# Parents of toddlers - confess your tots TV crushes...



## Buddy Bradley (Nov 26, 2005)

For some reason Mrs BB claims she has a thing for big cook Ben off of 'Big Cook, Little Cook'. 







Can't see it myself, although I definitely think Balamory's Miss Hoolie is a reet dutty minx away from the nursery... 






Any other parents of toddlers started fetishising their childrens' TV characters, or are we just weird..?


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## kakuma (Nov 26, 2005)

shes pretty stinkin


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## i_hate_beckham (Nov 26, 2005)

Why do i have to have a toddler to fancy young kiddies TV presenters?


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## Maggot (Nov 26, 2005)

Tinky Winky has got it going on (whatever that means).


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## Buddy Bradley (Nov 26, 2005)

i_hate_beckham said:
			
		

> Why do i have to have a toddler to fancy young kiddies TV presenters?


Well I suppose you don't, but otherwise you really should be asking yourself why you're watching them...


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## i_hate_beckham (Nov 26, 2005)

From Tikkabilla.


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## stavros (Nov 26, 2005)

I'm not a parent but Ellie from Newsround and Angelica from CBBC are good when you're waiting for Neighbours to come on;


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## Bajie (Nov 26, 2005)

Buddy Bradley said:
			
		

> Can't see it myself, although I definitely think Balamory's Miss Hoolie is a reet dutty minx away from the nursery...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


eww, no way, I reckon Miss Hoolie only does it with the lights off and eyes firmly shut whilst thinking of Scotland.. though sometimes when watching Balamory the unwholesome vision of PC Plum taking Miss Hoolie from behind does cross my mind...not nice.

I think Josie Jump would be ok out of her tracksuit though (the more recent one that is)..


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## snadge (Nov 26, 2005)

Buddy Bradley said:
			
		

> Can't see it myself, although I definitely think Balamory's Miss Hoolie is a reet dutty minx away from the nursery...



you are taking the piss though, that's minging


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## Lava (Nov 26, 2005)

Anna from toonattik


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## poet (Nov 26, 2005)

snadge said:
			
		

> you are taking the piss though, that's minging



Fuck off, Miss Hoolie's well fit, as is Penny Pocket and...

The entire cast of Hi 5


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## Bajie (Nov 26, 2005)

is it just me or does she have abnormally large cheeks?

Still.. must admit filthy thoughts do cross my mind; I'd give her something to fill those cheeks etc etc 











Penny Pocket certainly does look better when not in Balamory..


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## madamv (Nov 26, 2005)

I love Archie, the inventor, from Balamory...





or maybe its just his pink castle I lust after...

and theres a really cute guy in Tikkabilla too, dunno his name tho so cant get a pic.

Although my bubba doesnt watch those any more


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## Buddy Bradley (Nov 26, 2005)

madamv said:
			
		

> I love Archie, the inventor, from Balamory...


Random fact: the guy who plays Archie is a stand-up comic who used to open for The League of Gentlemen.


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## ChrisFilter (Nov 27, 2005)

i_hate_beckham said:
			
		

> From Tikkabilla.



has she even reached puberty?!


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## i_hate_beckham (Nov 27, 2005)

ChrisFilter said:
			
		

> has she even reached puberty?!


 Yes she has!! She is older than she looks, shes been doing the program since about 2000.


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## sheothebudworths (Nov 27, 2005)

Big cook Ben makes my skin crawl  please don't let him dance again......


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## q_w_e_r_t_y (Nov 27, 2005)

i_hate_beckham said:
			
		

> Yes she has!! She is older than she looks, shes been doing the program since about 2000.



Not mentally tho...she is so annoying!!

Even my children used to think that she was horribly saccarine.


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## Bajie (Nov 27, 2005)

A lot of the presenters on Cbeebies are I think. My son likes it.. well he's only 18months old and he understands the programs, and it is the only channel that is guarented to have programs on his level on all the time (and free of adverts).

But at the same time, their is a certain air to cbeebies that I dont much care for - still it is good there is something for him to watch when he wants to (not that he sits in front of the telly all day   )


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## Kaka Tim (Nov 27, 2005)

I always thought that the women who sometimes read the stories on Telly tubbies was pretty saucy.


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## andy2002 (Nov 27, 2005)

The original Josie Jump (sexy black girl in a Kill Bill-yellow tracky) in Balamory did it for me - she left the show and they replaced her with an unconvincing look-a-like which was rather disappointing.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 11, 2011)

Cerrie Burnell's grown on me loads. She's really not my type - skinny, gangly & blonde - but she's got a lovely kind face that sometimes does a kind of knowing sauciness. 

I watch too much CBeebies.


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## killer b (Mar 11, 2011)

her from 'i can cook'. that's about it though.


