# Coronavirus meme/panic/fear mongering general thread



## Fez909 (Feb 29, 2020)

The other thread in p&p is serious and has been attracting more attention lately, so this thread is for anything trivial, funny, conspiracy bull, etc

Let's start with the people trying to cash in on the outbreak


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## bimble (Feb 29, 2020)

Some mental stuff in here, quanon people gurgling bleach etc.








						QAnon conspiracy theorists are telling people to drink bleach as a cure against the deadly Wuhan coronavirus
					

Consuming the toxic bleach, also known as "Miracle Mineral Solution," causes severe nausea, vomiting, and can even be fatal.




					www.businessinsider.com


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## bimble (Feb 29, 2020)




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## farmerbarleymow (Feb 29, 2020)

bimble said:


> Some mental stuff in here, quanon people gurgling bleach etc.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


MMS is a hardy perennial, and pops up in all sorts of paranoid conspiraloon shit.

This thread made me check the abysmal whale . to and surprisingly they haven't published any ravings about the current virus - the nearest entries are for SARS.


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## Marty1 (Feb 29, 2020)




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## weepiper (Feb 29, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 1, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 1, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 1, 2020)




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## de_dog (Mar 1, 2020)

One of my silvery hats has been twitching with the news of improved air quality over parts of China.
Presuming that the aerosol masking effect is real (hence posting on this thread), I'm wondering if we'll see any measurable increase in regional temperature(s) and what that might mean if other parts of the world have a 'shut down'.


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## Griff (Mar 1, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 1, 2020)




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## QueenOfGoths (Mar 1, 2020)

There is a confirmed case of the virus not to far from here in Woodley. 

When it was initially announced as being in "Berkshire" the Facebook sites for Maidenhead went into meltdown. It was someone on the Bomber Estate, the Poundfield Estate, from a local school etc... usually from information supplied by that reliable source "a friend's Uncle/Aunt/Cousin/Mate" 

Mind you I went into to work today to find we have run out of hand sanitizer and wet wipes plus sales of soup, pasta, UHT milk and bottled water have increased quite a bit.


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## polly (Mar 1, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 200222



I have read that it can be spread via farts though... 









						Fart pant inventor now wants to stop coronavirus spread
					

Paul O’Leary working on mask using fart filtering carbon material from his Shreddies line of underwear




					www.business-live.co.uk
				



 - oh that's not it, hold on

Not this either but closer: Do farts spread novel coronavirus? A Beijing district CDC answers … - Global Times

If the masks can't stop the little aerosol particles, how can pants?


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## wayward bob (Mar 1, 2020)




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## Jay Park (Mar 1, 2020)




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## Steel Icarus (Mar 1, 2020)

Grimsby ASDA out of handwash and sanitizer


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## pesh (Mar 1, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 1, 2020)

Jay Park said:


> View attachment 200226



Same here.


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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 1, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Same here.
> 
> View attachment 200240


I bet their comms team are having an exceptionally bad time at the moment.


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## Supine (Mar 1, 2020)




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## Marty1 (Mar 1, 2020)




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## cyril_smear (Mar 1, 2020)

It's found its way in to Leeds and Bradford now. It's starting to get a bit worrying now that it's spreading like mad.


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## Marty1 (Mar 1, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> It's found its way in to Leeds and Bradford now. It's starting to get a bit worrying now that it's spreading like mad.



Any articles you can link?


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 1, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Any articles you can link?











						Twelve more coronavirus cases takes UK total to 35
					

Three patients are close contacts of a man from Surrey, who was the first to be infected within the UK.




					www.bbc.co.uk


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 1, 2020)

Still almost all UK cases have been to danger areas. As yet not an outbreak. As yet


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## Marty1 (Mar 1, 2020)

Interesting vlog by a Russian bloke in Hubei Province.


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## cyril_smear (Mar 1, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Any articles you can link?













						Coronavirus in Yorkshire - how the first few days unfolded
					

The latest on the coronavirus outbreak in Yorkshire




					www.leeds-live.co.uk


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## Marty1 (Mar 1, 2020)




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## MickiQ (Mar 1, 2020)

bimble said:


> View attachment 200154


At least they seemed to have seen the funny side of it


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## Mation (Mar 1, 2020)

polly said:


> If the masks can't stop the little aerosol particles, how can pants?


You have to wear them on your head. More material than ordinary masks. Science.


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## Fez909 (Mar 1, 2020)

My girlfriend is helping me keep my health anxiety in check


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## cupid_stunt (Mar 2, 2020)

Great choice of picture for the headline.


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## pesh (Mar 2, 2020)




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## two sheds (Mar 2, 2020)

A link for anyone wanting to stock up on essentials from an ethical supplier at rock bottom prices:









						Alex Jones’ Infowars is attempting to profit from the coronavirus outbreak
					






					www.mediamatters.org


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## QueenOfGoths (Mar 2, 2020)

Overnight we had delivery of 4 cases of Carex Hand Gel, that's 60 small bottles.

The shop opened at 7.00am, all the bottles were sold by 8.00am!

We are also short of bread flour and out of stock of yeast, which we never run out of, so I think people are planning on making their own bread to have their stockpiled baked beans on!

Fuck knows what will happen if there is a confirmed case in the town!


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## High Voltage (Mar 2, 2020)

Just to be clear . . . is this a second stock pile of food because of the Corona virus or is this an addition to the stock pile of food for Brexit


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## MrSki (Mar 2, 2020)




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## MickiQ (Mar 2, 2020)

The place where I am currently working has sent round an email advising us not to go to Iran, China or Italy and to make sure we wash our hands when we go to the khazi. They're monitoring the situation which I suspect meand that someone in HR gets to Google it each morning.
I feel safer already


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## bellaozzydog (Mar 2, 2020)

MickiQ said:


> The place where I am currently working has sent round an email advising us not to go to Iran, China or Italy and to make sure we wash our hands when we go to the khazi. They're monitoring the situation which I suspect meand that someone in HR gets to Google it each morning.
> I feel safer already



what we all require is a rubber band bangle with instructions on hand washing and an emergency number to ring if we feel squiffy


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## elbows (Mar 2, 2020)




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## alsoknownas (Mar 2, 2020)

pesh said:


>


Is that just being handed out to the general public everywhere?


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## MrSki (Mar 2, 2020)




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## two sheds (Mar 2, 2020)

MrSki said:


>




Copy may need to go to: 



			https://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/sing-god-save-the-queen-while-wash-hands.369672


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## MrSki (Mar 2, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Copy may need to go to:
> 
> 
> 
> https://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/sing-god-save-the-queen-while-wash-hands.369672


Your wish...


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## Puddy_Tat (Mar 2, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 3, 2020)




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## elbows (Mar 3, 2020)

Text is from the BBC live updates page at 16:15 https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/world-51716375



> *Brazil investigates church's 'immunisation' gathering*
> Authorities in Brazil have opened an investigation into an evangelical church - known as the Global Cathedral of the Holy Spirit - in the city of Porto Alegre.
> The church had promoted one of its gatherings as a way of "immunising" its followers against coronavirus, Efe news agency reports.
> A reporter for Spanish newspaper El Pais tweeted about the police investigation and included a poster image for the gathering that reads: "The power of God against the coronavirus."


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## Puddy_Tat (Mar 3, 2020)




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## danny la rouge (Mar 4, 2020)

Translation: 

Oh, that story we just told you? We overstated it to make a better headline and now we’re backtracking.


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## Proper Tidy (Mar 4, 2020)




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## Fez909 (Mar 4, 2020)




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## Supine (Mar 4, 2020)

Train travel skills


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## existentialist (Mar 4, 2020)

Supine said:


> Train travel skills
> 
> View attachment 200600


You may laugh, but when gauntletted gallon-bottle-gasmask-clingfilm-baglady is bestriding some peak in her leather kilt and armoured bodice as she surveys the bleak wilderness that is a depopulated planet, it won't so funny then, will it? Hmm?


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## Supine (Mar 4, 2020)

existentialist said:


> You may laugh, but when gauntletted gallon-bottle-gasmask-clingfilm-baglady is bestriding some peak in her leather kilt and armoured bodice as she surveys the bleak wilderness that is a depopulated planet, it won't so funny then, will it? Hmm?



As a man with a smokers cough and a weekly need to travel hundreds of miles by train I'm using this picture as an idea for PPE.


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## Mumbles274 (Mar 4, 2020)

Supine said:


> Train travel skills
> 
> View attachment 200600


Having worked with people with OCD and health anxiety I can see how this could be a behaviour that makes sense. I get why it seems funny, but also think it shows that some people really do 'worry' about things like this and it's very distressing. No criticism for sharing this pic intended, it makes sense why


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## weltweit (Mar 4, 2020)

I was just at a meeting with perhaps 50 people. A few people were coughing, only occasionally but it got me thinking. It could be very easy to get infected by this thing, especially as people can be infectious before they have any symptoms.


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## two sheds (Mar 4, 2020)

I've got a nasty cold/cough at the moment, last time I was in city I made a point of going outside shops into the street when I needed to cough, but often not much you can do when a coughing fit overtakes.


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## Puddy_Tat (Mar 4, 2020)




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## elbows (Mar 4, 2020)




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## Steel Icarus (Mar 4, 2020)

weltweit said:


> I was just at a meeting with perhaps 50 people. A few people were coughing, only occasionally but it got me thinking. It could be very easy to get infected by this thing, especially as people can be infectious before they have any symptoms.


Quick, you should phone the authorities and let them know coronavirus is quite infectious


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## Chilli.s (Mar 4, 2020)

Was queuing at the checkouts with my panic stock up. The assistant coughed into their hand and then started scanning my shopping through, touching every single item...


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## Indeliblelink (Mar 4, 2020)

oh yeah


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## Proper Tidy (Mar 4, 2020)

My other half has been getting extra so not having a pop, it's understandable, but it must make things difficult for a lot of people. People on tight budgets who live week to week budget wise so can't stock up, older people who can't get out to do their shopping very often, get to supermarkets and there is no shit paper, no soap, no fucking tins of soup or whatever


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## Puddy_Tat (Mar 4, 2020)

in Reading (from local newspaper website)


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 4, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> My other half has been getting extra so not having a pop, it's understandable, but it must make things difficult for a lot of people. People on tight budgets who live week to week budget wise so can't stock up, older people who can't get out to do their shopping very often, get to supermarkets and there is no shit paper, no soap, no fucking tins of soup or whatever


Yeah, I'm getting a bit extra each time I go to the shop, tins and that, but no large amounts. We're not at that stage.


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## Buddy Bradley (Mar 5, 2020)

two sheds said:


> I've got a nasty cold/cough at the moment, last time I was in city I made a point of going outside shops into the street when I needed to cough, but often not much you can do when a coughing fit overtakes.


I had some water go down the wrong way and had a massive coughing fit last night - god knows what the people in the neighbouring hotel rooms were thinking...


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## Hollis (Mar 5, 2020)

Good advice here..


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## bimble (Mar 5, 2020)




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## Steel Icarus (Mar 5, 2020)

Just did three sneezes on the bus. Two school kids moved seats away from me.
Perfect result tbh


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## Mrs Miggins (Mar 5, 2020)

It's all kicking off in Australia...


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## Mrs Miggins (Mar 5, 2020)




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## Mrs Miggins (Mar 5, 2020)

They're panic buying bog roll in New Zealand as well but queuing politely rather than trying to kill each other.


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## Yossarian (Mar 5, 2020)

Hollis said:


> Good advice here..




Sunlight is apparently good at killing viruses, so we can probably expect to see an ad from Corona rivals Sol featuring a bottle of Sol crushing a lot of sickly, coughing Coronas.


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## wayward bob (Mar 5, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> Sunlight is apparently good at killing viruses


<glances out of window>
<despairs>


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## cupid_stunt (Mar 5, 2020)




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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 5, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> It's all kicking off in Australia...
> View attachment 200635


She was probably dying for a shit - desparate measures and all that.


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## MickiQ (Mar 5, 2020)

S☼I said:


> Yeah, I'm getting a bit extra each time I go to the shop, tins and that, but no large amounts. We're not at that stage.


We were using up our No Deal Brexit hoard but have now started expanding it again


farmerbarleymow said:


> She was probably dying for a shit - desparate measures and all that.


Have  been in the position of really really needing to take a shit and being unable to do so I am going to reserve judgement on this one.


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## The39thStep (Mar 5, 2020)




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## Numbers (Mar 5, 2020)




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## xsunnysuex (Mar 5, 2020)

🤣🤣


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## Pickman's model (Mar 5, 2020)

xsunnysuex said:


> 🤣🤣
> 
> View attachment 200663


of course each of these would be equally proof against facial recognition


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## elbows (Mar 5, 2020)

__





						Asterix 'predicted' coronavirus
					

Did Asterix predict the coronavirus outbreak?




					www.connexionfrance.com


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## Supine (Mar 5, 2020)




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## keybored (Mar 5, 2020)




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## neonwilderness (Mar 5, 2020)




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## pogofish (Mar 5, 2020)

I've just read an American on another board pronouncing that they are going to be taking biodegradable plates and plastic cutlery with them for visits to (largely high-end) restaurants on their upcoming visit to London...!


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## neonwilderness (Mar 5, 2020)

Dogs at this year's Crufts being advised to lick own backsides for at least 20 seconds
					

After sponsors of Crufts asked their staff not to attend the dog show citing Coronavirus fears, the event’s organisers have announced additional precautions against the spread of infection, including asking all competing dogs to spend at least 20 seconds when they lick their own rear ends.




					newsthump.com


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## A380 (Mar 5, 2020)




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## T & P (Mar 5, 2020)

Supine said:


> Train travel skills
> 
> View attachment 200600


I bet Shippy has that manga...


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## pogofish (Mar 5, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 200714



That is going-up in the bogs at work tomorrow - Thanks!


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## pogofish (Mar 5, 2020)

A meeting at work decided we should have some form of steriliser/cleaner in every room where shared keyboards etc are.

Needless to say, hand gel is not a viable option.

So they will buy Vodka and put it in spray bottles - but we’ve not to tell anyone .


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## spanglechick (Mar 5, 2020)

pogofish said:


> A meeting at work decided we should have some form of steriliser/cleaner in every room where shared keyboards etc are.
> 
> Needless to say, hand gel is not a viable option.
> 
> So they will buy Vodka and put it in spray bottles - but we’ve not to tell anyone .


Vodka doesn’t have a very high alcohol content.  You’re better with surgical spirit.


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## pogofish (Mar 6, 2020)

I’m not the ones making those decisions.

A much better qualified colleague preferred that we use Gin.


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## two sheds (Mar 6, 2020)

spanglechick said:


> Vodka doesn’t have a very high alcohol content.  You’re better with surgical spirit.



Leaves a nasty taste afterburn though


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## Shippou-Sensei (Mar 6, 2020)

T & P said:


> I bet Shippy has that manga...


budget cosplay is difficult


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## Supine (Mar 6, 2020)

pogofish said:


> A meeting at work decided we should have some form of steriliser/cleaner in every room where shared keyboards etc are.
> 
> Needless to say, hand gel is not a viable option.
> 
> So they will buy Vodka and put it in spray bottles - but we’ve not to tell anyone .



Shameful. Why not just provide soap and water instead of something that may not actually work. What kind of a shitshow do you work at?


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## hipipol (Mar 6, 2020)

*$194 for hand sanitizer? You must be joking*








						Reuters | Breaking International News & Views
					

Find latest news from every corner of the globe at Reuters.com, your online source for breaking international news coverage.




					uk.reuters.com


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## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2020)

It's all down to 5G masts apparently.  



> One much-mooted theory, for example, is that the coronavirus has been caused by radiation from 5G masts.











						How Facebook turned into a coronavirus conspiracy hellhole
					

In the wake of the Covid-19 outbreak, groups that used to share flight deals and debate Jeremy Corbyn are pivoting to coronavirus conspiracies




					www.wired.co.uk


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## SpookyFrank (Mar 6, 2020)

spanglechick said:


> Vodka doesn’t have a very high alcohol content.  You’re better with surgical spirit.



Neat vodka might be OK but all the hand sanitiser 'recipes' I've seen passed around involve cutting it with aloe vera lotion or whatever else, at which point you'd merely be getting the germs a bit tipsy rather than killing them.

Just wash your hands.


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## SpookyFrank (Mar 6, 2020)

hipipol said:


> *$194 for hand sanitizer? You must be joking*
> 
> 
> 
> ...



It'll mostly be third party online sellers doing this, not sure what meangingful action you can take against them. Amazon and ebay aren't subject to mortal laws or regulations, and even if they were they'd only pass the buck.


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## tommers (Mar 6, 2020)

pogofish said:


> That is going-up in the bogs at work tomorrow - Thanks!


Just blatantly nicked it too.


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## Mrs Miggins (Mar 6, 2020)




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## bimble (Mar 6, 2020)

I'm cunningly going to buy TWO toothpastes today. Reckon living without toothpaste for two weeks would be worse than without loo roll. Just did a few days in india where a couple of buckets is what you get instead of toilet paper and it was fine, really.


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## Mrs Miggins (Mar 6, 2020)

bimble said:


> I'm cunningly going to buy TWO toothpastes today. Reckon living without toothpaste for two weeks would be worse than without loo roll. Just did a few days in india where a couple of buckets is what you get instead of toilet paper and it was fine, really.


I think you're right. Let's all stock up on toothpaste quietly before anyone else catches in.

And washing yourself with water is much better than toilet paper IMO.


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## Yossarian (Mar 6, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> I think you're right. Let's all stock up on toothpaste quietly before anyone else catches in.



The Australians must have heard you.









						Forget toilet paper! Now it's toothpaste that's selling out at supermarkets as Aussies panic buy | LifeStyle
					

Panic-buying has now switched from toilet rolls to toothpaste across Australia




					www.lifestyle.com.au


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## Mrs Miggins (Mar 6, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> The Australians must have heard you.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Well I can be quite loud


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## Nivag (Mar 6, 2020)

Coronavirus equals UK mortality rate of Michael Barrymore's swimming pool - The Rochdale Herald
					

The Government has announced that as many people in the UK have died from Coronavirus as have been found dead in Michael Barrymore's swimming pool. A -




					rochdaleherald.co.uk


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## MrSki (Mar 6, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2020)




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## JuanTwoThree (Mar 6, 2020)

We seem to have woken up in the Middle Ages.

One confirmed case of Coronavirus in the next town was a Gitano man. So his contacts here do tend to be Gitanos too, for reasons like extended families and so on. Because of some problems with getting the message into the community there was a problem with one family not self-isolating successfully;  and it's not that straightforward to get deliveries etc if you don't have credit cards or sick pay if you  work as a day labourer off the system. So last night the ambulances went round with the Guardia Civil tooled up in riot vans and of course  got attacked by the set-upon Gitano family in question, members of a community that have a 500 year memory of this kind of thing.

So now I'm being told that 'they' are spreading it deliberately and 'they 'all' have got it'.

One child in our primary school has been confirmed as having coronavirus. They haven't been to school since the isolation, but some of the payos (non Gitanos) are pulling their children away from their Gitano classmates and shunning the mothers. Not that they didn't before. But now they're talking about it.


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## pogofish (Mar 6, 2020)

Supine said:


> Shameful. Why not just provide soap and water instead of something that may not actually work. What kind of a shitshow do you work at?



We do - but proper wash stations are only provided in labs or other places where it is a reasonable/legal requirement. There is another layer of spaces/offices where people have to go to the bogs to wash. Plus, some of our guys are acknowledged experts in the field (eg Gin man - he’s been all over the media already).

It has been decided that we must be seen to be taking steps at every potential risk point, even if it’s just window dressing.

There was a big videoconference of senior bods from all over the U.K. on Wednesday afternoon, where they hammered out a control strategy to be followed nationally


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## keybored (Mar 6, 2020)

pogofish said:


> A meeting at work decided we should have some form of steriliser/cleaner in every room where shared keyboards etc are.
> 
> Needless to say, hand gel is not a viable option.
> 
> So they will buy Vodka and put it in spray bottles - but we’ve not to tell anyone .



I buy this for work, 5 litres of 99.9% isopropanol for £20. You'd probably need to water it down to a point where it's not so highly flammable.








						Hexeal IPA 99.9% | 5L | Lab Grade | Isopropyl Alcohol/Isopropanol 99.9% 635346986864 | eBay
					

Isopropyl Alcohol 99.9% is used widely as a solvent and as a cleaning fluid. Our Isopropyl Alcohol easily removes glue, grease, ink and varnish. It also has many other uses such as, a household cleaner to sanitise surfaces when diluted.



					www.ebay.co.uk


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## pogofish (Mar 6, 2020)

That would have been my suggestion if anyone asked but I’ve posted on my troubles with Isopropanol before - Back when I used to order it in significant quantities for microscope/optical equipment users to clean eyepieces etc, I attracted the high-ups wrath because it comes under the drug precursors legislation and they had to explain to the DS why I was buying so much, regularly!

But nobody got any nasty eye infections or parasites on my watch, so I felt justified. Although we did agree on a target quantity that I wouldn’t exceed in stock
IIRC, a viable working dilution was @40/45%?


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## Nine Bob Note (Mar 6, 2020)

No hand gel left at work, so they’re panic-buying toilet rolls and milk instead


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## Pickman's model (Mar 6, 2020)

Nine Bob Note said:


> No hand gel left at work, so they’re panic-buying toilet rolls and milk instead


soap and milk will do the trick


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## High Voltage (Mar 6, 2020)

WHO from wiki



> *Composition[edit]*
> Consumer alcohol-based hand sanitizers, and health care "hand alcohol" or "alcohol hand antiseptic agents" exist in liquid, foam, and easy-flowing gel formulations. Products with 60% to 95% alcohol by volume are effective antiseptics. Lower or higher concentrations are less effective; most products contain between 60% and 80% alcohol.[48]
> 
> In addition to alcohol (ethanol, isopropanol or n-Propanol), hand sanitizers also contain the following:[48]
> ...


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## i_hate_beckham (Mar 6, 2020)




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## keybored (Mar 6, 2020)

pogofish said:


> it comes under the drug precursors legislation


No it doesn't.  I've been buying in bulk for 2 decades, my door would be kicked off its hinges by now if IPA was a precursor


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## neonwilderness (Mar 6, 2020)

NHS confident it can swiftly eradicate Coronavirus thanks to the extra £350m per week it now receives
					

The Coronavirus will not be an issue for much longer thanks to the cash-rich NHS, according to the government.




					newsthump.com


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## hipipol (Mar 6, 2020)

keybored said:


> I buy this for work, 5 litres of 99.9% isopropanol for £20. You'd probably need to water it down to a point where it's not so highly flammable.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Peckhams fab range of nylon wig salons have gallons of the stuff, where I got mine, but most people seem to be laying seige to Boots and other emporia of that ilk


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## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2020)

*New emojis released...*


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## LDC (Mar 6, 2020)




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## Steel Icarus (Mar 6, 2020)

Lol, as if we've got a Coronavirus forum

Snotting and spotting,
Coughing and scoffing


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## Winot (Mar 6, 2020)

Well central London pubs are fucking packed as ever this evening


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## petee (Mar 6, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2020)




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## AmateurAgitator (Mar 6, 2020)

NHS confident it can swiftly eradicate Coronavirus thanks to the extra £350m per week it now receives
					

The Coronavirus will not be an issue for much longer thanks to the cash-rich NHS, according to the government.




					newsthump.com


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## pesh (Mar 6, 2020)




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## Jeremiah18.17 (Mar 6, 2020)

Winot said:


> Well central London pubs are fucking packed as ever this evening


Tonight they’re gonna party like it’s 1665.....


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## Yuwipi Woman (Mar 6, 2020)




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## MrSki (Mar 6, 2020)




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## cupid_stunt (Mar 7, 2020)




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## Sprocket. (Mar 7, 2020)

plague doctor costumes approximately £45 from various vendors.


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## brogdale (Mar 7, 2020)

Just gave the 111 questionnaire a go (I've saved you the time; don't bother) and it appears completely unfit for purpose if, as the authorities are suggesting, that community transmission is live. It basically asks you if you've been to any 'affected' area or met anyone diagnosed and, if you say 'No' to these then you're free to go down 'spoons as usual. Brilliant!


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## JuanTwoThree (Mar 7, 2020)

JuanTwoThree said:


> We seem to have woken up in the Middle Ages.
> 
> One confirmed case of Coronavirus in the next town was a Gitano man. So his contacts here do tend to be Gitanos too, for reasons like extended families and so on. Because of some problems with getting the message into the community there was a problem with one family not self-isolating successfully;  and it's not that straightforward to get deliveries etc if you don't have credit cards or sick pay if you  work as a day labourer off the system. So last night the ambulances went round with the Guardia Civil tooled up in riot vans and of course  got attacked by the set-upon Gitano family in question, members of a community that have a 500 year memory of this kind of thing.
> 
> ...




Apparently there was a wedding not far away in Vitoria attended by that local man, who had been in Italy. As a result the vast majority of people affected in this part of La Rioja and in the Basque Country were at the wedding, or in contact with people who were. But the racist rumours continue, one being that he had escaped from hospital. What is not a rumour is that there's a police car permanently outside each house of the same quarantined people, though whether that's  because some of them haven't properly understood the situation and had broken quarantine or because the police are being typically heavy-handed is not entirely clear.  Some of the first maybe but a lot of the second. And to stop the modern equivalents of 'villagers with pitchforks and firebrands' too. which could happen. It's a heady brew of paranoia and racism that I live at ground zero of. I live between the two red circles at 12 o'clock. Happy days!


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Mar 7, 2020)

JuanTwoThree said:


> One child in our primary school has been confirmed as having coronavirus. They haven't been to school since the isolation, but some of the payos (non Gitanos) are pulling their children away from their Gitano classmates and shunning the mothers. Not that they didn't before. But now they're talking about it.




Shamefacedly I admit  that I've been listening to rumours too. The little child was in fact someone I have taught. They've been off school and not coming to our place, with a chest infection  and are going back on Monday.  I hadn't realised this was what everybody was talking about. The mother has said she'll see anybody who says different in court. So not coronavirus. Though it's true about the mothers mugging off the Gitano kids more than ever.  

It's a very tense situation and I am not sure what or who I believe.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## JuanTwoThree (Mar 7, 2020)

Screening


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 7, 2020)

People are actually making (and watching) 'coronavirus porn' now
					

Because nothing is more erotic than a global viral epidemic, there is now coronavirus porn and (some) people are loving it.




					www.indy100.com


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## Lazy Llama (Mar 7, 2020)

Waitrose, Canary Wharf toilet roll aisle this afternoon.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 7, 2020)

Lazy Llama said:


> Waitrose, Canary Wharf toilet roll aisle this afternoon.
> View attachment 200920



I was getting low on bog roll, so was relieved that the local Tesco Extra sill had some, when I went to do my bi-weekly 'big shop' this morning, but they didn't have that much more than in that picture, about 80% of the bog roll section was empty. Apparently the local Asda has totally sold out. 

WTF are people doing buying up so much bog-roll? It's not as if this virus causes the shits!

Most of our bog-roll is produced in the UK, or imported from Europe & the biggest EU supplier has stock-piled 'shit-loads' in the UK over fears of a no-deal brexit, so there's no problem with the supply line.

I guess idiots will be idiots.

On a side note, I hate & rarely do a 'big shop' on a Saturday, the place is far too crowded, but I found this morning that I could clear a path easily by just having a bit of a coughing fit.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 7, 2020)

Oh, all the pasta & rice sections were sold out, and the tinned food section was half empty too. 

Apparently there's also been a run on toothpaste & tooth brushes, are people going to start using tooth brushes to clean their arses if they can't get bog-rolls?


----------



## bimble (Mar 7, 2020)

actual lol








						Half A Cushelle Toilet Roll.  | eBay
					

Half A Cushelle Toilet Roll.. Condition is New. Dispatched with Royal Mail 2nd Class.



					www.ebay.co.uk


----------



## existentialist (Mar 7, 2020)

I have 22 toilet rolls, but not due to any particular panic buying...

I've also got 24 tins of chopped tomatoes, likewise. And 2kg of lentils.


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Mar 7, 2020)

Spanish town faces police lockdown to contain coronavirus
					

Residents in Haro told to stay home after 60 of country’s cases traced to funeral in nearby city




					www.theguardian.com
				




Makes an unwelcome change from some guff about tapas and vineyards.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 7, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I have 22 toilet rolls, but not due to any particular panic buying...
> 
> I've also got 24 tins of chopped tomatoes, likewise. And 2kg of lentils.



On a diet of lentils & chopped tomatoes, you're going to need those bog-rolls.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 7, 2020)

Watch out if you start growing an extra finger! 

According to this you do get the shits so the panic buying of bog roll seems justified.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 7, 2020)

In case anyone still doesn't know how to wash their hands, here's legendary Indian batsman Sachin Tendulkar to show you:


----------



## MrSki (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 7, 2020)

Lazy Llama said:


> Waitrose, Canary Wharf toilet roll aisle this afternoon.
> View attachment 200920



Must be a London thing - there’s load up North.


----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## 8115 (Mar 7, 2020)

The worst has happened. Coronavirus Moral Maze. No Melanie Phillips though. The universe isn't that cruel.


----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 7, 2020)




----------



## YouSir (Mar 8, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Must be a London thing - there’s load up North.



Not a London thing, didn't even realise there was panic buying when I went the other day and there was plenty in.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 8, 2020)

YouSir said:


> Not a London thing, didn't even realise there was panic buying when I went the other day and there was plenty in.



Must be a Waitrose thing then.  Plenty in Tesco and Sainsbury’s etc - anti-bacterial hand wash is a different matter altogether though - sold out almost everywhere.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)

__





						Nonreligious Questions
					

Whether you’ve been turned off by religion in the past or have a question about one of the world’s religions, check out what Patheos has to offer.




					www.patheos.com


----------



## existentialist (Mar 8, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> View attachment 200966
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Looking forward to her putting this to the test...


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Looking forward to her putting this to the test...


It's a very odd world view isn't it? If god has created the world and everything in it - which I assume she believes - where does she think this virus has come from?


----------



## existentialist (Mar 8, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> It's a very odd world view isn't it? If god has created the world and everything in it - which I assume she believes - where does she think this virus has come from?


All the bad stuff comes from the Devil.


----------



## cyril_smear (Mar 8, 2020)

Hollis said:


> Good advice here..



I've been doing that for years


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> All the bad stuff comes from the Devil.


Who is also god's creation, no? Baffling these people. Truly baffling.
Maybe the virus comes from aliens. But if god created the universe then he created the aliens to. There's no way out of this!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Mar 8, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> where does she think this virus has come from?


I don't know but I just realised Corona is an anagram of Racoon, which is surely a strong clue.


----------



## Supine (Mar 8, 2020)

Shooting the virus is a novel idea


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 8, 2020)

Supine said:


> Shooting the virus is a novel idea




This is a country where the government has to tell people not to shoot hurricanes remember.


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 8, 2020)

£3.5k for sitting around for two weeks you say? 









						Coronavirus volunteers to be paid £3,500 and infected with a form of the bug
					

Brave volunteers will be tested with a form of coronavirus for a £3,500 sum in an east London lab as the world reels from the killer bug which has left many dead across the world




					www.dailystar.co.uk


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 8, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> £3.5k for sitting around for two weeks you say?
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Those are not the covid-19 strain and that's not a million miles off what you can get for doing a similar trial with 'flu.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 8, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> It's a very odd world view isn't it? If god has created the world and everything in it - which I assume she believes - where does she think this virus has come from?


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Mar 8, 2020)

"In Spain, police reported they were preparing to lock down entire blocks of flats after dozens of coronavirus cases were traced to a funeral held in the Basque country two weeks ago. Spain has so far confirmed 430 cases of the virus – 60 of which originated among people who attended the funeral service in the Basque city of Vitoria-Gasteiz with most concentrated in the nearby towns of Haro and Casalarreina.

Local authorities said police would be “reinforcing home isolation controls” in Haro and limiting access to the town’s health centre. “We need to take exceptional measures designed to stop the transmission of the illness,” said the regional health minister, Sara Alba. The death toll from the virus in Spain currently stands at 10"

These 'entire blocks of flats' are smallish buildings like those in the photo, inhabited by extended families.  Some papers were using this picture of a street that has been closed for months:

to show that we are under martial law.


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Mar 8, 2020)

Here is the Rapid Response Group, one in a bio-hazard suit, at the corner of our street.


----------



## magneze (Mar 8, 2020)

Fuck 

Went to supermarket this morning (South London) - normally would be 20 mins in and out. Took over an hour. Big queues, everyone had toilet paper.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)

magneze said:


> Fuck
> 
> Went to supermarket this morning (South London) - normally would be 20 mins in and out. Took over an hour. Big queues, everyone had toilet paper.


Jesus fucking wept what is wrong with people??


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)

I honestly think people are expecting a zombie apocalypse.


----------



## magneze (Mar 8, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Jesus fucking wept what is wrong with people??


Pasta was mostly sold out. No paracetemol. Everything else seemed fine but ridiculously busy.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Steel Icarus (Mar 8, 2020)

Kinell, that genuine?


----------



## existentialist (Mar 8, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> I honestly think people are expecting a zombie apocalypse.


Nobody expects the zombie apocalypse.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 8, 2020)

I posted this on another thread


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 8, 2020)

JuanTwoThree have you seen _el bar?_(The Bar (film) - Wikipedia)


----------



## dessiato (Mar 8, 2020)

wayward bob said:


> JuanTwoThree have you seen _el bar?_(The Bar (film) - Wikipedia)


That sounds a good, if bleak film.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 8, 2020)

dessiato said:


> That sounds a good, if bleak film.


it's really funny


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 8, 2020)

wayward bob said:


> it's really funny


Is it similar to Delicatessen? That’s a film I enjoy


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 8, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Is it similar to Delicatessen? That’s a film I enjoy


Cracking film , I like most of that directors stuff , quirky humour .


----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Nobody expects the zombie apocalypse.


To be honest with the current state of the world, I don’t think a zombie apocalypse would make much difference.


----------



## Numbers (Mar 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> All the bad stuff comes from the Devil.


Always convenient.


----------



## elbows (Mar 8, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> To be honest with the current state of the world, I don’t think a zombie apocalypse would make much difference.



I think it may be difficult to get the zombies to follow the proper hand washing procedures.


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 8, 2020)

Not sure what the point of this “parody” account is, other than to spread deliberate gear and misinformation.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 8, 2020)

I think the first sighting of that one was during Hurricane Harvey.


----------



## circleline (Mar 8, 2020)

Our local 'big' tesco has sold out of loo rolls, hand-wash and pasta.. _sigh_  Someone on social media saying at 1430pm today they bought the last pack of pasta..

It could still snow, you know..


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 8, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> View attachment 201016


I was in the big Tesco in Maryhill this morning. There were no shortages of anything.


----------



## T & P (Mar 8, 2020)

This thread is ace and funnier than the Bandwidth one. It is now my first port of call for giggles


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 8, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> I think the first sighting of that one was during Hurricane Harvey.
> 
> View attachment 201019


There’s probably loads of these all with a different country attached to them. Same as the Gibraltar Tesco one after Brexit .


----------



## T & P (Mar 8, 2020)

JuanTwoThree said:


> "In Spain, police reported they were preparing to lock down entire blocks of flats after dozens of coronavirus cases were traced to a funeral held in the Basque country two weeks ago. Spain has so far confirmed 430 cases of the virus – 60 of which originated among people who attended the funeral service in the Basque city of Vitoria-Gasteiz with most concentrated in the nearby towns of Haro and Casalarreina.
> 
> Local authorities said police would be “reinforcing home isolation controls” in Haro and limiting access to the town’s health centre. “We need to take exceptional measures designed to stop the transmission of the illness,” said the regional health minister, Sara Alba. The death toll from the virus in Spain currently stands at 10"
> 
> ...


It reminds me of the film R.E.C.


----------



## andysays (Mar 8, 2020)

danny la rouge said:


> I was in the big Tesco in Maryhill this morning. There were no shortages of anything.


...until you bought up the whole of their stock of Sambuca


----------



## magneze (Mar 8, 2020)

By April, only Altern-8 remain touring.


----------



## HAL9000 (Mar 8, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 200973



Apple's manufacturer is making masks, but its for the Chinese government  (for the moment  )









						Coronavirus: iPhone manufacturer Foxconn to make masks
					

The world's biggest electronics maker aims to produce two million surgical masks a month.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 8, 2020)

magneze said:


> By April, only Altern-8 remain touring.
> 
> View attachment 201026


----------



## MrSki (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 8, 2020)

Thread on panic buying on Twitter. Intersting that when even in shops where pasta shelves are empty that wholemeal pasta isnt that popular.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 8, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Thread on panic buying on Twitter. Intersting that when even in shops where pasta shelves are empty that wholemeal pasta isnt that popular.



Good. I buy wholemeal pasta.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 8, 2020)

Tinfoilers are at it again.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Good. I buy wholemeal pasta.


Hummous sold out in Hebden Bridge btw


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 8, 2020)

Sure, we'll be laughing on the other sides of our faces if we all end up dead though.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 8, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Hummous sold out in Hebden Bridge btw


Oh, I knit my own hummus.


----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 8, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Tinfoilers are at it again.



Then why are you posting up this pathetic mornonic right wing cunty shit for thick twats to soak up and share?



> Hmmm a virus being blown out of proportion right as every democratic candidate is offering free healthcare as their only chance to combat Trumps numbers in the economy?  Nothing to see here...


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 8, 2020)

editor said:


> Then why are you posting up this pathetic mornonic right wing cunty shit for thick twats to soak up and share?



Isn’t this thread meant to take the piss out of such?


----------



## editor (Mar 8, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Isn’t this thread meant to take the piss out of such?


Except you always post up right wing Youtube garbage like this.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 8, 2020)

editor said:


> Except you always post up right wing Youtube garbage like this.



What exactly are you inferring from my rather innocuous post in question?


----------



## editor (Mar 8, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> What exactly are you inferring from my rather innocuous post in question?


I'm not 'inferring' anything. I'm stating the obvious fact that you post up endless garbage right wing YouTube videos.  No more please. Thanks.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 8, 2020)

editor said:


> Then why are you posting up this pathetic mornonic right wing cunty shit for thick twats to soak up and share?


Look there may be a sizeable minority  on here who wouldnt get on University Challange but I wouldnt call them thick twats to be honest and if they share it they share it.Not a lot we can do tbh


----------



## ricbake (Mar 8, 2020)

Could I have a bad cold or flu? Or if I feel a bit ropey with a snotty nose, sore throat and head ache does it have to be corona virus? 
My wife keeps dosing me with detox and taking my temperature which hasn't got over 36.9 degrees... 
We have run out of paracetamol and could be about to run out of toilet paper. 
Joe has just won dancing on ice, I think I might just put myself out of this misery...

🤧🤮🤢☠


----------



## two sheds (Mar 8, 2020)

ricbake said:


> We have run out of paracetamol and could be about to run out of toilet paper.
> 
> 🤧🤮🤢☠



PM me I've got a couple of dozen rolls I could let you have.


----------



## ricbake (Mar 8, 2020)

two sheds said:


> PM me I've got a couple of dozen rolls I could let you have.


Will you deliver?  Atchooo...


----------



## editor (Mar 8, 2020)

ricbake said:


> Could I have a bad cold or flu? Or if I feel a bit ropey with a snotty nose, sore throat and head ache does it have to be corona virus?
> My wife keeps dosing me with detox and taking my temperature which hasn't got over 36.9 degrees...
> We have run out of paracetamol and could be about to run out of toilet paper.
> Joe has just won dancing on ice, I think I might just put myself out of this misery...
> ...


Check out this thread - Sensible information and advice about Coronavirus (COVID-19)


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 8, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Look there may be a sizeable minority  on here who wouldnt get on University Challange but I wouldnt call them thick twats to be honest and if they share it they share it.Not a lot we can do tbh



we can call them thick twats thats a start

oddly most people avoid linking to dodgy links on here as a matter of course


----------



## MrSki (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## Steel Icarus (Mar 8, 2020)

A few years ago when the town flooded the local Co-Op sold out of beer before bread. 

#priorities #thisisthenorth


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## bellaozzydog (Mar 9, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Look there may be a sizeable minority  on here who wouldnt get on University Challange but I wouldnt call them thick twats to be honest and if they share it they share it.Not a lot we can do tbh


Marty1 is urbans own virus


----------



## elbows (Mar 9, 2020)

MrSki said:


>




I'm pretty sure the UK already had a campaign with that sort of 'show the invisible spread' approach years ago. Cant remember if it was for swine flu. I will have a hunt around for it sometime.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 9, 2020)

Fanatstic news , this would not be possible if France had introduced a large gatherings ban


----------



## elbows (Mar 9, 2020)

elbows said:


> I'm pretty sure the UK already had a campaign with that sort of 'show the invisible spread' approach years ago. Cant remember if it was for swine flu. I will have a hunt around for it sometime.



This is one of the ones I was thinking of, cant remember if there were others.


----------



## elbows (Mar 9, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Fanatstic news , this would not be possible if France had introduced a large gatherings ban




I'm pretty sure there is a colloidal silver joke in there somewhere.


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 9, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Fanatstic news , this would not be possible if France had introduced a large gatherings ban




Would have been funnier if they'd sealed the exits and Smurfantined the lot of them for 14 days.


----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 9, 2020)

Hipster claiming to have COVID-18
					

A HIPSTER is claiming to have contracted the small-batch artisanal coronavirus strain COVID-18.




					www.thedailymash.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Mar 9, 2020)

twatter obvs...but


----------



## editor (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 9, 2020)

In 25 years time the 2020 Bog Roll Riots will be part of the History A-level syllabus. 

( nicked from twatter )


----------



## elbows (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## miss direct (Mar 9, 2020)

I've got no idea, but is there any chance that I (British citizen in Turkey, planning to move back to the UK within a few weeks, possibly) wouldn't be allowed in? Or out? Wondering if I ought to speed up my departure.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## weltweit (Mar 9, 2020)

I am remarkably dim, I was just shopping for short term supplies in a supermarket and I forgot to see if I could increase my limited supply of bog roll! 

Could I regret my omission?


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 9, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 201137


nicking that !!

my fb page is so much more entertaining thanks to this thread , thank you all for your input


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 9, 2020)

I hope that every event that I said I'm going to in London doesn't start sending me emails like this as it's going to get fucking tiresome.

Yeah, I sort of get their concern but there surely can't be many people left who aren't aware of what's going on and know the risks, and if anyone has been told to self-isolate but wants to ignore that, I doubt if this email will change their mind.



> Dear friends, supporters and colleagues,
> 
> We are very much looking forward to seeing you at *********. Obviously there are many concerns about the coronavirus and we thought we should write to let you know about the venue and what to expect, so that you can make informed decisions. As it stands the advice from the government is that we can continue with these kinds of events, so we think we should.
> 
> ...


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 9, 2020)




----------



## blameless77 (Mar 9, 2020)

Plenty of bog roll available if you’re good at bingo:


----------



## existentialist (Mar 9, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> View attachment 201150


I want to encourage this kind of mentality. It's what Darwin was for, after all...


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 9, 2020)

I was thinking one of the upsides of this would be the daily mail's comments section getting an awful lot quieter in a couple of months


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 9, 2020)

is it time for this to be re-released?


----------



## Smangus (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## Steel Icarus (Mar 10, 2020)

Loving this little app that lets you put whatever lyrics you like into your handwashing routine.


----------



## miss direct (Mar 10, 2020)

editor said:


> I hope that every event that I said I'm going to in London doesn't start sending me emails like this as it's going to get fucking tiresome.


I strongly believe that many event organisers are waiting for official government advice so they can cancel and claim on insurance.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 10, 2020)

France tells citizens cocaine cannot protect against coronavirus
					

A number of myths and conspiracy theories have emerged since outbreak began




					www.independent.co.uk


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Mar 10, 2020)

S☼I said:


> Loving this little app that lets you put whatever lyrics you like into your handwashing routine.
> 
> View attachment 201168


Doesn't include the guitar bit between 9 and 10


----------



## hegley (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 10, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I want to encourage this kind of mentality. It's what Darwin was for, after all...



The Greek Orthodox Church is refusing to shut down churches and says priests will not stop distributing holy communion, whilst one follower says, 'we have faith in God and everything is in His hands.'  



> Prime Minister Kyriakos Mitsotakis chaired a crisis meeting on Sunday to chart a strategy that would help contain the spread of the virus from Greece’s western-hit region to other parts of the country.
> 
> He also reached out to the head of the Greek Orthodox Church, which has refused to shut down churches and says priests will not stop distributing holy communion.
> 
> ...


----------



## elbows (Mar 10, 2020)

Anyone speak French want to do a full translation?


----------



## pesh (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2020)

pesh said:


>


That's the answer!  We all wear the cone of shame when out and about, with a clear plastic bit at the front so we can see and a bubble of clear plastic on the roof to let in daylight.  There might need to be a one way valve to let air in/out but it should be foolproof.


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 10, 2020)

elbows said:


> Anyone speak French want to do a full translation?



No, cocaine does NOT protect against # COVID19. It is an addictive drug causing serious adverse effects and harmful to people's health.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 10, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> No, cocaine does NOT protect against # COVID19. It is an addictive drug causing serious adverse effects and harmful to people's health.



I like the first comment which is (I think) - As opposed to heroin which works _really_ well.


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 10, 2020)

Cake is the best way to stave off captain trips


----------



## elbows (Mar 10, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> No, cocaine does NOT protect against # COVID19. It is an addictive drug causing serious adverse effects and harmful to people's health.



Cheers. Is this one about booze?


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 10, 2020)

elbows said:


> Cheers. Is this one about booze?



No, spraying alcohol or chlorine will not kill viruses (which have already entered your body).
Spraying these substances may be harmful to the mucous membranes and clothing.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> No, spraying alcohol or chlorine will not kill viruses (which have already entered your body).
> Spraying these substances may be harmful to the mucous membranes and clothing.


I'm ensuring a steady atmospheric concentration of chlorine at home by recklessly mixing bathroom cleaning products.  Better safe than sorry...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2020)

Wondering how easy it is to obtain fluorine - that has to be better.


----------



## elbows (Mar 10, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I'm ensuring a steady atmospheric concentration of chlorine at home by recklessly mixing bathroom cleaning products.  Better safe than sorry...



I'm sure I was reading an article on the Guardian website recently and it mentioned at the bottom that the article had been amended because a previous version suggested mixing things together that can result in a dangerous chemical reaction  Sadly I currently have no way to remember enough detail to find the article again.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2020)

elbows said:


> I'm sure I was reading an article on the Guardian website recently and it mentioned at the bottom that the article had been amended because a previous version suggested mixing things together that can result in a dangerous chemical reaction  Sadly I currently have no way to remember enough detail to find the article again.


'don't do this at home kids'  

I've only produced chlorine once - genuine mistake due to stupid memory, and instantly had to leg it out the bathroom, turn on the extractor fan.  I opened the windows in general just to be on the safe side but fucking hell it was pungent. Dread to think what it could do to lung tissue.


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 10, 2020)

> At least 44 people have died of methanol poisoning in Iran — mistakenly thinking that downing bootleg booze would ward off Covid-19, according to the state news agency.
> 
> 
> Despite alcohol being banned in most of the Islamic Republic, it is responsible for hundreds of patients being hospitalized because of fake rumors that it would save drinkers from the virus that has killed 291 and infected more than 8,000 there, the state news agency IRNA reported, according to Agence France-Presse (AFP).
> ...



Dozens of Iranians die from methanol poisoning in attempt to fight coronavirus


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## Celyn (Mar 10, 2020)

elbows said:


> I'm sure I was reading an article on the Guardian website recently and it mentioned at the bottom that the article had been amended because a previous version suggested mixing things together that can result in a dangerous chemical reaction  Sadly I currently have no way to remember enough detail to find the article again.





> This article was amended on 7 March 2020. An earlier version wrongly stated that “a solution of ethanol, hydrogen peroxide and bleach will disinfect surfaces”. It is dangerous to combine such substances. It now states correctly that “a solution of ethanol, a solution of hydrogen peroxide or a solution of bleach” will disinfect surfaces.



Coronavirus: nine reasons to be reassured


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 201238


Imagine having a bad hangover in rough seas.  Suspect death would be sweet release.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 10, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Imagine having a bad hangover in rough seas.  Suspect death would be sweet release.



Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 10, 2020)

Make your own. 





__





						Wash Your Lyrics
					

Create hand-washing infographics with your favourite lyrics




					washyourlyrics.com


----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 10, 2020)

Urban is doing a good job of fear mongering in its own community IMO. A third of threads on the new posts first page are from the conovavirus forum. I float between blocking the sub forum and unblocking to read whatever might be helpful or factual or a bit of fun but fuck me has this place got a fucking hardon for it. How many threads are needed? And why are there so many? I don't get it?


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 10, 2020)

NRA insists Coronavirus pandemic could be stopped in its tracks by one good guy with Ebola
					

COVID-19 can easily be stopped in its tracks by one good guy with a bigger, more powerful and deadly virus, according to the National Rifle Association this afternoon.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 10, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 10, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I'm ensuring a steady atmospheric concentration of chlorine at home by recklessly mixing bathroom cleaning products.  Better safe than sorry...


Let’s hope dessiato doesn't follow your suggestion, or we could be soon dealing with a serious incident at his household...


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 10, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> That's the answer!  We all wear the cone of shame when out and about, with a clear plastic bit at the front so we can see and a bubble of clear plastic on the roof to let in daylight.  There might need to be a one way valve to let air in/out but it should be foolproof.


Just get a Strutter Bubble


----------



## petee (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Mar 11, 2020)

Just posting this because I loved the image.


----------



## editor (Mar 11, 2020)

Ah, it's the CHINESE coronavirus









						Fox News host Tucker Carlson begins referring to 'Chinese coronavirus'
					

'China did this to the world and we should not pretend otherwise' Fox host tells viewers




					www.independent.co.uk


----------



## editor (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 11, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Interesting vlog by a Russian bloke in Hubei Province.



"What's Fake and Truth about Coronavirus ". Yeah, right. You'll get that from a Youtube vlogger in Russia.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 11, 2020)

That's interesting elbows - never seen inside a toilet roll factory.  We clearly just need one of those giant rolls each - would keep us going for ages.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 11, 2020)

editor said:


> "What's Fake and Truth about Coronavirus ". Yeah, right. You'll get that from a Youtube vlogger in Russia.



Ignore the title - give it a watch it’s very informative- nothing to do with tinfoil


----------



## Yuwipi Woman (Mar 11, 2020)

Some people are really freaking out.  I did a search of Amazon for long-term food storage--10-20 shelf life.  There's a brand called Auguson Farms.  Every single item they produce is out of stock and expected to be out of stock for a couple of months.  Amazon has also been delisting some price gougers and profiteers (they don't like the competition, I'm sure):



			Amazon Battles Counterfeit Masks, $400 Hand Sanitizer


----------



## editor (Mar 11, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Ignore the title - give it a watch it’s very informative- nothing to do with tinfoil


No thanks. There's plenty of more credible sources to choose from.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 11, 2020)

editor said:


> No thanks. There's plenty of more credible sources to choose from.



Suit yourself, but you’re missing out on a superb piece of citizen journalism.


----------



## Sweet FA (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## Numbers (Mar 11, 2020)

Finished my prep buying today.


----------



## bimble (Mar 11, 2020)

Someone at bf’s Waitrose hung this carefully chosen poster up in the empty loo roll isle


----------



## editor (Mar 11, 2020)

Seen this bollocks 'drink water' claim  so many times on my FB timeline. The facts: 








						Drinking water won’t prevent the coronavirus
					

CLAIM: Everyone should ensure that their mouth and throat is moist and never dry. Take sips of water every 15 minutes because even if the virus gets into your mouth by drinking water or liquids, it will wash the virus down through your esophagus and into your stomach where your stomach acid will...




					apnews.com


----------



## NoXion (Mar 11, 2020)

No idea how this double post happened, good grief.


----------



## NoXion (Mar 11, 2020)

I've not visited Facebook since this whole thing went viral. I dread to think of all the shit posts by loons and cunts that I'm missing out on.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 11, 2020)

.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 11, 2020)

Reports today state this is Grace Jones about to board a plane


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 11, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> That's interesting elbows - never seen inside a toilet roll factory.



I have, we had a school tour of one, fuck knows why.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 11, 2020)

I’m sort of pleased about this. It has to be karma.









						Secretary general of Spain’s far-right Vox party tests positive for coronavirus
					

Javier Ortega Smith was recently at an event that attracted 9,000 people in Madrid, where the number of Covid-19 cases has risen sharply




					english.elpais.com


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 11, 2020)

Sweet FA said:


> View attachment 201305


Is this one especially for the boring little cunt Marty1 ?


----------



## Voley (Mar 11, 2020)

Best one of these I've seen. The Cure lol.


----------



## Sweet FA (Mar 11, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Is this one especially for the boring little cunt Marty1 ?


Unintentional - urban synchronicity.


----------



## Indeliblelink (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## phillm (Mar 11, 2020)

/


----------



## phillm (Mar 11, 2020)

Dancing plague of 1518 - Wikipedia
					






					en.wikipedia.org


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 11, 2020)

phillm said:


> View attachment 201329/



watches joke fly over his head


----------



## Lazy Llama (Mar 11, 2020)

Didn’t know whether this should go here or in the profiteering scumbags thread


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 11, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I have, we had a school tour of one, fuck knows why.


Were you an unsanitary child so they tried to teach you a lesson in arse wiping?


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 11, 2020)

would rather link to the dailyfail that facebook tnh


has anyone got the video of the guy shotting  scented toilet paper


----------



## MrSki (Mar 11, 2020)

Lazy Llama said:


> Didn’t know whether this should go here or in the profiteering scumbags thread


----------



## BCBlues (Mar 11, 2020)

Best Xmas pressie ever


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 11, 2020)




----------



## cybershot (Mar 11, 2020)

FridgeMagnet said:


>




should sent them to northern Italy


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 12, 2020)

.View attachment 201499


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## rekil (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Boris Sprinkler (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 12, 2020)

Boris Sprinkler said:


> View attachment 201392


_We Need To Talk (COVID bigots) _incoming


----------



## 8ball (Mar 12, 2020)

phillm said:


> Dancing plague of 1518 - Wikipedia
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Early techno disaster which later led to the 1530 Techno Regulations Act, which stipulated all dancers to maintain a minimum of 3 metres distance from each other in order to reduce the risk of transmission.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 12, 2020)

I'm pleased and happy to repeat the news that we have, in fact, caught and killed a large predator that supposedly injured some bathers. But, as you see, it's a beautiful day, the beaches are open and people are having a wonderful time.


----------



## editor (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Steel Icarus (Mar 12, 2020)

editor said:


>



That's people buying mates it as a joke innit


----------



## editor (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 12, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 201406


Let's hope he gets it and dies.  Would do everyone a favour.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 12, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Let's hope he gets it and dies.  Would do everyone a favour.


The world or the UK would be a better place if that cunt had never survived the plane crash.


----------



## Sweet FA (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 12, 2020)

Sound on!


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 12, 2020)

we have a Coronavirus Response Action Plan meeting at work tomorrow...


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 12, 2020)

Too soon?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 12, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> Sound on!




Fucking twats.


----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 12, 2020)

I did one of those hand wash lyrics things. It made me chuckle ymmv


----------



## two sheds (Mar 12, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> we have a Coronavirus Response Action Plan meeting at work tomorrow...



They were apparently thinking of making a unitary health body to cover the Camborne Redruth And Pool area.


----------



## A380 (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## phillm (Mar 12, 2020)

Panic buying of coal has been reported...


----------



## existentialist (Mar 12, 2020)

Mumbles274 said:


> I did one of those hand wash lyrics things. It made me chuckle ymmv
> 
> View attachment 201450


I thought a bit of the Requiem Mass might be appropriate...


----------



## gosub (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 12, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 201449
> 
> Too soon?


Was just coming here to post something about that. He's been roaming around Sydney touching people. Tom Hanks! Potentially responsible for spreading the virus. Tom bloody Hanks!


----------



## existentialist (Mar 12, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I thought a bit of the Requiem Mass might be appropriate...
> 
> View attachment 201454


Scared the fuck out of the other hand washers - they all rushed off after 5 seconds!


----------



## T & P (Mar 12, 2020)

.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 12, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 201451


Fingerless gloves...


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 12, 2020)

The world has gone absolutely totally and utterly batshit fucking crazy


----------



## Yuwipi Woman (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 12, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 201451


Is that Likesfish?


----------



## editor (Mar 12, 2020)

Before anyone else reposts that page from a 1981 novel that "predicted the outbreak of the coronavirus,"  please read this first. Much obliged. 









						Was Coronavirus Predicted in a 1981 Dean Koontz Novel?
					

A speculative anticipation of a possibility is very different than a 'prediction.'




					www.snopes.com


----------



## prunus (Mar 12, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> The world has gone absolutely totally and utterly batshit fucking crazy
> View attachment 201463



Although that particular demographic section of the world has been batshit crazy for a long time now...


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 12, 2020)

prunus said:


> Although that particular demographic section of the world has been batshit crazy for a long time now...


You make a good point sir


----------



## editor (Mar 12, 2020)

phillm said:


> Panic buying of coal has been reported...



Dude nailed it at the end.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 12, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 13, 2020)

editor said:


> Before anyone else reposts that page from a 1981 novel that "predicted the outbreak of the coronavirus,"  please read this first. Much obliged.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


My boss - the head of our department and a seemingly intelligent woman - thinks there's something in this


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## Doctor Carrot (Mar 13, 2020)

Finally! I was desperately waiting to discover what steps they're taking to contain the outbreak. I'm sure you were too.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 13, 2020)

__





						Telegraph journalist says coronavirus ‘cull’ of elderly could benefit economy
					

In a Telegraph column, Jeremy Warner analyses the US making an emergency interest rate cut to protect the economy against coronavirus.



					metro.co.uk


----------



## cybershot (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## Maggot (Mar 13, 2020)

Nicked off Twitter:



> The World Health Organization has announced that dogs cannot contract Covid-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released. To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 13, 2020)

Australian Grand Prix in Melbourne has been cancelled but AFTER everyone had all ready congregated outside the stadium


----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 13, 2020)

Person in military haz-mat gear spotted with 27 rolls of Floralys
					

A picture is worth a thousand words...




					www.somersetlive.co.uk


----------



## Badgers (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## LDC (Mar 13, 2020)

neonwilderness said:


> Person in military haz-mat gear spotted with 27 rolls of Floralys
> 
> 
> A picture is worth a thousand words...
> ...



kebabking ?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## kebabking (Mar 13, 2020)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> kebabking ?



Its not me - I wear the gloves. Actually, I wear the gloves all the time....


----------



## bellaozzydog (Mar 13, 2020)

kebabking said:


> Its not me - I wear the gloves. Actually, I wear the gloves all the time....


3Romeo and blot bang rub coming to a high street near you soon


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 13, 2020)

Mumbles274 said:


> Urban is doing a good job of fear mongering in its own community IMO. A third of threads on the new posts first page are from the conovavirus forum. I float between blocking the sub forum and unblocking to read whatever might be helpful or factual or a bit of fun but fuck me has this place got a fucking hardon for it. How many threads are needed? And why are there so many? I don't get it?


They are increasing exponentially


----------



## hash tag (Mar 13, 2020)

I was in Bath yesterday and it wasn't me and nor did I see this


----------



## Badgers (Mar 13, 2020)

Mumbles274 said:


> Urban is doing a good job of fear mongering in its own community IMO. A third of threads on the new posts first page are from the conovavirus forum. I float between blocking the sub forum and unblocking to read whatever might be helpful or factual or a bit of fun but fuck me has this place got a fucking hardon for it. How many threads are needed? And why are there so many? I don't get it?


Everywhere is doing the same.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 13, 2020)

I don't understand the panic buying of toilet roll. Food and nappies perhaps, but toilet paper? 

Yesterday in the supermarket people were also buying very large quantities of bottled water. Why?


----------



## Badgers (Mar 13, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I don't understand the panic buying of toilet roll. Food and nappies perhaps, but toilet paper?
> 
> Yesterday in the supermarket people were also buying very large quantities of bottled water. Why?


I saw quite a few people buying torches too


----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 13, 2020)

Heard somebody sincerely float the idea this morning that isis did coronavirus. Tbf it was a fairly well developed conspiracy - started in china cos of treatment of uighurs


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 13, 2020)

I'm going to stock up on the internet , in case I have to self isolate


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 13, 2020)

.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 13, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I don't understand the panic buying of toilet roll. Food and nappies perhaps, but toilet paper?
> 
> Yesterday in the supermarket people were also buying very large quantities of bottled water. Why?


Speaking as someone who only the other day tried and failed to convince two co-workers of the advantages of (remarkably inexpensive) bidet toilet seats for this very reason, I think it goes very deep in the Northern European psyche.
Constipation and ineffective smearing....
I myself was once a profligate de-forester and toilet blocker....

I also enjoyed winding up an aloe vera pyramid seller on nextdoor.co.uk a few days back since my own use of the raw product was clearly unknown to her...


----------



## DexterTCN (Mar 13, 2020)

Badgers said:


> I saw quite a few people buying torches too


What...like the one everyone has on their phones?

I know this has probably been posted someplace (corona threads spread nearly as quickly as the virus) but Hunt looks like he's hiding something and is terrified.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 13, 2020)

Mumbles274 said:


> Urban is doing a good job of fear mongering in its own community IMO. A third of threads on the new posts first page are from the conovavirus forum. I float between blocking the sub forum and unblocking to read whatever might be helpful or factual or a bit of fun but fuck me has this place got a fucking hardon for it. How many threads are needed? And why are there so many? I don't get it?


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 13, 2020)

just got my sainsbos delivery. instead of offering to bring it through like they usually do the dude built a massive wall of crates at the front door and stayed firmly on the far side of it


----------



## ska invita (Mar 13, 2020)

cybershot said:


>


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## cybershot (Mar 13, 2020)

Official supermarket restrictions now in place:

Tesco:
1 x 4pack toilet rolls
500g rice
500g pasta
2 hand sanitiser

Asda:
1 x 4pack toilet rolls
4 tins of beans
500g rice
1kg pasta
1 hand sanitiser

Aldi:
1 MIG welder
2 trumpets
1 spare wheelbarrow wheel


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 13, 2020)

Logging into Amazon app this morning...



😳


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 13, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Logging into Amazon app this morning...
> 
> 
> 
> 😳


An unfortunate absence of punctuation ....


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 13, 2020)

Huge relief as man coughing in public revealed to be choking
					

A coughing man caused panic today before people in the area realised he was merely choking to death.




					newsthump.com


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 13, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> An unfortunate absence of punctuation ....



Too much punctuation if anything. Un-well?


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 13, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Too much punctuation if anything. Un-well?


double-plus-well spotted


----------



## killer b (Mar 13, 2020)

this is an interesting contrast.


----------



## JimW (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 13, 2020)

Jacob Rees-Mogg demonstrates up to date plague-resistant clothing
					

After several MPs were diagnosed with Coronavirus, Jacob Rees-Mogg has arrived to work wearing the very latest in outfits deemed impervious to pestilence.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Barking_Mad (Mar 13, 2020)

My wife has had a cough for over a week along with the little one. It's got slightly worse, but not significantly so. He she has asthma and has previously had steroids and antibiotics when she gets one. She decided to ring the surgery and told them it was an *existing cough*, no other symptoms. Surgery said to phone 111, so she did. They said "self isolate and phone your GP". She rang the GP back and asked for a phone appointment - which she's got and is waiting for the GP to call back.

Not exactly instilling confidence..........

Edit: changed it to make clear she has had steroids/antibiotics for coughs before, but not for this current cough


----------



## Edie (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 13, 2020)

editor said:


>




That's only 18 seconds. 2 short!


----------



## Barking_Mad (Mar 13, 2020)

Barking_Mad said:


> My wife has had a cough for over a week along with the little one. It's got slightly worse, but not significantly so. He she has asthma and has previously had steroids and antibiotics when she gets one. She decided to ring the surgery and told them it was an *existing cough*, no other symptoms. Surgery said to phone 111, so she did. They said "self isolate and phone your GP". She rang the GP back and asked for a phone appointment - which she's got and is waiting for the GP to call back.
> 
> Not exactly instilling confidence..........
> 
> Edit: changed it to make clear she has had steroids/antibiotics for coughs before, but not for this current cough



Update: surgery rang back and said they won't treat her and she should call back 111. She's called twice and been cut off twice after holding for 10 minutes each time. 

111 have just sent a referral to the GP surgery for her to be seen.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 13, 2020)

Not surprisingly, the other day I was musing on the "Staying Alive" CPR thing


----------



## MrSki (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## hash tag (Mar 13, 2020)

Why the NHS is broken....


Barking_Mad said:


> Update: surgery rang back and said they won't treat her and she should call back 111. She's called twice and been cut off twice after holding for 10 minutes each time.
> 
> 111 have just sent a referral to the GP surgery for her to be seen.


----------



## Barking_Mad (Mar 13, 2020)

Barking_Mad said:


> Update: surgery rang back and said they won't treat her and she should call back 111. She's called twice and been cut off twice after holding for 10 minutes each time.
> 
> 111 have just sent a referral to the GP surgery for her to be seen.



Oh, and the second 111 operator apologised and said her colleague should not have told her to self isolate as it was an existing cough, not a new one.

Queue for 111 was 50 people BTW. 

Waiting for the nursing practitioner to get back from a home visit so an appointment can be made for today.


----------



## T & P (Mar 13, 2020)

editor said:


> Before anyone else reposts that page from a 1981 novel that "predicted the outbreak of the coronavirus,"  please read this first. Much obliged.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




I’ve just been sent this similar story about a book first published in 2008. Apologies if it’s been posted already




Apparently it’ll disappear as suddenly as it appeared, so all is well folks


----------



## Barking_Mad (Mar 13, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Why the NHS is broken....



Thing is our local surgery is excellent, I mean I've not a bad word to say about it. I can get an appointment at the drop of a hat either online or by calling up when they open (that's a bit of a redial competition). So I was really confused when she told them it was existing, but they insisted that she call 111. Twice. 

Cut off on 111 three times, once after waiting nearly 15 mins. 40 mins in total.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 13, 2020)

editor said:


> Before anyone else reposts that page from a 1981 novel that "predicted the outbreak of the coronavirus,"  please read this first. Much obliged.
> 
> 
> 
> ...






T & P said:


> I’ve just been sent this similar story about a book first published in 2008. Apologies if it’s been posted already
> 
> 
> View attachment 201536
> ...



Now go and sit on the naughty step.


----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 13, 2020)

DexterTCN said:


> What...like the one everyone has on their phones?
> 
> I know this has probably been posted someplace (corona threads spread nearly as quickly as the virus) but Hunt looks like he's hiding something and is terrified.




He desperately needs a poo I reckon, watch it again but with that idea in your head


----------



## petee (Mar 13, 2020)

so that you limeys get a taste, this is what you'd hear in the states, a dozen times a day. they're all reading from the same script, the idea being to open a firehose of politicization to keep the momentum on their side. they'll never waver and we'll see in a month or two if trump succeeds in making himself the victim yet again.


----------



## editor (Mar 13, 2020)

petee said:


> so that you limeys get a taste, this is what you'd hear in the states, a dozen times a day. they're all reading from the same script, the idea being to open a firehose of politicization to keep the momentum on their side. they'll never waver and we'll see in a month or two if trump succeeds in making himself the victim yet again.



Cunts. Stupid, selfish, ignorant cunts.


----------



## Barking_Mad (Mar 13, 2020)

Barking_Mad said:


> Thing is our local surgery is excellent, I mean I've not a bad word to say about it. I can get an appointment at the drop of a hat either online or by calling up when they open (that's a bit of a redial competition). So I was really confused when she told them it was existing, but they insisted that she call 111. Twice.
> 
> Cut off on 111 three times, once after waiting nearly 15 mins. 40 mins in total.



Apparently the guidelines have _just_ been changed. We're having a home visit from the GP who just told my wife this on the phone.


----------



## editor (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 13, 2020)

Gangs of feral monkeys invade Thai city left deserted by humans in coronavirus panic
					

Just when it seemed like the world couldn’t resemble the opening scenes of an apocalyptic horror film any more, it appears the coronavirus has sparked gang warfare between monkeys on the streets of Thailand.




					www.indy100.com


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 13, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> Gangs of feral monkeys invade Thai city left deserted by humans in coronavirus panic
> 
> 
> Just when it seemed like the world couldn’t resemble the opening scenes of an apocalyptic horror film any more, it appears the coronavirus has sparked gang warfare between monkeys on the streets of Thailand.
> ...



Fucking hell!


----------



## Barking_Mad (Mar 13, 2020)

Barking_Mad said:


> Apparently the guidelines have _just_ been changed. We're having a home visit from the GP who just told my wife this on the phone.



Oh my days.

So the GP turned up at the house, fully decked up in a mask, apron and gloves. Two school kids walking past were agog.

He laughed when he got to the door and apologised for looking ridiculous, said it was the first time he'd been asked to do this.

After examining wifey she now has antibiotics and steroids on the way. He acknowledged that 111 and GP surgery are at odds on the process with both referring each other to the other.

He's such an amazing doctor and full credit to him, the surgery and 111 for getting their shit together (eventually) and coming to see us in the space of 3 hours. Sorry to all the people in the surgery who've had to wait whilst he took time out

My advice is that anyone with an existing cough that they are worried about condition should get it seen to sooner rather than later.

I'm a bit emotional now.


----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 13, 2020)

t


----------



## blairsh (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 13, 2020)

Will coronavirus make all of us go flight-free? #20pledges
					

This could break aviation industry as we know it




					www.independent.co.uk
				




upside of this is , just as I’m looking for a new job , I could well be made redundant and possibly get a payout , funny old life


----------



## William of Walworth (Mar 13, 2020)

Plenty of panic at my workplace this week.

Example : One mother is now convinced that all the Swansea schools, and possibly all Welsh schools, will close for two weeks leading up to Easter (followed by a  third further week closed obvs, in the week following Easter Monday).

Source?
"One of the teachers" told "her friend's mother" -- and at a different school .... 

A genuine possibility is that more staff where we work (5,000 employees) *may* have it arranged for them to work at home ...... let me have a new and phat-quality 'work'  laptop and I'd be WELL up for that!  
No certainty yet on that one but we'll see  ....  it is a Government (Civil Service) department after all ....


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 13, 2020)

Does Trending ‘Boomer Remover’ Violate Twitter Hateful Conduct Policy?
					

‘Boomer Remover’ was trending on Twitter with over 71.1k tweets, and it just may make you want to quarantine yourself from the internet for a while. The phrase “Boomer Remover” was one of the top trends on the trending list on Twitter on March 13. The phrase is focused on young Americans...




					www.newsbusters.org


----------



## A380 (Mar 13, 2020)

[


----------



## Badgers (Mar 13, 2020)

William of Walworth said:


> A genuine possibility is that more staff where we work (5,000 employees) *may* have it arranged for them to work at home ...... let me have a new and phat-quality 'work' laptop and I'd be WELL up for that!
> No certainty yet on that one but we'll see .... it is a Government (Civil Service) department after all


But Glasto with 200k + is still good?


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## little_legs (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 13, 2020)

Daily fail in full effect there, I had a _bit_ of a  moment.

ETA, that's real headlines, the results I got when I looked at the news on Google.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## eatmorecheese (Mar 13, 2020)

Pretty much this for me


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 13, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 201596[


*invests in sock manufacturing company stocks”


----------



## T & P (Mar 13, 2020)

One for football fans...

“Quadruple” 
- Villa 5-0 Liverpool 

“Unbeaten” 
- Watford 3-0 Liverpool 

“Treble”
- Chelsea 2-0 Liverpool

“Double”
- Atletico 4-2 Liverpool 

“League Title”
- Covid 19-18 Liverpool


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 13, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 201615


Page 12...


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 13, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 14, 2020)

little_legs said:


>



The person posting that doesn't know what they're on about - that's the Rochdale Canal in central Manchester.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

Apparently the 'yoot' have nicknamed COVID-19 the 'Boomer Remover'


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

I might watch that today. Feels apt.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> I might watch that today. Feels apt.


I am watching Twelve Monkeys later


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

Badgers said:


> I am watching Twelve Monkeys later


Good call!


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

> Jacob Rees-Mogg now advising that you should maintain some distance from your family members if you have any symptoms yourself: perhaps consider taking supper in the scullery for a few days, or retiring to the billiards room rather than joining everyone else in the east wing drawing room.


----------



## danski (Mar 14, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 201640


So, I looked up ‘The three seashells’ as I had no clue. 
Who’d have thought there’d be people explaining stuff about sci-fi films with clearly far too much time on their hands?



> The Three Seashells
> 
> I'd like to take a moment to talk about The Three Seashells.
> 
> ...


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

Could be worse. 
Death by 'Cancer *and* Wolf' 



_Nicked from Adrian Edmondson on Twitter_


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

Whatever is the "rising of the lights"?


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

470 died of "teeth"


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> 470 died of "teeth"


Probably abscesses.


----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 14, 2020)

patronising smugness and stupidity


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 14, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 201648


This works best on the up escalator, you end up on your knees on the downside. Just saying.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

There is a thread already... Causes of death recorded in London 1632 - incl wolf, suddenly and rising of the lights


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> There is a thread already... Causes of death recorded in London 1632 - incl wolf, suddenly and rising of the lights


I did not expect that


----------



## a_chap (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Whatever is the "rising of the lights"?



Most likely liver failure, given that "lights" (meaning heart, lungs, offal, etc) are ingredients in traditional dishes such as haslet.




Mrs Miggins said:


> 470 died of "teeth"



"Teeth" means the death of an infant whilst teething.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

a_chap said:


> Most likely liver failure, given that "lights" (meaning heart, lungs, offal, etc) are ingredients in traditional dishes such as haslet.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


No on both counts. See thread link above!


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

Whatever next 

_"The covid-19 virus is a demonic attempt to kill elderly Americans who won't accept the Mark of the Beast so socialism can take over this nation"_










						Pastor Claims Coronavirus Is Satanic Plot To Bring Socialism To The U.S.
					

The Devil Is A Socialist: Pastor Perry Stone, a prominent conservative Christian preacher, claims that coronavirus is a Satanic attempt to kill older Christians so socialism can take over in the U.S.




					www.patheos.com


----------



## a_chap (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> No on both counts. See thread link above!



I counter with this link:



			Old Disease Names By Sylvain Cazalet
		


Let's see which random internet page is right.


----------



## brogdale (Mar 14, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> patronising smugness and stupidityView attachment 201651


Rainwater, but no mention of the rats?


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

a_chap said:


> I counter with this link:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I dunno though...lights are most definitely lungs and "teeth" more than likely refers to nasty tooth infections, not just babies.





						Glossary of Old Medical Terms
					

A Glossary of Medical Terms used in the 18th and 19th centuries, annotated with comments from Dr. Johnson's Dictionary



					www.thornber.net


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 14, 2020)

How the hell do you die of "sciatica" ?

I'm disappointed no one there died of *"*Scrivener's Palsy - or Writer's cramp."


----------



## keybored (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> 470 died of "teeth"


Just a lazy way of saying death by shark attack.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> How the hell do you die of "sciatica" ?


I dunno but by far the greatest number of deaths being infant mortality is quite sobering.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 14, 2020)

keybored said:


> Just a lazy way of saying death by shark attack.


I imagine there were sturgeon in the Thames back then, so why not sharks ?


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> I dunno but by far the greatest number of deaths being infant mortality is quite sobering.


Have you seen Christopher Hitchens' questioning of the uselessness of the biblical god ?


----------



## keybored (Mar 14, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> patronising smugness and stupidityView attachment 201651




"Not much fun at parties"


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Have you seen Christopher Hitchens' questioning of the uselessness of the biblical god ?


No....will have a look though.

Makes me angry all over again about the anti-vax morons.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 14, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> How the hell do you die of "sciatica" ?
> 
> I'm disappointed no one there died of *"*Scrivener's Palsy - or Writer's cramp."


Not sure, but could be more serious lower back problems involving the spine that might have been lumped together if the pain was similar in distribution. They didn't have MRI scanners back then so diagnosis was probably a bit sketchy.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> No....will have a look though.
> 
> Makes me angry all over again about the anti-vax morons.


https://www. youtube.com/watch?v=BD_WptjCMPI


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Not sure, but could be more serious lower back problems involving the spine that might have been lumped together if the pain was similar in distribution. They didn't have MRI scanners back then so diagnosis was probably a bit sketchy.


I imagine having severe, chronic pain with no access to any kind of painkiller might grind you down a bit as well.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 14, 2020)

If you were better-off and got to see a "doctor", doubtless that would account for a hefty number - albeit they would presumably have euphemisms for that ...


----------



## Cid (Mar 14, 2020)

__





						Wash Your Lyrics
					

Create hand-washing infographics with your favourite lyrics




					washyourlyrics.com
				




Skip James - Sickbed blues


----------



## Cid (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 14, 2020)

Cid said:


> __
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Then afterwards...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Idris2002 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## hash tag (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs T has just returned from a large local supermarket. She said it was packed and had an aggressive, threatening, unpleasant atmosphere never experienced before.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

https://onezero.medium.com/coronavirus-is-a-preview-of-our-self-isolating-future-f5e73b046104?source=social---tw.onezero


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

Taking a fallow day today after a trying week. 

Am trying to decide whether to use the next few weeks to get healthy, spring clean and do my feet. OR just go feral and unwashed. 

Both good outcomes imo


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

March 14th steak and blowjob day has been downgraded to a sandwich and a wave from the far side of the room.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 14, 2020)

Decent conspiracy theory here:









						COVID-19: Further Evidence That the Virus Originated in the US - LewRockwell
					

As readers will recall from the earlier article , Japanese and Taiwanese epidemiologists and pharmacologists have determined that the new coronavirus almost certainly originated in the US since that country is the only one known to have all five types – from which all others must have descended...




					www.lewrockwell.com


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> I imagine having severe, chronic pain with no access to any kind of painkiller might grind you down a bit as well.


I would imagine that if you couldn’t work, you wouldn’t eat. No welfare state in those days.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 14, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> Decent conspiracy theory here:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Quite interesting and well argued, even though it may be complete bollocks.


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 14, 2020)

‘Lights’ are lungs. We had an area set aside in the butchers shop where he processed pet mince. The noise lambs lungs make going through a mincing machine is perhaps the most disgusting and sickening sound I ever heard.


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 14, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Quite interesting and well argued, even though it may be complete bollocks.


99.99% it's complete bollocks! But yep, plausible in a film-story scenario etc.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 14, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> 99.99% it's complete bollocks! But yep, plausible in a film-story scenario etc.


Yeah, there are bound to be films made about this over the next few years I guess.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Taking a fallow day today after a trying week.
> 
> Am trying to decide whether to use the next few weeks to get healthy, spring clean and do my feet. OR just go feral and unwashed.
> 
> Both good outcomes imo


Feral and unwashed.
As nature intended.


----------



## skyscraper101 (Mar 14, 2020)

Cry me a 60% ethanol river.









						He Has 17,700 Bottles of Hand Sanitizer and Nowhere to Sell Them (Published 2020)
					

Amazon cracked down on coronavirus price gouging. Now, while the rest of the world searches, some sellers are holding stockpiles of sanitizer and masks.




					www.nytimes.com


----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 14, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Am trying to decide whether to use the next few weeks to get healthy, spring clean and do my feet. OR just go feral and unwashed.


Carrying on as normal then?


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

neonwilderness said:


> Carrying on as normal then?


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 14, 2020)

Erykah Badu


----------



## A380 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Mar 14, 2020)

Jesus, even the tame state mouthpieces ("journalists") appear to have rumbled why they want us to die in our homes.





Spanish flu - Wikipedia


----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)

Good to see big companies stepping up and helping people 'self isolate' at this difficult time. 









						Pornhub Is Giving Italians Free Premium Access During Coronavirus Quarantine
					

As Italy closes down non-essential businesses, Pornhub will allow Italian users to access premium content without having to put in their credit card information.




					www.pcmag.com


----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## cybershot (Mar 14, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Good to see big companies stepping up and helping people 'self isolate' at this difficult time.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



sets vpn endpoint to Italy.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 14, 2020)

Gotta love those people putting themselves at much more risk by all packing together in long queues for hand sanitisers!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 14, 2020)

Is Elon Musk the biggest nobhead on the planet these days?









						Elon Musk Makes Waves Online as He Says Coronavirus Outside of 'Top 100 Health Risks in US'
					

Addressing concerns over the growing coronavirus outbreak on Friday, President Donald Trump declared a national emergency in the US, where the death toll from the disease currently stands at at least 41.




					sputniknews.com


----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## cybershot (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## prunus (Mar 14, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> I dunno but by far the greatest number of deaths being infant mortality is quite sobering.



Our picture of the expectancy of staying alive is miles divorced from almost all of human experience. For instance in the Roman Empire at the height of its sophistication about 30% of babies would die before the age of 1, and fewer than 50% would make it past the age of 5.

I do find this slightly comforting in the present predicament (not logical I know - but I’m human and hence not logical), that this is just what life is like, and we’ve been lulled by an abnormally quiescent century or so.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 14, 2020)

Anti-vaxxers devastated there is no coronavirus vaccine they can refuse to take
					

Prominent anti-vaxxer Jenny McCarthy lashed out at authorities for being too slow to develop a coronavirus vaccine that she can then refuse to take and instead promote an essential oil / crystal re…




					eveningharold.com


----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 14, 2020)

Heart Radio just taking the piss now


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 14, 2020)

KFC suspends iconic ‘finger-lickin’ good’ campaign amid coronavirus fears
					

Ever eat fried chicken with a fork and knife?




					nypost.com


----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Lord Camomile (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 14, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 201747



Apart from the people that die tho


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 14, 2020)

Italian tenor sings to his city:



Longer version on FB



(it never fails to amaze me how powerful a trained opera singers voice can be)


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> Apart from the people that die tho


I don't understand why the boring little cunt is still here. Almost doubled death rate in one day & he jokes about it. These are people's friends & relatives who have died but I was surprised that his right wing trolling lasted more than a week. Maybe it will take the death of a Amazon driver to make him realise it is real.


----------



## little_legs (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 14, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 14, 2020)

little_legs said:


>



He's quality


----------



## Almor (Mar 14, 2020)

Cid said:


> __
> 
> 
> 
> ...


----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 14, 2020)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Italian tenor sings to his city:
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Goosebumps


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 14, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> Goosebumps



Same.

He does somewhat deafen his boy at the end though!


----------



## a_chap (Mar 15, 2020)

On the BBC News web site, the top ten most-read stories are*...*



*...*all about Coronavirus


----------



## hegley (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 15, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



The British government so perfectly emulating the WW1 generals it seems.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 15, 2020)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> (it never fails to amaze me how powerful a trained opera singers voice can be)


I went to a concert at the cathedral here which had three opera singers and I was sat about six feet away from them - it's astonishing how powerfully they can sing.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 15, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I went to a concert at the cathedral here which had three opera singers and I was sat about six feet away from them - it's astonishing how powerfully they can sing.


My father's family were all trained musicians and some were singers. When they wanted they could fill theatres with the power of their voices. It's amazing to be in an auditorium holding 500 people and hear them fill it with their singing.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Almost doubled death rate in one day & he jokes about it.


tbf this is specifically the thread for that...


----------



## MrSki (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 15, 2020)

wayward bob said:


> tbf this is specifically the thread for that...


True. I am just sick of him. He is the first poster I have ever put on ignore.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2020)

social distancing ftw


----------



## pesh (Mar 15, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 201747


didn't you just take 2 weeks off for a head cold?


----------



## existentialist (Mar 15, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 201751


More like this from you, please  Not that other stuff.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 15, 2020)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Italian tenor sings to his city:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



His top A flat is a bit, er, flat.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Mar 15, 2020)

U


Marty1 said:


> View attachment 201752



It's taken me decades to be able to poop outside of a safe home environment and you've just set that back.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 15, 2020)

pesh said:


> didn't you just take 2 weeks off for a head cold?





Yes, my gf had it too.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 15, 2020)

My schoolfriend's dad was a high-up in the council and they used to have IZAL Medicated as an (unused) alternative in the loo.
I'm guessing it was a family joke rather than pilfering.

The trick is to scrunch and spit on it, but it's still horrible.
Never mind *pooing* away from home, I dislike public facilities so much, when I was younger I managed to go most of the day without *peeing* ..


----------



## donkyboy (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 15, 2020)

This seems counterintuitive.









						If you’re not sick, now’s the time to reconnect with nature — Metro
					

You don't have to stay indoors just because things are on lock-down




					apple.news


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)

I drove pass our the big Tesco at 10.30, that's when the doors open & before the tills do at 11, the car-park looked totally full, traffic was back-up along the access road & half a mile down the public road, I've never seen that before, it's worst than I've seen on the approach of Christmas, fucking nuts. 

So, the government & supermarket's message of 'don't panic' seems to be causing even more panic.


----------



## A380 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 15, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>



She's fucking brilliant.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 15, 2020)

Someone posted this elsewhere, and Online OCR failed to help me translate the Finnish accurately and "get" the joke ...
(he seems to be getting it wrong - like the weirdos on here who only need one square and wipe from the front without getting up from the seat ...)


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 201792


----------



## gosub (Mar 15, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 201752




Demand for that stuff died with the advent of copy and paste


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

Good to see some people are doing well 



No link because Mirror


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 15, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Good to see some people are doing well
> 
> View attachment 201800
> 
> No link because Mirror


They should just requisition them with no payment.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 15, 2020)

Someone taking sensible precautions on a tram


----------



## Lord Camomile (Mar 15, 2020)

Badgers said:


> No link because Mirror


What's the issue with linking to The Mirror? Morgan afterglow?


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

Lord Camomile said:


> What's the issue with linking to The Mirror? Morgan afterglow?


I just dislike the media. 
Not hard to find the link if you need to.


----------



## platinumsage (Mar 15, 2020)

I can't post links but there's outrage in Australia as Tom Hanks, quarantined but with Instagram, puts way too much Vegemite on his toast.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Good to see some people are doing well
> 
> View attachment 201800
> 
> No link because Mirror



That's £300 per bed per day, on a par with the cost of NHS beds, you still need to pay for doctors, nurses, and all the other staff, drugs & other associated costs out of that daily cost.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> That's £300 per bed per day, on a par with the cost of NHS beds, you still need to pay for doctors, nurses, and all the other staff, drugs & other associated costs out of that daily cost.


It's all fine then


----------



## Lord Camomile (Mar 15, 2020)

Badgers said:


> I just dislike the media.
> Not hard to find the link if you need to.


Oh, I'd already read it, just wondered if there was a specific reason for not linking to the Mirror, ala the Mail or Sun.


----------



## hash tag (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## little_legs (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 15, 2020)

I KNEW it!

It's bloody Corbyn's fault!


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 15, 2020)

my mate in donegal has just messaged me saying all pubs are closing tonight, that's serious business..!


----------



## belboid (Mar 15, 2020)

I've just read it's all nonsense and is, in fact,  






			
				smoe knob said:
			
		

> JUST A COVER UP FOR THE NEW 5G TURN ON WHICH IS BIOLOGICALLY CHANGING YOUR OXYGEN LEVELS AND THE WAY YOUR BODY FUNCTIONS WITH THIS 60GHZ THERE PROJECTING OUT AS PURE RADIATION FOR THE CULL THAT IS CURRENTLY HAPPENING ALL AROUND THE WORLD !!!



So that's alright then.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> my mate in donegal has just messaged me saying all pubs are closing tonight, that's serious business..!


 

First they came for the drunks...


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Yuwipi Woman (Mar 15, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> The world has gone absolutely totally and utterly batshit fucking crazy
> View attachment 201463




To be fair, it wasn't that far of a trip.


----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

FFS


----------



## A380 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Apathy (Mar 15, 2020)

Made me remember this sketch from back in the 90s


----------



## Maggot (Mar 15, 2020)

Another oldie here:


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)

Oh Christ, another ship of doom.  



> A cruise ship carrying at least 600 Brits remains stranded off the coast of the Bahamas as the number of people on board showing flu-like symptoms increases. There are now 20 guests and 20 crew members, including a doctor, in isolation with five confirmed cases of *COVID-19* on the Braemar.
> 
> The ship - run by British firm Fred Olsen Cruise Lines - has been denied permission to dock and allow passengers to disembark at Freeport in the Bahamas. It has anchored at an island to allow a restock of food, fuel and medication for those on board.
> 
> ...











						Coronavirus: Uncertainty for 600 Britons stranded on board COVID-19 infected cruise ship
					

It is understood the firm is now considering travelling across the Atlantic to Southampton, which could take up to 10 days.




					news.sky.com


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

Bad times in the Netherlands 









						Netherlands Closes Sex Shops, Cannabis Cafes Due To Coronavirus; Bike Shops Stay Open
					

The Netherlands is to tackle the spread of coronavirus by closing all schools, sex shops and cannabis cafes, but bike shops will remain open.




					www.forbes.com


----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 15, 2020)

Another sketch that came to mind this morning.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

Some good news from the US


----------



## cybershot (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Voley (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Voley (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 15, 2020)

dessiato said:


> My father's family were all trained musicians and some were singers. When they wanted they could fill theatres with the power of their voices. It's amazing to be in an auditorium holding 500 people and hear them fill it with their singing.


My sister and brother in law are semi pro singers, opera and choral, and it's kind of embarrassing to be in any sort of church service with them - if a hymn comes along they are literally louder than everyone else there combined. I'm _quite_ loud (we both sang in the same choirs when we were kids) but nowhere near professional level.


----------



## Voley (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Voley (Mar 15, 2020)

I like how they've picked a photo of him looking particularly fucking gormless.


----------



## brogdale (Mar 15, 2020)

Has this been done yet?


----------



## a_chap (Mar 15, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> View attachment 201835



Goodness. Compare that to an actual picture of one of my hands once...


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## moochedit (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 15, 2020)

🇺🇸


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

Oof 









						Chilling Italian obituary pages show the rising dead from coronavirus
					

The Italian daily newspaper L'Eco di Bergamo had a page and a half of obituaries in early February. Because of coronavirus, the obituaries have expanded.




					mashable.com


----------



## MrSki (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 201847



Second from last post, on page 21.



Badgers said:


> FFS



Yep, you've done it again, now go and sit on the naughty step.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 15, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




3 posts above.   











Only joking.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Mar 15, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> This seems counterintuitive.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Natures a big place.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Mar 15, 2020)

Big Bertha said:


> View attachment 201859


T&c apply.
Does not apply to zhc or ‘self-employed’.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 15, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

So was the Ronaldo 'hotel' story a fake?


----------



## belboid (Mar 15, 2020)

Badgers said:


> So was the Ronaldo 'hotel' story a fake?


Well, the sun says so, so I won’t link, even though I do actually believe them in this case


----------



## Badgers (Mar 15, 2020)

belboid said:


> Well, the sun says so, so I won’t link, even though I do actually believe them in this case


I did not see a S*n article myself. Just a lot of people saying it was a lie.


----------



## belboid (Mar 16, 2020)

That and just everything about it.


----------



## petee (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Numbers (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 16, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


This is one of the saddest things I’ve seen, especially in light of what the UK government thinks wrt this “beneficial crisis.”


----------



## Numbers (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Steel Icarus (Mar 16, 2020)

What a time to be alive. Praying for global warming to save us from a pandemic.


----------



## Buddy Bradley (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 16, 2020)

First waking thought this morning was cheering. 

COVID-19 might kill some people. ION Climate change is destroying the planet.

Might go back to sleep.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)

Have we had this nutter yet?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## extra dry (Mar 16, 2020)

I wonder which would win?


----------



## JimW (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## JimW (Mar 16, 2020)

DP


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## strung out (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 16, 2020)

Arnie having a normal one


----------



## MrSki (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## bellaozzydog (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Mar 16, 2020)

Eldest said he thought he was getting a few looks at the shops this morning...got home and saw in the mirror he'd put on his St Vincent merch tee.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 16, 2020)

Spoiler


----------



## T & P (Mar 16, 2020)

It is rank but at the end of the day a good cleaning just before the image was taken would make that toilet seat 100% germ-free. Well, 99.99% anyway.

I'd like to see a live video of her approaching a busy Tube station escalator and licking the handrail though- now that's a challenge.


----------



## petee (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 16, 2020)

Might not be fully suitable for work. Deffo if you work in a bank.



Spoiler


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 16, 2020)

T & P said:


> It is rank but at the end of the day a good cleaning just before the image was taken would make that toilet seat 100% germ-free. Well, 99.99% anyway.
> 
> I'd like to see a live video of her approaching a busy Tube station escalator and licking the handrail though- now that's a challenge.



Yeah, but isn’t it amazing what some people will do to get attention?

How proud her friends and family must be to see her licking a toilet seat


----------



## A380 (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## bellaozzydog (Mar 16, 2020)

I thought I had a temperature brewing but looking in the mirror I’m slightly singed after an hour walking around deck in the sun


paranoid, moi?


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 16, 2020)

Fez909 said:


>




no "G"
/fail


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 16, 2020)

petee said:


> no "G"
> /fail


----------



## T & P (Mar 16, 2020)

I am sure Daily Telegraph subscribers are more than happy to have pay to access such groundbreaking opinion pieces such as these...


----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 16, 2020)

#takingbackcontrol


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)

Badgers said:


> #takingbackcontrol




Fucking idiots.


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)

FFS how many bloody times is that ^^^ going to get posted.


----------



## quimcunx (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Mar 16, 2020)

neonwilderness said:


> View attachment 201959


ha, I just had...


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 16, 2020)

Thankfully there isn't much need for handshaking at work these days, so I haven't had a chance to expose my nerd credentials ...


----------



## belboid (Mar 16, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Thankfully there isn't much need for handshaking at work these days, so I haven't had a chance to expose my nerd credentials ...
> 
> View attachment 201962


this is discriminatory against those of us who can't do it


----------



## MrSki (Mar 16, 2020)

Maybe no so apt after today.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 16, 2020)

Badgers said:


> #takingbackcontrol



Arrest them, put them in jail for two weeks quarantine. They are such dickheads.


----------



## hegley (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## little_legs (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 16, 2020)

That's been me recently - I've had bronchitis for 3 weeks ...
It reminded me of the time swine flu was on and I had a hay fever attack as I was cycling past a family in the park


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 16, 2020)

Live chat French style !


----------



## Nine Bob Note (Mar 16, 2020)

quimcunx said:


> View attachment 201957



I assume he's gonna use that to carry his toilet rolls?


----------



## Artaxerxes (Mar 16, 2020)

Big Bertha said:


> View attachment 201942



Extra soft loo roll.


----------



## editor (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 16, 2020)

I've been tracking C19 threads per new posts over the last few days, maybe a week. Latest peak is 13/20 on the first page. Up from about 7-8  last week. 

And once I've counted. The forum goes back on ignore. And I think there are now 3 non c19 forum threads elsewhere that can't be blocked. 

This really had gone viral and obvs I don't mean just here. Strange times, scary times


----------



## brogdale (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 16, 2020)

They're playing Jack (our late great SW9)'s song!


----------



## T & P (Mar 16, 2020)

Well, these guys are in for a surprise in a few weeks’ time...









						No news is good news: Big Brother guests unaware of pandemic
					

Information blackout only lifted in certain events like family illness, say producers




					www.theguardian.com
				




I’d like to watch that final interview in the Diary Room they do when they’ve been told they’re being evicted

‘Well Big Brother, the first things I’m going to do when I get out is enjoy the outdoors, go to the pub and catch up with my friends. I can’t wait!’

‘Erm, yeah, about that...’


----------



## petee (Mar 16, 2020)

petee said:


>




further to this









						It’s Hard to Believe David A. Clarke Was Recommended for a Real Job in Homeland Security | Right Wing Watch
					

Former Milwaukee County Sheriff David A. Clarke melted down in a profanity-laced Twitter rant on Sunday in which he encouraged the public to defy the




					www.rightwingwatch.org
				




it's so bad even twitter removed some posts


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 16, 2020)

T & P said:


> Well, these guys are in for a surprise in a few weeks’ time...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Reminds me of Dead Set


----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 16, 2020)

Didn't know where to put this, but somebody I know just used that 'boomer cull' phrase in a group whatsapp. Not ironically either, he's prone to all this stuff, he has one of those Run DMC style t shirts with COR BYN on. He's 48 and goes drinking with his 70 odd year old dad all the time. Knobhead.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 16, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 17, 2020)

little_legs said:


>



My thoughts are arrest the lot of them, jail them until they've missed their flights and let them sort it out themselves; and force the bars to close and give heavy fines to the owners and the staff who served them.


----------



## Lurdan (Mar 17, 2020)

Seen outside a Brooklyn comic shop







_(Given that stocks of common sense seem to be running out in some areas I'd like to stress that using unsuitable toilet paper substitutes is a VERY BAD idea unless you want to paddle in sewage. In fact even if you do it's a VERY BAD idea, you dirtbag)._


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Mar 17, 2020)

Desperate times call for desperate measures


----------



## Badgers (Mar 17, 2020)

Tory MP for Mid-Derbyshire:


----------



## T & P (Mar 17, 2020)

T & P said:


> Well, these guys are in for a surprise in a few weeks’ time...
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Oohh... they're going to be told of the situation live on TV tonight...









