)

sim667 said:


> Ive never been sent one


have they got your right address?


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

sim667 said:


> Ive never been sent one


You must have done!
Purple ink?


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## Thora (Mar 24, 2014)

sim667 said:


> Ive never been sent one


Very strange - two copies were sent of CRBs, one to the applicant and one to the employer.


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## sim667 (Mar 24, 2014)

Hmmmm.....

maybe my employers have never bothered (I wouildnt put it past my current job, especially if they have to pay for it), but im meant to have extended crb's


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## Thora (Mar 24, 2014)

sim667 said:


> Hmmmm.....
> 
> maybe my employers have never bothered (I wouildnt put it past my current job, especially if they have to pay for it), but im meant to have extended crb's


You will have had to fill in and sign the form to get a CRB.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

The Octagon said:


> Could up the cred with the kids.
> 
> "I heard Mr Utan done time in an italian nick, must be mafia or sumfing"


If I'm ever found hanging from Blackfriars bridge, the Pope did it alright?


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## sim667 (Mar 24, 2014)

Thora said:


> You will have had to fill in and sign the form to get a CRB.


 
Hmmmm....... I dont recall doing that.

tbh if my employer hasn't done it its their problem not mine, ive never been done.


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## chilango (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Spoke to the DBS this morning and they may be able to sort it out by 'unmatching' me, but it probably won't work and they'll have to get the Italian authorities involved, which means it'll take months to sort out. Apparently the Italians ain't too hot on paperwork.



The Ministry of Justice in Milan are very efficient. More so than their English counterparts.

Their service was fast, friendly and straight forward when I got my checks done there. Very civilised and hassle free.

Any fault for delay won't lie there.

No matter what xenophobic stereotypes might suggest.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

Cheers, I wasn't intending to perpetuate a stereotype, but that's what the chap on the phone said. And my mum. She was a teacher in Turin well over 40 years ago, so the system just might have improved by now


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## chilango (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Cheers, I wasn't intending to perpetuate a stereotype, but that's what the chap on the phone said. And my mum. She was a teacher in Turin well over 40 years ago, so the system just might have improved by now



Yeah.

I found all paperwork in Milan pretty efficient tbh. But, you do have to follow the correct process. I was particularly impressed with their CRB equivalent though. I needed two. One to say I had no convictions and one to say there were no cases pending. Applied online, took the reference number I was sent into the Ministry, paid the fees, had a coffee or two and picked up my certificates a couple of hours later.


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## tombowler (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> They just told me they may need to do a risk assessment on me! Eh?


they should have done that before you started working with kids. Good luck getting it cleared up.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 24, 2014)

tombowler said:


> they should have done that before you started working with kids. Good luck getting it cleared up.


I thought risk assessments were for situations, not people. Like school trips


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## chilango (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I thought risk assessments were for situations, not people. Like school trips


I think you've just become a situation !


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## Belushi (Mar 24, 2014)

Mild mannered librarian or Italian jailbird..


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## tombowler (Mar 24, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I thought risk assessments were for situations, not people. Like school trips


It was meant as a joke,
on a serious side, i think we had to risk assess situations and people, ie pregnant worker, risk assessment needed to so we were protecting her and her unborn child.


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## 8115 (Mar 24, 2014)

No, they now know that you could be a possible top criminal. 

They've decided to let you keep working.   But they might need to risk assess you, so for instance, they might lock the coffee fund away for the present time.  Don't worry about it.

eta that's a joke by the way.  I can't imagine anything will come of the risk assessment.


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## Onket (Mar 24, 2014)

I think it's teabags that go missing in Orang Utan's workplace, if memory serves.


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## friedaweed (Mar 24, 2014)

I would deffo hire someone with this on their DBS


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## Orang Utan (Jul 12, 2014)

I finally got a letter off them. I'm in the clear!


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## DotCommunist (Jul 12, 2014)

got away with it this time eh


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## Puddy_Tat (Jul 12, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I finally got a letter off them. I'm in the clear!



without wishing to start a bunfight, can i respectfully suggest that you DON'T THROW THIS SODDING LETTER AWAY!


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## equationgirl (Jul 12, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I finally got a letter off them. I'm in the clear!


Keep this letter somewhere safe. Do not throw it away - EVER!!!

I would seriously consider getting a safety deposit box just for this letter.


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## Pickman's model (Jul 12, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I finally got a letter off them. I'm in the clear!


foiled again 

until the next time, orang utan...


