# Annoying Adverts 2017



## twentythreedom (Jan 7, 2017)

There's fucking loads already this year


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## twentythreedom (Jan 7, 2017)

British Seniors - The lifetime payback guarantee 



IF I SEE YOU CUNTS ON ROAD I'M GONNA FUCKING STAB YOU


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## DaveCinzano (Jan 7, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> British Seniors - The lifetime payback guarantee
> 
> 
> 
> IF I SEE YOU CUNTS ON ROAD I'M GONNA FUCKING STAB YOU


Have you been on the tiles with Spymaster tonight?


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## twentythreedom (Jan 7, 2017)

DaveCinzano said:


> Have you been on the tiles with Spymaster tonight?


 No but I'm with him in spirit 

That advert is infuriating though


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## twentythreedom (Feb 1, 2017)

That Sainsbury's kitchen dancing one. 

Appalling. Hideous. Cringeworthy shit  

Really fucking bad, that one


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## May Kasahara (Feb 3, 2017)

The Fosters idents either side of 8 Out of 10 Cats does Countdown


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## twentythreedom (Feb 3, 2017)

Yes, that too is annoying


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## mx wcfc (Feb 3, 2017)

A mate in the pub tonight was describing how he made a crispy bacon sandwich with mayonnaise in a hot cross bun.  I will hate myself forever for saying "it's a stretch, but I respect you for it".


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## NoXion (Feb 3, 2017)

mx wcfc said:


> A mate in the pub tonight was describing how he made a crispy bacon sandwich with mayonnaise in a hot cross bun.  I will hate myself forever for saying "it's a stretch, but I respect you for it".



Annoying advert?


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## mx wcfc (Feb 3, 2017)

It's a line in an advert for Just Eat or a similar skimming capitalist bastard "ap" .  Regularly on between episodes of Big Bang Theory.  I thought everyone watched Big Bang Theory.	Just me then.


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## twentythreedom (Feb 20, 2017)

Chicago Town. The ultimate pizza hit. 



Just awful. Horrific. People get paid actual money for doing that


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## twentythreedom (Feb 20, 2017)

mx wcfc said:


> A mate in the pub tonight was describing how he made a crispy bacon sandwich with mayonnaise in a hot cross bun.  I will hate myself forever for saying "it's a stretch, but I respect you for it".


A hot cross bun? I feel your pain but it's not quite within the remit of the thread tbf


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## DotCommunist (Feb 20, 2017)

theres one begging you to become a teacher and how they might even lend you the p's to do your cert. All sweetness and light about changing the world and making a difference etc. Proper funhouse mirror bullshit if you've ever spoken to a working state school teacher- shit even FE lecturer- they want out. And we know why.


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## trabuquera (Feb 20, 2017)

This one:


Annoying because:
- it's a transparent attempt to persuade you their phones ARE NOT GOING TO EXPLODE ANY MORE, okay?

- Every single second of the O'Jays' 1975 hit "Got To Give The People What They Want" is sacred and should probably not be used for commerce

- worst of all they only use the first minute, dropping the most relevant bits of the lyrics (  "Well, it's about time for things to get better/ We want the truth, the truth and no more lies /
We want freedom, justice and equality/ ....  People want better education now, now / People want better food to eat / People want, hey, better housing / People need money, money") and the proper breakdown...

 for me, every time, but always happy if it is making surviving O'Jays any richer.


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## twentythreedom (May 9, 2017)

Fucking sick of that 'Shpock' ad


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## twentythreedom (May 20, 2017)

The Nationwide ads with the shit poetry are getting pretty fucking irritating now, didn't mind them at first but bored of them now


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## Sirena (May 20, 2017)

It doesn't annoy me so much as puzzle me



Why is it set in the Middle Ages?
Why is he pretending to be a Geordie?
What is this other thing that achieves the card within sixty seconds?
Were seconds really a concept in the Middle Ages?


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## twentythreedom (Jun 2, 2017)

The new AA advert with the little girl in the car seat singing Proud Mary. Fucking hell, that is one appallingly shit ad


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## gosub (Jul 1, 2017)

This years Wimbleon one: I'm crap at tennis but even I would clearly have left that ball for out, but not Andy Murray


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## smmudge (Jul 9, 2017)

Some dyson advert

"Dirt and dust doesn't wait for the weekly big clean"

Don't fucking tell me how often to clean my house


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## Espresso (Jul 9, 2017)

Those add for GTech cordless vacuum cleaners and lawn mowers and battery powered bicycles with Mr GTech in them make me laugh.
There he is, sounding all generic Southern until he gets to the price, only however many it is PAAAAHNDS. He goes all uber Cockney, like someone has asked Danny Dyer to take the piss out of his own self.