						Coronavirus: German Big Brother cast told about pandemic live on TV
					

Some of the housemates - who hadn't been told about the pandemic - expressed fear for their parents.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Mar 17, 2020)

//


----------



## Maggot (Mar 17, 2020)

Reports that Cardi B is to become the new Covid 19 spokesperson are unconfirmed.


----------



## T & P (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 17, 2020)

Where’s Wally COVID 19 Edition.


----------



## A380 (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 17, 2020)

A380 said:


> Where’s Wally COVID 19 Edition.
> 
> View attachment 202087



How the hell is anyone supposed to read that small text?


----------



## Sweet FA (Mar 17, 2020)

On a teacher/TA group:


----------



## editor (Mar 17, 2020)

Nice one, Fruitbat  











						First Coronavirus themed single is released and it RULES! - Final Hours
					

Abdoujaparov featuring former Carter USM guitarist Fruitbat have been the first band [...]



					finalhours.org.uk


----------



## T & P (Mar 17, 2020)

Speaking of working for home, here's some vital advice for first-timers


----------



## Badgers (Mar 17, 2020)

> McDonalds has confirmed from 5am on Wednesday morning all restaurants in the UK and Ireland will close seating areas and temporarily move to being takeaway, drive-through and delivery operations only to deal with the COVID-19 outbreak


Shit. Just. Got. Real.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 17, 2020)

One of my mates messaged me yesterday 
 "I have 500 fags, another 400 on order, so it's batten down the hatches. Nightmare though, my firestick has stopped working, my Internet WiFi  has gone to pot as well. So I am watching re runs of Britain's got talent on you tube"
And this today


----------



## T & P (Mar 17, 2020)

Imagine if this had popped out 30 years ago before people had internet access. No fucker would last the full two weeks in self isolation


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 17, 2020)

Idiot Brit tourist decides to go for a swim in Spain


----------



## two sheds (Mar 17, 2020)

T & P said:


> Imagine if this had popped out 30 years ago before people had internet access. No fucker would last the full two weeks in self isolation



Ah but then we had the electric wireless that the family would gather round to listen to continuous Down Your Way episodes



.... 

yes fair point actually.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 17, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Ah but then we had the electric wireless that the family would gather round to listen to continuous Down Your Way episodes
> 
> 
> 
> ...



what ever happened to the BBCs North of England correspondent ?


----------



## two sheds (Mar 17, 2020)

He disappeared after a particularly messy episode of Heartbeat I think


----------



## MrSki (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 17, 2020)

Finally got my test results. Very relieved


----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 17, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>



  Sir Stevo is great. (For an Everton fan)


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 17, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 18, 2020)

This caught me at peak late-night grim work planning stuff and it made me LOL, wee a teeny bit, and sob



I really need to go to bed


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Mar 18, 2020)

Missing your gee gees?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 18, 2020)

A now ex friend of mine posted on FB proof that covid was a Chinese conspiracy and that they were taking over the world markets by creating and distributing it. He then posted proof that it is also a conspiracy by the government to cull populations and it wasn’t real anyway. Adding this to his far right views, having known him since school, he’s had to go.

I won’t post his bullshit here, or anywhere come to that.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 18, 2020)

dessiato said:


> A now ex friend of mine posted on FB proof that covid was a Chinese conspiracy and that they were taking over the world markets by creating and distributing it. He then posted proof that it is also a conspiracy by the government to cull populations and it wasn’t real anyway. Adding this to his far right views, having known him since school, he’s had to go.
> 
> I won’t post his bullshit here, or anywhere come to that.


I've successfully defused that bullshit twice IRL, but it's tedious.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)

Shit, I posted the un-cropped image  , let's try again.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 18, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I've successfully defused that bullshit twice IRL, but it's tedious.


It is so tiresome, isn’t it? Especially when their evidence looks so convincing. It only becomes clear how bull shit it is when you scrape the surface. Too many people take it at face value and never realise that it is bull.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 18, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 202146


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 18, 2020)

existentialist said:


>



Touching ones face is not recommended


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)

existentialist said:


>



I was just changing that as you posted, I had cropped it & posted the wrong one.


----------



## killer b (Mar 18, 2020)

My mate just posted this and it made me laugh like fuck.


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 18, 2020)

Mumbles274 said:


> Finally got my test results. Very relieved
> 
> View attachment 202128


I also had good news but when my partner saw the test results she got very upset...


----------



## chilango (Mar 18, 2020)

As in all good disaster movies the wildlife are taking over. Reading has gone feral, spotted this critter wandering around the town centre just now...


----------



## editor (Mar 18, 2020)

Haven't they suffered enough?









						'Sing across rooftops': Bono writes coronavirus song dedicated to Italy
					

Let Your Love Be Known, the U2 frontman’s first new music since 2017, was a St Patrick’s Day gift to quarantined Italians singing to each other from balconies




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Mar 18, 2020)

Your postman running a temperature is the last thing you need.


----------



## Numbers (Mar 18, 2020)

St. Patrick's Day revellers in Liverpool chant 'f**k the coronavirus'
					

St. Patrick's Day revellers in Liverpool chant 'f**k the coronavirus' on a club night.




					metro.co.uk


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)

Numbers said:


> St. Patrick's Day revellers in Liverpool chant 'f**k the coronavirus'
> 
> 
> St. Patrick's Day revellers in Liverpool chant 'f**k the coronavirus' on a club night.
> ...



WTF are these eejits doing?


----------



## [62] (Mar 18, 2020)

From someone claiming to be a recently retired (sacked?) teacher on Rail UK forums. Christ, what a fuckwit...


----------



## Badgers (Mar 18, 2020)

Numbers said:


> St. Patrick's Day revellers in Liverpool chant 'f**k the coronavirus'
> 
> 
> St. Patrick's Day revellers in Liverpool chant 'f**k the coronavirus' on a club night.
> ...


That is one of the most irresponsible of the many posted online


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2020)

[62] said:


> From someone claiming to be a recently retired (sacked?) teacher on Rail UK forums. Christ, what a fuckwit...
> View attachment 202170


In my experience retired teachers are not the font of education you think they are tbh


----------



## T & P (Mar 18, 2020)

petee said:


>



Fucking hell


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 18, 2020)

> British professor Neil Ferguson, who was in 10 Downing Street this week after convincing the Prime Minister to stiffen his response to the Coronavirus Outbreak has self-isolated after developing a persistent dry cough and a fever


----------



## 2hats (Mar 18, 2020)

Badgers said:


>


----------



## Badgers (Mar 18, 2020)

Snotty snoughts in the trough eh? 

Hopefully the Tories have stopped sharing roll up £50 notes and have isolated Gove's private bathroom.


----------



## bellaozzydog (Mar 18, 2020)

The best Corvus-19 thread


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2020)

Just had an email about my pet insurance in the U.K. 

‘Good afternoon,​

We appreciate you might be worried about the impact the coronavirus may have on your insurance with us. 

Please be assured that *Debenhams Pet Insurance*is closely monitoring the situation and doing all that we can to provide the services you require at this time. 

In order to help us deliver the best possible service, we ask that you only call if absolutely necessary. For example; if you have a concern regarding your renewal or you wish to cancel your policy.’

I wasn’t aware dogs could get the virus ? 
​


----------



## treelover (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2020)

two sheds said:


> He disappeared after a particularly messy episode of Heartbeat I think


Always possessed a large moustache and filmed in a sheepskin standing in front of some trees and the odd animal


----------



## Teaboy (Mar 18, 2020)

London rumour mill is really whirring.  Talk of full City shut down from tomorrow.  All bars, cafes and restaurants to be forced to shut as no one was taking any notice of Johnson's advice.  This is the problem when virtually everything you say is an obvious lie, people ignore you even when you're trying to be honest.

I'm sure its nothing to do with Westminster area and all the old moneyed types there.


----------



## Teaboy (Mar 18, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Just had an email about my pet insurance in the U.K.
> 
> ‘Good afternoon,​
> 
> ...



I think the virus can survive on their fur but won't affect them.  Probably just people jamming the phones line trying to find out whether their mutt will be covered if it gets the virus.


----------



## editor (Mar 18, 2020)

Wrestling without an audience is like weird theatre


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 18, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> London rumour mill is really whirring.  Talk of full City shut down from tomorrow.  All bars, cafes and restaurants to be forced to shut as no one was taking any notice of Johnson's advice.  This is the problem when virtually everything you say is an obvious lie, people ignore you even when you're trying to be honest.
> 
> I'm sure its nothing to do with Westminster area and all the old moneyed types there.


I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop.  It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.


----------



## Teaboy (Mar 18, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop.  It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.



Oh.  I fear that statement will get you proper internet shamed here.  10, 9, 8, 7...


----------



## belboid (Mar 18, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop.  It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.


I was wondering about ordering a barrel from the brewery. I'll be asking when we go to the pub quiz later tonight


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)

editor said:


> Wrestling without an audience is like weird theatre




TBF wrestling with an audience is like weird theatre.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 18, 2020)

editor said:


> Wrestling without an audience is like weird theatre



very weird


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop.  It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.





belboid said:


> I was wondering about ordering a barrel from the brewery. I'll be asking when we go to the pub quiz later tonight



Urbs on a mission to catch & spread coronavirus.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## little_legs (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Doctor Carrot (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Mar 18, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Urbs on a mission to catch & spread coronavirus.


there'll be four or five tables of people in different corners of the pub. our table would all be seeing each other anyway (and will all be symptomless, as i trust the others will be). The whole place will be less crowded than the supermarket I just pointlessly walked around, or the workplace mrsb has spent all day in. and the pub will need some trade if it isn't to be completely fucked.


----------



## petee (Mar 18, 2020)

🤣🤪


----------



## little_legs (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 18, 2020)

belboid said:


> I was wondering about ordering a barrel from the brewery. I'll be asking when we go to the pub quiz later tonight


Lots of local breweries have started free deliveries of bottled beers.  I took delivery of a mixed case this morning.  I expect your local brewery will be very happy to deliver a barrel to you!


----------



## brogdale (Mar 18, 2020)

BBC R5 saying that _THERE IS NO LOCKDOWN OF LONDON IMMINENT!!_

Can't be long, then.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2020)

Local bar social distancing in action


----------



## sojourner (Mar 18, 2020)

Two people in work have shown me photos on their phone of soldiers and army trucks supposedly on the M62 by us today. When asked the source of the photos, both said 'a friend'. What questioned further, they had no fucking idea of the actual source, but claimed that the military will be imposing a lockdown on us tomorrow


----------



## belboid (Mar 18, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Local bar social distancing in action


didn't know you'd grown a beard!


----------



## Teaboy (Mar 18, 2020)

sojourner said:


> Two people in work have shown me photos on their phone of soldiers and army trucks supposedly on the M62 by us today. When asked the source of the photos, both said 'a friend'. What questioned further, they had no fucking idea of the actual source, but claimed that the military will be imposing a lockdown on us tomorrow



This rumour is going round London as well.


----------



## sojourner (Mar 18, 2020)

Just had someone else say it too - said her brother had actually seen them.


----------



## Pickman's model (Mar 18, 2020)

sojourner said:


> Two people in work have shown me photos on their phone of soldiers and army trucks supposedly on the M62 by us today. When asked the source of the photos, both said 'a friend'. What questioned further, they had no fucking idea of the actual source, but claimed that the military will be imposing a lockdown on us tomorrow


it's obvs a coup attempt


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 18, 2020)

'Sing across rooftops': Bono writes coronavirus song dedicated to Italy
					

Let Your Love Be Known, the U2 frontman’s first new music since 2017, was a St Patrick’s Day gift to quarantined Italians singing to each other from balconies




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## brogdale (Mar 18, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> it's obvs a coup attempt


Credible reports of Special Forces already spotted behind enemy lines in Sarf London.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 18, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> 'Sing across rooftops': Bono writes coronavirus song dedicated to Italy
> 
> 
> Let Your Love Be Known, the U2 frontman’s first new music since 2017, was a St Patrick’s Day gift to quarantined Italians singing to each other from balconies
> ...


That's all we need. Fucking Bongo sticking his oar in.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2020)

belboid said:


> didn't know you'd grown a beard!


Reminds me must go to the barbers before they close them down


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> it's obvs a coup attempt


Bumped into a barmy Yorkshire bloke here , harmless but boring, who told me that this was all the work of the deep state to unseat Boris and Trump


----------



## Pickman's model (Mar 18, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Bumped into a barmy Yorkshire bloke here , harmless but boring, who told me that this was all the work of the deep state to unseat Boris and Trump


it'd have been a lot simpler and less bloody if they'd simply assassinated the twain


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 18, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> Oh.  I fear that statement will get you proper internet shamed here.  10, 9, 8, 7...


See Cupid Stunts' post at 4.08!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 18, 2020)

That's me at the back of the queue.


----------



## belboid (Mar 18, 2020)

The Leadmill are facing up to being closed for god knows how long by selling essential items they're not going to need:



(£1.89 for four!)


----------



## magneze (Mar 18, 2020)

Doctor Carrot said:


> View attachment 202194


They'll also recycle it if you send it back to them afterwards. Very generous.


----------



## editor (Mar 18, 2020)

My new game* is watching the TV adverts and saying, "nope" to every one that has now become a waste of money (e.g. cruise holidays, people sharing a pizza and everything else that involves groups of people all in close contact with each other). 

*yes, I'm already reduced to this


----------



## Mordi (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 18, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



Ah fuck I read this as niall ferguson at first


----------



## brogdale (Mar 18, 2020)

Rentier scum are on a no questions asked mortgage 'holiday'; meanwhile the tenants paying those mortgages get guaranteed bullying and hassle in 3 months.

Utter cunts.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 18, 2020)

sojourner said:


> Two people in work have shown me photos on their phone of soldiers and army trucks supposedly on the M62 by us today. When asked the source of the photos, both said 'a friend'. What questioned further, they had no fucking idea of the actual source, but claimed that the military will be imposing a lockdown on us tomorrow



My gf was showing me some bloke on FB saying he has a solider friend in Catterick Garrison who’s told him they are preparing for the lockdown tomorrow etc.

So it must be true etc.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 18, 2020)

Long-Term Survival: The Leading Prepper's Guide to Turn Your Home into a Disaster-Proof Shelter for Self-Sufficient Living eBook: Griffin, Beau: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store
					

Long-Term Survival: The Leading Prepper's Guide to Turn Your Home into a Disaster-Proof Shelter for Self-Sufficient Living eBook: Griffin, Beau: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store



					www.amazon.co.uk


----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## Ptolemy (Mar 18, 2020)

Here's one I really liked.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 19, 2020)

Ffs. Chuck D thinks coronavirus is 5g and that turning off LTE will save us 



Also, Carl Craig replied in the comments and it seems like he agrees


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## QueenOfGoths (Mar 19, 2020)

editor said:


> My new game* is watching the TV adverts and saying, "nope" to every one that has now become a waste of money (e.g. cruise holidays, people sharing a pizza and everything else that involves groups of people all in close contact with each other).
> 
> *yes, I'm already reduced to this


Until Monday the tannoy at work would occasionally explode with "Planning your holiday abroad? Come to us for preferential foreign currency rates!" 

It's now been discontinued!


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Cerv (Mar 19, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 202262



Home isolation will be fun when you’ve blocked the toilet pipe too


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)

Gin makers across the country are now producing hand sanitiser.   

Bristol -

Dundee' -








						Dundee distillery switches production from gin to hand sanitiser
					

Verdant Spirits was approached by local care organisations in the wake of the coronavirus outbreak.



					www.bbc.co.uk
				




Lincoln -








						Coronavirus: Gin distilleries switch to make hand sanitiser
					

Gin producers diversify into hand sanitisers to help ease a shortage during the coronavirus outbreak.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Gin makers across the country are now producing hand sanitiser.
> 
> Bristol -
> 
> ...


It'd better not interrupt the gin supply.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)

Just had this video shared on whatsapp, but I don't know how to share it here, it starts with Postcode Lottery song -

"Someone's knocking on the door, somebody's ringing the bell..."

The door slightly opens, and this guy yells, "Fuck off, you're self-isolating.'"


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 19, 2020)

I was sent a video that suggested people blast their noses with hair driers



😂


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

SORRY FAKE NEWS 
my mate who works at Heathrow sent this on his way home....


----------



## Numbers (Mar 19, 2020)

Fav local bar still open, but closed to general public.


----------



## prunus (Mar 19, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 202326
> my mate who works at Heathrow sent this on his way home....



Interesting.  Which driving-on-the-right country does he commute to his job at Heathrow from?


----------



## Fez909 (Mar 19, 2020)

prunus said:


> Interesting.  In which driving-on-the-right country does he commute to his job at Heathrow from?


----------



## prunus (Mar 19, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> View attachment 202330




Aaaarrrggh!!!


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

prunus said:


> Interesting.  In which driving-on-the-right country does he commute to his job at Heathrow from?


Right I’m going to have Words with him for that


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

Ah the little twat is saying someone sent it to him ,much cussing be gwaanin


----------



## Badgers (Mar 19, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> Ah the little twat is saying someone sent it to him ,much cussing be gwaanin


Share his social media profiles and phone number on here


----------



## bellaozzydog (Mar 19, 2020)

belboid said:


> there'll be four or five tables of people in different corners of the pub. our table would all be seeing each other anyway (and will all be symptomless, as i trust the others will be). The whole place will be less crowded than the supermarket I just pointlessly walked around, or the workplace mrsb has spent all day in. and the pub will need some trade if it isn't to be completely fucked.



yep just crack on, what’s more important than a pint of real ale and a chance, for once to dominate the pub quiz.
It will be a lazy victory as anyone with an IQ higher than a saveloy and with a modicum of social conscience will be at fucking home


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Share his social media profiles and phone number on here


Nah , I’m not that horrible , plus I don’t have work mates on my social media


----------



## Badgers (Mar 19, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> Nah , I’m not that horrible , plus I don’t have work mates on my social media


----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 19, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> Ah the little twat is saying someone sent it to him ,much cussing be gwaanin



It's the same photo (that and the mirror reversal so cars on left) that has been doing rounds on twitter, fb and whatsapp since last night, monty panesar tweeted it. If you reverse google search it you don't get the original hit (so presumably taken from a video or something) but loads of links to press articles (daily mail, buzzfeed etc) from yesterday going 'load of shit'


----------



## brogdale (Mar 19, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 202326
> 
> SORRY FAKE NEWS
> my mate who works at Heathrow sent this on his way home....


Driving on the right, now?


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 19, 2020)

this shit is getting serious just received a SMS from my local friendly drug dealer and the message ended with the below



> ** No Drop if you are on lockdown**


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> this shit is getting serious just received a SMS from my local friendly drug dealer and the message ended with the below


how could they tell ?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## chilango (Mar 19, 2020)

Surely, given the amount of time military vehicles spend chugging along the M4 etc. normally, someone could've circulated a better photo?


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Driving on the right, now?


we have been through this already up thread , ive edited the post now to FAKE NEWS


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

chilango said:


> Surely, given the amount of time military vehicles spend chugging along the M4 etc. normally, someone could've circulated a better photo?


yes im sorry , have cussed the fucker to the moon and back , especially when he said he already noticed the side of road thing .

TWAT , he lost what little respect I had from him , but he is part of my team so have to hold it down somewhat


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Mar 19, 2020)

bellaozzydog said:


> yep just crack on, what’s more important than a pint of real ale and a chance, for once to dominate the pub quiz.
> It will be a lazy victory as anyone with an IQ higher than a saveloy and with a modicum of social conscience will be at fucking home


and yet, all the normal attendee's were there, and we all managed to sit more than a safe distance away (almost as if we knew the establishment we were going to well and had made provisions).  You know pubs are also an important part of the community where you can meet people not on social media and trendy whatsapp groups (which are mainly supporting their more middle-class members currently). It was a good way of checking out that members of our community are getting support. And (as said above) it was much less crowded than supermarkets (with people buying beer, the selfish scum!) and workplaces. Not all pubs are rammed 'spoons' that can afford to be shut for months.

And we donated our winnings back to the, about to be unemployed, bar staff.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 19, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> View attachment 202366


nicked


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> View attachment 202366


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)

Buddy Bradley said:


> Nothing says "I love you" like a 24 pack of toilet rolls.





cupid_stunt said:


> Thanks for that suggestion, mother is now going to get some bog roll on Sunday, for the lolz.



Thanks to Buddy, I am just wrapping this...



Only a single roll, because she has 40 from before this even started, and I only have 9.


----------



## petee (Mar 19, 2020)

following Trump's lead from yesterday



e2a sorry, they just keep coming


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)

petee said:


> following Trump's lead from yesterday
> 
> 
> 
> e2a sorry, they just keep coming




China wasn't where MERS started, hence the name 'Middle East Respiratory Syndrome'.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)

.


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 19, 2020)

petee said:


> following Trump's lead from yesterday
> 
> 
> 
> e2a sorry, they just keep coming




There are pages of batshit like this on Rapture Ready News, I won’t link to it from here. But how can these evangelical looneys believe this stuff.
I howl with laughter at some of the supposedly news stories they pull in.
It really is a mad world.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Just had this video shared on whatsapp, but I don't know how to share it here, it starts with Postcode Lottery song -
> 
> "Someone's knocking on the door, somebody's ringing the bell..."
> 
> The door slightly opens, and this guy yells, "Fuck off, you're self-isolating.'"



I've uploaded it, but can't embed it, click here to view: Filebin

ETA - click 'download', it doesn't, it just plays.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Doctor Carrot (Mar 19, 2020)




----------



## Ax^ (Mar 19, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> how could they tell ?



if you come out sweating and cough was how i took that message


saying that he could of been requested to post something thru a letter box and take money that way

ffs people are using kitchen roll as toilet roll atm

and the fegal making 3 rolls of 1 pye shit paper out of your normal andrex


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 19, 2020)

Doctor Carrot said:


> View attachment 202394


Has anyone had the stomach to peek at his Churchill book ?


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 19, 2020)

someone will be along 


I'd rather drink a cat a bio sample of ebola


----------



## Voley (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## pinkychukkles (Mar 20, 2020)

Voley said:


> View attachment 202408


Parody a/c surely?


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 20, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> View attachment 202409



self-isolation is "on ice"


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 20, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> self-isolation is "on ice"


Is it?   
"Iso" is classic Aussie though.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 20, 2020)

Portugal's state of emergency 

At the start of the address, the PM stressed the role of security forces which now have the “repressive function to close businesses that cannot be in operation,  proceeding with the crime of disobedience”.


All businesses requiring the physical presence of customers/ clients are to close with the exception of supermarkets, fuel stations, pharmacies and banks.
A positive list is being drawn up of establishments that MUST stay open (says Expresso, explaining that beyond establishments recommended by the DGS, there could be others, like those that sell animal feed).
A negative list is being drawn up of businesses that MUST close. One of the overriding concerns is that lines of distribution must be maintained (and for this to be possible, production also has to be allowed to go ahead).
Restaurants and bars can all remain open, but will only be allowed to sell ‘take aways’ or effect home deliveries.
‘Teleworking’ (working from home on computers/ devices) is now obligatory for all functions that can be performed this way.
Public services are to be reduced to ‘the essential’.
All leisure/ cultural services and institutions must remain closed: this covers libraries, cinemas, theme parks, clubs, gyms etc.
Media organisations must continue working as long as social distancing measures are ensured.
Public transports stay in operation, albeit in a reduced capacity.
When it comes to the most vulnerable, the DGS is in collaboration with councils and social services to ensure these receive home-deliveries of ‘essential goods’ (food and medication).The message to everyone else is ‘look out for your elderly neighbours’.As the days progress it’s very likely there will be ‘times’ published in which the elderly are given preference for shopping.

Both Mr Costa and President Marcelo have praised the attitude of the Portuguese population this far. Communities have knuckled down from the outset, with many taking the State of Alert on face value, and voluntarily isolating since last week.


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 20, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> View attachment 202424



Where's this?


----------



## Part 2 (Mar 20, 2020)

Sound on...


----------



## Badgers (Mar 20, 2020)

Did not even know who this cunt is but I know know he is a cunt


----------



## spitfire (Mar 20, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> Where's this?



Iceland.

I'll get my coat.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 20, 2020)

Probably not the right place of it but...


----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 20, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> View attachment 202349



Also known as the Jazzz Express.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Voley (Mar 20, 2020)

pinkychukkles said:


> Parody a/c surely?


Check the date. He's got  a tweet for every occasion.


----------



## pinkychukkles (Mar 20, 2020)

👍
Ach, missed that.
You're so right though, so many of his previous tweets seem to come back to point out his hypocrisy, I'm surprised he hasn't got some minion to delete a load.


----------



## T & P (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 20, 2020)

pinkychukkles said:


> Parody a/c surely?



nnnope.


----------



## pinkychukkles (Mar 20, 2020)

It's a historic tweet from 2014… I missed reading the date.
I thought that was a tweet that he sent _himself like today  _which kinda wouldn't make much sense but you never know with Trump he comes out with so much BS.


----------



## Teaboy (Mar 20, 2020)

Part 2 said:


> Sound on...




I'm not sure I believe this is a real thing.  Wembley doesn't have a fully retractable roof.


----------



## Sweet FA (Mar 20, 2020)

Just now..


----------



## little_legs (Mar 20, 2020)

Just seen it too Sweet FA

screen grab of some guy walking on Leicester Sq in a plague mask


----------



## clicker (Mar 20, 2020)

And then he strolled back again .


----------



## little_legs (Mar 20, 2020)

Here is an uplifting video of Italian people talking about isolation. I don't think I'll be singing along with my neighbours, the poor couple definitely has their hands full, 2 of their kids are attempting to murder one another as I type this, or maybe they are just playing.


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 20, 2020)

after hearing tonight press conference one person really isnt happy :


----------



## A380 (Mar 20, 2020)

Part 2 said:


> Sound on...



A friend sent me this on WhatsApp. I laughed so much it hurt.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Mar 20, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Gin makers across the country are now producing hand sanitiser.


Tastes shit with the tonic


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 20, 2020)

Good to see the Morrisons ad on Sky News, apparently they are cutting prices on essentials. 

Not that they fucking have any.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 20, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Good to see the Morrisons ad on Sky News, apparently they are cutting prices on essentials.
> 
> Not that they fucking have any.


Morrisons have done well by their staff it seems. 

Asda have definitely put up prices a bit and (Walmart) hung their staff out to fry before, during and certainly after this.


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 20, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


Until they find out it's a stock of Izal toilet rolls


----------



## yield (Mar 20, 2020)

prunus said:


> Our picture of the expectancy of staying alive is miles divorced from almost all of human experience. For instance in the Roman Empire at the height of its sophistication about 30% of babies would die before the age of 1, and fewer than 50% would make it past the age of 5.
> 
> I do find this slightly comforting in the present predicament (not logical I know - but I’m human and hence not logical), that this is just what life is like, and we’ve been lulled by an abnormally quiescent century or so.


prunus child mortality was much lower among hunter gatherers. It was sedentary agriculture, admittedly forced by environmental changes, that caused the massive increase. 

Against the Grain by James C. Scott is really good on this.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 20, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



there is another twitter account out there on which martin is getting a virtual kicking ' The account formerly known as wetherspoons ' or something


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 20, 2020)

Of course there are instructional videos....
And I used to have a bit of a fascination with Bosch's weirdness...

Ok I admit initially triggered by the nude scene in a TV adaptation of the garden of earthly delights....


----------



## gosub (Mar 20, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> I'm not sure I believe this is a real thing.  Wembley doesn't have a fully retractable roof.



Does explain where all the tinned tomatos went though


----------



## keybored (Mar 20, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> after hearing tonight press conference one person really isnt happy :
> View attachment 202479


If only his mum was still around after today's announcement so she could shout "GET AHT AH MY PUB". To everyone.


----------



## keybored (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## blairsh (Mar 20, 2020)

.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Part 2 (Mar 20, 2020)

Have we had this one yet?...


----------



## keybored (Mar 20, 2020)

Part 2 said:


> Sound on...


----------



## Anju (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## YouSir (Mar 20, 2020)

Be Hank Hill, not Dale Gribble.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 20, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Mar 21, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> how could they tell ?



Maybe that's where all the testing kits have gone?


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Mar 21, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 202511


Your point, caller?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Your point, caller?



I don't think there's any point beyond sometimes media outlets do 'stage manage' what is actually shown on screen, we've seen it in recent GE campaigns, when it appears that there's a large rally, but someone takes a photo further back, exposing the fact that it's only a few dozen people. It's a fair point to illustrate the reporter is personal protection gear, when the cameraman isn't.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 21, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I don't think there's any point beyond sometimes media outlets do 'stage manage' what is actually shown on screen, we've seen it in recent GE campaigns, when it appears that there's a large rally, but someone takes a photo further back, exposing the fact that it's only a few dozen people. It's a fair point to illustrate the reporter is personal protection gear, when the cameraman isn't.


I've a feeling that's not why our favourite little Trumpist posted it, though...


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 21, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 202534



Yeah, and with the banks now essentially printing money for fun - they should hit the hard reset button and cancel all personal debt.

Let’s start afresh on a new path


----------



## Badgers (Mar 21, 2020)

A classic from Cold War Steve


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)

One for fans of Peaky Blinders.


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 21, 2020)

Weatherspoons have just announced they are staying open a further 3 weeks

 to allow people to find there way back from the toilets.


----------



## neonwilderness (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 21, 2020)

Anyone know if the Vanilla Experience on the A1 is still open?


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 21, 2020)

Good thread:


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)

Most sporting events are cancelled, but live boxing continues at your local supermarket.


----------



## planetgeli (Mar 21, 2020)

Who'd a thought they'd let us get away with not going to school, or not going to work but still pay our wages.

They'll be delivering mephedrone through our doors next at £7 a g.


----------



## Anju (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## moochedit (Mar 21, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Bumped into a barmy Yorkshire bloke here , harmless but boring, who told me that this was all the work of the deep state to unseat Boris and Trump



Someone at my work yesterday was trying to tell me covid19 is all a conspiracy by "the new world order" to scare us all into having vaccines. I told her she was talking bollocks and now she has just sent me a you tube david icke video. I know we shouldn't touch our faces but...


----------



## Badgers (Mar 21, 2020)

moochedit said:


> Someone at my work yesterday was trying to tell me covid19 is all a conspiracy by "the new world order" to scare us all into having vaccines. I told her she was talking bollocks and now she has just sent me a you tube david icke video. I know we shouldn't touch our faces but...


Would suffer that person is deluded and untrustworthy. Perhaps not a person who should be employed.


----------



## tony.c (Mar 21, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> Where's this?


East London apparently


----------



## Badgers (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## souljacker (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 21, 2020)

Tell you what, they must be having a right laugh about all of this up on the International Space Station...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2020)

Thinking about that ^^^, as much as I love tripping on shrooms, I am not sure I would want to ATM.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 21, 2020)

One problem with having so many cv threads is finding things you should have bookmarked at the time but didn't.

Like that tv interview with the masked-up woman which gave the most coherent advice on coronavirus that I've yet seen. Where is it????


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 21, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 202611


That would make a great sticker


----------



## two sheds (Mar 21, 2020)

Yep we're about to see the logical conclusion of running down the NHS and pay and working conditions for nurses over the last 30 years, cunts 

Eta: 40 not 30 years I'm so angry I can't count.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 21, 2020)

‪Nonna knows the score.

Capiche?


----------



## Doctor Carrot (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Mar 21, 2020)

Graffiti on Brighton beach.  Is that meant  to be a hammer and sickle????


----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 21, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> View attachment 202543




That you dessiato ?


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 21, 2020)

belboid said:


> Graffiti on Brighton beach.  Is that meant  to be a hammer and sickle????


Hockey stick and fly swatter.


----------



## Spymaster (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 21, 2020)

rubbershoes said:


> That you dessiato ?


If I did this I know how to get it out again.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 21, 2020)

you might be doing it for fun though


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 21, 2020)

.


----------



## chilango (Mar 21, 2020)

belboid said:


> Graffiti on Brighton beach.  Is that meant  to be a hammer and sickle????



Twenty years ago I went to Moscow and got shown a few early examples of the hammer and sickle that looked like that.

Clearly an afficionado.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Mar 21, 2020)

belboid said:


> Graffiti on Brighton beach.  Is that meant  to be a hammer and sickle????



Fucking cheeky seagull cunts.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 21, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 21, 2020)

U-S-A! U-S-A!.



jesus fucking christ.


----------



## nogojones (Mar 21, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Your point, caller?


Even the Telegraph thinks he's a twat









						The angriest Republican in Hollywood: how James Woods became a MAGA martyr
					

There was a time when James Woods was most famous for films like Videodrome and Casino, and a speciality for playing leathery sleazes and crooked gangsters.




					www.telegraph.co.uk
				




(James Wood that is, not Marty1. I don't think he's quite on their rada)r yet


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 21, 2020)

mr b has quit making facile plague inc (computer game) jokes since greenland got it's first case 5 days ago...

(greenland is notoriously difficult to infect, once you have you essentially "win" the game )


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 22, 2020)

Ponies make house calls to families in coronavirus isolation
					

Stables is taking requests for home visits...




					www.independent.co.uk


----------



## Epona (Mar 22, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> Ponies make house calls to families in coronavirus isolation
> 
> 
> Stables is taking requests for home visits...
> ...



I'll pretend to be self-isolating if I can have a pony visit.  I want to hug it though, look at its little face, it wants hugs - can I book a pony visit with hugs once this shit is over?


----------



## MrSki (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## little_legs (Mar 22, 2020)

At least the sports commentators have found something to do during this time of lockdown:


----------



## little_legs (Mar 22, 2020)

This one is even better:


----------



## MissActualKitty (Mar 22, 2020)

Epona said:


> I'll pretend to be self-isolating if I can have a pony visit.  I want to hug it though, look at its little face, it wants hugs - can I book a pony visit with hugs once this shit is over?


Ooh me too!! lol


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## Numbers (Mar 22, 2020)

Epona said:


> ....... can I book a pony visit with hugs once this shit is over?


I read this line in at least a cpl of different ways.


----------



## brogdale (Mar 22, 2020)

Think we may all get to appreciate the meaning of this idiom...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Mar 22, 2020)

Here's a Facebook post, from a coronavirus lockdown group, by someone pretending to have bbq'd some meat in their garden. The BBQ is clearly empty and too clean. Is it just me is that a really weird thing to do.


----------



## xes (Mar 22, 2020)

Fear?
Here you go. Over 14 million mobile accounts have been deactivated in China. Could this be an indicator to the true number of dead out there?


----------



## spitfire (Mar 22, 2020)

Anju said:


> Here's a Facebook post, from a coronavirus lockdown group, by someone pretending to have bbq'd some meat in their garden. The BBQ is clearly empty and too clean. Is it just me is that a really weird thing to do.
> View attachment 202741



* Dons BBQ nerd hat *

It's a smoker, the coals are in the bottom section under the second grille. There is usually a tray of water in the second chamber and he is cooking short ribs which can take many hours.


----------



## Anju (Mar 22, 2020)

spitfire said:


> * Dons BBQ nerd hat *
> 
> It's a smoker, the coals are in the bottom section under the second grille. There is usually a tray of water in the second chamber and he is cooking short ribs which can take many hours.
> 
> View attachment 202743



Thanks, my faith in humanity is restored.


----------



## spitfire (Mar 22, 2020)

Anju said:


> Thanks, my faith in humanity is restored.



Here to help.


----------



## keybored (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 22, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>




Saul [facepalming]


----------



## pesh (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 22, 2020)

Posted this three times. But it made me happy.


----------



## blairsh (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 22, 2020)

blairsh said:


> View attachment 202770


Wrong thread*, but well worth a "Like" anyway.

*I could tell because that's a fully-stocked supermarket shelf.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 22, 2020)

I am self isolating, as I expect to have to take over doing at least some of my mother's care visits at some point, so it was safe to take her Mother's Day present around. 




She laughed her arse off, I knew she would find it funny, but I wasn't expecting so much laughter, she proper set me off too.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)

I was a little bored last night, and I'd just opened a case of Corona... then looked across at the 3D printer


----------



## dessiato (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## wayward bob (Mar 22, 2020)

fucking class Saul Goodman 

eta: now quit fucking about and get making ventilators


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## wayward bob (Mar 22, 2020)

copper has significant protective properties agains c19 i read somewhere recently. just sayin' that's what i'd be hoarding... hang on that's what i'm already hoarding


----------



## blairsh (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 22, 2020)

florida man


----------



## HAL9000 (Mar 22, 2020)

Keep 1 pym seperation!



stay safe kids


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## blairsh (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 22, 2020)

petee said:


> florida man



Some bloke wrote a book in the 80s about treating cold and flu like this. Sounds torturous blasting yourself with hot air when you're struggling to breath.


----------



## petee (Mar 22, 2020)

xes said:


> Some bloke wrote a book in the 80s about treating cold and flu like this. Sounds torturous blasting yourself with hot air when you're struggling to breath.



to add, the "reliable source" OANN (one american news network) is like Distillation Of Fox. trump has used them as a foil to bash Fox when he was unhappy with them.


----------



## Supine (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 22, 2020)

⚠️ *IMPORTANT* ⚠️
Be careful, theres a link going round for a live stream of Chris Martin from coldplay doing a gig live from his home. DO NOT CLICK THE LINK. It will take you to a live stream of Chris Martin doing a gig live from his home


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 22, 2020)

First tears (of laughter) in a few days. And fair play to Sturgeon for the retweet.


----------



## HAL9000 (Mar 22, 2020)

Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY), who was the only senator to oppose a coronavirus relief package last month, announced Sunday that he has tested positive for the virus.

“He is feeling fine and is in quarantine,” an announcement on his Twitter said. “He is asymptomatic and was tested out of an abundance of caution due to his extensive travel and events.”


----------



## moochedit (Mar 22, 2020)

How Much Toilet Paper?! - The Toilet Paper Calculator
					

I will survive with my toilet roll in quarantine! How long will you last?




					howmuchtoiletpaper.com


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)

moochedit said:


> How Much Toilet Paper?! - The Toilet Paper Calculator
> 
> 
> I will survive with my toilet roll in quarantine! How long will you last?
> ...


1 roll will last 5 days? Obviously written by a single man, who never lived with a woman


----------



## moochedit (Mar 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> 1 roll will last 5 days? Obviously written by a single man, who never lived with a woman



Try the advanced options


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 22, 2020)

So the sister is married to a bit of conspricy/trump supporting nut case

and after talking to her on the weekend is throwing bleach down the toilet everytime someone has a shit in here house to avoid picking up the carnovirus from her kids shit


has anyone heard this ballocks as i did not want to bash her to much as she pretty freaked out about it all

lives in North ireland with her elderly Father in law who has COPD


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> 1 roll will last 5 days? Obviously written by a single man with skid marked drawers, who never lived with a woman




fify


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)

moochedit said:


> Try the advanced options


'Sheets per wipe' only goes up to 10.
I reiterate... Obviously written by a single man, who never lived with a woman


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> So the sister is married to a bit of conspricy/trump supporting nut case
> 
> and after talking to her on the weekend is throwing bleach down the toilet everytime someone has a shit in here house to avoid picking up the carnovirus from her kids shit
> 
> ...


I have a septic tank where I live, so using lots of bleach would be a bad thing, as it would kill all the poo eating bacteria, but even so, I wouldn't like the idea of hoofing loads of bleach into the sewers,


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 22, 2020)

she more than likely has a spectic tank as she lives in the arseholes of north ireland 

was just wondering were the Trump supporting Brother in law would of heard this ballocks

same guy suggested the bleach cure for authism to a mutual friend

was almost going to send him back simular links that it cures the carnovirus but don't want it trying it out on her kids


----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## moochedit (Mar 22, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> So the sister is married to a bit of conspricy/trump supporting nut case
> 
> and after talking to her on the weekend is throwing bleach down the toilet everytime someone has a shit in here house to avoid picking up the carnovirus from her kids shit
> 
> ...



I guess she has seen stories like this and overeacted. I haven't seen any official advice to put bleach in the toilet every time it is used though!

Metro.co.uk: Scientists find coronavirus 'could spread in human poo and urine'.








						Scientists find coronavirus 'could spread in human poo and urine'
					

The World Health Organization’s analysis has surprised experts who believed coronavirus would be destroyed as it makes its way through the gut.




					metro.co.uk


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 22, 2020)

Thanks Moonchedit


fair enough I'll still resist telling her that if the situations goes south and the kids already have the virus bleaching the toilet is not going to resolve it


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> she more than likely has a spectic tank as she lives in the arseholes of north ireland
> 
> was just wondering were the Trump supporting Brother in law would of heard this ballocks
> 
> ...


Tell her she'll be getting the septic tank emptied every few weeks when the dead otters start surfacing.

And that she should stop listening to an obvious mental case.


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 22, 2020)

she 3 kids in and has moved to a town in north ireland with around 300 people in it 

she already pretty much self isolated but still freaking out

me telling her to not listen to the hubby will only lead to not talking to her

what can ya do


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> a town in north ireland with around 300 people in it


A veritable metropolis


----------



## existentialist (Mar 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> 1 roll will last 5 days? Obviously written by a single man, who never lived with a woman


Well, I don't know about "who never lived with a woman", but I calculate that in the 14 months I have lived here, I have bought a total of 57 toilet rolls, not counting the pack currently in use. So I reckon that works out at about 4 rolls a month. And I use it to blow my nose (I usually have a morning sneezing fit as part of my daily workout routine ) as well.

OK, I'm..._economical_ in my use of it, but not to any extent I'd think of as unhygienic.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 22, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> So the sister is married to a bit of conspricy/trump supporting nut case
> 
> and after talking to her on the weekend is throwing bleach down the toilet everytime someone has a shit in here house to avoid picking up the carnovirus from her kids shit
> 
> ...


She's more likely to infect herself via (unbleached) droplet infection from sploshing stuff down the bog when someone's just taken a shit in it.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 22, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> she 3 kids in and has moved to a town in north ireland with around 300 people in it
> 
> she already pretty much self isolated but still freaking out
> 
> ...


I think being the voice of reason, quietly and calmly allaying the fears he's probably happily frothing up, pretty much as you are doing, seems like the best option. She'll probably appreciate someone who isn't babbling endlessly about the next big threat/drama/conspiracy theory.


----------



## Ax^ (Mar 22, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I think being the voice of reason, quietly and calmly allaying the fears he's probably happily frothing up, pretty much as you are doing, seems like the best option. She'll probably appreciate someone who isn't babbling endlessly about the next big threat/drama/conspiracy theory.



he was not always a headcase but its come on over the last 5 years


aye i'm there for her as a calming voice as are other family  members and mutual friends but she going dragged into it


when this started i was going to wind her up about it being a chemical introduced to the population via chemtrails that was activated by 5G

I resisted she is still family and him by extension it just not a situation i can interven with from london


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Mar 22, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 22, 2020)

trans: Wash your hands like you just cut up chillies and now want to have a wank

I know that wasn't strictly necessary to translate but what ho.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 22, 2020)

spitfire said:


> Wash your hands like you just cut up chillies and now want to have a wank







spitfire said:


> I know that wasn't strictly necessary to translate but what ho.



it was for those of us whose knowledge of german is very limited.  i'd got as far as something about washing hands and masturbating, but the rest was beyond me...


----------



## spitfire (Mar 22, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> it was for those of us whose knowledge of german is very limited.  i'd got as far as something about washing hands and masturbating, but the rest was beyond me...



Glad I bothered then. 

I learnt German when I was a teenager and have an alright understanding of it still but only found out today what the german for wanking is!


----------



## Aladdin (Mar 22, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Well, I don't know about "who never lived with a woman", but I calculate that in the 14 months I have lived here, I have bought a total of 57 toilet rolls, not counting the pack currently in use. So I reckon that works out at about 4 rolls a month. And I use it to blow my nose (I usually have a morning sneezing fit as part of my daily workout routine ) as well.
> 
> OK, I'm..._economical_ in my use of it, but not to any extent I'd think of as unhygienic.



Ah but maybe you went to the loo elsewhere? Pub? Work? 😁


----------



## existentialist (Mar 22, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> Ah but maybe you went to the loo elsewhere? Pub? Work? 😁


Nearly all of my shits happen chez moi.


----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 22, 2020)

All that rice people have stockpiled? Dinner next week.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 22, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> Ah but maybe you went to the loo elsewhere? Pub? Work? 😁



the current crisis adds a further level of satisfaction to going to the karsey at work - not only are you doing it on company time, you're also using company bog roll...



(and yes i am considered to be in a key job and no i can't work from home)


----------



## Aladdin (Mar 22, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Nearly all of my shits happen chez moi.



Okay ... 👍


----------



## petee (Mar 23, 2020)

Ax^ said:


> was just wondering were the Trump supporting Brother in law would of heard this ballocks
> 
> same guy suggested the bleach cure for authism to a mutual friend



using bleach, like using colloidal silver (as i mentioned somewhere else around here), is real rightwing, Q-type, prepper, stigg-it-to-the-libs stuff. if that guy's a trumper he could have picked it up anywhere on his internet travels. 

it cures HIV too.








						GOP Firebrand Alan Keyes Helps Sell Toxic Bleach as an HIV Cure
					

The FDA warns that Miracle Mineral Solution can be fatal, but desperate consumers aren’t getting the message.




					www.poz.com


----------



## two sheds (Mar 23, 2020)

petee said:


> using bleach, like using colloidal silver (as i mentioned somewhere else around here), is real rightwing, Q-type, prepper, stigg-it-to-the-libs stuff. if that guy's a trumper he could have picked it up anywhere on his internet travels.
> 
> it cures HIV too.
> 
> ...



Yes somewhat terminal definition of 'cures' there.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 23, 2020)

Shit just got bad


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Shit just got good
> 
> View attachment 202844


FTFY


----------



## a_chap (Mar 23, 2020)

Closed all McDonald's you say?

At least it proves the old saying "Every cloud has a silver lining"


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Athos (Mar 23, 2020)

Rutita1 said:


> All that rice people have stockpiled? Dinner next week.
> 
> View attachment 202839



With a toilet paper side salad.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2020)

a_chap said:


> Closed all McDonald's you say?
> 
> At least it proves the old saying "Every cloud has a silver lining"


Except for their, already badly treated, staff.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 23, 2020)

Politicians who campaigned for Leave shocked that people won't listen to experts
					

Key figures of the Leave campaign such as Michael Gove and Boris Johnson are perplexed that the people that voted to stick two fingers up to experts and the government are now ignoring the social distancing advice of experts and the government.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 23, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 202858





			https://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/change-walk-to-wa-k.369980/page-4#post-16454837


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)

The Times cartoon today -


----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> https://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/change-walk-to-wa-k.369980/page-4#post-16454837


That’s me too


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 23, 2020)

dessiato said:


> That’s me too


Oh! You get everywhere!


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Mar 23, 2020)

That joke with that photo (which we’ve now had twice) originally had a slightly different feed line and “no problem, Alan” as the punchline.  And it was better for it.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 23, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> View attachment 202865


----------



## pesh (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Doodler (Mar 23, 2020)

Recent news story about youths in West Yorkshire gobbing and coughing at the police. The teenage superpower of CV virtual immunity!

Some may remember Action comic from the 70s. The 'Kids Rule OK' strip started with a plague that killed most adults, teachers and coppers most of all, but left the youngers unharmed.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 23, 2020)

They closed the pubs !


----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## cybershot (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## ice-is-forming (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## donkyboy (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## donkyboy (Mar 23, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 202869



they fucked up with this. should have said: quaranteen.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 23, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 202869


I posted this days ago , do try and keep up #980


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)

*WARNING!*

If you receive an email with 'Ding Dong' in the subject line - *DO NOT OPEN IT!*

It's the Jehovah's Witnesses working from home.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 23, 2020)

Groan


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)

on a lighter note I received this from a friend last night - told him he would regret it today: 

Heard some advice on the radio last night, it said to have inner peace, that we should always finish things we start,  and we all could use more calm in our lives. I looked through my house to find things that I'd started and hadn't finished, so I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Whiskey, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, tha mainder of Valiumun srciptuns, an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how feckin fablus I feel rite now. Sned this to all who need inner piss. An telum u luvum. And two al bee hapee wilst in de instalation.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 23, 2020)

This one is good, probably belongs on another thread. My mate was having trouble explaining the reasons behind distancing and isolation to a petulant 13 year old boy and apparently this worked:


----------



## prunus (Mar 23, 2020)

Big Bertha said:


> View attachment 202921



He took 14 each of the ones for eating didn’t he?  And 14 of each type of bird too I think. But why should they know that kind of thing?


----------



## cybershot (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


> This one is good, probably belongs on another thread. My mate was having trouble explaining the reasons behind distancing and isolation to a petulant 13 year old boy and apparently this worked:
> 
> View attachment 202932


----------



## JimW (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)

prunus said:


> He took 14 each of the ones for eating didn’t he?  And 14 of each type of bird too I think. But why should they know that kind of thing?


Didn’t know that tbh


----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 23, 2020)

Edit: oops...done already


----------



## A380 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 202968



I've got my own version, anything 'up north' should be sealed off.


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 23, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> H


_Her_ Majesty's men


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## MickiQ (Mar 23, 2020)

Lego bringing out a new range


----------



## A380 (Mar 23, 2020)

Drug dealers not tardy- 20 mins after the start of Boris’s broadcast...


----------



## 8ball (Mar 23, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> View attachment 202954



Dunno whether its too oversimplified, or still too complex for the fuckwits.


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 23, 2020)

REMAIN INDOORS:


----------



## Chester Copperpot (Mar 23, 2020)

Heh


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 23, 2020)

Where to go next weekend


----------



## MrSki (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## Epona (Mar 23, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



Actually minimum recommended depth for burials in the UK is 2ft, and the average is 4ft.  There is no legal requirement in terms of depth.  The whole 6ft thing is a bit of a myth here.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 23, 2020)




----------



## savoloysam (Mar 23, 2020)

Apparently Bono is going to write a song for us.....this virus really is a killer.


----------



## savoloysam (Mar 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




They look like WWE morons to me.


----------



## belboid (Mar 23, 2020)

savoloysam said:


> They look like WWE morons to me.


or a rival wrestling federation (from the logo bottom left)


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 24, 2020)

French consultant suggests facial hair poses a significant health risk because viruses stick to it









						"Il faut vous raser", Patrick Pelloux déconseille la barbe pour lutter contre le coronavirus
					

Le médecin urgentiste explique que le virus peut tenir "plusieurs heures" sur une barbe ou une moustache.




					www.bfmtv.com


----------



## cybershot (Mar 24, 2020)

Today’s essential shopping list:
Lonsdale hoodie, 3 Slazenger polo shirts, some Donnay trainer socks, huge mug the size of a bucket. Also a pack of biros, some post it notes and a pencil case.
Any idea if there’s anywhere open that I could get these vital items?


----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 24, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> French consultant suggests facial hair poses a significant health risk because viruses stick to it
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Ah fucks sake, one of few things I was looking forward to during hibernation was chance to grow a fucking beard without feeling like a dick


----------



## hegley (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Spymaster (Mar 24, 2020)

belboid said:


> Graffiti on Brighton beach.  Is that meant  to be a hammer and sickle????


Yes. And Mr Surrender.


----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Mar 24, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> French consultant suggests facial hair poses a significant health risk because viruses stick to it
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I'm going to shave mine as I've realised just what a bad beer stroking habit I have. I may post pics later.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## blairsh (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 24, 2020)

^^^ Towards the bottom of the last page, mate.


----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 24, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



Honestly though what a twat


----------



## dessiato (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 24, 2020)

Video coverage of previously reported post on here.









						This Tug Boat Just Sailed Down The Thames Blasting 'Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life'
					

When you're feeling in the dumps, don't be silly chumps.




					londonist.com


----------



## platinumsage (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## TopCat (Mar 24, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Good. I buy wholemeal pasta.


Its rank. Try and  serve it to a  italian.


----------



## TopCat (Mar 24, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> View attachment 201150


Excellent. My old company were all born again Christians. I will check on them later.


----------



## platinumsage (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Mar 24, 2020)

TopCat said:


> Its rank. Try and  serve it to a  italian.


Fortunately, as I am not Italian, I can eat it


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 24, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Fortunately, as I am not Italian, I can eat it


I like it too - and wholegrain rice.  Keeps you regular.


----------



## Epona (Mar 24, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I like it too - and wholegrain rice.  Keeps you regular.



Keeps you regularly wishing you hadn't bought it


----------



## dessiato (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 24, 2020)

platinumsage said:


>



The hat and glasses suit him


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Mar 24, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I like it too - and wholegrain rice.  Keeps you regular.


Yes. And happy guts mean happy people


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 24, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I like it too - and wholegrain rice.  Keeps you regular.



Can live with wholegrain pasta but wholegrain/brown rice is just fucking misery on a plate. Makes me want to eat a whole loaf of cheap white and utterly butterly


----------



## Epona (Mar 24, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> Can live with wholegrain pasta but wholegrain/brown rice is just fucking misery on a plate. Makes me want to eat a whole loaf of cheap white and utterly butterly



Other way round for me, wholegrain rice is something I quite enjoy in rice salads, but wholegrain pasta can go fuck itself...


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 24, 2020)

I like brown rice. It goes really nicely with vegetable curries and the like.
Less keen on brown pasta though.
Glad I could share that with you all.


----------



## belboid (Mar 24, 2020)

Epona said:


> Other way round for me, wholegrain rice is something I quite enjoy in rice salads, but wholegrain pasta can go fuck itself...


mrsb has just got into some green (as in the colour) pasta.  It tastes like its still got bits of earth stuck in it.


----------



## Epona (Mar 24, 2020)

belboid said:


> mrsb has just got into some green (as in the colour) pasta.  It tastes like its still got bits of earth stuck in it.



Oh if that's the one with spinach in it, I love that stuff.  Taglietelle with a fairly light cheese sauce, OMG, I want some now.  I have a bag of 'tricolore' spaghetti, that might have to do.  Not tonight though, I'm defrosting beef for a chilli.


----------



## belboid (Mar 24, 2020)

Epona said:


> Oh if that's the one with spinach in it, I love that stuff.  Taglietelle with a fairly light cheese sauce, OMG, I want some now.  I have a bag of 'tricolore' spaghetti, that might have to do.  Not tonight though, I'm defrosting beef for a chilli.


it does have spinach in (which will be why its green) but it has something else as well.  Which tastes like mud that was caked on the spinach.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 24, 2020)

belboid said:


> mrsb has just got into some green (as in the colour) pasta.  It tastes like its still got bits of earth stuck in it.


That's ever so easy to make. You literally just add spinach to flour and blitz the chap out of it till it's a dough. Then former it into green bean shapes.

This is the recipe I most often use.








						Spinach pici pasta | Jamie Oliver recipes
					

Jamie Oliver's spinach pici pasta is not only delicious, but full of veg. If you've never made homemade pasta before, this is the perfect recipe to try. Also, if you skip the Parmesan cheese, it's vegan, too – winner!




					www.jamieoliver.com


----------



## chilango (Mar 24, 2020)

Finally got my Government text. Google didn't like it.


----------



## keybored (Mar 24, 2020)

spitfire said:


>




Given a couple of lines of the lyrics in that song; what the fuck were they thinking?


----------



## two sheds (Mar 24, 2020)

dessiato said:


> That's ever so easy to make. You literally just add spinach to flour and blitz the chap out of it till it's a dough. Then former it into green bean shapes.



and add little bits of earth


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 24, 2020)

chilango said:


> Finally got my Government text.



Me too.

I was starting to think they left me out on purpose, so I would break the rules & go out, allowing them to shoot me.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 24, 2020)

chilango said:


> Finally got my Government text. Google didn't like it.
> 
> View attachment 203158


I got one too, a text telling me to stay indoors with a link telling me that I can go outdoors.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 24, 2020)

^^^ Not on the rooftops around here, the bastards are now nesting & waking me up before daybreak, the cunts.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## smmudge (Mar 24, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 203166



But what if covid 19 IS THE ALIEN INVASION???


----------



## MrSki (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 24, 2020)

Damn. so many fake stories









						Nat Geo: Those Viral Animal Photos You've Been Seeing on Twitter are Fake
					

Over the past few weeks, as people the world over were asked (or ordered) to stay home and isolate, you probably saw more than a few viral photos of




					petapixel.com


----------



## two sheds (Mar 24, 2020)

(((drunk elephants)))


----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 24, 2020)

Wait there, did people actually believe dolphins were bopping round by st marks square and putin put an army of lions out on the streets, I thought they were just shit memes from the start


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 24, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 25, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


>



Best thing today.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 25, 2020)

A new anti-virus door god in Hong Kong:


----------



## dessiato (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## blairsh (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 25, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> A new anti-virus door god in Hong Kong:


Coincidentally I was in town on Saturday and popped in the Chinese supermarket and while I was there, the owner popped out to pray at the doorway


----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 25, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> View attachment 203213


Batshit crazy indeed.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 25, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> View attachment 203213


Just posted this on my Conspiracay theory mates page, who is going on about some t-shirt photo bollox about Tom Hanks, I've just ended up blocking him, shame


----------



## JimW (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## steveseagull (Mar 25, 2020)

I came across one of those 5g/corona conspiracy theorists yesterday in a local Facebook group. it is pointless engaging with them as they just point you towards a crank YouTube video or other nonsense.

Shame as he otherwise comes across as a nice guy


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Mar 25, 2020)

It’s all definitely under control, says man pleading for 250,000 untrained volunteers to work in hospitals
					

Health Secretary Matt Hancock has once again soothed a frightened nation by telling them the government knows how to deal with the coronavirus and by the way if you feel like you want to try something that normally requires 4-years of training then feel free to pop on over to your local hospital.




					newsthump.com


----------



## chilango (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 25, 2020)

gosub said:


>




That's cruel to wind her up like that.


----------



## strung out (Mar 25, 2020)

chilango said:


>



Fucking pricks


----------



## platinumsage (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Mar 25, 2020)

chilango said:


>




On another thread ER has said that it's actually a white supremacist group not ER itself. Worth amending your post if so (not sure of thread sorry).

Eta: Coronavirus in the UK - news, lockdown and discussion


----------



## chilango (Mar 25, 2020)

two sheds said:


> On another thread ER has said that it's actually a white supremacist group not ER itself. Worth amending your post if so (not sure of thread sorry).
> 
> Eta: Coronavirus in the UK - news, lockdown and discussion



Someone else (MadeInBedlam maybe?) posted it on the other thread.

I remember similar issues with fash using the EF! umbrella (that might have been in the East Midlands too iirc) 25 years ago.


----------



## Shechemite (Mar 25, 2020)

chilango said:


> Someone else (MadeInBedlam maybe?) posted it on the other thread.
> 
> I remember similar issues with fash using the EF! umbrella (that might have been in the East Midlands too iirc) 25 years ago.



Well yes hence I made the point that other (well, real) XR branches condemned it


----------



## Artaxerxes (Mar 25, 2020)

chilango said:


>




Apparently a far right group being shit.


----------



## Shechemite (Mar 25, 2020)

I mean


----------



## hegley (Mar 25, 2020)

Bless him


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 25, 2020)

> My husband purchased a world map.... gave me a dart and said "throw this and wherever it lands I'm taking you for a holiday when this pandemic is over". Turns out we're spending two weeks behind the fridge.


----------



## hegley (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 25, 2020)

hegley said:


> Bless him



I hate the fact that he's so fucking likeable in his tweets.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Mar 25, 2020)

.


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 25, 2020)

chilango said:


>




The Fat White Family has been saying similar stuff on Facebook, try-hard controversialists that they are.

"This is an easier, relatively guilt free way of making the necessary cull our ecological collapse has so long been screaming out for. A major war might have made for better cinema further down the line it’s true...."


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 25, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 203281


Most likely a 2 for 1 offer. I can't see anyone panic buying children.


----------



## A380 (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Mar 25, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Most likely a 2 for 1 offer. I can't see anyone panic buying children.



They don't freeze well so I'd have just left it tbh


----------



## editor (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 25, 2020)

Sports commentator   fills in time


----------



## editor (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Mar 25, 2020)

editor said:


> I hate the fact that he's so fucking likeable in his tweets.


Indeed


----------



## dessiato (Mar 25, 2020)

Bit of sentimental tosh, it would be nice if it were to become true, perhaps.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 25, 2020)

I had to go into the bank today. It felt really weird. I haven't worn a mask and gloves into a bank for years.


----------



## xes (Mar 25, 2020)

It's alright, I'm sure this one really is just the sniffles....


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 25, 2020)

Have accidentally come across the usual fascists claiming that Muslims have been given special dispensation to pray on the streets, using various old photos to "prove" this.


----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 25, 2020)

two sheds said:


> On another thread ER has said that it's actually a white supremacist group not ER itself. Worth amending your post if so (not sure of thread sorry).
> 
> Eta: Coronavirus in the UK - news, lockdown and discussion


Those "stickers" look shooped.


----------



## elbows (Mar 25, 2020)

belboid said:


> or a rival wrestling federation (from the logo bottom left)



The logo is WWF, but thats the same thing as WWE. Because the WWF broke the terms of their naming/logo agreement with the World Wildlife Fund years ago, and ended up having to change their name to WWE instead.


----------



## xes (Mar 25, 2020)

don't spit on veg


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 25, 2020)




----------



## TopCat (Mar 25, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 203339


I like this. I think I have seen similar before.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 25, 2020)

TopCat said:


> I like this. I think I have seen similar before.


It's very old but rehashed is no harm.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Numbers (Mar 26, 2020)

xes said:


>



This is making me proper lol.


----------



## Anju (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 26, 2020)

The Times cartoon today.


----------



## rekil (Mar 26, 2020)

chilango said:


>



The numbers on this. According to his own twitter machine he's a bitcoin wanker whose bullshit startup failed.


----------



## hegley (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## DotCommunist (Mar 26, 2020)

fucking hell, I wake up to gwyneth paltrows _personal shama_n talking healing on the tele with Phil and Holly. A trio of dickheads, burn it all.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 26, 2020)

DotCommunist said:


> fucking hell, I wake up to gwyneth paltrows _personal shama_n talking healing on the tele with Phil and Holly. A trio of dickheads, burn it all.


The French Facebook groups are full of the "chloroquine conspiracy" - shades of Tesla's "free electricity" ...


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 26, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> The French Facebook groups are full of the "chloroquine conspiracy" - shades of Tesla's "free electricity" ...


Humans have previous experience of believing more in opinions than facts.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 26, 2020)

Shared on FB by my woo-merchant conspiraloon friend...


----------



## dessiato (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Mar 26, 2020)

About 6 posts up.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## mango5 (Mar 26, 2020)

A neighbour just reported receiving a WhatsApp message instructing them to "close all windows and doors by 11.30 pm as helicopters will be spraying disinfectant into the air"


----------



## petee (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 26, 2020)

Grandma knows best


----------



## killer b (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 26, 2020)

FridgeMagnet said:


>



been thinking about doing that with Ice T - Shut Up, Be Happy.


----------



## xes (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 26, 2020)

xes said:


> been thinking about doing that with Ice T - Shut Up, Be Happy.



Was just thinking something similar the other day.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 26, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 27, 2020)

Malgré le confinement, un couple contrôlé en pleins ébats sexuels dans une voiture près de Toulouse
					

Malgré les mesures de confinement, un couple de trentenaires s'est retrouvé dans un véhicule pour partager du bon temps sur une base de loisirs située à Muret, au sud de Toulouse. Ils pensaient être à l'abri des...




					www.ladepeche.fr
				




Fined 135 EU - It is not known what they had entered online as their reason for leaving the house ...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Mordi (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 27, 2020)

Blimey!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Lurdan (Mar 27, 2020)

Ummm, 'truth in advertising' and all that, but a picture of a toilet ???


----------



## sleaterkinney (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 27, 2020)

Alright own up which one of you did this?

danny la rouge ?


----------



## belboid (Mar 27, 2020)

spitfire said:


> Alright own up which one of you did this?
> 
> danny la rouge ?
> 
> View attachment 203607


First they voted for Corbyn and then...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Mar 27, 2020)

Van Gogh picture


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 27, 2020)

xes said:


> View attachment 203615


April Fool’s Day is going to be even shitter than usual


----------



## Badgers (Mar 27, 2020)

This made me feel so happy and so sad


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 27, 2020)

* cries * with happiness & sadness.


----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

Badgers said:


> This made me feel so happy and so sad


----------



## editor (Mar 27, 2020)

Slightly amusing distraction



































						I Used My Drone to Take Fun Portraits of People in Self-Isolation
					

Since we're all stuck inside and social distancing, I recently took out my drone and photographed people in their homes through their windows or on their




					petapixel.com


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## IC3D (Mar 27, 2020)

keybored said:


> View attachment 203617


Yea the good PPE and uniforms made hmm


----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

IC3D said:


> Yea the good PPE and uniforms made hmm


Found it, it's in Rotterdam.





__





						DPG Media Privacy Gate
					





					www.ad.nl


----------



## NoXion (Mar 27, 2020)

I've just run across some dangerous fucking moron on Facebook who claims that going out and about is safer than staying inside... more than a whiff of the conspiraloon about him, as he called me a sheep for pointing out that sunlight isn't strong enough to prevent the spread of this virus.

Could someone please hurry the fuck up and invent a machine that allows you to repeatedly punch Facebook conspiraloons in the balls? I would pay good money for it.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 27, 2020)

Poor thing


----------



## brogdale (Mar 27, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Poor thing



Brexit voters all thinking...I knew they was posh.


----------



## Badgers (Mar 27, 2020)

Poor thing


----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

NoXion said:


> I've just run across some dangerous fucking moron on Facebook who claims that going out and about is safer than staying inside... more than a whiff of the conspiraloon about him, as he called me a sheep for pointing out that sunlight isn't strong enough to prevent the spread of this virus.
> 
> Could someone please hurry the fuck up and invent a machine that allows you to repeatedly punch Facebook conspiraloons in the balls? I would pay good money for it.


Was this one of the "but ultraviolet light kills the virus" types?


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 27, 2020)

One of our neighbours was admitted to hospital with suspected Covid-19.
He was fitted with the new Dyson ventilator and it’s said he is picking up nicely!


----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Mar 27, 2020)

How to wash your hands 

Watch this chameleon wash its hands like a pro


----------



## Lurdan (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## NoXion (Mar 27, 2020)

keybored said:


> Was this one of the "but ultraviolet light kills the virus" types?



Yes. They also seemed to be under the impression that the virus can be spread from home to home on the breeze, simply because houses aren't airtight. In which case I did ask how the fuck going out and wandering around in that virus-infested air is more helpful than staying out of it.


----------



## belboid (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

belboid said:


> View attachment 203641


I must confess I stared at this for a good 20 seconds before realising it's probably not animated.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 27, 2020)

keybored said:


> I must confess I stared at this for a good 20 seconds before realising it's probably not animated.



Snoopy sticks his head out after 4 1/2 minutes


----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Snoopy sticks his head out after 4 1/2 minutes


Don't lie. It's going to be one of those scary faces leaping out with a massively loud scream coming from my speakers isn't it?


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 27, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Snoopy sticks his head out after 4 1/2 minutes


Checks image extension...  jpg


----------



## two sheds (Mar 27, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Checks image extension...  jpg


----------



## dessiato (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 27, 2020)

Anju said:


> View attachment 203657


Liked for the use of two yardsticks (or their metric equivalent) tied together.


----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Liked for the use of two yardsticks (or their metric equivalent) tied together.


And the sterile glove!


----------



## belboid (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Mar 27, 2020)

I quite like the way the dog does a quick tune up before the tiffany number


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 27, 2020)

spitfire said:


> Alright own up which one of you did this?
> 
> danny la rouge ?
> 
> View attachment 203607



It’s funny because it’s true


----------



## Petcha (Mar 27, 2020)

This bitch has some serious lungs


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Mar 27, 2020)

Petcha said:


> This bitch has some serious lungs




He's not actually in tune there


----------



## Petcha (Mar 27, 2020)

The dog or the dude?

The dog's nailed it.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Mar 27, 2020)

Petcha said:


> The dog or the dude?
> 
> The dog's nailed it.



Eric of course, dog's perfect.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 27, 2020)

What does a top sports reporter and commentator do when there's no sport?



This pretty much made my day.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 27, 2020)

I sent this to my mum for mothers day...


----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

Imagine my complete shock.


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 27, 2020)

Boris Johnson has been declared fit and well to work by Ian Duncan-Smith


----------



## Badgers (Mar 27, 2020)

keybored said:


> Imagine my complete shock.



Our (shared between 12 flats) food recycling bin is half full atm. That is at least 10 times the usual amount of food waste. 

I think it is a combination of the stockpiling cunts and more people not buying breakfast/lunch on commute or at office. Also more people/families at home so increased food waste as a result of more cooking. 

Shame but at least it is getting recycled here.


----------



## Marty1 (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Mar 27, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Boris Johnson has been declared fit and well to work by Ian Duncan-Smith



Must be dead then.


----------



## xes (Mar 27, 2020)

Who's got a guitar? This has been bouncing in my head today, full of schmaltzy goodness. Kind of filth that'll make you an instant internet star. You can have it for free. 

There’s a group of people who’ve we’ve taken granted of
When they deserve our undying gratitude, respect and love
Fighting a war for us in dustbin bags and rubber gloves
For the NHS stay home!

Chorus
  Glory, glory healthcare workers
  Sorry half the country’s bonkers
  Come on people don’t be plonkers
  For the NHS stay home!


The Tories cut the NHS can someone tell me why
They said it was austerity but that was just a lie
Tried to sell it down the river then they sold us all a line
For the NHS stay home! (and never vote Tory!)

Chorus

A healthcare workers wage is a part of our national shame
To say that they’re unskilled is diabolically insane
And if you voted Tory then you’ve no one else to blame
For the NHS stay home!

Chorus

They’ve asked us to do one thing so there’s one thing left to do
Sit back on your behind flick on the box and make a brew
And maybe buy your hospital a box of masks or 2
For the NHS stay home!

 Chorus


I'm very sorry.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 27, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Snoopy sticks his head out after 4 1/2 minutes



That's four and a half minutes of my life I won't get back you prick


----------



## Supine (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## Supine (Mar 27, 2020)

Just after Boris Johnson was diagnosed as positive Dom was seen running out of number 10. It didn't take long for this to happen


----------



## keybored (Mar 27, 2020)

Supine said:


> Just after Boris Johnson was diagnosed as positive Dom was seen running out of number 10. It didn't take long for this to happen



^There you go treelover




treelover said:


> waiting for the benny hill music next


----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 27, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


>



Possibly the third time this has been posted, but worth it every time.   Best I've seen so far.  Is she  a celeb/artist/presenter or something?


----------



## Supine (Mar 27, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 27, 2020)

Supine said:


>



She's already put her hands up to say it's a photoshop, but does it matter?


----------



## two sheds (Mar 27, 2020)

(((pissed load of elephants in a cornfield)))


----------



## A380 (Mar 28, 2020)

Proper Tidy said:


> That's four and a half minutes of my life I won't get back you prick



That was a typo, Snoopy pops out after 4 mins 45. You’d better watch it again...


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## dylanredefined (Mar 28, 2020)

magneze said:


> By April, only Altern-8 remain touring.
> 
> View attachment 201026


 Oh wow the old green NBC tops haven't seen one of those for years. Allways wondered why they became a fashion item.


----------



## snadge (Mar 28, 2020)

Thought this was parody but it's not........


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Supine (Mar 28, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> She's already put her hands up to say it's a photoshop, but does it matter?



I think we all have to accept that memes are not necessarily truth. Hopefully funny though


----------



## chainsawjob (Mar 28, 2020)

People with birthdays upcoming in April/May/(who knows how long  )...


----------



## existentialist (Mar 28, 2020)

A happy little ditty for you...


----------



## chainsawjob (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## cybershot (Mar 28, 2020)

Don’t think we’ve had this.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 28, 2020)

snadge said:


> Thought this was parody but it's not........



Fantastic lack of self-awareness, Air BnB hosts talking about unethical practices and the immoral letting down of society.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Mar 28, 2020)

I won't be sorry when the last page of this thread doesn't have that fucking great spider at the top of it.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Mar 28, 2020)

Petcha said:


> This bitch has some serious lungs



His neighbours are gonna love him by the end of this


----------



## killer b (Mar 28, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 203744


what's with the shit conspiracy theory?


----------



## A380 (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Mar 28, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> His neighbours are gonna love him by the end of this



Barrington can't quite hit the same notes but he gives a good crack


----------



## existentialist (Mar 28, 2020)

Lockdown day 5


----------



## existentialist (Mar 28, 2020)

. 

Bugger, I thought there were fewer per page...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 28, 2020)

snadge said:


> Thought this was parody but it's not........



Scarily reminiscent of unhinged & entitled little shit Elliot Rodger. I hope the feds are keeping a close eye on this guy before he goes on a spree.


----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Mar 28, 2020)

.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Supine (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## hash tag (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 28, 2020)

#makebritaindeadagain


----------



## dessiato (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Mar 28, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 203801
> View attachment 203802
> 
> #makebritaindeadagain


a 'soros migrant'??  fucking hell....


----------



## Teaboy (Mar 28, 2020)

What's a soros migrant?

I am fully aware the answer is going to be far right unpleasantness.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 28, 2020)

Don't forget to put your clocks forward tonight.

4 months should do it.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## circleline (Mar 28, 2020)

Lol...Bono 😁😁


----------



## A380 (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## Epona (Mar 28, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 203835



I've seen a few of these photos and I call bullshit, all of that stuff looks absolutely fine and anyone throwing it out is either a) an idiot or b) wanting to take photos of it to make some sort of point.


----------



## Thora (Mar 28, 2020)

Epona said:


> I've seen a few of these photos and I call bullshit, all of that stuff looks absolutely fine and anyone throwing it out is either a) an idiot or b) wanting to take photos of it to make some sort of point.


I don't know how accurate this is of course, but I have read that lots of bin photos were taken around university campuses that were shut down/students left suddenly - so either the students or the cleaners/landlords just emptied their fridges.


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 28, 2020)

Epona said:


> I've seen a few of these photos and I call bullshit, all of that stuff looks absolutely fine and anyone throwing it out is either a) an idiot or b) wanting to take photos of it to make some sort of point.


It's the spuds that gives it away - bread? possibly out of date.  Potatoes, though?


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 28, 2020)

Thora said:


> I don't know how accurate this is of course, but I have read that lots of bin photos were taken around university campuses that were shut down/students left suddenly - so either the students or the cleaners/landlords just emptied their fridges.


My daughter brought her entire stocks of everything home, inc. bog roll  

(oh, ok, she has a car.  it wouldn't have worked by train or bus)


----------



## Epona (Mar 28, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> It's the spuds that gives it away - bread? possibly out of date.  Potatoes, though?



All the veg looks better than what is in my local shops most of the time


----------



## Epona (Mar 28, 2020)

Thora said:


> I don't know how accurate this is of course, but I have read that lots of bin photos were taken around university campuses that were shut down/students left suddenly - so either the students or the cleaners/landlords just emptied their fridges.



The other thing is that a lot of restaurants had perishable stock left over when the lockdown hit - staff were in a lot of places allowed to take some home, but a lot of stock still got thrown away in a bit of a hurry


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 28, 2020)

Epona said:


> The other thing is that a lot of restaurants had perishable stock left over when the lockdown hit - staff were in a lot of places allowed to take some home, but a lot of stock still got thrown away in a bit of a hurry


There were a lot who gave their unused stock to foodbanks/soup kitchens though.  Or sold it at the door.


----------



## Epona (Mar 28, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> There were a lot who gave their unused stock to foodbanks/soup kitchens though.  Or sold it at the door.



Yes I am aware of a lot that were able to donate items


----------



## hash tag (Mar 28, 2020)

Large junk food places like macs must have had thousands of eggs and rolls n stuff that they no longer needed


----------



## circleline (Mar 28, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Large junk food places like macs must have had thousands of eggs and rolls n stuff that they no longer needed



Daughter 'made' me got to drive-thru macs for breakfast on their last opening day.  Sat in the car in the queue only to be told that it was 'main menu' only - no breakfast...  Assumed they were using up certain stuffs to consolidate profits, or something..


----------



## keybored (Mar 28, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> It's the spuds that gives it away - bread? possibly out of date.  Potatoes, though?


Those bananas look positively green come to think of it.


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 28, 2020)

keybored said:


> Those bananas look positively green come to think of it.


Possibly the "students clearing off home in a hurry" thing is an explanation, but I like to think that even if she did have to get the train back,  my daughter  and her mates would have taken the trouble to get food to a food bank/night shelter.  Kids these days are fairly clued up and ethical.  

But as Epona said, it's bullshit.


----------



## xes (Mar 28, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Mar 28, 2020)

xes said:


>


Sorry, all the supermarkets are out of fava beans. All beans, in fact.


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 28, 2020)

keybored said:


> Sorry, all the supermarkets are out of fava beans. All beans, in fact.


we got four tins of kidney beans this evening!  Four tins!  That's two chilli con carnes (we have lots of rice)


----------



## keybored (Mar 29, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> we got four tins of kidney beans this evening!  Four tins!  That's two chilli con carnes (we have lots of rice)


You jammy bastard. I made a huge chilli a couple of weeks ago when the panic buying was just starting and couldn't find a single tin. Ended up with 2 tins of black-eyed beans and 2 tins of some other bean I'd never heard of (borlotti). Turned out ok, made about 20 portions.


----------



## Epona (Mar 29, 2020)

keybored said:


> You jammy bastard. I made a huge chilli a couple of weeks ago when the panic buying was just starting and couldn't find a single tin. Ended up with 2 tins of black-eyed beans and 2 tins of some other bean I'd never heard of (borlotti). Turned out ok, made about 20 portions.


Borlotti beans are particularly nice with sausages, think a sort of north Italian version of cassoulet...


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 29, 2020)

keybored said:


> You jammy bastard. I made a huge chilli a couple of weeks ago when the panic buying was just starting and couldn't find a single tin. Ended up with 2 tins of black-eyed beans and 2 tins of some other bean I'd never heard of (borlotti). Turned out ok, made about 20 portions.


We have a big bag of "Black Turtle Beans" that mrs mx picked up last weekend when she popped back to Hayes to look after her parents.  Yep, they work just as well (soak first etc)


----------



## petee (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## petee (Mar 29, 2020)

someone must be tapping on that little can of friskies ...


----------



## Badgers (Mar 29, 2020)

hash tag said:


> Large junk food places like macs must have had thousands of eggs and rolls n stuff that they no longer needed


They did and still donating all food to various causes.


----------



## chainsawjob (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Mar 29, 2020)

Entertainers getting prosperity?  Maybe the 0.01% at the top of the tree.  But not the 99.99% who were struggling anyway and have now seen all their income disappear but not their overheads.


----------



## dessiato (Mar 29, 2020)

<span style='color:#780948'>ARCHIVED</span> - Madrid lockdown breaker fined for claiming to be hunting Pokemons in the street
					

<span Style='color:#780948'>archived</span> - Madrid Lockdown Breaker Fined For Claiming To Be Hunting Pokemons In The Street Keep up with the Latest News In English Murcia Costa Calida Spain




					murciatoday.com
				




First half of the article.

It has now been explicitly stated that you cannot hunt Pokemons during the lockdown.


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 29, 2020)

I've mention this before, finally it's on youtube.

Sound NSFW.


----------



## Steel Icarus (Mar 29, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 203879


Didn't realise Whitty was a member of the government.


----------



## keybored (Mar 29, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> NSFW


Ummm...


----------



## Aladdin (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Mar 29, 2020)

My local bus stop.


----------



## frogwoman (Mar 29, 2020)

This is great


----------



## gosub (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 29, 2020)

__





						Public Information Films | 1945 to 1951 | Film index | Coughs and Sneezes
					

For the first time view complete Public Information  films on the National Archives website, featuring a selection some  of the most memorable and influential Central Office of Information films from  the last 60 years to celebrate the 60th Aniversary of the COI.



					www.nationalarchives.gov.uk


----------



## MrSki (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## dylanredefined (Mar 29, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> What's a soros migrant?
> 
> I am fully aware the answer is going to be far right unpleasantness.



 You know a radical Muslim terrorist being paid thousands to emigrate to europe then the UK steal your job and live a life of luxury on benefits  by the ex Nazi Jewish mastermind George Soros .


----------



## xes (Mar 29, 2020)

dylanredefined said:


> You know a radical Muslim terrorist being paid thousands to emigrate to europe then the UK steal your job and live a life of luxury on benefits  by the ex Nazi Jewish mastermind George Soros .


See Teaboy, you were wrong, nothing dumbasatrumpsupporter about all that


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## Mumbles274 (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## Kaka Tim (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 29, 2020)

Meanwhile, in Belgium:









						Belgium Health Minister puts ban on non-essential sexual activities of persons 3 or greater in indoor areas
					

Belgium Health Minister Maggie de Block has put a ban on all non-essential sexual activities of persons 3 or greater in indoor areas. Health Minister de Block announced today that, effective immediately, “non-essential” sexual activities of 3 people or more are banned in Belgium to combat the sprea



					worldnewsdailyreport.com
				




(Probably not true...)


----------



## blairsh (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Mar 29, 2020)

Not normally what I'd share but this is joyous.


----------



## xes (Mar 29, 2020)

blairsh said:


> View attachment 203972


Literally what I've been doing today


----------



## MrSki (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## editor (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 29, 2020)

A380 said:


> Meanwhile, in Belgium:
> 
> 
> 
> ...




  Same website as batboy...

after checking, now I'm not sure. But it's still definitely a parody site.


----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 29, 2020)

"A 2018 survey revealed that more than 78% of Belgian couples openly practice wife swapping, a cultural trait that became common practice in the 19th century under the rule of King Leopold II."


----------



## little_legs (Mar 29, 2020)

One of the Fox anchors did her last night’s show while shit faced.


----------



## keybored (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 29, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 30, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 204013



That was basically the Amazon coronavirus debrief to delivery drivers.

We now get free disposable gloves though.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 30, 2020)

Saunders sorry for domestic abuse 'advice'
					

World champion Billy Joe Saunders apologises after posting a video in which he tells men how to hit their female partners during the coronavirus lockdown.




					www.bbc.co.uk
				




Not sure where to put this, but some arsewipe I'm glad I've never heard of giving sensitive male advice during coronavirus.


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Proper Tidy (Mar 30, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Saunders sorry for domestic abuse 'advice'
> 
> 
> World champion Billy Joe Saunders apologises after posting a video in which he tells men how to hit their female partners during the coronavirus lockdown.
> ...



He's always been a horrible prick him. Hates women.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 30, 2020)

This is me & my mother.


----------



## Idris2002 (Mar 30, 2020)

dylanredefined said:


> You know a radical Muslim terrorist being paid thousands to emigrate to europe then the UK steal your job and live a life of luxury on benefits  by the ex Nazi Jewish mastermind George Soros .


Dr. Soros was very good to me.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## prunus (Mar 30, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 204033



Reno? Seems unlikely, with the current situation


----------



## blairsh (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Mar 30, 2020)

Just received this from my mate. Sadly I do not know who the artist is.


----------



## spitfire (Mar 30, 2020)

Moar here: 

gosub kindly found the original and posted elsewhere.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Mordi (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 30, 2020)

Entire Brooklyn neighbourhood sings Juicy by Biggie during coronavirus lockdown


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Mar 30, 2020)

South Shields v North Shields - Isolation Disco


----------



## T & P (Mar 30, 2020)

This has made my day  . Though credit where it's due for trying to do a good thing anyway...

*'Virus-fighting' scientist gets magnets stuck in nose









						'Virus-fighting' scientist gets magnets stuck in nose
					

The astrophysicist was trying to create a necklace which would stop people touching their faces.




					www.bbc.co.uk
				



*


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 30, 2020)

T & P said:


> This has made my day  . Though credit where it's due for trying to do a good thing anyway...
> 
> *'Virus-fighting' scientist gets magnets stuck in nose
> 
> ...






> It was at this point he realised he would have to make a trip to his local hospital in Melbourne - the same hospital his partner works at.
> 
> "They thought it was great, particularly the doctors that know my partner," he said. "They came past to have a laugh and ask 'why were you putting magnets in your nose?!'"


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 30, 2020)

Apparently a patient on one of the prototype Dyson ventilators is said to be 'picking-up nicely'.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)

The twat.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)

Another Minister today following Government advice about touching your face.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 30, 2020)

Don't forget to join the 'Applause for delivery drivers' tomorrow... Sometime between 9am and 6pm.


----------



## fishfinger (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## xes (Mar 30, 2020)

Nothing like a bit of indoor dogging.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 30, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 204033


Erewhon? Cool!


----------



## existentialist (Mar 30, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> Entire Brooklyn neighbourhood sings Juicy by Biggie during coronavirus lockdown



That was chanting, not singing.

Just to be sure about this.


----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Mar 30, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 30, 2020)

doing the rounds in SE London...


----------



## MrSki (Mar 31, 2020)

Total respect for those who work in shops that are still open. Minimum wage or not much above & daily interaction with 'the herd' & no PPE.


----------



## gosub (Mar 31, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Total respect for those who work in shops that are still open. Minimum wage or not much above & daily interaction with 'the herd' & no PPE.



What a bunch of wankers.  What exactly have the spandex wearing twats on the left actually done?


----------



## petee (Mar 31, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Total respect for those who work in shops that are still open. Minimum wage or not much above & daily interaction with 'the herd' & no PPE.



hear hear. I've been thanking open businesses for being open and throwing tips in places i normally wouldn't.

/my little bit to help


----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## iona (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Mar 31, 2020)

Coronavirus: Goats take over empty streets of seaside town
					

With people staying inside because of coronavirus, the animals are providing "free entertainment".



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## Badgers (Mar 31, 2020)

A normal year:

January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December

2020:

January, February, March, March, March, March, Still March, March, March, How is it still March, March


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 31, 2020)

Wonderful story


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 31, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


>




Reminds me of when I was at primary school and there was always some girl in a corridor tunelessly playing one of these annoying things


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 31, 2020)

Might have been posted before, but Sam Neill is continuing to be great. If you've ever had a hankering to hear him play Radiohead's Creep on a ukelele (?) now's yer chance.


----------



## chainsawjob (Mar 31, 2020)

Romford


----------



## chainsawjob (Mar 31, 2020)

ONE HUNDRED THINGS TO DO INSIDE THIS WEEKEND

1. Say “hasta la vista, baby” whilst closing every work-related tab on your computer

2. Try to find yourself on Google Earth

3. Tighten the screws on your saucepan handles
4. Organise your computer desktop so it’s all neat and tidy and you no longer know where anything is
5. Clean the kitchen
6. Rank every crisp flavour in order from best to worst
7. Come up with a new signature
8. Download TikTok
9. Spend fifteen seconds on TikTok
10. Decide that’s enough TikTok for one day
11. Clean the kitchen again
12. Rank every chocolate bar in order from best to worst
13. Use the nutritional information on your canned goods as a makeshift version of top trumps
14. Watch a marble race on Youtube
15. Get far too into marble racing
16. Decide you’re going to have your own marble race
17. Realise you don’t own any marbles
18. Put your marble-based dreams on the backburner for now
19. Watch a years worth of Netflix in an afternoon
20. Avoid eye contact with all the books you own but have never read
21. Rank every biscuit in order from best to rich tea
22. Resist the urge to cut your own hair
23. Figure out what your three wishes would be, in case you ever come into possession of a magic lamp, fish, or monkey paw
24. Learn your debit card number off by heart like a Jedi or something
25. Clean the kitchen for a third time
26. Play Scrabble
27. Pull out two Qs and no Us
28. Argue about whether “Qi” is a word
29. Put Scrabble away
30. Spend fifteen minutes looking at pictures of quokkas on the internet
31. Decide you’re going to have an early night
32. Spend two hours in bed on your phone
33. Go to sleep
34. Wake up
35. Decide you’re going to have a productive day
36. Spend two hours in bed on your phone
37. Have a sitdown shower because you’re an adult and you can do what you want
38. Use a 48-pack of Weetabix as a makeshift Jenga set
39. Spend fifteen minutes hoovering up crumbs of wheat
40. Research who would win in a race between a zebra and an ostrich
41. Check the news
42. Quickly close the news
43. Give the kitchen a once over
44. Brush up on either the history of the Roman Empire, or the history of tomato ketchup, depending on what sort of a mood you’re in
45. See what’s happening on Instagram stories
46. Is anyone NOT doing online yoga?
47. Research home workouts
48. Instantly feel exhausted
49. Call your parents
50. Call your best friends parents, see how they’re getting on
51. Facetime someone with a dog
52. You know what, that quick once over really wasn’t enough, give the kitchen a proper clean
53. Look around your kitchen and decide which of your friends would be what household appliances
54. Ponder who invented the coat hanger
55. Learn to spell onomateopia
56. Play Rock Paper Scissors over Skype, first to 500 wins
57. Search “two dogs dressed as one dog carrying a present”
58. Attempt to clean your oven
59. Realise you’re in way over your head here
60. Have a picnic in your lounge
61. Enjoy the pleasant lack of wasps
62. Try Scrabble again
63. Pull out two Qs again
64. Decide Scrabble can self-isolate itself at the back of the cupboard
65. Give your kitchen a deep clean
66. See what’s happening on Instagram Stories
67. Is anyone NOT making their own sourdough?
68. Research how to make sourdough
69. Decide that quarantine or no quarantine, you do not have the time or patience to make sourdough
70. Tidy up all the tangled cables behind your TV
71. Put on your shoes, just to remember how it feels
72. Go through your phone contacts and guess whether each person keeps their ketchup in the fridge or cupboard
73. Try to figure out how many seconds you’ve been alive for, without using a calculator
74. Choose which knife, fork and spoon are your favourite
75. Choose which are your least favourite
76. Make up mean names for them
77. Think about doing the ironing
78. Decide against doing the ironing
79. Crave ice cream
80. Check your freezer - no ice cream
81. Really crave ice cream
82. Check your freezer - still no ice cream
83. Debate whether going to the shops for ice cream counts as “essential travel”
84. Reluctantly accept that it definitely doesn’t
85. Check your freezer again - just in case
86. Research how to do that magic trick where you whip the tablecloth out from under everything
87. Attempt that magic trick
88. Spend fifteen minutes cleaning up broken glass
89. Make a drawing for a friend using MS Paint
90. Clean your kitchen, but this really is the last time now
91. Casually check your fridge every forty five minutes, on the off chance the contents has changed
92. Watch a Youtube tutorial on folding fitted sheets
93. Try to fold a fitted sheet
94. Fail
95. Decide that if you’ve made it this far without learning to fold fitted sheets, your fitted sheets can jolly well go unfolded
96. Read a needlessly long Facebook post because you’ve got nothing better to do
97. Start dusting your skirting boards
98. Remember this is a marathon not a sprint and you’re going to need to save some fun for next weekend
99. Realise you haven’t cleaned the kitchen in a while
100. Clean the kitchen


----------



## belboid (Mar 31, 2020)

Shouldn't be playing Scrabble if you haven't learned all the non-u Q words!  Qi is definitely in there.


----------



## existentialist (Mar 31, 2020)

Petcha said:


>



There's some quite entertainingly snarky responses to that, around the idea that an actor who plays an epidemiologist is giving advice on preventing pandemics...

Me - I think she's got a point, and it's a simple enough message. It's not like she's claiming some arcane level of scientific knowledge.


----------



## Anju (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## Lucy Fur (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (Mar 31, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> ONE HUNDRED THINGS TO DO INSIDE THIS WEEKEND
> 
> 1. Say “hasta la vista, baby” whilst closing every work-related tab on your computer
> 
> ...



Shoudn't it be a 101 things, for..

101 ONE HUNDRED THINGS TO DO INSIDE NEXT WEEKEND


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 31, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> 21. Rank every biscuit in order from best to rich tea


That's true - there are biscuits and there are cardboard biscuits like rich teas.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Mar 31, 2020)

Feel slightly guilty now for complaining loudly about our neighbour for having builders over to do his roof (and coming into our garden to get something) as it turns out his roof was leaking!


----------



## two sheds (Mar 31, 2020)

They could have told you though, if they'd have done that you wouldn't have complained so loudly


----------



## Saul Goodman (Mar 31, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> That's true - there are biscuits and there are cardboard biscuits like rich teas.


Rich tea are one of the nicest biscuits, with coffee. And, ironically, morning coffee are one of the best biscuits for tea.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 31, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Rich tea are one of the nicest biscuits, with coffee. And, ironically, morning coffee are one of the best biscuits for tea.


What on earth is wrong with you man? Go to the taste bud clinic as you clearly need to.


----------



## bellaozzydog (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## donkyboy (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Mar 31, 2020)

Think lockdown's getting to me - this actually made me cry!


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 31, 2020)

Nothing to do with corona virus aside from the fact I was fed up watching the graphs and numbers ,it made me laugh and I couldn't think of anywhere else to post it


----------



## Thora (Mar 31, 2020)

hegley said:


> Think lockdown's getting to me - this actually made me cry!



That was pretty adorable


----------



## xes (Mar 31, 2020)

Thora said:


> That was pretty adorable


I made it to 25 seconds. Then I was sick in my mouth.


----------



## Serge Forward (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Mar 31, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Apr 1, 2020)

hegley said:


> Think lockdown's getting to me - this actually made me cry!





I pity their neighbours


----------



## Aladdin (Apr 1, 2020)

Had to laugh. Leo has a Mr Men Mr Taoiseach mug 😁


----------



## Yossarian (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Mumbles274 (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## souljacker (Apr 1, 2020)

It's all going to be fine


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Apr 1, 2020)

hegley said:


> Think lockdown's getting to me - this actually made me cry!




Guardian cropped the argument at the beginning for some reason, which they intentionally left in:


----------



## existentialist (Apr 1, 2020)

platinumsage said:


> Guardian cropped the argument at the beginning for some reason, which they intentionally left in:



I *thought* there was a bit of a tense vibe in the Guardian video.

I found myself not liking the dad much.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 1, 2020)

Telegraph's cartoon today...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## strung out (Apr 1, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I found myself not liking the dad much.


What a weird thing to get from that video


----------



## existentialist (Apr 1, 2020)

strung out said:


> What a weird thing to get from that video


_shrug_


----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Mordi (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## krtek a houby (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Apr 1, 2020)

Not sure why this won't embed but it works if you click  this link

It's "Michael Spicer: The Room Next Door - President Trump feat. Boris Johnson"


----------



## quiet guy (Apr 1, 2020)

Samuel L Jackson reminding everyone to Stay the F**k at home


----------



## dessiato (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## JuanTwoThree (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Apr 1, 2020)

Definitely starting to feel like this.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 1, 2020)

Anju said:


> Definitely starting to feel like this.
> View attachment 204389


I have to check each morning to work out whether I need to get the work laptop out.


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 1, 2020)

editor said:


>




I saw someone out walking in a full fancy dress T-Rex outfit today.  It was quite surreal.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 1, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> I saw someone out walking in a full fancy dress T-Rex outfit today.  It was quite surreal.



Was you on shrooms or acid?


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 1, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Was you on shrooms or acid?



It was identical to this one.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Kaka Tim (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 1, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 2, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> View attachment 204424


----------



## editor (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## bellaozzydog (Apr 2, 2020)

existentialist said:


> _shrug_



Stealing that as my response to almost everything on the interweb


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 2, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 204441



He is just LARPing as a beholder


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 2, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 204441


We could ask Saul Goodman to 3D print coronavirus hats for us all.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 2, 2020)

"Bedtime."


----------



## dessiato (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Apr 2, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 204441



Is that real or an April Fools? It's getting harder and harder to tell.


----------



## Kaka Tim (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)

Petcha said:


> Is that real or an April Fools? It's getting harder and harder to tell.



Real, it was reported days ago.









						Policeman wears coronavirus helmet to warn people to stay home
					

He said children are frightened by it and ask to be taken home.




					metro.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## hash tag (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## JuanTwoThree (Apr 2, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 204481



Do I understand this? Yes and no


----------



## hegley (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## ska invita (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Lurdan (Apr 2, 2020)

Private Eye


----------



## editor (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 2, 2020)

Anju said:


> .


I spotted the French version earlier


----------



## editor (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## HalloweenJack (Apr 2, 2020)

Moor bad news...


----------



## editor (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 2, 2020)

Traditionally a lot of Portyguese come to the Algarve at Easter, some to see families some as tourists. The Police will have checks on the motorways to deter them . If they get there they'll see this sign blocking pavement from municipal council of Olhão, a town in the Algarve. 
"Move away a bit... just a bit more... a bit more... keep moving away... that's it! Keep moving away... When you get home, that's good!"


----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## killer b (Apr 2, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Apr 2, 2020)

The new Trumpist coronavirus talking point is that the death count is “inflated”
					






					www.mediamatters.org
				






> As the death toll from the novel coronavirus that causes COVID-19 soars in the U.S. and statistical models predict more than 100,000 to come, conservative media personalities are pushing the ghoulish argument that the fatality statistics are “inflated” because they count people who died with the disease but also had underlying conditions. This is the next frontier in the right's effort to downplay the effect of the coronavirus in order to defend President Donald Trump.


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 2, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> View attachment 204581



The lettuce face mask is genius and may moisturise your face too.


