# Wakie alarm clock app: get woken up by strangers calling you up



## editor (Dec 10, 2014)

I think this is dead clever. If I had to get up at some shitty hour I'd probably give it a go. 









> Wakie is a fun, friendly community of people who wake each other up in the morning. It’s a brand new way to wake up, made especially for those of us who hate the jarring noise of an alarm clock. When you use Wakie, you get to start your day with a smile instead of a frown!
> 
> Please note: Wakie is fully available in US, UK, Ireland, Canada, Singapore and Hong Kong. In all other countries users can wake someone up, but can't set alarms for a while. Thank you for your patience!
> 
> ...








Review here: http://techcrunch.com/2014/12/10/wakie/


> The first person I connected with through the app was an American female who, unsurprisingly but slightly disconcertingly, sounded as though she’d only just woken up. Then it dawned on me: that’s because she _had_, and I was the person responsible. Despite having trouble understanding her — she was half asleep after all — we persevered for the remaining 45 seconds or so until the app abruptly cut us off.
> 
> Not deterred by the awkwardness of my first attempt at being a ‘Wakie’, I rolled the dice again. This time I was connected to an American male who was chirpy to say the least. “I’m here to wake you up,” I said, a lot more confidently. “Thanks man!” he replied, as if perhaps he’d been awake for hours. Either way, I was definitely getting the hang of this.


It's been on Android /WM for ages and is now on iPhone.


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## DotCommunist (Dec 10, 2014)

be ace to call someone a cunt as they wake up


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## tommers (Dec 10, 2014)

Jesus fucking christ.


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## Crispy (Dec 10, 2014)

Stuff like this can only exist when it's under the radar and word of mouth. Now it's being publicised, 4chan etc. will get their teeth into it and you can bet that all your wakeup calls will be "I'M GONNA RAPE YOUR MOTHER YOU FAGGOT JEW NIGGER WHORE"


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## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 10, 2014)

Who wakes the wakers up?


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## fucthest8 (Dec 10, 2014)

Modern toss


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## StoneRoad (Dec 10, 2014)

Think  I'll give this app a miss - with a very good clock radio at home and travel clock for, well, travelling - I don't need it.


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## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 10, 2014)

fucthest8 said:


> Modern toss



Yeah...
Bring back this...


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## fucthest8 (Dec 10, 2014)

bubblesmcgrath said:


> Yeah...
> Bring back this...



Not really, my point is that an app which gets a stranger to wake you up, when you have an alarm already on your phone, is just pointless fucking wankery for the sake of it. i.e. toss.

I don't ever want to be woken by a cockerel either.


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## bubblesmcgrath (Dec 10, 2014)

fucthest8 said:


> Not really, my point is that an app which gets a stranger to wake you up, when you have an alarm already on your phone, is just pointless fucking wankery for the sake of it. i.e. toss.
> 
> I don't ever want to be woken by a cockerel either.



Twas in jest


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## High Voltage (Dec 10, 2014)

Crispy said:


> Stuff like this can only exist when it's under the radar and word of mouth. Now it's being publicised, 4chan etc. will get their teeth into it and you can bet that all your wakeup calls will be "I'M GONNA RAPE YOUR MOTHER YOU FAGGOT JEW NIGGER WHORE"



In fairness Crispy you'd be awake after that mind - probably not in the best of moods, but you'd not be very likely to go back to sleep either


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## editor (Dec 10, 2014)

Could always go back to this:












> A knocker-up (sometimes known as a knocker-upper) was a profession[1] in Britain and Ireland that started during and lasted well into the Industrial Revolution and at least as late as the 1920s, before alarm clocks were affordable or reliable. A knocker-up's job was to rouse sleeping people so they could get to work on time.
> 
> The knocker-up used a truncheon or short, heavy stick to knock on the clients' doors or a long and light stick, often made of bamboo, to reach windows on higher floors. At least one of them used a pea-shooter. In return, the knocker-up would be paid a few pence a week. The knocker-up would not leave a client's window until they were sure that the client had been awoken.
> 
> ...


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## StoneRoad (Dec 10, 2014)

Knocker-up used to be quite common for people on very early turns at the engine sheds - or on call-out - back in the days of steam engines.

You could always try maroons or the pagers like those used by lifeboat crews !


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## el-ahrairah (Dec 10, 2014)

Crispy said:


> Stuff like this can only exist when it's under the radar and word of mouth. Now it's being publicised, 4chan etc. will get their teeth into it and you can bet that all your wakeup calls will be "I'M GONNA RAPE YOUR MOTHER YOU FAGGOT JEW NIGGER WHORE"



tbf, that would wake me up quite well.  i'm well able to hold a conversation for a minute without actually surrendering unconsciousness, so some serious invective would do the job.


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## farmerbarleymow (Dec 10, 2014)

If anyone wants waking at 4am give me your number and I'll give you a ring, as I'm normally up by then.


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## Epico (Dec 10, 2014)

"This is your reminder to turn off your alarm and go back to sleep"


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## sim667 (Dec 11, 2014)

I love the idea of it, but I've got a habit of just being horrendously pissed off in the mornings and not being afraid to tell everyone who dares get in my way.

And then I drink coffee and all becomes right in the world.


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## Nancy_Winks (Dec 11, 2014)

The idea of immediately speaking to some stranger before I'd even opened my eyes is so horrendous I couldn't even contemplate it. Plus I bet theres no shortage of men wanting to talk to women in bed first thing in the morning. Fuck that they can pay for that


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## Epico (Dec 11, 2014)

Nancy_Winks said:


> Plus I bet theres no shortage of men wanting to talk to women in bed first thing in the morning. Fuck that they can pay for that



Get writing that business plan. You'll be set for life by the time the clocks change.