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## Puddy_Tat (Jul 12, 2014)

equationgirl said:


> I would seriously consider getting a safety deposit box just for this letter.



and for his biscuits...


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## Orang Utan (Jul 12, 2014)

equationgirl said:


> Keep this letter somewhere safe. Do not throw it away - EVER!!!
> 
> I would seriously consider getting a safety deposit box just for this letter.


Nah. It's the DBS that's coming that I really need to treasure


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## Belushi (Jul 12, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> Nah. It's the DBS that's coming that I really need to treasure



And this bloody letter, you want as much evidence as possible for when they fuck it up the next time!


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## Belushi (Jul 12, 2014)

In fact give me the letter and the DBS certificate so in three years time you know where it is


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## Orang Utan (Jul 13, 2014)

I don't know where the letter is now


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## Belushi (Jul 13, 2014)




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## Sapphireblue (Jul 14, 2014)

scan it in, email it to yourself, make copies etc.


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## Quartz (Jul 14, 2014)

Sapphireblue said:


> scan it in, email it to yourself, make copies etc.



OU should go to a solicitor and make a certified copy. Others could be dismissed as fakes.


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## Sapphireblue (Jul 14, 2014)

true. or the post office will do certified copies as well.


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## stuff_it (Jul 14, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I finally got a letter off them. I'm in the clear!





Orang Utan said:


> I don't know where the letter is now





Sapphireblue said:


> scan it in, email it to yourself, make copies etc.


^^^This times 1000


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## Orang Utan (Jul 14, 2014)

My work has a copy


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## Orang Utan (Jul 14, 2014)

Quartz said:


> OU should go to a solicitor and make a certified copy. Others could be dismissed as fakes.


I can't tell if you're joking or not


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## Pickman's model (Jul 14, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I can't tell if you're joking or not


Quartz is not joking


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## StoneRoad (Jul 14, 2014)

Certified copies and original held in safe place (safety deposit box or similar) also emailed scans to self and a friend or two. You had better not rely on *work* keeping their copy safe, either !! (experience talking there for me, although it wasn't a CRB type document in my case)


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## Orang Utan (Jul 14, 2014)

I'm not paying a solicitor for anything!


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## Combustible (Jul 14, 2014)

If it's from Disclosure Scotland then you can send it back to them and they will certify it for free.


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## TheHoodedClaw (Jul 14, 2014)

Orang Utan said:


> I'm not paying a solicitor for anything!



If you have the original, the Post Office will certify a copy much cheaper than a solicitor will. Mind you, having read the thread, I'm not entirely sure what documents you may or may not still possess.


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## equationgirl (Jul 18, 2014)

oh ffs Orang Utan - do you really want to go through 3 months of hassle with the Italian authorities every time you have to get a DBS done? Sort yourself out!


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## Orang Utan (Jul 18, 2014)

It's sorted!


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## FridgeMagnet (Jul 18, 2014)

Did you work out which leg it was in the end?


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## equationgirl (Jul 18, 2014)

So 


Orang Utan said:


> It's sorted!


you've found the letter, put it in a safe place and made certified copies of it?


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## Orang Utan (Jul 19, 2014)

Have I fuck.


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## Orang Utan (Jul 19, 2014)

FridgeMagnet said:


> Did you work out which leg it was in the end?


The foreign one


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

This has come up again and it’s still on my record, with another conviction for drug importing! What a nightmare to sort out


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## Steel Icarus (Jan 29, 2021)

At least you know you got it sorted before.


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## Pickman's model (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> This has come up again and it’s still on my record, with another conviction for drug importing! What a nightmare to sort out


Dig out the letter from last time


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## killer b (Jan 29, 2021)

the later posts in this thread are like a warning from the past.


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## Pickman's model (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> This has come up again and it’s still on my record, with another conviction for drug importing! What a nightmare to sort out


If you can't find the letter can you find emails from before showing you sorting this out? Because if you can (and even if you can't actually) you should go to a solicitor (first appt often free) and see how they suggest you remedy this. But one thing that comes to mind is you could be able to sue over continuing presence of something you were told was removed - potentially for libel. You might make a subject access request to the police for the information they have about you. You should also see if from work emails you can prove where you were at the time of the second if not first alleged offence.


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## Pickman's model (Jan 29, 2021)

And if/when you talk to a solicitor ask about your options under data protection legislation as from what you say the first conviction should have been removed and if it wasn't you ought to go before a court as without a court order how can you have confidence it's gone?


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

I might have to go into a police station to submit fingerprints!