----------



## spring-peeper (Apr 3, 2020)

This is concerning Trump when he made a big announcement that he would allow the cruise ships to dock and let the Canadians return home.  Mighty big of him.

Canada's response:


----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 3, 2020)

Probably already posted...


----------



## dessiato (Apr 3, 2020)

Fury As Farage Accepts Job In Spain - Costa Del Sol Update
					

Fury As Farage Accepts Job In Spain.  The Spanish government has controversially employed Nigel Farage to assist in their efforts to enforce the national lockdown.




					costadelsolupdate.com


----------



## platinumsage (Apr 3, 2020)

Not a meme but I thought it amusing

Despite a national emergency, the Nightingale hospital still needs planning permission - Newham Council are currently are inviting comments on the "Temporary change of use of the existing building from an exhibition centre and associated uses to a field hospital".

The application contains a Sustainability, Energy and Infrastructure Statement setting out how the proposed development has measurable outcomes under the UN Sustainable Development Goals. The two identified include "Good Health & Wellbeing" and "Responsible Consumption and Production".

Anyone who thinks the application should be denied has until the 22nd of April to submit an objection.


----------



## xes (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## blairsh (Apr 3, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> View attachment 204630


Milena? Is that you?


----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## DotCommunist (Apr 3, 2020)

have we had Cube's quarantine version of 'today was a good day' yet?


----------



## quiet guy (Apr 3, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Fury As Farage Accepts Job In Spain - Costa Del Sol Update
> 
> 
> Fury As Farage Accepts Job In Spain.  The Spanish government has controversially employed Nigel Farage to assist in their efforts to enforce the national lockdown.
> ...


Are they using his mug as a deterrent?  "If you go out you will end up looking like this."


----------



## dessiato (Apr 3, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Are they using his mug as a deterrent?  "If you go out you will end up looking like this."


Read the article it’s explained there.


----------



## quiet guy (Apr 3, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Read the article it’s explained there.


 Doh.


----------



## editor (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## cybershot (Apr 3, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 204696


I thought everyone was pissed by about 3:30pm at the moment?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 3, 2020)

cybershot said:


> I thought everyone was pissed by about 3:30pm at the moment?



I am 20 minutes early, hic.


----------



## danski (Apr 3, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 204696


Looks like a half to me


----------



## danski (Apr 3, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I am 20 minutes early, hic.


Oh, I’ve been deliberately hanging back. Spose it is Friday. Chin chin.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 3, 2020)

danski said:


> Oh, I’ve been deliberately hanging back. Spose it is Friday. Chin chin.



I woke up thinking it was Saturday, took about 3 or 4 hours until I realised my mistake!


----------



## two sheds (Apr 3, 2020)

"Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so"


----------



## krtek a houby (Apr 3, 2020)

two sheds said:


> "Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so"



Douglas Adams?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 3, 2020)

Likewise..."Work is the curse of the drinking classes".


----------



## two sheds (Apr 3, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Douglas Adams?



yep. 

I'm sure it's been referred to before but this comes to mind too: 



> These tales of impending doom allowed the Golgafrinchans to rid themselves of an entire useless third of their population. The story was that they would build three Ark ships. Into the A ship would go all the leaders, scientists and other high achievers. The C ship would contain all the people who made things and did things, and the B Ark would hold everyone else, such as hairdressers and telephone sanitisers. They sent the B ship off first, but of course, the other two-thirds of the population stayed on the planet and lived full, rich and happy lives until they were all wiped out by a virulent disease contracted from a dirty telephone.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 3, 2020)

cybershot said:


> I thought everyone was pissed by about 3:30pm at the moment?


ah shit im late, even got some ice to celebrate Fridays vodka and coke, which i dont ever drink


----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Apr 3, 2020)

belboid said:


>



I've just sent that to the manager I'm working for at the moment who has been talking about conspiracy theories all day.


----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 3, 2020)

Hancock just opened a fucking HOSPITAL while obviously sick ...


----------



## dessiato (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 3, 2020)

From a friend in US


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 3, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Hancock just opened a fucking HOSPITAL while obviously sick ...
> View attachment 204706


He looked and sounded a bit rough at the press conference yesterday.


----------



## Epona (Apr 3, 2020)

Fantastic - Burberry are making hospital gowns, please please please let someone make an image of this...


----------



## Kaka Tim (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 3, 2020)

hegley said:


> Think lockdown's getting to me - this actually made me cry!



That's superb


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 3, 2020)

Epona said:


> Fantastic - Burberry are making hospital gowns, please please please let someone make an image of this...


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 3, 2020)

And the Rodneys are queuing up
God forbid
And they all want to win the cup
God forbid 









						Not going coronavirus outbreak alone: Some find quarantine buddies to lessen isolation
					

As Californians are ordered to stay at home to decrease coronavirus spread, some are making pacts with small groups of friends.




					www.latimes.com


----------



## Lurdan (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 3, 2020)

Oh, I see they're doing masks, too!


----------



## MrSki (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 3, 2020)

blairsh said:


> Milena? Is that you?


I think she's Slovenian.


----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Apr 3, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 4, 2020)

.


----------



## dessiato (Apr 4, 2020)

I think it is actually the French in Algeria, and wandering not wondering, but the sentiment remains.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 4, 2020)

Just got back from my local Tesco. I saw a bloke buying 4 crates of San Miguel, 5 paella’s and 3 sombreros. I thought to myself...
Hispanic buying.


----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 4, 2020)

View attachment 204854View attachment 204854


----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 4, 2020)

*Coronavirus: Birmingham and Merseyside masts set on fire over false 5G claims *









						Mast fire probe amid 5G coronavirus claims
					

There have been fires at masts in Birmingham, Liverpool and Melling in Merseyside.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)

At least with humans off the streets, the Daleks will be able on focus on exterminating the fucking seagulls.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 4, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


>



I can't really make out what he's saying but it's bloody funny


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 4, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> View attachment 204916




Is thinking your avatar was an emu along similar lines?


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## killer b (Apr 4, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


>



just a heads-up that the account you've shared that from is a far-right troll.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Apr 4, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> View attachment 204914


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)

We are going to need this...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 4, 2020)

killer b said:


> just a heads-up that the account you've shared that from is a far-right troll.


It's been repeatedly posted on twitter and was a random selection.  But have edited to quote another account.  Grateful if you could edit your original quote.


----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## smmudge (Apr 4, 2020)

I don't get it, 1 to 4g was fine, but suddenly 5g is the end of the world?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)

smmudge said:


> I don't get it, 1 to 4g was fine, but suddenly 5g is the end of the world?



No, there were nutters banging about at least 3G & 4G, before moving onto 5G.


----------



## xes (Apr 4, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> No, there were nutters banging about at least 3G & 4G, before moving onto 5G.


and every technological advancement before, and after...


----------



## MrSki (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 4, 2020)

Think the matrix has a bad glitch.


----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 4, 2020)

CDC website 





__





						This Page Is No Longer AvailableCDC
					

This Page Is No Longer Available




					www.cdc.gov


----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 4, 2020)

Is this correct?



> *The United States is not currently experiencing an influenza pandemic.*
> 
> It is impossible to predict when the next pandemic will occur or its impact. There are ongoing efforts by the Federal Government to monitor and assess pandemic threats and prepare for an influenza pandemic.
> 
> ...







__





						Current Situation  | Pandemic Influenza (Flu) | CDC
					

Everything you need to know about the flu illness, including symptoms, treatment and prevention.




					www.cdc.gov


----------



## frogwoman (Apr 4, 2020)

Well Corona isn't flu so technically yes


----------



## MrSki (Apr 4, 2020)




----------



## little_legs (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Apr 5, 2020)

on a similar note -


----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Apr 5, 2020)

<attachment webkitattachmentid="0b4763b9-4057-43ca-9e68-22f9697ec32d" src="cid:BBC0513C-9BA4-4518-AB34-A20F7AEC1550" title="VIDEO-2020-04-05-12-22-34.mp4" type="public.mpeg-4" subtitle="1.1 MB" style="font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; font-size: 17px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: auto; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.301961); -webkit-text-size-adjust: none; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration: none;"></attachment>


----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 5, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 205036


It would be funnier without the middle bit overexplaining the punchline. It takes away the impact of the joke.


----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Apr 5, 2020)

A380 said:


> <attachment webkitattachmentid="0b4763b9-4057-43ca-9e68-22f9697ec32d" src="cid:BBC0513C-9BA4-4518-AB34-A20F7AEC1550" title="VIDEO-2020-04-05-12-22-34.mp4" type="public.mpeg-4" subtitle="1.1 MB" style="font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; font-size: 17px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: auto; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.301961); -webkit-text-size-adjust: none; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration: none;"></attachment>


Pearoast.


----------



## Serge Forward (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Apr 5, 2020)

I dont know why but I can't stop giggling at this


----------



## Anju (Apr 5, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 5, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 205095


----------



## petee (Apr 5, 2020)

...


----------



## existentialist (Apr 5, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 205095


----------



## 2hats (Apr 5, 2020)

petee said:


> 2020, eh



There are typically several such fires each year in contaminated areas in/around the exclusion zone (almost always lightning initiated). This one has reportedly already been extinguished.


----------



## petee (Apr 5, 2020)

2hats said:


> There are typically several such fires each year in contaminated areas in/around the exclusion zone (almost always lightning initiated). This one has reportedly already been extinguished.



in that case, out of utter shame, i will remove the post.


----------



## keybored (Apr 5, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## petee (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## JimW (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## JuanTwoThree (Apr 6, 2020)

> <attachment webkitattachmentid="0b4763b9-4057-43ca-9e68-22f9697ec32d" src="cid:BBC0513C-9BA4-4518-AB34-A20F7AEC1550" title="VIDEO-2020-04-05-12-22-34.mp4" type="public.mpeg-4" subtitle="1.1 MB" style="font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; font-size: 17px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: auto; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.301961); -webkit-text-size-adjust: none; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration: none;"></attachment>





> be funnier without the middle bit overexplaining the punchline. It takes away the impact of the joke.


----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 6, 2020)

JuanTwoThree said:


> View attachment 205179
> 
> I thought the same


I know. “La”? What was I thinking?


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Apr 6, 2020)

danny la rouge Sorry, I've made a nonsense of your post with my edit.


----------



## danski (Apr 6, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


>



Lovely floor.


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Apr 6, 2020)

JuanTwoThree said:


> danny la rouge Sorry, I've made a nonsense of your post with my edit.



It was the juxaposition of the two posts, urban synchronicity style that I was going for


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 6, 2020)

Just arrived.
Will I RTS or keep it unopened for posterity ?


----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 6, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Just arrived.
> Will I RTS or keep it unopened for posterity ?
> 
> View attachment 205191


Yes.


----------



## Anju (Apr 6, 2020)

imposs1904 said:


> View attachment 205149



Is that the latest government PPE fuck up?


----------



## belboid (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 6, 2020)

Johnson attending hospital yesterday...


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 6, 2020)

Just saying


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Apr 6, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 205216


So who's that, then?


----------



## wayward bob (Apr 6, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Just arrived.
> Will I RTS or keep it unopened for posterity ?
> 
> View attachment 205191


you touched it?


----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 6, 2020)

wayward bob said:


> you touched it?


The postman chucked it at me from 2 metres away and I caught it, then gelled my hands.
I've now stuck it behind the gas meter where I previously stuck the last government missive of that ilk...

Having lost the contents, I've forgotten what that one was for ...


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## Mordi (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 6, 2020)




----------



## ska invita (Apr 6, 2020)

Mordi said:


>




blatantly unarguably IDM



dessiato said:


>


blatantly unarguably not Banksy

my smartarsery is done here


----------



## xes (Apr 6, 2020)

no fixing stupid.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 6, 2020)

xes said:


> no fixing stupid.




What a stupid fucking woman.


----------



## xes (Apr 6, 2020)

quite frustrating isn't she.

could have been worse...though he did have a knife so I think the mirror may have slightly mislead people on this one 








						Man refusing to wear facemask shot dead in Philippines after president's threat
					

A 63-year-old who began wielding a knife after officials told him to put on a facemask was shot dead in the Philippines, in the week following President Rodrigo Duterte's stark warning to those breaching lockdown measures




					www.mirror.co.uk


----------



## dessiato (Apr 6, 2020)

ska invita said:


> blatantly unarguably not Banksy


You are right. It is clearly not Banksy, but the message remains.


----------



## dessiato (Apr 6, 2020)

xes said:


> no fixing stupid.



Understand = stand under ffs


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 6, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Understand = stand under ffs


Freeman of the land speak. This person decided to waste everyone's time by spouting shite about their rights, and exercise not being defined under the law. Waste of oxygen.


----------



## Badgers (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 7, 2020)

xes said:


> quite frustrating isn't she.
> 
> could have been worse...though he did have a knife so I think the mirror may have slightly mislead people on this one
> 
> ...



Headline: He was shot after refusing to wear a facemask.
Subheadline: He "began wielding a knife after officials told him to put on a facemask."
Two-thirds of the way into the story: He "eventually attacked the personnel using a scythe."

Local report:  "Bagaipo said the suspect allegedly attempted to hack first barangay health worker Hazel Baguhin who managed to run, then turned his ire on barangay tanod Guzman Vallar who also  managed to escape. ... Bagaipo said a police intelligence operative from the Nasipit police station, identified as Staff Sgt, Rolly Llones, responded to the call for assistance. He said Llones went to the checkpoint and identified him as a policeman but this allegedly angered Dungog. Bagaipo narrated that Dungog tried to hack at Llones several times, prompting the policeman to draw his 9mm service pistol  and shot the victim who was killed immediately."


----------



## crossthebreeze (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 7, 2020)

Nice work


----------



## editor (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## petee (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 7, 2020)

And here's the Queen's speech in full...


----------



## wayward bob (Apr 7, 2020)

<goes to park and harrasses swans>


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Cadmus (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 7, 2020)

Has anyone else spotted this?


Proof it's all a conspiracy, wake-up sheeple!


----------



## frogwoman (Apr 7, 2020)

It's not good enough!


----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 7, 2020)

frogwoman said:


> It's not good enough!


0 points on the WCA - get back to work Boris! Stop skiving


----------



## belboid (Apr 7, 2020)

We wondered if he was taking the piss at first, but no....


----------



## MrSki (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Apr 7, 2020)

Man who thinks coronavirus is spread by 5G horrified to discover he's got a microwave oven
					

A man who claims that 5G broadcasts are causing the Coronavirus was shocked to discover he's had a microwave oven in his kitchen for the last 35 years, it has emerged.




					newsthump.com


----------



## platinumsage (Apr 7, 2020)

.


----------



## little_legs (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Apr 7, 2020)

Happy Pesach


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 7, 2020)

As if there isn't enough schadenfreude going around...











						Israel Health Minister Yaakov Litzman Tests Positive For COVID-19
					

Israel Health Minister Yaakov Litzman has tested positive for the coronavirus.




					www.patheos.com


----------



## two sheds (Apr 7, 2020)

Well that's outed _him_


----------



## Badgers (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## petee (Apr 7, 2020)

keybored said:


> As if there isn't enough schadenfreude going around...
> 
> View attachment 205401
> 
> ...



no excuse foe the guy, but this apparently is incorrect (see the comments in the link)


----------



## keybored (Apr 7, 2020)

petee said:


> no excuse foe the guy, but this apparently is incorrect (see the comments in the link)


Looks like it's a bit incorrect.









						‘Most homophobic’ minister in Israel, who thinks all LGBT+ people are sinners, tests positive for COVID-19
					

Yaakov Litzman, health minister for Israel who was once described as the country's "most homophobic minister", has tested positive for COVID-19.




					www.pinknews.co.uk


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 7, 2020)

Chuck Schumer.



Fail.


----------



## xes (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Lord Camomile (Apr 7, 2020)

Apologies if repotato, but this:




Led to this:


----------



## quiet guy (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 7, 2020)

Lord Camomile said:


> Apologies if repotato, but this:



not getting at you personally, but this annoys the hell out of me.

why the bloody fuck are NHS workers needing fucking charity to be fed at work?


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 7, 2020)

xes said:


>



That gives me an idea


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 7, 2020)

. cut and paste fail


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 7, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 7, 2020)

https://thedailyshunt.files.wordpress.com/2020/04/coldplaypolice.jpg?w=930&h=450&crop=1


----------



## keybored (Apr 7, 2020)

xes said:


>



Stop spreading this fake news. He's alive and well, in good spirits and having a laugh with his pals. Pic is proof.


----------



## petee (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Apr 8, 2020)

We all need that service.


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## bellaozzydog (Apr 8, 2020)

A very British burn


----------



## brogdale (Apr 8, 2020)

Not really a meme...but have we had this yet?


----------



## two sheds (Apr 8, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Not really a meme...but have we had this yet?
> 
> View attachment 205470


They withdrew it apparently  . They've said he was a homophobe but it was a different homophobe who made that claim (from the Facebook thread it was on before).


----------



## keybored (Apr 8, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Not really a meme...but have we had this yet?
> 
> View attachment 205470


Good to know we're on the same page with this.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 8, 2020)

it looks like they took up gymnastics instead of power lifting.


----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 8, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


>


FFY.


----------



## MrSki (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 8, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> FFY.


Ah well, each to their own 🤷


----------



## editor (Apr 8, 2020)

I think any of these graphs prove the 5G/virus connection beyond any reasonable doubt. 









						Spurious correlations
					






					www.tylervigen.com


----------



## Clair De Lune (Apr 8, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> Ah well, each to their own 🤷


I thought your post was lovely and I forwarded it to my less cynical 'dead inside'  friends...even though I sometimes join them in that domain


----------



## editor (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 8, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> I thought your post was lovely and I forwarded it to my less cynical 'dead inside'  friends...even though I sometimes join them in that domain


Thanks, yeah same here, depends which day you catch me on


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 8, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> FFY.


Not quite as eloquent 😆


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Apr 8, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> View attachment 205539


"oi sunshine, what do you think you're doing standing there reading that, thirty quid fine now fuck off"


----------



## Clair De Lune (Apr 8, 2020)

I cautiously paused to capture my mud sodden foot earlier


----------



## existentialist (Apr 8, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> I cautiously paused to capture my mud sodden foot earlier View attachment 205584


"You put your right foot in, you take your right foot out..."


----------



## Clair De Lune (Apr 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> "You put your right foot in, you take your right foot out..."


Twat


----------



## existentialist (Apr 8, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> Twat


But I bet you shook it all about


----------



## Clair De Lune (Apr 8, 2020)

No I turned around...every now and then I get a little bit lonely..


----------



## two sheds (Apr 8, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> I cautiously paused to capture my mud sodden foot earlier View attachment 205584



It's the full pink moon  









						Full Moon for April 2021
					

April's full Moon rises on Monday, April 26, at 11:33 PM Eastern Time. Called the Pink Moon, this full Moon will also be a supermoon! Here's everything you should know about the Moon this month, including facts, folklore, and Moon phase dates.




					www.almanac.com


----------



## Anju (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## killer b (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 8, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 9, 2020)

Amsterdam. Sound on!


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Apr 9, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 205630



Actually I was in the pub and well, you know...


----------



## Lord Camomile (Apr 9, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> Amsterdam. Sound on!


It's sweet, but I do feel for the couple in flat 18 who'd just sat down for their Bergman film night


----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)

Sky TV taking the piss.


----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)

For our resident Amazon delivery driver.


----------



## editor (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Apr 9, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 205661


Oh, _facts_.


----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 9, 2020)

Edited after being beaten up by wife.


----------



## Badgers (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 9, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 205661



But, that's what they would tell you.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 9, 2020)

Understand that Gordon Ramsey has moved to his holiday home by sea,. The Beckhams to their holiday home in the Cotswolds and Disgraced Prime Minister Johnsons dad has fled London to Devon. 

Will the police be visiting these people?


----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 9, 2020)

Shitehawks at the Diner 2


----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Understand that Gordon Ramsey has moved to his holiday home by sea,. The Beckhams to their holiday home in the Cotswolds and Disgraced Prime Minister Johnsons dad has fled London to Devon.
> 
> Will the police be visiting these people?



Not sure if you know SE London but I was fitting a post box outside a closed nursery a couple of hours ago on the A2 at the bottom of the hill heading towards blackheath and out of London. Traffic was close to normal levels!


----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)

This lady is going viral like a Corona.


----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)

From a researcher getting upset because people are not happy with the £10,000 working from home allowance for MPs. 

She seems to resent having to help people with enquiries about "bloody coronavirus"

Fuck her. 

"Copied from Kerri Prince

MPs are _not_ being paid an extra £10k to work from home.

Please read the actual article, not the headline.

It's to pay for the laptops and printers MPs staff need to work from home during this global pandemic, so that we can help people with their benefits, employment enquiries, housing problems, and the extra 200 enquiries we are getting a day about bloody coronavirus."


----------



## Badgers (Apr 9, 2020)

Anju said:


> From a researcher getting upset because people are not happy with the £10,000 working from home allowance for MPs.
> 
> She seems to resent having to help people with enquiries about "bloody coronavirus"
> 
> ...


They are more than well paid and supplied already


----------



## two sheds (Apr 9, 2020)

while for nurses it would be for essential food and rent and travel expenses while they look after people with bloody coronavirus


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)

Badgers said:


> They are more that well paid and supplied already



Exactly. I doubt there's a single person working in HOP who doesn't have a laptop and broadband.

Where's the money for all the businesses that have had to set up people to work from home.

It's just an excuse to buy a new laptop for MPs friends and family who do a couple of hours work a day for a good salary.


----------



## petee (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 9, 2020)

transport plod are stopping people (or at least anyone who doesn't look middle class professional, from what i gather) and asking why they are travelling



would  but touching face is not recommended at the moment


----------



## existentialist (Apr 9, 2020)

Anju said:


> From a researcher getting upset because people are not happy with the £10,000 working from home allowance for MPs.
> 
> She seems to resent having to help people with enquiries about "bloody coronavirus"
> 
> ...


Nice work if you can get it. I paid for this chair I sit in MYSELF. And the desk on which I work. And the computer. And the monitors. And the internet. And the router, hub, switch, cabling, wireless cards and the cost of fixing things (OK, I do that myself).

I also pay for the heat, the light, the rent, and the cups of tea I drink through the day.

And I've never begrudged it. But then I didn't realise that someone could be GIVEN £10k to do all that. Give me £10k to do all that, and I'll have change from 80% of it. Fuck you, MPs.


----------



## Anju (Apr 9, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Nice work if you can get it. I paid for this chair I sit in MYSELF. And the desk on which I work. And the computer. And the monitors. And the internet. And the router, hub, switch, cabling, wireless cards and the cost of fixing things (OK, I do that myself).
> 
> I also pay for the heat, the light, the rent, and the cups of tea I drink through the day.
> 
> And I've never begrudged it. But then I didn't realise that someone could be GIVEN £10k to do all that. Give me £10k to do all that, and I'll have change from 80% of it. Fuck you, MPs.



They didn't offer any help to businesses who must have had to spend a fortune arranging for people to work from home and they will often have to spend of ways of giving access to their IT infrastructure not just being able to send a few emails with stock responses. MPs might have a couple of staff. 

Companies can pay £6 per week to employees working from home before it becomes taxable income for them.


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 9, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## Zapp Brannigan (Apr 10, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 205791



Needs a Biscuitville.


----------



## fishfinger (Apr 10, 2020)

Zapp Brannigan said:


> Needs a Biscuitville.


I hope they do delivery 😋


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 10, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Nice work if you can get it. I paid for this chair I sit in MYSELF. And the desk on which I work. And the computer. And the monitors. And the internet. And the router, hub, switch, cabling, wireless cards and the cost of fixing things (OK, I do that myself).
> 
> I also pay for the heat, the light, the rent, and the cups of tea I drink through the day.
> 
> And I've never begrudged it. But then I didn't realise that someone could be GIVEN £10k to do all that. Give me £10k to do all that, and I'll have change from 80% of it. Fuck you, MPs.


Don't forget we're all in this together though.


----------



## existentialist (Apr 10, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Don't forget we're all in this together though.


No fucking MP's sitting in MY chair, paid for with my own (taxable) income, dammit 

Joking apart, I am appalled at the blatancy of it - I simply cannot believe that no-one involved in the process didn't stop and go "Hmm, half the country's suddenly got no work, we've got 1.2m UC claimants, is awarding ourselves a ten grand expenses bonus going to go down all that well?".

Or perhaps they did, and thought, "Fuck 'em, they're only citizens." 

ETA: I reserve for MPs (pretty well all of them) a similar level of disdain to the one SpookyFrank has for policemen and people who don't cycle. AMPAB, etc.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 10, 2020)

At last! A feelgood story in amongst all the gloom 



			Millionaire wrecks his ultra-rare $750,000 Porsche by crashing it while speeding round the streets of deserted Manhattan


----------



## editor (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 10, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 205836


What did they do on day 17? Carpet the ceilings?


----------



## ska invita (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 10, 2020)

Jesus and two thieves fined for hilltop gathering of more than two people
					

Police have been forced to disperse a crucifixion of more than two people which blatantly flouted social distancing rules.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Mation (Apr 10, 2020)

ska invita said:


>



You can't touch your face if you don't have one 🤣🤣


----------



## ska invita (Apr 10, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


Shouldn't they be standing further apart?


----------



## existentialist (Apr 10, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


>



Fucking excellent.


----------



## MrSki (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Apr 10, 2020)

Stonks!


----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## HalloweenJack (Apr 10, 2020)




----------



## red rose (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 11, 2020)

from London After People (@PeopleAfter) on Twitter


----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 11, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> from London After People (@PeopleAfter) on Twitter



I live with open fields back and front, I know I'm dead lucky to, especially now.

There is a part of me though that wishes I could spend a day in London ATM, just to experience the relative quiet and oddness of it all, I used to live in Lewisham, pretty near the station, I just can't even imagine it empty.


----------



## Epona (Apr 11, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> I live with open fields back and front, I know I'm dead lucky to, especially now.
> 
> There is a part of me though that wishes I could spend a day in London ATM, just to experience the relative quiet and oddness of it all, I used to live in Lewisham, pretty near the station, I just can't even imagine it empty.



I used to live in Hoxton (BEFORE it became trendy - this was back when it was a shithole) and on Sundays would often go for a wander round the City, all the big financial institutions were closed on a Sunday and the place was largely deserted, other than the markets on the outskirts - was really nice


----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 11, 2020)

Epona said:


> I used to live in Hoxton (BEFORE it became trendy - this was back when it was a shithole) and on Sundays would often go for a wander round the City, all the big financial institutions were closed on a Sunday and the place was largely deserted, other than the markets on the outskirts - was really nice



I was thinking of exactly that while I typed my post, used to love it in the City on a Sunday, so many mad things to find wondering about like heading up a small alley that takes your fancy and it'll lead to a green space or a church or a bit of London Wall


----------



## Epona (Apr 11, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> I was thinking of exactly that while I typed my post, used to love it in the City on a Sunday, so many mad things to find wondering about like heading up a small alley that takes your fancy and it'll lead to a green space or a church or a bit of London Wall



The whole area looked different without the hordes of suited office workers and cars and taxis - just the buses on Sunday service, occasionally some roadworks - they liked to do those at the weekend of course to avoid disruption during working hours.  It felt more like some historic cathedral city than the hub of finance it is during the week


----------



## N_igma (Apr 11, 2020)

A message for those running off to their second homes this weekend


----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 11, 2020)

Epona said:


> The whole area looked different without the hordes of suited office workers and cars and taxis - just the buses on Sunday service, occasionally some roadworks - they liked to do those at the weekend of course to avoid disruption during working hours.  It felt more like some historic cathedral city than the hub of finance it is during the week



Always great opportunities for some massive crane watching too.

My internal 6 year old child is showing a bit there


----------



## little_legs (Apr 11, 2020)

*The UK PM, to scale
*





source: here


----------



## spring-peeper (Apr 11, 2020)

N_igma said:


> A message for those running off to their second homes this weekend
> 
> View attachment 205995




Hell ya!!!

Don't you go bringing your virus into our area!!!


----------



## JimW (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 11, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> I live with open fields back and front, I know I'm dead lucky to, especially now.
> 
> There is a part of me though that wishes I could spend a day in London ATM, just to experience the relative quiet and oddness of it all, I used to live in Lewisham, pretty near the station, I just can't even imagine it empty.



Yeah, I live on the edge of a village (and know I'm lucky for easy access to empty countryside for walks), and even going into the village centre (the couple of times I've been for food shopping) it's strangely empty. This weekend it would usually be busy with tourists (I hope it will be empty  visitors can fuck off home, they shouldn't be driving here. I know I sound like a nimby, but this is the rare exception where it's ok to be one). I'd love to wander around London when it's quiet, or even around my own nearest city. I used to like when Sundays were empty in a city centre, as has been  said, noticing architecture or wandering down quiet alleys and discovering stuff, but now they're not so different from the rest of the week in areas where there are shops.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 11, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 206015


Wonder what animals are thinking - normally we're everywhere, making loads of noise and suddenly it all stops.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 11, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Wonder what animals are thinking - normally we're everywhere, making loads of noise and suddenly it all stops.



The seagulls are pissed-off, with the shortage of chips!


----------



## TopCat (Apr 11, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 206015


That made me smile, thank you


----------



## TopCat (Apr 11, 2020)

980 has affected my sleep.


----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 11, 2020)

N_igma said:


> A message for those running off to their second homes this weekend
> 
> View attachment 205995


Some of the old mining villages around Doncaster could display these without a pandemic.


----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 11, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> The seagulls are pissed-off, with the shortage of chips!


The authorities in East Yorkshire have warned us about desperate seagulls nicking people’s chips








						Beware hungry seagulls during lockdown, Yorkshire residents told
					

East Riding of Yorkshire council says coastal birds could be more aggressive due to lack of food




					www.google.co.uk


----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## jontz01 (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## Kaka Tim (Apr 11, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Wonder what animals are thinking - normally we're everywhere, making loads of noise and suddenly it all stops.



"corona virus is the fucking mutts nutts! big shout out to the bats - good work guys! Right -  which of you is going to come up with the next one?"


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Apr 11, 2020)

Fearless British media see past boring record death toll to break exclusive story that Boris Johnson is in a good mood
					

UK Broadcasters have patted themselves on the back for managing not to get distracted by the fact that the UK has overtaken Spain and Italy in daily death toll and instead zeroed in like snipers on the vital news that Boris Johnson was feeling rather chipper.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Lurdan (Apr 11, 2020)

Kaka Tim said:


> "corona virus is the fucking mutts nutts! big shout out to the bats - good work guys! Right -  which of you is going to come up with the next one?"


----------



## quimcunx (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 11, 2020)

From the BBC



> An online video chat for fans of BBC Radio 4 series The Archers had to be abandoned after being bombarded with pornography and Nazi swastikas.
> 
> The Dumteedum podcast, named after the refrain of the soap opera's theme tune, discusses all aspects of the programme.
> 
> ...


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## Lord Camomile (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## petee (Apr 11, 2020)

xes said:


>



that's lovely.


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 11, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 12, 2020)

I heard his underground mix tape is fire


----------



## JimW (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Apr 12, 2020)

JimW said:


>


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## ska invita (Apr 12, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> I used to live in Lewisham, pretty near the station, I just can't even imagine it empty.


It isn't really, maybe feels like a 10am ona Sunday morning. Still traffic still people


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## ska invita (Apr 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 206010


A friend of mine isn't that far off this... Though he goes home to his wife who is pregnant with twins and he's rightly nervous


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Apr 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


>



I heart Misery Bear!


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 12, 2020)

We ned to celebrate the diversity of UK food 









						Quarantine baking: forget banana bread, here's how to make an IRN-BRU cheesecake
					

The recipe for the super sweet dessert of dreams uses 500ml of Scotland's finest fizzy nectar AND Tunnock's Caramel Wafers




					www.edinburghlive.co.uk


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 12, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> We ned to celebrate the diversity of UK food
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I love Irn Bru but cheesecakes are manky and unpleasant.


----------



## belboid (Apr 12, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> We ned to celebrate the diversity of UK food
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Tunnock's are sadly unavailable at the moment   Otherwise it would be a fine addition to my weird cake bakes.


----------



## Petcha (Apr 12, 2020)

Prolly already been posted. But this is quite good.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Apr 12, 2020)

That’s the rest of my lockdown sorted. Nice one.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)

Best ever TV public service announcement...



It cracked me up.


----------



## editor (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 12, 2020)

Police to Play Coldplay on Loudspeakers to Keep People Indoors
					

All patrol cars will be fitted with loudspeakers playing Coldplay’s Greatest Hits in an effort to keep people indoors, The UK Metropolitan police announced today. As some members of the Briti…




					thedailyshunt.com


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## little_legs (Apr 12, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 12, 2020)

Llandudno


----------



## Treacle Toes (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## DexterTCN (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Apr 13, 2020)

DexterTCN said:


>




No social distancing, and they were putting their hands all over the doors and door handles. 

Nice that the officer waved on the way out though


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## petee (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## DexterTCN (Apr 13, 2020)

This one's mental...


----------



## Mation (Apr 13, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 206471


Why aren't they using drones?

In fact, why aren't we all having everything delivered by drones?    Seems like a missed opportunity for further descent into a dystopian nightmare!


----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 13, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## kenny g (Apr 14, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 206471



The wheelers were some of the first to wear gloves on the street in our area of East London couple of weeks back.


----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 14, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 14, 2020)

> World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) has resumed airing live matches after being deemed an "essential service" in Florida.


 









						Coronavirus: WWE resumes live fights after being deemed 'essential'
					

WWE returns to weekly live television after being labelled an 'essential service' in Florida.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## A380 (Apr 14, 2020)

NSFW or whilst you’re eating. Or indeed if you don’t want to use mind bleach. 



Spoiler


----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 14, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>




Getting him to apologise and to understand why he was a twat, fine, but he went way too far.

Probably why his son is a bit of a dick.


----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## petee (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 15, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>




Here's a before and after vid of the incident outside the store


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 15, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 206564


----------



## Signal 11 (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 15, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 206868


That's Norton Antivirus 2003
The virus definitions will be well out of date


----------



## platinumsage (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 15, 2020)

Tory MP working hard in Bishop Aukland


----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## UrbaneFox (Apr 15, 2020)

I don't want to frighten you unnecessarily, but it seems as though Dominic Cummings is very ill with Covid19.
Perhaps we should have a mutual support thread for when Peston breaks the news.


----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 15, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Tory MP working hard in Bishop Aukland




My son would fucking love this MP and her Tik Tok videos but:

1) He's 11.
2) We live in the States.


----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 15, 2020)

Cyrus rhymes with virus


----------



## xes (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 15, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## petee (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 16, 2020)

platinumsage said:


>



Owain  is the most entertaining weatherman I’ve ever seen.
It’s always joyous to see his forecasts when presenting on Look North.
A good double act with Harry Gration.
He could become a national treasure.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## Buddy Bradley (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Apr 16, 2020)

Coronavirus: Facebook will start warning users who engaged with 'harmful' misinformation
					

Users who have liked, shared or commented on posts with false claims will be directed to WHO’s ‘myth busters’ page




					www.theguardian.com
				




Promising development that could usefully be expanded a lot further if Facebook weren't likely to misuse it.


----------



## keybored (Apr 16, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Coronavirus: Facebook will start warning users who engaged with 'harmful' misinformation
> 
> 
> Users who have liked, shared or commented on posts with false claims will be directed to WHO’s ‘myth busters’ page
> ...


They should instantly disable the accounts of anyone interracting with those stories in any way. Unless it's with a "Haha" emoticon.


----------



## Badgers (Apr 16, 2020)

Firstly when did the NHS become 'Comic Relief' rather than tax payer funded institution?

Secondly...


----------



## smmudge (Apr 16, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Firstly when did the NHS become 'Comic Relief' rather than tax payer funded institution?



Yeah I don't like the idea that the NHS can be funded by donations rather than through govt from proper taxation including the wealthy and corporations. Aren't enough of our essential services already like that? Why aren't people questioning the very notion that we have to donate to fill the funding gap in the NHS ffs.


----------



## dessiato (Apr 16, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 17, 2020)

Librarians ftw


----------



## little_legs (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## JimW (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 17, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> View attachment 207206
> 
> Librarians ftw


How would it read in chronological order?


----------



## Badgers (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 17, 2020)

xes said:


> How would it read in chronological order?


Confusingly?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 17, 2020)

Wfh... no pants


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 17, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> Wfh... no pants
> 
> View attachment 207235


It's gonna hurt when that cat jumps up on his lap.


----------



## quiet guy (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 17, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> Wfh... no pants
> 
> View attachment 207235


i see two fleshlights and a tissue bin


----------



## belboid (Apr 17, 2020)

xes said:


> How would it read in chronological order?


Why would librarians put things n chronological order? That ain’t Dewey


----------



## xes (Apr 17, 2020)

belboid said:


> Why would librarians put things n chronological order? That ain’t Dewey


It shouldn't be dewey if its been kept in over night


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 17, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> i see two fleshlights and a tissue bin


Had to google fleshlights.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 17, 2020)

This fucking prick
I didn't think I could hate him any more but....








						Chef Pete Evans criticised for trying to sell $15,000 light device to fight coronavirus
					

Website ad claimed BioCharger machine was a ‘subtle energy revitalisation platform’




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## Mation (Apr 17, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> This fucking prick
> I didn't think I could hate him any more but....
> 
> 
> ...


Let's hope he only sells one device, and that it's to Gwyneth Paltrow.


----------



## keybored (Apr 17, 2020)

Mation said:


> Let's hope he only sells one device, and that it's to Gwyneth Paltrow.


And it malfunctions and turns her skin purple.


----------



## Mation (Apr 17, 2020)

keybored said:


> And it malfunctions and turns her skin purple.


A malfunction would suggest that it has some function   

(Rolleyes not directed at you!)


----------



## BristolEcho (Apr 17, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> This fucking prick
> I didn't think I could hate him any more but....
> 
> 
> ...



I'd never heard of him but he sounds horrendous.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 17, 2020)

Mation said:


> A malfunction would suggest that it has some function
> 
> (Rolleyes not directed at you!)


Ok, a "bonus feature"


----------



## xes (Apr 17, 2020)

Donny T forced to dress himself and do his own makeup in lockdown.


----------



## gosub (Apr 17, 2020)

xes said:


> Donny T forced to dress himself and do his own makeup in lockdown.



Hair has been grey this week


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 17, 2020)

Antifa infiltrate Trumps coronavirus debrief.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 17, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> View attachment 207231


In honour of that I've renamed my wifi network to GCHQ SIGINT to troll my neigbours. 

kebabking - ideas for good names welcome


----------



## Indeliblelink (Apr 17, 2020)




----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 18, 2020)

BristolEcho said:


> I'd never heard of him but he sounds horrendous.


He is horrendous. Australian chef, paleo/keto evangelist and dangerous woo merchant.

Has pushed the idea that babies don't need milk but should be fed on bone broth instead.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 18, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Has pushed the idea that babies don't need milk but should be fed on bone broth instead.



Did he watch too much Mandalorian?


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 18, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Did he watch too much Mandalorian?


I am aware of this thing of which you speak but sadly, the specifics of the reference are beyond me.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 18, 2020)

baby yoda drinks bone broth


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 18, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> baby yoda drinks bone broth


Oh! I see. Baby Yoda is cute


----------



## lefteri (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 18, 2020)

danny la rouge said:


>



I can't stop watching that


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 18, 2020)

Scientists are recommending MDMA for treating mental health after lockdown
					

The use of psilocybin is also being called for



					mixmag.net


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## Mordi (Apr 18, 2020)

One for Shippou-Sensei


----------



## Lurdan (Apr 18, 2020)

> Do you want to know if you have corona?
> Spit on a bourgeois and wait for their test results!
> Solidarity with the workers.


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 18, 2020)

Mordi said:


> One for Shippou-Sensei




Yeah i'll confirm it if there is a gratuitous beach or hotsprings episode next.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 18, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Antifa infiltrate Trumps coronavirus debrief.
> 
> View attachment 207334


They are the only ones leaning left


----------



## quiet guy (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 18, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> They are the only ones leaning left



It’s probably the meth kicking in


----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 18, 2020)

quiet guy said:


>




In Germany they also force other EU countries to enact brutal austerity policies and privatise public services.

#justsaying


----------



## belboid (Apr 18, 2020)

quiet guy said:


>



and the funny thing is, Henning Wehn is the only actually funny person mentioned whenever someones wants a list of right-wing comedians


----------



## BristolEcho (Apr 18, 2020)

quiet guy said:


>




This one I love. Simple, but pulled off to perfection.


----------



## editor (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Apr 18, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>




Liguria is a province, not a city.


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 18, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Liguria is a province, not a city.


I'll pass that crucial message on Frank, thanks.


----------



## keybored (Apr 18, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Liguria is a province, not a city.


It's a region, not a province.


----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 18, 2020)

Meanwhile near Rotherham.


----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 18, 2020)

Thousands of Scots are creating homemade sex toys during lockdown
					

Online searches for how to make adult toys at home have soared in the last four weeks.




					www.dailyrecord.co.uk
				






> Sex toys sales have soared during coronavirus lockdown, but it appears that Scots are also making their own.
> 
> As couples and singletons run out of lockdown ideas, Google searches for homemade self-pleasure products have soared to 23,315 as those staying indoors look for new ways to stay entertained.
> 
> OnBuy analysed which UK cities are getting stuck in to creating their own sex toys, and ranked them in order of the percentage of population searching for the homemade products.







> Residents in London are the most curious about how to make their own lube, while *those in Worthing are searching how to make dildos most frequently.*


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 18, 2020)

One for Shippou-Sensei...


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 18, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> One for Shippou-Sensei...
> 
> View attachment 207495


I've watched that show









						The "Hentai" Prince and the Stony Cat. - Wikipedia
					






					en.m.wikipedia.org
				



.

Besides if you really want people to distance themselves you would go for a hentai shirt





__





						Amazon.com: Ahegao Print T Shirt Men Women Harajuku Face Red Woman T Shirts Funny Shy Girl Tops Cute Clothing (Color Ahegao T Shirt, Asian XXL) : Clothing, Shoes & Jewelry
					

Buy Ahegao Print T Shirt Men Women Harajuku Face Red Woman T Shirts Funny Shy Girl Tops Cute Clothing (Color Ahegao T Shirt, Asian XXL): Shop top fashion brands T-Shirts at Amazon.com ✓ FREE DELIVERY and Returns possible on eligible purchases



					www.amazon.com
				




Silly Amazon calls it a harajuku shirt when it's clearly an akiba shirt...


----------



## existentialist (Apr 18, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Silly Amazon calls it a harajuku shirt when it's clearly an akiba shirt...


Tchah, such naive fools, and so out of touch with the prevailing zeitgeist...


----------



## IC3D (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## MickiQ (Apr 18, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>



They're pretty good, if it was me playing the streets would be full of people lying stunned from tennis balls dropping on their heads.


----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 18, 2020)

gosub said:


>



who's been filming me in secret?


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 18, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Tchah, such naive fools, and so out of touch with the prevailing zeitgeist...



They are they one hawking anime o face t-shirts. 

It's like getting a forign language tatto. You should probably know what it means.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## LiamO (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## BristolEcho (Apr 18, 2020)

LiamO said:


> View attachment 207515



People would probably avoid you with this on too so probably good for social distancing.


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## sleaterkinney (Apr 18, 2020)

Someone tell UK P&P.


----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 18, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Apr 19, 2020)

keybored said:


> View attachment 207555


Dark.


----------



## planetgeli (Apr 19, 2020)

"STREET PARTY THIS THURSDAY 8PM WESTMINSTER BRIDGE. BRING A BOTTLE."


----------



## Mordi (Apr 19, 2020)

sleaterkinney said:


> Someone tell UK P&P.
> 
> View attachment 207553



I have sympathies for the view that prioritising the wellbeing of the most vulnerable in our communities could preempt a reappraisal of the dominant paradigm of contemporary society away from the needs of profit to the organisation of labour to the good of all. However, whilst wishing to avoid appearing a  vulgar programmist I feel the comrade here is mistaken in that simply adopting the practice of crisis limitation will bring about a sufficent transformation of the current order. The way forward lies over the bones of the bourgeoisie, forwards comrades!


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 19, 2020)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 207596



Towards the bottom of last page.


----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Towards the bottom of last page.


Plank’s constant.


----------



## Mation (Apr 19, 2020)

Been reading some of the articles on the emerging evidence of Covid-19-related neurological disorder, e.g. a patient who, having recovered from the virus itself, has been discharged to a rehabilitation facility, with medics cautiously optimistic that she will make a full [neurological?] recovery.

There's a nagging, irrational tickle at the back of my spidey senses that's finding quiet, terrified voice in the questions: "Is she ambulatory? Is this the start of the 'zombie' apocalypse we've all been waiting for?"

_doing my bit for the fear-mongering remit of this thread_


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 19, 2020)

Another reason to socially distance : can you catch corona virus from farts




__





						No Cookies | Daily Telegraph
					

No Cookies




					www.dailytelegraph.com.au


----------



## spitfire (Apr 19, 2020)

planetgeli said:


> View attachment 207587
> 
> 
> "STREET PARTY THIS THURSDAY 8PM WESTMINSTER BRIDGE. BRING A BOTTLE."



Hahaha, nice one! Hope you don't mind but I memed it for easy sharing.


----------



## Mation (Apr 19, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Another reason to socially distance : can you catch corona virus from farts
> 
> 
> 
> ...


There's gotta be an Ig Nobel Prize in that


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 19, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> View attachment 207678



It was £21m on the last page, post 2331, why has it gone down to £20m?


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Apr 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> It was £21m on the last page, post 2331, why has it gone down to £20m?



ffs - & I fucking checked


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> It was £21m on the last page, post 2331, why has it gone down to £20m?


Blew a million on crack already.


----------



## A380 (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## JimW (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## LiamO (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 19, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 20, 2020)

Spotted this in the comments of a thread where some people were daring to question how exactly a Woolwich ferry doing doughnuts in The Thames is meaningfully supporting NHS workers.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## killer b (Apr 20, 2020)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 207596


Danny! This is just up the road from me!


----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 20, 2020)

killer b said:


> Danny! This is just up the road from me!


I know.

Wave at your window in two minutes.


----------



## gosub (Apr 20, 2020)

Possible explanation as to why 5G is having a different effect on flat earthers.


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 20, 2020)

Being interviewed on the TV at home


----------



## editor (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Apr 20, 2020)

Wouldn’t normally post loyalist content. But it did make me laugh. Which is probably a failing of mine. From the Shankhill Road, allegedly may or may not be pixels....is pixels...


----------



## killer b (Apr 20, 2020)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 207596


I just walked past, someone has told them they're famous.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Apr 20, 2020)

oh, and


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## stuff_it (Apr 20, 2020)

This is going to be my next fancy dress costume...


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 20, 2020)

FridgeMagnet said:


> oh, and



Bloody hell there's a two tier Soylent Green, one for the rich and then what's left for the rest


----------



## cybershot (Apr 20, 2020)

Apologies if already done. Hard to search memes!


----------



## The39thStep (Apr 20, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Apr 21, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




Obvious right wing troll, anyone who believes the DHSC set these up is a loon. Deaf, FBPE _and_ transitioning this year? JFC


----------



## Mation (Apr 21, 2020)

platinumsage said:


> Obvious right wing troll, anyone who believes the DHSC set these up is a loon. Deaf, FBPE _and_ transitioning this year? JFC


Did you read the thread (on Twitter)? There's a link in it somewhere to an NHS web page that has profiles of some of the staff. "NHS_Susan" is actually called Mia, and there's nothing mentioned about being deaf or transitioning (not that there necessarily would be). I don't know who might have  set up the tweets, but they definitely don't seem legit, weird as that is...

e2a: Here's more about it. (The website was Unison's, not NHS).









						Biggest political scandal since Cambridge Analytica about to break as fake NHS accounts ‘set up by Dept of Health’
					

Brilliant work by anti-racism group founder exposes more than 100 fake accounts and ties them to DHSC The Department of Health (DHSC) has been tied to a string of fake social media accounts by inve…




					skwawkbox.org


----------



## platinumsage (Apr 21, 2020)

Mation said:


> Did you read the thread (on Twitter)? There's a link in it somewhere to an NHS web page that has profiles of some of the staff. "NHS_Susan" is actually called Mia, and there's nothing mentioned about being deaf or transitioning (not that there necessarily would be). I don't know who might have  set up the tweets, but they definitely don't seem legit, weird as that is...



Obviosuly they were set up by a troll with stolen pictures, not by the government, as some twatterarti are claiming.


----------



## Mation (Apr 21, 2020)

platinumsage said:


> Obviosuly they were set up by a troll with stolen pictures, not by the government.


Ah, I get you! Misread you first as you saying John O'Connell was the right wing troll. Which wouldn't make much sense 

As you were!


----------



## A380 (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## teqniq (Apr 21, 2020)

This is apparently not a spoof



there is no hope


----------



## keybored (Apr 21, 2020)

cybershot said:


> View attachment 207976



Says the original bat-eater.


----------



## gosub (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 21, 2020)

Big Bertha said:


> View attachment 208035


Oh! thank fuck, I must be immune, as I paid for a licence years ago 😌


----------



## petee (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 21, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Apr 21, 2020)

The teacher fainted.


----------



## Badgers (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 22, 2020)

Easier read:









						A thread written by @abigaildisney
					

OK, I've been holding my tongue on the theory that a pandemic is no time to be calling people out on anything other than failing us in a public health sense. I thought it might be a moment for peace and reconciliation. But I feel a thread coming on....1/




					threader.app


----------



## Yossarian (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 22, 2020)

Kia Kaha & remember 'Don't Touch This!'


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 22, 2020)

teqniq said:


> This is apparently not a spoof
> 
> 
> 
> there is no hope



You can't fix stupid.  What's the betting she'll catch it after coming out with that shit.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Apr 22, 2020)

I don’t believe for a moment that the woman talking about Jacksonville in that video is anything other than a spoof.


----------



## Anju (Apr 22, 2020)

Some mountain goat parkour in Malaga city.


----------



## hegley (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## teqniq (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 22, 2020)

teqniq said:


> View attachment 208188



Counter protester at a pro peace rally outside a St. Louis Boeing missile factory in 2003.


----------



## teqniq (Apr 22, 2020)

I thought I'd seen it before. Thanks


----------



## gosub (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 22, 2020)

I think we can all agree with him.


----------



## existentialist (Apr 22, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 208214
> 
> I think we can all agree with him.


I hope he was able to stay and express his dissenting view for as long as he wanted to. After all, the others are campaigning for "freedom", aren't they?


----------



## imposs1904 (Apr 22, 2020)

Wow, turns out I'm a god damn hero. Aww, shucks.


----------



## Lurdan (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## Ranbay (Apr 22, 2020)

Ohhh, not seen this thread... steals everything


----------



## Yossarian (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## Clair De Lune (Apr 22, 2020)

gosub said:


>



Can I ask a stupid question...how do I share videos like this without linking to this site? Is it possible?


----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 22, 2020)

share button at the top gives you the FB link


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 22, 2020)

Look at this mad bastard


----------



## xes (Apr 22, 2020)

keybored said:


> Counter protester at a pro peace rally outside a St. Louis Boeing missile factory in 2003.
> 
> View attachment 208191


Why did someone go to the trouble of editing only 1 of the spelling mistakes, why not do the other one, huh, huh?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Apr 22, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Look at this mad bastard
> View attachment 208253


Whereas I applaud his sentiment, most adults fooling around on trampolines end up in A&E before long, and every avoidable visit to A&E during this crisis takes away precious NHS resources.

Fuck, I’ve become my grandmother


----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 22, 2020)




----------



## ricbake (Apr 22, 2020)

Hey all you cool cats and kittens.....


----------



## Treacle Toes (Apr 22, 2020)

Must have for Xmas, get yours while stocks last.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Apr 23, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


Yikes! I've got athe tits  

Using a bra as PPE doesn't seem so daft now, does it?!


----------



## Epona (Apr 23, 2020)

Mation said:


> Yikes! I've got athe tits
> 
> Using a bra as PPE doesn't seem so daft now, does it?!



I've got a couple of dust masks that could be fashioned into a Corona protection bra


----------



## Mation (Apr 23, 2020)

Epona said:


> I've got a couple of dust masks that could be fashioned into a Corona protection bra


They can even be worn upside down to provide underwiring


----------



## May Kasahara (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Apr 23, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


>



That would be totally, utterly brilliant if didn't include those couple where the sideshow violence is to women. The revenge cuts away before the man gets hurt...

Why couldn't they just make it without that


----------



## Badgers (Apr 23, 2020)

Anyone's parents / grandparents showing any small remorse for voting Tory yet?


----------



## existentialist (Apr 23, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


>



The only thing I can find to criticise this for is that it doesn't loop continuously. I especially liked the hand sanitiser and child sequences


----------



## existentialist (Apr 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Anyone's parents / grandparents showing any small remorse for voting Tory yet?


I think one of the defining characteristics of the kind of person who votes Tory is that they are incapable of remorse.


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Anyone's parents / grandparents showing any small remorse for voting Tory yet?


I have one elderly relative who remains firmly of the view that the government should just let all the old/infirm people die, and get the economy going again.  She's 80 and takes every opportunity she can to expound this view.


----------



## gosub (Apr 23, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I have one elderly relative who remains firmly of the view that the government should just let all the old/infirm people die, and get the economy going again.  She's 80 and takes every opportunity she can to expound this view.


Well you know what to get her for Xmas EasyJet Single to Switzerland


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 23, 2020)

gosub said:


> Well you know what to get her for Xmas EasyJet Single to Switzerland


I'm not entirely sure that I'm in the will.


----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 23, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 208349



Still got a red passport will that make a difference?


----------



## MickiQ (Apr 23, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I have one elderly relative who remains firmly of the view that the government should just let all the old/infirm people die, and get the economy going again.  She's 80 and takes every opportunity she can to expound this view.


that is very unusual tbf, proponents of the "Let The Vulnerable Die" school of thought usually tend to be in the Not Vulnerable groups.


----------



## Epona (Apr 23, 2020)

Can I just say that at the moment I pretty much live for this thread giving me a good 'Rona related laugh each afternoon when I haul my depressed self out of bed...


----------



## 2hats (Apr 23, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 208349


They forgot to mention that, for reasons of consistency, they are taking temperature measurements rectally.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 23, 2020)

2hats said:


> They forgot to mention that, for reasons of consistency, they are taking temperature measurements rectally.


I find it easier to use my hands


----------



## not-bono-ever (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 23, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> View attachment 208409



What about


----------



## dessiato (Apr 23, 2020)

The Mayor of a city in Spain's Catalunya resigns after getting caught breaking lockdown rules, drunk driving and attacking a police officer - Olive Press News Spain
					

THE Mayor of a town in Catalunya has resigned after getting caught breaking lockdown rules, drunk driving and attacking a police officer.




					www.theolivepress.es
				




There's at least two other threads this could go on.


----------



## petee (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 23, 2020)

Fail.


----------



## Lord Camomile (Apr 23, 2020)

imposs1904 said:


> Wow, turns out I'm a god damn hero. Aww, shucks.
> 
> View attachment 208215


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 23, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 23, 2020)

yuck, what doggerel


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 23, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> yuck, what doggerel


Oh come on, apart from that bit about Boris, it wasn't that bad. Actually quite moving, apart from the bit about Boris ( though I may be a little tired and emotional ).


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 24, 2020)

oops


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 24, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 208497
> 
> oops


That would be a nice surprise for some library workers as they love shelving and putting stock in order (well it would for me)


----------



## petee (Apr 24, 2020)

keybored said:


> Counter protester at a pro peace rally outside a St. Louis Boeing missile factory in 2003.
> 
> View attachment 208191



the all time classic


----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 24, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 208497
> 
> oops


Makes perfect sense tbf - books look better when arranged in a visually pleasing manner.


----------



## Mation (Apr 24, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


>



Omg that's wonderful  😂 😂 😂


----------



## kabbes (Apr 24, 2020)

The first sentence, I thought “My, she had a deep voice.  And why is she talking nonsense about UV light?”

THEN my brain caught up.


----------



## Mation (Apr 24, 2020)

kabbes said:


> The first sentence, I thought “My, she had a deep voice.  And why is she talking nonsense about UV light?”
> 
> THEN my brain caught up.


Same same.

Though I've stopped finding it funny now that I've seen the clip of the Principal Clown himself delivering those words, and the even less coherent bit that immediately followed.

Jesus fucking Christ


----------



## dessiato (Apr 24, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


>



I thought this was just a well made piss take. Then I saw the BBC website...


----------



## Mation (Apr 24, 2020)

My despondency didn't last long. I'm now bordering on the clinically hysterical, having watched it again. And again. She's just too good  😂


----------



## cybershot (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 24, 2020)

I had a nightmare about it last night - shaking and shouting at a small version of Trump while no one around me took any notice 

I bet there will be people in his circle who are MMS loons ...

(bleach enemas to cure autism)


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 24, 2020)

One for spring-peeper...


----------



## danski (Apr 24, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 208529


Darwin in action.


----------



## existentialist (Apr 24, 2020)

danski said:


> Darwin in action.


Except that most of them probably married their cousins at 13, and have already bred


----------



## Big Bertha (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Apr 24, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 208526



General observation and not having a go at you cupid_stunt 

It's probably just me but this whole lionising of healthcare workers and elevation to near god like status is getting a bit much, its getting and even beyond military standards during wartime. I dunno.  I spoke with my mum yesterday who is a nurse (who has come out of retirement, even though she is high risk group herself ) and she is finding it all a bit nauseating.  A salary consummate to the role they play in society, the proper training for the role and the proper equipment for the role?  Nah mate.  Claps and over the top memes.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 24, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> General observation and not having a go at you cupid_stunt
> 
> It's probably just me but this whole lionising of healthcare workers and elevation to near god like status is getting a bit much, its getting and even beyond military standards during wartime. I dunno.  I spoke with my mum yesterday who is a nurse (who has come out of retirement, even though she is high risk group herself ) and she is finding it all a bit nauseating.  A salary consummate to the role they play in society, the proper training for the role and the proper equipment for the role?  Nah mate.  Claps and over the top memes.


It's not only you because this:
_"A salary consummate to the role they play in society, the proper training for the role and the proper equipment for the role?  Nah mate.  Claps and over the top memes"_


----------



## William of Walworth (Apr 24, 2020)

I mainly agree with Teaboy there, but TBF to most NHS worker applausers, the vast majority would agree fully** with paying and equipping them properly? Surely? That's my guess anyway?

**Apart from Tories


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## Lorca (Apr 24, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> General observation and not having a go at you cupid_stunt
> 
> It's probably just me but this whole lionising of healthcare workers and elevation to near god like status is getting a bit much, its getting and even beyond military standards during wartime. I dunno.  I spoke with my mum yesterday who is a nurse (who has come out of retirement, even though she is high risk group herself ) and she is finding it all a bit nauseating.  A salary consummate to the role they play in society, the proper training for the role and the proper equipment for the role?  Nah mate.  Claps and over the top memes.


Yep, agreed. My partner is a nurse, she says all this eulogizing is doing her head in - there are loads of nurses, some are good, some are brilliant, some are poor, some are stepping up to the plate, some using C19 as an excuse to go on paid sick leave for a few weeks! same as in any other job. She says just before the crisis she was getting dogs abuse by some family members of patients on a regular basis and now they're clapping away, but they'll go back to being abusive and rude as soon as they feel they can. What most Nurses really want atm (according to my partner at least) is safe staffing levels, decent PPE and a fucking pay rise and who can blame 'em!


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 24, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> General observation and not having a go at you cupid_stunt
> 
> It's probably just me but this whole lionising of healthcare workers and elevation to near god like status is getting a bit much, its getting and even beyond military standards during wartime. I dunno.  I spoke with my mum yesterday who is a nurse (who has come out of retirement, even though she is high risk group herself ) and she is finding it all a bit nauseating.  A salary consummate to the role they play in society, the proper training for the role and the proper equipment for the role?  Nah mate.  Claps and over the top memes.


My cousin is a nurse and is saying the same, so I made this for her.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## planetgeli (Apr 24, 2020)

planetgeli said:


> View attachment 207587
> 
> 
> "STREET PARTY THIS THURSDAY 8PM WESTMINSTER BRIDGE. BRING A BOTTLE."



I see the advertising worked.









						Emergency Services join in with crowded Clap for Carers celebrations
					

Crowds gathered on Westminster Bridge to celebrate key workers, for a second week running.




					metro.co.uk


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 24, 2020)

Lorca said:


> Yep, agreed. My partner is a nurse, she says all this eulogizing is doing her head in - there are loads of nurses, some are good, some are brilliant, some are poor, some are stepping up to the plate, some using C19 as an excuse to go on paid sick leave for a few weeks! same as in any other job. She says just before the crisis she was getting dogs abuse by some family members of patients on a regular basis and now they're clapping away, but they'll go back to being abusive and rude as soon as they feel they can. What most Nurses really want atm (according to my partner at least) is safe staffing levels, decent PPE and a fucking pay rise and who can blame 'em!



Yeah, I’ve been called a ‘hero’ and told I’m ‘doing a fantastic job’ and lots of over gushing’s of ‘ thank you so, so much’ this week already and I’m just delivering parcels ffs.

I mean, I appreciate the spirit but as soon as this is all over I’ll be told to shut the gate on the way out, parcels grabbed out of hands without any acknowledgement and generally become invisible again


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 24, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> Yeah, I’ve been called a ‘hero’ and told I’m ‘doing a fantastic job’


Just print out a load of cards with the following URL on it, and hand them out to the fawners. That'll put a stop to it 








						Search results
					






					www.urban75.net


----------



## xes (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 24, 2020)

Trumps chief medical adviser...


----------



## xes (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## xes (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## emanymton (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## littlebabyjesus (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 24, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Apr 25, 2020)

Get that ultraviolet in.


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## May Kasahara (Apr 25, 2020)

Lorca said:


> Yep, agreed. My partner is a nurse, she says all this eulogizing is doing her head in - there are loads of nurses, some are good, some are brilliant, some are poor, some are stepping up to the plate, some using C19 as an excuse to go on paid sick leave for a few weeks! same as in any other job. She says just before the crisis she was getting dogs abuse by some family members of patients on a regular basis and now they're clapping away, but they'll go back to being abusive and rude as soon as they feel they can. What most Nurses really want atm (according to my partner at least) is safe staffing levels, decent PPE and a fucking pay rise and who can blame 'em!



My friend who is a HDU nurse said much the same. Every time I hear my Tory voting neighbours clapping away outside, I think of her scathing expression and laugh, bitterly.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Apr 25, 2020)

Bringing you a little cheer


----------



## dessiato (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## Calamity1971 (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 25, 2020)




----------



## Epona (Apr 25, 2020)

gosub said:


>


----------



## gosub (Apr 25, 2020)

Epona said:


> View attachment 208984



I'd like, but I think thats the Hindenburg and not many walked away from that


----------



## Epona (Apr 25, 2020)

gosub said:


> I'd like, but I think thats the Hindenburg and not many walked away from that



I'm in a bleak mood, I thought it darkly appropriate (also many airships were successful)


----------



## gosub (Apr 25, 2020)

Epona said:


> I'm in a bleak mood, I thought it darkly appropriate (also many airships were successful)



Things will never be the same again, tis true, but its got to be about making sure the change on the other end of the turbulence is for the better.


----------



## Epona (Apr 25, 2020)

gosub said:


> Things will never be the same again, tis true, but its got to be about making sure the change on the other end of the turbulence is for the better.



Oh FFS everyone else on this thread is allowed to make a joke (often dark and apocalyptic) but someone wakes up for the one I do and has a go about it... What the fuck is the point in anything really.  Just put me on ignore if you don't like it.


----------



## gosub (Apr 25, 2020)

Epona said:


> Oh FFS everyone else on this thread is allowed to make a joke (often dark and apocalyptic) but someone wakes up for the one I do and has a go about it... What the fuck is the point in anything really.  Just put me on ignore if you don't like it.



Sorry ex indusrty, and as much as I used to love the pics in calander our Insurer used to send each year but they were ones people walked away from.  I was @ Farnboourgh.

(+a bit stoned )


----------



## Epona (Apr 26, 2020)

Genuinely sorry, I didn't realise Hindenburg stuff was "too soon"

You do understand it was in the context of the "I thought maybe if I tie my balloons to the playhouse...", right?  Also physics... sailing into disaster... never mind, I give up


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## blairsh (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Apr 26, 2020)

Epona said:


> Genuinely sorry, I didn't realise Hindenburg stuff was "too soon"
> 
> You do understand it was in the context of the "I thought maybe if I tie my balloons to the playhouse...", right?  Also physics... sailing into disaster... never mind, I give up


I lol'd


----------



## nogojones (Apr 26, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 208497
> 
> oops


The correct way


----------



## nogojones (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (Apr 26, 2020)

My gf just sent me this:


----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 26, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> My gf just sent me this:
> 
> View attachment 209036


Yeah, so, what was it you were saying about me not wanting to research the facts?  Do you actually forget what you last posted? Or just think we do?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2020)

I don't know about injecting bleach, but I need some mind bleach to un-see that ^^^.


----------



## pesh (Apr 26, 2020)

UV lights work too if you smash them into your eyes.


----------



## nogojones (Apr 26, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> My gf just sent me this:
> 
> View attachment 209036


Is that her way of having a quiet word


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 26, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I don't know about injecting bleach, but I need some mind bleach to un-see that ^^^.


I found a very disturbing painting of him nude before he was elected - it's deeply traumatic, but I can send it to you if you like.  

ETA - found it.  It's far from flattering...


----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 26, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I found a very disturbing painting of him nude before he was elected - it's deeply traumatic, but I can send it to you if you like.
> 
> ETA - found it.  It's far from flattering...



Post it

_rubs thighs_


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 26, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> Post it
> 
> _rubs thighs_


Don't say I didn't warn you!  



Spoiler: Not for the faint hearted


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## lizzieloo (Apr 26, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Don't say I didn't warn you!
> 
> 
> 
> ...



* barf *


----------



## Mation (Apr 26, 2020)

.


----------



## Mation (Apr 26, 2020)

pesh said:


> UV lights work too if you smash them into your eyes.


Do not make me spit out my wine


----------



## editor (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 26, 2020)




----------



## Epona (Apr 26, 2020)

It's no surprise people don't know what 2m is, some blokes think that this <----> is 6 inches


----------



## Marty1 (Apr 27, 2020)

Cardi B is having a rough time during isolation.


----------



## Bschokinme (Apr 27, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> View attachment 200156


----------



## ruffneck23 (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 27, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 209214


So a wurzels concert?


----------



## 2hats (Apr 27, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 209214


Actually a cotton picker.


----------



## gosub (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Apr 27, 2020)

Here there's 3 diplomas that you print for kids thanking them for staying in.


----------



## A380 (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 27, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 209245


subtle


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## editor (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 27, 2020)

Chris Mann is brilliant with his parodies, I can't remember if I shared the one below on here, or just on whatsapp, but it cracked me up.


----------



## mx wcfc (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## teqniq (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Apr 27, 2020)

Zammo still using.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 27, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 209386
> 
> 
> View attachment 209387


----------



## Epona (Apr 27, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 209392



And all this time I thought it was cat shit that was the real hazard in public sandpits!


----------



## Epona (Apr 27, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 209386
> 
> 
> View attachment 209387



And that is just arse-clenchingly embarrassing


----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 27, 2020)

Epona said:


> And that is just arse-clenchingly embarrassing


the second tweet makes up for it though


----------



## RedRedRose (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Apr 28, 2020)

This may be the meme thread but thus is actually true, providing further evidence in support of Sod's Law:


----------



## Lord Camomile (Apr 28, 2020)

Epona said:


> And that is just arse-clenchingly embarrassing





Orang Utan said:


> the second tweet makes up for it though


Yeah, I get the feeling it was knowingly embarrassing. It's the "(as in the skating move)" that clinches it.


----------



## kabbes (Apr 28, 2020)

platinumsage said:


> This may be the meme thread but thus is actually true, providing further evidence in support of Sod's Law:



Well, personally I’m enjoying not having to commute on a packed train with no air conditioning for over an hour each way, and not having to sit in a bizarrely-cold-because-overzealous-air-conditioning artificially lit office during this unseasonably sunny weather.


----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 28, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Chris Mann is brilliant with his parodies, I can't remember if I shared the one below on here, or just on whatsapp, but it cracked me up.



That one's even better   He's very good isn't he (and easy on the eye , if that's not misandrist to say  ), I don't even know who he is, some modern pop beat combo/soloist?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 28, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> That one's even better   He's very good isn't he (and easy on the eye , if that's not misandrist to say  ), I don't even know who he is, some modern pop beat combo/soloist?



I had never heard of him, apparently he's American, been on 'The Voice' over there, released an album, and toured for two years with the American tour of 'The Phantom of the Opera', playing the Phantom. 

There's more of his parodies on youtube - Chris Mann - YouTube


----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 28, 2020)

Ah, ok, then no reason I would have heard of him


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## RedRedRose (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## Supine (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Apr 28, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 28, 2020)

xxxx


----------



## dessiato (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Apr 29, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 209586View attachment 209587View attachment 209588


Yeah, see, I was trying to fit the words of the bottom one to the tune of Jolene. Really hard  

(Before parsing them, I should add!)


----------



## danny la rouge (Apr 29, 2020)

Mation said:


> Yeah, see, I was trying to fit the words of the bottom one to the tune of Jolene. Really hard
> 
> (Before parsing them, I should add!)


Me too! I thought it was the verse. “Your beauty is beyond compare”
“The latest figures show a total”


----------



## teqniq (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Apr 29, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Fury As Farage Accepts Job In Spain - Costa Del Sol Update
> 
> 
> Fury As Farage Accepts Job In Spain.  The Spanish government has controversially employed Nigel Farage to assist in their efforts to enforce the national lockdown.
> ...



Meanwhile


----------



## elbows (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Apr 29, 2020)

Mystery person in Black Death plague costume ‘terrifying’ community
					

Police are hunting a person who has been walking around a Norwich suburb in a “terrifying” plague outfit.




					www.edp24.co.uk


----------



## dessiato (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 29, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (Apr 30, 2020)

Life hack


----------



## Yossarian (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 30, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> View attachment 209793
> 
> Life hack



In the post literally just one above yours.


----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 30, 2020)

Life Hack is a better joke though


----------



## cyril_smear (Apr 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> In the post literally just one above yours.



oh dear.


----------



## gosub (Apr 30, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 209794



More than one way of looking at that. Quite glad it was the RAF Memorial F|light that did Captain Moore's flight past rather than a commercial Spitfire operator.


----------



## Treacle Toes (Apr 30, 2020)

Do the math...


----------



## platinumsage (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Apr 30, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Apr 30, 2020)

Mation said:


> Why aren't they using drones?
> 
> In fact, why aren't we all having everything delivered by drones?    Seems like a missed opportunity for further descent into a dystopian nightmare!


Phew! Opportunity rescued 









						Drone-to-door medicines trial takes flight in Ireland
					

A trial with the Irish health authority uses drones to bring medicine straight to the door.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 30, 2020)

Mation said:


> Phew! Opportunity rescued
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Lying companies promoting themselves using lies.
They can't do this legally. Laws would have to be changed in order for it to happen. It's illegal (for anyone who isn't the millitary) to fly a 'drone' outside line-of-sight. That includes Amazon, and lying drone companies in Ireland.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Apr 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 209839


----------



## HAL9000 (Apr 30, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Lying companies promoting themselves using lies.
> They can't do this legally. Laws would have to be changed in order for it to happen. It's illegal (for anyone who isn't the millitary) to fly a 'drone' outside line-of-sight. That includes Amazon, and lying drone companies in Ireland.



there is this..









						Coronavirus: Drones to deliver NHS supplies to Isle of Wight
					

A delivery drone trial between Hampshire and the Isle of Wight has been brought forward.



					www.bbc.co.uk
				




I don't know if they go beyond line of sight, flight to isle of wight is very very short.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Apr 30, 2020)

HAL9000 said:


> there is this..
> 
> 
> 
> ...


That article says:



> Two safety pilots - one at each airfield - will oversee each flight.



But it also says:


> However, the route has not yet been approved by the Civil Aviation Authority (CAA) and the trial cannot start without permission.


----------



## ruffneck23 (May 1, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (May 1, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


>



In fairness, that was some ace CGI... Green ceiling cat 🤣


----------



## HAL9000 (May 1, 2020)




----------



## Mation (May 1, 2020)

HAL9000 said:


>



Is that Brad Pitt?


----------



## belboid (May 1, 2020)

Mation said:


> Is that Brad Pitt?


Yes.  

Fauci had earlier said he wouldn't mind being parodied on SNL as long as it was by BP.


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (May 1, 2020)

Mation said:


> Is that Brad Pitt?



Yip


----------



## phillm (May 1, 2020)

WTAF  Dismaland launches an animatronic Farige.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 1, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 1, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (May 1, 2020)

phillm said:


> WTAF  Dismaland launches an animatronic Farige.



Well, at least we can add "drummer" to the list of things he's bloody useless at.


----------



## phillm (May 1, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Well, at least we can add "drummer" to the list of things he's bloody useless at.


It's morse code for I AM A CUNT.


----------



## existentialist (May 1, 2020)

phillm said:


> It's morse code for I AM A CUNT.


Ah. I never was that good at Morse code


----------



## belboid (May 1, 2020)




----------



## teqniq (May 1, 2020)

A bit of local (to me) talent.


----------



## xes (May 1, 2020)

wicked rave last night


----------



## Marty1 (May 1, 2020)

Icke falls foul of Facey 5G shocker!! 









						Coronavirus: David Icke kicked off Facebook — BBC News
					

Mr Icke's page was removed for publishing "health misinformation that could cause physical harm".




					apple.news


----------



## ice-is-forming (May 2, 2020)




----------



## BristolEcho (May 2, 2020)

Thought we'd get the boy in on it.


----------



## gentlegreen (May 2, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (May 2, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 2, 2020)

Belfast


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 2, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (May 2, 2020)

Lockdown lingo - are you fully conversant with the new terminology?

• *Coronacoaster* •

The ups and downs of your mood during the pandemic. You’re loving lockdown one minute but suddenly weepy with anxiety the next. It truly is “an emotional coronacoaster”.

• *Quarantinis* •

Experimental cocktails mixed from whatever random ingredients you have left in the house. The boozy equivalent of a store cupboard supper. Southern Comfort and Ribena quarantini with a glacé cherry garnish, anyone? These are sipped at “locktail hour”, ie. wine o’clock during lockdown, which seems to be creeping earlier with each passing week.

• *Le Creuset wrist* •

It’s the new “avocado hand” - an aching arm after taking one’s best saucepan outside to bang during the weekly ‘Clap For Carers.’ It might be heavy but you’re keen to impress the neighbours with your high-quality kitchenware.

• *Coronials *•

As opposed to millennials, this refers to the future generation of babies conceived during coronavirus quarantine. They might also become known as “Generation C” or, more spookily, “Children of the Quarn”.

• *Furlough Merlot* •

Wine consumed in an attempt to relieve the frustration of not working. Also known as “bored-eaux” or “cabernet tedium”.

• *Coronadose* •

An overdose of bad news from consuming too much media during a time of crisis. Can result in a panicdemic.

• *The elephant in the Zoom* •
The glaring issue during a videoconferencing call that nobody feels able to mention. E.g. one participant has dramatically put on weight, suddenly sprouted terrible facial hair or has a worryingly messy house visible in the background.

• *Quentin Quarantino *•

An attention-seeker using their time in lockdown to make amateur films which they’re convinced are funnier and cleverer than they actually are.

• *Goutbreak* •

The sudden fear that you’ve consumed so much wine, cheese, home-made cake and Easter chocolate in lockdown that your ankles are swelling up like a medieval king’s.

• *Antisocial distancing* •

Using health precautions as an excuse for snubbing neighbours and generally ignoring people you find irritating.

• *Coughin’ dodger *•

Someone so alarmed by an innocuous splutter or throat-clear that they back away in terror.

• *Mask-ara* •

Extra make-up applied to "make one's eyes pop" before venturing out in public wearing a face mask.

• *Covid-10* •

The 10 kgs in weight that we’re all gaining from comfort-eating and comfort-drinking. Also known as “fattening the curve


----------



## Teaboy (May 2, 2020)

That's actually really good.


----------



## two sheds (May 2, 2020)

Yes the antisocial distancing is particularly apt


----------



## Badgers (May 2, 2020)

Outstanding


----------



## chainsawjob (May 2, 2020)

I like Le Creuset wrist (impressing your neighbours with your cookware  ), and making your eyes pop, Mask-ara


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 2, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Yes the antisocial distancing is particularly apt


To be fair that's pretty normal for me anyway.


----------



## two sheds (May 2, 2020)

Yep me too it's a great excuse though


----------



## krink (May 2, 2020)

the last one hurt. i'm such a fat bastard now.


----------



## ruffneck23 (May 2, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> Lockdown lingo - are you fully conversant with the new terminology?
> 
> • *Coronacoaster* •
> 
> ...


im stealing that please.. ?


----------



## chainsawjob (May 2, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> im stealing that please.. ?


I nicked it, so be my guest


----------



## gentlegreen (May 2, 2020)




----------



## xes (May 2, 2020)

I actually just had a quarantini!  

Well, I made a strawberry ribena  drink and thought fuckit, and sploshed some apple DJ in if that counts.


----------



## HAL9000 (May 2, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (May 3, 2020)




----------



## petee (May 3, 2020)




----------



## Lurdan (May 3, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 3, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (May 3, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 3, 2020)

.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 3, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (May 3, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 3, 2020)

From a Spanish English language site


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 3, 2020)

I want this on a t-shirt.


----------



## quiet guy (May 3, 2020)

Today I bought a box of Cornflakes, or as Matt Hancock would say 7122 food items.


----------



## teqniq (May 3, 2020)




----------



## Mation (May 3, 2020)




----------



## gosub (May 4, 2020)

Mation said:


>




tbf he does have better numbers on that (and its not an unreasonable method) than IUK, Italy, Spain or France Coronavirus Update (Live): 3,561,976 Cases and 248,086 Deaths from COVID-19 Virus Pandemic - Worldometer. What UK is really bad is the ratio of deaths per million per cases per million though that in part could be attributed to shit testing numbers


----------



## Mation (May 4, 2020)

gosub said:


> tbf he does have better numbers on that (and its not an unreasonable method) than IUK, Italy, Spain or France Coronavirus Update (Live): 3,561,976 Cases and 248,086 Deaths from COVID-19 Virus Pandemic - Worldometer. What UK is really bad is the ratio of deaths per million per cases per million though that in part could be attributed to shit testing numbers


I think it was more that the way he put it sounded like he thinks bigger numbers are better.


----------



## gosub (May 4, 2020)

Mation said:


> I think it was more that the way he put it sounded like he thinks bigger numbers are better.


But he doesn't though.  If the UK had US's deaths per million we would have half the dead.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 4, 2020)

I think we also have to look at population density too.


----------



## gosub (May 4, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> I think we also have to look at population density too.


Bloke on the Marr show from National Office of Statitcs was very interesting today The Andrew Marr Show - 03/05/2020 15mins in.


----------



## Mation (May 4, 2020)

gosub said:


> But he doesn't though.  If the UK had US's deaths per million we would have half the dead.


He may not sound like that to you, but he does to some others, including me - whether or not that's what he meant. So the clip is (morbidly) funny if you hear him as saying "look how many we've got!" all proudly and boastfully. The 'joke' isn't about comparing the number of deaths with other countries, even though he makes a comparison.


----------



## fishfinger (May 4, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (May 4, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 4, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 210627


You should see what she thinks about The WHO.


----------



## High Voltage (May 4, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 4, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 4, 2020)

COVID-19 'Dining Pods' in the Netherlands


----------



## bellaozzydog (May 4, 2020)

what you need to do is join a union comrade 




Marty1 said:


> Yeah, I’ve been called a ‘hero’ and told I’m ‘doing a fantastic job’ and lots of over gushing’s of ‘ thank you so, so much’ this week already and I’m just delivering parcels ffs.
> 
> I mean, I appreciate the spirit but as soon as this is all over I’ll be told to shut the gate on the way out, parcels grabbed out of hands without any acknowledgement and generally become invisible again


----------



## Orang Utan (May 4, 2020)

A load of these have been donated to our foodbank. Isn’t Beechwood a group of veterinary practices? And what is RSPCA doing on the label? Is it really bacon?


----------



## hegley (May 4, 2020)

RSPCA have a quality assurance scheme for meat - probably to do with that.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 4, 2020)

I reckon it’s pets


----------



## quiet guy (May 4, 2020)

The Beechwood refers to the smoking process for curing the meat rather than the Vet practice.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 4, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> The Beechwood refers to the smoking process for curing the meat rather than the Vet practice.


I know but that isn’t funny


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 4, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 4, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 4, 2020)

The sequel ^^


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 4, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (May 4, 2020)

Dont think she's put that up to be honest but its food for thought.
”They reopen factories and put us in danger for their profits. The rich are our mortal enemies.”

 Banner seen on a balcony in France.


----------



## quiet guy (May 4, 2020)

Gulls ahoy

Hopefully the link works now.


----------



## spring-peeper (May 4, 2020)

The link you followed may be broken, or the page may have been removed.


----------



## Mab (May 4, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 210710


yeah, same thing at mine! They have also upped the land mine number on purpose!


----------



## spring-peeper (May 4, 2020)

**waves at Mab *

Hope things are good for you guys down there 

Stay safe.


----------



## petee (May 4, 2020)




----------



## Supine (May 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 5, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (May 5, 2020)

Pinched from Newsthump

Pritti Patel is to star in a new Narnia film called "The lying old witch in the cabinet".


----------



## dessiato (May 5, 2020)

This one caps it


----------



## The39thStep (May 5, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

I'm getting an outfit ready for supermarket shopping.

I have the plague mask and hat sorted. Just gotta make or buy a hooded cape and we're good to go


----------



## Aladdin (May 5, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I'm getting an outfit ready for supermarket shopping.
> 
> I have the plague mask and hat sorted. Just gotta make or buy a hooded cape and we're good to go
> 
> View attachment 210939




Are you actually going to go like that? I'd piss myself laughing if you do. 
Take a photo in the shop. 
No photoshop job.
🤣


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> Are you actually going to go like that? I'd piss myself laughing if you do.
> Take a photo in the shop. 🤣
> No photoshop job.


I'm absolutely going to do it. I need a bit of fun in these times


----------



## Aladdin (May 5, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I'm absolutely going to do it. I need a bit of fun in these times



That is going to be feckin hilarious 🤣pics will be required 🤣


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> That is going to be feckin hilarious 🤣pics will be required 🤣


I'm hoping to get someone to video it but pics will definitely be happening.


----------



## Petcha (May 5, 2020)

All too relevant to my particular situation... 









						Lockdown restrictions relaxed for anyone in desperate need of a shag
					

THE government has announced that from today, an exception to lockdown and social distancing rules will be made for anyone seriously gagging for it.




					www.thedailymash.co.uk


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> That is going to be feckin hilarious 🤣pics will be required 🤣


I love the mask


----------



## Yossarian (May 5, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (May 5, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I love the mask



Weirdly reminded me of Cartoon Head from Ideal


----------



## cyril_smear (May 5, 2020)

Rutita1 said:


> View attachment 209804
> 
> Do the math...



maths


----------



## gosub (May 5, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> maths



No in this instance its math.  If it was maths covid =5


----------



## cyril_smear (May 5, 2020)

gosub said:


> No in this instance its math.  If it was maths covid =5



I don;'t get it


----------



## gosub (May 5, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> I don;'t get it



BARACK = 6 (letters)
HUSSEIN = 7 (letters)
OBAMA = 5 (letters)
 COVID has 5 letters


----------



## Aladdin (May 5, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I love the mask



Is that metal or leather?
Great mask 👍


----------



## cyril_smear (May 5, 2020)

gosub said:


> BARACK = 6 (letters)
> HUSSEIN = 7 (letters)
> OBAMA = 5 (letters)
> COVID has 5 letters



i still don't understand. its do the maths not do the math


----------



## gosub (May 5, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> i still don't understand. its do the maths not do the math



No, that poster needs as little association with noble and ration science of mathematics as possible.  Quite happy for it to be math, maths it isn't.


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> Is that metal or leather?
> Great mask 👍


It's imitation leather. I fitted a set of these for that even weirder look.





__





						ZAIQUN Steampunk Goggles Spiked Victorian Punk Welding Cosplay Gothic Rustic : Amazon.co.uk: Clothing
					

Shop ZAIQUN Steampunk Goggles Spiked Victorian Punk Welding Cosplay Gothic Rustic. Free delivery and returns on eligible orders.



					www.amazon.co.uk


----------



## gosub (May 5, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> It's imitation leather. I fitted a set of these for that even weirder look.
> 
> 
> 
> ...











						Coronavirus: Hellesdon plague doctor given advice by police
					

Officers identify the figure as a teenager and speak to him about "the consequences of his actions".



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## editor (May 5, 2020)

So I had someone sharing one of those anti-vaxx, 'Covid-19 is a global plan' videos on Facebook that insisted that it was so EXPLOSIVE that you had to watch it quickly because Youtube was going 'to take it down.'

Except what happened was that that the video stayed up - but he deleted all my comments for pointing out the wild flaws in the video's argument.  And then he tried to carry on the same argument, but deleted the entire thread when it wasn't going his way again. 

CENSORSHIP, RIGHT THERE!


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

gosub said:


> Coronavirus: Hellesdon plague doctor given advice by police
> 
> 
> Officers identify the figure as a teenager and speak to him about "the consequences of his actions".
> ...


🤣
Plod's equivelant of a strongly worded letter.
I'm arresting you for impersonating a crow


----------



## Epona (May 5, 2020)

gosub said:


> Coronavirus: Hellesdon plague doctor given advice by police
> 
> 
> Officers identify the figure as a teenager and speak to him about "the consequences of his actions".
> ...



"Consequences of his actions..." what that the police completely over-react to something that most people find quite darkly funny?  What other consequences?  I don't think anyone seeing him could possibly have had PTSD related flashbacks to do with their experiences in the time of the bubonic plague...


----------



## gosub (May 5, 2020)

Epona said:


> "Consequences of his actions..." what that the police completely over-react to something that most people find quite darkly funny?  What other consequences?  I don't think anyone seeing him could possibly have had PTSD related flashbacks to do with their experiences in the time of the bubonic plague...



Kids could end up painting some very fucked up rainbows.  As it is I think the LGBT community is in for a hard time in about 20 years time


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

Epona said:


> "Consequences of his actions..." what that the police completely over-react to something that most people find quite darkly funny?  What other consequences?  I don't think anyone seeing him could possibly have had PTSD related flashbacks to do with their experiences in the time of the bubonic plague...


The lad deserved a round of applause, not a visit from the fucking costume police. It's a strange world we're living in that allowed resources to be wasted on such nonsense.


----------



## Epona (May 5, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> The lad deserved a round of applause, not a visit from the fucking costume police. It's a strange world we're living in that allowed resources to be wasted on such nonsense.



A teenager, I just want to say if he's due to have history course marks in lieu of exams, I hope that understanding of a currently relevant period of history is recognised and results in a good grade


----------



## Epona (May 5, 2020)

I mean ffs "might frighten children" - so might anyone wearing a costume for any reason, it is then you take the time to explain to kids that "it is just someone in fancy dress".  It's not like a 4 year old is likely to know the origins of that particular costume and start worrying about the plague


----------



## gosub (May 5, 2020)

Epona said:


> A teenager, I just want to say if he's due to have history course marks in lieu of exams, I hope that understanding of a currently relevant period of history is recognised and results in a good grade


Will you still be saying that when spotty oik nails your door shut?


----------



## Epona (May 5, 2020)

gosub said:


> Will you still be saying that when spotty oik nails your door shut?



Except that didn't happen...

(And tbf if he's ok with some basic carpentry and DIY I could be mentoring him when everything goes back to normal  )


----------



## gosub (May 5, 2020)

Epona said:


> Except that didn't happen...


slippery slope


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 5, 2020)

Epona said:


> I mean ffs "might frighten children" - so might anyone wearing a costume for any reason, it is then you take the time to explain to kids that "it is just someone in fancy dress".  It's not like a 4 year old is likely to know the origins of that particular costume and start worrying about the plague


I wonder how may kids will be warned about the possible consequences of their actions on Halloween. Maybe a physical warning, or a little bit of taser action might help.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 5, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I wonder how may kids will be warned about the possible consequences of their actions on Halloween. Maybe a physical warning, or a little bit of taser action might help.



pity detective boy isn't around to discuss this


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 5, 2020)




----------



## editor (May 6, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (May 6, 2020)

gosub said:


> Coronavirus: Hellesdon plague doctor given advice by police
> 
> 
> Officers identify the figure as a teenager and speak to him about "the consequences of his actions".
> ...



Some of the reactions of locals are daft. 

"One person wrote: "Scared the life out of my missus. Terrifying for kids."

Another agreed: "Just casually... strolling around the village in a plague costume? That's just not normal is it, do it indoors it's bloody terrifying for poor little kids."

However, others came to the individual's defence, saying: "I admit he is weird but what harm is he doing... made me giggle."

Another pointed out: "It's not illegal and if he can't wear it now, when could he?"

"Danny Buck, a historian at the University of East Anglia, who spotted the picture, said: "It's quite a smart-looking costume and it's important people realise that in the 17th Century plague doctors were the brave ones who went out to see people with the disease."









						Coronavirus: Hellesdon walker's plague doctor outfit 'terrifying kids'
					

Police say they are keen to offer the individual some "words of advice" regarding the outfit choice.



					www.bbc.com
				




People contacting the police over it ? Ridiculous .


----------



## chainsawjob (May 6, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 6, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (May 6, 2020)

Do we really need massive pictures for shit one line jokes?  Not particularly aimed at this joke, I’m just seeing it more and more.


----------



## ruffneck23 (May 6, 2020)

kabbes said:


> Do we really need massive pictures for shit one line jokes?  Not particularly aimed at this joke, in just setting it more and more.


to be fair  ,that's half the size of the original pic. Gutted it didnt make smile though


----------



## kabbes (May 6, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> to be fair  ,that's half the size of the original pic. Gutted it didnt make smile though




I think the format of the presentation just makes me grumpy with these Instagram style jokes


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 6, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (May 6, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (May 6, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> People contacting the police over it ? Ridiculous .



I dunno.  I find it quite amusing but I can see how it would upset already very anxious people even further.  Whilst the original context of the mask was certainly brave people trying to help, the modern connotation is as a symbol of the plague visiting.  In that context it's a bit like dressing up as the grim reaper and standing outside a care home.

However, just a kid and no biggie really.


----------



## pesh (May 6, 2020)

it's like a fancy dress version of the banned songs list from the first Gulf war.


----------



## chainsawjob (May 6, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 6, 2020)




----------



## A380 (May 6, 2020)




----------



## JimW (May 6, 2020)




----------



## belboid (May 6, 2020)

JimW said:


>


posted the day that US deaths from the virus surpassed those in Vietnam.  Double plus points.


----------



## teqniq (May 6, 2020)

New Banksy artwork appears at Southampton hospital
					

The piece depicts a young boy discarding his superhero toys in favour of a model of an NHS nurse.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## cyril_smear (May 6, 2020)

JimW said:


>



I went out for a walk with father today and i've never seen the local street so busy.


----------



## Badgers (May 6, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 6, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 211185



im no boris fan but have i missed somet? whos missus did he shag?


----------



## Orang Utan (May 6, 2020)

teqniq said:


> New Banksy artwork appears at Southampton hospital
> 
> 
> The piece depicts a young boy discarding his superhero toys in favour of a model of an NHS nurse.
> ...


Really makes you think, doesn't it?


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 6, 2020)

some of my colleagues are working from home, so we're having occasional video chats.

various cats / dogs are making occasional appearances.

one colleague's cat has a tendency to run downstairs and wait by the door if the doorbell rings.

another colleague can play a doorbell sound on his mobile phone


----------



## Clair De Lune (May 6, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Really makes you think, doesn't it?


tbh it made me groan


----------



## Orang Utan (May 6, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> tbh it made me groan


i always say that everytime Banksy does something really shit and obvious


----------



## two sheds (May 6, 2020)

The nurses liked it.


----------



## gosub (May 6, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Really makes you think, doesn't it?



Does.  They could rip the wall out and pay for another couple of nurses


----------



## Doodler (May 7, 2020)

,


----------



## teqniq (May 7, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 7, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 7, 2020)

The Turkish PPE was fine, assures Head of Purchasing Derek Trotter
					

Derek Trotter, the South London entrepreneur appointed by the government to purchase medical supplies, denied that he was a well-connected chancer who was in above his head when the 400,000 items of PPE recently had to be scrapped for being unusable.




					newsthump.com


----------



## chainsawjob (May 7, 2020)

Can't be arsed to do a rainbow?



fuckthetories.co.uk


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 7, 2020)




----------



## Buddy Bradley (May 7, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 7, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (May 8, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 8, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> View attachment 211257


Ubisoft has really slashed the budget on the next assassins creed.


----------



## dessiato (May 8, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (May 8, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Ubisoft has really slashed the budget on the next assassins creed.


I sent my nephew that picture and he said "That reminds me, I need to finish Assassin's creed. 🤣".
Never having played it, despite owning it, I looked it up, and I see the resemblance, but I'm way more handsome, although maybe not as good at jumping across rooftops.


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 8, 2020)

Almost finished. 
I made a mantle from an old leather jacket.


----------



## Marty1 (May 8, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Almost finished.
> I made a mantle from an old leather jacket.



You’re ready.

The time has come (for your plague docs first public outing)


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 8, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> You’re ready.
> 
> The time has come (for your plague docs first public outing)


Nobody likes you Marty1. Why don't you just go away?


----------



## Marty1 (May 8, 2020)

Count Cuckula said:


> Nobody likes you Marty1. Why don't you just go away?





Spoiler


----------



## Jay Park (May 8, 2020)

Count Cuckula said:


> The Turkish PPE was fine, assures Head of Purchasing Derek Trotter
> 
> 
> Derek Trotter, the South London entrepreneur appointed by the government to purchase medical supplies, denied that he was a well-connected chancer who was in above his head when the 400,000 items of PPE recently had to be scrapped for being unusable.
> ...


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 8, 2020)

Marty1 I suspected you were ugly


----------



## Marty1 (May 8, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 8, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 8, 2020)

Third Russian Doctor Falls From Hospital Window After Coronavirus Complaint - The Moscow Times


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 8, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 8, 2020)

I was thinking about PPE  and remembered this old chestnut




__





						Ulli's Roy Orbison in Cling-film site
					





					michaelkelly.artofeurope.com
				




A fetish that was before it's time


----------



## Mation (May 8, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> I was thinking about PPE  and remembered this old chestnut
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Another of my old faves! Keep 'em coming, please


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 8, 2020)

Mation said:


> Another of my old faves! Keep 'em coming, please


Phrasing!


----------



## Mation (May 8, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Phrasing!


Just be thankful I spotted autocorrect's bullshit and changed back me to 'em!


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 8, 2020)

Mation said:


> Just be thankful I spotted autocorrect's bullshit and changed back me to 'em!


owch. i'd have had to reply 'that's roy's job not mine'


----------



## Mation (May 8, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> owch. i'd have had to reply 'that's roy's job not mine'


This isn't really going in any hoped for direction


----------



## MrSki (May 8, 2020)




----------



## killer b (May 8, 2020)

This just in from a friend on Facebook. Incredible scenes.


----------



## teqniq (May 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 8, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (May 8, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (May 8, 2020)




----------



## Baronage-Phase (May 8, 2020)

Count Cuckula said:


> Nobody likes you Marty1. Why don't you just go away?


Who are you?


----------



## SpookyFrank (May 8, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 8, 2020)

nicked , please


----------



## gosub (May 9, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> View attachment 211542



That would require wearing a mask.


----------



## petee (May 9, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (May 9, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 9, 2020)




----------



## eatmorecheese (May 9, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (May 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 9, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 9, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 9, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (May 9, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 211609


I wonder why the sign is in English, when the place looks more like France...?


----------



## Badgers (May 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 9, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 9, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (May 9, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (May 9, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 211590



I think ketamine can be be used for pain management in ICU.      Problem with morphine is that it suppresses breathing

I don't know if this site is a good source for medical info, but I found this...




> Ideal new treatments for Novel Coronavirus-19 (COVID-19) would help halt the progression disease in patients with mild disease prior to the need for artificial respiration (ventilators), and also provide a rescue treatment for patients with severe disease, while also being affordable and available in quantities sufficient to treat large numbers of infected people. Low doses of Naltrexone, a drug approved for treating alcoholism and opiate addiction, as well as Ketamine, a drug approved as an anesthetic, may be able to interrupt the inflammation that causes the worst COVID-19 symptoms and prove an effective new treatment. This study will investigate their effectiveness in a randomized, blinded trial versus standard treatment plus placebo.











