# Is the Range Rover Sport the apex in arsehole wheels  ?



## not-bono-ever (Jan 21, 2017)

The ultimate Range Rover Poll...


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## Poi E (Jan 21, 2017)

"Overfinch" FTW.


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## not-bono-ever (Jan 21, 2017)

grrrrr


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## farmerbarleymow (Jan 21, 2017)

I don't know what one looks like - any chance of a picture?


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## cypher79 (Jan 21, 2017)

Katy Price has a pink one


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## Crispy (Jan 21, 2017)

yes


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## not-bono-ever (Jan 21, 2017)

dangerous cars- George Michael ( RIP) had mulitple incidents with his RR including losing control and crashing into a snappy snaps and falling out of one at 70 MPH on the motorway as the door had refused to shut properly


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## wiskey (Jan 21, 2017)

Poi E said:


> "Overfinch" FTW.



they are obscene


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## weltweit (Jan 21, 2017)

I think Jamie Oliver has one ... in fact I know he has or had.. black


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## felixthecat (Jan 21, 2017)

Nope. Range Rover Evoque takes that award...


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## Stanley Edwards (Jan 21, 2017)

Yes. It is, but something deep down inside my subconcious made me vote for the last option.



Then, I nearly changed my mind.


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## Brainaddict (Jan 21, 2017)

There's some serious competition in this category, not least from Ranger Rover's own Evoque and from the Porsche Cayenne. If we move away from SUVs I'd offer up that newish sporty Bentley as one you rarely see being driven by anyone other than a total prick.


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## Brainaddict (Jan 21, 2017)

What annoys me about the Bentley is that while most sports cars are small, this one is not, it's fucking massive, and is therefore totally inappropriate for the narrow streets of London - as are a bunch of the US sports cars, but we rarely see those.


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## butchersapron (Jan 21, 2017)

Brainaddict said:


> What annoys me about the Bentley is that while most sports cars are small, this one is not, it's fucking massive, and is therefore totally inappropriate for the narrow streets of London - as are a bunch of the US sports cars, but we rarely see those.


What do you drive brain addict?


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## weltweit (Jan 21, 2017)

You have to be careful no to drift into rampant envy when seeing a person driving cars which for people of average means are simply unobtainable.

I often ask myself, is that really a great car or is it just a knob driving a very expensive car.


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## Stanley Edwards (Jan 21, 2017)

These things make me spit and swear like nothing else even though I quite like cars.


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## Brainaddict (Jan 21, 2017)

butchersapron said:


> What do you drive brain addict?


Is this a chance to take another knock at me? I'm so flattered. I only have a car when work forces me to, but so far I've owned a Fiesta and then a Focus. I have a reasonably nice bike if that would give you a better chance to diss me? 

In fact, like the profligate JC, I currently own two bikes.


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## Brainaddict (Jan 21, 2017)

Stanley Edwards said:


> These things make me spit and swear like nothing else even though I quite like cars.
> 
> View attachment 99149


Oh yes, I'd forgotten those. I think they might be the winner actually.


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## butchersapron (Jan 21, 2017)

Brainaddict said:


> Is this a chance to take another knock at me? I'm so flattered. I only have a car when work forces me to, but so far I've owned a Fiesta and then a Focus. I have a reasonably nice bike if that would give you a better chance to diss me?


Checks out - loves the earth and all that. _Has a bike_. Nothing to 'diss'.


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## wiskey (Jan 21, 2017)

One of those daft Bentleys was parked outside the bowling alley the other day, I've not seen one before... It did at least have the decency to look a bit embarrassed at its ridiculousness sitting amongst the other cars.


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## beesonthewhatnow (Jan 21, 2017)

If I could afford a Range Rover I'd buy it. A proper one though, not the sport.


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## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 21, 2017)

Yes. They are probably shit in snow as well. 

However may I suggest that if you think snow is only two frosts a year you come spend some time in the high peak.


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## Brainaddict (Jan 21, 2017)

wiskey said:


> One of those daft Bentleys was parked outside the bowling alley the other day, I've not seen one before... It did at least have the decency to look a bit embarrassed at its ridiculousness sitting amongst the other cars.


My work takes me to west London and I can tell you that in parts of west London there's no need to feel embarassed by your stupid sporty Bentley because it might be parked next to another one, or next to a gold plated ferrari. I have actually seen a couple of these. They are actual things that people own. That's probably the real pinnacle of arseholedom-on-wheels to be honest, but there's so few of them around that perhaps it's not worth awarding them the prize.


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## Brainaddict (Jan 21, 2017)

The horror, the horror.


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## wiskey (Jan 21, 2017)

Brainaddict said:


> My work takes me to west London and I can tell you that in parts of west London there's no need to feel embarrassed by your stupid sporty Bentley...



Oh I'm sure but there's a world of difference between Sloane Sq and Megabowl just off the M5 in Bristol.Incongruous doesn't begin to cover it.


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## hash tag (Jan 22, 2017)

Technically the Bentley is not asports car, it's a GT.
I wouldn't disagree with the above, but would add this, especially in diesel or the lexus


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## Spymaster (Jan 22, 2017)

Brainaddict said:


> What annoys me about the Bentley is that while most sports cars are small, this one is not, it's fucking massive, and is therefore totally inappropriate for the narrow streets of London - as are a bunch of the US sports cars, but we rarely see those.


Nah, they just look chunky.

The footprint of a BCC is no bigger than a BMW 5 series or an E Class Merc. Probably a bit smaller than both.


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

I've been thinking about getting a Cayenne. My FIL tells me I need a five door car that's a bit taller and easier to get in and out. A Cayenne would match his opinion of what I need while completely contradicting his definition of a good car, (a Fiesta). If it wasn't so expensive I'd do it just to piss him off.


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## 2hats (Jan 22, 2017)

Cars for people called Wayne.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

American imports are probably peak arsehole. Extra points if modified in any way  whatsoever other than being cubed.






Then all that new money Knightsbridge shit like diplomatically immune Lamborghini Knockathadors as followed by a bunch of scum YouTubers, a sort of modern day Princess Diana wailers who we all know would jump at the chance to be Nazi collaborators if they were going to be sufficiently compensated in Reich-likes.

Then the RRS is on a par with or even slightly trailing all the other enormous SUVs in its class, (S)Q7 and ML63 and so on. The strange point of social convergence at which drug dealers,  slum landlords and school run mothers can't be differentiated. Bonus points if expensively modified to no benefit by Kahn or Overfinch etcetera. Or indeed not, and just having the badges added anyway.

Then anyone with some old shitbox and a phat exhaust who drives around residential areas at night at 40mph+ in second gear. The RRS crowd above could recoup a limited amount automotive of respect by gunning them all down in some sort of deal-gone-wrong/unpaid rent/parking-on-the-zigzags dispute.

Then angry dad in a ten year old Zafira.

Audi drivers are actually quite a long way down the list.


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## DotCommunist (Jan 22, 2017)




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## hash tag (Jan 22, 2017)




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## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 22, 2017)

Bentley does an SUV now






It's huge, like really fucking massive. Straight out of the Fuck-You-Oik school of automotive design.


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

hash tag said:


>


Is that a PCSO ignoring the so obviously illegally parked Audi? I'd take great pleasure ticketing any car so badly parked.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

A father of six 'little angles' being hosed down by emergency services after getting trapped for more than a minute behind someone doing a mere 34 in a 30, yesterday:


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Is that a PCSO ignoring the so obviously illegally parked Audi? I'd take great pleasure ticketing any car so badly parked.



The PCSO has clearly admired the classy motor and is walking away dreaming of the day when she can join the ranks of The Few.


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## hash tag (Jan 22, 2017)

The Audi got towed


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## DotCommunist (Jan 22, 2017)

b3ta has a few gems on this


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> The PCSO has clearly admired the classy motor and is walking away dreaming of the day when she can join the ranks of The Few.


Years ago I did a marketing project for VAG and, I have to say, Audi make great cars. It's a pity so many are driven by idiots. Same with BMW, good cars often driven by idiots. (I'm not saying you're an idiot, just that some drivers of Audi/BMW are)


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## hash tag (Jan 22, 2017)

Some, should that me most?


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Years ago I did a marketing project for VAG and, I have to say, Audi make great cars. It's a pity so many are driven by idiots. Same with BMW, good cars often driven by idiots. (I'm not saying you're an idiot, just that some drivers of Audi/BMW are)



A lot of arseholes are drawn to Audis and Beemers, they are priced at a point that will be affordable to estate agents and other scumbag sales-folk; people who are pretty selfish and shitty in all aspects of their lives, so no surprise that they drive like tossbags too.

MASSIVE generalisation there.


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## 2hats (Jan 22, 2017)

hash tag said:


> The Audi got towed


Is that just frost on it or paint stripper?


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## Spymaster (Jan 22, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Bentley does an SUV now
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Not a bad looking motor, I reckon


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

At least it looks less shit than the gopping concept:






What kind of name is 'Bentayga' though?


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## dylanredefined (Jan 22, 2017)

It is a strange car not exactly sure what goes through the mind of someone who buys one.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

Also every man and his dog makes ridiculous SUVs now. I should be slightly embarrassed by this one but it's just the new normal:





_Of course_ I need 500bhp to get up that tricky mountain pass to Waitrose.


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## Spymaster (Jan 22, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Also every man and his dog makes ridiculous SUVs now. I should be slightly embarrassed by this one but it's just the new normal:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I reckon that's the best looking one out there. Don't think that's embarrassing at all. Except for everything else about it


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Some, should that me most?


No. The majority of drivers drive properly. It's the loud, obvious twattery that gets noticed and we, I'm including myself here, generalise that the cars are mostly driven by twats.


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Also every man and his dog makes ridiculous SUVs now. I should be slightly embarrassed by this one but it's just the new normal:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


My mate's Bristol has 550. Just right for going anywhere quickly.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> I reckon that's the best looking one out there. Don't think that's embarrassing at all. Except for everything else about it


Well that's it isn't it (Maserati Levante looks OK too, FWIW) - it's a decent implementation of something stupid. A hundred years of making sporty saloons leading to this. Got to go where the market is unfortunately.


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## dylanredefined (Jan 22, 2017)

Stanley Edwards said:


> These things make me spit and swear like nothing else even though I quite like cars.
> 
> View attachment 99149


	Someone just decided to let their inner 10 year old choose their car. It is a very silly car, even sillier in the UK still as long as you can find somewhere to park it would be fun.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> My mate's Bristol has 550. Just right for going anywhere quickly.


550bhp in an antique museum piece made out of rust by some hobbyist in a British shed. What could _possibly_ go wrong?


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

mauvais said:


> 550bhp in an antique museum piece made out of rust by some hobbyist in a British shed. What could _possibly_ go wrong?


It goes well, stops well, and has good build quality. It's a very good car, especially when you place it alongside contemporaries. If I could justify it I'd buy it.


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## DownwardDog (Jan 22, 2017)

Objectively terrible cars that nobody should ever drive if they have a shred of self-respect:

VW Beetle (original and new)
Every Mustang ever built except for heavily modded Fox Bodies or the 6th gen GT350
Every Aston Martin (Vantage V12 might be ok...)
Any British sports car from a niche manufacturer (Nobel, Ultima, Morgan, etc.)
Anything diesel
Anything Swedish (except for a Koenigsegg of course)
Any Jaguar Land Rover product ever built (I had to buy two before I eventually got the message)


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## DownwardDog (Jan 22, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Well that's it isn't it (Maserati Levante looks OK too, FWIW) - it's a decent implementation of something stupid. A hundred years of making sporty saloons leading to this. Got to go where the market is unfortunately.



The RHD ones are diesel only and have a stupidly narrow driver's footwell.


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Not a bad looking motor, I reckon



I'd have one, if I had £200k to spunk on a car. But came across one driving the other way a couple of days ago, it's seriously big, like a fat fucker sat in an economy seat, it was spilling over in to my lane.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

What's wrong with Sweden, except for its traditional staple of biker-killing motorised barns?


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Objectively terrible cars that nobody should ever drive if they have a shred of self-respect:
> 
> VW Beetle (original and new)
> Every Mustang ever built except for heavily modded Fox Bodies or the 6th gen GT350
> ...


Apart from the comment about diesels I disagree with everything you've said.


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Apart from the comment about diesels I disagree with everything you've said.



Especially the Land Rover bit. Worst car I ever owned by fucking MILES.


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## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 22, 2017)

What's wrong with diesels?  Well other then the pollution thing.


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## pogofish (Jan 22, 2017)

Masarati's seem to have taken pole position as the car of choice for a certain kind of discerning mororised wanker round here recently.

Range Rovers, Audis etc are entry level or a shopping trolley for the wife/girlfriend.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

pogofish said:


> Masarati's seem to have taken pole position as the car of choice for a certain kind of discerning mororised wanker round here recently.
> 
> Range Rovers, Audis etc are entry level or a shopping trolley for the wife/girlfriend.


Where do you live, Monaco?


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## pogofish (Jan 22, 2017)

Aberdeen. Some people are still obviously doing ok - or trying too hard to look like it, despite the troubles and contraction in the oil biz and very flash cars have always been one of the ways they show-off.

But yeah, they were rare even here till just a few years ago, now they are getting as common as Porsches.


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> What's wrong with diesels?  Well other then the pollution thing.


That is the issue with them. That aside they are cheap to run in terms of fuel consumptio, but, because they need more servicing, not cheaper overall. They are more expensive to buy, the fuel, in the UK, is more expensive per litre. It's difficult to see any reason to buy one over an equivalent petrol.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

pogofish said:


> Aberdeen. Some people are still obviously doing ok - or trying too hard to look like it, despite the troubles and contraction in the oil biz and very flash cars have always been one of the ways they show-off.
> 
> But yeah, they were rare even here till just a few years ago, now they are getting as common as Porsches.


In part it's because they now make cheaper cars. The cheapest Maserati now is a £49k Ghibli or £53k Levante whereas before those came along it was probably an £80k Granturismo.


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## pogofish (Jan 22, 2017)

mauvais said:


> In part it's because they now make cheaper cars. The cheapest Maserati now is a £49k Ghibli or £53k Levante whereas before those came along it was probably an £80k Granturismo.



Its Granturismos mostly, then Cabrios or Quattroportes.


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## hash tag (Jan 22, 2017)

2hats said:


> Is that just frost on it or paint stripper?



Frost and note it  is still on the bonnet, because it's on the school run.


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## hash tag (Jan 22, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> It is a strange car not exactly sure what goes through the mind of someone who buys one.



Seriously.
Look at me, I've got money, no run of the mill motor for me or I buy Bentley because of the badge, it must be the best, besides, how else do I impress everyone at the golf club.

The stupidest value for money car could be the Aston cygnet!


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## kebabking (Jan 22, 2017)

If anyone thinks that the Range Rover Evoque is the world's greatest arsehole mobile, I bring news - LR have an Evoque convertible in development...

I saw a prototype - and yes, it was in white...


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 22, 2017)

kebabking said:


> If anyone thinks that the Range Rover Evoque is the world's greatest arsehole mobile, I bring news - LR have an Evoque convertible in development...
> 
> I saw a prototype - and yes, it was in white...



Wow, there'll be a queue of tasteless tossers going round the block for that.


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## Stanley Edwards (Jan 22, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Wow, there'll be a queue of tasteless tossers going round the block for that.



There will be a queue of people waiting with rotten tomatoes, bad eggs, pots of piss, or simply gob at ready in mouth also. A much longer queue I suspect. It defeats the psychology of the design of such cars - they are supposed to protect, and isolate you from the scum.


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## mauvais (Jan 22, 2017)

It's pretty much done:







Noone likes it, but the public will buy it.


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## 2hats (Jan 22, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Noone likes it, but the public will buy it.


Very community spirited of them to help out in an era of widespread public convenience closures.


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## not-bono-ever (Jan 22, 2017)

mrs NBE says it looks like a pram


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## 2hats (Jan 22, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> mrs NBE says it looks like a pram


Man-baby demographic catered for.


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

I love convertibles, but not this one.


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## pogofish (Jan 22, 2017)

hash tag said:


> The stupidest value for money car could be the Aston cygnet!



Maybe but I still think the Honda Crossroads was about the worst overall - largely because of the immense running costs for a landie in Japan!


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## Spymaster (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> It's difficult to see any reason to buy one over an equivalent petrol.


Well reasonably recent ones outperform many of their equivalent petrol versions, the fuel cost savings are extreme, they're not significantly more expensive to service, and if you bought one used, chances are someone else has worn the higher initial upfront purchase cost.


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Well reasonably recent ones outperform many of their equivalent petrol versions, the fuel cost savings are extreme, they're not significantly more expensive to service, and if you bought one used, chances are someone else has worn the higher initial upfront purchase cost.


Friend of mine with an engineering PhD says that diesels are a false economy due to maintenance costs etc. I believe him.


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## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Well reasonably recent ones outperform many of their equivalent petrol versions, the fuel cost savings are extreme, they're not significantly more expensive to service, and if you bought one used, chances are someone else has worn the higher initial upfront purchase cost.



Indeed. I've driven older desiels for years now. I've noticed servicing costs to be particularly high and the higher cost per liter is a red herring considering how much more economical they are. Plenty of cars with better performance then my ancient 3 series, but when you look at how much more gas they drink to do it then I'm happy enough. Still plenty quick enough for me at any rate.


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## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Friend of mine with an engineering PhD says that diesels are a false economy due to maintenance costs etc. I believe him.



Fortunately for me my real world experience has been otherwise.


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## not-bono-ever (Jan 22, 2017)

i have not experienced higher servicing costs for derv cars meself


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## Spymaster (Jan 22, 2017)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> Indeed. I've driven older desiels for years now. I've noticed servicing costs to be particularly high and the higher cost per liter is a red herring considering how much more economical they are. Plenty of cars with better performance then my ancient 3 series, but when you look at how much more gas they drink to do it then I'm happy enough. Still plenty quick enough for me at any rate.


Yeah, a lot of misunderstanding of diesel cars now. 10-20 years ago some of what Dess was saying was definitely the case but things have changed massively.


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## kebabking (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Well reasonably recent ones outperform many of their equivalent petrol versions, the fuel cost savings are extreme, they're not significantly more expensive to service, and if you bought one used, chances are someone else has worn the higher initial upfront purchase cost.



Indeed - as an example of the fuel efficiency, my 2010 2.0 deisel estate has a 70ltr fuel tank, on one tank I can do around 850 miles if I drive at under 80mph on the motorway, or about 750 miles if I do 90 or so from Worcester to Glasgow and back (630 mile round trip with some faff while I'm there). I'd be interested to see the petrol engine that delivers anything like that.

Worth noting that the difference in cost between petrol and diesel to fill my car is a mighty £2. That will just about buy a cup of tea at tebay services...


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## Stanley Edwards (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Well reasonably recent ones outperform many of their equivalent petrol versions, the fuel cost savings are extreme, they're not significantly more expensive to service, and if you bought one used, chances are someone else has worn the higher initial upfront purchase cost.



Diesel engines are more robust also. And, no electrics to fuck in the wet.


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

But how often do you have to service them compared to petrol?


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## Spymaster (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> But how often do you have to service them compared to petrol?


The same really. As long as you don't clog the DPF there's not much difference.


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Yeah, a lot of misunderstanding of diesel cars now. 10-20 years ago some of what Dess was saying was definitely the case but things have changed massively.



Mine is 3ltr bi-turbo. Its top speed is limited to 155, which even on an autobahn is a little bit faster than I would dare to go.

The S6 is .3 of a second quicker 0-60, limited to the same top speed. That's 4ltr petrol. Car tax* is £220 on ours, £450 on the S6.

Ours does around 25mpg in the real world, the S6 around 14.

There is a lot to be said for diesel, especially on larger cars.


*I know.


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## kebabking (Jan 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> But how often do you have to service them compared to petrol?



I do an oil change every 6,000 miles (£50), and a service every 12,000 (£120). That's overzealous, it would be perfectly happy with just a service every 12,000...


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## dessiato (Jan 22, 2017)

That's a good price. I pay less for my car, but I don't use the main dealer, and I'm in spain where prices are lower anyway.


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## not-bono-ever (Jan 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> The same really. As long as you don't clog the DPF there's not much difference.



Agreed- filter and oil once a year and as long as you thump the engine to get the DPF self cleaning now and then, then its no hassle. an hour on a M way once a month would keep the DPF clear- but sitting an average of 7mph in central London all day every day would not do it any good.

If you had to sart fucking with head gaskets and suchlik, then diesels are expensive, but they are bench tested to 250k miles these days before being released


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## DownwardDog (Jan 23, 2017)

Stanley Edwards said:


> Diesel engines are more robust also. And, no electrics to fuck in the wet.



What manner of energy operates the solenoids/piezos in diesel injectors? Magic?


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## kebabking (Jan 23, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> What manner of energy operates the solenoids/piezos in diesel injectors? Magic?



i use my insufferable smugness - it gets regenerated everytime i see some someone having to fill up with petrol for the third time that day...


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## dessiato (Jan 23, 2017)

This has just been released here. I like it.


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## weltweit (Jan 23, 2017)

dessiato said:


> This has just been released here. I like it.
> 
> View attachment 99279


Its front looks like a BMW but its back doesn't - what is it?


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## mauvais (Jan 23, 2017)

weltweit said:


> Its front looks like a BMW but its back doesn't - what is it?


Jaguar F-Pace.


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## beesonthewhatnow (Jan 23, 2017)

weltweit said:


> Its front looks like a BMW but its back doesn't - what is it?


Jaguar F-Pace


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## beesonthewhatnow (Jan 23, 2017)




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## mauvais (Jan 23, 2017)

It's the car for people that saw the F-Type, thought that yes, exactly what they want was raw, flawed and uncompromising, and then immediately thought that no, what they actually wanted was mediocre, boring and compromised... and I wish I was a little bit taller, wish I was a baller, etc...


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## mauvais (Jan 23, 2017)

kebabking said:


> i use my insufferable smugness - it gets regenerated everytime i see some someone having to fill up with petrol for the third time that day...


Even if you drove around at the national speed limit all day doing 24 hours of Le Mansfield you'd probably struggle to fill up thrice. I reckon to stand a chance of getting your niche fetish kicks you must be a drone pilot doing the rounds at Santa Pod Raceway as some hapless choad tries to do a bleep test version of a drag race in a Dodge Viper whilst towing a caravan with the aircon set at minus one million degrees. Or maybe you've just stuck a screwdriver through the fuel tank of your neighbour's Smart Fortwo. One or the other.


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## rubbershoes (Jan 23, 2017)

Saw an Evoque soft top today.  Jesus it's ugly







It might even be nastier than the PT cruiser cabrio


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## not-bono-ever (Jan 23, 2017)

pram

or a sit in drive around toy that a championship footballer buys for his 1 year old son

narsty


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## friendofdorothy (Jan 23, 2017)

I'm sure they are really handy to drive off road around your country estate. 

But they are just FUCKING ANNOYING for just swanning around London being too big for pedestrians to see over, generally taking up too much space and blocking up my street.


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## Saul Goodman (Jan 24, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Friend of mine with an engineering PhD says that diesels are a false economy due to maintenance costs etc. I believe him.


With all/any due respect to your friend, he/she doesn't know their arse from their elbow.


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## OzT (Jan 24, 2017)

I've just upgraded (relatively speaking) a year ago from my 1998 1.8i Escort I had for 9 years to a Mk 1 Focus TDDI. I'm also a bit anal on recording fuel consumption, and so far in 10 months I have nearly paid for the Focus's purchase price in fuel savings compared to if I still had the Escort for the mileage I've done. I brim the tank everytime and record how much used, and zeroize the odmeter. Average out about 520 miles a week I do.

As to diesel maintenance costs, doesn't bother me. I keep oil and water level up, and any other simple DIY running maintenances required, but as I only buy cheap cars if they run 2 years or more I always say they don't owe me a cent. If something happens that is costly, like my Escort when the head gasket blew, I just sell them. Cars with MOT usually do get brought even if there's other problems and you're willing to accept a reasonable price. Before the Escort I had a Clio that shred its cam belt, that sold as well.

My 2c worth


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## dessiato (Jan 24, 2017)

OzT said:


> I've just upgraded (relatively speaking) a year ago from my 1998 1.8i Escort I had for 9 years to a Mk 1 Focus TDDI. I'm also a bit anal on recording fuel consumption, and so far in 10 months I have nearly paid for the Focus's purchase price in fuel savings compared to if I still had the Escort for the mileage I've done. I brim the tank everytime and record how much used, and zeroize the odmeter. Average out about 520 miles a week I do.
> 
> As to diesel maintenance costs, doesn't bother me. I keep oil and water level up, and any other simple DIY running maintenances required, but as I only buy cheap cars if they run 2 years or more I always say they don't owe me a cent. If something happens that is costly, like my Escort when the head gasket blew, I just sell them. Cars with MOT usually do get brought even if there's other problems and you're willing to accept a reasonable price. Before the Escort I had a Clio that shred it's cam belt, that sold as well.
> 
> My 2c worth


There use to be a website called Bangernomics which advocated what you are doing and had some good advice on basic running and maintenance.


----------



## mauvais (Jan 24, 2017)

Saul Goodman said:


> With all/any due respect to your friend, he/she doesn't know their arse from their elbow.


A combination of modern environmental controls and extracting more power from diesels has made maintenance more of a liability. A DPF/EGR/swirl flap etc failure can give you serious costs and there's not really a parallel on petrol cars except maybe direct injection. Then there's turbos, DMFs etc, which are all expensive too (although you might well have turbos on petrols now).


----------



## rubbershoes (Jan 25, 2017)

rubbershoes said:


> Saw an Evoque soft top today.  Jesus it's ugly
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Just found out it's a friend who's bought the one I saw. I may have to be diplomatic


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jan 25, 2017)

</thread>


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 25, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> </thread>



Not quite... Saudi registered, Lambo engined, Batmobile replica driven by Team Galag on Gumball.


----------



## dylanredefined (Jan 25, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> </thread>





DownwardDog said:


> Not quite... Saudi registered, Lambo engined, Batmobile replica driven by Team Galag on Gumball.



 These are fun toys which are of no practical use unlike the range rover sport is not going to be regularly annoying other road users by failing to park or sitting in the middle lane without a clue and then changing lane at the very last moment. Driving that 6 wheel thing through a city is punishment enough for its owner.


----------



## dylanredefined (Jan 25, 2017)

rubbershoes said:


> Saw an Evoque soft top today.  Jesus it's ugly
> 
> 
> 
> ...








 easily fixed. Hopefully, they are fun to drive as people will be laughing at you.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 25, 2017)

This place is going to the dogs, I tell thee..



Spoiler: Apex-arsehole-motor


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 25, 2017)

rubbershoes said:


> Just found out it's a friend who's bought the one I saw. I may have to be diplomatic



"Can I have some of the drugs you were on when you chose that car please mate?"


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 25, 2017)

the filth had Mway RR's back in the 70's to be fair. Their spunker credentials are long established


----------



## SikhWarrioR (Jan 26, 2017)

Stanley Edwards said:


> These things make me spit and swear like nothing else even though I quite like cars.
> 
> View attachment 99149



Humvees bah Save up £300k and buy yourself a Marauder as demonstrated by Richard Hammond on Top Gear


----------



## weltweit (Jan 26, 2017)

I do object to Range Rover Sports, pushing a barn door through the air just confirms that the owner cares not a jot for fuel efficiency, ditto also for BMW M5, Porsche Cayenne & Audi Q whatever. And there is that aspect of if or when I am in an accident me and mine will be fine, it is others that will be killed!


----------



## SikhWarrioR (Jan 26, 2017)

rubbershoes said:


> Saw an Evoque soft top today.  Jesus it's ugly
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Think I will stick with my Series 1 with the ragtop and roofsticks over that and my Series 1 looks better than that bloatmobile


----------



## Sweet FA (Jan 27, 2017)

weltweit said:


> BMW M5


?


----------



## weltweit (Jan 27, 2017)

Is it an X5 then?


----------



## Sweet FA (Jan 27, 2017)

weltweit said:


> Is it an X5 then?


If you refer to the brilliantly excellent massive SUV 4x4 type motors, then yes.


----------



## T & P (Jan 28, 2017)

Sweet FA said:


> If you refer to the brilliantly excellent massive SUV 4x4 type motors, then yes.


 My boss owns an X5, which I have driven fairly often. I really don't get the appeal of it. Despite his claim of being a very useful car for a family with three young kids, the interior is surprisingly small for such a voluminous car.

I really do hate Chelsea Tractors, so perhaps I'm not the most impartial of observers. But seriously, what's the bloody point of them? If space is the issue, estate cars offer far more of it, as well as better performance and fuel economy I suspect- at least the German carmaker offerings.


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 28, 2017)

A friend of mine had an X5 for years. It's a smooth, comfortable, powerful, car. I enjoyed driving it. The driving position is great and it feels big and safe around you. Pointless in London but I'd consider one if I lived in the sticks and needed to ford streams, or just needed a reliable motor to carry a family up and down motorways.

I've been considering a Lexus RX400h as my next car. Not sure yet.


----------



## bubblesmcgrath (Jan 28, 2017)

A girl I work with has one of these.
She looks like a little child driving it.
It takes up a lot of space in the car park as we have to double park...and her monster never leaves enough room for others.

But ...I wouldn't say no to a lift home in it....just to see what all the fuss is about


----------



## weltweit (Jan 28, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> A friend of mine had an X5 for years. It's a smooth, comfortable, powerful, car. I enjoyed driving it. The driving position is great and it feels big and safe around you. Pointless in London but I'd consider one if I lived in the sticks and needed to ford streams, or just needed a reliable motor to carry a family up and down motorways.
> 
> I've been considering a Lexus RX400h as my next car. Not sure yet.


It is big and safe, for the people inside it, at the expense of those outside it including those in normal sized cars!


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 28, 2017)

weltweit said:


> It is big and safe, for the people inside it, at the expense of those outside it including those in normal sized cars!


That's a stupid reason not to buy one if it's suitable for other reasons. They're engineered to crumple up to the same standards as any other car. Only a dickhead would avoid buying one because "it gives my occupants an unfair advantage in an accident". And is an SUV any more dangerous to others in an accident than a builders van or large estate car?

Stupid argument which could be applied to E Class Merc drivers compared to those in smaller cars, or Mondeo occupants compared to Smart car passengers.


----------



## weltweit (Jan 28, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> That's a stupid reason not to buy one if it's suitable for other reasons. They're engineered to crumple up to the same standards as any other car. Only a dickhead would buy one because "it gives my occupants an unfair advantage in an accident". And is an SUV any more dangerous to others in an accident than a builders van or large estate car? ..


corrected for you


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 28, 2017)

Silly man.


----------



## mauvais (Jan 28, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> That's a stupid reason not to buy one if it's suitable for other reasons. They're engineered to crumple up to the same standards as any other car. Only a dickhead would avoid buying one because "it gives my occupants an unfair advantage in an accident". And is an SUV any more dangerous to others in an accident than a builders van or large estate car?
> 
> Stupid argument which could be applied to E Class Merc drivers compared to those in smaller cars, or Mondeo occupants compared to Smart car passengers.


They are significantly more dangerous, because aside from the mass, they're higher and therefore normal cars with crash resistance designed around similar height vehicles come off badly in accidents. Thus it becomes an arms race.


----------



## Sweet FA (Jan 28, 2017)

I've had a few petrol estates & the X5 has more capacity & is cheaper to run than my last one (Mondeo). I drive to southern Spain & France at least 3 or 4 times a year with large dog+child+a fuckton of camping gear. It is more comfortable, more stable at high speeds, much less thirsty & generally a more pleasant place in which to spend 9-11 hours.

welty, you're being a berk 

Otoh, I can't quite shake the feeling that I look like a massive wanker in it. Or the nagging sense that They Saw Me Coming with tyres at 280 quid. Each.


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 28, 2017)

mauvais said:


> They are significantly more dangerous, because aside from the mass, they're higher and therefore normal cars with crash resistance designed around similar height vehicles come off badly in accidents. Thus it becomes an arms race.


Not the point. Of course there's a disparity in the relative safety of different cars, but in it's natural habitat, out of town, an X5 is also likely to run into something its own size or similar. And it's already an arms race and always has been. A Micra driver mixing it with Bahnhof Strasse and his 2 ton armoured shooting break is going to come second, as would a moped rider hitting the Micra. It's a very easily defeated argument and usually used by those with an agenda against SUVs.


----------



## mauvais (Jan 28, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Not the point. Of course there's a disparity in the relative safety of different cars, but in it's natural habitat, out of town, an X5 is also likely to run into something its own size or similar. And it's already an arms race and always has been. A Micra driver mixing it with Bahnhof Strasse and his 2 ton armoured shooting break is going to come second, as would a moped rider hitting the Micra. It's a very easily defeated argument and usually used by those with an agenda against SUVs.


If I had to be hit by a car whilst in one, I'd much rather it was something with the same window line. Not sure about as a pedestrian, probably the same.


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 28, 2017)

mauvais said:


> If I had to be hit by a car whilst in one, I'd much rather it was something with the same window line.


Depends on everything else. I'd rather be hit by an X5 at 30mph than Bahnhoff at 50, and SUV's are generally driven more sedately than sports saloons/estates, etc etc ... 

There's far more to it than the height of the vehicles.


----------



## dylanredefined (Jan 28, 2017)

SikhWarrioR said:


> Think I will stick with my Series 1 with the ragtop and roofsticks over that and my Series 1 looks better than that bloatmobile


 Probably more comfortable, but, you could say that about water boarding.


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Especially the Land Rover bit. Worst car I ever owned by fucking MILES.



Best car I ever had, LR Discovery, TDI,  had it 16 years from nearly new, 240k on the clock and the engine and gearbox still in reasonable condition but the dreaded 'chassis rust' got her in the end.


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Friend of mine with an engineering PhD says that diesels are a false economy due to maintenance costs etc. I believe him.


Never mind the cost, the pollution is the main reason for not driving them, got rid of mine as soon as the pollution reports started coming out.


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> Indeed. I've driven older desiels for years now. I've noticed servicing costs to be particularly high and the higher cost per liter is a red herring considering how much more economical they are. Plenty of cars with better performance then my ancient 3 series, but when you look at how much more gas they drink to do it then I'm happy enough. Still plenty quick enough for me at any rate.


Servicing costs? Drove diesel land rovers for donkeys, oil, grease and filters at regular intervals and the jobs a good'un.


----------



## sleaterkinney (Jan 28, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Depends on everything else. I'd rather be hit by an X5 at 30mph than Bahnhoff at 50, and SUV's are generally driven more sedately than sports saloons/estates, etc etc ...
> 
> There's far more to it than the height of the vehicles.


They're driven more slowly as they can't get up to speed because there isn't the room on the road...

Range Rover Evoque is probably the apex, there's no mitigating factors in owning that, but BMWs, Audi's etc are more common, so you're more likely to be cut up by one.


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

Saul Goodman said:


> With all/any due respect to your friend, he/she doesn't know their arse from their elbow.


Aye, there's a lot of people over at VW telling the US EPA just that


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> </thread>


Hammond, of TG fame had me piss boiling when he drove one of these in the UAE and claimed it to be the first of its kind, LR had a very  similar vehicle in production donkeys years ago for airport fire services, a RR six wheel variant if memory serves.


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Not quite... Saudi registered, Lambo engined, Batmobile replica driven by Team Galag on Gumball.


Bugger, at first glance thought it was a souped up ferret ARV


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> These are fun toys which are of no practical use unlike the range rover sport is not going to be regularly annoying other road users by failing to park or sitting in the middle lane without a clue and then changing lane at the very last moment. Driving that 6 wheel thing through a city is punishment enough for its owner.


Westminster council has clagged  an extra £4 an hour parking  for diesels, why don't all citys charge a congestion charge for all and every 4x4 and similar entering their areas?
4x4s can be necessary, but never in an urban environment, tax the bastards out of existence (in cities, that is)


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> easily fixed. Hopefully, they are fun to drive as people will be laughing at you.


Series 2? Looking at the bumper.


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

weltweit said:


> I do object to Range Rover Sports, pushing a barn door through the air just confirms that the owner cares not a jot for fuel efficiency, ditto also for BMW M5, Porsche Cayenne & Audi Q whatever. And there is that aspect of if or when I am in an accident me and mine will be fine, it is others that will be killed!


When you buying your Nissan Leaf  then Wellie?


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

SikhWarrioR said:


> Think I will stick with my Series 1 with the ragtop and roofsticks over that and my Series 1 looks better than that bloatmobile


Pics?


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> Probably more comfortable, but, you could say that about water boarding.



Any one driving a LR with a canvas hood has probably lots of experience of being waterboarded


----------



## coley (Jan 28, 2017)

sleaterkinney said:


> They're driven more slowly as they can't get up to speed because there isn't the room on the road...
> 
> Range Rover Evoque is probably the apex, there's no mitigating factors in owning that, but BMWs, Audi's etc are more common, so you're more likely to be cut up by one.


Used to curse all BMWs, Mercedes etc as the worst of all drivers but the real problem is most drivers of mid/upper performance cars are, and I very rarely use the word, utter cunts.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 29, 2017)

coley said:


> Hammond, of TG fame had me piss boiling when he drove one of these in the UAE and claimed it to be the first of its kind, LR had a very  similar vehicle in production donkeys years ago for airport fire services, a RR six wheel variant if memory serves.



The 6 wheel Range Rovers were conversions by Carmicheal and weren't 6x6 (like the AMG) but were only 6x4. We had a couple of these (called TACR or some such bollocks) at Leuchars and I lived in mortal fear of being trapped in a burning cockpit and having to rely on rescue from one of these contraptions as it took up to an hour to get them started in the winter months. Not ideal for a crash tender.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 29, 2017)

coley said:


> Best car I ever had, LR Discovery, TDI,  had it 16 years from nearly new, 240k on the clock and the engine and gearbox still in reasonable condition but the dreaded 'chassis rust' got her in the end.



Discos do seem well made. Had a Freelander and the engine exploded after 23k miles and again a year later. £13k car sold two years later for £1k.

Land Rover flatly denied there was a problem, mate of mine worked on BBC Watchdog and they did a thing on them, but by then it was too late to get anything back for our piece of shite.

Will never again line Land Rover's pockets with my hard earned.


----------



## coley (Jan 29, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Discos do seem well made. Had a Freelander and the engine exploded after 23k miles and again a year later. £13k car sold two years later for £1k.
> 
> Land Rover flatly denied there was a problem, mate of mine worked on BBC Watchdog and they did a thing on them, but by then it was too late to get anything back for our piece of shite.
> 
> Will never again line Land Rover's pockets with my hard earned.


Totally agree, replaced the Disco with a Freelander, very nice to drive but mechanically? Heap,of Shyte.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 30, 2017)

coley said:


> Totally agree, replaced the Disco with a Freelander, very nice to drive but mechanically? Heap,of Shyte.



I met a friend of mine for a fishing day on the Tyne about a year ago, he drives a freelancer - when we'd finished for the day we threw all the crap in the back of the cars and went to the pub.

Well, I say 'threw', my rod went seemlessly sideways into the estate boot without touching the sides, his on the other hand was a rather more complex affair with the fucking thing going in at all angles and eventually having to go lengthways and into the passenger foot well.

It's not a car, it's a fucking glovebox on wheels..


----------



## hash tag (Jan 30, 2017)

The makers know thier market. 

"I want a car that reall reflects my personality" says Victoria who goes on to say

"I brought a naivety to this project because I have never designed a car before. But it feels real!


"When I first started working with the team I did a lot of research, and created mood boards to show the team my love of timeless and classic design. I looked at yachts, luxury jets and classic cars"


The dashboard features  the exclusive rose gold-plated interior highlights, including on air-conditioning  knobs....this exclusive baby off roader is yours for £80K.







Perfect for the nanny to take the kiddies to school in London.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 30, 2017)

From todays standard; a typical London street scene (Primrose Hill?). How many fails can you spot?


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 30, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Had a Freelander and the engine exploded after 23k miles and again a year later. £13k car sold two years later for £1k.


You spent 13 grand on a FREELANDER!!!!


----------



## snadge (Jan 30, 2017)

Decent SUVs do what they are supposed to do very well, Range Rover Sports and Porsche Cayennes especially so, driving extremely quickly on shitty desert roads comfortably, that they have been appropriated for use in suburban environments is a by product, that is in fact, the sign of an arse.


----------



## mauvais (Jan 30, 2017)

snadge said:


> Decent SUVs do what they are supposed to do very well, Range Rover Sports and Porsche Cayennes especially so, driving extremely quickly on shitty desert roads comfortably, that they have been appropriated for use in suburban environments is a by product, that is in fact, the sign of an arse.


Only as an overarching trend. In terms of specific cars, most SUVs as sold would be wholly inadequate for unmade roads let alone off-road exploration.


----------



## snadge (Jan 30, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Only as an overarching trend. In terms of specific cars, most SUVs as sold would be wholly inadequate for unmade roads let alone off-road exploration.




Standard Cayennes in the desert.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 30, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> You spent 13 grand on a FREELANDER!!!!




Worst thing evah.

But it could and did get amps and genny off the Ridgeway the long way thus avoiding da Po-Po on more than one occasion. Which a A6 wouldn't be able to do...


----------



## kebabking (Jan 30, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Only as an overarching trend. In terms of specific cars, most SUVs as sold would be wholly inadequate for unmade roads let alone off-road exploration.



agreed - the only '4x4' thing most SUV's are any good at is handling snow, and only then if they have winter tyres on.

the LR Discoverys' are good in sopping wet, muddy fields, as are the Range Rovers, but ground clearance means the disco is better if you go further off road than that (or perhaps people who've spent £70K on a car are a bit more circumspect about what they do with it..). Nissan Pathfinder seems to be the next leap, but they are much less comfortable doing the 350 mile motorway trip to Edinburgh for the weekend.

thinking about getting a Pathfinder actually, its far too big and heavy - not to mention fuel guzzling - for a normal use car, but the towing, the 4x4, the off road ability and the 7 seats would make it a useful addition to the stable. think of it as a hobby...


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 30, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Worst thing evah.
> 
> But it could and did get amps and genny off the Ridgeway the long way thus avoiding da Po-Po on more than one occasion. Which a A6 wouldn't be able to do...


But what was the thought process that led you to think that spending 13k on a Freelander was a good idea?

Was it some kind of _Brewster's Millions _challenge?


----------



## dessiato (Jan 30, 2017)

hash tag said:


> From todays standard; a typical London street scene (Primrose Hill?). How many fails can you spot?


She's proof of the saying "only the rich can afford to be thin." Won't someone feed her?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 30, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> But what was the thought process that led you to think that spending 13k on a Freelander was a good idea?
> 
> Was it some kind of _Brewster's Millions _challenge?



I was taking a lot of drugs at that point in my life.


----------



## noodles (Jan 30, 2017)

Modern pickups.. "Barbarian", "Warrior".

You're not a barbarian or a warrior, you're a cunt.


----------



## coley (Jan 30, 2017)

kebabking said:


> I met a friend of mine for a fishing day on the Tyne about a year ago, he drives a freelancer - when we'd finished for the day we threw all the crap in the back of the cars and went to the pub.
> 
> Well, I say 'threw', my rod went seemlessly sideways into the estate boot without touching the sides, his on the other hand was a rather more complex affair with the fucking thing going in at all angles and eventually having to go lengthways and into the passenger foot well.
> 
> It's not a car, it's a fucking glovebox on wheels..



And totally impossible for DIY repairs and servicing, which was one of the big draws for LR owners, and frigging useless in snow with its stupid monoqouke body styling, can't spell thon frenchie  word but I expect you know I mean


----------



## coley (Jan 30, 2017)

kebabking said:


> agreed - the only '4x4' thing most SUV's are any good at is handling snow, and only then if they have winter tyres on.
> 
> the LR Discoverys' are good in sopping wet, muddy fields, as are the Range Rovers, but ground clearance means the disco is better if you go further off road than that (or perhaps people who've spent £70K on a car are a bit more circumspect about what they do with it..). Nissan Pathfinder seems to be the next leap, but they are much less comfortable doing the 350 mile motorway trip to Edinburgh for the weekend.
> 
> thinking about getting a Pathfinder actually, its far too big and heavy - not to mention fuel guzzling - for a normal use car, but the towing, the 4x4, the off road ability and the 7 seats would make it a useful addition to the stable. think of it as a hobby...



The only things I use my RR for is off road towing and snow, bit of a sod these mild winters, but during the bad snow of 2010 the freelander was totally useless, ended up carrying hay for the best part of a mile.
ETA, at least my son was


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 31, 2017)

Heh, was an Audi SQ7 in the car park this morning when walking the dog. Surely a contender here. If I had £80k to spend I'd consider it...


----------



## kebabking (Jan 31, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Heh, was an Audi SQ7 in the car park this morning when walking the dog. Surely a contender here. If I had £80k to spend I'd consider it...



dunno, surely one of the joys of driving one of the big, rufty-tufty SUV's is the 'go anywhere, do anything, who cares aboutscuffing it with hedges, bits of fence post and a random sheep' freedom - if you spent £80k on it you'd be a bit frantic about every mark, mud splash, shaking wet dog and disgusting child wiping its snotty bogies on the seats?

theres also the fact that my first house cost about £80k...

it could go in the arsehole catagory though - i suppose the litmus test is how many premiership footballers own one...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 31, 2017)

kebabking said:


> dunno, surely one of the joys of driving one of the big, rufty-tufty SUV's is the 'go anywhere, do anything, who cares aboutscuffing it with hedges, bits of fence post and a random sheep' freedom - if you spent £80k on it you'd be a bit frantic about every mark, mud splash, shaking wet dog and disgusting child wiping its snotty bogies on the seats?
> 
> theres also the fact that my first house cost about £80k...
> 
> it could go in the arsehole catagory though - i suppose the litmus test is how many premiership footballers own one...



My first place cost £62k...

But yeah, would be a bit worried about fucking it, although current car has to deal with kids, dog and country lanes and we're not too bothered, so perhaps these things are relative to how much money you've got?

And yeah, footballers is a good test.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jan 31, 2017)

If you can afford 80k on a car you can afford not to worry about scratches.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 31, 2017)

kebabking said:


> thinking about getting a Pathfinder actually, its far too big and heavy - not to mention fuel guzzling - for a normal use car, but the towing, the 4x4, the off road ability and the 7 seats would make it a useful addition to the stable. think of it as a hobby...



We've got a Y62 Nissan Patrol and it is easily the most capable off road vehicle I've ever driven. However, at 100mph with a trailer full of motocross bikes it gets 9mpg and it has the most vulgar interior in the history of the automotive industry. It's like driving along in the lobby of the Baku Sheraton.


----------



## Dogsauce (Jan 31, 2017)

noodles said:


> Modern pickups.. "Barbarian", "Warrior".
> 
> You're not a barbarian or a warrior, you're a cunt.



The first time I saw one of those barbarian pick ups I properly pissed myself laughing for several minutes. It might as well have said 'Impotence' in big letters on the side. Men of a certain age and all that...


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 31, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> ... it has the most vulgar interior in the history of the automotive industry. It's like driving along in the lobby of the Baku Sheraton.


It's one of the biggest munters on the road on the exterior too, tbf!


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 1, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> It's one of the biggest munters on the road on the exterior too, tbf!



Ours is in the worst colour too, "Arabic Racing Gold".


----------



## Spymaster (Feb 1, 2017)

I reckon that's marginally better than one in "Dubai" White.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Feb 1, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> I reckon that's marginally better than one in "Dubai" White.



Who doesn't want to drive something that basically looks like a fridge?


----------



## Spymaster (Feb 1, 2017)

I had the misfortune to work in the UAE on and off for a few years and most of the hotels had those ^^^ for airport pick-ups and for taking the local Sheikhs to and from the knocking shops and coke dealers. They were all white, but the really tasteful ones had gold plated handles, grills, and badges.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 1, 2017)

Wot, no humble volvo, the ultimate in luxury SUV? These things are huge in the flesh


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 1, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Wot, no humble volvo, the ultimate in luxury SUV? These things are huge in the flesh



They're stupidly expensive and have daft little four cylinder engines which won't tow trailers full of motocross bikes at 100mph+ like the Patrol (5.6 V8).


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 1, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> I reckon that's marginally better than one in "Dubai" White.



We ordered a white one and it was going to be two months, then four months, then six months. So I said to the sales reptile that if he knocked $2k off I'd take one in any colour.

Nissan scored an absolute bullseye with this vehicle; their target demo (my wife) loves it.


----------



## High Voltage (Feb 1, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> . . . Nissan scored an absolute bullseye with this vehicle; their target demo (my wife) loves it.



Ride a lot of MotoX does she? 



> However, at 100mph with a trailer full of motocross bikes . . .


----------



## pogofish (Feb 1, 2017)

Spotted this parked in the centre of Munich - A hydrogen powered 4WD..!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 1, 2017)

What's the point in that? SUV's are supposed to run on pandas and orphans.


----------



## mauvais (Feb 1, 2017)

It's probably for the flammenwerfings.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Feb 1, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> What's the point in that? SUV's are supposed to run on pandas and orphans.



Fuck you, you fucking fuck!!!


----------



## dylanredefined (Feb 1, 2017)

Dogsauce said:


> The first time I saw one of those barbarian pick ups I properly pissed myself laughing for several minutes. It might as well have said 'Impotence' in big letters on the side. Men of a certain age and all that...



 Got to drive one of those for a couple of days till I put a dent in it. Ideal if you need to chuck a bunch of stuff in a huge boot bit of a bastard turning round in a country lane though.


----------



## kebabking (Feb 1, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> Got to drive one of those for a couple of days till I put a dent in it. Ideal if you need to chuck a bunch of stuff in a huge boot bit of a bastard turning round in a country lane though.



We use the L200's on the training areas - I enjoy driving them, they feel much more competent off road (and on...) than the old Defenders, and they are much more comfortable to do long journeys in.

I did Gloucester to Cape Wrath in one last year - it would have been more comfortable and quieter in a normal car, but the thought of doing it in a landy would bring me out in hives....


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 2, 2017)

High Voltage said:


> Ride a lot of MotoX does she?



She's no Livia Lancelot and won't be cleaning any 10m doubles but she can rip a reasonable wheelie on a DR125.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 2, 2017)

Walking the streets of Wandsworth earlier, in total contrast to all the usual tractors, I saw someting similar to this, and it was in need of care. Forget air con, radio's Etc. If you want that big motor with a high driving position and style.....


----------



## Dieselpunk2000 (Feb 7, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> </thread>


That looks like the desert Jeep that the Hood drove(and usually crashed) in Thunderbirds-


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 8, 2017)

Now availble with V12 biturbo power, Maybach trim and a landaulet roof for extra obnoxiousness.


----------



## Dieselpunk2000 (Feb 8, 2017)

These things are the ride of choice for boorish arseholes around the wilds of deepest Herefordshire. Followed closely by 13-year old Vauxhall Zafiras with hi-viz jackets on the parcel shelf.


----------



## Spymaster (Feb 8, 2017)

Dieselpunk2000 said:


> These things are the ride of choice for boorish arseholes around the wilds of deepest Herefordshire. Followed closely by 13-year old Vauxhall Zafiras with hi-viz jackets on the parcel shelf.View attachment 100129


Don't the army use those?


----------



## hash tag (Feb 8, 2017)

Vehicle of choice for builders, innit.


----------



## kebabking (Feb 8, 2017)

You don't have to pay VAT on them, hence the popularity.

Very popular with builders, farmers, plumbers etc... because you can carry a massive load in the back, get it from the road across the horribly muddy site, and then do a three hour motorway trip in almost saloon-like comfort.

Surfing crowd like them for the same reasons...


----------



## hash tag (Feb 8, 2017)

A thing like that can't be nearly cool enough for the surfers


----------



## kebabking (Feb 9, 2017)

DP - bloody phone...


----------



## Dieselpunk2000 (Feb 9, 2017)

There's also an enormous amount of these things around as well-
 
It does the school run, carries tools, tailgates you and takes the kids, the dog and the surfboards to Cornwall once a year.


----------



## dylanredefined (Feb 9, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> Don't the army use those?



Yes or something similiar as defenders are slowly ageing and no longer being made and the various armoured off road veicles are overkill for just driving around. Probably an mbe for anyone who can get MOD just to buy some hi luxes.


----------



## A380 (Feb 12, 2017)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Feb 12, 2017)

Dieselpunk2000 said:


> There's also an enormous amount of these things around as well-
> View attachment 100172
> It does the school run, carries tools, tailgates you and takes the kids, the dog and the surfboards to Cornwall once a year.



I wouldn't mind one of them


----------



## kebabking (Feb 12, 2017)

I'm going to buy a Shogun or a Pathfinder (or something else...) as a weekend car.

Having fun with snow at the moment - I use winter tyres, but winter tyres on a front wheel drive will only go so far, and something with a bit more ground clearance would be nice...

£5k or so, needs to be capable of carrying two adults and three kids in reasonable comfort with the normal 900 tons of crap, 30+ mpg at 60mph would be best, reliability is a big thing. Not fussed about looks or badge, just practicality, reliability, ease of ownership and ability to handle snow, wet feilds and forestry roads.

I can see on auto trader that I can get a 55 plate Shogun with 100k on the clock for £3k - any tips on makes/models to avoid or go for and things to look out for..?


----------



## DotCommunist (Feb 12, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> Probably an mbe for anyone who can get MOD just to buy some hi luxes.


vehicle  of choice for the islamic 'state' fighters we know as daesh


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 12, 2017)

kebabking said:


> I'm going to buy a Shogun or a Pathfinder (or something else...) as a weekend car.
> 
> Having fun with snow at the moment - I use winter tyres, but winter tyres on a front wheel drive will only go so far, and something with a bit more ground clearance would be nice...
> 
> ...



Avoid Land Rover.

Don't get the import Shogun, Paejero means Wanker in Spanish.


----------



## kebabking (Feb 12, 2017)

Yeah, LR is out - both for reliability and the mark-up...

I'm assuming that it'll be a Japanese - Mitsubishi/Isuzu etc...


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Feb 12, 2017)

kebabking said:


> I'm going to buy a Shogun or a Pathfinder (or something else...) as a weekend car.
> 
> Having fun with snow at the moment - I use winter tyres, but winter tyres on a front wheel drive will only go so far, and something with a bit more ground clearance would be nice...
> 
> ...



The snow will be gone soon!


----------



## kebabking (Feb 12, 2017)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> The snow will be gone soon!



Where I go, snow can be at any time from November to the end of April - and even then I still want something to do the non-tarmac stuff...


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 12, 2017)

everyone in iceland has Toyotas, i usually rent a RAV4 or suchlike , but the bigger Toyos seem to be popular as well- maybe see what people who live in these places favour


----------



## kebabking (Feb 12, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> everyone in iceland has Toyotas, i usually rent a RAV4 or suchlike , but the bigger Toyos seem to be popular as well- maybe see what people who live in these places favour



Cheers - everyone in the Falklands drives the Japanese jobs.


----------



## hippogriff (Feb 13, 2017)

kebabking said:


> I'm going to buy a Shogun or a Pathfinder (or something else...) as a weekend car.
> 
> Having fun with snow at the moment - I use winter tyres, but winter tyres on a front wheel drive will only go so far, and something with a bit more ground clearance would be nice...
> 
> ...



We've got a 53 plate Shogun Elegance 3.2 DiD that we've had for about 5 years. It's the seven seater, and with seven up there's not a huge amount of luggage space, but plenty of room for five + luggage. Ours is an automatic, as most of them are, and we do get around 30 mpg out of it on average, when not towing. We were looking for a vehicle to tow a caravan, and the Mitsubishi was less agricultural than things like Landcruisers or Troopers; it's got leather, heated seats, air-con. sunroof etc.
Parts are expensive, as are tyres, but that will be the same for any equivalent vehicle. Timing chain, rather than belt, which is good, but the timing chain guide at the top of the engine can wear and you need to keep an eye on it. 4wd needs to be exercised regularly, both high and low ratio, else the switches on the gearbox / transfer box seize. Same with diff lock.
Mechanically it's been very reliable, with the single exception of the auto box having to be rebuilt (at a cost of £2.5k) which was just bad luck, generally the gearboxes are as reliable as the rest of the mechanicals, and to be fair the gearbox didn't completely expire until I'd parked up at the local independent auto box specialist. It was still driving, not well, but driving, up to that point, when they had to push it into the workshop.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 13, 2017)

Still hankering after a good, no nonsense Defender? There may be a new kid on the block soon Has Land Rover left a gap for a UK car company?


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 13, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Still hankering after a good, no nonsense Defender? There may be a new kid on the block soon Has Land Rover left a gap for a UK car company?



The answer is, obviously, no. The Hilux/L200 own that market segment now and they are assembled in low cost countries like Thailand.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 13, 2017)

You Can Have Land Rover's Best Range Rover Ever—For a Price

FFS

the world is truly broken


----------



## hash tag (Feb 14, 2017)

This is what a Chelsea tractor/Lamborghini  should look like, and better equipped to cope with London speeds. With an estimate of just £22,000, she cold be yours






This extremely slow Lamborghini could be yours for £22,000


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 22, 2017)

hold yer horses

new RR announced. it is called the Velar. Could be the new arsehole wheels of 2017- if definitely will be the arsehole wheels of 2021 , when depreciation has knocked 70% off its 2016 new price


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 22, 2017)

Vulva?


----------



## hash tag (Feb 23, 2017)

It's difficult not to laugh at this Driver fined for leaving wheel inches out of space in near-empty car park


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 23, 2017)

hash tag said:


> It's difficult not to laugh at this Driver fined for leaving wheel inches out of space in near-empty car park



Prefer: Station carpark to be repainted after commuter proves spaces are too small

Gonna cost Southwest Trains £1000's


----------



## hash tag (Feb 23, 2017)

Nah. Someone who has a car so big they are either unable to park it properly or too lazy or selfish to do so!


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 23, 2017)

*furious*


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 23, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Nah. Someone who has a car so big they are either unable to park it properly or too lazy or selfish to do so!



Spaces are too small these days though. Paid £30 to park for 5 hours in Brighton last weekend, touched the wall with the nose of the car and still the back end was sticking out of the space. And when we returned there was a car in the space next to us so we had to back out to get the youngest kid in to the car. For 30 quid would expect my shoes cleaned or something as well as a space large enough for a car to actually fit in to.


----------



## kabbes (Feb 23, 2017)

hash tag said:


> It's difficult not to laugh at this Driver fined for leaving wheel inches out of space in near-empty car park


I'm glad he got a ticket, because there was no reason whatsoever for him not to park courteously.  He just didn't give a fuck.  Well now he does.


----------



## kabbes (Feb 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Prefer: Station carpark to be repainted after commuter proves spaces are too small
> 
> Gonna cost Southwest Trains £1000's


That's food for thought.  If I still parked in Dorking Station car park instead of parking over a mile away because I finally just had enough of it, I might pursue the same action.  Those spaces are ok if you're in something Panda-sized, but not much else.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Feb 23, 2017)

I struggle to park our S-Max in a lot of places now. Spaces just haven't kept up with modern cars.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Spaces are too small these days though. Paid £30 to park for 5 hours in Brighton last weekend
> 
> 
> Or the car is too big? Clearly, you have never parked at the 02 for a gig!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 23, 2017)

Oh, and have that!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 23, 2017)

Audi A6, hardly a fucking Hummer.

And no, not parked at the O2 for a gig


----------



## kabbes (Feb 23, 2017)

I received a series of increasingly hysterical and arguably illegal letters from an escalation of parties after Indigo decided I had not parked in a legal bay at Dorking Station during a Southern Strike.  I ignored them all.  In the end, it all passed the statute of limitations.  Fuck them and their strong-arm tactics designed to terrify people into paying something they have no duty to pay.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 23, 2017)

kabbes said:


> I received a series of increasingly hysterical and arguably illegal letters from an escalation of parties after Indigo decided I had not parked in a legal bay at Dorking Station during a Southern Strike.  I ignored them all.  In the end, it all passed the statute of limitations.  Fuck them and their strong-arm tactics designed to terrify people into paying something they have no duty to pay.



Oddest thing about my victory over Parking Eye on 2nd February is that on 1st February they sent this:


----------



## kabbes (Feb 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Oddest thing about my victory over Parking Eye on 2nd February is that on 1st February they sent this:
> 
> View attachment 101029


The gratifying thing is the knowledge that it has cost them money every time they send something to you.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 23, 2017)

kabbes said:


> The gratifying thing is the knowledge that it has cost them money every time they send something to you.



Yeah. It may have cost them a bit more had they not capitulated. Here's my letter to them:


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 23, 2017)

They used to send me notice of attendance county court letters, all filled in but never stamped or issued by the court- naughty . I scrawled fuck off in perm marker across it and sent them back with no stamp.


----------



## kabbes (Feb 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Yeah. It may have cost them a bit more had they not capitulated. Here's my letter to them:
> 
> View attachment 101030


It's a nice idea, but you would have to show it was actually costing you £150 + VAT per letter.  You could get away with £20 per letter though, no problem.  I have used that threat myself in the past.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 23, 2017)

kabbes said:


> It's a nice idea, but you would have to show it was actually costing you £150 + VAT per letter.  You could get away with £20 per letter though, no problem.  I have used that threat myself in the past.



I run my VAT registered business from the address the car is registered to. I can easily show that 30 minutes of my time is worth £150 and as it is a service that amount is subject to VAT. I think including my company registration number and VAT number at the bottom of the letter may have helped...


----------



## pogofish (Feb 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Oddest thing about my victory over Parking Eye on 2nd February is that on 1st February they sent this:
> 
> View attachment 101029



Parking Eye are notorious for doing shit like this.


----------



## dylanredefined (Feb 23, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Still hankering after a good, no nonsense Defender? There may be a new kid on the block soon Has Land Rover left a gap for a UK car company?



 Or you could see a therapist for your delusions that there is such a thing as a good no nonsense defender


----------



## A380 (Feb 23, 2017)

This from and entitled knob on Facebook about parking outside schools, most of the comments were not supportive...


----------



## hash tag (Mar 3, 2017)

If a Range Rover is not bad enough, I have just seen one crawling along Chelsea Embankment with a reg 81G, pure class!
I also saw the reg NOT 2B again this morning, this time being driven. I will forgive this one as it was one of a pair, owned by a thespian. Their other car, an Aston (?) has a reg 2B or similar, which is fair enough.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 3, 2017)

A380 said:


> This from and entitled knob on Facebook about parking outside schools, most of the comments were not supportive...
> 
> 
> 
> View attachment 101036



The thing about kids right, is that most of them have legs.


----------



## T & P (Mar 3, 2017)

hash tag said:


> If a Range Rover is not bad enough, I have just seen one crawling along Chelsea Embankment with a reg 81G, pure class!
> I also saw the reg NOT 2B again this morning, this time being driven. I will forgive this one as it was one of a pair, owned by a thespian. Their other car, an Aston (?) has a reg 2B or similar, which is fair enough.


I once saw a Range Rover parked in Chelsea that had the plate 10 MPG. I have never been so close to keying a car. I never saw it again even though I'm in Chelsea every day, so I'd like to think the owner had the car vandalised so many times they decided to switch the number plate for one that didn't scream "I'm a complete and utter cunt".


----------



## weltweit (Mar 3, 2017)

I was overtaken on the M5 once by a red Porsche with the numberplate "KN0B 1"


----------



## kebabking (Mar 5, 2017)

Seen today...

White RR Evoque convertible at the supermarket - for reference it has a tiny, tiny boot that gets filled by a few bags of shopping.

The occupants were a middle aged man in sports clothing and a wig, and his lady friend.

The registration plate was RR66 +++.

I expected nothing less.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 5, 2017)

Just back from lunch in a very busy pub, had to park on the road cos of these fuckers...


----------



## hash tag (Mar 5, 2017)

At least that looks like the countryside as opposed to chelsea 
mind you, they don't exactly look covered in mud.
Next time you may wish to choose your places more carefully.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 5, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Just back from lunch in a very busy pub, had to park on the road cos of these fuckers...
> 
> View attachment 101596


I'd have parked behind the white one.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 5, 2017)

Yeah, shame as the food was good, how can you park like that and walk away even if the car park is empty, but this place was stoked. Selfish fucks.


----------



## likesfish (Mar 5, 2017)

Even the the other  merc and audi owner think your a knob because they managed to park properly. This some sort of arseholey cubed?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 5, 2017)

what a fuckin wanker.


----------



## T & P (Mar 5, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Just back from lunch in a very busy pub, had to park on the road cos of these fuckers...
> 
> View attachment 101596



I believe websites such as this are grateful for photograph contributions like your image...


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 7, 2017)

Mercedes Is Making World's Most Expensive SUV

$500k SUV

look at the fucking state of that


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 7, 2017)

T & P said:


> I believe websites such as this are grateful for photograph contributions like your image...


 

not that I advocate this, but his tyres are about 400 a corner. a bit of side wall damage could make it a very expensive lunch


----------



## kabbes (Mar 7, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> Mercedes Is Making World's Most Expensive SUV
> 
> $500k SUV
> 
> look at the fucking state of that


I don't get it.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 7, 2017)

Does it represent good value to you Kabbes ?


----------



## kabbes (Mar 7, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> Does it represent good value to you Kabbes ?


It doesn't represent good _anything.
_
It doesn't even have good headlights.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 7, 2017)

has thermal cup holders though.


----------



## A380 (Mar 7, 2017)

I have a hypothesis to test:  a minority ( but a large minority c 20/30% ) of Chelsea Tractor drivers buy  them because they are shit drivers* and actually have enough self awareness to know that they are lacking in driving ability. They therefore make a selfish trade off that, rather than a. Improve or b, stop driving they buy a car in the hope that if they have an accident they won't get as hurt asthey would in another car.

Discuss.

* I reackon that about 60% of all town and city based users of 4x4s are sub average drivers, just not all realise it...


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 7, 2017)

A380 said:


> I have a hypothesis to test:  a minority ( but a large minority c 20/30% ) of Chelsea Tractor drivers buy  them because they are shit drivers* and actually have enough self awareness to know that they are lacking in driving ability. They therefore make a selfish trade off that, rather than a. Improve or b, stop driving they buy a car in the hope that if they have an accident they won't get as hurt asthey would in another car.
> 
> Discuss.
> 
> * I reackon that about 60% of all town and city based users of 4x4s are subs average drivers, just not all realise it...



I think the higher driver position creates a feeling of power that in turn leads to cuntish driving, particularly towards cyclists. I think that's why people buy them, to salve a deep-seated inferiority complex. I'm not sure anyone buys a range rover so they can more easily slaughter other road users, although in some cases this may be a contributing factor.

There's no fucking reason for most people to have one of these things. They take up too much space and burn too much petrol. Society should not have to accommodate your pathetic attempts to cover up for your disappointing career, failing marriage and loathsome children.


----------



## A380 (Mar 7, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> I think the higher driver position creates a feeling of power that in turn leads to cuntish driving, particularly towards cyclists. I think that's why people buy them, to salve a deep-seated inferiority complex. I'm not sure anyone buys a range rover so they can more easily slaughter other road users, although in some cases this may be a contributing factor.
> 
> There's no fucking reason for most people to have one of these things. They take up too much space and burn too much petrol. Society should not have to accommodate your pathetic attempts to cover up for your disappointing career, failing marriage and loathsome children.


Get of the fence, fan of 4x4s or not?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 7, 2017)

A380 said:


> Get of the fence, fan of 4x4s or not?