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

Pickman's model said:


> Dig out the letter from last time


LOL


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## StoneRoad (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan 

Really, this is the sort of thing for which you MUST keep records / documents.

OH, who was a teacher for many years and still has CRS/enhanched DBS [subscription for the renewal scheme] told me about something similar.
Fortunately, the other teacher had kept records which proved DBS had made mistakes and it was a case of mistaken identity.
But it still took much time to resolve, which would have been even longer without the proper records.


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## Pickman's model (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> I might have to go into a police station to submit fingerprints!


which you wouldn't if you'd kept the letter as equationgirl suggested. have you a passport? 

talk to a solicitor. there may well be better ways of dealing with this than you're aware of.


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## Pickman's model (Jan 29, 2021)

Athos might have something useful to say


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

Can’t afford a solicitor - will just have to keep doing this every time


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## editor (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> This has come up again and it’s still on my record, with another conviction for drug importing! What a nightmare to sort out


You sound like a useful guy to know.


(but I am sorry - this must be a right ballache to sort out)


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## Pickman's model (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Can’t afford a solicitor - will just have to keep doing this every time


as i have said you will almost certainly be able to have a free consultation with a solicitor. look at your local paper and call one or two and ask. the worst they can say is no. see if there's a local law centre, and if there is the contact them. 

and have a fucking good look for that letter because it will make the entire thing so much easier if you can find it.


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## danny la rouge (Jan 29, 2021)

This, incidentally, is a major reason why I oppose state ID and database schemes.  

Every central data repository creates a single point of failure for accuracy. If one institution gets the facts wrong about you then _everyone_ with access gets it wrong about you, rather than just one institution. That makes it much harder to correct.

I hope you sort it out soon.


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## nogojones (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> This has come up again and it’s still on my record, with another conviction for drug importing! What a nightmare to sort out


Gutted you got caught


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

nogojones said:


> Gutted you got caught


Must have been an epic bender - tequila or Jaeger black out probs!


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## nogojones (Jan 29, 2021)

Someone I know took this approach to getting stuff through customs - Just get wankered on the plane. It worked for them, but I wouldn't recommend. I think it was luck rather than judgement.


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## clicker (Jan 29, 2021)

Your union might give free solicitor advice?


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## danny la rouge (Jan 29, 2021)

clicker said:


> Your union might give free solicitor advice?


Worth checking.


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## Athos (Jan 29, 2021)

You need to go through this process:









						Report a problem about a criminal record check or barring decision
					

Appeal a mistake on a criminal record check certificate or appeal a decision on DBS's list of people who are barred from certain roles




					www.gov.uk
				




Given this has happened before, you could also report it to the ICO, as you have a right that personal information is accurate.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

Athos said:


> You need to go through this process:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Ta, have already done that


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## FridgeMagnet (Jan 29, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> This, incidentally, is a major reason why I oppose state ID and database schemes.
> 
> Every central data repository creates a single point of failure for accuracy. If one institution gets the facts wrong about you then _everyone_ with access gets it wrong about you, rather than just one institution. That makes it much harder to correct.
> 
> I hope you sort it out soon.


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## danny la rouge (Jan 29, 2021)

FridgeMagnet said:


> View attachment 251911


Exactly.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

FridgeMagnet said:


> View attachment 251911


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## danny la rouge (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


>


Tuttle/Buttle.  The central theme of the film, Brazil.


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## FridgeMagnet (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


>


From _Brazil_.


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## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 29, 2021)

One of my friend (stupidly) let one his mate get a passport in his name back in the 80s
he is now barred from Gibraltar for life.


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## Puddy_Tat (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> I might have to go into a police station to submit fingerprints!



that may be one way of trying to sort it out

i used to handle (then equivalent of) DBS checks for taxi drivers.

one came back with a record and we said we wanted to have a little chat.  he was somewhat surprised by this.

turned out that someone (not sure whether it was an acquaintance / ex friend / complete identity theft) had given taxi driver's name and date of birth etc when he got done for something.  

in the end, taxi driver had to give fingerprints which showed he was not the same person who had been done.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

I didn’t choose the thug life, the thug life chose me


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## StoneRoad (Jan 29, 2021)

And Orang Utan 
when you get the letter confirming this new chaos is sorted out

KEEP THE LETTER IN A SAFE PLACE


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## Orang Utan (Jan 29, 2021)

StoneRoad said:


> And Orang Utan
> when you get the letter confirming this new chaos is sorted out
> 
> KEEP THE LETTER IN A SAFE PLACE


I won’t


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## planetgeli (Jan 29, 2021)

This is fairly outrageous isn't it Orang Utan? 