						Study of Immunomodulation Using Naltrexone and Ketamine for COVID-19 - Full Text View - ClinicalTrials.gov
					

Study of Immunomodulation Using Naltrexone and Ketamine for COVID-19 - Full Text View.




					clinicaltrials.gov


----------



## editor (May 9, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 10, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 10, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 10, 2020)

ffs cant link to it properly


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 10, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 10, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (May 10, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 10, 2020)




----------



## zora (May 10, 2020)

^^^ That's amazing, I can't stop clicking on it!


----------



## teqniq (May 10, 2020)

More fun being had with the 'Stay alert' slogan:


----------



## Badgers (May 10, 2020)




----------



## editor (May 10, 2020)

Here's a load of them


----------



## Petcha (May 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




Wheres the generator?


----------



## Badgers (May 10, 2020)

Petcha said:


> Wheres the generator?


What?


----------



## Petcha (May 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


> What?



I thought there must be a generator thing where you type your slogan in? I can't see a link to it on that twitter link.


----------



## 2hats (May 10, 2020)

Petcha said:


> I thought there must be a generator thing where you type your slogan in? I can't see a link to it on that twitter link.


Halt the animated GIF at any random moment in time.


----------



## Petcha (May 10, 2020)

Ah I thought we could enter our own nonsensical claptrap


----------



## The39thStep (May 10, 2020)




----------



## gosub (May 10, 2020)

Petcha said:


> Ah I thought we could enter our own nonsensical claptrap


If you're working for Dom Cummings, you'll have to try harder than that


----------



## Orang Utan (May 10, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>



Like the very very full glass of rose/ribena


----------



## dessiato (May 10, 2020)




----------



## eatmorecheese (May 10, 2020)

Don't open the door to a feckless infected, kids...


----------



## cybershot (May 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 10, 2020)




----------



## steveo87 (May 10, 2020)

If you had to take a shot every time someone, specifically on TV, said something a long the the lines of 'In these strange times', just how drunk would you be?


----------



## prunus (May 10, 2020)

steveo87 said:


> If you had to take a shot every time someone, specifically on TV, said something a long the the lines of 'In these strange times', just how drunk would you be?



Not as drunk as I am anyway.


----------



## gosub (May 10, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (May 10, 2020)




----------



## gosub (May 10, 2020)




----------



## gosub (May 10, 2020)

pah to murder hornets


----------



## N_igma (May 10, 2020)

For people who missed Boris tonight:


----------



## HalloweenJack (May 11, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (May 11, 2020)




----------



## Mation (May 11, 2020)

05:22 Staying alert.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)

Mation said:


> 05:22 Staying alert.


Make sure you wear your electron microscope glasses when out and about so you can spot the virus lurking and ready to pounce.


----------



## fucthest8 (May 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 11, 2020)




----------



## bmd (May 11, 2020)

So, to recap:

Stay at home, unless you go to work.
Don't use public transport, unless you need to.
Invite friends and family round but be out when they call.
Keep watching the virus, when you're near it.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 11, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 11, 2020)

What a time to be alive


----------



## MrSki (May 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 11, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (May 11, 2020)

Love Janey Godley


----------



## Badgers (May 11, 2020)




----------



## Big Bertha (May 11, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 11, 2020)




----------



## belboid (May 11, 2020)

You can get money for your first communion?  Why did no one tell me!


----------



## A380 (May 11, 2020)




----------



## keybored (May 11, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



The funniest bit is all the FullBlownPsychoticEpisode types in the replies, thinking he's being serious.


----------



## May Kasahara (May 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 11, 2020)




----------



## lefteri (May 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 11, 2020)




----------



## May Kasahara (May 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)

May Kasahara said:


> View attachment 211968


I did think about posting that earlier, but thought the image was too distressing.


----------



## T & P (May 11, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 211599


Given that 2016 brought us the Brexit referendum, that's the biggest load of bollocks ever. Even worse year than 2020.


----------



## A380 (May 11, 2020)

A condensed version of the PM’s speech.


----------



## gosub (May 11, 2020)

T & P said:


> Given that 2016 brought us the Brexit referendum, that's the biggest load of bollocks ever. Even worse year than 2020.


So when we're you planning on  letting the electorate have a say? I suppose you probably think it madness not to extend the transition too


----------



## cybershot (May 11, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 11, 2020)




----------



## A380 (May 11, 2020)




----------



## A380 (May 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 11, 2020)




----------



## IC3D (May 11, 2020)




----------



## hegley (May 11, 2020)




----------



## A380 (May 11, 2020)

I can’t  take credit for this...

--‐-------------------

I think I’ve worked it out... 

4 year olds can go to school but university students who have paid for their tuition and the accommodation that they aren’t living in, can’t go back to university.
I can go to school with many 4 year olds that I’m not related to but can’t see one 4 year old that I am related to.
I can sit in a park, but not tomorrow or Tuesday but by Wednesday that’ll be fine.
I can meet one person from another household for a chat or to sunbathe but not two people so if I know two people  from another household I have to pick my favourite. Hopefully, I’m also their favourite person from my household or this could be awkward. But possibly I’m not. In fact, thinking about it, I definitely wouldn’t be. But as I can’t go closer than 2m to the one I choose anyway so you wouldn’t think having the other one sat next to them would matter - unless two people would restrict my eyeline too much and prevent me from being alert.
I can work all day with my colleagues but I can’t sit in their garden for a chat after work.
I can now do unlimited exercise when quite frankly just doing an hour a day felt like I was some kind of fitness guru. I can think of lots of things that I would like to be unlimited but exercise definitely isn’t one of them.
I can drive to other destinations although which destinations is unclear. I was supposed to be in Brighton this weekend. Can I drive there? It’s hundreds of miles away but no one has said that’s wrong.
The buses are still running past my house but I shouldn’t get on one. We should just let empty buses drive around so bus drivers aren’t doing nothing.
It will soon be time to quarantine people coming into the country by air... but not yet. It’s too soon. And not ever if you’re coming from France because... well, I don’t do know why, actually. Because the French version of coronavirus wouldn’t come to the UK maybe.
Our youngest children go back to school first because... they are notoriously good at not touching things they shouldn’t, maintain personal space at all times and never randomly lick you.
We are somewhere in between 3.5 and 4.5 on a five point scale where 5 is all of the virus and 1 is none of the virus but 2,3 and 4 can be anything you’d like it to be really. Some of the virus? A bit of the virus? Just enough virus to see off those over 70s who were told to self isolate but now we’ve realised that they’ve done that a bit too well  despite us offloading coronavirus patients into care homes and now we are claiming that was never said in the first place, even though it’s in writing in the stay at home guidance.
The slogan isn’t stay at home any more.So we don’t have to say at home. Except we do. Unless we can’t. In which case we should go out. But there will be fines if we break the rules. So don’t do that. Don’t forget... Stay alert... which Robert Jenrick has explained actually means Stay home as much as possible. Obviously. Control the virus. Well, I can’t even control my kids home learning and I can actually see them. Plus I know a bit about kids and very little about controlling viruses. Save lives. Always preferable to not saving lives, I’d say, so I’ll try my best with that one, although hopefully I don’t need telling to do that. I know I’m bragging now but not NOT saving lives is something I do every day. So there you are.  If you’re the weirdo wanting unlimited exercise then enjoy. But not until Wednesday. Obviously.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 11, 2020)

hegley said:


> View attachment 212001



The UK HQ of the Church of Scientology is just up the road, south of East Grinstead, bloody nutters.



cupid_stunt said:


> Oh, yes, EG is the UK HQ of the fuckwits known as the Church of Scientology, I could tell you a few stories about Saint Hill, including how I helped a young lady to escape that weird place.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


----------



## hegley (May 11, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> The UK HQ of the Church of Scientology is just up the road, south of East Grinstead, bloody nutters.


yeah, I'm from down that way originally - some other much smaller culty type groups in and around Ashdown Forest as well. And that total wrong'un, Winnie the Pooh of course.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 11, 2020)

hegley said:


> yeah, I'm from down that way originally - some other much smaller culty type groups in and around Ashdown Forest as well. And that total wrong'un, Winnie the Pooh of course.



It's like Glastonbury, with less hippies, but even more nutters.

* Considered opinion from someone that spent several years living within a few miles of both.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 11, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (May 11, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> It's like Glastonbury, with less hippies, but even more nutters.
> 
> * Considered opinion from someone that spent several years living within a few miles of both.



It takes something where the Anthropops are the least weird in an area. 

Those sinos won't catch anything because they don't know any Suppressive Persons though. Only catch things if you're in contact with an SP.


----------



## teqniq (May 11, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (May 11, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 11, 2020)

Boris advising people to go out looking like letterboxes
					

Prime Minister and part-time Honey Monster impersonator, Boris Johnson, has encouraged everyone to go out wearing attire that makes them look like letterboxes.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Marty1 (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (May 12, 2020)

Fail


----------



## SpookyFrank (May 12, 2020)

T & P said:


> Given that 2016 brought us the Brexit referendum, that's the biggest load of bollocks ever. Even worse year than 2020.



56,000 excess deaths dude. And counting.


----------



## cybershot (May 12, 2020)

Create your own stay alert slogan 
	

			Hello!


----------



## chainsawjob (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (May 12, 2020)




----------



## eatmorecheese (May 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Numbers (May 12, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (May 12, 2020)

eatmorecheese said:


> View attachment 212108


I just had an argument with someone on FB about something along these lines - his argument is that the Welsh Government should stop being awkward and fall in with "Boris'" plan. I pointed out that a lot of people, me included, thought "Boris'" plan was dangerous and ill-conceived, but he feels that since Wales is supposed to "co-operate" with London, we should just be knuckling under. In the end, as he always does, he flounced in the face of my relentless politeness.


----------



## eatmorecheese (May 12, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I just had an argument with someone on FB about something along these lines - his argument is that the Welsh Government should stop being awkward and fall in with "Boris'" plan. I pointed out that a lot of people, me included, thought "Boris'" plan was dangerous and ill-conceived, but he feels that since Wales is supposed to "co-operate" with London, we should just be knuckling under. In the end, as he always does, he flounced in the face of my relentless politeness.



Just bizarre. I'm trying to complete on a house in Wales and so I feel invested in this, but why would anyone feel that Bojo's interventions are anything other than theatrics? There is no plan. The Welsh government should do what it can. I'll remain in London until I can move


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 12, 2020)

eatmorecheese said:


> View attachment 212108


Once a tory always a cunt.


----------



## cybershot (May 12, 2020)

eatmorecheese said:


> View attachment 212108



He should try living in Birmingham. Beaches. ha.


----------



## Sprocket. (May 12, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 12, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> View attachment 212119


I'd love to see all the questions submitted - bet there are loads taking the piss like that.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 12, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I'd love to see all the questions submitted - bet there are loads taking the piss like that.


----------



## souljacker (May 12, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 212121


Seeing as we can now travel further, I'm going to the seaside to feed the lovely seagulls.  Southern coast first naturally.


----------



## Sasaferrato (May 12, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> In case anyone still doesn't know how to wash their hands, here's legendary Indian batsman Sachin Tendulkar to show you:




Possibly the finest batsman ever to have walked the earth.


----------



## SpookyFrank (May 12, 2020)

Sasaferrato said:


> Possibly the finest batsman ever to have walked the earth.



Every few days I am struck by a wave of sadness as I remember there will be no cricket this summer


----------



## fishfinger (May 12, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Seeing as we can now travel further, I'm going to the seaside to feed the lovely seagulls.  Southern coast first naturally.


But you've seen how the gulls have evolved due to a lack of chips!



gosub said:


> pah to murder hornets


----------



## Sasaferrato (May 12, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Every few days I am struck by a wave of sadness as I remember there will be no cricket this summer


Me too.


----------



## two sheds (May 12, 2020)

Ever since it stopped getting shown on bbc I never get to see it anyway so less of a loss for me.


----------



## BristolEcho (May 12, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Ever since it stopped getting shown on bbc I never get to see it anyway so less of a loss for me.



Shit ain't it? I'm convinced the lack of sport on easy access TV has an impact on the amount of people that will take up the sport. I used to watch cricket and go to the park and play it inspired every summer as a kid.


----------



## kabbes (May 12, 2020)

Micky Flanagan is an unfunny twat


----------



## Numbers (May 12, 2020)

I think he’s hilarious.


----------



## Teaboy (May 12, 2020)

Sasaferrato said:


> Possibly the finest batsman ever to have walked the earth.



Yeah but I bet he insisted on being the 5th Indian batsman to produce a video of hand washing.  Just waiting till the soap gets nice and soft and the water pressure has died off a bit.


----------



## Sasaferrato (May 12, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> Yeah but I bet he insisted on being the 5th Indian batsman to produce a video of hand washing.  Just waiting till the soap gets nice and soft and the water pressure has died off a bit.



I always batted at four.    The benefit depended on the first three hanging in there long enough to tire out the bowlers a bit.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 12, 2020)

Can someone please explain the ‘out but not out out’ meme?


----------



## keybored (May 12, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Can someone please explain the ‘out but not out out’ meme?


Dunno, I don't understand cricket at all.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 12, 2020)

keybored said:


> Dunno, I don't understand cricket at all.


Me neither. It could be tennis though


----------



## clicker (May 12, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Can someone please explain the ‘out but not out out’ meme?


Out is a walk to the dry cleaners. Out out is everything we can't do now.


----------



## kabbes (May 12, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Can someone please explain the ‘out but not out out’ meme?


It’s nothing to do with cricket.  It’s a reference to a Micky Flanagan “comedy” routine.


----------



## existentialist (May 12, 2020)

eatmorecheese said:


> Just bizarre. I'm trying to complete on a house in Wales and so I feel invested in this, but why would anyone feel that Bojo's interventions are anything other than theatrics? There is no plan. The Welsh government should do what it can. I'll remain in London until I can move


This is a Brexit-supporting uncritical Tory whose mantra is made up of stuff like "This is not the time to be criticising the Government"...but you can be absolutely sure that if it wasn't HIS government, he'd be all over it. Nice enough chap away from politics, but fuck me, he's tedious on that particular topic.


----------



## gosub (May 12, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Can someone please explain the ‘out but not out out’ meme?


----------



## Orang Utan (May 12, 2020)

gosub said:


>



It took 40 seconds before I had to take it off, but I understand now. How does that man ever get work?


----------



## ddraig (May 12, 2020)

eatmorecheese said:


> View attachment 212108


Shit colonial tory attitude


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 12, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> But you've seen how the gulls have evolved due to a lack of chips!


Good for them - that'll give the haters something to worry about.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 12, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Me neither. It could be tennis though


Badminton is ever stupider than tennis or cricket.  I was always puzzled how anyone could invent such an idiotic game.


----------



## keybored (May 12, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Badminton is ever stupider than tennis or cricket.  I was always puzzled how anyone could invent such an idiotic game.


It works because a normal human will react to a white feathered object flying towards them by hitting it as hard as they can with a bat.


----------



## Sasaferrato (May 12, 2020)

DexterTCN said:


>




Superb!


----------



## Sasaferrato (May 12, 2020)

two sheds said:


> No social distancing, and they were putting their hands all over the doors and door handles.
> 
> Nice that the officer waved on the way out though



And the police wonder why the average citizen would no longer piss on them if they were on fire?


----------



## Sasaferrato (May 12, 2020)

Epona said:


> I used to live in Hoxton (BEFORE it became trendy - this was back when it was a shithole) and on Sundays would often go for a wander round the City, all the big financial institutions were closed on a Sunday and the place was largely deserted, other than the markets on the outskirts - was really nice



We lived in Woolwich in 1989. One Sunday, we took a tootle around through the city. How quiet it was, which sowed the the seed of an idea.

The next time we went North, we would go through the town, quicker than down to the M25 and round.

Of course, when we headed North on leave, it was six pm on a Friday.


----------



## Sprocket. (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (May 12, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 12, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> View attachment 212169


Referencing the US decision, now reversed, to disband their coronavirus taskforce.


----------



## Clair De Lune (May 12, 2020)




----------



## pesh (May 12, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Badminton is ever stupider than tennis or cricket.  I was always puzzled how anyone could invent such an idiotic game.


probably booze. we were drunk when we invented trampoline badminton. brilliant game.


----------



## Doodler (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (May 12, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (May 12, 2020)




----------



## Mation (May 13, 2020)

Enticing 😂









						Coronavirus: Holiday park booking requests surge
					

It says the rise follows the easing of restrictions in England, which do not apply in Wales.



					www.bbc.com


----------



## ruffneck23 (May 13, 2020)




----------



## bmd (May 13, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Once a tory always a cunt.



Rather like the common gull.


----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## A380 (May 13, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (May 13, 2020)

Mation said:


> Enticing 😂
> View attachment 212232
> 
> 
> ...


*"They felt entitled"* No shit!

Perhaps/hopefully a lot more people will now understand Wales is a different country!


----------



## Anju (May 13, 2020)

Favourite covid headline so far.


----------



## elbows (May 13, 2020)




----------



## elbows (May 13, 2020)

Also from Wefail.


----------



## Sprocket. (May 13, 2020)




----------



## editor (May 13, 2020)




----------



## belboid (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Fez909 (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## belboid (May 13, 2020)

Fez909 said:


> View attachment 212384


Loathe tho I am to admit it, and sorry for the source, but he damn well would.  









						Sam Allardyce blasts Matt Hancock's attack on footballers - 'What about bankers?'
					

FORMER Everton manager Sam Allardyce slammed Health Secretary Matt Hancock over his demand footballers take a pay cut to help during the coronavirus pandemic.




					www.express.co.uk


----------



## Yossarian (May 13, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (May 13, 2020)

If there’s holes in the what, now?


----------



## Buddy Bradley (May 13, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



That's Brazil.


----------



## mx wcfc (May 13, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)

Buddy Bradley said:


> That's Brazil.


Good to know


----------



## Badgers (May 13, 2020)




----------



## petee (May 13, 2020)

Inn at Little Washington Chef Will Fill His Socially Distanced Dining Room With Midcentury Mannequins - Washingtonian
					

A few weeks ago, the Inn at Little Washington sent out an email blast announcing that the luxury Rappahannock County destination would be reopening for dinner on May 15. Then Virginia governor Ralph Northam threw a hitch into chef Patrick O'Connell's plans: Diners can sit outside only for "phase...




					www.washingtonian.com
				










_The three Michelin-starred destination will also have Marilyn Monroe masks._


----------



## Mation (May 13, 2020)

petee said:


> Inn at Little Washington Chef Will Fill His Socially Distanced Dining Room With Midcentury Mannequins - Washingtonian
> 
> 
> A few weeks ago, the Inn at Little Washington sent out an email blast announcing that the luxury Rappahannock County destination would be reopening for dinner on May 15. Then Virginia governor Ralph Northam threw a hitch into chef Patrick O'Connell's plans: Diners can sit outside only for "phase...
> ...


Nothing creepy about that. Not at all. Nope.

All normal.

Normal normal normal.

Everything's FINE.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 13, 2020)

source


----------



## petee (May 14, 2020)

coronavirus porn titles.

"Essential Services" Firemen and police don't stop. Set design by Tom of Finland.
"Re-Open" Best to do it slowly, not all at once.
"Social Distancing" How lllong can you stay away?

(sorry, it's the vodka talking)


----------



## chainsawjob (May 14, 2020)




----------



## souljacker (May 14, 2020)

ddraig said:


> *W*ales is a different country!



Rhyl is even a different century.


----------



## Yossarian (May 14, 2020)

petee said:


> coronavirus porn titles.
> 
> "Essential Services" Firemen and police don't stop. Set design by Tom of Finland.
> "Re-Open" Best to do it slowly, not all at once.
> ...



"United Kingdom" - posh cunt fucks a whole country and nearly buggers himself.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 14, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 14, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 14, 2020)

Parliament can resume as long as the area is cleared of foul miasmas and witches, insists Jacob Rees-Mogg
					

Jacob Rees-Mogg, Leader Of the House of Commons and walking PSA about the dangers of marrying cousins, said that MPs should gather in Westminster and that, to ensure their safety, he had hired the nation’s finest witchfinders and leech-bearing crones.




					newsthump.com


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (May 14, 2020)

petee said:


> Inn at Little Washington Chef Will Fill His Socially Distanced Dining Room With Midcentury Mannequins - Washingtonian
> 
> 
> A few weeks ago, the Inn at Little Washington sent out an email blast announcing that the luxury Rappahannock County destination would be reopening for dinner on May 15. Then Virginia governor Ralph Northam threw a hitch into chef Patrick O'Connell's plans: Diners can sit outside only for "phase...
> ...


That looks like something from an episode of Dr Who.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 14, 2020)

Government confirms it will do everything to support nurses except pay them more
					

The British Government has marked International Nurses Day by vowing to do everything in their power to support nurses more during this time of crisis except pay them more money.




					newsthump.com


----------



## two sheds (May 14, 2020)

or improve their working conditions  

I was just wondering - if coronavirus can be detected in sewers does that mean you can also catch it from farts?


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 14, 2020)

Man trusted by Boris Johnson to use his common sense just arrived in A&E with shampoo bottle up his arse
					

A man trusted by Boris Johnson to keep the nation safe by applying his 'common sense' is currently explaining to a triage nurse how he got a shampoo bottle up his arse.




					newsthump.com
				




Couldn't resist posting this aswell


----------



## Voley (May 14, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (May 14, 2020)

Voley said:


> View attachment 212590


I'm glad it's not just me. I was starting to feel a little inadequate.


----------



## Aladdin (May 14, 2020)

🤪


----------



## eatmorecheese (May 14, 2020)

Chris Grayling announces he's pregnant after taking Covid-19 antibody test - The Rochdale Herald
					

Chris Grayling has revealed he's pregnant after he took the new Covid-19 antibody test.  A spokesman said, "It came as quite a surprise for Chris that he -




					rochdaleherald.co.uk


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 14, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (May 14, 2020)

two sheds said:


> or improve their working conditions
> 
> I was just wondering - if coronavirus can be detected in sewers does that mean you can also catch it from farts?











						How sewer science could ease testing pressure and track COVID-19
					

The science of sewage surveillance could be deployed in countries across the world to help monitor the spread of national epidemics of COVID-19 while reducing the need for mass testing, scientists say.




					uk.reuters.com
				












						Coronavirus Disease 2019 (COVID-19)
					

Coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) is a virus (more specifically, a coronavirus) identified as the cause of an outbreak of respiratory illness first detected in Wuhan, China.




					www.cdc.gov


----------



## two sheds (May 14, 2020)

They don't specifically mention farts   that's just shoddy research and reporting.


----------



## chainsawjob (May 14, 2020)




----------



## eatmorecheese (May 14, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (May 14, 2020)

.


----------



## The39thStep (May 14, 2020)

Bars opening in Portugal next Monday , still waiting for the specific advice but .................


----------



## Marty1 (May 14, 2020)




----------



## petee (May 14, 2020)

Dr. Fauci Warns Of Needless Suffering And Death If America Allowed To Continue
					

WASHINGTON—Emphasizing the dire consequences should the sovereign nation remain in existence, NIAID director Dr. Anthony Fauci warned the public Tuesday of needless suffering and death if America were allowed to continue. “Let me be clear, if the United States of America persists into 2021, not...




					www.theonion.com
				




_Dr. Anthony Fauci warned the public Tuesday of needless suffering and death if America were allowed to continue. “Let me be clear, if the United States of America persists into 2021, not only will many people die, but left unchecked, this federal republic will unleash untold destruction on the world,” _


----------



## ruffneck23 (May 14, 2020)




----------



## petee (May 14, 2020)

wear a mask 'cause stone cold said so


----------



## Mrs Miggins (May 15, 2020)

Ah....America....


----------



## chainsawjob (May 15, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (May 15, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Ah....America....
> 
> View attachment 212627


The message might be shit but that’s actually quite an acceptable pun on the name of the NY governor, no?


----------



## Teaboy (May 15, 2020)

kabbes said:


> The message might be shit but that’s actually quite an acceptable pun on the name of the NY governor, no?



Yes, I thought it was a decent effort.  The token punctuation was a nice touch as well.  A real shame they felt the need for block capitals. 7/10.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (May 15, 2020)

kabbes said:


> The message might be shit but that’s actually quite an acceptable pun on the name of the NY governor, no?


No idea


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 15, 2020)




----------



## May Kasahara (May 15, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> Yes, I thought it was a decent effort.  The token punctuation was a nice touch as well.  A real shame they felt the need for block capitals. 7/10.



Yes, would have scored higher if it was in Comic Sans.


----------



## Mrs Miggins (May 15, 2020)

kabbes said:


> The message might be shit but that’s actually quite an acceptable pun on the name of the NY governor, no?


Just looked that up....now I feel like a right dick


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 15, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (May 15, 2020)

LOL


----------



## dessiato (May 15, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Bars opening in Portugal next Monday , still waiting for the specific advice but .................



From my place I can see four bars, only one is open. It's the one I don't like.


----------



## The39thStep (May 15, 2020)

dessiato said:


> From my place is can see four bars, only one is open. It's the one I don't like.


Bars doing food have been open for takeaways for about three weeks. Menus very limited  and most you have to order by phone. You can takeaway beer ie stand and drink it in the car park or outside ( although the Police have moved people further away)  and and quite a few sit in their car and get bottles brought to them to drink in the car listening to music. The regulations  re re-opening will be limits on numbers indoors, tables spaced apart, limits on diners at each table, one bar owner said that they would have to put perspex up at the bar etc. Outside will be easier with social distancing, locally the councils are relaxing the rules on size of areas outside bars providing there is no safety issues re traffic. The week before the closures people did sit further apart, even playing cards and hand shaking stopped so I think people will adapt not quite convinced that some of the smaller bars will though. I think some are going to find it very difficult. Ive really missed grilled fish and sea food and the sardine season is due to start so thats something I'm going to pig myself out on. 
You still mainly in the flat?


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 15, 2020)

Government finalising strategy to blame you for coronavirus deaths
					

After weeks of confusion and U-turns, the government has developed a comprehensive plan to make you solely responsible for any further spread of COVID 19, as all deaths from now on mean you obviously took the wrong decisions and lacked common sense.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Aladdin (May 15, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (May 15, 2020)




----------



## belboid (May 15, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> View attachment 212669


That is not their home and it is two households mixing. 

arrest them now.


----------



## Aladdin (May 15, 2020)

belboid said:


> That is not their home and it is two households mixing.
> 
> arrest them now.



They do appear to be social distancing from each other though. 😁


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 15, 2020)

belboid said:


> That is not their home and it is two households mixing.
> 
> arrest them now.


And throw away the key because the famous five were shit.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 15, 2020)

'We can all clap any teachers and pupils who die' reassures government
					

People concerned about the reopening of schools no longer have to worry - the government has said that any deaths in schools will be marked by a weekly clap.




					newsthump.com


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 15, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 15, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> Bars doing food have been open for takeaways for about three weeks. Menus very limited  and most you have to order by phone. You can takeaway beer ie stand and drink it in the car park or outside ( although the Police have moved people further away)  and and quite a few sit in their car and get bottles brought to them to drink in the car listening to music. The regulations  re re-opening will be limits on numbers indoors, tables spaced apart, limits on diners at each table, one bar owner said that they would have to put perspex up at the bar etc. Outside will be easier with social distancing, locally the councils are relaxing the rules on size of areas outside bars providing there is no safety issues re traffic. The week before the closures people did sit further apart, even playing cards and hand shaking stopped so I think people will adapt not quite convinced that some of the smaller bars will though. I think some are going to find it very difficult. Ive really missed grilled fish and sea food and the sardine season is due to start so thats something I'm going to pig myself out on.
> You still mainly in the flat?


Pretty much. The bars are open for 50% capacity but only outside. The only place doing delivery in the town is Burger King. It's a very small town. Part of me thinks we should have stayed at the beach but we've Netflix and Internet here. The beach house is in Granada so we'd be in phase 0 anyway. Here we're in phase 1.


----------



## The39thStep (May 15, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Pretty much. The bars are open for 50% capacity but only outside. The only place doing delivery in the town is Burger King. It's a very small town. Part of me thinks we should have stayed at the beach but we've Netflix and Internet here. The beach house is in Granada so we'd be in phase 0 anyway. Here we're in phase 1.


I couldn’t survive without the internet tbh . I must look up the rules on beaches tbh , weathers mixed at the moment but I could do with some time at the sea regardless


----------



## dessiato (May 15, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> I couldn’t survive without the internet tbh . I must look up the rules on beaches tbh , weathers mixed at the moment but I could do with some time at the sea regardless


I'm dreaming of chiringuitos beer and tapas.


----------



## gosub (May 15, 2020)




----------



## Anju (May 15, 2020)




----------



## phillm (May 15, 2020)




----------



## 2hats (May 15, 2020)

Sorry. Who invented what?


----------



## gosub (May 15, 2020)

2hats said:


> Sorry. Who invented what?


He surfed tech development pretty well but he's not Steve Wozniak


----------



## phillm (May 15, 2020)

2hats said:


> Sorry. Who invented what?


Artistic licence in the context of a throwaway meme,  mlud.  Like the Pamella Bordes / Andrew Neil photo maybe a good time ro reprise this one.


----------



## 2hats (May 15, 2020)

gosub said:


> He surfed tech development pretty well but he's not Steve Wozniak


Indeed.


----------



## yield (May 15, 2020)

I thought it was Charles Babbage and Ada Lovelace?

Anyway there are still problems with Bill Gates philanthropy. 

Probably a mixed bag - like most things - but I'm always cynical about the billionaire class. 









						Gated Development - is the Gates Foundation always a force for good? - Global Justice Now
					

Every January, Bill Gates sets out his vision for a better world and the role the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation can play in achieving this in an annual letter […]




					www.globaljustice.org.uk


----------



## William of Walworth (May 15, 2020)

yield said:


> Anyway there are still problems with Bill Gates philanthropy.
> 
> Probably a mixed bag - like most things - *but I'm always cynical about the billionaire class.*



So'm I, and you're right to be.

But bonkers conspiraloons dreaming up 'Bill Nazi Gates forcing evil vaccinations onto the whole world!!!1!!!1!!' can still fuck the complete fuck off ! 

[ETA : I do appreciate that the above post (#3,076) was overdoing it a tad!   ]


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 15, 2020)

Bill Gates did not invent computers.

He pioneered bulk licensing operating systems to computer manufacturers.

He also was one of the people who saw Xerox's work on creating GUIs and  said 'make it like that'.

I consider him a facilitator of pc development  more than an innovator.


----------



## belboid (May 16, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Bill Gates did not invent computers.
> 
> He pioneered bulk licensing operating systems to computer manufacturers.
> 
> ...


steve jobs basically took some code - which had originally been written by people bring paid per line of code - and just stripped out all the extraneous shit to make a much faster (with less risk of miscopied lines) and turned it into Apple


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 16, 2020)

Dwarfs peeing on the shoulders of giants.


----------



## Mation (May 16, 2020)

phillm said:


> View attachment 212770


Yeah, that's one way to look at why he funded Khan Academy. A slightly fuller description would be 'free access to a high-quality capitalist educational agenda, with international reach, to small children who don't/didn't have access to any other information and whose parents didn't, either'.


----------



## chainsawjob (May 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 16, 2020)

Went well


----------



## William of Walworth (May 16, 2020)

belboid said:


> steve jobs basically took some code - which had originally been written by people bring paid per line of code - and just stripped out all the extraneous shit to make a much faster (with less risk of miscopied lines) and turned it into Apple



I think I sort-of understood that ....


----------



## wayward bob (May 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 16, 2020)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 16, 2020)

QVC is right now flogging a box of fish goujons for £27 + £5 delivery, 14 working days delivery, so nearly three weeks.
You can pay for this meal in two easy instalments  
This is is the best thing I have ever seen on TV


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 16, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> QVC is right now flogging a box of fish goujons for £27 + £5 delivery, 14 working days delivery, so nearly three weeks.
> You can pay for this meal in two easy instalments
> This is is the best thing I have ever seen on TV
> 
> View attachment 213027



WTF are you doing watching QVC?


----------



## Epona (May 16, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> WTF are you doing watching QVC?



It must be part of the new normal


----------



## phillm (May 16, 2020)

wayward bob said:


>


----------



## Epona (May 16, 2020)

phillm said:


>




I haven't watched the video (am still struggling on through the Eurovision stuff on TV) but since adverts started saying stuff like "this is a difficult time for us all...", I have interjected with "Buy a Toyota!" - well it amuses the husband.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (May 16, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> WTF are you doing watching QVC?



I fucking love it! We have never bought anything but it often provides moments of nuttiness. Tonight they moved on to thirty quid casseroles, then thirty quid chicken goujons! It’s mental.

When we first got freeview there was a thing called BidUpTv. The first time we tuned in there was some cunt flogging tat who was clearly E’d off his nut, pupils like a full moon, jigging about all over the screen and shouting “hardcore gabba!”every 10 seconds. Been hooked ever since.

And then BB1 started school and we got friendly with one of the mums, her husband was the MD of QVC, Frau Bahn and I just wet ourselves when we found out, think she was upset as most people were impressed, but we explained ourselves and he didn’t do a Ratner, though did acknowledge we had a point...They had to relocate to Paris and we sold them their Eurostar tickets.

Edit: they didn’t need to move to Paris cos of our mocking, QVC’s head office moved there from Battersea.


----------



## phillm (May 16, 2020)

When we were growing up only posh people could afford the weekly Corona round.


----------



## Badgers (May 16, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (May 16, 2020)

I used to know a director on QVC. They used to give the presenters challenges of what word they could squeeze into their spiel. 

Before I had these channels I used to make a friend put them on when I was at hers. As soon as I got all these channels at home I stopped watching them. 

My favourite was when they claimed the piping at the edge of some shitty cheap mattress you see in 'slum landlord shops' would prevent you from falling out. It is a real talent of sorts to be able to waffle on enthusiastically for half an hour about a waterfall cardi.


----------



## spitfire (May 16, 2020)

edit: didn't quote, oops. Bahnhof Strasse 

My mate used to work at Bid TV. Some of the presenters used to turn up completely off their nut as you saw. Some hid it better than others.


----------



## phillm (May 16, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 213036


In the spirit of adventure I once mixed tea and coffee to see how it tasted - awful was the answer was it toffee or cea ? Also ordered a Guinness shandy in a pub in the same vein- I shall die a happy man knowing that I turned up some unturned stones on the brief journey to oblivion - happy to report the barman declared it a first. 

_There are more things in heaven and earth that are undreamt of in our philosophy. _


----------



## quimcunx (May 16, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (May 16, 2020)

Watch them all:





						#ThankYouBakedPotato hashtag on Twitter
					

On May 12 @RealMattLucas tweeted: "Thank you to @OwainWynEvans for joining .." - read what others are saying and join the conversation.




					twitter.com


----------



## High Voltage (May 17, 2020)

phillm said:


> In the spirit of adventure I once mixed tea and coffee to see how it tasted - awful was the answer was it toffee or cea ? Also ordered a Guinness shandy in a pub in the same vein- I shall die a happy man knowing that I turned up some unturned stones on the brief journey to oblivion - happy to report the barman declared it a first.
> 
> _There are more things in heaven and earth that are undreamt of in our philosophy. _



A group of us got into an argument over which would float on what. Would Guinness float on lemonade or lemonade float on Guinness? 

So with an understanding barman and two pints of Guinness shandy later, we had our answer. 

The Guinness could be made to float on the lemonade in a cocktail style clearly defined layer


----------



## High Voltage (May 17, 2020)

And this would've been around 40 years ago


----------



## krtek a houby (May 17, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> And throw away the key because the famous five were shit.



And not so "famous", either. For a bunch of super sleuthing, crime-busting teens there's sod all in the newspaper archives about them. Maybe they were later recruited for some shadowy govt agency and their past adventures were erased?


----------



## krtek a houby (May 17, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> WTF are you doing watching QVC?



Quarantine Video Containment


----------



## dessiato (May 17, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (May 17, 2020)

Mation said:


> Yeah, that's one way to look at why he funded Khan Academy. A slightly fuller description would be 'free access to a high-quality capitalist educational agenda, with international reach, to small children who don't/didn't have access to any other information and whose parents didn't, either'.




I've used khanacademy for the maths lessons. They're excellent. Cant see how they promote anything but mathematics? 😳


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 17, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (May 17, 2020)




----------



## Mation (May 17, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> I've used khanacademy for the maths lessons. They're excellent. Cant see how they promote anything but mathematics? 😳


You haven't seen their other courses, then?


----------



## Aladdin (May 17, 2020)

Mation said:


> You haven't seen their other courses, then?



I've seen their science and engineering courses. I thought they were good.

And the computer courses, coding etc
.were good too. And for free.


----------



## gentlegreen (May 17, 2020)

A geek joke I'm not actually qualified to share ...


----------



## Numbers (May 17, 2020)

A subnet mask


----------



## dessiato (May 17, 2020)

Numbers said:


> A subnet mask


Which is what?


----------



## phillm (May 17, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 213108


Not wanting to piss on the cutie parade but isn't that a potential infection vector particularly if handled by multiple children over the day ?


----------



## extra dry (May 17, 2020)

Bill Gates/nightmare on elm street and vacines I am guessing


----------



## keybored (May 17, 2020)

Numbers said:


> A subnet mask


STAY AT 127.0.0.1


----------



## existentialist (May 17, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Which is what?


It's a bit pattern which you can logical-AND with an IP address to separate off subnet addresses from wider network ones. Well, you did ask!


----------



## cyril_smear (May 17, 2020)

Mrs Miggins said:


> Ah....America....
> 
> View attachment 212627


bloody auto-correct strikes again.


----------



## dessiato (May 17, 2020)

existentialist said:


> It's a bit pattern which you can logical-AND with an IP address to separate off subnet addresses from wider network ones. Well, you did ask!


What’s that in English, please?


----------



## gosub (May 17, 2020)

dessiato said:


> What’s that in English, please?


You get a range of IP addresses its how you split them so each computer on a network can be assigned and identified uniquely


----------



## phillm (May 17, 2020)

Bill Gates should go fuck it and buy one of these redundant cruise liners model it into the shape of a syringe and convert it to run on dollar bills to troll the loons.


----------



## existentialist (May 17, 2020)

dessiato said:


> What’s that in English, please?


"It's a bit pattern which you can logical-AND with an IP address to separate off subnet addresses from wider network ones."

It's one of those "if you need to ask, you probably don't need to know" things


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 17, 2020)




----------



## A380 (May 17, 2020)




----------



## phillm (May 17, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


>


You really can't beat Daleks. Though the good Doctor W often tries to do so.


----------



## A380 (May 17, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 17, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 213146



When I first heard it last Sunday it Castleford and featherstone.


----------



## A380 (May 17, 2020)

phillm said:


> You really can't beat Daleks. Though the good Doctor W often tries to do so.



There’s nothing wrong with beating your Dalek.


----------



## belboid (May 17, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> When I first heard it last Sunday it Castleford and featherstone.


That was rugby league


----------



## cyril_smear (May 17, 2020)

belboid said:


> That was rugby league



and a thousand other variations...


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 17, 2020)




----------



## phillm (May 17, 2020)

High Voltage said:


> A group of us got into an argument over which would float on what. Would Guinness float on lemonade or lemonade float on Guinness?
> 
> So with an understanding barman and two pints of Guinness shandy later, we had our answer.
> 
> The Guinness could be made to float on the lemonade in a cocktail style clearly defined layer


You've got to sweat the detail but serious drinkers thing we're taking the piss rather than buccaneering bar room drink scientists.

I would kill to go to a pub again. Remember those places from the 'old times' ?









						'It's a hate crime': Everyone is outraged by this Guinness pint
					

What a waste of a pint




					www.irishmirror.ie


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 17, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (May 17, 2020)

keybored said:


> STAY AT 127.0.0.1


There's no place like localhost.


----------



## cyril_smear (May 17, 2020)

phillm said:


> You've got to sweat the detail but serious drinkers thing we're taking the piss rather than buccaneering bar room drink scientists.
> 
> I would kill to go to a pub again. Remember those places from the 'old times' ?
> 
> ...



thats weird.

Also is it egbert whoused to peer over walls in 1980's satirical cartoons?


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 17, 2020)




----------



## ska invita (May 17, 2020)




----------



## josef1878 2.0 (May 17, 2020)

spitfire said:


> edit: didn't quote, oops. Bahnhof Strasse
> 
> My mate used to work at Bid TV. Some of the presenters used to turn up completely off their nut as you saw. Some hid it better than others.



I've seen the same on those middle of the night roulette programmes.....people who can't keep still or stop talking gibberish


----------



## A380 (May 18, 2020)

josef1878 2.0 said:


> I've seen the same on those middle of the night roulette programmes.....people who can't keep still or stop talking gibberish


But what could possibly cause such behaviour ？  it’s baffling.


----------



## High Voltage (May 18, 2020)

A380 said:


> But what could possibly cause such behaviour ？  it’s baffling.


They're probably employed for their bubbly personality and unbounded enthusiasm


----------



## ruffneck23 (May 18, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (May 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 18, 2020)




----------



## May Kasahara (May 18, 2020)

ska invita said:


> View attachment 213189



...but please aim your ambulance towards my baby when they contract measles.


----------



## MrSki (May 18, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 18, 2020)




----------



## BCBlues (May 18, 2020)

MrSki said:


>




I thought she was gonna scream "beam me up" at the end


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 18, 2020)




----------



## JuanTwoThree (May 18, 2020)

Death walks the streets of  Haro, shouting at people with his megaphone if they are too close. Opinion is divided, shall we say?









						Un personaje disfrazado de `la Muerte´ guadaña en mano se pasea por Haro pidiendo a los jarreros que mantengan el distanciamiento social
					






					www.radioharo.com


----------



## Badgers (May 18, 2020)

Shit is getting real


----------



## two sheds (May 18, 2020)

Dear "Neighbour"

I actually asked your dogs and bird whether they minded my children running round and enjoying themselves and they raised no objections at all


----------



## Badgers (May 18, 2020)




----------



## Anju (May 18, 2020)

South Korean football team apologises for using sex dolls to fill stands


----------



## Sir Belchalot (May 18, 2020)

Durdle Door is always rammed in the summer time, it's the busiest part of the Dorset coast.  Quite a shock if you've been walking the coast path from the west where you hardly see anyone else, this paraphrased Bowie lyric comes to mind whenever I'm there:
See the mice in their million hordes from Lulworth Cove to Durdle Door.


----------



## Voley (May 18, 2020)

Relax folks. Lee Scratch Perry is here to save us all.


----------



## Voley (May 18, 2020)

He tweeted the above with the message 'BUT WHAT ABOUT PAPAYA?'

Obviously.


----------



## gosub (May 18, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


Actually its a load of islands, but a couple of main ones, and they must of had some pressure on them to make sure they did the right thing otherwise North and South island could have run off and done completely different things.  Stupid to compare that with the UK


----------



## gosub (May 18, 2020)

Voley said:


> He tweeted the above with the message 'BUT WHAT ABOUT PAPAYA?'
> 
> Obviously.



If that nail he put in that tree WASN'T about Papaya, what was it about


----------



## dessiato (May 18, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



We've seen similar here on the Costas. The selfishness and stupidity of some people is astounding.


----------



## gosub (May 18, 2020)

dessiato said:


> We've seen similar here on the Costas. The selfishness and stupidity of some people is astounding.




Learnt that lesson one really soggy Glastonbury back in the 90's, was a complete mud bath.  We had a marquee in Green futures, that gave us electrics nightmares so we never public opened - but meant when we watched the highlights after Jules Holland was wrong when he said the spot under his gypsy caravan was the largest patch of green on site- our pitch was, but he was right on the underlying - everywhere people could go was fucked.


----------



## William of Walworth (May 18, 2020)

gosub said:


> *Learnt that lesson one really soggy Glastonbury back in the 90's, was a complete mud bath. * We had a marquee in Green futures, that gave us electrics nightmares so we never public opened - but meant when we watched the highlights after Jules Holland was wrong when he said the spot under his gypsy caravan was the largest patch of green on site- our pitch was, but he was right on the underlying - everywhere people could go was fucked.



Either 1997 or 1998 is my guess -- both were complete horror-shows mudwise 
The relief at getting a dry 1999 Glastonbury was overwhelming , after those two!


----------



## T & P (May 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 18, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (May 18, 2020)

Patel blows a massive dogwhistle:


----------



## eatmorecheese (May 18, 2020)

Confessing to meth will save you


----------



## HAL9000 (May 18, 2020)

x


----------



## HAL9000 (May 18, 2020)

Hydroxychloroquine can cause the following:


Skin rashes, especially ones made worse by sunlight 
Nausea or indigestion 
Diarrhoea 
Headaches 
Bleaching of the hair or mild hair loss   
Tinnitus (ringing in the ears) 
Blurred vision Very rarely


----------



## existentialist (May 18, 2020)

HAL9000 said:


> Taking Hydroxychloroquine?
> 
> Cover one eye, then focus on the dot in the centre.
> 
> ...


Given that Trump can't even see the beam in his own eye, I think the chances of his spotting a tiny dot on a grid are pretty low...


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 19, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Patel blows a massive dogwhistle:



So presumably she  can be deported to the moon based on based on what she has to offer not where she is from.


----------



## MrSki (May 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 19, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 19, 2020)




----------



## T & P (May 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 213371


Definitely photoshopped.


----------



## teqniq (May 19, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (May 19, 2020)

The Portuguese President


----------



## MrSki (May 19, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 19, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (May 19, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


They missed out the all important gardening centres so your gardener can get supplies.


----------



## MrSki (May 19, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> They missed out the all important gardening centres so your gardener can get supplies.


Garden centres are popular across the class divide. I am sure there are a lot of peeps who grow their own veg glad to get plug plants.


----------



## Teaboy (May 19, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Garden centres are popular across the class divide. I am sure there are a lot of peeps who grow their own veg glad to get plug plants.



Well duh..  I had noticed that a lot of people have gardens.  It was a joke on a joke thread.


----------



## 2hats (May 19, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



Full, unedited, original interview here post #12,487.


----------



## planetgeli (May 19, 2020)

30 days have...no, wait,









						Jonathan Van-Tam: UK quarantined arrivals from '30th Feb'
					

We've all been finding it hard to keep track of time lately, and Jonathan Van-Tam is apparently no different.




					metro.co.uk


----------



## Mation (May 19, 2020)

2hats said:


> Full, unedited, original interview here post #12,487.


Yes, the unedited version makes it clear that this man is no idiot, but it's still not great. He's fumbling about as he's trying desperately (it seems) not to say what he actually thinks, whilst giving an answer that doesn't demolish his integrity.

I wouldn't fancy it (and, happily, don't have to). But he probably shouldn't have agreed to the interview. There's no way to come out of that usefully or well.


----------



## 2hats (May 19, 2020)

Mation said:


> Yes, the unedited version makes it clear that this man is no idiot, but it's still not great.


Wouldn't be the first scientist, won't be the last, to not be the smoothest, charismatic, televisually adroit PUS communicator.


> whilst giving an answer that doesn't demolish his integrity


Or fishing for words they hope least likely to be misrepresented?


----------



## HAL9000 (May 19, 2020)

Mation said:


> Yes, the unedited version makes it clear that this man is no idiot, but it's still not great. He's fumbling about as he's trying desperately (it seems) not to say what he actually thinks, whilst giving an answer that doesn't demolish his integrity.
> 
> I wouldn't fancy it (and, happily, don't have to). But he probably shouldn't have agreed to the interview. There's no way to come out of that usefully or well.



Should everyone who goes on tv, be very self confident, good at arguing black is white and never admit to not knowing something?

If that's the case, we will only ever get people with certain personality traits.

Uncertainty and unkowns are a factor with covid-19.


----------



## Mation (May 19, 2020)

HAL9000 said:


> Should everyone who goes on tv, be very self confident, good at arguing black is white and never admit to not knowing something?
> 
> If that's the case, we will only ever get people with certain personality traits.
> 
> Uncertainty and unkowns are a factor with covid-19.


No, absolutely not. But what screamed out at me was that he seemed to think and want to say "you're right, we massively fucked up" but was doing his level best to find a way _not_ to deny that, whilst also not destroying his career (understandable) or making himself the focus of massive scrutiny, or a patsy for something that probably wasn't his fault in the main. That's a really hard position to put yourself in. It made him look, probably unfairly, evasive (and of course in the edit designed to do so, like a total fool). I hold my hands up to falling for the first edit. 

I may well be projecting as I often find answering people's questions (in ordinary situations) problematic, as 5 million thoughts compete for dominance over what could or should come out of my mouth.


----------



## pseudonarcissus (May 19, 2020)

Well, this looks rather fun....the Wet'N Wild Covid-19 Field Hospital


----------



## Anju (May 19, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 19, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 19, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 19, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 20, 2020)




----------



## Lorca (May 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 20, 2020)

*Thursdays is clap for the NHS, and now on Fridays...

 *


----------



## Orang Utan (May 20, 2020)

Lorca said:


> View attachment 213619


This is true - someone once took a shit on the shopfloor at the Our Price I worked at - right out in public, in the soul/dance section.
Someone also once flung a tissue-wrapped turd on the counter. And we had to boost a wanker from the Taschen erotica section - didn't want to touch him, so broomed him out, Black Books style


----------



## Aladdin (May 20, 2020)

MrSki said:


>




That's such a creepy looking room.  Reminds me of the set of some horror movie.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 20, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> That's such a creepy looking room.  Reminds me of the set of some horror movie.


----------



## DexterTCN (May 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 20, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (May 20, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (May 20, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 20, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 20, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 213670


Conveniently forgetting to admit that this 'god' must have also created the virus.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 20, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (May 20, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Conveniently forgetting to admit that this 'god' must have also created the virus.



He did it lovingly, though, to test our faith


----------



## existentialist (May 20, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Conveniently forgetting to admit that this 'god' must have also created the virus.


No, Satan does that shit. They've got their theology quite nicely sewn up...


----------



## The39thStep (May 20, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (May 20, 2020)

I liked this,


----------



## chainsawjob (May 21, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (May 21, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I liked this,




This made me smile yesterday


----------



## Calamity1971 (May 21, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> This is true - someone once took a shit on the shopfloor at the Our Price I worked at - right out in public, in the soul/dance section.
> Someone also once flung a tissue-wrapped turd on the counter. And we had to boost a wanker from the Taschen erotica section - didn't want to touch him, so broomed him out, Black Books style


I used to do cleaning audits for matalans in the northeast, people would take the lid off the seats in the changing rooms and take a dump in them.
Someone took a loads of clothes in, pissed on the floor and mopped it up with them. These stores had public toilets!


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 21, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 21, 2020)




----------



## T & P (May 21, 2020)

existentialist said:


> No, Satan does that shit. They've got their theology quite nicely sewn up...


Yeah, I'm not sure I buy that about Satan, given the proven past record of both entities thus far...


----------



## Badgers (May 21, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 21, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 213845


There's no polite response to that.


----------



## Combustible (May 21, 2020)

T & P said:


> Yeah, I'm not sure I buy that about Satan, given the proven past record of both entities thus far...



I assume the 10 for Satan are Job's children, but he also killed his numerous servants as well, albeit nowhere near as many people as God has killed, and anyway God told Satan to do it.


----------



## Combustible (May 21, 2020)




----------



## T & P (May 21, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 21, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 21, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (May 21, 2020)

I miss going to Reading.  Not going to work, obviously, but just Reading. Nice to see this lot are still on their patch on Broad Street, despite everything.  Hope Reading Elvis is OK.


----------



## cyril_smear (May 21, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (May 21, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 213845



different businesses?


----------



## dessiato (May 21, 2020)

Asking for a friend


----------



## May Kasahara (May 21, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I miss going to Reading.



Pandemic starting to bite hard.


----------



## Raheem (May 21, 2020)

T & P said:


> Yeah, I'm not sure I buy that about Satan, given the proven past record of both entities thus far...


Satan wrote the Bible and he made a lot of stuff up.


----------



## two sheds (May 21, 2020)

Raheem said:


> Satan wrote the Bible and he made a lot of stuff up.



I heard Stan.


----------



## MrSki (May 21, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 21, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 21, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (May 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 22, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 22, 2020)

View attachment 213933View attachment 213933


----------



## Fez909 (May 22, 2020)




----------



## MickiQ (May 22, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 22, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 213919


 Donald Trump knows more about medical issues than almost anybody.


----------



## gosub (May 22, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> Donald Trump knows more about medical issues than almost anybody.



Are you trying to put me off ever seeing a doctor?


----------



## cyril_smear (May 22, 2020)

gosub said:


> Are you trying to put me off ever seeing a doctor?



Only go to the doctor if you can't get advice from Trump/Google.


----------



## gosub (May 22, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> Only go to the doctor if you can't get advice from Trump/Google.




 If you are taking medical advice from Mr Trump, it will increase the chances of needing a doctor


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 22, 2020)




----------



## mystic pyjamas (May 22, 2020)

He has said doctors often ask him how he knows so much.


----------



## two sheds (May 22, 2020)

mystic pyjamas said:


> He has said doctors often ask him how he knows so much.



Trump: spouts some unsubstantiated shit 
Doctor: how do you know that???


----------



## MrSki (May 22, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (May 22, 2020)

more english people not knowing/realisng/caring Wales is a different country


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 22, 2020)

ddraig said:


> more english people not knowing/realisng/caring Wales is a different country



Why do you always capitalise Wales and Welsh but leave england and english lower case?  I mean it's blatantly obvious that you're doing it deliberately. Why do you do it?  Is it xenophobia or Anglophobia ?


----------



## ddraig (May 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Why do you always capitalise Wales and Welsh but leave england and english lower case?  I mean it's blatantly obvious that you're doing it deliberately. Why do you do it?  Is it xenophobia or Anglophobia ?


wtf? xenophobia?? 
Why does it bother you?


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 22, 2020)

ddraig said:


> wtf? xenophobia??
> Why does it bother you?


It bothers me because it wouldn't (and shouldn't) be tolerated from anyone else and about any other country.
Why do you do it?


----------



## MrSki (May 22, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (May 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> It bothers me because it wouldn't (and shouldn't) be tolerated from anyone else and about any other country.
> Why do you do it?


bollocks


----------



## two sheds (May 22, 2020)

take this to the Which countries deserve capital letters thread eh lads?


----------



## Clair De Lune (May 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Why do you always capitalise Wales and Welsh but leave england and english lower case?  I mean it's blatantly obvious that you're doing it deliberately. Why do you do it?  Is it xenophobia or Anglophobia ?


I love that you noticed this   I'M GUESSING YOU'RE eNGLISH?


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 22, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> I love that you noticed this   I'M GUESSING YOU'RE eNGLISH?


No, I'm Irish. 
But I'm still allowed to call out blatant xenophobia.


----------



## Clair De Lune (May 22, 2020)

You know you shouldn't have showed your tender Big E underbelly like that Saul Goodman. Not with your reputation.


----------



## ddraig (May 22, 2020)

.


----------



## ddraig (May 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> No, I'm Irish.
> But I'm still allowed to call out blatant xenophobia.


Should be on our side then 
*last off topic post!


----------



## Clair De Lune (May 22, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> No, I'm Irish.
> But I'm still allowed to call out blatant xenophobia.


I'm so biased it's hard to see beyond that. Explain to me how  a wincy bit of disrespect of capitalisation harms anyone? you're not english


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 22, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> I'm so biased it's hard to see beyond that. Explain to me how  a wincy bit of disrespect of capitalisation harms anyone? you're not english


I think it's something to do with being born in Ireland to Irish parents


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 22, 2020)

I was  going to make  a island  of Ireland joke  but   can't be arsed to work out the  details.


----------



## Clair De Lune (May 23, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I think it's something to do with being born in Ireland to Irish parents


Hmm peculiar indeed


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 23, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> Hmm peculiar indeed


I think the Manchester accent came from Manchester. I spent almost 30 of my formative years there


----------



## two sheds (May 23, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> I think the Manchester accent came from Manchester. I spent almost 30 of my formative years there



ahhh that's why you're so sensitive about it then


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 23, 2020)

two sheds said:


> ahhh that's why you're so sensitive about it then


No.


----------



## two sheds (May 23, 2020)

there's another reason?


----------



## Epona (May 23, 2020)

Can we please resume with the apocolyptic humour?  This thread is all that prevents some of us from running down the street screaming, a return to normal service at your earliest convenience would be appreciated.  Many thanks, love you all


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 23, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (May 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 23, 2020)




----------



## HAL9000 (May 23, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 23, 2020)




----------



## Clair De Lune (May 23, 2020)

Epona said:


> Can we please resume with the apocolyptic humour?  This thread is all that prevents some of us from running down the street screaming, a return to normal service at your earliest convenience would be appreciated.  Many thanks, love you all


Yes. My apologies from drunk me.


----------



## The39thStep (May 23, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 23, 2020)

This came up on my FB. Whether it's real or not I don't know. The message, I think, is spot on.


----------



## Cadmus (May 23, 2020)

dessiato said:


> This came up on my FB. Whether it's real or not I don't know. The message, I think, is spot on.
> 
> View attachment 214149



Hippocrates agrees.


----------



## Artaxerxes (May 23, 2020)

dessiato said:


> This came up on my FB. Whether it's real or not I don't know. The message, I think, is spot on.
> 
> View attachment 214149



All these people clapping and oathing everywhere


----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)

“We were simply keen to visit Durham, with its famous castle and cathedral which has a 66m spire”


----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)

We were just looking after our mum...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


> “We were simply keen to visit Durham, with its famous castle and cathedral which has a 66m spire”


Pedant alert - according to wikipedia it doesn't have spires, but did until 1658.









						Durham Cathedral - Wikipedia
					






					en.wikipedia.org
				




Glorious building nonetheless though.


----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)




----------



## Ranbay (May 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)

YouGov polling


----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)




----------



## Shechemite (May 23, 2020)

#cummingsout


----------



## Sprocket. (May 23, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Pedant alert - according to wikipedia it doesn't have spires, but did until 1658.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



You are Simon Groom and I claim my five pounds!


----------



## wayward bob (May 23, 2020)

i read that twice as "his job as the prime minister", and i didn't think we were meant to know that.


----------



## A380 (May 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)

Dominic Cummings ignored lockdown rules for second time to visit parents
					

EXCLUSIVE Calls are growing for Boris Johnson's top aide to be sacked after breaching lockdown rules intended to keep the country safe - but so far the Government has tried to defend him



					www.mirror.co.uk
				






> Dominic Cummings ignored coronavirus lockdown rules for a second time to visit his parents more than 250 miles away, the Sunday Mirror can reveal.
> 
> Boris Johnson’s top aide was spotted with his wife in Houghall Woods near the family’s Durham home two weeks after the first sighting.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Dominic Cummings ignored lockdown rules for second time to visit parents
> 
> 
> EXCLUSIVE Calls are growing for Boris Johnson's top aide to be sacked after breaching lockdown rules intended to keep the country safe - but so far the Government has tried to defend him
> ...





> Mr Johnson was under growing pressure from Opposition leaders to sack his top aide - *while Tory MPs were grumbling about the double standards.*



He's fucked.


----------



## Badgers (May 23, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> He's fucked.


----------



## rubbershoes (May 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




Anyone stopped by the police could maximise their chance of being let off by giving their name as Dominic Cummings


----------



## two sheds (May 23, 2020)

rubbershoes said:


> Anyone stopped by the police could maximise their chance of being let off by giving their name as Dominic Cummings



Here's hoping for a slew of court cases featuring "When stopped, the defendant gave his name as Dominic Cummings and said he was on his way to Durham to see his mum and dad."


----------



## MrSki (May 23, 2020)




----------



## editor (May 23, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (May 24, 2020)

Here's the Dominic Cummings cutout mask!

Just print it off cutout the eyes and wear it to go anywhere you want at any time during the lockdown.

Pinched from Kirk Whitehouse.


----------



## MrSki (May 24, 2020)




----------



## fucthest8 (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

Turns out it was the police, press and witnesses who were all lying after all


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 24, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 24, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 24, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 24, 2020)




----------



## DaveCinzano (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 213036


Possibly the very best thing I have ever seen, bar none


----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 24, 2020)

Nicked from the Cummings thread...


----------



## A380 (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

Covid-19 cases timeline in Durham


----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

> Barton added: “It feels like feudal times. We make the rules and it is for you, the great unwashed, to follow them.”







__





						Defence of Dominic Cummings is shameful, says ex-Durham police chief | Dominic Cummings | The Guardian
					

Mike Barton brands UK government ‘self-privileged hypocrites’ who have damaged public trust




					amp.theguardian.com


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Nicked from the Cummings thread...



 Cain form robocop has let his sen go a bit.


----------



## pesh (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (May 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 24, 2020)

That's truly beautiful.


----------



## spitfire (May 24, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> That's truly beautiful.



Isn't it!

The way he turns into it to make sure he gets as much coverage as possible is art.


----------



## two sheds (May 24, 2020)

"Only in Cornwall "


----------



## MrSki (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

14,000 Brits Could Now Appeal Lockdown Fines Thanks to Dominic Cummings – Byline Times
					

Gareth Roberts explores the unexpected legal consequences of the Government’s defence of the Prime Minister’s chief advisor




					bylinetimes.com


----------



## Numbers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

Is there more to come...


----------



## Pickman's model (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Is there more to come...



it's fair to say that boris johnson has no legal qualifications and his only obvious expertise in this matter is his unparalleled knowledge in the field of family law


----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



Tweet deleted but here it is...


----------



## Cerv (May 24, 2020)

deleted already. 
sadly whoever did it will be sacked when they actually deserve a knighthood


----------



## Pickman's model (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


> 14,000 Brits Could Now Appeal Lockdown Fines Thanks to Dominic Cummings – Byline Times
> 
> 
> Gareth Roberts explores the unexpected legal consequences of the Government’s defence of the Prime Minister’s chief advisor
> ...


not too impressed with that site.

in another article (Ruling from the Shadows: Why Dominic Cummings Poses a Threat to the Country – Byline Times) iain overton says

i imagine i'm a far more typical generation xer, being as i earn not too far off the national average wage and was born in the same year as dc. but i don't think i'm a gloomy, curmudgeonly ghost. and even if i was i think that by bringing age into it they devalue their analysis. entitled wanker is entitled wanker, of whatever age they are.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 24, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (May 24, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> not too impressed with that site.
> 
> in another article (Ruling from the Shadows: Why Dominic Cummings Poses a Threat to the Country – Byline Times) iain overton says
> View attachment 214435
> i don't think i'm a gloomy, curmudgeonly ghost.



We'll be the judge of that shall we?


----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

Outside Cummings house now


----------



## Pickman's model (May 24, 2020)

two sheds said:


> We'll be the judge of that shall we?


how auld are you again?


----------



## two sheds (May 24, 2020)

Born _just before_ 1971


----------



## Numbers (May 24, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Born _just before_ 1971


N00b.


----------



## Sprocket. (May 24, 2020)

There it is.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Tweet deleted but here it is...
> 
> View attachment 214440


Yeah, if that's true someone is going to get sacked.  Guess that account is managed by Cabinet Office, probably by a comms team so easy to identify who posted that.  If true it's wonderful though.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 24, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Yeah, if that's true someone is going to get sacked.  Guess that account is managed by Cabinet Office, probably by a comms team so easy to identify who posted that.  If true it's wonderful though.



It does seem true...









						WATCH: Civil service Twitter account slams Boris Johnson’s defence of D...
					

Shortly after Boris Johnson's press conference at Downing Street, where he defended his chief adviser Dominic Cummings, the official UK...




					www.theneweuropean.co.uk
				






> The official civil service Twitter account wrote after: “Arrogant and offensive.
> 
> “Can you imagine having to work with these truth twisters?”
> 
> ...



It's funny as fuck, isn't it.


----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)

Cold War Steve


----------



## Sprocket. (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Cold War Steve
> 
> View attachment 214458



Carsick Steve!


----------



## dessiato (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Cold War Steve
> 
> View attachment 214458



It’s a fuckin belter!  Who’s the bloke in between Branson & Shipman?


----------



## Cerv (May 24, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> It’s a fuckin belter!  Who’s the bloke in between Branson & Shipman?


isn't that Mary Wakefield? Cummings' wife. (not a bloke)


----------



## two sheds (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




That reaction from people is genuinely heartwarming ❤ I hope it's what he's got to look forward to for the foreseeable.


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




misleading; nobody shouted wanky little shit


----------



## two sheds (May 24, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> misleading; nobody shouted wanky little shit



Yes, the bloke tweeting did


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




I liked that but then remembered I'm not too keen on naming and shaming peoples locations.


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> It’s a fuckin belter!  Who’s the bloke in between Branson & Shipman?


and whats phil mitchell got to do with it


----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Yes, the bloke tweeting did



am i going deaf... i'll go for another look/listen


----------



## Mr.Bishie (May 24, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> and whats phil mitchell got to do with it



You have no idea have you


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> You have no idea have you



it gives you a giggle though


----------



## Mr.Bishie (May 24, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> it gives you a giggle though



Do one, ya miserable fuckin git


----------



## Badgers (May 24, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (May 24, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> am i going deaf... i'll go for another look/listen



I asked him, he told me he did


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

two sheds said:


> I asked him, he told me he did



I wanted to hear him being called a wanky little shit, it would have given me some slight sense of gratification.


----------



## two sheds (May 24, 2020)

He'd have put it in quotation marks in that case.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (May 24, 2020)

Cerv said:


> isn't that Mary Wakefield? Cummings' wife. (not a bloke)



Ah thanks! My bad


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> You have no idea have you



I don't watch much television, so please explain?


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 214492


----------



## Mr.Bishie (May 24, 2020)

Google Cold War Steve (Christopher Spencer) ya lazy git.


----------



## DaveCinzano (May 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


>


----------



## DaveCinzano (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (May 24, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


>



its already being posted


----------



## Orang Utan (May 24, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> its already being posted


Forgive me for taking nearly a whole hour to post it. Will try harder next time.


----------



## cyril_smear (May 24, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Forgive me for taking nearly a whole hour to post it. Will try harder next time.


 just an hour?


----------



## quiet guy (May 24, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (May 24, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Forgive me for taking nearly a whole hour to post it. Will try harder next time.



Ignore them, they’re in cunty mode.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 24, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> just an hour?


time is right there, sausage


----------



## spring-peeper (May 24, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> Ignore them, they’re in cunty mode.



yip!!!


----------



## gosub (May 25, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 214492


----------



## MrSki (May 25, 2020)




----------



## tony.c (May 25, 2020)




----------



## tony.c (May 25, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 25, 2020)




----------



## hegley (May 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 25, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (May 25, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 25, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 25, 2020)




----------



## Marty1 (May 25, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (May 25, 2020)

oh fuck off and drink some bleach


----------



## Ax^ (May 25, 2020)

Marty1 said:


>


----------



## Ax^ (May 25, 2020)

so we have 4 posters on a 24 hour ban

and we got this one back


thats a pretty shitty trade off


----------



## ska invita (May 25, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> and whats phil mitchell got to do with it


whats phil mitchell but a second hand emotion?


----------



## cyril_smear (May 25, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> oh fuck off and drink some bleach



you old charmer you


----------



## editor (May 25, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> oh fuck off and drink some bleach


<wrong person>


----------



## ska invita (May 25, 2020)

editor said:


> Off this thread you go with a warning buzzing in your ear. That is a video for fucking morons.



it was a perfectly appropriate response i thought


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 25, 2020)

ska invita said:


> it was a perfectly appropriate response i thought



editor quoted the wrong post, it's Marty1 that got the warning, and I assume thread ban, as he collects them.


----------



## krtek a houby (May 25, 2020)

Marty1 said:


>




I was right. You do fuck goats.


----------



## editor (May 25, 2020)

ska invita said:


> it was a perfectly appropriate response i thought


Sorry, that comment was actually meant for Marty1 - who is the one warned and thread banned-  but now you mention it, OU should get a warning too because it's really not on to tell people to drink bleach.

Let's now screw this thread over, so please take any further comments to the feedback forum. Thanks.


----------



## krtek a houby (May 25, 2020)

editor said:


> That comment was actually meant for Marty1, but now you mention it, OU should get a warning too because it's not on to tell people to drink bleach.



Aye, it's not on. But given the far right Martyr1 shitting over numerous threads, can we plead mitigating circumstances?


----------



## editor (May 25, 2020)

Marty1 said:


> -shit video -


Banned from thread and warning given.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 25, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Aye, it's not on. But given the far right Martyr1 shitting over numerous threads, can we plead mitigating circumstances?



I think OU will wear it as a badge of honour.


----------



## quiet guy (May 25, 2020)

Trip Advisor reviews of Barnard Castle


----------



## Orang Utan (May 25, 2020)

editor said:


> Sorry, that comment was actually meant for Marty1 - who is the one warned and thread banned-  but now you mention it, OU should get a warning too because it's really not on to tell people to drink bleach.
> 
> Let's now screw this thread over, so please take any further comments to the feedback forum. Thanks.


but the president said it would be ok and marty's a big fan


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 25, 2020)

Donald Trump furious as 100,000 dead Americans distract from the sweet birdie he got at the 14th hole
					

The pugnacious president has once again taken to Twitter so as to lambaste the press for making a big fuss about COVID-19 killing 100,000 Americans and not even mentioning his amazing skill with a wedge that allowed him to shoot a personal best at his Virginia golf course.




					newsthump.com


----------



## mwgdrwg (May 25, 2020)




----------



## gosub (May 25, 2020)

editor said:


> Sorry, that comment was actually meant for Marty1 - who is the one warned and thread banned-  but now you mention it, OU should get a warning too because* it's really not on to tell people to drink bleach.*
> 
> Let's now screw this thread over, so please take any further comments to the feedback forum. Thanks.



Yet Donald Trump seems to have gotten away with it


----------



## two sheds (May 25, 2020)

He'd have been banned from the thread too if he'd suggested it here.


----------



## Epona (May 25, 2020)

From Barnard Castle Trip Advisor reviews:


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 25, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 25, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 25, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 25, 2020)




----------



## AverageJoe (May 25, 2020)




----------



## mwgdrwg (May 25, 2020)




----------



## elbows (May 25, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 25, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 25, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 25, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 25, 2020)




----------



## krink (May 25, 2020)

Can i just point out it's pronounced Bar-nud not Bar-nard. 
you ignorant Loon-din twats.


----------



## Epona (May 25, 2020)

krink said:


> Can i just point out it's pronounced Bar-nud not Bar-nard.
> you ignorant Loon-din twats.



Bar-nud or Baa-nud is how most ordinary Londoners would naturally pronounce it, we don't really go in for pronouncing many "r"s here.  I think you mean Eton twats.*

*(which btw we naturally pronounce as "E'un twa's"


----------



## krink (May 25, 2020)

Epona said:


> Bar-nud or Baa-nud is how most ordinary Londoners would naturally pronounce it, we don't really go in for pronouncing many "r"s here.  I think you mean Eton twats.*
> 
> *(which btw we naturally pronounce as "E'un twa's"



fair dos my cheery cockerney chum!


----------



## MrSki (May 25, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (May 26, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (May 26, 2020)

Cold War Steve at it again...





Here.


----------



## dessiato (May 26, 2020)

Does anyone know a good psychic? There's 55000 ghosts might like channelling in his direction.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 26, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (May 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 26, 2020)

Telegraph today.


----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## belboid (May 26, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## T & P (May 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 26, 2020)




----------



## eatmorecheese (May 26, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 26, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (May 26, 2020)

Try again...


----------



## A380 (May 26, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (May 26, 2020)

Dp


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 26, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Dp


Two action men?  

All those phthalates.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 26, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 26, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Two action men?


Come separately from the bernard castle play set


----------



## The39thStep (May 26, 2020)

So good I'll post it on two threads


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 26, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


>


A380 - chemical leak plastic dildo man.


----------



## DaveCinzano (May 27, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> A380 - chemical leak plastic dildo man.


EXTRICATE!


----------



## gosub (May 27, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (May 27, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (May 27, 2020)

Police break up illegal lockdown birthday party at Tory MP's house
					

EXCLUSIVE: There were balloons and banners outside the house of Rob Roberts, MP for Delyn in North Wales, marking a 40th birthday on Monday after he commented on the Dominic Cummings' row



					www.mirror.co.uk


----------



## gentlegreen (May 27, 2020)

Have we had this one yet ?


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 27, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (May 27, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 214944



An unhappy medium.


----------



## kabbes (May 27, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Have we had this one yet ?



Interesting fact: people always misuse that song.  Piaf is actually singing about the good, bad and ugly things that have been done to her by past lovers and saying she doesn’t regret them because they made her who she is today.  It’s “all the same” to her because she’s going to start again anyway with a new love. It’s not at all a song defiantly proclaiming a lack of regret for her own bad actions.

Anyway, knowing that makes the song much more beautiful to me.


----------



## xes (May 27, 2020)




----------



## xes (May 27, 2020)




----------



## xes (May 27, 2020)




----------



## xes (May 27, 2020)




----------



## xes (May 27, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 27, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 27, 2020)




----------



## lefteri (May 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 27, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


>



The Mirror has picked up on this.



> According to Bridport News, Highways England was alerted to the errant signage this morning - but had no idea who put it there, or indeed who owned the land it was on.
> 
> They said the sign "is not their asset, nor is it located on the A35".



Yay!   



> A spokesman for Dorset Council said: "We are using temporary road signs at the request of the Department for Transport to help remind people of their responsibilities during the Covid-19 pandemic.
> 
> 
> "It seems that a local anonymous prankster has added their opinion to one of our signs in west Dorset. The additional homemade sign is unauthorised so it will be removed."



Boo!  









						Yes, this roadsign declaring the rules don't apply to Dominic Cummings is real
					

The sign appeared underneath an official sign urging people to follow government guidance




					www.mirror.co.uk


----------



## Epona (May 27, 2020)

Not a joke (profits will be used to provide free hand sanitiser)


----------



## Roadkill (May 27, 2020)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 28, 2020)

Man who lives in a compound with a basement full of guns says he won't live in fear
					

Local survivalist and doomsday prepper Simon-Bob Williams refuses to live his life in fear, it has emerged.




					newsthump.com


----------



## dessiato (May 28, 2020)

Epona said:


> Not a joke (profits will be used to provide free hand sanitiser)
> 
> View attachment 215031


If that’s real I want some.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 28, 2020)

dessiato said:


> If that’s real I want some.



It's real - BrewDog


----------



## dessiato (May 28, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> It's real - BrewDog


I need to get some. Now, who do I know in the U.K. who I trust will not drink it and will keep it till I get there?


----------



## Badgers (May 28, 2020)

Salford


----------



## MrSki (May 28, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 28, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (May 28, 2020)

Kentish Town, twitter informs me...



Good work.


----------



## dessiato (May 28, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 28, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (May 28, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (May 28, 2020)

https://m.facebook.com/groups/1650795475149368?view=permalink&id=2739486906280214


----------



## two sheds (May 28, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> https://m.facebook.com/groups/1650795475149368?view=permalink&id=2739486906280214



that one doesn't work either  

if there's a miracle I want to know about it


----------



## quiet guy (May 28, 2020)

Miracle - take2


----------



## two sheds (May 28, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Miracle - take2



Nope, god's lost his powers


----------



## quiet guy (May 28, 2020)

That's wierd as it opens for me with an option to either open in Facey or Chrome.


----------



## belboid (May 28, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Miracle - take2


it's a closed group, specific posts can only be seen by members


----------



## two sheds (May 28, 2020)

oops sorry as you were  it opens ok in chromium.

Eta: yes as you were before it was as you were. It does open but not the post only the front page of the group.


----------



## quiet guy (May 28, 2020)

belboid said:


> it's a closed group, specific posts can only be seen by members


Yes that will be the reason, plus my tablet isn't the easiest to try to save items to post elsewhere.


----------



## two sheds (May 28, 2020)

can you c&p the relevant text? Or doe the relevance of you being on table come in here?


----------



## quiet guy (May 28, 2020)

It's the pictures that are causing the issue.


----------



## Badgers (May 28, 2020)

So people really need to eat out that badly? 

(Paris)


----------



## Badgers (May 28, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 28, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 28, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (May 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 29, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (May 29, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (May 29, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (May 29, 2020)

I made this lol


----------



## gosub (May 29, 2020)




----------



## T & P (May 29, 2020)

I see that someone has just outCumminged Dominic Cummings...  
No link yet so I've had to screenshot the screen...


----------



## cyril_smear (May 29, 2020)

To make the stadiums seem less empty at the rugby they have started adding cardboard cut outs to the seats... somebody has a sense of hu mour. And it's not photo shopped.


----------



## DexterTCN (May 29, 2020)




----------



## cyril_smear (May 29, 2020)

Dom


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 29, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> Dom
> 
> View attachment 215248


He looks like a mutant hamster.


----------



## Cerv (May 29, 2020)

cyril_smear said:


> Dom
> 
> View attachment 215248


haha. amazing


----------



## dessiato (May 29, 2020)




----------



## Raheem (May 29, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 215300


Too many thumbs up to be realistic.


----------



## Fez909 (May 30, 2020)




----------



## A380 (May 30, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



What’s happened to the Daily Star?


----------



## Raheem (May 30, 2020)

A380 said:


> What’s happened to the Daily Star?


Belongs to Reach (Mirror Group) now.


----------



## dessiato (May 30, 2020)




----------



## InfoBurner (May 30, 2020)




----------



## T & P (May 30, 2020)

Daily Star is still vile shite of course, but it holding an opinion critical of a right wing Tory government is refreshing, and will have made some of their readership choke on their bacon butty.


----------



## T & P (May 30, 2020)

On the subject of newspaper front pages, a mate of mine works for Metro. She’s often told me that the business model of that paper has always been, despite who owns it, to be a politically neutral newspaper aiming at commuters of any political denomination who simply want a light read on the Tube.

It is therefore interesting that earlier this week they were about the strongest critic of Cummings, or as strong as any other paper anyway. Their front page on Tuesday was arguably the most incisive of all the papers


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 30, 2020)

T & P said:


> Metro.....





T & P said:


> ... politically neutral newspaper...



I've always got the impression it's only "politically neutral" so long as you regard the establishment / status quo as "non political" and it's only "political" if anyone - especially trade unions - try in any way to challenge it, with a strong chunk of celeb bollocks to try and take peoples' mind off it all.

Which in some ways is more pernicious than papers that blatantly say "vote tory"


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 30, 2020)

T & P said:


> Daily Star is still vile shite of course, but it holding an opinion critical of a right wing Tory government is refreshing, and *will have made some of their readership choke on their bacon butty.*



Not sure about, even Tory voters are pissed off Cummings, did you see that poll chart from the Mail posted on here a few days ago?

80% overall thought he had broken the rules, 73% of Tories said the same, the rest were mainly 'don't know/don't care', very few supporting him.

And, remember the Mail went in hard on Monday, with their first 10 pages attacking him!


----------



## T & P (May 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Not sure about, even Tory voters are pissed off Cummings, did you see that poll chart from the Mail posted on here a few days ago?
> 
> 80% overall thought he had broken the rules, 73% of Tories said the same, the rest were mainly 'don't know/don't care', very few supporting him.
> 
> And, remember the Mail went in hard on Monday, with their first 10 pages attacking him!


Yes that’s certainly true, the Mail does sometimes break rank with the party line if they have a problem with something or someone. Though often I feel is less to do with principles, and more with the editor disliking a given individual for whatever reason.

The Sun and in particular the Telegraph however wouldn’t say a bad word about Boris or anyone in his circle if they were filmed throwing kittens into a deep fryer. The Telegraph  has reached levels of arse kissing that makes the North Korean state television seen disloyal to the Great Leader by comparison.


----------



## Aladdin (May 30, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 215117
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Ha..


----------



## MrSki (May 30, 2020)




----------



## Ranbay (May 30, 2020)




----------



## keybored (May 31, 2020)




----------



## gosub (May 31, 2020)

keybored said:


> View attachment 215449
> 
> View attachment 215450
> 
> ...



The problem with that  is doing that today when SpaceX lost a rocket yesterday (even though it was a different type) took balls.


----------



## Lorca (May 31, 2020)

Just been cycling, saw this in a nearby street. Sad isn't it


----------



## Badgers (May 31, 2020)

Lorca said:


> Just been cycling, saw this in a nearby street. Sad isn't it
> View attachment 215476


Where is that?

Put the windows through


----------



## Lorca (May 31, 2020)

it's semi-rural worcestershire, the quintessential small town england. I find it more sad than anything though tbh, i strongly suspect engaging with the author would be a waste of time and energy!


----------



## Badgers (May 31, 2020)

Lorca said:


> it's semi-rural worcestershire, the quintessential small town england. I find it more sad than anything though tbh, i strongly suspect engaging with the author would be a waste of time and energy!


Put the windows through instead of engaging


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 31, 2020)

Lorca said:


> Just been cycling, saw this in a nearby street. Sad isn't it
> View attachment 215476


That's fucking batshit crazy - jesus, how dumb are some people.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 31, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Put the windows through instead of engaging


Paint a red cross on the front door to warn others.


----------



## keybored (May 31, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Paint a red cross on the front door to warn others.


I feel that might be a bit superfluous.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 31, 2020)

Hollywood celebrities already working on terrible cover of 'Killing In The Name'
					

Gal Gadot and her celebrity friends are working on a follow-up to their immensely popular cover of ‘Imagine’, it has emerged.




					newsthump.com


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 31, 2020)

Lorca said:


> i strongly suspect engaging with the author would be a waste of time and energy!


Whatever gives you that impression?


----------



## ruffneck23 (May 31, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (May 31, 2020)

The Seven Dwarfs have been told that from Monday, they can meet as a group of six.

One of them isn’t Happy.


----------



## Saul Goodman (May 31, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> The Seven Dwarfs have been told that from Monday, they can meet as a group of six.
> 
> One of them isn’t Happy.


Six of them aren't Happy.


----------



## gentlegreen (May 31, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Six of them aren't Happy.


Oops


----------



## Orang Utan (May 31, 2020)

Surely Grumpy is the odd one out. Or even Sneezy. He should stay at home


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 31, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Six of them aren't Happy.



That's because one is Sneezy.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 31, 2020)

Anyway, looks like the S-Club 7 reunion’s not happening now


----------



## belboid (May 31, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Anyway, looks like the S-Club 7 reunion’s not happening now


Blake’s Seven’s is still on tho


----------



## Raheem (May 31, 2020)

belboid said:


> Blake’s Seven is still on tho


They're a single household.


----------



## ska invita (May 31, 2020)

belboid said:


> Blake’s Seven’s is still on tho


how come?


----------



## belboid (May 31, 2020)

ska invita said:


> how come?


I’m pretty sure neither Zen nor Oric would count.


----------



## A380 (May 31, 2020)

Magnificent Seven fucked too.

And as for 12 Angry Men, bloody livid.


----------



## A380 (May 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 1, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 1, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Paint a red cross on the front door to warn others.


Then put the windows through!


----------



## gosub (Jun 1, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> Six of them aren't Happy.


But only one is grumpy, greatest good for the the greatest number.   Personally I'd have told Sneezy to stay home


----------



## T & P (Jun 1, 2020)

Ranbay said:


> View attachment 215437



South Coast infection re-spike in 3... 2... 1...


----------



## MrSki (Jun 1, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Jun 1, 2020)

gosub said:


> But only one is grumpy, greatest good for the the greatest number.   Personally I'd have told Sneezy to stay home


with Doc to look after him


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jun 1, 2020)

gosub said:


> But only one is grumpy, greatest good for the the greatest number.   Personally I'd have told Sneezy to stay home


Why didn't sleepy just have a lie in.


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 1, 2020)

Excitement is rife through parts of Yorkshire.
''It's like putting oxygen into back the area''









						Coronavirus: Pigeon racing first sport to return after lockdown
					

More than 4,400 birds race 90 miles from Kettering to Barnsley as lockdown restrictions ease.



					www.bbc.com


----------



## MrSki (Jun 1, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 1, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> Excitement is rife through parts of Yorkshire.
> ''It's like putting oxygen into back the area''
> 
> 
> ...


Is whippet racing and riding bathtubs down hills racing been allowed to restart?


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 1, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Is whippet racing and riding bathtubs down hills racing been allowed to restart?


Not until the latest batch of safety flat caps arrives.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 1, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Jun 1, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Is whippet racing and riding bathtubs down hills racing been allowed to restart?



Yes . Along with selling houses for non-comedic amounts of money...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 1, 2020)




----------



## danski (Jun 1, 2020)

Nicked from b3ta.com


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 1, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Jun 1, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Jun 2, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 2, 2020)

Aerial photo of the queue outside an IKEA


----------



## High Voltage (Jun 2, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Aerial photo of the queue outside an IKEA
> 
> View attachment 215803



To get OUT or to get IN??


----------



## Badgers (Jun 2, 2020)

High Voltage said:


> To get OUT or to get IN??


Sadly the wrong answer


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 2, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Jun 2, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 215809


Oh dear Bud Light. Thought she'd be more a Milk Stout or tot of whiskey.


----------



## quiet guy (Jun 2, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Aerial photo of the queue outside an IKEA
> 
> View attachment 215803


The need for meatballs is strong.


----------



## quiet guy (Jun 2, 2020)

Oh God the summer is truly buggered now


----------



## two sheds (Jun 2, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Oh dear Bud Light. Thought she'd be more a Milk Stout or tot of whiskey.



Would have been thinking more of a bottle of Corona myself.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 3, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Jun 3, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 215809


Fancy living to 103, surviving Coronavirus, and having to drink that shit.


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 3, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Oh dear Bud Light. Thought she'd be more a Milk Stout or tot of whiskey.


Definitely Mackesons or Jubilee Milk Stout.


----------



## tony.c (Jun 3, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> Definitely Mackesons or Jubilee Milk Stout.


Or Ena


----------



## JuanTwoThree (Jun 3, 2020)




----------



## chalkhorse (Jun 3, 2020)

Have we had this one yet?









						Couples should be wearing face masks during sex, expert says
					

After the UK government announced that having sex with someone you don’t live with is illegal, there’s been another blow to those who are feeling frisky in the summer heat.




					www.standard.co.uk


----------



## beesonthewhatnow (Jun 3, 2020)

chalkhorse said:


> Have we had this one yet?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


----------



## gentlegreen (Jun 3, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 3, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Jun 3, 2020)

Faceache playing up


----------



## quiet guy (Jun 3, 2020)

.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jun 3, 2020)

quiet guy said:


>



Third time lucky?


----------



## Badgers (Jun 3, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Faceache playing up


Delete in then


----------



## MrSki (Jun 4, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 4, 2020)




----------



## Ranbay (Jun 4, 2020)

We are the champions of the EU fuck yeah!!


----------



## Badgers (Jun 4, 2020)

Ranbay said:


> We are the champions of the EU fuck yeah!!


Taking back control


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 4, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Jun 4, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> View attachment 216041


Suits me (sir). I definitely want to stay at least 20 metres away from anyone who believes that


----------



## ska invita (Jun 4, 2020)

made me laugh


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jun 5, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Jun 5, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Jun 6, 2020)




----------



## Johnny Doe (Jun 6, 2020)

Voley said:


> View attachment 212590


Boris is already using this as his 'plan', isn't he? 

If you want my future, forget my past
If you wanna get with me, better make it fast
Now don't go wasting my precious time
Get your act together we could be just fine


----------



## platinumsage (Jun 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 6, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 6, 2020)




----------



## Signal 11 (Jun 6, 2020)

platinumsage said:


> View attachment 216371


 pixels.


----------



## zora (Jun 6, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 6, 2020)




----------



## Saul Goodman (Jun 6, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 216439





> Consider sexual arousal techniques that don't involve physical contact - like talking.


So _that's_ what oral sex is...


----------



## Badgers (Jun 6, 2020)

Saul Goodman said:


> So _that's_ what oral sex is...


You remember those days too?


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 6, 2020)

Alan Partridge would approve


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jun 7, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Jun 7, 2020)

'Open goal' caption opportunity:


----------



## Signal 11 (Jun 7, 2020)

brogdale said:


> 'Open goal' caption opportunity:


----------



## existentialist (Jun 7, 2020)

brogdale said:


> 'Open goal' caption opportunity:
> 
> View attachment 216514


"Right, you little prick..."


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jun 7, 2020)

. wrong thread


----------



## dessiato (Jun 7, 2020)




----------



## William of Walworth (Jun 7, 2020)

ska invita said:


> made me laugh
> 
> 
> 
> ...



In the printed version of The Guardian last week (or whenever it was printed), the word 'Servants' was blanked out for some stupid reason   

(ETA : still there online though .... )


----------



## ddraig (Jun 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 8, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Jun 8, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Jun 8, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> View attachment 216626


TBF, that could be Matt Hancock explaining _anything_.


----------



## T & P (Jun 8, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 216622


No matter how good a seal he thinks he has around that thing, a wasp will get in there somehow...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 8, 2020)

T & P said:


> No matter how good a seal he thinks he has around that thing, a wasp will get in there somehow...


Waspophobes should be forced to wear those - filled with plants that wasps absolutely love to pollinate with holes drilled so the lovely wasps can get in.  They'd be rightly trapped in a cloud of angry wasps.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 8, 2020)

Wut, no one likes wasps


----------



## T & P (Jun 8, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Waspophobes should be forced to wear those - filled with plants that wasps absolutely love to pollinate with holes drilled so the lovely wasps can get in.  They'd be rightly trapped in a cloud of angry wasps.


If only wasps would stick to pollinating flowers, or even pollinate flowers for a little bit more than 5% of their time, instead of devoting 95% of their day to try to eat humans' food, drink humans' beer, and constantly fly close to humans' faces and sting them without provocation them even though there is absolutely nothing edible at all on or around people's heads...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 8, 2020)

T & P said:


> If only wasps would stick to pollinating flowers, or even pollinate flowers for a little bit more than 5% of their time, instead of devoting 95% of their day to try to eat humans' food, drink humans' beer, and constantly fly close to humans' faces and sting them without provocation them even though there is absolutely nothing edible at all on or around people's heads...


I've had wasps walking on my face, having a little explore.  They're very sweet but their antennae do tickle a bit when the stick them up your nose.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 8, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Wut, no one likes wasps



Except farmerbarleymow, the bloody weirdo.


----------



## Clair De Lune (Jun 8, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I've had wasps walking on my face, having a little explore.  They're very sweet but their antennae do tickle a bit when the stick them up your nose.


There's a few different ways to react to wasps. I try to stay calm and gently and quietly move away. But there's no way in hell I'd let one stroll about my face as I once watched one land on my mates face ...he was told just be calm, it won't hurt you. .and then it crawled up his nose


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 8, 2020)

I got stung in the eye by a wasp when I was a kid, so I hate the motherfucking wingystingys


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jun 8, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> I got stung in the eye by a wasp when I was a kid, so I hate the motherfucking wingystingys



When I was a kid I stood on one that had chosen to die on the stairs and managed to get bad blood poisoning off it so I am fucking skittish as hell around the demonic little fucks.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 8, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> When I was a kid I stood on one that had chosen to die on the stairs and managed to get bad blood poisoning off it so I am fucking skittish as hell around the demonic little fucks.


I also got an infected sting in my crotch. Was a beecunt that time. Went a bit mad apparently


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 8, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> There's a few different ways to react to wasps. I try to stay calm and gently and quietly move away. But there's no way in hell I'd let one stroll about my face as I once watched one land on my mates face ...he was told just be calm, it won't hurt you. .and then it crawled up his nose


Being calm is the key - I think Mr Waspy was just a bit weary and felt like a rest, so landed on my face.  I just let it do it's thing, and eventually it flew off.


----------



## Roadkill (Jun 8, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 216571



Many a true word spoken in jest, and all that...


----------



## Roadkill (Jun 8, 2020)

T & P said:


> If only wasps would stick to pollinating flowers, or even pollinate flowers for a little bit more than 5% of their time, instead of devoting 95% of their day to try to eat humans' food, drink humans' beer, and constantly fly close to humans' faces and sting them without provocation them even though there is absolutely nothing edible at all on or around people's heads...



And hibernating in my attic, where I cheerfully spray Raid in on a daily basis come the spring to kill the lot of them before they have chance to make their nests and breed more aggressive stripy fuckers.


----------



## kabbes (Jun 8, 2020)

There’s a wasps nest in the door of our shed.  It’s really quite beautiful.  I seem to be able to move in and out without the wasps bothering me in the slightest.


----------



## T & P (Jun 8, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Being calm is the key - I think Mr Waspy was just a bit weary and felt like a rest, so landed on my face.  I just let it do it's thing, and eventually it flew off.


Sadly it doesn't always work, even if the wasp wasn't intending to sting you. Last October I was minding my own business with a group of friends at a small street beer festival in Berlin, and there was a number of wasps about that were extremely bothersome to all, flying not only around food and drinks, whether discarded or held by people, but very close to folks' faces, landing on heads etc. It was constant and relentless. And at some point I felt a very light tickling sensation behind my earlobe, instinstively went to scratch it, and got stung behind the fucking earlobe by a cunt with wings.

Now, like most people I tend to have regular showers, and I know for a fact there was nothing on my face, let alone behind my ears, that would have been of the least interest to any creature looking for nutrients. So I can only conclude wasps are fully sentient and self-conscious beings who, come the autumn, like to sting people out of spite because they know they're about to die soon and they might as well take their frustrations on others like the little cunts they are.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 8, 2020)

kabbes said:


> There’s a wasps nest in the door of our shed.  It’s really quite beautiful.  I seem to be able to move in and out without the wasps bothering me in the slightest.


They’re just biding their time


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 8, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> They’re just biding their time


No, it's because kabbes is clearly nice to the lovely wasps so they live in harmony.  Maybe the haters could try that approach instead?


----------



## Roadkill (Jun 8, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> No, it's because kabbes is clearly nice to the lovely wasps so they live in harmony.  Maybe the haters could try that approach instead?



Or we could just kill more wasps.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 8, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> No, it's because kabbes is clearly nice to the lovely wasps so they live in harmony.  Maybe the haters could try that approach instead?



They are, just like fucking seagulls, anti-social psychotic airborne scumbags.


----------



## krink (Jun 8, 2020)

I love wasps and have been stung a few times. The last time it was multiple stings on the face and legs (accidentally upset some near the nest). They are incredible creatures and are quite useful for gardeners and people who like to eat food. 

now horseflies, those fuckers can perish!!


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 8, 2020)

Wasps have caused me to split my head open by head butting a JCB and also to cause a lorry fire on the M180.
But I don’t hate wasps, because they are ruled by instinct and just want to survive.
Tories, I hate Tories, they choose to be bastards.


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 8, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 216622


Is it Bruce Dern in Silent Running, (the budget version)?


----------



## Raheem (Jun 8, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> Wasps have caused me to split my head open by head butting a JCB and also to cause a lorry fire on the M180.
> But I don’t hate wasps, because they are ruled by instinct and just want to survive.
> Tories, I hate Tories, they choose to be bastards.


Tories just follow their instincts too, on occasion.


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 8, 2020)

Raheem said:


> Tories just follow their instincts too, on occasion.


Bastards! It’s learnt at the nannies knee.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 8, 2020)

Time to vote -



			https://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/wasps-are-c-nts-the-poll.370989/


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 8, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 8, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Time to vote -
> 
> 
> 
> https://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/wasps-are-c-nts-the-poll.370989/


Fuck you yer twathead!


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 8, 2020)

Should wasps be added to the thread title?


----------



## existentialist (Jun 8, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> Should wasps be added to the thread title?


Sick burn, man


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 9, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Sick burn, man


Purely unintentional!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 9, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Jun 9, 2020)




----------



## Sasaferrato (Jun 9, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> I also got an infected sting in my crotch. Was a beecunt that time. Went a bit mad apparently




You or the bee?


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 9, 2020)

Sasaferrato said:


> You or the bee?


Me, I was delirious and hallucinating


----------



## Sasaferrato (Jun 9, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



Area of EU  4.476 million km². Pop 747,000,000. Pop density 6 per sq Km.

Area of UK 242,495 km². Pop 68,000,000. Pop density 280 per sq Km.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 9, 2020)




----------



## petee (Jun 9, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 10, 2020)

From today's Times


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 10, 2020)

He never wanted to get on any bus!


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 10, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> He never wanted to get on any bus!


Spend time in proximity to plebs?  God forbid.  

I still hope he develops late onset major sequelae from COVID-19 and shuffles off his rancid mortal coil.


----------



## RubyToogood (Jun 10, 2020)

Have we had this? Is it too late in the week?


----------



## MrSki (Jun 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 10, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Jun 10, 2020)

RubyToogood said:


> Have we had this? Is it too late in the week?




Some great comments in that


----------



## MrSki (Jun 11, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (Jun 11, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Jun 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 11, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 11, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 11, 2020)

I can't even. Can almost understand a burger or some other foods people miss but coffee!


----------



## dessiato (Jun 11, 2020)

Badgers said:


> I can't even. Can almost understand a burger or some other foods people miss but coffee!



People drink Starbucks coffee to be able to say they go to Starbucks. Not because they like coffee.


----------



## Badgers (Jun 11, 2020)

dessiato said:


> People drink Starbucks coffee to be able to say they go to Starbucks. Not because they like coffee.


So just say it then 

I drink Veuve Clicquot for the record


----------



## Yossarian (Jun 11, 2020)

Sasaferrato said:


> Area of EU  4.476 million km². Pop 747,000,000. Pop density 6 per sq Km.
> 
> Area of UK 242,495 km². Pop 68,000,000. Pop density 280 per sq Km.