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## badlands (Mar 11, 2011)

Josie Jump


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 11, 2011)

killer b said:


> her from 'i can cook'. that's about it though.



Aye. Bit chinny, likes. But nice eyes. Josie Jump is alright. Nisha from Same Smile is lovely, though.


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## badlands (Mar 11, 2011)

Nina when she has her pigtails


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 11, 2011)

Well obviously Nina. She's the nicest one that's ever been on CBeebies apart from _maybe_ Veejay Kaur. I didn't mention her cos I already have on the guilty celeb crushes thread (not that I feel guilty about it).


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## Scaggs (Mar 11, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> Cerrie Burnell's grown on me loads. She's really not my type - skinny, gangly & blonde - but she's got a lovely kind face that sometimes does a kind of knowing sauciness.
> 
> I watch too much CBeebies.



Me too.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

Her appearance on Mastermind did nothing to put me off, either, even though she came last.


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## samk (Mar 12, 2011)

Wait till the daily mail get ahold of this thread


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

I'll punch the Daily Mail in the eye.


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## Maurice Picarda (Mar 12, 2011)

Just wait, parents of toddlers, until your kids are too old for Cbeebies and you'll realise how carefully wrought it was compared with CBBC. Dani's House and Sadie J are so woefully written and woodenly acted that they leave you longing for the days of Rentaghost.


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## Sweet FA (Mar 12, 2011)

Otoh, The Sparticle Mystery's great!


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## killer b (Mar 12, 2011)

Yeah, but cbbc has horrible histories and sorry I've got no head...


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## trashpony (Mar 12, 2011)

i_hate_beckham said:


> From Tikkabilla.


 
God that's an old picture  She's about 40. I can't bear her, hideous voice.

I have a crush on Sid






I also quite like Mr Bloom


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## Maurice Picarda (Mar 12, 2011)

Iplayer means that children can avoid Horrible Histories - they have keen noses for adult approved, Bafta winning stuff - and enjoy a Sadie J marathon every day.


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## Sweet FA (Mar 12, 2011)

Lil'FA's only just started watching cbbc and is obsessed with the SM and MI High. I don't think she really gets it all but she says that cbeebies is 'for babies'. She's 6 in april...


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## polly (Mar 12, 2011)

I like that hippy bloke from Green Balloon Club 

Also Sid after a bit of a twisted dream.

The rest of them on Cbeebies I basically want to kill.

eta I would however deffo shag _anyone _from Horrible Histories, just out of respect


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

polly said:


> The rest of them on Cbeebies I basically want to kill.


 
LOL!


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## souljacker (Mar 12, 2011)

Beth and Amy from Milkshake do it for me


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## Clair De Lune (Mar 12, 2011)

Jesus no.
They are a passionless gang of freaks. They don't even have genitalia in my mind, smooth and plastic like Ken dolls.
Would totally kick that Sarah Jane prick in  her plastic mons though.


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## May Kasahara (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> Cerrie Burnell's grown on me loads. She's really not my type - skinny, gangly & blonde - but she's got a lovely kind face that sometimes does a kind of knowing sauciness.



Especially in the Autumn Song. You know the shot I mean. Pure filth!



trashpony said:


> I have a crush on Sid.
> 
> I also quite like Mr Bloom



Thank god! My son is obsessed with the bloody programme and so I have found myself fixating on Mr Bloom himself to get me through the day 

Sid is the only one of them all that I can actually imagine having sex though. Well, and Cerrie. She looks like she goes out clubbing every night and comes home with her pockets stuffed with phone numbers.


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## trashpony (Mar 12, 2011)

May Kasahara said:


> Especially in the Autumn Song. You know the shot I mean. Pure filth!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 
Sid would rock in bed. As would Mr Bloom I reckon - although he'd be very random. Cerrie is also well naughty. I feel a bit sorry for Sarah Jane. I don't know a single woman who doesn't completely loathe her stupid grinny face and inane giggle. Does she have any friends?


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## fen_boy (Mar 12, 2011)

Nina is pure filth.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

May Kasahara said:


> Especially in the Autumn Song. You know the shot I mean. Pure filth!



This one?


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## machine cat (Mar 12, 2011)




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## polly (Mar 12, 2011)

She looks about ten.

And Cerri! No, no, no. She's awful - pretty, yeah, but awkward and shit. That line she has in the weekend song makes me cringe. It's almost enough to make me want to turn off the telly and do something more fulfilling with my daughter.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

polly said:


> And Cerri! No, no, no. She's awful - pretty, yeah, but awkward and shit.



I _like_ awkward and shit. 



polly said:


> That line she has in the weekend song makes me cringe. It's almost enough to make me want to turn off the telly and do something more fulfilling with my daughter.


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## fen_boy (Mar 12, 2011)

machine cat said:


>


 
We had a weird thread about Lazy Town a while a go. Outed all the paedos.