Really disappointed in your innocence.


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## wtfftw (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> I won’t


I'll do it for you. Send it on to me.


Belushi offered before so.


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## 19sixtysix (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> I won’t



Just scan it in and leave it on this thread for the next time.


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## danski (Jan 29, 2021)

19sixtysix said:


> Just scan it in and leave it on this thread for the next time.


So we can all nick his identity?!!


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## hash tag (Jan 29, 2021)

I have had an enhanced DBS or equivalent for many years now. Today I was told I needed an NPPV1?
They went on to say its a simple name, address and job check; if so, why do I need it in addition to my DBS?


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## alsoknownas (Jan 29, 2021)

wtfftw said:


> I'll do it for you. Send it on to me.
> 
> 
> Belushi offered before so.


I wouldn't trust that Orang Utan .  This is how they get you


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## Guineveretoo (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Can’t afford a solicitor - will just have to keep doing this every time


Assuming you’re a union member (?), contact their legal department. You should be able to get free legal advice to get this sorted once and for all.


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## a_chap (Jan 29, 2021)

This has been a thoroughly entertaining thread to read from the beginning 

Made me wonder how many other international master criminals are lurking on U75 apart from OU.


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## mojo pixy (Jan 29, 2021)

Orang Utan When you've got it straightened out, and especially if you're inclined to lose paperwork, subscribe to the DBS Update Service. £13 a year and probably nothing to worry about ever again. I mean, future crime sprees notwithstanding...


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## Mation (Jan 29, 2021)

StoneRoad said:


> Orang Utan
> 
> Really, this is the sort of thing for which you MUST keep records / documents.





StoneRoad said:


> And Orang Utan
> when you get the letter confirming this new chaos is sorted out
> 
> KEEP THE LETTER IN A SAFE PLACE


This is all very useful advice for people who are able to do that kind of thing. I imagine.


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## bellaozzydog (Jan 29, 2021)

This shit is going to end in a dark hours rendition flight for sure

I doubt inmate solidarity letters to Prity Patel are gonna cut much ice


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## Epona (Jan 29, 2021)

Mation said:


> This is all very useful advice for people who are able to do that kind of thing. I imagine.



Seriously if I am told I have to find a letter about something that was sent to me a few years ago I'd probably just break down, looking at the devastation that is my home and my life.  I always mean well but the word "chaotic" only just skims the surface.  Other people seem to find this sort of shit easy and I am not sure how that works.

Orang Utan - I hope you manage to get it sorted out OK.


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## muscovyduck (Jan 29, 2021)

The ICO are really good if you email them with specific enquiries and everyone's shit scared of them because they're one of the few people who can give out fines


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## editor (Jan 29, 2021)

Every time I glimpse the title I imagine it says: 

_My DBS has a conviction on it wot I never done_

Good luck sorting it out OU!


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## StoneRoad (Jan 29, 2021)

Mation said:


> This is all very useful advice for people who are able to do that kind of thing. I imagine.


Buy a decent sized cash box, fold the letter up and put it in there, put the box in with your clothes, keep the key on the fob/ring with your front door key.

[I have a deed box for a few specific things like degree & charter certificates ... and the best pics I have of my late parents]


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## Sasaferrato (Jan 29, 2021)

bellaozzydog said:


> This shit is going to end in a dark hours rendition flight for sure
> 
> I doubt inmate solidarity letters to Prity Patel are gonna cut much ice


Cuba is nice this time of year.


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## Mation (Jan 29, 2021)

StoneRoad said:


> Buy a decent sized cash box, fold the letter up and put it in there, put the box in with your clothes, keep the key on the fob/ring with your front door key.
> 
> [I have a deed box for a few specific things like degree & charter certificates ... and the best pics I have of my late parents]


That's a good, thoughtful suggestion, in that it includes placing an important thing somewhere you will have to look regularly, with a method of access that you always have to have on you. Genuinely. 

As a system, for me, it might even last 3-6 months.


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## mauvais (Jan 29, 2021)

danski said:


> So we can all nick his identity?!!


Surely we'd want one _without_ a criminal record?


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## Epona (Jan 30, 2021)

Mation said:


> That's a good, thoughtful suggestion, in that it includes placing an important thing somewhere you will have to look regularly, with a method of access that you always have to have on you. Genuinely.
> 
> As a system, for me, it might even last 3-6 months.