You missed out a couple of numbers there - the population density of the EU is 166 per km2, according to your figures, not that population density seems to necessarily be connected to infection rates anyway.


----------



## existentialist (Jun 11, 2020)

dessiato said:


> People drink Starbucks coffee to be able to say they go to Starbucks. Not because they like coffee.


Or because there's no alternative _stares hard at his college_


----------



## Sasaferrato (Jun 11, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> You missed out a couple of numbers there - the population density of the EU is 166 per km2, according to your figures, not that population density seems to necessarily be connected to infection rates anyway.


----------



## kabbes (Jun 11, 2020)

Sasaferrato said:


>



That’s area per population.


----------



## dessiato (Jun 11, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Or because there's no alternative _stares hard at his college_


You could make your own or take in your own drinks.


----------



## existentialist (Jun 11, 2020)

dessiato said:


> You could make your own or take in your own drinks.


I could. But there are no facilities to make my own, and I've usually got more pressing things to do than start filling Thermoses with coffee. Mostly, I just don't bother buying the coffee, mostly.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 11, 2020)

My workplace canteen is too cramped for safe tea and coffee making. We may install a new one before the place fully reopens, but think Greggs are going to get a big upswing in business from people who can’t heat up their own lunches or make their own drinks


----------



## Yossarian (Jun 12, 2020)

Sasaferrato said:


>



4.476 million is 4,476,000, not 4,476,000,000 - 4,476,000,000 square kilometers would be about nine times the surface area of Earth.


----------



## two sheds (Jun 12, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> 4.476 million is 4,476,000, not 4,476,000,000 - 4,476,000,000 square kilometers would be about nine times the surface area of Earth.



Not with Priti Patel mathematics it isn't


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jun 12, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> 4.476 million is 4,476,000, not 4,476,000,000 - 4,476,000,000 square kilometers would be about nine times the surface area of Earth.


Come on, give him a chance. At least let him get to grips with population density before ripping into him


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 13, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Jun 13, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 217460


Aargh! The random capitalisation is making my eyes itch 😬😬


----------



## Sprocket. (Jun 14, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> My workplace canteen is too cramped for safe tea and coffee making. We may install a new one before the place fully reopens, but think Greggs are going to get a big upswing in business from people who can’t heat up their own lunches or make their own drinks



I’m off work at the moment but this is the current set up.
The loneliness of the socially distanced engineer.
Sent to me by one of those stalwarts of industry I work with.


----------



## hegley (Jun 15, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Jun 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 16, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 217883


Someone told me at the weekend that Belgium has the highest deaths per million  

Do you have a link or reliable source as I was sure we were #1


----------



## dessiato (Jun 16, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Someone told me at the weekend that Belgium has the highest deaths per million
> 
> Do you have a link or reliable source as I was sure we were #1


Global data lab at the New Scientist according to the pic. I got it via a friend.


----------



## two sheds (Jun 16, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I got it via a friend.



Say no more :taps nose:


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jun 16, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Someone told me at the weekend that Belgium has the highest deaths per million
> 
> Do you have a link or reliable source as I was sure we were #1


----------



## existentialist (Jun 16, 2020)

Course, these are only the quarter-finals. Wait until the semis (aka "second wave") to see who the real winners are...


----------



## dessiato (Jun 16, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Say no more :taps nose:


The picture says it originates from New Scientist which is a very reputable paper.


----------



## tony.c (Jun 16, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Someone told me at the weekend that Belgium has the highest deaths per million
> 
> Do you have a link or reliable source as I was sure we were #1


Belgium gives the number of deaths in excess of the same period last year. Other countries give number of deaths in hospitals, or deaths in nursing homes and hospitals, or deaths where coronavirus has been confirmed prior to death or by autopsy after death. UK's figures are the two latter, but misses deaths which have not been confirmed as due to coronavirus before or after death. Many deaths at home or in nursing homes are recorded as being from other causes though could well be from covid-19.
Belgium's figures are likely to be closest to actual covid deaths.








						Belgium's coronavirus (over)counting controversy | DW | 02.06.2020
					

Belgium has been blasted for its seemingly sky-high death toll from COVID-19. But as Teri Schultz explains, Belgian experts have argued it's undercounting that should be under scrutiny.




					www.dw.com
				




The figures from the Office for National Statistics do give the difference between UK deaths and the same period averaged over the last five years.They are saying that the covid 19 period is around 64,500 more than the same period average over the last five years, while Government figures for covid deaths is 41,969 to date.








						UK records around 64,500 excess deaths during pandemic, ONS official says
					

About 64,500 more people than usual have died in the United Kingdom during this year's coronavirus pandemic, an expert from the Office for National Statistics said on Tuesday.




					www.reuters.com


----------



## quimcunx (Jun 17, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 19, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jun 19, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Jun 19, 2020)

Yes I am sure that Apple and Google are the go to guys to discuss privacy and security with.

Absolutely top lads them guys.


----------



## HAL9000 (Jun 20, 2020)

..


----------



## A380 (Jun 20, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jun 21, 2020)

Too soon?


----------



## Badgers (Jun 21, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jun 21, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> Yes I am sure that Apple and Google are the go to guys to discuss privacy and security with.
> 
> Absolutely top lads them guys.



indeed.  it is something of achievement on the part of government to make them look trustworthy (in comparison to a bunch of dominic cummings's chums)


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 22, 2020)




----------



## nogojones (Jun 22, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Jun 22, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Jun 22, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Jun 23, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Jun 24, 2020)

__





						Redirect Notice
					





					www.google.com
				




How on Earth did that clear up every step of the process and ended up as a cutout figure on the stands without someone recognising who it was?


----------



## Yossarian (Jun 24, 2020)

Did he even support Leeds?


----------



## Raheem (Jun 24, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> Did he even support Leeds?


Arsenal, I believe.

(Google it)


----------



## MrSki (Jun 24, 2020)

Raheem said:


> Arsenal, I believe.
> 
> (Google it)


Yeah he was a gooner.


----------



## T & P (Jun 24, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Yeah he was a gooner.


I heard that too, but what was it based on? Am I right to say there’s a photo of him in his younger days wearing an Arsenal top?


----------



## Raheem (Jun 24, 2020)

T & P said:


> I heard that too, but what was it based on? Am I right to say there’s a photo of him in his younger days wearing an Arsenal top?


Are you worried about people judging him when it's not proven?


----------



## MrSki (Jun 24, 2020)

Osama Bin Laden: The Death of a Die-Hard Arsenal Fan
					

Arsenal  have many a celebrity fan, from Kevin Costner to Jay-Z to Colin Firth. And now it appears the most hated man on earth was also a diehard Gooner...




					bleacherreport.com
				




Supposedly he bought a Nigel Winterburn duvet cover.   




__





						Osama bin Laden's Highbury days
					






					www.telegraph.co.uk


----------



## A380 (Jun 25, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Jun 26, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Jun 27, 2020)

I spent a lot of time in Florida, although these people are a minority, it’s a large minority.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 27, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I spent a lot of time in Florida, although these people are a minority, it’s a large minority.




What a bunch of fucking loons.


----------



## dessiato (Jun 27, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> What a bunch of fucking loons.


It’s a long time since I was regularly visiting Florida but this way of thinking was very common.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jun 27, 2020)

dessiato said:


> I spent a lot of time in Florida, although these people are a minority, it’s a large minority.



Sadly plenty of similar idiots in the UK.


----------



## chainsawjob (Jun 27, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Jun 28, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 28, 2020)

This had totally passed me by, the Rolling Stones released a lock-down themed song in April, their first single in about 8 years, some of the You Tube are mildly amusing.


I think these guys have a future.
all the pandemic was just a conspiracy to let them record this video
If Keith Richards met the Coronavirus, the Coronavirus would need to self isolate.
Keith Richards: Covid 19? I smoked that in the seventies.
When Keith Richards goes grocery shopping, the Corona virus puts on a mask.


----------



## Mation (Jun 28, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> This had totally passed me by, the Rolling Stones released a lock-down themed song in April, their first single in about 8 years, some of the You Tube are mildly amusing.
> 
> 
> I think these guys have a future.
> ...



That's not as embarrassing as it might have been!


----------



## Orang Utan (Jun 28, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Jun 28, 2020)

Soz link gone...


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jun 28, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Jun 28, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Jun 29, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Jun 29, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Jun 29, 2020)

Could just put a sign saying "Beware of the alligators"


----------



## T & P (Jun 29, 2020)

"Meat eaters are destroying the planet, and depriving us of our swimming pools".


----------



## quiet guy (Jun 29, 2020)

Does that mean that the vegans and vegetarians are ok to use it?


----------



## mx wcfc (Jun 29, 2020)

Sincere apologies everyone for this, but in particular to  sojourner and Attila the Stockbroker for pinching bits of their IP for the best 2 lines of this.  After listening to Attila ranting tonight on fb and then spotting something on sojourner's FB (and it must be said, several pints of ale), I couldn't help myself:-

"Thank god for Johnson - he’s in charge

Of unlockdown, (by and large)

The pubs have got the all clear

Just to cover Cummings rear

He opened up the restaurants too

So Desmond’s bribe can slip straight through.

The Russia report kept in the dark

But Look! He’s opened up the park!

You can go shopping in the town,

(Except for Leicester, cos that’s closed down)

Testiculating everywhere

 He’s juggling with diarrhoea.


----------



## Espresso (Jun 29, 2020)

This is the promotional pic for a touring production of Mamma Mia that's (hopefully) going to be touring next year.


I see Dominic Cummings in there, in a blue hat.  
I think I might be getting cabin fever.


----------



## Mation (Jun 30, 2020)

Espresso said:


> This is the promotional pic for a touring production of Mamma Mia that's (hopefully) going to be touring next year.
> View attachment 220147
> 
> I see Dominic Cummings in there, in a blue hat.
> I think I might be getting cabin fever.


That's a really weird picture! Aside from the uber whiteness, it looks like they were all photographed alone and have then been shopped into a group pic, with shadows added for realism


----------



## kabbes (Jun 30, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Does that mean that the vegans and vegetarians are ok to use it?


No, because the meat eaters have ruined it


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 30, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Jun 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 220180


Sadly it will only be a matter of time before somone calls their bluff.


----------



## clicker (Jun 30, 2020)

T & P said:


> Sadly it will only be a matter of time before somone calls their bluff.


Or buff.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 30, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Jun 30, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (Jun 30, 2020)

Espresso said:


> This is the promotional pic for a touring production of Mamma Mia that's (hopefully) going to be touring next year.
> View attachment 220147
> 
> I see Dominic Cummings in there, in a blue hat.
> I think I might be getting cabin fever.



No, it's not just you.  That's just plain weird: it looks like a Cold War Steve composition.  Speaking of whom, he's on form atm:


----------



## T & P (Jun 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 220192


Come to think of it, a lot of protagonists/ superheroes from various universes from Star Wars to Marvel to DC Comics are also orphans.

Has anybody who’s had a happy childhood &   family life and whose parents are still alive  and enjoying their retirement years ever stepped in to save the day, never mind the world? Enjoy your cosy, well-adjusted life you selfish bastards.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 1, 2020)

T & P said:


> Sadly it will only be a matter of time before somone calls their bluff.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 1, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Jul 1, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Jul 1, 2020)

Who the fuck are those twats and why have I seen their faces on several memes in the last cople of days?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 1, 2020)

T & P said:


> Who the fuck are those twats and why have I seen their faces on several memes in the last cople of days?


----------



## ddraig (Jul 1, 2020)

T & P said:


> Who the fuck are those twats and why have I seen their faces on several memes in the last cople of days?


They came out of their mansion and pointed guns at a BLM march afaik
Rich lawyers or something


----------



## T & P (Jul 1, 2020)

They seem such a nice couple... 

She's also holding her gun as if it was a garden hose


----------



## quiet guy (Jul 1, 2020)

Self entitled shitheads


----------



## quiet guy (Jul 1, 2020)

Double post


----------



## two sheds (Jul 1, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> Double post


well there are two of them


----------



## pesh (Jul 1, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Jul 1, 2020)

T & P said:


> They seem such a nice couple...
> 
> She's also holding her gun as if it was a garden hose


If I were her husband I'm not sure I'd be too keen on her walking back and forth behind me like that either seeing as she already has her finger on the trigger by the looks of it.


----------



## DotCommunist (Jul 1, 2020)

the couples gun safety skills were roundly mocked on social medias. Odd thing, when a 'idiots with guns' post goes viral in america theres always someone (often more than one) in the comments deriding the weaponry and/or stances etc. 'Thats firing pistol ammo, all the tacticool in the world can't make that less of a pussy gun' was one I saw on the anti lockdown protests over there.


----------



## A380 (Jul 1, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Jul 1, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Jul 1, 2020)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Jul 2, 2020)




----------



## blairsh (Jul 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 2, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Jul 2, 2020)




----------



## William of Walworth (Jul 2, 2020)

That Freddie one (#3,782 just above) is fucking brilliant IMO


----------



## kabbes (Jul 2, 2020)

It’s been shown soooooo often though...


----------



## William of Walworth (Jul 2, 2020)

kabbes said:


> It’s been shown soooooo often though...



But for the first time *on here*, I'm nearly sure .... ?

(I'm not on Facebook much, and on Twitter never!   )


----------



## emanymton (Jul 3, 2020)

William of Walworth said:


> But for the first time *on here*, I'm nearly sure .... ?
> 
> (I'm not on Facebook much, and on Twitter never!   )


It has been shared on here loads of times.


----------



## William of Walworth (Jul 3, 2020)

emanymton said:


> It has been shared on here loads of times.



Just one of those things (and no more than that!  ) that I haven't seen it then I suppose.

I _thought_ I'd been following this particular thread  consistently, but there must have been more gaps in what I saw than I realised .... 

It was still a great image anyway!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 3, 2020)




----------



## editor (Jul 3, 2020)




----------



## Tankus (Jul 3, 2020)

no mask ..no entry

_"dude  ...this is  ...I am legend"_

Christ_ ,_ coronas lifted a rock


----------



## MrSki (Jul 3, 2020)

Tankus said:


> no mask ..no entry
> 
> _"dude  ...this is  ...I am legend"_
> 
> Christ_ ,_ coronas lifted a rock



But no-one in there seems to be wearing a mask?


----------



## two sheds (Jul 3, 2020)

They also don't seem to be batshit warped in there either


----------



## Tankus (Jul 3, 2020)

winter is coming


----------



## dessiato (Jul 4, 2020)

Not a meme, but it made me smile.

Man offers to resign after showering during live video meeting









						Man offers to resign after showering during live video meeting
					

Bernardo Bustillo mistakenly left his video on while attempting to multi-task by showering while listening to an online meeting




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## gentlegreen (Jul 4, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 4, 2020)

ETA : Its fake apparently


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 4, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Jul 4, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Not a meme, but it made me smile.
> 
> Man offers to resign after showering during live video meeting
> 
> ...





> But *like a 2020-specific anxiety dream*, as his colleagues considered plans to clean-up a local river, an image of him showering appeared on bottom left of the screen, much of it blurred by a pane of frosted glass. The sound of running water drowned out the constant ringing of his mobile phone, as frantic colleagues tried to warn him that the camera was still rolling.
> 
> A wave of discomfort rippled across the videochat as he got out of the shower. “Say something to Berni. Say something to him quickly,” one colleague could be heard saying. Another asked: “We can’t disconnect him or do something?” The mayor swiftly took control, bringing an end to the meeting.


This bit made me laugh like my dad does.  😂  😂


----------



## two sheds (Jul 4, 2020)

none of that would have been needed if they just hadn't shared it to the world afterwards


----------



## gentlegreen (Jul 4, 2020)




----------



## ska invita (Jul 4, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> View attachment 220831


not far from reality


----------



## T & P (Jul 4, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Jul 4, 2020)

I feel sad for piglet


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Jul 4, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Jul 4, 2020)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 220886
> 
> 
> 
> ...


We're Roo. I always liked Roo.


----------



## spring-peeper (Jul 4, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> We're Roo. I always liked Roo.




eeyore!!!


----------



## phillm (Jul 4, 2020)

Fauci is on the conspiracy + Nostradamus. 

_The big delta between Dr. Fauci and Nostradamus boils down to the ability to predict the future. Beyond Nostradamus’ uncanny ability to predict the first two World Wars, two of the three “antichrists” in Napoleon and Hitler, the assassinations of U.S. presidents, and the 9/11 attack on the Twin Towers centuries before the events happened, Fauci predicted a pandemic in 2017, a measly three years before it took place._









						Dr. Fauci is No Nostradamus: How COVID-19 Ran Amok Under His Watch - Vaxxter
					

Dr. Fauci shared his foresight with medical peers at a Georgetown forum when he stated, "There will be a surprise outbreak during Trump's first term."




					vaxxter.com


----------



## sideboob (Jul 5, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Jul 5, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Jul 5, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Jul 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 5, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Jul 6, 2020)

Another geeky meme I'm not actually qualified to share.


----------



## prunus (Jul 6, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Another geeky meme I'm not actually qualified to share.
> 
> View attachment 221080



The mask needs to be a bit more substantial then that really, thick gauze or cotton at least.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 6, 2020)




----------



## Numbers (Jul 6, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Another geeky meme I'm not actually qualified to share.
> 
> View attachment 221080


Someone may correct me but it’s a way of saying stay at home (127. 0.0.0 is local host) and use a mask (255.0.0.0 is a subnet mask).


----------



## Numbers (Jul 6, 2020)

Need one with this on - Protect the NHS

01010000 01110010 01101111 01110100 01100101 01100011 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101110 01101000 01110011


----------



## quiet guy (Jul 6, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 221086



Think she been sent the Katie Hopkins version


----------



## Badgers (Jul 7, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Jul 7, 2020)

phillm said:


> Fauci is on the conspiracy + Nostradamus.
> 
> _The big delta between Dr. Fauci and Nostradamus boils down to the ability to predict the future. Beyond Nostradamus’ uncanny ability to predict the first two World Wars, two of the three “antichrists” in Napoleon and Hitler, the assassinations of U.S. presidents, and the 9/11 attack on the Twin Towers centuries before the events happened, Fauci predicted a pandemic in 2017, a measly three years before it took place._
> 
> ...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 7, 2020)




----------



## Petcha (Jul 7, 2020)

Hancock admits track and trace app was developed for Nokia 3310
					

THE health secretary has admitted that the government’s 'world beating' track and trace app failed because it was developed for a 20-year-old phone.




					www.thedailymash.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Jul 7, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 8, 2020)




----------



## 2hats (Jul 8, 2020)

Possibly the best thread for this.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jul 8, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Jul 8, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Jul 8, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Jul 8, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Jul 8, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 221402


Christ. (Literally.)

I've been looking at this picture for longer than I'm comfortable with 

_scratches another bar into the days without physical contact wall chart tally_


----------



## gosub (Jul 9, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 9, 2020)

Let me know how it gets on on twatter if you repost


----------



## Teaboy (Jul 9, 2020)

The phrase "dishy rishi" is not only horrible to the eyes it actually humanises these monsters.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 9, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> The phrase "dishy rishi" is not only horrible to the eyes it actually humanises these monsters.



The papers love their nicknames so blame them not me.


----------



## Raheem (Jul 9, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> The phrase "dishy rishi" is not only horrible to the eyes it actually humanises these monsters.


OTOH, if we turn a blind eye and allow that template to become established, we can have Twatty Matty, Shitty Priti, Crappy Shappy, Scabby Raaby, and so on.


----------



## kabbes (Jul 9, 2020)

I’m not one to dwell in any way on physical appearance but surely Rishi Sunak is the last person one would apply the epithet “dishy” to.


----------



## Raheem (Jul 9, 2020)

He's an MP, so it's a bit relative.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jul 9, 2020)

kabbes said:


> I’m not one to dwell in any way on physical appearance but surely Rishi Sunak is the last person one would apply the epithet “dishy” to.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 10, 2020)

Fucking hell, they don't mess about down under, when it comes to enforcing lockdown - Birthday party raided, 16 people fined a total of A$26,000, about £14,300 or £890 per person.   



> All 16 people were fined by police.
> 
> "That is $26,000 that birthday party is costing them.
> 
> "That is a heck of a birthday party to recall. They will remember that one for a long time."











						'Ridiculous behaviour': Party-goers betrayed by late-night KFC run as coronavirus fines ramp up
					

Victorian police issue a warning to people tempted to breach stay at home orders, saying they won't be as lenient as last time when it comes to dishing out fines.




					www.abc.net.au


----------



## MrSki (Jul 10, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Jul 10, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Jul 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 11, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Jul 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 12, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Jul 12, 2020)

Ready, aim, fire


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 12, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jul 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 12, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Jul 12, 2020)

Pinched off Twitter


There is a joke circulating in the commonwealth: "What borders on stupidity?"

"Scotland and Wales!"





https://twitter.com/PranMan/status/1282269185503043585


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 13, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Jul 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 14, 2020)

My brother's face-masks have arrived.


----------



## Teaboy (Jul 14, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> My brother's face-masks have arrived.
> 
> View attachment 222232



We brought a pack of about 8 material face coverings and one of them was quite like that.  Its in the bottom of the drawer and hasn't been used.  I don't mind a bit of gallows humour but I decided that there is enough fear and anxiety out there at the moment and it just didn't seem very funny, sorry.  See also people wearing plague masks.


----------



## Saul Goodman (Jul 14, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> We brought a pack of about 8 material face coverings and one of them was quite like that.  Its in the bottom of the drawer and hasn't been used.  I don't mind a bit of gallows humour but I decided that there is enough fear and anxiety out there at the moment and it just didn't seem very funny, sorry.  See also people wearing plague masks.


What about these?






Do they pass the Victor Meldrew/No-Humour-Allowed test?


----------



## existentialist (Jul 14, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> We brought a pack of about 8 material face coverings and one of them was quite like that.  Its in the bottom of the drawer and hasn't been used.  I don't mind a bit of gallows humour but I decided that there is enough fear and anxiety out there at the moment and it just didn't seem very funny, sorry.  See also people wearing plague masks.


Yes, I don't think I'd wear something like that, either. I am quite admiring of the amazing range of creativity on display re masks - OU's fluorescent DPM ones were quite eyecatching  - but I am not sure I could see myself wearing anything other than a plain one. I save my sartorial extravagances for shoes and suits.


----------



## existentialist (Jul 14, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Yes, I don't think I'd wear something like that, either. I am quite admiring of the amazing range of creativity on display re masks - OU's fluorescent DPM ones were quite eyecatching  - but I am not sure I could see myself wearing anything other than a plain one. I save my sartorial extravagances for shoes and suits.


And dinner jackets.


----------



## pesh (Jul 14, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Jul 14, 2020)

How is the emu?


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 15, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Jul 15, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 222341


I fear they will come to regret making this so easy to crop below 'how did he know what was coming?'


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 15, 2020)

<removed by request>


----------



## T & P (Jul 15, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Jul 15, 2020)

Drawing by Walter Molino from 1962 entitled: "Life in 2022"

 reposted from Weird Vintage International


----------



## belboid (Jul 15, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Drawing by Walter Molino from 1962 entitled: "Life in 2022"
> 
> reposted from Weird Vintage International
> 
> ...


I don’t really see hats becoming so popular again.


----------



## tony.c (Jul 15, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Jul 15, 2020)

Very tempted to go the crochet route for my first washable mask.


----------



## editor (Jul 15, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Jul 15, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 222389


The secret of successful meetings!


----------



## Epona (Jul 15, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 222389



I suspect more is achieved that way


----------



## Orang Utan (Jul 15, 2020)

belboid said:


> I don’t really see hats becoming so popular again.


It seems that in the 20s a future of not wearing hats was as unimaginable as public mass transit


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 16, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Jul 16, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 16, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Jul 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 16, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 17, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Jul 17, 2020)




----------



## ska invita (Jul 17, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


>



not sure about the reasoning on that - the telegraph economist for example reasoned a "cull" would be good for the economy
the reason to shutdown is above all a moral health reason rather than an economic one


----------



## HAL9000 (Jul 17, 2020)

T & P said:


> View attachment 222650



clearly the second picture is wrong because the mouth is not covered but this is fine..


----------



## yield (Jul 17, 2020)

ska invita said:


> not sure about the reasoning on that - the telegraph economist for example reasoned a "cull" would be good for the economy
> the reason to shutdown is above all a moral health reason rather than an economic one


Got a link for that telegraph please ska invita ?


----------



## Signal 11 (Jul 17, 2020)

yield said:


> Got a link for that telegraph please ska invita ?











						Does the Fed know something the rest of us do not with its panicked interest rate cut?
					

Cue the sound of trumpets and galloping hooves.




					www.telegraph.co.uk
				





> Not to put too fine a point on it, from an entirely disinterested economic perspective, the COVID-19 might even prove mildly beneficial in the long term by disproportionately culling elderly dependents.


----------



## two sheds (Jul 17, 2020)

Signal 11 said:


> Does the Fed know something the rest of us do not with its panicked interest rate cut?
> 
> 
> Cue the sound of trumpets and galloping hooves.
> ...





> Not to put too fine a point on it, from an entirely disinterested nazi perspective, the COVID-19 might even prove mildly beneficial in the long term by disproportionately culling elderly dependents



Corrected for them


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jul 18, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Jul 18, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Jul 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 19, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Jul 19, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Jul 19, 2020)




----------



## magneze (Jul 19, 2020)

The nasal covering is more effective than the guns. Was any thought put into making that one?


----------



## Yossarian (Jul 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 20, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Jul 20, 2020)

Those last four posts hit the nail sharply on the head.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 20, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Jul 20, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 223004


Sparky is a bitch.


----------



## existentialist (Jul 20, 2020)

dessiato said:


> Sparky is a bitch.


She speaks highly of you, too.


----------



## fishfinger (Jul 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 21, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 21, 2020)




----------



## 8ball (Jul 21, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 222813



Of course, your eye membranes are still exposed when wearing a mask.
Get shopping or it will be compulsory goggles next month!


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 21, 2020)




----------



## 8ball (Jul 21, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 223128



meta


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 21, 2020)

8ball said:


> meta


indeed


----------



## Aladdin (Jul 21, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Jul 21, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 221587



Post #2646

😁


----------



## A380 (Jul 22, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Jul 22, 2020)




----------



## krtek a houby (Jul 22, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 223225



Don't steal it from dogs, mind


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jul 22, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Don't steal it from dogs, mind


Probably get away with it you hypnotise them first.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Jul 22, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Jul 22, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 223241


That would make it hard for Kirk to show someone more of this Earth thing called ‘kissing’.


----------



## Raheem (Jul 22, 2020)

They have masks, but they are not distancing. Highly illogical.


----------



## krtek a houby (Jul 22, 2020)

Raheem said:


> They have masks, but they are not distancing. Highly illogical.



Red shirt is all about freedom, mind.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jul 22, 2020)

probably not genuine, but doing the rounds


----------



## dessiato (Jul 23, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Red shirt is all about freedom, mind.


He's the one who is going to die.


----------



## Mation (Jul 23, 2020)

8ball said:


> compulsory goggles


  


Although I don't know why I'm laughing given the state of 2020 thus far. Compulsory goggles could become entirely plausible in a matter of minutes!


----------



## Mation (Jul 23, 2020)

Oh god 

We'd call it 2020 vision


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jul 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Jul 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 24, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jul 24, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 223446


Think of the splinters.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 24, 2020)




----------



## editor (Jul 24, 2020)

I hope everyone realises that when once we get the mandatory Bill Gates nano-chipped vaccine (probably via 5G) we'll be waking up and making this noise every morning


----------



## belboid (Jul 24, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Jul 24, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Think of the splinters.


You bragging


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 25, 2020)




----------



## MickiQ (Jul 25, 2020)

Sadly being that stupid is all  that common, this is the downside of civilisation, those that would normally have been eaten by predators survive to threaten the rest of us.


----------



## chainsawjob (Jul 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 25, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Jul 25, 2020)




----------



## High Voltage (Jul 26, 2020)

MickiQ said:


> Sadly being that stupid is all  that common, this is the downside of civilisation, those that would normally have been eaten by predators survive to threaten the rest of us.


I have been saying pretty much this for years. We are now witnessing the survival of the thickest in all its glory


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 26, 2020)

/


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Jul 26, 2020)

The only “wtf” is that Snopes had to release an article to debunk this nonsense


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 26, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> The only “wtf” is that Snopes had to release an article to debunk this nonsense



Blimey, so they have. 









						Does Googling Any 3-Digit Number Followed by 'New Cases' Reveal COVID-19 Conspiracy?
					

On the contrary, testing this conspiracy theory actually proves the opposite of what it imagines.




					www.snopes.com


----------



## Cadmus (Jul 26, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Jul 26, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Jul 26, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Jul 26, 2020)




----------



## krink (Jul 26, 2020)

Cadmus said:


> View attachment 223749


It's the "luggage for a family of five" under my eyes that I want to hide and now my mask underlines it 😭


----------



## krtek a houby (Jul 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 27, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Jul 27, 2020)

(blurred to = SFW)

Hancock on the grave of Fatch


----------



## Pickman's model (Jul 27, 2020)

brogdale said:


> (blurred to = SFW)
> 
> Hancock on the grave of Fatch
> 
> View attachment 223934



don't know where handcock's getting his information but as any fule kno her remains languish at the royal hospital, chelsea


----------



## brogdale (Jul 27, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> View attachment 223935
> don't know where handcock's getting his information but as any fule kno her remains languish at the royal hospital, chelsea


So they say...


----------



## danski (Jul 27, 2020)

Nicked from b3ta.com


----------



## dessiato (Jul 28, 2020)




----------



## Numbers (Jul 28, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> View attachment 223935
> don't know where handcock's getting his information but as any fule kno her remains languish at the royal hospital, chelsea


For some reason I read that as ‘her fumes languish...’


----------



## dessiato (Jul 28, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jul 28, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 223241


they probably used the life support belts the animated series used so it didn't have to draw space suits


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 28, 2020)




----------



## NoXion (Jul 28, 2020)

Wear your mask properly.


----------



## chainsawjob (Jul 28, 2020)




----------



## krink (Jul 29, 2020)

Her feet are tiny


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 29, 2020)

Well, as long as they get them to wear one...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 29, 2020)




----------



## editor (Jul 29, 2020)




----------



## editor (Jul 29, 2020)

Moved here as it's not funny: Coronavirus Conspiracy Corner


----------



## brogdale (Jul 29, 2020)

Ireland (Cork) apparently


----------



## MrSki (Jul 29, 2020)

Corona beer rebranded.


----------



## MrSki (Jul 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 30, 2020)




----------



## editor (Jul 30, 2020)




----------



## 8ball (Jul 30, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 224076



It's the most religious thing since the clapping tbf.
If they'd kept that up people would have expected them to stop fucking the NHS over, though.


----------



## brogdale (Jul 30, 2020)

CWS on our _world beating _status...


----------



## Badgers (Jul 30, 2020)

brogdale said:


> CWS on our _world beating _status...
> 
> View attachment 224357


No sign of Cilla?


----------



## Roadkill (Jul 30, 2020)

brogdale said:


> (blurred to = SFW)
> 
> Hancock on the grave of Fatch
> 
> View attachment 223934



_sees dinner a second time_


----------



## Numbers (Jul 30, 2020)

Badgers said:


> No sign of Cilla?


Or Steve McFadden


----------



## Badgers (Jul 30, 2020)

Numbers said:


> Or Steve McFadden


Found them both in the windows


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 31, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Jul 31, 2020)

That's going to end up in that woman/cat meme, isn't it?


----------



## Sprocket. (Jul 31, 2020)

chainsawjob said:


> View attachment 224100


If that stick is six foot they must be nearly ten feet tall!


----------



## quimcunx (Jul 31, 2020)

existentialist said:


> That's going to end up in that woman/cat meme, isn't it?



Here to serve.


----------



## existentialist (Jul 31, 2020)

quimcunx said:


> Here to serve.
> 
> View attachment 224438


Perfect. Well, nearly perfect...


----------



## Numbers (Jul 31, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Found them both in the windows


I can't see Cilla


----------



## quimcunx (Jul 31, 2020)

Pff.


----------



## MrSki (Jul 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 31, 2020)

Day 42069.


----------



## dessiato (Jul 31, 2020)




----------



## smmudge (Jul 31, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 224518



Trying to find where that's from (yes I know but I can't find it on Independent site), basically just curious which countries the weird lines are! Probably micro nations but still


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 31, 2020)

smmudge said:


> Trying to find where that's from (yes I know but I can't find it on Independent site), basically just curious which countries the weird lines are! Probably micro nations but still



It's a odd front page, considering The Independent ceased publication years ago.


----------



## smmudge (Jul 31, 2020)

I found it on the ONS site.

The line at the top, well starts at the top and comes down wiggly is Iceland. 

The one that bounces around at the bottom is Liechtenstein. 

There are lots of countries that basically had no excess mortality at all. We're pretty crap.


----------



## JimW (Aug 1, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Aug 1, 2020)

JimW said:


>



to be honest it was only because of an animation error.

Filmation didn't have brushes small enough.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 1, 2020)

ETA - Just noticed the first date is wrong, he attended the rally on 20th June.


----------



## Yossarian (Aug 1, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 1, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 1, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 1, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Aug 1, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


I just came here to post that.


----------



## dessiato (Aug 1, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Aug 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 2, 2020)




----------



## chainsawjob (Aug 2, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Aug 2, 2020)

Russian coronavirus memes


----------



## quiet guy (Aug 2, 2020)




----------



## petee (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Aug 3, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 224611


i thought it was because Disney has always been into killing off the parents


----------



## MrSki (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## prunus (Aug 3, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



At the risk of starting to get really boring on this subject: no you can’t.

“*Social contact*
If you live in one of the affected areas, in order to help prevent the spread of coronavirus, you should not:

meet people you do not live with inside a private home or garden, except where you have formed a support bubble (or for other limited exemptions to be specified in law)
visit someone else’s home or garden even if they live outside of the affected areas
*socialise with people you do not live with in other indoor public venues – such as pubs, restaurants, cafes, shops, places of worship, community centres, leisure and entertainment venues*, or visitor attractions. You may attend these venues with people you live with (or are in a support bubble with), but should avoid interaction with individuals or groups from other households. If you run such a business or organisation, you should take steps to ensure people do not interact with people they do not live with, in line with COVID-19 secure guidance”


----------



## Raheem (Aug 3, 2020)

What you're allowed to do and not do now mainly depends on how much research you've done and what legal advice you've taken on how much weight to give to the various conflicting sources of guidance.


----------



## MrSki (Aug 3, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 4, 2020)




----------



## petee (Aug 4, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Aug 4, 2020)

petee said:


>


Keeping yourself awake?


----------



## smmudge (Aug 4, 2020)

kabbes said:


> Keeping yourself awake?



While driving.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 4, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 4, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 5, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 5, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Aug 5, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 225080



Hema is much more fun and if you do polearms your laughing


----------



## MrSki (Aug 5, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Aug 5, 2020)

What is that MrSki ^^^  A lot of of potential dodgy-ness there.


----------



## MrSki (Aug 5, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> What is that MrSki ^^^  A lot of of potential dodgy-ness there.


A painting.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 5, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> What is that MrSki ^^^  A lot of of potential dodgy-ness there.



Just looks like a nurse, suffering from wearing a face mask for days on end, and Hancock with blood on his hands.


----------



## Epona (Aug 5, 2020)

It's Matt Hancock looking after the care sector by making sure that they got the same shopping hours as NHS staff

EDIT ( the "we're sending out CARE badges to make sure that carers have recognisable branding" thing)


----------



## Teaboy (Aug 5, 2020)

Why all the religious symbols?


----------



## Epona (Aug 5, 2020)

They represent graves


----------



## spitfire (Aug 5, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> What is that MrSki ^^^  A lot of of potential dodgy-ness there.



It's wefail, he paints scary pictures of tory cunts.



			https://twitter.com/wefail


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Aug 5, 2020)

Literally nothing exists which cannot be made into an anime girl.





> Unlike other waifus, you need to actually go out and socialize to get her.


----------



## fishfinger (Aug 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 6, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Aug 6, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 225271


----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 6, 2020)

More here :- Grandma Gets Real


----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 7, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (Aug 7, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Aug 7, 2020)

.


----------



## elbows (Aug 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 8, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Aug 8, 2020)

FridgeMagnet said:


> Literally nothing exists which cannot be made into an anime girl.



After Ebola-Chan (who cameos in the video) there was no going back.


----------



## Orang Utan (Aug 8, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 225516


Maybe time to ditch Santa


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Aug 8, 2020)




----------



## petee (Aug 8, 2020)

FridgeMagnet said:


>




love that twitter


----------



## chainsawjob (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## sleaterkinney (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 9, 2020)

sleaterkinney said:


>



Strange people on the forum, to say the least.  Colloidal silver makes an appearance, unsurprisingly.


----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Strange people on the forum, to say the least.  Colloidal silver makes an appearance, unsurprisingly.



 I feel george may be pulling their legs.


----------



## two sheds (Aug 9, 2020)

sleaterkinney said:


>



Has anyone suggested having a facepalm smiley?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)

sleaterkinney said:


>


----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

Oh this guy's played a blinder...


----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

You have to read this one in a Limerick accent. (Or Cork, just watch Young Offenders if you need a hand).


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)

The link* being - Urban Dictionary: boat happy

*credit to a certain urb.


----------



## Orang Utan (Aug 9, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 225803
> 
> The link* being - Urban Dictionary: boat happy
> 
> *credit to a certain urb.


lol forgot about that


----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

It's gone for me. cupid_stunt are you still in there?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)

spitfire said:


> It's gone for me. cupid_stunt are you still in there?



Gone for me too.


----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

So much for Free Speech eh?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)

spitfire said:


> So much for Free Speech eh?



The love forum has gone, but the general forum remains...



Already over 80 views, but I suspect my account will be banned soon.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)

I got a reply.


----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

I couldn't register, got stuck in some weird password loop.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)

spitfire said:


> I couldn't register, got stuck in some weird password loop.



I had that, it hadn't actually given me the option of having a bloody password, so I just clicked 'forgotten password', and waited for the e-mail.


----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I had that, it hadn't actually given me the option of having a bloody password, so I just clicked 'forgotten password', and waited for the e-mail.



I tried that and ended up with the same again, gave up in the end.

Hopefully he'll spam my email address at one point and I'll be able to GDPR the prick.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2020)

I've been banned.


----------



## spitfire (Aug 9, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I've been banned.



Fascists.


----------



## Badgers (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## wayward bob (Aug 9, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I got a reply.
> 
> View attachment 225808


dubversion?


----------



## Badgers (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 9, 2020)




----------



## wayward bob (Aug 9, 2020)

went to a shop that's not the cornershop for the first time since march. everyone was extra considerate, patient and helpful.

go uk \o/


----------



## wayward bob (Aug 9, 2020)

not only do masks give me the heebie jeebies, but i've not been in a shop since march. is poss to make allowances?

oh no hang on it indicates my voting preference so have at it!


----------



## wayward bob (Aug 9, 2020)

srs Badgers that's divisive bullshit


----------



## spitfire (Aug 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 225862



Want.


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

wayward bob said:


> srs Badgers that's divisive bullshit


Have you seen the thread title and all it's pages of content?



> Coronavirus *meme*/panic/fear mongering general thread



There are allowances for people who physically can't wear masks. Sadly a selfish few are refusing to wear masks  much like those selfish people who refuse vaccinations and risk other people's lives.

If you have not been in a shop there is nothing to get worried about. If you are medically exempt then there is nothing to worry about.

Rest assured I understand the heebie jeebies. Am scared of spiders personally, despite the fact they won't hurt me.


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 10, 2020)

Reckon some of those badges are a little bit off, mind.


----------



## Raheem (Aug 10, 2020)

spitfire said:


> Fascists.


Fashly Madison.


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Reckon some of those badges are a little bit off, mind.


Let me know which


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Let me know which



1, 3 & 7-9


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> 1, 3 & 7-9


Cheers for that


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Cheers for that



Maybe you could stick a mask over the offending badgers?


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Maybe you could stick a mask over the offending badgers?


Don't violatie my rights  

Free the mouth and chin


----------



## petee (Aug 10, 2020)

what's the story with holding a fish?


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Don't violatie my rights
> 
> Free the mouth and chin



Sorry, meant "badges", not "badgers"


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

petee said:


> what's the story with holding a fish?


A lot of older white gentlemen who read the Daily Mail like to avoid their wives and homes by sticking sharp hooks in fishes mouths while drinking heavily.


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 10, 2020)

petee said:


> what's the story with holding a fish?



It's a stereotype. Like the NRA type out hunting grizzly bears, liberals or whatever it is they hunt.


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Sorry, meant "badges", not "badgers"


I am not withdrawing 7 or 9


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> It's a stereotype. Like the NRA type out hunting grizzly bears, liberals or whatever it is they hunt.


This sort of thing? 

Environmentalists' fury at Farage for dumping dead fish in Thames


----------



## petee (Aug 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


> A lot of older white gentlemen who read the Daily Mail like to avoid their wives and homes by sticking sharp hooks in fishes mouths while drinking heavily.



ah.
we have ice fishing for that. or minnesotans do, anyway.


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

petee said:


> ah.
> we have ice fishing for that. pr minnesotans do, anyway.


Look how happy he is


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 10, 2020)

Badgers said:


> I am not withdrawing 7 or 9



7 is dodgy because it plays to the Tory voters are thick stereotype.

Uneasy about 9. Admittedly, I do have a mate in his early 60s who does fish, read The Sun and has a lot to say about immigrants, "puffs" and other talking points of a certain demographic.


----------



## Badgers (Aug 10, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> 7 is dodgy because it plays to the Tory voters are thick stereotype.
> 
> Uneasy about 9. Admittedly, I do have a mate in his early 60s who does fish, read The Sun and has a lot to say about immigrants, "puffs" and other talking points of a certain demographic.


So. Number 9 is solid and staying in  good start. 

I appreciate the 'thick' on number 7 should have read 'selfish' but I stand by the rest so it stays


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 10, 2020)

petee said:


> ah.
> we have ice fishing for that. or minnesotans do, anyway.


Isn't that a bit risky?  Unless he's attached to the shore by a rope he could drift off and drown once the ice melts.   

And I hope he isn't chucking the empty bottles into the water.


----------



## petee (Aug 10, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Isn't that a bit risky?  Unless he's attached to the shore by a rope he could drift off and drown once the ice melts.
> 
> And I hope he isn't chucking the empty bottles into the water.



tbh it doesn't even look like he's ice fishing.
more of it.





I'll assume their friends will pick them up when called


----------



## Yossarian (Aug 10, 2020)




----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 10, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 11, 2020)

Morning DragCorp


----------



## Numbers (Aug 11, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Morning DragCorp


I only done 1 job y/day which took about 30 seconds, rest of the day was just sticky and sweating.  I have work to do but pah!

Prob’ be the same today, meh!


----------



## Hyperdark (Aug 11, 2020)




----------



## editor (Aug 11, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Aug 11, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 12, 2020)




----------



## Espresso (Aug 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 13, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 14, 2020)

Track & Trace app now live.


----------



## sideboob (Aug 16, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Aug 16, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 226380




They did.









						It’s incorrect to say there was no resistance to safety measures around the Blitz - Full Fact
					

There are multiple examples of people failing to follow Blitz guidance.




					fullfact.org


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 16, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Aug 16, 2020)

sideboob said:


> View attachment 226780


Oh dear. My first thought was what's he doing with that meat, not wtf has he got on his head. Took me a good while to notice


----------



## JimW (Aug 17, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 17, 2020)

This one seems to active today on facebook


----------



## existentialist (Aug 17, 2020)

spring-peeper said:


> This one seems to active today on facebook
> 
> View attachment 226986


Fuck me, that's out of the ballpark.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Aug 17, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Aug 18, 2020)




----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 18, 2020)

JimW said:


>



Thought they sounded less enthusiastic this year.


----------



## 8ball (Aug 18, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


>



... and a third holiday home for the billionaire that lent investment capital to the small business.


----------



## 8ball (Aug 18, 2020)

FridgeMagnet said:


> View attachment 226988


----------



## Roadkill (Aug 18, 2020)

Cold War Steve on fine form.



[edit: I can't get the bloody image to embed, so have the Tweet instead]

Expressing what a lot of us dream of, I suspect.  I'd certainly love to see the bastards on trial.

I don't see Cilla in this one though.


----------



## Pickman's model (Aug 18, 2020)

Badgers said:


> I am not withdrawing 7 of 9


Not surprised


----------



## Pickman's model (Aug 18, 2020)

Roadkill said:


> Cold War Steve on fine form.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


cilla? Cilla black?

She's been dead for a lorra lorra time


----------



## Pickman's model (Aug 18, 2020)

Badgers said:


> This sort of thing?
> 
> Environmentalists' fury at Farage for dumping dead fish in Thames
> 
> View attachment 225887


Fury at fish for taking part in farage publicity stunt


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 18, 2020)




----------



## LDC (Aug 18, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 227017



I had a really apocalyptic shopping day that first week it was all going off early in the pandemic. I went for an early morning run in a deserted park near me as the sun was rising, then went to the supermarket on the way home. In there it was the height of the 'panic buying' thing, and loads of the shelves were empty, people were being a bit frantic, there was a good amount of mask wearing, and just to top it off some of the supermarket lights had gone off.

All felt very '28 Days Later'. When I got home there were a few reports knocking round of internet and phone services going down or having problems. I had a few hours of sitting at home thinking, "Hmmmm, is this how it all ends then?"


----------



## tony.c (Aug 18, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Aug 18, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 227017


This when you get some of those statue mime artists inserting themselves around the place and then moving all of a sudden.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 18, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Aug 18, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 19, 2020)




----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 19, 2020)

Roadkill said:


> Cold War Steve on fine form.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Tosh and Bob


----------



## Roadkill (Aug 19, 2020)

krtek a houby said:


> Tosh and Bob



And with BJ getting the Sergeant Cryer death-stare!


----------



## MrSki (Aug 19, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Aug 19, 2020)

Roadkill said:


> Cold War Steve on fine form.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Where's Harold?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 19, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Aug 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 227155


Given past tendencies it will be sending a SWAT team.


----------



## Aladdin (Aug 19, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Aug 19, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Aug 19, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 227017


Had to look tweeter up...lives in Orlando Florida,  retail experience round my way is much busier


----------



## MrSki (Aug 21, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 21, 2020)




----------



## Steel Icarus (Aug 21, 2020)

Had a student's dad unbidden start a conversation about "this stuff".

"I tell you it's man-made. It's the Chinese, invented and released this Colloravirus [sic]. They reckon that Notre Dame predicted it..."

Where to begin with this


----------



## Teaboy (Aug 21, 2020)

S☼I said:


> Where to begin with this



Obvs a second conversation and a covert recording device.  Do it for your pals on u75 we could do with cheering up.


----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 23, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Aug 23, 2020)

It was just as accurate in June too



quimcunx said:


> View attachment 218083


----------



## two sheds (Aug 23, 2020)

do they not update these graphs?


----------



## kabbes (Aug 23, 2020)

two sheds said:


> do they not update these graphs?


They do.  This was the earlier version from April




farmerbarleymow said:


> View attachment 205617


----------



## MrSki (Aug 23, 2020)

kabbes said:


> It was just as accurate in June too


  If you want to go back through the 140 pages there are many duplicates, triplicates & I would expect the odd quadruplicate too. Sorry but I could not be bothered.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 23, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Aug 23, 2020)

MrSki said:


> If you want to go back through the 140 pages there are many duplicates, triplicates & I would expect the odd quadruplicate too. Sorry but I could not be bothered.


No, it’s fine.  You carry on and I’ll do the work for you


----------



## Epona (Aug 23, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 227592



To be fair, being plunged into sub-zero waters if you hadn't made it onto a life-boat your life expectancy was very short regardless of whether you were wearing a life vest - wearing one just made it easier to retrieve your corpse.  Very few people were pulled out of the water still alive.  Not a great analogy.


----------



## 8ball (Aug 24, 2020)

Epona said:


> To be fair, being plunged into sub-zero waters if you hadn't made it onto a life-boat your life expectancy was very short regardless of whether you were wearing a life vest - wearing one just made it easier to retrieve your corpse.  Very few people were pulled out of the water still alive.  Not a great analogy.



Please don't question the memes.


----------



## Epona (Aug 24, 2020)

8ball said:


> Please don't question the memes.



Aye aye Captain...


----------



## A380 (Aug 24, 2020)

Epona said:


> To be fair, being plunged into sub-zero waters if you hadn't made it onto a life-boat your life expectancy was very short regardless of whether you were wearing a life vest - wearing one just made it easier to retrieve your corpse.  Very few people were pulled out of the water still alive.  Not a great analogy.



Specially if your so called girlfriend took up a whole door for herself that could easily have taken two People whilst making you stay in the 4 degree water till you died and then, only when she saw you sink, start blowing her whistle to get rescued in like 30 seconds...


----------



## Epona (Aug 24, 2020)

A380 said:


> Specially if your so called girlfriend took up a whole door for herself that could easily have taken two People whilst making you stay in the 4 degree water till you died and then, only when she saw you sink, start blowing her whistle to get rescued in like 30 seconds...



You do know that some parts of that film are fictional for the sake of dramatisation, right? 

(BTW not complaining about it, there are 2 good films about the Titanic and that is one of them, the rest are terrible).


----------



## 8ball (Aug 24, 2020)

A380 said:


> Specially if your so called girlfriend took up a whole door for herself that could easily have taken two People whilst making you stay in the 4 degree water till you died and then, only when she saw you sink, start blowing her whistle to get rescued in like 30 seconds...



Oh, and now we're questioning James Cameron.


----------



## A380 (Aug 24, 2020)

8ball said:


> Oh, and now we're questioning James Cameron.



Paint me like one of your French girls 8ball ...


----------



## 8ball (Aug 24, 2020)

A380 said:


> Paint me like one of your French girls 8ball ...



Well, you'll end up with two eyes on one side of your head, but I hear that's a mark of artistic genius these days.


----------



## Epona (Aug 24, 2020)

8ball said:


> Well, you'll end up with two eyes on one side of your head, but I hear that's a mark of artistic genius these days.



Like Peppa Pig??


----------



## 8ball (Aug 24, 2020)

Epona said:


> Like Peppa Pig??



EXACTLY like Peppa Pig.


----------



## Epona (Aug 24, 2020)

8ball said:


> EXACTLY like Peppa Pig.



Peppa Pig like one of your French girls probably falls under rule 34...


----------



## MrSki (Aug 24, 2020)




----------



## 8ball (Aug 24, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


----------



## Mation (Aug 24, 2020)

8ball said:


> View attachment 227652


A medical crowbar


----------



## petee (Aug 24, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Aug 25, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 25, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Aug 25, 2020)




----------



## petee (Aug 26, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Aug 26, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 27, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 28, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 31, 2020)

Same theme as the one posted above by cupid_stunt


----------



## dessiato (Sep 1, 2020)

9


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 1, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 2287899



We need the facepalm smiley


----------



## MrSki (Sep 1, 2020)

dessiato said:


> View attachment 2287899


 Is this in the right thread? Is it Covid related?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 1, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Is this in the right thread? Is it Covid related?


Yeah, I think it was those fuckwits in Trafalgar square the other day banging on about masks and vaccines and stuff.


----------



## A380 (Sep 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 2, 2020)

Canada, I guess.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 3, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Sep 3, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 4, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Sep 4, 2020)

pitbulls them libdems


----------



## killer b (Sep 4, 2020)

_it is currently illegal to meeting in gathering of over 30_

don't they get someone in the office to proof this shit before they screengrab it for twitter?


----------



## two sheds (Sep 4, 2020)

it's a gerund


----------



## kabbes (Sep 4, 2020)

killer b said:


> _it is currently illegal to meeting in gathering of over 30_
> 
> don't they get someone in the office to proof this shit before they screengrab it for twitter?


they used up all their MPs as signatories


----------



## MrSki (Sep 4, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 4, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Sep 5, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Sep 5, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Sep 5, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 5, 2020)

Epona said:


> To be fair, being plunged into sub-zero waters if you hadn't made it onto a life-boat your life expectancy was very short regardless of whether you were wearing a life vest - wearing one just made it easier to retrieve your corpse.  Very few people were pulled out of the water still alive.  Not a great analogy.



You wouldn’t plunge into sub-zero waters, you’d bounce off the surface at that temperature*.

and I used to think this place was pretty sharp at pedantry...

*assuming normal atmospheric pressure.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 5, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


> You wouldn’t plunge into sub-zero waters, you’d bounce off the surface at that temperature*.
> 
> and I used to think this place was pretty sharp at pedantry...
> 
> *assuming normal atmospheric pressure.


You're forgetting salinity.


----------



## Epona (Sep 5, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


> You wouldn’t plunge into sub-zero waters, you’d bounce off the surface at that temperature*.
> 
> and I used to think this place was pretty sharp at pedantry...
> 
> *assuming normal atmospheric pressure.



There weren't any folks bouncing off the sea when the Titanic went down - pedantry fail.


----------



## 2hats (Sep 5, 2020)

Sea water typically freezes at -2C.


----------



## Raheem (Sep 5, 2020)

Epona said:


> There weren't any folks bouncing off the sea when the Titanic went down - pedantry fail.


Think you may have scored a point-missing success there.


----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 5, 2020)

existentialist said:


> You're forgetting salinity.



doh!


----------



## Raheem (Sep 5, 2020)

existentialist said:


> You're forgetting salinity.


I'm starting to question my salinity, to be honest.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 6, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 7, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 8, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Sep 8, 2020)

LBC getting things right, for once...


----------



## MrSki (Sep 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 8, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Sep 8, 2020)

This photo has sparked argument and controversy here. 

People are up in arms angry that the man has to do this. 
People saying its the saddest photo because he cant sit there for hours. 
I think the gentleman is an absolute hero!! He is respecting everyone's safety. And his own. And he brought his alarm clock so he would know when his hour for lunch was up. 
Needless to say there are people saying how awful this is and giving out about mask wearing and the chipping away at freedom. But this gentleman is showing how things should be done. Fair play to him.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 8, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


Well, that's at least something - an acknowledgement that Doris doesn't "know anything about the pathology of #Covid19". Perhaps there are some scientific advisers he could consult, or something...?


----------



## editor (Sep 8, 2020)

Well, this is embarrassing









						Religious leader who blamed gay marriage for coronavirus now has coronavirus
					

He said in a TV interview that the outbreak was ‘God's punishment for the sins of men.'




					metro.co.uk


----------



## ddraig (Sep 8, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Sep 8, 2020)

ddraig said:


> View attachment 229604


The oil can of Amontillado


----------



## mx wcfc (Sep 8, 2020)

FFS   









						Bootle Covid-19 hoax-claim salon to be visited by police
					

The Merseyside salon said masks were not worn by staff as "you can't catch what doesn't exist".



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## Aladdin (Sep 8, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> FFS
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Fucking morons


----------



## two sheds (Sep 8, 2020)

"Covid free salon"

twats


----------



## frogwoman (Sep 8, 2020)

Sure SARS-COV-2 will be pleased to find it doesn't exist, especially if the salon becomes crowded


----------



## existentialist (Sep 8, 2020)

two sheds said:


> "Covid free salon"
> 
> twats


Just tell me they're not dangling crystals in the window or similar nonsense...?


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 8, 2020)

The sign says "Covid talk is banned" but I suspect the proprietors might in fact have one or two opinions to share with anybody foolish enough to go in there.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 8, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> The sign says "Covid talk is banned" but I suspect the proprietors might in fact have one or two opinions to share with anybody foolish enough to go in there.


The allure of denial.


----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 9, 2020)

There’s a fair few FOTLer types knocking around Merseyside, wouldn’t surprise me if there was a link to Covid denialists.  Berks.


----------



## editor (Sep 9, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 9, 2020)




----------



## nogojones (Sep 9, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Sep 9, 2020)

I dont have time to do this properly but.....


Remember the rule of 6.


----------



## Mation (Sep 10, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Sep 10, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Sep 10, 2020)

nogojones said:


> View attachment 229753


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 10, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 10, 2020)

Oh, FFS.   






> Recently, a particular type of mask has been going viral on Facebook for its _interesting_ design. The face mask is netted, which means there are holes all over the surface of the mask. While that kind of defeats the purpose of having a face mask on in the first place, there’s been a surge of positive reviews by Americans who seem to find the product useful.
> 
> Many reviewers said the mask was breathable and comfortable… which would be great _if the mask actually covered your face_.
> 
> One of the reviews outrageously claimed that wearing a mask is not about health but compliance: “It’s cool and I can breathe. No one says a thing, which just goes to show that it’s not about your health it’s solely about your compliance.” Another reviewer agreed and said that the mask “lets me follow mask mandates without really being compliant.”











						“This mask is genius!” Americans Are Going Crazy Over These Netted Masks With Holes In Them
					

Since the onslaught of the pandemic, many of us are required to wear face masks as a necessity instead of an accessory. But that doesn’t seem to be the case with those who live on the other side of the globe.   Recently, a particular type of mask has been going viral on Facebook for […]




					worldofbuzz.com


----------



## existentialist (Sep 10, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Oh, FFS.
> 
> View attachment 229837
> 
> ...


Some people just don't deserve to live. It's just such a shame they seem so intent on ensuring they take as many people with them as possible.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 10, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 11, 2020)




----------



## William of Walworth (Sep 11, 2020)

"Nutcakes"


----------



## belboid (Sep 11, 2020)

elbows said:


> I dont have time to do this properly but.....
> 
> 
> Remember the rule of 6.


I am a free! I am not man, a number.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 11, 2020)

Wear your fucking mask.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 12, 2020)




----------



## BristolEcho (Sep 12, 2020)

Sugar Kane said:


> This photo has sparked argument and controversy here.
> View attachment 229600View attachment 229601
> People are up in arms angry that the man has to do this.
> People saying its the saddest photo because he cant sit there for hours.
> ...



Were people angry because 105 minutes does not equal an hour?


----------



## Aladdin (Sep 12, 2020)

BristolEcho said:


> Were people angry because 105 minutes does not equal an hour?



Over here the regulations are that restaurants and pubs provide for a meal and alcohol for a sitting of 105 mins. However if social distancing of over 2m can be maintained the customer can stay longer.
105 mins is an hour and 45 mins.
It turns out that the elderly gentleman has responded to the photo. He said he brings his clock everywhere with him because he doesnt have a watch and he brought it to the pub ao that he could keep an eye on the time because he wanted to be home to watch the 6 o clock news.

People were assuming a lot from the photo and undoubtedly  making more of it than was true.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 12, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Sep 12, 2020)

A mask and a snack all in one


----------



## quiet guy (Sep 12, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Wear your fucking mask.



The first Covid marshal in action


----------



## A380 (Sep 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 230024


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 12, 2020)

Sound NSFW or young kids.

View attachment 1c.mp4


----------



## dessiato (Sep 12, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Sep 12, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Sep 12, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 13, 2020)

gosub said:


>




made some yesterday...



It was delicious


----------



## MrSki (Sep 13, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 230126


All very well but was not one a dog?


----------



## fishfinger (Sep 13, 2020)

MrSki said:


> All very well but was not one a dog?


You're thinking of the Famous Five.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 13, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> You're thinking of the Famous Five.


Well you could be right. I never read any secret seven.


----------



## dessiato (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Sep 13, 2020)

Thought better of post...


----------



## editor (Sep 13, 2020)

This is pretty special


----------



## editor (Sep 13, 2020)

Sleazy creep of the day












						Bar worker 'messaged model after getting number from Test and Trace'
					

Lucy Dixon, 32, accused him of breaching data protection regulations for taking her her number.




					metro.co.uk


----------



## existentialist (Sep 13, 2020)

editor said:


> Sleazy creep of the day
> 
> View attachment 230185
> 
> ...


Good. I hope he's hung out to dry, pour décourager les âutres.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 13, 2020)




----------



## MickiQ (Sep 13, 2020)

editor said:


> Sleazy creep of the day
> 
> View attachment 230185
> 
> ...


That is seriously creepy, since he is unlikely to have known which phone number on the list was her, he presumably must have used social media to  trawl through all the female names on the list until he found a picture of the girl he was looking for.
There's loads of things that are worrying about this, Apart from the fact that a lot of young women are going to read this and not feel safe (OK this guy backed down but others might not), it will also encourage them to give false contact details if they come out at all. The book (preferably a large heavy one) needs throwing at this asshole.


----------



## Orang Utan (Sep 13, 2020)

MickiQ said:


> That is seriously creepy, since he is unlikely to have known which phone number on the list was her, he presumably must have used social media to  trawl through all the female names on the list until he found a picture of the girl he was looking for.


He probably found out her name, so it would have been easy just to look at the list


----------



## belboid (Sep 13, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> He probably found out her name, so it would have been easy just to look at the list


Or just saw her writing it down.  Either way it is seriously shit behaviour and he’ll be lucky to keep his job.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Sep 13, 2020)

belboid said:


> Or just saw her writing it down.  Either way it is seriously shit behaviour and he’ll be lucky to keep his job.


This strikes me as an inadequate set of consequences for abusing a medically-required procedure for the purposes of sexual harassment.


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 13, 2020)

He shouldn't just lose his job, he should be prosecuted as well. Whilst this young lady clearly feels more annoyed that worried by this, Tom has undermined the public's already shaky faith in Track and Trace. Since he isn't a Downing St special advisor one would hope action is taken against him.


----------



## belboid (Sep 13, 2020)

The company is responsible for proper implementation of gdpr, not the individual.  And I’d want to know a little more about this workers’ previous behaviour and treatment of customers at work before just going ‘hang him’.  It is clearly unacceptable behaviour, within the realms of gross misconduct, but the major problem is with such an obviously exploitable system.  Just all reeks a bit of blaming individuals for systemic failures.


----------



## editor (Sep 13, 2020)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 230260


But I keep asking: what is supposed to happen when we're 'biochemically connected.' What are the incredible gains to be had for such a monumentally expensive campaign of global deceit?


----------



## 8ball (Sep 13, 2020)

editor said:


> But I keep asking: what is supposed to happen when we're 'biochemically connected.' What are the incredible gains to be had for such a monumentally expensive campaign of global deceit?



I'm quite looking forward to being able to get 5G internet straight into my brain.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Sep 13, 2020)

editor said:


> But I keep asking: what is supposed to happen when we're 'biochemically connected.' What are the incredible gains to be had for such a monumentally expensive campaign of global deceit?



Worker Bee's Compliant Only to The System.


----------



## editor (Sep 13, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> Worker Bee's Compliant Only to The System.


Capitalism already does a pretty good job of that.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 13, 2020)

8ball said:


> I'm quite looking forward to being able to get 5G internet straight into my brain.


Wait until you see the bill.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Sep 14, 2020)

posted about 2355 Sunday on teh tweeter


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Sep 14, 2020)

Amendments at:



			https://www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/2020/986/pdfs/uksi_20200986_en.pdf
		


Honestly though who gives a toss what the law says any more.


----------



## 8ball (Sep 14, 2020)

FridgeMagnet said:


> Honestly though who gives a toss what they say any more.



This is going to be a problem over the next few months.


----------



## Mation (Sep 14, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Wait until you see the bill.


5 minutes before it comes into effect


----------



## MrSki (Sep 14, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 14, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 14, 2020)

One for spring-peeper.


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 14, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 230355


We're definitely through the Looking Glass when Jedward are the voice of sanity


----------



## T & P (Sep 14, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 14, 2020)




----------



## Epona (Sep 14, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 230410



Fuck me, that does about sum it up, doesn't it?


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Sep 14, 2020)

Epona said:


> Fuck me, that does about sum it up, doesn't it?


The red sky wins it. Though the Korean team who filled their stadium with love dolls* probably wins a different style of apocalypse award



			https://preview.redd.it/q5gtngvcfjz41.png?width=794&format=png&auto=webp&s=74a2dfdfa042ad4e1b401e86e58dc766cba2d271
		


*They claim to have just put out an order for mannequins and didn't realise what they were


----------



## two sheds (Sep 14, 2020)

The one with Hitler and Shipman takes some beating 





__





						Anger at NRL after pictures of Hitler and Shipman appear in 'crowd'
					





					www.msn.com


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 15, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Sep 15, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 230428



Regardless of covid that's a pretty cool restaurant and I'd eat there anyway.  I can't imagine its great for the front of house staff.  Getting up and down those steps with plates in hand.


----------



## skyscraper101 (Sep 15, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 230355



If someone had told me a decade ago that in the year 2020, those annoying twins off X Factor would be the voice of reason against Ian Brown of the Stone Roses. I probably would've asked if I could have whatever they were smoking.


----------



## Orang Utan (Sep 15, 2020)

Teaboy said:


> Regardless of covid that's a pretty cool restaurant and I'd eat there anyway.  I can't imagine its great for the front of house staff.  Getting up and down those steps with plates in hand.


Not so great for people with disabilities either


----------



## editor (Sep 15, 2020)




----------



## skyscraper101 (Sep 15, 2020)

Seems Noel Gallagher is with Ian Brown on the masks thing









						Noel Gallagher refuses to wear face masks: "There's too many fucking liberties being taken away"
					

Noel Gallagher has said he refuses to wear a face mask while shopping, in defiance of laws which were introduced earlier this year.




					www.nme.com


----------



## Badgers (Sep 15, 2020)

skyscraper101 said:


> Seems Noel Gallagher is with Ian Brown on the masks thing
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Well known cunt acts like a cunt shocker


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 15, 2020)

skyscraper101 said:


> Seems Noel Gallagher is with Ian Brown on the masks thing
> 
> 
> 
> ...


They  should means test the fine and fine the fuck out of rich selfish bastards like that.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 15, 2020)

remember when the tories (yes, double take, the tories) introduced means tested fines for things like speeding fines, and the arsehole magistrates fined some rich fuckers huge amounts which put the whole system into disrepute and they scrapped it.

Now I'll swear I remember this from ooo 40 years ago. I'm sort of thinking I dreamed it but I'll swear it happened.


----------



## LDC (Sep 15, 2020)

skyscraper101 said:


> Seems Noel Gallagher is with Ian Brown on the masks thing
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Pair of thick entitled cunts.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 15, 2020)

two sheds said:


> remember when the tories (yes, double take, the tories) introduced means tested fines for things like speeding fines, and the arsehole magistrates fined some rich fuckers huge amounts which put the whole system into disrepute and they scrapped it.
> 
> Now I'll swear I remember this from ooo 40 years ago. I'm sort of thinking I dreamed it but I'll swear it happened.


I think by 'disrepute' you mean rich tory donors kicked off and the government did a u-turn.  Fines are for plebs after all.


----------



## Raheem (Sep 15, 2020)

Brown was always a knobhead conspiracy theory fan. In the 90s, it was Nazism being caused by them all being gay and therefore psychologically flawed. Or something like that.


----------



## wayward bob (Sep 15, 2020)

skyscraper101 said:


> Seems Noel Gallagher is with Ian Brown on the masks thing


it's almost like we could have got a heads up from the morrissey timeline


----------



## Raheem (Sep 15, 2020)

wayward bob said:


> it's almost like we could have got a heads up from the morrissey timeline


Maybe someone set fire to some polystyrene in the Hacienda in 1984.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 15, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I think by 'disrepute' you mean rich tory donors kicked off and the government did a u-turn.  Fines are for plebs after all.



Ha!!!





__





						How means-tested justice will affect you
					






					www.telegraph.co.uk
				






> [When an attempt was made in the late Eighties to match income directly to financial penalties - the so-called unit fines scheme - it was a disaster.
> 
> It was scrapped in 1993 amid protests at the anomalies it produced. An offender's income was broken into units and then multiplied to establish the level of fine, which could reach spectacular levels. One man was fined £1,200 for dropping a crisp packet and two neighbours were fined £75 and £1,500 for driving without insurance.



Yep just as I recall fucking tory magistrates made sure it was scrapped.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 15, 2020)




----------



## nogojones (Sep 15, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Sep 16, 2020)

How to test yourself for Coronavirus:

Step1: Pour yourself a glass of wine and try to smell it.
Step 2: If you can smell it then take a sip to see if you can taste it.
Step 3: If you can smell and taste it, then you can confirm that you don't have Coronavirus.

I did this nine times last night just to be sure and each time it came out that I was negative for Coronavirus. Today, however, I'm feeling a little bit under the weather so I think I'll have have to take the test again.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 16, 2020)




----------



## MickiQ (Sep 16, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> How to test yourself to Coronavirus:
> 
> Step1: Pour yourself a glass of wine and try to smell it.
> Step 2: If you can smell it then take a sip to see if you can taste it.
> ...


You're a genius does it have to be wine or will it work with any form of alcohol?


----------



## MrSki (Sep 16, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 16, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 16, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Sep 17, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Well known cunt acts like a cunt shocker



I don't know why the attitudes of a couple of knobheads who had some hits 30 years ago are even being reported on - in the 1918 flu pandemic, did newspapers speak to a lot of 1880s music hall acts who thought it was all a load of hooey?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## sideboob (Sep 17, 2020)

Some moron has started selling "Corona is a lie" badges in Japan now.


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## Buddy Bradley (Sep 17, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


Suspect that could be the root of Noel Gallagher's views as well.


----------



## gentlegreen (Sep 17, 2020)

Came home to find a batshit leaflet that I have only skimmed ... it has anti-Catholic stuff in ...
Sadly my security camera didn't capture the deliverer of this important information and I can't find it online so I scanned some of it and OCR'd a nugget ...
Unusually, no contact details ...





> JESUIT TRAINED OFFICIALS, have given us masks to wear - a symbol of slavery; a lockdown' which is contrary to our Health, and poison in the form of vaccines which are harmful to our bodies. God designed our body and knows what is best for it. We need good sleep, lots of fresh air, clean water and exercise, which stimulates mind and body; fruits, herbs, nuts, grains, seeds and vegetables, to boost our immune system and keep us in good health. Anything contrary to that will make us prone to disease.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 17, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Came home to find a batshit leaflet that I have only skimmed ... it has anti-Catholic stuff in ...
> Sadly my security camera didn't capture the deliverer of this important information and I can't find it online so I scanned some of it and OCR'd a nugget ...
> Unusually, no contact details ...
> 
> View attachment 230725


Distress manifests itself in many curious ways...


----------



## gentlegreen (Sep 17, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Distress manifests itself in many curious ways...


Especially if your philosophy is constrained by indoctrination ...
I sometime wish my life's main concern was as simple as being worried about "Catholics"... (not really  )

I struggle to imagine what it must be like to have no understanding of the simplest things in life - like what happens when you flick a light switch ...


----------



## existentialist (Sep 17, 2020)

gentlegreen said:


> Especially if your philosophy is constrained by indoctrination ...
> I sometime wish my life's main concern was as simple as being worried about "Catholics"... (not really  )
> 
> I struggle to imagine what it must be like to have no understanding of the simplest things in life - like what happens when you flick a light switch ...


Once you have it, it is hard to imagine life without it. 

Mind you, they probably say exactly the same thing...


----------



## gentlegreen (Sep 17, 2020)

At least one of the quotes in that leaflet came from here ;-









						Amazing Word Ministries
					

Amazing Word Ministries, Bonners Ferry, Idaho. 6,941 likes · 521 talking about this · 5 were here. The Word of God, who came down from heaven in the form of a Man, Jesus Christ, is waiting with...




					www.facebook.com
				




It's so unusual to get a leaflet like that without being directed to the JWs or somesuch ...


----------



## gentlegreen (Sep 17, 2020)

I just learned a new verb ...



> The plandemic is thought out to the very end...and they will be *wroth* with the remnants and they who will be *wroth* are most of these protesters



... or rather they've verbed an adjective ...

wroth
/rəʊθ,rɒθ/

adjective archaic
adjective: wroth

    angry.
    "Sir Leicester is majestically wroth"


----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 17, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Sep 17, 2020)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 230743


I wonder whether her family agrees?


----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 17, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I wonder whether her family agrees?




There were a lot of comments suggesting Child Services take her children away from her.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 17, 2020)

spring-peeper said:


> There were a lot of comments suggesting Child Services take her children away from her.


If only it were always that easy.


----------



## Orang Utan (Sep 17, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 230715


These guys though, what are they thinking?


----------



## cybershot (Sep 17, 2020)

Apologies if already posted. Not checking the thread as regular as I used too.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 18, 2020)




----------



## Epona (Sep 18, 2020)

Oh for crying out loud, let's actually not pretend that this ^ didn't happen and that it actually didn't have a basis for people being nervous - people died in the Tube tunnels and bomb shelters, it wasn't safety.  (Look up stuff like what happened at Bethnal Green etc).

I don't think this sort of thing is a good and rational counter argument to anti-maskers and anti-Covid conspiraloons.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 18, 2020)

tbf this thread isn’t a rational counter argument, it’s a piss take.


----------



## Badgers (Sep 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 18, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 18, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 18, 2020)

The sound of stupidity


----------



## two sheds (Sep 18, 2020)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 230787



True that - I don't know _anyone_ who's died in those fires.


----------



## quimcunx (Sep 18, 2020)

two sheds said:


> True that - I don't know _anyone_ who's died in those fires.



Nor me.  Coincidence?  I don't think so.


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 18, 2020)

two sheds said:


> True that - I don't know _anyone_ who's died in those fires.



And they've been inflating the numbers by claiming that people were killed by fire when many of them actually died from smoke inhalation. #Confire #Planferno


----------



## A380 (Sep 18, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I wonder whether her family agrees?


I might if I was related to such stupidity...


----------



## nogojones (Sep 18, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


----------



## brogdale (Sep 18, 2020)

This is where we really are; when laughing hanCOCK looks like this...things ain't good...


----------



## Lord Camomile (Sep 18, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 230355


It feels like we've got to the point where all but a few don't trust the government, they just disagree on exactly what lies are being told in aid of what outcomes.


----------



## crossthebreeze (Sep 18, 2020)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 230787


----------



## two sheds (Sep 18, 2020)

"... but the fires KNOW when to stop at the border ..." 

"yes, that's a US database map that you're looking at"


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Sep 18, 2020)

There are more London anti-mask protests tomorrow and next Saturday too, but I suspect they'll be a lot smaller than the last one. I've seen the normal trajectory on Twitter - infighting between the "stars" and also folk saying "wait David Icke was there plus some woman saying the NWO were putting metals into our blood so they could remote control us, and all these people obsessed with paedos, I just thought masks were bullshit, this isn't what I came for". There's already argument as to whether you should go to the demo on the 19th or the 26th because one is promoted by zzzzzzzz.

Interesting comparison to the FLA demos which also initially had an unexpectedly huge turnout (huger than this) which almost entirely disappeared when it became obvious that it was owned by a small group of weirdos.


----------



## SlideshowBob (Sep 18, 2020)

The anti-mask protests in particular are so fucking bizarre and weird.

Opposition to lockdown measures may be misplaced but there's at least a very tangible and understandable reason as to why some people really don't want to be locked inside for months on end. But wearing a mask in public settings at the moment is at most a minor irritation, one you should be able to get over almost immediately when it becomes clear it's an obvious way to mitigate the worst effects of the virus spreading in settings such as supermarkets.

Yes, it might be a bit annoying that the government are telling you what to do, but then the government tell you what to do in many aspects of your life every day: not being able to drive when you're ten pints deep without breaking the law may be a form of government encroachment, but it's also clearly sensible policy because driving while you're pissed is dangerous and likely to harm others.


----------



## danski (Sep 18, 2020)

SlideshowBob said:


> The anti-mask protests in particular are so fucking bizarre and weird.
> 
> Opposition to lockdown measures may be misplaced but there's at least a very tangible and understandable reason as to why some people really don't want to be locked inside for months on end. But wearing a mask in public settings at the moment is at most a minor irritation, one you should be able to get over almost immediately when it becomes clear it's an obvious way to mitigate the worst effects of the virus spreading in settings such as supermarkets.
> 
> Yes, it might be a bit annoying that the government are telling you what to do, but then the government tell you what to do in many aspects of your life every day: not being able to drive when you're ten pints deep without breaking the law may be a form of government encroachment, but it's also clearly sensible policy because driving while you're pissed is dangerous and likely to harm others.


Just clear off with your bloody common sense. We don't need that sort of thing here.


----------



## Orang Utan (Sep 18, 2020)

My sister seems to be going the covidiot way but she's being coy about it as she knows how the rest of the family will react. Dunno what to do or say, but it's the 5G/plandemic rather than anti-mask/covidisn'treal route - it never goes well when i pull her up on the shit she comes out with


----------



## MrSki (Sep 18, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Sep 18, 2020)

Pinched from Facebook:
They whole of the UK could be tested by midnight if they let an Aldi checkout operator run the drive through screening.


----------



## A380 (Sep 18, 2020)

Documentary of my life ...


----------



## ddraig (Sep 18, 2020)

Cant believe this not been posted yet!


----------



## two sheds (Sep 18, 2020)

You're right not to believe that 

Class poster-type-thing though


----------



## ddraig (Sep 18, 2020)

two sheds said:


> You're right not to believe that
> 
> Class poster-type-thing though


Did look at last few pages


----------



## two sheds (Sep 18, 2020)

May not even be this thread


----------



## MrSki (Sep 18, 2020)

ddraig said:


> Cant believe this not been posted yet!View attachment 230860


editor posted it in the last page or two. It is not butter either.   

ETA I owe you an apology. Must have been on the Bandwidthz thread.


----------



## ddraig (Sep 18, 2020)

Can't see where it's been posted!


----------



## MrSki (Sep 19, 2020)

ddraig said:


> Can't see where it's been posted!


As I said above it was on the Bandwidthz thread so I apologise for accusing you of a pea roast. Mind you it is worth being on both threads.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 19, 2020)




----------



## HalloweenJack (Sep 19, 2020)

2nd wave campaign poster.
Enjoy


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Sep 19, 2020)

HalloweenJack said:


> 2nd wave campaign poster.
> Enjoy


You have to wonder whether people actually look at these things after they make them, or even while they're making them.


----------



## Badgers (Sep 19, 2020)

__





						The Pandemmys - The Daily Show
					

The Pandemmy Awards, presented by The Daily Show.




					www.pandemmyawards.com


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 19, 2020)

If you're someone that can't wear a mask this thread is a right shitefest now. 

I'd really, really love not to have the panic disorder that makes it fucking horrible. (and I did try for a few weeks) 

I'm also someone that has a pretty thick skin usually but this has really got to me.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 19, 2020)

Everyone on here realizes that's not the problem though lizzie, it's people who can wear them but won't.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 19, 2020)




----------



## magneze (Sep 19, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 20, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Sep 20, 2020)

Updated classics


----------



## sideboob (Sep 20, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> If you're someone that can't wear a mask this thread is a right shitefest now.
> 
> I'd really, really love not to have the panic disorder that makes it fucking horrible. (and I did try for a few weeks)
> 
> I'm also someone that has a pretty thick skin usually but this has really got to me.


I was in the same situation as you.  I could never wear a mask without going into a coughing fit after a minute or two, and I have yet to hear of someone being exempt from wearing a mask over here in Japan.  Last year I did a spiro-breathing-metre-thing test and was diagnosed with copd and asthma with the lung function of a 94 year old male, despite only being 45 years old.   I was fucked when covid came along, because everyone in Japan was wearing a mask,  yet I was physically unable to.  What I (my wife) did was make a number of masks out of material, starting out at almost mesh, and gradually building up to about the same as a cloth mask.  I slowely got used to wearing a mask, and am now able to go speed shopping, roughly 10 minutes, wearing a proper mask.  
Anyway, this is not a dig at you in any way, just my experience.
As a side note, I had a copd lung flare-up last week, and the irony of having to put on a mask, to see my pulmonologist because I could not breathe was not lost on me.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 20, 2020)




----------



## HalloweenJack (Sep 21, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Sep 21, 2020)

As if we hadn't suffered enough through 2020.


----------



## brogdale (Sep 21, 2020)

Uh oh...here we go...


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 21, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Everyone on here realizes that's not the problem though lizzie, it's people who can wear them but won't.



But when you're a person that can't and you are in an environment where mask wearing is the norm you know that everyone is looking at you thinking you're just one of those cunts.

I even wear a lanyard, people still presume you’re just one of them, I got shit from a cashier at a pharmacy the other day while wearing it.

I get what this thread is about but it'd be wonderful if the message that there are lots of people really struggling with masks was put out there more, not just this narrative that folk without them on are just Trump-type idiots.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 21, 2020)

Yes totally understand. I thought I wouldn't be able to wear one at first so was somewhat concerned. 

My neighbour has severe brittle asthma, went on the Lung Foundation UK website and printed out a card which she hangs round her neck now Should I wear a face covering? - British Lung Foundation 

She filled in the form with her name and why she can't wear a mask and they printed it out and sent it to her. 

It's good and clear, might be worth adding to the lanyard? .


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 21, 2020)

two sheds said:


> Yes totally understand. I thought I wouldn't be able to wear one at first so was somewhat concerned.
> 
> My neighbour has severe brittle asthma, went on the Lung Foundation UK website and printed out a card which she hangs round her neck now Should I wear a face covering? - British Lung Foundation
> 
> ...



I have the official government one now in a clip-on visitors badge type thing, you can turn it round for mean people as the government have included a snippy passive aggressive message on the back...


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 21, 2020)

Anyway, sorry to be a massive killjoy. As you were (ish)


----------



## two sheds (Sep 21, 2020)

Nah is important distinction, as I say my neighbour feels similar.


----------



## frogwoman (Sep 21, 2020)

Sorry to hear this lizzieloo. I don't know whether you could wear a visor or similar? Sorry if that seems massively patronising and you've probably already thought of it. I hope you find a solution soon x


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 22, 2020)

How to look like a right tit.


----------



## Badgers (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## skyscraper101 (Sep 22, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> I even wear a lanyard, people still presume you’re just one of them, I got shit from a cashier at a pharmacy the other day while wearing it.



That's bullshit. If you wear a lanyard specifically explaining your exemption then nobody should have the right to challenge you. There should be way more public education about this.

That said, should it be mandatory for all exempted people have to display or carry something to qualify exemption? My gut feeling is yes. And also a bit no because maybe I haven't considered everything here (disabilities etc).

But then how do you effectively police and fine the idiots who refuse to wear a face covering in shops/transport without medical reason unless they wear something to prove this? It seems like a fair compromise.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 22, 2020)

skyscraper101 said:


> That's bullshit. If you wear a lanyard specifically explaining your exemption then nobody should have the right to challenge you. There should be way more public education about this.
> 
> That said, should it be mandatory for all exempted people have to display or carry something to qualify exemption? My gut feeling is yes. And also a bit no because maybe I haven't considered everything here (disabilities etc).
> 
> But then how do you effectively police and fine the idiots who refuse to wear a face covering in shops/transport without medical reason unless they wear something to prove this? It seems like a fair compromise.


I suppose if the police were to fine someone with a medical exemption to wearing a mask, the individual could provide medical evidence although there is likely to be a cost to that as GPs charge for letters and stuff.  One way could be for the government to provide, via GPs perhaps, official letters verifying that the individuals are exempt.  But that sounds far too sensible with the current crop of idiots in charge.


----------



## skyscraper101 (Sep 22, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I suppose if the police were to fine someone with a medical exemption to wearing a mask, the individual could provide medical evidence although there is likely to be a cost to that as GPs charge for letters and stuff.  One way could be for the government to provide, via GPs perhaps, official letters verifying that the individuals are exempt.  But that sounds far too sensible with the current crop of idiots in charge.



Just something which puts the onus on individuals to qualify their reason for not wearing a face covering. Even if it's a simple download and print thing. As much for their benefit not to get harassed as anything else. It seems like a fair and not that complex way to ensure that the right people are fined/removed/refused service.

But yeah, then again...this government.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 22, 2020)

skyscraper101 said:


> Just something which puts the onus on individuals to qualify their reason for not wearing a face covering. Even if it's a simple download and print thing. As much for their benefit not to get harassed as anything else. It seems like a fair and not that complex way to ensure that the right people are fined/removed/refused service.
> 
> But yeah, then again...this government.



Said elsewhere but  Lung Foundation UK do a simple download and print for a card you can hang round your neck with your name and reason for not being able to wear a mask. Came next day I think my neighbour said.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Sep 22, 2020)

Although I can understand why people need exemption from mask wearing, and something to explain this, I worry about them having to have a badge or papers to mean they don’t get fined etc. I remember the stories Aunt Marta used to tell about being Jewish in Germany before the war and how the badge wearing started.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Sep 22, 2020)

skyscraper101 said:


> That's bullshit. If you wear a lanyard specifically explaining your exemption then nobody should have the right to challenge you. There should be way more public education about this.
> 
> That said, should it be mandatory for all exempted people have to display or carry something to qualify exemption? My gut feeling is yes. And also a bit no because maybe I haven't considered everything here (disabilities etc).
> 
> But then how do you effectively police and fine the idiots who refuse to wear a face covering in shops/transport without medical reason unless they wear something to prove this? It seems like a fair compromise.


We’re told to take people on face value if they say they are exempt. Not ideal, but better than making them wear a black triangle or to explain just exactly why they are exempt


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 22, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Sep 22, 2020)

ö


----------



## mx wcfc (Sep 22, 2020)

I didn't check the account this came from or the poster, so no idea whether it's a pisstake or a genuine conspiraloon.  I hope the former./



ETA - I've had a look now - it's a pisstake.


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 22, 2020)

That's the "Room Next Door" guy, so definitely a pisstake.


----------



## Epona (Sep 22, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> I didn't check the account this came from or the poster, so no idea whether it's a pisstake or a genuine conspiraloon.  I hope the former./
> 
> 
> 
> ETA - I've had a look now - it's a pisstake.



EDIT: Sorry, reading comprehension is poor today, it has been one of those days.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 22, 2020)

.


----------



## Epona (Sep 22, 2020)

two sheds said:


> i can understand the need to check - there are some batshit silly conspiracy theorists out there



I already edited, I misread the post, my fault entirely!  Was really hoping someone wouldn't uncover my own idiocy before I edited


----------



## two sheds (Sep 22, 2020)

edited if you want to delete, then I'll delete this one, then you can delete yours quoting this one, then  I can ...


----------



## Epona (Sep 23, 2020)

Nah no worries, not too bothered


----------



## A380 (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Sep 23, 2020)

Epona said:


> Nah no worries, not too bothered



you realize we could have gone into an infinite loop there - urban might not have survived


----------



## Badgers (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## Pickman's model (Sep 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



surely it's a briton's right to have sex with whoever they want, subject to consent, and indeed as david cameron insists with whatever you want


----------



## crossthebreeze (Sep 23, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



In North East England, partners who live apart and aren't in each others support bubble (ie because neither are the only adult in their household) were allowed to have sex (for the first time since 23rd March) for exactly 4 days from Monday to Thursday last week, before the local lockdown banned them from meeting in private, and advised against meeting up at all!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 23, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> surely it's a briton's right to have sex with whoever they want, subject to consent, and indeed as david cameron insists with whatever you want



Are you suggesting the pig consented?


----------



## Pickman's model (Sep 23, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Are you suggesting the pig consented?


Are you suggesting the pig was a person?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 23, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Are you suggesting the pig consented?


Don't think a dead pig can consent.


----------



## spitfire (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Sep 23, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> surely it's a briton's right to have sex with whoever they want, *subject to consent*


Check your PM's x


----------



## Pickman's model (Sep 23, 2020)

spitfire said:


>



Looks more like an Apache gunship to me


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Sep 23, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> Looks more like an Apache gunship to me


----------



## editor (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## zahir (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## tony.c (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 23, 2020)

T & P said:


> View attachment 231474


I've now got disturbing mental images of fuckwit PM shoving wotsits up his arse.


----------



## T & P (Sep 23, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I've now got disturbing mental images of fuckwit PM shoving wotsits up his arse.


I think he's more of a 'has intercourse with pasty' sort of fella...


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 23, 2020)

T & P said:


> I think he's more of a 'has intercourse with pasty' sort of fella...


You've probably put the entire country off pasties now.


----------



## editor (Sep 23, 2020)

It's moderately clever but not exactly side splitting stuff


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 23, 2020)

editor







The powers that be have obviously read this tweet & moved the kick off to 8pm. Hope there is not too much injury time.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 23, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Sep 23, 2020)

MrSki said:


> editor
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Is that actually so? A rare instance of the Man in Charge actually doing something right for a change.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 23, 2020)

T & P said:


> Is that actually so? A rare instance of the Man in Charge actually doing something right for a change.


According to 5Live yes. Maybe should have been 7.45 to be on the safe side.


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 23, 2020)

frogwoman said:


> Sorry to hear this lizzieloo. I don't know whether you could wear a visor or similar? Sorry if that seems massively patronising and you've probably already thought of it. I hope you find a solution soon x


Just ordered a visor, I hardly ever go out anyway but yeah, I reckon I can do that.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## alsoknownas (Sep 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



Ah, we're legal now then!  Was quite enjoying the _frisson _of illegal sex if I'm honest 💕.


----------



## danski (Sep 24, 2020)

Nicked from b3ta.com

*Covid turning up at the pub to find Boris shut it at 10
*


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 24, 2020)

Badgers said:


>




Surely it's legal, as long as a maximum of 6 people are involved?


----------



## two sheds (Sep 24, 2020)

and stay 2m apart at all times.


----------



## Zapp Brannigan (Sep 24, 2020)

two sheds said:


> and stay 2m apart at all times.



Is the 2m measured like the finishing line of a race, from the torso?  Or like the offside rule, where it's any part of the body you can score with?


----------



## MrSki (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## ddraig (Sep 24, 2020)

FFS


----------



## 2hats (Sep 24, 2020)

ddraig said:


> FFS


Someone, somewhere has a problem with basic maths and statistics. In England the latest figures clearly show <2 homicides per day (murder technically lower than that as that figure includes manslaughter). The stroke figures are over by almost two orders of magnitude and the heart attack mortality several factors too high. So it's not surprising they can't get to grasp with exponential growth.


----------



## Badgers (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## Lurdan (Sep 24, 2020)

2hats said:


> In England the latest figures clearly show <2 homicides per day


When I look at memes like that I can't help feeling we ought to be setting a more aspirational target.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## platinumsage (Sep 24, 2020)

.


----------



## editor (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Sep 24, 2020)

Cottaging and glory holes are now the safest form of casual sex it seems...


----------



## ddraig (Sep 24, 2020)

How low will conspiraloons go?!? Sticking an NHS and gov logo on loonery!!


----------



## gentlegreen (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Sep 24, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 24, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> View attachment 231668



March called. It wants its Memes back.


----------



## quimcunx (Sep 24, 2020)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> March called. It wants its Memes back.



Will it also take its bastard virus back? huh? Huh?


----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 24, 2020)

*Jeff Boris*

6tShopolnsoredel  · 
"WHY IS THE DEATH RATE ABOUT 75% LOWER IN MANY COUNTRIES?" asked Dr. Jane Orient, executive director of the Association of American Physicians.
The reference to a country-based analysis updated Sept. 20 that shows a gap between countries that treat COVID-19 early or prophylactically with hydroxychloroquine and those that, like the US, discourage or prohibit its use.
Some of the key lessons:





Flawed and even falsified studies were published and promoted by media outlets eager to discredit Trump, while positive studies were impugned or ignored.





HCQ is commonly prescribed for at least 25 indications in addition to malaria.





The drug's prolongation of the QT interval is in the mid-range of 30 commonly used drugs.





Hundreds of drugs have been approved without randomized controlled trials, including the tetanus vaccine, insulin, tetracycline, warfarin, heparin, prednisone, Keflex and high-dose penicillin for neurosyphilis.





Only 8.5% of the American Heart Association's guidelines are supported by randomized controlled trials.
COVID-19 is a treatable condition, not a killer virus.


----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 25, 2020)

The above and below are from my only trumpsoid that is still on my fb friends.


----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 25, 2020)

and for my Canadian friends, here is what is being circulated on facebook


----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 25, 2020)

I really should block him, but he has good jokes.

And, I really should see what the other side is being fed.


----------



## Novatt (Sep 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 25, 2020)

This was just on the BBC news, woman goes mad after being asked to follow the shop's one way system.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 25, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Sep 25, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> This was just on the BBC news, woman goes mad after being asked to follow the shop's one way system.




lucky they didn't ask her to wear a mask


----------



## dessiato (Sep 25, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> This was just on the BBC news, woman goes mad after being asked to follow the shop's one way system.



“I’ve done nuffin’ wrong!” Well you have now.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 25, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Sep 25, 2020)

spring-peeper said:


> and for my Canadian friends, here is what is being circulated on facebook
> 
> View attachment 231687



I saw a load of people posting about the 90% false positive test rate yesterday. Raab and Redwood have both mentioned it adding fuel to the conspiracy fire raging across social media. 

Here's a good explanation of how it's statistically possible but not probable.

HuffPost is now a part of Verizon Media


----------



## 2hats (Sep 25, 2020)

Anju said:


> I saw a load of people posting about the 90% false positive test rate yesterday. Raab and Redwood have both mentioned it adding fuel to the conspiracy fire raging across social media.
> 
> Here's a good explanation of how it's statistically possible but not probable.
> 
> HuffPost is now a part of Verizon Media


Some people don't understand the difference in the statistics of self-selecting samples and true or quasi-random samples. That many journalists and politicians fall into this category is not surprising.
(This was covered in [the first half of] R4's More or Less this week and, originally, by David Spiegelhalter on twitter.)


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 25, 2020)

dessiato said:


> “I’ve done nuffin’ wrong!” Well you have now.


Looks like they probably got a nice clean mugshot so it shouldn't be long before she's in court.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 25, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> View attachment 231704


If that's real I hope there is a matching sign on the neighbouring house - 'beware of the selfish cunt next door who puts everyone at risk'


----------



## editor (Sep 25, 2020)

A bit more about the Brixton fuckwit 









						In photos: Anti-mask Covid-19 conspiracy fan scrawls on Brixton bus stop, Sept 2020
					

Seen at the Effra Road bus stop in Brixton yesterday was this message imploring people not to believe the “Covid propaganda.” Sadly, the anonymous author seems to have had no problems b…



					www.brixtonbuzz.com


----------



## elbows (Sep 25, 2020)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Sep 25, 2020)

dessiato said:


> “I’ve done nuffin’ wrong!”



All that red wine when you were planning on a fish supper?

Nuffin' wrong indeed


----------



## editor (Sep 25, 2020)




----------



## Almor (Sep 26, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 231813



Wait until she finds out about Slipknot


----------



## MrSki (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 26, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> View attachment 231831



Last page, and this was the reply. 



UnderAnOpenSky said:


> March called. It wants its Memes back.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 26, 2020)

We now have repeated responses to repeated posts


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Sep 26, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Last page, and this was the reply.




Clearly mx wcfc's and mine are the two best posts on the entire boards.


----------



## keybored (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Sep 26, 2020)

Mation said:


>



I mean, if you take it literally, then that sounds like an extremely good idea. I don't really want to touch anyone's eyes with my eyes, whether they're at my table or not!


----------



## Lord Camomile (Sep 26, 2020)

Personally I'm happy with no extended eye contact with people at my table either.


----------



## T & P (Sep 26, 2020)

Well, extended eye contact often leads to either fights or one-night stands, neither of which are advisable at the moment...


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 26, 2020)

editor said:


> A bit more about the Brixton fuckwit
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Why do they think the government would make it up? I just don't understand.

Been thinking of asking someone I know who is, apparently, in the know, but I really CBA to go there with her.


----------



## elbows (Sep 26, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> Why do they think the government would make it up? I just don't understand.



Mistrust and a sense of disenfranchisement very easily spill over into inappropriate areas.

Some people reach the wrong conclusions about how the world actually works. They might even start off with some of the right conclusions but then if they swap one untrusted mainstream news source for some alternative source of knowledge, belief and news that is even more bogus then its not hard to end up with worldview trouble. And they end up operating in a well-worm groove that takes them straight to shit when used in a pademic like this one.

The reasons people end up cynical are not so hard to spot, eg people seeing how the system involves plenty of rigged games, or existing mistrust due to previous failings or lies on the public health front. The war on drugs hasnt helped. There are so many other examples.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 26, 2020)

tbf the government does make all sorts of other shit up.


----------



## souljacker (Sep 26, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> Why do they think the government would make it up? I just don't understand.
> 
> Been thinking of asking someone I know who is, apparently, in the know, but I really CBA to go there with her.



It's not the govt that are making shit up. Its the NWO and the govt have been duped as well. Apparently.


----------



## quiet guy (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Sep 26, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 231697



is a dog's face acceptable?


----------



## brogdale (Sep 26, 2020)

I'm sure that Poundland (Sutton) know far more about window dressing that I do...but...that particularly juxtaposition doesn't seem to quite fit with the 'covid-secure' assurances.


----------



## Lord Camomile (Sep 26, 2020)

Halowe'en is almost certainly going to be even weirder than usual this year.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Sep 26, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> After Ebola-Chan (who cameos in the video) there was no going back.




also reddit


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 26, 2020)




----------



## William of Walworth (Sep 26, 2020)

T & P said:


> Well, extended eye contact often leads to either fights or one-night stands, *neither of which are advisable at the moment.*..