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## machine cat (Mar 12, 2011)

polly said:


> She looks about ten.


 
She's 19!


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## machine cat (Mar 12, 2011)

fen_boy said:


> We had a weird thread about Lazy Town a while a go. Outed all the paedos.


 
See post above


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## fen_boy (Mar 12, 2011)

machine cat said:


> See post above



She's 19 now.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

machine cat said:


> See post above



It was filmed when she was between 13-16, though.


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## polly (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> I _like_ awkward and shit.


 
Actually that is rather endearing


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## machine cat (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> It was filmed when she was between 13-16, though.


 
She's 19 now.


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## trashpony (Mar 12, 2011)

machine cat said:


> She's 19 now.


 
So? You're still looking at an underage girl and going phwoar. Bleugh


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## polly (Mar 12, 2011)

I have to agree. She doesn't even look older than 16. Bit creepy. Sorry.


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## Boppity (Mar 12, 2011)

trashpony said:


> So? You're still looking at an underage girl and going phwoar. Bleugh


 
Exactly!!!


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## twentythreedom (Mar 12, 2011)

I'm not a parent, but I still would


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## machine cat (Mar 12, 2011)

She;s 19 ffs


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

twentythreedom said:


> I'm not a parent, but I still would



You sick bastard! She's only eleven NOW, and was 0 when they started filming this.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

machine cat said:


> She;s 19 ffs



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hoobs


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## Boppity (Mar 12, 2011)

machine cat said:


> She;s 19 ffs


 
So if you fancy her in images which were taken when she was 19, that's fine.

If you're watching her prance around at 13 and loving it it's weird.


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## machine cat (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hoobs


 
I was replying to the people calling me a kiddy diddler.

The hoobs are awesome but not in a sexy way.


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## Boppity (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> You sick bastard! She's only eleven NOW, and was 0 when they started filming this.


 
That programme has been around for 11 years? Jeez.


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## Dillinger4 (Mar 12, 2011)

I don't own any toddlers but I would smash Helen Skelton.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

machine cat said:


> I was replying to the people calling me a kiddy diddler.



I know. And I was trying the dispel the undoubtedly-accidental-creepiness in the room with a comedy misunderstanding.

And fwiw, nobody called you a kiddy "diddler".


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

Dillinger4 said:


> I don't own any toddlers but I would smash Helen Skelton.



It's sad when you realise you have no idea who any of the Blue Peter presenters are, and that they're all younger than you. I think the last lot I could safely quite fancy (or even knew who they were) were Konie Huq & Romana D'Annunzio.


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## Dillinger4 (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> It's sad when you realise you have no idea who any of the Blue Peter presenters are, and that they're all younger than you. I think the last lot I could safely quite fancy (or even knew who they were) were Konie Huq & Romana D'Annunzio.



I don't know who any of the other ones are. Just her, because I would smash her like CERN.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

Dillinger4 said:


> I don't know who any of the other ones are. Just her, because I would smash her like CERN.



And they say romance is dead.

"Hiya, love, you're that bird offa Blue Peter, right? I'm Dillinger4, and I'm gonna smash ya...like CERN."


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## Boppity (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> And they say romance is dead.
> 
> "Hiya, love, you're that bird offa Blue Peter, right? I'm Dillinger4, and I'm gonna smash ya...like CERN."


 
I don't know any hot-blooded ladies who wouldn't swoon at that.


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## Dillinger4 (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> And they say romance is dead.
> 
> "Hiya, love, you're that bird offa Blue Peter, right? I'm Dillinger4, and I'm gonna smash ya...like CERN."


 
Large Hardon Collider.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

Boppity said:


> I don't know any hot-blooded ladies who wouldn't swoon at that.



I've been doing it wrong with the gently self-deprecating humour and the being interested and the manners and that.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

Dillinger4 said:


> Large Hardon Collider.





I couldn't make that joke for fear of future disappointments.


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## machine cat (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> And fwiw, nobody called you a kiddy "diddler".


 
She's 19 ffs


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## Boppity (Mar 12, 2011)

Steel☼Icarus said:


> I've been doing it wrong with the gently self-deprecating humour and the being interested and the manners and that.


 
Oh yes, your whole girl-pulling life. Totally wrong.


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2011)

Boppity said:


> Oh yes, your whole girl-pulling life. Totally wrong.



Ah well. At least I'm not a puppet-botherer.


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## Steel Icarus (May 11, 2011)

I don't really know what's going on with the bedtime stories on CBeebies. They seem to be going through my freebie list. Holly Willoughby, Mishal Husain, Liza Tarbuck (although she is looking quite mumsy now - not that that's a bad thing). I'm telling you, if Monica Raymund from Lie to me turns up next I'll be ringing the papers. Or Derren Brown.


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