My main storage issue is that my OH hoards clothes.  Putting something "in with your clothes" is not going to help in locating it when the majority of the hoarded crap in your home is boxes and boxes and boxes (rooms full basically) of clothes.


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## StoneRoad (Jan 30, 2021)

Epona said:


> My main storage issue is that my OH hoards clothes.  Putting something "in with your clothes" is not going to help in locating it when the majority of the hoarded crap in your home is boxes and boxes and boxes (rooms full basically) of clothes.


An elderly maiden aunt of mine used to keep her tin for such things as "*rent money" either on the mantlepiece - some letters were kept behind the clock or in the kitchen cupboard with her supply of tea, sugar and biscuits [*except she owned the house !]


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## Clair De Lune (Jan 31, 2021)

This is a stark warning to us ADHDers to find a way to keep documents safe eh. Fuck.


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## DaveCinzano (Jan 31, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> i used to handle (then equivalent of) DBS checks for *taxi drivers*.


I really must get my eyes tested, could've sworn it said 'Nazi war criminals', which certainly piqued my interest.


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## Puddy_Tat (Jan 31, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> I really must get my eyes tested, could've sworn it said 'Nazi war criminals', which certainly piqued my interest.


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## Chilli.s (Jan 31, 2021)

editor said:


> Every time I glimpse the title I imagine it says:
> 
> _My DBS has a conviction on it wot I never done_
> 
> Good luck sorting it out OU!


That's the email to the ICO written already, hit send, job done.


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## Mation (Jan 31, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> This is a stark warning to us ADHDers to find a way to keep documents safe eh. Fuck.


As soon as I have cleared enough space  I'm going to get a filing cabinet to put by my desk. It's currently working well for me at work, for archiving. Suspension/hanging folders, and then open-ended card folders that sit in the hanging folders. Don't know the name for them, but a search turns up this (which still doesn't seem to give them a proper name):







The hanging folders mean they stay in place, and the unnamed open-ended folders with one side higher than the other mean that I can write on the higher bit to say what's in it, and can see everything at-a-glance as soon as I open the drawer. I can just drop in any document I need to add without having to take anything out of the cabinet.

I've been able to maintain it for about a year, thus far


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## Pickman's model (Jan 31, 2021)

Chilli.s said:


> That's the email to the ICO written already, hit send, job done.


Not to mention the ico reply


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## two sheds (Jan 31, 2021)

It does also read like there should be more convictions on it wot OU did done


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## Clair De Lune (Jan 31, 2021)

Mation said:


> As soon as I have cleared enough space  I'm going to get a filing cabinet to put by my desk. It's currently working well for me at work, for archiving. Suspension/hanging folders, and then open-ended card folders that sit in the hanging folders. Don't know the name for them, but a search turns up this (which still doesn't seem to give them a proper name):
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Thats a good idea. I've started many 'safe places' over the years but I need something I can't lose when moving house


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## Puddy_Tat (Jan 31, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> Thats a good idea. I've started many 'safe places' over the years but I need something I can't lose when moving house



it's amazing how much bumf life generates, especially when everything's supposed to be online and paperless now.

i have progressed from a briefcase to a filing box to a 2 drawer filing cabinet with a small drawer at the top that is the 'stuff to be filed' drawer.  Every 6 months or so that gets full, so I have a filing exercise and usually manage to throw a bit of old stuff out.


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## Mation (Jan 31, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> Thats a good idea. I've started many 'safe places' over the years but I need something I can't lose when moving house


Innit. Box files, concertina-type things; they all work for a bit. But I can pick them up and put them down somewhere else that's later unfathomable and impossible to find. Or I can struggle with opening or finding the right bit, and so dump whatever wherever. And then not be able to find what I'm looking for on multiple fronts.

Those plastic clippy things that go on hanging folders are hard for me to get on and off, and to get the titchy tiny bit of carboard label out and in again. The open-sided folders at least mean I have the full width (length) of A4 to write some identifying thing/s that I can see straight away. I use the clippy labels solely to write a letter of the alphabet.