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## twentythreedom (Jul 9, 2017)

Espresso said:


> Those add for GTech cordless vacuum cleaners and lawn mowers and battery powered bicycles with Mr GTech in them make me laugh.
> There he is, sounding all generic Southern until he gets to the price, only however many it is PAAAAHNDS. He goes all uber Cockney, like someone has asked Danny Dyer to take the piss out of his own self.


Yeah those ads are shite. I bet the products are too.


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## scifisam (Jul 10, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> The new AA advert with the little girl in the car seat singing Proud Mary. Fucking hell, that is one appallingly shit ad



It's well into the uncanny valley. 

Though it's not as bad as the Haribo ads with the adults' voices dubbed over by kids' voices and the adults doing body language to match. Adults pretending to be little kids is never cute or funny, just creepy as fuck.


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## twentythreedom (Jul 10, 2017)

scifisam said:


> It's well into the uncanny valley.
> 
> Though it's not as bad as the Haribo ads with the adults' voices dubbed over by kids' voices and the adults doing body language to match. Adults pretending to be little kids is never cute or funny, just creepy as fuck.


It is really weird


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## cupid_stunt (Jul 10, 2017)

This one does my head in.


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## twentythreedom (Jul 10, 2017)

cupid_stunt said:


> This one does my head in.



Oh god yeah, just fucking horrifically awful, that one.


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## Nine Bob Note (Jul 10, 2017)

Kill it with likes, peeps


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## DotCommunist (Jul 10, 2017)

there is a spectre haunting late capitalism's millenials


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## trabuquera (Jul 11, 2017)

^ yeh the spectres of homelessness, unemployment and penury.

I'm annoyed by the current Braun electric shaver advert (can't even find it on YouTube/google it's that bad) which insists in all earnestness that *"Between waxes, life has to go on hold". *

 
It does? Really? 

Yeah because obviously if you've got hair growing anywhere, you can't be expected to get _anything _done. It's practically like being disabled.  Hairy pits? stubbly shins? It's a wonder you can still get down to the shops love.


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## gosub (Jul 11, 2017)

smmudge said:


> Some dyson advert
> 
> "Dirt and dust doesn't wait for the weekly big clean"
> 
> Don't fucking tell me how often to clean my house


But it does just sit there waiting, or have i just got really lazy dust?


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## brixtonblade (Jul 12, 2017)

trabuquera said:


> ^ yeh the spectres of homelessness, unemployment and penury.
> 
> I'm annoyed by the current Braun electric shaver advert (can't even find it on YouTube/google it's that bad) which insists in all earnestness that *"Between waxes, life has to go on hold". *
> 
> ...


I came here to post that one. Did a comedy double take when I heard that line.


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## Idaho (Aug 1, 2017)

Is there anything worse than the McDonald's advert for the chicken wrap where the boy spies the cool, alternative fast food maestro girl preparing his edgy meal as if she was a celebrity cocktail waitress? It makes me sad and angry.


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## Artaxerxes (Aug 2, 2017)

Idaho said:


> Is there anything worse than the McDonald's advert for the chicken wrap where the boy spies the cool, alternative fast food maestro girl preparing his edgy meal as if she was a celebrity cocktail waitress? It makes me sad and angry.


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## donkyboy (Aug 3, 2017)

cupid_stunt said:


> This one does my head in.




Is this real?


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## cupid_stunt (Aug 3, 2017)

donkyboy said:


> Is this real?



Yes.


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## twentythreedom (Aug 3, 2017)

Idaho said:


> Is there anything worse than the McDonald's advert for the chicken wrap where the boy spies the cool, alternative fast food maestro girl preparing his edgy meal as if she was a celebrity cocktail waitress? It makes me sad and angry.


That one does my head in too


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## twentythreedom (Aug 3, 2017)

Trivago woman is getting a bit tiresome now


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## emanymton (Aug 3, 2017)

That 'smallest bar in Amsterdam' one really annoys me. Ok so the bar can be bigger when. The canel is frozen. But there is no way that many people would have a chance of getting served.


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## gentlegreen (Aug 28, 2017)

Is it sexist to call this woman a vacuous, high maintenance bimbo - or at least acting the part with no apparent irony ?



Build Your Website Karlie Kloss - YouTube

And I'm fed up with the vacuous over-muscled *male* bimbo pushing the lawnmower too.



Visqueen Ultimate Latest News


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## Calamity1971 (Aug 28, 2017)

cupid_stunt said:


> This one does my head in.



And who shits Brown donuts?


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## gentlegreen (Aug 28, 2017)




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## twentythreedom (Aug 28, 2017)

TMI as usual for your posts gg


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## twentythreedom (Aug 28, 2017)

Calamity1971 said:


> And who shits Brown donuts?


It's like blowing smoke rings from your mouth, except it's done with shit and from your bumhole


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## Calamity1971 (Aug 28, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> It's like blowing smoke rings from your mouth, except it's done with shit and from your bumhole


Party trick tt?