Some say that *both* can work well, depending on which pub you attend, obvs


----------



## William of Walworth (Sep 26, 2020)

quiet guy said:
			
		

>





back there :   

( and surely   too  )


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 27, 2020)

brogdale said:


> I'm sure that Poundland (Sutton) know far more about window dressing that I do...but...that particularly juxtaposition doesn't seem to quite fit with the 'covid-secure' assurances.
> 
> View attachment 231900


That is brilliant.


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 27, 2020)

two sheds said:


> tbf the government does make all sorts of other shit up.



I know that, I really, REALLY know that, but specifically why do people believe the government would invent a pandemic? To shut down the "enconomy" for a couple of months? To give me and many others months off work and then pay most of my wages? Why would they do that if it wasn't really a thing?


----------



## lizzieloo (Sep 27, 2020)

souljacker said:


> It's not the govt that are making shit up. Its the NWO and then govt have been duped as well. Apparently.



Why would _they_ make it up?

Christ, why am a asking for a sensible answer to a question about new world order  

* Goes off to do something less boring instead *


----------



## two sheds (Sep 27, 2020)

yep can't argue with any of that


----------



## Mation (Sep 27, 2020)

lizzieloo said:


> Why would _they_ make it up?
> 
> Christ, why am a asking for a sensible answer to a question about new world order
> 
> * Goes off to do something less boring instead *


Thank you for the Why Don't You? earworm


----------



## MrSki (Sep 28, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 28, 2020)

Yorkshire Post is quite trad tory. Interesting seeing blue-on-blue stuff like this.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 28, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Sep 28, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Sep 28, 2020)

Another celeb falls on her sword


----------



## elbows (Sep 28, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Another celeb falls on her sword
> 
> View attachment 232140



The vulnerable in this pandemic are like china in her hands.


----------



## Badgers (Sep 28, 2020)

elbows said:


> The vulnerable in this pandemic are like china in her hands.


Wish she had a bit more heart and soul in these unprecedented times


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 28, 2020)

Badgers said:


> Wish she had a bit more heart and soul in these unprecedented times


Takes me back to seeing them live at Leeds uni donkeys years ago.


----------



## TopCat (Sep 28, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You've probably put the entire country off pasties now.


That sauce in the cheese and onion bake.


----------



## MrSki (Sep 28, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Sep 28, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 29, 2020)




----------



## editor (Sep 29, 2020)

How about this Facebook conspira-clown calling doctors 'cowards'


----------



## ska invita (Sep 29, 2020)

keybored said:


> View attachment 232226


1970s called etc. 
Veganism is normal now


----------



## Artaxerxes (Sep 29, 2020)

ska invita said:


> 1970s called etc.
> Veganism is normal now



Eh it’s a bit of a curates egg.

Fine in places but plenty places still assuming vegetarian option means Mac n Cheese or a veggie burger (consisting of a well cooked sweet potato)


----------



## ska invita (Sep 29, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> Eh it’s a bit of a curates egg.
> 
> Fine in places but plenty places still assuming vegetarian option means Mac n Cheese or a veggie burger (consisting of a well cooked sweet potato)


yeah but that joke .... time to move on i think


----------



## existentialist (Sep 29, 2020)

editor said:


> How about this Facebook conspira-clown calling doctors 'cowards'
> 
> View attachment 232265


I think that anyone who insists the virus is not a threat should put their money where their mouth is and go and volunteer on Covid-19 wards in hospitals. Let's see how long that complacency lasts then...

Mind you, I can't see him lasting long in a hospital if he's going to go around calling doctors "cowards"


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 29, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I think that anyone who insists the virus is not a threat should put their money where their mouth is and go and volunteer on Covid-19 wards in hospitals.



And, without any PPE.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 29, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> And, without any PPE.


Well, it wouldn't be necessary, would it? 

It's a shame medics are ethical.


----------



## frogwoman (Sep 29, 2020)

Tbh it's probably better for the patients if there aren't any anti vaxxers shrieking about a plandemic on the covid ward


----------



## josef1878 2.0 (Sep 29, 2020)

Well she's done well, just a few days after downloading the app.


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 30, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Sep 30, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Sep 30, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 30, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 1, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 1, 2020)

Amazon to remove coronavirus Halloween masks from sale
					

There is a concern about upcoming Halloween events




					www.walesonline.co.uk
				




 , but also -


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

I'm not surprised, yep it's in bad taste but I'm not in the least bit surprised there's a market for this


----------



## two sheds (Oct 1, 2020)

bloody tempting in fact, particularly because nobody would know who was wearing it


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

I've got some coronavirus socks. I mean you might as well.


----------



## two sheds (Oct 1, 2020)

Like:



but socks?


----------



## Yossarian (Oct 1, 2020)

They'd probably help remind people to stay six feet away from you...


----------



## Yossarian (Oct 1, 2020)

I wonder if it would be more - or less - acceptable if you took a Boris Johnson mask and stuck a bunch of corona spikes to it.


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

I've got a better pic on my phone lol.


----------



## editor (Oct 1, 2020)

Say what?


----------



## T & P (Oct 1, 2020)

editor said:


> Say what?
> 
> View attachment 232540


I see your Kissing the Coronavirus and raise you to



Free to read as well...


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

editor said:


> Say what?
> 
> View attachment 232540


I started writing a fan fiction about Dominic Cummings falling in love with the coronavirus, I still need to finish it. I did a scene about Boris Johnson becoming infected from the viruses point of view lol. 

I got as far as Dom planning the trip to Durham


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

Again it's really bad taste but people are going to write that stuff, I mean the thing has dominated our lives this year so it's not surprising people are going to try and give it a personality and de-mystify it.


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

This was my first chapter lol 



> It was hard to believe it had been only 6 months since I left the Wuhan seafood market and set about my worldwide adventure. I sat inside the lungs of an infected patient, thinking about how my life had changed completely. I imagine, if you’re reading this, that your life has changed completely as well. But look at it this way. If for the last 20 years you had been spreading among bat caves in Wuhan, then take it from me, you would do the same. Bats are so boring. They don’t even get sick.
> But when a pangolin was placed into the bat cage in the Wuhan market, I took my opportunity and headed off into the world, and what a six months it was. Of course, things weren’t always easy, with all the social distancing going on, and the constant worries about vaccine treatments. But all in all, I was doing pretty well. How many millions of infections was it now?
> ‘Do you wanna ride?’ the pangolin had asked. ‘I want revenge for what those bastards did to me and my kind. I’ll go down fighting – they’ll go down coughing. Let’s go, baby!’
> Overwhelmed with excitement at the prospect of infectiing billions of new hosts, I had accepted the request. That would show the flu. Always rubbing it in about 1918, like she thought she was all that. ‘Like you’ll start a pandemic,’ she had laughed in those early Wuhan days. ‘You coronaviruses only cause colds, so if you did start one, nobody would notice.’
> ...


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 1, 2020)

frogwoman said:


> I started writing a fan fiction about Dominic Cummings falling in love with the coronavirus,



and the coronavirus not wanting to go near anything that toxic?


----------



## two sheds (Oct 1, 2020)

there's a large sympathy value for any coronavirus infecting Johnson


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 1, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

two sheds said:


> there's a large sympathy value for any coronavirus infecting Johnson




Yea I kind of like my version  of SARS-COV-2 as a character. I deliberately tried to make her seem more sympathetic than the Tories she infects


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 1, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> and the coronavirus not wanting to go near anything that toxic?



Oh they have a brief fling (and persuades him to take her up to Durham) and then she breaks up with him for being too much of a parasite


----------



## Epona (Oct 1, 2020)

frogwoman said:


> View attachment 232489
> 
> I've got a better pic on my phone lol.



2020 take on paisley, I am in...


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## Cerv (Oct 2, 2020)

cliques / six doesn't rhyme
but "he sees you if you mix" would work better


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## LDC (Oct 2, 2020)

The floodgates have been opened for Trump and covid memes surely....


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 2, 2020)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> The floodgates have been opened for Trump and covid memes surely....



Yep.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 2, 2020)

Cerv said:


> cliques / six doesn't rhyme
> but "he sees you if you mix" would work better


Some people pronounce "clique" as "click".

Such people are dead to me.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Oct 2, 2020)

Biden must be worried , he was in a room with him.


----------



## editor (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Oct 2, 2020)

I was just moaning about the buck-passing Johnsons latest shit and then the background reminded me of something.









						Covid-19: Boris Johnson says everybody got 'complacent' over virus
					

Boris Johnson says there was a "fraying of people's discipline and attention to" Covid rules over the summer.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## keybored (Oct 2, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Some people pronounce "clique" as "click".
> 
> Such people are dead to me.


"click" is the US pronunciation of "clique". If they spell something right, they pronounce it wrong and vice-versa.

Anyway...


----------



## belboid (Oct 2, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (Oct 4, 2020)

By Cold War Steve.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 5, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 5, 2020)




----------



## editor (Oct 5, 2020)

This is pretty splendid


----------



## belboid (Oct 5, 2020)

Mattress firm???


----------



## quimcunx (Oct 5, 2020)

belboid said:


> Mattress firm???



This.  Very much this. 

Also 2nd mention I've seen of Finland not existing in 24 hours.  What's that about?


----------



## belboid (Oct 5, 2020)

I’m also unsure bout what questions we have around princess diana or the magnificent FreeBritney campaign, but I’m happy to put them to one side for now


----------



## editor (Oct 5, 2020)

quimcunx said:


> This.  Very much this.
> 
> Also 2nd mention I've seen of Finland not existing in 24 hours.  What's that about?


It's an actual thing


----------



## editor (Oct 5, 2020)

And the mattress firm one 









						9. The Mattress Firm Conspiracy Theory
					

Why are there so many Mattress Firm stores? We team up with Endless Thread podcast to get to the bottom of this Reddit conspiracy.




					www.businessinsider.com


----------



## MickiQ (Oct 5, 2020)

I've not heard of some of those theories and have spent a fun half hour googling them. 
The Greta Thunberg one is based on a picture of a girl from 1898 who really is the absolute spitting image of her 
Quite eerie in fact but hardly proof of time travel, Unless this is Greta's great-grandma then its proof that people being mistaken for celebrities has been going on a lot longer than we think.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 5, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Oct 5, 2020)

editor said:


> And the mattress firm one
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I'm quite persuaded by the mattress firm money laundering. I at least have follow up questions for the deep state stooge who tried to explain it away.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 5, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Oct 5, 2020)

quimcunx said:


> I'm quite persuaded by the mattress firm money laundering. I at least have follow up questions for the deep state stooge who tried to explain it away.



Yes me too. There's a highly dodgy bloke up the road from us who takes in old mattresses and burns them illegally. They don't half stink  . We've complained but he's one of those people who don't give a shit and the council and the police don't seem dedicated enough to stop him. 

I think he's in on the whole thing


----------



## T & P (Oct 5, 2020)

Lana Del Rey criticised for wearing mesh mask to meet fans
					

"Please wear a real mask," plead the star's fans, after she attends a meet-and-greet in Los Angeles.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## DaveCinzano (Oct 5, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Oct 5, 2020)

frogwoman said:


> Biden must be worried , he was in a room with him.



Biden isn't female


----------



## belboid (Oct 5, 2020)

You can always rely on the classics


----------



## MrSki (Oct 5, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 6, 2020)




----------



## editor (Oct 6, 2020)

T & P said:


> Lana Del Rey criticised for wearing mesh mask to meet fans
> 
> 
> "Please wear a real mask," plead the star's fans, after she attends a meet-and-greet in Los Angeles.
> ...


----------



## MrSki (Oct 6, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 6, 2020)




----------



## petee (Oct 6, 2020)




----------



## keybored (Oct 6, 2020)

New to Twitter. How do I block this annoying guy?


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 6, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Oct 7, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 7, 2020)




----------



## editor (Oct 7, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Oct 7, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Oct 7, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Oct 7, 2020)

Elvis MacGonagall - the man's a genius:

Help Yourself
(Another Public Service Announcement 
by the UK Government)

Fight germs in the airport lounge
Fight germs on foreign beaches
Fight your fears, sweat blood and tears 
Recycle Churchill speeches

Keep Mammon alive 9 to 5
Commute for the greater glory
Dulce et decorum est
Pro Pret a Manger mori

Eat out to spread it about
Drop Jager Bombs on the virus
U-turn, reverse your ferret 
Twerk from home with Miley Cyrus 

Heed the rule of six feet under
Comply with the Da Vinci Code
Hands, face, space, drink, feck, arse
Follow the yellow brick road 

Save Christmas, never surrender
Don’t let the bells end, don’t give in
Get roaring drunk by 10pm
Let your hair down with discipline

Stiffen sinews, do your duty
England expects you to behave
Lock all empty stable doors
Wear smiley masks at a rave

Book a Covid test in Narnia
Isolate together without fail
Download Aladdin’s magic app
Track and trace the Holy Grail

Load up with silver bullets
Aim high, shoot grouse on the moon 
Button up your overcoat
Whistle a happy tune 

Don’t look back in anger
Don’t take your love to town
Hold a chicken in the air
Do the disco duck, get down

Help yourself, be viable
Find a new job, do the right thing
Cross your fingers, clutch at straws 
Hibernate, wake up next spring 

by elvis mcgonagall, october 2020


----------



## kabbes (Oct 7, 2020)

I loved that but if I’m brutally honest, I think there were three verses too many.


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 7, 2020)




----------



## frogwoman (Oct 7, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Oct 8, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Oct 8, 2020)

pesh said:


>


I have no mouth, and I must scream


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 8, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Oct 8, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 233422



Those masks cover the nose so they don't seem entirely useless, though I don't know why they couldn't just put the musicians further apart.

"The mask is a Czech invention for soloist Radek Baborák. The mouthpiece of the instrument goes inside it and the player then zips it up, additional protection being offered by a cloth filter inside the horn itself."  Czech Philharmonic perform benefit concert live from Prague


----------



## sideboob (Oct 8, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Oct 8, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> Those masks cover the nose so they don't seem entirely useless, though I don't know why they couldn't just put the musicians further apart.
> 
> "The mask is a Czech invention for soloist Radek Baborák. The mouthpiece of the instrument goes inside it and the player then zips it up, additional protection being offered by a cloth filter inside the horn itself."  Czech Philharmonic perform benefit concert live from Prague


I don’t get it.  You’re surely still expressing your breath outwards through the instrument, like a muck-spreader for coronavirus


----------



## Yossarian (Oct 8, 2020)

kabbes said:


> I don’t get it.  You’re surely still expressing your breath outwards through the instrument, like a muck-spreader for coronavirus



I think the designer aimed to stop the spreading of droplets with the mask over the nose and the filter inside the instrument, but I definitely wouldn't have wanted to be in or near that orchestra. Especially not next to the tuba.


----------



## two sheds (Oct 8, 2020)

they just need another mask over the end of the instrument


----------



## kabbes (Oct 8, 2020)

Let’s not forget that orchestras are awful at health and safety all round.  Like for example the viola player now suing because being placed right in front of the trombones has caused him tinnitus.  I wouldn’t trust that their say-so on safety means anything at all.


----------



## nogojones (Oct 8, 2020)




----------



## retribution (Oct 8, 2020)

Ken Clarke could be an interesting addition to a fantasy day drinking team, Badgers ? Probably not much stamina, mind. Maybe one to come across in a pub.

I feel inclusion of the words "the singer" kind of spoil the joke though. We don't need it explaining, Ken.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 8, 2020)

the real ken clarke is still a tory cunt.

just because the current bunch of tory cunts are even higher in the cuntitude scale, some people are being fooled that some of the previous bunch of tory cunts are almost decent in comparison...


----------



## retribution (Oct 8, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 233545
> 
> the real ken clarke is still a tory cunt.
> 
> just because the current bunch of tory cunts are even higher in the cuntitude scale, some people are being fooled that some of the previous bunch of tory cunts are almost decent in comparison...


Duped, damn. But as Tory cunts go, he is a milder case (the real one).


----------



## Mation (Oct 9, 2020)

two sheds said:


> they just need another mask over the end of the instrument


----------



## Elpenor (Oct 9, 2020)

A friend has put this skin on his bass drum, as "Rishi has fucked more musicians than Patsy Kensit"


----------



## Mation (Oct 10, 2020)

Elpenor said:


> A friend has put this skin on his bass drum, as "Rishi has fucked more musicians than Patsy Kensit"
> View attachment 233736


What year is it?


----------



## Elpenor (Oct 10, 2020)

Mation said:


> What year is it?



Sometime in the 80s judging by his music taste


----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 10, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Oct 11, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Oct 11, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Oct 11, 2020)

Mural in Dublin 😁


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 11, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Oct 12, 2020)

MrSki said:


>











						Surrey records almost 150 new coronavirus cases - here's where
					

Elmbridge again saw the biggest increase in Covid-19 infections, latest figures show



					www.google.co.uk
				



To put that in context, Elmbridge had 21 cases yesterday (down from 33 a few days ago).

By contrast, Bury (currently at well over 200 cases per day per 100k people) is getting those kind of figures in individual suburbs. 









						Latest coronavirus hotspots in Bury revealed
					

A total of 60 new cases were recorded in the Sedgley Park area between September 29 and October 5




					www.google.co.uk
				




You do need to look at more than the number per 100k on an individual day to get a feel for how the infection is going.  Saying that, there’s no doubt that ministers are taking a NIMBY attitude to lockdowns, which is pathetic.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)

Cunts.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 12, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Cunts.


Is this for real? "Ballet is shit, become a computer programmer instead"?


----------



## existentialist (Oct 12, 2020)

kabbes said:


> Let’s not forget that orchestras are awful at health and safety all round.  Like for example the viola player now suing because being placed right in front of the trombones has caused him tinnitus.  I wouldn’t trust that their say-so on safety means anything at all.


Not to mention the huge puddles of spit that inevitably collect around the brass department... 

And I reckon those velvet bow ties are a virus-magnet.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Is this for real? "Ballet is shit, become a computer programmer instead"?


Unfortunately as far as I know it is. "Rethink, reskill & reboot" sounds like it comes from a certain stable.


----------



## Espresso (Oct 12, 2020)

It's even worse than that. 
How many Muslim girls do you know who are ballerinas? They didn't call the girl in that advert Fatima by accident. The shower of shits.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 12, 2020)

Espresso said:


> It's even worse than that.
> How many Muslim girls do you know who are ballerinas? They didn't call the girl in that advert Fatima by accident. The shower of shits.


They probably thought they were "being inclusive" - or, more cynically, expected to be able to peddle that line and use "hey, we're only being inclusive" as a justification.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 12, 2020)

I got hedgerow accommodation administrator...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 12, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Cunts.



That particular image does seem a bad choice in view of the arts being in trouble, but it's one of a whole series of ads using different stock images of young people, doing various jobs, from stacking shelves, via working in a kitchen to someone doing some engineering job. Not a bad campaign in normal times, but they certainly wasn't reading the room when choosing to run with that image ATM.

The scheme itself is - 'the CyberFirst  programme offers bursaries to undergraduate students, delivers short courses in cyber security for young people aged 11 – 19', that seems to have been launched on the 23rd January 2020, so clearly planned well before covid.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 12, 2020)

Posted on the main thread, it's apparently from last year.



killer b said:


> It is real, but it's from last year and was part of a series


----------



## existentialist (Oct 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Posted on the main thread, it's apparently from last year.


Given what the Government are currently doing to the arts, it might have been smart of them to quietly pull any of the advertisements along the lines of Fatima.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 12, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Given what the Government are currently doing to the arts, it might have been smart of them to quietly pull any of the advertisements along the lines of Fatima.



Being as it's from last year, and the scheme was launched in January, I've no idea if they are still using it or if twitter has just blown a gasket over nowt.


----------



## MickiQ (Oct 12, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 233545
> 
> the real ken clarke is still a tory cunt.
> 
> just because the current bunch of tory cunts are even higher in the cuntitude scale, some people are being fooled that some of the previous bunch of tory cunts are almost decent in comparison...


Bit like how Trump makes Dubya look like a great statesman


----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Being as it's from last year, and the scheme was launched in January, I've no idea if they are still using it or if twitter has just blown a gasket over nowt.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 12, 2020)

MrSki said:


>




So, just a stock image as I mentioned above, totally normal in advertising.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Oct 12, 2020)

Boris' next job could be in the South Atlantic industrial zone
He just doesn't know it yet


----------



## pesh (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 12, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> View attachment 234043


Nothing would make me happier to see that cunt end up in prison.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## zora (Oct 12, 2020)

In response to the above: Just when I thought the covid meme game has dried up a little, along comes this golden wide open Tory PR own goal


----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 12, 2020)

apologies in advance if its been posted before, couldnt see it when skimming through..


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 12, 2020)

Just heard on 5Live that the Fatima advert has now been withdrawn.   

Twitter does work sometimes.


----------



## frogwoman (Oct 12, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



Does she know her photo is being used for this purpose?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 12, 2020)

frogwoman said:


> Does she know her photo is being used for this purpose?



I doubt it, it's most likely from any one of a number of 'stock photo libraries' used by graphic designers, etc.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> I doubt it, it's most likely from any one of a number of 'stock photo libraries' used by graphic designers, etc.


Someone posted somewhere (twitter?) that it's a photo from North America, don't know whether it was a generic agency pic though.


----------



## Roadkill (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 12, 2020)

Tbh I thought ‘cyber’ was some sort of porn cam thing, (“do you do cyber?’) which made the advert look several magnitudes more dodgy. Though I suspect such a career move would be seen as a positive outcome by a lot of tories.


----------



## gentlegreen (Oct 12, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


> Tbh I thought ‘cyber’ was some sort of porn cam thing, (“do you do cyber?’) which made the advert look several magnitudes more dodgy. Though I suspect such a career move would be seen as a positive outcome by a lot of tories.


Indeed. I can't stop that being my first thought. perhaps it's a function of advanced age and having read most of William Gibson's books.

It must be a Millennial use of the word...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 12, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


> Tbh I thought ‘cyber’ was some sort of porn cam thing, (“do you do cyber?’) which made the advert look several magnitudes more dodgy. Though I suspect such a career move would be seen as a positive outcome by a lot of tories.


It is a word, albeit annoying, that is inevitable.  

https://www.ncsc.gov.uk/ 

They're basically part of GCHQ and the term is one of those things I think we can't escape now.  We had the chance 10/20 years ago but blew it.


----------



## Badgers (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 12, 2020)

Posted on bandwidth thread but worth another go...


----------



## Artaxerxes (Oct 12, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


> Tbh I thought ‘cyber’ was some sort of porn cam thing, (“do you do cyber?’) which made the advert look several magnitudes more dodgy. Though I suspect such a career move would be seen as a positive outcome by a lot of tories.



It was a term for chat based sex around the early-2000s.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 12, 2020)

SpookyFrank said:


> Posted on bandwidth thread but worth another go...
> 
> View attachment 234118



Why post that again?


----------



## SpookyFrank (Oct 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Why post that again?



It was an accident, I meant to post a thing about burning igloos.


----------



## editor (Oct 12, 2020)

The Brixton dickhead is back 



Meanwhile Covid: the 10th worst disaster in Great Britain and Ireland by death toll in recorded history


----------



## A380 (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 12, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 12, 2020)

editor said:


> The Brixton dickhead is back
> 
> View attachment 234122
> 
> Meanwhile Covid: the 10th worst disaster in Great Britain and Ireland by death toll in recorded history



Please can you go back to that one on the left with a marker pen, cross out the last two words and replace with ‘bollocks you read on the internet’.


----------



## chilango (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Oct 13, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> View attachment 234160


Oh, very good


----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## Espresso (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)

Pearoast


----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)

Sorry for the spam but I think it's important to keep an historical record


----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## killer b (Oct 13, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> View attachment 234212


Real opportunity missed here. It should be 'rethink, reskill, robot'


----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## Lord Camomile (Oct 13, 2020)

editor said:


> The Brixton dickhead is back
> 
> View attachment 234122
> 
> Meanwhile Covid: the 10th worst disaster in Great Britain and Ireland by death toll in recorded history


Always feel like they're not quite making the argument they think they are. If there _are _33 causes of higher death rates (question, of course, is how many of those are contagious), surely the argument there is that we should take those 33 causes _more _seriously...?


----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)

I love the chocolate teapot.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 13, 2020)

MrSki said:


> I love the chocolate teapot.



We know, you gave it a 'haha' reaction just yesterday.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> We know, you gave it a 'haha' reaction just yesterday.


I certainly can be a twat at times.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)

I expect this has been done before but can't be arsed to look back. Sorry.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 13, 2020)

MrSki said:


> I certainly can be a twat at times.



Yep. 


MrSki said:


> I expect this has been done before but can't be arsed to look back. Sorry.


Can't be arsed to look back?

You only need to remember what you liked under 24 hours ago.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Yep.
> 
> Can't be arsed to look back?
> 
> You only need to remember what you liked under 24 hours ago.


Well at least I didn't post it.   My memory is not what it was.


----------



## two sheds (Oct 13, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> We know, you gave it a 'haha' reaction just yesterday.


You expect Ski not to like it now after he found it funny yesterday?

Such inconsistency


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 13, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Well at least I didn't post it.   My memory is not what it was.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 13, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 234227


That's a myth - goldfish do have fairly good memories. Better than elephants probably.


----------



## two sheds (Oct 13, 2020)

Was in an Indian restaurant years ago looking at a fish tank and a mate said "you know, Arthur, goldfish can't see out of the tank" so I waved my hand in front of it and they all scattered. "I was talking shit, mate"


----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## josef1878 2.0 (Oct 13, 2020)

crossthebreeze said:


> View attachment 234161


Is that the Steve Pottinger who worked with Steve Ignorant on his autobiography?


----------



## crossthebreeze (Oct 13, 2020)

josef1878 2.0 said:


> Is that the Steve Pottinger who worked with Steve Ignorant on his autobiography?


i have no idea


----------



## William of Walworth (Oct 13, 2020)

josef1878 2.0 said:


> Is that the Steve Pottinger who worked with Steve Ignorant on his autobiography?






			
				crossthebreeze said:
			
		

> i have no idea



Yes


----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 13, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 14, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> It was a term for chat based sex around the early-2000s.



 See, I knew my brain wasn’t just making that up at random!


----------



## Yossarian (Oct 14, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Oct 14, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 234266


I _knew_ I should have put invisible mountain lions on my October bingo card


----------



## A380 (Oct 14, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 14, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 234288


Well horses can contract nasty viruses like Hendra which is a nasty disease.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 14, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Oct 14, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


I'm sure editor's on it


----------



## DaveCinzano (Oct 14, 2020)

Berlin gives middle finger to anti-maskers in tourism agency ad
					

Agency says it chose message that suits city’s outlier character but some politicians are critical




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## T & P (Oct 14, 2020)




----------



## krtek a houby (Oct 14, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 234266



Lions, damned lions and statistics


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Oct 14, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 15, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Oct 15, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Oct 15, 2020)

Unable to resist due to my username here.


----------



## elbows (Oct 15, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Oct 15, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 15, 2020)




----------



## pieandmashfirm (Oct 15, 2020)




----------



## Elpenor (Oct 15, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 234490


Overlay the tube map?


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 15, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 16, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Oct 16, 2020)

Its the bloody Hammersmith Bridge isn't it?  Good strategy to just leave it their rotting away.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 16, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Oct 17, 2020)

Translation: Corona denial saves jobs (in the Viennese funeral industry).


----------



## Lurdan (Oct 17, 2020)

Covid 19 - Stricter Rules

"Rather than spelling out what is now prohibited
here is the list of what is still permitted"

WORK


----------



## MrSki (Oct 17, 2020)




----------



## smmudge (Oct 17, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Oct 17, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Oct 17, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 17, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Oct 18, 2020)

A380 said:


> View attachment 234709


That's not inverted, unless reality is rotated around the x axis and the other side of reality is blue (and/or likewise parody, red).


----------



## Roadkill (Oct 18, 2020)

Pandemic news, 1995 style.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 18, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 19, 2020)

For me, this is how I will remember the covid years.
A seven year old out picking apples with no-one around.



It's my granddaughter.
Mask on as we walked to the orchard, and she it never dawned on her to take it off.


----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 19, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Oct 20, 2020)

Video so can't screengrab as well, sorry.

More of this please.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## spitfire (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Oct 20, 2020)

spitfire said:


> Video so can't screengrab as well, sorry.
> 
> More of this please.



Who’s the Ozzy dickhead?


----------



## Espresso (Oct 20, 2020)

He's a Kiwi called Dan Wootton.
He's the one Johnny Depp's suing, along with The Sun -  which Wootton is the Editor of - for calling Depp a wife beater.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Oct 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 21, 2020)

> Last week, Russian trolls were blamed for fake news that the Oxford vaccine would turn people into chimpanzees.
> 
> Pictures like this portrayal of Boris Johnson as 'bigfoot' holding a folder headed 'AstraZeneca' were shown on Russian TV.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 21, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Oct 21, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Oct 21, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 22, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Oct 22, 2020)




----------



## fishfinger (Oct 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 22, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 22, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 23, 2020)




----------



## William of Walworth (Oct 23, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


>




I wish I understood that  
You incomprehensible bloody Northerners


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Oct 23, 2020)

William of Walworth said:


> I wish I understood that
> You incomprehensible bloody Northerners


pi barm


----------



## William of Walworth (Oct 23, 2020)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> pi barm



Still not there .....


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 23, 2020)




----------



## nogojones (Oct 24, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 24, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Oct 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 24, 2020)




----------



## editor (Oct 25, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Oct 25, 2020)

gosub said:


>



I wonder what it'll be like as the weather gets colder and we can see each others' breath.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 25, 2020)




----------



## two sheds (Oct 25, 2020)

should be drinking corona there


----------



## MrSki (Oct 25, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Oct 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 26, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 26, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Oct 27, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Oct 27, 2020)

So what's the deal with Halloween this year? Does Covid mean there'll be no kids ringing our doorbells this year demanding sweets and threatening an egging for non-compliance? If so, I for one welcome our new viral overlods.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 27, 2020)

T & P said:


> So what's the deal with Halloween this year? Does Covid mean there'll be no kids ringing our doorbells this year demanding sweets and threatening an egging for non-compliance? If so, I for one welcome our new viral overlods.


Answer the door with some sweets in your hand, spit on them and offer them to the kids, daring them to take them.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 27, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Oct 28, 2020)




----------



## quimcunx (Oct 28, 2020)

T & P said:


> So what's the deal with Halloween this year? Does Covid mean there'll be no kids ringing our doorbells this year demanding sweets and threatening an egging for non-compliance? If so, I for one welcome our new viral overlods.



While the giving of sweets is verboten egging is a socially distanced pursuit and so permissible.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 28, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Oct 28, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 28, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Oct 28, 2020)

Of course it’s the fucking government’s fault.


----------



## Badgers (Oct 29, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Oct 29, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 236433


The author of this (and that company is now listed in Companies House, so it seems to be true), might have managed find a clever way to stick two fingers to The Man, but he's also being a Grade-A cunt and no mistake.


----------



## pesh (Oct 29, 2020)

fuck having to file a tax return just for Christmas dinner.


----------



## two sheds (Oct 29, 2020)

On the plus side Christmas dinner would be tax deductible.


----------



## Badgers (Oct 29, 2020)

T & P said:


> The author of this (and that company is now listed in Companies House, so it seems to be true), might have managed find a clever way to stick two fingers to The Man, but he's also being a Grade-A cunt and no mistake.


Yup. Probably voted Brexit 👍


----------



## Yossarian (Oct 29, 2020)




----------



## Teaboy (Oct 29, 2020)

pesh said:


> fuck having to file a tax return just for Christmas dinner.



Thousands of companies are set up each year that nothing happens with and tax returns are never done.  Taxman can't chase them all so just assumes they never started trading.  Its actually a very profitable tax scam if you're that way inclined.

Guy is a wanker though. Its not like the police are going to be knocking on your door on Christmas day, if you're that bothered by the rules just ignore them like every other young person.


----------



## Mation (Oct 30, 2020)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 236442


It's my maison d'etre.


----------



## A380 (Oct 30, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Oct 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 30, 2020)




----------



## danski (Oct 30, 2020)

Pretty sure it’s being posted already but booze.


----------



## Clair De Lune (Oct 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 236618


I found one of these in the street the other day. Washed it and took it home.


----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 30, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Oct 31, 2020)

Clair De Lune said:


> I found one of these in the street the other day. Washed it and took it home.


But that's how it spreads!


----------



## A380 (Oct 31, 2020)




----------



## brogdale (Oct 31, 2020)

One for the Brixtonians....  

& a guaranteed ear worm!


----------



## A380 (Oct 31, 2020)




----------



## kebabking (Oct 31, 2020)

Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough....


----------



## bimble (Oct 31, 2020)




----------



## Ax^ (Oct 31, 2020)

kebabking said:


> View attachment 236748
> 
> Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough....



not going shopping today cannie be arsed

but like last time this happens cannie help but hope that few people out stripping the shelves of supermarkets end up getting covid from it


----------



## T & P (Oct 31, 2020)

kebabking said:


> View attachment 236748
> 
> Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough....


There is no need for voilence; civilised people trade. I have here for instance a 1kg packet of flour and half dozen eggs, which I reckon is more than a fair exchange for your pack of toilet rolls.


----------



## DotCommunist (Oct 31, 2020)

you can wash your arse but you can't eat toilet roll

-Sun Tzu


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 31, 2020)

DotCommunist said:


> you can wash your arse but you can't eat toilet roll
> 
> -Sun Tzu



my two year old would disagree with that.


----------



## eatmorecheese (Oct 31, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 31, 2020)

at least some leadership was shown in downing street this evening


----------



## Sprocket. (Nov 1, 2020)

I got this on Thursday.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 1, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 1, 2020)




----------



## Anju (Nov 1, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Nov 1, 2020)

Well, this wasn’t on my 2020 bingo card











						Escaped cloned female mutant crayfish take over cemetery
					

Marbled crayfish can reproduce asexually and all their children are genetically females.




					www.nzherald.co.nz


----------



## frogwoman (Nov 1, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## rubbershoes (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Nov 2, 2020)

rubbershoes said:


> View attachment 237027


----------



## T & P (Nov 2, 2020)

belboid said:


> Well, this wasn’t on my 2020 bingo card
> 
> View attachment 236933
> 
> ...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (Nov 2, 2020)

Cold War Steve on fine form.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Nov 2, 2020)

I hope this hasnt been posted for a while but its apt enough for another look.


----------



## gosub (Nov 2, 2020)

Random Lockdown Generator
					

Generate your own lockdown restrictions!




					phillsacre.me.uk


----------



## nogojones (Nov 2, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Nov 3, 2020)

Badgers said:


>


----------



## Buddy Bradley (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Nov 3, 2020)

Badgers said:


>



Obviously Magna Carta did die in vain.


----------



## crossthebreeze (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Nov 3, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Nov 4, 2020)




----------



## Espresso (Nov 4, 2020)




----------



## clicker (Nov 4, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Nov 4, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Nov 4, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Nov 4, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Nov 4, 2020)

T & P said:


> View attachment 237328


 (((banana bread)))


----------



## T & P (Nov 4, 2020)

existentialist said:


> (((banana bread)))


It’s fine, you can still make it, just don’t flaunt it 

TBF, whereas I’m never been a fan of social media and people showing off every minor achievement they manage, in the time of Covid we can all do with a little extra socialising and praise, and I wouldn’t even describe someone sharing a kitchen triumph as bragging, especially if attempting a dish for the first time. But those people constantly informing us of their all-so-impressive new personal running 5k time, or bicycle distance covered can get to fuck.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 5, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Nov 5, 2020)

I think one thing I have learnt is that, much to my surprise, I actually hate little more than shit jokes written on a horrible yellow background with stupid crying emojis.


----------



## danski (Nov 5, 2020)

kabbes said:


> I think one thing I have learnt is that, much to my surprise, I actually hate little more than shit jokes written on a horrible yellow background with stupid crying emojis.


But how on earth are you supposed to know if it’s funny or not?


----------



## existentialist (Nov 5, 2020)

danski said:


> But how on earth are you supposed to know if it’s funny or not?


An irrefutable point.


----------



## Orang Utan (Nov 5, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Nov 5, 2020)

danski said:


> But how on earth are you supposed to know if it’s funny or not?


From the JPEG artefacts.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 5, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 5, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 5, 2020)

it's been added to


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 5, 2020)

(manchester, according to teh tweeter)


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Nov 6, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> (manchester, according to teh tweeter)


Yep, it's round the corner from Manchester Piccadilly.


----------



## Mation (Nov 6, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 237510


No.


----------



## T & P (Nov 6, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> it's been added to


The graffiti is missing 'We' at the beginning. At the moment it's one syllable too short to match the song's tune. It's actually very annoying and someone should do something about it


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 7, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 7, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 9, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 9, 2020)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Nov 10, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 12, 2020)




----------



## editor (Nov 12, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 238498


Pixels excelsis


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 12, 2020)

editor said:


> Pixels excelsis



So often the case with these things, doesn't alter the joke.


----------



## quiet guy (Nov 12, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Nov 13, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> View attachment 238560


Has Karen been fired?


----------



## MrSki (Nov 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 14, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 14, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 14, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Nov 14, 2020)




----------



## editor (Nov 15, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Nov 15, 2020)

View attachment IMG_1248.MP4


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 16, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 16, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 16, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Nov 16, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 16, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 17, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 239194


----------



## Petcha (Nov 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 17, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 17, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 239194


But not a dog’s!


----------



## dessiato (Nov 17, 2020)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 239194


I think you should always wear a face, it seems only polite to do so.


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 17, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 17, 2020)

NSFW sound.

View attachment 2.mp4


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 17, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 18, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 19, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 19, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Nov 19, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 19, 2020)

Want


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 19, 2020)




----------



## gentlegreen (Nov 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 20, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 20, 2020)

(have seen it before - apologies if it was on this thread...)


----------



## mx wcfc (Nov 20, 2020)




----------



## spring-peeper (Nov 21, 2020)




----------



## Yossarian (Nov 21, 2020)

Would a chicken or something be OK or will it take something bigger to appease the Corona gods?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 21, 2020)




----------



## kabbes (Nov 21, 2020)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 239722


That might actually work as a result of the “rhyme as reason” effect.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Nov 21, 2020)

(from twitter)


----------



## A380 (Nov 21, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Nov 21, 2020)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 239722


More straight forward

"Mask it or Kark it"


----------



## Orang Utan (Nov 21, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> More straight forward
> 
> "Mask it or Kark it"


only works if you're southern


----------



## donkyboy (Nov 21, 2020)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 239392



God looks like leo di caprio


----------



## Sprocket. (Nov 22, 2020)

Julian Popov (@julianpopov) Tweeted: You eat sausages your whole life but you refuse vaccine because you don’t know what’s in it.


----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 22, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> only works if you're southern


Even then it’s a stretch, surely?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 22, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Nov 22, 2020)

No Context British Headlines


----------



## MrSki (Nov 22, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Nov 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 23, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 23, 2020)

View attachment 2.mp4


----------



## spring-peeper (Nov 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 24, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 24, 2020)

Edit. Wrong thread


----------



## MrSki (Nov 24, 2020)




----------



## editor (Nov 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 25, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 26, 2020)

This is very clever, Two Ronnies style. 

View attachment 2.mp4


----------



## magneze (Nov 26, 2020)

Oh good. Embedded TikTok videos that don't play.


----------



## two sheds (Nov 26, 2020)

Yes I had to go to Chromium where I've not got any ad blockers to play it.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 26, 2020)

magneze said:


> Oh good. Embedded TikTok videos that don't play.



I've edited & provided a link.

Fucking thing


----------



## magneze (Nov 26, 2020)

Watch on TikTok? No thanks.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 26, 2020)

magneze said:


> Watch on TikTok? No thanks.



Fixed now, I ended up downloading it & then uploading it here.


----------



## Teaboy (Nov 26, 2020)




----------



## pesh (Nov 26, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Nov 26, 2020)

pesh said:


>


That has made me think of The Blob - not seen that for donkeys year so will see if it's available in the public domain.


----------



## editor (Nov 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 26, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Nov 26, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


It's an idea that's catching on,,,,,


----------



## MrSki (Nov 26, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 26, 2020)

editor said:


> View attachment 240545


Sorry but I am being really thick here. Anyone care to explain it to the idiot?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 26, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Sorry but I am being really thick here. Anyone care to explain it to the idiot?


No, you are not being thick, it's a seriously dumb message suggesting pubs should be free to serve alcohol without serving food.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 26, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



So old, mate, that was knocking around right from the start of this shit. 

Back in the days that my local Tesco had run out of all beer, except fucking Corona.


----------



## MrSki (Nov 26, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> No, you are not being thick, it's a seriously dumb message suggesting pubs should be free to serve alcohol without serving food.


I was been thick cos I was looking for a difference in the photos and never spotted the plate.


----------



## MrSki (Nov 26, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> So old, mate, that was knocking around right from the start of this shit.
> 
> Back in the days that my local Tesco had run out of all beer, except fucking Corona.


So was the tabasco sauce but I never pulled you up on it. 

If anyone could be arsed I bet there are some posts on this thread that have hit four of five repeats.


----------



## Raheem (Nov 26, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> No, you are not being thick, it's a seriously dumb message suggesting pubs should be free to serve alcohol without serving food.


Or you could read it as pubs should not be serving alcohol and having a burger doesn't make it any safer. Ambiguous.


----------



## The39thStep (Nov 26, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 27, 2020)

Raheem said:


> Or you could read it as pubs should not be serving alcohol and having a burger doesn't make it any safer. Ambiguous.



Yet it does make a difference, as has been discussed to death on the main covid thread, and the reason why so many countries tend to target the 'wet trade' first, because people having a couple of drinks with a meal are far more likely to maintain social distancing, than those just out for a night's drinking, and thus are safer.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 27, 2020)

MrSki said:


> So was the tabasco sauce but I never pulled you up on it.
> 
> If anyone could be arsed I bet there are some posts on this thread that have hit four of five repeats.



I only quoted to add the fact that it was crazy back in april when people were avoiding Corna lager in Tesco.


----------



## Teaboy (Nov 27, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Yet it does make a difference, as has been discussed to death on the main covid thread, and the reason why so many countries tend to target the 'wet trade' first, because people having a couple of drinks with a meal are far more likely to maintain social distancing, than those just out for a night's drinking, and thus are safer.



The science behind it may be fine but as a rule it is objectively stupid.  Impossible to police, impossible to enforce and actually impossible to actually properly legislate for. What one person regards as a substantial meal will vary wildly to the next person.  At any other time we would be laughing at the sheer stupidity of it.

These are strange and difficult times but we shouldn't just accept stupid rules and laws because we're scared.  Close and compensate.

Anyway, lols thread...


----------



## editor (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## editor (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## editor (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Nov 27, 2020)

(oops, forgot I stole it from here in the first place)


----------



## MrSki (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 27, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


Don’t wash the turkey! That’s bad food hygiene.


----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 27, 2020)

Oh, gosh...is it to do with gravy on chips?


----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 27, 2020)

To save you searching, I’ll tell you what the article says.  You’ll never believe it! 



Spoiler: “amazing reason”



The prevalence of Covid is high there.


----------



## editor (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Nov 27, 2020)

I am shocked, shocked, to discover Eric Clapton is a loon









						Eric Clapton teams with Van Morrison for anti-lockdown protest song "Stand and Deliver"
					

Eric Clapton performs on a new anti-lockdown protest single written by Van Morrison called "Stand and Deliver". It arrives on December 4th.




					consequenceofsound.net


----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 27, 2020)

belboid said:


> I am shocked, shocked to discover Eric Clapton is a loon
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Rock against twats.


----------



## SheilaNaGig (Nov 27, 2020)

Didn’t we already have Stand And Deliver?







Highway robbery, money or your life, throw your safety overboard... . etc.

So it’s a cover version?


----------



## editor (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 27, 2020)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 28, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Nov 28, 2020)




----------



## Aladdin (Nov 28, 2020)

The Late Late Toy show last night.
This little lad just got to everyone.  
Pure joy.


----------



## Sprocket. (Nov 29, 2020)

I am hearing rumours that Chris Rea is selling his car as there is just no point this year!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 29, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2020)

Should help with social distancing too.


----------



## MrSki (Nov 30, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 30, 2020)

Confused by this. Sean Bean lives in Dorset (T2). I have seen him down Sainsbury's.


----------



## fishfinger (Nov 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 30, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 30, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Nov 30, 2020)

The ‘host’ of the snp conference is an anti-vaxxer









						SNP conference host blasted for sharing Covid conspiracy theories
					

Questioning the vaccine plans, Hayley Matthews tweeted that a coronavirus conspiracy theory was “speaking the truth” and claimed nature is “the best medicine”.




					www.dailyrecord.co.uk


----------



## editor (Nov 30, 2020)




----------



## Dogsauce (Nov 30, 2020)

belboid said:


> I am shocked, shocked, to discover Eric Clapton is a loon
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Tiers in heaven?


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 30, 2020)

Dogsauce said:


> Tiers in heaven?



Loondance?


----------



## MrSki (Nov 30, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Nov 30, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


If only there had been some way of avoiding this from happening...


----------



## Yossarian (Dec 1, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 1, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 1, 2020)

Starts at 0.40. it's excellent!


----------



## LDC (Dec 1, 2020)

editor said:


> Starts at 0.40. it's excellent!




Xmas Charts number 1 for sure.


----------



## thismoment (Dec 1, 2020)

Saw an advert for a teeth flossing cleaner and my sleep deprived mind read “plague” cleaner instead of plaque” cleaner


----------



## two sheds (Dec 1, 2020)

thismoment said:


> Saw an advert for a teeth flossing cleaner and my sleep deprived mind read “plague” cleaner instead of plaque” cleaner


I think you'll find that's mouthwash









						Could mouthwash really protect you against coronavirus?
					

New study suggests mouthwash can kill Covid-19 within 30 seconds




					www.independent.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Dec 1, 2020)

two sheds said:


> I think you'll find that's mouthwash
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Wray & Nephews over proof?


----------



## two sheds (Dec 1, 2020)

MrSki said:


> Wray & Nephews over proof?



We should all write in and request they add 0.07% cetylpyridinium chloride (CPC).


----------



## thismoment (Dec 1, 2020)

two sheds said:


> We should all write in and request they add 0.07% cetylpyridinium chloride (CPC).



can you drink it with tonic water?


----------



## two sheds (Dec 1, 2020)

Brushing teeth with gin & CPC becomes the new normal


----------



## MrSki (Dec 1, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 2, 2020)




----------



## thismoment (Dec 2, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



quarantine Barbie’s hair is suspiciously professionally done


----------



## dessiato (Dec 2, 2020)

thismoment said:


> quarantine Barbie’s hair is suspiciously professionally done


Maybe she has a hairdresser in her bubble.


----------



## Serene (Dec 2, 2020)

I think the Gentleman across the road had too many substantial meals last night the way he was staggering, coming home.


----------



## Badgers (Dec 2, 2020)




----------



## thismoment (Dec 2, 2020)

thismoment said:


> quarantine Barbie’s hair is suspiciously professionally done



hairdresser & chef would be the ultimate bubble people for me!!


----------



## The39thStep (Dec 2, 2020)




----------



## Poot (Dec 2, 2020)

thismoment said:


> quarantine Barbie’s hair is suspiciously professionally done


She is about 20lb too far away from the fridge, too.


----------



## MrSki (Dec 2, 2020)




----------



## Septimus Rufiji (Dec 2, 2020)

she's made a lot of new friends is what she's done


----------



## belboid (Dec 2, 2020)

Blocked a lot of blokes, more likely


----------



## MrSki (Dec 3, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Dec 3, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 3, 2020)

*Coronavirus - 1970s Public Information Film *


----------



## mx wcfc (Dec 3, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Dec 3, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 3, 2020)

The39thStep said:


>



Wrong thread. Is a clip from Dec-19.


----------



## frogwoman (Dec 4, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Dec 4, 2020)

What a bell end, exempting high earner travellers as if they have automatic immunity   




Rt Hon Grant Shapps MP

@grantshapps
New Business Traveller exemption: From 4am on Sat 5th Dec high-value business travellers will no longer need to self-isolate when returning to ENGLAND from a country NOT in a travel corridor, allowing more travel to support the economy and jobs. Conditions apply.


----------



## magneze (Dec 4, 2020)

What does "high value" actually mean? Unable to use video calls? Seems pretty low value to me.


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 4, 2020)

magneze said:


> What does "high value" actually mean? Unable to use video calls? Seems pretty low value to me.


Arms dealers, offshore accountants


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 4, 2020)

magneze said:


> What does "high value" actually mean?


Probably broadly equates to 'selfish cunt' I guess.


----------



## elbows (Dec 4, 2020)

Elaborate neoliberal courtship rituals, seal the deal with a moneyshot.


----------



## Sprocket. (Dec 4, 2020)

frogwoman said:


> View attachment 241726


Also Thatcher’s former employer, J. Lyons & Co. She worked as a development scientist for them, allegedly working on soft ice-cream.
She was reminded of this in her later life when visiting them.


----------



## spitfire (Dec 4, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Dec 4, 2020)

View attachment trim.752A1AA9-2714-44ED-B1B2-90759D4D694F.MOV


----------



## MrSki (Dec 4, 2020)




----------



## eatmorecheese (Dec 4, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 5, 2020)




----------



## Badgers (Dec 5, 2020)

Have to say I have greatly enjoyed the use of this image throughout the pandemic  I hope that it becomes more widely used.


----------



## editor (Dec 5, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Dec 5, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Dec 6, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 7, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Dec 7, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 7, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 7, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 8, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Dec 8, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


I do hope that facts are involved in this story...


----------



## 8115 (Dec 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I do hope that facts are involved in this story...


The couple who set up the company who developed one of the vaccines are both German of Turkish origin. I think he was born in Turkey but she was born in Germany to Turkish parents.


----------



## fishfinger (Dec 8, 2020)

existentialist said:


> I do hope that facts are involved in this story...


Alternate facts.

Does an Old Photo Show COVID Vax Creator as an Immigrant in Germany?


----------



## existentialist (Dec 8, 2020)

fishfinger said:


> Alternate facts.
> 
> Does an Old Photo Show COVID Vax Creator as an Immigrant in Germany?


Aha. I thought it had that ring of convenient meme truth. 

Sad to say, though, that his contribution will make no more difference to the cause of migrants in the minds of those to whom immigration is such a dog whistle than all the achievements of immigrants who have gone before...


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 8, 2020)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 8, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 8, 2020)




----------



## Lurdan (Dec 8, 2020)

No fooling these brain surgeons.






From a thread by BBC journo archived here including the eagle-eyed observation that after getting the jab she made a masonic hand gesture.


----------



## existentialist (Dec 8, 2020)

Lurdan said:


> No fooling these brain surgeons.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


You don't mean...


----------



## prunus (Dec 8, 2020)

Lurdan said:


> No fooling these brain surgeons.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I grew up in Coventry and I’ve never met her


----------



## Anju (Dec 8, 2020)




----------



## Mation (Dec 9, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 242376


Manipulating her age, apparently!

Start small. Make her just a year younger. Lure her in. Then _BAM_ she's 126; 34; 273. For... reasons...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 9, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 9, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 242481


It would be brilliant to have snow like that, ideally for several months.


----------



## gosub (Dec 9, 2020)

Anti-vaxxers attack 90-year-old UK woman who was the first to receive COVID vaccine: ‘She died in 2008’ – Raw Story


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 9, 2020)




----------



## FridgeMagnet (Dec 9, 2020)

not sure if this one has been posted as it's quite old but whatever


----------



## editor (Dec 9, 2020)




----------



## William of Walworth (Dec 9, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> It would be brilliant to have snow like that, ideally for several months.



Here in boringly mild, wet and coastal Swansea, I'd be happy to have snow lie that just for the fortnight immediately *after* New Year -- we've had no significant snow, that is nothing more than wet, slushy, and sole-deep only , since 2010 

Not bothered about a White Xmas, it's a *White January* we really need -- an extention of Timeoffmas


----------



## MrSki (Dec 11, 2020)




----------



## LDC (Dec 11, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



That's fucking shit and has more than a hint of anti-vax about it. Where is it from?


----------



## MrSki (Dec 11, 2020)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> That's fucking shit and has more than a hint of anti-vax about it. Where is it from?


Can't remember now. I took it as a joke but can see how it might be seen differently. Will take it down if you want.


----------



## chilango (Dec 11, 2020)

looks like a cropped bit from one of Cold War Steve's


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 11, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 11, 2020)

MrSki said:


>


You need an editor


----------



## elbows (Dec 11, 2020)

chilango said:


> looks like a cropped bit from one of Cold War Steve's



He did something vaguely similar earlier this month but then felt the need to explain his art because of fear of antivax morons.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 12, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 12, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 14, 2020)




----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 14, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 243124


This morning, I coughed on a bit of saliva going down the wrong way and my boss came rushing out of the office and said if I coughed again, I’d have to go home - ‘this is your final warning!’ FFS


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 14, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> This morning, I coughed on a bit of saliva going down the wrong way and my boss came rushing out of the office and said if I coughed again, I’d have to go home - ‘this is your final warning!’ FFS



so how many more times have you coughed in the hope of getting sent home?


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 14, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> so how many more times have you coughed in the hope of getting sent home?


Zero - if I go home this time, I will still have to work and I hate the work I have to do at home.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 14, 2020)

Orang Utan said:


> Zero - if I go home this time, I will still have to work and I hate the work I have to do at home.


----------



## platinumsage (Dec 14, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 14, 2020)

platinumsage said:


>




and i wouldn't be surprised if reading is off the map in a few days


----------



## MrSki (Dec 15, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 15, 2020)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 15, 2020)




----------



## chilango (Dec 15, 2020)

Puddy_Tat said:


> and i wouldn't be surprised if reading is off the map in a few days



Nothing to do with Corona, mind.


----------



## MrSki (Dec 15, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Dec 15, 2020)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 15, 2020)

gosub said:


>


Definitely no increase in sodomy or masturbation for me.  

I feel cheated.  

Anyway, they entirely miss the obvious point that you can't suck cock with a mask on. They haven't thought this through.


----------



## prunus (Dec 15, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Definitely no increase in sodomy or masturbation for me.
> 
> I feel cheated.
> 
> Anyway, they entirely miss the obvious point that you can't suck cock with a mask on. They haven't thought this through.



Hence the increase in sodomy I believe.


----------



## AverageJoe (Dec 15, 2020)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Definitely no increase in sodomy or masturbation for me.
> 
> I feel cheated.
> 
> Anyway, they entirely miss the obvious point that you can't suck cock with a mask on.



Pretty sure I've seen a film somewhere that disproves this.... 

#badjoe #naughtyjoe


----------



## Yossarian (Dec 15, 2020)

Alt-text: "I believe in getting immunity the old-fashioned way: By letting a bat virus take control of my lungs and turn my face into a disgusting plague fountain while my immune system desperately Googles 'how to make spike protein antibodies'."


----------



## Raheem (Dec 15, 2020)

AverageJoe said:


> Pretty sure I've seen a film somewhere that disproves this....


----------



## MrSki (Dec 16, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 16, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 17, 2020)

Does anyone object if I merge this thread with this one as a lot of the content is being duplicated...


----------



## belboid (Dec 17, 2020)

Fine idea


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 17, 2020)

editor said:


> Does anyone object if I merge this thread with this one as a lot of the content is being duplicated...



This is mainly memes, whereas the other is mainly a discussion about loons.

Maybe just edit the title of this one to reflect that?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 17, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 17, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> This is mainly memes, whereas the other is mainly a discussion about loons.
> 
> Maybe just edit the title of this one to reflect that?


I'll try that. Thanks.


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 17, 2020)

On the Godalming faceache pages...


----------



## A380 (Dec 17, 2020)

Best yet...


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 17, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> On the Godalming faceache pages...
> 
> View attachment 243900


Tomorrow is going to be awkward ,I have 2 jobs in Godalming and knowing my history , Safe to say it's just as well Il be wearing a mask...


----------



## gosub (Dec 17, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> Tomorrow is going to be awkward ,I have 2 jobs in Godalming and knowing my history , Safe to say it's just as well Il be wearing a mask...



Waverley is tier 2.   Despite having a higher rate per 100k than Leeds which can't reduce to Tier 2 because 'localised tiering doesn't work'


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 17, 2020)

ruffneck23 said:


> Tomorrow is going to be awkward ,I have 2 jobs in Godalming and knowing my history , Safe to say it's just as well Il be wearing a mask...



Spoons is the only pub in town that’s open, and they’re doing a token system so no more than three drinks, so you’ll be fine  

I’d say meet up, but it’s BB1’s birthday and we’re off to the cinema.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 17, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> Spoons is the only pub in town that’s open, and they’re doing a token system so no more than three drinks, so you’ll be fine
> 
> I’d say meet up, but it’s BB1’s birthday and we’re off to the cinema.


 wont have time to stop , but cheers. I'm sure i'l be back


----------



## Sprocket. (Dec 17, 2020)

Link broken!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 17, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> Link broken!



Just 5 posts above, mate.


----------



## Sprocket. (Dec 17, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> Just 5 posts above, mate.


Wouldn’t play here so dumped.


----------



## blairsh (Dec 17, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> Link broken!


----------



## MrSki (Dec 18, 2020)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 18, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## killer b (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Dec 19, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> On the Godalming faceache pages...
> 
> View attachment 243900


Could anyone with photoshop software at hand kindly modify this to read tier 4 wankers?


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## Pingety Pong (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## petee (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## SpookyFrank (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 19, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## crossthebreeze (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 20, 2020)

I had just come to post this one -


----------



## The39thStep (Dec 20, 2020)

Tier 4 Christmas Party games, Number 1: Musical Chair.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 20, 2020)

This is fucking brilliant.


----------



## two sheds (Dec 20, 2020)

Alternative way to do it:



> Tourist: I saw your advert in the bolour supplement
> Bounder: The what?
> Tourist: The bolour supplement
> Bounder: The colour supplement?
> ...


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## hegley (Dec 20, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## dessiato (Dec 21, 2020)

On my FB today, not one of my friends I hasten to add. Was there ever a less aptly named person?



I've edited it to exclude the responses and remove my real name.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## Espresso (Dec 21, 2020)

Mr.Bishie said:


> View attachment 244586


I would like to like this a hundred times more than I can. I have no idea who Chen Weihua is but I love him.


----------



## Ax^ (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## T & P (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## Roadkill (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## 2hats (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 21, 2020)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 22, 2020)




----------



## Humberto (Dec 22, 2020)

Be lucky


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 22, 2020)




----------



## belboid (Dec 22, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 22, 2020)




----------



## The39thStep (Dec 22, 2020)




----------



## DotCommunist (Dec 22, 2020)

The39thStep said:


> View attachment 244809


any other labour leader would be 20 keirs.


----------



## A380 (Dec 22, 2020)




----------



## A380 (Dec 22, 2020)




----------



## iona (Dec 23, 2020)

Ok I'm bored of not getting the reference (but not enough to bother googling). Who the fuck is Chris Rea?


----------



## two sheds (Dec 23, 2020)

/subscribes to thread


----------



## 8115 (Dec 23, 2020)

iona said:


> Ok I'm bored of not getting the reference (but not enough to bother googling). Who the fuck is Chris Rea?


Classic Christmas song.


----------



## two sheds (Dec 23, 2020)

.


----------



## gosub (Dec 23, 2020)

iona said:


> Ok I'm bored of not getting the reference (but not enough to bother googling). Who the fuck is Chris Rea?


Lucky, Lucky you


----------



## iona (Dec 23, 2020)

gosub said:


> Lucky, Lucky you


I didn't actually play the video 8115 posted. Take it that was a wise decision then?


----------



## two sheds (Dec 23, 2020)

.


----------



## 8115 (Dec 23, 2020)

As Christmas songs go it's not that bad.


----------



## Wilf (Dec 23, 2020)

8115 said:


> As Christmas songs go it's not that bad.


Post reported.


----------



## iona (Dec 23, 2020)

Fuck what have I started


----------



## spanglechick (Dec 23, 2020)

No. I’m prepared to have this pointless fight.  While “Driving Home for Christmas” might be MOR / easy listening the lyrics do what many great Xmas songs do: they observe the warts and all shared experience stuff that builds to the overwhelming love families are usually able to share at xmas time.  See also: Tim Minchin’s White Wine in the Sun, or Wherever You Find Love it Feels Like Christmas by the Muppets (fight me - it _is_ the summer of your soul in December). 

Even in a normal year Rea’s song makes me cry with how much I’m looking forward to seeing my folks.


----------



## Weller (Dec 23, 2020)

spanglechick said:


> Even in a normal year Rea’s song makes me cry with how much I’m looking forward to seeing my folks.



He also did Road To Hell though which I usually play on my xmas drive home too   yeah either would do on a drive home this year  hes 70 been very ill but still just about playing live amazing blues rock guitarist much more than a bread and butter Christmas song writer and driving addict


----------



## petee (Dec 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 23, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 23, 2020)




----------



## Clair De Lune (Dec 23, 2020)

I've managed to get through this whole year without hearing someone say _Pandem _till yesterday_. Shudder. _


----------



## editor (Dec 23, 2020)




----------



## editor (Dec 23, 2020)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Dec 23, 2020)

View attachment trim.389246C5-2EC6-4889-8BC0-7A8FCAACE2A6.MOV


----------



## weepiper (Dec 23, 2020)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 23, 2020)




----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 23, 2020)

my best mate of 30 years has fully disappeared down the 5G/bill gates/qanon/Great Reset rabit hole. gone from a very mild mannered non political person, not particularly hot and bothered about anything really, probably very very slightly right of centre, to a raging, magical thinking lunatic. cut off contact months ago. very sad. all his friends are falling away. his marriage ended last year (not sure if its linked). this must be happening everywhere.


----------



## mx wcfc (Dec 24, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 26, 2020)




----------



## mx wcfc (Dec 27, 2020)




----------



## Pingety Pong (Dec 27, 2020)




----------



## elbows (Dec 30, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Dec 30, 2020)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Dec 30, 2020)

gosub said:


>


how about we tell him that what it's going to be  then just  tow it out to sea.

Actually get the rest of the usual suspects on it too.


----------



## brogdale (Dec 30, 2020)

Not a meme; what a bunch of cunts...


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Dec 30, 2020)

Surely the lizards would eat the insects though.


----------



## T & P (Dec 30, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 30, 2020)




----------



## Helen Back (Dec 30, 2020)

All around me are the closed down places
Contact tracers, covered faces.
Work From Home is now their daily routine
Going nowhere, going nowhere
The tiers are still infecting classes
Learn from home now, learn from home now.
Under lockdown I can't drown my sorrows
All the pubs closed, all the pubs closed

If I could get the vaccine
If I could get the jab
My chances of not dying will be the best I've ever had
But I find it hard to stay in
I find it hard to wait
With people throwing parties it's a very, very
Mad world….


----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 30, 2020)




----------



## quiet guy (Dec 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 246117


Let's hope he didn't have any predictions for next year


----------



## T & P (Dec 30, 2020)

gosub said:


>


And they could kill two birds with one stone and also reflect Brexit coming into effect by tugging that floating map to the middle of the Atlantic and letting it go adrift, battered by waves and covered in bird shit.


----------



## nogojones (Dec 30, 2020)

editor said:


>


----------



## DotCommunist (Dec 30, 2020)

Helen Back said:


> All around me are the closed down places
> Contact tracers, covered faces.
> Work From Home is now their daily routine
> Going nowhere, going nowhere
> ...


Tiers for Fears if I'm not mistaken


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 30, 2020)




----------



## AverageJoe (Dec 30, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 246117


 I read that "Kevin was a bit off" in the voice of Morgan Freeman.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 31, 2020)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 31, 2020)




----------



## Sprocket. (Dec 31, 2020)




----------



## existentialist (Dec 31, 2020)

Sprocket. said:


> View attachment 246249


Heavily.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 31, 2020)

gosub said:


>


That fella was a big auld noncey pedo though, wasn’t he?


----------



## MrSki (Dec 31, 2020)




----------



## gosub (Dec 31, 2020)

danny la rouge said:


> That fella was a big auld noncey pedo though, wasn’t he?



It turned out so, but irrc it was never a feature


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 31, 2020)




----------



## Epona (Dec 31, 2020)

MrSki said:


>



You missed the *Working From Home* one:


----------



## hitmouse (Dec 31, 2020)

Dunno if it counts as specifically corona-related, but:


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 31, 2020)

bellaozzydog said:


>



one of the best bits of satire/social comment i've seen recently. brilliant comment!


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 31, 2020)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 204634


sooooo good.


----------



## hegley (Jan 1, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 1, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 1, 2021)




----------



## petee (Jan 1, 2021)

if only


----------



## MrSki (Jan 1, 2021)




----------



## High Voltage (Jan 1, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


I could deal with all of that as long as that cunt isn't PM any longer... Or breathing for that matter


----------



## platinumsage (Jan 1, 2021)




----------



## StoneRoad (Jan 1, 2021)

A mate of mine's gone down a bit of a rabbit-hole ;

They reckoned that the wuhan virus was manufactured to allow the chinese to take over the world, in parallel to the economic takeover. 

I think I managed to dissuade them of that notion.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 1, 2021)

*Let us never forget the good old days!*

*When T1, T2, T3 & T4 were just terminals at Heathrow. *


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 2, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 2, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 2, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 2, 2021)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 246594


Brilliant


----------



## Roadkill (Jan 2, 2021)

Under a flyover in Hull, apparently...


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jan 2, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 3, 2021)

Shamelessly nicked from Twotter


How it started 


How it is going


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 3, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 3, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 246829


Probably have to know who Tony Hawk is I suspect.  I've got no idea.


----------



## existentialist (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Probably have to know who Tony Hawk is I suspect.  I've got no idea.


"Round Ireland With A Fridge"

R4-friendly gentle comedian type. Quite funny, I quite like him.

ETA: oh, hang on, that's Hawks.

Nope, I've never heard of him either. A quick Google suggests that he's something in the world of skateboarding, a world which remains closed to me.


----------



## hegley (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Probably have to know who Tony Hawk is I suspect.  I've got no idea.


The coolest middle aged man on the planet!


----------



## DotCommunist (Jan 3, 2021)

His name rings out because some of us played those playstation games to fucking death. Even looked good on the original playstation


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 3, 2021)




----------



## Clair De Lune (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Probably have to know who Tony Hawk is I suspect.  I've got no idea.


I fancied skaters in the 90s so I heard a lot about Tony Hawk


----------



## spitfire (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Probably have to know who Tony Hawk is I suspect.  I've got no idea.



He's a very famous, probably the most famous, skateboarder on the planet m'lud.

He also has a running joke going on about people telling him he looks just like Tony Hawk wherever he goes. This is one of the series of jokes in that vein. Very often he doesn't let on that he actually is Tony Hawk and they carry on with their lives totally oblivious to the fact they met him and not just someone who looks like him.











						Tony Hawk Keeps Tweeting When People Don't Recognize Him And It's Freaking Hilarious
					

Justice for Tony Hawk.




					www.buzzfeed.com


----------



## MrSki (Jan 3, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 3, 2021)

spitfire said:


> He's a very famous, probably the most famous, skateboarder on the planet m'lud.


I feel completely out of touch like my dad more often these days.


----------



## krink (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I feel completely out of touch like my dad more often these days.


He's been world famous since the 80s. He's one rad dude.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 3, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I feel completely out of touch like my dad more often these days.



Did your dad have a love affair with seagulls too?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 3, 2021)

krink said:


> He's been world famous since the 80s. He's one rad dude.


Obviously not given not everyone has heard of him.


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Obviously not given not everyone has heard of him.


Even I’ve heard of him, m’laud.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Even I’ve heard of him, m’laud.


Yes, but you like cheesecake so obviously can't be trusted.


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Yes, but you like cheesecake so obviously can't be trusted.


I bet you prefer strudel. Do you think more people like strudel or cheesecake?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I bet you prefer strudel. Do you think more people like strudel or cheesecake?


I've had strudel once, and have no particular view on it.  It's OK - unlike cheesecake.


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I've had strudel once, and have no particular view on it.  It's OK - unlike cheesecake.


So you won’t take the bet?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> So you won’t take the bet?


A bet on what?  That cheesecake is nasty?


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> A bet on what?  That cheesecake is nasty?


On whether more people prefer Mindy’s cheesecake or strudel.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 3, 2021)

on tweeter with 'i know the feeling'


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> On whether more people prefer Mindy’s cheesecake or strudel.


You're weird.


----------



## prunus (Jan 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You're weird.



The cheesecake is poisoned!


----------



## T & P (Jan 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Even I’ve heard of him, m’laud.


I’ve heard of him but only because of The Simpsons episode in which he feature. Not that many people outside North America who aren’t skaters would’ve ever heard of him otherwise.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 3, 2021)




----------



## brogdale (Jan 3, 2021)

There's too many Brian Bellends out there, but that's proper lol


----------



## MrSki (Jan 3, 2021)

Once again it is the Daily Star who says it as it is.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 3, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 4, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I feel completely out of touch like my dad more often these days.


Do you feel old and in the way?


----------



## Yossarian (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## TopCat (Jan 4, 2021)

I am fucking shitting myself with fucking anxiety this fucking morning.  
This is going to be a fucking grimmer than grim week.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 4, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 246995


Entirely superfluous - men obey that convention  without prompting


----------



## hegley (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Entirely superfluous - men obey that convention  without prompting



Not if the place is busy.


----------



## Mation (Jan 4, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I feel completely out of touch like my dad more often these days.


I'd never heard of him either.


----------



## fishfinger (Jan 4, 2021)

Mation said:


> I'd never heard of him either.


You're just not down with the kids like us youngsters


----------



## TopCat (Jan 4, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Entirely superfluous - men obey that convention  without prompting


It depends on the loo.


----------



## kabbes (Jan 4, 2021)

I’m not upset that people haven’t heard of Tony Hawk but I am upset that people haven’t heard of the Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater series that for the last 22 years have been wildly popular on the PlayStation, PlayStation 2, PlayStation 3, PlayStation 4, PlayStation Portable, Nintendo 64, GameCube, Wii, Game Boy Color, Game Boy Advance, Nintendo DS, Dreamcast, Xbox, Xbox 360, Xbox One, PC, Macintosh, N-Gage, iPhone and Android phones.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 4, 2021)

kabbes said:


> I’m not upset that people haven’t heard of Tony Hawk but I am upset that people haven’t heard of the Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater series that for the last 22 years have been wildly popular on the PlayStation, PlayStation 2, PlayStation 3, PlayStation 4, PlayStation Portable, Nintendo 64, GameCube, Wii, Game Boy Color, Game Boy Advance, Nintendo DS, Dreamcast, Xbox, Xbox 360, Xbox One, PC, Macintosh, N-Gage, iPhone and Android phones.


Skateboarding is annoying so I've never paid attention to it, so wouldn't consider plagying a game featuring an annoying activity.


----------



## kabbes (Jan 4, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Skateboarding is annoying so I've never paid attention to it, so wouldn't consider plagying a game featuring an annoying activity.


I find the whole idea of Strictly Come Dancing intensely irritating and have never watched 5 minutes of it but I’m still aware of its  existence


----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 4, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Not if the place is busy.


Even if it’s busy.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Even if it’s busy.


What & not sit down in a cubicle?


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 4, 2021)

MrSki said:


> What & not sit down in a cubicle?


I wait if I’m not busting


----------



## fishfinger (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Jan 4, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Even if it’s busy.


I must have been in a thousand toilets in a thousand different bars in countless towns and cities across three continents, and not a single time ever have I observed a single working urinal not being used if the toilets were busy and there were people waiting. Not a single time in my entire life, anywhere, ever.


----------



## kabbes (Jan 4, 2021)

Sometimes I’ll stand next to somebody at a urinal even if I don’t need to because I’m just not thinking about it


----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 4, 2021)

That's wild, tbh.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 4, 2021)

kabbes said:


> I find the whole idea of Strictly Come Dancing intensely irritating and have never watched 5 minutes of it but I’m still aware of its  existence


I'm also aware of skateboarding, but not the individuals who may partake in that annoying activity.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I'm also aware of skateboarding, but not the individuals who may partake in that annoying activity.


----------



## Espresso (Jan 4, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 247028


Well, even I know that's not Tony Hawk. Might be Stephen Seagull, though.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jan 4, 2021)

hegley said:


>




Always supposing that they know which axis is which


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 4, 2021)

The idiots have been fly posting my village with these


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 4, 2021)

T & P said:


> I must have been in a thousand toilets in a thousand different bars in countless towns and cities across three continents, and not a single time ever have I observed a single working urinal not being used if the toilets were busy and there were people waiting. Not a single time in my entire life, anywhere, ever.


You just haven’t noticed


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> The idiots have been fly posting my village with these
> View attachment 247043



Your village seems to be on a very steep hill.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)

No face masks.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## Ax^ (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## krink (Jan 4, 2021)

Tony Hawk once stood next to me at a urinal. He wasn't even peeing though, which is what made it memorable.


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 4, 2021)

Stage fright


----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 4, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


source?


----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> source?


Aunt May's Bajan Hot Pepper


----------



## MrSki (Jan 4, 2021)

CWS


----------



## A380 (Jan 4, 2021)

krink said:


> Tony Hawk once stood next to me at a urinal. He wasn't even peeing though, which is what made it memorable.


Did he show you his Bigflip?


----------



## Ax^ (Jan 4, 2021)

begin shouting at the telly in 3 minutes and remember the bingo card


----------



## Ax^ (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jan 4, 2021)

Just came to post that.

If he's still in charge of anything in 2035 then we truly are f**ked


----------



## Maggot (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 4, 2021)

Maggot said:


>


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 4, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 5, 2021)

A couple of hours late but


----------



## MrSki (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Jan 5, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


I'm going to go out on a limb and predict that Toby Young will continue to be a c0nt, for the rest of 2021, and until he ceases to exist.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 5, 2021)

existentialist said:


> I'm going to go out on a limb and predict that Toby Young will continue to be a c0nt, for the rest of 2021, and until he ceases to exist.



That's not a prediction, but a statement of fact.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jan 5, 2021)

Jay Rayner said it best.






He's also had a good savage of Alison Pearson to


----------



## zora (Jan 5, 2021)

.wrong thread


----------



## 2hats (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Jan 5, 2021)

__





						TikTok - Make Your Day
					

TikTok - trends start here. On a device or on the web, viewers can watch and discover millions of personalized short videos. Download the app to get started.




					vm.tiktok.com


----------



## MrSki (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## belboid (Jan 5, 2021)




----------



## two sheds (Jan 5, 2021)

wrong thread


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 5, 2021)

latest local news:
elbows  is bill gates
you've all been played!


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 6, 2021)




----------



## fishfinger (Jan 6, 2021)




----------



## Ax^ (Jan 6, 2021)

most admit this covid season 2 is just repeating last season's story lines


----------



## belboid (Jan 6, 2021)




----------



## magneze (Jan 6, 2021)

Ax^ said:


> most admit this covid season 2 is just repeating last season's story lines


Worked for Star Wars


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 6, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 6, 2021)




----------



## Treacle Toes (Jan 6, 2021)




----------



## sideboob (Jan 6, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jan 7, 2021)




----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 7, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> View attachment 247511


I'm going back to school!


----------



## MrSki (Jan 7, 2021)




----------



## prunus (Jan 7, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



I don’t think whoever made that knows what horticulture means.

Also I need my cuppa a lot earlier than 9.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 7, 2021)

prunus said:


> I don’t think whoever made that knows what horticulture means.
> 
> Also I need my cuppa a lot earlier than 9.


Depends if it home grown tea. I was thinking the same. Should be domestic science.


----------



## IC3D (Jan 7, 2021)

Who bleaches their bathroom?


----------



## A380 (Jan 7, 2021)

IC3D said:


> Who bleaches their bathroom?



I bleach my toilet regularly and use a 1:20 ish bleach on my bath and sink monthly ish.


----------



## T & P (Jan 7, 2021)

Spray bleach products are my friend for my bathroom sanitising requirements.


----------



## DotCommunist (Jan 7, 2021)

have to have bleach down the shitter or else its Unclean


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 7, 2021)

Bleach should be avoided if at all possible- horrible stuff


----------



## cybershot (Jan 7, 2021)

T & P said:


> Spray bleach products are my friend for my bathroom sanitising requirements.



I stopped using those, brings huge discolouration to stuff.


----------



## hegley (Jan 7, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 7, 2021)

hegley said:


> View attachment 247553


Shite in the woods?


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 7, 2021)

IC3D said:


> Who bleaches their bathroom?


Clean people.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 7, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Clean people.


Who don’t care about polluting the environment


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 7, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Shite in the woods?



I thought you were more into shitting on shed roofs.


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 7, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> I thought you were more into shitting on shed roofs.


It’s not a habit, it’s a bucket list goal.


----------



## girasol (Jan 7, 2021)

IC3D said:


> Who bleaches their bathroom?


I do, keeps the mould away (from tiles/grout/sealant) 😉 Without this, once a month, our bathroom would be covered in mould by now.


----------



## A380 (Jan 7, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 7, 2021)

A380 said:


> View attachment 247252


if i were a billionaire would be billboards across the land. not sure why these freaks, and there's legions and legions of them, are not getting more flack


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 7, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 7, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## dessiato (Jan 8, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


Nicking that.


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Jan 8, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


Ventilation, ventilation, ventilation. In all things.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2021)




----------



## HAL9000 (Jan 8, 2021)

MrSki said:


>











						Recall: Erectile Dysfunction, Depression Drugs Mixed Up
					

The recall involves the active ingredient in Viagra and an anti-depressant. They have been recalled because the drugs were "inadvertently packaged together" when they were bottled by a third-party vendor.




					www.webmd.com


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 9, 2021)

“Act like you’ve got the virus”.

Right, so drive to beauty spots. Get on trains with loads of people. That sort of thing?


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 11, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 11, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> View attachment 248273


love the inspirational background too. very good.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 11, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 11, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 11, 2021)

Newcastle has moved overnight. & Manchester Birmingham Stevenage. In fact the whole map is shite.


----------



## cloudyday (Jan 11, 2021)

Newcarlisle


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 11, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Newcastle has moved overnight. & Manchester Birmingham Stevenage. In fact the whole map is shite.


That’s the tracking app in the microchip. It actually physically moves whole towns that are encased in 5G domes.


----------



## Numbers (Jan 11, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 11, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 11, 2021)




----------



## josef1878 2.0 (Jan 12, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> View attachment 248273


----------



## editor (Jan 12, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jan 12, 2021)

I think her first sentence is best read out in the style of the fast show character Rowley Birkin - "...very, very, very rare..." As for the rest of it she can shove it.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 12, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> I think her first sentence is best read out in the style of the fast show character Rowley Birkin - "...very, very, very rare..." As for the rest of it she can shove it.


I would have gone with donald myself


----------



## two sheds (Jan 12, 2021)

and when they go home, they only ever meet children. They don't have parents or grandparents, ever.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 12, 2021)




----------



## editor (Jan 12, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jan 12, 2021)




----------



## fishfinger (Jan 12, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> View attachment 248591


Yeah, my vet just scans the microchip in my cats neck. That's what the vaccines are for!


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 12, 2021)

Yes it'll make it so much quicker and easier to get temperature readings in the future


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 12, 2021)

this could have been worded better


----------



## petee (Jan 13, 2021)

meanwhile, in the past ...


----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)

Watch the second one.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)

Darren Dutton has done some great video editing over the last year. This one is from the end of May.


----------



## two sheds (Jan 13, 2021)

MrSki said:


>




"It is of course safe in shops"

Not without a mask on it isn't you stupid fucking twat  

Can they not get the simplest thing right?


----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)

This one is from April.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## hitmouse (Jan 13, 2021)

Have we had this yet?


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 13, 2021)

MrSki said:


>





surely counts as food shopping and / or exercise?


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 13, 2021)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Jan 14, 2021)

Nicked from Reddit.


----------



## gosub (Jan 14, 2021)




----------



## hegley (Jan 14, 2021)




----------



## nyxx (Jan 14, 2021)

Funny how it’s always a woman in these take downs.
People do this and they’re thick as planks for it but so far I’ve seen as many men as women coming out with it. 



hegley said:


> View attachment 248886


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 14, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> Nicked from Reddit.


That's my life normally anyway, pandemic or no.


----------



## T & P (Jan 14, 2021)

nyxx said:


> Funny how it’s always a woman in these take downs.
> People do this and they’re thick as planks for it but so far I’ve seen as many men as women coming out with it.


Spot on. I’m amazed they didn’t name her as Karen as well. Standards are slipping.


----------



## Yossarian (Jan 15, 2021)




----------



## fishfinger (Jan 15, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 248998


If they just double the dose, then it will be twice as effective and twice as ineffective too.


----------



## Sprocket. (Jan 15, 2021)

View attachment IMG_1822.MP4


----------



## Espresso (Jan 15, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 15, 2021)

2nd one.


----------



## danski (Jan 15, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 15, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 16, 2021)




----------



## editor (Jan 16, 2021)

Here's a cheery new film:




2023, the COVID-23 virus has mutated and the world is in its fourth year of lockdown. Immune to the virus, a brave courier races against time to save the woman he loves from a quarantine camp. Starring KJ Apa, Sofia Carson, Alexandra Daddario and Demi Moore.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 16, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jan 16, 2021)




----------



## brogdale (Jan 17, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Jan 17, 2021)

editor said:


> Here's a cheery new film:
> 
> 
> 
> ...




I didn't know Covploitation was even a genre.


----------



## Badgers (Jan 17, 2021)




----------



## brogdale (Jan 17, 2021)

_Do the Math...

_


----------



## MrSki (Jan 17, 2021)




----------



## brogdale (Jan 17, 2021)

to CWS


----------



## Badgers (Jan 17, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 18, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 18, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 18, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 18, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 19, 2021)




----------



## killer b (Jan 19, 2021)

This from the 'terrible poems in local newspapers' Facebook group is magnificent


----------



## MrSki (Jan 19, 2021)




----------



## spanglechick (Jan 19, 2021)

Sprocket. said:


> View attachment 249083


Really? Domestic violence comedy??


----------



## platinumsage (Jan 19, 2021)




----------



## dessiato (Jan 19, 2021)

platinumsage said:


>



Pity that a lot of adults aren't this well "trained"


----------



## Indeliblelink (Jan 20, 2021)

This is  but also slightly 








						Kids 'replace sanitiser with superglue' and offer shoppers free squirts
					

One eager lad approached a shopper asking her if she would 'like a free pump' outside a Morrison's supermarket in Bradford, West Yorkshire - she nearly fell into his sticky trap before one of his pals let out a laugh




					www.mirror.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Jan 20, 2021)

The text the App sent Hancock.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 20, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 20, 2021)




----------



## tony.c (Jan 20, 2021)

😂


----------



## fishfinger (Jan 21, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 21, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 21, 2021)




----------



## blairsh (Jan 21, 2021)

Oops. Wrong thread


----------



## MrSki (Jan 21, 2021)

Sorry brought out the kid in me.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Jan 21, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 21, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 21, 2021)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Jan 21, 2021)




----------



## editor (Jan 22, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 22, 2021)




----------



## The39thStep (Jan 22, 2021)

Excuse the Sun but has anyone else experienced this ?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 22, 2021)

Soon may the vaccine come, to bring back festivals and fun.


----------



## blairsh (Jan 22, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Soon may the vaccine come, to bring back festivals and fun.



Christmas number1.


----------



## A380 (Jan 22, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 23, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Jan 23, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Soon may the vaccine come, to bring back festivals and fun.



"and drinking vodka in our wine to see how it would go"


----------



## quimcunx (Jan 23, 2021)

Mation said:


> "and drinking vodka in our wine to see how it would go"



From the look on his face 'not well'.


----------



## Yossarian (Jan 23, 2021)

One year ago...


----------



## MrSki (Jan 24, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 24, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 24, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 25, 2021)

One year and one day ago


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 25, 2021)

The Times cartoon today.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 25, 2021)




----------



## The39thStep (Jan 26, 2021)

Eugenics and the estate agent business


----------



## LDC (Jan 26, 2021)

The39thStep said:


> Eugenics and the estate agent business
> 
> View attachment 251467



Just covered this on Radio 4 news, cue furious back peddling and apologies from the estate agent.


----------



## Cerv (Jan 26, 2021)

could a brick through their window be good for the office? a chance to have a refurb.


----------



## elbows (Jan 26, 2021)

Cerv said:


> could a brick through their window be good for the office? a chance to have a refurb.



A unique opportunity to own a home that can be heated by burning all the dog turds that come through the letterbox.


----------



## editor (Jan 26, 2021)

The39thStep said:


> Eugenics and the estate agent business
> 
> View attachment 251467


We had one in Brixton too:: 









						Brixton’s new Avory Smith estate agents say that there are ‘big positives to take from COVID-19’
					

Now, we know that estate ages are an easy target to hate on in Brixton, given that their fundamental function is to profit from the housing crisis,  push up rents and house prices as much as they c…



					www.brixtonbuzz.com


----------



## T & P (Jan 26, 2021)

Cerv said:


> could a brick through their window be good for the office? a chance to have a refurb.


It'd be good for the soul, at any rate...


----------



## DaveCinzano (Jan 26, 2021)




----------



## Raheem (Jan 26, 2021)

Fred the Weatherman's gonna get an appeal out of Brown's carry-on.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 26, 2021)

So the landmark of 100 000 deaths has been passed & the only tory sacked is Frank fucking Lampard.


----------



## 8ball (Jan 26, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 250319



Amused me more than is reasonable.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 26, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Jan 26, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


'What's wrong with being sextony?'


----------



## Mation (Jan 26, 2021)

editor said:


> We had one in Brixton too::
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Christ. I saw that face (Luke Smith, not Christ) and couldn't read further for fear of damaging my computer. Ugh.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## dessiato (Jan 27, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



That is both desperately sad, and heartwarming. Sad because if the government had done something early enough they might not be dying, heartwarming because it shows how even in these extreme times there’s care and humanity.

And thank God for all the NHS workers for all they do, and are doing to make life better for the victims.

(and fuck Johnson and his ilk for letting it happen)


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## dessiato (Jan 27, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> View attachment 251630


If the cunt genuinely cared, really gave even a little of a fuck, he would do the decent thing and resign. (Preferably before going into the study with a bottle of whiskey, and a WW2, loaded, side arm that accidentally goes off when he looks down the barrel)


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 27, 2021)

dessiato said:


> and a WW2, loaded, side arm that accidentally goes off when he looks down the barrel)



he would miss


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## Indeliblelink (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## mojo pixy (Jan 27, 2021)

One hundred thousand dead.

At a very pessimistic moment last summer I thought to myself _one hundred thousand by the end of the year_, but I never, ever actually thought it would really, really happen. Not _really_.

Resign is not enough, he needs locking up. They need locking up.
Johnson, Cummings, Hancock, Patel, Gove and ''good cop'' Sunak.

I was going to find a picture of 100 000 people - by the way the population of Bath is around 90 000 so less than the dead from government mismanagement - but I want to feel angry, not sad, so





...and for their next trick .. Brexit Britain!


----------



## josef1878 2.0 (Jan 27, 2021)




----------



## mojo pixy (Jan 27, 2021)

20 000 (British) men died on the first day of the Battle of the Somme. That, five times over. for the same fucking reason. They Do Not Care.


----------



## Badgers (Jan 28, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 28, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 28, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 28, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 28, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 28, 2021)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 251724


Fucking idiot. “Stay at home, save lives, protect the NHS”.

Presumably he’s trying to kill people and overwhelm the NHS.


----------



## magneze (Jan 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Presumably he’s trying to kill people and overwhelm the NHS.


Looking back over the last year, there's strong evidence for this.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Jan 28, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> One hundred thousand dead.
> 
> At a very pessimistic moment last summer I thought to myself _one hundred thousand by the end of the year_, but I never, ever actually thought it would really, really happen. Not _really_.
> 
> ...


Apparently the actual figure is more like 120,000.


----------



## mojo pixy (Jan 28, 2021)

Well fwiw I finally found something to say. It's not high art but it's to the point. Anyone fancies putting some pictures to it, that would be cool.

Why are they still in charge? 
They should be behind bars.


----------



## MrSki (Jan 28, 2021)




----------



## Lurdan (Jan 28, 2021)

Wisconsin priest who livestreamed exorcisms aimed at rooting out voter fraud leaves diocese - usatoday



> A priest who livestreamed exorcisms aimed at rooting out what he, former President Donald Trump and some Trump supporters have claimed was widespread voting fraud in the presidential election has left a Roman Catholic diocese in Wisconsin. (...)





> Zuhlsdorf claimed he had permission from Madison Bishop Donald Hying to conduct the exorcisms. Hying said, however, that he didn't give Zuhlsdorf permission to conduct exorcisms related to “partisan political activity” but rather approved an exorcism for "alleviation from the scourge of the coronavirus pandemic.”


----------



## nogojones (Jan 28, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> One year ago...
> 
> View attachment 250849


----------



## InfoBurner (Jan 28, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 29, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 29, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 29, 2021)




----------



## Idris2002 (Jan 29, 2021)

Mrs Idris sent me this (possibly NSFW):



Why must she taunt me so?


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 29, 2021)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 29, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 251883



Today I was winding up the kids at work by saying this is how the test would be delivered. 😅


----------



## MrSki (Jan 29, 2021)

If this is true it is no surprise why the UK is getting priority.


----------



## magneze (Jan 29, 2021)

There's no evidence of vaccines being  diverted AFAIK.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 29, 2021)

magneze said:


> There's no evidence of vaccines being  diverted AFAIK.


someone said it on the internet, it must be true


----------



## magneze (Jan 29, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> someone said it on the internet, it must be true


QAnon, summarised.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 29, 2021)

magneze said:


> QAnon, summarised.


you can't can't summarise Qanon, you have to do your own resuch


----------



## two sheds (Jan 29, 2021)

or at least some such


----------



## gosub (Jan 30, 2021)

Also numbers I've seen are no where near as high as 700%, we already had a deal done and dusted a few months before November (mind you so did a few other EU states (all of which got subsumed into a larger deal that isn't realistically going to be delivered on time, and speaking of time the cost to the wider economy makes waiting longer for cheaper vaccines is a a false economy. 


Oh yeah and accidently announcing a border without talking to either of thee governments on either side of it, was utter muppetrey


----------



## nogojones (Jan 30, 2021)




----------



## editor (Jan 30, 2021)




----------



## editor (Jan 30, 2021)




----------



## petee (Jan 30, 2021)

Lurdan said:


> Wisconsin priest who livestreamed exorcisms aimed at rooting out voter fraud leaves diocese - usatoday



that guy has a long, long history.


----------



## quiet guy (Jan 30, 2021)




----------



## mx wcfc (Jan 30, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 31, 2021)

I’ve been on a zoom call with some old, old mates and I’m drunk as fuck. Had most of s bottle of whisky to myself.  Watching Marcella but can’t focus.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 31, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jan 31, 2021)

Why did I not think of this?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 31, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 31, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 31, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 252171


They should mandate testing at airports be done solely with anal swabs.  That'd be pretty effective at stopping idiots going on pointless trips.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 31, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> They should mandate testing at airports be done solely with anal swabs.  That'd be pretty effective at stopping idiots going on pointless trips.


Using this as the swab


----------



## Johnny Doe (Jan 31, 2021)

Near mine in North London


----------



## brogdale (Jan 31, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 31, 2021)

dessiato said:


> Using this as the swab
> View attachment 252186


Which end?  It matters.


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 31, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 31, 2021)




----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 31, 2021)

For anyone that has watched the fortitude TV series:
permafrost rhinoceros


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jan 31, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



That thing looks like it's made of uncooked richmond sausages.


----------



## Combustible (Feb 1, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 1, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> That thing looks like it's made of uncooked richmond sausages.


I have only had Richmond sausages once (never again) & they looked uncooked when they had been. Surprised they are allowed to be called sausages!


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Feb 1, 2021)

MrSki said:


> I have only had Richmond sausages once (never again) & they looked uncooked when they had been. Surprised they are allowed to be called sausages!


For me they scratch a particular itch. The blend of rusk, fat, pork, and salt (most likely in that order) makes for a moorish experience.
they always look anemic if you oven them  but if you give them time on a hot pan or under the grill they can get deep brown and a little crispy on the outside.*



*presumably the same is true of the doll


----------



## fishfinger (Feb 1, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Feb 1, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Feb 1, 2021)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Feb 2, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 2, 2021)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 252517


Third time lucky.


----------



## T & P (Feb 3, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 3, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Feb 3, 2021)




----------



## 2hats (Feb 3, 2021)

White cliffs have had enough. Appears they've decided to break lockdown and they're off. (Could equally be in some brexit thread, I guess).


----------



## Raheem (Feb 3, 2021)

2hats said:


> White cliffs have had enough. Appears they've decided to break lockdown and they're off. (Could equally be in some brexit thread, I guess).



Well, we were promised there would be no cliff-edge.


----------



## T & P (Feb 4, 2021)

Mmm... not to be picky but I don't think "a large part of the White Cliffs of Dover" is factually right. More like 0.02% of it, or thereabouts.

And how many centuries is it going to take for people to realise that you should film stuff in landscape not fucking portrait?


----------



## Elpenor (Feb 4, 2021)

Rare to see footage of the white cliffs of Dover not filmed at Seven Sisters


----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 4, 2021)

T & P said:


> Mmm... not to be picky but I don't think "a large part of the White Cliffs of Dover" is factually right. More like 0.02% of it, or thereabouts.


I’d argue that 0.02% of the White Cliffs is still something large.  I certainly wouldn’t want it landing on me.  

(Part and proportion aren’t strict identical synonyms).


----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 4, 2021)

Bits fall off all the time, we stopped at the top of a place near St Margarets Bay and of course being human we carefully looked over the edge, after walking away we heard a faint rumble and the cliff edge was noticeably a bit closer. 

Does work as a metaphor for Britain though.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Feb 4, 2021)

Bloody remoaner cliffs making their escape


----------



## Yossarian (Feb 4, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> Bloody remoaner cliffs making their escape



Or patriotic cliffs nobly sacrificing themselves to get Britain further away from Europe.


----------



## 2hats (Feb 4, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> Or patriotic cliffs nobly sacrificing themselves to get Britain further away from Europe.


Though, in the process, the population density will have gone up.


----------



## brogdale (Feb 4, 2021)

2hats said:


> Though, in the process, the population density will have gone up.


Which makes an assumption about the relative aggregate rates of erosion and deposition around the UK coastline.


----------



## 2hats (Feb 4, 2021)

brogdale said:


> Which makes an assumption about the relative aggregate rates of erosion and deposition around the UK coastline.


No, just a comment on that one event.


----------



## brogdale (Feb 4, 2021)

2hats said:


> No, just a comment on that one event.


 ...quite niche, this.


----------



## existentialist (Feb 4, 2021)

2hats said:


> Though, in the process, the population density will have gone up.


That's OK - it'll please the anti-immigration lot who keep going on about how there's "no room" here...


----------



## 2hats (Feb 4, 2021)

Something for everyone.


----------



## ice-is-forming (Feb 4, 2021)

Needs added Teresa May


----------



## editor (Feb 4, 2021)

This is gripping stuff from the Handforth Parish Council


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 5, 2021)

LINK


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 5, 2021)




----------



## elbows (Feb 5, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Feb 5, 2021)

Spoiler: NSFW


----------



## MrSki (Feb 6, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 6, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 6, 2021)

MrSki said:


>




Full version -


----------



## MrSki (Feb 6, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Feb 6, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


Can we vote to choose who should represent the UK for the 77 day silence?


----------



## T & P (Feb 6, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 253044



Will be initially not serving alcohol, if leaked reports to the Torygraph are to be believed. Sorry to be a party pooper.

On a more serious note, whereas that would be better than not open at all if the government insisted those were the only options, who the fuck is going to go to your typical non-gastro pub if you cannot have a proper drink? Unless you can bring your own booze discreetly and slip £20 each to the landlord for hosting punters, in which case I’d be all for it.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 7, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 7, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Feb 7, 2021)

If it was good enough for Baldrick...


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Feb 7, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> If it was good enough for Baldrick...



that's not credible.   i'm sure she would only have her turnips as god intended...


----------



## spitfire (Feb 7, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> If it was good enough for Baldrick...
> View attachment 253265



Well that's a turnip for the books.


----------



## fishfinger (Feb 8, 2021)




----------



## Epona (Feb 9, 2021)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 253288



To be fair, as someone who is hearing impaired and relies on lip-reading to understand what people are saying, a year of facemasks has been pretty horrible and isoloating.  People should still wear them though, however miserable it is for folks like me.


----------



## dessiato (Feb 9, 2021)

Epona said:


> To be fair, as someone who is hearing impaired and relies on lip-reading to understand what people are saying, a year of facemasks has been pretty horrible and isoloating.  People should still wear them though, however miserable it is for folks like me.


My sister has the same problem. She also has breathing problems. It is very difficult, but she still wears a mask.


----------



## Epona (Feb 9, 2021)

dessiato said:


> My sister has the same problem. She also has breathing problems. It is very difficult, but she still wears a mask.



I don't have a problem wearing a mask myself, but I cannot understand people who talk to me wearing a mask.  My OH has to pull his down to talk to me or tell me what other people are saying (which is allowed as I cannot understand otherwise).