I'm a big fan of the old Land Rover Defender. Heated seats, parking sensors, sat nav and all that shit you get nowadays completely defeat the purpose of a 4x4, which is to do things involving mud and weather and stuff.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 7, 2017)

A380 said:


> I have a hypothesis to test:  a minority ( but a large minority c 20/30% ) of Chelsea Tractor drivers buy  them because they are shit drivers* and actually have enough self awareness to know that they are lacking in driving ability. They therefore make a selfish trade off that, rather than a. Improve or b, stop driving they buy a car in the hope that if they have an accident they won't get as hurt asthey would in another car.
> 
> Discuss.
> 
> * I reackon that about 60% of all town and city based users of 4x4s are sub average drivers, just not all realise it...


Most of the ones I see in town are driven by women and are probably considered useful for school runs.

I've driven a few, mainly X5's and Lexus, and they're enjoyable to drive. The driving position is comfortable, you see loads more than in a car, and they feel quite solid. I'd buy one if I spent hours a week bonking up and down motorways with several people or carrying loads of kit, but I don't really do that much.


----------



## ska invita (Mar 7, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> I think the higher driver position creates a feeling of power that in turn leads to cuntish driving, particularly towards cyclists. I think that's why people buy them, to salve a deep-seated inferiority complex. I'm not sure anyone buys a range rover so they can more easily slaughter other road users, although in some cases this may be a contributing factor.
> 
> There's no fucking reason for most people to have one of these things. They take up too much space and burn too much petrol. Society should not have to accommodate your pathetic attempts to cover up for your disappointing career, failing marriage and loathsome children.


since this thread ive realised just how many of these things there are over london..everywhere it seems...and im not talking about in chelsea im talking about sc/se london...
definitely agree its a status/height thing
who can afford the petrol, never mind the car? loads of people it would seem


----------



## ska invita (Mar 7, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Just back from lunch in a very busy pub, had to park on the road cos of these fuckers...
> 
> View attachment 101596


theres a house in sydenham i walked past the other day with FOUR range rovers in the drive  all in black


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 7, 2017)

ska invita said:


> theres a house in sydenham i walked past the other day with FOUR range rovers in the drive  all in black



Those Mi5 safe houses are not as low key as they used to be back in the 70's


----------



## ska invita (Mar 7, 2017)

£110 to fill one up supposedly
Range Rover Full Tank - How Much £? - Page 1 - General Gassing - PistonHeads


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 7, 2017)

Give me a normal sized hatchback any day. Something with a turning circle not measured in light years. Something that fits in parking spaces. Something that doesn't have the capacity to accelerate twice as fast as any driver on any actual road could ever need to.


----------



## Sweet FA (Mar 7, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> I think the higher driver position creates a feeling of power that in turn leads to cuntish driving, particularly towards cyclists. I think that's why people buy them, to salve a deep-seated inferiority complex. I'm not sure anyone buys a range rover so they can more easily slaughter other road users, although in some cases this may be a contributing factor.
> 
> There's no fucking reason for most people to have one of these things. They take up too much space and burn too much petrol. Society should not have to accommodate your pathetic attempts to cover up for your disappointing career, failing marriage and loathsome children.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 8, 2017)

Spymaster's right, driving position is the thing with the 4x4. It's relaxing being up there, able to see far ahead. The same as driving a Transit. If it were all about status then folk wouldn't be buying Pajerios and Patrols.

Many 4x4's are no bigger than a large estate and I find the A6 lushious to drive on motorways and on small country roads, which the 4x4's are not so good at, lurching from side to side like a ship in a storm.



Mercedes GLs, there's a contender...


----------



## Teaboy (Mar 8, 2017)

I'm not sure about this whole driving height thing anymore.  Everywhere I look people are driving SUV's etc so that kind of negates the advantage.

Personally I just think when men get to a certain age they can't bend down so its easier to get into a higher vehicle.  Obviously male ego dictates that it has to be another reason that's the car they've gone for.......


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 8, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> Give me a normal sized hatchback any day. Something with a turning circle not measured in light years. Something that fits in parking spaces. Something that doesn't have the capacity to accelerate twice as fast as any driver on any actual road could ever need to.


Boring.

And acceleration isn't about_ need_, it's about _want_.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 8, 2017)

Teaboy said:


> I'm not sure about this whole driving height thing anymore.  Everywhere I look people are driving SUV's etc so that kind of negates the advantage.
> 
> Personally I just think when men get to a certain age they can't bend down so its easier to get into a higher vehicle.  Obviously male ego dictates that it has to be another reason that's the car they've gone for.......



My dad has a Lexus 4x4 thing and is fine to admit it's cos getting in and out of just my A6 is a pain for him.

Not long ago went to Newlands Corner on a Sunday morning, was a Lotus convention going on, was well funny watching loads of blokes in their fifties cracking their spines trying to get in cars a fag paper's height off the road...


----------



## mauvais (Mar 8, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It's relaxing being up there, able to see far ahead. The same as driving a Transit.


Ah yes, the famously relaxed Transit driver.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 8, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Ah yes, the famously relaxed Transit driver.



Well no, but that's cos of the oppressive capitalist system paying per delivery, forcing the van-man to drive aggressively or have his children starve...


----------



## weltweit (Mar 8, 2017)

I had a lift in a Discovery some time back and the driver used to drive right up the boot of the car in front looking over them at what happened in the far distance. It was very bad driving and quite intimidating for the car in front. I didn't enjoy my lift.


----------



## mauvais (Mar 8, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Well no, but that's cos of the oppressive capitalist system paying per delivery, forcing the van-man to drive aggressively or have his children starve...


Or because of the high driving position that allows him to see the infinite futility of existence.

Regard:


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 8, 2017)




----------



## OzT (Mar 8, 2017)

Only in white


----------



## A380 (Mar 8, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


>


Who is he?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 8, 2017)

A380 said:


> Who is he?


----------



## mauvais (Mar 8, 2017)

Put Pickers in a go-kart and he'd be all sweetness and light, I reckon.

As Sartre once said, in the wobbly blancmange of the Picasso, all is hatred.


----------



## kebabking (Mar 8, 2017)

A white Range Rover Sport, with the reg plate 5WAG, is parked like a blind cunt outside school.

You invited, perhaps privately, to speculate on the nature of the driver


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 8, 2017)

kebabking said:


> A white Range Rover Sport, with the reg plate 5WAG, is parked like a blind cunt outside school.
> 
> You invited, perhaps privately, to speculate on the nature of the driver




?








twentythreedom ruffneck23  ??


----------



## hash tag (Mar 9, 2017)

.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 9, 2017)

mauvais said:


> Or because of the high driving position that allows him to see the infinite futility of existence.
> 
> Regard:






The Hairy Cornflake?


----------



## Dogsauce (Mar 9, 2017)

From my casual observations when pedalling about London it appears that some new kind of muscular-looking Maserati has taken over from the Bentley Continental as the car of choice for top-end wankers (younger members of oil dynasties and 'successful property developers').


----------



## Sweet FA (Mar 12, 2017)

Saw this on the way home from work last week...


----------



## T & P (Mar 12, 2017)

I'm surprised they managed to get it past the DVLA


----------



## dylanredefined (Mar 12, 2017)

A380 said:


> I have a hypothesis to test:  a minority ( but a large minority c 20/30% ) of Chelsea Tractor drivers buy  them because they are shit drivers* and actually have enough self awareness to know that they are lacking in driving ability. They therefore make a selfish trade off that, rather than a. Improve or b, stop driving they buy a car in the hope that if they have an accident they won't get as hurt asthey would in another car.
> 
> Discuss.
> 
> * I reackon that about 60% of all town and city based users of 4x4s are sub average drivers, just not all realise it...


 Or their poor skills are magnified by driving a huge 4*4 



SpookyFrank said:


> I'm a big fan of the old Land Rover Defender. Heated seats, parking sensors, sat nav and all that shit you get nowadays completely defeat the purpose of a 4x4, which is to do things involving mud and weather and stuff.


   A joy off road a nightmare on it.


----------



## Mr Moose (Mar 12, 2017)

I spotted this a few weeks back. A bit more U75.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 12, 2017)

Mr Moose said:


> I spotted this a few weeks back. A bit more U75.



I like to imagine this car was bought by a Jamaican person as a gift for David Jason.


----------



## iamwithnail (Mar 13, 2017)

Spotted a range rover being driven like a prick this morning, with the numberplate of COU 55S, presumably a banker.  What an utter fucking bellend.



Dogsauce said:


> From my casual observations when pedalling about London it appears that some new kind of muscular-looking Maserati has taken over from the Bentley Continental as the car of choice for top-end wankers (younger members of oil dynasties and 'successful property developers').



Eta:  I had not insignificant schadenfreude when I saw one of those scrape along a very expensive Merc last week, mentioned it somewhere else.  All low speed and no one hurt, but very, very expensive looking.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 13, 2017)

In a pub car park somewhere near Derby at the weekend  (of course some people often have these things because they cant actually drive/park).


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 13, 2017)

hash tag said:


> In a pub car park somewhere near Derby at the weekend  (of course some people often have these things because they cant actually drive/park).View attachment 102180



The Porsche Cayenne is every bit the Range Rover's equal in terms of twattishness of drivers IME. No rational person would buy one. For a start it's basically the same car as a VW Touareg but worse and more expensive. So even someone stupid enough to buy a crossover, ie a vehicle which dispenses with the useful attributes of both 4x4 and hatchback to create a pointless compromise between the two, would have to be extra stupid to buy a Cayenne.

This is probably why I see so many Cayennes parked outside the private school up the road. The thinking goes like this: I'm the kind of moron who buys a Porsche cayenne, therefore my kids will have inherited moron genes, therefore I'd better get them the best education money can buy to try counteract their natural deficiencies. Tragically, as any encounter with a private school student will illustrate, this strategy doesn't work.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 13, 2017)

Hmmm.....   Drivers are Clarkson Parking to protect cars from 'clowns who can’t park or drive' | Daily Mail Online



> Doing a Clarkson: New trend for posh car drivers to DELIBERATELY park across two bays to protect their beloved vehicles from 'clowns who can't park or drive'


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 13, 2017)

That fuck interviewed in the article is a fuck.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 13, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> That fuck interviewed in the article is a fuck.



He's not even got a particularly impressive motor:



> Mr Vardy's Vauxhall Astra, which boasts 280bhp and goes from 0-60mph in 5.9 seconds, guzzles £50 in petrol money every single week



Our car has 330bhp, 0-60 in 5 seconds and guzzles £80 in diesel every week. So there


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 13, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> For a start it's basically the same car as a VW Touareg but worse and more expensive.


They share some parts but they're far from the same car; the petrol engines are different for starters. But yes, Cayennes are shit.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 13, 2017)

However you look at it, an Audi is still an Audi.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 13, 2017)

hash tag said:


> However you look at it, an Audi is still an Audi.



You are of course correct. Audis are all quality cars driven by discerning people with above average IQs and driving skills.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 13, 2017)

Oh I kid (love) myself!


----------



## dessiato (Mar 13, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> They share some parts but they're far from the same car; the engines are different for starters. But yes, Cayennes are shit.


I was looking at buying one later in the year. Mrs D, though, isn't keen on the idea.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 13, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> You are of course correct. Audis are all quality cars driven by discerning people with above average IQs and driving skills.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 13, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> You are of course correct. Audis are all quality cars driven by discerning people with above average IQs and driving skills.


All be it several years ago, I did a marketing research project for Audi. I learned that they are good cars, but over priced and not worth the money. I enjoyed the Quatro that they gave me though. At the time I also was given a 928 S4 by the Porsche dealer to "see what (I) thought of it." Halcyon summer days.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 13, 2017)

dessiato said:


> All be it several years ago, I did a marketing research project for Audi. I learned that they are good cars, but over priced and not worth the money. I enjoyed the Quatro that they gave me though. At the time I also was given a 928 S4 by the Porsche dealer to "see what (I) thought of it." Halcyon summer days.



They are overpriced, but that keeps the riff-raff away, so no bad thing...

We needed a large car, 2 kids one of which was in a buggy (those things take up a shit-load of space) and a gangly lurcher. I wanted it to be a bit sporty, be loaded with gadgets and comfortable on long drives. What would you go for that fits the bill?


----------



## snadge (Mar 13, 2017)

dessiato said:


> All be it several years ago, I did a marketing research project for Audi. I learned that they are good cars, but over priced and not worth the money. I enjoyed the Quatro that they gave me though. At the time I also was given a 928 S4 by the Porsche dealer to "see what (I) thought of it." Halcyon summer days.



I got a 57 plate Audi A4 2.0 TDI Quattro 170BHP Sline special editon with all the gubbins fitted for 3k, if you look around second hand audis are a bargain


----------



## iamwithnail (Mar 13, 2017)

I"d make a point of scratching that dickbag's car if I saw it around.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 13, 2017)

iamwithnail said:


> I"d make a point of scratching that dickbag's car if I saw it around.


Bahnhof Strasse can be annoying occasionally but there's no need take it out on his motor.


----------



## snadge (Mar 13, 2017)

iamwithnail said:


> I"d make a point of scratching that dickbag's car if I saw it around.




Are you referring to me?


----------



## hash tag (Mar 13, 2017)

If you want a name without so much arrogance, but happy to pay a premium, a mere. If you want practical, Hyundai or Skoda or Honda or Mazda, or......


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 13, 2017)

snadge said:


> Are you referring to me?



It does read that way, but I presume he's referring to the chap in the Mail article.


----------



## snadge (Mar 13, 2017)

hash tag said:


> If you want a name without so much arrogance, but happy to pay a premium, a mere. If you want practical, Hyundai or Skoda or Honda or Mazda, or......



There is only one contender for cars that last a long time with over engineered parts, that is German cars, Skoda are decent but the components are not over engineered at all, they do compete with the best of the rest though as do the cheaper VW's, over engineered components means you are not replacing shit every couple of thousand miles like shitty fords and vauxhalls.

Although both vauxhall and ford have realised that built in obsolescence does not sell cars so they are far better built than 10 years ago.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 13, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> They are overpriced, but that keeps the riff-raff away, so no bad thing...
> 
> We needed a large car, 2 kids one of which was in a buggy (those things take up a shit-load of space) and a gangly lurcher. I wanted it to be a bit sporty, be loaded with gadgets and comfortable on long drives. What would you go for that fits the bill?


I would probably have gone for a Mercedes. But, i don't have kids or a dog so i don't really know as that is a long way out of my remit.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 13, 2017)

dessiato said:


> I would probably have gone for a Mercedes. But, i don't have kids or a dog so i don't really know as that is a long way out of my remit.



We looked at the Mercs, very nice too. The large estate they do that has a bit of poke is the E63 AMG, that has similar performance to the A6 we ended up with, (the Merc is a tad faster 0-60). The Merc is a 5.5ltr petrol, our A6 is a 3ltr diesel. Seems like a lot of extra engine being used in the Merc. And the deal-breaker was the clock, looks really out of place and old fashioned. Little thing for sure, just put me right off.



Spoiler: The clock


----------



## dessiato (Mar 13, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> We looked at the Mercs, very nice too. The large estate they do that has a bit of poke is the E63 AMG, that has similar performance to the A6 we ended up with, (the Merc is a tad faster 0-60). The Merc is a 5.5ltr petrol, our A6 is a 3ltr diesel. Seems like a lot of extra engine being used in the Merc. And the deal-breaker was the clock, looks really out of place and old fashioned. Little thing for sure, just put me right off.


I can relate to that. I always though the Jag S-type was old fashioned compared to the X-type. The trim details were wrong on the S-type


----------



## snadge (Mar 13, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> We looked at the Mercs, very nice too. The large estate they do that has a bit of poke is the E63 AMG, that has similar performance to the A6 we ended up with, (the Merc is a tad faster 0-60). The Merc is a 5.5ltr petrol, our A6 is a 3ltr diesel. Seems like a lot of extra engine being used in the Merc. And the deal-breaker was the clock, looks really out of place and old fashioned. Little thing for sure, just put me right off.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



That has to be a fucking British thing, fuck that clock, no wonder I have never bought a merc, looked at them but there was always something that put me off, they have made it omnipresent in that fucking clock though, fuck off, yer German not Swiss.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 13, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> And the deal-breaker was the clock, looks really out of place and old fashioned. Little thing for sure, just put me right off.
> 
> 
> 
> ...





snadge said:


> That has to be a fucking British thing, fuck that clock, no wonder I have never bought a merc, looked at them but there was always something that put me off, they have made it omnipresent in that fucking clock though, fuck off, yer German not Swiss.



That's a fucking lovely clock, though I wouldn't expect a pair of Audi wankers to appreciate it.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 13, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> That's a fucking lovely clock, though I wouldn't expect a pair of Audi wankers to appreciate it.



Chav


----------



## ska invita (Mar 13, 2017)

amazing how much these cars say about your personality


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

ska invita said:


> amazing how much these cars say about your personality



Yeah, like phrenology.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 14, 2017)

snadge said:


> There is only one contender for cars that last a long time with over engineered parts, that is German cars, Skoda are decent but the components are not over engineered at all, they do compete with the best of the rest though as do the cheaper VW's, over engineered components means you are not replacing shit every couple of thousand miles like shitty fords and vauxhalls.
> 
> Although both vauxhall and ford have realised that built in obsolescence does not sell cars so they are far better built than 10 years ago.


Japanese cars always score highest on reliability tests, actually.  Honda and Toyota in particular.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 14, 2017)

AUDI = Another Uninformed Driver Insulted?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 14, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> They are overpriced, but that keeps the riff-raff away, so no bad thing...
> 
> We needed a large car, 2 kids one of which was in a buggy (those things take up a shit-load of space) and a gangly lurcher. I wanted it to be a bit sporty, be loaded with gadgets and comfortable on long drives. What would you go for that fits the bill?


 

I didn't realise how much depreciation there is in the A6 estate- they are axually reasonably cheap for a big slab of teutonic dullness- what the MPG  and reliability like on the 3.0? I am be looking for something big and cheap for European trips ....


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> I didn't realise how much depreciation there is in the A6 estate- they are axually reasonably cheap for a big slab of teutonic dullness- what the MPG  and reliability like on the 3.0? I am be looking for something big and cheap for European trips ....



The MPG is excellent as long you you drive sensibly and aren't booting it all over the place. Hardly ever need to go over 2000rpm, I think the last time I looked we get around 34 mpg according to the trip computer thing.

And nothing has gone wrong on our 13 plate one, nor did anything go wrong on our old 55 plate one.

Just don't take it to Audi for servicing, cos they rip the piss. We've just had ours do it's 35K service at a non-Audi place and that was £320 all in.

And I drove the old one from Surrey to Toulon in a day and didn't feel particularly tired at the end of it, so lovely to drive on a nice, empty Euro-motorway.


----------



## ringo (Mar 14, 2017)

dessiato said:


> I was looking at buying one later in the year. Mrs D, though, isn't keen on the idea.


Same here, I like the Audi Q3/4, but it might be a Range Rover Evoque now


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 14, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> dangerous cars- George Michael ( RIP) had mulitple incidents with his RR including losing control and crashing into a snappy snaps and falling out of one at 70 MPH on the motorway as the door had refused to shut properly



I fell out of my series III landrover once I was reversing out of the driveway doing the methadone and school run. The door hadn't shut properly and i lent on it whilst looking over my shoulder and fell out. The truck had full choke on and it kept going, it ran over my leg and then carried on through the neighbor's fence.


----------



## ringo (Mar 14, 2017)

ice-is-forming said:


> I fell out of my series III landrover once I was reversing out of the driveway doing the methadone and school run. The door hadn't shut properly and i lent on it whilst looking over my shoulder and fell out. The truck had full choke on and it kept going, it ran over my leg and then carried on through the neighbor's fence.


How many baked potatoes had you eaten? Did you get the cheese and beans right?


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 14, 2017)

ringo said:


> How many baked potatoes had you eaten? Did you get the cheese and beans right?



 probably not


----------



## ringo (Mar 14, 2017)

ice-is-forming said:


> probably not


Brian Harvey: It happened here


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 14, 2017)

ringo said:


> Brian Harvey: It happened here



A Ha!  My excuse was that i wasn't driving whilst under the influence of drugs at the time. This was a risky business back then


----------



## Hocus Eye. (Mar 14, 2017)

ice-is-forming said:


> I fell out of my series III landrover once I was reversing out of the driveway doing the methadone and school run. The door hadn't shut properly and i lent on it whilst looking over my shoulder and fell out. The truck had full choke on and it kept going, it ran over my leg and then carried on through the neighbor's fence.


The series 111 Landrover is a quite different animal to the subject of this thread.


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 14, 2017)

Hocus Eye. said:


> The series 111 Landrover is a quite different animal to the subject of this thread.



even by page 11?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 14, 2017)

I cannot believe I am potentially considering t a SH audi as a possible purchase for travel . this is indeed the end times. kill me now


----------



## hash tag (Mar 14, 2017)

I wouldn't.

Be warned........I Hate Audi Drivers | Facebook


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

hash tag said:


> I wouldn't.
> 
> Be warned........I Hate Audi Drivers | Facebook




ALL Audi drivers are worse than Nazis and Rwandan genocidal maniacs. Nice.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 14, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> ALL Audi drivers are worse than Nazis and Rwandan genocidal maniacs. Nice.


Good to see a bit of perspective


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 14, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> And the deal-breaker was the clock, looks really out of place and old fashioned. Little thing for sure, just put me right off.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



That's the watch my dad had back in the 70's.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 14, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> That's the watch my dad had back in the 70's.


See, even Frank likes the clock!


----------



## weltweit (Mar 14, 2017)

I have rarely been in Mercedes cars but I did observe that older Mercs were quite nicely appointed, even tasteful, while more modern ones seem a touch gaudy or shouty even.

And that clock is just unacceptable.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> See, even Frank likes the clock!



Ha, Welty actually _does_ like the clock. Gutted for you spy, gutted.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 14, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Ha, Welty actually _does_ like the clock. Gutted for you spy, gutted.


No no. He said it's unacceptable. 

So Welts is on your side, Frank's on mine. That means I win.

And it's a fucking nice clock.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> No no. He said it's unacceptable.
> 
> So Welts is on your side, Frank's on mine. That means I win.
> 
> And it's a fucking nice clock.



*learns how to read.

Bugger.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

Just idle speculation Spymaster, was wondering which marque has performed best at Le Mans in the 21st Century?


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 14, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Just idle speculation Spymaster, was wondering which marque has performed best at Le Mans in the 21st Century?


It's been dominated by Audi. They make some great cars, no denying that. 

Their clocks are shit though.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

And what is Mercedes' record at the same event....oh


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 14, 2017)

Merc have been putting their recent efforts into winning Formula 1 championships and producing outstanding road vehicles. 

With lovely clocks.


----------



## DotCommunist (Mar 14, 2017)

my stepdad had an SLK company car once and it didn't include that grandad timepiece. There were digital displays iirc.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2017)

DotCommunist said:


> my stepdad had an SLK company car once and it dodn't include that grandad timepiece. There were digital displays iirc.



SLK's a decent motor.

Spymaster prefers something with parcel shelf on which to lay a never-worn Panama hat.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 14, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> SLK's a decent motor.
> 
> Spymaster prefers something with parcel shelf on which to lay a never-worn Panama hat.


I wear my (somewhat beaten-up) Panama regularly throughout the summers and it has travelled the world, I'll have you know.


----------



## weltweit (Mar 14, 2017)

The flashier the motor, the more likely it will be keyed, as I know to my past cost, or you are simply restricted to Kensington and Chelsea where your motors not being UberGelandewagens aren't remarkable enough to key.


----------



## weltweit (Mar 14, 2017)




----------



## kabbes (Mar 14, 2017)

Clocks aside, I just can't find it in me to spend more than £20k on a car.  And if I'm spending that, I want to keep it for over ten years minimum.  

The diminishing returns above £20k are breathtaking.  And an extra £5k is an extra £5k, whether it takes you from £0 to £5k or £55k to £60k.  Either way, your extra spend is putting you £5k further away from retirement.  Going 0-60 half a second faster (if you're lucky) or having marginally better leather or something is never going to be worth that to me.

I am a well known stingy miser when it comes to spending on myself, mind.  This is what happens when you dream of nothing but getting out of the corporate world.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 14, 2017)

snadge said:


> There is only one contender for cars that last a long time with over engineered parts, that is German cars





I think not.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 14, 2017)

kabbes said:


> Clocks aside, I just can't find it in me to spend more than £20k on a car.  And if I'm spending that, I want to keep it for over ten years minimum.
> 
> The diminishing returns above £20k are breathtaking.  And an extra £5k is an extra £5k, whether it takes you from £0 to £5k or £55k to £60k.  Either way, your extra spend is putting you £5k further away from retirement.  Going 0-60 half a second faster (if you're lucky) or having marginally better leather or something is never going to be worth that to me.
> 
> I am a well known stingy miser when it comes to spending on myself, mind.  This is what happens when you dream of nothing but getting out of the corporate world.


I wouldn't spend anything close to 20k on a car but my cars are parked on the street and not used for 2 weeks at a time. 10-15k would buy me pretty much any car I'd want and I'd struggle to prize open my wallet for that much. My motto with cars has always been 'if it's not in my price range now, wait til next year when it probably will be'.


----------



## snadge (Mar 14, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> I wouldn't spend anything close to 20k on a car but my cars are parked on the street and not used for 2 weeks at a time. 10-15k would buy me pretty much any car I'd want and I'd struggle to prize open my wallet for that much. My motto with cars has always been 'if it's not in my price range now, wait til next year when it probably will be'.




The most I've spent on a car was 8k on an RS4 B5, I had it for 7 years and sold it for almost double what I paid for it, this new Audi is the 2cnd most I have spent (3k) and I expect to keep it for 5 years plus and still expect to get 1.5-2k when I sell it.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 14, 2017)

Yeah, next time round -- in five years or so -- I can see it being 5k.

Our 4x4 Panda was bought new for 7k, mind.  9 years old now and still going strong, albeit having been thoroughly collied.


----------



## T & P (Mar 14, 2017)

I don't think cars should be viewed as potential investment or their depreciation a major factor. So long as the initial price paid is fair, I'd say buy the car you like rather than one that might bring you a bit more cash years later when you sell it.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 14, 2017)

Our other car is a 1989 micra, bought for £500. This year service and MOT was £160. Last year and year before that MOT only. can't remember year before that!
She owes us nothing and went comfortably up to Derby and back at the weekend.


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 14, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> I cannot believe I am potentially considering t a SH audi as a possible purchase for travel . this is indeed the end times. kill me now



FFS  Don't make any hasty decisions


----------



## ViolentPanda (Mar 15, 2017)

Counted 6 RR Evoques (3 in white, 2 in red, one black, all with tinted windows) on my short walk (400m) to the Post Office this morning. Plus a couple of Cayennes and some Toyota 4x4 crew-cab effort that looked like it had never had any luggage, let alone a  tool chest in the back.


----------



## weltweit (Mar 15, 2017)

ViolentPanda said:


> Counted 6 RR Evoques (3 in white, 2 in red, one black, all with tinted windows) on my short walk (400m) to the Post Office this morning. Plus a couple of Cayennes and some Toyota 4x4 crew-cab effort that looked like it had never had any luggage, let alone a  tool chest in the back.


You obviously visit a post office in a wealthier area than I, round here the only "special" motors I have seen, breaking up the loads of dirty properly used 4x4s, was a white Tesla and I have only seen that once!


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 15, 2017)

I went o the supermarket last night late on. outside the main doors was a narsty black evoque sitting with its DERV engine chattering away , no driver, just a twat  playing with his phone, in the passenger seat. 45 minutes later I came out with shopping - same car, same place, same twat no driver. same engine just chugging away. Evoques really have targeted their consumers well . twat cars for twat people.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 15, 2017)

Discovery Sport. That's a Freelander, yeah?


----------



## kebabking (Mar 15, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Discovery Sport. That's a Freelander, yeah?



yeah, its a Disco for people who can't afford a Disco. 

you'd have to be a fucknugget to buy one, but then that holds true for all of LR/RR products!


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 15, 2017)

I have one of these now. I had 3 landrovers over many years, then I killed 3 pajeros over maybe... only 4 years? This one is a pearl! 







Mines not so swanky but she goes sooooooooo well and she seems to likes me, and shes lasted really well so far.. only $2000 with 7 months rego and a road worthy cert <3 Really cheap to run as well. I did a 500 k round trip for $50. last weekend.


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 15, 2017)

I have a bull bar on mine and extra headlights,  foglights. But only one lol


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 15, 2017)

ice-is-forming said:


> I have a bull bar on mine and extra headlights,  foglights. But only one lol



No roo-bars?


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 16, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> No roo-bars?



Bull bars are the same as roo bars  And yes, I have them


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 16, 2017)

ice-is-forming said:


> Bull bars are the same as roo bars  And yes, I have them



You'll be apples down the Kings Road then


----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 16, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> You'll be apples down the Kings Road then



 You were wondering why there's no roos down the Kings Road right? 

They know the sound of my motor by now....


----------



## iamwithnail (Mar 19, 2017)

snadge said:


> Are you referring to me?





Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It does read that way, but I presume he's referring to the chap in the Mail article.



Haha, exactly that! Hadn't realised how many posts were after and didn't quote, the unrepentant idiot from the article! That would indeed be harsh otherwise.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 19, 2017)

Re: post #188, here she is, tha actual motor. She is now getting primed, but not very well since I first saw her, but hey, a superb motor. Not sure abour the mirrors though
but I would.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 31, 2017)

I was out working today in the mean racetracks around Wandsworth and was following a McLaren; at about 5 miles an hour.....it could not cope with the speed humps that were not on a minor road but a main A road 
BTW , should you need to ask, the answer is yes!


----------



## hash tag (Apr 1, 2017)

Why do Audi's have such an image problem?


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 2, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Why do Audi's have such an image problem?




Looks like a Q3.  Not a proper audi


----------



## SaskiaJayne (Apr 5, 2017)

17reg new model Discos all coming out to play in Essex. It's the block paviours making loads from Essex folks quest to block pave the whole of Essex.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 5, 2017)

SaskiaJayne said:


> 17reg new model Discos all coming out to play in Essex. It's the block paviours making loads from Essex folks quest to block pave the whole of Essex.



The new Discos allow you to adjust your seat positioning from your phone, cos reaching down and doing it with a lever or button on the seat is just too much agg and doesn't sufficiently encourage dangerous driving behaviour.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 6, 2017)

Call out thread against ed's new wheels.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 6, 2017)

just abck from Bulgaria. rented a scrotum car with no issues, the other drivers were unerringly courteous and ordered, which was a surprise. the only fly in the ointment was- yes you have guessed it - black range rover sports, utterly shitting on every one elses manners.


----------



## T & P (Apr 12, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Call out thread against ed's new wheels.
> 
> View attachment 103753


I am guessing there must also be an Urban 76 bulletin board, by invitation only...


----------



## hash tag (Apr 17, 2017)




----------



## kabbes (Apr 17, 2017)

Like the effort, but why not just sell it instead?


----------



## hash tag (Apr 17, 2017)

Name and shame expose


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 8, 2017)

Attached to my gym are various astro-turf pitches used by local sports clubs for kids' football, hockey, tennis and so on. One of these monstrosities was parked up outside my gym tonight, in a disabled spot, with a woman at the wheel and the engine running. I went inside and did some gymming, got changed and came back out just over an hour later and it was still there, engine still running. Gotta be a contender.


----------



## hash tag (May 8, 2017)

Admittedly it was in white, not black and did not have an engine running, but you may wish to take a look at 1 Feb.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 8, 2017)

So it is, camouflaged white on white! 

Not really noticed them before, this thing was just massive and black, like Giant Haystack's hearse or something. I think the engine was running so the mum could watch the TV whilst she waited for her kids to finish. Really shitty behaviour.


----------



## hash tag (May 8, 2017)

But you don't need to run the engine to use in car infotainment, especially modern , big expensive cars.
BTW. I nearly had an impatient a5 up my rear end today trying to intimidate me


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 8, 2017)

Some inbuilt TV's do need the engine running, no idea if this thing's does, but over an hour, ffs.


What did you do to annoy the A5? Surely you of all people now know to pull over as soon as you see the four rings of class looming in to view?


----------



## hash tag (May 8, 2017)

They saw class, my fat arse, another of just 4 letters, also beginning with A, but an Alfa not an Audi.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 8, 2017)

Alfas for show, Audis for a pro. 

On the back of the tabs Moses came down the hill with is that.


----------



## weltweit (May 8, 2017)

Perhaps this fits here.

Nothing worse than young drivers:


----------



## hash tag (May 10, 2017)

Mind you, have you seen the price of a new mini lately Original Mini returns! 60s classic remastered by David Brown with £50k price

The ones at the London Motor Show were £75,000!


----------



## Farmer Giles (May 10, 2017)




----------



## dessiato (May 10, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Mind you, have you seen the price of a new mini lately Original Mini returns! 60s classic remastered by David Brown with £50k price
> 
> The ones at the London Motor Show were £75,000!


Given that almost all the parts are available to build a Mini, why would anyone spend so much for this DB one?


----------



## DownwardDog (May 10, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Given that almost all the parts are available to build a Mini, why would anyone spend so much for this DB one?


 
Because they just want to drive a "new" Mini not spend thousands of hours building one.


----------



## kabbes (May 10, 2017)

Farmer Giles said:


>


----------



## hash tag (May 10, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Given that almost all the parts are available to build a Mini, why would anyone spend so much for this DB one?



"Mini Remastered by David Brown Automotive is a handcrafted masterpiece with all the style, technology and engineering excellence that encompasses our ethos, whilst retaining all the spirit and personality of the original."

"De-seamed, strengthened and sound-proofed throughout"

"A hand-applied paint process that lasts for four weeks, ensures that every car is not only flawlessly finished but protected for a lifetime. Finished with beautiful badges which are handcrafted using traditional die-sinking enamel techniques, every detail has been considered."

Need I go on?


----------



## A380 (May 10, 2017)

hash tag said:


> ..."A hand-applied paint process that lasts for four weeks...



I had a Fiat like that once.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 10, 2017)




----------



## kebabking (May 10, 2017)

Farmer Giles said:


>



Hairdresser or estate agent?


----------



## kabbes (May 10, 2017)

kebabking said:


> Hairdresser or estate agent?


Toddler.


----------



## T & P (May 10, 2017)

Farmer Giles said:


>


If one has to fork out the best part of 100k on a car, you should at least expect it not to be ugly as fuck.


----------



## hash tag (May 11, 2017)

This was attracting crowds at The London Motor Show


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 11, 2017)

hash tag said:


> This was attracting crowds at The London Motor Show



What is it? We can't just it properly without knowing the make.


----------



## hash tag (May 11, 2017)

Tesla


----------



## hash tag (May 11, 2017)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 11, 2017)

Oh, uber-cunt-wagons them. Good call.


----------



## hash tag (May 11, 2017)

Thought you might be wanting one.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 11, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Thought you might be wanting one.



What makes you think I don't?


----------



## T & P (May 11, 2017)

I saw today a Bentley SUV in Chelsea. I didn't even know they had made one. Jesus Christ it's ugly.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 12, 2017)

T & P said:


> I saw today a Bentley SUV in Chelsea. I didn't even know they had made one. Jesus Christ it's ugly.



Two hundred grand's worth of FUCK YOU.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Two hundred grand's worth of FUCK YOU.


Twice so, as the colour of the beast was gold as well


----------



## pogofish (May 12, 2017)

Saw a gold supercar of some kind crawling through heavy traffic on the Ellon road the other day - The combined ages of the driver and passenger probably still had a few years on me!


----------



## DownwardDog (May 12, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Two hundred grand's worth of FUCK YOU.



The new Rolls Royce Cullinan 4x4 is going to be four hundred grands' worth of GET OUT OF MY WAY LITTLE MAN.


----------



## hash tag (May 12, 2017)

A rolls usually comes with a chauffeur, so probably not.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 13, 2017)

hash tag said:


> A rolls usually comes with a chauffeur, so probably not.



If I was spending shit loads of money on a car I'd want to drive it. Could be handy coming back from the pub mind.


----------



## weltweit (May 13, 2017)

When I was in Germany the ads for the latest Mercedes S Classe featured an executive being chauffeured around but at the end said "also for when you want to drive yourself!"


----------



## hash tag (May 17, 2017)

I was behind one of these earlier. It was a narrow two way side street trying to pull out on to a two way main road.
Unusually for a beemer, it seemed like it was taking a long time to pull out; it wasn't indicating of course. As he was too big to
see my car behind him, I gave a quick friendly hoot. A minute or two passed and it had clearly been a while since traffic had driven passed
so a more aggressive hoot; nothing. In the end, I had to get out of my car and tell him I was waiting to pull out and could not get passed him
and did not wish to wait while he finished what he was doing on his phone! ASSHOLE!


----------



## weltweit (May 17, 2017)

And hash tag that BMW in particular is astoundingly ugly, whenever I see one I wonder just what the designers were thinking of when they created it.


----------



## hash tag (May 17, 2017)

Ive got a big arse but that was special?


----------



## T & P (May 17, 2017)

weltweit said:


> And hash tag that BMW in particular is astoundingly ugly, whenever I see one I wonder just what the designers were thinking of when they created it.


You could say the same of most other recent luxury brand SUVs as well. Indeed, the offerings of the more down to earth brands, including some of the cheap and cheerful Asian brands, are far more pleasing on the eye.

In SUVs, luxury car makers have succeed in creating far uglier products at even more disproportionate prices compared to standard brands. Quite an achievement...


----------



## hash tag (May 18, 2017)

It's really good to see Audi have released some stunning new colours for 2017. I saw one of these today


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 19, 2017)

If you've got it, flaunt it


----------



## hash tag (May 19, 2017)

Very much so, but that colour that car


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 19, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Very much so, but that colour that car



Yeah, they really should make it fluorescent.


----------



## hash tag (May 19, 2017)

That colour is the colour of a loud, fuck off car, something that looks and sounds the business. Something a little like this (not a bog average Euro box).


----------



## Poi E (May 19, 2017)

weltweit said:


> And hash tag that BMW in particular is astoundingly ugly, whenever I see one I wonder just what the designers were thinking of when they created it.



Fucking awful. Used to be one down the road with an Overfinch type of cunts' kit on it that made it look quite fascist. Guy got rid of it as it was always being vandalised.  Mind you, it's been a while since BMW made an attractive car. Lovely 850 around the corner that must break the owner's bank to keep running.


----------



## A380 (May 19, 2017)

I quite like their i8 hybrid.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 19, 2017)

A


A380 said:


> I quite like their i8 hybrid.
> 
> View attachment 107128



They are beautiful


----------



## T & P (May 19, 2017)

Yeah. Because it's not a 4x4 shaped vehicle.

4x4 vehicles are inherently ugly by their nature. No two ways about it. Occasionally the odd one comes out that is not too visually disagreeable, but beauty is not one of their strong points.

IMO they have few strong points in the first place unless one is genuinely using them for their original purpose, but each to their own I guess.


----------



## Poi E (May 20, 2017)

The i8s are nice but a bit too much detailing going on. But yeah, compared to the eurobland rest of the range, really good.


----------



## Poi E (May 20, 2017)

T & P said:


> Yeah. Because it's not a 4x4 shaped vehicle.
> 
> 4x4 vehicles are inherently ugly by their nature. No two ways about it. Occasionally the odd one comes out that is not too visually disagreeable, but beauty is not one of their strong points.
> 
> IMO they have few strong points in the first place unless one is genuinely using them for their original purpose, but each to their own I guess.



Agreed. I like her workmanlike honesty of the old Landcruiser 70s


----------



## hash tag (May 20, 2017)

A380 said:


> I quite like their i8 hybrid.
> 
> View attachment 107128



As a concept car it looks better than the real think, but, you can polish a turd.....................


----------



## hash tag (May 20, 2017)

*"Range Rover Sport SVR can forge rivers and sprint like a super car"

Perfect for London and the river Thames.
http://www.mirror.co.uk/lifestyle/motoring/car-reviews/range-rover-sport-svr-can-10399968
"The people at SVO have made the SVR nothing less than the most powerful Land Rover in the company’s history. The car deploys 542bhp from its supercharged 5.0-litre V8 engine and adopts a raft of mechanical and dynamic changes to accompany the extra horsepower."
*
"this is a £96,900 Range Rover Sport (£108,450 as tested) that has 542bhp."

Sorry, no pictures, it will cost you......


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 20, 2017)

T & P said:


> Yeah. Because it's not a 4x4 shaped vehicle.
> 
> 4x4 vehicles are inherently ugly by their nature. No two ways about it. Occasionally the odd one comes out that is not too visually disagreeable, but beauty is not one of their strong points.
> 
> IMO they have few strong points in the first place unless one is genuinely using them for their original purpose, but each to their own I guess.




You are missing the point of them; if you wish to look down on people it helps if you are up higher than them.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 20, 2017)

Poi E said:


> Agreed. I like her workmanlike honesty of the old Landcruiser 70s



They are not "old" you can still buy new ones! I had one for a few years and they are pretty grim. It's more like driving  a piece of earth moving equipment than a car. It needed oil changes every 5,000km and locking diffs were a $3,000 (!)  option.


----------



## T & P (May 20, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> You are missing the point of them; if you wish to look down on people it helps if you are up higher than them.


They should be buying bin lorries then.


----------



## Poi E (May 21, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> They are not "old" you can still buy new ones! I had one for a few years and they are pretty grim. It's more like driving  a piece of earth moving equipment than a car. It needed oil changes every 5,000km and locking diffs were a $3,000 (!)  option.



They updated them so they're no longer quite as agricultural and they look less hairy chested and they don't want to drive you off the road. Yeah, live front axles make for fun progress.


----------



## ViolentPanda (May 21, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> If you've got it, flaunt it



What, jaundice?


----------



## ViolentPanda (May 21, 2017)

Poi E said:


> Agreed. I like her workmanlike honesty of the old Landcruiser 70s



The favourite vehicle of Islamists everywhere!   Just stick a pintle on the truck-bed for mounting your machine gun on, and Abdul's yer unkle!


----------



## A380 (May 21, 2017)

ViolentPanda said:


> The favourite vehicle of Islamists everywhere!   Just stick a pintle on the truck-bed for mounting your machine gun on, and Abdul's yer unkle!


Not just Islamists, anyone who wants a reliable platform for delivering mobile sustained fire. Or you can buy something almost as good for 20 times the price from the Americans.


----------



## kebabking (May 21, 2017)

The Toyota Hilux has been making deep inroads into the discerning vehicle-centric militant fraternity in the last few years.

Perhaps they saw that Top Gear special where the team drove to the North Pole?

It's tends to be the better funded discerning vehicle-centric militant of course...


----------



## ViolentPanda (May 21, 2017)

kebabking said:


> The Toyota Hilux has been making deep inroads into the discerning vehicle-centric militant fraternity in the last few years.
> 
> Perhaps they saw that Top Gear special where the team drove to the North Pole?
> 
> It's tends to be the better funded discerning vehicle-centric militant of course...



The last HiLux I saw was a brand new "Crew Cab" version with those stupid spotlights on a bar on the roof.  Great for the Prairies, the desert, the Steppes or the Outback, but on Streatham High Road it looked fucking stupid - almost as stupid as the neck-bearded cunt driving it.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 22, 2017)

A380 said:


> Not just Islamists, anyone who wants a reliable platform for delivering mobile sustained fire. Or you can buy something almost as good for 20 times the price from the Americans.



A Ford F-150 is far superior to a Land Cruiser 70 in just about every way as long as you don't get the Powerstroke diesel which consumes almost as much coolant as it does fuel. I don't know about the Chevy and I assume the ball joints come flying out of the Dodge Ram every time you go round a corner.


----------



## pogofish (May 22, 2017)

How does a tweeded-up/gentry-like family with dogs in sparkling clean double cab Ford Ranger, towing a tractor score on this scale?


----------



## kebabking (May 22, 2017)

pogofish said:


> How does a tweeded-up/gentry-like family with dogs in sparkling clean double cab Ford Ranger, towing a tractor score on this scale?



Depends on how muddy the tractor was.

Were you off to a show pogofish ?


----------



## pogofish (May 22, 2017)

kebabking said:


> Depends on how muddy the tractor was.
> 
> Were you off to a show pogofish ?



Spectacularly un-muddy! 

I somehow got the impression that the nearest this lot got to the soil was the stuff they shake over tatties at the supermarket. 

Most of the real local country gentry look and walk like they have just clambered out of a field - even when being somewhat smart.

Yup - first of the year!  Pig racing was an interesting new sporting import.


----------



## kebabking (May 22, 2017)

pogofish said:


> ...first of the year!  Pig racing was an interesting new sporting import.



Dunno where you are (that London?), but the Hanbury Show, Worcestershire 1st July, is a brilliant day out, as the Moreton-in-the-Marsh show (Gloucestershire, first weekend of September..).

We don't bother with the three counties at Malvern any more, it's just stupid money...


----------



## pogofish (May 22, 2017)

kebabking said:


> Dunno where you are (that London?),



Nope - This show was on the Aberdeenshire/Moray border.  Proper teuchterland!  

This is a fairly new show, the old one lapsed many years ago but it restarted in 2011/2012 and TBH, its gone from strength to strength.  They kept some of the stuff that makes it just like any other of course but broadened it out in a way that makes it a much better weekend overall.


----------



## hash tag (May 22, 2017)

It's not just 4x4 range rover type things that are so unnecessary in town, the supercars also. 
I guess the supercar season must be picking up as I saw  4 or 5 ferrari's, lamborgini's or whatever on Saturday in Park Lane.
Also saw a Gallardo today; outside Tooting job centre


----------



## DownwardDog (May 23, 2017)

hash tag said:


> It's not just 4x4 range rover type things that are so unnecessary in town, the supercars also.
> I guess the supercar season must be picking up as I saw  4 or 5 ferrari's, lamborgini's or whatever on Saturday in Park Lane.
> Also saw a Gallardo today; outside Tooting job centre



You can tick both boxes with a Lamborghini Urus.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 23, 2017)

Anus

that is vile


----------



## Dogsauce (May 23, 2017)

I reckon there's some ongoing humorous challenge between car company designers as to who can get away with making the most vulgar looking piece of shit to sell to petrodollar princes and footballers. I bet they all go to the same pub and laugh about it amongst themselves.


----------



## Tom A (May 23, 2017)

hash tag said:


> *"Range Rover Sport SVR can forge rivers and sprint like a super car"
> 
> Perfect for London and the river Thames.*



That's cool, but can it get in the sea?


----------



## weltweit (May 23, 2017)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 106871
> I was behind one of these earlier. It was a narrow two way side street trying to pull out on to a two way main road.
> Unusually for a beemer, it seemed like it was taking a long time to pull out; it wasn't indicating of course. As he was too big to
> see my car behind him, I gave a quick friendly hoot. A minute or two passed and it had clearly been a while since traffic had driven passed
> ...


The thing about this ugly BMW is that it is exactly what a teenage lover of hot cars would do to a normal car. Ultra wide wheels, jacked up and massive wheel arches. It just looks like a toy because of it.

Mind you it has to be said, go faster boys (and I think they are mainly boys) exist even in normally tasteful Germany. I have seen plenty of stylish Mercedes made to look odd with massive rear wings and the like.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 23, 2017)

weltweit said:


> normally tasteful Germany.



U wot?


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> U wot?



Business up front, party behind... Mr fucking tasty!


----------



## hash tag (May 23, 2017)

weltweit said:


> The thing about this ugly BMW is that it is exactly what a teenage lover of hot cars would do to a normal car. Ultra wide wheels, jacked up and massive wheel arches. It just looks like a toy because of it.
> 
> Mind you it has to be said, go faster boys (and I think they are mainly boys) exist even in normally tasteful Germany. I have seen plenty of stylish Mercedes made to look odd with massive rear wings and the like.



But like this?


----------



## kabbes (May 24, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> You can tick both boxes with a Lamborghini Urus.


Wha... why?


----------



## dessiato (May 24, 2017)

kabbes said:


> Wha... why?


Why not? I'd buy it, if I were in the market for that type of vehicle.

I'd change the wheels. I don't like those very much.

Eta imagine it in a semi-matte black, black windows, very aggressive. Now, where's my lottery tickets?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 24, 2017)

kabbes said:


> Wha... why?





dessiato said:


> imagine it in a semi-matte black, black windows, very aggressive.



Would look pretty good cruising downtown LA.

Not so sure about Dorking though.


----------



## ringo (May 24, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> You can tick both boxes with a Lamborghini Urus.



Like that. Looks like something from the Cursed Earth from my 2000AD reading childhood. Agreed though, probably not so good in suburbia.


----------



## dylanredefined (May 24, 2017)

ringo said:


> Like that. Looks like something from the Cursed Earth from my 2000AD reading childhood. Agreed though, probably not so good in suburbia.



Needs more laser cannons  If you are going to build a rugged 4*4  why make it look like a normal car? That thing probably costs an insane amount of money and looks like the new discovery which looks quite bland to my eyes.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 24, 2017)

kabbes said:


> Wha... why?



Because premium brand 4x4s are very profitable. It also celebrates Lambo's 4x4 heritage.


----------



## ringo (May 24, 2017)

Reminds me of a Tonka toy I had too.
I had one of these, but sure I had another similar one I can't find a pic of too:


----------



## dylanredefined (May 24, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Because premium brand 4x4s are very profitable. It also celebrates Lambo's 4x4 heritage.


 The army brought something based on this turned out expensive and a bit crap looks cool though.


ringo said:


> Reminds me of a Tonka toy I had too.
> I had one of these, but sure I had another similar one I can't find a pic of too:
> View attachment 107536



 If I was going to spend vast sums on an impractical 4*4 I'd at least want people to look at it that Urus looks too bland to stand out too compromised to be any good off road.Why buy


----------



## ringo (May 24, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> If I was going to spend vast sums on an impractical 4*4 I'd at least want people to look at it that Urus looks too bland to stand out too compromised to be any good off road.Why buy


Bland seems to be the way forward for these mega priced boxes. Two of the rich students at the Uni I work at drive these from Mercedes/AMG and Hummer:


----------



## dylanredefined (May 24, 2017)

ringo said:


> Bland seems to be the way forward for these mega priced boxes. Two of the rich students at the Uni I work at drive these from Mercedes/AMG and Hummer:
> View attachment 107549 View attachment 107550



Cars 10 year olds would choose. The spooks I lived next door to in Basrah Palace started off with a Mercedes Amg it was black with blacked out windows
just like the bad guys would drive. Looked cool, so cool everyone knew spooks drove it was exchanged for some ratty Nissan van.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 24, 2017)

If I had around £200k to spend I'd go for the G63.






Mental age is around 10 though, tbf.


----------



## dessiato (May 24, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Would look pretty good cruising downtown LA.
> 
> Not so sure about Dorking though.


Fortunately I no longer live in Dorking.


----------



## T & P (May 24, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Why not? I'd buy it, if I were in the market for that type of vehicle.
> 
> I'd change the wheels. I don't like those very much.
> 
> Eta imagine it in a semi-matte black, black windows, very aggressive. Now, where's my lottery tickets?


If you're lucky enough to win the lottery and want to splash out on a supercar, at least spend it on something that is beautifully designed and engineered. Like a Ferrari, or an Aston Martin DB9- or even better, a DB5. Not an oversized square box of a car created to appeal to simple-minded footballers and people with far more money than common sense or taste.


----------



## dessiato (May 24, 2017)

T & P said:


> If you're lucky enough to win the lottery and want to splash out on a supercar, at least spend it on something that is beautifully designed and engineered. Like a Ferrari, or an Aston Martin DB9- or even better, a DB5. Not an oversized square box of a car created to appeal to simple-minded footballers and people with far more money than common sense or taste.


But when I win the lottery I will have a DB9 as a matter of course. I also will have more money than sense.


----------



## pogofish (May 24, 2017)

I got a lift in a Merc SLC yesterday - top down, acceleration demonstrated at every opportunity.  Yes, one of my bosses is having a major mid-life crisis. 

I think this might be described as an "I don't care if I'm a cunt" wagon!


----------



## kebabking (May 24, 2017)

dessiato said:


> ... I also will have more money than sense.



There's a joke there involving the State Pension and a man who finds himself in A&E once a fortnight, but I can't quite put my finger on it....


----------



## A380 (May 24, 2017)

dylanredefined said:


> If I was going to spend vast sums on an impractical 4*4 I'd at least want people to look at it that Urus looks too bland to stand out too compromised to be any good off road.Why buy




Even when I'm broke I have more money than sense...


----------



## hash tag (May 30, 2017)

Saw something very similar to this at the weekend. Whats not to like


----------



## kabbes (May 30, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Saw something very similar to this at the weekend. Whats not to like
> 
> View attachment 107944


That's just begging for an egging.


----------



## dessiato (May 30, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Saw something very similar to this at the weekend. Whats not to like
> 
> View attachment 107944


What's not to like? Almost everything about it except it's a Bentley, and then only because of the heritage.


----------



## kabbes (May 30, 2017)

dessiato said:


> What's not to like? Almost everything about it except it's a Bentley, and then only because of the heritage.


Nothing should be that shiny.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 30, 2017)

When I worked in Berkeley Square, the streets were full of these and their ilk on a summers evening. fucking awful.


----------



## hash tag (May 30, 2017)

If going to have a gold car, may as well do it properly.


----------



## T & P (May 30, 2017)

I wonder how much money Cash 4 Gold would offer for that car.


----------



## hash tag (May 30, 2017)

You have the registration number; go for it!


----------



## hash tag (May 31, 2017)

Rolls-Royce debuts its stunning £10 million Sweptail - the most expensive new car ever sold


----------



## OzT (May 31, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Would look pretty good cruising downtown LA.
> 
> Not so sure about Dorking though.


 
and what is wrong with antique shops mega centre of Dorking I pray?


----------



## T & P (May 31, 2017)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 108038
> 
> 
> Rolls-Royce debuts its stunning £10 million Sweptail - the most expensive new car ever sold



I'd expect a robotic arm to pop out and wank me off for that kind of money...


----------



## Dogsauce (May 31, 2017)

T & P said:


> I'd expect a robotic arm to pop out and wank me off for that kind of money...



It'd be on the same stalk as the wipers,  so be careful, unless you get the optional 'hands free' kit.


----------



## hash tag (May 31, 2017)

I don't know if you noticed, but it only got 2 doors! A true drivers car


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 31, 2017)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 108038
> 
> 
> Rolls-Royce debuts its stunning £10 million Sweptail - the most expensive new car ever sold



That's really ugly!


----------



## hash tag (Jun 22, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Given that almost all the parts are available to build a Mini, why would anyone spend so much for this DB one?





DownwardDog said:


> Because they just want to drive a "new" Mini not spend thousands of hours building one.



Now £100,000 for one  It takes 1400 man hours to build, what with cleaning up an original body....Mini Remastered 2017 review


----------



## mauvais (Jun 22, 2017)

Ah that's ridiculous. When did they last make the Mini, 2000?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jun 22, 2017)

the doormen community from back up home have moved wholescale into black RR sports now. No more Subaru cock extensions. A fleet of seemingly hundreds of cars that go absolutely nowhere apart from a 5 miles round trip on 6 nights a week. is there a less / more representaive example of the vacuosness of modern british  life than a 12 year old black RR sport ?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jun 23, 2017)

Heh, when I started going places that had doormen it was the Lotus Carlton that was the pinnacle doorman motor.


----------



## Poi E (Jun 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Heh, when I started going places that had doormen it was the Lotus Carlton that was the pinnacle doorman motor.



 Proper motor that.


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

Is a land rover defender also an arsehole thing to have ? Is it just the sport that's an arsehole - or is it people who live in cities having one of these that are the arseholes? Plz help don't want to be more of an arsehole than necessary if i can help it but do want to go and live up a quite scary muddy track that is kind of 4x4s only. 
I like the ones that have a sort of snout on them like an elephants trunk. I'm an arsehole aren't I.


----------



## hippogriff (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> Is a land rover defender also an arsehole thing to have ? Is it just the sport that's an arsehole - or is it people who live in cities having one of these that are the arseholes? Plz help don't want to be more of an arsehole than necessary if i can help it but do want to go and live up a quite scary muddy track that is kind of 4x4s only.
> I like the ones that have a sort of snout on them like an elephants trunk. I'm an arsehole aren't I.



Nope, snorkel lets you go through deeper water


----------



## kebabking (Jul 4, 2017)

Nothing wrong in having a 4x4 utility wagon if that's what you need - the cuntishness of the RR sport etc... comes from taking up more space than you need, throwing out more crap than you have too, and driving live a cunt who thinks that owning one means other, lesser beings should just get out of your way.

And the fact that most people who drive them simply can't manage their size and power. If you have a toddler an AK-47 you'd get the same results...


----------



## OzT (Jul 4, 2017)

Way to go is to get a 50/60's standard green land rover swb soft top and then stick the elephant's intake snout on it yourself bimble, then you can be an ultra stylish one, and practical as well, plus being rock 'ard, specially in winter!


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

The toddler AK47 analogy gives me pause for thought. Maybe i need to look at those sensible ugly 4x4 things instead, the ones that look like normal cars.
But yeah - the soft top ones are real beauties.
this is on ebay:
 
I do see why driving this might turn anyone into an arsehole because you'd feel invincible.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 4, 2017)

OzT said:


> Way to go is to get a 50/60's standard green land rover swb soft top and then stick the elephant's intake snout on it yourself bimble, then you can be an ultra stylish one, and practical as well, plus being rock 'ard, specially in winter!



LR Series 1 are now at a truly stupid price level when you consider what terrible vehicles they are.

Land Rover Series 1 86" 2.0 petrol RESTORED For Sale (1956) on Car And Classic UK [C886311]


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

^ i wish you hadn't done that, was happily unaware of that whole new level of car-swoon.


----------



## OzT (Jul 4, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> LR Series 1 are now at a truly stupid price level when you consider what terrible vehicles they are.
> 
> Land Rover Series 1 86" 2.0 petrol RESTORED For Sale (1956) on Car And Classic UK [C886311]


 
Unf'kininbelivable. You're right, silly prices, even if it had been restored, and that's not that hard to do to these vehicles.

I have a coupl eof classic bikes and I too see silly prices on the net for them, knowing how much I paid for them originaly when they were undesirable, compared to the new waves of Jap 4's hitting the market then, and seeing the prices. Not just classic bikes, the cars I learnt to drive in and use to buy, running and legal, for less than a week's money ar enow in their thousands.

Mut I still think bimble should try for a non restored swb sorftop


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

OzT what does swb stand for?


----------



## OzT (Jul 4, 2017)

Short Wheel Base

ETA: as opposed to LWB long wheel Base. Swb I think looks much nicer and more pratical unless you really do need to get a heifer or herd of sheep in the back


----------



## ViolentPanda (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> The toddler AK47 analogy gives me pause for thought. Maybe i need to look at those sensible ugly 4x4 things instead, the ones that look like normal cars.
> But yeah - the soft top ones are real beauties.
> this is on ebay:
> View attachment 110727
> I do see why driving this might turn anyone into an arsehole because you'd feel invincible.



Driving an old Landie won't make you feel invincible, it'll make you feel arthritic in every joint, and like your arsecheeks have been kicked by a horse.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 4, 2017)

OzT said:


> Mut I still think bimble should try for a non restored swb sorftop



I doubt there are any genuinely unrestored S1s left as, left to their own devices, they will have rusted to dust decades ago.


----------



## OzT (Jul 4, 2017)

Only on the chassis, and the body's easy to lift away leaving you two nice channels to weld, then put body on, which won't rust. The ole Leyland engines are two a penny to pick up, only expensive stuff I think are the serious ironwear of the 4wd systems, the gears and pinnions.

Then again, we're going off into a project then rather than a buy and drive. think i always had a soft spot for them and woudl liekd to have one as a project, but have been spending my time and money on bikes instead, hence I do dribble a bit when talking about them


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

blimey. looks like this thing sold for 15k


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 4, 2017)

don't, just don't.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble

This is a great LR S1 review.


----------



## OzT (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> blimey. looks like this thing sold for 15k
> View attachment 110729


 
Wow!!!! Tell them they're dreaming!!!


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

^ Thank you DownwardDog . I had no idea that i could appreciate car porn.


----------



## OzT (Jul 4, 2017)

But bimble, have we converted you to a swb LR I yet?


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

Yes.


----------



## kebabking (Jul 4, 2017)

what ViolentPanda said - not only are they badly made crap, but landies are _astonishingly_ uncomfortable to drive for more than about 15 minutes, and given how slow they are, you ain't getting anywhere in 15 minutes. to drive even a newish Defender from Gloucester to Dumfries is to know pain like no other human being in history.

if you want a rugged, utility, not cunty, fix it yourself, reliable, comfortable 4X4 go for something like a Mitsubushi Shogun/Pajero or Isuzu Trooper/Vauxhall Monteray. you'll get a decent, driveaway vehicle for £1500.

if you're_ really_ desperate for that LR experience, just send me the £20,000 and i'll cripple you and leave you by the roadside - that would, at least, get it over with. unlike owning a LR...


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

They can't really be badly made crap if still reliably doing their job 60 odd years on can they? 
But I hear you kebabking , you're the voice of reason, come to save me from a humungous mistake based only on aesthetics. 
Might as well admit that i'm talking about buying my first ever car, so yeah, a giant overpriced antique is probably not the obvious choice.


----------



## kebabking (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> They can't really be badly made crap if still reliably doing their job 60 odd years on can they?..



you know how Hunter wellies were really good about 12/15 years ago - and then wellies went fashionable, the 'slebs started wearing them and Hunter discovered that there are enough idiots in the world that you can, in fact, sell a really shit, badly made with crap materials wellie for the same price as a really well made, with excellent materials wellie as long as its got the right badge on?

i give you LR...


----------



## Spymaster (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> ... you're the voice of reason, come to save me from a humungous mistake based only on aesthetics.


You were going to buy a Land Rover based on _aesthetics _???


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> They can't really be badly made crap if still reliably doing their job 60 odd years on can they?



Of course they can. Any S1 LR still on the road now will have had thousands of man-hours and tens of thousands of pounds poured into it. It will require much more of the same to keep it capable of moving under its own power.


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> You were going to buy a Land Rover based on _aesthetics _???


----------



## A380 (Jul 4, 2017)




----------



## kebabking (Jul 4, 2017)

yeah, you know how landrover owners say that they are 'easy to fix' - well, thats the result of _constant practice_...


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> You were going to buy a Land Rover based on _aesthetics _???


You can't seriously be immune to the charms of a thing like this - look at it all feminine and minty-fresh.


----------



## A380 (Jul 4, 2017)

It's the design elegance that makes a car as big as a LWB Land Rover and still gives you no space for your right elbow when driving. That takes proper skill.


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

But on the old ones you can remove the top of the drivers door, just lift it off: Space for elbow voila. Genius.


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## kebabking (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> But on the old ones you can remove the top of the drivers door, just lift it off: Space for elbow voila. Genius.



yeah, but the filth take a very dim view of people driving up the M5 with kids and dogs hanging out of a stripped down Landy with no doors.

bloody fun police...


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## Saul Goodman (Jul 4, 2017)

I used to buy, repair and sell Land Rovers in my youth, so I've owned quite a few.
This air-transportable/lightweight was the cleanest I ever had.







It was an ex military one, and the chassis had been completely coated in bitumen. It was like brand new underneath. Looking at the silly money they go for now, I should have kept it.

SWB Land Rovers are a complete waste of space. You'd hold more in the boot of a decent car. 

Actually, all of those Land Rovers are a complete waste of space.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 4, 2017)

I have done LR and they are the worst shit you can imagine. make no mistake, you will spend more time trying to make it go than actually going anywhere. You are going to get very familiar with  digging around in the rusty corners of your log passed grandads toolbox trying to find the right size of imperial spanner to fit a rounded nut that seems to be formed of a lead/mercury mix. I am open about my love for crap cars and exaggerate their shitness but nothing comes close to how bad LRs really are. Not funny.


----------



## bimble (Jul 4, 2017)

It looks so wrong parked there in the domestic setting of a normal residential street. Wrong like having a pet bear is wrong. I think they're too big for me anyway, they're massive aren't they.  
Ok thanks wise people. (Not you OzT )


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jul 4, 2017)

bimble said:


> It looks so wrong parked there in the domestic setting of a normal residential street. Wrong like having a pet bear is wrong. I think they're too big for me anyway, they're massive aren't they.
> Ok thanks wise people. (Not you OzT )


They're not massive. They're just shit. The inner rear wheel arches occupy more floor space than is available for carrying stuff. A 5 gallon drum of diesel is about all you can fit in.
I'm starting to remember how much I hate them


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## OzT (Jul 5, 2017)

bimble said:


> It looks so wrong parked there in the domestic setting of a normal residential street. Wrong like having a pet bear is wrong. I think they're too big for me anyway, they're massive aren't they.
> Ok thanks wise people. (Not you OzT )


 
right I am now properly wounded bimble! Grrr....  (takes bimble OFF my Xmas cards list)



Well I really like them, and think they're easy to work on, and one done properly, just the usual maintenance. SWB great for nipping round places even if not practical for space, LWB for serious motoring.


----------



## likesfish (Jul 6, 2017)

Land Rover Defender | Kahn Design Packages | Alloy Wheels | Car Parts | The world's leading automotive fashion house





  I must apologise to overfinch I thought they were responsible for this horror its a Kahndesign you can have it in grey and hi vis orange if you hate everybody. If I win the lottery dylanredisigned will be annoying the denizens of portsmouth with one


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## kebabking (Jul 6, 2017)

likesfish said:


> Land Rover Defender | Kahn Design Packages | Alloy Wheels | Car Parts | The world's leading automotive fashion house
> 
> 
> 
> ...



If I win the lottery I'll buy one and donate it to the RAF to use their largest bomb on it...


----------



## phillm (Jul 6, 2017)

Where would Blue Peter safaris had been without one ?


----------



## hash tag (Jul 12, 2017)

"Careful though, a lot of these cars were modified by footballers with poor taste, and people who wanted to look like they were footballers with poor taste..." 

Range Rover Sport


----------



## Poi E (Jul 12, 2017)

bimble said:


> View attachment 110727
> I do see why driving this might turn anyone into an arsehole because you'd feel invincible.



Nope, you feel quite vulnerable, wondering if the fucker will get you to where you are going.


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Jul 13, 2017)

The other half's dad has got a lwb defender from the 90s. It's got nearly 300,000 miles on the clock to be fair, but it's always getting fixed.

The thing is rusting away and is a heap, I hate it.

I'd second what others have said, it's tiny inside, sitting in the back is like a contortionists act and the front isn't much better. It doesn't have much room in the boot either, for the size of the thing.

Plus, you can feel every bump, its like riding in a shopping trolley over a mountain track, and that's just nipping to the shops.

He's had them all his life and lives out in the sticks in Scotland so fair play to him, but they are horrible transport. I dread getting in the thing, its like a backwards tardis. Imagine getting in and old mini and you've got the inside of a land rover.


----------



## weltweit (Jul 13, 2017)

Rosemary Jest said:


> ... they are horrible transport. I dread getting in the thing, its like a backwards tardis. Imagine getting in and old mini and you've got the inside of a land rover.


It is why Land Rover lost all its former markets like Australia etc because along came Toyota with their Land Cruiser which had coil suspension and decent interiors and Land Rover just continued doing what it had always done. That is my understanding at least.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 13, 2017)

weltweit said:


> It is why Land Rover lost all its former markets like Australia etc because along came Toyota with their Land Cruiser which had coil suspension and decent interiors and Land Rover just continued doing what it had always done. That is my understanding at least.