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## Yossarian (Dec 11, 2014)

Nancy_Winks said:


> Plus I bet theres no shortage of men wanting to talk to women in bed first thing in the morning. Fuck that they can pay for that



From the TechCrunch review:

_A paid-for ‘Premium’ version of Wakie is in the works that will extend the talk time for each wake up call to 5 minutes, and allow you to specify the gender of the person you are connected to and see their profile after the call, depending on their individual privacy settings._

Because who doesn't like to get chatted up by a stranger off the Internet the second they wake up?


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## maomao (Dec 11, 2014)

What sanction other than just cutting me off would they have against me if I joined and woke people up by being extremely abusive? I get up at 4.45 most days, am invariably in a fucking foul mood for the first half hour or so and feel like taking it out on someone.


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## farmerbarleymow (Dec 11, 2014)

maomao said:


> What sanction other than just cutting me off would they have against me if I joined and woke people up by being extremely abusive? I get up at 4.45 most days, am invariably in a fucking foul mood for the first half hour or so and feel like taking it out on someone.


I need to ring you at that time every day, just so that I can try and piss you off even more. I'm usually insufferably happy first thing.


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## Yossarian (Dec 11, 2014)

maomao said:


> What sanction other than just cutting me off would they have against me if I joined and woke people up by being extremely abusive?



They have your phone number and their business is waking people up - I'm not sure these are people you want to fuck with, they might send other rogue "wakies" your way and you'd be getting farts, heavy breathing, or Bible verses at 3am every morning.


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## maomao (Dec 11, 2014)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I need to ring you at that time every day, just so that I can try and piss you off even more. I'm usually insufferably happy first thing.



That's not going to happen.


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## maomao (Dec 11, 2014)

Yossarian said:


> They have your phone number and their business is waking people up - I'm not sure these are people you want to fuck with, they might send other rogue "wakies" your way and you'd be getting farts, heavy breathing, or Bible verses at 3am every morning.


Phone's on silent, fart away. I have no intention of using it as a wake up service.


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## moochedit (Dec 11, 2014)

so who wakes the other person up?


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## farmerbarleymow (Dec 11, 2014)

maomao said:


> That's not going to happen.



Miserable sod!


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## farmerbarleymow (Dec 11, 2014)

moochedit said:


> so who wakes the other person up?



Heard of time zones?


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## moochedit (Dec 11, 2014)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Heard of time zones?



yeah but what if the other persons a student?


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## farmerbarleymow (Dec 11, 2014)

moochedit said:


> yeah but what if the other persons a student?



Students aren't all lazy good for nothings who sleep 'till noon, you know.


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## Mation (Dec 11, 2014)

bubblesmcgrath said:


> Who wakes the wakers up?


Turtles


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## tommers (Dec 11, 2014)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Students aren't all lazy good for nothings who sleep 'till noon, you know.


Yeah they are.  Don't be ridiculous.


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## moomoo (Dec 11, 2014)

Ugh. I couldn't think of anything worse than having to actually speak to someone before I've had two cups of coffee. That's the reason why I get up an hour earlier than the kids!


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## Nancy_Winks (Dec 11, 2014)

moomoo said:


> Ugh. I couldn't think of anything worse than having to actually speak to someone before I've had two cups of coffee. That's the reason why I get up an hour earlier than the kids!


moomoo  imagine the horror! You've bearly regained consciousness, you fucking hate the world cos it's dark and UTTERLY unreasonable that you (or anyone) should have to get up while it's still dark, then you get some chipper fuck on the phone and your forced to be polite and civil and actually THANK them 

And that's a *good* experience. The bad will be some guy heavy breathing a wanking like mad. Like audio chatroulette. Before coffee.

Fucking sick.


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## tufty79 (Dec 11, 2014)

If i could guarantee that whoever rang just shouted 'get up and make coffee' until i confirm i'm in the kitchen i'd sign up


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## tufty79 (Dec 11, 2014)

Nancy_Winks said:


> moomoo  imagine the horror! You've bearly regained consciousness, you fucking hate the world cos it's dark and UTTERLY unreasonable that you (or anyone) should have to get up while it's still dark, then you get some chipper fuck on the phone and your forced to be polite and civil and actually THANK them
> 
> And that's a *good* experience. The bad will be some guy heavy breathing a wanking like mad. Like audio chatroulette. Before coffee.
> 
> Fucking sick.


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## Buddy Bradley (Dec 11, 2014)

bubblesmcgrath said:


> Yeah...
> Bring back this...


To be fair, the app does provide you with a brand new way to be woken up by a cock.


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## BigTom (Dec 12, 2014)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Students aren't all lazy good for nothings who sleep 'till noon, you know.


Exactly. Some students stay up all night getting wasted and only go to bed at noon.


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## Citizen66 (Dec 17, 2014)

Yossarian said:


> From the TechCrunch review:
> 
> _A paid-for ‘Premium’ version of Wakie is in the works that will extend the talk time for each wake up call to 5 minutes, and allow you to specify the gender of the person you are connected to and see their profile after the call, depending on their individual privacy settings._
> 
> Because who doesn't like to get chatted up by a stranger off the Internet the second they wake up?


Good fapping material.


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## Citizen66 (Dec 17, 2014)

If people use this as they don't like alarm clocks, phone them and have one blare down the receiver.


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