I do find it difficult to realise that other people can understand me when I am wearing a mask though - I find myself pointing and gesticulating more as if I cannot be understood when wearing a mask!


----------



## MrSki (Feb 9, 2021)




----------



## IC3D (Feb 9, 2021)

Back of the net..


----------



## quiet guy (Feb 9, 2021)

I don't often listen to Jeremy Vine on Radio2 but at the start of today's show one of the researchers did a run down of the new ad that the government are pushing (Look him in the eye etc.) and turned it all around. It was quite a cutting anti Conservative party piece for Vine's show.


----------



## The39thStep (Feb 9, 2021)




----------



## Shechemite (Feb 10, 2021)

Iranian cleric bizarrely claims Coronavirus vaccine 'makes you gay'
					

Ayatollah Abbas Tabrizian, who rejects academic medicine, reportedly made the claims on messaging platform Telegram, warning people not to "go near" anyone who has had the jab




					www.mirror.co.uk


----------



## Yossarian (Feb 10, 2021)




----------



## rubbershoes (Feb 10, 2021)

MadeInBedlam said:


> Iranian cleric bizarrely claims Coronavirus vaccine 'makes you gay'
> 
> 
> Ayatollah Abbas Tabrizian, who rejects academic medicine, reportedly made the claims on messaging platform Telegram, warning people not to "go near" anyone who has had the jab
> ...



In that case, I'm gay. And so is my wife.


----------



## May Kasahara (Feb 10, 2021)

Snort.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 10, 2021)




----------



## dessiato (Feb 10, 2021)

MadeInBedlam said:


> Iranian cleric bizarrely claims Coronavirus vaccine 'makes you gay'
> 
> 
> Ayatollah Abbas Tabrizian, who rejects academic medicine, reportedly made the claims on messaging platform Telegram, warning people not to "go near" anyone who has had the jab
> ...


Let’s hope those extreme Christian fundamentalists don’t see this or they’ll be advocating it as a cure for “queerness”, due to the switching of sexuality.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 10, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Feb 10, 2021)

MadeInBedlam said:


> Iranian cleric bizarrely claims Coronavirus vaccine 'makes you gay'
> 
> 
> Ayatollah Abbas Tabrizian, who rejects academic medicine, reportedly made the claims on messaging platform Telegram, warning people not to "go near" anyone who has had the jab
> ...


It never ceases to amaze me that these idiots keep saying this about all sorts of things.


----------



## two sheds (Feb 10, 2021)

Mind you they're having the Cuban vaccine aren't they? Cubans renowned for having themselves a good time


----------



## dessiato (Feb 10, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> It never ceases to amaze me that these idiots keep saying this about all sorts of things.


I'm more amazed that some actually believe these dickheads


----------



## MrSki (Feb 10, 2021)

Sad to watch. There are still people who think that twat is doing a good job.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Feb 10, 2021)

dessiato said:


> I'm more amazed that some actually believe these dickheads


Gay people have enormous powers according to those weirdos - including causing earthquakes.  Quite impressive really.  

Searching for 'gays causing earthquakes' brings up tons of results, so it must be true.


----------



## two sheds (Feb 10, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Gay people have enormous powers according to those weirdos - including causing earthquakes.  Quite impressive really.
> 
> Searching for 'gays causing earthquakes' brings up tons of results, so it must be true.



Well it looks like they're sometimes right 



> Louisiana floods destroy home of Christian leader who says God sends natural disasters to punish gay people











						Flood destroys home of Christian lobbyist who preaches God sends natural disasters to punish gays
					

He has also claimed that paedophilia is a 'homosexual problem'




					www.independent.co.uk


----------



## MrSki (Feb 10, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 10, 2021)




----------



## mx wcfc (Feb 10, 2021)




----------



## mx wcfc (Feb 10, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Well it looks like they're sometimes right
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Sorry. derail, but


----------



## Mation (Feb 11, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


What's wrong with that?


----------



## petee (Feb 11, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 11, 2021)

Mation said:


> What's wrong with that?


Well where are you supposed to go to get tested if you have symptoms?


----------



## Mation (Feb 11, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Well where are you supposed to go to get tested if you have symptoms?


You're not supposed to. Well, not if you can get a home test sent to you. And some test centres are specifically for asymptomatic testing.


----------



## Badgers (Feb 11, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Well where are you supposed to go to get tested if you have symptoms?


Lateral Flow test centres are for people with no symptoms. The virus has an incubation period where infected people feel fine and as a result spread it around regardless of the lockdown rules. A lot of key workers use these regularly. 

If you have symptoms you isolate and request a test online 






						Get a PCR test to check if you have coronavirus (COVID-19)
					

Find out where to get a test to check if you have coronavirus (COVID-19).




					www.gov.uk


----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 12, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 12, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 12, 2021)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 12, 2021)

Logical endpoint for WFH clothing.


----------



## danski (Feb 12, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


>



Comfy and warm, that’s what.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Feb 12, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> Logical endpoint for WFH clothing.



dessiato - this would be perfect for you.


----------



## emanymton (Feb 12, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> dessiato - this would be perfect for you.


Nah, he'd wash it then try and dry it using a blowtorch while wearing it or something.


----------



## mystic pyjamas (Feb 12, 2021)

emanymton said:


> Nah, he'd wash it then try and dry it using a blowtorch while wearing it or something.


Reminds me of an iron I bought a couple of weeks ago. Reading the instructions it warns “ do not use appliance on clothes while wearing them”.


----------



## emanymton (Feb 12, 2021)

mystic pyjamas said:


> Reminds me of an iron I bought a couple of weeks ago. Reading the instructions it warns “ do not use appliance on clothes while wearing them”.


I'm pretty sure he has done that. Maybe he used that model.


----------



## existentialist (Feb 12, 2021)

emanymton said:


> I'm pretty sure he has done that. Maybe he used that model.


I use my toaster.


----------



## danski (Feb 12, 2021)

mystic pyjamas said:


> Reminds me of an iron I bought a couple of weeks ago. Reading the instructions it warns “ do not use appliance on clothes while wearing them”.


I had a girlfriend that “just tried to get a crease out” of the arm of a T-shirt whilst wearing it. Silly sausage.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 12, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 12, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 254061


*woman yelling at cat


----------



## dessiato (Feb 12, 2021)

emanymton said:


> I'm pretty sure he has done that. Maybe he used that model.


I have, it was the jet of steam that hurt.


----------



## Mation (Feb 12, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 254061


No.


----------



## Mation (Feb 12, 2021)

If you really can't be arsed to iron a thing you're already wearing but have 'even a bit too creased for me' shame, then the way to go is a spritz of water (by spritz, I mean flicking your fingers from tap to clothing), pulling the fabric taught, and then blasting it for a minute with a hairdryer. I've, erm...heard it works a treat


----------



## Orang Utan (Feb 12, 2021)

Or just wear it until the creases disappear - takes an hour or two


----------



## Orang Utan (Feb 12, 2021)

Mation said:


> If you really can't be arsed to iron a thing you're already wearing but have 'even a bit too creased for me' shame, then the way to go is a spritz of water (by spritz, I mean flicking your fingers from tap to clothing), pulling the fabric taught, and then blasting it for a minute with a hairdryer. I've, erm...heard it works a treat


Or hang it in your bathroom and have a hot shower


----------



## Mation (Feb 12, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Or hang it in your bathroom and have a hot shower


Mostly, these days, I just wear stuff that doesn't crease much. Hopefully not drenched in formaldehyde


----------



## Orang Utan (Feb 12, 2021)

Mation said:


> Mostly, these days, I just wear stuff that doesn't crease much. Hopefully not drenched in formaldehyde


I usually pay someone else to do it (though not right now) And once used to take all 5 work shirts to the dry cleaner on a Friday and pick them up all pristine on a Sunday.


----------



## dessiato (Feb 12, 2021)

Mation said:


> If you really can't be arsed to iron a thing you're already wearing but have 'even a bit too creased for me' shame, then the way to go is a spritz of water (by spritz, I mean flicking your fingers from tap to clothing), pulling the fabric taught, and then blasting it for a minute with a hairdryer. I've, erm...heard it works a treat


It works very well, in my experience.


----------



## Petcha (Feb 13, 2021)

I don't really get this one. A friend sent it to me and thinks it's hilarious.  Dave Chapelle in a crowded small comedy venue the other night with no social distancing, no masks, blowing cigarette smoke all over the crowd, bragging about how he's just recovered from Covid. A black role model in the country with the highest number of deaths. 

Am I missing the punchline - (I can't be arsed watching the whole thing tbh)


----------



## Mation (Feb 13, 2021)

Petcha said:


> I don't really get this one. A friend sent it to me and thinks it's hilarious.  Dave Chapelle in a crowded small comedy venue the other night with no social distancing, no masks, blowing cigarette smoke all over the crowd, bragging about how he's just recovered from Covid. A black role model in the country with the highest number of deaths.
> 
> Am I missing the punchline - (I can't be arsed watching the whole thing tbh)



What makes him a black role model?


----------



## Petcha (Feb 13, 2021)

He's a very famous and high profile black man. In a country where a large majority of covid deaths are in the African American community. Irresponsible at best?

If you havent actually watched it, he basically claims Covid is nothing. Despite just having it himself.

Then compares himself to Edward Snowden for pointing this conspiracy out. I'm not quite sure if I'm just missing the joke.


----------



## IC3D (Feb 13, 2021)

Hes a famous comedian, that's different to a role model. If he really just recovered from covid then he can enjoy a fag and mask free night as far as I'm conserned.


----------



## Mation (Feb 13, 2021)

Petcha said:


> He's a very famous and high profile black man. In a country where a large majority of covid deaths are in the African American community. Irresponsible at best?
> 
> If you havent actually watched it, he basically claims Covid is nothing. Despite just having it himself.
> 
> Then compares himself to Edward Snowden for pointing this conspiracy out. I'm not quite sure if I'm just missing the joke.


Are all very famous people role models?


----------



## Petcha (Feb 13, 2021)

IC3D said:


> Hes a famous comedian, that's different to a role model. If he really just recovered from covid then he can enjoy a fag and mask free night as far as I'm conserned.



You don't really get how a virus works do you? He might be safe himself, he also might still be carrying. People cackling away at how he nailed Covid while he blows smokes over them in a tiny BBQ joint. Well. And yes, I do think a lot of people in the African American community would look up to him. He could easily have taken the opportunituy and his platform to tell people to mask up.


----------



## Petcha (Feb 13, 2021)

Mation said:


> Are all very famous people role models?



It's a subjective term, but yes. A lot are. And in the US, this guy is very very famous. Particularly amongst the most at risk demographic.


----------



## IC3D (Feb 13, 2021)

I don't think you get what a role model is


----------



## Mation (Feb 13, 2021)

Petcha said:


> It's a subjective term, but yes. A lot are. And in the US, this guy is very very famous. Particularly amongst the most at risk demographic.


He's not exactly known for being reasonable and sensible, though, is he? 

I haven't watched it, but I imagine he's being a fucking idiot.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 13, 2021)




----------



## fishfinger (Feb 13, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 13, 2021)

Petcha said:


> I don't really get this one. A friend sent it to me and thinks it's hilarious.  Dave Chapelle in a crowded small comedy venue the other night with no social distancing, no masks, blowing cigarette smoke all over the crowd, bragging about how he's just recovered from Covid. A black role model in the country with the highest number of deaths.
> 
> Am I missing the punchline - (I can't be arsed watching the whole thing tbh)



I don’t get a lot of American stand up.  It’s just some guy talking.  It was the same with Amazing Mrs Masel. I was bored stupid by the stand up sequences.  

I have to admit I wasn’t familiar with Chappell.  Looking at wiki it seems he’s been around a long time.  I don’t think I need to see any more of his oeuvre.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 13, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Feb 13, 2021)

Mation said:


> He's not exactly known for being reasonable and sensible, though, is he?
> 
> I haven't watched it, but I imagine he's being a fucking idiot.


Celebrities falling over themselves to look edgy. No one is boss of them. They march to their own creative free thinking drum. Raised eye brow at all the brainwashed sheep whilst they just wearily get on with things. 

Which roughly translates to "selfish arsehole" in regards covid. Try as I might I don't know of another way to translate it. Selfish cunt maybe?


----------



## A380 (Feb 13, 2021)




----------



## Graymalkin (Feb 14, 2021)

A bit region specific but it sums up the sentiment in the areas in Ontario that just came out of lockdown.

<blockquote class="reddit-card" data-card-created="1613281523"><a href="">lord of the rings but its ontario ending lockdown</a> from <a href="r/ontario">r/ontario</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//embed.redditmedia.com/widgets/platform.js" charset="UTF-8"></script>


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Feb 14, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 14, 2021)

Why is so much PPE ending up in the sea, WTF is wrong with people?


----------



## chilango (Feb 14, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 254320
> 
> Why is so much PPE ending up in the sea, WTF is wrong with people?



street>sewer>river>sea or similar I guess.

The amount of disposable masks on the streets is horrific. 

In Portugal I saw graffiti on the streets next to drainage grills saying "the sea starts here".


----------



## DotCommunist (Feb 14, 2021)

chilango said:


> street>sewer>river>sea or similar I guess.
> 
> The amount of disposable masks on the streets is horrific.
> 
> In Portugal I saw graffiti on the streets next to drainage grills saying "the sea starts here".


Sous les pavés, la plage


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 14, 2021)

chilango said:


> The amount of disposable masks on the streets is horrific.



I've not noticed that around here, where have you seen it?


----------



## two sheds (Feb 14, 2021)

chilango said:


> street>sewer>river>sea or similar I guess.
> 
> The amount of disposable masks on the streets is horrific.
> 
> In Portugal I saw graffiti on the streets next to drainage grills saying "the sea starts here".



Private Eye cartoon ooo 25 years ago or more showed a toilet with a sign above it "to the sea".


----------



## krink (Feb 14, 2021)

The amount of disposable masks in the street is like an indicator of how many people are wearing them. Last summer they were everywhere, they died off in autumn and now they're back on the rise. Where my mam lives they are the most frequent item of litter you see - she lives near the hospital and a busy doctor's surgery/health centre. I have found them blown into in my garden and I live far from any health centre. This isn't funny so here's a picture of me coming out of lockdown.


----------



## chilango (Feb 14, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> I've not noticed that around here, where have you seen it?


Reading. My street, and most others I've walked down recently.


----------



## chilango (Feb 14, 2021)

chilango said:


> Reading. My street, and most others I've walked down recently.



If I remember I'll take pictures when I go for my walk later...


----------



## BigMoaner (Feb 14, 2021)

Londoners are spending weekends in ice cold bins as they can’t go wild swimming
					

Would you get in a paddling pool at -2C?




					www.mylondon.news


----------



## Mation (Feb 14, 2021)

Perhaps we need mask/hazardous waste bins on the streets* like dog shit bins. It's possible that people don't know what to do with the ones they take off. Urgh don't want it on me, but can I put it in a normal bin? Perhaps people are having a little 'dont know what to do with it but if I leave it here, someone who does will come along and deal with it' panic.

(I put mine in the haz bin at work, or forget and take them home to have my panic.)

* Weird times r us.


----------



## mx wcfc (Feb 14, 2021)

Mation said:


> Perhaps we need mask/hazardous waste bins on the streets* like dog shit bins. It's possible that people don't know what to do with the ones they take off. Urgh don't want it on me, but can I put it in a normal bin? Perhaps people are having a little 'dont know what to do with it but if I leave it here, someone who does will come along and deal with it' panic.
> 
> (I put mine in the haz bin at work, or forget and take them home to have my panic.)
> 
> * Weird times r us.


I think most people just drop them accidentally. With the strings on them, it's easy enough.


----------



## two sheds (Feb 14, 2021)

I pick litter on our road, there's not a huge amount of it but I'd feel very iffy about picking up a discarded mask. Once they're down there you'd imagine they'd stay


----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 14, 2021)

Mation said:


> Perhaps we need mask/hazardous waste bins on the streets* like dog shit bins. It's possible that people don't know what to do with the ones they take off. Urgh don't want it on me, but can I put it in a normal bin? Perhaps people are having a little 'dont know what to do with it but if I leave it here, someone who does will come along and deal with it' panic.
> 
> (I put mine in the haz bin at work, or forget and take them home to have my panic.)
> 
> * Weird times r us.



This is very charitable but honestly based on the average amount of trash in a British street it's no change from normal and probably just people being unthinking gits.


----------



## Mation (Feb 14, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> This is very charitable but honestly based on the average amount of trash in a British street it's no change from normal and probably just people being unthinking gits.


That's it, though. Unthinking, not malicious. I get really annoyed, but then think about how crap I am at some stuff until it's pointed out or made easy.

(I'm trying really hard not to be furious at the people at work who leave their discarded masks on top of my locker!)


----------



## ska invita (Feb 14, 2021)

Mation said:


> What's wrong with that?


when i went to a car park test i had to fill out an online form saying YES i had symptoms. without saying yes i couldnt get a test


----------



## Mation (Feb 14, 2021)

ska invita said:


> when i went to a car park test i had to fill out an online form saying YES i had symptoms. without saying yes i couldnt get a test


Wow! I hadn't heard of that.

Did the staff have proper ppe?


----------



## ska invita (Feb 14, 2021)

Mation said:


> Wow! I hadn't heard of that.
> 
> Did the staff have proper ppe?


yeah it was good - also you crack open car window an inch to get the bits, and vice versa to drop them off - no contact at all


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Feb 14, 2021)

ska invita said:


> when i went to a car park test i had to fill out an online form saying YES i had symptoms. without saying yes i couldnt get a test





Mation said:


> Wow! I hadn't heard of that.



as of december (when i had a bug of some sort that wasn't covid) i got a test (did it by post as didn't feel up to driving 15 miles to the nearest one) and i think at that time you could only get a test if you had symptoms

there are now some test centres locally where you can go without symptoms if you're a key worker (and are advised to go fairly regularly)

is it possible that the latter sort don't want people with symptoms?


----------



## Mation (Feb 14, 2021)

ska invita said:


> yeah it was good - also you crack open car window an inch to get the bits, and vice versa to drop them off - no contact at all


Sorry, I know this is serious, but it does sound a little like dogging


----------



## mx wcfc (Feb 14, 2021)

ska invita said:


> yeah it was good - also you crack open car window an inch to get the bits, and vice versa to drop them off - no contact at all


That was my experience.  Mrs mx tested positive, so I lied to the app and went to get a test too.  It was well organised in terms of social distancing/ppe etc, but I didn't envy the young people doing it.  Though fair play to them.


----------



## ska invita (Feb 14, 2021)

Mation said:


> Sorry, I know this is serious, but it does sound a little like dogging


i find you have to open the window a few more inches


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 15, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Feb 15, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 254489


facts tho! it'll prob be about 6th or 7th question i reckon


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 15, 2021)




----------



## petee (Feb 15, 2021)




----------



## ginger_syn (Feb 15, 2021)

petee said:


>



🤮


----------



## HAL9000 (Feb 15, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 254490



4.5 volt zap is unlikely to do anything, what's needed is something like this...


----------



## Badgers (Feb 16, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Feb 16, 2021)

HAL9000 said:


> 4.5 volt zap is unlikely to do anything, what's needed is something like this...



Poor dog.  I remember holding an electric fence (with my fingers to be clear) when I was a kid, and it wasn't a pleasant experience when the jolt of power came through - getting that through your dick wouldn't be good.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 16, 2021)

HAL9000 said:


> 4.5 volt zap is unlikely to do anything, what's needed is something like this...




I remember you posting that on the bandwidth thread, and I replied -  I did that over 40 years ago, went to piss in a hedge, and hadn't noticed the electric fence wire around the field, that was embedded in the fucking hedge, ouchy.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Feb 16, 2021)

Bonkers









						Anti-Maskers Have Weaponized Disney Princesses
					

Freedom Princess is an anti-mask campaign run by a woman who owns a legitimate princess-for-hire business in Canada.




					www.vice.com


----------



## ruffneck23 (Feb 17, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 18, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Feb 18, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



Outstanding


----------



## MrSki (Feb 18, 2021)

Badgers said:


> Outstanding


Wait for the campaign to get it to number one. For once it is actually a good tune!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 18, 2021)

> A man wanted by police handed himself in so he wouldn't have to spend more time in lockdown with the people he lived with.
> 
> Officers said the man was wanted for recall to prison and gave himself up at Burgess Hill police station on Wednesday afternoon to get some "peace and quiet".
> 
> ...














						Man hands himself in as he'd rather be in jail than spend any longer with people at home during lockdown
					

The suspect said he wanted to go prison to get some "peace and quiet" from those he shares his home with.




					news.sky.com


----------



## Calamity1971 (Feb 19, 2021)

Apols if this has been done already. 6.2cm 
'6.2cm-tall man' offered priority Covid vaccine after NHS blunder


----------



## Petcha (Feb 19, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Man hands himself in as he'd rather be in jail than spend any longer with people at home during lockdown
> 
> 
> The suspect said he wanted to go prison to get some "peace and quiet" from those he shares his home with.
> ...



The daily mash would be pleased with that


----------



## rubbershoes (Feb 19, 2021)

Calamity1971 said:


> Apols if this has been done already. 6.2cm
> '6.2cm-tall man' offered priority Covid vaccine after NHS blunder



Who do  you think I am?  Fucking Noddy?


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

MrSki said:


>




Interesting. This is about to exemplify that nowadays without a video, a song by itself is literally invisible.



mojo pixy said:


> ""




I suppose because of SM .. that's Social Media not Sado-Masochism 

IMO every band in the country ought to be making songs like these right now.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> Interesting. This is about to exemplify that nowadays without a video, a song by itself is literally invisible.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


In this case it is not about the video but it is about a well written tune. Your soundcloud link sounds like a distorted version of discharge & is not easy listening regardless of the merits of the lyrics. 

Video does help rather than looking at an orange sound wave.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 19, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Who do  you think I am?  Fucking Noddy?



Classic


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

MrSki said:


> In this case it is not about the video but it is about a well written tune. Your soundcloud link sounds like a distorted version of discharge & is not easy listening regardless of the merits of the lyrics.
> 
> Video does help rather than looking at an orange sound wave.



That's just a punk -vs- ska thing and it's a matter of taste. Having a video counts for a lot.
IMO there should be funk, soul, R&B, hip hop, indie, metal versions of songs on the same subject.

Thanks for the feedback anyway.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> That's just a punk -vs- ska thing and it's a matter of taste. Having a video counts for a lot.
> Thanks for the feedback anyway.


A lot of punk tunes are tuneful as well as the lyrics having a message. Think of the Clash & Guns of Brixton or Armageddon time.


----------



## editor (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> That's just a punk -vs- ska thing and it's a matter of taste. Having a video counts for a lot.
> IMO there should be funk, soul, R&B, hip hop, indie, metal versions of songs on the same subject.
> 
> Thanks for the feedback anyway.


Decent production would help too. It's very muddy.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

OK. It's a hobby, I made a song in my spare room, because I was angry.

My point is there should be hundreds of songs on the same theme. The fuckers need shaming out of office.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

MrSki said:


> A lot of punk tunes are tuneful as well as the lyrics having a message. Think of the Clash & Guns of Brixton or Armageddon time.




The clash is pop music, not punk. Or, more specifically, it's punk music for people who think punk music is just a load of noise. Or poorly produced, too political, too angry, or 'muddy' lol


----------



## MrSki (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> The clash is pop music, not punk.


Not in the early days. Agreed they did mellow in their latter years but were one of the founders of the UK punk scene. I don't know how old you are but The Damned, Clash & the Pistols were the founding fathers.



> View all
> 
> 
> '*The Anarchy Tour*' of *1976*, one of the most famous *tours* in rock 'n' roll history, almost never happened. The historical *tour* in question featured some of punk's forefathers in fury, The Clash, Johnny Thunder and The Heartbreakers and The Damned, but there was one band on everyone's lips: the Sex Pistols.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

Right, but punk isn't The Damned, the Clash and the Sex Pistols. They were all pop groups.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> Right, but punk isn't The Damned, the Clash and the Sex Pistols. They were all pop groups.


If you say so. What do you consider to be 'punk'?


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

That's a massive question for possibly another thread, but whatever punk _is_, it doesn't involve being on Top of the Pops. Ever.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> That's a massive question for possibly another thread, but whatever punk _is_, it doesn't involve being on Top of the Pops. Ever.


Like the Clash?


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

The Clash were on TotP




and even Legs & Co did a routine for Bank Robber




1978, same year as the Clash did ^Tommy Gun^, Crass released The Feeding of the 5000 that contains the song Punk is Dead

Yes that's right, punk is dead
It's just another cheap product for the consumers' head
Bubblegum rock on plastic transistors
Schoolboy sedition backed by big-time promoters
CBS promote the Clash
Ain't for revolution, it's just for cash
Punk became a fashion just like hippy used to be
Ain't got a thing to do with you or me
Movements are systems and systems kill
Movements are expressions of the public will
Punk became a movement cos we all felt lost
Leaders sold out and now we all pay the cost
Punk narcissism was a social napalm
Steve Jones started doing real harm
Preaching revolution, anarchy and change
Sucked from the system that had given him his name
Well I'm tired of staring through shit-stained glass
Tired of staring up a superstar's arse
I've got an arse and crap and a name
I'm just waiting for my fifteen minutes fame
Steven Jones, you're napalm
If you're so pretty vacant, why do you smarm?
Patti Smith, you're napalm, you write with your hand
But it's Rimbaud's arm
And me, yes, I, do I want to burn?
Is there something I can learn?
Do I need a business man to promote my angle
Can I resist the carrots that fame and fortune dangle
I see the velvet zippies in their bondage gear
The social elite with safety pins in their ear
I watch and understand that it don't mean a thing
The scorpions might attack, but the systems stole the sting
Punk is dead
Punk is dead
Punk is dead
Punk is dead

Crass are not the be-all-and-end-all of punk by a long way, but they at least had a clue.


----------



## belboid (Feb 19, 2021)

Aah, Penny Rimbaud, the COVID conspiraloon.   As punk as Brewdog


----------



## MrSki (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> The Clash were on TotP
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Watch the video of the clash playing TOTP & you will see at the bottom that they refused to do TOTP & that is a video from Something Else  

I doubt they had much input to who Legs & Co danced to. I expect it was more likely to be the record company.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Watch the video of the clash playing TOTP & you will see at the bottom that they refused to do TOTP & that is a video from Something Else



OK fair enough. 

Still, turning up the guitars and spiking the hair isn't all it takes to be punk and I never saw The Clash as punk. Punk-pop maybe, like Sham 69. Later on Green Day took up the same kind of space.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

belboid said:


> Aah, Penny Rimbaud, the COVID conspiraloon.   As punk as Brewdog



1978 was 43 years ago. It is possible to have been sound at one time, and have fallen down rabbit holes since then. As much as I don't like it, PR is hardly alone in that.
Edit - Also fwiw, Penny Rimbaud isn't doing the vocals on that song, it's Steve Ignorant.


----------



## editor (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> Right, but punk isn't The Damned, the Clash and the Sex Pistols. They were all pop groups.


Sorry, who's elected you as the authority on punk here?


----------



## editor (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> The Clash were on TotP
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Punk was dead by 1978 so I'm not sure what your point is. And I'm not sure why you think a (then) 35 year old ex-public schoolboy is the most qualified authority on punk either.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

editor said:


> Sorry, who's elected you as the authority on punk here?



Of course as the site owner, you're the authority on everything. Nobody else could possibly have any experience that qualifies them for anything. 

Feel free btw to twist this into whatever you like. Proprietor's rights innit. All our words belong to you once posted or something.


----------



## editor (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> Of course as the site owner, you're the authority on everything. Nobody else could possibly have any experience that qualifies them for anything.
> 
> Feel free btw to twist this into whatever you like. Proprietor's rights innit. All our words belong to you once posted or something.


You're deceitfully inventing that whole argument again that my role as a mod here is somehow preventing you from articulating or posting a response to your daft claims.

It's an underhand and cowardly way to act.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

editor said:


> You're deceitfully inventing that whole argument again that my role as a mod here is somehow preventing you from articulating or posting a response to your daft claims.



Not at all, I'm just saying that you tend to quote then re-write posters' posts when you object to what they say or you feel like needling them a little. You do it a lot. Occasionally you even push posters far enough that they get thread or temp bans. It's a pattern of behaviour, especially on the politics threads.



editor said:


> It's an underhand and cowardly way to act.


----------



## editor (Feb 19, 2021)

mojo pixy said:


> Occasionally you even push posters far enough that they get thread or temp bans. It's a pattern of behaviour, especially on the politics threads.


Could you list, say, three recent examples of this 'pattern of behaviour' from the politics forum please? Thanks. Oh, and kindly take this to the feedback forum where mods will be pleased to independently attend to your accusations.


----------



## mojo pixy (Feb 19, 2021)

editor said:


> Could you list, say, three recent examples of this 'pattern of behaviour' from the politics forum please? Thanks. Oh, and kindly take this to the feedback forum where mods will be pleased to independently attend to your accusations.



It wouldn't matter if I did. You'd find a way to deny it, deflect it, or insult me for bringing it up. And if you want a chat in the feedback forum, I suggest making an apology thread there which other posters you've done it to can post on. This exchange is over from my PoV.


----------



## editor (Feb 19, 2021)

Let's get back on track FFS


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Feb 19, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> Bonkers
> 
> 
> 
> ...


It's this kind of crap that is going to kill cosplay.
Copyright holders will come down on this like a ton of bricks.


----------



## editor (Feb 19, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Feb 19, 2021)

Ah but, but, but... They didn't have a tory cronie who needed to be handed a contract to do fuck all.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 20, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 20, 2021)




----------



## Doodler (Feb 20, 2021)

Someone somewhere must be trying to convince others that Covid-19 is not actually a virus but an antibody type in the Gaian planetary immune system.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 21, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 21, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 21, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 21, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 21, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 21, 2021)

belboid said:


> Aah, Penny Rimbaud, the COVID conspiraloon.   As punk as Brewdog


Is this true? I'd like to see the evidence. It wouldn't be the first time he's come out with some crazy stuff.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Feb 21, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> Is this true? I'd like to see the evidence. It wouldn't be the first time he's come out with some crazy stuff.


he has certainly posted some antivax connected stuff on his twitter last week


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 21, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> he has certainly posted some antivax connected stuff on his twitter last week


That is unfortunate but I'm not too surprised.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Feb 21, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> That is unfortunate but I'm not too surprised.


It's put me off my plan to go visit Dial House some day :/


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 21, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> It's put me off my plan to go visit Dial House some day :/


I haven't felt right about Penny since I saw a clip of him online stating sincerely that he witnessed people in Africa magically flying through the air. Can't find the video now though.

I notice he's done some poetry recently that seems to be anti-lockdown, it's on YouTube but I couldn't be arsed watching the whole thing. It's a short film he made with someone else, it goes on for about 24 minutes.

Bloody hippies.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 21, 2021)

Sorry I know it is old but how fucking dare they? Just remember what was done to NHS & care workers.

And yes Morgan is a cunt.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 21, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> he has certainly posted some antivax connected stuff on his twitter last week


Having seen his tweets I can't say I can really decipher what he is saying, although it does appear to be anti-science and he does appear to have gone up his own arse (though I think that happened some time ago). I was actually watching a discussion between him and some other guy earlier (it went on for about an hour and a half), it's on YouTube. He questioned reality, science and calling people cranks. So I'm not surprised if he's come out with anti-vaccine and anti-lockdown stuff.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Feb 21, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> Having seen his tweets I can't say I can really decipher what he is saying, although it does appear to be anti-science and he does appear to have gone up his own arse (though I think that happened some time ago). I was actually watching a discussion between him and some other guy earlier (it went on for about an hour and half), it's on YouTube. He questioned reality, science and calling people cranks. So I'm not surprised if he's come out with anti-vaccine and anti-lockdown stuff.


an hour and a half?
you have the patience of a saint
/me writes to pontif about Saint Count Cuckula
I can get all the reality stuff (did way too many psychedelics in my time ;-) and love PKD)


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 22, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> an hour and a half?
> you have the patience of a saint
> /me writes to pontif about Saint Count Cuckula
> I can get all the reality stuff (did way too many psychedelics in my time ;-) and love PKD)


What's PKD?


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Feb 22, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> What's PKD?


Philip K Dick


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 22, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 22, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> Philip K Dick


Ah right. I've read Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep. A great book.


----------



## belboid (Feb 22, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> Is this true? I'd like to see the evidence. It wouldn't be the first time he's come out with some crazy stuff.


As quoted in the COVID conspiraloon thread:



killer b said:


> Sigh.
> 
> View attachment 254726


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Feb 22, 2021)

belboid said:


> As quoted in the COVID conspiraloon thread:


Oh dear. Well there you go.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 22, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Feb 22, 2021)

how did you get that pic of me?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 22, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> how did you get that pic of me?



It's on your facebook page.


----------



## editor (Feb 22, 2021)




----------



## editor (Feb 22, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 23, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 23, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 23, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 23, 2021)




----------



## blairsh (Feb 23, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Feb 23, 2021)




----------



## zahir (Feb 24, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 24, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 24, 2021)

OMG, Sky News has just shown a picture of Johnson sitting in a classroom with other kids, surreal.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 24, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 24, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 24, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 255889


We’ve always known this is how we'll win.  “_Ulla ulla ulla ulla”._


----------



## MrSki (Feb 24, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> OMG, Sky News has just shown a picture of Johnson sitting in a classroom with other kids, surreal.


I was surprised he was not in school uniform to add to his dressing up box.


----------



## T & P (Feb 24, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Feb 24, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 255888


I'm glad to see the 'human shark' they'd just fished out has quickly become a valuable member of society


----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 24, 2021)

T & P said:


> I'm glad to see the 'human shark' they'd just fished out has quickly become a valuable member of society
> 
> View attachment 255914



MP for Uxbridge material there


----------



## platinumsage (Feb 24, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 24, 2021)

Last page.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 24, 2021)




----------



## ddraig (Feb 24, 2021)

Spotted on walk this afternoon


----------



## MrSki (Feb 25, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Feb 25, 2021)

I think I now understand how the MRNA vaccine works.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Feb 25, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> I think I now understand how the MRNA vaccine works.
> 
> View attachment 256004


That is a good analogy.


----------



## magneze (Feb 25, 2021)

I only just got new glasses and I cannot read that.


----------



## Yossarian (Feb 25, 2021)

magneze said:


> I only just got new glasses and I cannot read that.


----------



## stdP (Feb 25, 2021)

Perhaps the forum cache is resizing it but direct links to the comic and PNG:








						mRNA Vaccine
					






					xkcd.com
				





			https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/mrna_vaccine.png
		


I get that it's a star wars reference of some sort but I think the punchline sailed over my head once again. ExplainXKCD had this to say:


> The analogy is that the immune system (the Rebel Alliance) figures out a way to attach to the spike proteins (attack the benign Death Star) made by the mRNA vaccine; the immune system's antibodies (Rebel planners) now "know" how to recognize and destroy things that have these spike proteins — including SARS-CoV-2 virus particles (real, dangerous Death Stars). Hence, when the vaccinated Cueball approaches White Hat, who is maskless, coughing, and presumably sick with COVID-19, Cueball's immune system is able to destroy dangerous SARS-CoV-2 virus particles because it knows about the virus's spike proteins. This is represented by Cueball not experiencing any suffering from COVID-19, and he goes on his way whistling merrily, perhaps to the tune of The Throne Room/End Title (from the ceremony celebrating the destruction of the Death Star).


----------



## T & P (Feb 25, 2021)

magneze said:


> I only just got new glasses and I cannot read that.


Deteriorating eyesight: another side effect of the microchip vaccines


----------



## existentialist (Feb 25, 2021)

magneze said:


> I only just got new glasses and I cannot read that.











						mRNA Vaccine
					






					xkcd.com


----------



## quiet guy (Feb 25, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Feb 25, 2021)

Hancock goes to a town & asks the residents what they need. "We've two big needs" said a resident, "we have a hospital but no doctors". Hancock gets out his phone, talks for a while & says "the doctors will arrive tomorrow, what else?" The resident says "we have no phone signal"


----------



## mx wcfc (Feb 25, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Feb 25, 2021)




----------



## William of Walworth (Feb 25, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> I think *I now understand how the MRNA vaccine works*.
> 
> View attachment 256004




Fuck knows how anyone's *eyesight* does though, for that!


----------



## William of Walworth (Feb 25, 2021)

stdP said:


> Perhaps the forum cache is resizing it but direct links to the comic and PNG:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Ahhh!!, OK!!!!

I get it now


----------



## Epona (Feb 26, 2021)

mx wcfc said:


> View attachment 256152



I do like that, but to be fair the first smallpox vaccine was developed in 1796, so it did take a while...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 26, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 26, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Feb 26, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 256190


Reminded me of this:


----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 26, 2021)




----------



## prunus (Feb 26, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 256218



Is there a vaccine for protection from Showaddywaddy now?  Where do I sign up?


----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 26, 2021)

prunus said:


> Is there a vaccine for protection from Showaddywaddy now?  Where do I sign up?


You inoculate yourself by listening to the red and blue greatest hits albums.


----------



## two sheds (Feb 26, 2021)

She should do another one: "Think of other people - pay tax".

Or possibly: "give back all the land you've taken".


----------



## Yossarian (Feb 26, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Feb 26, 2021)

two sheds said:


> She should do another one: "Think of other people - pay tax".
> 
> Or possibly: "give back all the land you've taken".


Or Die.


----------



## 8ball (Feb 26, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> I think I now understand how the MRNA vaccine works.



That's the Pfizer one covered.  Got a cartoon for the AZ one?

(Though I think it works if the blueprints are stored on a floppy disk that gets delivered by a reformed burglar in an envelope containing a note telling you to change the file extension on the file, open it in Paint, and fax it to the construction team)*

* - maybe this explains why there seem to be more significant side effects reported.


----------



## prunus (Feb 26, 2021)

8ball said:


> That's the Pfizer one covered.  Got a cartoon for the AZ one?
> 
> (Though I think it works if the blueprints are stored on a floppy disk that gets delivered by a reformed burglar in an envelope containing a note telling you to change the file extension on the file, open it in Paint, and fax it to the construction team)*
> 
> * - maybe this explains why there seem to be more significant side effects reported.



Basically yes. Although it’s more like the plans are delivered by a brother of one of the stormtroopers, who’d never really been into the empire stuff.  And sometimes when you build the thing off the plan it collapses spontaneously and is no use.  The rest of it is right though - MS Paint etc.


----------



## existentialist (Feb 26, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Feb 26, 2021)

existentialist said:


> View attachment 256257


I disagree with anti-vaxers but I think a mile is a bit much for social distancing.


----------



## eatmorecheese (Feb 26, 2021)

.


----------



## brogdale (Feb 27, 2021)




----------



## William of Walworth (Feb 28, 2021)

I suspect that most/all half-sensible musicians can't bloody wait to be getting back on tour.

Ideally without Ian Brown pushing for a support-slot  

And now those musicians and their managers, etc., *know* (once live gigs and fests resume), how best to ensure his absence!


----------



## MrSki (Feb 28, 2021)

Full version now out & rising in the charts.


----------



## Badgers (Feb 28, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Full version now out & rising in the charts.



Paid for this and hope it gets some attention


----------



## cupid_stunt (Feb 28, 2021)




----------



## Mr.Bishie (Mar 1, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 1, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Mar 1, 2021)




----------



## gosub (Mar 1, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 2, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 2, 2021)

One way road to beer - The lockdown countdown to freedom!
					

From beer in the park with one friend, to beer anywhere with everyone... Here's the definitive countdown to the four stages on the 'one-way road to freedom'.




					onewayroadtobeer.com


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 3, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 4, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 6, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Mar 6, 2021)




----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 6, 2021)

Fucking hell, that's a roster of mediocrity isn't it?


----------



## dessiato (Mar 6, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


And which teachers/heads are cosignatories to the letter? You know, the people who do the job, and know what they're talking about?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2021)

Not surprised to see Hartley Brewer on that list, she's a complete twat when it comes to covid.

Actually, she's a complete twat, full fucking stop.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Mar 6, 2021)

So are Hurst & Madeley.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 6, 2021)

dessiato said:


> And which teachers/heads are cosignatories to the letter? You know, the people who do the job, and know what they're talking about?


They probably found one ex-teacher who now runs a private tutoring company.


----------



## William of Walworth (Mar 6, 2021)

May Kasahara said:


> Fucking hell, that's a roster of mediocrity isn't it?



I've not even _heard_ of some of them!

'Celebrity'-endorsement fail .....


----------



## Lurdan (Mar 6, 2021)

Text of the letter with full roll call of shitheads is here

You will doubtless be astonished to learn it also includes
Laurence Fox
Allison Pearson
James Delingpole
Richard Tice
Peter Hitchens

I note however, it also includes the deeply unpleasant 'journalists'/conspiraloon grifters Sonia Poulton and Anna Brees. They're from a much lower depth of the conspiraloon swamp IMO.


----------



## belboid (Mar 6, 2021)

Omg, Fox lists his profession as ‘politician’.  Lee Hurst as ‘not allowed to work comedian’


----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 6, 2021)

Quite surprised not to see Emma Kenny on there.


----------



## belboid (Mar 6, 2021)

The one person working n education - Exclusive: Headmaster becomes first to break ranks and defy Government guidance on face masks in classroom


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 6, 2021)

May Kasahara said:


> Quite surprised not to see Emma Kenny on there.


Who?


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 6, 2021)

Lurdan said:


> Text of the letter with full roll call of shitheads is here
> 
> You will doubtless be astonished to learn it also includes
> Laurence Fox
> ...


Shall we have fun signing this with daft names or will that be counterproductive?


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 6, 2021)

Lurdan said:


> Text of the letter with full roll call of shitheads is here
> 
> You will doubtless be astonished to learn it also includes
> Laurence Fox
> ...


Gillian Mckeith                      “Television Presenter, Nutritionist and Author” and fake.


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 6, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Gillian Mckeith                      “Television Presenter, Nutritionist and Author” and fake.


Professional Shit Examiner


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 6, 2021)

I just signed as Jimmy Savile - Dead Celebrity Nonce


----------



## Clair De Lune (Mar 6, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Gillian Mckeith                      “Television Presenter, Nutritionist and Author” and fake.


That's the poo lady isn't it?


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 6, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Shall we have fun signing this with daft names or will that be counterproductive?


Done. Donald Trump - True President of America.


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 6, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> That's the poo lady isn't it?


She must be jonesing for a gander at other people’s turds


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 6, 2021)

There’s no verification email so I’ve signed again as Dick Weighsaton - porn actor.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2021)

'David Icke - Professional loon' has been added.

I used an e-mail address at mail.com for verification.


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 6, 2021)

Alan Partridge - Broadcaster and covidsceptic


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 6, 2021)

The website doesn't seem to auto-update with these fake entries, I've a feeling they are being manually checked to decide if they are listed under 'Public Figures' or 'Medics and Academics'.


----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 6, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Who?



TV psychologist (as in, has a psychology degree, not a registered clinical psych or any other kind of protected title) and Covid denier - all the usual anti-mask, anti-vax, "this isn't democracy!!!1!1!" bollocks.


----------



## spitfire (Mar 6, 2021)

Signed as Bellendus Maximus, Roman Centurion.

and

Grfiter McGriftface


----------



## existentialist (Mar 6, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Gillian Mckeith                      “Television Presenter, Nutritionist and Author” and fake.


You missed "opportunist attention seeker"


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 6, 2021)

existentialist said:


> You missed "opportunist attention seeker"


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 6, 2021)

She hadn’t eaten a poo for a whole week tbf


----------



## T & P (Mar 6, 2021)




----------



## William of Walworth (Mar 6, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> There’s no verification email so I’ve signed again as Dick Weighsaton - porn actor.



Photo-evidence in 'Naked Urbanites' thread, or it didn't happen


----------



## HAL9000 (Mar 6, 2021)

Some german words

_Coronamutationsgebiet_



Spoiler: Answer



is an area where coronavirus mutations are widespread




_Geisterveranstaltung_



Spoiler: Answer



(ghost event) is an event with no people in attendance, usually sports.



_Autokonzert_.



Spoiler: Answer



Live music is allowed, provided the audience remains in their cars, at an



_Gesichtskondom_



Spoiler: Answer



a "face condom"



_"Kontaktbeschränkungen_



Spoiler: Answer



contact restrictions



_Ausgehbeschränkung_



Spoiler: Answer



going out restrictions



Source


----------



## belboid (Mar 7, 2021)

HAL9000 said:


> Some german words
> _Gesichtskondom_
> 
> 
> ...


That was one of three l managed to translate myself.  Although I did think ‘it can’t actually mean _that_’


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 7, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 7, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Mar 7, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 10, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 10, 2021)

Just had this whatsapp message from my brother...

I have just got back from my first jab. I am now getting inundated with special holiday offers for Cyrus from May or when I have had my second jab, I guess the 5g tracking chip must be working.


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 10, 2021)




----------



## two sheds (Mar 10, 2021)

Fucking hell








						Department of Health did £90,000,000 deal with firm listed in Chinese hotel room
					

The Government has been accused of signing off ‘secretive big money deals’ for PPE while overlooking British companies.




					metro.co.uk
				





> The Department of Health (DHSC) signed two PPE deals worth more than £90 million with a state-backed Chinese firm listed at a hotel room in Beijing, newly-published documents show.
> 
> The heavily-redacted contracts have emerged as the Government is accused of signing off ‘secretive big money deals’ with foreign firms despite British companies having tendered their services.
> 
> Matt Hancock’s department spent an estimated £9.5 billion on vital PPE equipment during the first wave as it tried to rush supplies to the NHS supply chain, according to Tussell market intelligence.



I checked because I didn't understand it - Hancock saw a notice in a hotel room that he'd happened to stay at?  But no the registered address I presume.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 10, 2021)

But £37 billion for test and trace that didn't work is the best one - that's around a third of the whole NHS budget pissed up the wall  1% for nurses because we can't afford any more  cunts once again


----------



## magneze (Mar 10, 2021)

NASA landed on Mars for less.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 10, 2021)

A mere $2.7 billion  I did see that comparison but didn't really believe it. Mind you SERCO wasn't running the NASA programme so that's more believable.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Mar 10, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Gillian Mckeith                      “Television Presenter, Nutritionist and Author” and fake.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Mar 11, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 12, 2021)




----------



## krink (Mar 12, 2021)

Stunning fail


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 12, 2021)

krink said:


> Stunning fail
> 
> View attachment 258396


He needs to show his workings


----------



## krink (Mar 12, 2021)

I mean, I know they're absolute thieves but 37 trillion* would be incredible even by Tory standards

*i think


----------



## belboid (Mar 12, 2021)

krink said:


> I mean, I know they're absolute thieves but 37 trillion* would be incredible even by Tory standards
> 
> *i think


£34 trillion, you're a damned sight closer than he was!   Even before we get into the whole question of what age someone becomes an adult in his view (it appears to be at about two days old)


----------



## prunus (Mar 12, 2021)

krink said:


> Stunning fail
> 
> View attachment 258396



edit: I think the point has been made


----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 12, 2021)

Is it an African or European billion?


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 12, 2021)

krink said:


> Stunning fail
> 
> View attachment 258396


His first degree was in economics so he must be rightz


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 12, 2021)

Think Tommy must be using Hancock's calculator to work that one out


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 12, 2021)




----------



## William of Walworth (Mar 12, 2021)

krink said:


> Stunning fail
> 
> View attachment 258396



If *each adult was given £500K!!!!* to stay indoors for six months, I think a fair few might never go back to work at the end of that contract-specified  period .....  

This Universal Basic Income stuff is all very well, but .....


----------



## Thora (Mar 12, 2021)

We'd all starve to death once we realised we can't eat £500k anyway.


----------



## William of Walworth (Mar 12, 2021)

Thora said:


> We'd all starve to death once we realised we can't eat £500k anyway.



I'm pretty certain that with that amount of *FREE and RETIREMENT-ENABLING CASH!!*,there'd be 'ways around' that issue though


----------



## kabbes (Mar 12, 2021)

It has not it has been adequately spelt out that £36bn is more like £500 each, not £500k.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 13, 2021)

Not, statistically speaking, if you donate it to the tory party in return for covid related contracts


----------



## Yossarian (Mar 14, 2021)




----------



## Epona (Mar 14, 2021)

kabbes said:


> It has not it has been adequately spelt out that £36bn is more like £500 each, not £500k.



Depends upon whether one is using outdated Imperial definition of "billion" though - of course I would expect that of right wing little Englander types who can't keep up with the current modern usage of "billion".  You're talking about people who would probably relish a return of guineas as currency and workhouses for the poor, take delight in fake stories about curved cucumbers being illegal and want to stick to lbs and oz - don't expect them to understand these newfangled measurements.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 14, 2021)

Epona said:


> Depends upon whether one is using outdated Imperial definition of "billion" though - of course I would expect that of right wing little Englander types who can't keep up with the current modern usage of "billion".  You're talking about people who would probably relish a return of guineas as currency and workhouses for the poor, don't expect them to understand these newfangled measurements.


When Serco publish that the cost has been 39bn, they mean 39 thousand million.  If this so-called Imperial billion was ever actually used in finance, I have no idea, but it certainly hasn’t been used since at least the 1950s.  I really doubt it was ever used in science.  So I don’t know why people still get confused.  It’s like a collective delusion amongst those who don’t actually have to deal in billions.


----------



## Epona (Mar 14, 2021)

kabbes said:


> When Serco publish that the cost has been 39bn, they mean 39 thousand million.  If this so-called Imperial billion was ever actually used in finance, I have no idea, but it certainly hasn’t been used since at least the 1950s.  I really doubt it was ever used in science.  So I don’t know why people still get confused.  It’s like a collective delusion amongst those who don’t actually have to deal in billions.



Yeah I am not disagreeing with you though so don't take high dudgeon with me - I'm pointing out the origin of the 500k comment, and I suggest that it's not that the person who made it can't do maths, it is that they are harking back (as these types often do) to a mythical past where measurements were different.


----------



## Epona (Mar 14, 2021)

I feel I am not explaining my point very well here so am going to try again.

I think that the person who made that comment about each adult getting 500k knows full well what a modern billion means, but they are making what they see as a "point" about the UK having adopted modern measurements at any point (alongside still wishing most of the globe was coloured pink) and the comment isn't all about the cost of the pointless Serco contract as it is equally about the adoption of what is seen in that commenter's view as an Americanised definition of "billion" by the UK government.  I expect they still insist on buying fruit and veg in lbs and oz rather than kilos (because changing measurement standards is bad and a loss of "our culture"- in their eyes).

I hope that has clarified what I meant - I don't think that comment originated in stupidity (well at least not stupidity about the mathematics) or a miscalculation/inability to do maths, rather a calculated reactionary nationalist/imperialist bent.


----------



## kabbes (Mar 14, 2021)

They were referring to what SERCO has spent.  So no, it was a plain error that comes from not knowing what a billion has been for the last 50 years at least.


----------



## Epona (Mar 14, 2021)

I think my interpretation actually makes them look worse...


----------



## 2hats (Mar 14, 2021)

kabbes said:


> They were referring to what SERCO has spent.  So no, it was a plain error that comes from not knowing what a billion has been for the last 50 years at least.


Wilson announced in late 1974 that the government would adopt the US/French ('short scale') meaning of a billion going forward (arising from international MKS/SI common technical usage) and Healy duly used that in the 1975 budget.


----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 14, 2021)

2hats said:


> Wilson announced in late 1974 that the government would adopt the US/French ('short scale') meaning of billion (arising from international MKS/SI common technical usage) going forward and Healy duly used that in the 1975 budget.



Hardly needs saying. Children learn this in yr 1.


----------



## Epona (Mar 14, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Hardly needs saying. Children learn this in yr 1.



I am not old enough to have been taught the old definition of billions, but I am old enough to have been taught feet, inches, pounds, ounces etc.  And we didn't have anything called "yr 1" when I started school.

I am not defending the fuckwit who said it - some of you seem to think I am - but I think it's more damaging to brush it off as stupidity (anyone can be stupid or uneducated but that doesn't make them right wing) rather than see it as part of an ongoing right wing cultural agenda to hark back to "the good old days".  50 years ago is within living memory for a significant part of the population.


----------



## Mation (Mar 14, 2021)

kabbes said:


> They were referring to what SERCO has spent.  So no, it was a plain error that comes from not knowing what a billion has been for the last 50 years at least.


I was first taught the old definition and genuinely still think of a thousand million as an American billion 

You've no idea whether they had the old definition in mind or not, so I can't see the point in _insisting_ that it was a plain error. Might have been. Might not.

Is there something else we can get cross about, now, please?


----------



## kabbes (Mar 14, 2021)

Mation said:


> You've no idea whether they had the old definition in mind or not, so I can't see the point in _insisting_ that it was a plain error. Might have been. Might not.


I do though.  They referred to how much SERCO has spent on track and trace, which is £36bn.  There is no financial record in the world that doesn’t mean £36 thousand million by £36bn, so if SERCO say they spent £36bn then that can only mean £36 thousand million.

Honestly, there is zero uncertainty or controversy in this.  I challenge you to find a single set of accounts over the last 40 years anywhere in the world that refers to a billion as anything but a thousand million.


----------



## krink (Mar 14, 2021)

I wish I hadn't posted the bloody thing now


----------



## Mation (Mar 14, 2021)

kabbes said:


> I do though.  They referred to how much SERCO has spent on track and trace, which is £36bn.  There is no financial record in the world that doesn’t mean £36 thousand million by £36bn, so if SERCO say they spent £36bn then that can only mean £36 thousand million.
> 
> Honestly, there is zero uncertainty or controversy in this.  I challenge you to find a single set of accounts over the last 40 years anywhere in the world that refers to a billion as anything but a thousand million.


My apologies. We can indeed assume that SERCO meant an American billion, but that wasn't the bit I was querying.


----------



## two sheds (Mar 14, 2021)

krink said:


> I wish I hadn't posted the bloody thing now


I missed the Harold Wilson edict so I've always been confused by "billion" - cleared up for me now so ta:


----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 14, 2021)




----------



## krink (Mar 15, 2021)

two sheds said:


> I missed the Harold Wilson edict so I've always been confused by "billion" - cleared up for me now so ta:


I'm sure The Harold Wilson Edict were a late 70s mod revival band


----------



## chilango (Mar 15, 2021)

Fortunately I went to school in the 1980s so my Marxist teachers were too busy reading Derrida and Foucault to me to trouble themselves with defining "billion".


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 17, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> I have a bloody zoom meeting every other Wednesday, with a 7.30 am start, so I am normally just in a t-shirt & boxers, and if I need to get up, I'll just kill the camera.
> 
> This morning I was clearly not paying attention and hit the unmute button instead of stop video, and flashed my boxers.



Not sure which is the worst..


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 17, 2021)




----------



## Aladdin (Mar 19, 2021)

Mario Rosenstock takes off Christy Moore's song Lisdoonvarna...


Lockdown Harder 😁


----------



## William of Walworth (Mar 19, 2021)

Emailed to me :




			
				A Friend said:
			
		

> * Champions League, Quarter Final Draw *
> Moderna  v  Pfizer BioNTech
> Sputnik  v  Zydus Cadila
> Janssen  v  Astra Zeneca
> Novavax  v  Bacillus Calmette-Guerin



That joke is going viral, apparantly ...


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Mar 19, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Hardly needs saying. Children learn this in yr 1.


Not quite



> In Year 1, children will:
> 
> 
> need to count forwards and backwards up to 100
> ...


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Mar 19, 2021)

Sugar Kane said:


> Mario Rosenstock takes off Christy Moore's song Lisdoonvarna...
> 
> 
> Lockdown Harder 😁



That is painfully accurate.  At least the spoken bits.  The singing is a tiny bit off but still excelent.
(One of the few gigs I have been to is a christy moore one  back either late 90s or early 2000s)


----------



## two sheds (Mar 20, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Not quite


Nothing about Harold Wilson - what is our education system teaching nowadays?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 20, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 20, 2021)




----------



## Aladdin (Mar 20, 2021)

We have a 5km travel limit at the moment in Ireland.









						Cork garda left speechless after hearing one woman's reason for going beyond 5km
					

This garda wasn't expecting that response anyway




					www.corkbeo.ie
				




Angela Brickley is a dairy farmer from Laois who was in Cork on Tuesday making an important delivery from her business.

Angela was stopped by a garda at a covid checkpoint in Innishannon and when she was asked why she was beyond her 5km she had a very reasonable and unusual response.

She tweeted "Doing deliveries yesterday and was stopped at a Garda checkpoint in Cork. Are you local? No. Why are you out? I am delivering bull semen to dairy farmers.

"You are doing what?? I repeat what I said, her reply was "you couldn't make that up".


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Mar 21, 2021)




----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 21, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 259637



They didn't want to use the switch that does exactly that?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 21, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Mar 21, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Mar 22, 2021)

Mation said:


> I was first taught the old definition and genuinely still think of a thousand million as an American billion



I will go to my grave reading out 1,000,000,000 as one milliard, dammit


----------



## DaveCinzano (Mar 22, 2021)

two sheds said:


> I missed the Harold Wilson edict


What were you doing that day instead that was so important, eh?


----------



## Artaxerxes (Mar 22, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Mar 22, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 23, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Mar 23, 2021)




----------



## Clair De Lune (Mar 23, 2021)

Badgers said:


>



And drink in our pants and get fatter.


----------



## editor (Mar 23, 2021)




----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 23, 2021)

editor said:


> View attachment 259980



You don't see this in the msm


----------



## William of Walworth (Mar 24, 2021)

editor said:


> View attachment 259980



I actually mentioned the post-vaccine bus factor, in a post just before the weekend


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Mar 24, 2021)

William of Walworth said:


> I actually mentioned the post-vaccine bus factor, in a post just before the weekend



the conspiracy has been a long time coming


----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 24, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 24, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> View attachment 260127


hancock behind that?


----------



## BCBlues (Mar 24, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> hancock behind that?



No, all the spelling is correct


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 25, 2021)

Get ready for Monday...


----------



## elbows (Mar 25, 2021)




----------



## Johnny Doe (Mar 27, 2021)

Who knew Germ Theory denial was a thing?


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Mar 27, 2021)

Harry Smiles said:


> Who knew Germ Theory denial was a thing?


me, though I wish I didn't

It's been around in anti-vaxx spheres for a while, but there are a lot of people who say that covid simply doesn't exist at all now, so not surprising to see that spread to "actually germs don't cause illness full stop".


----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 28, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Mar 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 260675


I send that to a group chat I’m on. My brother’s partner replied:

“Too soon. 😡”


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Mar 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I send that to a group chat I’m on. My brother’s partner replied:
> 
> “Too soon. 😡”


I predicted lockdown wouldn't really end until September 2022 so your brother's partner is right.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Mar 29, 2021)

Surely we must have had this?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 29, 2021)




----------



## May Kasahara (Mar 29, 2021)

As a middle aged woman, the struggle is real


----------



## quiet guy (Mar 29, 2021)

I'd reposition the toilet roll just in case there is any dribbling. Nothing worse than soggy toilet roll.


----------



## T & P (Mar 29, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> I'd reposition the toilet roll just in case there is any dribbling. Nothing worse than soggy toilet roll.


Depending on the garden in question, there might be some useful leaves handy, though.


----------



## smmudge (Mar 29, 2021)




----------



## mx wcfc (Mar 30, 2021)

Off Patriot Takes on Twitter.  Free enterprise at its finest.  $250 to avoid a vaccine that could save your life, and that of people around you.


----------



## BigMoaner (Mar 30, 2021)

mx wcfc said:


> Off Patriot Takes on Twitter.  Free enterprise at its finest.  $250 to avoid a vaccine that could save your life, and that of people around you.
> View attachment 260998



 If only the could invision what a world without vacinnes is like.


----------



## rubbershoes (Mar 31, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 260795



They can bring their own bucket


----------



## cupid_stunt (Mar 31, 2021)




----------



## kabbes (Mar 31, 2021)

She made a mask out of holes?


----------



## two sheds (Mar 31, 2021)

That's what masks are largely made of  





sorry


----------



## MrSki (Mar 31, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 2, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 2, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 261071


Looking good in your new mask cupid_stunt


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 2, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 2, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Apr 2, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 2, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Looking good in your new mask cupid_stunt


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 4, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 5, 2021)

Horsing around: Australian man creates paper pony out of lunch bags in hotel quarantine
					

In mandatory Covid isolation, art director David Marriott is making the most of his design skills – and lifting morale at the same time




					www.theguardian.com
				



the horse is called Russell


----------



## MrSki (Apr 5, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 5, 2021)

All the squillions spent on building the Emperor's briefing room and they still haven't included a button for Chris Whitty to be able to select the slides for his briefing


----------



## MrSki (Apr 5, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> All the squillions spent on building the Emperor's briefing room and they still haven't included a button for Chris Whitty to be able to select the slides for his briefing


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 7, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 7, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 10, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 12, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 13, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 13, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 14, 2021)




----------



## glitch hiker (Apr 14, 2021)

Problem is mince pies are being banned as part of the war..

excuse me

the *War on Christmas *perpetrated by Sleepy Joe Hussein Biden and Dr Fauci

probably


----------



## MrSki (Apr 14, 2021)




----------



## Teaboy (Apr 14, 2021)

Well, there's no arguing with that.


----------



## emanymton (Apr 14, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


I don't like mince pies.


----------



## Clair De Lune (Apr 14, 2021)

emanymton said:


> I don't like mince pies.


This kind of loonery has no place on this thread.


----------



## emanymton (Apr 14, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> This kind of loonery has no place on this thread.


Think it would fit better on the anti-vaxx loon thread?


----------



## fishfinger (Apr 16, 2021)




----------



## Johnny Doe (Apr 16, 2021)

I thought my anti-vaxx relative had turned a corner, but this morning she's questioning why my parents are going to wait the recommended amount of time before behaving as though they have some protection from the virus. When I replied they were sensibly going with scientific consensus, she said 'the currently paid consensus?'. Then she started saying I should read something by someone or other, and he's a PHD so.....


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 16, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 16, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 16, 2021)




----------



## petee (Apr 16, 2021)

from the maker of Bathtime In Clerkenwell


----------



## Yossarian (Apr 16, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Apr 17, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 263633


----------



## gosub (Apr 17, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 263633


Month on and he's still in Brooklyn tweeting


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 17, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 17, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Apr 17, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 263689




Desperately clinging to the safe old paradigms, even as the overall context renders them useless.


----------



## Sprocket. (Apr 17, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 18, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 18, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 263851


Important to ensure people don't flirt - who knows what type of sordid physical contact would ensue after that sort of behaviour.

Or maybe the place has a really aggressive clientele.


----------



## existentialist (Apr 18, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Important to ensure people don't flirt - who knows what type of sordid physical contact would ensue after that sort of behaviour.
> 
> Or maybe the place has a really aggressive clientele.


I did wonder if that latter point was what they were getting at: fights started with "who you looking at?", etc.


----------



## BigMoaner (Apr 18, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 263851


Wtf??


----------



## BigMoaner (Apr 18, 2021)

Definitely certain pubs out there where customers should engage in"no sustained eye contact" and should be written into the licensing


----------



## William of Walworth (Apr 19, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> Definitely certain pubs out there where customers should engage in"no sustained eye contact" and should be written into the licensing




But the very carefully chosen ones I and the odd mate might be back at the outside of, when Wales allows, tend to be safe from all that 'you looking at my bird  ? nonsense 

It's all about "Real Ale drinkers** never start fights"++    :cooL:
++(copyright ex-Urbanite longdog  )

**Because they're too old, mostly


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Apr 19, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Apr 21, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 22, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Apr 22, 2021)

What does the Covid-19 pandemic and an Eastenders story line have in common? 


They've both gone on for too long


----------



## Epona (Apr 24, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> What does the Covid-19 pandemic and an Eastenders story line have in common?
> 
> 
> They've both gone on for too long



That is possibly the most correct and most poignant thing I have seen posted for weeks.

I am SO over it right now.  I want my fucking life back.  OK it wasn't much of a life, but I want it back.

Can we just nuke the site from orbit?


----------



## William of Walworth (Apr 24, 2021)

Epona said:


> That is possibly the most correct and most poignant thing I have seen posted for weeks.
> 
> I am SO over it right now.  I want my fucking life back.  OK it wasn't much of a life, but I want it back.
> 
> *Can we just nuke the site from orbit?*



At this time on a Friday into Saturday night, I strongly suspect not!


----------



## BigMoaner (Apr 24, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 264375


Def covid is one of the biggest arsheole things that's every graced this planet we call earth.


----------



## Epona (Apr 24, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> Def covid is one of the biggest arsheole things that's every graced this planet we call earth.



It could be worse - ebola or smallpox or something

(Or humans)


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 25, 2021)

I love the warning.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 25, 2021)




----------



## glitch hiker (Apr 25, 2021)

Epona said:


> It could be worse - ebola or smallpox or something
> 
> (Or humans)


Actually I think Covid is worse (than Ebola) precisely because Ebola is so fatal. It kills before it can spread. Covid just spreads


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 25, 2021)




----------



## kalmatthew (Apr 25, 2021)

glitch hiker said:


> Actually I think Covid is worse (than Ebola) precisely because Ebola is so fatal. It kills before it can spread. Covid just spreads


And its a respiratory virus. Ebola is stopped much more effectively just with good hand hygiene, you wouldn't need the same level of isolation.


----------



## Epona (Apr 25, 2021)

I do think calling it the worst thing to ever happen to the world is a little bit hyperbolic tbh.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 26, 2021)

Epona said:


> I do think calling it the worst thing to ever happen to the world is a little bit hyperbolic tbh.


Yeah, I suspect the dinosaurs would disagree with that too.


----------



## Epona (Apr 26, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Yeah, I suspect the dinosaurs would disagree with that too.



I think people who lost family in wars or during the holocaust would also disagree.

Capitalism, Fascism, poverty. oppression all have higher death tolls and ongoing effects in various ways (and have increased the coronavirus death toll too - you are more at risk if you are in poverty, you are more at risk if you are forced to work to keep out of poverty, you are more at risk if you do certain jobs etc).


----------



## Kaka Tim (Apr 26, 2021)

any info on the protest on saturday? numbers? what type of fuckwits were in attendance? who were the speakers? need to challenge some facebook bollocks.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2021)

Kaka Tim said:


> any info on the protest on saturday? numbers? what type of fuckwits were in attendance? who were the speakers? need to challenge some facebook bollocks.



This thread is mainly memes, there's a couple of others discussing the loons -









						Discussion: UK anti-vaxx 'freedom' morons, protests and QAnon idiots
					

Utter cunts, every last one of them.    Sad to see Festival-Eye Guide have gone full loon but they're getting a deserved roasting on Facebook




					www.urban75.net
				












						The stupidity of the anti-vaxx nutcases
					

Given that the anti vaxx loon seem to be spreading at an alarming rate. now boosted with their extra-loopy new theory magically linking 5G to coronavirus and the supposed development of a nano-technology-laded mind control vaccine, I thought it might be handy to have a general debunking thread...




					www.urban75.net


----------



## MrSki (Apr 26, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Apr 26, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2021)




----------



## DotCommunist (Apr 26, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 265068


Where's Sputnik V then, in the kitchen?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 26, 2021)

DotCommunist said:


> Where's Sputnik V then, in the kitchen?



Yes, you'll always find Sputnik V in the kitchen at parties, meanwhile Astrazeneca is out back smoking weed.


----------



## LDC (Apr 26, 2021)

DotCommunist said:


> Where's Sputnik V then, in the kitchen?



Necking vodka in the coal shed.


----------



## existentialist (Apr 26, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 265068


Seems to me that there are nowhere near enough explosives involved in this particular reveal party...


----------



## A380 (Apr 26, 2021)

Sinovax?


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Apr 26, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 26, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 27, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 27, 2021)




----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 27, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 265170



Someone has to point out that's not Theoden


----------



## Artaxerxes (Apr 27, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Someone has to point out that's not Theoden



No it's not, it's Eomer and Gandalf coming to his aid.

It's not meant to be Theoden in the picture.




cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 265171



Not that crazy









						COVID-19 and Your Health
					

Symptoms, testing, what to do if sick, daily activities, and more.




					www.cdc.gov


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 27, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> No it's not, it's Eomer and Gandalf coming to his aid.
> 
> It's not meant to be Theoden in the picture.



The rohirrim already with Theoden would count as an illegal gathering. They're inside.

At least Eomer and his crew are outside. And as they're dressed alike, it's arguably an organised sporting event, which would make it legal


----------



## quiet guy (Apr 27, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Apr 27, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 28, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



"Just go to the water's edge and stand very still."


----------



## MrSki (Apr 28, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 30, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Apr 30, 2021)




----------



## stdP (May 1, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 265780



Dare I ask what adrenochrome is doing on that signpost? Wasn't that the drug in the Fear and Loathing movie that made Benicio  del Toro grow tits on his back?

(Not going to search for it because that way lies madness)


----------



## Badgers (May 1, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 1, 2021)

stdP said:


> Dare I ask what adrenochrome is doing on that signpost? Wasn't that the drug in the Fear and Loathing movie that made Benicio  del Toro grow tits on his back?
> 
> (Not going to search for it because that way lies madness)



I'm fairly certain it part of the Qanon stuff where it's harvested from children by George Soros and the hollywood elite.

I was going to make a joke here adding in some ludacris beliefs  but frankly  these guys believe shit that so out there it is difficult to parody.
For example the  anti aging drug used by leftist hollywood that is made from children's foreskins. (presumably leftovers from the blood harvesting)


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 1, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> "Just go to the water's edge and stand very still."
> 
> View attachment 265316


Narwhals, Narwhals 
Swimming in the ocean
Causing a commotion
Coz they have the vaccine


----------



## fishfinger (May 1, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> ...For example the  anti aging drug used by leftist hollywood that is made from children's foreskins...


I thought the foreskins were made into hula hoops!


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 1, 2021)

The dick cheese and onion flavour


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 1, 2021)

stdP said:


> Dare I ask what adrenochrome is doing on that signpost? Wasn't that the drug in the Fear and Loathing movie that made Benicio  del Toro grow tits on his back?
> 
> (Not going to search for it because that way lies madness)





Shippou-Sensei said:


> I'm fairly certain it part of the Qanon stuff where it's harvested from children by George Soros and the hollywood elite.



Yep.



> THE DARK AGES were rife with plague, fanaticism, and accusations that Jews secretly fed off the blood of children. In 2020, we too are beset with plague, rampant medical misinformation, and a persistent rumor that “global elites” torture children to harvest the chemical adrenochrome from their blood, which they then inject in order to stay healthy and young.











						The Dark Virality of a Hollywood Blood-Harvesting Conspiracy
					

A centuries-old anti-Semitic myth is spreading freely on far-right corners of social media—suggesting a new digital Dark Age has arrived.




					www.wired.com


----------



## rubbershoes (May 1, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Yep.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Of course. Always comes back to the Joos


----------



## MrSki (May 2, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (May 2, 2021)




----------



## rubbershoes (May 2, 2021)

Different century, same shit


----------



## dessiato (May 2, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



What, well cunt seems too kind, so whatever is worse than that.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 2, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Different century, same shit
> 
> View attachment 265989


Same in Jenner's time - there's always idiots.









						History of Anti-vaccination Movements | History of Vaccines
					

Health and medical scholars have described vaccination as one of the top ten achievements of public health in the 20th century.[1] Yet, opposition to vaccination has existed as long as vaccination itself[2] (indeed, the pre-vaccination…




					www.historyofvaccines.org


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 3, 2021)




----------



## magneze (May 3, 2021)

Yeah, people teaching kids to swim. Idiots.


----------



## danski (May 3, 2021)

magneze said:


> Yeah, people teaching kids to swim. Idiots.


Yeah, that’s the only thing I could see going on in that pic


----------



## Thora (May 3, 2021)

Is it funny because they're wearing visors?


----------



## rubbershoes (May 3, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 3, 2021)

magneze said:


> Yeah, people teaching kids to swim. Idiots.



But there's no need for a face mask, and certainly not a face shield, in a pool in a massive airy building and with a bloody high ceiling, and hardly anyone else in it.


----------



## danski (May 3, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> But there's no need for a face mask, and certainly not a face shield, in a pool in a massive airy building and with a bloody high ceiling, and hardly anyone else in it.


But that was the guidance. My osteopath and hairdresser both wore the same when I saw them before the most recent lockdown. I believe it’s because of being close up to your client.


----------



## kabbes (May 3, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> But there's no need for a face mask, and certainly not a face shield, in a pool in a massive airy building and with a bloody high ceiling, and hardly anyone else in it.


Yes, standing over somebody breathing right in their face — what’s to worry about in that when you have a high ceiling?


----------



## magneze (May 3, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> But there's no need for a face mask, and certainly not a face shield, in a pool in a massive airy building and with a bloody high ceiling, and hardly anyone else in it.


Have you been in an indoor swimming pool? Airy isn't the word I'd use.


----------



## Epona (May 3, 2021)

Also some folks (especially older people) will be wary of swimming pools during any pandemic - that was thought to be a vector of transmission for polio, and although that may not be in our experience, it is for the generation older than us.  (You know, when there was last a major pandemic and somehow most people got through it ok - not so good for the ones who didn't though and devastating for many, don't want to make light of a horrific situation - but being wary of swimming in public pools is very understandable in that context).


----------



## two sheds (May 3, 2021)

He could at least be wearing a mask 

... ah

a snorkel?


----------



## Badgers (May 3, 2021)

Nature is healing


----------



## Storm Fox (May 3, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 265171


Yes well it's idiocy, but at least it's caring idiocy. Unlike the deniers and anti-maskers.


----------



## T & P (May 3, 2021)

I can’t be arsed to look it up now but I’m sure I remember reading more than once that chlorine is a pretty effective germ killer including the Covid virus, and that someone in a swimming pool would be at far less risk than most other indoor environments?

Unless someone blows air in your face, I can’t imagine the virus concentration a few centimetres above the water being very high. I guess it’d be more risky if you’re standing in the shallow end and interacting with others, but someone swimming a few lanes with no one near him, and drawing air just a couple of inches above water cannot be at that much risk if chlorinated water is indeed bad for the coronavirus’ health?


----------



## Epona (May 4, 2021)

Badgers said:


> Nature is healing




tbf, we've been in lockdown for quite a long while.  It isn't unexpected that there might be a bonobo chimp reaction upon interacting with other people for the first time in months.  It's very easy to get overexcited about social contact with others.


----------



## Thora (May 4, 2021)

T & P said:


> I can’t be arsed to look it up now but I’m sure I remember reading more than once that chlorine is a pretty effective germ killer including the Covid virus, and that someone in a swimming pool would be at far less risk than most other indoor environments?
> 
> Unless someone blows air in your face, I can’t imagine the virus concentration a few centimetres above the water being very high. I guess it’d be more risky if you’re standing in the shallow end and interacting with others, but someone swimming a few lanes with no one near him, and drawing air just a couple of inches above water cannot be at that much risk if chlorinated water is indeed bad for the coronavirus’ health?


If you’re teaching children to swim there’s a pretty high chance of them coughing or sneezing in your face, hence the visor I imagine.


----------



## editor (May 4, 2021)




----------



## Artaxerxes (May 4, 2021)

Epona said:


> tbf, we've been in lockdown for quite a long while.  It isn't unexpected that there might be a bonobo chimp reaction upon interacting with other people for the first time in months.  It's very easy to get overexcited about social contact with others.



Some are going to go crazy and hug and touch and freak out, others are going to recoil in horror.

It's going to take me years to resocialise myself.


----------



## kabbes (May 4, 2021)

editor said:


> View attachment 266351


Every single thing about that photo is pure UK magic.


----------



## Yossarian (May 5, 2021)




----------



## T & P (May 5, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (May 6, 2021)




----------



## quimcunx (May 6, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> View attachment 266143



A major environmental/health issue in 1890s cities was horse manure.  Maybe they should have asked before putting that fire out with motor vehicles!  Hmm?


----------



## Badgers (May 6, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (May 7, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (May 8, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (May 13, 2021)




----------



## rubbershoes (May 13, 2021)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (May 13, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> View attachment 267995



But what about Jesus. He didn't wear a mask?


----------



## Yossarian (May 13, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> View attachment 267995



How long before they conclude that the best way to protect themselves from the vaccine would be to develop resistance by taking a small amount of vaccine?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 13, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> How long before they conclude that the best way to protect themselves from the vaccine would be to develop resistance by taking a small amount of vaccine?


Homeopathic amounts of the vaccine perhaps?


----------



## MrSki (May 14, 2021)




----------



## fishfinger (May 14, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (May 14, 2021)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 268134



"The Antibody of Jesus Christ Our Lord" - aka the Antichrist?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 14, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> "The Antibody of Jesus Christ Our Lord" - aka the Antichrist?


My thought too - that's the logical conclusion.


----------



## T & P (May 14, 2021)

'The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing Christians their faith was all the medicine they ever needed'.


----------



## William of Walworth (May 14, 2021)

To say "*The Antibody of Jesus Christ our Lord*' is surely (for more bonkers Christians anyway), actively blasphemous? 

Excommunicate them!!


----------



## belboid (May 14, 2021)

It’s say they’ve gone for the antibody but normal blood of Christ.  Which would then counteract each other destroying both.  Sounds even dodgier than 5G


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 14, 2021)

belboid said:


> It’s say they’ve gone for the antibody but normal blood of Christ.  Which would then counteract each other destroying both.  Sounds even dodgier than 5G


I hope they also checked blood group compatibility.  Failure to do that would kill quite a lot of the recipients.


----------



## DotCommunist (May 14, 2021)

Jesus blood is probably universal, like those screwdrivers with many heads.


----------



## existentialist (May 14, 2021)

DotCommunist said:


> Jesus blood is probably universal, like those screwdrivers with many heads.


"When all you've got is a many-headed screwdriver, everything looks like a screw"?


----------



## BigMoaner (May 14, 2021)

Jesus Christ our Heavenly Father is an 8G user


----------



## T & P (May 14, 2021)




----------



## josef1878 2.0 (May 14, 2021)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 268134


They lost me with the fourth word on the top line


----------



## MrSki (May 15, 2021)




----------



## petee (May 16, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> View attachment 267995



not a joke









						A private school in Miami, citing false claims, bars vaccinated teachers from contact with students. (Published 2021)
					

Centner Academy advertises its support for “medical freedom from mandated vaccines,” and has recently hosted talks by antivaccine advocates.




					www.google.com


----------



## dessiato (May 16, 2021)

petee said:


> not a joke
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I posted that a few days ago on a different thread. I'm still stunned that "intelligent" people can think like this. I also wonder what they are teaching their students.


----------



## existentialist (May 16, 2021)

dessiato said:


> I posted that a few days ago on a different thread. I'm still stunned that "intelligent" people can think like this. I also wonder what they are teaching their students.


Sadly, intelligence does not preclude ignorance. Especially not wilful ignorance.


----------



## Orang Utan (May 17, 2021)

Finally:


----------



## Yossarian (May 18, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (May 18, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (May 19, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 19, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 20, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (May 20, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 269262


Stabbed with the lance of laissez-faire. With a follow-up blow from the morningstar of medicrity and mendacity.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 22, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (May 23, 2021)

I am still not hugging anyone but if I meet a monkey...?


----------



## Orang Utan (May 23, 2021)

I got to hug my family today. It was good.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 24, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (May 25, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 25, 2021)

On repeat?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (May 26, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (May 26, 2021)

does anyone know if after the second jab people become blue tooth enabled? asking for a friend.


----------



## Clair De Lune (May 26, 2021)




----------



## MickiQ (May 27, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> View attachment 270324


I regularly see people doing this (wearing masks in cars when alone) I mean, I am glad that I am not the only one who finds it weird


----------



## Teaboy (May 27, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> I regularly seen people doing this (wearing masks in cars I mean when alone) I mean, I am glad that I am not the only one who finds it weird


That's because they're all 12 year olds who are taking the parent's car for a spin.  The kids may not respect the law much but they ain't stupid.


----------



## Yossarian (May 27, 2021)

I put on a mask in the car if it's the weekend and I'm going past where the anti-mask protesters gather.


----------



## NoXion (May 27, 2021)

Maybe it's easier for some people to just keep their masks on, rather than having to remember to take it off/put it back on when getting in and out of the car?


----------



## two sheds (May 27, 2021)

It's the buildup of all that poisonous carbon dioxide fucking with their brain


----------



## NoXion (May 27, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



You know that deaths are being under-reported in India, right?


----------



## MrSki (May 27, 2021)

NoXion said:


> You know that deaths are being under-reported in India, right?


Even if only a tenth of deaths are being reported the UK death rate is still higher.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 27, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Even if only a tenth of deaths are being reported the UK death rate is still higher.



Not any more, India is now reporting 226 deaths per million, a lot of reports suggest it could be 10 times that, which would put them some way ahead of the UK.


----------



## MrSki (May 27, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Not any more, India is now reporting 226 deaths per million, a lot of reports suggest it could be 10 times that, which would put them some way ahead of the UK.


Fair enough but the original quote was from weeks ago.

ETA and they rates were per 100,000 not a million


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 27, 2021)

Though this might go well here


----------



## Mation (May 27, 2021)

NoXion said:


> Maybe it's easier for some people to just keep their masks on, rather than having to remember to take it off/put it back on when getting in and out of the car?


Aye. If I'm in my classroom on my own, I still keep my mask on, because I know otherwise I'll forget it when I do need to have it on.

Still made me laugh like a drain, though


----------



## Puddy_Tat (May 27, 2021)




----------



## T & P (May 28, 2021)

NoXion said:


> Maybe it's easier for some people to just keep their masks on, rather than having to remember to take it off/put it back on when getting in and out of the car?


A lot of those will also be Uber/ minicab drivers on their way to pick up their next fare. Best to be seen arriving by your customer wearing the mask- it might even be compulsory for Uber drivers to wear them at all times...


----------



## brogdale (May 28, 2021)

Recycling of loon graffiti, Croydon stylee...


----------



## May Kasahara (May 28, 2021)

In my exhausted state, I misread that as 'capitalism is the only walrus'.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 28, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Though this might go well here



I just watched this (although I did skip the bit about children being abused). Another brilliant video by Hbomberguy. I knew it would be good, Hbomberguy is always good.


----------



## brogdale (May 28, 2021)

May Kasahara said:


> In my exhausted state, I misread that as 'capitalism is the only walrus'.


Probably a bit Situationist for the Duppas Hill underpass!


----------



## MrSki (May 28, 2021)




----------



## T & P (May 29, 2021)

May Kasahara said:


> In my exhausted state, I misread that as 'capitalism is the only walrus'.


I naturally had to google capitalist walrus. There weren't many matches but this Disney rendition of The Walrus and the Carpenter probably qualifies as a capitalist one.



I did find a Marxist Walrus, though...


----------



## bemused (May 29, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> I regularly see people doing this (wearing masks in cars when alone) I mean, I am glad that I am not the only one who finds it weird



Maybe they are uber drivers?


----------



## two sheds (May 29, 2021)

True,or on their way to pick someone up


----------



## AmateurAgitator (May 29, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Though this might go well here



Having watched this yesterday it is clear to me that those that started the anti-vaccine movement are evil, aswell as not having a leg to stand on scientifically, and those supporting them are, wether they know it or not,  supporting and enabling evil.


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 30, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (May 30, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


You just know some conspiraloon wanker is going to crop the text in the bottom off, and circulate the image as an authoritative source


----------



## MrSki (May 30, 2021)

existentialist said:


> You just know some conspiraloon wanker is going to crop the text in the bottom off, and circulate the image as an authoritative source


I love the insult "You fucking potato"


----------



## existentialist (May 30, 2021)

MrSki said:


> I love the insult "You fucking potato"


I've always favoured "you plum", meself


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 30, 2021)

existentialist said:


> You just know some conspiraloon wanker is going to crop the text in the bottom off, and circulate the image as an authoritative source


No need to bother. Just claim that the bottom text was added to try and discredit the findings. It's a false flag operation trying  to hide the truth.


----------



## existentialist (May 30, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> No need to bother. Just claim that the bottom text was added to try and discredit the findings. It's a false flag operation trying  to hide the truth.


You're good at this. Too good


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 30, 2021)

existentialist said:


> You're good at this. Too good


Good. Now you're asking the right questions. Follow the trail.


----------



## MrSki (May 31, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (May 31, 2021)

That's a face that deserves a slap


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (May 31, 2021)

quiet guy said:


> That's a face that deserves a slap


Was this the face that launched a thousand slaps,
And burnt the topless towers of the NHS?
Sickening Hancock, Take my mortality with a cough:
His lips sucks forth my soul, see where it flies!
Come Hancock, come, give me my soul again.
Here will I dwell, for hell be in these lips,
And all is dross that is tory!


----------



## quiet guy (May 31, 2021)




----------



## High Voltage (May 31, 2021)

I’ve been able to train kittens shit in a litter tray faster than “some members of the most advanced species on the planet” have still not learned how to wear a fucking face mask (correctly)

sat in a pub


----------



## cupid_stunt (May 31, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 2, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 2, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Jun 2, 2021)

MrSki said:


>



It is not reasonable to laugh at the idiocy of this fool.

Also, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jun 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 6, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 6, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 6, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 6, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 9, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 9, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Jun 10, 2021)




----------



## kabbes (Jun 10, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 272745


He normally gets on a plane more often than he sees his family?


----------



## belboid (Jun 10, 2021)

Just got stats for vax’s in Sheff.  Overall only 4% of over 50s haven’t had their jabs. But in the ward I live in (which has the highest death rates in the country for a couple of weeks last year) it’s 23.5%


----------



## elbows (Jun 10, 2021)

belboid said:


> Just got stats for vax’s in Sheff.  Overall only 4% of over 50s haven’t had their jabs. But in the ward I live in (which has the highest death rates in the country for a couple of weeks last year) it’s 23.5%


Have you seen the vaccine heatmap for both first and second doses in Sheffield on the official dashboard? It seems like a poor fit with the data source you've seen.

Near the bottom of this page:



			https://coronavirus.data.gov.uk/details/vaccinations?areaType=ltla&areaName=Sheffield


----------



## belboid (Jun 10, 2021)

elbows said:


> Have you seen the vaccine heatmap for both first and second doses in Sheffield on the official dashboard? It seems like a poor fit with the data source you've seen.
> 
> Near the bottom of this page:
> 
> ...


I have taken my facts from The Star, so I wouldn’t be surprised to find they’re a bit full of shit.


----------



## elbows (Jun 11, 2021)

belboid said:


> I have taken my facts from The Star, so I wouldn’t be surprised to find they’re a bit full of shit.


OK I checked and in this case its not The Stars fault. They are using NHS vaccine data.

The problem is the population estimates used. The NHS vaccine percentages use ONS 2019 population size estimates which were created using 2011 census data. The UK government dashboard uses different population estimates depending on the exact vaccine stats in question, I think they use ONS for some stuff but for others they derive percentages using stuff such as the number of people in the National Immunisation Management Service system (NIMS). The ONS estimates of population are considered by authorities to be an underestimate of populations (and indeed some of the NHS percentages go over 100% as a result!) whereas the NIMS ones are considered likely to be an overestimate of population size!


----------



## rubbershoes (Jun 13, 2021)




----------



## kabbes (Jun 13, 2021)

I love the idea of a gene that specifically makes you read scripture.


----------



## May Kasahara (Jun 13, 2021)

I also love the insistent hectoring tone followed by the polite "I'll delete no problem kthxbai".


----------



## prunus (Jun 13, 2021)

kabbes said:


> I love the idea of a gene that specifically makes you read scripture.



Described like that it sounds silly but variations in the operation of VMAT2 (technically a protein rather than a gene, but common parlance often elides a protein’s name with that of ‘the gene encoding…’) is associated with different performative levels of ‘religiosity’ and ‘spirituality’ - ie at some level one could see it as a gene for religious fervour, which might include wanting to read more about it, in eg scripture.

So that bit of the posted rant is actually based in good science.  It’s the bit where it says the vaccine ‘shuts off’ the gene for VMAT2 where it goes a little awry.


----------



## kabbes (Jun 13, 2021)

prunus said:


> Described like that it sounds silly but variations in the operation of VMAT2 (technically a protein rather than a gene, but common parlance often elides a protein’s name with that of ‘the gene encoding…’) is associated with different performative levels of ‘religiosity’ and ‘spirituality’ - ie at some level one could see it as a gene for religious fervour, which might include wanting to read more about it, in eg scripture.
> 
> So that bit of the posted rant is actually based in good science.  It’s the bit where it says the vaccine ‘shuts off’ the gene for VMAT2 where it goes a little awry.


There are so many leaps between “a protein [which, of course, may or may not be coded for by a gene depending on environmental factors] that has been observed to be more common in religious populations” and “a gene that causes religiosity”.  Even leaving aside the whole correlation/causation thing, the codified types of religion these people are referring to are very, very recent phenomena that are constructed sociologically, not things that spontaneously exist in the environment.  The number of leaps it takes to get from one to the other is a bit overwhelming.


----------



## prunus (Jun 13, 2021)

kabbes said:


> There are so many leaps between “a protein [which, of course, may or may not be coded for by a gene depending on environmental factors] that has been observed to be more common in religious populations” and “a gene that causes religiosity”.  Even leaving aside the whole correlation/causation thing, the codified types of religion these people are referring to are very, very recent phenomena that are constructed sociologically, not things that spontaneously exist in the environment.  The number of leaps it takes to get from one to the other is a bit overwhelming.



Oh absolutely - I was being a bit tongue-in-cheek with the scientific support for the original postulation; possibly with hindsight I shouldn’t have included the qualifier ‘good’ in the last sentence


----------



## The39thStep (Jun 14, 2021)




----------



## rekil (Jun 14, 2021)

The39thStep said:


>


----------



## dessiato (Jun 14, 2021)

The39thStep said:


>



I love her accent.


----------



## existentialist (Jun 14, 2021)

The39thStep said:


>



They could have gone for a somewhat less vapid spokesperson. She SOUNDS (and looks) as if she's making it up as she goes along...!


----------



## Clair De Lune (Jun 14, 2021)

existentialist said:


> They could have gone for a somewhat less vapid spokesperson. She SOUNDS (and looks) as if she's making it up as she goes along...!


I dunno if my sarcasm detector is off or yours


----------



## existentialist (Jun 14, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> I dunno if my sarcasm detector is off or yours


Wot, the first one too? I thought the first one was genuine! 😊

ETA: Ah, OK. "Threenickel". I've been trolled


----------



## Clair De Lune (Jun 14, 2021)

existentialist said:


> Wot, the first one too? I thought the first one was genuine! 😊
> 
> ETA: Ah, OK. "Threenickel". I've been trolled


Not the stuck blood, bottom smacking like you're a bottle of sauce then? 🤭


----------



## existentialist (Jun 14, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> Not the stuck blood, bottom smacking like you're a bottle of sauce then? 🤭


Somehow, no  I think I have become inured to that kind of stupidity, so the bar has been lowered...


----------



## Clair De Lune (Jun 14, 2021)

existentialist said:


> Somehow, no  I think I have become inured to that kind of stupidity, so the bar has been lowered...


I'm gonna have to test your gullibility in person me thinks


----------



## existentialist (Jun 14, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> I'm gonna have to test your gullibility in person me thinks


----------



## MrSki (Jun 14, 2021)

figures unverified. But FFS!


----------



## rubbershoes (Jun 16, 2021)

Loons gonna loon


----------



## Supine (Jun 16, 2021)




----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jun 18, 2021)

From a very active conspiracy posting ex school friend on facebook:

IN MY OPINION ;
We will be blamed. We being, those that said from the beginning that life will never return to normal, will be blamed for keeping the country / the world in lockdown. New varients will be named, more lockdowns will follow. The push on the jabs will continue. Digital IDs will be required for you to exist in society that will entitle you to the few freedoms they allow.
Those that weren't aware of the huge list of agenda's will blame us. The time taken, the complexity and the design is so incomprehensible / unbelievable, is why most will never grasp what's happening and what's to come. What's occurring is truly prophetic.
The indoctrinated are lost. They have been distracted in so many ways; by TV, sports, politics, religion, wars, race, discrimination of the sexes and money. The social and political elite are to blame for EVERYTHING, but they will create a narrative to protect themselves everytime!!!!
When it all goes wrong, when they've collapsed the economy, when they've destroyed the social fabric of our society, when they've finished taking apart our lives, when there's nothing left, THEY will STILL be in control and will introduce their utopia (our dystopia). The beast system will finally be put in place. The cashless society. The NWO. The one world religion. The one world Government. Equality will be their key phrase... But in reality it won't even come close.
The time frame for this? Cashless by 2025 is the banks target. A financial reset will occur.
"The Great Reset" , the World Economic Forum's ideology "you will own nothing and be happy" for 2030.
Then there's the eugenics side of the plan. Population reduction / depopulation. People need to start to ask "how will this be achieved?" There are many views on this including Bill Gates quote "using vaccines we can reduce the population by 1.3 billion".... You work it out!
The end date for these agendas is 2050. I don't want to leave this world knowing I didn't fight for my childrens future. I will lay down my life to stop this. Tens of millions have already fought and died to protect those they love, in the belief that their sacrifice will enable freedom to continue. This freedom is being stolen.


----------



## existentialist (Jun 18, 2021)

Hassan I Sabha said:


> From a very active conspiracy posting ex school friend on facebook:
> 
> IN MY OPINION ;
> We will be blamed. We being, those that said from the beginning that life will never return to normal, will be blamed for keeping the country / the world in lockdown. New varients will be named, more lockdowns will follow. The push on the jabs will continue. Digital IDs will be required for you to exist in society that will entitle you to the few freedoms they allow.
> ...


Let us know when he gets to the "laying down his life" bit


----------



## A380 (Jun 21, 2021)

Hassan I Sabha said:


> From a very active conspiracy posting ex school friend on facebook:
> 
> IN MY OPINION ;
> We will be blamed. We being, those that said from the beginning that life will never return to normal, will be blamed for keeping the country / the world in lockdown. New varients will be named, more lockdowns will follow. The push on the jabs will continue. Digital IDs will be required for you to exist in society that will entitle you to the few freedoms they allow.
> ...


I presume they will only get his keyboard when they prise it from his cold dead hands?


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jun 22, 2021)

A380 said:


> I presume they will only get his keyboard when they prise it from his cold dead hands?


Presumably after contracting measles.


----------



## A380 (Jun 22, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Presumably after contracting measles.


Don’t you mean Freedom Acne?


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jun 22, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Presumably after getting dart gunned by droneships filled with bill gate's 'vaccine'


Fixed it for the conspira crowd


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jun 22, 2021)

A380 said:


> Don’t you mean Freedom Acne?


That's small pox.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jun 22, 2021)

People don't tell you this but small pox actually makes you live longer and healthier. That's why big pharma killed it. They claim that it kills people but if you look at the numbers you can see it was actually due to people trying to become more reliant on westernised medicine. That's why only now that we have embraced alternative lifestyles are we starting to see the benefits. Thats why the world government had to invent this hoax to bring people back undercontrol.
Don't you see, no other explanation makes sense.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jun 22, 2021)

Unless it's aliens.


----------



## MrSki (Jun 23, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Jun 24, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 24, 2021)




----------



## DotCommunist (Jun 24, 2021)

Hassan I Sabha said:


> They have been distracted in so many ways; by TV, sports,* politics*, religion, wars, race, discrimination of the sexes and money.


literally the next sentemce:



Hassan I Sabha said:


> The social and political elite are to blame for EVERYTHING, but they will create a narrative to protect themselves everytime!!!!


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Jun 25, 2021)




----------



## May Kasahara (Jun 25, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jun 28, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jun 29, 2021)




----------



## quiet guy (Jun 30, 2021)

New version Swiss Army knife is a bit OTT


----------



## 2hats (Jun 30, 2021)




----------



## Epona (Jul 1, 2021)

Is that cress or alfalfa?  Good demonstration of why you shouldn't eat your lunch over the keyboard.


----------



## dessiato (Jul 1, 2021)

2hats said:


>



Where did the seeds get the moisture that they'd need to sprout and grow?


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 1, 2021)

It’s made up, he’s grown stuff for a giggle


----------



## rubbershoes (Jul 1, 2021)

dessiato said:


> Where did the seeds get the moisture that they'd need to sprout and grow?



His coworker has been office based throughout the pandemic and has continued to piss on Andy's keyboard, same as they have done for years


----------



## Epona (Jul 1, 2021)

dessiato said:


> Where did the seeds get the moisture that they'd need to sprout and grow?


I've never worked in an office that has been a completely dessicated environment


----------



## brogdale (Jul 1, 2021)

A fine CWS:


----------



## petee (Jul 1, 2021)

jesus h. fucking goddam christ in a chicken basket









						Washington lawmaker wears yellow Star of David, evoking Nazi persecution, to protest COVID vaccine mandates
					

Activists who oppose mandatory vaccines have deployed Nazi and Holocaust analogies even before the pandemic, drawing condemnations from the Anti-Defamation League and other Jewish organizations, which call such comparisons deeply offensive.




					www.seattletimes.com


----------



## 2hats (Jul 3, 2021)

Hancock or new Mu variant?


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 5, 2021)

Round and round 





2hats said:


> Hancock or new Mu variant?