And breaking down in the outback in a gazillion degrees heat probably loses its appeal after a while.


----------



## kebabking (Jul 13, 2017)

weltweit said:


> It is why Land Rover lost all its former markets like Australia etc because along came Toyota with their Land Cruiser which had coil suspension and decent interiors and Land Rover just continued doing what it had always done. That is my understanding at least.



LR's crapness was behind one of the potentially greatest disasters the British Army has faced since 1945 - in 2003 a certain unit was chased through Northern and western Iraq for _days_ by local militia groups who could go faster and carry heavier weapons than them in Japanese 4x4's.

_They_ were crawling along at 15mph having their bones rattled and lumps falling off their wagons while the Fedayeen were happily cruising along at 30mph over the same terrain in Toyota pickups.

In the end the whole thing was a washout - the Sqn split up and all the wagons were either destroyed by enemy fire, broken by the terrain or blown up when the Sqn was eventually evacuated by helicopter.

They are utter shit.


----------



## OzT (Jul 14, 2017)

It's true LR has lost the market back home cause the Japanese 4x4 were just so much better and reliable.

A little note here, not a lot of people know this. Rolls Royces were big sellers back home (relatively speaking) in the early 1900s for station owners in the bush, not because they were trying to be posh, but they were the most reliable cars back then.


----------



## Poi E (Jul 14, 2017)

Had a go in an old Suzuki Vitara in some dunes in S Africa (sorry fragile ecosystem. Won't happen again.) Such a light thing and was loads better than an in-laws Landcruiser getting up and down the terrain. Lighter 4WD FTW.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 14, 2017)

The Vitara was the worst motor I have ever driven. It was an early soft top one. It was cold, noisey, draughty, underpowered and very poorly built. At a push, on a long downhill will a hurricane force tail wind, it might get up to 80. Thankfully it belonged to an ex who bought it from new!


----------



## kebabking (Jul 14, 2017)

The little 4x4's - the vitara's, the Jimmy's etc.. are widely used by the Green Laning groups.

If you just need to go places then they are a very good option, if you need to drag loads of crap places then you need a bigger one - the Isuzu trooper will tow 3.2 tons...


----------



## Poi E (Jul 15, 2017)

So somewhere is the perfect balance for cruising the desert with an anti-aircraft gun on the back. Perhaps it really is the Landcruiser.

Landcruiser versus Ford. When there's no cock fight to bet on...


----------



## hash tag (Jul 18, 2017)

I guess it had to happen 2018 Rolls-Royce Cullinan SUV: Spy shots of new Rolls SUV


----------



## hash tag (Jul 18, 2017)

Hell is freezing over Ferrari to launch first crossover in 2021


----------



## Spymaster (Jul 18, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Hell is freezing over Ferrari to launch first crossover in 2021
> 
> View attachment 111548


That's a squashed Cayenne. Thought they'd have done better.


----------



## Poi E (Jul 24, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Hell is freezing over Ferrari to launch first crossover in 2021
> 
> View attachment 111548



Fuck. It looks like a reject from a Nissan studio.

Meh, Porsche gone SUV, now Ferrari, Bentley. At least Ferrari are offering a hybrid and slowly getting into the 21st century.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 24, 2017)

It gets worse - I see Porsche have now done an estate.

In the incredibly, this takes some beating. I saw one last week, goodness it is big and truly hideous. Heaven knows what Mercedes are doing, they now have so many models


----------



## weltweit (Jul 24, 2017)

hash tag said:


> .. Heaven knows what Mercedes are doing, they now have so many models


And for my money Mercedes has some quite ugly cars out at the moment. I don't know what their styling department is playing at but I don't rate their output.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 25, 2017)

Mercedes have far too many models on the road right now. The A class is typical identikit eurobox, the new c class looks like an old ford puma; it just goes on. Tis a shame to see this happen as they were known for making some of the prettiest and some of the most iconic cars ever seen.


----------



## hot air baboon (Jul 25, 2017)

Gerry McGovern, design director at West Midlands-based manufacturer Land Rover, hit out at the singer-turned-fashion designer for a speech she made at the launch of a special edition of the car called the VB Evoque.

Posh Spice was reported to have told the audience: "I've designed a car that I want to drive, a car I think (husband) David wants to drive."

But speaking at an event last week, Mr McGovern said: "She didn't design the car... I've forgotten more than that woman will ever know about (car) designing - to be a car designer takes years.	

The source of his ire dates back to 2012 when Mrs Beckham was asked create a special version of the Evoque with "restrained colour and detail changes" but not to "change the award-winning design".

The £80,000 car featured matt paintwork, vintage-inspired leather seats, 'rose gold accents' inspired by Mrs Beckham's watch, mohair trimmings and a leather luggage set.

Why Victoria Beckham has angered a Range Rover designer

not sure this is really worth getting upset about


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 25, 2017)

I for one am glad Mrs Beckham has angered that jumped up ponce.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 4, 2017)

A nice little Merc snapped on the wild streets of London. Ideal for people who can't park/find the kerb or can't be bothered with speed humps


----------



## hash tag (Aug 15, 2017)

Flaming nora


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Aug 15, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Hell is freezing over Ferrari to launch first crossover in 2021
> 
> View attachment 111548


It's powered by Enzo spinning in his grave.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 22, 2017)

This just seemed an apt place to put this, it's difficult not to have a quiet snigger.


----------



## OzT (Aug 22, 2017)

hash tag said:


> This just seemed an apt place to put this, it's difficult not to have a quiet snigger.
> 
> 
> 
> View attachment 114043


 
Lambos can only be oarange. Or yellow i guess.
some people have more money than taste


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 22, 2017)

That's just a wrap rather than a paint-job. Still, the wrap would cost a few thousand.

What's it being towed for?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Aug 22, 2017)

its the Met police's counter Vulgar Wanker squad in action


----------



## Spymaster (Aug 22, 2017)

hash tag said:


> It gets worse - I see Porsche have now done an estate.
> 
> In the incredibly, this takes some beating. I saw one last week, goodness it is big and truly hideous.


The Panamera estate (ST). I think it looks gorgeous.







This was always going to happen after the success of the original Panamera (scoffed at by many initially, but has turned out to be one of the best new motors for 20 years) and at around £80k for the hybrid they're going to sell bucketloads of them. Might even be tempted to buy a 5 or 6 year old myself in a few years.


----------



## OzT (Aug 22, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> its the Met police's counter Vulgar Wanker squad in action


----------



## Teaboy (Aug 22, 2017)

Old men and their estate cars.  Look its got a badge and a big engine, I'm still cool - I've still got it.

Tow-bar and membership to the caravan club as standard?


----------



## DotCommunist (Aug 22, 2017)

Teaboy said:


> Old men and their estate cars.  Look its got a badge and a big engine, I'm still cool - I've still got it.
> 
> Tow-bar and membership to the caravan club as standard?


Leather gloves, big plate to use at the hotel breakfast buffet


----------



## hash tag (Aug 22, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> That's just a wrap rather than a paint-job. Still, the wrap would cost a few thousand.
> 
> What's it being towed for?



The loader is an AA lorry, the lambo is broken down


----------



## Spymaster (Aug 22, 2017)

Teaboy said:


> Old men and their estate cars.  Look its got a badge and a big engine, I'm still cool - I've still got it.
> 
> Tow-bar and membership to the caravan club as standard?



.... AND room for the dogs in the back. 

I just want a car with more exhaust pipes than Bahnhof's.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 22, 2017)

hash tag said:


> The loader is an AA lorry, the lambo is broken down



Ah well, Italian motor, standard. 



How's yer Alfa?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 22, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> .... AND room for the dogs in the back.
> 
> I just want a car with more exhaust pipes than Bahnhof's.



You might need to up your game, we're seriously considering the SQ7 now, 4 pipes. And tbh, it's this thread that has prompted the serious consideration, "How can I be THE apex arsehole? SQ7".


----------



## OzT (Aug 22, 2017)

One fast start too many clutch just a veneer of dust . . . .   (the Lambo)


----------



## hash tag (Aug 22, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Ah well, Italian motor, standard.
> 
> 
> 
> How's yer Alfa?



As beautiful as ever


----------



## A380 (Aug 26, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> its the Met police's counter Vulgar Wanker squad in action


Second busiest in the country after the Essex Police one...


----------



## dessiato (Aug 26, 2017)

Went for a drive in a Macan. Nice car. Liked it. My mate's also bought a Mitsubishi EV 4x4 thing. They sit on his drive alongside the girlfriend's K reg MR2. It is only one owner from new, and has less than 32000 on the clock.

I know which I'd have.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Aug 26, 2017)

DotCommunist said:


> Leather gloves, big plate to use at the hotel breakfast buffet



String-backed leather gloves.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Aug 26, 2017)

Spymaster said:


> .... AND room for the dogging in the back.



CTFY


----------



## pogofish (Aug 28, 2017)

Spotted this thing up-close the other day - Heading out the road to darkest Buchan but this photo was taken outside the cheap gym at Kittybrewster.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 28, 2017)

That's got class written all over it.


----------



## pogofish (Aug 28, 2017)

It was headed for the land that class forgot!


----------



## Poi E (Aug 30, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> .
> 
> What's it being towed for?



Major violation of good taste.


----------



## Poi E (Aug 30, 2017)

pogofish said:


> It was headed for the land that class forgot!



Everyone gets one in the workers' paradise!


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 30, 2017)

hash tag said:


> That's got class A bell end written all over it.



FFY


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Aug 30, 2017)

Did a long journey as a passenger in a Range Rover Sport today.

I now totally get them and want one


----------



## DownwardDog (Aug 31, 2017)

Aston Martin join the SUV fray with the DBX and it's hideous. It looks Korean.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 31, 2017)

How's that an SUV? The point of an SUV is that a middle-aged man can get out of it without the use of some kind of lifting device.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Aug 31, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> How's that an SUV? The point of an SUV is that a middle-aged man can get out of it without the use of some kind of lifting device.


 
that is a disservice to the the Korean designers to be fair. Though AM could stick their badge on a sierra, glue some carbon panels on onto the dashboard and still be able to charge £100k for it


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 31, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Did a long journey as a passenger in a Range Rover Sport today.
> 
> I now totally get them and want one



It's all about the high driving position. Which makes you feel important at the expense of trivialities like being able to see pedestrians and cyclists before you hit them and burning a sensible amount of fuel.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 31, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Aston Martin join the SUV fray with the DBX and it's hideous. It looks Korean.



It looks like the middle bit is missing.


----------



## kebabking (Aug 31, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> It's all about the high driving position. Which makes you feel important at the expense of trivialities like being able to see pedestrians and cyclists before you hit them and burning a sensible amount of fuel.



I find that's much more than that - the quality of the suspension system and the all-encompassing nature of the soundproofing: it means you can crush the ribcages of the poor while taking shortcuts around traffic lights without experiencing any discomfort or pavement noise.


----------



## kabbes (Aug 31, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Aston Martin join the SUV fray with the DBX and it's hideous. It looks Korean.


I am in bewilderment as to the point of that car.  What is its design brief?  

Unlike others here, I don't even hate the look of it.  I actually quite like the look of it.  But it's a sports car that's been fucked about with so that it's performance is shitter, but it still can't do anything practical (like cart things around) or rural (like drive in muddy fields).  So it's... a shit sports car?


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Aug 31, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> It's all about the high driving position. Which makes you feel important at the expense of trivialities like being able to see pedestrians and cyclists before you hit them and burning a sensible amount of fuel.


That plus the ride quality, lovely interior and shit off a shovel performance.


----------



## DownwardDog (Aug 31, 2017)

kabbes said:


> What is its design brief?



Make a car which will sell well with a huge margin in the Middle East and China.

Under the new boss (who came from Infiniti) AM have become a completely marketing led operation. Most of the tech stuff (powertrain, electronics) is outsourced to Mercedes-AMG.


----------



## kabbes (Aug 31, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Make a car which will sell well with a huge margin in the Middle East and China.
> 
> Under the new boss (who came from Infiniti) AM have become a completely marketing led operation. Most of the tech stuff (powertrain, electronics) is outsourced to Mercedes-AMG.


Well, I suppose its a brief.  But it rather begs the question.  Why will it sell well -- what is it that people are looking for in a car for which this is the answer?


----------



## hash tag (Aug 31, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> How's that an SUV? The point of an SUV is that a middle-aged man can get out of it without the use of some kind of lifting device.



You mean wrinklies?  Besides, I thought you were fitter than that.



SpookyFrank said:


> It's all about the high driving position. Which makes you feel important at the expense of trivialities like being able to see pedestrians and cyclists before you hit them and burning a sensible amount of fuel.



Do you really need to feel important and do you really need a badge to do it? Have you a seat in parliament or local councillor?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 31, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> That plus the ride quality, lovely interior and shit off a shovel performance.



All these features are available in sensibly-sized cars that don't look like a stack of breezeblocks with a cocaine problem.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Aug 31, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> All these features are available in sensibly-sized cars that don't look like a stack of breezeblocks with a cocaine problem.


Who wants sensible? I want a huge fuck off sized lump of a thing


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 31, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> All these features are available in sensibly-sized cars that don't look like a stack of breezeblocks with a cocaine problem.



Never had you down as an Audi fan Frank, good call fella


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Aug 31, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Never had you down as an Audi fan Frank, good call fella


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 31, 2017)

kabbes said:


> I am in bewilderment as to the point of that car.  What is its design brief?
> 
> Unlike others here, I don't even hate the look of it.  I actually quite like the look of it.  But it's a sports car that's been fucked about with so that it's performance is shitter, but it still can't do anything practical (like cart things around) or rural (like drive in muddy fields).  So it's... a shit sports car?



Like the Audi Allroad range, same car raised an inch or so and some nasty plastic bits stuck on. Ruins the performance without enabling off road driving. Fugly and shite.


----------



## Teaboy (Aug 31, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> That plus the ride quality, lovely interior and shit off a shovel performance.



How do these things actually corner though?  I mean surely lower centre of gravity is better?

Also with the prevalence of SUV's and people carriers etc I wonder how much better visibility you actually get.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 31, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Who wants sensible? I want a huge fuck off sized lump of a thing



Yes well your Range Rover very much aimed at the sort of people who start 90% of their sentences with 'I want...'


----------



## hash tag (Aug 31, 2017)

My other car is an armoured people carrier BTW


----------



## Dogsauce (Aug 31, 2017)

kabbes said:


> Well, I suppose its a brief.  But it rather begs the question.  Why will it sell well -- what is it that people are looking for in a car for which this is the answer?



Projection of power/status, basically.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 31, 2017)

hash tag said:


> My other car is an armoured people carrier BTW
> 
> View attachment 114716



Perfect town runaround that. Bonus points for being moored up on double yellows


----------



## hash tag (Aug 31, 2017)

In central London no less.


----------



## weltweit (Aug 31, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Aston Martin join the SUV fray with the DBX and it's hideous. It looks Korean.


Pig ugly!

No in fact that is being unfair to pigs which are quite cute!


----------



## kebabking (Aug 31, 2017)

hash tag said:


> In central London no less.



Amateur...

I'm think of parking something like that in a disabled space at the top of Wyle Cop in Shrewsbury - it wouldn't just take up the space (and at least one other), but it's so wide it would also block the rest of the road. Shrewsbury would grind to a holt.


----------



## Poi E (Aug 31, 2017)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> That plus the ride quality, lovely interior and shit off a shovel performance.



Funny how UK motoring journos have for years slated bloated, soft Yank tanks and yet one has been made here and venerated for decades.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 31, 2017)

Dogsauce said:


> Projection of power/status, basically.



Or overcompensation for lack of same.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 31, 2017)

It's nothing to do with power or status but everything to do with pens size, or lack of


----------



## OzT (Sep 1, 2017)

hash tag said:


> It's nothing to do with power or status but everything to do with pens size, or lack of


 
wotz a pen got to do with it???


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 1, 2017)

Ehrm...


----------



## Teaboy (Sep 1, 2017)

kebabking said:


> Amateur...
> 
> I'm think of parking something like that in a disabled space at the top of Wyle Cop in Shrewsbury - it wouldn't just take up the space (and at least one other), but it's so wide it would also block the rest of the road. Shrewsbury would grind to a holt.



Either that or across two disabled bays in a co-op somewhere in Surrey.


----------



## ringo (Sep 1, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> You might need to up your game, we're seriously considering the SQ7 now, 4 pipes. And tbh, it's this thread that has prompted the serious consideration, "How can I be THE apex arsehole? SQ7".


I was looking at the Q5, quite large, the Q7 is tank sized. Just how big is your dog?


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Sep 1, 2017)

A Hilux 4WD might do. There are quite a few round here, as well as Nissan Navaras. Both would look very wanky in the Home Counties.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 1, 2017)

ringo said:


> I was looking at the Q5, quite large, the Q7 is tank sized. Just how big is your dog?



Lanky rather than big...

 



tbf we fancy an RS6, but genuinely this thread has got me thinking about the SQ7. Plus got flashed on the M3 last night, the RS6 might not be the most sensible thing...


----------



## kabbes (Sep 1, 2017)

Dogs don't need much room.  It's the kids that take up your car space, I'm guessing.


----------



## 2hats (Sep 1, 2017)

hash tag said:


> You mean wrinklies?  Besides, I thought you were fitter than that.
> 
> 
> 
> Do you really need to feel important and do you really need a badge to do it? Have you a seat in parliament or local councillor?


Cars for [soon to be] OAP coffin dodgers desperately trying to relive their youth/convince themselves they still have a purpose?

Road rage, rage against the dying of the light.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 1, 2017)

kabbes said:


> Dogs don't need much room.  It's the kids that take up your car space, I'm guessing.



Yep, Pepper's happy to be folded up in to quite a small package, the kids don't take up so much space by themselves, but a large car means there can be a decent gap between them in the back, which helps with the fighting...

The Q7 has three rows of seats, which would help even more with that.


----------



## kabbes (Sep 1, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Yep, Pepper's happy to be folded up in to quite a small package, the kids don't take up so much space by themselves, but a large car means there can be a decent gap between them in the back, which helps with the fighting...
> 
> The Q7 has three rows of seats, which would help even more with that.


That, and the copious amounts of general crap that kids seem to require wherever they go.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

Teaboy said:


> Either that or across two disabled bays in a co-op somewhere in Surrey.



What, they coop things in Surrey
How frightful.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

2hats said:


> Cars for [soon to be] OAP coffin dodgers desperately trying to relive their youth/convince themselves they still have a purpose?
> 
> Road rage, rage against the dying of the light.



See thread on estates: a quality cat, never raced, well looked after, a hearse.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 1, 2017)

kabbes said:


> That, and the copious amounts of general crap that kids seem to require wherever they go.



We seem to have cut that down by giving each one an i-pad and getting seat-back TV's installed so they can watch DVDs or play video games. 

Neither of them know the boredom joys of staring out of the window for 4 hours as our green and pleasant land zips by.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

What happened to car snooker, spot the Eddie stobart lorry etc.
kids never had it so good.


----------



## Teaboy (Sep 1, 2017)

hash tag said:


> What, they coop things in Surrey
> How frightful.



Only in the ghastly provinces of Surrey.  There's a decent Whole Foods and passable Waitrose in Richmond I believe.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

Regret my local waitrose is rubbish. I have wholefoods nearby by, buts now just a branch of Amazon.
i don't live in the country though (surrey).


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 1, 2017)

hash tag said:


> What happened to car snooker, spot the Eddie stobart lorry etc.
> kids never had it so good.



Neither of mine have to sit next to a sister chucking up every half hour or so either, they don't know they're fucking born.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 1, 2017)

i am looking for a new ( old) car. This thread is making me want to experience real time range rover sport ownership, just as an experiment.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

Fortunately, I can fit neither animals not children in my car, thank goodness. Passengers are BANNED from anything like eating or drinking when they get the privilege of being in her...people throwing up...OUT....


----------



## 2hats (Sep 1, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> i am looking for a new ( old) car. This thread is making me want to experience real time range rover sport ownership, just as an experiment.


Have you recently married a footballer?


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

Extended test drive...be careful how other drivers react to you.


----------



## Teaboy (Sep 1, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> i am looking for a new ( old) car. This thread is making me want to experience real time range rover sport ownership, just as an experiment.



How do you feel about completing most journeys in a RAC van?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 1, 2017)

2hats said:


> Have you recently married a footballer?


 
Just wondering how it would feel and how others on the road would treat me


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

Does it have to be a 4x4?
the rear wheel drive Stelvio is now on sale starting at just over £30k.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 1, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> Just wondering how it would feel and how others on the road would treat me



Others would feel inferior and treat you like a god.

They would display this by never letting you in to the flow of traffic and a variety of hand gestures.


----------



## Teaboy (Sep 1, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Others would feel inferior and treat you like a god.



Unless you live in Chelsea in which case they would wonder why you couldn't afford a better trim.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Others would feel inferior and treat you like a god.
> 
> They would display this by never letting you in to the flow of traffic and a variety of hand gestures.



Just like they do Audi drivers really.


----------



## kebabking (Sep 1, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> Just wondering how it would feel and how others on the road would treat me



I'm told that the first time is a bit uncomfortable, but that you get used to it fairly quickly -  just be sure to use lots of lube and try a bit of foreplay.

Broadly I think society, and therefore other road users, looks down on footballers spouses - the image is of someone who swaps whatever potential they have for a guilded cage with a bit of public humiliation thrown in when their footballer gets caught with an aspiring 'glamour model'...


----------



## 2hats (Sep 1, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> Just wondering how it would feel and how others on the road would treat me


Persevere long enough and they might invite you to redesign the interior.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 1, 2017)

Just remembered and wow


----------



## pogofish (Sep 26, 2017)

Spotted in Aberdeen last week:


----------



## dessiato (Sep 26, 2017)

I was talking to a friend recently who told me I "need" an X3 or X5. I'm not sure I do.


----------



## Griff (Sep 26, 2017)

dessiato said:


> I was talking to a friend recently who told me I "need" an X3 or X5. I'm not sure I do.



I jokingly said to a mate recently that 'I needed a five litre two seater in my life' after buying one.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 26, 2017)

Griff said:


> I jokingly said to a mate recently that 'I needed a five litre two seater in my life' after buying one.



How many gallons to the mile?


----------



## Griff (Sep 26, 2017)

I try not to think along those lines.


----------



## dessiato (Sep 26, 2017)

ViolentPanda said:


> How many gallons to the mile?





Griff said:


> I try not to think along those lines.


Years ago I had one of these



Fuel costs became an issue, 10mpg. Unless you wanted to put your foot down a bit. Then it was very thirsty.


----------



## Griff (Sep 26, 2017)

Well for weekend only use (thinking about the environment and all that), it's really not that much of an issue. 
But for something like an Aix-en-Provence trip like we did in the 3.0 TVR S a few years back, it's a different kettle of fish.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 29, 2017)

What is it, Griff? Another TVR?


----------



## Griff (Sep 30, 2017)

Yep, a Chimaera 500. Most were made with the 4 litre V8 and only a few had the 5 fitted. Sends a tingle down my spine every time I start it up.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 30, 2017)

350 is the recommended minimum dose


----------



## Griff (Sep 30, 2017)

Viewing image uWK6t.jpg


----------



## hash tag (Sep 30, 2017)

I have had to hire a car for a few days in order to get elderly in laws into when going away. Because of complications at the hire place, we are getting a BMW X5

It is just as well we are going somewhere where we are not known. ​


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 30, 2017)

hash tag said:


> I have had to hire a car for a few days in order to get elderly in laws into when going away. Because of complications at the hire place, we are getting a BMW X5
> 
> It is just as well we are going somewhere where we are not known.​



Alfa broken down again?


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 30, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Alfa broken down again?



Ooh, you bitch!!!


----------



## hash tag (Sep 30, 2017)

Question is, do I drive the beemer like the average beemer driver or do I drive normally? I have already surprised a few people by being polite. On the other hand, I have already cut up an Audi  And upset a cyclist


----------



## hash tag (Sep 30, 2017)

PS. The Alfa is much better than the awful want mobile and is fine and beautiful, as ever.


----------



## kebabking (Sep 30, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Question is, do I drive the beemer like the average beemer driver or do I drive normally?...



drive it like you stole it.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 8, 2017)

Outside my local a while ago


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 8, 2017)

Those Overfinch / Khan ones score extra wanker points.

Some type of Range Rover parked squarely in the cycle lane at the point where you enter it after a junction when I was out earlier (a solid line mandatory one).  To add insult to injury I then got tooted at angrily by some car behind me for not being in the cycle lane that I couldn't get into because twat.


----------



## kebabking (Oct 8, 2017)

Some in our village has a Range Rover Sport Revere - they, err... don't really fit in.

It is _utterly_ hideous.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 8, 2017)

Was up in Kensington today, one of them six wheel Mercs was pissing about from Queens Gate to Exhibition Road, cunt driving looked like a right belllend, then he tried to turn around and got stuck, which greatly amused everyone present.


----------



## pogofish (Oct 9, 2017)

I seem to have managed to track the gold Merc to its lair:






Knowing what that car park serves, it concerns me that the vehicle may be owned by an actual Doktor Bling...!


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 9, 2017)

kebabking said:


> Some in our village has a Range Rover Sport Revere - they, err... don't really fit in.
> 
> It is _utterly_ hideous.


 
I know someone with a revere. he is a cunt. Small sample size I admit but I am willing to chance a conclusion anyway


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 9, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> I know someone with a revere. he is a cunt. Small sample size I admit but I am willing to chance a conclusion anyway



Never heard of them but a quick google throws up some right horrors, could well be the ultimate tosser motor.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 9, 2017)

Vehicle Sales - Range Rover Sport 3.0 SDV6 HSE featuring a Revere HSR Widebody Conversion - 7 seater - Revere London

I, almost, like it. If I had that sort of money to buy a car I'm sure I could think of something nicer.


----------



## kebabking (Oct 9, 2017)

dessiato said:


> Vehicle Sales - Range Rover Sport 3.0 SDV6 HSE featuring a Revere HSR Widebody Conversion - 7 seater - Revere London
> 
> I, almost, like it. If I had that sort of money to buy a car I'm sure I could think of something nicer.



which team was it that got relegated last year?

does it come with a shiny grey suit thats several sizes too small, a watch about the size of a dustbin lid, and _lots_ of hair product?


----------



## hash tag (Oct 9, 2017)

£70k for that, a premier loved motor....could get something half decent for that.


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 9, 2017)

Fifteen grand more than my house cost. You could have bought my house and still had enough left over for a pretty decent car. Bewildering.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 10, 2017)

Dogsauce said:


> Fifteen grand more than my house cost. You could have bought my house.



They weren't making Range Rovers in 1957, though.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 12, 2017)

Is the soon to be launched roller the ultimate, in bad taste?
Diamond in the rough: everything we know about the 4x4 Rolls-Royce Cullinan


----------



## hash tag (Oct 12, 2017)

Unless you are small...Hamleys unveils its top 10 Christmas toys for 22017...
theres range rover at no. 11


----------



## hash tag (Oct 12, 2017)

One drives vehicles, not flies them over hedges Van wedged into cottage wall after crash in Bedfordshire


----------



## Poi E (Oct 12, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Is the soon to be launched roller the ultimate, in bad taste?
> Diamond in the rough: everything we know about the 4x4 Rolls-Royce Cullinan



There goes another venerable brand. They'll sell loads.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 13, 2017)

Overfinch soft top evoque @ £60k second hand

jesus fucking Christ- it looks like a pram.

This is why I want this country to be destroyed by Kim Jong Un's Nuclear arsenal. Now


----------



## hash tag (Oct 13, 2017)

Is that shortened or even a 2 seated, it looks no bigger in the cabin.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Oct 13, 2017)

hash tag said:


> Is that shortened or even a 2 seated, it looks no bigger in the cabin.



Barely big enough for that fucking Chihuahua in the front. 

You just know a person is a grade-A, gold-plated cunt if they own a customised Evoque *AND* a Chihuahua!!


----------



## Poi E (Oct 14, 2017)

I know a nice chihuahua. Not their fault they attract cunts.


----------



## A380 (Oct 14, 2017)

not-bono-ever said:


> View attachment 117727
> 
> Overfinch soft top evoque @ £60k second hand
> 
> ...



A definition of eternity. Every day you key the paint work on that fucker. Even when you had worn out every key in a branch of Timpson’s eternity would not have been dented.

On the other hand, you’d never get tired of keying that tosser-mobile.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 14, 2017)

You know that fucker will leak.


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 14, 2017)

Somewhere to be sick into after a daytime drinking session. A warm meal for the chihuahua at least.


----------



## weltweit (Oct 14, 2017)

A Discovery pulled in behind me today and it struck me that LandRover have now developed them into just the sort of cunts car that RangeRovers are.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 14, 2017)

And they look cheap.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 15, 2017)

The new Disco really is one of the worst looking cars available to buy today. The old ones where pretty good if you were in to that kind of thing, but always a bit of a cunt magnet, see Kenny Noye for further clarification.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 15, 2017)

weltweit said:


> A Discovery pulled in behind me today and it struck me that LandRover have now developed them into just the sort of cunts car that RangeRovers are.



They've been on that slippery slope for a while now, ever since they invented the Freelander.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 16, 2017)

SpookyFrank said:


> They've been on that slippery slope for a while now, ever since they invented inflicted the Freelander.



FTFY.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 21, 2017)

A Chinese SUV that's going to be sold as a Lotus. A move which in no way devalues the storied marque.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 21, 2017)

Colin Chapman will be reciprocating in his grave.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 21, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> A Chinese SUV that's going to be sold as a Lotus. A move which in no way devalues the storied marque.


No. I refuse to accept this. It is wrong, completely and utterly and totally wrong.


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 21, 2017)

Tbf it doesn't look as chunky and stupid as most SUVs, quite sleek. Still not a Lotus.


----------



## Griff (Oct 21, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> A Chinese SUV that's going to be sold as a Lotus. A move which in no way devalues the storied marque.



God, that just goes against everything that a Lotus should be. Sad times we live in.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 21, 2017)

It'll probably be reliable, too.


----------



## A380 (Oct 23, 2017)

Poi E said:


> It'll probably be reliable, too.


Just as long as it won’t start on cold damp  days.


----------



## A380 (Oct 26, 2017)

BMW driver trying to overtake supersonic car


----------



## hash tag (Nov 27, 2017)

In the huge, wide open roads of Battersea, this is what I saw on arrival at the gym earlier; 4 4x4's. One was an XC90. so no half measures!


----------



## hash tag (Nov 29, 2017)

It's just a range rover Six-figure SVAutobiography gets 565hp | PistonHeads


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 30, 2017)

hash tag said:


> It's just a range rover Six-figure SVAutobiography gets 565hp | PistonHeads



It's a very pleasant space to occupy while you wait for the tow truck.


----------



## Poi E (Nov 30, 2017)

That is rather nice.


----------



## kebabking (Nov 30, 2017)

I fear that we are diverging from the crux of this matter - the premiership footballer test....


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 1, 2017)

6x6 Ford Velociraptor. For when conditions are particularly treacherous outside Walmart.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Dec 1, 2017)

you could get a big old gun rack in that . and enough space for some hunted critters in the back


----------



## DotCommunist (Dec 1, 2017)

I can just see the sort of microdicked gutlord who would love that fuckin thing. Theres some tasteless shit on this thread but that ones going some


----------



## Poi E (Dec 1, 2017)

So easy to work under the tank. I'd buy that for a dollar.


----------



## High Voltage (Dec 1, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> 6x6 Ford Velociraptor. For when conditions are particularly treacherous outside Walmart.



Now, y'see. I. LIKE. THAT.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 1, 2017)

It would look a picture in Godalming High Street.


----------



## High Voltage (Dec 1, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It would look a picture in Godalming High Street.



I was thinking more about Wells High Street


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 3, 2017)

The new LR Defender is quite something. _I've got an idea; let's make it look like an abandoned Suzuki concept car from the late 90s..._


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 3, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> The new LR Defender is quite something. _I've got an idea; let's make it look like an abandoned Suzuki concept car from the late 90s..._


Good lord that’s awful


----------



## T & P (Dec 3, 2017)

The one on the left looks like the outcome of a one night stand between a Suzuki and a Mini.


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Dec 4, 2017)

Why does the one on the right have pushbike sized wheels?


----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 4, 2017)

Do you think the designers know they're producing something so utterly tasteless, do you think it's actually in the spec? 'Your mission: design something that pricks will buy'.

Did one of them have one of these as a kid and used it as an inspiration?


----------



## kebabking (Dec 4, 2017)

It's the new Audi TT - hairdressers and estate agents....


----------



## Sweet FA (Dec 4, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> The new LR Defender is quite something. _I've got an idea; let's make it look like an abandoned Suzuki concept car from the late 90s..._


Pat's going to love it.


----------



## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 4, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> The new LR Defender is quite something. _I've got an idea; let's make it look like an abandoned Suzuki concept car from the late 90s..._



 

.....it's a mini on steroids......


----------



## A380 (Dec 4, 2017)

Dogsauce said:


> Do you think the designers know they're producing something so utterly tasteless, do you think it's actually in the spec? 'Your mission: design something that pricks will buy'.
> 
> Did one of them have one of these as a kid and used it as an inspiration?
> 
> View attachment 122060


You bastard. Now I’m going to be on e-bay trying to waste my money.


----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 4, 2017)

kebabking said:


> It's the new Audi TT - hairdressers and estate agents....



...and the wretched children of rich/aspirational parents

(Guy over the back from me in Leeds who sent his kid to grammar school bought one of the wanky minis for his kid, every now and then all his sixth-form mates would turn up and there'd be a small whatever-the-collective-noun-is of new minis parked up the side road, crewed by gym-bred preening twats with puffed up boy-band hair. Humanity, this is your future).


----------



## Poi E (Dec 4, 2017)

That’s pretty much my standard grumble for any young bloke with a full head of hair


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 8, 2017)

Ferrari people = wankers
Stretched limo wankers = wankers

Combine the two...


----------



## hash tag (Dec 8, 2017)

Oh Bahnhof Strasse
That sounds like the jealousy of someone who wants a Ferrari!
BTW, only 10?
lamborghini urus 10 things  - Bing


----------



## SaskiaJayne (Dec 8, 2017)

Photoshop surely ?


----------



## A380 (Dec 8, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Ferrari people = wankers
> Stretched limo wankers = wankers
> 
> Combine the two...
> ...



I hope that’s a personalised plate where that thing is registered.be a shame to settle for two out of three.


----------



## rubbershoes (Dec 9, 2017)

kebabking said:


> It's the new Audi TT - hairdressers and estate agents....




except the TT was quite reliable


----------



## rubbershoes (Dec 9, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Ferrari people = wankers
> Stretched limo wankers = wankers
> 
> Combine the two...
> ...




I want to see how that does at the Nurburgring

with a pissed hen party in the back, of course


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 13, 2017)

LS3 engined 6x6 Defender. I feel like the first 8x8 conversions can only be months away.


----------



## Poi E (Dec 13, 2017)

Decent engine at last.


----------



## Poi E (Dec 13, 2017)

I've got to wax lyrical about the Chevy engines like the LS series. You can buy he whole engine from carb models through to the latest ones in crate form. Installation is made a breeze with loads of adaptors and support out there and the engines are no longer the hefty guzzling iron blocks of old. Saying this as someone who has pissed around a lot with turbo charged Jap engines.


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 13, 2017)

Poi E said:


> I've got to wax lyrical about the Chevy engines like the LS series. You can buy he whole engine from carb models through to the latest ones in crate form. Installation is made a breeze with loads of adaptors and support out there and the engines are no longer the hefty guzzling iron blocks of old. Saying this as someone who has pissed around a lot with turbo charged Jap engines.



The LS series are fantastic engines that are often either maligned or ignored by techno snobs wanking over vanos or vtec. They are relatively small and light and make a ton of power and torque very reliably. The LS3 head flows about 320cfm; those were NASCAR numbers not so long ago.

The bloke I share my rented workshop with has an E36 cabrio with an LS2 which is ridiculously fast. It will still be drifting and banging limiter on the track long after all the SR20s/2JZs/RB26s have overheated.


----------



## Poi E (Dec 13, 2017)

Advances  in engine construction have minimised the differences between OHC and pushrod but you get the latter's durability. Really good motors. Been in an LS1 in an RX7 and it was brilliant.


----------



## twentythreedom (Dec 13, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> LS3 engined 6x6 Defender. I feel like the first 8x8 conversions can only be months away.


Christ, that is hideous


----------



## Poi E (Dec 13, 2017)

Agree. Needs a gold wrap.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 13, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> LS3 engined 6x6 Defender. I feel like the first 8x8 conversions can only be months away.


I quite like that


----------



## High Voltage (Dec 13, 2017)

So, 4 at the back and 4 up front, with front and rear steering

Its the future


----------



## dessiato (Dec 13, 2017)

High Voltage said:


> So, 4 at the back and 4 up front,
> 
> Its the future


Sounds like the plot for a bad porn movie


----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 13, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> LS3 engined 6x6 Defender. I feel like the first 8x8 conversions can only be months away.



I can definitely see that appealing to a certain type of gay man, it's just so bloke.


----------



## twentythreedom (Dec 16, 2017)

Poi E said:


> Agree. Needs a gold wrap.


And a supercharger for the v8


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 17, 2017)

twentythreedom said:


> And a supercharger for the v8
> 
> View attachment 123155



Weak. Twin turbos plus supercharger is the way to go.


----------



## High Voltage (Dec 17, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> Weak. Twin turbos plus supercharger is the way to go.



It would appear to also have a 200 hit of nitrous as well. Probably to help spool the turbos up to avoid any turbo lag.


----------



## mauvais (Dec 17, 2017)

Hopefully one of those intakes is a periscope.


----------



## Poi E (Dec 17, 2017)

So easy to work on that engine


----------



## Poi E (Dec 17, 2017)

gotta be a space frame under there and not just a roll cage


----------



## Part 2 (Dec 21, 2017)

This is cunts car of the moment around Manchester. I can't go anywhere without seeing someone hanging behind the traffic so they can do a 200m sprint to hear their own exhaust backfiring.


----------



## weltweit (Dec 21, 2017)

Sorry to have to say. 

But in the recent snow and ice.

Someone I know had an LR Evoke and it was very useful.


----------



## T & P (Dec 21, 2017)

weltweit said:


> Sorry to have to say.
> 
> But in the recent snow and ice.
> 
> Someone I know had an LR Evoke and it was very useful.


Might as well get an Audi though...


----------



## Poi E (Dec 23, 2017)

Pity Subaru have dropped the ball on the WRX.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 23, 2017)

T & P said:


> Might as well get an Audi though...



This is basically the answer to any question


----------



## A380 (Dec 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> This is basically the answer to any question


What like: 

How do I make people hate me?

How do I let my neighbors know I have a small penis?

How can I warn people of my poor lane discipline?


----------



## Leafster (Dec 23, 2017)

I just got stuck behind one of these in a Christmas shopping traffic jam.






The asymmetry of the number plate made me feel quite agitated. I wanted to get out and rearrange it.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 23, 2017)

The new Discos are seriously fugly, now we can see the new Defender it seems that their new direction is clear.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 23, 2017)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> The new Discos are seriously fugly, now we can see the new Defender it seems that their new direction is clear.


It's "How ugly can we make this car?"


----------



## Poi E (Dec 23, 2017)

Look cheaply made, too.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Dec 23, 2017)

A380 said:


> What like:
> 
> How do I make people hate me?
> 
> ...



And don't forget:

How do I let my wife know I've a predilection for arse-fucking a rabbit?


----------



## dylanredefined (Dec 23, 2017)

DownwardDog said:


> LS3 engined 6x6 Defender. I feel like the first 8x8 conversions can only be months away.


   My inner child loves it.  Can't be the only one who thought that on seeing it. Probably too expensive to see many of them and it's a landrover so ownership is its own punishment.
 Probably visiting a dominatrix is cheaper and more socially acceptable.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 23, 2017)

AUDI = accelerating unintentionally designed in.


----------



## Poi E (Jan 2, 2018)

Someone in Liverpool is ruing the day they bought a Range Rover.


----------



## bimble (Jan 8, 2018)

Jeeps: are these also only for arseholes? (particularly the wrangler, which comes in camouflage automatic)


----------



## kebabking (Jan 8, 2018)

bimble said:


> Jeeps: are these also only for arseholes? (particularly the wrangler, which comes in camouflage automatic)



No, old - 15/20 yo - ones are often used in the proper countryside as proper 4x4's. Personally I'm not overly keen as their reliability can be a bit crap, and sourcing parts can be a bit problematic, but certainly the Grand Cherokee of old (£1500 in autotrader) will do the mucky, snowy business.

As ever, there's a bit of snobbery involved with cars - if you turn up to the Ruthin Agricultural show in July in a 20yo mud splattered Grand Cherokee people will think you're  a a hill farmer, but that if you turn up in brand new £30k Jeep people will assume you're a hairdresser or footballers wife...

Bizarrely, if you turn up in a brand new £30k Shogun they'll assume you're a hill farmer.

Good luck navigating the minefield!


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 9, 2018)

bimble said:


> Jeeps: are these also only for arseholes? (particularly the wrangler, which comes in camouflage automatic)



Automatics are preferable in super technical off road situations as you have a torque convertor and don't have to slip the clutch constantly resulting in your car smelling like a burning sardine cannery.

Jeeps are better than Land Rovers obviously but that's not saying much. They are good for serious off road use as there is a ton of after market support for lifting them, etc.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 9, 2018)

cute n tastefull


----------



## bimble (Jan 9, 2018)

the ones with nice faces sell really quickly it looks like.. these were both on ebay yesterday and both now sold / gone.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 9, 2018)

bimble said:


> the ones with nice faces sell really quickly it looks like.. these were both on ebay yesterday and both now sold / gone.
> View attachment 124917 View attachment 124919



And how is the hairdressing business these days?

So, a convertible - and you've been to North Wales you say...


----------



## bimble (Jan 9, 2018)

I know, I'm being ridiculous. But the sensible compact japanese 4x4s are all unnecessarily ugly.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 9, 2018)

bimble said:


> I know, I'm being ridiculous. But the sensible compact japanese 4x4s are all unnecessarily ugly.



I'd really recommend having a look at the Nissan Terrano. They are smaller than a Mondeo estate, but very reliable, very capable, and good at moving crap long distances.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 9, 2018)

I wouldn't mind one of these as a plaything...british, small and rather cute. Trouble is quite old, rare and attracting a premium


----------



## bimble (Jan 9, 2018)

That is beautiful. Its even called Pea .


----------



## kebabking (Jan 9, 2018)

hash tag said:


> I wouldn't mind one of these as a plaything...british, small and rather cute. Trouble is quite old, rare and attracting a premium
> View attachment 124921



I bet it even has its own category of RAC membership.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 10, 2018)

kebabking said:


> I bet it even has its own category of RAC membership.



It's on the "TVR Plan" where an RAC van just follows you on every journey to save time.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 10, 2018)

kebabking said:


> I'd really recommend having a look at the Nissan Terrano. They are smaller than a Mondeo estate, but very reliable, very capable, and good at moving crap long distances.



And the 200hp SR20DET motor from the Nissan Silvia bolts straight in.


----------



## Poi E (Jan 10, 2018)

...


----------



## Poi E (Jan 10, 2018)

bimble said:


> Jeeps: are these also only for arseholes? (particularly the wrangler, which comes in camouflage automatic)



The older ones have a "proper 4WD"  beardy ale drinker following, usually ex-Defender guys who thought they had seen the light. Turned out to be the engine management warning.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 18, 2018)

The V8 Defender is back for some reason and now in 5.0 form. 150 grand to you, squire. Halfords wheel trims thrown in, apparently.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 18, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> The V8 Defender is back for some reason and now in 5.0 form. 150 grand to you, squire. Halfords wheel trims thrown in, apparently.



Is it wrong that I still have a bit of a horn for a lovely, boxy Defender?

They're shit obviously, and you may as well just BBQ £50 notes and get a taxi, but they do _look_ great...


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 18, 2018)

kebabking said:


> Is it wrong that I still have a bit of a horn for a lovely, boxy Defender?
> 
> They're shit obviously, and you may as well just BBQ £50 notes and get a taxi, but they do _look_ great...



I've got to admit I've been tempted a few times but I've never pulled the trigger. I think if you _absolutely had to_ then the wise move would be a mid 90s example imported from South Africa (no rust) where they could be obtained with the 2.8 BMW M52 petrol engine. 






Go on, you know you want to...


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 18, 2018)

kebabking 

I've done the leg work for you.

1999 Land Rover Defender 2.8i CSW | City Centre | Gumtree Classifieds South Africa | 219583639

He wants 12 grand, you'll get it for 10. Bite his hand off.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 4, 2018)

Just in case you still haven't found your ultimate 4x4 yet, perhaps you could try here

Jeep Trucks for Sale


----------



## hash tag (Feb 21, 2018)

Stopping for petro on my way to work yesterday, I saw a brand new range rover in the petrol station. It was parked up to one side of the forecourt together with a fuel rescue van.
Musn't laugh, it could happen to any one of us


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 21, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Stopping for petro on my way to work yesterday, I saw a brand new range rover in the petrol station. It was parked up to one side of the forecourt together with a fuel rescue van.
> Musn't laugh, it could happen to any one of us



You should’ve got a picture.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 21, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Stopping for petro on my way to work yesterday, I saw a brand new range rover in the petrol station. It was parked up to one side of the forecourt together with a fuel rescue van.
> Musn't laugh, it could happen to any one of us



at least they are starting RR ownership properly and getting used to having roadside assistance as a normal part of owning one of these ghastly vehicles


----------



## hash tag (Mar 2, 2018)

hash tag said:


> A Chelsea tractor, in Chelsea, in snow. There's a novelty.
> 
> View attachment 129058


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 2, 2018)

All the 4x4 tossrags round here are looking smug with themselves the past day or so, as if a drop of snow every 4 or 5 years justifies it all...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 2, 2018)

And this arsehole I followed the other day after it drove out of a prep school up the hill, gets to the narrowest bit of road round here when we have to stop for the lights:



So the traffic that came up the other way had to stop and wait for our lights to go green and Mr Big Motor to move off, so the junction got blocked cos of his selfish existence on this planet.


----------



## Dogsauce (Mar 2, 2018)

I remember a big queue of traffic on my way to work a couple of years back because some ridiculous wide 4x4 was waiting to turn right into a school and nobody could squeeze past on the left, except smug twats like me on a bike. If they'd been in a normal-sized car or made the little darlings walk to school a few dozen people might have got to work on time. I reckon road tax should be punitively based on vehicle width for this reason.


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 3, 2018)

A kid in our street has reached the apex in arsehole RC wheels.



It's a Traxxas TRX-4 and it's better engineered than a real Defender as it has portal axles and diff locks. Then again it costs 700 bucks (batteries not included) so it should be.


----------



## mauvais (Mar 3, 2018)

A Highways England Disco Inferno managed some successful if localised snow clearance on the M62 this week before slipping back into its natural hibernating state:


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 3, 2018)

WTF is 'Highways England'?


----------



## dessiato (Mar 3, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> WTF is 'Highways England'?


They're like PCSO for the motorways.


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 3, 2018)

dessiato said:


> They're like PCSO for the motorways.



I could see how the nation would be crying out for that.


----------



## mauvais (Mar 3, 2018)

It's what was the Highways Agency, renamed and repackaged into some government-owned company for reasons that noone can _possibly_ imagine.


----------



## kebabking (Mar 3, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> WTF is 'Highways England'?



Cheaper than coppers...


----------



## Dogsauce (Mar 3, 2018)

They just paint their cars to look like real police cars so all the Audi nobheads doing 90 in the fast lane have to slam on before realising it's not a real one and they can go about their business.


----------



## A380 (Mar 6, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> A kid in our street has reached the apex in arsehole RC wheels.
> 
> View attachment 129158
> 
> It's a Traxxas TRX-4 and it's better engineered than a real Defender as it has portal axles and diff locks. Then again it costs 700 bucks (batteries not included) so it should be.


TBF if it was made by a six year old out of an old shoe box and four peanut butter jar lids it would be better engineered than a real Defender...


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 7, 2018)

Range Rover Unveils a $295,000 Supercharged Coupe

$300k for something that will be keyed whenever you leave it on the street. And it will likely be sitting on the roadside fairly frequently given their reliability excellence.But at least you can be comfy in your luxury interior whilst you wait for the green flag man to finish his dinner and turn up to inform you that he cannot do anything about it because complexity


----------



## hash tag (Mar 16, 2018)

one more for the album. begs the question why?


----------



## dessiato (Mar 16, 2018)

hash tag said:


> one more for the album. begs the question why?


Nice shade of green I suppose. Reminds me of that shimmer you get on bluebottles.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 16, 2018)

killed by 1 inch of snow and broken down by the look of things. Narsty.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 16, 2018)

When I filled up this morning, there was a brand new black quasqai (?) being pumped out after using the wrong fuel. my phone was at home.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 16, 2018)

A Ford, built for navigating the occasional riot. Just $200,000

2016 USSV Rhino Review @ Top Speed


----------



## Poot (Mar 16, 2018)

dessiato said:


> They're like PCSO for the motorways.


They're not really. They look after the actual roads, construction, maintenance etc so in that sense they have a purpose...


----------



## weltweit (Mar 16, 2018)

Was just behind an Overfinch Vogue. I would like to be able to say that the driver behaviour was appalling but unfortunately they turned off into a side road before I could observe more.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 16, 2018)

I knew someone who now has a white overfinch as the family runabout.

he is a cunt unsurprisingly.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 16, 2018)

You admit, on here, to knowing somebody with one of those things


----------



## DotCommunist (Mar 16, 2018)

hash tag said:


> A Ford, built for navigating the occasional riot. Just $200,000
> 
> 2016 USSV Rhino Review @ Top Speed
> 
> View attachment 130150


that looks like it needs a machine un turret and gunners seat at the back. Suburban GI Joe


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 16, 2018)

hash tag said:


> You admit, on here, to knowing somebody with one of those things


 

*Knew*, someone a long long time ago in a place far far away. part of my old macho life


----------



## Poi E (Mar 19, 2018)

Saw Range Rover versus Ferrari 360 on the M25 on Saturday. Ferrari came off worse, but it was tough having sympathy for either of them.

edit: the Ferrari, because WTF driving in those conditions, and the RR, because cunts.


----------



## nuffsaid (Mar 23, 2018)

My mate has bought a Land Rover Defender.................lives in West Ealing.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 23, 2018)

the cursed earth of west ealing. jesus


----------



## hash tag (Mar 23, 2018)




----------



## kebabking (Mar 23, 2018)

I'm pretty sure I'm about to buy a Nissan Pathfinder - but then I live in the Shires, and have dogs and a goat...


----------



## Dieselpunk2000 (Mar 23, 2018)

Oops!


----------



## twentythreedom (Mar 23, 2018)

Demonstrating the offroading ability


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 23, 2018)

how in the name of fuck do you lose control of a 4WD automatic on a suburban street, demolosh a telegraph pole and knock over a brick wall & narrowly miss entering the living room of the 1930's semi the the bay window . How ? How ?


----------



## Dieselpunk2000 (Mar 23, 2018)

Hereford drivers-no survivors

Range Rover knocks down telegraph pole and wall in Hereford | Hereford Times


----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> how in the name of fuck do you lose control of a 4WD automatic on a suburban street, demolosh a telegraph pole and knock over a brick wall & narrowly miss entering the living room of the 1930's semi the the bay window . How ? How ?


I once saw a Golf GTI upside down on a straight road in the middle of a town. Bad drivers can have an accident just because they can.


----------



## Dogsauce (Mar 25, 2018)

Probably trying to run down someone's pet, which made a runner over the wall.


----------



## kebabking (Mar 25, 2018)

Dogsauce said:


> Probably trying to run down someone's pet, which made a runner over the wall.



Nah, it was Hereford - he was probably aiming for someone he suspected of being Welsh. Or some other outsider...


----------



## hash tag (Mar 26, 2018)

Was thinking the other day; was it the Frontera that was at the forefront of this craze for SUV's?





BTW 1 in 3 new cars in Europe is an SUV | Motoring Research


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Mar 26, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Was thinking the other day; was it the Frontera that was at the forefront of this craze for SUV's?
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Probably that and the Rav4. Hideous things really. Weren't fronteras shocking for reliability?


----------



## dessiato (Mar 26, 2018)

Rosemary Jest said:


> Probably that and the Rav4. Hideous things really. Weren't fronteras shocking for reliability?


Wasn't it also sold as a Nissan? I recall that and the Rav4 were both rubbish both on and off road.


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Mar 26, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Wasn't it also sold as a Nissan? I recall that and the Rav4 were both rubbish both on and off road.



Yes, completely antisocial vehicles that serve no other purpose than to bully other road users with their size and to give the driver an air of superiority by sitting up higher than people in sensible cars.

So, probably direct precursors to Range Rover Sports and their ilk.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 26, 2018)

I rent RAV4s when I go to Iceland ( not the shop) - they are fantastic on the gravel roads  and tracks. They are also quite dinky, so not sure where the size thing comes into it. The frontera is a nightmare of poor engineering - which as they were based on a half decent Isuzu, must have taken some doing.


----------



## mauvais (Mar 26, 2018)

Rosemary Jest said:


> Yes, completely antisocial vehicles that serve no other purpose than to bully other road users with their size and to give the driver an air of superiority by sitting up higher than people in sensible cars.
> 
> So, probably direct precursors to Range Rover Sports and their ilk.


The precursor to the Range Rover Sport was, it may amaze you to learn, the Range Rover.

The Frontera was never sold as Nissan. It was an Opel (obviously), Isuzu and Honda, in various places in the world.


----------



## hot air baboon (Mar 26, 2018)

Reported to cost £1.56 million, the Karlmann King SUV boasts a 6.8-litre V10 and optional bulletproofing
A common complaint among car fans is that all SUVs look the same. But when it comes to the limited run Karlmann King, nothing could be further from the truth. Based on a Ford F-550, the Karlmann King is designed by Chinese company IAT and built by a team in Europe, with the aim of offering a “stealth” vehicle that provides “an unprecedented visual feast”.

The Karlmann King is the world’s most expensive SUV



and I really think the bullet-proofing should come as standard tbh


----------



## DotCommunist (Mar 26, 2018)

why have they tried to make it look like its radar invisible


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 26, 2018)

somone has been watching too many Dredd and Batman movies


----------



## ringo (Mar 26, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> I rent RAV4s when I go to Iceland ( not the shop) - they are fantastic on the gravel roads  and tracks. They are also quite dinky, so not sure where the size thing comes into it. The frontera is a nightmare of poor engineering - which as they were based on a half decent Isuzu, must have taken some doing.


I've had a Rav4 for five years. Quite cheap, not that big, 4 wheel drive useful in shitty weather, not that thirsty, fits loads in the back. Very functional car.


----------



## Poi E (Mar 26, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> how in the name of fuck do you lose control of a 4WD automatic on a suburban street, demolosh a telegraph pole and knock over a brick wall & narrowly miss entering the living room of the 1930's semi the the bay window . How ? How ?



 Because you appreciate inter-war architecture?


----------



## hot air baboon (Mar 27, 2018)

DotCommunist said:


> why have they tried to make it look like its radar invisible


----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 27, 2018)

Dieselpunk2000 said:


> View attachment 130749
> 
> Oops!




It's probably not the driver's house so they don't give a shit


----------



## A380 (Mar 28, 2018)

hot air baboon said:


>


Lasers now though innit. 

Perhaps it has its own lasers in the headlamps?


----------



## T & P (Mar 28, 2018)

Must be a bugger when you find yourself at one of those traffic lights that only turn green when they detect a vehicle waiting.


----------



## Farmer Giles (Mar 29, 2018)

My mate had one of those Frontera things and is was super shit. Badly built and unreliable, considering it was an Isuzu in a dress. He did have a boat to pull occasionally, so we cut him some slack.


----------



## Poi E (Mar 31, 2018)

Yeah thought Isuzu knew what they were doing. But then Luton build might have fucked things up.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 16, 2018)

Just in case anyone has a secret desire to own such a thing Shed of the Week: Range Rover | PistonHeads


----------



## Poi E (Apr 16, 2018)

Truly the antichrist at that age.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 19, 2018)




----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 19, 2018)

from an unscientific survey yesterday

* Range rover went the wrong way down cannon street so he didn't have to get caught up in the traffic jams- even the cabbies were shouting abuse at him as he raced past them & pedestrians jumping out of the way
* Audi R8 went north across the closed to public traffic London bridge, despite the TFL bods stopping and telling him there was only Bus and taxi access

All of this in 5 minutes.

hanging is too good for these people.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 24, 2018)

OOOps...Range Rover driver stuck up middle finger while using jammer to evade capture


----------



## 2hats (Apr 24, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Wasn't it also sold as a Nissan? I recall that and the Rav4 were both rubbish both on and off road.


A friend pretty much lives out of their Rav4 wild camping across Scotland, Ireland in the summer, France and Spain at times in the spring and autumn. Considers it ideal for what they need and is very happy with it.


DotCommunist said:


> why have they tried to make it look like its radar invisible


The designers/saledroids/customers are stupid (pick any combination or all)? At that scale the features will not defeat speed trap radar. If anything they might enhance the radar cross section for numerous viewing angles.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 24, 2018)

hash tag said:


> OOOps...Range Rover driver stuck up middle finger while using jammer to evade capture







			
				funny plod said:
			
		

> North Yorkshire Traffic Constable Andrew Forth said: "If you want to attract our attention, repeatedly gesturing at police camera vans with your middle finger while you're driving a distinctive car fitted with a laser jammer is an excellent way to do it.
> 
> "It's also an excellent way to end up in prison.


----------



## T & P (Apr 24, 2018)

Enjoy your stretch in jail, cunt


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 24, 2018)

they should crush the car as well. vulgar fucker


----------



## hash tag (Apr 24, 2018)

Spotted in the spiritual home if the Chelsea tractor


----------



## hash tag (Apr 27, 2018)

Mixed blessings...only 1 
Roof ripped off brand new Range Rover after 'driver forgot it was there'


----------



## Poi E (Apr 28, 2018)

Looks just like the movies! cool. Always wondered what would happen.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 30, 2018)

Becoming a 'thing' for Land Rover...


----------



## dessiato (Apr 30, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Becoming a 'thing' for Land Rover...
> 
> View attachment 134101


New gate and easy access to the garden.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 30, 2018)

Can smash through a brick wall with ease but will fail to make it from London to York without breaking down

what kind of fucking wanker buys these things to use in a city ? (rhetorical)


----------



## mauvais (Apr 30, 2018)

That looks like a pretty terrible wall to be fair. And Richard Branson will have to fork out for a new cabinet. Everyone's a winner here.


----------



## A380 (May 2, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Becoming a 'thing' for Land Rover...
> 
> View attachment 134101


Don’t know what the fuss is about, they are off road vehicles.

Thanks, I’m here all week.


----------



## patman post (May 2, 2018)

cypher79 said:


> Katy Price has a pink one


But surely hers is stretched...


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 2, 2018)

fuck off


----------



## patman post (May 2, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> fuck off


Too right. Come to think of it, it’s probably a Hummer...


----------



## kabbes (May 2, 2018)

patman post said:


> Too right. Come to think of it, it’s probably a Hummer...


Fuck off.


----------



## patman post (May 2, 2018)

A380 said:


> Don’t know what the fuss is about, they are off road vehicles.
> 
> Thanks, I’m here all week.


Supposedly so. But having all that plastic round the front lessens their ability to withstand rough terrain without expensive damage...


----------



## hash tag (May 3, 2018)

I guess it had to happen New luxury Vision Mercedes-Maybach SUV concept revealed - pictures
Flicking through the pics, this really does take the biscuit


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 3, 2018)

hash tag said:


> I guess it had to happen New luxury Vision Mercedes-Maybach SUV concept revealed - pictures
> Flicking through the pics, this really does take the biscuit


It's a concept car. It will never be produced for Joe Public.


----------



## hash tag (May 3, 2018)

It won't be for the likes of me, but it will be coming out next year probably.


----------



## ice-is-forming (May 3, 2018)

This is why you don't drive on the beach at high tide


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 3, 2018)

ice-is-forming said:


> This is why you don't drive on the beach at high tide


----------



## dessiato (May 3, 2018)




----------



## not-bono-ever (May 3, 2018)

rarely have cars been so well matched to their drivers skills


----------



## A380 (May 5, 2018)

ice-is-forming said:


> This is why you don't drive on the beach at high tide


Surely it was driving onto  the beach at low tide that was the problem there?


----------



## ice-is-forming (May 5, 2018)

A380 said:


> Surely it was driving onto  the beach at low tide that was the problem there?



That beach is 75ks long, people start their journey without checking the tide times. It's doable if you don't get bogged. They drove on, got bogged and the tide came in too fast to be rescued. It happens about once a week.


----------



## hash tag (May 7, 2018)

tommers said:


> I genuinely thought he'd died about a year ago.



Think pink!  (found looking at something else).


----------



## hash tag (May 8, 2018)

Fortunately only 328 of these were made (and if anyone fancies it, i know of one for sale)


----------



## Poi E (May 8, 2018)

Lamborghini?


----------



## kebabking (May 8, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Lamborghini?



Batman, shurely?


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 8, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Fortunately only 328 of these were made (and if anyone fancies it, i know of one for sale)


That looks like it was designed by a 6 year old with a new box of crayons.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 8, 2018)

I have never seen a RR sport on the motorway actually going anywhere, loaded to the gills, as it is designed for . I only ever see them being thrashed around urban streets, leaving only a faint whiff of chronic in their wake. I did 600 miles in a day over the weekend - never saw a RRS. as soon as I left the M25 on the homeward stretch, I am hemmed in by the fuckers . See also ML Mercedes. fucking hell


----------



## kebabking (May 8, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> I have never seen a RR sport on the motorway actually going anywhere, loaded to the gills, as it is designed for . I only ever see them being thrashed around urban streets, leaving only a faint whiff of chronic in their wake. I did 600 miles in a day over the weekend - never saw a RRS. as soon as I left the M25 on the homeward stretch, I am hemmed in by the fuckers . See also ML Mercedes. fucking hell



Range Rovers are actually quite small on the inside - you'd not want to be taking two kids and a dog on a weeks camping trip in one, you'd probably die of suffocation. their boot space is significantly smaller than a Mondeo/Octavia/A6.. if you want lots of space, off-road capability and comfort you'd go for a Disco/Shogun/Land Cruser/Pathfinder.

they aren't really a more comfortable version of the Disco, which is a more comfortable version of a Defender (which is how the LR/RR range used to go..), they are a higher-off-the-ground version of a 5 Series BMW. with added twat.


----------



## Poi E (May 9, 2018)

I saw a new Range Rover on the road yesterday but it might have been a Chinese knock off of the same. Poor panel gaps, orange peel paint etc. Actually, it probably was a RR.


----------



## ViolentPanda (May 14, 2018)

Poi E said:


> I saw a new Range Rover on the road yesterday but it might have been a Chinese knock off of the same. Poor panel gaps, orange peel paint etc. Actually, it probably was a RR.



British workmanship to be proud of!


----------



## spitfire (May 16, 2018)

Highgate, yesterday. German plates.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 16, 2018)

Wow, Mansory, so pretty much double the cost of a normal cuntmobile. Really goes to show that taste cannot be bought.


----------



## Poi E (May 16, 2018)

Mansory?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 16, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Mansory?



 

Like Kahn or Overfinch, but for people with even more cash and less taste.


----------



## Poi E (May 16, 2018)

But the bits always fall off. Every Khan or Overfinch I've seen looks in a state of spontaneous disassembly. Or is that just ebay stick ons? who would know?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 16, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Or is that just ebay stick ons? who would know?



I guess whacking an Onyx badge on a 1999 Laguna might raise a smidgen of suspicion...


----------



## hash tag (May 28, 2018)

As spotted in West London yesterday, an "urban" rr.


----------



## Dogsauce (May 28, 2018)

The Tron special edition.


----------



## T & P (May 28, 2018)

Must belong to a footballer...


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 28, 2018)

narsty


----------



## Dr. Furface (May 28, 2018)

very narsty


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 28, 2018)

Front windows are too dark, OB will have that tasteless wankstain soon enough.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 29, 2018)

its just shit though. Alright, I am a snob, but I just did 3500 miles across eastern Europe and the Balkans in a £500 car with no issues. if I drove that on the same route, the popo would be lining up at every opportunity to pull me over - and it would probably have been pinched in Bosnia to boot


----------



## hash tag (Jun 6, 2018)

Just in case you thought an Audi didn't quite cut it







Audi Q8 launched to rival Range Rover Sport | PistonHeads


----------



## T & P (Jun 6, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Just in case you thought an Audi didn't quite cut it
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Even though it carries an even bigger ‘wanker’ tag than the Range Rover, if the choice was just these two I’d choose the Audi in a heartbeat.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jun 7, 2018)

T & P said:


> Even though it carries an even bigger ‘wanker’ tag than the Range Rover, if the choice was just these two I’d choose the Audi in a heartbeat.



It will get you where you want to go without needing to mither Green Flag and nothing will fall off it, for a start.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 23, 2018)

I know it's not range rover style, but, refreshingly honest


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 5, 2018)

Spotted on my walk home today...


----------



## hash tag (Jul 5, 2018)

That's nice, but, not the bomb proof one


----------



## T & P (Jul 6, 2018)

That number plate must have cost a few quid...


----------



## Grump (Jul 6, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> its just shit though. Alright, I am a snob, but I just did 3500 miles across eastern Europe and the Balkans in a £500 car with no issues. if I drove that on the same route, the popo would be lining up at every opportunity to pull me over - and it would probably have been pinched in Bosnia to boot


What car was it?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 6, 2018)




----------



## hash tag (Jul 6, 2018)

Excellent


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 6, 2018)

Prize if you can ID the location


----------



## Grump (Jul 6, 2018)

Borodyanka.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 6, 2018)

Too Far East. This is a disused airfield and if you drive from one end of the runway to another , you cross an international border


----------



## 2hats (Jul 6, 2018)

Željava Air Base, Croatia/B&H.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 6, 2018)

Boom


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 6, 2018)

feast upon its taped up bumpers


----------



## 2hats (Jul 6, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> feast upon its taped up bumpers


That would be the apex of the arse of your car?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 13, 2018)




----------



## 2hats (Jul 13, 2018)

Thread ends:


----------



## hash tag (Jul 13, 2018)

Was he in a RR...i thought he beast went everywhere with him


----------



## dessiato (Jul 13, 2018)

2hats said:


> Thread ends:



Which proves how much of an arse hole machine they've become.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 14, 2018)

Rezvani Tank. Russian aesthetics meets Fiat-Chrysler drivetrain for the worst of all possible worlds.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 14, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Rezvani Tank. Russian aesthetics meets Fiat-Chrysler drivetrain for the worst of all possible worlds.
> 
> View attachment 141199



Makes Land Rover look like a worthy option


----------



## High Voltage (Jul 14, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Rezvani Tank. Russian aesthetics meets Fiat-Chrysler drivetrain for the worst of all possible worlds.
> 
> View attachment 141199



Again, I quite like that - pop a couple of lasers and some serious strobes on it - and some underbody LEDs and you've got a tasty set of wheels


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 14, 2018)

$300k.

how many lada Nivas could you get for that?


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 15, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> $300k.
> 
> how many lada Nivas could you get for that?



It's called the Chevrolet Niva now. Despite a German engine and Japanese transmission it demonstrates fidelity to the Niva name by being a poorly built deathtrap.