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## Clair De Lune (Jan 31, 2021)

I actually really like filing cabinets and have always wanted one. The shabbier the better


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## Mation (Jan 31, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> I actually really like filing cabinets and have always wanted one. The shabbier the better


I want a pretty one. So I can spend many hours in which I should be actually getting on with stuff, instead staring at my perfect filing system


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## blairsh (Jan 31, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> I actually really like filing cabinets and have always wanted one. The shabbier the better


The drawers make a great sound. Have one at work for hard copies  of drawings, going back as longs as i've been there (16years)


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## DaveCinzano (Jan 31, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> I actually really like filing cabinets and have always wanted one. The shabbier the better


I had a very shabby 4 drawer metal one. Once I moved it barefoot, which turns out to be a mistake, judging by the big, bloody hole it dug out of my big toe through the centre of the nail when I dropped it corner first onto my foot


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## StoneRoad (Jan 31, 2021)

I've got 2 off metal & I off plastic x 4 drawer plus a 2 metal drawer one. Also a 3 drawer pedestal one that sort of goes with the L shaped desk I have (mine own, at work) I've also got 5 sets actually attached to the various desks in the office at the workshop and here at home.

Plenty of drawers !
and plenty of bookcases / shelving ...


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## A380 (Jan 31, 2021)

I like the approach Sherlock Holmes took to filing, know the age of documents laying around the house by the thickness of the dust on them...


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## WouldBe (Jan 31, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> This is a stark warning to us ADHDers to find a way to keep documents safe eh. Fuck.


I put important things away somewhere safe then forget where the safe place is.


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## belboid (Jan 31, 2021)

hash tag said:


> I have had an enhanced DBS or equivalent for many years now. Today I was told I needed an NPPV1?
> They went on to say its a simple name, address and job check; if so, why do I need it in addition to my DBS?


hmm, it isn't generally that light - it should be more detailed than a DBS, but maybe if your role only has very tangential relation to police work it'll be quite light.








						How NPPV Vetting Differs from DBS
					

If you’ve been looking at making a move into working with the Police, you’ve probably seen the term NPPV. NPPV stands for Non-Police Personnel Vetting and applies to people who are working with the Police but who aren’t police officers.




					clearcheck.co.uk


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## DaveCinzano (Jan 31, 2021)

It is possible to fail vetting even if you are yourself clean. Some of the questions are incredibly vague and wide-reaching. BE CAREFUL!


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## Orang Utan (Feb 4, 2021)

This has been sorted out surprisingly but pleasingly swiftly


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## danny la rouge (Feb 4, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> This has been sorted out surprisingly but pleasingly swiftly


And where are you storing the letter?


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## Orang Utan (Feb 4, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> And where are you storing the letter?


it's already stored electronically but the paper copy will be stored somewhere in/on/under/behind a table/bed/drawer/cupboard/bookcase or somewhere else maybe who knows


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## sim667 (Feb 4, 2021)

Do motoring convictions get recorded on DBS? (I'm about to get 3 points for being an idiot I think).


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## DaveCinzano (Feb 4, 2021)

sim667 said:


> Do motoring convictions get recorded on DBS? (I'm about to get 3 points for being an idiot I think).


I'm pretty sure it was Orang Utan driving


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## Idris2002 (Feb 8, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> It is possible to fail vetting even if you are yourself clean. Some of the questions are incredibly vague and wide-reaching. BE CAREFUL!
> 
> View attachment 252217


I once had to give DNA evidence in a murder case. Would that make me a witness according to that third question, or a suspect?


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Feb 8, 2021)

sim667 said:


> Do motoring convictions get recorded on DBS? (I'm about to get 3 points for being an idiot I think).



my understanding is not if it's something that's a fairly routine endorsement (e.g. speeding, not complying with a road sign or something like that) - i'm not sure about the more serious ones.

there is a way employers can do checks on driving licence status (not uncommon with driving jobs)

most application forms when they ask about convictions say they don't mean minor motoring offences (again, this would be different if it is a driving job)


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## DaveCinzano (Feb 8, 2021)

Idris2002 said:


> I once had to give DNA evidence in a murder case. Would that make me a witness according to that third question, or a suspect?


I think you would have to tick 'yes' and then it would be a point of discussion at any follow up. If you were to tick 'no' you risk being considered as having provided an untruthful answer, and being failed.


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## Pickman's model (Feb 8, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> And where are you storing the letter?


----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 8, 2021)

Idris2002 said:


> I once had to give DNA evidence in a murder case. Would that make me a witness according to that third question, or a suspect?


Assuming you weren’t charged, a witness, I’d assume.  Although I don’t actually know.


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## wemakeyousoundb (Feb 8, 2021)

sim667 said:


> Do motoring convictions get recorded on DBS? (I'm about to get 3 points for being an idiot I think).


Not unless you went to court to get your 3 points I think.


----------