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## Throbbing Angel (Aug 28, 2017)

I'm quite annoyed by the new Arthritis Research UK advert I've just seen. 

I saw a badly cut down version of this one - neither version is great and I get what they're trying to achieve (invisible illness/can affect anyone young or old/even dads/prisoners/the unemployed etc) but Mrs A and I were both so confused by what the cut down version was trying to do that we had to rewind it and watch again to see if we'd missed anything.

I'm only having a rant about this as I have PSA and have had to leave a couple of jobs because of it, can't do stuff etc etc etc


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## twentythreedom (Aug 28, 2017)

Calamity1971 said:


> Party trick tt?


Remind me not to come to any of your parties


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## gentlegreen (Oct 9, 2017)

WTF ??

 


Dove apologises for 'racist' Facebook advertising campaign


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## DotCommunist (Oct 9, 2017)

I saw that doing the rounds. How do you work in advertising and not have some idea of how that fucking reads?


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## twentythreedom (Oct 29, 2017)

Nat West - "We are what we do"

What, fucking banking shitcunts? Fuck off


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## T & P (Nov 1, 2017)

The new Tui holiday adverts with the woman singing Ain’t Nobody are fucking shit and starting to piss me off no end


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## Dr. Furface (Nov 2, 2017)

I've really had enough of that fucking stupid Kwiff advert with the bloke catching the glass and never letting it go. But it's been on so much that it did the job on me and I actually bothered to check the app out, because the idea is that it gives you more favourable betting odds. However, most of the reviews say that it's the biggest piece of shit, which just makes the advert even more annoying.


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## trabuquera (Nov 3, 2017)

Fairy Platinum's "No More Mr Nice Baby":


it doesn't make any sense! It massacres a musical classic! It has a fake Bob Hoskins voice in! And who the hell has ever got results from getting a baby to do the washing up anyway? I think if this worked, parenthood would be a smooth ride for most. Sounds like a good reason to call Childline to me.


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## rubbershoes (Nov 3, 2017)

For taking every last drop of soul out of the Rufus and Chaka Khan classic


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## twentythreedom (Nov 10, 2017)

Muller Rice. The 'I Got 5 On It' one. Just... NO ￼￼￼

So fucking awful


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## KeeperofDragons (Nov 11, 2017)

Tesco's 'every little helps' makes Mr Keeper incandescent


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## twentythreedom (Nov 13, 2017)

Wilkinson Sword Star Wars razors. WTAF


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## hash tag (Nov 13, 2017)

Every Christmas advert.


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## Gromit (Nov 30, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> Nat West - "We are what we do"
> 
> What, fucking banking shitcunts? Fuck off


Lloyds have out done them with their Cancer can be fun if we've got your back making sure you have money to spends on wigs.


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## Gromit (Nov 30, 2017)

How about the Currys one where they tell us that flat screen TVs are what Christmas is all about?

Grim.


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## twentythreedom (Nov 30, 2017)

The creepy stalker carrot one is a bit weird. "I pead* meself" 

*there was A PEA!!! Lols rofl etc. Aldi or Lidl. I'm too furious to check right now. 

Fuck off


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## gentlegreen (Nov 30, 2017)

Gromit said:


> Lloyds have out done them with their Cancer can be fun if we've got your back making sure you have money to spends on wigs.


Fecking hell - just had a look - I'm so glad I don't get to see adverts like that on a regular basis.


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## scifisam (Nov 30, 2017)

HSL chairs have idents before one of the programmes I watch and they're all ten second ads with old people saying one or two lines that are supposed to be funny. One's an old lady saying "Norman's in the shed. Along with all the other rubbish I don't want in the house" and smiling in a cruel way. That's not funny, that's horrible! What a way to sell your products - say that couples with long-term unhappy abusive marriages also like them.


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## hot air baboon (Dec 1, 2017)

could be a late winner here - I mean where do you start with this lot - on-line gambling - probably the spivviest business advertising outside pay-day loan sharks  ,its targetting female marks so its pink - & a motto most would associate with child abusers


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## gosub (Dec 1, 2017)

hot air baboon said:


> could be a late winner here - I mean where do you start with this lot - on-line gambling - probably the spivviest business advertising outside pay-day loan sharks  ,its targetting female marks so its pink - & a motto most would associate with child abusers
> 
> View attachment 121899


think the Ray Winston ones are more wtf  -  who can we get to make our gambling site seem as gangster as possible?