----------



## Poi E (Jul 15, 2018)

Poorly-built death trap was what my father in law called Defenders  Still don't think I've seen a single one in Africa yet.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 15, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> It's called the Chevrolet Niva now. Despite a German engine and Japanese transmission it demonstrates fidelity to the Niva name by being a poorly built deathtrap.
> 
> View attachment 141240



Wrong, wrong, wrong...something like that is certainly not worthy of the Chevy name.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 15, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Wrong, wrong, wrong...something like that is certainly not worthy of the Chevy name.



Chevrolet is GM's low end brand in most of Asia and Europe. Hence insipid weirdness like the (made in Kazakhstan) Chevrolet Aveo.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 15, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Wrong, wrong, wrong...something like that is certainly not worthy of the Chevy name.



You've not seen the kind of shed that gets sold over here with a chevrolet badge then?

Their range includes this, the foulest-looking vehicle ever seen on Britain's roads:







I know, someone said, lets make a cross between a Nissan Prairie and a fucking hearse.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 15, 2018)

From classic to modern...


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 15, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> You've not seen the kind of shed that gets sold over here with a chevrolet badge then?
> 
> Their range includes this, the foulest-looking vehicle ever seen on Britain's roads:
> 
> ...


For some reason I quite like that


----------



## dessiato (Jul 15, 2018)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> For some reason I quite like that


Should've gone to Specsavers


----------



## A380 (Jul 15, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> It's called the Chevrolet Niva now. Despite a German engine and Japanese transmission it demonstrates fidelity to the Niva name by being a poorly built deathtrap.
> 
> View attachment 141240


I didn’t realise the Niva still existed. Did we fight the Cold War in vain?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 15, 2018)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> For some reason I quite like that



You also like Birmingham...


----------



## Poi E (Jul 17, 2018)

A380 said:


> I didn’t realise the Niva still existed. Did we fight the Cold War in vain?



Yup. Skoda survived, too. Yet Rover had to be put down. No justice.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 17, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> It's called the Chevrolet Niva now. Despite a German engine and Japanese transmission it demonstrates fidelity to the Niva name by being a poorly built deathtrap.
> 
> View attachment 141240



I like the look of that- a no nonsense box . But I like dacias and other cheap bottom feeding stuff so maybe I am biased


----------



## Poi E (Jul 17, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Yup. Skoda survived, too. Yet Rover had to be put down. No justice.



Seriously, what did the Czech government do to please VAG that the UK government didn't do to BMW in respect of Rover? Let a bunch of crooks run it, I suppose.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 17, 2018)

Germany have had a long standing interest in Skoda and it’s output.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 17, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Seriously, what did the Czech government do to please VAG that the UK government didn't do to BMW in respect of Rover? Let a bunch of crooks run it, I suppose.



VAG micromanaged Skoda from day one. BMW left Rover to their own incompetent devices until it was too late. They did get Mini out of it so their goal of achieving economies of scale through acquiring other brands half worked.


----------



## Poi E (Jul 17, 2018)

They micromanaged them too well. The latest Skodas have panel gaps better than some of the new Audis I've seen.


----------



## dylanredefined (Jul 17, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Poorly-built death trap was what my father in law called Defenders  Still don't think I've seen a single one in Africa yet.


Lots in Kenya not all British army. Either runs forever or dies 5minutes down the road. Engine exploding and catching fire as you role out the gate was the most impressive failure I seen.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 18, 2018)

to mark it's 70th birthday, a limited edition has been produced and was on show at Goodwood over the weekend. Sorry if it's your thing, but at £150,000, they are sold out.

Land Rover to build limited edition V8 Defender Works


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jul 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Sorry if it's your thing, but at £150,000, they are sold out.


Fool... Money... etc.


----------



## kebabking (Jul 18, 2018)

Saul Goodman said:


> Fool... Money... etc.



RAC membership...


----------



## dylanredefined (Jul 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> to mark it's 70th birthday, a limited edition has been produced and was on show at Goodwood over the weekend. Sorry if it's your thing, but at £150,000, they are sold out.
> There are several companies devoting to fixing land rovers none of them ask for more than a 100,000 quid .
> Land Rover to build limited edition V8 Defender Works


There are several companies that will fix a land rover into what ever you want none ask for more than 100,000 quid.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 19, 2018)

Orders are now being taken for this little beauty. Expect to pay around £250K


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 19, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Seriously, what did the Czech government do to please VAG that the UK government didn't do to BMW in respect of Rover? Let a bunch of crooks run it, I suppose.



If you want to talk about crooks have a quick look at the folks who bought Jaguar Land Rover.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 19, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Orders are now being taken for this little beauty. Expect to pay around £250K



I’m holding out for the Onyx makeover before I open my wallet.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 19, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Orders are now being taken for this little beauty. Expect to pay around £250K


For fucks sake


----------



## kebabking (Jul 19, 2018)

I like the shape of the front - good for batting away cyclists...


----------



## fishfinger (Jul 19, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Orders are now being taken for this little beauty. Expect to pay around £250K


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 20, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Orders are now being taken for this little beauty. Expect to pay around £250K



I would have one of these if I had the money. I bet they are a terrific proposition for long trips.


----------



## Dogsauce (Jul 20, 2018)

As long as the distance between fuel stations isn’t too great...


----------



## Poi E (Jul 20, 2018)

Chinese RR knock-off, right?


----------



## hash tag (Jul 30, 2018)

Ever get that sinking feeling when you see one? Range Rover gets stuck on Suffolk beach


----------



## rubbershoes (Jul 30, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Ever get that sinking feeling when you see one? Range Rover gets stuck on Suffolk beach



Oh dear 

What a shame


----------



## hash tag (Aug 4, 2018)

I saw a black one of these yesterday being driven by a young kid down the A214. At first I thought it was a Porsche Cayanne
until I saw the badge. Did sound rather nice!


----------



## BigTom (Aug 4, 2018)

rubbershoes said:


> Oh dear
> 
> What a shame



It's alright, I'm sure a good practical all-terrain vehicle like a range rover will have a winch or two to pull it out of difficult situations / pull other things out, right?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 4, 2018)

hash tag said:


> I saw a black one of these yesterday being driven by a young kid down the A214. At first I thought it was a Porsche Cayanne
> until I saw the badge. Did sound rather nice!



Shame about the name, bit too close to anus.


----------



## likesfish (Aug 4, 2018)

For people who found the Porsche Cayenne just too good looking.

I present the jag SUV it’s much uglier in the flesh all the charm of the BMW X3 but higher and smaller why anyone would want one god only nos


----------



## Saul Goodman (Aug 4, 2018)

likesfish said:


> I present the jag SUV


No, you don't


----------



## likesfish (Aug 4, 2018)

Tbf it really nsfanyone


----------



## T & P (Aug 4, 2018)

I can’t remember if it was in Spain during my recent holiday or in London, but has anyone else noticed a lot of Audi cars recently sporting the (imo at least) ugliest and weirdest paint colour ever seen on a car?

It basically is ‘1970s grey filing cabinet’. The same colour as you would expect to see on a metal filing cabinet in a Stasi office in East Berlin. Completely different to every other shade of grey ever seen before painted on a car. The kind of colour that can actually make you depressed just by looking at it. Hideous and weird as fuck to choose as a colour option.

Bahnhof Strasse are you aware of this sacrilege?


----------



## A380 (Aug 4, 2018)

T & P said:


> I can’t remember if it was in Spain during my recent holiday or in London, but has anyone else noticed a lot of Audi cars recently sporting the (imo at least) ugliest and weirdest paint colour ever seen on a car?
> 
> It basically is ‘1970s grey filing cabinet’. The same colour as you would expect to see on a metal filing cabinet in a Stasi office in East Berlin. Completely different to every other shade of grey ever seen before painted on a car. The kind of colour that can actually make you depressed just by looking at it. Hideous and weird as fuck to choose as a colour option.
> 
> Bahnhof Strasse are you aware of this sacrilege?


It’s to reflect the drivers’ personalities


----------



## Yogibear (Aug 4, 2018)

A horrible vehicle that does about 7 miles to the gallon in cities. Probably perfect for middle class paedos who have calculated how many children they could get in the boot.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 4, 2018)

T & P said:


> I can’t remember if it was in Spain during my recent holiday or in London, but has anyone else noticed a lot of Audi cars recently sporting the (imo at least) ugliest and weirdest paint colour ever seen on a car?
> 
> It basically is ‘1970s grey filing cabinet’. The same colour as you would expect to see on a metal filing cabinet in a Stasi office in East Berlin. Completely different to every other shade of grey ever seen before painted on a car. The kind of colour that can actually make you depressed just by looking at it. Hideous and weird as fuck to choose as a colour option.
> 
> Bahnhof Strasse are you aware of this sacrilege?



Not noticed this phenomenon, needs pictures. It’s probably Spymaster who doesn’t feel teh love for matt paint.


----------



## bellaozzydog (Aug 4, 2018)

Outside my house is a Range Rover, when it leaves, another car takes its place immediately 

I didn’t realise that the other car was just a place marker for the Range Rover.

In the mean time me and the neighbours have to park in another street (no doubt in front of someone else’s house)


----------



## not-bono-ever (Aug 4, 2018)

Car ferry  to Sicily. Sandwiched between 2x Audi’s. Both had their vile TD engine running about 16 minutes before we hit the port, despite crew asking them not to because confined space. Utter cunts.   Selfish utter cunts. Arsehole selfish utter cunts

Death is too good for these scum


----------



## not-bono-ever (Aug 4, 2018)

bellaozzydog said:


> Outside my house is a Range Rover, when it leaves, another car takes its place immediately
> 
> I didn’t realise that the other car was just a place marker for the Range Rover.
> 
> In the mean time me and the neighbours have to park in another street (no doubt in front of someone else’s house)




Each corner costs them about 200 quid if that sidewall gets damaged.big cars big bills


----------



## Spymaster (Aug 4, 2018)




----------



## T & P (Aug 4, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Not noticed this phenomenon, needs pictures. It’s probably Spymaster who doesn’t feel teh love for matt paint.


Here you go...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 5, 2018)

That’s bogging.


----------



## Poi E (Aug 5, 2018)

Seen a bit of that colour around. Gloom grey. Perfect Brexit colour.


----------



## A380 (Aug 5, 2018)

bellaozzydog said:


> Outside my house is a Range Rover, when it leaves, another car takes its place immediately
> 
> I didn’t realise that the other car was just a place marker for the Range Rover.
> 
> In the mean time me and the neighbours have to park in another street (no doubt in front of someone else’s house)


Let the tires down. Or set up a rota with the neighbors to try and get ready when you see activity to try and nip into the space...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 6, 2018)

T & P said:


> Here you go...




Seeing them everywhere now, Ford ST's seem to go for it too.


----------



## DownwardDog (Aug 6, 2018)

T & P said:


> I can’t remember if it was in Spain during my recent holiday or in London, but has anyone else noticed a lot of Audi cars recently sporting the (imo at least) ugliest and weirdest paint colour ever seen on a car?
> 
> It basically is ‘1970s grey filing cabinet’. The same colour as you would expect to see on a metal filing cabinet in a Stasi office in East Berlin. Completely different to every other shade of grey ever seen before painted on a car. The kind of colour that can actually make you depressed just by looking at it. Hideous and weird as fuck to choose as a colour option.
> 
> Bahnhof Strasse are you aware of this sacrilege?



It's "Nardo Grey" which Audi initially did as a colour on the RS3 and it was a sales sensation for them so they made it available on more models. Grey is now so popular that its a premium choice on some models. It's nearly $8k to have it on some models of BMW. The M2 Competition widebody looks _fire_ in grey.


----------



## Poi E (Aug 6, 2018)

I guess you can just put the clear coat on the primer. Saves money.


----------



## kebabking (Aug 6, 2018)

Poi E said:


> I guess you can just put the clear coat on the primer. Saves money.



I must admit that the first time I saw it - hammering _past _an Audi, obviously - I assumed it was some form of prototype still in its primer...


----------



## DotCommunist (Aug 6, 2018)

its like a gunmetal grey. 
like this sort of thing:





cars and penises exist in the same mental space, so perhaps thats why such a fuck dull colour adorns both the gun and the audi


----------



## not-bono-ever (Aug 6, 2018)

It’s not a bright colour because only children and girls like bright colours. Real proper driving by straight talking clarkson men are not children. They like this colour because they are NOT immature fucking children who need a long session on the naughty step and no smarties for a week


----------



## hash tag (Aug 6, 2018)

That could explain why I opted for a grey brera


----------



## Poi E (Aug 6, 2018)

DotCommunist said:


> its like a gunmetal grey.
> like this sort of thing:
> 
> 
> ...



Nice tooling. Always know where you are with a revolver.

Gun metal grey done proper


----------



## Saul Goodman (Aug 6, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Nice tooling. Always know where you are with a revolver.


No incriminating spent casings left at the SOC


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 6, 2018)

Saul Goodman said:


> No incriminating spent casings left at the SOC



So you can shoot yourself and get away with it.


----------



## DotCommunist (Aug 6, 2018)

hash tag said:


> That could explain why I opted for a grey brera


breretta


----------



## A380 (Aug 6, 2018)




----------



## Yogibear (Aug 6, 2018)

DotCommunist said:


> its like a gunmetal grey.
> like this sort of thing:
> 
> 
> ...



That's sparkley silver or something. This is gunmetal grey:

Royal Enfield Classic Gunmetal Grey - Features, Specifications & Reviews


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 6, 2018)

hash tag said:


> That could explain why I opted for a grey brera



It really is the colour of choice for tossers...



Spoiler: My car


----------



## hash tag (Aug 6, 2018)

Not been impounded or lost you licence yet then?


----------



## hash tag (Aug 8, 2018)

Not a 4x4 but certainly more tasteful than one. It is currently being driven with a registration of 1 KO.


----------



## Leafster (Aug 8, 2018)

Is that Chris Eubanks' motor?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 8, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Not a 4x4 but certainly more tasteful than one. It is currently being driven with a registration of 1 KO.




Chris Eubank.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 8, 2018)

Leafster said:


> Is that Chris Eubanks' motor?



Snaps


----------



## hash tag (Aug 8, 2018)

Yes it is, minus an old parking ticket!


----------



## DownwardDog (Aug 9, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Nice tooling. Always know where you are with a revolver.
> 
> Gun metal grey done proper



Over 50% of the R32 GTRs ever built were in that KH2 "Gun Gray Metallic" colour. It really suits it.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 9, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Nice tooling. Always know where you are with a revolver.
> 
> Gun metal grey done proper



That's not grey, it's light black.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 9, 2018)

I'm seeing more and more cars in this colour, which I can only assume is called 'vending machine latte':

 

Fugly.


----------



## T & P (Aug 10, 2018)

I must say that none of the cars that have been posted since I found an example of the new Audi colour actually match it. The BMW came closest but it’s still a tad lighter in my eyes- and not unattractive.

To those of you who haven’t spotted an Audi in the flesh sporting the colour in question yet, I think when you do will agree this colour is both previously unseen on any car and a bit of an acquired taste at best, or fucking ugly as fuck I tend to see it.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 11, 2018)

T & P said:


> I must say that none of the cars that have been posted since I found an example of the new Audi colour actually match it. The BMW came closest but it’s still a tad lighter in my eyes- and not unattractive.
> 
> To those of you who haven’t spotted an Audi in the flesh sporting the colour in question yet, I think when you do will agree this colour is both previously unseen on any car and a bit of an acquired taste at best, or fucking ugly as fuck I tend to see it.



My brain doesn't process colour when I see an Audi, it's always too busy anticipating (and calculating ways to survive) the inevtiable act of fuckwitted, selfish, absurdly dangerous driving that is about to occur.


----------



## Poi E (Aug 11, 2018)

Really? I always thought they were middle aged man likes to cautiously boot it sort of thing. You see the guys in their R6s wondering if they should floor it or will the bill soak up piano lesson money.


----------



## Poi E (Aug 11, 2018)

R8s drug dealer or chain of budgens boss.


----------



## Dogsauce (Aug 12, 2018)

I saw one of the large rounded muscular Audis at the airport in Porto a couple of weeks ago, finished in an urban camouflage colour scheme. I’d have guessed footballer but it was on Romanian plates. An affront to my eyes.


----------



## mauvais (Aug 12, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Really? I always thought they were middle aged man likes to cautiously boot it sort of thing. You see the guys in their R6s wondering if they should floor it or will the bill soak up piano lesson money.


This is because you apparently live somewhere nice. This is what Audi drivers are like in, say, rural Sussex. Anywhere else and they're 12 years old and driving at 80mph on the pavement. And they've probably got a gun.

Fortunately every once in a while there's a handy sniper on a bridge working in conjunction with other German car brands.


----------



## Poi E (Aug 12, 2018)

I live in Croydon.

Awesome panel gaps on Audis and Skodas too. Best in the business.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Aug 12, 2018)

mauvais said:


> This is because you apparently live somewhere nice. This is what Audi drivers are like in, say, rural Sussex. Anywhere else and they're 12 years old and driving at 80mph on the pavement. And they've probably got a gun.
> 
> Fortunately every once in a while there's a handy sniper on a bridge working in conjunction with other German car brands.


It's a shame Audi didn't make the passenger compartment from the same material they made the engine from. Apparently Audi engines are bulletproof


----------



## hash tag (Aug 12, 2018)




----------



## A380 (Aug 13, 2018)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 143861


----------



## Poi E (Aug 13, 2018)

Don't bother. Just sit and wait for it to catch fire 2018 Land Rover, Range Rover line-up recalled for fire risk | CarAdvice


----------



## dylanredefined (Aug 13, 2018)

Dogsauce said:


> I saw one of the large rounded muscular Audis at the airport in Porto a couple of weeks ago, finished in an urban camouflage colour scheme. I’d have guessed footballer but it was on Romanian plates. An affront to my eyes.



Considering the pattern does work really well at night hope his insurance premium took a hike.





 That does appeal to my inner child.


----------



## High Voltage (Aug 13, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Don't bother. Just sit and wait for it to catch fire 2018 Land Rover, Range Rover line-up recalled for fire risk | CarAdvice



I read



> *2.0-litre Ingenium petrol engine*



As the Ignitium petrol engine


----------



## not-bono-ever (Aug 13, 2018)

dylanredefined said:


> Considering the pattern does work really well at night hope his insurance premium took a hike.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


  What does ? All I can see is a couple of wheels and headlights


----------



## Voley (Aug 17, 2018)

Re the op:

Compelling evidence that the answer is still 'Yes.'


----------



## Poi E (Aug 17, 2018)

Neither. Drive a proper car, you cunt.


----------



## T & P (Aug 17, 2018)

Voley said:


> Re the op:
> 
> Compelling evidence that the answer is still 'Yes.'



I thought he’d got a C, a U, an N and a T?


----------



## ViolentPanda (Aug 18, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> You've not seen the kind of shed that gets sold over here with a chevrolet badge then?
> 
> Their range includes this, the foulest-looking vehicle ever seen on Britain's roads:
> 
> ...



Looks like a Hearse for munchkins.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 19, 2018)

I thought this grey was the preserve of Audi's. Clearly not


----------



## ringo (Aug 21, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> It's "Nardo Grey" which Audi initially did as a colour on the RS3 and it was a sales sensation for them so they made it available on more models. Grey is now so popular that its a premium choice on some models. It's nearly $8k to have it on some models of BMW. The M2 Competition widebody looks _fire_ in grey.
> 
> View attachment 143259


Since reading this thread I have suddenly noticed loads of these. Four on the M2 yesterday, mostly looking meh but the Audi R8 looked alright.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 7, 2018)

I've got a bigger dick than anyone I know and many I don't know, because my name is down for this...


----------



## A380 (Sep 8, 2018)

hash tag said:


> I've got a bigger dick than anyone I know and many I don't know, because my name is down for this...View attachment 146346



I think we all know reality for the owner is more along the lines of:


----------



## hash tag (Sep 8, 2018)




----------



## OzT (Sep 9, 2018)

hash tag said:


> I've got a bigger dick than anyone I know and many I don't know, because my name is down for this...View attachment 146346



Listers, I know them as .. .


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 9, 2018)

My neighbour when I lived in the UK had a Lister XJS. It sounded wonderful but the body kit used to drop off quite regularly.


----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 9, 2018)

OzT said:


> Listers, I know them as .. .



Also produced little narrow gauge petrol locomotives that worked on sewage works railways. I suppose that means the brand has a history of moving turds about.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 9, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> My neighbour when I lived in the UK had a Lister XJS. It sounded wonderful but the body kit used to drop off quite regularly.



Not as extreme but I've noticed BMWs seem to have a real problem with saggy bumpers. Their clip supplier must be pants.


----------



## weltweit (Sep 9, 2018)

dylanredefined said:


> Considering the pattern does work really well at night hope his insurance premium took a hike.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I don't get the concept of camouflage, I can still see it quite clearly !


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 11, 2018)

Someone's pinched Anthony Joshua's £200 grand range rover. My heart bleeds.

Anthony Joshua's £200k Range Rover has been stolen by a very brave thief


----------



## alcopop (Sep 11, 2018)

.


----------



## kebabking (Sep 11, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> Someone's pinched Anthony Joshua's £200 grand range rover. My heart bleeds.
> 
> Anthony Joshua's £200k Range Rover has been stolen by a very brave thief



shit, can you imagine the all encompassing ego of someone who needs their autograph  on their cars headrests?

what a monsterous twat...


----------



## hash tag (Sep 11, 2018)

If you wish to pick a fight with him, well, he's all yours


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 11, 2018)

kebabking said:


> shit, can you imagine the all encompassing ego of someone who needs their autograph  on their cars headrests?
> 
> what a monsterous twat...



It'll be a PR stunt by Land Rover, I doubt Joshua gives a fuck about autographed headrests but if he says what they tell him to say he gets a free car.

That said if you're willing to be a sock puppet for Land Rover, owned by the incredibly dodgy Tata group, then you're a twat.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 12, 2018)

Custom embroidered headrests are a factory option on RRs for which the purchaser will be rinsed for thousands. Most people get the number of the RAC on there.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 12, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Custom embroidered headrests are a factory option on RRs for which the purchaser will be rinsed for thousands. Most people get the number of the RAC on there.



Yes well when the article said Joshua's motor was 'worth' 200,000 what they actually meant was that it would cost 200,000 to anyone stupid enough to buy one. Whether having your name on a headrest is 'worth' what I spend on rent in a year is an open question.

To me, if you can't reliably remember your own name at least 80% of the time, you probably shouldn't be driving; still less driving an armour-plated blunt instrument with a 9 litre engine and a driving position _designed _so that you can't see pedestrians until you've already run them over.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 12, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> Yes well when the article said Joshua's motor was 'worth' 200,000 what they actually meant was that it would cost 200,000 to anyone stupid enough to buy one. Whether having your name on a headrest is 'worth' what I spend on rent in a year is an open question.
> 
> To me, if you can't reliably remember your own name at least 80% of the time, you probably shouldn't be driving; still less driving an armour-plated blunt instrument with a 9 litre engine and a driving position _designed _so that you can't see pedestrians until you've already run them over.



And of course, by personalising your car in this manner you are destroying any resale value. Who's gonna buy a car with some cunt's name scrawled all over it?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 12, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> And of course, by personalising your car in this manner you are destroying any resale value. Who's gonna buy a car with some cunt's name scrawled all over it?



Presmuably the ruffians who stole it are dealing with this very conundrum as we speak.


----------



## kebabking (Sep 12, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> Presmuably the ruffians who stole it are dealing with this very conundrum as we speak.



One hopes that they took the opportunity to have a _celebrity arse wipe. 
_
I'm sure the leather is both soft and exquisitely absorbent...


----------



## Poi E (Sep 12, 2018)

Nope. It'll be the same PU coated shit as the rest.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 13, 2018)

I wish more OEMs did vegan compliant cloth interiors on their high end models. I know somebody with an AMG GT and _everything_ on the inside is covered in leather. You just can't escape the sensation that your riding around in an inside out cow.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 13, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> I wish more OEMs did vegan compliant cloth interiors on their high end models. I know somebody with an AMG GT and _everything_ on the inside is covered in leather. You just can't escape the sensation that your riding around in an inside out cow.



You can get them kitted out in Alcantara if you wish.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 13, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> I wish more OEMs did vegan compliant cloth interiors on their high end models. I know somebody with an AMG GT and _everything_ on the inside is covered in leather. You just can't escape the sensation that your riding around in an inside out cow.



Almost as if the 'people who want a stupidly overpowered cuntmobile but who also have ethical standards' demographic was not a particularly large one.

Leather is a dreadful thing to cover seats with even if you don't care about cows. Like everything else about these fucking ridiculous machines, it's about appearance not experience.


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 13, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> Leather is a dreadful thing to cover seats with even if you don't care about cows.


Don't be a plank, Frank.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Sep 13, 2018)

What on earth is wrong with leather seats? Good ones are lovely.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 13, 2018)

I've never been in one but I've always liked the wool interior of the Toyota Century.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 13, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> I've never been in one but I've always liked the wool interior of the Toyota Century.



Last time I checked, wool was an animal product.


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 13, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> I've never been in one but I've always liked the wool interior of the Toyota Century.


Are vegans allowed wool? 

Stolen from sheep, surely?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 13, 2018)

Spymaster said:


> Are vegans allowed wool?
> 
> Stolen from sheep, surely?



A happy by-product of wool is lamb cutlets


----------



## kebabking (Sep 13, 2018)

I, for one, look forward to scrubbing my children's vommit, dropped food, melted crayons, mud, dog hair and other family accessories out of woollen car seats....


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 13, 2018)

kebabking said:


> I, for one, look forward to scrubbing my children's vommit, dropped food, melted crayons, mud, dog hair and other family accessories out of woollen car seats....


Possibly the most impractical material possible for car seats. Apparently Toyota are now working on Velcro upholstery.


----------



## Griff (Sep 13, 2018)

Makes me think of the wonderful Fiat 130 interior. 70stastic.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 13, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> Leather is a dreadful thing to cover seats with even if you don't care about cows.


Why?


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 13, 2018)

Velour was the poor man's leather in the 80s wasn't it. Drop a fag on it and that was that.


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 13, 2018)

Saul Goodman said:


> Why?


He's talking from his flank, is Frank.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 13, 2018)

Griff said:


> Makes me think of the wonderful Fiat 130 interior. 70stastic.


All it needs is a faux fur dash covering.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 13, 2018)

Spymaster said:


> Velour was the poor man's leather in the 80s wasn't it. Drop a fag on it and that was that.



Try being a teenage hash smoker with nowhere else much to smoke other than in your car. My seats were more hole than seat.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 13, 2018)

Well, they say the bulls  are also used for meat, but I am not convenced https://www.rolls-roycemotorcars.com/en-US/bespoke/the-art-of-leather.htm


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 13, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Last time I checked, wool was an animal product.



And sheep famously die when you shear them 

'kin city folk


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 13, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> And sheep famously die when you shear them
> 
> 'kin city folk


Wool is a by-product of the meat industry, you fucking idiot. 
Here, I hope your wool feels good, you murderer! 
5 Alarming Facts About the Wool Industry


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 13, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> And sheep famously die when you shear them
> 
> 'kin city folk



Oh Frank, I thought you cared for our fluffy friends, man.

What's Wrong With Wool? | PETA



> *Mulesing*
> The world’s largest exporter of wool is Australia, where mulesing is a common practice. This barbaric procedure—in which farmers carve huge chunks of skin and flesh from lambs’ backsides using tools resembling gardening shears in a crude attempt to prevent a parasitic infection called “flystrike”—is typically performed without any painkillers.
> 
> *Shearing*
> ...


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 13, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Oh Frank, I thought you cared for our fluffy friends, man.
> 
> What's Wrong With Wool? | PETA


I think it's known as 'lip service'. Pretending to give a shit about a something so you can feel smug.
But Frank isn't a vegan, is he?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 13, 2018)

Saul Goodman said:


> I think it's known as 'lip service'. Pretending to give a shit about a something so you can feel smug.
> But Frank isn't a vegan, is he?



No, just a veggie. 

Literally worse than Hitler, who was only veggie cos his constitution couldn't handle meat, rather than some Guardianista style bullshit reasoning.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 13, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> No, just a veggie.
> 
> Literally worse than Hitler, who was only veggie cos his constitution couldn't handle meat, rather than some Guardianista style bullshit reasoning.


You know the way you rub a child's head in a patronising way when it says something stupid? I feel like doing that to Frank. I think he thinks sheep are vegetables


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 13, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> And sheep famously die when you shear them


Oh dear 

That was wank, Frank.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 13, 2018)

Spymaster said:


> Oh dear
> 
> That was wank, Frank.


His statement stank. Extremely rank. I think Frank's a crank. Perhaps a plank? On that I'll bank.


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 13, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> A happy by-product of wool is lamb cutlets


and kebabs don't forget kebabs


----------



## twentythreedom (Sep 13, 2018)

Something something vegan wank

ETA damn you mickiQ


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 13, 2018)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> What on earth is wrong with leather seats? Good ones are lovely.


My car has leather seats, first one I've owned that has, As a material it is far superior to anything man-made, comfortable to sit on, invunerable to spilt liquids and super easy to clean.
God's design bureau is a long way ahead of anything humans have come up with yet.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 13, 2018)

But, has it got a CD player.....


----------



## dessiato (Sep 13, 2018)

MickiQ said:


> My car has leather seats, first one I've owned that has, As a material it is far superior to anything man-made, comfortable to sit on, invunerable to spilt liquids and super easy to clean.
> God's design bureau is a long way ahead of anything humans have come up with yet.


Living where I do leather seats are dreadful. They get too hot for comfort. However, suede seats don't have the same extreme problem. But this is offset by the staining/cleaning issues.


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 13, 2018)

hash tag said:


> But, has it got a CD player.....


Yes it has but I've only used it about twice in 12 months since it has an SD slot as well. The last car I had that had a tape deck was an Escort in the mid-90's


----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 13, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Living where I do leather seats are dreadful. They get too hot for comfort. However, suede seats don't have the same extreme problem. But this is offset by the staining/cleaning issues.



That’s because most of them are black. You need tan/cream leather seats in hot climates. Proper class.

(My red leather ones seem to cope with the Iberian summer just fine)


----------



## hash tag (Sep 13, 2018)

Does it look like a jaguar by any chance?

Feeder - Buck Rogers Lyrics | AZLyrics.com


----------



## Poi E (Sep 13, 2018)

Toyota wool is the best. End of argument.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 13, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Living where I do leather seats are dreadful. They get too hot for comfort. However, suede seats don't have the same extreme problem. But this is offset by the staining/cleaning issues.




Staining issues on dessie’s car seats.


----------



## kabbes (Sep 14, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Staining issues on dessie’s car seats.


Fortunately, des is famously non-disaster prone.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 18, 2018)

Startech RR Pickup.







I'm sure it's good for something. I just can't think what.


----------



## kebabking (Sep 18, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Startech RR Pickup.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Well, it's certainly not being a pick-up...

I feel sure however that it will be seen on the streets of London and Cheshire. What superb taste footballers have...


----------



## Poi E (Sep 18, 2018)

What a shit bakkie. No room for a board.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 18, 2018)

it looks like it has a robot form.


----------



## wiskey (Sep 18, 2018)

DotCommunist said:


> it looks like it has a robot form.


Heh that was my first thought too!


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 18, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Startech RR Pickup.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Not a pickup, just a chelsea tractor with part of the roof missing. Also appears to be made of lego.


----------



## dessiato (Sep 18, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Startech RR Pickup.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


The more I look at it the uglier it seems.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 18, 2018)

Mk. 1s look cool when trucked.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Startech RR Pickup.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



It looks like a conversion for people to go shooting in.


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> It looks like a conversion for people to go shooting in.


I don't think it offers much for shooting. Normal 4x4's work fine for that. 

Apparently it's for falconers and golfers ... 



> A new roof spoiler works in concert with the surrounding cargo-bed trim to reduce wind turbulence. This is important when you consider that Startech says "customers from the Arab region like to use the pickup bed also for transporting a securely fastened cage that holds their falcons for the hunt." Presumptuous, considering that this particular subset of customers probably has upfitted AMG 6x6es for this purpose already. But it's nice to know the Startech pickup is literally designed to not ruffle feathers ...
> 
> The tuner also points out that the bed, with its 43 inch loading depth (60 inches with the tailgate dropped) "offers plenty of space for golf or other recreational equipment." Because Lord knows that your clubs are far too constrained in an _enclosed_ Range Rover cargo bay.


The Range Rover pickup you never thought to ask for


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

That this is described a pick up 
This is what a proper pick up looks like


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

If, you really want to go down the range rover pick up route


----------



## dessiato (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> If, you really want to go down the range rover pick up route


Of the two, this I'd consider buying.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

Nah. It has to be the Chevvy, it really has to, it and it's ilk are class.


----------



## kebabking (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Nah. It has to be the Chevvy, it really has to, it and it's ilk are class.



I fear we have very, _very _different definitions of class.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

You really can't beat a classic '40s or 50's pick up


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 18, 2018)

kebabking said:


> I fear we have very, _very _different definitions of class.



Hash has a affliction for really badly built cars.


----------



## kebabking (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> You really can't beat a classic '40s or 50's pick up



don't be ridiculous - watch me pick up a stick, or a hammer...


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Hash has a affliction for really badly built cars.



A stranger at work only today was complimenting me on my Brera, advising me not to get rid of her. He said best car in the yard at work, by far


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> A stranger at work only today was complimenting me on my Brera, advising me not to get rid of her. He said best car in the yard at work, by far



I shudder to think of what the other cars parked up at your work are like.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> A stranger at work only today was complimenting me on my Brera, advising me not to get rid of her. He said best car in the yard at work, by far


Did you give his guide dog a biscuit and a pat on the head?


----------



## kebabking (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> A stranger at work only today was complimenting me on my Brera, advising me not to get rid of her. He said best car in the yard at work, by far



do you work in a scrap yard?


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 18, 2018)

kebabking said:


> don't be ridiculous - watch me pick up a stick, or a hammer...


I loved my Brera. I've thought about getting another one but I wouldn't buy a diesel now and my 3.2 was fun but used even more fuel (around 12-13mpg) than my 928 around town. Plus, the rear seats are no good for anyone with legs so you just end up using them as an extension of the boot and you've effectively got a 2 seater. Still one of the best looking moderns cars on the road though.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 18, 2018)

That mpg! How the fuck do they manage that?


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> I shudder to think of what the other cars parked up at your work are like.



We certainly have the odd Audi and beemer all characterless. Kia's, Hyundai's, Vauxhall's are very common


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

Spymaster said:


> I loved my Brera. I've thought about getting another one but I wouldn't buy a diesel now and my 3.2 was fun but used even more fuel (around 12-13mpg) than my 928 around town. Plus, the rear seats are no good for anyone with legs so you just end up using them as an extension of the boot and you've effectively got a 2 seater. Still one of the best looking moderns cars on the road though.



It is not a taxi, a child carrier, dog transporter, removal van....if you want one of those, get a 159


----------



## Spymaster (Sep 18, 2018)

Poi E said:


> That mpg! How the fuck do they manage that?



The 3.2 Q4 is notorious for it. You can do better if you're ultra careful but I don't reckon I ever got more than about 15 in the city and I could get it down to below 10 if I fucked about.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 18, 2018)

Again, if you want a greener car, get a fiesta or a micra. A brera is not for worrying about such things. It's a look, a style, cool, character, different


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> brera...look...style...cool...character


Like an alcoholic Fiat 500.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 18, 2018)

hash tag said:


> A brera is not for worrying about such things. It's a look, a style, cool, character, different



A ride in the cab of an RAC truck...


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 18, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> A ride in the cab of an RAC truck...


I've worked on many Alfas, and owned a couple of them, and a few Lancias too, including a Delta Integrale, and hand on heart, I can honestly say that Italian cars are the biggest piles of shite that were ever spewed onto the gullible public. The same applies to motorbikes. They may look OK but they're absolute dogshit.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 19, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> I've never been in one but I've always liked the wool interior of the Toyota Century.



Good lord! How many walnut trees died in vain!


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 19, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> No, just a veggie.
> 
> Literally worse than Hitler, who was only veggie cos his constitution couldn't handle meat, rather than some Guardianista style bullshit reasoning.



He wasn't totes veggie, and when he did eat meat, even his dog suffered. "Oh shit, Master has been on the pickled pork knuckle again. ALARM!!!!".


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 19, 2018)

hash tag said:


> It looks like a conversion for people to go shooting up smack in.



FTFY


----------



## kabbes (Sep 19, 2018)

Saul Goodman said:


> I've worked on many Alfas, and owned a couple of them, and a few Lancias too, including a Delta Integrale, and hand on heart, I can honestly say that Italian cars are the biggest piles of shite that were ever spewed onto the gullible public. The same applies to motorbikes. They may look OK but they're absolute dogshit.


10 years of faithful service on harsh roads and off-roads from my Panda 4x4 and it’s still going strong with nothing needed in that time apart from its usual and cheap servicing (except regular fixes to the tyres and brakes thanks to the rutted terrain).  Plus it goes places that leaves the Land Rover drivers scratching their heads. 

That’s one Italian car that looks bloody awful but works a like a charm.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 19, 2018)

ViolentPanda said:


> Good lord! How many walnut trees died in vain!



Have to ask Yamaha, who kindly provided the wood when they weren't designing cool engines.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 19, 2018)

kabbes said:


> 10 years of faithful service on harsh roads and off-roads from my Panda 4x4 and it’s still going strong with nothing needed in that time apart from its usual and cheap servicing (except regular fixes to the tyres and brakes thanks to the rutted terrain).  Plus it goes places that leaves the Land Rover drivers scratching their heads.
> 
> That’s one Italian car that looks bloody awful but works a like a charm.



My FiL used to belong to a gliding club and they had a Panda 4x4 for launching the gliders - it cant be so bad?


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 19, 2018)

Saul Goodman said:


> The same applies to motorbikes. They may look OK but they're absolute dogshit.



Piaggio era Guzzis are good in my experience. Also, blind luck has a lot to do with it. The least reliable bike (4 stroke) I own is my Xerox 999R and the most reliable is my Fila 999R!


----------



## hash tag (Sep 26, 2018)

A brute that comes in grey from the factory. It really should be a bright orange or green or yellow 





2018 Dodge Challenger Widebody - Car Dealerships UK | New & Used Luxury Car Sales


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 26, 2018)

hash tag said:


> A brute that comes in grey from the factory. It really should be a bright orange or green or yellow
> 
> 
> 
> ...



As much as I find your love-in with American metal to be distasteful, I will admit that should I move to a country that drives on the right a Challenger Demon will be my first purchase...


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 26, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> As much as I find your love-in with American metal to be distasteful, I will admit that should I move to a country that drives on the right a Challenger Demon will be my first purchase...
> 
> View attachment 148017



Don't forget to get a tow bar fitted so you can bring a 500 gallon fuel tanker along with you on the 3/4 mile commute from your trailer to the dog fighting shed.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 26, 2018)

No, no, no. It's not like that at all. Because of my, eeerrr, well, "inadequacies", I have  to make up for my shortcomings in other departments, and what better way than with a monster yank tank.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 27, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> As much as I find your love-in with American metal to be distasteful, I will admit that should I move to a country that drives on the right a Challenger Demon will be my first purchase...



The 2019 Hellcats are coming in RHD when it moves to the Alfa Guilia platform. There also some racket that involves buying one from a dealer in LA who will ship it to the Philippines for RHD conversion. 800hp, drag radials and shitty UK roads covered in damp leaves should be an exciting combination.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 27, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> The 2019 Hellcats are coming in RHD when it moves to the Alfa Guilia platform. There also some racket that involves buying one from a dealer in LA who will ship it to the Philippines for RHD conversion. 800hp, drag radials and shitty UK roads covered in damp leaves should be an exciting combination.



Tbf I think one would look out of place on the leafy lanes of Surrey, and as you point out, most likely in the hedges of rural England. Was thinking it would very much suit tearing around the Iberian Penninsula though


----------



## kebabking (Sep 27, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Tbf I think one would look out of place on the leafy lanes of Surrey, and as you point out, most likely in the hedges of rural England. Was thinking it would very much suit tearing around the Iberian Penninsula though



Accidentally knocking over itinerant tramps/major _artistes?_


----------



## hash tag (Sep 27, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Tbf I think one would look out of place on the leafy lanes of Surrey, and as you point out, most likely in the hedges of rural England. Was thinking it would very much suit tearing around the Iberian Penninsula though



Don't forget a top flight football team have their training ground just outside Cobham and a number of their players ex and current live in that area as do a number of celebs. One of the celebs has certainly been
done for driving offences.

BTW I think the hellcat is a step to far.


----------



## rubbershoes (Sep 28, 2018)

At parents evening at my son's new school, I couldn't help but notice one of the other parents  in a Hummer H2

It's a bad vehicle in most situations but particularly ill-suited for the twisty and narrow country lanes round there

#MakeDevonGreatAgain


----------



## hash tag (Sep 28, 2018)

Why not, all those little country lanes, just drive rough shod over everything. Besides, it's nearly bomb proof.


----------



## OzT (Sep 28, 2018)

Maurader, that's the car to go thru things!!!


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 17, 2018)

BMW X7. It's probably a good car but it looks like a Buick from the 90s.






My wife wants one which probably means they've got it right.


----------



## T & P (Oct 17, 2018)

The fugliness of this model ^ is something to behold.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 17, 2018)

I hired something very like that a while ago and hated it. Such an ugly car, so conspicuous.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 17, 2018)

It's like an Audi with pec implants. Ghastly, but then many of BMW's offerings are.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 17, 2018)

I like the look of the Bangle 5 series. Oriental baroque. His 7 series was hideous, though.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 17, 2018)

Poi E said:


> I like the look of the Bangle 5 series. Oriental baroque. His 7 series was hideous, though.



E60 M5 is a cast iron future classic. We'll never see the like of its naturally aspirated 5.0 8,250rpm redline V10 again. The unicorn would be a 6 speed manual estate in one of the BMW Individual colours like Ruby Black.


----------



## Griff (Oct 20, 2018)

Keep seeing those Maserati SUV things. 

I die a little inside each time.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 20, 2018)

Griff said:


> Keep seeing those Maserati SUV things.
> 
> I die a little inside each time.


They're so incredibly ugly, aren't they?


----------



## Griff (Oct 20, 2018)

They are. 







This is what I think when I hear Maserati.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 20, 2018)

Or even this
 
And it's not especially pretty.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 20, 2018)

Considerably less ugly than most modern sports cars, for example this piece of shit:


----------



## Griff (Oct 20, 2018)

Don't think I have any interest at all in modern sportscars.

Mine's getting on a bit at 24 years old, but still love the look of it. 


That's 'modern' to me though.


----------



## Farmer Giles (Oct 20, 2018)

But apparently £79 a day from those Sixt cunts. Yeah right.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 21, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> E60 M5 is a cast iron future classic. We'll never see the like of its naturally aspirated 5.0 8,250rpm redline V10 again. The unicorn would be a 6 speed manual estate in one of the BMW Individual colours like Ruby Black.



Saw one today. Owner was pretty pleased when I cited specs learned from U75  he said he has not had any issues apart from "the usual" but had an engine rebuild when he got it just to be safe.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 21, 2018)

What a great car. My cousin had one between his 2nd and 3rd divorces. We did 160mph in it on the A19 at 3am and missed a nocturnally active JCB by a gnat's bollock hair.

The same monumental engine was in the E63 M6 but that somehow lacks the brawny charm of the E60 M5.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 21, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> What a great car. My cousin had one between his 2nd and 3rd divorces. We did 160mph in it on the A19 at 3am and missed a nocturnally active JCB by a gnat's bollock hair.
> 
> The same monumental engine was in the E63 M6 but that somehow lacks the brawny charm of the E60 M5.


I liked the A19 when it had no speed cameras. I could easily do Edinburgh to Grimsby in 4 hours. Took 6 last summer.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 21, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> My cousin had one between his 2nd and 3rd divorces.



Expensive tastes, your cousin.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 24, 2018)

Range Rovers, no so tuff when it goes toe-to-toe with a bridge


----------



## Poi E (Oct 24, 2018)

They look like large golf carts with the roofs taken off.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 24, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> What a great car. My cousin had one between his 2nd and 3rd divorces.



If this isn't on BMW's marketing it should be. 'The car you need to reel in ex-wife number three'.

After the third divorce it's got to be a Porshe obviously.


----------



## T & P (Oct 24, 2018)

Poi E said:


> They look like large golf carts with the roofs taken off.


Makes sense. Golf is as much of a twat magnet as Range Rovers.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 25, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> If this isn't on BMW's marketing it should be. 'The car you need to reel in ex-wife number three'.
> 
> After the third divorce it's got to be a Porshe obviously.



He has now got four divorces under his belt, is up to his eyes in debt and drives an Audi RS6.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 25, 2018)

SpookyFrank said:


> Considerably less ugly than most modern sports cars, for example this piece of shit:



I drove one of these (GTR hardtop) this morning. Not enough grip and almost too much power but it was a great road car. I can't imagine it would be any good at all on the track.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 25, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> He has now got four divorces under his belt, is up to his eyes in debt and drives an Audi RS6.



One has to maintain appearances don't you know.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 25, 2018)

WOW, stunning (fwiw, there is a rumour that Ms price drove hers into a bush!)


----------



## kebabking (Oct 25, 2018)

hash tag said:


> WOW, stunning (fwiw, there is a rumour that Ms price drove hers into a bush!)



D'you know, I can see Bahnhof Strasse driving exactly that shortly after the lottery win.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 26, 2018)

A bad parked range rover knocks over wall and kills baby....manslaughter?

The Voice star told driver whose runaway car killed daughter will not be charged


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 28, 2018)

Is that even a sentence? What?


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 28, 2018)

New car time for us soon as the Patrol is just too big for urban driving and I don't really need a tow rig any more. I think we're going to get the new X5. It comes with its own Office365 subscription which is a feature I never knew I needed in a car.


----------



## A380 (Oct 30, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> New car time for us soon as the Patrol is just too big for urban driving and I don't really need a tow rig any more. I think we're going to get the new X5. It comes with its own Office365 subscription which is a feature I never knew I needed in a car.


It’s so you can keep a spread sheet to track the number of people you cut up.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 30, 2018)

Or keep track of all the varying gestures coming your way 
Today, did 20 miles, I had 2 wanker signs, 1 v sign and 6 fingers.....


----------



## Sweet FA (Oct 30, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> New car time for us soon as the Patrol is just too big for urban driving and I don't really need a tow rig any more. I think we're going to get the new X5. It comes with its own Office365 subscription which is a feature I never knew I needed in a car.


Mind your mirrors


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 30, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> New car time for us soon as the Patrol is just too big for urban driving and I don't really need a tow rig any more. I think we're going to get the new X5. It comes with its own Office365 subscription which is a feature I never knew I needed in a car.



Gonna get a chrome wrap for it? Will look great under the blazing sun


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 30, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Gonna get a chrome wrap for it? Will look great under the blazing sun



We'll probably get a white one because they hold their value best. I wouldn't mind the plug in hybrid but it's not coming to Australia until the end of 2019.


----------



## kebabking (Oct 31, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> We'll probably get a white one because they hold their value best. I wouldn't mind the plug in hybrid but it's not coming to Australia until the end of 2019.



With Gangster Glass, low profile tyres and a _really _big watch?


----------



## Spymaster (Oct 31, 2018)

White cars need to be in pearlescent or matt paint otherwise they look like police cars.

I'm being seriously tempted by one of these at the moment but buying it would involve breaking several of my own rules regarding car ownership.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 31, 2018)




----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 31, 2018)

kebabking said:


> With Gangster Glass, low profile tyres and a _really _big watch?


 
You are only allowed a combination of 35%/20% VLT tints in Western Australia and the cops are shit hot on it. I already have a Panerai.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 31, 2018)

Spymaster said:


> White cars need to be in pearlescent or matt paint otherwise they look like police cars.
> 
> I'm being seriously tempted by one of these at the moment but buying it would involve breaking several of my own rules regarding car ownership.



I quite like them but the CLS400 is the only rational engine choice and they are very thin on the ground.


----------



## mauvais (Oct 31, 2018)

Spymaster said:


> White cars need to be in pearlescent or matt paint otherwise they look like police cars.
> 
> I'm being seriously tempted by one of these at the moment but buying it would involve breaking several of my own rules regarding car ownership.


The proportions of this are pretty weird. Not their best work.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 31, 2018)

mauvais said:


> The proportions of this are pretty weird. Not their best work.


The C post doesn't work at all.


----------



## mauvais (Oct 31, 2018)

dessiato said:


> The C post doesn't work at all.


D pillar, I think. You're right though. Then the rear axle looks like it needs moving back about a foot before it looks balanced. Then there's that era of Mercedes swage lines or whatever they are that looks like you've had a very neat side impact. Also they called it a 'shooting brake', which it's not.

I often don't really get what Mercedes are up to, design wise. If it weren't for the grille this would be a Vauxhall:






whereas this is definitely a Peugeot or at best DS:


----------



## Spymaster (Oct 31, 2018)

mauvais said:


> The proportions of this are pretty weird. Not their best work.


Yeah, they're a bit marmite. I'm taking Mrs Spy to see it tonight to see if her opinion changes from "that's fucking horrible" when she sees it in the flesh. The interior is possibly the nicest I've ever been in though.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 31, 2018)

Spymaster said:


> Yeah, they're a bit marmite. I'm taking Mrs Spy to see it tonight to see if her opinion changes from "that's fucking horrible" when she sees it in the flesh. The interior is possibly the nicest I've ever been in though.



The interior is very nice, is the boot big enough for a leggy hound? (looking to get a smaller estate for Frau Bahn as she keeps crashing ours, and I want a saloon...)


----------



## Spymaster (Oct 31, 2018)

dessiato said:


> The C post doesn't work at all.


If you mean the back one, that's what I like about it! I love the roof line.


----------



## Spymaster (Oct 31, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> The interior is very nice, is the boot big enough for a leggy hound?


Possibly not standing up.






The sloping rear door makes it more like a hatchback.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 31, 2018)

The legs fold up, but yeah, maybe not quite right for her. Will think again


----------



## kebabking (Oct 31, 2018)

I would like to propose the entry of the Landrover Discovery into this, err... _competition.
_
Today we went to a Big Adventure Day on Exmoor, run by the National Park Authority - lots of stuff for kids: den building, fire lighting, broomstick making, bread making, face painting etc...

Parking is a bit limited so they ask you to squeeze the cars in, unfortunately we had to squeeze next to a Landrover Discovery and it's magnificently fuck-witted owner: instead of getting the kids sorted at the back of the car, and therefore making more room  she insisted on doing it at the sides - doors wide open, kids twatting about, doing elaborate hairstyles and just generally taking up twice as much room as she needed to with her thoughtless and deluded entitlement complex.

She was, dear reader, clad entirely in Joules and Boden.

This entry into 'Twat Factor' was massively reinforced be her actions at the end of the event - it was pissing it down, and the kids were filthy (rightly so, and good fun it was to), she then had a proper fit (to the point of tears) about how much she hates rain and mud (Exmoor, Autumn - anyone?), insisted all the kids take their wellies and coats off before they got in the car (at the sides, again..), and started scrubbing furiously with wet wipes at any speck of mud in the car - still in the pissing rain.

I leave, however, the best till last - like our kids, hers had made witches brooms with sticks and branches and a cable tie. They were having a great time  - but at this stage they were a bit wet, so once the kids had got into the moronic monstrosity (after being made to stand in the pouring rain and take their wet gear off), she looked at the broomsticks, looked at her open boot, looked at the broomsticks again and just closed the boot, leaving her kids fun and achievement behind in the car park so her Chelsea Tractor didn't get any trace of the outside in it.

What a massive, massive cunt.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 31, 2018)

kebabking said:


> I would like to propose the entry of the Landrover Discovery into this, err... _competition.
> _
> Today we went to a Big Adventure Day on Exmoor, run by the National Park Authority - lots of stuff for kids: den building, fire lighting, broomstick making, bread making, face painting etc...
> 
> ...


But that's not the fault of the car.


----------



## kebabking (Oct 31, 2018)

dessiato said:


> But that's not the fault of the car.



It's not the only Disco owner I know who displays such _qualities..._


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 31, 2018)

dessiato said:


> But that's not the fault of the car.



I think you'll fine that the maker of the Disco is Jaguar-Land Rover, so the fact that the owners tend to be arseholes very much is the fault of the car.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 31, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> I think you'll fine that the maker of the Disco is Jaguar-Land Rover, so the fact that the owners tend to be arseholes very much is the fault of the car.


Are you suggesting that if I bought a Jag I'd become an arse hole?


----------



## kebabking (Oct 31, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Are you suggesting that if I bought a Jag I'd become an arse hole?



It's not an absolute, more of a tendency - and I'd venture to say that the Jag brand is the least arsehole-enducing sub-set of the JLR wanker-fest....


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 1, 2018)

dessiato said:


> Are you suggesting that if I bought a Jag I'd become an arse hole?



Tends to be the other way round, arseholes are attracted to the brand, primarily the 4x4 side of things, so you are safer with a Jag, unless you are considering an F-Pace


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 6, 2018)

6x6 Chevy Silverado aka Hennessey Goliath. You know you want one.






It's got 808hp from a stroker L86 so it's probably not even that slow.


----------



## Poi E (Nov 6, 2018)

Flat deck is too high.


----------



## hash tag (Nov 6, 2018)

All is not rosy at JLR, plants shutting for 2 weeks or going down to 3 day weeks........Jaguar Land Rover - BBC News

Ugly, overpriced, too reliant on diesels and to an extent petrol.


----------



## Poi E (Nov 6, 2018)

New Slovakian plant just opened. Wonder if they'll slow that down.

ETA: probably not, as they've just announced Jaguar Land Rover opens engineering centre in Budapest


----------



## ringo (Nov 11, 2018)

"Classy Bitch"


----------



## hash tag (Nov 11, 2018)

That's too old and bland for Katie price


----------



## not-bono-ever (Nov 11, 2018)

ringo said:


> "Classy Bitch"



if that is in that London, it will be virtually unsellable from next year.  Then again, the driver is probabaly ahead of the curve on making it unsellable anywhere.

My big beef with the older LR group output is that, a handful aside, they never actually go anywhere. I dont mean off road, just like fucking anywhere outside a 10 mile radius of their house. Its just shit, wasterful and offensive.


----------



## mauvais (Nov 11, 2018)

It's from 1995 and on about 150,000 miles. They should trailer it back to JLR and claim some sort of prize.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Nov 11, 2018)

The MOT history tells its own story


----------



## Poi E (Nov 12, 2018)

MOT histories are great fun. Watched some recent crashes at the Nordschleife and a car with British plates crashed. Checked his MOT history and he had current advisories for CV joints, steering boots and suspension components. No way I would have tracked a car with that.


----------



## A380 (Nov 13, 2018)

Poi E said:


> MOT histories are great fun. Watched some recent crashes at the Nordschleife and a car with British plates crashed. Checked his MOT history and he had current advisories for CV joints, steering boots and suspension components. No way I would have tracked a car with that.


Perhaps it was a kind of ‘Viking funeral’ thing going on?


----------



## likesfish (Nov 14, 2018)

Thing is the Discovery can be a serious 4x4 and is used by people who need it for more than behaving like a complete dick unlike more SUV


----------



## T & P (Nov 16, 2018)

likesfish said:


> Thing is the Discovery can be a serious 4x4 and is used by people who need it for more than behaving like a complete dick unlike more SUV


Haven’t bothered to compare prices online but I suspect there must be cheaper (and better made) ‘working’ 4x4s for those who actually need them? I’d imagine some Japanese carmakers must be offering superior yet cheaper models...


----------



## likesfish (Nov 16, 2018)

they've  certainly cornered the UN market


----------



## T & P (Nov 16, 2018)

likesfish said:


> they've  certainly cornered the UN market


I guess for people who can’t afford its big brother. Probably doesn’t export as well. Don’t think there’d Be many about in the likes of the UAE or the US. 

According to many in this forum it is actually an unreliable, bad quality piece of junk as well. Not sure if it’d be actually that bad, perhaps there is an element of snobbery at play.


----------



## kebabking (Nov 16, 2018)

T & P said:


> I guess for people who can’t afford its big brother. Probably doesn’t export as well. Don’t think there’d Be many about in the likes of the UAE or the US.
> 
> According to many in this forum it is actually an unreliable, bad quality piece of junk as well. Not sure if it’d be actually that bad, perhaps there is an element of snobbery at play.



To some extent yes, but they are wildly over-priced and less reliable than their competitors, things like the Mitsubishi Shogun, Nissan Pathfinder etc...

I see more Range Rovers and Landrovers on the back of recovery trucks than I see any other brand - by a huge margin.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Nov 16, 2018)

likesfish said:


> they've  certainly cornered the UN market



I know plenty of UN badged white landcruisers lasting a matter of days before being pinched and replated for use by local bad boys. sometimes not even replated. I cannot conceive of a local bad boy who would want to cruise the potholed mortared tracks of his home town in a LR product that sheds a significant percentage of its own bodyweight everytime it is driven.


----------



## rubbershoes (Nov 16, 2018)

likesfish said:


> they've  certainly cornered the UN market



Toyota hilux have cornered the Al Shabaab market


----------



## not-bono-ever (Nov 16, 2018)

I cannot imagine the outcome if some local AQ franchise decided to nail a 50 cal to the back of a LR product and start an insurrection. fucking hell

eta- i think costas/ callan had the idea of doing this in Angola to form a fast moving hit group to halt the dastardly commies. that didnt end well


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 17, 2018)

I've owned a Range Rover and I've owned a Hilux. I know which one I'd choose to do jihad in and it's not the one made in the midlands.


----------



## likesfish (Nov 17, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> I know plenty of UN badged white landcruisers lasting a matter of days before being pinched and replated for use by local bad boys. sometimes not even replated. I cannot conceive of a local bad boy who would want to cruise the potholed mortared tracks of his home town in a LR product that sheds a significant percentage of its own bodyweight everytime it is driven.



my regiment kept itself in beers and smokes "recovering" 4x4s taken from the UN and media in Bosnia as a 30mm cannon and a chaingun and chobham armour beat aks and a machine gun


----------



## rubbershoes (Nov 17, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> I've owned a Range Rover and I've owned a Hilux. I know which one I'd choose to do jihad in and it's not the one made in the midlands.



Range Rovers may come with champagne flutes but there's nowhere to fit a GPMG


----------



## kebabking (Nov 17, 2018)

rubbershoes said:


> Range Rovers may come with champagne flutes but there's nowhere to fit a GPMG



Actually I saw one in Bosnia in 94/95 - they had taken the roof and door off of the boot compartment, welded a cage frame into place and put a DShKM mount onto the cage.

It had been sprayed a remarkably visible dark bottle green - and I think the bloke in the back had died of hypothermia about a week previously.


----------



## rubbershoes (Nov 17, 2018)

kebabking said:


> Actually I saw one in Bosnia in 94/95 - they had taken the roof and door off of the boot compartment, welded a cage frame into place and put a DShKM mount onto the cage.



That's going to play havoc with your fuel consumption


----------



## Poi E (Nov 17, 2018)

kebabking said:


> Actually I saw one in Bosnia in 94/95 - they had taken the roof and door off of the boot compartment, welded a cage frame into place and put a DShKM mount onto the cage.
> 
> It had been sprayed a remarkably visible dark bottle green - and I think the bloke in the back had died of hypothermia about a week previously.



ABiH? Guessing the VRS didn't need to cobble such things together.


----------



## BigTom (Nov 18, 2018)

Toyota Prius obviously the vehicle of choice for your discerning eco-terrorist freedom fighter



Suddenly a Land Rover seems like a sensible choice of vehicle.


----------



## Cheesepig3 (Dec 8, 2018)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> If I could afford a Range Rover I'd buy it. A proper one though, not the sport.




Exactly. 


A proper one with proper tyres, so that when you're driving to do maintenance on a wind turbine up a Scottish mountain,  in the snow, you don't get stuck.


HAHAHAAAHAHA!!! THAT'S  how you curdle a metropolitan green boring droning smug fucker's brain when they get all snooty about your Rangie. Hah! You think I'm going up Millennium Mountain on a fucking bike? In January?


And no it's not a sport.


----------



## kebabking (Dec 9, 2018)

I saw three broken down Discovery's yesterday - I only drove from Worcester to Stratford and back....


----------



## Cheesepig3 (Dec 9, 2018)

kebabking said:


> I saw three broken down Discovery's yesterday - I only drove from Worcester to Stratford and back....



They need nurturing. 


In fact, they need to be a co-signatory on your bank account.


----------



## Smick (Dec 9, 2018)

not-bono-ever said:


> if that is in that London, it will be virtually unsellable from next year.  Then again, the driver is probabaly ahead of the curve on making it unsellable anywhere.
> 
> My big beef with the older LR group output is that, a handful aside, they never actually go anywhere. I dont mean off road, just like fucking anywhere outside a 10 mile radius of their house. Its just shit, wasterful and offensive.


I know that car! It used to be parked in a disabled spot up behind the cinema in Streatham. 

Interestingly, it has recently been sold. It used to have a number plate which ended 81TCH. Last time I went past the pink RR was gone. 

The photo must be under the new ownership with the new nimberplate.


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 9, 2018)

Who wants a "1,000hp" electric 4x4 assembled by children in India?


----------



## T & P (Dec 11, 2018)




----------



## High Voltage (Dec 11, 2018)

But it's a THOUSAND BRAKE HORSEPOWER - What's not to like . . . apart from the colour, and I quite like green cars


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 11, 2018)

I had a women yesterday at my humble Xmas tree stall. The price of the trees were obviously an issue for her, so I spent some time finding a full 4 foot instead of the 5 foot she was thinking about. Offered to help carry it to her. 

Which was a fucking Range Rover and probably worth more then I'll earn this year.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 11, 2018)

High Voltage said:


> But it's a THOUSAND BRAKE HORSEPOWER - What's not to like . . . apart from the colour, and I quite like green cars



Its for all your off road adventures. Provided you don't stray to far from a plug socket.


----------



## High Voltage (Dec 11, 2018)

But it's a THOUSAND BRAKE HORSEPOWER - who cares where the plug socket is


----------



## Poi E (Dec 11, 2018)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> I had a women yesterday at my humble Xmas tree stall. The price of the trees were obviously an issue for her, so I spent some time finding a full 4 foot instead of the 5 foot she was thinking about. Offered to help carry it to her.
> 
> Which was a fucking Range Rover and probably worth more then I'll earn this year.



Knocked you down on price and got you to carry it. My esteem for RR drivers has increased.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 11, 2018)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> I had a women yesterday at my humble Xmas tree stall. The price of the trees were obviously an issue for her, so I spent some time finding a full 4 foot instead of the 5 foot she was thinking about. Offered to help carry it to her.
> 
> Which was a fucking Range Rover and probably worth more then I'll earn this year.


I've always found new money behaves this way. They have got wealthy by being over cautious with every penny. Old money just doesn't spend it in the first place, but if they must have something they'll pay.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 11, 2018)

Poi E said:


> Knocked you down on price and got you to carry it. My esteem for RR drivers has increased.



First against the wall tbh


----------



## OzT (Dec 12, 2018)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> First against the wall tbh



Only if she's attractive


----------



## hash tag (Dec 13, 2018)

Why against a wall if they have a rr, what's wrong with the inside. The seats recline surely?


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 18, 2018)

6x6 Mercedes X-Class conversion. Those Potenzas will be great off road.


----------



## Poi E (Dec 18, 2018)

Nearly a fascist estate.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 18, 2018)

Problem with its capability?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 18, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> 6x6 Mercedes X-Class conversion. Those Potenzas will be great off road.
> 
> View attachment 155952



I really like that.

OK, maybe not in a twee Surrey Hills village, but it has it's place. Shoreham cement works or somewhere like that


----------



## hash tag (Dec 18, 2018)

Katie Price charged with drink-driving after pink Range Rover crash

"Her pink Range Rover was found in a bush"


----------



## Poi E (Dec 18, 2018)

Some mistake, surely?


----------



## dessiato (Dec 18, 2018)

We've all parked a car or two in a bush, haven't we? I certainly have. Well to be strictly accurate one was a hedge, the other was a ditch. Another time was a stone wall.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 18, 2018)

Not quite like that, no, actually. If you twist the words around a bit, then you might be talking


----------



## Smick (Dec 18, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> 6x6 Mercedes X-Class conversion. Those Potenzas will be great off road.
> 
> View attachment 155952



Interesting how the X Class is just a Nissan Navara with a three pointed star on the front, but nobody has ever thought to 6x6ify a Navara.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 18, 2018)

Smick said:


> Interesting how the X Class is just a Nissan Navara with a three pointed star on the front, but nobody has ever thought to 6x6ify a Navara.


It’s almost as if people with vast amounts of money are also often compete fucking twats.


----------



## plurker (Dec 18, 2018)

Smick said:


> I know that car! It used to be parked in a disabled spot up behind the cinema in Streatham.
> 
> Interestingly, it has recently been sold. It used to have a number plate which ended 81TCH. Last time I went past the pink RR was gone.
> 
> The photo must be under the new ownership with the new nimberplate.



The one in Streatham is still about.

Either M3ITCH or M331 TCH or similar, spaced as ME BITCH The owner had cancer of some kind and was in remission - think she used to fundraise using the car or something. I recall it being in the local media for something a while back...

So sad to think there are two pink RRs about


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 19, 2018)

hash tag said:


> Problem with its capability?



That's a G-Wagen the black 6x6 monstrosity is an X Class.


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 19, 2018)

Smick said:


> Interesting how the X Class is just a Nissan Navara with a three pointed star on the front, but nobody has ever thought to 6x6ify a Navara.



Sure they do.


----------



## Smick (Dec 19, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> That's a G-Wagen the black 6x6 monstrosity is an X Class.


I think a G-Wagen is maybe worth putting the effort into. Not a rebadged Nissan. G-Wagens are cool.


----------



## Smick (Dec 19, 2018)

DownwardDog said:


> Sure they do.
> 
> View attachment 156041


I stand corrected!


----------



## Smick (Dec 19, 2018)

plurker said:


> The one in Streatham is still about.
> 
> Either M3ITCH or M331 TCH or similar, spaced as ME BITCH The owner had cancer of some kind and was in remission - think she used to fundraise using the car or something. I recall it being in the local media for something a while back...
> 
> So sad to think there are two pink RRs about


Surely that one in the thread must be the Streatham one with a different number plate. Two people couldn’t both put the bitch stickers on different pink Range Rovers. 

I’m wondering what sort of fundraising she does. Her friends donate enough money and she promises to take the bus when she comes to see them.


----------



## A380 (Dec 22, 2018)




----------



## Poi E (Dec 22, 2018)

checked and £7.99 online. Brilliant


----------



## Saul Goodman (Dec 30, 2018)

I was looking at this thread earlier, then decided to go on Facebook to see what I'd missed over the last year, and I was greeted with this.






Coincidence? 

I've never searched for anything or visited anywhere to do with Range Rovers, except this page.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 31, 2018)

Saul Goodman said:


> I was looking at this thread earlier, then decided to go on Facebook to see what I'd missed over the last year, and I was greeted with this.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Facebook clearly thinks you’re a cunt.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Dec 31, 2018)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Facebook clearly thinks you’re a cunt.


See!!! Even Facebook knows me, and I never go on there!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 5, 2019)

Beep beep!


----------



## Leafster (Jan 13, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> Who wants a "1,000hp" electric 4x4 assembled by children in India?
> 
> View attachment 155121


Fully Charged have done a video on it and its "truck" variant. It's not all bad but still ugly as fuck.


----------



## Poi E (Jan 17, 2019)

In HRH RR

Prince Philip unhurt in crash while driving


----------



## Pickman's model (Jan 17, 2019)

Poi E said:


> In HRH RR
> 
> Prince Philip unhurt in crash while driving


Yeh bloody bad news


----------



## Poi E (Jan 17, 2019)

Yeah cheers for the link


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 17, 2019)

Ford Ranger/Nissan Navara type things seem to be growing in popularity in the arsehole community. Particularly popular on terraced streets where one of the damn things takes up the width of two entire houses.

I assume the target market for these is people who bought a big 4x4, then realised they were still beset by a crippling and entirely justified sense of inadequacy and decided that the only solution was to buy something bigger.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 17, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Ford Ranger/Nissan Navara type things seem to be growing in popularity in the arsehole community. Particularly popular on terraced streets where one of the damn things takes up the width of two entire houses.
> 
> I assume the target market for these is people who bought a big 4x4, then realised they were still beset by a crippling and entirely justified sense of inadequacy and decided that the only solution was to buy something bigger.



Actually, it's financial - though twattery undoubtedly comes into it - you don't pay VAT on them, so they are instantly 20% cheaper. They tend to be a little more agricultural and less refined on the road than the more traditional chelsea tractors, and thus cheaper in terms of build - put the two together and you're looking at something that's half the price of a Discovery.

They are also cheaper to insure - less likely to be targeted for theft-export.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 18, 2019)

It's official, grey is the new black 
BBC News - Grey is the UK's favourite car colour for the first time
Grey is the new black for car buyers

I'm bang on trend


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 18, 2019)

hash tag said:


> It's official, grey is the new black
> BBC News - Grey is the UK's favourite car colour for the first time
> Grey is the new black for car buyers
> 
> I'm bang on trend



Most car makers now offer grey, a different kind of grey, shiny grey, white, black or red. I don't know what these people have against colours but I think it's a bit much to call grey the UK's favourite colour when we're offered little else.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 18, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Most car makers now offer grey, a different kind of grey, shiny grey, white, black or red. I don't know what these people have against colours but I think it's a bit much to call grey the UK's favourite colour when we're offered little else.




tbf Orange is the up and coming colour, which is odd as it looks terrible on anything other than a 911.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 18, 2019)

Really? Think again


----------



## hash tag (Jan 18, 2019)

not getting this one


----------



## dessiato (Jan 18, 2019)

Proof of the pudding?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 18, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Really? Think again





hash tag said:


> not getting this one



Thanks for proving my point so succinctly.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 18, 2019)

kebabking said:


> Actually, it's financial - though twattery undoubtedly comes into it - you don't pay VAT on them, so they are instantly 20% cheaper. They tend to be a little more agricultural and less refined on the road than the more traditional chelsea tractors, and thus cheaper in terms of build - put the two together and you're looking at something that's half the price of a Discovery.
> 
> They are also cheaper to insure - less likely to be targeted for theft-export.



Why are they VAT exempt? They're clearly not commercial vehicles, legitimate tradespeople drive vans.

Never seen a Ford Ranger with commercial livery or even the traditional coating of grime found on the vehicles of those who do actual stuff for a living.

I did see some gangsters, or people who seemed to think they were gangsters, pull up in a matching pair of metallic orange Rangers. The head bloke had a purple suit on and was clearly not on his way to work at a breakers yard. I told them off for parking their twat wagons so as to prevent wheelchair acces to the pavement and boss man tried to threaten me but he was wearing a fucking purple suit so it wasn't very scary at all.


----------



## Leafster (Jan 18, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Why are they VAT exempt? They're clearly not commercial vehicles, legitimate tradespeople drive vans.


Many crewcab/double cab pickups are treated as commercial vehicles for VAT purposes (there's a full list of criteria which I can't remember at the moment) so if you're a VAT registered trader you can reclaim the VAT on them.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 18, 2019)

buying a forest has both tax and inheritance benefits - massively so - do it properly &  make a token business of it and you get the justification for a vat free slab of metal - them forests and woods are not there to make the countryside pretty.


----------



## Poi E (Jan 19, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Most car makers now offer grey, a different kind of grey, shiny grey, white, black or red. I don't know what these people have against colours but I think it's a bit much to call grey the UK's favourite colour when we're offered little else.



First thing I noticed moving to the UK was silver and grey cars everywhere. Just assumed people were afraid of colour.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 19, 2019)

Well spotted with the grey cars, maybe it is true...


hash tag said:


> It's official, grey is the new black
> BBC News - Grey is the UK's favourite car colour for the first time
> Grey is the new black for car buyers
> 
> I'm bang on trend





Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Thanks for proving my point so succinctly.



Even the Audi?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 20, 2019)

..


----------



## hash tag (Jan 24, 2019)

How's this for a hot one?


----------



## hash tag (Jan 26, 2019)

Dear Mr Strasse (Bahnhof Strasse ), a nod to the superb and glorious heritage that is Alfa. Check out the auction, article Classic & Sports Car
Particularlyvitems 11&12. 29 stunning classics for sale at the Paris auctions | Classic & Sports Car


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 26, 2019)

Alfa's look great and are supposedly great driver's cars, my next car may well be one. But anything older than the Giulia will spend more time on the back of a low loader than tearing around the b roads.

And all classic cars are awful.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 26, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Alfa's look great and are supposedly great driver's cars, my next car may well be one. But anything older than the Giulia will spend more time on the back of a low loader than tearing around the b roads.
> 
> And all classic cars are awful.



Landrovers and Range Rovers are the same: they are great cars, there's nothing on the market that has the off-road capability matched with the on-road sharpness and comfort of them - its just that they are terrifyingly unreliable and JLR dealers have an appalling reputation for taking forever and costing a fortune to fix anything, and the warranty seems to never apply to anything. one of our neighbours bought a brand new Disco last year - the central lovcking went mental after 3 weeks to the point where it had to be lobbed on a low-loader and dragged off to have the lot replaced. it took _two months_, and JLR were obnoxious the whole time, and only the involvement of trading standards forced them to accept that it was a manufacturing fault for which they were liable.

this was a fifty _thousand_ pound car that was less than 6 months old.

i wouldn't touch them with a 60ft, burning bargepole.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 26, 2019)

That sounds very much like when they denied any liability for my engine exploding. Eventually got them on Watchdog, but too late to help me. 

I'll stick to German or Japanese ta. Although the fast Giulia is singing to me, I hear it eats tyres, it's like a mermaid luring me...


----------



## mauvais (Jan 26, 2019)

Anything of that ilk eats tyres. The QV needs to get off Corsas or whatever it is that comes with it though.

I know a fair bit second hand about them. A mate whose car history is RS6, M5, C63 and what was at the time the world's fastest A45 went to the QV, loves it and is probably going to break with a habit and keep it beyond the usual two years. Then again, lots of people had fairly big problems. I think on balance it's working out OK, comparable with anything else.


----------



## mauvais (Jan 26, 2019)

Also:


----------



## pogofish (Jan 26, 2019)

Sign outside pub today - "Please do not park in the beer garden... etc"

So, parked in Beer Garden - One Range Rover Sport and a Freelander.


----------



## ska invita (Jan 26, 2019)

Poi E said:


> First thing I noticed moving to the UK was silver and grey cars everywhere. Just assumed people were afraid of colour.


Welcome to little Britain
Notorious 'ugly' yellow car vandalised


----------



## Poi E (Jan 27, 2019)

Mental. The only livening up another dirty brown and grey tumble down village.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 1, 2019)

I don't quite know how to hide my disapointment Land Rover pulls plug on £240,000 Range Rover SV Coupe


----------



## Chilli.s (Feb 2, 2019)

hash tag said:


> I don't quite know how to hide my disapointment Land Rover pulls plug on £240,000 Range Rover SV Coupe


Such a shame, I was saving up for one of those as well, since 1975.


----------



## dessiato (Feb 2, 2019)

hash tag said:


> I don't quite know how to hide my disapointment Land Rover pulls plug on £240,000 Range Rover SV Coupe


If I'd had the money I'd have bought one. I like its looks. I'll bet it would have been a lot of fun off road.


----------



## mauvais (Feb 2, 2019)

Even for JLR that thing was lazy wank. And it's no more a 'coupe' than this is:


----------



## A380 (Feb 2, 2019)

rather than the above: Back in the 80s a friend had a van made with XR3 parts. Couldn't find a picture put did turn this up which looks great if you needed a small van...


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 3, 2019)

This Kangoo with a Megane RS drivetrain is great.



Urban pearl clutchers look away. _He breaks the speed limit. In a built up area._


----------



## dessiato (Feb 3, 2019)

I like sleepers. There's something rather fun in the idea of a knackered old rat look and massive performance. This, however, looks fun.


----------



## mauvais (Feb 3, 2019)

That's Assetto Corsa.

Goodwood have got an interesting Transit:


----------



## dessiato (Feb 3, 2019)

mauvais said:


> That's Assetto Corsa.
> 
> Goodwood have got an interesting Transit:



Is that the one with the XJ220 engine?


----------



## mauvais (Feb 3, 2019)

dessiato said:


> Is that the one with the XJ220 engine?


Yep.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 3, 2019)

"Sleepers" thats a new one on me. This was an early one. Guy gets a knackered old minor of his mum. Guy adds to it and adds to it and...


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 3, 2019)

A "sleeper" has to look like an unmodified car. That Moggie fails the test!

This 2JZ-GTE engined Volvo is a fine example of the breed.


----------



## dessiato (Feb 3, 2019)

According to some in the Bertone owners club the SAAB 2.0 turbo or the Vectra V6 are good performance swaps for the G. I fancy the V6 with 6 speed swap. And of course I'd keep the body as standard as possible.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 3, 2019)

The minor did start that way. The mechanics were seriously modded until he started on the body


----------



## sleaterkinney (Feb 15, 2019)

Saw one of these in Clapham earlier today, a convertible evoque


----------



## Poi E (Feb 16, 2019)




----------



## T & P (Feb 16, 2019)

sleaterkinney said:


> Saw one of these in Clapham earlier today, a convertible evoque



One roll over in one of those and your head would be found couple of hundred yards away from your body.


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 16, 2019)

T & P said:


> One roll over in one of those and your head would be found couple of hundred yards away from your body.



It has rollover protection bars that are supposed to deploy 90ms. However, as they were designed and built by JLR I wouldn't count on it.


----------



## T & P (Feb 16, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> It has rollover protection bars that are supposed to deploy 90ms. However, as they were designed and built by JLR I wouldn't count on it.


I can also imagine all kind of horrible accidents whereby the fast-deploying rollover bars get entangled in the occupants' long hair/scarf/hoodie as they shoot up, and take their heads clean off.


----------



## Poi E (Feb 17, 2019)

Must ask an acquaintance in the traffic police about these things. Frequent attender of rolled SUVs.


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 17, 2019)

My daughter I ride sometimes ride our motocross bikes here:






So I've seen loads of rolled 4x4s. FJ Cruisers roll really well but a VW Tiguan that had a slow speed roll looked like it had been hit by a Paveway.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Feb 17, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> My daughter I ride sometimes ride our motocross bikes here:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Looks like a lovely spot, and no doubt vastly improved by the soul-rending tortured-metal squeal of a couple of dirt bike engines.


----------



## kebabking (Feb 17, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Looks like a lovely spot, and no doubt vastly improved by the soul-rending tortured-metal squeal of a couple of dirt bike engines.



Better than listening to the uncooth noise of Australians....


----------



## Poi E (Feb 17, 2019)




----------



## BigTom (Feb 21, 2019)

Looks like BMW are making a move to reclaim their _king of the dicks_ car crown from the more recent pretenders:



BMW scores zero in US pedestrian safety testing. From what I understand in the video these are tests for vehicles with pedestrian collision systems, testing how well they work to stop the car automatically. Most of the cars do a good job tbf.

2minute video with more info in the link here: 
New ratings address pedestrian crashes


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 25, 2019)

'Smelly nappy' car speeding at 118mph



> A car with two young children inside has been stopped by police after travelling at more than 100mph due to a "smelly nappy".
> 
> The Range Rover was stopped on the M180 near Wrawby, North Lincolnshire after speeding at up to 118mph, Humberside Police said.
> 
> ...


----------



## kebabking (Feb 25, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> 'Smelly nappy' car speeding at 118mph



Full of shit?


----------



## hash tag (Feb 25, 2019)

Car or nappy?


----------



## kebabking (Feb 28, 2019)

Reasons not to buy a Land Rover, #785219.

There's a new fleet wife fault - the integrated phone/entertainment system has started to make a tap-tap-tap noise even when it's all switched off. It is, according to my fuckwit neighbour who has bought one of these piles of shit, so massively distracting that he can't drive the thing.

JLR says that it will be a month before they can fixed it with a software patch.

Ho fucking ho I thought, as I climbed into my Nissan Pathfinder, _sans _tapping noise and appalling service....


----------



## hash tag (Feb 28, 2019)

Was it Eddie Stobart who was shown on the box buying a new motor and told the dealer to stop all the bleeps: sorry, not possible. So he took it to some jack the lad who did it in minutes.


----------



## kabbes (Feb 28, 2019)

Talking of JLR — my friend has a Jag estate.  It has a special button on the inside I’d the boot lid to make it shut without having to pull the boot down.  Do you think that or any of its other fancy electronics has ever worked properly?  Has it fuck.  That car is forever going back the the JLR mechanics who scratch their heads and do nothing to fix it.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 28, 2019)

kebabking said:


> Reasons not to buy a Land Rover, #785219.
> 
> There's a new fleet wife fault - the integrated phone/entertainment system has started to make a tap-tap-tap noise even when it's all switched off. It is, according to my fuckwit neighbour who has bought one of these piles of shit, so massively distracting that he can't drive the thing.
> 
> ...




For fifty quid a day I'll come and sit in your passenger seat drumming my fingers across your dashboard, for that authentic Land Rover Experience.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 28, 2019)

Far to cheap to be considered.


----------



## dessiato (Feb 28, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Far to cheap to be considered.


I'll do it for only £150 per day, plus expenses of course. I'll do it at this very low promotional rate for the first month, after that the price will increase. 

To take advantage of this limited time offer please send full details of your bank account. Please include account number, branch identifier, and all PIN associated with the account.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 28, 2019)

PS. My memorable name is Harrow


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 28, 2019)

dessiato said:


> I'll do it for only £150 per day, plus expenses of course. I'll do it at this very low promotional rate for the first month, after that the price will increase.
> 
> To take advantage of this limited time offer please send full details of your bank account. Please include account number, branch identifier, and all PIN associated with the account.



You'd be doubly good at it, as just like a genuine JLR part, you'll break pretty soon.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Feb 28, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> 'Smelly nappy' car speeding at 118mph



Almost as if making cars that go at double the speed limit and then marketing them to utter helmets was a shit idea or something.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Mar 1, 2019)

Sheikh builds ridiculous 10-wheel hybrid truck out of Jeep Wrangler and giant military vehicle

Apologies for the scum link. But I think it’s now safe to say this thread is closed


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 1, 2019)

Perfect for nipping around Knightsbridge


----------



## hash tag (Mar 1, 2019)

I'm sure I saw someone in Thunderbird's driving something like that. Was it the hood?


----------



## hash tag (Mar 1, 2019)

If you go rally crossing or swamp racing or something, I get single use vehicle. With that thing I don't quite get what the single Use is


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Mar 1, 2019)

hash tag said:


> If you go rally crossing or swamp racing or something, I get single use vehicle. With that thing I don't quite get what the single Use is


It’s purpose is to show you that the owner has lots of money and doesn’t give a fuck about you.


----------



## weltweit (Mar 1, 2019)

Someone showed me a video of the latest Evoque, I got bored of all the toys. 
£50k apparently, good luck to them. 
I can't imagine spending that kind of money on a car.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 1, 2019)

Could have simply got a gaudy range rover to do that in


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 1, 2019)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> It’s purpose is to show you that the owner has lots of money and doesn’t give a fuck about you.



And it does its job excellently!


----------



## hash tag (Mar 14, 2019)

Range Rovers recalled https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-47564225


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Mar 14, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Range Rovers recalled https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-47564225



Will emissions really bother the owners of such beasts?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 14, 2019)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> Will emissions really bother the owners of such beasts?



I doubt it. I also doubt JLR has the capacity to repair 40,000 cars when they struggle to fix one.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 14, 2019)




----------



## T & P (Mar 14, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> View attachment 164457


Hah! A standard Range Rover wouldn’t have gone in, but the extra wankiness shape of the Evoque allowed it to fit like a glove. Good luck getting it out without totalling it 

PS That is definitely somewhere in Chelsea or possibly Kensington- very common design, traditionally self-contained accommodation for ‘the help’. I saw another car nearly pull the same trick once.


----------



## Poi E (Mar 14, 2019)

Park Assist Failure - Range Rover Evoque Forums


----------



## kabbes (Mar 16, 2019)

All hail the JLR electronics.

Still, I’m sure that 90ns rollbar deployment will be just fine.


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 16, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> View attachment 164457


Convenient off-road parking.


----------



## mauvais (Mar 16, 2019)

T & P said:


> PS That is definitely somewhere in Chelsea or possibly Kensington- very common design, traditionally self-contained accommodation for ‘the help’.


What, in the Evoque?


----------



## hash tag (Apr 16, 2019)

And all because....
Discover our bespoke Land Rover Defender | Events |


----------



## kebabking (Apr 16, 2019)

hash tag said:


> And all because....
> Discover our bespoke Land Rover Defender | Events |



quality.

do you think they'll install an RAC van parked up behind it?


----------



## hash tag (Apr 16, 2019)

Only if someone buys one


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 16, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> My daughter I ride sometimes


----------



## A380 (Apr 18, 2019)




----------



## hash tag (Apr 23, 2019)

A little something for the mean streets......of Kensington


----------



## T & P (Apr 23, 2019)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 168790 A little something for the mean streets......of Kensington


If I saw that and had pen and paper at hand I swear I’d leave a note on the windscreen reading ‘Sorry about your penis’.


----------



## dylanredefined (Apr 23, 2019)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 168790 A little something for the mean streets......of Kensington



My inner 10year old loves it.  Though utterly impractical. It has those 3little words 
"6 wheel drive!"


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 24, 2019)

Aurumania - Bicycles, Reviews, Comparison, Helpful Resource & News
</thread>


----------



## dylanredefined (Apr 25, 2019)

Saul Goodman said:


> Aurumania - Bicycles, Reviews, Comparison, Helpful Resource & News
> </thread>


 No brakes ,bell or reflectors. Where exactly are you going to ride it? At least a super car impresses people.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 25, 2019)

Supercars impress some people, not all.


----------



## A380 (Apr 25, 2019)

Saul Goodman said:


> Aurumania - Bicycles, Reviews, Comparison, Helpful Resource & News
> </thread>


At least my Raleigh Grifter had brakes and gears...


----------



## hash tag (Apr 25, 2019)

If you want to go down the bike route, here's a stylish little number, for someone of good height and relatively fit....It's long, heavy, no gears, no brakes and for someone
who is not shy of a little attention 


hash tag said:


> I see there are a few speed machines above. For something a little different, I give you my cruiser, a GT Dynatec
> 
> View attachment 45709


----------



## hash tag (Apr 25, 2019)

I know it's not a range thing, but made me laugh. " Christopher, who is passionate about cars, drives a Volkswagen Passat which he has lowered." 



hash tag said:


> I'm sorry, but I had a wry smile over this Limerick motorist can’t drive into his village  due to speed ramps


Another article says he now has to drive an extra 600 miles a month to get to work and back


----------



## DownwardDog (Apr 26, 2019)

hash tag said:


> I know it's not a range thing, but made me laugh. " Christopher, who is passionate about cars, drives a Volkswagen Passat which he has lowered."



Passats, like all VeeDubs, are very popular in the stance scene.


----------



## teuchter (Apr 27, 2019)

On Shit London today


----------



## kabbes (Apr 28, 2019)

teuchter said:


> On Shit London today
> 
> View attachment 169125


Cook pass babtridge


----------



## Poi E (Apr 28, 2019)

And the owner comes out and says "thank fuck I got that wrap done".


----------



## hash tag (Apr 29, 2019)

Instagram star's Porsche vandalised weeks after Lamborghini went up in flames


----------



## Dogsauce (Apr 29, 2019)

“The car he worked so hard to buy” lol.

Bet he sweated his arse off for it, I’m sure.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 10, 2019)

Tata are desperate to dump JLR and PSA are lining themselves up to be saddled with a lifetime of warranty claims and image problems. Even the Chinese consumer is tiring of ropey motoring and niggling electrical problems


----------



## hash tag (May 10, 2019)

Wasn't uber or some other cab firm interested in JLR?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 14, 2019)

Driver 'thought she was only going 110mph'

A motorist who was caught driving at up 115mph on a motorway told police she "thought she was only going 110mph".

Lancashire Road Police stopped a Range Rover which had been "driving well in excess of the speed limit" on the M55 eastbound just before 12:00 BST on Monday.

A force spokesman said her "excuse" for going so fast was that she was "going to pick up a new puppy".

He added that she had been "reported for the offence".


----------



## dessiato (May 14, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Driver 'thought she was only going 110mph'
> 
> A motorist who was caught driving at up 115mph on a motorway told police she "thought she was only going 110mph".
> 
> ...


I love both the "only 110" and that her excuse was she was going to pick up a puppy. I hope she loses her licence.


----------



## hash tag (May 14, 2019)

But did she get the puppy?


----------



## Poi E (May 14, 2019)

I hope not.


----------



## T & P (May 14, 2019)

Not very bright either by the sound of it.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 19, 2019)




----------



## dessiato (May 19, 2019)

I can't think of anything appropriate to say. It's utterly appalling.


----------



## fishfinger (May 19, 2019)

I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and the power of the internal combustion engine. Amen.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 19, 2019)

bloke in the street got a new evoque early last year. just sat outside for a while, never got used until one day he went to use it and it wasnt there. He is a consultant in a hospital , so not an idiot. his new new one arrived this week. He has fitted a steering wheel Krooklok affair to keep it safe. £35K worth of car and he reverts to 20th century technology to keep it safe. In chatting I mentioned that I dont bother locking my mondy much of the time and did 3x his mileage in it last year. Why oh why oh why....


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 19, 2019)

hash tag said:


> But did she get the puppy?



it would be an RSPCA case of someone was caught with an innocent puppy in such a death trap


----------



## teuchter (May 19, 2019)

not-bono-ever said:


> bloke in the street got a new evoque early last year. just sat outside for a while, never got used until one day he went to use it and it wasnt there. He is a consultant in a hospital , so not an idiot. his new new one arrived this week. He has fitted a steering wheel Krooklok affair to keep it safe. £35K worth of car and he reverts to 20th century technology to keep it safe. In chatting I mentioned that I dont bother locking my mondy much of the time and did 3x his mileage in it last year. Why oh why oh why....


So you did zero mileage in your whatever too?


----------



## rubbershoes (May 19, 2019)

not-bono-ever said:


> bloke in the street got a new evoque early last year. just sat outside for a while, never got used until one day he went to use it and it wasnt there. He is a consultant in a hospital , so not an idiot. his new new one arrived this week. He has fitted a steering wheel Krooklok affair to keep it safe. £35K worth of car and he reverts to 20th century technology to keep it safe. In chatting I mentioned that I dont bother locking my mondy much of the time and did 3x his mileage in it last year. Why oh why oh why....



Keyless go cars are very susceptible to being nicked by people who know what they are doing . You'd think modern cars would have better security than your old mondeo but the list of most stolen cars shows otherwise.

Of course its partly that they're more desirable but still you'd think Mercedes etc would pull their finger out


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 19, 2019)

I thought the prefered way these days was just break into the house and nick the keys...


----------



## dylanredefined (May 19, 2019)

Saw a range rover clip a Porsche 911 in a motorway services carpark. The Drivers dealt with it like immature individuals. Crowd was forming as we left .


----------



## hash tag (May 19, 2019)

Pictures


----------



## hash tag (May 19, 2019)

PS 


hash tag said:


> A short run to get the papers. Both were noisey
> View attachment 171472


----------



## rubbershoes (May 19, 2019)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> I thought the prefered way these days was just break into the house and nick the keys...



 You can. But why not just activate the owner's key from outside with some  clever and illegal electronics


----------



## dylanredefined (May 19, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Pictures


 Sorry didn't think about. Sure it will be n you tube if they came to blows.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 19, 2019)

.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 21, 2019)

rubbershoes said:


> You can. But why not just activate the owner's key from outside with some  clever and illegal electronics



JLR are (amazingly) the only OEM not susceptible to SARA attacks on keyless go.

Porsche are invulnerable to replay attacks as they use rolling encryption keys.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 21, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> JLR are (amazingly) the only OEM not susceptible to SARA attacks on keyless go.



And just a £3.6bn loss this year


----------



## kebabking (May 21, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> And just a £3.6bn loss this year



You should have seen the RAC quote...


----------



## hash tag (Jun 4, 2019)

I saw an electric Hummer for sale yesterday and didn't know such things existed. ev-uae | HX,HXT HUMMER (LIMO): Electric Vehicle for Sale in Dubai, Abu Dhabi,Sharjah, UAE


----------



## fishfinger (Jun 4, 2019)

It looks like a Tonka toy.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 4, 2019)

Isn't that part of the appeal? But a range of 30 miles 
Whats the point?


----------



## ice-is-forming (Jun 4, 2019)

hash tag said:


> I saw an electric Hummer for sale yesterday and didn't know such things existed. ev-uae | HX,HXT HUMMER (LIMO): Electric Vehicle for Sale in Dubai, Abu Dhabi,Sharjah, UAE


----------



## Poi E (Jun 4, 2019)

Jimny is nicer and can actually go off road and not break itself and starting crying expensively. Wonder if they'll do a hybrid sometime


----------



## teuchter (Jun 4, 2019)




----------



## hash tag (Jun 12, 2019)

Aston's are a bit late to the party with their gender neutral SUV at around £140K 2020 Aston Martin DBX @ Top Speed


----------



## Poi E (Jun 12, 2019)

Doesn't matter. New jobs for people in Wales


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jun 12, 2019)

Christ, normal Astons fall apart on smooth tarmac, imagine the carnage once you take one off-road!


----------



## Poi E (Jun 12, 2019)

That's not what SUVs are for though, surely? Silly idea!


----------



## ska invita (Jun 12, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Christ, normal Astons fall apart on smooth tarmac, imagine the carnage once you take one off-road!


How do you know these things?


----------



## hash tag (Jun 12, 2019)

Astons are supposed to be one of the most expensive vehicles to service and maintain, which is why I dont get one.

PS to Bahnhof Strasse if it's not an Audi it'll fall apart.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jun 12, 2019)

That is bogging


----------



## DownwardDog (Jun 26, 2019)

Comin' again to save the mutherfuckin' day, yeah...


----------



## kebabking (Jun 26, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> Comin' again to save the mutherfuckin' day, yeah...



Shit the fucking bed.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jun 26, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Astons are supposed to be one of the most expensive vehicles to service and maintain, which is why I dont get one.
> 
> PS to Bahnhof Strasse if it's not an Audi it'll fall apart.



Had the car serviced yesterday, that plus four new tyres = 


Anyway, noticing more and more that road wankers seem to be favouring Teslas these days, seen a lot of them being driven very aggressively over the past few weeks...


----------



## kabbes (Jun 26, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Anyway, noticing more and more that road wankers seem to be favouring Teslas these days, seen a lot of them being driven very aggressively over the past few weeks...


Do you know, I commented on that just this weekend.  Lots of Teslas, lots of wankers driving them.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 26, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Had the car serviced yesterday, that plus four new tyres =
> 
> 
> Anyway, noticing more and more that road wankers seem to be favouring Teslas these days, seen a lot of them being driven very aggressively over the past few weeks...



It's an Audi. How many times you or Mrs been clocked? Now 4 new tyres, nuff said.
I suspect I might need to get new tyres for mine in time, simply because they are getting old!


----------



## hash tag (Jun 26, 2019)

Tesla's; silent assassins. They are pretty damn quick.


----------



## kabbes (Jun 26, 2019)

I had to get a new tyre for the Panda this week.  £50.


----------



## kebabking (Jun 26, 2019)

Why are tyres for the Audi so expensive?

4 Uniroyal Rain sports for mine - which is hardly a caravan - are about £300...


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jun 26, 2019)

kebabking said:


> Why are tyres for the Audi so expensive?


Wankers tax


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jun 26, 2019)

kebabking said:


> Why are tyres for the Audi so expensive?
> 
> 4 Uniroyal Rain sports for mine - which is hardly a caravan - are about £300...



*buys needlessly expensive car*

*whinges that it's expensive*


----------



## Teaboy (Jun 26, 2019)

kebabking said:


> Why are tyres for the Audi so expensive?
> 
> 4 Uniroyal Rain sports for mine - which is hardly a caravan - are about £300...



They'll be big and wide and very low profile.  All these things cost money and you don't really get any budget options in that area.  4 new tyres on my company car just cost £750 and that's just a Mazda.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jun 26, 2019)

Poi E said:


> Jimny is nicer and can actually go off road and not break itself and starting crying expensively. Wonder if they'll do a hybrid sometime



Dunno about a hybrid, I'm just waiting for them to make a version for adults.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jun 26, 2019)

The smaller 4wd have to have their tyres replaced in one go usually , else the wear differences can feck the gearbox/ diffs. It’s as if the manufacturers are in league with the tyre companies when designing a car. My mondy was 39 quid a corner for my North Korean chollima brand or whatever


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jun 26, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> *buys needlessly expensive car*
> 
> *whinges that it's expensive*



It's not needlessly expensive though, it needs to be expensive to demonstrate my inherent superiority over the lower orders, such as yourself.


----------



## 2hats (Jun 26, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It's not needlessly expensive though, it needs to be expensive to demonstrate my inherent superiority over the lower orders, such as yourself.


-eror +td


----------



## Poi E (Jun 26, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Dunno about a hybrid, I'm just waiting for them to make a version for adults.



Macho motor for Frank


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jun 26, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It's not needlessly expensive though, it needs to be expensive to demonstrate my inherent superiority over the lower orders, such as yourself.



If it's inherent, why does it need demonstrating?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jun 26, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> If it's inherent, why does it need demonstrating?



To make sure that even the most simple of people get the fucking message...


----------



## A380 (Jun 26, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> Comin' again to save the mutherfuckin' day, yeah...



I may have posted this before:


----------



## hash tag (Jun 26, 2019)

if I had a spare £ 70000 laying around I'd get a charger tomorrow. Would be happy with an SRT as opposed to the real high performance models.

I see all the Wimbledon tennis cars are out and about. Tonight I've seen both discoverys and Fpaces out and about familiarising themselves with local roads


----------



## hash tag (Jun 28, 2019)

At £450K this is not yer basic Volvo Volvo XC90 Armoured gets ballistic protection | PistonHeads


----------



## hash tag (Jul 12, 2019)

Range Rovers are really not worth getting hot under the collar over anymore, they are so yesterday.  The "Superyacht Land Tender" Range Rover 6x6 Pickup Is an Opulent Land Yacht-SUV


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 12, 2019)

*Is the Range Rover Sport the apex in arsehole wheels ?*

* *


*Yes.*


----------



## Poi E (Jul 12, 2019)

New build and tiny fucking windows.not the 1600s people.


----------



## dessiato (Jul 14, 2019)




----------



## hash tag (Jul 14, 2019)

It's so bad it's been posted at least twice (#543)


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 14, 2019)

still gopping enough to warrant another pic


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 14, 2019)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 177346


RR should be utterly ashamed of themselves for that one.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jul 14, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It's not needlessly expensive though, it needs to be expensive to demonstrate my inherent superiority over the lower orders, such as yourself.


Surely being able to tie your own shoelaces would be proof enough.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 14, 2019)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> RR should be utterly ashamed of themselves for that one.



It truly is foul isn't it? And in a crowded class of ugly, ugly cars.


----------



## dessiato (Jul 14, 2019)

Even this is better looking


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 14, 2019)

still gopping, them p-diddy wheels are nasty & probably about 500 quid a corner for rubber.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 16, 2019)

I would have a Cullinan if I had the money (I don't). The Bentayga has too much weight too far forward due to the W12 or "Hot V" V8 architecture. See also Lambo Urus/Audi Q8.


----------



## Poi E (Jul 16, 2019)

"Our answer to history, to the visionaries, adventurers, explorers and those who believe in the supremacy of liberty is the Rolls-Royce Cullinan." RR CEO.

Dork.


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Jul 16, 2019)

This is coming to Europe soon







I'd like to say cool if you're fording a river in it but wanky if you're in a supermarket carpark unless it's somewhere rugged. But I'm not sure if it isn't wanky all the time.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 16, 2019)

Poi E said:


> New build and tiny fucking windows.not the 1600s people.



Very much par for the course with new builds. Also the proportions of the windows are always wrong somehow. Everything is designed by people who know they will never have to live in it, that's the crux of the problem.


----------



## dylanredefined (Jul 16, 2019)

JuanTwoThree said:


> This is coming to Europe soon
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 Why fold the windscreen down?  There is a military reason(forget the reason). No doors fine in summer any wind or bad weather misery.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 16, 2019)

dylanredefined said:


> Why fold the windscreen down?



So you can hunker down in the passenger seat taking out motherfuckers with your AK47 while your driver inexplicably doesn't go deaf.


----------



## Poi E (Jul 16, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Very much par for the course with new builds. Also the proportions of the windows are always wrong somehow. Everything is designed by people who know they will never have to live in it, that's the crux of the problem.



I've noticed the "Victorian workhouse" revival amongst new builds, all given a tiny house with tiny rooms and a tiny garden and fuck communal living.

 Or we could just kick the nobility off the 45% of English land they own directly or through investment trusts. Motherfuckers will burn one day.


----------



## High Voltage (Jul 16, 2019)

JuanTwoThree said:


> This is coming to Europe soon
> 
> 
> 
> ...



As with most cars . . . It'd be better in black - WITH FLAMES AND LAZERS AND BIG SPOT LIGHTS


----------



## pinkychukkles (Jul 16, 2019)

Apologies if this is a stupid question but why does that jeep give the option of folding the front windscreen down for?


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 16, 2019)

JuanTwoThree said:


> This is coming to Europe soon
> 
> 
> 
> ...


And if you pay extra you actually get a complete car!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 16, 2019)

pinkychukkles said:


> Apologies if this is a stupid question but why does that jeep give the option of folding the front windscreen down for?



So the micro-dicked owners can pretend they are in the SAS.


----------



## pinkychukkles (Jul 16, 2019)

aaah, I see, so you can hoist your weaponry and open fire _as you drive_ on the school run 
Makes sense.


----------



## dylanredefined (Jul 16, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> So the micro-dicked owners can pretend they are in the SAS.


 The military reason is camouflage.No reflections. Also if you airdrop it. It can be padded and secured.
 You can also look really cool. Well till it starts to rain. Then you can as miserable as a yachty in the southern ocean without leaving the M25.


----------



## nogojones (Jul 16, 2019)

JuanTwoThree said:


> This is coming to Europe soon
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Are doors an additional extra?


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Jul 16, 2019)

Presumably those jeeps come with doors and roofs and stuff, but you leave them in your log cabin on fine days. 


Jeep Gladiator Arrives To Europe Next Year


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Jul 16, 2019)

Arrives to?


----------



## kebabking (Jul 16, 2019)

J'arrive?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 17, 2019)

Totes wank in London or any city but there is a simplicity about jeeps that I like. And a convertible pick up as well. Wowza


----------



## Poi E (Jul 21, 2019)

And I thought the pieces of shit just smoked

Shocking aftermath of M20 car fire shows burnt out Range Rover chassis

Star's anger at Jaguar Land Rover after Range Rover goes up in flames

Old Land Rover Catches Fire, Destroys Roughly 1400 Cars in U.K. | News | Car and Driver


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 21, 2019)

whatg do you call a range rover on fire on the side of a motorway ?

A start


----------



## kebabking (Jul 21, 2019)

What do you call a Range Rover on fire at the side of the Motorway?

A surprise.

I'm surprised it managed to get on the motorway...


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 21, 2019)

not-bono-ever said:


> whatg do you call a range rover on fire on the side of a motorway ?
> 
> A start



My mate went to buy a second hand range rover once, from somewhere a couple of counties away. He got back much later than expected, cursing about how the car had broken down after forty miles. So obviously we made a big show of getting out the imaginary notebook and asking around the room right, who had forty miles then?


----------



## likesfish (Jul 24, 2019)

nogojones said:


> Are doors an additional extra?



you can look like the SAS which is cool on a day like today 
  in February two hours in a fast attack buggy on the M1 trying to get arrested by motorway cops seemed a better idea than continuing 
fortunatly the engine broke bloody hippys filled  the engine with sugar Baby eating anarchists get everywhere


----------



## hash tag (Aug 7, 2019)

This must come close to the top of the pile


----------



## ska invita (Aug 8, 2019)

meanwhile in russia the apex would appear to be be the £100k+ mercedes gelenvagen
next level arsehole driving here:


----------



## hash tag (Aug 8, 2019)

I could certainly use a big Yank, but this 







This led me to here, be afraid, be VERY afraid 



Spoiler: care



The 25+ best Pink bmw ideas on Pinterest | Hot pink cars, Sexy cars and 2016 sports cars


----------



## hash tag (Aug 13, 2019)

It's a tank with a Dodge Demon inside Rezvani Tank - now with 1,000hp | PistonHeads


----------



## dessiato (Aug 13, 2019)

hash tag said:


> It's a tank with a Dodge Demon inside Rezvani Tank - now with 1,000hp | PistonHeads


I'd like that for post Brexit apocalypse. But I suspect that it isn't very economical so would quickly become a very small shelter from the rabid hoards.


----------



## A380 (Aug 13, 2019)

dessiato said:


> I'd like that for post Brexit apocalypse. But I suspect that it isn't very economical so would quickly become a very small shelter from the rabid hoards.


“ When you run out of fuel become a pill box.
When you run out of ammunition become a bunker.
When you run out of luck become heroes”

When you run out of taste become an oversized 4x4 driver...


----------



## rubbershoes (Aug 29, 2019)

My boss has gone to test drive a range rover sport.  I may print off this thread and leave it on their desk


----------



## hash tag (Aug 29, 2019)

"*Sometimes you just want to stand out from the crowd. *

Have not seen one of these before, a Maybach Maybach G650 Landaulet | Showpiece of the Week | PistonHeads
Where do you start on this? 
*"ESTIMATE €750,000-						  €850,000"					 2018 Maybach G650 Landaulet – Coys of Kensington*


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Aug 29, 2019)

hash tag said:


> "*Sometimes you just want to stand out from the crowd. *
> 
> Have not seen one of these before, a Maybach Maybach G650 Landaulet | Showpiece of the Week | PistonHeads
> Where do you start on this?
> *"ESTIMATE €750,000-						  €850,000"					 2018 Maybach G650 Landaulet – Coys of Kensington*




Is the Range Rover Sport the apex in arsehole wheels  ?


It doesn't do anything to be worth that price tag, other than shout that it costs a fortune. It's great


----------



## Proper Tidy (Aug 29, 2019)

I drove through shropshire the other day. Always been a twatty county imo but this view reinforced by volume of range rover sports & evoques in white


----------



## A380 (Sep 6, 2019)




----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 7, 2019)

some fuckton from up where i kinda originated from has been thumping facebook with pleas to locate their stolen pimped RR vogue ( its about 25 yer old and totes horrendous.fuckton had no insurance ( *mistake with the paperwork*). yesterday it was located 15 miles away. it had broken down whilst being driven away by the rascals. ffs


----------



## bimble (Sep 7, 2019)

Hello I just had to show somebody this and what better place. The horror. What I need to know is was it an unwanted gift from an arse of a husband or did she do that to her own self and look forward to the school run all Smug.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 7, 2019)

So the driver Bond's ma?


----------



## hash tag (Sep 7, 2019)

Perfect, for the school run, taking little Tabatha the half a mile to the gates.


----------



## dessiato (Sep 7, 2019)

What's a C00T MUM?


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 7, 2019)

bimble said:


> View attachment 183536 Hello I just had to show somebody this and what better place. The horror. What I need to know is was it an unwanted gift from an arse of a husband or did she do that to her own self and look forward to the school run all Smug.


She could easily have said no, so I reckon the latter.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 7, 2019)




----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 9, 2019)

anyway. i have worked out why all RR driver sit for hours outside your house  with their engine on -its is sensible -  they are worried it may never start again. 

and are selfish cunts


----------



## hash tag (Sep 9, 2019)

This gives me no joy Luxury Ranger Rover found stripped of its parts in street


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 9, 2019)

bimble said:


> View attachment 183536 Hello I just had to show somebody this and what better place. The horror. What I need to know is was it an unwanted gift from an arse of a husband or did she do that to her own self and look forward to the school run all Smug.



Hello bimble, flying visit or are you sticking around for a while?


----------



## hash tag (Sep 9, 2019)

Car was husbands doing, plate was hers I reckon.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 10, 2019)

hash tag said:


> This gives me no joy Luxury Ranger Rover found stripped of its parts in street
> 
> View attachment 183741



Didn't take the air struts  good money for those. Need a jack I suppose.


----------



## bimble (Sep 10, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Hello bimble, flying visit or are you sticking around for a while?


Hello Strasse! I dunno not sure I want to get back into spending days fighting on here and being me probably won’t be able to stick to the friendly bits but nice to see you : )


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 10, 2019)

Berliners call for 4x4 ban after four people killed in collision

Germany isnt happy about tanks on their streets- though this looks to be an unfortunate accident rather than twattery


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 10, 2019)

hash tag said:


> This gives me no joy Luxury Ranger Rover found stripped of its parts in street
> 
> View attachment 183741




Less to go wrong I suppose


----------



## A380 (Sep 11, 2019)




----------



## hash tag (Sep 11, 2019)

I thought that had been posted before, but hey, worth repeating.


----------



## T & P (Sep 11, 2019)

Unfortunately not seen in London where they’re most abundant. In Chelsea it can be as many as 1 in 4 parked vehicles. Would love one such poster to appear on SW3...


----------



## hash tag (Sep 12, 2019)

Not convinced about the colour


----------



## hash tag (Sep 12, 2019)

How about a twin turbo, V12 Brabus for roughly £600K.


----------



## dessiato (Sep 12, 2019)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 183959 Not convinced about the colour


It's a life size Lego kit, surely?


----------



## hash tag (Sep 12, 2019)

Not life size, but lego, yes.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 12, 2019)

not-bono-ever said:


> Berliners call for 4x4 ban after four people killed in collision
> 
> Germany isnt happy about tanks on their streets- though this looks to be an unfortunate accident rather than twattery



Twat of driver, but given what they were doing, I'm sure the same carnage could be caused by any decent sized car.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 26, 2019)

One more less






On the A23 yesterday we saw an X5 being loaded on to a trailer; its front end had been smashed up!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 26, 2019)

hash tag said:


> One more less



Dunno what's worse, the cars or your English!


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 28, 2019)

ideal xmas present for the RR sport owner


----------



## Poi E (Sep 29, 2019)

Retro Drive: SVM 3000 V6 - Leisure Wheels

South African attempt at a 4WD. Saw one in Makana a few days ago


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 29, 2019)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> Twat of driver, but given what they were doing, I'm sure the same carnage could be caused by any decent sized car.



Not true. Keep all other factors constant and increase the mass of a moving vehicle involved in a collision and you get more energy transferred and thus more damage, because physics. Another good reason why someone who chooses to drive an armoured personnel carrier in a suburban environment is probably a selfish cunt.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 29, 2019)

Never thought of that. "hey, yeah, I'll load up this mass with energy and not give a shit about how it might transfer to a tiny body."


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 29, 2019)

Poi E said:


> Never thought of that. "hey, yeah, I'll load up this mass with energy and not give a shit about how it might transfer to a tiny body."



They're pretty good in crash tests, at least as far as the people inside the vehicle are concerned. Anything outside the vehicle gets reduced to a fine paste, but who cares about that eh?


----------



## likesfish (Sep 29, 2019)

Trucks For Sale

a whole range of trucks for your inner child or evil government paramilitary organization saw one outside Aldi in Brighton they are hilariously over the top macho


----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 30, 2019)

I take it people know where the fashion for stupid 4x4 vehicles came from?

For those that don’t - regulations came into force in the US some years ago placing environmental standards on cars to reduce the impact on society from pollution and global warming. However, these didn’t apply to ‘Sports Utility Vehicles’ which were classed as vans. Hence if you wanted to bypass environmental legislation and still have a big twatty car this was the loophole you could exploit. A deliberate act of backwardsness. Hence the popularity with twats, which then spread around the globe.


----------



## Poi E (Sep 30, 2019)

I knew it was the government's fault!


----------



## dessiato (Sep 30, 2019)

Poi E said:


> I knew it was the government's fault!


Let's blame BloJob. Even if it's nothing to do with him. I don't like him so he'll do as a target of blame.


----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 30, 2019)

dessiato said:


> Let's blame BloJob. Even if it's nothing to do with him. I don't like him so he'll do as a target of blame.



Nah, he’s just responsible for scrapping the westward extension of the congestion charge zone and higher charges for the most polluting vehicles. A few dead asthmatics was a fair trade for some extra votes from Bentley owners in Kensington.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 1, 2019)

Dogsauce said:


> Nah, he’s just responsible for scrapping the westward extension of the congestion charge zone and higher charges for the most polluting vehicles. A few dead asthmatics was a fair trade for some extra votes from Bentley owners in Kensington.


At least that is his fault then.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 2, 2019)

This is virtually next door to me at home (I'm away at the moment)

Huge fire rips through Battersea Range Rover showroom destroying 4x4s | Metro News


----------



## mauvais (Oct 2, 2019)

Better gathered in one place than on numerous motorway hard shoulders.


----------



## T & P (Oct 2, 2019)

hash tag said:


> This is virtually next door to me at home (I'm away at the moment)
> 
> Huge fire rips through Battersea Range Rover showroom destroying 4x4s | Metro News


 Didn’t that showroom use to be an Audi dealership? Near the heliport, right?


----------



## teuchter (Oct 17, 2019)




----------



## nogojones (Oct 17, 2019)

teuchter said:


> View attachment 187377


Why did they put a width restriction there? Was it just to catch rangerovers?


----------



## mx wcfc (Oct 17, 2019)

nogojones said:


> Why did they put a width restriction there? Was it just to catch rangerovers?


Not sure what your point is.  If they did or didn't, it worked.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 17, 2019)

T & P said:


> Didn’t that showroom use to be an Audi dealership? Near the heliport, right?



It is indeed next door to the heliport. There has not been an Audi showroom there for at least 10 years.


----------



## nogojones (Oct 17, 2019)

mx wcfc said:


> Not sure what your point is.  If they did or didn't, it worked.


I've not seen that sort of width restriction before, I just wondered why?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 17, 2019)

nogojones said:


> I've not seen that sort of width restriction before, I just wondered why?



Who cares, if they piss off range rover drivers then they're a good thing.


----------



## teuchter (Oct 17, 2019)

nogojones said:


> Why did they put a width restriction there? Was it just to catch rangerovers?


Dunno. We should have more of them though.


----------



## nogojones (Oct 17, 2019)

teuchter said:


> Dunno. We should have more of them though.


Of varying width, just to keep people on their toes like


----------



## Leafster (Oct 18, 2019)

nogojones said:


> Why did they put a width restriction there? Was it just to catch rangerovers?


I think they are used to stop commercial vehicles using residential areas as rat runs. There is (or was one) on Factory Lane in Croydon between Roman Way and the A23


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 18, 2019)

There’s one of those at dulwich college - used to catch out the unwary odd parent until they discovered they could use their vehicles stunning off road ability to just bypass it on the grass verge.


----------



## T & P (Oct 18, 2019)

I've ranted about this plenty of times before but cunts on large 4x4s and vans who insist on using weight and width restricted Albert Bridge are worse than Hitler. There are permanent queues because the cunts in quesiton can't be arsed to use Battersea Bridge a few hundred metres down the road if this saves them a minute in their journey, so they slowly inch their way through the width restriction bollards at the entrance of the bridge. And quite a few get stuck too.


----------



## teuchter (Oct 18, 2019)

T & P said:


> I've ranted about this plenty of times before but cunts on large 4x4s and vans who insist on using weight and width restricted Albert Bridge are worse than Hitler. There are permanent queues because the cunts in quesiton can't be arsed to use Battersea Bridge a few hundred metres down the road if this saves them a minute in their journey, so they slowly inch their way through the width restriction bollards at the entrance of the bridge. And quite a few get stuck too.


Why don't you simply use Battersea Bridge to avoid the delays caused by this?


----------



## T & P (Oct 18, 2019)

teuchter said:


> Why don't you simply use Battersea Bridge to avoid the delays caused by this?


Because Albert Bridge is the closest bridge, directly on my route, and most importantly because I travel on vehicles that actually are well below the weight and width limits of the bridge in question. So I neither cause unnecessary strain on the bridge nor I have to slowly crawl past the bollards causing a traffic jam behnd me. Unlike the twats on large Transits or Range Rovers who shouldn't use Albert Bridge at all.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 18, 2019)

It is a tight left turn from the Embankment on to Albert Bridge and the restrictors are very close to the turning which doesn't help 
I recently saw a woman, with young child in car, go the wrong side of the road making this turn because she screwed it up so badly 
It would be better to use Chelsea bridge; Battersea Bridge is busy enough as it is and has no pedestrian lights for crossing any part of
that crossroads.


----------



## A380 (Oct 20, 2019)

Someone should start a collection. 


https://www.nottinghampost.com/news/nottingham-news/business-owners-fury-after-lamborghini-3439499


----------



## blairsh (Oct 20, 2019)

Tight cunt should just pay for being shit at parking tbf.


----------



## mx wcfc (Oct 20, 2019)

A380 said:


> Someone should start a collection.
> 
> 
> Business owner's fury after Lamborghini ticketed 'for not fitting in bay'


This has echoes of that prick who spent £30k trying to get off a speeding ticket.
Much as I hate freeloading lawyers, someone is going to do well out of this, and it ain't going to be the plonker who can't park his Lambo properly.


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 21, 2019)

Extra prick points for driving to the gym too.


----------



## kabbes (Oct 23, 2019)

Dogsauce said:


> Extra prick points for driving to the gym too.


No, that’s bullshit.  You have no idea how far he lives from the gym, not if he has any mobility problems that make walking there difficult.  Or maybe he just wants to spend his exercise time doing targeted exercise rather than walking along roads, which is also fair enough.

Driving a Lamborghini and parking like a twat are quite enough as reasons to think he’s a prick, frankly.


----------



## Chilli.s (Oct 23, 2019)

Outside RR dealerships would be a good place for extinction rebellion to demonstrate perhaps.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 23, 2019)

kabbes said:


> No, that’s bullshit.  You have no idea how far he lives from the gym, not if he has any mobility problems that make walking there difficult.  Or maybe he just wants to spend his exercise time doing targeted exercise rather than walking along roads, which is also fair enough.
> 
> Driving a Lamborghini and parking like a twat are quite enough as reasons to think he’s a prick, frankly.



I am not sure a Lambo or similar is a good idea for anyone with mobility problems; access may be difficult.


----------



## kabbes (Oct 23, 2019)

hash tag said:


> I am not sure a Lambo or similar is a good idea for anyone with mobility problems; access may be difficult.


Depends on the nature of the mobility problem.

People can be real judgemental pricks towards those who have physical problems.  It’s not up to those who have such problems to have to constantly justify themselves to strangers.  It would be a nice world if people just accepted that others can have reasons for things that they don’t necessarily constantly want to have to explain.


----------



## Poi E (Oct 23, 2019)

I've been that arsehole who saw a neighbour with a blue badge and apparently walking freely and thought "huh". Got to know said neighbour and she has awful arthritis that some days allows her a bit of mobility. Poi then realised that just 'cos you're not in a wheelchair...


----------



## dessiato (Oct 23, 2019)

Poi E said:


> I've been that arsehole who saw a neighbour with a blue badge and apparently walking freely and thought "huh". Got to know said neighbour and she has awful arthritis that some days allows her a bit of mobility. Poi then realised that just 'cos you're not in a wheelchair...


My deaf sister also has mobility issues that are not visible. The abuse she gets can be horrific. Her response is to say she doesn't care,  she can't hear them. Which is a good job given the hate I've heard levelled at her from the more ignorant amongst us.


----------



## Chilli.s (Oct 23, 2019)

kabbes said:


> Depends on the nature of the mobility problem.
> 
> People can be real judgemental pricks towards those who have physical problems.  It’s not up to those who have such problems to have to constantly justify themselves to strangers.  It would be a nice world if people just accepted that others can have reasons for things that they don’t necessarily constantly want to have to explain.



Sadly that's the human condition.

My one armed one legged friend always gets abuse on the tube cos they can't go on the right side of the escalators.  No cunt ever apologises at the bottom though, even when they finally realise how wrong they are. They just scurry off. me pall has been driven off the tube by this, it's just too much agro.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 23, 2019)

A lambo with a disabled parking badge would be a novelty. Saying that, I remember there was an issue of a dentist with a Bentley fraudently using a disabled badge.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 23, 2019)

hash tag said:


> A lambo with a disabled parking badge would be a novelty. Saying that, I remember there was an issue of a dentist with a Bentley fraudently using a disabled badge.



Get a lot of brand new Ranger Rovers round here displaying blue badges, but not seen any lambos.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 23, 2019)

A RR makes more sense than a sports car as they are much more accessible. Besides, why shouldn't the good people of Guildford be able to park where they like and without paying.


----------



## dessiato (Oct 23, 2019)

hash tag said:


> A RR makes more sense than a sports car as they are much more accessible. Besides, why shouldn't the good people of Guildford be able to park where they like and without paying.


Many of the do of course.


----------



## kabbes (Oct 23, 2019)

When working in my old office building, I used every day to walk past at the exact moment this guy pulled up in one of those expensive BMW sports things (not a Z3 or Z4 but a proper job) and got out somehow pulling a wheelchair after him.

No reason why somebody should have to give up on the car they want just because of a disability.


----------



## kebabking (Oct 23, 2019)

Why would someone with Autism not drive a Lambo - apart from on grounds of taste?


----------



## nogojones (Oct 23, 2019)

kabbes said:


> No, that’s bullshit.  You have no idea how far he lives from the gym, not if he has any mobility problems that make walking there difficult.



Edit - already covered


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 23, 2019)

kabbes said:


> When working in my old office building, I used every day to walk past at the exact moment this guy pulled up in one of those expensive BMW sports things (not a Z3 or Z4 but a proper job) and got out somehow pulling a wheelchair after him.
> 
> No reason why somebody should have to give up on the car they want just because of a disability.




Its an 850i from the '90s and he parks there all the time.

eta, not stalky but i remember stuff like this


----------



## kabbes (Oct 23, 2019)

not-bono-ever said:


> Its an 850i from the '90s and he parks there all the time.
> 
> eta, not stalky but i remember stuff like this


The LUC?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 24, 2019)

cruella devilles offices


----------



## dessiato (Oct 24, 2019)

I was recently talking to a friend who has a Bristol, a Ferrari, a Porsche,  a 1955 Morgan (some sort of rare version, can't remember which) who said if I really wanted (I don't) a 4×4 the Range Rover was the best. He even suggested the Evoque wasn't that bad although it's a Freelander in a party frock.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 24, 2019)

kabbes said:


> No, that’s bullshit.  You have no idea how far he lives from the gym, not if he has any mobility problems that make walking there difficult.  Or maybe he just wants to spend his exercise time doing targeted exercise rather than walking along roads, which is also fair enough.
> 
> Driving a Lamborghini and parking like a twat are quite enough as reasons to think he’s a prick, frankly.



Nobody with mobility problems would drive a Lamborghini. Fucking things are four inches off the floor.


----------



## kabbes (Oct 24, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Nobody with mobility problems would drive a Lamborghini. Fucking things are four inches off the floor.


See earlier responses.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 24, 2019)

kebabking said:


> Why would someone with Autism not drive a Lambo - apart from on grounds of taste?



Because the noise they make is basically a hate crime against autistic people?


----------



## hash tag (Oct 25, 2019)

If you look at the video you will see that this thing really is as pretty as it looks in the picture. Nice. Bollinger B1 electric SUV priced from $125,000 | PistonHeads


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 25, 2019)

hash tag said:


> If you look at the video you will see that this thing really is as pretty as it looks in the picture. Nice. Bollinger B1 electric SUV priced from $125,000 | PistonHeads
> 
> View attachment 188057



Cor, that's proper shit.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 25, 2019)

The fake exhaust on the new Audi S6 indicates a new apogee in arsehole wheels.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 25, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> The fake exhaust on the new Audi S6 indicates a new apogee in arsehole wheels.
> 
> View attachment 188080



It's a crap car. The old S6 had the 4ltr petrol RS6 engine, the new one has a 3ltr diesel.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 25, 2019)

Audi's and fakes; a certain symmetry don't you think?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 25, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Audi's and fakes; a certain symmetry don't you think?



As I understand it, Audi took their inspiration from these cars...



 


My eyesight's not what it was, can you tell me the make of these cars please hash tag?


----------



## hash tag (Oct 25, 2019)

My beloved Brera had two twins. All four worked


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 25, 2019)

hash tag said:


> My beloved Brera had two twins. All four worked



Not just Alfa's, seems it might be an Italian trait...


----------



## kebabking (Oct 25, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Not just Alfa's, seems it might be an Italian trait...
> 
> View attachment 188083



I bet that looks sexy AF on the hard shoulder....


----------



## teuchter (Oct 28, 2019)




----------



## hash tag (Oct 28, 2019)

No surprises there.


----------



## rubbershoes (Oct 28, 2019)

hash tag said:


> If you look at the video you will see that this thing really is as pretty as it looks in the picture. Nice. Bollinger B1 electric SUV priced from $125,000 | PistonHeads
> 
> View attachment 188057



Is it made of meccano?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Nov 5, 2019)

Just saw a Range Rover with the number plate _5INCH_. 

Says it all really.


----------



## dessiato (Nov 5, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Just saw a Range Rover with the number plate _5INCH_.
> 
> Says it all really.


Small dick. Why would you want advertise yourself that way?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Nov 5, 2019)

dessiato said:


> Small dick. Why would you want advertise yourself that way?



My question is why bother with the number plate when you've already bought a Range Rover to advertise the fact that you are poorly endowed.


----------



## dessiato (Nov 5, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> My question is why bother with the number plate when you've already bought a Range Rover to advertise the fact that you are poorly endowed.


Have you noticed that the women driving tend to be small too? It would seem both men and women driving them are trying to compensate for some perceived inadequacy.


----------



## BigTom (Nov 6, 2019)

dessiato said:


> Small dick. Why would you want advertise yourself that way?



I saw a car with DR 51NCH once, with a black capped screw trying to make the C into a G. I guess another Dr Singh had already got the plate with the G.


----------



## rubbershoes (Nov 6, 2019)

BigTom said:


> I saw a car with DR 51NCH once, with a black capped screw trying to make the C into a G. I guess another Dr Singh had already got the plate with the G.



My dad used to have DR2000 and DR3000, and wasn't a doctor at all.


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 6, 2019)

Dartz Black Stallion. Close the thread. It's over.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Nov 6, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> Dartz Black Stallion. Close the thread. It's over.



I've always wanted to drive around in Minas Morgul from Lord of the Rings.


----------



## dessiato (Nov 6, 2019)

rubbershoes said:


> My dad used to have DR2000 and DR3000, and wasn't a doctor at all.


A friend bought a Porsche 944 something or other that was registered A944 WAK as the original plate. I'm sure it would have been expensive had it been bought as a vanity plate. 

His brother had a Martini 924 which had a similar plate issued at first registration.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 6, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> Dartz Black Stallion. Close the thread. It's over.



I like it, would look great in LA. Perhaps not so well suited to the Cotswolds though...


----------



## Poi E (Nov 6, 2019)

That crisp pressing of panels in modern cars. How did that come about? First time I noticed it was the original TT in the 1990s. Advances in steel? Stamping?


----------



## kebabking (Nov 6, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> I like it, would look great in LA. Perhaps not so well suited to the Cotswolds though...



Cheshire on the other hand....


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 6, 2019)

Poi E said:


> That crisp pressing of panels in modern cars. How did that come about? First time I noticed it was the original TT in the 1990s. Advances in steel? Stamping?



It's to make the panels stiffer so they can use thinner materials. Body panels in the 50s were usually 14 gage, most OEMs are down to 22 gage now...


----------



## Dogsauce (Nov 7, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> Dartz Black Stallion. Close the thread. It's over.



Stuff like that is always best when it parks up and some slightly built balding middle age bloke shuffles out. There was one of those Mitsubishi pick-ups with a huge ‘barbarian’ logo on the side by my old work driven by such a character. I bet he’s got a massive elaborate gas barbecue in the garden at home too.


----------



## AverageJoe (Nov 7, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> Nobody with mobility problems would drive a Lamborghini. Fucking things are four inches off the floor.



Unbelievably, one has just pulled up outside the pub I'm in. And put a disabled sticker in the window.

Not all disabilities are visible though


----------



## AverageJoe (Nov 7, 2019)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 7, 2019)

That's kabbes' new motor.


----------



## Pickman's model (Nov 7, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> That's kabbes' new motor.


with optional blue badge


----------



## kabbes (Nov 7, 2019)

It’s a nice thought but where would the dog go?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 7, 2019)

kabbes said:


> It’s a nice thought but where would the dog go?



Driver's seat. Collies are well clever, if they can drive sheep they can drive a bull.


----------



## kabbes (Nov 7, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Driver's seat. Collies are well clever, if they can drive sheep they can drive a bull.


That’s true.  Whenever we go off and leave him in the boot, he’s always in the driver’s seat when we come back.  I think he’s not far off hotwiring it


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 7, 2019)

More blue-badge cuntery in town today...

 


Appears parking like a shithead is now worthy of a badge...


----------



## hash tag (Nov 7, 2019)

fwiw my fil is waiting for his blue badge and guess what, he cannot park to save his life.
Mrs t has been given an exemption in the car park and because no one else needs or wants it, has been allowed to use one of the
disabled parking spaces for one of her cars because she cannot park either!
saves her hitting other cars


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 7, 2019)

According to the bloke who works in the shop hidden by the bus the Mercedes driver didn't come back for over 25 minutes


----------



## A380 (Nov 17, 2019)

I do feel bad about posting this....


----------



## Poi E (Nov 17, 2019)

Audi are sort of solid and safe, like BMW before the coke and steroids.


----------



## hash tag (Nov 17, 2019)

This evening I was being harassed by an Audi that was following me in a 20 limit. How did I know it was an Audi? It had the rings on the front grill which were lit up 
Is this a thing now?


----------



## pseudonarcissus (Nov 18, 2019)

hash tag said:


> This evening I was being harassed by an Audi that was following me in a 20 limit. How did I know it was an Audi? It had the rings on the front grill which were lit up
> Is this a thing now?


You’re old when you remember Wolseley’s having illuminated badges


----------



## Saul Goodman (Nov 18, 2019)

pseudonarcissus said:


> You’re old when you remember Wolseley’s having illuminated badges
> View attachment 190264


Wrong thread.


----------



## T & P (Nov 18, 2019)

hash tag said:


> This evening I was being harassed by an Audi that was following me in a 20 limit. How did I know it was an Audi? It had the rings on the front grill which were lit up
> Is this a thing now?


I've seen one or two in the last year, but no more than that, so I'd assumed it's an 'unofficial' speccing up. It's looks tacky & wanky as fuck at any rate.


----------



## hash tag (Nov 18, 2019)

it's really a thing 
Just in case people had any doubts about Audi drivers being complete knobs, there really is no mistaking it now 
Oh laugh....


----------



## Poi E (Nov 19, 2019)

Surprised that's not a factory option. Looks pretty cool.


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 19, 2019)

The illuminated rings look sick and I'd have them if I had another Audi.

Dunno about the projected Audi symbol puddle lights though, that's a bit much.


----------



## hash tag (Nov 20, 2019)

Which of the extras would people choose?
The gun cabinet. Any one of the three covers, the dog partition, the portable dog washer.....
https://media.astonmartin.com/aston-martin-dbx-accessories-set-to-deliver-life-of-luxury/


----------



## Leafster (Nov 20, 2019)

I quite like the idea of boot warmers.


----------



## kebabking (Nov 20, 2019)

the DBX isn't big enough for a dog. well, not a proper dog anyway...

probably has to be the touring pack - it will be good for long, fast drives to Scotland, but its not really an SUV to take stalking so no point putting the gun cabinet in, its not big enough to take the kids skiiing - or perhaps the event pack. how else would one come by a picnic hamper...


----------



## dessiato (Nov 20, 2019)

Leafster said:


> I quite like the idea of boot warmers.


At home I use a hairdryer for this.


----------



## hash tag (Nov 20, 2019)

Oh dess only you could do this and have some major incident happen


----------



## dessiato (Nov 20, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Oh dess only you could do this and have some major incident happen


I warm my socks this way too. Never had an accident doing it.


----------



## Spymaster (Nov 20, 2019)

dessiato said:


> I warm my socks this way too. Never had an accident doing it.


You warm your socks?


----------



## dessiato (Nov 20, 2019)

Spymaster said:


> You warm your socks?


Of course. Doesn’t everyone?


----------



## hash tag (Nov 20, 2019)

dessiato said:


> I warm my socks this way too. Never had an accident doing it.



Yet!

I have never been one for warming socks, shoes, boots or gloved, preferring to do it eu naturelle


----------



## Saul Goodman (Nov 20, 2019)

dessiato said:


> Of course. Doesn’t everyone?


No. You're possibly the only person in the world who does it.


----------



## hash tag (Nov 22, 2019)

I thought Maybach's had been retired.  Behold the Mercedes-Maybach GLS 600 | PistonHeads
No prices quoted.


----------



## Poi E (Nov 22, 2019)

this is cheaper


----------



## hash tag (Nov 26, 2019)

You don't need a chelsea tractor to piss people off Family wait hour to confront biker who used parent parking space at Sainsbury's

An hour


----------



## kebabking (Nov 26, 2019)

i saw a RR sport in Chrome today.

i thought, now there's a classy person...


----------



## Spymaster (Nov 26, 2019)

hash tag said:


> You don't need a chelsea tractor to piss people off Family wait hour to confront biker who used parent parking space at Sainsbury's
> 
> An hour



Looks to me that they're full of shit. Look at all the empty parent and child parking spots around that bike. And who but a confrontational arsehole would hang around for an hour just to have a barney? 

I'd have told them to fuck off too.


----------



## nogojones (Nov 26, 2019)

Spymaster said:


> Looks to me that they're full of shit. Look at all the empty parent and child parking spots around that bike. And who but a confrontational arsehole would hang around for an hour just to have a barney?
> 
> I'd have told them to fuck off too.


She made her three year old hang around in a car park for an hour to tick off someone when there's clearly loads of free spaces. That child is gonna grow up happy and cheerful.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 26, 2019)

Would’ve been well funny if a Vietnamese family came out and four of them piled on to the bike...


----------



## T & P (Nov 28, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Would’ve been well funny if a Vietnamese family came out and four of them piled on to the bike...


You only need one kid as pillion to be legally parked there so the family in question were just guessing. A parent on a bike with several shopping bags (which many bikes can take in storage) is going to struggle as much on the walk back to their vehicle as one in a car.