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## scifisam (Dec 1, 2017)

hot air baboon said:


> could be a late winner here - I mean where do you start with this lot - on-line gambling - probably the spivviest business advertising outside pay-day loan sharks  ,its targetting female marks so its pink - & a motto most would associate with child abusers
> 
> View attachment 121899



Because what gambling addicts really need is encouragement not to tell anyone


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## Dr. Furface (Dec 1, 2017)

gosub said:


> think the Ray Winston ones are more wtf  -  who can we get to make our gambling site seem as gangster as possible?


At least Ray says 'and we gamble responsibly at Bet365', not 'it's our little secret' ffs


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## passenger (Dec 2, 2017)

The sky cinema one with the little girl and her mum watching Mary Poppins
really makes want to puke up is it just me ?


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## gentlegreen (Dec 2, 2017)

passenger said:


> The sky cinema one with the little girl and her mum watching Mary Poppins
> really makes want to puke up is it just me ?


Well I suppose as Walt Disney goes it's fairly harmless ...

For some reason, though I grew up in a house with no TV or exposure to popular culture and didn't see MP / SOM until my 20s, I have got into the habit of saying "Cor Bloimey Mary Poppins" a lot - especially when it's windy ... 

Though I have to say, as someone who in other circumstances could be a grandparent by now, the whole "family tradition" thing is rather icky.


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## passenger (Dec 2, 2017)

gentlegreen said:


> Though I have to say, as someone who in other circumstances could be a grandparent by now, the whole "family tradition" thing is rather *icky.*



Cheers will take that Mr Green


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## Espresso (Dec 7, 2017)

The VIPoo people are now suggesting that you give it to people for a Christmas present.
They are having a laugh, surely.


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## QueenOfGoths (Dec 7, 2017)

Espresso said:


> The VIPoo people are now suggesting that you give it to people for a Christmas present.
> They are having a laugh, surely.


No...no they are not  Well this is "Poo Pourri" but same difference

Secret Santa Ornament – Poo~Pourri UK


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## campanula (Dec 10, 2017)

Espresso said:


> The VIPoo people are now suggesting that you give it to people for a Christmas present.
> They are having a laugh, surely.



Grief - you would really have to hate someone to give them that.


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## twentythreedom (Dec 17, 2017)

Fuck off, Johnny Depp, and your horrific aftershave advert  Fucking shit, and I'm sick of it you pompous cunt 

Wanker


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## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 17, 2017)

T & P said:


> The new Tui holiday adverts with the woman singing Ain’t Nobody are fucking shit and starting to piss me off no end



Yep.
She's really annoying.
And she sings like weak tea.


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## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 17, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> The creepy stalker carrot one is a bit weird. "I pead* meself"
> 
> *there was A PEA!!! Lols rofl etc. Aldi or Lidl. I'm too furious to check right now.
> 
> Fuck off



Aww I kind of like Kevin the carrot


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## twentythreedom (Dec 17, 2017)

bubblesmcgrath said:


> Aww I kind of like Kevin the carrot


His fate is already sealed


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## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 17, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> His fate is already sealed



In butter


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## Maggot (Dec 18, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> Fuck off, Johnny Depp, and your horrific aftershave advert  Fucking shit, and I'm sick of it you pompous cunt
> 
> Wanker


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## Calamity1971 (Dec 18, 2017)

.


bubblesmcgrath said:


> Aww I kind of like Kevin the carrot


Here ya go Bubbles, put it on ya christmas list


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## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 19, 2017)

Calamity1971 said:


> .
> 
> Here ya go Bubbles, put it on ya christmas list
> View attachment 123338


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## Calamity1971 (Dec 19, 2017)

Pure XS eau de toilet. 
A mass of women fainting at the sight of a curly haired bloke half naked (six pack) spraying his cheb end with an artificial scent.  
In fact, any shitting perfume/aftershave Xmas ad. Gorgeous people getting shagged on a boat, up a hill and dangling from a ceiling.


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## krtek a houby (Dec 13, 2018)

Just popped up on my FB feed. 



Got to be taking the piss (the pay, not the gig). That's £7.70 a day


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## Artaxerxes (Dec 14, 2018)

krtek a houby said:


> Just popped up on my FB feed.
> 
> View attachment 155415
> 
> Got to be taking the piss (the pay, not the gig). That's £7.70 a day



Japan doesn't strike me as the best place to have a job.


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## krtek a houby (Dec 14, 2018)

Artaxerxes said:


> Japan doesn't strike me as the best place to have a job.



Depends on what you do. It's the hours and the overworking that are the big thing here.


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## trabuquera (Dec 14, 2018)

"Alexa, play Dad's playlist" 


Because human grief is obviously best mediated via a bit of intrusive home electronics 

"Buy our product, it might make you feel a bit better when your family die"


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## Calamity1971 (Dec 14, 2018)

trabuquera said:


> "Alexa, play Dad's playlist"
> 
> Because human grief is obviously best mediated via a bit of intrusive home electronics



Winds me up no end that. Plus the tune is stuck in my head


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