----------



## Marty1 (Nov 28, 2019)

hash tag said:


> You don't need a chelsea tractor to piss people off Family wait hour to confront biker who used parent parking space at Sainsbury's
> 
> An hour






> The family - who did not want to be named - waited for nearly an hour for the biker to leave the shop to confront him - *only to be told to f*** off*.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 5, 2019)

At the other end of the scale, I have just seen this couple on the box, who loath 4x4's.


----------



## nogojones (Dec 7, 2019)




----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 7, 2019)

Fucking hell


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 8, 2019)

nogojones said:


> View attachment 192188 View attachment 192189



The Aventador looks great no matter what you do to it!


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 8, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> The Aventador looks great no matter what you do to it!


No.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 8, 2019)

Does the same also apply to an Espada? Bid On The World's Coolest Rat Rod: A 1968 Lamborghini Espada | Motorious.com


----------



## kebabking (Dec 8, 2019)

Nah, they're just cock substitutes - if you can't fit a fridge-freezer in it it's not a real car - it's something for footballers, estate agents, and mobile phone salesmen.

It's a big watch, hair dye and shiny suit with wheels.


----------



## nogojones (Dec 8, 2019)

n


kebabking said:


> Nah, they're just cock substitutes - if you can't fit a fridge-freezer in it it's not a real car - it's something for footballers, estate agents, and mobile phone salesmen.
> 
> It's a big watch, hair dye and shiny suit with wheels.


I'd put a roof rack on it for carrying junk around


----------



## A380 (Dec 8, 2019)

kebabking said:


> Nah, they're just cock substitutes - if you can't fit a fridge-freezer in it it's not a real car - it's something for footballers, estate agents, and mobile phone salesmen.
> 
> It's a big watch, hair dye and shiny suit with wheels.


But I have a small car and a small penis. Explain that one then.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Does the same also apply to an Espada? Bid On The World's Coolest Rat Rod: A 1968 Lamborghini Espada | Motorious.com


I had an Espada doing this to it is criminal. Anyone doing this should be one of the first against the wall...but why wait? Just do it now to save time later.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 8, 2019)

dessiato you had an espada  Seriously



A380 said:


> But I have a small car and a small penis. Explain that one then.



Not a petrolhead.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

hash tag said:


> dessiato you had an espada  Seriously
> 
> 
> 
> Not a petrolhead.


A long time ago.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 8, 2019)

1973 Lamborghini Espada for Sale | Classic Cars for Sale UK


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

hash tag said:


> 1973 Lamborghini Espada for Sale | Classic Cars for Sale UK


 wish I still had it!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 8, 2019)

hash tag said:


> dessiato you had an espada  Seriously
> 
> 
> 
> Not a petrolhead.



A380’s more of kerosene head...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 8, 2019)

hash tag said:


> 1973 Lamborghini Espada for Sale | Classic Cars for Sale UK



I bet you’d get at least 10 metres of happy motoring with that thing before the RAC became part of you life.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> I bet you’d get at least 10 metres of happy motoring with that thing before the RAC became part of you life.


It snapped a camshaft. It was cheaper to have one made than to get one from Italy. 

I think it was replaced by a 1971 Firebird. Until it needed a steering pump and a radiator. Then a Europa, a Lancia HPE, a Bentley T1, an XJS. Then more ordinary stuff.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 8, 2019)

Something tells me I wish I had never mentioned it now...firebird and lancia


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Something tells me I wish I had never mentioned it now...firebird and lancia


The Firebird was IIRC 7.5 litre. The Lancia was a very good car. Very quick. I got 120 out of it on the A16. But that's another story.  (155 indicated on the A1 in the Jag)


----------



## Saul Goodman (Dec 8, 2019)

dessiato said:


> The Lancia was a very good car.



It's not that they were a good car, it's that they didn't give you enough time to find out how bad they were. After 5 or 6 years, all that was left of them was a load of holes, held together with patches of rotten metal.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

Saul Goodman said:


> It's not that they were a good car, it's that they didn't give you enough time to find out how bad they were. After 5 or 6 years, all that was left of them was a load of holes, held together with patches of rotten metal.


I got rid of my HPE at 4. My mates had Fulvia, and Flavia. They didn't rust.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Dec 8, 2019)

dessiato said:


> I got rid of my HPE at 4. My mates had Fulvia, and Flavia. They didn't rust.


Remember this?


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

Saul Goodman said:


> Remember this?



And yet fewer of them suffered rust problems than Allegro steering breaking and people being seriously hurt, and Sierra catching fire.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Dec 8, 2019)

dessiato said:


> And yet fewer of them suffered rust problems than Allegro steering breaking and people being seriously hurt, and Sierra catching fire.


I think that's because more than 100 people actually bought all aggros  But yeah, they were a bag of shite, too. Most cars were shit back then, but Lancia brought shit to a new level. I think the steel they used was like MDF, but instead of fibres they used recycled rust from those all aggros.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 8, 2019)

Saul Goodman said:


> I think that's because more than 100 people actually bought all aggros  But yeah, they were a bag of shite, too. Most cars were shit back then, but Lancia brought shit to a new level. I think the steel they used was like MDF, but instead of fibres they used recycled rust from those all aggros.


If I remember correctly there was only a small number bought back because of structural problems. Fewer than crashed Allergies or Sierras burned out. But the media did what it does. 

Yes quality of the metal was poor, yes the body rotted, but they weren't dangerous to drive. (Except at double the speed limit. That was a bit dodgy)


----------



## Saul Goodman (Dec 8, 2019)

dessiato said:


> Yes quality of the metal was poor, yes the body rotted, *but they weren't dangerous to drive.*


Yeah, because there's nothing dangerous about driving along the motorway and your engine suddenly falling out onto the road because the subframe supporting it had rotted away


----------



## nogojones (Dec 9, 2019)

Saul Goodman said:


> Yeah, because there's nothing dangerous about driving along the motorway and your engine suddenly falling out onto the road because the subframe supporting it had rotted away


It was the 70's. All the cars were shit. I used to have to hold the door of my escort closed when I went round left hand bends to stop it falling off.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 9, 2019)

Saul Goodman said:


> Yeah, because there's nothing dangerous about driving along the motorway and your engine suddenly falling out onto the road because the subframe supporting it had rotted away


Except they didn't. But Allegro steering did fail and people did get badly injured. Sierra heating ducts, made of cardboard, did fall off and cars did catch fire. I remember the fuss about Allegro and Sierra because it was happening at about the same time as I had Lancia.


----------



## T & P (Dec 9, 2019)

hash tag said:


> 1973 Lamborghini Espada for Sale | Classic Cars for Sale UK


Gotta love the airplane cockpit-style console, complete  with seatbelt warning light...


----------



## hash tag (Dec 9, 2019)

That was of its day. I suspect the Lotus Elite may have been similar and a Ferrari. A 328?


----------



## dessiato (Dec 10, 2019)

1986 328 GTS interior




The Espada interior is from the late 70s


----------



## Poi E (Dec 10, 2019)

So you sort of squeeze your legs over to the right to get to the pedals. Looks like a horrible driving position.


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 10, 2019)

Poi E said:


> So you sort of squeeze your legs over to the right to get to the pedals. Looks like a horrible driving position.



It's so you can operate the brake and accelerator simultaneously with your right foot to rev match on downshifts.


----------



## dessiato (Dec 10, 2019)

It wasn’t a great position all round. The pedal off-set was made worse by a short leg, long arm seating position.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 10, 2019)

Back onto 4X4's...with a tory MP Richard Grosvenor Plunkett-Ernle-Erle-Drax


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 10, 2019)

hash tag said:


> Back onto 4X4's...with a tory MP Richard Grosvenor Plunkett-Ernle-Erle-Drax


You really couldn’t come up with a better way of capturing the Tory party than an old, polluting, 4x4 parked across a disabled parking bay.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 10, 2019)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> You really couldn’t come up with a better way of capturing the Tory party than an old, polluting, 4x4 parked across a disabled parking bay.



You missed selfish bastard! 

PS not all disabilities are visible!


----------



## weltweit (Dec 10, 2019)

There was a report that our love of larger SUVs is now causing greater greenhouse gas emissions. 

Bad SUV, bad moto


----------



## ska invita (Dec 10, 2019)

Rise of SUVs 'makes mockery' of electric car push

Amazed so many people have the money to literally burn


----------



## Poi E (Dec 12, 2019)

DownwardDog said:


> It's so you can operate the brake and accelerator simultaneously with your right foot to rev match on downshifts.



Buy I can do that in most cars quite comfortably.

It's shit design really, isn't it? It's where they compromised the footwell for suspension componentry.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 17, 2019)

Caught this this morning, an interview with Marek Reichman about the new Aston. Worth a listen for such bollocks. In the Studio - Designing the new Aston Martin - BBC Sounds


----------



## friedaweed (Dec 17, 2019)

*Superhero Ellie Goulding jumps out of her Land-rover Sport to help driver 'T-boned' by Royal Mail truck*

*Ellie Goulding helps driver shunted by truck*

**


----------



## hash tag (Dec 17, 2019)

sorry friedaweed ...


hash tag said:


> Don't know how the hell this happened, but did the lorry driver not hear a little know as he hit the VW?
> Ellie Goulding helps driver shunted by truck


----------



## SpookyFrank (Dec 17, 2019)

ska invita said:


> Rise of SUVs 'makes mockery' of electric car push
> 
> Amazed so many people have the money to literally burn



They're all on tick init. And the finance is often set up in such a way that you're encouraged to fuck off a perfectly good car and get a new one after three or four years.


----------



## ska invita (Dec 17, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> They're all on tick init. And the finance is often set up in such a way that you're encouraged to fuck off a perfectly good car and get a new one after three or four years.


Tick is still  big monthly payments 
Plus petrol  on those huge engines


----------



## SpookyFrank (Dec 17, 2019)

ska invita said:


> Tick is still  big monthly payments
> Plus petrol  on those huge engines



But you can't put a price on status. 

Well, I can. Zero pounds and fuck all pence. But clearly there are a lot of people for whom a slightly higher driving position is worth considerable financial hardship.


----------



## ska invita (Dec 17, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> But you can't put a price on status.
> 
> Well, I can. Zero pounds and fuck all pence. But clearly there are a lot of people for whom a slightly higher driving position is worth considerable financial hardship.


I do wonder if it is financial hardship or are there just a lot of people out there with loadsamoney. It relates to the election...yes theres lots of poverty, yes the younger generation in particular are seeing a decrease in living standards, but maybe there's still a boom for a substantial number of people hence the chelsea tractor spreading well beyond that bit of west london. Rising inequality has the aspect of rising wealth one side of the balance.
Its a lot of people doing this:


----------



## 2hats (Dec 17, 2019)

SpookyFrank said:


> But clearly there are a lot of people for whom a *slightly higher driving position* is worth considerable financial hardship.


Likely the only way they can get it up.


----------



## Leafster (Dec 31, 2019)




----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 31, 2019)

Leafster said:


>




It could be a RR Sport PHEV. It's worth having a plug in hybrid at the moment just to get the primo parking spots.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Dec 31, 2019)

I was followed by a ‘19 reg RR sport at the weekend until it found a dangerous blind corner to effortlessly overtake me. I thought it was a pair of motorbikes , as one headlamp was utter cockeyed and seemed to be permanent full beam. How can a newish car have issues like this ?


----------



## hash tag (Jan 17, 2020)

Spoiler


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 17, 2020)

China anger after woman drives into Forbidden City
					

Social media users ask how a woman could have driven into the former imperial palace in Beijing.



					www.bbc.co.uk
				




vulgar 4x4 twattery by rich kid in a G Wagen


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Jan 19, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> I was followed by a ‘19 reg RR sport at the weekend until it found a dangerous blind corner to effortlessly overtake me. I thought it was a pair of motorbikes , as one headlamp was utter cockeyed and seemed to be permanent full beam. How can a newish car have issues like this ?



I've noticed the headlight issue on the commute recently, every time I am blinded by a car coming the other way, it's usually a Range Rover Sport. It must be a design fault, unless the drivers are just too thick to dip their lights? 

An MOT failure, surely?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 19, 2020)

Rosemary Jest said:


> I've noticed the headlight issue on the commute recently, every time I am blinded by a car coming the other way, it's usually a Range Rover Sport. It must be a design fault, unless the drivers are just too thick to dip their lights?
> 
> An MOT failure, surely?



JLR products in heap of shit shocker!


----------



## dessiato (Jan 19, 2020)

Rosemary Jest said:


> I've noticed the headlight issue on the commute recently, every time I am blinded by a car coming the other way, it's usually a Range Rover Sport. It must be a design fault, unless the drivers are just too thick to dip their lights?
> 
> An MOT failure, surely?


Or both


----------



## dessiato (Jan 19, 2020)

I’ve been looking at possibly buying one.


----------



## Proper Tidy (Jan 19, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I’ve been looking at possibly buying one.


why


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Jan 19, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> why



To blind other road users?


----------



## hash tag (Jan 19, 2020)

Either a range rover or a bigger television or maybe to collect a bigger television. Either way, it could be a substitute for one's inadequacies


----------



## dessiato (Jan 19, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> why


Because we are looking at buying a house in the mountains so we can go skiing and down the mountains to the beach to go SUP and fishing in the afternoons.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 19, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Because we are looking at buying a house in the mountains so we can go skiing and down the mountains to the beach to go SUP and fishing in the afternoons.



In which case get a Nissan Pathfinder. Its a bit like a RR, but half the price, not built by a fuckwit having a seizure, or owned by a massive, suppurating cunt. We have one - it's brilliant.

Mitsubishi Shoguns are also very good.


----------



## Proper Tidy (Jan 19, 2020)

Kia Sportage, cheaper to buy cheaper to run does the same thing but breaks down less


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 19, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Because we are looking at buying a house in the mountains so we can go skiing and down the mountains to the beach to go SUP and fishing in the afternoons.




dont. please dont. a Dacia duster is the default country wheels for the budget minded consumer these days. far better and more capable than you think it would be


----------



## dessiato (Jan 19, 2020)

I’ll have a look. But RR in Spain have a different cachet to that in the UK.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 19, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I’ll have a look. But RR in Spain have a different cachet to that in the UK.



What’s Spanish for RAC? You will need to gen up on that.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 19, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> What’s Spanish for RAC? You will need to gen up on that.


RACE already got it


----------



## kebabking (Jan 19, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I’ll have a look. But RR in Spain have a different cachet to that in the UK.



The cachet may not travel, but the build quality does. I'm assuming the price does as well....


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 19, 2020)

dessiato said:


> But RR in Spain have a different cachet to that in the UK.


Not that different though is it. Whilst in the UK we think that RR drivers are dickheads, in Spain the common attitude is that _all_ British cars are overpriced and driven by show-offs.


----------



## Sasaferrato (Jan 19, 2020)

coley said:


> Any one driving a LR with a canvas hood has probably lots of experience of being waterboarded


Not great when you are in the back either. I rolled a SWB Landrover once, thankfully I was wearing a seatbelt, which wasn't compulsory then.


----------



## A380 (Jan 19, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I’ll have a look. But RR in Spain have a different cachet to that in the UK.



So does Bull fighting- it doesn’t make that a good idea either.


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Jan 19, 2020)

Face it, any car, a cheap hatchback, with snow/ winter tyres will be just as capable, if not more capable than a Range Rover Sport off road or in bad weather.

Your feet are more capable, and they're free, relatively speaking. Plus, your feet aren't a pair of cunts, most probably.


----------



## Sasaferrato (Jan 19, 2020)

Sasaferrato said:


> Not great when you are in the back either. I rolled a SWB Landrover once, thankfully I was wearing a seatbelt, which wasn't compulsory then.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 19, 2020)

Rosemary Jest said:


> Face it, any car, a cheap hatchback, with snow/ winter tyres will be just as capable, if not more capable than a Range Rover Sport off road or in bad weather.
> 
> Your feet are more capable, and they're free, relatively speaking. Plus, your feet aren't a pair of cunts, most probably.


I’ve driven in deep snow, mud, and beaches. What you say is true, to a point, but a 4x4 will do it better than a cheap hatchback, even with winter tyres.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jan 19, 2020)

Rosemary Jest said:


> Face it, any car, a cheap hatchback, with snow/ winter tyres will be just as capable, if not more capable than a Range Rover Sport off road or in bad weather.


It really won't. I might dislike RRs, and most certainly dislike most of the types that drive them, but a Nissan Micra aint gonna do this.


----------



## ska invita (Jan 20, 2020)




----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 20, 2020)

Rosemary Jest said:


> Face it, any car, a cheap hatchback, with snow/ winter tyres will be just as capable, if not more capable than a Range Rover Sport off road or in bad weather.
> 
> Your feet are more capable, and they're free, relatively speaking. Plus, your feet aren't a pair of cunts, most probably.



RR Sports are great off road; far better than an econobox because they've got self-levelling suspension, two speed transfer cases, locking diffs, etc. It's the not the capability that's the issue but the abysmal build quality.


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Jan 20, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> It's the not the capability that's the issue but the abysmal build quality.



I think it might be the arseholes driving them that is the real issue here.   

And the lack of legal headlights, obviously.


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

If you want to drive off-road there are much better and cheaper cars for it than Range Rovers.  If you want to drive on-road there are much better and cheaper cars for it than Range Rovers.  If you want to drive on icy roads there are much MUCH better and cheaper cars for it than Range Rovers.  Frequently these are all the same cars.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> If you want to drive off-road there are much better and cheaper cars for it than Range Rovers.  If you want to drive on-road there are much better and cheaper cars for it than Range Rovers.  If you want to drive on icy roads there are much MUCH better and cheaper cars for it than Range Rovers.  Frequently these are all the same cars.


X5?


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> X5?


No.  None of the wankermobiles.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> No.  None of the wankermobiles.


So what do you suggest is a good vehicle for driving off-road in snow, on the motorway and on sand?


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> So what do you suggest is a good vehicle for driving off-road in snow, on the motorway and on sand?


For a start, I’d rather have my Yeti than a Range Rover.  And fully specced it cost £20k new (albeit 9 years ago now), versus how much for a low-end Range Rover sport?


----------



## dessiato (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> For a start, I’d rather have my Yeti than a Range Rover.  And fully specced it cost £20k new (albeit 9 years ago now), versus how much for a low-end Range Rover sport?


Even Jeremy Clarkson liked those. How is it off road?


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> No.  None of the wankermobiles.


He’s trolling.

Bimble’s 4wd thread is the one to pick if he’s serious. Or plenty of others. Why else pick the only thread on the boards that's specifically about how shit Range Rovers are and the dicks that own them to say 'I'm thinking of buying a Range Rover'?!


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Even Jeremy Clarkson liked those. How is it off road?


It's a 4x4 vehicle.  It has an "off-road" button -- you push it then the computer does various things.  In the ice, it basically drives itself -- just steer.  In the mud, it sorts out how much power to each wheel etc.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 20, 2020)

All RR sports are low end


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> So what do you suggest is a good vehicle for driving off-road in snow, on the motorway and on sand?



2006+ Mitsubishi Pajero

2009+ Land Cruiser  (J150)

Petrol auto to be preferred.


----------



## kebabking (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> So what do you suggest is a good vehicle for driving off-road in snow, on the motorway and on sand?



The most off-road capable are the Nissan Pathfinder or Patrol, Toyota Land cruiser, Mitsubishi Shogun. I regularly drive my Pathfinder on 300 mile motorway trips at 80mph and find it very comfortable. Its fantastic for 2 week camping trips to the Alps with 3 kids. It does however, as all the vehicles in this class do, burn fuel.

Something like an Outlander will do all the off-road stuff you need, be comfortable on long road trips and burn a lot less fuel.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I’ve driven in deep snow, mud, and beaches. What you say is true, to a point, but a 4x4 will do it better than a cheap hatchback, even with winter tyres.



And almost any 4x4 will do it better than a range rover. Toyota Land Cruiser has been the official benchmark for a long time but there must be at least ten other cars that are as good in terms of quality and reliability in that class.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 20, 2020)

kebabking said:


> The most off-road capable are the Nissan Pathfinder or Patrol, Toyota Land cruiser, Mitsubishi Shogun. I regularly drive my Pathfinder on 300 mile motorway trips at 80mph and find it very comfortable. Its fantastic for 2 week camping trips to the Alps with 3 kids. It does however, as all the vehicles in this class do, burn fuel.
> 
> Something like an Outlander will do all the off-road stuff you need, be comfortable on long road trips and burn a lot less fuel.



Someone I know has the PHEV Outlander and it seems really nice. Also like many Hyrbids it's nipper then it's specs might suggest. Also eerie how quite it is on full electric mode.


----------



## T & P (Jan 20, 2020)

I have no problems with the car model itself, but look at the fucking state of this...







I'm tempted to email the image to Mercedes-Benz. I reckon they might try to forcibly repossess the car.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> 2006+ Mitsubishi Pajero



Des lives in Iberia, so he should definitely drive around with Pajero written on the back of his car


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> X5?



All your audis, bmws, porsche cayennes etc are just volkswagens with a different badge. A badge you're paying an extra 5-10 grand for. And which will make passers by think you're a knob.


----------



## Griff (Jan 20, 2020)

SpookyFrank, BMW aren't part of the Volkswagen Audi Group.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> X5?



Not terrific when the off road going gets really rough because of relatively shallow exit/entry angles and wading depth compared to the RR Sport. You can fix that with aftermarket bits though.

They do have by far  the best powertrains in the class though. The 3.0 petrol double-vanos turbo is the sweet spot, unless you're going to be towing. It has a lot of interesting tech in it including a mechanical fuel pump and the intercooler inside the intake plenum.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 20, 2020)

Griff said:


> SpookyFrank, BMW aren't part of the Volkswagen Audi Group.



Mercedes, audi and BMW are all the same. Ordinary cars with a premium badge on them to appeal to pathetic halfwits.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Mercedes, audi and BMW are all the same. Ordinary cars with a premium badge on them to appeal to pathetic halfwits.



You ever driven one Frank?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 20, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> You ever driven one Frank?



No I always prefer to drive something with indicators.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> No I always prefer to drive something with indicators.



You should give it a go, find out why these halfwits towards whom you feel pathos are happy to splurge more than twice the average UK pre-tax income on an ordinary car with a fancy-pants badge...


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

In the modern world, it’s increasingly unclear what a “premium” marque really means.  The technology is shared, the manufacturing process of all companies is to tolerances of less than a micrometer, they’re all broadly as reliable as each other (except for Jaguar Land Rover, who are worse rather than better).  You don’t even get better dealer service these days. It seems increasingly to just be a competition about who can make the plushest interior.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> In the modern world, it’s increasingly unclear what a “premium” marque really means.  The technology is shared, the manufacturing process of all companies is to tolerances of less than a micrometer, they’re all broadly as reliable as each other (except for Jaguar Land Rover, who are worse rather than better).  You don’t even get better dealer service these days. It seems increasingly to just be a competition about who can make the plushest interior.



My best mate has the Seat version of our car, we have driven each other’s cars and by god you can tell the difference. Whether that difference is worth the extra £’s the Audi costs over the Seat I guess depends on how much spare money you have.


----------



## Griff (Jan 20, 2020)

Never been a Mercedes fan, but there is so much want for this:

Mercedes 300SEL 6.3

Proper German engineering.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

Griff said:


> Never been a Mercedes fan, but there is so much want for this:
> 
> Mercedes 300SEL 6.3
> 
> Proper German engineering.



It’s a looker and immaculate, but will drive like shite.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 20, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It’s a looker and immaculate, but will drive like shite.


Certainly by today's standards.


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> My best mate has the Seat version of our car, we have driven each other’s cars and by god you can tell the difference. Whether that difference is worth the extra £’s the Audi costs over the Seat I guess depends on how much spare money you have.


What do you find the difference to be?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> What do you find the difference to be?



Everything feels more solid. I know the metal is the same thickness and that they tune the sound the doors make when they close and so on, but the way it feels on the road feels more solid. Dunno why, can’t describe much more than that, I’m not really Clarkson... Also it has more toys and that. And ultimately on a long journey I arrive feeling less tired than when I did the same in ‘lesser’ cars that I used to own. Add to that the feel of the materials used in the cabin and, to me, it feels worth it. I feel a Bentley or that level of car is as much a waste of dough as a Seat owner thinks an Audi is though, so it seems that these things are relative.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jan 20, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Mercedes, audi and BMW are all the same. Ordinary cars with a premium badge on them to appeal to pathetic halfwits.


I doubt you're their target audience, Frank.


----------



## Spymaster (Jan 20, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I doubt you're their target audience, Frank.


If he's right about them being built to appeal to pathetic halfwits, he's precisely their target audience.


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Everything feels more solid. I know the metal is the same thickness and that they tune the sound the doors make when they close and so on, but the way it feels on the road feels more solid. Dunno why, can’t describe much more than that, I’m not really Clarkson... Also it has more toys and that. And ultimately on a long journey I arrive feeling less tired than when I did the same in ‘lesser’ cars that I used to own. Add to that the feel of the materials used in the cabin and, to me, it feels worth it. I feel a Bentley or that level of car is as much a waste of dough as a Seat owner thinks an Audi is though, so it seems that these things are relative.


Most of what you’ve said there (possibly even all) is referring precisely to the “plushness of the cabin” I mentioned above as being the last meaningful difference between marques.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> Most of what you’ve said there (possibly even all) is referring precisely to the “plushness of the cabin” I mentioned above as being the last meaningful difference between marques.



So?

And plushness of the cabin doesn’t account for how solid it feels on the road, which was my first point.


----------



## kabbes (Jan 20, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> So?
> 
> And plushness of the cabin doesn’t account for how solid it feels on the road, which was my first point.


It kind of does, though.  It’s all about how it’s transmitted to you in the cabin.

it’s fine to feel that the plushness is worth the money.  But it’s different to the old days, where the actual mechanics were better in more expensive cars


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 20, 2020)

kabbes said:


> It kind of does, though.  It’s all about how it’s transmitted to you in the cabin.



Obviously, that’s where I experience my car. But handling etc., dunno, it’s nice, you’re welcome to come and have a thrape if you want.

And maybe back in the day pricier cars had better reliability, I don’t really remember, or have any benchmark as no one had a flash motor (though my dad did once look after a customer’s Ferrari for a week and it had 180mph on the speedo. My car has  that too, I can fit a fridge-freezer in mine...)


----------



## nogojones (Jan 20, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> My car has  that too, I can fit a fridge-freezer in mine...)


Keeps your beers nice and cold


----------



## A380 (Jan 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> So what do you suggest is a good vehicle for driving off-road in snow, on the motorway and on sand?



Somebody elses


----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 22, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Jan 22, 2020)

That’s nothing...



Part Scorpion tank apparently. 




__





						Making Tracks | McDonald Landrover Blog
					





					www.mcdonald4x4.co.uk


----------



## kebabking (Jan 22, 2020)

dessiato said:


> That’s nothing...
> 
> View attachment 196357
> 
> ...



Christ, the unholy bastard love-child of a Landy and a Scorpion - the RAC's share price must double every time a picture of it appears on the internet!


----------



## hash tag (Jan 30, 2020)

50 years  
Fifty years of luxury 4WD: Range Rover’s anniversary to be marked at The London Classic Car Show - The London Classic Car Show


----------



## dylanredefined (Jan 30, 2020)

dessiato said:


> That’s nothing...
> 
> View attachment 196357
> 
> ...





Could have done with that last weekend drove into puddle didnt drive out
Oh well recovery a stuck landy is part of the training objectives.


----------



## Marty1 (Feb 15, 2020)

This bloke in his Range Rover certainly helped perpetuate the notion that drives of such vehicles are a tad entitled.

Parks with his backside over the bay behind him then pulled away as a learner driver was about to pass him causing her to slam the brakes on (or possibly the instructor throwing the brakes on) - to which the Range Rover guy waving his hand (like the royals do when waving to their public subjects) before then slowing down whilst looking disapprovingly at the learner driver in his side mirror for daring to honk him!


----------



## strung out (Feb 15, 2020)

Range Rover drivers have the fucking worst private number plates too.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 15, 2020)

more
keying
needed


----------



## sleaterkinney (Apr 24, 2020)

editor in his new car. Pulled over for no numberplate.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 24, 2020)

Why do some range rovers say 'overfinch' on them?


----------



## editor (Apr 24, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Why do some range rovers say 'overfinch' on them?


"_Overfinch_ is the ultimate expression of the Range Rover icon" = ultimate twat





__





						Overfinch - The Ultimate Expression of the Range Rover Icon
					

Overfinch. Since 1975 we have been redefining Land Rover models, creating bespoke vehicles that are innovative and spectacular.




					www.overfinch.com


----------



## High Voltage (Apr 24, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Why do some range rovers say 'overfinch' on them?



It's for people who don't think a 'standard' RR is expensive enough so they get an Overfinch "tarted up" one instead


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 24, 2020)

See also Kahn, Onyx, Urban (as here) among others.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 24, 2020)

bellends.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 24, 2020)

sleaterkinney said:


> editor in his new car. Pulled over for no numberplate.
> 
> View attachment 208599




what type of distopian hell hole do these people live in, that requires a multi litre white pumped _unreliable_ giant 4x4 with the glowing reputation of being the most keyabable car in the known universe ?


----------



## hash tag (Apr 24, 2020)

White and pimped is all the rage is some parts of the middle east I gather


----------



## kebabking (Apr 24, 2020)

hash tag said:


> White and pimped is all the rage is some parts of the middle east I gather



You're going to get into trouble for that...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 24, 2020)

kebabking said:


> You're going to get into trouble for that...



Nice to be reminded that I haven’t been wholly corrupted, I didn’t see that


----------



## hash tag (Apr 24, 2020)

I know this is Park Lane, but pretty typical, I imagine


----------



## DownwardDog (Apr 25, 2020)

High Voltage said:


> It's for people who don't think a 'standard' RR is expensive enough so they get an Overfinch "tarted up" one instead



There was a point to them when you could only get the Series 1 RR with the asthmatic 3.5 V8 so Overfinch were doing 5.3 small block Chev conversions and adding ABS.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 25, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> There was a point to them when you could only get the Series 1 RR with the asthmatic 3.5 V8 so Overfinch were doing 5.3 small block Chev conversions and adding ABS.


What point would that be?


----------



## dylanredefined (Apr 25, 2020)

has



[QUOTE="not-bono-ever said:


> what type of distopian hell hole do these people live in, that requires a multi litre white pumped _unreliable_ giant 4x4 with the glowing reputation of being the most keyabable car in the known universe ?


In Iraq the pmcs drove white GMC
surburbans and the locals loved blowing them up.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Apr 25, 2020)

Have we done this one yet? 2 million and it's based on a Ford.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 25, 2020)

Any takers at 300K? "This underwhelming first attempt at an off-roader" 








						3k Mile 1990 Lamborghini LM002 “LM/American” ($309,900)
					

A 3k-mile, one owner 'Rambo Lambo' with the glorious Lamborghini V12.




					petrolicious.com


----------



## dessiato (Apr 25, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Any takers at 300K? "This underwhelming first attempt at an off-roader"
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I‘d think about it, but the Appia They’ve got for sale appeals more.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 25, 2020)

No way, its truly foul - so much so even the American army rejected it!


----------



## Sweet FA (Apr 25, 2020)

This pulled up outside the offy a couple of days ago. It looked pretty cool but totally out of place. The old bloke who was driving it looked quite embarrassed when he got out.


----------



## DownwardDog (Apr 25, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Any takers at 300K? "This underwhelming first attempt at an off-roader"
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Rock solid investment. They will be 1m+ soon enough.


----------



## likesfish (Apr 25, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Any takers at 300K? "This underwhelming first attempt at an off-roader"
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 That was actually meant to be replacement for military vehicles like a landy 140mph cross country!
Till it broke anyways 😅. Completely and utterly impractical Saudi brought a load and Gaddafi had one the US military couldn't afford them.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 25, 2020)

Sweet FA said:


> This pulled up outside the offy a couple of days ago. It looked pretty cool but totally out of place. The old bloke who was driving it looked quite embarrassed when he got out.
> 
> View attachment 208805



If I won the lotto I’d get one.


----------



## T & P (Apr 27, 2020)

Sweet FA said:


> This pulled up outside the offy a couple of days ago. It looked pretty cool but totally out of place. The old bloke who was driving it looked quite embarrassed when he got out.
> 
> View attachment 208805


That's the most modest and discreet modern Lamborghini model I have ever seen, actually. If the driver was embarrassed by it he would be moritified to drive any of the other models in their portfolio


----------



## dylanredefined (Apr 30, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> If I won the lotto I’d get one.


It's a Lamborghini you can do the school run in


----------



## hash tag (Apr 30, 2020)

Surely, if you could afford a lambo you would not be doing the school run


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 30, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Surely, if you could afford a lambo you would not be doing the school run



Girl in BB1’s class, her dad has an Aventador. But they live very much within walking distance of the school...


----------



## hash tag (Apr 30, 2020)

But that's a job for one of the servants.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 30, 2020)

hash tag said:


> But that's a job for one of the servants.



They live in a Victorian semi. Tbf the bright blue car looks fucking ridiculous on their drive.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 30, 2020)

Oh how frightful. Is it a local authority property, I wonder.
No taste some people.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 30, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Oh how frightful. Is it a local authority property, I wonder.
> No taste some people.



No, her dad owns it and I doubt it has ever been local authority owned. A house from 1880 with a bright blue car from 2090 on the drive _is_ frightful. Still no worse than the kind of yank tank you’d stick out there if you had the chance though.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 30, 2020)

I can remember visiting the tip at New Addington (large estate) a few times. I remember going past a modest house that frequently Had a variety of cars on the front drive; big audi and big BMW I seem to remember...all the cars were less than 18 months old.


----------



## likesfish (May 1, 2020)

There was a  normal house on sheppy with a lambo hurrican outside which was a bit odd.
But buying a normal looking lambo rather defeats the point of buying a lambo


----------



## rubbershoes (May 1, 2020)

hash tag said:


> I can remember visiting the tip at New Addington (large estate) a few times. I remember going past a modest house that frequently Had a variety of cars on the front drive; big audi and big BMW I seem to remember...all the cars were less than 18 months old.



Could well be a car dealer


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 1, 2020)

likesfish said:


> There was a  normal house on sheppy with a lambo hurrican outside which was a bit odd.
> But buying a normal looking lambo rather defeats the point of buying a lambo


It really doesnt. It's no different to buying a flash version. If anything, it makes you more of a poser, because you're saying to people 'hey, look at me, I own a Lamborghini that's pretending not to be one, so I'm better than those Saudi sheep.


----------



## MickiQ (May 1, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> No, her dad owns it and I doubt it has ever been local authority owned. A house from 1880 with a bright blue car from 2090 on the drive _is_ frightful. Still no worse than the kind of yank tank you’d stick out there if you had the chance though.


I have to confess I had to google what an Aventador was


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 1, 2020)

MickiQ said:


> I have to confess I had to google what an Aventador was



Picture it being electric blue and see how it blends in so well with the setting...


----------



## dessiato (May 1, 2020)

This is my favourite Lambo. Wish I still had it.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 1, 2020)

I think the ultimate Lambo would be a second gen Gallardo - something like a manual LP550-2. NA 5.2 V10 and 6 speed gated transmission. We'll never see their like again.

I have had two Countachs (one never ran and I parted it out) and 2wd converted Murcielago and there is something magical about them that transcends their actual capabilities. A 911 Turbo is objectively a superior car and Ferraris are better built but there is just something about the raging bull...


----------



## hash tag (May 1, 2020)

rubbershoes said:


> Could well be a car dealer


More likely a drug dealer. I checked out what I thought was the address on street view last night just to see what was parked out side...the house was blurred out! This is a road which is mainly very bland ex local authority semis


----------



## hash tag (May 6, 2020)

Ere, guvnor
 wanna new range Rover?


			The £35m car park: In a picture symbolising the economic crisis gripping Britain, an old RAF airbase is packed with new cars that nobody wants


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 6, 2020)

rusting like lancias


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 6, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> rusting like lancias


Most likely, and hopefully.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 6, 2020)

Saw my first ever Rolls Royce Cullinan in the flesh earlier, jeepers it is fugly. At first I thought I was following a hearse. I'm sure it's a nice place to sit, but its main purpose seems to be to tell everyone that you've got loads-a-money.


----------



## kebabking (May 6, 2020)

Or, perhaps more likely, that you've told the finance company that you've got loads of money...


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 6, 2020)

its gopping


----------



## hash tag (May 6, 2020)

The range rover, but not as we know it, has just turned 50. An instant success.








						Range Rover - Wikipedia
					






					en.m.wikipedia.org


----------



## discokermit (May 6, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Any takers at 300K? "This underwhelming first attempt at an off-roader"
> 
> 
> 
> ...




i welded a patch in a wheel arch of one of these for a garage in south wimbledon, next door to the fabshop where i worked. did it in my dinner break, took ten minutes, everything was all set up for me. couple of days later, their receptionist/aunty, dolly, came round to ours and gave me sixty quid. i said i cant take that, it was a favour, she insisted, i said it was way too much and to give me a tenner, she said they had charged the bloke a fortune and i was entitled to my  cut.
i spent it on drugs. thank you rich tasteless wimbledonian.


----------



## hash tag (May 9, 2020)

During lockdown, person in Essex goes shopping and whoops


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2020)

Just as motorcycle licences are staged based on the engine size and power, there should be at the very least some kind of compulsory performance driving course for drivers who buy or hire a ‘super sports’ car for the first time, regardless of many years they’ve held a driving licence.

 I’m surprised supercar hire companies don’t insist on even a basic one-day track induction course before one is allowed to drive off for the weekend in a Lambo. But I guess an Amex Centurion card is all the qualifications they need to see...


----------



## hash tag (May 12, 2020)

The lambo was owned By a partner. I suspect the driver either wanted to take a short cut or do a bit of off roading.


----------



## dessiato (May 12, 2020)

T & P said:


> Just as motorcycle licences are staged based on the engine size and power, there should be at the very least some kind of compulsory performance driving course for drivers who buy or hire a ‘super sports’ car for the first time, regardless of many years they’ve held a driving licence.
> 
> I’m surprised supercar hire companies don’t insist on even a basic one-day track induction course before one is allowed to drive off for the weekend in a Lambo. But I guess an Amex Centurion card is all the qualifications they need to see...


I've been driving since I was 5, on fields obviously. I've done the advanced driving, and police driving courses. I've done single seater and rally driving. I'd like to think I'm a competent driver, but driving a supercar is whole different kettle of fish. I think I would struggle to get the best from one, safely. There's no way most people are capable of handling one.


----------



## T & P (May 12, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I've been driving since I was 5, on fields obviously. I've done the advanced driving, and police driving courses. I've done single seater and rally driving. I'd like to think I'm a competent driver, but driving a supercar is whole different kettle of fish. I think I would struggle to get the best from one, safely. There's no way most people are capable of handling one.


Well, I reckon it is perfectly doable to drive one for a weekend without previous training and do so safely and without incident even after putting your foot down a bit. But so long as one has the simple wits to work out that the acceleration/ torque available is beyond anything they would have experienced before, and very difficult to control in most circumstances.

As countless YouTube videos show, a lot of supercar crashes seem to happen on city streets from a dead stop start, when some twat accelerates too much to impress onlookers, and the car tailspins. Or at relative low speeds through bendy roads, again when the driver fancies himself as Ayton Senna coming out of a bend in Monaco and accelerates too much. If one keeps a cool head and limits himself to _gently_ pushing down the pedal a bit along a motorway straight stretch, a 500hp supercar should be perfectly manageable.

But then I guess the type of folk willing to spend a grand to hire a Batmobile for the weekend is usually not abundant in restraint and common sense.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 24, 2020)

A new apex... stretched and convertible Y62 Nissan Patrol.


----------



## dessiato (May 24, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> A new apex... stretched and convertible Y62 Nissan Patrol.


A great wedding car though.


----------



## Athos (May 24, 2020)

dessiato said:


> ... I'm a competent driver, but driving a supercar is whole different kettle of fish. I think I would struggle to get the best from one, safely.



There's no public road on which it'd be safe to get anything like the best from a supercar. That should be saved for a track day.  On the road, it's more fun to drive a slower car nearer its limits than to drive a fast car at a fraction if its potential (leaving aside poseur points).


----------



## A380 (May 24, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> A new apex... stretched and convertible Y62 Nissan Patrol.


The Pope's standards have dropped recently...


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 27, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> View attachment 214402



Disco Sport, the wanky little brother to the RR Sport.


----------



## T & P (May 27, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Disco Sport, the wanky little brother to the RR Sport.


Worse in many ways. Like someone who actually wants to be a full-time cunt, but can't afford it.


----------



## BassJunkie (May 27, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Saw my first ever Rolls Royce Cullinan in the flesh earlier, jeepers it is fugly. At first I thought I was following a hearse. I'm sure it's a nice place to sit, but its main purpose seems to be to tell everyone that you've got loads-a-money.


What an abomination! They're making a fucking SUV!?! This is surely the end times! Before we know it Jaguar will be making estate cars, or, God Forbid! Diesel cars!


----------



## A380 (May 27, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> View attachment 214402


Frankly I’m surprised he got from London to Durham without The car breaking down.


----------



## Spymaster (May 27, 2020)

Athos said:


> On the road, it's more fun to drive a slower car nearer its limits than to drive a fast car at a fraction if its potential ...


----------



## dessiato (May 27, 2020)

BassJunkie said:


> What an abomination! They're making a fucking SUV!?! This is surely the end times! Before we know it Jaguar will be making estate cars, or, God Forbid! Diesel cars!


Aston Martin DBX


----------



## Spymaster (May 27, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Aston Martin DBX
> 
> View attachment 215016



One of these stopped beside me at Marble Arch last week



I think the woman driving it actually clocked me laughing.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (May 27, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Aston Martin DBX
> 
> View attachment 215016


I quite like that


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 27, 2020)

Spymaster said:


> One of these stopped beside me at Marble Arch last week
> 
> View attachment 215018
> 
> I think the woman driving it actually clocked me laughing.



Think we’ve already been there; don’t fill it with kids and/or dogs, drive it carefully and it will only go up in price...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 27, 2020)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> I quite like that



It’s a Cayenne that costs twice as much and will break down. What’s not to like?


----------



## Marty1 (May 27, 2020)

Don’t know how Jaguar Land Rover are losing money - there’s absolutely loads of Range Rovers on the road.


----------



## T & P (May 28, 2020)

I really don't understand the ongoing popularity of SUV-bodied cars not only in the premium car segment, but across the entire industry. They're not even particularly spacious ffs. Other than an elevated driving position they offer no practical advantage in most cases, seeing a lot of them don't even pretend anymore to be designed or optimised for any off-road use.

For all the out-of-favour estate cars appear to have become over the years, most families would be far better served with one than with any SUV out there. And at the performance end of the range, I suspect even the likes of the Focus ST Estate would leave most non-premium SUVs in their wake with ease.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 28, 2020)

T & P said:


> I really don't understand the ongoing popularity of SUV-bodied cars not only in the premium car segment, but across the entire industry. They're not even particularly spacious ffs. Other than an elevated driving position they offer no practical advantage in most cases, seeing a lot of them don't even pretend anymore to be designed or optimised for any off-road use.
> 
> For all the out-of-favour estate cars appear to have become over the years, most families would be far better served with one than with any SUV out there. And at the performance end of the range, I suspect even the likes of the Focus ST Estate would leave most non-premium SUVs in their wake with ease.



We got given a Merc SUV over Christmas when someone twatted our motor. The elevated driving position was very nice indeed, also as you get on in years that makes it easier to get in and out of. But it fucking guzzled the juice, was really sluggish and in spite of being the size of a small moon was no more spacious in the cabin than our estate car and the boot was smaller.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 28, 2020)

Oh and a neighbour across the way came over to say he didn’t like my choice of car. Even though our actual car is an Audi no one has ever said that before!


----------



## strung out (May 28, 2020)

We hired a Hyundai Santa Fe SUV to drive across Nevada, Arizona and California a couple of years back. Thought I was a right billy big bollocks until I got on the roads and found it was one of the smallest cars around compared to everyone else's.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 28, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Don’t know how Jaguar Land Rover are losing money - there’s absolutely loads of Range Rovers on the road.



They have no economies of scale from being part of a larger group with a wider range of products.


----------



## kebabking (May 28, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Don’t know how Jaguar Land Rover are losing money - there’s absolutely loads of Range Rovers on the road.



Dead easy - there are four times as many BMW's on the road (or on the hardshoulder...) As JLR's, but it costs the same to develop a RRS, indeed more, as an X5.


----------



## Marty1 (May 28, 2020)

strung out said:


> We hired a Hyundai Santa Fe SUV to drive across Nevada, Arizona and California a couple of years back. Thought I was a right billy big bollocks until I got on the roads and found it was one of the smallest cars around compared to everyone else's.
> 
> View attachment 215080



That’s what my gf drives tho an older model (approx 10 yrs old).

She was going to buy a new X5 at the time but the 7 seater version couldn’t fit two grown adults in the back 2 seats, plus the Santa Fe was about half the cost.

Her’s is still going strong from new - 2.2 litre diesel engine, 198bhp auto, big leather heated seats etc and 4wd if you need it.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 29, 2020)

kebabking said:


> Dead easy - there are four times as many BMW's on the road (or on the hardshoulder...) As JLR's, but it costs the same to develop a RRS, indeed more, as an X5.



It is no coincidence that the other British OEMs who are struggling (Aston, McLaren) are also subscale.


----------



## editor (Jun 17, 2020)

Now they're advertising how brilliant it is at going over speed bumps


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Jun 17, 2020)

Still has to go over at an angle, so not even good at doing what it's designed for.


----------



## A380 (Jun 17, 2020)

Adverts in the papers today about it being the 50th anniversary of the launch of the Range Rover today.  I knew the 70s were crap...


----------



## hash tag (Jun 19, 2020)

Won't get no satisfaction in one of these 








						Range Rover Velar named in survey as Britain’s 'least satisfying' new car
					

A survey of 43,000 car buyers carried out by Which? found buyers moaned about the Range Rover Velar's electrical faults, poor rear visibility and “iffy reliability”




					www.mirror.co.uk


----------



## T & P (Jun 19, 2020)

Those poor owners....


----------



## mx wcfc (Jun 25, 2020)

Oh dear, what a shame, never mind.









						M1 crash: Lamborghini wrecked after 20 minutes
					

Police said the sports car was hit after stopping on the M1 because of "mechanical failure".



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## hash tag (Jun 25, 2020)

20 minutes on the road and it broke down
 teach you not to buy a Japanese rot box that goes on....forever


----------



## Detroit City (Jun 25, 2020)

I saw a Range Rover Evoque (?) yesterday.  It was a convertible and beautiful


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jun 25, 2020)

Post ^^^reported. I urge others to do the same


----------



## hash tag (Jun 25, 2020)

Oh the irony.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jun 25, 2020)

hash tag said:


> 20 minutes on the road and it broke down
> teach you not to buy a Japanese rot box that goes on....forever




Yeah, what sort of twat buys Italian cars???










for the purposes of this post Lamborghinis are not glorified Audis...


----------



## hash tag (Jul 4, 2020)

Classy


----------



## kabbes (Jul 5, 2020)

hash tag said:


> ClassyView attachment 220819


That’s like a very droll joke.  Maybe the owner has a finely developed sense of irony and a real commitment to humour.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 5, 2020)

A new challenger appears... Ineos Grenadier built the company owned by that massive twat.






It looks like a Chinese copy of a Defender and has BMW powertrain that would be much better enjoyed in a BMW.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 5, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> A new challenger appears... Ineos Grenadier built the company owned by that massive twat.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Well they've got to do something to create losses for tax purposes now fracking has been kiboshed.


----------



## dessiato (Jul 5, 2020)

kabbes said:


> That’s like a very droll joke.  Maybe the owner has a finely developed sense of irony and a real commitment to humour.


Or the air suspension is fucked.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 5, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Or the air suspension is fucked.



#stancenation


----------



## CNT36 (Jul 5, 2020)

editor said:


> Now they're advertising how brilliant it is at going over speed bumps



They're terrible going over speed bumps. Sport is slightly better. In an old style discovery it felt like you'd probably killed something.


----------



## dessiato (Jul 5, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> #stancenation


I like that


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 5, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> #stancenation


Wow


----------



## hash tag (Jul 5, 2020)

first question was is that for real and second why?


----------



## hash tag (Aug 1, 2020)

Bentley Bentayga gets Akrapovic exhaust option
					

No, really: new extras include scatter cushions, Bentley golf bags... and a set of Slovenia's finest titanium tail pipes




					www.pistonheads.com
				




"scatter cushions"  
  "Specific accessories include a Relaxation Pack with scatter cushions and additional footrests, a Bentley Cycle Carrier and a new range of car covers. Bentley will even fit your Bentayga with mud flaps "

BTW, if interested, they have a sale on at the moment Last chance to buy


----------



## nogojones (Aug 1, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Bentley Bentayga gets Akrapovic exhaust option
> 
> 
> No, really: new extras include scatter cushions, Bentley golf bags... and a set of Slovenia's finest titanium tail pipes
> ...


Hmmmmn.  Looks like we're gonna need a bigger potato


----------



## DownwardDog (Aug 8, 2020)

dessiato said:


> A great wedding car though.



Especially in Hartlepool. You could get all of the bride's kids in it.


----------



## kebabking (Aug 8, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> Especially in Hartlepool. You could get all of the bride's kids in it.



You are _so _going to get into trouble for that....


----------



## A380 (Aug 9, 2020)

Spymaster said:


> One of these stopped beside me at Marble Arch last week
> 
> View attachment 215018
> 
> I think the woman driving it actually clocked me laughing.



Missed this when you posted it. Wasn’t this some kind of near scam AM used to reduce the average emissions levels of their new cars to meet a required target? I think they ‘made’ a 100 or so to drop the average emmisions of new cars made that year? Or similar iffy carbon accounting...


----------



## T & P (Sep 7, 2020)

Unfortunately I was on my bike and naturally couldn't take a picture, but earlier today I crossed paths in Chelsea with a Porsche 911 painted in purple. I'm talking Tinky Winky-grade purple here.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 8, 2020)

T & P said:


> Unfortunately I was on my bike and naturally couldn't take a picture, but earlier today I crossed paths in Chelsea with a Porsche 911 painted in purple. I'm talking Tinky Winky-grade purple here.



Ultraviolet was an extra cost option on the 911 for the 991 generation. The GT3 RS was fire.


----------



## dylanredefined (Sep 8, 2020)

T & P said:


> Unfortunately I was on my bike and naturally couldn't take a picture, but earlier today I crossed paths in Chelsea with a Porsche 911 painted in purple. I'm talking Tinky Winky-grade purple here.


 "Nice car don't like the colour"
 "What colour is your porsche?"
  Is the reason for that. If I ever became rich would look at some hideous coloured super car and then the wife would tell me to grow up.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 23, 2020)

maybe more suited to bangers chat but its a RR, 3k work for a tons worth of parts. and its still a decade old RR at the end of the day. wretched miserable vehicles.

car wizard is very good viewing if you are into mechanicals btw


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 23, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> #stancenation



that should be driven to waste ground and set on fire


----------



## Marty1 (Sep 26, 2020)

Land Rover & Tesla top the list of most unreliable cars:









						The two least reliable car brands, plus why you should avoid a luxury car if you want good reliability - Which? News
					

The latest Which? Car survey results are in - find out which manufacturers let their customers down the most




					www.which.co.uk
				




Pretty shocking considering both brands don’t sell cheap motors.


----------



## Elpenor (Sep 26, 2020)

Just seen this thread, a while ago I saw a Range Rover Sport which had customised the raised lettering they have at the rear of the vehicle to say “The Duchess”... classy!


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 26, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Land Rover & Tesla too the list of most unreliable cars:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Expensive doesn't always equate to reliable. Sometimes it's quite the opposite. Take motorbikes... Harley, Ducati, BMW. The most expensive yet least reliable bikes you can buy.
I think some people like unreliable motors. They seem to like talking about how much they cost to keep on the road.


----------



## ska invita (Sep 29, 2020)




----------



## hash tag (Oct 18, 2020)

From this mornings walk was this tasteful little number


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Oct 18, 2020)

hash tag said:


> From this mornings walk was this tasteful little number


Christ all fucking mighty


----------



## hash tag (Oct 18, 2020)

Who said money cant buy taste? 😁


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 18, 2020)

Even when they produce new stuff it looks utterly gopping. It’s like they are stealing design ideas from Dacia and Skoda and jeep ffs , putting in pants motors and asking 3 times as much . What type of mug buys this awful shite  ?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 18, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> Even when they produce new stuff it looks utterly gopping. It’s like they are stealing design ideas from Dacia and Skoda and jeep ffs , putting in pants motors and asking 3 times as much . What type of mug buys this awful shite  ?
> View attachment 234977



Jeep has never done anything that ugly. What's with the fucking sideburns?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 18, 2020)

Fucking bull bars on it. Why? Why? The Aussies need them on the farms but wouldn’t go near RR LR shite


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 18, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> Fucking bull bars on it. Why? Why? The Aussies need them on the farms but wouldn’t go near RR LR shite



They probably don't count as bull bars (which are banned IIRC) because they're part of the bodywork. I think the proper technical term is a 'child-mangler'.


----------



## Rosemary Jest (Oct 18, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> What type of mug buys this awful shite  ?
> View attachment 234977



Tory dickheads.

Or the 'Aspirational'.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 18, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> Even when they produce new stuff it looks utterly gopping. It’s like they are stealing design ideas from Dacia and Skoda and jeep ffs , putting in pants motors and asking 3 times as much . What type of mug buys this awful shite  ?
> View attachment 234977



Not anyone who needs a vehicle that is serious off road. It’s just fashion fluff, but massively shite. Will sell like hot cakes.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Oct 18, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Jeep has never done anything that ugly. What's with the fucking sideburns?


Most likely a snorkel.


----------



## teuchter (Oct 19, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> What type of mug buys this awful shite  ?


I can think of a few regular urban75 posters who would. I expect most people will know who they are.


----------



## DownwardDog (Oct 19, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Jeep has never done anything that ugly.


----------



## nogojones (Oct 19, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


>


That looks quite sweet - in the way little frogs do


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 12, 2020)

BMW iX electric SUV.






I do like the 'double denim' interior.


----------



## dessiato (Nov 12, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> BMW iX electric SUV.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


That is fucking ugly.


----------



## kebabking (Nov 12, 2020)

Can you put a fridge in the boot?

No - hairdressers wagon....


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 12, 2020)

kebabking said:


> Can you put a fridge in the boot?
> 
> No - hairdressers wagon....



As a lover of big estate cars, one thing that suprises me about some SUVs is how small storage is relative to the size of the thing.


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 12, 2020)

Why are you driving around with fridges in your cars? I don't think I have ever needed to do that.


----------



## kebabking (Nov 12, 2020)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> As a lover of big estate cars, one thing that suprises me about some SUVs is hpw small storage is relative to the size of the thing.



Even the 'bigger' SUV's like an Evoque (spit) have a bot little bigger than something like a Honda jazz.

Useless things.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 12, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> Why are you driving around with fridges in your cars? I don't think I have ever needed to do that.



Just going away with dog to a cottage in Scotland for a week seems to do it these days. 

Once upon a time I went around the world with a ruck sack.


----------



## kebabking (Nov 12, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> Why are you driving around with fridges in your cars? I don't think I have ever needed to do that.



Baseline practicality for a 'big' car.


----------



## dessiato (Nov 12, 2020)

kebabking said:


> Baseline practicality for a 'big' car.


You should transport a fridge upright. That’d need to be a tall car! So a better guide would be a four draw upright filing cabinet laid horizontally.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 12, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> Why are you driving around with fridges in your cars? I don't think I have ever needed to do that.



I picked up a fridge from one of my mum’s mates soon after getting my first estate car and it is still going strong in the basement as an overflow fridge/freezer, very handy thing to have.

But that BMW, looks like someone has stuck a shitty finger under its nose, same as Tracey Emin.


----------



## A380 (Nov 12, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> BMW iX electric SUV.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I never thought I’d a cutting edge BMW channeling the Austin Allegro steering wheel so much. Perhaps it’s after the success of new mini?


----------



## T & P (Nov 12, 2020)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> As a lover of big estate cars, one thing that suprises me about some SUVs is how small storage is relative to the size of the thing.


And rear passenger space/ legroom can be astonishingly underwhelming as well. Other than a more generous headroom, we're talking Golf/ Ford Focus levels of legroom in many cases. I guess SUVs might be wider so if you're carrying three adults at the back they might notice a difference. But I doubt two at the back would.

My boss owns a BMW X5 and I often think how it doesn't look any bigger at the back than the Golfs I hire from Zipcar, other than the ceiling height.


----------



## nogojones (Nov 12, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> Why are you driving around with fridges in your cars? I don't think I have ever needed to do that.


I took my fridge to the skip a couple of weeks back. In a Clio with a couple of bungees


----------



## nogojones (Nov 12, 2020)

dessiato said:


> You should transport a fridge upright. That’d need to be a tall car! So a better guide would be a four draw upright filing cabinet laid horizontally.


Is this why you like convertibles?


----------



## dessiato (Nov 12, 2020)

nogojones said:


> Is this why you like convertibles?


There‘s usually a smallish boot on convertibles, but headroom is seldom a problem.


----------



## Combustible (Nov 13, 2020)

dessiato said:


> You should transport a fridge upright. That’d need to be a tall car! So a better guide would be a four draw upright filing cabinet laid horizontally.



Pfft


----------



## Detroit City (Nov 13, 2020)

Over here the larger the car/pickup/truck the larger the asshole driving it...


----------



## hash tag (Nov 13, 2020)

Combustible said:


> Pfft
> 
> View attachment 238602


----------



## nogojones (Nov 13, 2020)

Combustible said:


> Pfft
> 
> View attachment 238602


Should be upright


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 18, 2020)

Lada Vision. They didn't seem to know when to stop designing it and just kept adding details. Blyat.


----------



## nogojones (Nov 18, 2020)

Does it even have a boot? Or do you have to tie all your shopping to the roof


----------



## T & P (Nov 18, 2020)

Wheels are a bit small. Couldn't they have fitted bigger ones?


----------



## kebabking (Nov 18, 2020)




----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 18, 2020)

nogojones said:


> Does it even have a boot? Or do you have to tie all your shopping to the roof



Enough room for two moldy onions in an avoska so thats fine.


----------



## dylanredefined (Nov 18, 2020)

kebabking said:


> View attachment 239384


  I love the idea of owning a land rover then I drive an army one and wonder what the hell am I thinking? Maybe if I was a farmer or needed to tow stuff. I don't though.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Nov 18, 2020)

dylanredefined said:


> I love the idea of owning a land rover then I drive an army one and wonder what the hell am I thinking? Maybe if I was a farmer or needed to tow stuff. I don't though.


I love that it's 25 years since I owned a Land Rover.


----------



## kebabking (Nov 18, 2020)

I owned one about 20 years ago - it was moderately reliable in the 3 weeks that I owned it....


----------



## dylanredefined (Nov 18, 2020)

kebabking said:


> I owned one about 20 years ago - it was moderately reliable in the 3 weeks that I owned it....


  They either explosively deconstruct  5 minutes after you turn them on or run for ever. The snatch wagon  whose engine  went  boom just after I signed the work ticket making it my fault being particular noteworthy


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 18, 2020)

Mine blew up 14 years ago, to be fair to Land Rover it did have a whopping 23,000 miles on the clock.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Nov 18, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Mine blew up 14 years ago, to be fair to Land Rover it did have a whopping 23,000 miles on the clock.


How many gearboxes had it had?


----------



## mx wcfc (Nov 18, 2020)

dylanredefined said:


> They either explosively deconstruct  5 minutes after you turn them on or run for ever. The snatch wagon  whose engine  went  boom just after I signed the work ticket making it my fault being particular noteworthy


My brother bought Land Rover off the RAF.  
I remember telling him that it was a bargain, because it would have been regularly serviced and maintained to the highest standard.
He got rid of it after 6 months.


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 19, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> My brother bought Land Rover off the RAF.
> I remember telling him that it was a bargain, because it would have been regularly serviced and maintained to the highest standard.
> He got rid of it after 6 months.



We used to race them around the old V bomber dispersal area at Leuchars. In reverse, until they overheated and the head gaskets blew. He probably got one of those.


----------



## dylanredefined (Nov 19, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> We used to race them around the old V bomber dispersal area at Leuchars. In reverse, until they overheated and the head gaskets blew. He probably got one of those.


 Still not as stupid as some we killed. Radiator filled with oil by idiot ,engine cleaned with petrol (You are supposed to let the fumes evaporate before starting it)  To recce a route driven into large puddle which turned out to be a river sank without trace unfortunately didn't take physical training instructor with it. Who arrived back very damp and when asked about missing land rover " Funny story about that"  which obviously some people did not find amusing.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 19, 2020)

It's astonishing mx wcfc's brother thought anything from the military would have been well looked after. kebabking will be along in a minute to make him an offer on a radar unit, slight salt water damage, otherwise in perfect nick...


----------



## dylanredefined (Nov 19, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It's astonishing mx wcfc's brother thought anything from the military would have been well looked after. kebabking will be along in a minute to make him an offer on a radar unit, slight salt water damage, otherwise in perfect nick...


    It's either utterly used up and broken. Or immaculate and has hardly been used. Either as the military decided they were useless and then sat in stores until they could be got rid of or the fabled war stock which were kept for a war and then MOD decided to sell the nice ones off. You are  probably getting something shagged though.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 19, 2020)

dylanredefined said:


> It's either utterly used up and broken. Or immaculate and has hardly been used. Either as the military decided they were useless and then sat in stores until they could be got rid of or the fabled war stock which were kept for a war and then MOD decided to sell the nice ones off. You are  probably getting something shagged though.



I am led to believe kebabking’s radar unit is hardly used


----------



## A380 (Nov 19, 2020)

I think I mentioned this before. When Volvo T5s were relatively new my cousin decided to buy a stupidly cheap ultra high milage ex traffic police one. Despite being advised it would have spent  its life being driven 20 hours a day carrying loads of weight comprised of accident kit and two possible larger members of the constabulary with occasional episodes of being ragged stupid on blue light runs and chases. But he knew better.

On his way back down the M5 from the dealer he was overtaken by one of his own wheels...


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 19, 2020)

those who follow football may be aware of what has gone on at charlton this last year or so - 

one bunch of chancers allegedly bought the club, and spent rather a lot of money on themselves, including range rovers each.

the new owner has had them re-possessed, but one is now being raffled off









						Motoring! Charlton Athletic fans stand a chance of winning one of ‘infamous’ Range Rovers – as Thomas Sandgaard makes it prize in competition
					

Charlton Athletic owner Thomas Sandgaard has made one of the club’s company Range Rovers the prize in a new competition – claiming he wants it to highlight his push for change in regulations …




					londonnewsonline.co.uk


----------



## hash tag (Nov 28, 2020)

In Chelsea this morning. Just in case you happen to come across ice, snow, mud, pedestrian


----------



## kebabking (Nov 28, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> I am led to believe kebabking’s radar unit is hardly used



That's 'marine habitat zone' to you sunshine - it's achieved a consistent 100% serviceability rate in its role, and provided millions of pounds of benefits to the lobster fishing industries of the west of Scotland.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Nov 28, 2020)

hash tag said:


> In Chelsea this morning. Just in case you happen to come across ice, snow, mud, pedestrian


----------



## T & P (Nov 28, 2020)

The kill count is obviously just a crass joke, but I can imagine some people who’ve lost a loved one in a car vs pedestrian collision being pissed off enough to give the car a good keying or slashed tyre.


----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 10, 2020)

It’s so OTT it feels like a piss-take, mocking the cars others have around there. No film crews around shooting some kind of sketch with it?


----------



## Jay Park (Dec 10, 2020)

T & P said:


> The kill count is obviously just a crass joke, but I can imagine some people who’ve lost a loved one in a car vs pedestrian collision being pissed off enough to give the car a good keying or slashed tyre.



those windows would get panned if I saw that


----------



## Jay Park (Dec 10, 2020)

A380 said:


> I think I mentioned this before. When Volvo T5s were relatively new my cousin decided to buy a stupidly cheap ultra high milage ex traffic police one. Despite being advised it would have spent  its life being driven 20 hours a day carrying loads of weight comprised of accident kit and two possible larger members of the constabulary with occasional episodes of being ragged stupid on blue light runs and chases. But he knew better.
> 
> On his way back down the M5 from the dealer he was overtaken by one of his own wheels...



on the other hand, taxis in Tokyo



the wonderfully reliable, competent, and in my eyes attractive, Toyota crown get a service every 3 months and get scrapped after 3 years. Get your hands on one of them you’ve got a motor for life. Never seen one doing more than 20mph


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 10, 2020)

T & P said:


> The kill count is obviously just a crass joke, but I can imagine some people who’ve lost a loved one in a car vs pedestrian collision being pissed off enough to give the car a good keying or slashed tyre.



The fact that wheelchairs are the highest number of his ha-ha kills says something too...


----------



## kebabking (Dec 10, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> The fact that wheelchairs are the highest number of his ha-ha kills says something too...



It's just a realistic appraisal of the limits of the vehicles acceleration and and manouveribility capabilities.


----------



## ska invita (Dec 16, 2020)

on my way to work this morning - scenes from the school run


----------



## not-bono-ever (Dec 16, 2020)

Vermin


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 16, 2020)

Jay Park said:


> on the other hand, taxis in Tokyo
> 
> View attachment 242607
> 
> the wonderfully reliable, competent, and in my eyes attractive, Toyota crown get a service every 3 months and get scrapped after 3 years. Get your hands on one of them you’ve got a motor for life. Never seen one doing more than 20mph



That's a Toyota Comfort, the Crown is the LWB version. They are being phased out in favour of these things:







Used Comforts are very cheap at Japanese online auctions. I could get a sub 50,000km example landed CIF in Australia for less than $10k.


----------



## Jay Park (Dec 16, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> That's a Toyota Comfort, the Crown is the LWB version. They are being phased out in favour of these things:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



exactly


----------



## Jay Park (Dec 16, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> That's a Toyota Comfort, the Crown is the LWB version. They are being phased out in favour of these things:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



and those motors were rolled out for the Olympics, whatever happened there...


----------



## Jay Park (Dec 16, 2020)

DownwardDog said:


> That's a Toyota Comfort, the Crown is the LWB version. They are being phased out in favour of these things:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



and I’m pretty certain they are Crowns that Tokyo taxi drivers scoot about in


----------



## hash tag (Dec 16, 2020)

ska invita said:


> on my way to work this morning - scenes from the school run
> 
> 
> View attachment 243745


Darling, don't worry, I'll drop you right by the school gate


----------



## mx wcfc (Dec 16, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Darling, don't worry, I'll drop you right by the school gate


I used to drive past a school on my way to work.  There was a zebra crossing directly outside the school.  One day a parent stopped their car in front of me, _on the zebra crossing _to let their offspring out.  Damned lucky I didn't rear-end them, given you don't anticipate the car in front stopping on a zebra crossing.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 16, 2020)

We have all seen it. People stopping in illegal and very dangerous places, either in the flesh or on television. As long as my child is safe I don't give a toss about the others.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 17, 2020)

ska invita said:


> on my way to work this morning - scenes from the school run
> 
> 
> View attachment 243745



 I reckon that's a teacher come to open up the school. No kids around, gates locked, car positioned exactly as it would be if she's about to unlock the gates and drive in. If it were proper bad 4X4 business, Q7 level, it would have parked on that bench.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 1, 2021)

If anyone is interested, I have just seen this. it is for sale, in London and it could be yours for a price. It is 6.2L, petrol & automatic.
Just 2000 miles on the clock. The interior looks wrong and needs redoing. The reds OK but the centre console is just so wrong.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 1, 2021)

If you would like a plate to go with it, they have, amongst other things, registration 4 K if you are interested.



Spoiler: 4 K



£750, 000 + VAT


----------



## ViolentPanda (Jan 8, 2021)

hash tag said:


> In Chelsea this morning. Just in case you happen to come across ice, snow, mud, pedestrianView attachment 240842View attachment 240843View attachment 240844



What the uncle-fucking fuck???    

I kind of get the Jeep - they always look ungainly, awkward & generally pedestrian-unfriendly, but the Toyota Land Cruiser(?) in full redneck regalia needs to be nuked from orbit, & the owner whipped like an egg-sucking dog!!!


----------



## hash tag (Jan 18, 2021)

Here' s one which speaks for itself


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 18, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Here' s one which speaks for itselfView attachment 249793




Guess he got the plate after the first time he filled it up with fuel. RR V8  = gallons per mile...


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 19, 2021)

In answer to the OP, no. The G Wagon is the current title holder.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 19, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> In answer to the OP, no. The G Wagon is the current title holder.


Wrapped. Of course.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 21, 2021)

You need a winch in West London because?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 21, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> In answer to the OP, no. The G Wagon is the current title holder.


  That’s a shame. I can dig g wagens in a g wagen environment. They are impractical lumps around town tho.


----------



## kebabking (Feb 21, 2021)

hash tag said:


> You need a winch in West London because? View attachment 255430



Your other car is a Landover?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 21, 2021)

not-bono-ever said:


> That’s a shame. I can dig g wagens in a g wagen environment. They are impractical lumps around town tho.



There seem to be a lot of them around now and whilst I appreciate their style in a Terminator way, having looked at them they lack power, are not particularly refined inside and cost considerably more than a full fat Range Rover, where is this money going? I imagine Richard Hammond likes them too.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 21, 2021)

mad that a military vehicle developed for the shah has been elevated to bling cache. they are very twocable in the  balkans iirc


----------



## kebabking (Feb 21, 2021)

not-bono-ever said:


> mad that a military vehicle developed for the shah has been elevated to bling cache. they are very twocable in the  balkans iirc



There were two in Bosnia that had been converted to carry and fire 82mm Sov/Yugo mortars. Astonishingly, they had no suspension left....


----------



## hash tag (Feb 22, 2021)

It might not be the worst but it sure has class


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 23, 2021)

Yeh but no but yeh but really no.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 23, 2021)

kebabking said:


> There were two in Bosnia that had been converted to carry and fire 82mm Sov/Yugo mortars. Astonishingly, they had no suspension left....


 
They were very desirable back in the day in the hood. Few on the ground but easier to use discreetly  than a twocced white UN Toyota


----------



## hash tag (Apr 2, 2021)

The all new kid on the block, a Caddy Escalade! Other makes exist (Lincoln or GMC).


----------



## kebabking (Apr 2, 2021)

Vommit smiley?


----------



## hash tag (Apr 2, 2021)

Right on cue, a Lincoln from this afternoon's walk around Sth Ken


----------



## hash tag (Apr 4, 2021)

I know it's not a 4x4 but check out that paint


----------



## DownwardDog (Apr 4, 2021)

All Conti GTs are 4wd.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 4, 2021)

It's not really in suv/ range rover territory


----------



## kabbes (Apr 4, 2021)

That car has to cost more than the property it’s parked next to


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 4, 2021)

kabbes said:


> That car has to cost more than the property it’s parked next to




That paint job will have dented its value


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Apr 4, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> That paint job will have dented its value



Could it be a wrap? I mean if your going to do something really bad taste at least preserve the paint work.


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 4, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> Could it be a wrap? I mean if your going to do something really bad taste at least preserve the paint work.



Good point


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 4, 2021)

Sod the paintwork, red leather on the dash and brown for the seats, it's like someone has gone to Bentley and said, "Make me the most hideous car in the history of humanity" and they've given it a good shot.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 4, 2021)

On the subject of interiors, Audi who obviously make the most perfect of all motors, ones that are subtle and refined, yet with real bollocks should the need arise, they allow you this abomination, and more shockingly some tasteless cunts go for it...


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 4, 2021)

Madness.people in Audi lack taste. What had the world come to ?


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 4, 2021)

I feel like I post this in a regular basis. This evening on the dual carriageway towards blackwall. A car came thumping up behind me with Marty Feldman headlights, one about 20% strength of the other. I pulled in as he was right up my arse. Yep. A decade old RR sport pumping out a cloud of oily smoke. And yes, one of the back lights were out.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 4, 2021)

Dreadful dreadful cars. Dreadful


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 16, 2021)

Land Rover hearse designed by Prince Philip unveiled
					

The Duke of Edinburgh oversaw modifications to the car, which will carry his coffin at Saturday's funeral.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## dessiato (Apr 16, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Land Rover hearse designed by Prince Philip unveiled
> 
> 
> The Duke of Edinburgh oversaw modifications to the car, which will carry his coffin at Saturday's funeral.
> ...


Beaten to it!


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 16, 2021)

I dont kinda hate that as much as I should. I once was offered a 70s LWB Mk2a that had 8k on it and had never been off the estate or ever road registered, just used to take the toffs to the shoot from the big house.I was tempted but yeh, landrovers.


----------



## DownwardDog (Apr 17, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Land Rover hearse designed by Prince Philip unveiled
> 
> 
> The Duke of Edinburgh oversaw modifications to the car, which will carry his coffin at Saturday's funeral.
> ...



I hope the seals on the turbo go with the DoE on the back so the engine runs away and catches fire.


----------



## nogojones (Apr 17, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> I hope the seals on the turbo go with the DoE on the back so the engine runs away and catches fire.


It's what he would have wanted. To take a few with him.


----------



## dessiato (Apr 17, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> I hope the seals on the turbo go with the DoE on the back so the engine runs away and catches fire.


Why does it need a turbo? Surely all it needs is low, and 1st & reverse. After all it isn't going anywhere much, and isn't going there in a hurry.


----------



## hippogriff (Apr 17, 2021)

dessiato said:


> Why does it need a turbo? Surely all it needs is low, and 1st & reverse. After all it isn't going anywhere much, and isn't going there in a hurry.


The vehicle's original role would have been to transport the duke from Wellington Arch in central London to Windsor, 22 miles away, but the coronavirus pandemic curtailed those long-held plans.  It's a TD5 130, so it's got a turbo; they're not going to take it off, are they


----------



## Doodler (Apr 17, 2021)

Saw a Range Rover parked right across the pavement the other day, forcing pedestrians to step into the road to get past. So I gobbed on the windscreen, a right good custard cream too, felt happier


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Apr 17, 2021)

Doodler said:


> Saw a Range Rover parked right across the pavement the other day, forcing pedestrians to step into the road to get past. So I gobbed on the windscreen, a right good custard cream too, felt happier


Just climb onto the bonnet and walk over it.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 17, 2021)

Doodler said:


> Saw a Range Rover parked right across the pavement the other day, forcing pedestrians to step into the road to get past. So I gobbed on the windscreen, a right good custard cream too, felt happier



Like this cunt I saw yesterday?


----------



## dessiato (Apr 17, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Like this cunt I saw yesterday?
> 
> View attachment 263685


Deserves to have every panel keyed.


----------



## Doodler (Apr 17, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Like this cunt I saw yesterday?
> 
> View attachment 263685



Yes very much like that but with even less space left over. If only you coulld wave a magic wand and instantly fill the interior with liquidised shit right to the top. Then watch until the owner returns, cries out in horror and then, being a Range Rover driver, opens one of the doors.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 17, 2021)

even audi drivers have accepted second place in the arrogant wanker premier league to RR drivers


----------



## T & P (Apr 17, 2021)

I'd wager that Phil the Greek 'designed' that Land Rover to the same technical degree and expertise as the child who 'designed' the race car below...


----------



## Septimus Rufiji (Apr 17, 2021)




----------



## hash tag (Apr 17, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> On the subject of interiors, Audi who obviously make the most perfect of all motors, ones that are subtle and refined, yet with real bollocks should the need arise, they allow you this abomination, and more shockingly some tasteless cunts go for it...
> 
> View attachment 261774


If you are buying at Romans, in addition to Audi's, they also sell many decent cars.


----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 29, 2021)

One of nine Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Electric Drives is up for sale
					

There’s an ultra-rare 2013 Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Electric Drive up for sale on RM Sotheby’s.




					www.autoblog.com


----------



## hash tag (May 2, 2021)

Quite rare and not available to Joe public, you could have course have an armoured car. I saw an XC90 priced at £450,000. There are of course many different specs and suppliers. This is an old article This Armored and Stretched Rolls-Royce Cullinan Limousine Costs a Cool $2 Million


----------



## thismoment (May 2, 2021)

hash tag said:


> I know it's not a 4x4 but check out that paint
> View attachment 261699


I saw this paint job today and thought to myself if I bought that car I’d pay to have it removed.  Very very similar car too


----------



## hash tag (May 2, 2021)

That was near tower Hamlets cemetery park.


----------



## thismoment (May 2, 2021)

I saw it Norwood way


----------



## hash tag (May 2, 2021)

It's all down hill from crown point


----------



## ViolentPanda (May 10, 2021)

hash tag said:


> It might not be the worst but it sure has class View attachment 255654



The car looks fucking embarrassed!


----------



## hash tag (May 31, 2021)

Following neatly on to prove that money doesn't buy class. Exiting Wandsworth Bridge yesterday


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 31, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Following neatly on to prove that money doesn't buy class. Exiting Wandsworth Bridge yesterday View attachment 271096



Yesterday took BB2 to Tower Bridge and there was an Aventador that drove over and back again, revving the fuck out of it all the way even though it was in a snail crawl traffic jam. It occurred to me that that car is a good thing, or else the driver would need to get a t shirt printed or something to let everyone know what a massive dickhead he is.


----------



## kebabking (May 31, 2021)

Bro...


----------



## hash tag (May 31, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Yesterday took BB2 to Tower Bridge and there was an Aventador that drove over and back again, revving the fuck out of it all the way even though it was in a snail crawl traffic jam. It occurred to me that that car is a good thing, or else the driver would need to get a t shirt printed or something to let everyone know what a massive dickhead he is.


I saw a purple one over the weekend with a woman struggling behind the wheel.


----------



## SpookyFrank (May 31, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Yesterday took BB2 to Tower Bridge and there was an Aventador that drove over and back again, revving the fuck out of it all the way even though it was in a snail crawl traffic jam. It occurred to me that that car is a good thing, or else the driver would need to get a t shirt printed or something to let everyone know what a massive dickhead he is.



It's probably really hard to drive one of those things in slow traffic. Which of course is an excellent reason not to allow them on the roads, or anywhere else.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 31, 2021)

kebabking said:


> Bro...




Man mountain driving a mountain and jungle conquering iron steed made of fire and girders gets written off by a ford focus C max on a country lane. pathetic isnt it. Lets hope the Ford driver was OK


----------



## BigMoaner (Jun 1, 2021)

not-bono-ever said:


> Madness.people in Audi lack taste. What had the world come to ?


Pretty sure you can't get finance on an Audi unless you can prove that youre a Massive Cunt.


hash tag said:


> View attachment 238667


If that's real boy is that a feat of human skill and strength.


----------



## marty21 (Jun 1, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Saw my first ever Rolls Royce Cullinan in the flesh earlier, jeepers it is fugly. At first I thought I was following a hearse. I'm sure it's a nice place to sit, but its main purpose seems to be to tell everyone that you've got loads-a-money.


Saw one yesterday when I was driving back from Bath , looked them up, top of the range is 500k! It was just a big black SUV , but I guess it let's people know you can afford a Rolls .


----------



## DownwardDog (Jun 1, 2021)

SpookyFrank said:


> It's probably really hard to drive one of those things in slow traffic. Which of course is an excellent reason not to allow them on the roads, or anywhere else.



The Aventador is relatively easy to drive in traffic as it has good power steering and not terrible visibility/mirrors. The Lambo dealer once lent me a (red) one for an afternoon while they borrowed my late, lamented Periscopo Countach for display. I would absolutely love one if I had the money. I'd get an SV in Viola Parsifae.







Flawed in some ways, unsurpassed brilliance in others. We'll miss it when it's gone.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 5, 2021)

I don't know about 4x4's but this is seriously unpleasant....in the UK as well https://flipboard.com/topic/norfolk...eRw6yge9HzNO73g:a:2533536023-1645cf10b2/co.uk


----------



## Storm Fox (Jun 5, 2021)

I have a Soft-Roader, I live in a more rural area and as my last car was a fiesta which needed 3 new wheels (not tyres) due to pot holes hit, not going above the speed limit I might add, I felt I needed something a little more robust. There are also a lot of single track roads and when meeting other cars on these I try to move into the verge to allow normal cars to pass on the road, but it's (un)surprising the number of Range Rover drivers who don't want to get a tyre dirty and force other cars into the verge.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jun 5, 2021)

Nearly Top score here. White RR derivative with a personalised plate. Driver pulls up and dumped his red bull can in the gutter and sauntered off to the pub. I watched it from afar. He would have got top points if it had been a convertible


----------



## DownwardDog (Jun 11, 2021)

New Landcruiser 300 that will probably never come to the UK. No V8s, only V6s, so Queensland is in mourning.






It's probably great off road and the interior won't fall apart like an RR.


----------



## T & P (Jun 11, 2021)

The fugliness is exceptional, though. Even for the segment.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jun 11, 2021)

T & P said:


> The fugliness is exceptional, though. Even for the segment.



It looks great; an interesting blend of retro and modern. The fitment is whack though but almost nobody will run stock wheels.


----------



## T & P (Jun 12, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> It looks great; an interesting blend of retro and modern. The fitment is whack though but almost nobody will run stock wheels.


I fear your time spent Down Under has clouded your judgement (tongue-in-cheek comment btw  ). Regardless of whether one likes the concept of SUVs or not, at least some of them can be described as aesthetically pleasing and not tacky.

Most American vehicles of the segment firmly fall into the crass-as-fuck category. Much as a wanker penis extension vehicle the Range Rover or the German premium offerings might seem to those who are not a fan of them, at least some models have a degree of elegance or slickness in their design that transmits a degree of admirable design and engineering quality.

That Toyota doesn’t start off too badly from the front, and the headlights are fairly pleasant to the eye, but the back end looks like what you would expect a five-year-old to produce if asked to draw a car. It almost feels like an aspirational Range Rover for people who like pick-up trucks.

On that subject, even though they are (thankfully) rare in Europe, we should really have a dedicated thread to pickup trucks. Surely the ugliest, most pointless, wasteful, and least practical vehicle ever produced in human history for the overwhelming majority of people who choose to but one.

I really struggle to think of many scenarios where their design would be advantageous over SUVs, people carriers, actual vans or anything else for pretty much 90% of those who buy them, over their lifetime anyway.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jun 12, 2021)

T & P said:


> On that subject, even though they are (thankfully) rare in Europe, we should really have a dedicated thread to pickup trucks. Surely the ugliest, most pointless, wasteful, and least practical vehicle ever produced in human history for the overwhelming majority of people who choose to but one.
> 
> I really struggle to think of many scenarios where their design would be advantageous over SUVs, people carriers, actual vans or anything else for pretty much 90% of those who buy them, over their lifetime anyway.



Most pickups are body on chassis designs with solid axles so you get a lot more payload and towing capacity. RR towing capacity: 3,500kg Ford F350 towing capacity: 17,000kg


----------



## Dogsauce (Jun 12, 2021)

Pick-ups are great for site work, easy to chuck an IBC in the back. I had a Mitsubishi L200 twin cab thing when I was working down at Coed Darcy, miles of gravel tracks to play on around the derelict oil refinery. Better suspension than a Land Rover type thing. I did manage to go about four times the site speed limit in places. You’ll see them being driven by farmers and builders a lot, plus the odd mid-life crisis bellend (though those tend to be the shiny ones with stuff like ‘barbarian’ written on the side).


----------



## hash tag (Jun 14, 2021)

Admittedly our pug is slightly smaller than an XC90 but check this for size


----------



## DownwardDog (Jun 16, 2021)

Ferrari 365GT/Jeep Wagoneer hybrid. Don't hate it.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 16, 2021)

Don't hate it? Couldn't love it.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jun 16, 2021)

T & P said:


> The fugliness is exceptional, though. Even for the segment.



Compared to the new LR 'Defender' it's a beauty queen.


----------



## T & P (Jul 8, 2021)

Just spotted this in Mayfair. I wish I could have taken pictures of the front and/or side as well. Truly magnificient


----------



## hash tag (Jul 8, 2021)

Typical brash middle Eastern bling for supercar season. I wonder if they infiltrate the cruise on the last Saturday?


----------



## flypanam (Jul 8, 2021)

What's hanging off the back of it?


----------



## A380 (Jul 8, 2021)

T & P said:


> Just spotted this in Mayfair. I wish I could have taken pictures of the front and/or side as well. Truly magnificient
> 
> View attachment 277527


Looks like you have a missile on your bike...


----------



## T & P (Jul 8, 2021)

flypanam said:


> What's hanging off the back of it?


I think it's of the rear lights, the lightbulb part of it anyway.



A380 said:


> Looks like you have a missile on your bike...


It does, and often I wish the bike did come with ground-to-lemming missiles, frankly.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 13, 2021)

That is gopping. It’s mad that a boxy off roader designed for the shah is now a status symbol worthy of patrolling the streets of Mayfair. We are fucked that this is considered an aspirational goal


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 24, 2021)

well yeh


----------



## weltweit (Jul 24, 2021)

It is when you realise the price some people have paid for their cars that mental problems can arise, my car is probably worth £500 now slightly dented as it is. But I can be driving on the motorway with a RR Sport which might have cost its driver £70,000 and is certainly costing them a factor more in petrol compared to my Corsa. 

I don't have an issue with people owning exotic cars so will chat to a Ferrari or Maclaren or Maserati owner and can love the vehicle because they are special. I guess I shouldn't feel the way I do about RR Sports though, perhaps the owner bought it for a similar reason the Ferrari driver did. Don't know. 

When I was a biker, some 25 years ago, Volvos were our enemies, the marketing was pretty much built like a tank you won't get injured in a Volvo. This despite that Volvo drivers then had a false sense of security and didn't pay enough attention to their surroundings, causing them among other things to pull out on motorcycles because they couldn't be bothered to look properly. 

Perhaps it is my Volvo feelings that drive my mistrust of RR Sports, you are certainly safer in a RR than you are in a Corsa?


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jul 24, 2021)

flypanam said:


> What's hanging off the back of it?


I think it's a picture of Stevie Wonder


----------



## Leafster (Jul 24, 2021)

weltweit said:


> It is when you realise the price some people have paid for their cars that mental problems can arise, my car is probably worth £500 now slightly dented as it is. But I can be driving on the motorway with a RR Sport which might have cost its driver £70,000 and is certainly costing them a factor more in petrol compared to my Corsa.
> 
> I don't have an issue with people owning exotic cars so will chat to a Ferrari or Maclaren or Maserati owner and can love the vehicle because they are special. I guess I shouldn't feel the way I do about RR Sports though, perhaps the owner bought it for a similar reason the Ferrari driver did. Don't know.
> 
> ...


It seems to be this sense of safety and security that is a central part of the marketing of SUVs. "You must be an irresponsible parent if you don't protect your kiddies properly on the school run by driving an SUV"


----------



## A380 (Jul 24, 2021)

Leafster said:


> It seems to be this sense of safety and security that is a central part of the marketing of SUVs. "You must be an irresponsible parent if you don't protect your kiddies properly on the school run by driving an SUV"


Isn't it more "Do you know you can't really drive that well? buy an SUV so YOU won't get hurt when you inevitably crash cos you're shit"   ?


----------



## Chilli.s (Jul 24, 2021)

A380 said:


> Isn't it more "Do you know you can't really drive that well? buy an SUV so YOU won't get hurt when you inevitably crash cos you're shit"   ?


And  shit city drivers who when out of town scare themselves on country lanes then think that a suv is safer.


----------



## platinumsage (Jul 24, 2021)

No injuries here. Surprised the lorry driver escaped unscathed though:


----------



## Dogsauce (Jul 25, 2021)

platinumsage said:


> No injuries here. Surprised the lorry driver escaped unscathed though:



The lorry doesn’t decelerate much as a result of the collision, so wouldn’t have thought there would be a serious injury from that.


----------



## sleaterkinney (Jul 25, 2021)

Thought this belonged in the thread:


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 26, 2021)

The Evoque is interesting because they have a 600m wading depth and there is no way that water is 600m deep.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jul 26, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> The Evoque is interesting because they have a 600m wading depth and there is no way that water is 600m deep.


They probably thought they could go through at speed.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 26, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> The Evoque is interesting because they have a 600m wading depth and there is no way that water is 600m deep.



600 metres


----------



## strung out (Jul 26, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> 600 metres


Miles!


----------



## T & P (Jul 26, 2021)

sleaterkinney said:


> Thought this belonged in the thread:



Ah, I was thinking yesterday of the spot of road on the bottom image, as it's on my daily commute and it has lots of previous history with flooding. Hasn't disappointed


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 26, 2021)

weltweit said:


> Perhaps it is my Volvo feelings that drive my mistrust of RR Sports, you are certainly safer in a RR than you are in a Corsa?



Not if you adjust for the fact that range rover drivers are stupid cunts.


----------



## pogofish (Jul 26, 2021)

Meanwhile, in Stonehaven:









						Moment £40k supercar is towed after 'show-off' driver gets stuck on beach
					

THIS is the hilarious moment a £40,000 Nissan supercar had to be towed in front of a jeering crowd after its “show-off” driver got stuck on a beach. The red-faced man was forced to call…




					www.thesun.co.uk
				




I've seen that car around enough times - and yes, the driver is a Muppet..!  

Also, its not a beach - its a wee bit of sand at the end of the ramp where they launch/pull boats on to trailers.


----------



## nogojones (Jul 26, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> The Evoque is interesting because they have a 600m wading depth and there is no way that water is 600m deep.


They likely just broke down there, then the flood came after.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 27, 2021)

Nothing wrong with the wading capabilities of the Tesla Model 3.


----------



## pogofish (Jul 27, 2021)

pogofish said:


> Meanwhile, in Stonehaven:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Even better, it appears that the driver of that car is currently banned for driving without insurance - He was hauled back into court to explain himself this morning..!


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jul 27, 2021)

pogofish said:


> Meanwhile, in Stonehaven:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


The Scum?


----------



## pogofish (Jul 27, 2021)

It is covered in other media but that link kept the audio.  No other particular reason for choosing them.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jul 30, 2021)

not RR but yeh









						M1: Woman caught driving at 130mph 'needed the toilet'
					

Officers pointed out the woman had actually sped past motorway services.



					www.bbc.co.uk
				




G wagens. I can cope with them in German forestry industry and used by farmers and shit, but Derby= no

crass


----------



## T & P (Jul 30, 2021)

When you gotta go, you gotta go.


----------



## rubbershoes (Aug 1, 2021)

Chilli.s said:


> And  shit city drivers who when out of town scare themselves on country lanes then think that a suv is safer.



The perfect solution. 

MPV offroader


----------



## hash tag (Aug 13, 2021)




----------



## hash tag (Aug 14, 2021)

Seemed like a good place to stick this. Here's my car after a nuts and bolts restoration which cost over £300,000. He did not have the receipts with him.


----------



## T & P (Aug 26, 2021)

I saw today a 2021 Bentley Bentayga. The rear lights are indescribably ugly- far worse in the flesh than in any photograph. The looked like a pair of stretched prolapsed arseholes, frankly, more so when they're illuminated.


----------



## dessiato (Aug 26, 2021)

T & P said:


> I saw today a 2021 Bentley Bentayga. The rear lights are indescribably ugly- far worse in the flesh than in any photograph. The looked like a pair of stretched prolapsed arseholes, frankly, more so when they're illuminated.


Nice trousers though.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Aug 26, 2021)

T & P said:


> I saw today a 2021 Bentley Bentayga. The rear lights are indescribably ugly- far worse in the flesh than in any photograph. The looked like a pair of stretched prolapsed arseholes, frankly, more so when they're illuminated.


How many hands did that design go through and not one of them said 'hang on a fucking minute!'
Looks like something you'd expect from Kia 20 years ago.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 27, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Bentley Bentayga gets Akrapovic exhaust option
> 
> 
> No, really: new extras include scatter cushions, Bentley golf bags... and a set of Slovenia's finest titanium tail pipes
> ...





T & P said:


> I saw today a 2021 Bentley Bentayga. The rear lights are indescribably ugly- far worse in the flesh than in any photograph. The looked like a pair of stretched prolapsed arseholes, frankly, more so when they're illuminated.


Bit late to the party with this one, they must be so yesterday by now


----------



## Dogsauce (Aug 27, 2021)

I thought the knobs (‘made a bit of money in property’ types) that drove Bentleys are all doing maseratis now?


----------



## hash tag (Aug 27, 2021)

I wouldn't say no to a Maserati, not a Levante though as they are shite. At last count 7 sperate recalls?


----------



## A380 (Aug 28, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Seemed like a good place to stick this. Here's my car after a nuts and bolts restoration which cost over £300,000. He did not have the receipts with him. View attachment 283607



Was that done by Aston Martin’s hermitage plant at Newport Paggnel? They basically rebuild the cars completely. They also do ‘new restorations’ to get round modern regulations some bright cookie at Aston about 50 years ago started registering cars and making the data plates that hadn’t been built and storing them. So now they will be build a brand new DB 5 say snd use one of the original data plates and registration to give a new ‘old’ car.

I should have gone to see the place but Covid…


----------



## hash tag (Sep 4, 2021)

Time to die.....of shame Land Rover launches Defender V8 Bond Edition | PistonHeads UK


----------



## A380 (Sep 4, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Time to die.....of shame Land Rover launches Defender V8 Bond Edition | PistonHeads UK
> View attachment 286750


Grumpy Land Rover is grumpy.


----------



## hash tag (Sep 4, 2021)

Yes, it does look grumpy rather than anything else.


----------



## dessiato (Sep 4, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Time to die.....of shame Land Rover launches Defender V8 Bond Edition | PistonHeads UK
> View attachment 286750


I rather like that. It'd be great up and down the slip.


----------



## ska invita (Sep 4, 2021)




----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 5, 2021)

I never realised they looked good when slammed.


----------



## T & P (Sep 5, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Time to die.....of shame Land Rover launches Defender V8 Bond Edition | PistonHeads UK
> View attachment 286750


More like Russian gangster edition.

Seriously though, regardless of the looks and cost of the actual car, you’d have to be particularly pathetic to choose a supercar with ‘007’ branding visible on the outside. Who are they hoping to impress with that? 

Get yourself an Aston Martin if you’re so desperate to pretend you’re living the James Bond life ffs…


----------



## Saul Goodman (Sep 5, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> I never realised they looked good when slammed.


They don't


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 5, 2021)

T & P said:


> More like Russian gangster edition.
> 
> Seriously though, regardless of the looks and cost of the actual car, you’d have to be particularly pathetic to choose a supercar with ‘007’ branding visible on the outside. Who are they hoping to impress with that?
> 
> Get yourself an Aston Martin if you’re so desperate to pretend you’re living the James Bond life ffs…



Globetrotter who charge around £1500 for a sodding suitcase also do 007 ones that cost around 25% more. My thoughts at seeing them are the same as yours re the car.


----------



## A380 (Sep 5, 2021)

Also, you wouldn’t be able to see the shitty 007 decals when you turned on the invisibility cloak or activated the smoke screen…


----------



## hash tag (Sep 5, 2021)

Range rover seats?


----------



## hash tag (Sep 5, 2021)

Decals?


----------



## HAL9000 (Sep 6, 2021)

Its a concept car, clearly BMW's strategy is the uglier the better.

BMW I Vision Circular concept.















						BMW’s i Vision Circular concept thinks about sustainable car-making
					

The concept is informing BMW's next Neue Klasse, due in 2025.




					arstechnica.com


----------



## AverageJoe (Sep 7, 2021)




----------



## dessiato (Sep 7, 2021)

AverageJoe said:


> View attachment 287167


That is ugly


----------



## AverageJoe (Sep 7, 2021)

dessiato said:


> That is slugly


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 7, 2021)

T & P said:


> Seriously though, regardless of the looks and cost of the actual car, you’d have to be particularly pathetic to choose a supercar with ‘007’ branding visible on the outside. Who are they hoping to impress with that?



Lots and lots of sad twats with silly money out there.


----------



## kabbes (Sep 7, 2021)

AverageJoe said:


> View attachment 287167


Wot


----------



## nick (Sep 7, 2021)

It looks like a concept for the latest Gillette Ladyshave


----------



## T & P (Sep 7, 2021)

Or something you would use to soften the soles of your feet.


----------



## Sweet FA (Sep 7, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> I never realised they looked good when slammed.


Predictable howls of anguish in the comments.


----------



## Leafster (Oct 11, 2021)

Who needs a 4x4 for its "off-road capabilities anyway?!


----------



## hash tag (Oct 11, 2021)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 11, 2021)

hash tag said:


> View attachment 292367




The colour of the wheels clash horribly with that Anus.


----------



## hash tag (Oct 19, 2021)

The metropolitan don't you know https://images.pistonheads.com/nimg/44817/Discovery_01.jpg


----------



## Elpenor (Oct 19, 2021)

Peak Essex on display in this clip.









						Video shows Range Rover pushing Insulate Britain activist at sit-in
					

Driver seen inching car forwards on to protesters blocking road in Thurrock as onlookers goad her on




					www.theguardian.com
				




I presume the white Range Rover was in for a service


----------



## dessiato (Oct 19, 2021)

Elpenor said:


> Peak Essex on display in this clip.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


That's horrifying. But I don't understand why the driver's face is obscured. Name and shame.


----------



## ska invita (Oct 19, 2021)

dessiato said:


> That's horrifying. But I don't understand why the driver's face is obscured. Name and shame.


not obscured in the Insulate Britain twitter video


----------



## dessiato (Oct 19, 2021)

ska invita said:


> not obscured in the Insulate Britain twitter video


Good. I saw it on a news site.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 19, 2021)

ska invita said:


> not obscured in the Insulate Britain twitter video



Nor is the number plate, which reveals that the car is untaxed.


----------



## T & P (Oct 19, 2021)

SpookyFrank said:


> Nor is the number plate, which reveals that the car is untaxed.


How do you know? Does the DVLA tells you if you put in the plate?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 19, 2021)

dessiato said:


> That's horrifying. But I don't understand why the driver's face is obscured. Name and shame.




Guardian obscuring it as that could well lead to quite a serious charge for the driver and they don’t want to prejudice a trial.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Oct 19, 2021)

Seems her name is Sherrilyn Speid.

Never heard the name Sherrilyn before.


----------



## Elpenor (Oct 19, 2021)

Sherilynn Fenn was Audrey Horne in Twin Peaks, but that’s with one r


----------



## Saul Goodman (Oct 19, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Seems her name is Sherrilyn Speid.
> 
> Never heard the name Sherrilyn before.


I think I heard it mentioned in a list on Ted the movie.


----------



## nick (Oct 20, 2021)

T & P said:


> How do you know? Does the DVLA tells you if you put in the plate?











						Check if a vehicle is taxed
					

Check and report if a vehicle has up-to-date vehicle tax or is 'off road' (SORN)




					www.gov.uk
				



HTH


----------



## mx wcfc (Oct 20, 2021)

Good to see the local Rants group on FB slagging this off...

Which utter fuck-knuckle has just ’parked’ like this on  St Pauls Hill? We thought it was stolen at first, but after checking, evidently this is just piss your pants entitlement from some middle class (and quite possibly about to be registered blind) wanker.  Maybe you couldn’t colour inside the lines as a child, but you should have learnt where things go by now, move your car you dickhead.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Oct 25, 2021)

ULEZ has kicked in here. I have never seen as many shitty derv engined rr sports on the streets ever. All well un ULEZ compliant. The twats


----------



## ska invita (Nov 12, 2021)

lol









						COP26: Activists deflate tyres on 'luxury' cars in Glasgow
					

A number of SUVs in the city's West End were left with flyers branding them a "climate violation".



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## nick (Nov 12, 2021)

This company is worth more than Ford
Dilemma: SUV, but electric. Hate or worship?bloomberg link


----------



## hash tag (Nov 15, 2021)

Today's offering. It's mean in Mayfair


----------



## Part 2 (Nov 19, 2021)

Shoppers left bemused by 'advert' offering free penis enlargement to 4x4 drivers
					

'I just couldn't believe it'




					www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Nov 19, 2021)

Part 2 said:


> Shoppers left bemused by 'advert' offering free penis enlargement to 4x4 drivers
> 
> 
> 'I just couldn't believe it'
> ...


Looks like FokaWolf has been up north then


----------



## not-bono-ever (Nov 24, 2021)

Just seen anew defender. What a massive ugly vehicle. Looks to be made of Lego. Truly gopping - do people actually buy these things ?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 24, 2021)

not-bono-ever said:


> Just seen anew defender. What a massive ugly vehicle. Looks to be made of Lego. Truly gopping - do people actually buy these things ?




I like the extras that people pay for, saw one the other day with an exhaust snorkel, a platform on the roof with a ladder down one side of the car and some kind of box hanging off the other side. This was in Guildford, ffs.


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 24, 2021)

not-bono-ever said:


> Just seen anew defender. What a massive ugly vehicle. Looks to be made of Lego. Truly gopping - do people actually buy these things ?



One of my mates has just got one and another has one on order. It's going to be a massive sales success. They are surprisingly small inside, obviously poorly built but are incredibly good off-road.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 24, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> One of my mates has just got one and another has one on order. It's going to be a massive sales success. They are surprisingly small inside, obviously poorly built but are incredibly good off-road.




At least you have some real off-road near you. But no way I'd rely on Land Rover's reliability in the outback.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Nov 24, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> At least you have some real off-road near you. But no way I'd rely on Land Rover's reliability in the outback.


Isn’t every vehicle in the actual outback a Landcruiser?


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 24, 2021)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Isn’t every vehicle in the actual outback a Landcruiser?



Landcruisers are (very) expensive here so the most ubiquitous privately owned vehicles in the bush are dual cab pickups such as Hi-Luxes and the like.

There are also the body-on-chassis SUVs ike the Toyota Fortuna, Mitsubishi Pajero Sport and Isuzu M-UX which are very rugged and practical.


----------



## Brainaddict (Nov 24, 2021)

I suppose it was inevitable that the new defender would look like a boxier and more rugged range rover (at least from the front, back looks a bit different), but all it does for me is transfer my hatred of range rovers to the new beast. Not surprised it's small inside, the cab looks pretty narrow from the back - not much of a working vehicle then, even if it can go offroad properly.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Nov 24, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> One of my mates has just got one and another has one on order. It's going to be a massive sales success. They are surprisingly small inside, obviously poorly built but are incredibly good off-road.


I can see that in your neck of the woods but in SE London the Snorkel, around the world In 80 days roof rack  and ladders look a bit out of place


----------



## pesh (Nov 24, 2021)




----------



## hash tag (Nov 24, 2021)

To serve as a warning, do not touch my car 💥


----------



## DownwardDog (Nov 30, 2021)

BMW XM coming in 2023. The 750bhp plug in hybrid we didn't know we needed.


----------



## Brainaddict (Nov 30, 2021)

Haha, that's hilarious. "We must make our front grille as aggressive and manly as possible for fear it be seen as a pussy's car." "But we don't need one at all because it's electric." "SHUT UP AND MAKE IT BIGGER."


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Nov 30, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> BMW XM coming in 2023. The 750bhp plug in hybrid we didn't know we needed.


As an example of the sheer lack of imagination/innovation in modern car manufacturing and/or their target markets, that takes some beating.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 30, 2021)

Brainaddict said:


> Haha, that's hilarious. "We must make our front grille as aggressive and manly as possible for fear it be seen as a pussy's car." "But we don't need one at all because it's electric." "SHUT UP AND MAKE IT BIGGER."




It's hybrid, so large diesel/petrol engine + a couple of AA batteries.


----------



## Brainaddict (Nov 30, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> It's hybrid, so large diesel/petrol engine + a couple of AA batteries.


Ah, you're right, there was in fact an important reason to design a front that will kill maximum children.


----------



## platinumsage (Nov 30, 2021)

Brainaddict said:


> Ah, you're right, there was in fact an important reason to design a front that will kill maximum children.



I'm sure you know far more than vehicle designers about pedestrian impact surfaces, but BMW have gotten pretty good at designing some of the safest front-ends there are.

The one pictured above hasn't been tested yet but I'd far rather kids stepped out in front of this BMW than in front of almost any other car:


----------



## hash tag (Nov 30, 2021)

You would have difficulty seeing smaller children over the front of that bonnet.


----------



## Leafster (Nov 30, 2021)

hash tag said:


> You would have difficulty seeing smaller children over the front of that bonnet.


I remember riding in a vintage Bentley. I think it was a 4½. It wasn't just small children you couldn't see over the bonnet but whole cars!


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 3, 2021)




----------



## hash tag (Dec 14, 2021)

Eureka, i have discovered why people want tractors in London. I'm watching motor pickers and the bloke wants n electric car for 59-69k. Car 1 is a large Audi SUV. He says it will be perfect for dealing with pot holes. So there you have it.


----------



## Part 2 (Dec 14, 2021)

Motorist jailed for running over cyclist who spat on his car
					

Alan Moult, 74, jailed for 18 months after road rage incident that broke Nick Cook’s pelvis and ribs




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 14, 2021)

hash tag said:


> Eureka, i have discovered why people want tractors in London. I'm watching motor pickers and the bloke wants n electric car for 59-69k. Car 1 is a large Audi SUV. He says it will be perfect for dealing with pot holes. So there you have it.



The amount of brutal traffic calming they've installed round my way I'm starting to think they have a point.


----------



## hash tag (Dec 14, 2021)

This is a fine example and often gets em. I once saw a person turn left on to the bridge, got stressed by the width restrictions and went around them in the other side of the road ( this is in Chelsea).


----------



## T & P (Dec 14, 2021)

hash tag said:


> This is a fine example and often gets em. I once saw a person turn left on to the bridge, got stressed by the width restrictions and went around them in the other side of the road ( this is in Chelsea).
> View attachment 300842


This is on my commute home every day. It’s a bloody nightmare, in particular the traffic turning left onto the bridge from the Chelsea Embankment road.

To be fair most of the vehicles that get properly stuck are not SUVs but white vans or small trucks. Some of them were clearly not familiar with area & not paying attention to the signage, as their vehicle would have not been able to squeeze through the bollards at all. Others however are the typical entitled selfish white van cunts who will happily manoeuvre back and forth for a good half a minute until they have it aligned and can inch forward. Fucking up the local traffic in the process, and all because using Battersea Bridge a mere few hundred metres down the road would add a whole three minutes to their journey.

Anyway, I’d be in favour of removing the bollards, and introducing cameras and instant fines for unauthorised vehicles. Also banning left turns onto the bridge for anything wider then Golf.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 14, 2021)

Part 2 said:


> Motorist jailed for running over cyclist who spat on his car
> 
> 
> Alan Moult, 74, jailed for 18 months after road rage incident that broke Nick Cook’s pelvis and ribs
> ...




This should be in driving standards, but why is that not attempted murder with ~10 years?


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 14, 2021)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> This should be in driving standards, but why is that not attempted murder with ~10 years?



Only banned for 3 years as well. Although he's rather old.


----------



## DownwardDog (Dec 14, 2021)

Murdered out, slammed, widebody RR Dawn. Should hate it but don't.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 14, 2021)

DownwardDog said:


> Murdered out, slammed, widebody RR Dawn. Should hate it but don't.




Another car that would look good in WA, but look like a cunt in Dorset.


----------



## nick (Dec 15, 2021)

hash tag said:


> This is a fine example and often gets em. I once saw a person turn left on to the bridge, got stressed by the width restrictions and went around them in the other side of the road ( this is in Chelsea).
> View attachment 300842


Regrettably I think it also has a weight limit. I had a friend with access to a Bentley 8 (he was the chauffeur) - Even if he could get it through the gap, it was too heavy for the bridge (2.3 Tonnes > 2 tonnes) 




T & P said:


> .... Battersea Bridge a mere few hundred metres down the road would add a whole three twenty minutes to their journey.
> 
> .


fixed it for you


----------



## hash tag (Dec 15, 2021)

nick said:


> Regrettably I think it also has a weight limit. I had a friend with access to a Bentley 8 (he was the chauffeur) - Even if he could get it through the gap, it was too heavy for the bridge (2.3 Tonnes > 2 tonnes)
> 
> 
> fixed it for you


I gather electric cars can be on the heavy side


----------



## T & P (Dec 15, 2021)

nick said:


> fixed it for you


IME that's not the case at all. In particular when you bear in mind that there is almost always a queue to turn left onto Albert Bridge from the embankment anyway. Admittedly clearing the bridge and driving away faster than doing so at the nearby Battersea Bridge, but it doesn't equate to more than a very few extra minutes.


----------



## T & P (Dec 15, 2021)

Whilst on the subject of Chelsea, the new Land Rover Defenders have started popping up around the place. God they're ugly...


----------



## hash tag (Dec 15, 2021)

Restrictions on the Albert - They had barriers on Hammersmith to restrict the flow of traffic; what happened to those 
Then there is the barrier between Townmead Road and Harbour Avenue which is manned 24/7 and they will not let unauthorised vehicles through come what may.
Imagine what it would do for the cruise if they took the restrictions on the Albert away ( I can remember the big yanks doing a circuit that included Chelsea and Albert)


----------



## Leafster (Jan 8, 2022)

I think it had a minor overheating problem


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 8, 2022)

Leafster said:


> I think it had a minor overheating problem
> 
> View attachment 305049





Socket set, can of WD40 and some T-Cut, be good as new.


----------



## A380 (Jan 8, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Socket set, can of WD40 and some T-Cut, be good as new.


Well it is a Range Rover so it’s reliability will only be slightly impacted…


----------



## T & P (Jan 8, 2022)

Great opportunity to convert it to an electric vehicle though!


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 9, 2022)

none of that wiring and plumbing in the engine bay worked anyway, the owner could probably still drive it home and not see any difference


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jan 9, 2022)

A380 said:


> Well it is a Range Rover so it’s reliability will only be slightly impacted…



What they've done there has probably made it more likely to work properly than it was when it left the factory.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jan 9, 2022)




----------



## DownwardDog (Jan 11, 2022)

I feel like BMW are now just doing things specifically to annoy Urban and I wholeheartedly approve.


----------



## hash tag (Jan 11, 2022)

A chameleon that changes colour in order to try and hide itself from the authorities Etc.


----------



## Leafster (Jan 17, 2022)




----------



## dessiato (Jan 17, 2022)

Leafster said:


>



Reviews of the Panda 4x4 say it’s a very capable car. Looks like it is from this.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jan 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Reviews of the Panda 4x4 say it’s a very capable car. Looks like it is from this.


It’s a great car, and the perfect answer to twats who insist they “need” a 4x4.


----------



## HAL9000 (Jan 17, 2022)

Leafster said:


>




or get yourself some snow socks


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jan 17, 2022)

Leafster said:


>





That is word for word from The Parable of The Kabbes


----------



## kabbes (Jan 17, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> That is word for word from The Parable of The Kabbes


I’d say that somebody has been filming me around these parts one of these last winters but mine is a horrendous vomit yellow colour because I was too cheap to pay out for a custom colour.


----------



## weltweit (Jan 18, 2022)

Leafster said:


>



That is simply hilarious  

A bog standard Renault or something, no matter what tyres, pisses over the pride of the Chelsea Tractor Set


----------



## weltweit (Jan 18, 2022)

dp


----------



## dessiato (Jan 18, 2022)

weltweit said:


> That is simply hilarious
> 
> A bog standard Renault or something, no matter what tyres, pisses over the pride of the Chelsea Tractor Set


It's a Fiat Panda 4x4


----------



## weltweit (Jan 18, 2022)

dessiato said:


> It's a Fiat Panda 4x4


even better .. cheapo budget Fiat 4wd car beats mega 4wd Range Rover bus on a little snowy incline .. 

Perhaps the Fiat should have offered the Range Rover a tow


----------



## not-bono-ever (Jan 19, 2022)

I heart 4x4 pandas - they are Steyr built IIRC?   I do remember a back to back test done in the late 80s with a panda and a RR off road in some car mag- the panda shit on the RR that cost about 8x the price. the electrics on the fiat are probably on par with the RR TBF

I would get a old panda in a heartbeat but ULEZ and shit in London


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 19, 2022)

Had one as a works car. They really are good in the snow and ice. Could have done with a bigger engine for the hills though.


----------



## Part 2 (Jan 19, 2022)

Ogmios buys a 4x4 Panda in episode 4 of the new BBC4 series...









						Zen Motoring - Series 1: 4. Milton Keynes
					

Ogmios explores life as a scooter boy and meets an old friend in Milton Keynes.




					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## DownwardDog (Feb 5, 2022)

Dual dually Chev Silverado with a Cadillac Escalade grill.


----------



## rubbershoes (Feb 5, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Dual dually Chev Silverado with a Cadillac Escalade grill.



Perfect for weddings and fun shows


----------



## High Voltage (Feb 5, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Dual dually Chev Silverado with a Cadillac Escalade grill.


Overall I quite like this. Shocking choice for wheels though

I do wonder how much of the bed is usable with the dually wheel wells


----------



## hash tag (Feb 5, 2022)

You could fit a hot tub in the back.


----------



## hash tag (Feb 8, 2022)

This is a shocker. £15,000 for a cat C write off from 1982 and hand painted! RESERVE LOWERED -1982 Mercedes-Benz G-Wagon For Sale By Auction | Car And Classic


----------



## hash tag (Feb 9, 2022)

Last but not least


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 13, 2022)

26 minutes so far….


----------



## hash tag (Feb 13, 2022)

Where else is there for posting crap cars. It's a Tesla. A pink one


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Feb 13, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Last but not least
> View attachment 309452


Christ almighty, Enzo would not approve.


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 1, 2022)

The sensitively named 'Apocalypse Hellfire' 6x6 Jeep conversion.


----------



## High Voltage (Mar 1, 2022)

There now follows a genuine question

Looking at the tyres on the jeep conversion above. TO MY EYE they look on backwards. I know they're not but they look like they'd grip better ie dig in if the V of the tread was going the other way. It's the same with tractors the V points backwards

Why am I wrong. Or is it simply I just am


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 1, 2022)

High Voltage said:


> There now follows a genuine question
> 
> Looking at the tyres on the jeep conversion above. TO MY EYE they look on backwards. I know they're not but they look like they'd grip better ie dig in if the V of the tread was going the other way. It's the same with tractors the V points backwards
> 
> Why am I wrong. Or is it simply I just am



The pattern of grooves is designed to clear water off the wheels, not to 'dig in' to the ground.


----------



## High Voltage (Mar 1, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> The pattern of grooves is designed to clear water off the wheels, not to 'dig in' to the ground.


But tractor tyres are oriented the same way

OK the jeep isn't a great example. Just refer in this case to tractors tyres where dispersal of water at speed isn't a requirement but getting grip / digging in very much is


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 1, 2022)

High Voltage said:


> But tractor tyres are oriented the same way
> 
> OK the jeep isn't a great example. Just refer in this case to tractors tyres where dispersal of water at speed isn't a requirement but getting grip / digging in very much is



You don't actually want tyres to dig up the ground though, you want them to flatten it to improve traction. Traction comes from weight, ie downward force, rather than any lateral force exerted by the tyres.

Think of a train, which has smooth wheels on smooth rails but still creates traction just by being really heavy. It fundamentally doesn't work above a certain gradient mind you, as too big a fraction of the weight force will be pulling the train backwards. This is where the increased friction gives tyres an advantage, but still that friction won't be there if you dig away the surface under you as you apply force.


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 1, 2022)

High Voltage said:


> There now follows a genuine question
> 
> Looking at the tyres on the jeep conversion above. TO MY EYE they look on backwards. I know they're not but they look like they'd grip better ie dig in if the V of the tread was going the other way. It's the same with tractors the V points backwards
> 
> Why am I wrong. Or is it simply I just am



This thing will have so much mechanical grip form its vast contact patches that the tyre orientation will be irrelevant.


----------



## A380 (Mar 1, 2022)

It’s to confuse people who are really bad at tracking things. They would follow the arrows on the ground and do go the wrong way. It’s like those Clarke’s animal footprint shoes…


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 4, 2022)

Jesus suffering fuck, twat tags are as their name suggests the mark of a twat, but on my walk to the pub just now we have these two fuckers…

Letting the world know he doesn’t pay for his kids…






Use a Johnnie if you sleep with this guy…


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Mar 4, 2022)

Grim.


----------



## 2hats (Mar 4, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Use a Johnnie if you sleep with this guy…
> 
> View attachment 312839


Could be a computer geek.


----------



## ska invita (Mar 4, 2022)

i dont understand this one ??


----------



## kebabking (Mar 4, 2022)

ska invita said:


> View attachment 312844
> i dont understand this one ??



It's CSA fuck you. Could be something entirely unrelated to CSA I suppose - but this is a thread where we indulge our prejudices against those with twat tags


----------



## Elpenor (Mar 4, 2022)

He should update it to CM5 FU


----------



## hash tag (Mar 8, 2022)

The tyre extinguishers leaves SUV drivers rather deflated Tyre Extinguishers: Hundreds of SUVs have tyres deflated by activists


----------



## ska invita (Mar 8, 2022)

hash tag said:


> The tyre extinguishers leaves SUV drivers rather deflated Tyre Extinguishers: Hundreds of SUVs have tyres deflated by activists
> 
> 
> View attachment 313407


nice of them to leave an email address
id like to see the state of their inbox
"if you would like to contest this deflation please write to the ombudsman at fuckyourfatcar@protonmail.com"


----------



## hash tag (Mar 8, 2022)

Tim and Fuzz have been waxing lyrical over 


A range rover! 

Enjoy


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 9, 2022)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 16, 2022)

Yep, we were right.






MIRROR.CO.UK
Stranger leaves car on family's driveway near Manchester Airport for days


----------



## dessiato (Mar 16, 2022)

mx wcfc said:


> Yep, we were right.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Because it restricted access to the property and for moving his bins, could the property owner have just walked over/on the vehicle? Could he have dragged his bins over it? The owner might have been very angry, but should have made sure it was parked properly and securely. If it was a rogue company then wouldn’t they have had to compensate for any damage incurred while the vehicle was in their care?


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 16, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Because it restricted access to the property and for moving his bins, could the property owner have just walked over/on the vehicle? Could he have dragged his bins over it? The owner might have been very angry, but should have made sure it was parked properly and securely. If it was a rogue company then wouldn’t they have had to compensate for any damage incurred while the vehicle was in their care?


I'd have blocked it in somehow


----------



## dessiato (Mar 16, 2022)

mx wcfc said:


> I'd have blocked it in somehow


I’ve been looking at this. We have someone who parks on a small piece of our land alongside our stable. They block our access completely. According to Scottish Police it’s not criminal, but the vehicle can be towed, eventually. We can do little about it except report it. I need to find a way of getting revenge, legally. So far I’m tempted to leave a screw or nail against the tyres so it punctures them. But if this caused an accident I’d never be able to live with myself.


----------



## nogojones (Mar 16, 2022)

mx wcfc said:


> Yep, we were right.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


An ex lives down by the City ground and a couple of times on match day she's come back to find a random car on her drive. When she caught an owner, they told her that they'd booked the drive online, so someone has been advertising her drive as private parking for football matches


----------



## Dogsauce (Mar 16, 2022)

Yes, there’s websites where you can book parking on driveways and in garages, we’ve used one before when visiting London. I guess there might be a scam here similar to those fake airbnb listings that occasionally rip people off, sell off parking on someone else’s drive and pocket the cash. Or it could just be a fuckwit driver with a legit booking who parked in the wrong drive.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 16, 2022)

dessiato said:


> mx wcfc said:
> 
> 
> > Yep, we were right.
> ...



I'd stick a tow rope on it and drag it into the road.


----------



## T & P (Mar 16, 2022)

I'd have collected as many dog turds as possible (already in bags from a nearby dog poop bin), open the bags and deposit them all the over the bodywork. If the owner makes a complaint to the police, they can try to arrest the dogs.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 16, 2022)

ska invita said:


> nice of them to leave an email address
> id like to see the state of their inbox
> "if you would like to contest this deflation please write to the ombudsman at fuckyourfatcar@protonmail.com"



I'd set up the email account to always send an automated 'out of office' reply. Only instead of 'out of office' it would say, 'lol, go fuck yourself'.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 16, 2022)

mx wcfc said:


> Yep, we were right.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




It will be a dodgy parking firm rather than the car owner that did that, £100 for four days parking in a ‘secure parking facility with CCTV cover’ happens all the time around Sipson.


----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 16, 2022)

dessiato said:


> I’ve been looking at this. We have someone who parks on a small piece of our land alongside our stable. They block our access completely. According to Scottish Police it’s not criminal, but the vehicle can be towed, eventually. We can do little about it except report it. I need to find a way of getting revenge, legally. So far I’m tempted to leave a screw or nail against the tyres so it punctures them. But if this caused an accident I’d never be able to live with myself.




get a load of gravel delivered that blocks them in


----------



## dessiato (Mar 16, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> get a load of gravel delivered that blocks them in


That's a great idea. We plan to improve the hardstanding so we'd have a good excuse. But we'd not be able to get past their car, to open the gates, to move the gravel. Their car stops us from opening the gates which open outwards.

I love this idea.


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> That's a great idea. We plan to improve the hardstanding so we'd have a good excuse. But we'd not be able to get past their car, to open the gates, to move the gravel. Their car stops us from opening the gates which open outwards.
> 
> I love this idea.


Install some sort of spikes? Accidentally throw a brick through their window .


----------



## High Voltage (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> That's a great idea. We plan to improve the hardstanding so we'd have a good excuse. But we'd not be able to get past their car, to open the gates, to move the gravel. Their car stops us from opening the gates which open outwards.
> 
> I love this idea.


Gates, you say. The sort of gates that need painting?

Terrible thing over spray, can blow anywhere, especially if a breeze is blowing in a direction


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

would be absolute terrible if a load of gravel kept being thrown up against the side of his car “from passing traffic”


----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2022)

This is what I mean. (This car is ours though). A car parked here means you can't open the gates. The patch of land the car is on is ours.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2022)

BigMoaner said:


> would be absolute terrible if a load of gravel kept being thrown up against the side of his car “from passing traffic”


There's no passing traffic.


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> This is what I mean. (This car is ours though). A car parked here means you can't open the gates. The patch of land the car is on is ours.
> 
> View attachment 314695


Arsehole


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

The driver not u


----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2022)

BigMoaner said:


> Arsehole


That car is ours...


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> That car is ours...


Was referring to the other driver


----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2022)

It'll get worse. The village is getting new parking restrictions which will mean we have to park at the back, alongside the stable, because the front will be double yellows.

I should get a Range Rover


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

Get a couple of local lumps to have a word


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

“No parking, vehicles will be clamped” sign?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> It'll get worse. The village is getting new parking restrictions which will mean we have to park at the back, alongside the stable, because the front will be double yellows.
> 
> I should get a Range Rover



Imagine not being able to leave your shit lying around on public property. Oppression, that's what it is.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> Imagine not being able to leave your shit lying around on public property. Oppression, that's what it is.


It's not public land. It's ours.



BigMoaner said:


> “No parking, vehicles will be clamped” sign?


Can't clamp cars in Scotland, unless you're the police or council.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> It's not public land. It's ours.
> 
> 
> Can't clamp cars in Scotland, unless you're the police or council.



Same in the UK England. Private company clamping was banned about 10 years ago.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 17, 2022)

Spymaster said:


> Same in the UK. Private company clamping was banned about 10 years ago.



Scotchland is in the UK (for now, anyway)


----------



## hash tag (Mar 17, 2022)

hash tag said:


> The tyre extinguishers leaves SUV drivers rather deflated Tyre Extinguishers: Hundreds of SUVs have tyres deflated by activists
> 
> 
> View attachment 313407


From the motoring press








						Extremism Won't Motivate Anyone... - Car & Classic Magazine
					

Our Editor, Chris Pollitt, is not a fan of extremism. And that's not great, as the people who are seem to be looking at cars, now...




					www.carandclassic.com


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 17, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Scotchland is in the UK (for now, anyway)



Och aye. Post edited.

Pedant.


----------



## nogojones (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> I’ve been looking at this. We have someone who parks on a small piece of our land alongside our stable. They block our access completely. According to Scottish Police it’s not criminal, but the vehicle can be towed, eventually. We can do little about it except report it. I need to find a way of getting revenge, legally. So far I’m tempted to leave a screw or nail against the tyres so it punctures them. But if this caused an accident I’d never be able to live with myself.


Have you spoken to the owner?


----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2022)

nogojones said:


> Have you spoken to the owner?


Haven't found them, yet.


----------



## nogojones (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Haven't found them, yet.


If it were me, I'd leave a note on their window explaining the problem, because people are stupid and they might not realise that they are a problem.

If that fails I'd then start the campaign of their car never working again.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2022)

nogojones said:


> If it were me, I'd leave a note on their window explaining the problem, because people are stupid and they might not realise that they are a problem.
> 
> If that fails I'd then start the campaign of their car never working again.


Done the first part. Now to the second.

I think it all came about because the f-i-l didn't use the back after he stopped driving.

It's very difficult to see the gates from the house, and you can't see the other side at all.


----------



## nogojones (Mar 17, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Done the first part. Now to the second.
> 
> I think it all came about because the f-i-l didn't use the back after he stopped driving.
> 
> It's very difficult to see the gates from the house, and you can't see the other side at all.


Spray-paint a big Z on their bonnet


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

Cook pass bartridge


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 17, 2022)

It now says cook where it once said COCK


----------



## nogojones (Mar 17, 2022)

hash tag said:


> From the motoring press
> 
> 
> 
> ...


This rage makes me warm to tyre extinguishers a bit more.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 18, 2022)

Since our village became a popular weekend visiting spot, one particular couple often found some wanker had parked in their little drive, which is away from their house but has a little garage at its end, so it’s very obvious that it’s a private drive. When confronted, people say things like, “I was only there for a few hours” and “you can still access your garage” (which means on foot rather than get in and out of it and is incorrect anyway).  So he bought a wheel clamp. When they eventually come round to his house, if they are apologetic, which is never, he would just unlock it. But when they inevitably start shouting at him in self-entitled rage, he calmly goes out back and gets his shotgun. He doesn’t demand any money or anything, just tells them that they can come back for their car tomorrow.  Don’t mess with country folk.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 18, 2022)

kabbes said:


> Since our village became a popular weekend visiting spot, one particular couple often found some wanker had parked in their little drive, which is away from their house but has a little garage at its end, so it’s very obvious that it’s a private drive. When confronted, people say things like, “I was only there for a few hours” and “you can still access your garage” (which means on foot rather than get in and out of it and is incorrect anyway).  So he bought a wheel clamp. When they eventually come round to his house, if they are apologetic, which is never, he would just unlock it. But when they inevitably start shouting at him in self-entitled rage, he calmly goes out back and gets his shotgun. He doesn’t demand any money or anything, just tells them that they can come back for their car tomorrow.  Don’t mess with country folk.


I don't have a shotgun.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 18, 2022)

dessiato said:


> I don't have a shotgun.


There’s your problem right there


----------



## High Voltage (Mar 18, 2022)

dessiato said:


> I don't have a shotgun.


No, but you could easily and legally get an air rifle. If trained armed police can't tell the difference you can bet your bottom dollar that Mr Rage(sic) Rover won't


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Mar 30, 2022)

After a long wait it's finally here, get your orders in quick...


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 30, 2022)

dessiato said:


> This is what I mean. (This car is ours though). A car parked here means you can't open the gates. The patch of land the car is on is ours.
> 
> View attachment 314695



Just drive a couple of star shaped steel fence posts into the ground. Cut them off at 300mm if you want them to drive into them and fuck their car.


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 30, 2022)

kabbes said:


> Since our village became a popular weekend visiting spot, one particular couple often found some wanker had parked in their little drive, which is away from their house but has a little garage at its end, so it’s very obvious that it’s a private drive. When confronted, people say things like, “I was only there for a few hours” and “you can still access your garage” (which means on foot rather than get in and out of it and is incorrect anyway).  So he bought a wheel clamp. When they eventually come round to his house, if they are apologetic, which is never, he would just unlock it. But when they inevitably start shouting at him in self-entitled rage, he calmly goes out back and gets his shotgun. He doesn’t demand any money or anything, just tells them that they can come back for their car tomorrow.  Don’t mess with country folk.



Anybody normal would call the Old Bill at that point and he'd get locked up.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 30, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Anybody normal would call the Old Bill at that point and he'd get locked up.


What for, precisely?  And what happens when the Old Bill start asking the complainant why he was trespassing on somebody else’s land, i.e. parking on somebody’s drive?


----------



## dessiato (Mar 30, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> After a long wait it's finally here, get your orders in quick...
> 
> View attachment 316426


Four door, SUV, Lotus! No.

But the other cars in the range are gorgeous


----------



## youbeauty (Mar 30, 2022)

kabbes said:


> What for, precisely?  And what happens when the Old Bill start asking the complainant why he was trespassing on somebody else’s land, i.e. parking on somebody’s drive?


I'd say Possession of firearm with intent to cause fear of violence (Firearms Act 1968) would be a start. And trespass is a civil offence AFAIK.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 30, 2022)

youbeauty said:


> I'd say Possession of firearm with intent to cause fear of violence (Firearms Act 1968) would be a start. And trespass is a civil offence AFAIK.


Holding it calmly in response to somebody coming to your front door to shout at and threaten you?  Yeah, good luck making that stick.


----------



## youbeauty (Mar 30, 2022)

I'm pretty sure a call along the lines of "Hello, is that the police? Someone's clamped my car and, when I went to talk to them about it, they brought a shotgun to the door" would get a fairly swift response. What other purpose would holding the gun serve other than to threaten violence? If it's not to threaten, what benefit does your neighbour gain from holding it? Parking in someone's driveway is a shit thing to do, but bringing guns into a dispute is orders of magnitude worse.


----------



## Chilli.s (Mar 30, 2022)

Yeah I recon that would be the quickest way to loose your shotgun licence


----------



## kabbes (Mar 30, 2022)

So eventually the police turn up, ask if you clamped some guy's car, you say, "yes, because he parked on my drive" and then you go and unclamp it.  The guy has still lost a shit load of time waiting for his car to be unclamped and the police aren't going to do anything more.  At most, they'll say, "did you threaten him with a gun" and you say "no" and they say, "oh, ok then".  

It helps in all this if you are an energy broker who went to Rugby and had the Middletons at your wedding, of course.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 30, 2022)

kabbes said:


> Holding it calmly in response to somebody coming to your front door to shout at and threaten you?  Yeah, good luck making that stick.



He would be in deep shit, tbf. 

If someone complained, the minimum he could expect is a visit from plod and a thorough bollocking. That's if they're feeling generous. Otherwise he can expect to lose his shotgun certificate or even find himself on threat charges. 

If I take mine out even in the house I draw the curtains to avoid any silliness. The police take an extremely dim view of uncovered guns, and if he's getting it out in response to someone on his doorstep, he's ratcheting-up the stakes immeasurably.


----------



## nogojones (Mar 30, 2022)

kabbes said:


> It helps in all this if you are an energy broker


Is that the same thing as the lightworkers I see on facebook?


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 30, 2022)

dessiato said:


> This is what I mean. (This car is ours though). A car parked here means you can't open the gates. The patch of land the car is on is ours.
> 
> View attachment 314695


Argh it’s so cunty tho look at it. BANG!


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 30, 2022)

I’m joking of course. I think.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 30, 2022)

BigMoaner said:


> Argh it’s so cunty tho look at it. BANG!


I know. It’s a C1. It was only a rental so no big issue.

I suppose we could go into the stable through the black door, through it, and out through the other door in the stable which is the other side of the gate.


----------



## DownwardDog (Mar 31, 2022)

kabbes said:


> At most, they'll say, "did you threaten him with a gun" and you say "no" and they say, "oh, ok then".



That is not what would happen as anybody who has had a firearms license will attest.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 1, 2022)

We are in knutsford and Mrs tag just said she has never seen so many Chelsea tractors.
NB. Many of them are blinged and/or have very expensive personal registration plates.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 2, 2022)

kabbes said:


> Since our village became a popular weekend visiting spot, one particular couple often found some wanker had parked in their little drive, which is away from their house but has a little garage at its end, so it’s very obvious that it’s a private drive. When confronted, people say things like, “I was only there for a few hours” and “you can still access your garage” (which means on foot rather than get in and out of it and is incorrect anyway).  So he bought a wheel clamp. When they eventually come round to his house, if they are apologetic, which is never, he would just unlock it. But when they inevitably start shouting at him in self-entitled rage, he calmly goes out back and gets his shotgun. He doesn’t demand any money or anything, just tells them that they can come back for their car tomorrow.  Don’t mess with country folk.



Oh so this'd be the _good _kind of threatenting to shoot people then. I see. Because normally, someone who did that would be a dangerous areshole who shouldn't be left in charge of his own shoes never mind a firearm. But if there's a parking space involved then yeah obviously he's a massive hero.


----------



## likesfish (Apr 3, 2022)

got cheered putting a ticket on a new Ford ranger which was immaculate if you own a pick-up truck it should have stuff in the back because you do work.
 if it's immaculate your a wrong en.


----------



## A380 (Apr 4, 2022)

Just let down two tyres. It’s not criminal damage or  interfering with a motor vehicle. And a real pain in the arse if they haven’t got a mini compressor tyre inflator.


----------



## DownwardDog (Apr 12, 2022)

RR Cullinan with a lift kit and roof tent.


----------



## High Voltage (Apr 12, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> RR Cullinan with a lift kit and roof tent.


I'll freely admit to being a bit of a sucker for most, if not all of the, how shall I say, more "specialised" vehicles that DD often posts pictures of. But this one? Probably not so, I'd rather just have the money to buy something else and put more lasers and machine guns on it


----------



## keybored (Apr 12, 2022)

dylanredefined said:


> It is a strange car not exactly sure what goes through the mind of someone who buys one.


Ideally an ice pick.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Apr 12, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> RR Cullinan with a lift kit and roof tent.


Christ almighty


----------



## T & P (Apr 12, 2022)

Lose the stupid bullbar, and it's not that bad actually. I hope the next time I visit Wadi Rum they have them


----------



## steeplejack (Apr 12, 2022)




----------



## DownwardDog (Apr 12, 2022)

I would 100% daily a Sable Grey Cullinan if I had the money. They are great.


----------



## nick (Apr 13, 2022)

Sick puppy that I am I quite like that RR (sorry)
It certainly feels more appropriate than  the ones tootling around the west end


----------



## hash tag (Apr 13, 2022)

High Voltage said:


> I'll freely admit to being a bit of a sucker for most, if not all of the, how shall I say, more "specialised" vehicles that DD often posts pictures of. But this one? Probably not so, I'd rather just have the money to buy something else and put more lasers and machine guns on it


For the £200 or whatever the Cullinan costs, I am sure you could buy a very decent motor home.


----------



## BigMoaner (Apr 13, 2022)

steeplejack said:


> View attachment 318212View attachment 318211


gotta admit though, tent on top of a car aint a bad idea.


----------



## BigMoaner (Apr 13, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> RR Cullinan with a lift kit and roof tent.


teh thing is it would have to be in the middle of the desert. can't imagine hosting that bastard up in a side road in camberwell and having a restful nights sleep


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 13, 2022)

To divert the thread slightly, this is why Winchester residents need a 4x4.  Fuck sale, it wasn’t even a tight parking space.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 15, 2022)

Check out the matching wheels


----------



## dessiato (Apr 15, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Check out the matching wheels
> View attachment 318656


My car wheels match too.


----------



## hash tag (Apr 15, 2022)

dessiato said:


> My car wheels match too.


Like that 😱


----------



## dessiato (Apr 15, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Like that 😱


No. They’re all the same colour as each other


----------



## Chilli.s (Apr 15, 2022)

Mine do too, dirty and scratched (but 4 new tyres)


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Apr 16, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Check out the matching wheels
> View attachment 318656




What do you expect when you go to Staines?


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 16, 2022)

mx wcfc said:


> To divert the thread slightly, this is why Winchester residents need a 4x4.  Fuck sale, it wasn’t even a tight parking space. View attachment 318422



Has the pub been renamed? I don't remember it from when I lived there


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 16, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> Has the pub been renamed? I don't remember it from when I lived there


Not in the time I've known it.  It's ticked away in Hyde, on my way to the football ground, in that little collection of victorian terraces where every road is Arthur/Egbert/Alfred/Birinus/Saxon etc Road.


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 16, 2022)

mx wcfc said:


> Not in the time I've known it.  It's ticked away in Hyde, on my way to the football ground, in that little collection of victorian terraces where every road is Arthur/Egbert/Alfred/Birinus/Saxon etc Road.



Ah. Not my side of town.  I was up on  St Giles Hill. Usually went to the Rising Sun or Black Boy


----------



## hash tag (Apr 21, 2022)

Deller's a good day for cyclists Deller's 'Magic' Venice exhibition


----------



## hash tag (Apr 26, 2022)

I know this is not a car but I did spot it on a cullinan while out on an early evening walk over in Chelsea.


----------



## kabbes (Apr 28, 2022)

The number plate for an angry dog.


----------



## hash tag (May 4, 2022)

How did I miss this, Hummers are back. They are electric and can crab....https://www.carwow.co.uk/news/4860/hummer-ev-electric-suv-price-specs-release-date


----------



## DownwardDog (May 4, 2022)

GM have quit all RHD markets though...


----------



## kebabking (May 4, 2022)

Tragic...


----------



## ska invita (May 4, 2022)

im not sure why but ive been watching this crash damaged Range Rover rebuild series  up to pt5 right now



i think its in part two where he takes the dashboard off that my jaw dropped the most  -a nightmare of wiring

the whole thing looks like an expensive nightmare


----------



## Plumdaff (May 13, 2022)

Another happy Land Rover customer


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 13, 2022)

He should be happy, his engine’s done almost twice the mileage of my Freelander when the engine on that went bang.


----------



## hash tag (May 22, 2022)

In the bigger scene of ugliness, ostentatious, etc. You would need to look hard to "better" this Ultra exclusive Rolls-Royce Boat Tail convertible commission floats in | Auto Express


----------



## Dogsauce (May 22, 2022)

What do actual posh people drive thesedays? Rollers, Bentleys etc. are just driven by ghastly types like footballers, landlords and internet twats and are styled to suit their (lack of) taste.  What car/badge has managed to retain a bit of class and distance from this shitfest?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 22, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> What do actual posh people drive thesedays? Rollers, Bentleys etc. are just driven by ghastly types like footballers, landlords and internet twats and are styled to suit their (lack of) taste.  What car/badge has managed to retain a bit of class and distance from this shitfest?




Full fat Range Rovers.


----------



## Dogsauce (May 22, 2022)

Tbh I think Rollers were always a bit twatty, or at least for a few decades, car of choice of TV presenters that had ‘made it’ and needed to show it back in the 70s. I remember seeing Bruce Forsyth in one at a petrol station in the Cotswolds back in the late 70s/early 80s.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (May 22, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> What do actual posh people drive thesedays? Rollers, Bentleys etc. are just driven by ghastly types like footballers, landlords and internet twats and are styled to suit their (lack of) taste.  What car/badge has managed to retain a bit of class and distance from this shitfest?


Actual posh (the type who own half the countryside) drive knackered old land rovers, in my experience at any rate.

Oh, with something like a Bristol for the weekends.


----------



## hippogriff (May 22, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> Tbh I think Rollers were always a bit twatty, or at least for a few decades, car of choice of TV presenters that had ‘made it’ and needed to show it back in the 70s. I remember seeing Bruce Forsyth in one at a petrol station in the Cotswolds back in the late 70s/early 80s.


----------



## hash tag (May 22, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Actual posh (the type who own half the countryside) drive knackered old land rovers, in my experience at any rate.
> 
> Oh, with something like a Bristol for the weekends.


This. They often have little time or interest in cars. Any old thing that gets you for A to B will do.


----------



## T & P (May 23, 2022)

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this thread (as I was already fully aware that Range Rovers are a wanker’s car) is that apparently they are laughably unreliable, and far more so as a supposedly premium brand. So why do they remain so absurdly popular not just with celebrities but as the car of choice of government ministers, PMs and Royals alike? And not just in the UK, where I guess flying the flag might be a factor. You would think reliability would rank high in the requirements of any vehicle considered for ferrying VIPs around.

And they’re fucking ugly as fuck to boot. And portray a look of drug baron/ mafia boss car of choice imo. And they’re not even that spacious. What kind of cunt would choose a RR over an S-500, Beemer 7 or an A8?


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

T & P said:


> If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this thread (as I was already fully aware that Range Rovers are a wanker’s car) is that apparently they are laughably unreliable, and far more so as a supposedly premium brand. So why do they remain so absurdly popular not just with celebrities but as the car of choice of government ministers, PMs and Royals alike? And not just in the UK, where I guess flying the flag might be a factor. You would think reliability would rank high in the requirements of any vehicle considered for ferrying VIPs around.
> 
> And they’re fucking ugly as fuck to boot. And portray a look of drug baron/ mafia boss car of choice imo. And they’re not even that spacious. What kind of cunt would choose a RR over an S-500, Beemer 7 or an A8?


I think this is increasingly true. Many are now using big Mercedes, which are, frankly, the better car.


----------



## kabbes (May 23, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Full fat Range Rovers.


Although, round here it’s Land Rovers. The ones that look like they’re made of tin foil, are incredibly noisy and smelly and break down all the time, but cost some insane level of £££

Mind you, the two poshest people I know — mostly, I see one of them driving a knackered old quad bike and the other driving a knackered old tractor. They both have Land Rovers as well though, of course. It’s like the entry car to the posh club.


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

The poshest people I've known drive Volvo, Jaguar, Audi, Range Rover, Suzuki, BMW, Porsche, Vauxhall, Bristol, all sorts of cars. I'm the only one who drove Bentley, but it was a 1971 T. The modern ones, and RR are not for posh people, they're for footballers and media people.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 23, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> What do actual posh people drive thesedays? Rollers, Bentleys etc. are just driven by ghastly types like footballers, landlords and internet twats and are styled to suit their (lack of) taste.  What car/badge has managed to retain a bit of class and distance from this shitfest?



Dunno about posh but the richest person I personally know (net worth > $A300m) drives a Mk.7 Golf GTI but he does have a very nice Outremer boat that he leaves in the Med.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 23, 2022)

T & P said:


> If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this thread (as I was already fully aware that Range Rovers are a wanker’s car) is that apparently they are laughably unreliable, and far more so as a supposedly premium brand.



They are actually slightly better than they used to be as they, and Jaguar, have finally learnt some production engineering discipline from being owned by Tata.  I reckon 1995-2015 was the absolute nadir when they started getting very complex with many electrical, hydraulic and pneumatic sub-systems but still just chucked together.


----------



## ska invita (May 23, 2022)

kabbes said:


> Mind you, the two poshest people I know — mostly, I see one of them driving a knackered old quad bike and the other driving a knackered old tractor. They both have Land Rovers as well though, of course. It’s like the entry car to the posh club.


sounds like its because these people have land and you need those vehicles (quad, tractor, land rover) to get across the fields, particularly when the earth is wet.


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Dunno about posh but the richest person I personally know (net worth > $A300m) drives a Mk.7 Golf GTI but he does have a very nice Outremer boat that he leaves in the Med.


A friend of mine has an income of about £4 million, he drives a BMW or Range Rover. But his extravagance is collecting Rolex watches.


----------



## ska invita (May 23, 2022)

T & P said:


> And they’re fucking ugly as fuck to boot. And portray a look of drug baron/ mafia boss car of choice imo.


theres a PHD paper to be written about the psychoanalysis of expensive car design and how it maps on their customers - all these modern car designs play on their buyers inner voice which screams out IM A CUNT AND I THINK IM BETTER THAN YOU, from the higher driving position to the scowling face made by the front light and grill.  The mafia boss thing plays into that too - i expect people do consciously or subconsciously think they are some kind of scarface selfmade capitalist hero... Who Put This Thing Together? Me, That's Who!


----------



## Chz (May 23, 2022)

dessiato said:


> I think this is increasingly true. Many are now using big Mercedes, which are, frankly, the better car.


Benz has abominable quality control, I'd say it's much of a muchness between them. Just look at their history in reliability studies, and they're all over the place - some cars are great, the same model next year falls to bits. You want a super-expensive car to show off that doesn't scream "wanker", buy a classic of some sort.


----------



## ska invita (May 23, 2022)

Chz said:


> Benz has abominable quality control, I'd say it's much of a muchness between them. Just look at their history in reliability studies, and they're all over the place - some cars are great, the same model next year falls to bits. You want a super-expensive car to show off that doesn't scream "wanker", buy a classic of some sort.


classic cars really do break down every other trip - i watch antiques road trip and they usually have to change cars after a couple of days

can you post a reliability study? for some reason i am curious


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (May 23, 2022)

ska invita said:


> classic cars really do break down every other trip - i watch antiques road trip and they usually have to change cars after a couple of days
> 
> can you post a reliability study? for some reason i am curious











						Most- and least-reliable car brands revealed
					






					www.carwow.co.uk


----------



## Chz (May 23, 2022)

ska invita said:


> classic cars really do break down every other trip - i watch antiques road trip and they usually have to change cars after a couple of days
> 
> can you post a reliability study? for some reason i am curious


Sorry, I wasn't trying to say classics are more reliable. It was two separate statements about MB's quality control and what you can spend a fortune on and not look _quite _so wanky.

I know full well that today's least reliable cars would top the charts back in the 70s.


----------



## T & P (May 23, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Most- and least-reliable car brands revealed
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I wonder what the reliability score percentage is meant to measure. If a particular car brand is 71% reliable, what does that mean? That 71% of new cars of said brand do not have a mechanical problem during the lifetime of the car warranty, perhaps?


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 23, 2022)

The absolute richest person I deal with ($10bn according to Forbes) doesn't drive. His driver/chief bodyguard has an armoured RS6. 

But rich doesn't = posh.


----------



## Dogsauce (May 23, 2022)

The wealthy people at my school growing up in the 80s (though not very wealthy in the grand scheme of things - no millionaires) usually drove Volvo estates, that seemed to be what the upper middle classes went for, all about safety and comfort.  I guess Audi probably fills that niche now, and not one of the showy ones. Something big enough to keep the labs or lurchers in the back.

Round here (posh but liberal bit of Bristol, like Hampstead) all the people who were driving big vulgar Porsche SUVs last year are in Teslas now.


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

Yup, it's Audi's, Ovlovs, Skoda's, and Mitsubishi, Nissan, Landy and Toyota working waggons for the posh out here in the sticks.

Range Rovers for the _parvenu_....


----------



## T & P (May 23, 2022)

kebabking said:


> Yup, it's Audi's, Ovlovs, Skoda's, and Mitsubishi, Nissan, Landy and Toyota working waggons for the posh out here in the sticks.
> 
> Range Rovers for the _parvenu_....


Only a couple of decades ago, anyone who used the words 'Skoda' and 'posh' in the same sentence would have been laughed out of the room. How times change...


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

T & P said:


> Only a couple of decades ago, anyone who used the words 'Skoda' and 'posh' in the same sentence would have been laughed out of the room. How times change...


A friend of mine had his 4 year old Skoda's gearbox fail, £4k bill. But done for £250 under the warranty. Even so, 4 years old gearbox...


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

I had a turbo go on a Skoda at 12k - which destroyed the engine - but every manufacturer has cars that implode, what matters it's the proportion of cars, and what their attitude is when it happens.

I'd bought it from a main dealer, had it 6 weeks or so and put 5k on it - they simply gave me a full refund.

I've bought another one and it's been excellent.


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

kebabking said:


> I had a turbo go on a Skoda at 12k - which destroyed the engine - but every manufacturer has cars that implode, what matters it's the proportion of cars, and what their attitude is when it happens.
> 
> I'd bought it from a main dealer, had it 6 weeks or so and put 5k on it - they simply gave me a full refund.
> 
> I've bought another one and it's been excellent.


The more I hear about Skoda and their customer care, the more I like them.

One of my sisters had a Fabia for ten years, or maybe a bit more, from new, average mileage, regularly serviced, passed every MoT without problems.


----------



## rubbershoes (May 23, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> What do actual posh people drive thesedays? Rollers, Bentleys etc. are just driven by ghastly types like footballers, landlords and internet twats and are styled to suit their (lack of) taste.  What car/badge has managed to retain a bit of class and distance from this shitfest?


The Duke of Somerset had a Skoda Yeti  a few years ago. It's got a decent boot size and is fairly economical to run. Drives like a brick and is very plasticky inside


----------



## Chilli.s (May 23, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> Drives like a brick and is very plasticky inside


And it looks ugly too


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

Chilli.s said:


> And it looks ugly too



Fing is, how much time do you spend looking at the outside of your car?

There are better looking cars than mine (Skoda Octavia estate) - the Mazda 6 estate for example - but I don't spend much time looking at my car, so it kind of doesn't matter.


----------



## kabbes (May 23, 2022)

I got a Yeti in 2011 and it’s still going strong. It’s been a van by removing its rear seats. It’s gone through the roughest of mountain terrain on holiday. It’s been comfortable on miles and miles of motorways. It’s had good if unspectacular economy. It’s never given me a single moment of trouble.

Yes, it has never been a good looking car but I had an absolutely beautiful Pininferina-designed Fiat Coupe before the Yeti and I can tell you this — it is no contest in terms of which one I have preferred owning.


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

I like a good looking car, but there's more important things than just the looks. For me these are speed, handling, comfort, and enjoyability which really depends entirely on personal interpretation. 

The longest I've ever owned a car is this Astra cabby. I got it to get me to Spain, to run around in before moving it on. Instead, 10 years on, I still like it. It's not fast, handles OK, the looks are conservative. But it does everything I want it to do. Today it passed its ITV again with no problems. I think this is the 4th or 5th without issues. In ten years its only failed maybe twice.


----------



## hash tag (May 23, 2022)

I find it hard to believe some Skoda's have a turbo. They are hardly the choice of a petrol head


----------



## kabbes (May 23, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I find it hard to believe some Skoda's have a turbo. They are hardly the choice of a petrol head


My Yeti has a turbo. It doesn’t make it a car for boy racers.  It just means that it can accelerate to speed comfortably on a motorway.  It’s a diesel and I understand that it’s pretty common to fit a diesel engine with a turbo to overcome its limitations


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I find it hard to believe some Skoda's have a turbo. They are hardly the choice of a petrol head


That's their attraction. The vRS versions are quite quick. Maybe not a boy racer car, but for people like, people who value performance above name, they're a great choice.


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I find it hard to believe some Skoda's have a turbo. They are hardly the choice of a petrol head



Dude, every diesel car built in the last 30 years has a turbo. Most petrol cars have a turbo....


----------



## hash tag (May 23, 2022)

I have barely driven a diesel yet alone owned one and do not aspire to.


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

dessiato said:


> That's their attraction. The vRS versions are quite quick. Maybe not a boy racer car, but for people like, people who value performance above name, they're a great choice.
> 
> View attachment 323853



I've got one.

Goes like shit off a shovel. Worcester to Andover in, well, rather less time than Google thinks it should take....


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I have barely driven a diesel yet alone owned one and do not aspire to.



You've no idea what you're missing...


----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I have barely driven a diesel yet alone owned one and do not aspire to.


Modern diesels are a totally different animal what they were even 10 years ago. They're more fun, and more, well, drivable.


----------



## hash tag (May 23, 2022)

One of our previous work cars was a VW diesel. Nope, really not for me. I remember now doing the full road test thing with a large 5 series diesel ....really noisy engine.


----------



## T & P (May 23, 2022)

Environmental and costs considerations aside, I would certainly choose a manual diesel over an automatic petrol any day of the week, certainly for as a short term period such as a holiday rental.


----------



## T & P (May 23, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Modern diesels are a totally different animal what they were even 10 years ago. They're more fun, and more, well, drivable.


And nowhere near as noisy or polluting as the diesels of yesteryear, if of course still performing worse in those categories than a petrol counterpart.


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

It's different pollutions, init...

Diesels pump out less CO2 than petrols, but more of the nasties that kill people.

Try are _far_ more efficient - so if I drive to see my eldest at uni in Glasgow (600 miles there and back) I'll use about 50 litres of diesel. If I take Mrs K's petrol, driving the same route at the same time, and at the same speed I'd use about 75 litres.

That extra 25 litres has to be pumped out of the ground, refined, transported, stored - All using more energy.


----------



## T & P (May 23, 2022)

To be fair diesels (for cars) have never made much financial sense to me in this country for anyone other than those doing genuinely massive mileages.

In the Continent, or certainly in Spain and a few other nations, diesel cars weren’t particularly more expensive to buy, and more importantly the cost of diesel fuel was cheaper than petrol, at least back in the day. But in this country if you buy a diesel car you need to cancel out higher both purchase prices and prices at the pump. For anyone doing less than 20k+ a year, surely it must take several years before you even break even?


----------



## kebabking (May 23, 2022)

Oh absolutely - modern diesels produce fantastic driving performance and efficiency that few petrols will touch, but they cost more to buy, cost more to fuel, are more complex, and the hated DPF means that if they aren't used as diesels should be - long, fast driving - they'll cost thousands to repair.

They work for me because while I do the school run few times a week, I also do 45 and 85 mile each way commutes on the motorway and fast A roads several times a week, but if you don't do that kind of driving, then a post 2010(?) Diesel isn't for you. 

There's a definite balance to be struck - I think it used to be 15k a year, but I'd say that figure has gone up, it's not just about the figure but the nature of the miles -  a multi-drop driver might well do 30k+, but if they stop and start every mile then they'll probably wreck a diesel in no time.


----------



## teuchter (May 23, 2022)

kebabking said:


> It's different pollutions, init...
> 
> Diesels pump out less CO2 than petrols, but more of the nasties that kill people.
> 
> ...


So does the 50 litres your car uses. If you really cared, you'd get the train.


----------



## kebabking (May 24, 2022)

teuchter said:


> So does the 50 litres your car uses. If you really cared, you'd get the train.



Christ no - trains are full of people like you.


----------



## dessiato (May 24, 2022)

Here turbo diesel cars make a lot of sense because diesel is so much cheaper than petrol, but they're still more expensive to buy.


----------



## Chilli.s (May 24, 2022)

Turbo diesel was found to be the most economic type of engine in studies. Just a pity about all those harmful particulates


----------



## DownwardDog (May 24, 2022)

kebabking said:


> Oh absolutely - modern diesels produce fantastic driving performance and efficiency that few petrols will touch, but they cost more to buy, cost more to fuel, are more complex, and the hated DPF means that if they aren't used as diesels should be - long, fast driving - they'll cost thousands to repair.
> 
> They work for me because while I do the school run few times a week, I also do 45 and 85 mile each way commutes on the motorway and fast A roads several times a week, but if you don't do that kind of driving, then a post 2010(?) Diesel isn't for you.
> 
> There's a definite balance to be struck - I think it used to be 15k a year, but I'd say that figure has gone up, it's not just about the figure but the nature of the miles -  a multi-drop driver might well do 30k+, but if they stop and start every mile then they'll probably wreck a diesel in no time.



I miss the oil burning monsters of the noughties (peak diesel). I had a 2006 E65 745d with a 325hp twin turbo 4.4 diesel V8 and a six speed ZF auto. It was a fantastic car. I once drove it from Frankfurt to Berlin (northern route via Wolfsburg) in 3h 19m without a fuel stop.

It was super complex though and I'd have no interest in owning a 16 year old example.


----------



## Dogsauce (May 24, 2022)

I think we do about 2000 a year in our diesel.

We paid a bit more to get one that was emissions compliant, then found out that the council’s plans here in Bristol are to ban diesels altogether from certain roads rather than just blocking the more polluting versions. Pile of arse.


----------



## kebabking (May 24, 2022)

If I get round to replacing mine this year I'll get one of the last 2020(?) Mazda 6 diesels, but if not I've no idea what I'll do.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 24, 2022)

Just done 3k in 7 days in my derv. 790 miles on the bahns on the last day to catch the ferry. It’s a Skoda- imagine trying to do that in a 3 year old JLR product . Urgh


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 24, 2022)

Anyway, proper wealthy toffs have old battered Volvos. They don’t spunk their Ill gotten gains on shoddy RR shite


----------



## Dogsauce (May 24, 2022)

kebabking said:


> If I get round to replacing mine this year I'll get one of the last 2020(?) Mazda 6 diesels, but if not I've no idea what I'll do.


Good old fashioned estate cars are becoming a scarce thing, and the chunky 4x4 replacements don’t have anything like the space in the rear. I miss our old battered Avensis and the ability to fit a stack of plasterboard or a dismantled wardrobe in the back.


----------



## Dogsauce (May 24, 2022)

Btw, all the liberal elite of childbearing age around here seem to have day vans alongside whatever runabout they maintain. Extra points for extensive bike racks on the rear.


----------



## kebabking (May 24, 2022)

Dogsauce yeah, that sounds familiar....

Mrs Bot has one of these crossover things, and while it's reasonably pleasant to drive/be in, it's boot is pitiful. Fuel economy is crap as well.


----------



## hash tag (May 25, 2022)

LOOK.  AT.   ME.    ( Check those wheels. An every day production car). This was outside the hotel we were staying at. 



Spoiler: Care


----------



## dessiato (May 25, 2022)

The wheels are the least offensive part of that. Even so, they need a refurb


----------



## DownwardDog (May 25, 2022)

dessiato said:


> The wheels are the least offensive part of that.



They've been curbed to fuck; that's pretty offensive.

Urus has been a great success for Lambo. It's just overtaken the Gallardo to become the best selling Lamborghini ever.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 25, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> They've been curbed to fuck; that's pretty offensive.
> 
> Urus has been a great success for Lambo. It's just overtaken the Gallardo to become the best selling Lamborghini ever.



If I had £1/4m and was in the market for an SUV, I'd be right in there. Maybe a more subtle paintjob though.


----------



## T & P (May 25, 2022)

Is that number reg plate legal? I thought they had to to be rectangular or squre in shape, without any funny angles in the corners like that one has.


----------



## hash tag (May 25, 2022)

It might not be legal because the spacing is not correct and I doubt the manufacturers details are on it.


----------



## Spymaster (May 25, 2022)

kebabking said:


> Most petrol cars have a turbo....



Or two


----------



## kabbes (May 25, 2022)

It reminds me that Lamborghini got their start making tractors


----------



## kebabking (May 25, 2022)

kabbes said:


> It reminds me that Lamborghini got their start making tractors



As seen with Clarkson on his farm.


----------



## hash tag (May 25, 2022)

kabbes said:


> It reminds me that Lamborghini got their start making tractors


This type of porn does not really belong here 🙄


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 25, 2022)

kabbes said:


> It reminds me that Lamborghini got their start making tractors




Legend has it the owner was pissed off that his Ferrari was so unreliable that he set out to make an even more unreliable car.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (May 26, 2022)

T & P said:


> Is that number reg plate legal? I thought they had to to be rectangular or squre in shape, without any funny angles in the corners like that one has.


Pretty much every single after market plate you see is illegal. I know a traffic cop, they use them as an excuse to pull over vehicles they have suspicions about. More often than not they then find more serious offences to pick them up with.


----------



## platinumsage (May 26, 2022)

The worst thing about that car is the bad parking.


----------



## ska invita (May 26, 2022)

Range rovers are worse


----------



## dessiato (May 26, 2022)

I think I’ll buy a RR to go with my Barbour, and red trousers. I’ll need some Hunters of course. Just to irritate some board members. I’ll have to get a fuck off sized tow bar to pull a boat out of the water, and join the Royal Yacht Club.


----------



## DownwardDog (May 26, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Pretty much every single after market plate you see is illegal. I know a traffic cop, they use them as an excuse to pull over vehicles they have suspicions about. More often than not they then find more serious offences to pick them up with.



Most cops are as thick as fuck and don't actually know the rules. It's legal to use a smaller number plate (64mm characters) on a motorbike but cops don't know this so people are riding around with print outs of the regs in their jackets.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 26, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Pretty much every single after market plate you see is illegal. I know a traffic cop, they use them as an excuse to pull over vehicles they have suspicions about. More often than not they then find more serious offences to pick them up with.



Which goes to show how thick some folk really are. Back in the 90's a mate got in to some fairly serious villainy to do with hijacked loads of mobile phones, he didn't like wearing seatbelts, thought it was rebellious to not do so. I told him that when he gets pulled for the seatbelt and they find some swag or cash he'll feel a right cunt sat in a cell for 10 years over a sodding seatbelt, and while you're at it  make sure that car is tip-top legit. He took that on board, bought a bland car that was 100% legal. He never got nicked and used the ill-gotten gains to start a legitimate business which flourishes to this day.


----------



## T & P (May 26, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Which goes to show how thick some folk really are. Back in the 90's a mate got in to some fairly serious villainy to do with hijacked loads of mobile phones, he didn't like wearing seatbelts, thought it was rebellious to not do so. I told him that when he gets pulled for the seatbelt and they find some swag or cash he'll feel a right cunt sat in a cell for 10 years over a sodding seatbelt, and while you're at it  make sure that car is tip-top legit. He took that on board, bought a bland car that was 100% legal. He never got nicked and used the ill-gotten gains to start a legitimate business which flourishes to this day.


The flip side of that tale is one told by someone at work, who claimed one of his friends had been a drug dealer for a number of years, and was becoming increasingly successful. And one day he decided to splash out some of his earnings on a Lambo. Whilst still living in his council estate flat. According to my work colleague, it wasn't too long before the Old Bill came knocking, unsurprisingly enough...


----------



## pbsmooth (May 26, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Which goes to show how thick some folk really are. Back in the 90's a mate got in to some fairly serious villainy to do with hijacked loads of mobile phones, he didn't like wearing seatbelts, thought it was rebellious to not do so. I told him that when he gets pulled for the seatbelt and they find some swag or cash he'll feel a right cunt sat in a cell for 10 years over a sodding seatbelt, and while you're at it  make sure that car is tip-top legit. He took that on board, bought a bland car that was 100% legal. He never got nicked and used the ill-gotten gains to start a legitimate business which flourishes to this day.



the man in the story? Bill Gates.


----------



## teuchter (May 26, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Which goes to show how thick some folk really are. Back in the 90's a mate got in to some fairly serious villainy to do with hijacked loads of mobile phones, he didn't like wearing seatbelts, thought it was rebellious to not do so. I told him that when he gets pulled for the seatbelt and they find some swag or cash he'll feel a right cunt sat in a cell for 10 years over a sodding seatbelt, and while you're at it  make sure that car is tip-top legit. He took that on board, bought a bland car that was 100% legal. He never got nicked and used the ill-gotten gains to start a legitimate business which flourishes to this day.


A heartwarming story. If you hadn't assisted him in accruing criminal gains from presumably innocent people, he might never have blossomed into the successful capitalist he is now.


----------



## kebabking (May 26, 2022)

dessiato said:


> I think I’ll buy a RR to go with my Barbour, and red trousers. I’ll need some Hunters of course. Just to irritate some board members. I’ll have to get a fuck off sized tow bar to pull a boat out of the water, and join the Royal Yacht Club.



Hunters?

Fucking hell....


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 26, 2022)

teuchter said:


> A heartwarming story. If you hadn't assisted him in accruing criminal gains from presumably innocent people, he might never have blossomed into the successful capitalist he is now.




Exactly, a modern day hero here.


----------



## hash tag (May 26, 2022)

platinumsage said:


> The worst thing about that car is the bad parking.


The other side of that Lamb was pretty much on the line; I know it was slightly crooked, but it was too wide for the space


----------



## platinumsage (May 26, 2022)

hash tag said:


> The other side of that Lamb was pretty much on the line; I know it was slightly crooked, but it was too wide for the space



Plenty of space to get it between the lines, it only needs shifting a few centimetres but presumably the owner couldn't be arsed.

I do actually like the colour. I think more cars should be painted interesting colours, it would certainly result in fewer accidents as cars would be more visible than the typical black or grey which seem designed to blend in with the road surface.


----------



## dessiato (May 26, 2022)

kebabking said:


> Hunters?
> 
> Fucking hell....


If you're going to piss people off, do it properly.


----------



## dessiato (May 26, 2022)

platinumsage said:


> Plenty of space to get it between the lines, it only needs shifting a few centimetres but presumably the owner couldn't be arsed.
> 
> I do actually like the colour. I think more cars should be painted interesting colours, it would certainly result in fewer accidents as cars would be more visible than the typical black or grey which seem designed to blend in with the road surface.


That's, partly, why I don't like green, and like yellow.


----------



## Spymaster (May 26, 2022)

platinumsage said:


> I do actually like the colour. I think more cars should be painted interesting colours,



That’s not paint. It’s wrapped.


----------



## hash tag (May 26, 2022)

If you are going to have a loud car, you might as well have a loud colour. I have seen worse IE gold wraps on a Ferrari or Bentley.


----------



## kebabking (May 26, 2022)

dessiato said:


> If you're going to piss people off, do it properly.



Hunters don't provoke rage, they provoke pity....


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 26, 2022)

dessiato said:


> If you're going to piss people off, do it properly.




Kate Moss wears Hunters, never had you down as a fan of Croydon fashion...


----------



## kebabking (May 26, 2022)

Hunter wellies = people who think _Towniefile_ is a more accurate representation of rural life than _Clarksons Farm_....


----------



## hash tag (Jun 13, 2022)

A prototype electric roller 🤣


----------



## nogojones (Jun 13, 2022)

Can't wait to see that hitting the speed humps


----------



## T & P (Jun 13, 2022)

If Bruce Wayne had come from Oxfordshire instead of Gotham…


----------



## ska invita (Jun 13, 2022)

i wonder how much it costs to fill up a range rover


----------



## Spymaster (Jun 13, 2022)

ska invita said:


> i wonder how much it costs to fill up a range rover



They have different tank capacities, so between £100 and £200 at current prices.


----------



## pbsmooth (Jun 14, 2022)

how long til you can get petrol on klarna


----------



## kabbes (Jun 14, 2022)

hash tag said:


> A prototype electric roller 🤣
> View attachment 327083


Wot


----------



## Dogsauce (Jun 14, 2022)

hash tag said:


> A prototype electric roller 🤣
> View attachment 327083


TBH I don’t mind when concept cars look a bit wacky, a bit of creativity is welcome given how many modern cars just look the same shape. Although this one does still look a bit shit. It’d be improved if it had wings that would fold out of the side and allow flight for whatever supervillain owned it.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 15, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> TBH I don’t mind when concept cars look a bit wacky, a bit of creativity is welcome given how many modern cars just look the same shape. Although this one does still look a bit shit. It’d be improved if it had wings that would fold out of the side and allow flight for whatever supervillain owned it.


I am sure it was that legendary car designer Giorgetto Giiugiaro who spoke out against the concept of all the retro cars like the 500, the Mustang Etc. saying that 
they were boring, showed a lack of imagination and killed the search for new designs.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 15, 2022)

dessiato My little GTV was by Giugiaro - just saying like 


dessiato said:


> I like Alfa, they're usually so pretty. This one isn't, but it's still a great car. That engine though...who makes prettier engines than the Italian's?"


----------



## dessiato (Jun 15, 2022)

hash tag said:


> A prototype electric roller 🤣
> View attachment 327083


The more I look at this the more features I see that I like. The nose and front wings fail, some minor adjustments on the rear arches, but the rest is nice. There’s potential in the design.


----------



## hash tag (Jun 15, 2022)

dessiato said:


> The more I look at this the more features I see that I like. The nose and front wings fail, some minor adjustments on the rear arches, but the rest is nice. There’s potential in the design.


It looks like something someone with more money than taste would come up with ie Will I Am (?)
eg


----------



## kabbes (Jun 15, 2022)

dessiato said:


> The more I look at this the more features I see that I like. The nose and front wings fail, some minor adjustments on the rear arches, but the rest is nice. There’s potential in the design.


But how does it actually, y’know, _go_?


----------



## dessiato (Jun 15, 2022)

kabbes said:


> But how does it actually, y’know, _go_?


Electrickery I'd guess.


----------



## kabbes (Jun 15, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Electrickery I'd guess.


What, and that makes it levitate?


----------



## hash tag (Jun 15, 2022)

I thought this was the SUV I had been waiting for but it's going to be electric. Probably only around £350,000 as well








						McLaren primes electric super-SUV for launch by 2030 | Autocar
					

Woking to follow rivals in chase for big profits; new high-riders will be electric-only




					www.autocar.co.uk


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jun 15, 2022)

Just needs some googly eyes on the side there and it'd look the dead spit of kermit the fucking frog.



_Hullo hullo, and welcome to the divorced dentist having a midlife crisis show..._


----------



## Pickman's model (Jun 27, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> tbf Orange is the up and coming colour, which is odd as it looks terrible on anything other than a 911.


yeh anyone who's seen diced carrot on the street knows orange is the up and coming colour


----------



## quimcunx (Jun 27, 2022)

I passed a range rover sport (or similar) the other day at this junction. The driver had managed to drive the front wheel over the bell then get stuck.


----------



## nick (Jun 27, 2022)

Dumbarton Road/Brixton Hill?
If so - that is the most famous bollard on U75. Think I have seen it on about 4 different threads, at various times









						Entirely unashamed anti car propaganda, and the more the better.
					

Does that prove further investment in public transport in London is unnecessary or something?  😆👏👏👏👏👏 keep it up!




					www.urban75.net
				












						Brixton Liveable Neighbourhood and LTN schemes - improvements for pedestrians and cyclists
					

You’ve missed the point. Was suggested public transport should be free. £1500 is what it would add to council tax bills each year to cover the cost.   The issue would be tube capacity - free buses would make a lot more sense - simplistically more people on buses means less cars ( In lots of the...




					www.urban75.net


----------



## quimcunx (Jun 27, 2022)

It does seem to be especially designed for that purpose.


----------



## T & P (Jun 27, 2022)

I have to say, the more I see the Lambo Urus about, the more I like it. Not fan of SUVs in general, but if you can afford it and must buy yourself one of those beasts, might as well embrace it and go the full monty...


----------



## DownwardDog (Jun 27, 2022)

T & P said:


> I have to say, the more I see the Lambo Urus about, the more I like it. Not fan of SUVs in general, but if you can afford it and must buy yourself one of those beasts, might as well embrace it and go the full monty...



It is a great looking car and has been a massive commercial success. They've already sold more of them than every V12 Lambo ever.


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 2, 2022)

6x6 LandCruiser 200 camper thing which will be useless off-road.


----------



## rubbershoes (Jul 2, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> 6x6 LandCruiser 200 camper thing which will be useless off-road.



Aimed at the Dubai market?


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 3, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> Aimed at the Dubai market?



Australia. For doing this type of caper. Which is apparently some people's idea of a good time.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 19, 2022)

Family's desperate battle to save Range Rover from rising tide
					

The engine failed as they launched their boat from the slipway in the early hours




					www.cornwalllive.com
				




Beautiful


----------



## hash tag (Jul 19, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Family's desperate battle to save Range Rover from rising tide
> 
> 
> The engine failed as they launched their boat from the slipway in the early hours
> ...


She was left sobbing at the water's edge 😓


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 19, 2022)

The best bit about the story is that in spite of what was first thought, it wasn’t a clueless tourist, the fault lay with that legendary JLR reliability


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 20, 2022)

Pop a bag of rice in the cabin, be good a new by morning.


----------



## mx wcfc (Jul 20, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Pop a bag of rice in the cabin, be good a new by morning.


Cat litter - works far better.


----------



## A380 (Jul 20, 2022)

mx wcfc said:


> Cat litter - works far better.


Put rice in the cat litter?


----------



## hash tag (Jul 20, 2022)

A380 said:


> Put rice in the cat litter?


Yes. Better than wasting it on a range rover that's got a little damp.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 20, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> Family's desperate battle to save Range Rover from rising tide
> 
> 
> The engine failed as they launched their boat from the slipway in the early hours
> ...



Can't help but think of this...


----------



## blairsh (Jul 20, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> Can't help but think of this...



Starter car!!! This is a finisher!


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 23, 2022)

A lot of people not sure about whether or not they need to get an SUV, so I created this handy flowchart:


----------



## T & P (Jul 24, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> A lot of people not sure about whether or not they need to get an SUV, so I created this handy flowchart:
> 
> View attachment 334146


Did you really make that? Pretty neat 

You could have even added that even if one had abnormally large children, they’d ve better served interior space-wise by plenty of of smaller cars anyway. My boss has a BMW X5 and both the passenger room and boot capacity are fucking shit, actually. 

It’s almost like a magic trick. a reverse Tardis if you will. A ludicrously voluminous vehicle on the outside, somehow managing to offer pisspoor legroom and boot space.


----------



## kebabking (Jul 24, 2022)

The best thing about owning an SUV - Nissan Pathfinder: it's _vast_, you should try one - is that it's doing the Lords' work of giving people like Frank aneurysms...


----------



## hash tag (Jul 24, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> A lot of people not sure about whether or not they need to get an SUV, so I created this handy flowchart:
> 
> View attachment 334146


Very nice, but, what about elderly people with mobility issues who have difficulty getting in and out of the average car?


----------



## kebabking (Jul 24, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Very nice, but, what about elderly people with mobility issues who have difficulty getting in and out of the average car?



Frank is a misanthrope. He loves the idea of people suffering discomfort and inconvenience, and he writhes like a slug in salt at the concept of people enjoying themselves.

You're as well having a conversation with an empty yoghurt pot.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 24, 2022)

kebabking said:


> Frank is a misanthrope. He loves the idea of people suffering discomfort and inconvenience, and he writhes like a slug in salt at the concept of people enjoying themselves.



He says after boasting that he likes his car because it upsets people.

Nothing more misanthropic than prioritising your own 'comfort and convenience' over the health and wellbeing of the general public. Although exactly what's convenient about a car with a 50 metre turning circle that doesn't fit in parking spaces I've never been able to discern.


----------



## MickiQ (Jul 24, 2022)

Mrs Q and I are keen to take up a lot more cycling when we retire next year. We've discussed trading in the Audi for an SUV so we can have a vehicle more suitable for transporting bicycles.
Probably won't be a Range Rover though


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 24, 2022)

A roof rack is far more convenient for transporting bikes than the interior of any SUV.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 24, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> A roof rack is far more convenient for transporting bikes than the interior of any SUV.



Best thing for transporting a bike is, well, a bike.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Jul 24, 2022)

A VW Transporter is what you need MickiQ, keeps folk like Frank happy as they emit zero CO2 and children bounce off their spongey surface.


----------



## co-op (Jul 24, 2022)

kebabking said:


> Frank is a misanthrope. He loves the idea of people suffering discomfort and inconvenience, and he writhes like a slug in salt at the concept of people enjoying themselves.
> 
> You're as well having a conversation with an empty yoghurt pot.



No, Frank thinks your choice of car is anti-social and you know why, hence your very defensive reaction.


----------



## MickiQ (Jul 24, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> A roof rack is far more convenient for transporting bikes than the interior of any SUV.


I was thinking of a tail mounted rack rather than the interior


----------



## MickiQ (Jul 24, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> Best thing for transporting a bike is, well, a bike.


Too much traffic on the roads


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 24, 2022)

MickiQ said:


> Too much traffic on the roads



Better buy another car then.


----------



## hash tag (Jul 24, 2022)

MickiQ said:


> Mrs Q and I are keen to take up a lot more cycling when we retire next year. We've discussed trading in the Audi for an SUV so we can have a vehicle more suitable for transporting bicycles.
> Probably won't be a Range Rover though


A nice little pick up is what is needed( from Brooklands earlier)


----------



## DownwardDog (Jul 29, 2022)

The Lamborghini Huracan Sterrato 'off road sports car' has had the green light for production.



Don't lie - you all want one.


----------



## dessiato (Jul 29, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> The Lamborghini Huracan Sterrato 'off road sports car' has had the green light for production.
> 
> View attachment 335026
> 
> Don't lie - you all want one.


I really do! Much more than is sensible to want something.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 29, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> The Lamborghini Huracan Sterrato 'off road sports car' has had the green light for production.
> 
> View attachment 335026
> 
> Don't lie - you all want one.


That has to be one of the most stupid things I’ve ever seen.


Of course I want one


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 29, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> That has to be one of the most stupid things I’ve ever seen.
> 
> 
> Of course I want one



An off road car with 3mm of ground clearance. Brilliant idea.


----------



## Dogsauce (Jul 30, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> A VW Transporter is what you need MickiQ, keeps folk like Frank happy as they emit zero CO2 and children bounce off their spongey surface.


Here in liberal elite land all the posho families have these or similar day vans with a quadruple bike rack on the rear. Much less vulgar looking than a 4x4 and can pretend the emissions are better. If they made an electric version these folk would achieve nirvana or something.


----------



## weltweit (Jul 30, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> The Lamborghini Huracan Sterrato 'off road sports car' has had the green light for production.
> 
> View attachment 335026
> 
> Don't lie - you all want o


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 30, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> Here in liberal elite land all the posho families have these or similar day vans with a quadruple bike rack on the rear. Much less vulgar looking than a 4x4 and can pretend the emissions are better. If they made an electric version these folk would achieve nirvana or something.


I’ve just got back from a week in Cornwall. They are _everywhere_ down there


----------



## SpookyFrank (Jul 30, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> I’ve just got back from a week in Cornwall. They are _everywhere_ down there



Loads of yellow VW vans in particular. A big batch of ex-AA fleet went on the market a decade or so ago and every middle aged surf bore in Cornwall got one.

You'll pay a premium for VW vans these days, whether new or with 200,000 miles on them, because they're a status symbol for look-how-outdoorsy-I-am types. You can now get a superior Mercedes van for cheaper than a transporter IIRC.


----------



## platinumsage (Jul 30, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> I’ve just got back from a week in Cornwall. They are _everywhere_ down there



And what were you driving?


----------



## ice-is-forming (Jul 30, 2022)

my grandson (18months) getting his 4x4 on, in one of the biggest remote control cars I've ever seen.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jul 30, 2022)

platinumsage said:


> And what were you driving?


A 999cc Seat Mii  

Literally the smallest and most basic* car on the road down there by a considerable degree 


*doesn’t even have electric windows or central locking


----------



## hash tag (Aug 6, 2022)

An early 4x4 but not a commercial success 








						Rare Roadless Land Rover Sells for £110,000 | Tennants Auctioneers
					






					www.tennants.co.uk


----------



## nick (Aug 13, 2022)

Range Rover feeling a little cramped?
I give you the Ford Super Duty - as seen dwarfing both a RR and one of those new Defenders, in Blue Ridge, Georgia.  
Although, to be fair, there is a little more countryside in that part of the world than in Chelsea


----------



## hash tag (Aug 17, 2022)

I have just fallen down an internet black hole and found this; filmed in Bahnhof Strasse back yard, this shows why you need a vehicle like this


----------



## A380 (Aug 17, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I have just fallen down an internet black hole and found this; filmed in Bahnhof Strasse back yard, this shows why you need a vehicle like this



Not a patch on:


----------



## ska invita (Aug 17, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I have just fallen down an internet black hole and found this; filmed in Bahnhof Strasse back yard, this shows why you need a vehicle like this



Saw one the other day and was wondering who dinosaur claw scratch stickers are meant to appeal to... Guess they've done their market research


----------



## hash tag (Aug 17, 2022)

A380 said:


> Not a patch on:



Bastard. A widebody hellcat is probably my dream car. I have just a few minutes ago looked at taking a driving experience in one ( where the ranger clip was filmed).
Not a 4x4 though and not the most impressive advert.


----------



## A380 (Aug 17, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Bastard. A widebody hellcat is probably my dream car. I have just a few minutes ago looked at taking a driving experience in one ( where the ranger clip was filmed).
> Not a 4x4 though and not the most impressive advert.


America! Fuck Yeah!


----------



## Chz (Aug 17, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Bastard. A widebody hellcat is probably my dream car.


Definitely.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 17, 2022)

A380 said:


> America! Fuck Yeah!


Is there anything that will get the juices flowing more than a big, powerful V8.


----------



## A380 (Aug 17, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Is there anything that will get the juices flowing more than a big, powerful V8.





Merlin…


----------



## hash tag (Aug 18, 2022)

Bit OTT for me, but who can forget the beast? John Dodd and the Merlin-engined monstrosity that infuriated Rolls-Royce


----------



## DownwardDog (Aug 19, 2022)

It had a Meteor engine not a Merlin. #funpolice


----------



## hash tag (Aug 21, 2022)

Seen this morning on a Chelsea tractor


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Aug 21, 2022)

Presumably with a black screw to form the U, making it both stupid _and_ illegal?


----------



## nogojones (Aug 21, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Is there anything that will get the juices flowing more than a big, powerful V8.


A big powerful V8 with a potato rammed up its exhaust?


----------



## hash tag (Aug 28, 2022)

I have never seen one of these before and might be going to see my bank manager tomorrow about acquiring it. It comes with luxuries like power steering, air con and even a radio. BcSale| Used cars for sale:::


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 28, 2022)

hash tag said:


> I have never seen one of these before and might be going to see my bank manager tomorrow about acquiring it. It comes with luxuries like power steering, air con and even a radio. BcSale| Used cars for sale:::View attachment 340073



You're lucky to find one of them on sale. Dealers can't import them any more, for some reason.

I'd love one but apparently the steering wheel is slightly off-centre relative to the driver and that's the sort of thing which would drive me mad.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 28, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> You're lucky to find one of them on sale. Dealers can't import them any more, for some reason.
> 
> I'd love one but apparently the steering wheel is slightly off-centre relative to the driver and that's the sort of thing which would drive me mad.


Funnily enough, there was a car on the forecourt with a Russian flag on its rear number plate.


----------



## hash tag (Aug 28, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> You're lucky to find one of them on sale. Dealers can't import them any more, for some reason.
> 
> I'd love one but apparently the steering wheel is slightly off-centre relative to the driver and that's the sort of thing which would drive me mad.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Aug 28, 2022)

Note two gearsticks. One is for the locking differential. I think it also switches between hi and low gear ratios.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Aug 28, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> the steering wheel is slightly off-centre relative to the driver



weird



SpookyFrank said:


> Note two gearsticks. One is for the locking differential. I think it also switches between hi and low gear ratios.



dunno - think i've seen a second lever in older land rovers, never really given much thought to what it's there for

some coaches used to have a two speed rear axle, with a switch on or next to the gear lever.  i've never had to drive one, so not quite sure how it works


----------



## DownwardDog (Aug 29, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> Note two gearsticks. One is for the locking differential. I think it also switches between hi and low gear ratios.



Niva has no centre diff so it's always 'locked'. The second lever is for normal and low range.

They are complete fucking garbage and get zero out of four stars in the RUSSIAN safety rating system. They are particularly prone to killing passengers with head trauma in relatively low speed accidents.

There's a guy in my suburb who is obsessed with them and restores them. I've done some welding and fabrication for him so I'm pretty familiar with them. Just, no.


----------



## A380 (Aug 29, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Niva has no centre diff so it's always 'locked'. The second lever is for normal and low range.
> 
> They are complete fucking garbage and get zero out of four stars in the RUSSIAN safety rating system. They are particularly prone to killing passengers with head trauma in relatively low speed accidents.
> 
> There's a guy in my suburb who is obsessed with them and restores them. I've done some welding and fabrication for him so I'm pretty familiar with them. Just, no.



About 25 years ago my dad had a press car Niva convertible for a week. It was the shitest new cat I have ever driven. To make it a soft top  they had just taken the roof off with an  angle grinder. The hood was held on with press studs, the best bit was the boot was intact but they had just cut off the rear door leaving a nine inch high door so you couldn’t put anything wider than nine inches in the boot. It also had that great Lada understeer.


----------



## Chz (Aug 29, 2022)

Ex-mil friend of mine owned one. He took me on an off-road session to show it off, and I did have to admit that it was pretty damned capable at handing a muddy field full of ruts and furrows. I think on a basic mechanical level, they're sound. Most Russian stuff is, or st least easily serviced by the illiterate. It's when I wanted to turn something on (I forget what) that the assembly quality came into play. Instead of the button depressing, it just popped in and completely vanished inside the dashboard. Took 20 minutes to find it.


----------



## DownwardDog (Sep 14, 2022)

Ferrari Purosange is here.



NA 6.5L V12 is a bold choice that sets it apart, and possibly above, the Urus. I'd get an RR Cullinan if it were my money but this thing is going to be a money making machine for Ferrari.


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Sep 14, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Ferrari Purosange is here.
> 
> View attachment 342669
> 
> NA 6.5L V12 is a bold choice that sets it apart, and possibly above, the Urus. I'd get an RR Cullinan if it were my money but this thing is going to be a money making machine for Ferrari.


I should hate that. Have to say though, it looks rather lovely. They’ve basically made a large and comfy GT, not an SUV.


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## DownwardDog (Sep 14, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> I should hate that. Have to say though, it looks rather lovely. They’ve basically made a large and comfy GT, not an SUV.



It still has the dreaded PTU from the FF/GTC Lusso. This is a seperate 2 speed transmisson for the front wheels that goes very expensively wrong... a lot...


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## beesonthewhatnow (Sep 14, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> It still has the dreaded PTU from the FF/GTC Lusso. This is a seperate 2 speed transmisson for the front wheels that goes very expensively wrong... a lot...


Oh I imagine it will be as reliable as a chocolate kettle. It’s still quite a beautiful object though, the rear 3/4 view in particular is fabulous.


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 15, 2022)

If was in the market for such a thing would still go Urus, a Lambo you can live with. The Ferrari looks too small, just a jacked up version of their regular cars, not a daily driver and not enough 'fuck you peasant' to be a full on SUV.


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## beesonthewhatnow (Sep 15, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> If was in the market for such a thing would still go Urus, a Lambo you can live with. The Ferrari looks too small, just a jacked up version of their regular cars, not a daily driver and not enough 'fuck you peasant' to be a full on SUV.


The Lambo Anus looks like it was styled by an 8 year old child.  That Ferrari works precisely because they haven’t gone down the dreadful SUV styling route.


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 15, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> The Lambo Anus looks like it was styled by an 8 year old child.



Yes, which I why I love it


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 15, 2022)

Oooh, seeing it here, nice...


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## hash tag (Sep 26, 2022)

Getting back to basics, I see Car SOS on more4 tonight is restoring an early RR.


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## Leafster (Sep 26, 2022)

hash tag said:


> Getting back to basics, I see Car SOS on more4 tonight is restoring an early RR.


I still think Rolls Royce when I see RR written down rather than Range Rover.


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## T & P (Sep 28, 2022)

Just when you thought they couldn’t make the Ranger Rover any uglier, the 2022 model arrives…








Not only hideous, but something about the rear lights makes it look like a Ford! Ugly, and cheap-looking to boot


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## Chz (Sep 29, 2022)

It looks bland. Same as it ever did. You can only dress up a giant box so much.


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## Spymaster (Sep 29, 2022)

T & P said:


> Just when you thought they couldn’t make the Ranger Rover any uglier, the 2022 model arrives…
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I think it looks better than previous RRs, but that's not a high bar.


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## DownwardDog (Sep 29, 2022)

It looks good but will be disasterously unreliable. The real significance is that it has a BMW engine and JLR (like Aston Martin)  have basically given up in the powertrain business.


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## hash tag (Sep 30, 2022)

A nice little Merc in the West End


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## beesonthewhatnow (Sep 30, 2022)

hash tag said:


> A nice little Merc in the West End
> View attachment 345176


You have to be a massive twat to even drive one of those through the desert in Dubai, to take one into central London is a whole new level of cunt


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## nick (Oct 2, 2022)

Don't forget you will normally have a white rolls Royce fun of security / homeys following you round.

I really hate Park Lane / Piccadilly in the summer


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## UnderAnOpenSky (Oct 3, 2022)




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## DownwardDog (Oct 3, 2022)

77 plate = Moscow. Enough said...


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## hash tag (Oct 3, 2022)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 345617


Did someone really do that by design or more likely, someone was offended by the wheels and threw paint at it.


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## Spymaster (Oct 3, 2022)

Looks like a weird paint job to me. It’s not on the grille, the lights, the windows, mirrors or wheels.


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## Leafster (Oct 3, 2022)

Spymaster said:


> Looks like a weird paint job to me. It’s not on the grille, the lights, the windows, mirrors or wheels.


Yeah, I think it's an odd paid job. The letters for 'Range Rover' have been moved so it says 'Ran Over' which would be consistent with the paint theme.


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## Spymaster (Oct 3, 2022)

Leafster said:


> The letters for 'Range Rover' have been moved so it says 'Ran Over' which would be consistent with the paint theme.



I missed that


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## Sweet FA (Oct 3, 2022)

You'll be unsurprised to know it's a thing.


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## Spymaster (Oct 3, 2022)

Tasteful


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## beesonthewhatnow (Oct 3, 2022)

For when you absolutely have to be 100% sure that everyone knows you’re a cunt.


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## ska invita (Oct 3, 2022)

Free Candy is parked in a disabled bay natch


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## ska invita (Oct 8, 2022)

last night





knowing that junction i cant imagine how they ended up there on the wrong side of the road tbh - something very special was going on in that car


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## A380 (Oct 8, 2022)

Sweet FA said:


> You'll be unsurprised to know it's a thing.
> 
> View attachment 345652View attachment 345653View attachment 345654
> 
> ...



These, and the original Moscow one, mostly look like vinyl wraps rather than paint jobs though. Done with software that works out the design pre and post shrinkage and then printed and applied.

Not as much as a re spray and can be peeled off later. Like police cars and ambulances…


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## Sweet FA (Oct 8, 2022)

Pretty much all the non-standard 'paint' jobs are wraps now.


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## SpookyFrank (Oct 16, 2022)

Just clocked this latest lexus tractor. Looks like they've fitted an actual cow catcher on the front. Only you know, for small children instead of cows.


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## kebabking (Oct 16, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> View attachment 347373
> 
> Just clocked this latest lexus tractor. Looks like they've fitted an actual cow catcher on the front. Only you know, for small children instead of cows.



That's a fabulously expensive way of telling people that your wife is being roared up by _Raoul_, the Pilates instructor, and that you're compensating...


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## Spymaster (Oct 16, 2022)

kebabking said:


> That's a fabulously expensive way of telling people that your wife is being roared up by _Raoul_, the Pilates instructor, and that you're compensating...


I’d put bull-bars on the front then


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## ska invita (Oct 16, 2022)

Found this last night ... 




Can we lock the thread please mods?


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## beesonthewhatnow (Oct 16, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> View attachment 347373
> 
> Just clocked this latest lexus tractor. Looks like they've fitted an actual cow catcher on the front. Only you know, for small children instead of cows.


What the actual fuck


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## ska invita (Oct 21, 2022)




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## mx wcfc (Oct 22, 2022)

Oh dear. I saw this break down about an hour before this photo. The driver was asking people to help, but wanker car, so pfft. 

The traffic was ok for a while till the lorry couldn’t get past. 

Whole of town now gridlocked.


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## UnderAnOpenSky (Oct 24, 2022)




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## kabbes (Oct 24, 2022)

Why has he taken the integral of it from zero to 1?


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## hash tag (Oct 31, 2022)

This has certainly been hit with the ugly stick


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## kebabking (Oct 31, 2022)

Anyone know is there's any publicly available work on the comparable drag figures for crossovers (Honda HRV, ASX, Kuga etc..) versus the more traditional stuff like Focus, Astra etc...?

I'd be particularly interested in comparing two similar sized vehicles from the same manufacturer - one trad, one crossover - so a Skoda Octavia with 4x4, and a Skoda Kodiaq with 4x4 for example...


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Nov 3, 2022)

Hendon Way last night…


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## T & P (Nov 3, 2022)

1. Buy ultra expensive car of a type meant to be for off road and tough conditions usage
2. Use it exclusively on urban environments usually as challenging as driving through a shopping mall car park
3. Get stuck through ineptitude the only one time you encounter challenging driving conditions, which you could and should have avoided since you’re in a first world city not deep in the Amazon with no alternative routes.
4. Likely cause thousands of quid worth of damage to the car, and be photographed escaping through the window for added public ridicule

Sterling work


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## platinumsage (Nov 3, 2022)

It’s a Vito, probably an Addison Lee private hire taxi.


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## DownwardDog (Nov 3, 2022)

T & P said:


> 1. Buy ultra expensive car of a type meant to be for off road and tough conditions usage
> 2. Use it exclusively on urban environments usually as challenging as driving through a shopping mall car park
> 3. Get stuck through ineptitude the only one time you encounter challenging driving conditions, which you could and should have avoided since you’re in a first world city not deep in the Amazon with no alternative routes.
> 4. Likely cause thousands of quid worth of damage to the car, and be photographed escaping through the window for added public ridicule
> ...



Ultra expensive? It's a five year old first gen. GLC! Not exactly intended for off road or tough conditions either.

Scratch that, platinumsage has it right. It's a Vito.


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## beesonthewhatnow (Nov 3, 2022)

Either way, it’s fucking funny.


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## T & P (Nov 3, 2022)

Oh. On my small phone screen it looked like whatever the boxy Mercedes model 4x4 model is called. 

Which makes it funny for different reasons, though it feels mean to laugh at what now looks likely to be a blameless taxi customer, late for something important, having to bail and wade through three feet of water do to the incompetence of the driver.


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## hash tag (Nov 5, 2022)

I guess some Porsche fans will like this 








						Behold the 'experimental' off-road 911 Carrera
					

What car to take to the highest volcano in the world? If you're Porsche, a 911 Carrera 4S, obviously...




					www.pistonheads.com


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## Dogsauce (Nov 8, 2022)

See, I quite like that because it’s been designed for a purpose and looks fun. Better than having a massive truck for the school run.


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## kebabking (Nov 8, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> See, I quite like that because it’s been designed for a purpose and looks fun. Better than having a massive truck for the school run.



See, for driving across Iceland, or across Central Asia, it would be huge fun. Taking 3 kids and a dog camping for a week - probably _less optimal_.


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## Dogsauce (Nov 8, 2022)

kebabking said:


> See, for driving across Iceland, or across Central Asia, it would be huge fun. Taking 3 kids and a dog camping for a week - probably _less optimal_.


Is it legal for passengers to travel in a caravan in those regions? Asking for a friend.


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## AverageJoe (Nov 9, 2022)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Hendon Way last night…
> 
> View attachment 350115


"just drop me off anywhere round here mate. This'll do".


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## hash tag (Dec 3, 2022)

This hotel in Knightsbridge had Ferraris, lambos, McLaren's outside.    And


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## Dogsauce (Dec 3, 2022)

Christ, their cock must be inverted.


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## T & P (Dec 3, 2022)

hash tag said:


> This hotel in Knightsbridge had Ferraris, lambos, McLaren's outside.    And
> View attachment 354100


Annual Millionaire Wanker Convention, no doubt.


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## hash tag (Dec 6, 2022)

It's not pretty, but it is an ev from Scotland 

www.pistonheads.com/news/electric-vehicles/all-new-munro-mk1-set-to-


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## T & P (Dec 6, 2022)

Did they use Lego briks to build it?


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## ska invita (Dec 6, 2022)

hash tag said:


> It's not pretty, but it is an ev from Scotland
> View attachment 354511
> www.pistonheads.com/news/electric-vehicles/all-new-munro-mk1-set-to-


link was borked








						All-new Munro Mk_1 set to electrify off-roading
					

Scotland's first volume produced car in 40 years promises unmatched 4x4 ability - without an engine




					www.pistonheads.com
				



if it werent for the military connotations with that look i wouldnt mind it that much
not flash enough for the chelsea and kensington set either
50k + VAT
hard to begrudge an electric non-corporate vehicle like this
just wish it didnt look quite so army


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## nick (Dec 6, 2022)

Dunno if they built it out of lego - Burt certainly the draughtsperson was in love with their set-square

Find it hard to believe that front is pedestrian friendly : never mind harmlessly throwing them over the bonnet, it would just turn the average child into jam


ETA - wrote the above before reading the link from Ska Invita. I am not related to "rumble of Thunder" on piston heads, who also went with the jam analogy


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## A380 (Dec 7, 2022)

hash tag said:


> It's not pretty, but it is an ev from Scotland
> View attachment 354511
> www.pistonheads.com/news/electric-vehicles/all-new-munro-mk1-set-to-



Unlike most of the stuff on here I quite like that as an EV.


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## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 7, 2022)

A380 said:


> Unlike most of the stuff on here I quite like that as an EV.


It’s fucking horrific and should be illegal to drive on a public road.


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## kabbes (Dec 7, 2022)

Gotta say, I don’t understand how it can meet safety standards


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## platinumsage (Dec 7, 2022)

Probably aren’t many child pedestrians jumping in front of 4x4s on grouse moors. In fact I expect the off-road child death rate to be far lower per vehicle kilometre than that of quad bikes or various other bits of farm machinery.

Obviously if people buys these to speed around the street of Edinburgh or whatever that might be a different matter.


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## Spymaster (Dec 7, 2022)

kabbes said:


> Gotta say, I don’t understand how it can meet safety standards


Which ones?


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## kabbes (Dec 7, 2022)

Spymaster said:


> Which ones?


Well, the ones I assumed existed in my head. I just assumed that there were rules these days that you aren’t allowed to build cars that batter pedestrians’ brains at the slightest contact?


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## DownwardDog (Dec 7, 2022)

kabbes said:


> Well, the ones I assumed existed in my head. I just assumed that there were rules these days that you aren’t allowed to build cars that batter pedestrians’ brains at the slightest contact?



Low volume manufacturers, which the creators of this Minecraft Monstrosity will almost certainly be, are exempted from some regulations.


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## nogojones (Dec 7, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Low volume manufacturers, which the creators of this Minecraft Monstrosity will almost certainly be, are exempted from some regulations.


Cool. They should weld some sharp spikes on the front as well then


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 7, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> Low volume manufacturers, which the creators of this Minecraft Monstrosity will almost certainly be, are exempted from some regulations.




Including this thing:




Which at least has a nod to safety with a springy bumper-effort thing.


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## hash tag (Dec 7, 2022)

nogojones said:


> Cool. They should weld some sharp spikes on the front as well then


Don't forget chariot type spikes as fitted to the wheels of some low riders


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## hash tag (Dec 27, 2022)

For all round ugliness, this takes some beating


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## kabbes (Dec 27, 2022)

I am genuinely mystified why people want to buy that.  For a LOT of money.


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## dessiato (Dec 27, 2022)

kabbes said:


> I am genuinely mystified why people want to buy that.  For a LOT of money.


They’re very good for off-road, and very comfortable. But hugely expensive as you say.


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## kabbes (Dec 27, 2022)

dessiato said:


> They’re very good for off-road, and very comfortable. But hugely expensive as you say.


Yeah, that’s some seriously challenging terrain in that photo all right. 

I bet they go straight from there to Everest base camp.


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## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 27, 2022)

dessiato said:


> They’re very good for off-road


No, look at it. It would be utterly terrible off road and is never going anywhere near mud in its entire life.


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## Spymaster (Dec 27, 2022)

Everyone needs a twin turbo V8 for off-roading


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## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 27, 2022)

I do have a soft spot for the G Wagon, especially the supped up Brabus ones, in an urban setting they look proper 28 Days Later. 

Though if I was in the market for a six figure SUV an RSQ8 or Urus would be gracing my driveway.


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## hash tag (Dec 27, 2022)

It does look better in the photo than in the flesh. It has 4 exhausts, 2 each side.....the colour in the flesh is very very dull


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## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 27, 2022)

Spymaster said:


> Everyone needs a twin turbo V8 for off-roading


Also need low profile road tyres and side exit exhausts reducing the ground clearance.


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## A380 (Dec 27, 2022)

Spotted on my afternoon stroll.


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## T & P (Dec 27, 2022)

hash tag said:


> For all round ugliness, this takes some beating
> View attachment 357412


And in Brexit Grey, to add insult to injury…


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## DownwardDog (Dec 28, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> No, look at it. It would be utterly terrible off road and is never going anywhere near mud in its entire life.



The G-Wagen is amazing off road though that one needs different tyres.



The V8s are discontinued in 2023.


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## 8ball (Dec 28, 2022)

hash tag said:


> It's not pretty, but it is an ev from Scotland
> View attachment 354511
> www.pistonheads.com/news/electric-vehicles/all-new-munro-mk1-set-to-



I would def pootle around in something like that after an apocalypse.


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## SpookyFrank (Dec 28, 2022)

beesonthewhatnow said:


> No, look at it. It would be utterly terrible off road and is never going anywhere near mud in its entire life.



This whole idea of a 'luxury' off roader that weighs 3 tons is a fundamentally shit one. Nothing that heavy will get up a muddy or icy incline beyond a certain angle with only four tyres for traction; no matter how many computers it has to make sure the idiot at the wheel doesn't have to decide what gear to use or how much power or whatever.


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## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 28, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> The G-Wagen is amazing off road though that one needs different tyres.
> 
> 
> 
> The V8s are discontinued in 2023.



Oh they can be, sure.

_That_ one isn’t though.


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## DownwardDog (Dec 28, 2022)

SpookyFrank said:


> This whole idea of a 'luxury' off roader that weighs 3 tons is a fundamentally shit one. Nothing that heavy will get up a muddy or icy incline beyond a certain angle with only four tyres for traction; no matter how many computers it has to make sure the idiot at the wheel doesn't have to decide what gear to use or how much power or whatever.



A G will climb (and descend) a 45 deg slope. What other off-roader will do better than that?


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## beesonthewhatnow (Dec 28, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> A G will climb (and descend) a 45 deg slope. What other off-roader will do better than that?


Which I guess was useful for the original military customers, but probably has slightly less day to day relevance for the dickheads that now buy them.


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## SpookyFrank (Dec 28, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> A G will climb (and descend) a 45 deg slope. What other off-roader will do better than that?



A muddy slope? No it won't. In any case it's irrelevant because these machines are not built to go off road. Out here in the countryside you generally see them being driven down the middle of the road because their precious paintwork can't be allowed to come into contact with leaves or, god forbid, a puddle.


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## DownwardDog (Dec 29, 2022)

There are plenty of reasons not to buy a G, the price for a start, but slagging them off for insufficient off-road ability is just ignorant.


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## SpookyFrank (Dec 29, 2022)

DownwardDog said:


> There are plenty of reasons not to buy a G, the price for a start, but slagging them off for insufficient off-road ability is just ignorant.



Do mercedes' marketing department have one of your kids hostage or something? Shit.


----------