The intern I assume


----------



## Badgers (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## ska invita (Jul 5, 2021)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 276929


this is the only data the govenrment are interested in:



the break between hospitalisations/deaths and cases...

the new problem is going to be new mutations and long covid cases, including potential hundreds of thousands of cases in children


----------



## MrSki (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## zahir (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jul 5, 2021)

zahir said:


>



We can just live in hope the cunt PM gets a vicious variant that his policies will unleash and puts him out of our misery.


----------



## quiet guy (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## two sheds (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 5, 2021)




----------



## spring-peeper (Jul 6, 2021)

MrSki said:


>




gas/petrol fumes?


----------



## MrSki (Jul 6, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Jul 6, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> gas/petrol fumes?


A mask will make no difference to those. I don't think that mask will even make any difference to particulates.


----------



## Dogsauce (Jul 6, 2021)

,


spring-peeper said:


> gas/petrol fumes?


Effective against fly-swallowing.


----------



## Clair De Lune (Jul 7, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 8, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 8, 2021)




----------



## Clair De Lune (Jul 8, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Jul 9, 2021)

Clair De Lune said:


> View attachment 277638


That was my day yesterday. "Oh, my email never went through" turned into the total replacement and spam-hardening of a mail server. Still, I got it done. I've still got it  (l33t IT skills, not "it", obvs)

ETA for what it's worth, Exim has more baked-in antispam provision than Postfix does. Public service announcement concludes.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 9, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Jul 9, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 277656



I think the idea is more to protect the cashier from you, tbh - been many cases of checkout workers etc. getting infected at work but no cases of anybody getting infected from touching their shopping, not sure if there's even been a confirmed case of transmission through touching anything.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 9, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> I think the idea is more to protect the cashier from you, tbh - been many cases of checkout workers etc. getting infected at work but no cases of anybody getting infected from touching their shopping, not sure if there's even been a confirmed case of transmission through touching anything.



The plastic screens are next to useless TBH, they came about from the early thinking that transmission occurred mainly from [large] droplets, projected from coughs and sneezes, which can clearly still happen if you cough or sneeze right in front of someone, but it's not the main risk. It was also thought there was a high risk of droplets landing on surfaces, resulting in transmission via hands & the touching of faces, but that has been found to be almost impossible/low risk.

In fact the main route of transmission is now considered to be via aerosols, which everyone breaths out, that are so small that buoyant forces overcome gravity, allowing them to stay suspended in the air for long periods, and so drift around and over screens, hence screens & face shields worn without a mask are somewhat pointless, and good ventilation has become more important in recent months.


----------



## quiet guy (Jul 9, 2021)

Wouldn't be surprised if plexiglass/ perspex manufacturers had some cushy deal with HMG because they made a mint over these sales and the prices skyrocketed


----------



## Sprocket. (Jul 9, 2021)




----------



## steveo87 (Jul 10, 2021)

Until this morning I had no idea who Delores Cahill was, but this is all about the Gaudia (Hugh Shovlin), police around the world, be more like Hugh.


----------



## spitfire (Jul 10, 2021)

I just put another video of this on the anti vax thread. She’s off her head.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 10, 2021)

Yep, proper loon, but that guard is funny as fuck.


----------



## spitfire (Jul 10, 2021)

rekil


----------



## Chilli.s (Jul 10, 2021)

Delores Cahill, what a fruitloop


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jul 11, 2021)

from tweeter - published in germany


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 12, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 13, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Jul 13, 2021)




----------



## elbows (Jul 13, 2021)

It feels like an opportunity is being missed for some kind of Harry Hill Gareth Southgate badger 'but whose going to get the badgers ready for the freedom day parade?' type joke.


----------



## Yossarian (Jul 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 14, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jul 16, 2021)




----------



## editor (Jul 16, 2021)

Good job Huw


----------



## DaveCinzano (Jul 16, 2021)

Huwed energy


----------



## MrSki (Jul 17, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 17, 2021)




----------



## editor (Jul 17, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 17, 2021)




----------



## elbows (Jul 18, 2021)




----------



## elbows (Jul 18, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Jul 18, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 18, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 18, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 18, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 18, 2021)




----------



## Ax^ (Jul 18, 2021)

so it the latest batshit rambling from my brother in law..

its not a good idea to get vaccinated even if it appears that it inevitable we wil get a new wave of infections with the upcoming unlocking of restrictions
as any mutation of the covid virus will  reconise the antibodies present in the body and latch up

basically you will be more likely to die if you been vaccinated 

also the second wave of spanish flu death were caused by people wearing masks and getting bacteria pneumonia as prove by Fauci 

just glad i know better than to argue with the fella anymore


----------



## l'Otters (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jul 19, 2021)

This amount other reasons is why  I  only have a Facebook account to use my occulus.

I got rid of my personal one ages ago.

My pillow still has one but I haven't used that one in a while.


----------



## existentialist (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Raheem (Jul 19, 2021)

existentialist said:


> View attachment 279388


I happen to know that piano is out by a semitone, so the letters on the keys are 100% correct.

ETA: Just realised it wouldn't work like that. Goddamn.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jul 19, 2021)

Raheem said:


> I happen to know that piano is out by a semitone, so the letters on the keys are 100% correct.



that joke requires some musical knowledge, so maybe it will fall a bit flat?


----------



## Raheem (Jul 19, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> that joke requires some musical knowledge, so maybe it will fall a bit flat?


Give it a rest.


----------



## smmudge (Jul 19, 2021)

Raheem said:


> I happen to know that piano is out by a semitone, so the letters on the keys are 100% correct.
> 
> ETA: Just realised it wouldn't work like that. Goddamn.



That wasn't too sharp was it


----------



## kabbes (Jul 19, 2021)

Who actually is it that says “you have to respect other people’s opinions”, regardless of that opinion?


----------



## Raheem (Jul 19, 2021)

kabbes said:


> Who actually is it that says “you have to respect other people’s opinions”, regardless of that opinion?


Think they usually only say the bit you've put in quotes.


----------



## ska invita (Jul 19, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 277656



typical consumer society bias!


----------



## Raheem (Jul 19, 2021)

smmudge said:


> That wasn't too sharp was it


Not sure I like your tenor.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Jul 19, 2021)

People, let's not argue, let us gather round and break bread together despite our differences


----------



## Raheem (Jul 19, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> People, let's not argue, let us gather round and break bread together despite our differences
> 
> View attachment 279398


Beans then cheese, I see.


----------



## kabbes (Jul 19, 2021)

Raheem said:


> Think they usually only say the bit you've put in quotes.


Then why do these memes beloved of liberals always also imply the latter bit too?  It’s like the liberal version of “the Muslims banned Christmas, you know”


----------



## Raheem (Jul 19, 2021)

kabbes said:


> Then why do these memes beloved of liberals always also imply the latter bit too?  It’s like the liberal version of “the Muslims banned Christmas, you know”


People tend to say "ygtropo" in the context of an opinion that the agree with or don't wish to see argued over for some other reason. I think the piano jpeg is just pointing out that it doesn't actually make sense as an attitude to life.


----------



## kabbes (Jul 19, 2021)

Raheem said:


> People tend to say "ygtropo" in the context of an opinion that the agree with or don't wish to see argued over for some other reason. I think the piano jpeg is just pointing out that it doesn't actually make sense as an attitude to life.


No, the piano pic is a strawman at best.  Nobody is saying that opinions are a replacement for everything.  Saying “you have to respect their opinion” is a reference to things that are opinion-based in the first place.

Honestly, I’d rather we try to raise the standard of debate across the board than just see the left being an even shittier version of the right when it comes to misrepresentation and idiocy.


----------



## Fez909 (Jul 19, 2021)

Isn't it more "respect the right for people to have an opinion" on something - rather than being shut down by the gatekeepers of whatever it is you're talking about?

"You can have a say, and you're welcome to be massively wrong, but you're going to get called out on it"


----------



## existentialist (Jul 19, 2021)

kabbes said:


> Who actually is it that says “you have to respect other people’s opinions”, regardless of that opinion?


TBF, not that many. Usually, they say "you have to respect MY opinion"...


----------



## Epona (Jul 19, 2021)

ska invita said:


> typical consumer society bias!



Ah god Jeremy Vine show this morning (not my choice of TV) going on about how going to nightclubs without face masks or social distancing is all about individual choice and no-one is forced to do it.

TELL THAT TO THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE.
(OH's pre-COVID regular job, which he used to love, is in a nightclub and he is NOT looking forward to going back to work as things stand)


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jul 19, 2021)

My local FB Conspiraloon's latest


----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Supine (Jul 19, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Jul 19, 2021)

Hassan I Sabha said:


> My local FB Conspiraloon's latest


what state of emergency?


----------



## May Kasahara (Jul 19, 2021)

Hassan I Sabha said:


>


The really depressing thing about this is that people in government do routinely lie, scheme, manipulate and rake in the cash in all sorts of ways, and are frequently exposed in doing so. But conspiraloons don't seem to be bothered about things like cronyism or massive tax avoidance/ hedge fund schemes, presumably because they're not glamorous or dramatic enough.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Jul 20, 2021)

Not that's I'd have the faintest clue.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jul 20, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 279521
> 
> Not that's I'd have the faintest clue.


Let me get back to you on that.


----------



## MrSki (Jul 21, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Jul 21, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 21, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Jul 21, 2021)




----------



## pbsmooth (Jul 21, 2021)

Fuck Ian Brown. Tin ear cunt.


----------



## existentialist (Jul 22, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


>



How mature.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 22, 2021)




----------



## glitch hiker (Jul 22, 2021)

existentialist said:


> How mature.


ZaNu LiEbOrE

ah, good times


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Jul 22, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 279911



It always amazes me how much power some folks in the US ascribe to such an organisation that has such little power as the UN.


----------



## MrSki (Jul 23, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Jul 23, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Jul 23, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 280100


And there is the subtlety of the propaganda. Keep pushing the message that it's the APP making the problems, and you'll have everybody looking in the wrong direction.


----------



## T & P (Jul 23, 2021)




----------



## bellaozzydog (Jul 23, 2021)

existentialist said:


> And there is the subtlety of the propaganda. Keep pushing the message that it's the APP making the problems, and you'll have everybody looking in the wrong direction.



the irony being the moment it starts working properly they don’t want it to


----------



## T & P (Jul 23, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jul 25, 2021)

🤣🤣🤣









						LA man who mocked Covid-19 vaccines dies of virus
					

Stephen Harmon, who opposed getting vaccinated, has died after a month-long struggle with the virus.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 25, 2021)

Badgers said:


> 🤣🤣🤣
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Time for a re-post.


----------



## MrSki (Jul 25, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jul 25, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


Fairly certain this is a Dr Who monster.


----------



## existentialist (Jul 25, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Fairly certain this is a Dr Who monster.


If it isn't, it will be...


----------



## BigMoaner (Jul 25, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Loons gonna loon
> 
> View attachment 273708


Such massive dickheads.


----------



## existentialist (Jul 25, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Loons gonna loon
> 
> View attachment 273708


Evil fucking twats.


----------



## BigMoaner (Jul 25, 2021)

Hassan I Sabha said:


>


Didn't gates say that if you support people's health through vaccination they would have less desire/need to have more children, as their minds and lives would move in other directions, therefore population would go down.

Thats where the loons have got this from.


----------



## elbows (Jul 26, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Fairly certain this is a Dr Who monster.



I've made the following joke before but Im usually quite happy to repeat myself.

Its even better now though because to say he ends up cowering in his chair at the end of this clip is an understatement.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Jul 26, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Jul 26, 2021)

elbows said:


> I've made the following joke before but Im usually quite happy to repeat myself.
> 
> Its even better now though because to say he ends up cowering in his chair at the end of this clip is an understatement.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 26, 2021)

Daily Star take on covid being spread by farts...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 26, 2021)

Gave them 'in error'? 

When looking into this, I found this corker of a headline. 









						Anal Swab Covid Test Won’t Make You Waddle Like A ‘Penguin,’ China Says
					

Chinese authorities said a viral video of people seemingly struggling to walk after using the newly introduced test is a fake.




					www.forbes.com
				




And, here's the video.


----------



## LDC (Jul 26, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> Didn't gates say that if you support people's health through vaccination they would have less desire/need to have more children, as their minds and lives would move in other directions, therefore population would go down.
> 
> Thats where the loons have got this from.



Yeah, that's what I always assumed was the root of this claim. It's GCSE level Geography or Sociology or something that reducing mortality (in this case through vaccination) reduces the number of kids people have.


----------



## FridgeMagnet (Jul 26, 2021)




----------



## scalyboy (Jul 26, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> It always amazes me how much power some folks in the US ascribe to such an organisation that has such little power as the UN.


I have been wondering recently if a connecting factor among conspiraloons is a disinterest in politics, not paying attention to national / international politics and not reading the news beyond the most cursory level. 
Anyone who's been following the UK government's shambolic handling of the pandemic can see that they have repeatedly twisted and U-turned - according to public opinion, to their business mates, and to swivel-eyed backbenchers - with no overall strategy at all. This shower of c*nts couldn't co-ordinate a panda's tea party, let alone some global Agenda 21 Reset plan. 

I reckon the same goes for US politics, and any governments really. Anyone who's worked for a large organisation knows how many cock-ups and accidents occur behind the scenes, while they attempt to present an efficient and successful face to the public.


----------



## two sheds (Jul 26, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 280586
> 
> Gave them 'in error'?
> 
> ...




 but I'm not watching that video


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 26, 2021)

two sheds said:


> but I'm not watching that video



You should, you only see people waddling away from a testing centre.

A mate did similar some years ago, when he was called first, then waddled out past the others waiting for their vasectomies.


----------



## Yossarian (Jul 26, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Jul 26, 2021)

“Anti-vaxxers” is such a negative term.

Why not use “pro-disease” instead?


----------



## Storm Fox (Jul 26, 2021)

I think kurzgesagt (youTube channel) sums it up the best. The biggest side effect of childhood vaccines is more children.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Jul 26, 2021)

Storm Fox said:


> I think kurzgesagt (youTube channel) sums it up the best. The biggest side effect of childhood vaccines is more children.


Kurzgesagt is great


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 26, 2021)

Storm Fox said:


> I think kurzgesagt (youTube channel) sums it up the best. The biggest side effect of childhood vaccines is more children


Spot the moment we discovered vaccines


----------



## existentialist (Jul 26, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> Spot the moment we discovered vaccines
> 
> View attachment 280676


See? Vaccines are evil


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jul 26, 2021)

existentialist said:


> See? Vaccines are evil



Nothing more British than hating kids, down with this sort of thing


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 27, 2021)




----------



## jontz01 (Jul 27, 2021)

bin done yet?


----------



## existentialist (Jul 27, 2021)

jontz01 said:


> bin done yet?
> 
> 
> 
> View attachment 280722


I bet he was feeling proper aggravated #rimshot #hereallweek


----------



## T & P (Jul 27, 2021)




----------



## elbows (Jul 27, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 28, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Jul 28, 2021)




----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jul 28, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


needs a bigger stage and large adoring crowds to work properly, but I like the concept.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 29, 2021)

Good cartoon from the Telegraph, with special mention of the Marble Arch Mound.


----------



## fishfinger (Jul 30, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Jul 30, 2021)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 281307


One of the memes of the pandemic. 

"its not fair I don't want to be part of your control group!" 

Well take the fucking vacinne then numbnuts!


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jul 30, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Jul 31, 2021)




----------



## Kaka Tim (Aug 1, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Aug 1, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Aug 1, 2021)

A380 said:


> View attachment 281607


I’ve never seen it explained liked that before. I’m convinced.


----------



## kabbes (Aug 1, 2021)

A380 said:


> View attachment 281607


They missed out that Z is 26 -> 6


----------



## kabbes (Aug 1, 2021)

And hang on — R is 18.  On the other hand, P genuinely is 16.


----------



## kabbes (Aug 1, 2021)

Pfizer - 16 6 9 26 5 18.  Put the 16 with the 6 to get 22
(Pf)izer- 22 6 9 26 5 18
Satan - 19 1 20 1 14
Gates - 8 1 20 5 19

Add the columns

49 8 48 32 51

4 9 8 4 8 3 25 1 gives you dihdicya

this is clearly a symbolism for
 Does Injury, Harm, Death In Children / Young Adults


----------



## ddraig (Aug 1, 2021)

A380 said:


> View attachment 281607


already posted


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 1, 2021)

ddraig said:


> already posted



Not on this thread.


----------



## danny la rouge (Aug 1, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Not on this thread.


Not on my watch.


----------



## existentialist (Aug 1, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Not on my watch.


Not on my nellie.


----------



## danny la rouge (Aug 1, 2021)

existentialist said:


> Not on my nellie.


There was a character called Nellie in the episode of Rebecka Martinsson: Arctic Murders that I watched last night.  Still not used to the new Rebecka. She doesn’t have the same range. She’s good, but she seems just to do sullen.  The old one had more to her palate.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Aug 1, 2021)

something about R being the 16th letter in the italian alphabet


----------



## T & P (Aug 2, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Aug 2, 2021)

ETA: wrong thread!


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Aug 2, 2021)

(i've looked it up, lordi are a finnish heavy metal band)


----------



## T & P (Aug 2, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 281818
> 
> 
> 
> (i've looked it up, lordi are a finnish heavy metal band)


And one of the most celebrated Eurovision winners of all time!


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Aug 2, 2021)

T & P said:


> And one of the most celebrated Eurovision winners of all time!


----------



## T & P (Aug 3, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


>


Were you in hibernation that year? It was seismic at the time!

ETA: I am depressed to see that it was 15 years ago- I feel so old…- so you get a pass if you were a nipper in 2006.

Seriously though, it was epic. We were on holiday in a small Greek town at the time, and tourists and locals alike were watching it live in the TVs of all the town’s restaurants and tabernas like it was the World Cup final 









						Remembering when Lordi won Eurovision and took monsters to the…
					

Fifteen years ago, Finland’s monster-metallers Lordi won Eurovision. This is the story of how it happened, the impact it had on the band, and what it meant for the world’s biggest music show…




					www.kerrang.com


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Aug 3, 2021)

T & P said:


> Were you in hibernation that year? It was seismic at the time!





T & P said:


> ETA: I am depressed to see that it was 15 years ago- I feel so old…- so you get a pass if you were a nipper in 2006.



no, i just tend to ignore eurovision and hope it will go away 

we had a referendum to leave eurovision, didn't we?


----------



## two sheds (Aug 3, 2021)

T & P said:


> ETA: I am depressed to see that it was 15 years ago- I feel so old…- so you get a pass if you were a nipper in 2006.


after my time


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Aug 3, 2021)

Don't think I have watched eurovision since the 70s


----------



## Artaxerxes (Aug 3, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> no, i just tend to ignore eurovision and hope it will go away
> 
> we had a referendum to leave eurovision, didn't we?



If leaving Eurovision had been on the ballot I'd have voted Leave like a shot.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 3, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> Don't think I have watched eurovision since the 70s



I know I haven't.


----------



## souljacker (Aug 3, 2021)

Last time I watched it was when bucks fizz were on. I didn't realise they had heavy metal on it.


----------



## NoXion (Aug 3, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 3, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 3, 2021)




----------



## Sasaferrato (Aug 3, 2021)

souljacker said:


> Last time I watched it was when bucks fizz were on. I didn't realise they had heavy metal on it.



I used to see Cheryl Baker from Bucks Fizz most days, her mother had the flower shop in the Queen Elizabeth Military Hospital at Woolwich and she used to help her. Lovely lassie.


----------



## Sasaferrato (Aug 3, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 281848


Genuine LOL!


----------



## rubbershoes (Aug 4, 2021)

souljacker said:


> Last time I watched it was when bucks fizz were on. I didn't realise they had heavy metal on it.



That's the point. Most songs are still crappy euro shite and so for Lordi to win was so unexpected.


----------



## krink (Aug 4, 2021)

T & P said:


> it was 15 years ago



People can post all the evidence they like but I refuse to believe this was more than maybe 5 years ago at the very most.


----------



## Yossarian (Aug 5, 2021)




----------



## kabbes (Aug 5, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 282150


I had to look that band up to realise how clever that joke was.  Namely that their drummers really have been replaced regularly over the years, their singer really does have a PhD in molecular biology and this particular drummer really was dropped after refusing the vaccine.


----------



## fishfinger (Aug 5, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 6, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Aug 6, 2021)

doing the rounds today


----------



## Sasaferrato (Aug 7, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Not any more, India is now reporting 226 deaths per million, a lot of reports suggest it could be 10 times that, which would put them some way ahead of the UK.



The bodies floating down the Ganges is an indicator of how badly India has suffered.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 7, 2021)

In time for the next lockdown?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 7, 2021)

Both clever & mad.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 8, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Aug 8, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 282669


On holiday once, the waiter brought wine and offered it to me to taste. I said yep it was all good, but he clearly didn't trust my judgement as he then poured himself a little taster, to be on the safe side  

So, I really want to hear that vaccine lady gave herself a smidgen of Law Boy's jab too


----------



## Aladdin (Aug 8, 2021)

T & P said:


> Were you in hibernation that year? It was seismic at the time!
> 
> ETA: I am depressed to see that it was 15 years ago- I feel so old…- so you get a pass if you were a nipper in 2006.
> 
> ...



I cannot believe its 15 years ago.

Well..that flew...

😳


----------



## petee (Aug 9, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 9, 2021)




----------



## Sprocket. (Aug 9, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 282806


It’s funny cos it could come true.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 11, 2021)




----------



## Clair De Lune (Aug 11, 2021)




----------



## glitch hiker (Aug 11, 2021)

petee said:


>



Still not banned from twitter, paul joseph watson is utter scum


----------



## BigMoaner (Aug 11, 2021)

glitch hiker said:


> Still not banned from twitter, paul joseph watson is utter scum


would be terrible, awful if the cunt got long covid.


----------



## glitch hiker (Aug 11, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> would be terrible, awful if the cunt got long covid.


Yes, so _so_ sad


----------



## existentialist (Aug 11, 2021)

glitch hiker said:


> Yes, so _so_ sad


I'd be so sad, I'd laugh my fucking face off. 😂


----------



## petee (Aug 11, 2021)

_Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul_









						‘Rise Up, Patriots!’ Rand Paul Calls To Intubated Patients Lying Unconscious In Hospital ICU
					

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who...




					www.theonion.com


----------



## existentialist (Aug 11, 2021)

petee said:


> _Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul_
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Remembering that life seems to be increasingly imitating satire, it's probably worth pointing out that The Onion is a satirical site. Although, you never know...


----------



## spitfire (Aug 11, 2021)

existentialist said:


> Remembering that life seems to be increasingly imitating satire, it's probably worth pointing out that The Onion is a satirical site. Although, you never know...



TBH I got to the end of the summary and only realised it was satire when I saw it was from the onion. I wouldn't put anything past these fruitcakes now.


----------



## Storm Fox (Aug 11, 2021)

With Newsthump, I'll often read the satire and then work backward to the original story, which is often, depressingly, not that different from the original


----------



## Badgers (Aug 11, 2021)




----------



## josef1878 2.0 (Aug 11, 2021)

petee said:


> _Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul_
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Well that will work


----------



## petee (Aug 12, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 12, 2021)

petee said:


>



Maths isn't her strong point it seems.  It's difficult to tell if some of these are spoofs though - surely people can't be that stupid.


----------



## Epona (Aug 12, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Maths isn't her strong point it seems.  It's difficult to tell if some of these are spoofs though - surely people can't be that stupid.


Sorry, what?


----------



## _Russ_ (Aug 12, 2021)

If you put the whole thing in context I think its likely that its simply lazy writing and she  omitted the words "cases in"


----------



## two sheds (Aug 12, 2021)

OR more people are getting vaccinated causing an increase in vaccine shedding which is INFECTIOUS.


----------



## kabbes (Aug 12, 2021)

If I’m giving the benefit of the doubt, I think it’s saying that people who have received vaccinations are less cautious (because they personally are safer).  There is therefore more virus knocking about, which makes things more dangerous for the unvaccinated.

It may be that this is true. We were initially hopeful that the vaccines would prevent spread and thus eliminate the disease. It seems that the delta variant at least, however, has a good number of days even in vaccinated people during which it can be passed on. It is believable  that behavioural change in the vaccinated more than compensates for the reduced transmissibility, such that the risk to the unvaccinated has gone up rather than down.


----------



## danski (Aug 12, 2021)

kabbes said:


> If I’m giving the benefit of the doubt, I think it’s saying that people who have received vaccinations are less cautious (because they personally are safer).  There is therefore more virus knocking about, which makes things more dangerous for the unvaccinated.
> 
> It may be that this is true. We were initially hopeful that the vaccines would prevent spread and thus eliminate the disease. It seems that the delta variant at least, however, has a good number of days even in vaccinated people during which it can be passed on. It is believable  that behavioural change in the vaccinated more than compensates for the reduced transmissibility, such that the risk to the unvaccinated has gone up rather than down.


If only there was a way the unvaccinated could lessen their risk


----------



## Epona (Aug 12, 2021)

danski said:


> If only there was a way the unvaccinated could lessen their risk



I am absolutely 100% pro vaccination and always have been - for everything from Smallpox to BCG to MMR to my god they have an HPV vaccine now, isn't that wonderful?!

But not everyone can have a vaccine. - due to health issues such as severe allergies and other auto-immune conditions.  It is on the people who CAN have it to get vaccinated to help provide some protection for those who can't.  Not to shame those who really can't get a vaccination for health reasons.


----------



## danski (Aug 12, 2021)

Epona said:


> I am absolutely 100% pro vaccination and always have been - for everything from Smallpox to BCG to MMR to my god they have an HPV vaccine now, isn't that wonderful?!
> 
> But not everyone can have a vaccine. - due to health issues such as severe allergies and other auto-immune conditions.  It is on the people who CAN have it to get vaccinated to help provide some protection for those who can't.  Not to shame those who really can't for health reasons get a vaccination.


Of course but I doubt that’s the angle of the person posting that which we are commenting on.


----------



## Epona (Aug 12, 2021)

danski said:


> Of course but I doubt that’s the angle of the person posting that which we are commenting on.



Oh absolutely, I know you weren't saying that at all - sorry if it came across that I was criticising yout!!  It was a comment based on the wider context.


----------



## _Russ_ (Aug 12, 2021)

two sheds said:


> OR more people are getting vaccinated causing an increase in vaccine shedding which is INFECTIOUS.


Sorry I didnt intend to make a comment  on the overall motive of the piece, just a likely guess at the intended meaning of that sentence which seems completely nonsensical if read literally.
Kabbes' explanation of the overall meaning seems likely to me.


----------



## two sheds (Aug 12, 2021)

Sorry, no slight intended - I think you were right about meaning.


----------



## elbows (Aug 12, 2021)

Epona said:


> I am absolutely 100% pro vaccination and always have been - for everything from Smallpox to BCG to MMR to my god they have an HPV vaccine now, isn't that wonderful?!
> 
> But not everyone can have a vaccine. - due to health issues such as severe allergies and other auto-immune conditions.  It is on the people who CAN have it to get vaccinated to help provide some protection for those who can't.  Not to shame those who really can't get a vaccination for health reasons.



Hopes of what can be achieved on that front are diminished these days. Because Delta spreads between vaccinated people, so the ultimate herd immunity scenario where a threshold is crossed that stops large community outbreaks is looking implausible to some experts. ie its not going to be like the sort of population immunity we can get against measles via mass vaccination.

But even if that picture holds true, there are a few things that can still be salvaged on that front.

For example huge numbers of vaccinated people may still be able to slow the spread somewhat compared to what it would have been like without vaccines. This can happen even when vaccinated people can still catch and spread it, because less of them get infected, or if they are capable of transmission for a slightly shorter period of time compared to unvaccinated people.

The other thing that can still be achieved is that overall hospital numbers are kept lower, enabling there to still be enough capacity to treat those who get really sick.

On the downside, the vaccine era gives authorities reasons to remove restrictions, leaving people more exposed, with the unvaccianted left more vulnerable than they were in the past.


----------



## kabbes (Aug 12, 2021)

Indeed. This virus presents a horrific scenario for the immune compromised, in which the world may well return to a normality that involves no infection control, with this virus being allowed to circulate freely because it presents little to no risk to 99.5% of those who get it. I don’t really know what to say about that, except “fuck”.


----------



## MrSki (Aug 12, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Aug 13, 2021)




----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 13, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 283347




Love that!!!

Wish I had the guts to post in on facebook....even messaging it to my idiot son-in-law


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 13, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> Love that!!!
> 
> Wish I had the guts to post in on facebook....even messaging it to my idiot son-in-law



Why wouldn't you have the guts to post a cartoon on FB?


----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 13, 2021)

krtek a houby said:


> Why wouldn't you have the guts to post a cartoon on FB?




Son-in-law and my daughter do not believe in this shot - I worry about my granddaughter.  They are using the "I'm not against vaccines, just this one" and "we do not want to be part of human experiment" nonsense.

Two days ago, I made nasty (U75) type comment based on one of his posts.

Turns out he is a total snowflake and kept coming back with "and another thing".

I really don't want to alienate him coz I look after the babe while they work.


However, I did post it....and the likes and loves are rushing in!!!

Maybe, most of my fb friends agree with me.

Thanks to @Yossarian for the image!!!!


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 13, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> Son-in-law and my daughter do not believe in this shot - I worry about my granddaughter.  They are using the "I'm not against vaccines, just this one" and "we do not want to be part of human experiment" nonsense.
> 
> Two days ago, I made nasty (U75) type comment based on one of his posts.
> 
> ...



It's a pretty good pic. It's not entirely original, but it's angry and the artwork is slightly reminiscent of Mad Magazine.

As for some membrs of your family not liking it and arguing , they might be the ones doing the alienating, not you.


----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 13, 2021)

krtek a houby said:


> It's a pretty good pic. It's not entirely original, but it's angry and the artwork is slightly reminiscent of Mad Magazine.
> 
> As for some membrs of your family not liking it and arguing , they might be the ones doing the alienating, not you.




His mom came on and scolded him


----------



## nogojones (Aug 13, 2021)




----------



## petee (Aug 13, 2021)

nogojones said:


> View attachment 283424



i get that reference.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Aug 14, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Aug 14, 2021)

From the Social Distancing Marketing Board:


----------



## A380 (Aug 14, 2021)

https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/every_data_table.png


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 14, 2021)

Mation said:


> From the Social Distancing Marketing Board:



This explains what the creature is doing


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 15, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 15, 2021)




----------



## dessiato (Aug 15, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 283725


What does the message mean?


----------



## Sasaferrato (Aug 15, 2021)

My stance has hardened re anti-vax clowns. Send them all to the Isle of Wight, and keep them there.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 15, 2021)

dessiato said:


> What does the message mean?



Do your own research.


----------



## danski (Aug 15, 2021)

Mation said:


> From the Social Distancing Marketing Board:



Unless it's somehow vodka.


----------



## dessiato (Aug 15, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Do your own research.


That's an odd message


----------



## Mation (Aug 15, 2021)

danski said:


> Unless it's somehow vodka.


Hey. Genetic engineering has its plus points


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 15, 2021)

dessiato said:


> That's an odd message




Surely you know the standard reply from the loons, when you question them, is - do your own research?


----------



## petee (Aug 16, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 20, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 20, 2021)




----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Aug 20, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 284393


it's the act responsibly bit that really makes this


----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 20, 2021)




----------



## ddraig (Aug 20, 2021)




----------



## ddraig (Aug 20, 2021)

^^ Some right dickheads saying they're going to chuck their GLC CD's in the bin etc


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Aug 20, 2021)

ddraig said:


> ^^ Some right dickheads saying they're going to chuck their GLC CD's in the bin etc


hilarious to be honest


----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 21, 2021)




----------



## petee (Aug 21, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Aug 21, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Aug 22, 2021)

Old by this pandemic's standards, but I hadn't seen this before 





__





						This PSA Is For Uncles And Aunties Who Wear Their Face Mask Under Their Nose
					





					www.buzzfeed.com
				






> Face masks are supposed to be worn properly as they are a part of a larger "Do it all" approach. This includes — among other things — social distancing, avoiding crowded places, and washing your hands. They are not contraptions that will give you a "small V face".​


​


----------



## MrSki (Aug 22, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Aug 22, 2021)

you can’t fight stupid with stupiderest


----------



## MrSki (Aug 22, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> you can’t fight stupid with stupiderest


Is thick thick cunts okay?


----------



## MrSki (Aug 22, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Is thick thick cunts okay?



DP   & wrong thread. Am a bit pissed and will go to bed now.


----------



## Ax^ (Aug 23, 2021)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Aug 23, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Aug 23, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Aug 23, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


Never mind that- a great many of them will happily consume illegally made, unmonitored drugs made in clandestine labs by criminal gangs and transported here up the arse of some poor sod for good measure.


----------



## l'Otters (Aug 24, 2021)

dessiato said:


> What does the message mean?


It doesn't, it's meaningless, that's kind of the point.


----------



## BigMoaner (Aug 24, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


Brilliant.


----------



## spring-peeper (Aug 24, 2021)

a woman with glasses, whose memory requires a smart phone to read from.


----------



## fishfinger (Aug 25, 2021)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Aug 25, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 25, 2021)

Fun exchange yesterday at one of the test sites...

Bloke: What are you doing here? 
Me: Covid Testing and home test kits

Bloke: Oh right. I am fine thanks. Thought I had Covid a while ago but turns out it was the three grams of coke and bottle of vodka


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 26, 2021)




----------



## LDC (Aug 26, 2021)

Badgers said:


> Fun exchange yesterday at one of the test sites...
> 
> Bloke: What are you doing here?
> Me: Covid Testing and home test kits
> ...



TBF who hasn't woken up one morning in the last 18 or so months and felt like they might have it, and then remembered that they're just hungover?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 26, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 285341


Very similar to the saying about Mensa - 'how do you know if someone is a member of Mensa?  They'll tell you.'  Totally accurate in my experience too.


----------



## petee (Aug 27, 2021)

Badgers said:


> Fun exchange yesterday at one of the test sites...
> 
> Bloke: What are you doing here?
> Me: Covid Testing and home test kits
> ...



so he had covod.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 27, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 27, 2021)

'We've only had five holidays since all this started' says tragic middle class family
					

AN unfortunate middle-class family has only managed a handful of expensive holidays since the pandemic began.




					www.thedailymash.co.uk


----------



## NoXion (Aug 27, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Aug 28, 2021)




----------



## petee (Aug 28, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 285563
> 
> View attachment 285564



killing themselves to own the libs.


----------



## danski (Aug 28, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Aug 28, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 285563
> 
> View attachment 285564


If he really had to go and promote horse medicine as a better alternative to the Covid vaccine, he could at least have had the decency to pick ketamine, and thus give those foolish enough to believe him a good time…


----------



## krtek a houby (Aug 28, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 285563
> 
> View attachment 285564


Killing in the mane of


----------



## Yossarian (Aug 30, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 30, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 285956


The higher death rate in that group is certainly doing the world a favour.  Good on the covid virus.


----------



## petee (Aug 30, 2021)




----------



## gentlegreen (Aug 31, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Aug 31, 2021)

Today's favourite interactions... 

I stopped bothering with testing because they were always negative. 

Why are you wasting all this money on a fake virus instead of sorting out knife crime? 

What you are doing is evil and the devil will judge you. 

I have been told the vaccine will make my mental health worse and I can't cope with that.

I don't want Bill Gates tracking me (a regular)


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 31, 2021)




----------



## NoXion (Aug 31, 2021)

I've been arguing with some ivermectin enthusiasts on Reddit this afternoon. When I linked to an Imperial College of London webpage talking about how double-vaxxed folk are three times less likely to be infected, all he could respond with is snarky comments and insults. I don't understand these people.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Aug 31, 2021)




----------



## smmudge (Aug 31, 2021)

Badgers said:


> What you are doing is evil and the devil will judge you.



Lol does the devil judge much? Thought he'd be fairly easy going.


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 1, 2021)




----------



## Combustible (Sep 1, 2021)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Sep 1, 2021)




----------



## ice-is-forming (Sep 3, 2021)




----------



## Epona (Sep 3, 2021)

ice-is-forming said:


> View attachment 286432



Ugh, sorry, never got on with Ketamine.  Tried a little bit once, never again.  Please let me still be on the left though, I don't want to have to go over to the horse wormer faction of society.  I've worked as a stablehand and I know that shit is for the horses, not for you.


----------



## two sheds (Sep 3, 2021)

Showing my age here that I've never tried it, nor poppers


----------



## Epona (Sep 3, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Showing my age here that I've never tried it, nor poppers



Don't feel like you have missed out.

One of them makes you unable to use your limbs while you hallucinate, the other gives a brief rush and makes your heart pound a bit.  You can achieve both with 30 brisk minutes on a treadmill.


----------



## Calamity1971 (Sep 3, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Showing my age here that I've never tried it, nor poppers


I haven't done any drugs apart from alcohol. 
*Gets kicked off urban. 
Lies , had a joint once and became temporarily paralyzed, thought I walked the dogs when I hadn't , nearly pissed myself and decided I was a stiff. 
Beat that two sheds .


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 3, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Showing my age here that I've never tried it, nor poppers


You've not lived - plenty of time to change that. 

Can't beat an out of body experience while shagging while on ketamine, or sniffing poppers in the local graveyard.


----------



## Epona (Sep 3, 2021)

Horses for courses, I'd far rather do lsd or mushrooms tbh

EDIT: Sorry just realised this was on the Coronavirus meme thread, this is going way off topic - my apologies, I was not checking which thread I was posting on. - probably a conversation for other threads


----------



## Storm Fox (Sep 3, 2021)

Calamity1971 said:


> I haven't done any drugs apart from alcohol.
> *Gets kicked off urban.
> Lies , had a joint once and became temporarily paralyzed, thought I walked the dogs when I hadn't , nearly pissed myself and decided I was a stiff.
> Beat that two sheds .


Alcohol only for me as well, it doesn't beat Calamity1971 but the one time I tried a joint I had a heart arrhythmia and thought my time was up.


----------



## Epona (Sep 3, 2021)

Storm Fox said:


> Alcohol only for me as well, it doesn't beat Calamity1971 but the one time I tried a joint I had a heart arrhythmia and thought my time was up.



Oh that's not good!

I went through a brief period of smoking weed on a daily basis but after a while I realised that I wasn't functioning properly (I value my intelligence but it was turning me into a right fuckwit) so I stopped.

(Just to be clear, this was just my experience of being stoned all the time, I am not saying that it is the same as anyone else's experience, it just didn't work well for me and I wasn't happy with it so I stopped)


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 3, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You've not lived - plenty of time to change that.
> 
> Can't beat an out of body experience while shagging while on ketamine, or *sniffing poppers in the local graveyard*.



Whilst dogging?


----------



## Badgers (Sep 3, 2021)




----------



## Combustible (Sep 3, 2021)

Epona said:


> Horses for courses


Not to be confused with Ivermectin, which makes up courses for horses.


----------



## Epona (Sep 3, 2021)

Combustible said:


> Not to be confused with Ivermectin, which makes up courses for horses.



Always lovely to have someone pry the very obvious and intended joke from my post and present it fresh as their own offering


----------



## T & P (Sep 3, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 4, 2021)

> The rise in people using ivermectin, an anti-parasitic drug usually reserved for deworming horses or livestock, as a treatment or preventative for Covid-19 has emergency rooms “so backed up that gunshot victims were having hard times getting” access to health facilities, an emergency room doctor in Oklahoma said.
> 
> As people take the drug, McElyea said patients have arrived at hospitals with negative reactions like nausea, vomiting, muscle aches, and cramping — or even loss of sight. The scariest one that I’ve heard of and seen is people coming in with vision loss,” the doctor said.
> 
> LINK



And, now over to Alex Jones...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 4, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Sep 4, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Sep 4, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 4, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> View attachment 286706


Beautiful


----------



## Badgers (Sep 5, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Sep 5, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Sep 5, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 6, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 6, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 287010


To be fair, those bananas are clearly rancid and unfit for consumption.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 6, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> To be fair, those bananas are clearly *rancid and* *unfit for consumption*.



Just the sort of rubbish you would expect from a seagull lover. 



> Although overripe bananas may not really look very appetising--the fruit turns soggy while the banana peel may turn black or brown--*they are very good for our health*. An overripe banana is rich in antioxidants, which, according to livestrong.com, is beneficial in preventing or delaying cell damage in one's body.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 6, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Just the sort of rubbish you would expect from a seagull lover.


Bananas with any marks on them are disgusting and only fit for the bin.  If you want to eat rancid food that's up to you.


----------



## kabbes (Sep 6, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Just the sort of rubbish you would expect from a seagull lover.


Ah, the persistent myth of the benefits of antioxidants — one of the most pervasive pieces of pseudoscience of our times.



			https://www.ucl.ac.uk/~ucbtdag/Wenner_2013.pdf


----------



## rubbershoes (Sep 6, 2021)

kabbes said:


> Ah, the persistent myth of the benefits of antioxidants — one of the most pervasive pieces of pseudoscience of our times.
> 
> 
> 
> https://www.ucl.ac.uk/~ucbtdag/Wenner_2013.pdf



Next you're going to be suggesting that the scientists in Laboratoire Garnier are just making up shit about 30% increased volume and more luminescence


----------



## A380 (Sep 6, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Next you're going to be suggesting that the scientists in Laboratoire Garnier are just making up shit about 30% increased volume and more luminescence


And don’t you dare start on the Lindt chocolateteers.


----------



## elbows (Sep 6, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Bananas with any marks on them are disgusting and only fit for the bin.  If you want to eat rancid food that's up to you.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Sep 6, 2021)

People who buy more bananas than they can eat before they go brown


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 6, 2021)

A380 said:


> And don’t you dare start on the Lindt chocolateteers.


Chocolate is a bit shit anyway.  Worse than manky bananas.


----------



## existentialist (Sep 6, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Bananas with any marks on them are disgusting and only fit for the bin.  If you want to eat rancid food that's up to you.


One of the worst things in life is an even vaguely crunchy banana. Blech.

And the very overripe ones make excellent banana bread/cake.


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 6, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> To be fair, those bananas are clearly rancid and unfit for consumption.


Mrs Q makes off bananas into banana cake (which is ace) or puts them in smoothies, still much better than horse dewormer.


----------



## elbows (Sep 6, 2021)

I cant eat bananas anymore anyway, after accidentally discovering that if I avoid them and hard cheese, I have hardly any migraines as opposed to dozens per year.


----------



## dessiato (Sep 6, 2021)

rubbershoes said:


> Next you're going to be suggesting that the scientists in Laboratoire Garnier are just making up shit about 30% increased volume and more luminescence


What annoys me is they don't say what it is 30% more than.


----------



## Elpenor (Sep 6, 2021)

existentialist said:


> One of the worst things in life is an even vaguely crunchy banana. Blech.
> 
> And the very overripe ones make excellent banana bread/cake.


An urbanite, I want to say it was Vixiha used to put overripe banana skins on her skin for some reason or another


----------



## A380 (Sep 6, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Chocolate is a bit shit anyway.  Worse than manky bananas.


Whenever people on here, many people , have said you were a wrong ‘un I’ve always slowly shaken my head. But with that statement it’s as if a veil has been withdrawn from my eyes and I can see they were right all along…


----------



## A380 (Sep 6, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> Mrs Q makes off bananas into banana cake (which is ace) or puts them in smoothies, still much better than horse dewormer.


Nothing like overripe banana and chocolate cake.


----------



## T & P (Sep 6, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Chocolate is a bit shit anyway.  Worse than manky bananas.


Most UK chocolate, and certainly every single cheap chocolate bar out there, is shite. Continental chocolate is lush, and the dark one actually good for you in some ways.

Anyways, I reckon a seagull wouldn't turn down an overripe banana. Could be wrong, though.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 6, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Chocolate is a bit shit anyway.  Worse than manky bananas.


Huge red flag.


----------



## gentlegreen (Sep 6, 2021)

My latest dietary weakness is very strong cocoa made with just boiling water, thickened with chia seed with banana bits.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Sep 6, 2021)

existentialist said:


> One of the worst things in life is an even vaguely crunchy banana. Blech.
> 
> And the very overripe ones make excellent banana bread/cake.



blech to all bananas



A380 said:


> Nothing like overripe banana and chocolate cake.



blech again

and chocolate gives me the - i mean, that is to say it gives me an upset stomach...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 7, 2021)




----------



## Teaboy (Sep 7, 2021)

Basically, all the old Ketamine memes have been repurposed.


----------



## elbows (Sep 7, 2021)

Teaboy said:


> Basically, all the old Ketamine memes have been repurposed.



Deworming the k-hole may lead to temporary ring sting.


----------



## petee (Sep 9, 2021)

the kids are alright


----------



## Badgers (Sep 9, 2021)




----------



## Yuwipi Woman (Sep 10, 2021)

Wasn't sure where to post this bit of nonsense.  This happened at a store called Super Saver.  Its a low end grocery chain where I live.  (It has the cheapest booze in town and tends to cater to a mostly immigrant client-base. ).  A lady came to a person with a child and started harassing them over the fact that they were wearing masks.  We had a mask mandate re-imposed a week ago so this was probably inevitable.  Its kind of bizarre that people feel comfortable doing this.  It wasn't an appropriate thing to do before we were dealing with Covid.









						'Coughing Karen' Gets Canned Due To Online Sleuths
					

A viral video of a woman coughing on mask-wearing customers in a Nebraska grocery store did not end well for  Janene Hoskovec of Scottsdale, AZ.




					videocafe.crooksandliars.com
				




I'm pretty sure if she tried that with me, she wouldn't be walking out on her own power.  I've run into more absolute nutters in the last few months, than I have in several collective years.


----------



## petee (Sep 10, 2021)

Yuwipi Woman said:


> Wasn't sure where to post this bit of nonsense.  This happened at a store called Super Saver.  Its a low end grocery chain where I live.  (It has the cheapest booze in town and tends to cater to a mostly immigrant client-base. ).  A lady came to a person with a child and started harassing them over the fact that they were wearing masks.  We had a mask mandate re-imposed a week ago so this was probably inevitable.  Its kind of bizarre that people feel comfortable doing this.  It wasn't an appropriate thing to do before we were dealing with Covid.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


the whole thing is enraging but this in particular 

_“She laughed and kept saying ‘Look at you, it’s so cute how scared you are!’ By this time I was absolutely livid, trying my best to hold it together in front of my kid,”_


----------



## Yuwipi Woman (Sep 10, 2021)

petee said:


> the whole thing is enraging but this in particular
> 
> _“She laughed and kept saying ‘Look at you, it’s so cute how scared you are!’ By this time I was absolutely livid, trying my best to hold it together in front of my kid,”_



Yep.  Its enraging that she singled out someone with a kid to pull this with.  She's obviously a sadistic bitch.

I don't know what's happened with people around here lately.  I've had a number of incidents of crazy people yelling at and/or threating me in public spaces.  One guy was just a racist loudmouth, yelling at me from across the street, but another has been outright threatening at least three times now.  I haven't stopped going anywhere, but I have slipped the old folder I used to carry into my back pocket when I go out.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 10, 2021)

I am glad she lost her job, fucking nutter.


----------



## Yuwipi Woman (Sep 10, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> I am glad she lost her job, fucking nutter.



It astonishes me that anyone would make her a manager.  My theory is that she was on a ledge any way.  How people act in things like this, is telling on how they act in their home or workplace.


----------



## danny la rouge (Sep 10, 2021)

Yuwipi Woman said:


> It astonishes me that anyone would make her a manager.


The vast majority of managers I’ve had have been sadistic, bullying sociopaths.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 10, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> The vast majority of managers I’ve had have been sadistic, bullying sociopaths.


adn that's just the good ones.

to be fair i have had some great managers in my time. the one i have now is brilliant.


----------



## Teaboy (Sep 10, 2021)

Yuwipi Woman said:


> It astonishes me that anyone would make her a manager.  My theory is that she was on a ledge any way.  How people act in things like this, is telling on how they act in their home or workplace.



Yeah, I think its fair to say the pandemic has really highlighted how many people have only a fingernail grip on their shit.  It's really tipped a lot of people into some very strange and peculiar places.


----------



## editor (Sep 10, 2021)

Yuwipi Woman said:


> Wasn't sure where to post this bit of nonsense.  This happened at a store called Super Saver.  Its a low end grocery chain where I live.  (It has the cheapest booze in town and tends to cater to a mostly immigrant client-base. ).  A lady came to a person with a child and started harassing them over the fact that they were wearing masks.  We had a mask mandate re-imposed a week ago so this was probably inevitable.  Its kind of bizarre that people feel comfortable doing this.  It wasn't an appropriate thing to do before we were dealing with Covid.
> 
> 
> 
> ...




What a fucking freak show.

And goodbye job!


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Sep 10, 2021)

Yuwipi Woman said:


> Wasn't sure where to post this bit of nonsense.  This happened at a store called Super Saver.  Its a low end grocery chain where I live.  (It has the cheapest booze in town and tends to cater to a mostly immigrant client-base. ).  A lady came to a person with a child and started harassing them over the fact that they were wearing masks.  We had a mask mandate re-imposed a week ago so this was probably inevitable.  Its kind of bizarre that people feel comfortable doing this.  It wasn't an appropriate thing to do before we were dealing with Covid.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


pretty sure that's been in the antivax thread here or was it the one in international politics?


----------



## two sheds (Sep 10, 2021)

I posted it in one of them but worth reposting here too


----------



## Yuwipi Woman (Sep 10, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> pretty sure that's been in the antivax thread here or was it the one in international politics?



Didn't see it.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Sep 10, 2021)

Yuwipi Woman said:


> Didn't see it.


no worries
sharing is caring


----------



## Epona (Sep 11, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> The vast majority of managers I’ve had have been sadistic, bullying sociopaths.



So very true.


----------



## fishfinger (Sep 12, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 12, 2021)

fishfinger said:


> View attachment 287927


Brilliant.


----------



## ruffneck23 (Sep 12, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 12, 2021)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 288005


He's clearly very dehydrated judging by the colour of the bottle of piss.


----------



## quiet guy (Sep 12, 2021)

But it's being recycled, it must be good for him.


----------



## neonwilderness (Sep 12, 2021)

Bear Grylls hasn’t aged well


----------



## Calamity1971 (Sep 12, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> He's clearly very dehydrated judging by the colour of the bottle of piss.


That's reminded me off Sean lock (  ) saying, ' you know you've had a good night out when the next day your piss is the same colour as Katie price '


----------



## Calamity1971 (Sep 12, 2021)

neonwilderness said:


> Bear Grylls hasn’t aged well


He preferred to filter piss through a sock full of straw. Cake man's an amateur.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Sep 12, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Sep 13, 2021)

_Fuck you, you fucking selfish fucking shit-banana, you unredeemable ass-caterpillar, you fucking fuck-knob with two fucks for eyes and a literal poop where your heart should be. You want a two-month-old to wind up on a fucking ventilator instead of you, a fucking adult, getting a fucking sore arm for a day? What are you, a pitcher for the Yankees? A fucking concert pianist? An arm model? Get the fuck out of here! Fuck you. Get vaccinated. Fuck. Fuck you!_









						Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
					

Our most-read article of 2021. - - -Originally published September 2, 2021. - - -Hi, if you are reading this essay then congratulations, you are s...




					www.mcsweeneys.net


----------



## dessiato (Sep 13, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> _Fuck you, you fucking selfish fucking shit-banana, you unredeemable ass-caterpillar, you fucking fuck-knob with two fucks for eyes and a literal poop where your heart should be. You want a two-month-old to wind up on a fucking ventilator instead of you, a fucking adult, getting a fucking sore arm for a day? What are you, a pitcher for the Yankees? A fucking concert pianist? An arm model? Get the fuck out of here! Fuck you. Get vaccinated. Fuck. Fuck you!_
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Now there's an angry writer. (But right on the button)


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 13, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> _Fuck you, you fucking selfish fucking shit-banana, you unredeemable ass-caterpillar, you fucking fuck-knob with two fucks for eyes and a literal poop where your heart should be. You want a two-month-old to wind up on a fucking ventilator instead of you, a fucking adult, getting a fucking sore arm for a day? What are you, a pitcher for the Yankees? A fucking concert pianist? An arm model? Get the fuck out of here! Fuck you. Get vaccinated. Fuck. Fuck you!_
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Thought I was reading the script from The Commitments for a moment


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 13, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> _Fuck you, you fucking selfish fucking shit-banana, you unredeemable ass-caterpillar, you fucking fuck-knob with two fucks for eyes and a literal poop where your heart should be. You want a two-month-old to wind up on a fucking ventilator instead of you, a fucking adult, getting a fucking sore arm for a day? What are you, a pitcher for the Yankees? A fucking concert pianist? An arm model? Get the fuck out of here! Fuck you. Get vaccinated. Fuck. Fuck you!_
> 
> 
> 
> ...


A very reasoned argument.


----------



## Epona (Sep 13, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> _Fuck you, you fucking selfish fucking shit-banana, you unredeemable ass-caterpillar, you fucking fuck-knob with two fucks for eyes and a literal poop where your heart should be. You want a two-month-old to wind up on a fucking ventilator instead of you, a fucking adult, getting a fucking sore arm for a day? What are you, a pitcher for the Yankees? A fucking concert pianist? An arm model? Get the fuck out of here! Fuck you. Get vaccinated. Fuck. Fuck you!_
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Used the word fuck more times than I do in a sentence - AND made a good point while doing so ❤️


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Sep 13, 2021)

I wonder if this has been updated as they are murmuring loudly again.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 13, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> _Fuck you, you fucking selfish fucking shit-banana, you unredeemable ass-caterpillar, you fucking fuck-knob with two fucks for eyes and a literal poop where your heart should be. You want a two-month-old to wind up on a fucking ventilator instead of you, a fucking adult, getting a fucking sore arm for a day? What are you, a pitcher for the Yankees? A fucking concert pianist? An arm model? Get the fuck out of here! Fuck you. Get vaccinated. Fuck. Fuck you!_
> 
> 
> 
> ...


#cathartic


----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 14, 2021)




----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 14, 2021)

Imported from the states, protesting outside of hospitals is now a thing.

Canada is in an election process and two of the party's have condoned the protests.

One of my friends, with cancer posted this..


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 14, 2021)

A counterprotester in Toronto - other side of the sign said "I demand my right to be ignorant & selfish."


----------



## ruffneck23 (Sep 14, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Sep 14, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> _Fuck you, you fucking selfish fucking shit-banana, you unredeemable ass-caterpillar, you fucking fuck-knob with two fucks for eyes and a literal poop where your heart should be. You want a two-month-old to wind up on a fucking ventilator instead of you, a fucking adult, getting a fucking sore arm for a day? What are you, a pitcher for the Yankees? A fucking concert pianist? An arm model? Get the fuck out of here! Fuck you. Get vaccinated. Fuck. Fuck you!_
> 
> 
> 
> ...


----------



## josef1878 2.0 (Sep 14, 2021)

I've noticed local news reports of anti-vax dickheads protesting as the youngsters were turning up to do what they chose, now if they are there when I take my 87 year old mum for a booster there will be a problem


----------



## Orang Utan (Sep 14, 2021)

ruffneck23 said:


>



isn’t she joking though?


----------



## ruffneck23 (Sep 14, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> isn’t she joking though?


No, I dont think so


----------



## Orang Utan (Sep 14, 2021)

ruffneck23 said:


> No, I dont think so


i thought she was taking the piss.
i am troubled that it’s hard to tell anymore if it’s truth or satire


----------



## ruffneck23 (Sep 14, 2021)

innit


----------



## Dogsauce (Sep 15, 2021)

Somewhere on the internet someone pointed out that swollen lymph nodes are a known and not particularly scarce side effect and can be in the groin, just a sign of a good immune reaction to the vaccine so not something to worry about. So there is probably a slither of truth in what she said, but twisted into a load of bollocks obvs.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 15, 2021)

Dogsauce said:


> Somewhere on the internet someone pointed out that swollen lymph nodes are a known and not particularly scarce side effect and can be in the groin, just a sign of a good immune reaction to the vaccine so not something to worry about. So there is probably a slither of truth in what she said, but twisted into a load of bollocks obvs.


Orchitis is also a symptom of mumps in adult males, so if this chap did have this that's a possible alternative diagnosis too.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Sep 15, 2021)




----------



## Artaxerxes (Sep 16, 2021)

That subheading has killed me.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 16, 2021)

Snorting and Gargling Iodine to Fight Covid-19 Is a Really Bad Idea
					

It’s the latest anti-vaxxer tactic you should avoid at all costs.




					www.menshealth.com


----------



## T & P (Sep 16, 2021)

I've reached the point when I wonder if we should perhaps cease to discourage them from doing all this shit. Will be better for the rest of us long term if they start removing themselves from the gene pool in droves. Darwinism at its best.


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 16, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> View attachment 288539
> 
> 
> That subheading has killed me.


They seem prepared to take every precaution against Covid except the ones that have been proven to actually work


----------



## danny la rouge (Sep 16, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> View attachment 288462


I like that. Niche but funny.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 16, 2021)

T & P said:


> I've reached the point when I wonder if we should perhaps cease to discourage them from doing all this shit. Will be better for the rest of us long term if they start removing themselves from the gene pool in droves. Darwinism at its best.


The only problem is many of them will have kids and inflict their bullshit 'cures' on them too.  



MickiQ said:


> They seem prepared to take every precaution against Covid except the ones that have been proven to actually work



It does look like they're panicking a bit that they're sitting ducks, so are grasping at anything, no matter how ludicrous, that might protect them other than the vaccine.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 16, 2021)

.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 16, 2021)

there must be part of themselves, and i don't care how covinced they are, that are shitting themselves. that will just make them dig in deeper emotionally/mentally to the wack stuff, make them fall deeper down the rabit hole. but yes, i bet they are get shivers of doubt here and there.


i can remember night fishign an old pond out in sussex that had a few ghost tales linked to it. and of course i don't believe that shit, but trust me it would flash through your mind at 2am when you hear a snapping twig in the dark. they must feel like an invisibile net of social conformity and death threats is closing in on them.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 16, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> they must feel like an invisibile net of social conformity and death threats is closing in on them.


That's perhaps why continuing to wear masks when out and about could have a useful effect - a forceful reminder that the pandemic is still here.  Granted, it won't change the views of those too far gone, but it might make waverers have second thoughts about their hesitancy.


----------



## MickiQ (Sep 16, 2021)

I think the answer to 3 is T-cells but I don't actually know for sure the rest I haven't got a scoobies


----------



## danny la rouge (Sep 16, 2021)




----------



## kabbes (Sep 16, 2021)

T & P said:


> I've reached the point when I wonder if we should perhaps cease to discourage them from doing all this shit. Will be better for the rest of us long term if they start removing themselves from the gene pool in droves. Darwinism at its best.


I’m not totally convinced that vaccine conspiracism is genetic, to be honest


----------



## two sheds (Sep 16, 2021)

Not if they remove themselves from the gene pool it isn't


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Sep 17, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 288694


is this the new dark web?


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Sep 17, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Sep 17, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Sep 17, 2021)




----------



## two sheds (Sep 17, 2021)

I visited my mum's family graveyard with her one time and she pointed out two or three of her brothers/sisters in exactly that way.


----------



## A380 (Sep 21, 2021)

Medical experts in London today were asked if it is time to ease the COVID lockdowns.
Allergists were in favour of scratching it, but Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.
Gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but Neurologists thought the government lacked the nerve.
Obstetricians felt certain everyone was labouring under a misconception, while Ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted.
Many Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while Paediatricians said, "Oh, grow up!"
Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while Radiologists could see right through it.
Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing and Pharmacists claimed it would be a bitter pill to swallow.
Plastic Surgeons opined that this proposal would "put a whole new face on the matter."
Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but Urologists were pissed off by the whole idea.
Anaesthetists thought the whole idea was a gas, and Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.
In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes in politics.


----------



## editor (Sep 21, 2021)

Well played


----------



## petee (Sep 21, 2021)

editor said:


> Well played



the lettering on that bldg is downsideup.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 21, 2021)

petee said:


> the lettering on that bldg is downsideup.


Maybe it's in Australia.


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 21, 2021)

petee said:


> the lettering on that bldg is downsideup.



The truck is part of an ad campaign from this agency.


----------



## petee (Sep 22, 2021)




----------



## blairsh (Sep 22, 2021)




----------



## editor (Sep 22, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Sep 23, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Sep 23, 2021)

editor said:


>


It's waxxed, vaxxed, and replaced my Filofax.


----------



## Johnny Doe (Sep 23, 2021)

Toilet door in local park....before and after I took a key ring to it


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 30, 2021)




----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Sep 30, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 290732


Someone is pumping maga lolz into your feed.


----------



## Yossarian (Sep 30, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 290732



The first tweet was from a month before the first vaccine received emergency approval and people were skeptical of Trump's claims - the shift in her attitude makes more sense than MAGA world's transition from "Trump will deliver vaccines" to "Vaccines are a Democratic plot so I'll protect myself from COVID with horse paste," tbf,


----------



## existentialist (Sep 30, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> The first tweet was from a month before the first vaccine received emergency approval and people were skeptical of Trump's claims - the shift in her attitude makes more sense than MAGA world's transition from "Trump will deliver vaccines" to "Vaccines are a Democratic plot so I'll protect myself from COVID with horse paste," tbf,


Yeah, this. I don't have a problem with people changing their minds in the light of evidence and experience. At least they did.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 30, 2021)

Getting someone to talk covid is a handy tool in the dating game. #redflags


----------



## cupid_stunt (Sep 30, 2021)

Forget the Trump connection, and it's not just changing their mind, they've gone from one extreme to the complete opposite extreme, which is ironic.


----------



## BigMoaner (Sep 30, 2021)

My FrIeNd who OwNs A VaPe ShOp SaID


----------



## elbows (Sep 30, 2021)




----------



## fishfinger (Sep 30, 2021)




----------



## spring-peeper (Sep 30, 2021)

I think if I read one more fb post comparing obesity to covid, I shall scream!!!


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Oct 1, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> I think if I read one more fb post comparing obesity to covid, I shall scream!!!



I didn't get fat because some one coughed on me.

However mask wearing could have prevented it entering my system.


----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 1, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> I didn't get fat because some one coughed on me.
> 
> However mask wearing could have prevented it entering my system.




They are not listening to all that...they are declaring victory.

The government  can't make a nurse get the shot unless the government bans fat people.

My head hurts, and bloodpressure is going up, so I put them all on snooze.

Bitching on here finishes the subject for me.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Oct 1, 2021)

Jet fuel can't melt obese people.


----------



## fishfinger (Oct 1, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> Jet fuel can't melt obese people.


But it does make excellent crackling!


----------



## Gin n tonic (Oct 1, 2021)

Over here we seem to be worse than uk but I don't think there's much in it percentage wise. I'm stuck between a conspiracy and a hard place ;-)


----------



## danny la rouge (Oct 2, 2021)




----------



## Storm Fox (Oct 3, 2021)

Going by the idiot's username he's a bitcoin advocate and probably into freeman of the land stuff too.


----------



## BigMoaner (Oct 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 291028


me me me, i, i, i


----------



## DotCommunist (Oct 3, 2021)

can ones freedom be abominated? Maybe he meant abdication but you can't be abdicated against your will either. Abolition sort of fits.


----------



## Yossarian (Oct 3, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Oct 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> View attachment 291028


Can you get more of a definition for "snowflake" lol


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 5, 2021)




----------



## elbows (Oct 7, 2021)




----------



## keybored (Oct 8, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 8, 2021)




----------



## editor (Oct 12, 2021)




----------



## MickiQ (Oct 12, 2021)

they're getting dafter


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 16, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Oct 16, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Oct 16, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 293004


Don't get it


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Oct 16, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> Don't get it


three masked. one diseased


----------



## MickiQ (Oct 18, 2021)




----------



## Sprocket. (Oct 18, 2021)

I got a text earlier today, allegedly from the NHS.
It said I was now able to use the COVID-19 pass, but if I didn’t apply for it immediately I would be liable to be fined, to avoid this I should click in the link below.
Fuck off.
I hope no confused people fell for it.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 19, 2021)

Sprocket. said:


> I got a text earlier today, allegedly from the NHS.
> It said I was now able to use the COVID-19 pass, but if I didn’t apply for it immediately I would be liable to be fined, to avoid this I should click in the link below.
> Fuck off.
> I hope no confused people fell for it.


You can report it by forwarding it to 7726









						Phishing: Spot and report scam emails, texts, websites and calls
					

How to recognise and report emails, texts, websites, adverts or phone calls that you think are trying to scam you.




					www.ncsc.gov.uk


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 19, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 19, 2021)




----------



## kabbes (Oct 19, 2021)

I’ve been into the office a few times in the last few weeks and it’s just pre-COVID normal.  Masks are 0% visible in the office and face-to-face meetings happen as per normal with as many people in the room as are invited and in the building that day.  The big difference is that about 80% of staff are still working from home, so most people in the meeting are on screen, not in the room.  But those in the room are certainly not putting up perspex bubbles to sit in.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 19, 2021)

kabbes said:


> I’ve been into the office a few times in the last few weeks and it’s just pre-COVID normal.  Masks are 0% visible in the office and face-to-face meetings happen as per normal with as many people in the room as are invited and in the building that day.  The big difference is that about 80% of staff are still working from home, so most people in the meeting are on screen, not in the room.  But those in the room are certainly not putting up perspex bubbles to sit in.



Did you mean to post this on the memes thread?


----------



## kabbes (Oct 19, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> Did you mean to post this on the memes thread?


Probably not.  I don’t tend to notice which thread I’m on, I just respond to what I see


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Oct 19, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 20, 2021)

Just one?


----------



## MrCurry (Oct 20, 2021)




----------



## Numbers (Oct 20, 2021)

There's nothing funny about the current numbers but this did make me laugh.


----------



## Fez909 (Oct 21, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 21, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 21, 2021)




----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 22, 2021)




----------



## 8ball (Oct 22, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 293646


Ok, I need to work harder given my previous performance at working out right-wing memes (was totally thrown by "cat boys" earlier).
I'm going to guess it's a mask thing.  Would have been harder on the bandwidthz thread, mind...


----------



## spring-peeper (Oct 22, 2021)

8ball said:


> Ok, I need to work harder given my previous performance at working out right-wing memes (was totally thrown by "cat boys" earlier).
> I'm going to guess it's a mask thing.  Would have been harder on the bandwidthz thread, mind...




Judging by who posted it on facebook, I'm pretty sure it's about the masks.

Also, I had no clue about the cat boys thing either.  Tbh, I thought it was a British thing and I didn't understand the reference.

Glad you asked


----------



## petee (Oct 22, 2021)

btw, i may have been wrong about that, though still within the ballpark.





__





						Urban Dictionary: catboy
					

boy who wears cat ears




					www.google.com


----------



## Epona (Oct 22, 2021)

Fez909 said:


>



GL with that, had my vaccination in my upper arm near my shoulder


----------



## Badgers (Oct 22, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Oct 22, 2021)




----------



## 8ball (Oct 22, 2021)

petee said:


> btw, i may have been wrong about that, though still within the ballpark.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I’m still not sure about the links to communism.


----------



## petee (Oct 22, 2021)

8ball said:


> I’m still not sure about the links to communism.



oh, it's all one ball of wax. cultural marxism or something.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 22, 2021)

petee said:


> oh, it's all one ball of wax. cultural marxism or something.



surely catboys would go for a ball of wool not a ball of wax?


----------



## 8ball (Oct 22, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> surely catboys would go for a ball of wool not a ball of wax?



Exactly.  The world has gone very strange.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Oct 23, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Oct 23, 2021)

Fez909 said:


>



I want to see video of the moment when someone who paid $1,500 for this finds out that nurses can distinguish human arms from replicas.


----------



## 2hats (Oct 23, 2021)

The man with the golden gut...

'No time to die: An in-depth analysis of James Bond's exposure to infectious agents'
Travel Medicine and Infectious Disease, Volume 44, November–December 2021.


> Global travelers, whether tourists or secret agents, are exposed to a smörgåsbord of infectious agents. We hypothesized that agents pre-occupied with espionage and counterterrorism may, at their peril, fail to correctly prioritize travel medicine. To examine our hypothesis, we examined adherence to international travel advice during the 86 international journeys that James Bond was observed to undertake in feature films spanning 1962-2021. Scrutinizing these missions involved ~3113 min of evening hours per author that could easily have been spent on more pressing societal issues. We uncovered above-average sexual activity, often without sufficient time for an exchange of sexual history, with a remarkably high mortality among Bond's sexual partners (27.1; 95% confidence interval 16.4-40.3). Given how inopportune a bout of diarrhea would be in the midst of world-saving action, it is striking that Bond is seen washing his hands on only two occasions, despite numerous exposures to foodborne pathogens. We hypothesize that his foolhardy courage, sometimes purposefully eliciting life-threatening situations, might even be a consequence of _Toxoplasmosis_. Bond's approach to vector-borne diseases and neglected tropical diseases is erratic, sometimes following travel advice to the letter, but more often dwelling on the side of complete ignorance. Given the limited time Bond receives to prepare for missions, we urgently ask his employer MI6 to take its responsibility seriously. We only live once.


DOI: 10.1016/j.tmaid.2021.102175.

(Seems as good a thread as any for it).


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 24, 2021)

Mentioned in this article









						Leos are most likely to get vaccinated, say Utah officials. Is it written in the stars?
					

Health authorities compared vaccination rates with Zodiac signs, but the results may require further investigation




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## two sheds (Oct 24, 2021)

As a Leo I can confirm this


----------



## Raheem (Oct 24, 2021)

As a Libran, I'm still weighing it up.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 24, 2021)

two sheds said:


> As a Leo I can confirm this


As a Scorpio, I am appalled at the suggestion that I am in a minority


----------



## T & P (Oct 24, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> I want to see video of the moment when someone who paid $1,500 for this finds out that nurses can distinguish human arms from replicas.


You could also use it for stranger wanks so it wouldn’t be a complete waste of money.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 24, 2021)

T & P said:


> You could also use it for stranger wanks so it wouldn’t be a complete waste of money.


One wonders what proportion of the antivaxx mob might be, ah, rather more sexually self-sufficient than the general population at large


----------



## mx wcfc (Oct 24, 2021)

As an Aquarian, I'm second best again.


----------



## two sheds (Oct 24, 2021)

Never mind, I'm sure you tried your best


----------



## petee (Oct 24, 2021)

as a Gemini I'm of two minds about this.


----------



## Raheem (Oct 24, 2021)

As a Cancerian, I'm going to side-step the whole thing.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 24, 2021)

as a capricorn, this is getting on my goat...


----------



## danski (Oct 24, 2021)

I’m Aries and I just wish they’d stop trying to ram this down my throat.


----------



## danski (Oct 24, 2021)

existentialist said:


> One wonders what proportion of the antivaxx mob might be, ah, rather more sexually self-sufficient than the general population at large


I love “sexually self-sufficient”. I am going to use it at work now


----------



## Storm Fox (Oct 24, 2021)

As a Sagittarius; it seems to be bang on target.


----------



## clicker (Oct 24, 2021)

As a piscean , I drowned on the way to the covid jab appointment.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 24, 2021)

As a piscean, I find this all a bit fishy.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 24, 2021)

danski said:


> I love “sexually self-sufficient”. I am going to use it at work now


I stole it, from a rather ferocious Infantry NCO, many years ago. I claim no credit, but it's a fucking excellent insult


----------



## two sheds (Oct 24, 2021)

Not surprised your


danski said:


> I love “sexually self-sufficient”. I am going to use it at work now


when you say "use it at work" ....


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Oct 24, 2021)

existentialist said:


> As a Scorpio, I am appalled at the suggestion that I am in a minority


The accompanying article says you're evil.


----------



## existentialist (Oct 24, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> The accompanying article says you're evil.


🤷‍♂️


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Oct 24, 2021)

am I even still a virgo after receiving the prick?


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Oct 24, 2021)

Shippou-Sensei said:


> am I even still a virgo after receiving the prick?



that might depend where you got it


----------



## Artaxerxes (Oct 24, 2021)

As a Libra I have to admit I'm on the fence


----------



## MrSki (Oct 24, 2021)

Storm Fox said:


> As a Sagittarius; it seems to be bang on target.


Half man half bullshit or horseshit or whatever. 

Got a bow & that is all that really matters.


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 24, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Oct 25, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Oct 27, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Oct 30, 2021)

COVID timeline through the medium of context-free Jimmy Corkhill:


----------



## ddraig (Oct 30, 2021)




----------



## Orang Utan (Oct 30, 2021)

ddraig said:


> View attachment 294837


Why is there a picture of a lion?


----------



## ddraig (Oct 30, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Why is there a picture of a lion?


Don't know!


----------



## 8ball (Oct 30, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Why is there a picture of a lion?



Maybe something to do with catboys.


----------



## Raheem (Oct 30, 2021)

According to my sister-in-law, all men are lion bastards. Maybe that's it.


----------



## 8ball (Oct 30, 2021)

Whoever posted that will be in deep shit when Batman catches up with them.


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 31, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> Why is there a picture of a lion?


In the states there’s a lot of right-wing memes depicted the vaccinated or mask wearers as sheep, and the brave (stupid) unmasked as lions. This sort of thing:


----------



## two sheds (Oct 31, 2021)

No pictures of dead and extremely sick lions then?


----------



## existentialist (Oct 31, 2021)

two sheds said:


> No pictures of dead and extremely sick lions then?


They get eaten by the survivors in this brave new MAGA world.


----------



## Dogsauce (Oct 31, 2021)

two sheds said:


> No pictures of dead and extremely sick lions then?


Plenty of piss-takes out there, such as:


----------



## blairsh (Oct 31, 2021)

Dogsauce said:


> In the states there’s a lot of right-wing memes depicted the vaccinated or mask wearers as sheep, and the brave (stupid) unmasked as lions. This sort of thing:
> 
> View attachment 294880
> View attachment 294879


Jesus fucking Christ.


----------



## MrSki (Oct 31, 2021)




----------



## AmateurAgitator (Nov 1, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 1, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 1, 2021)




----------



## 8ball (Nov 1, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


>



I don’t understand this one.


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 1, 2021)

8ball said:


> I don’t understand this one.



She's apparently an anti-faxxer.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 1, 2021)

8ball said:


> I don’t understand this one.





Yossarian said:


> She's apparently an anti-faxxer.



yes, that.

i was assuming that nobody round here would be too young to know what a fax machine is...


----------



## DaveCinzano (Nov 1, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> yes, that.
> 
> i was assuming that nobody round here would be too young to know what a fax machine is...


----------



## 8ball (Nov 1, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> yes, that.
> 
> i was assuming that nobody round here would be too young to know what a fax machine is...



I’m certainly not that young.  I was just not being terribly bright.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 1, 2021)

8ball said:


> I’m certainly not that young. I was just not being terribly bright.



that's all right then.

i think  i had to explain the concept of fax machines to a young colleague a few years back.  and the function of carbon paper when we found a stash of it...


----------



## two sheds (Nov 1, 2021)

sure that wasn't typewriters?


----------



## 8ball (Nov 1, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> that's all right then.
> 
> i think  i had to explain the concept of fax machines to a young colleague a few years back.  and the function of carbon paper when we found a stash of it...



I’m old enough to still find fax machines quite magical.


----------



## Mation (Nov 1, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> yes, that.
> 
> i was assuming that nobody round here would be too young to know what a fax machine is...


Tsk, silly. That's definitely why _I_ didn't get it.


----------



## petee (Nov 2, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> View attachment 295183



I'm not too young to remember when he had hair.


----------



## quiet guy (Nov 2, 2021)

Count Cuckula said:


> View attachment 295120


Did you not get the Zoom link?


----------



## quiet guy (Nov 2, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 295138


When will they bring out the third marked booster shot?


----------



## two sheds (Nov 2, 2021)

Paid propaganda by the government in the Independent









						The simple measures you can take to keep safe from Covid this winter
					

The crisp, colder days and longer nights signal the onset of winter, and with it the desire to stay cosy indoors.




					www.independent.co.uk
				




See how simple it is to avoid getting coronavirus? Anyone who gets it this winter is obviously being stupid or careless. All you have to do is avoid bus, train and tube (none of them are mentioned) and don't go to work (not mentioned either) in unsafe unventilated conditions.



> But despite the positive steps that have been taken to save lives and protect vulnerable people from the virus, it is vital that we all stick to the simple measures that protect ourselves and those around us.


----------



## spring-peeper (Nov 2, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Paid propaganda by the government in the Independent
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Good advice is always welcome, and I was hoping to learn something.

Open the windows and doors for ten minutes may make sense for someone in a warmer climate, not so much for a country like Canada.

I'll rely on our heating systems to circulate the air.


----------



## two sheds (Nov 2, 2021)

Yes and opening windows in midwinter might be worthwhile when you've got lots of people round but not sure how much it will help a family of four say who are on top of each other the whole time.


----------



## nogojones (Nov 2, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> COVID timeline through the medium of context-free Jimmy Corkhill:



Wow. I never knew Brookside was still running. I presumed  it stopped somewhere in the 90's


----------



## DaveCinzano (Nov 2, 2021)

🤨


----------



## mx wcfc (Nov 2, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Yes and opening windows in midwinter might be worthwhile when you've got lots of people round but not sure how much it will help a family of four say who are on top of each other the whole time.


Most modern offices have no opening windows anyway.  It's to stop office workers throwing themselves off the 20th floor, but it makes a joke of those ministerial pronouncements.


----------



## Elpenor (Nov 2, 2021)

mx wcfc said:


> Most modern offices have no opening windows anyway.  It's to stop office workers throwing themselves off the 20th floor, but it makes a joke of those ministerial pronouncements.


The last 3 offices I’ve worked in have had openable windows, but to be fair I’ve been working only on the ground or first floor and these were all buildings dating from the 80s.


----------



## two sheds (Nov 2, 2021)

employers ignoring the risk of workers throwing themselves out of ground floor windows


----------



## Elpenor (Nov 2, 2021)

I’d be throwing myself onto a grassy knoll which is the same height as the window


----------



## two sheds (Nov 2, 2021)

a grassy knoll


----------



## kabbes (Nov 3, 2021)

Modern offices don’t have openable windows because people opening windows fucks up the air conditioning system. I’ve not worked in a building with openable windows since 2004 (now in my fifth office since then), and that building was a 1970s construction.


----------



## Epona (Nov 4, 2021)

kabbes said:


> Modern offices don’t have openable windows because people opening windows fucks up the air conditioning system. I’ve not worked in a building with openable windows since 2004 (now in my fifth office since then), and that building was a 1970s construction.



In government buildings there is also a bomb protocol where in older windows the glass is coated to prevent it breaking into shards in the event of a bomb going off, and there are also other measures eg. bomb blast curtains where a heavy curtain is anchored at top and bottom in a pelmet type arrangement to catch the glass in case of a bomb - you can't always get to the windows, let alone open them.

(This particular snippet is brought to you from my time working in facilities management in a govt building in Whitehall).


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 4, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Nov 6, 2021)

Lewes bonfire


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 6, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 6, 2021)




----------



## glitch hiker (Nov 6, 2021)

Badgers said:


> Lewes bonfire
> 
> View attachment 295644


Isn't that the Scarecrow level from the Batman Arkham Asylum game?


----------



## Badgers (Nov 6, 2021)

glitch hiker said:


> Isn't that the Scarecrow level from the Batman Arkham Asylum game?


Dunno


----------



## Badgers (Nov 7, 2021)




----------



## tim (Nov 7, 2021)

Elpenor said:


> I’d be throwing myself onto a grassy knoll which is the same height as the window


Yet another librarian poster.


----------



## spring-peeper (Nov 7, 2021)

nice to see some common sense floating around fb


----------



## Ax^ (Nov 9, 2021)




----------



## Ax^ (Nov 9, 2021)




----------



## T & P (Nov 9, 2021)

I reckon the Austrians have found the solution to the antivaxxer problem…









						COVID-19: Vienna brothel offers customers 30 minutes with 'lady of their choice' in exchange for coronavirus jab
					

Vaccination uptake levels in Austria are among the worst in western Europe. Roughly 64% of Austria's population is fully vaccinated and those who are unjabbed are now banned from visiting cafes, restaurants and hairdressers.




					news.sky.com


----------



## mx wcfc (Nov 9, 2021)

T & P said:


> I reckon the Austrians have found the solution to the antivaxxer problem…
> 
> 
> 
> ...


"One of the women who works at Fun Palast, who gave her name as Mina, said ".......

.....And I also think it's a great idea that this is being offered for women, _children_ and of course men."  "


----------



## T & P (Nov 9, 2021)

mx wcfc said:


> "One of the women who works at Fun Palast, who gave her name as Mina, said ".......
> 
> .....And I also think it's a great idea that this is being offered for women, _children_ and of course men."  "


I’m pretty sure (or would like to think) it’d be the parent of the child being jabbed who enjoys the reward of the scheme. ‘30 minutes free if you get the vaccine; bring the wife and kids to get jabbed too, and get an additional 30 minutes’ credit for every additional person vaccinated’. I can’t see many punters taking advantage of such offer though.


----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 9, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 11, 2021)




----------



## Supine (Nov 12, 2021)




----------



## Johnny Doe (Nov 13, 2021)

North Circular Road....nobs


----------



## High Voltage (Nov 13, 2021)

It is OK to vax seems fine

It's the

To say no passport

That doesn't make much sense


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Nov 13, 2021)

High Voltage said:


> It is OK to vax seems fine
> 
> It's the
> 
> ...


----------



## MrCurry (Nov 13, 2021)

High Voltage said:


> It is OK to vax seems fine
> 
> It's the
> 
> ...


I bet It won’t be there a day before someone cuts it in half and disposes of the right hand side.


----------



## editor (Nov 14, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 14, 2021)




----------



## MickiQ (Nov 14, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


>



They also don't commute to work on the London Underground or visit nightclubs both of which are probably related to the fact they don't need a Covid pass


----------



## Epona (Nov 14, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> They also don't commute to work on the London Underground or visit nightclubs both of which are probably related to the fact they don't need a Covid pass



And let's face it, if a lion got on the tube at London Bridge, it would quickly have the train to itself.


----------



## tim (Nov 14, 2021)

Epona said:


> And let's face it, if a lion got on the tube at London Bridge, it would quickly have the train to itself.



I'm sure, as long as Valerie Singleton was holding the leash, nobody would be too perturbed.


----------



## Epona (Nov 14, 2021)

tim said:


> I'm sure, as long as Valerie Singleton was holding the leash, nobody would be too perturbed.




Honestly if I saw Valerie Singleton get on the tube with a lion on a leash I would just assume at that point that I was tripping hard.


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 14, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


>




There's a COVID vaccine for lions and I don't think they'd allow a transfer between zoos without proof it had been administered.

There's also apparently been zero problems in vaccinating lions, so maybe a better caption would have been "Shut up and take your shot like a lion."

_For all of our large, exotic cats — that’s lions, tigers and mountain lions — they’re being positively reinforced with goat’s milk sprayed in their mouths,” Alex Herman, vice president of veterinary services at the Oakland Zoo in California, told me. “They really love it.”_



			https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/zoos-have-started-vaccinating-animals-against-the-coronavirus/2021/10/21/e07d6caa-26d0-11ec-9de8-156fed3e81bf_story.html


----------



## Chilli.s (Nov 15, 2021)

that david kurten, what a dangerous loon


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Nov 15, 2021)

Chilli.s said:


> that david kurten, what a dangerous loon


He was that oddball who stood for the london mayoral election wasn't he, on some odd xtian-type family values platform?


----------



## PR1Berske (Nov 15, 2021)

editor said:


>


Have you seen this one? He looks one month away from living in a cave and proclaiming a new independent republic before turning the gun on himself.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Nov 15, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> Have you seen this one? He looks one month away from living in a cave and proclaiming a new independent republic before turning the gun on himself.



It would have been perfect if he'd accidentally let go of the thing in his hand and smashed the window behind him.


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 15, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> Have you seen this one? He looks one month away from living in a cave and proclaiming a new independent republic before turning the gun on himself.




Looks like he's gone full Manson already.


----------



## Shippou-Sensei (Nov 15, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> Looks like he's gone full Manson already.
> 
> 
> View attachment 296934


Got a lobster tattooed on his forehead?


----------



## pbsmooth (Nov 15, 2021)

Presumably that's how he fights Covid


----------



## LDC (Nov 15, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> Have you seen this one? He looks one month away from living in a cave and proclaiming a new independent republic before turning the gun on himself.



Madchester's very own Ted Kaczynski.


----------



## fishfinger (Nov 15, 2021)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> Madchester's very own Ted Kaczynski.


The Mancunabomber!


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Nov 15, 2021)

More Ian Brown cringe


----------



## keybored (Nov 15, 2021)

Dogsauce said:


> Plenty of piss-takes out there, such as:
> 
> View attachment 294881


----------



## keybored (Nov 15, 2021)

T & P said:


> I reckon the Austrians have found the solution to the antivaxxer problem…
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Looks like it's _no more Mr Nice Guy_...








						Covid: Austria introduces lockdown for unvaccinated
					

Some two million people are told to stay at home amid growing pressure on hospitals as cases surge.



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 18, 2021)

Antivax sticker treated with the respect it deserves.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Nov 18, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> Antivax sticker treated with the respect it deserves.
> 
> View attachment 297310


my debating level, top stuff.


----------



## Cerv (Nov 18, 2021)

This ends pee pee when we all say poo poo


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 18, 2021)

Cerv said:


> This ends pee pee when we all say poo poo


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Nov 18, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


> View attachment 297328


pee poo
pee poo
or 
pee pee
poo poo
???


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 19, 2021)

From 4chan so could be a complete wind up. Or not.


----------



## Johnny Doe (Nov 19, 2021)

Is the frog in a tux smoking a cigar a known thing?


----------



## fishfinger (Nov 19, 2021)

Harry Smiles said:


> Is the frog in a tux smoking a cigar a known thing?


Pepe the frog.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 19, 2021)

fishfinger said:


> Pepe the frog.



I thought it was Farage.


----------



## fishfinger (Nov 19, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> I thought it was Farage.


Close


----------



## PR1Berske (Nov 19, 2021)

Harry Smiles said:


> Is the frog in a tux smoking a cigar a known thing?


Pepe, cooped by the far-right and adjacent types. A symbol to be shared amongst the niche idiots.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 19, 2021)

fishfinger said:


> Close



Indeed, silly me.


----------



## rubbershoes (Nov 19, 2021)

Harry Smiles said:


> Is the frog in a tux smoking a cigar a known thing?



Alt right symbol


----------



## editor (Nov 19, 2021)




----------



## editor (Nov 19, 2021)

> And while I may be fine, what I am not fine with is the Capitan’s new mandate that we must all take this so-called citrus cure. He claims that it’s necessary in order to hang onto our already extremely low chance of surviving this harrowing journey through uncharted waters. He says we must do it for our fellow seaman who truly are our brothers. He says we must do it for the common good. He says it is our noble duty. And to that, I say: Screw. Everybody. I’m in it for me and me only.














						Wake Up, Sailors, Scurvy Is a Hoax
					

Our 19th most-read article of 2021. - - -Originally published September 8, 2021. - - -I’m just a lowly seventeenth-century British sailor, not som...




					www.mcsweeneys.net


----------



## krtek a houby (Nov 19, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> From 4chan so could be a complete wind up. Or not.
> 
> View attachment 297336



"Cheers gentlemen"


----------



## Badgers (Nov 20, 2021)




----------



## Numbers (Nov 20, 2021)

Badgers said:


> View attachment 297466


Free boost when you fill the card?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 20, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 20, 2021)

This is probably some anti-vaxxer nut, but it applies so well to our government.


----------



## T & P (Nov 20, 2021)

Numbers said:


> Free boost when you fill the card?


Free Viagra would be better, and more successful.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 21, 2021)




----------



## gentlegreen (Nov 23, 2021)

I thought he deserved some clicks ...


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 27, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 27, 2021)




----------



## gosub (Nov 27, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> From 4chan so could be a complete wind up. Or not.
> 
> View attachment 297336


viliify and desensitize your mind with porn?  Thats an insightful bit of apophenia


----------



## HAL9000 (Nov 27, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Nov 27, 2021)

gosub said:


> apophenia


A word I didn't know, but should. Despite tip-top sciency-stuff training, if I don't keep an eye on myself, I'm susceptible.









						Definition of APOPHENIA
					

the tendency to perceive a connection or meaningful pattern between unrelated or random things (such as objects or ideas)… See the full definition




					www.merriam-webster.com


----------



## MickiQ (Nov 27, 2021)




----------



## jontz01 (Nov 27, 2021)




----------



## krtek a houby (Nov 27, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> View attachment 298421


Is he, though?


----------



## MickiQ (Nov 27, 2021)

krtek a houby said:


> Is he, though?


I suspect he may be working in our local chip shop


----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 28, 2021)

I don’t know if this is being discussed elsewhere. I tend to ignore GB News.  But a friend forwarded this to me. It’s apparently about how the new variant of concern, omicron, has been invented to bolster power before Christmas.

I only managed about 90 secs but all I’m seeing is a man struggling with his mental health. Is that too simplistic? I don’t find it funny, I just wish he’d get help.


----------



## Chilli.s (Nov 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I only managed about 90 secs but all I’m seeing is a man struggling with his mental health. Is that too simplistic? I don’t find it funny, I just wish he’d get help.


Does he write that drivel himself I wonder. Hopefully he'll never be able to put this behind himself. He is a sick fuck for sure.


----------



## existentialist (Nov 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I don’t know if this is being discussed elsewhere. I tend to ignore GB News.  But a friend forwarded this to me. It’s apparently about how the new variant of concern, omicron, has been invented to bolster power before Christmas.
> 
> I only managed about 90 secs but all I’m seeing is a man struggling with his mental health. Is that too simplistic? I don’t find it funny, I just wish he’d get help.



Batshit.


----------



## LDC (Nov 28, 2021)

Totally bonkers, then I skipped forward to about 7 mins in and he was talking about race and the 'white people' being told to feel guilty or something. Fucked up. No idea how the viewer numbers are for that on TV but bet it gets plenty online.

Absolutely conspiracy theory batshitness on a 'mainstream?' channel.


----------



## rubbershoes (Nov 28, 2021)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> Totally bonkers, then I skipped forward to about 7 mins in and he was talking about race and the 'white people' being told to feel guilty or something. Fucked up. No idea how the viewer numbers are for that on TV but bet it gets plenty online.
> 
> Absolutely conspiracy theory batshitness on a 'mainstream?' channel.



Thank you for your service. You're stronger of stomach than me


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Nov 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I only managed about 90 secs but all I’m seeing is a man struggling with his mental health. Is that too simplistic? I don’t find it funny, I just wish he’d get help.


No, he's just a tit.


----------



## existentialist (Nov 28, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> No, he's just a tit.


it comes across to me as an elongated and superannuated toddler tantrum. "*Why* can't we have nice things?  <foot stomp>"


----------



## MrSki (Nov 28, 2021)




----------



## spitfire (Nov 28, 2021)

Tweet cropped the photo so here it is in its original form.


----------



## stolinski (Nov 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I don’t know if this is being discussed elsewhere. I tend to ignore GB News.  But a friend forwarded this to me. It’s apparently about how the new variant of concern, omicron, has been invented to bolster power before Christmas.
> 
> I only managed about 90 secs but all I’m seeing is a man struggling with his mental health. Is that too simplistic? I don’t find it funny, I just wish he’d get help.



i just looked at his fckn face and scrolled on, life's too short


----------



## LDC (Nov 28, 2021)

spitfire said:


> Tweet cropped the photo so here it is in its original form.
> 
> 
> View attachment 298600



I'm going to have nightmares now.


----------



## spitfire (Nov 28, 2021)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> I'm going to have nightmares now.



lol sorry


----------



## PR1Berske (Nov 28, 2021)

I have no pleasure in sharing this.


----------



## Yossarian (Nov 28, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> I have no pleasure in sharing this.




Not keen on this Train to Busan remake...


----------



## krtek a houby (Nov 29, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I don’t know if this is being discussed elsewhere. I tend to ignore GB News.  But a friend forwarded this to me. It’s apparently about how the new variant of concern, omicron, has been invented to bolster power before Christmas.
> 
> I only managed about 90 secs but all I’m seeing is a man struggling with his mental health. Is that too simplistic? I don’t find it funny, I just wish he’d get help.




Another "awakening" from the team that despises "woke".


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> I have no pleasure in sharing this.




Special performance from the Khazi Chief & a Flock of Sheep.


----------



## LDC (Nov 29, 2021)

More a very low budget Zombie flick. I mean I know diagnosing people from that is not OK, but.... they have the air of _not very well _about them that lot.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## editor (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## editor (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## editor (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Nov 29, 2021)

last page.


----------



## stolinski (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Nov 29, 2021)

stolinski said:


> View attachment 298728



And, this has what to do with coronavirus?


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 29, 2021)

Just needed saying I guess?


----------



## Numbers (Nov 29, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> Just needed saying I guess?


Exactly.


----------



## BigMoaner (Nov 29, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> And, this has what to do with coronavirus?


Qanon: democrats and Illuminati are nonces and eating children. The pipe line to anti vax and COVID denial is a slippery one and as jammed packed as your average butlins swimming pool flume in the height of summer


----------



## PR1Berske (Nov 29, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> And, this has what to do with coronavirus?


The Venn diagram is a circle.


----------



## teqniq (Nov 29, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Nov 29, 2021)

teqniq said:


>




He went down there to take the piss out of the anti-vaxxers - other side of the sign said "I demand my right to be ignorant & selfish."




He's a friend of a friend and I hope I get a chance to buy him a pint for his efforts sometime.


----------



## 8ball (Nov 30, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> He went down there to take the piss out of the anti-vaxxers - other side of the sign said "I demand my right to be ignorant & selfish."
> 
> 
> 
> ...




I was about to suggest he was in on the joke (though I have done so before and been wrong tbf).


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Nov 30, 2021)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> Totally bonkers, then I skipped forward to about 7 mins in and he was talking about race and the 'white people' being told to feel guilty or something. Fucked up. No idea how the viewer numbers are for that on TV but bet it gets plenty online.
> 
> Absolutely conspiracy theory batshitness on a 'mainstream?' channel.


Neil Oliver is seen as a hero in the workplace of someone I know. Apparently he's a very intelligent, courageous man who says what so many people really think.


----------



## editor (Nov 30, 2021)

AmateurAgitator said:


> Neil Oliver is seen as a hero in the workplace of someone I know. Apparently he's a very intelligent, courageous man who says what so many people really think.


Except he's fucking idiot.


----------



## High Voltage (Nov 30, 2021)

There is always that


----------



## PR1Berske (Nov 30, 2021)

Just seen my first use of "scariant" in the wild 😞


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Nov 30, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Nov 30, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 298771


Not. Sure. If. Joke.

Honestly I’ve seen many along those lines.


----------



## danny la rouge (Nov 30, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> Not. Sure. If. Joke.
> 
> Honestly I’ve seen many along those lines.


Yup. That’s the trouble. I’m almost certain this is a joke. But some of the theories are so wild there’s always a slight chance it’s real.  

(And I feel duty bound to point out that AmateurAgitator was not reporting approvingly on his friend’s workplace’s opinion of Neil Oliver, in case anyone thought so. It’s hard to tell from the replies).


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Nov 30, 2021)

editor said:


> Except he's fucking idiot.


Indeed he is


----------



## T & P (Nov 30, 2021)

MrSki said:


>


Darth Vader (or the Galatic Empire) didn't destroy any galaxies though. They did destroy a planet, and blew up a holy city on another, but he was not in charge of either operation.

Inaccurate statements like these are god-sent to the antivaxxers and conspiraloons


----------



## A380 (Nov 30, 2021)




----------



## May Kasahara (Nov 30, 2021)

Sending that one straight to my dad, thanks A380


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Nov 30, 2021)




----------



## HAL9000 (Nov 30, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Dec 1, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 1, 2021)




----------



## kabbes (Dec 1, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


>



For the record, the Greek letter is “omicron”, not “onnicron”. I’ve a feeling that I’m going to be seeing this error a _lot_. It’s the new rouge rogue


----------



## Poot (Dec 1, 2021)

kabbes said:


> For the record, the Greek letter is “omicron”, not “onnicron”. I’ve a feeling that I’m going to be seeing this error a _lot_. It’s the new rouge rogue


It's a variant.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 1, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 1, 2021)




----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 1, 2021)

I've just spotted these idiotic stupidity on FB and, as ever, can't decide if it's genuine or satire.


----------



## existentialist (Dec 1, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> I've just spotted these idiotic stupidity on FB and, as ever, can't decide if it's genuine or satire.



Gotta love the obligatory 33 degree Freemason reference in there


----------



## Yossarian (Dec 1, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> I've just spotted these idiotic stupidity on FB and, as ever, can't decide if it's genuine or satire.




Delta Omicron is also an anagram for Climate Donor, Clarinet Doom, Contrail Demo, Coronal Timed, Menial Doctor, Retail Condom, Erotic Almond, Lard Emoticon, Triad Monocle, and, perhaps most ominously, Rectal Domino.


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 1, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


> I've just spotted these idiotic stupidity on FB and, as ever, can't decide if it's genuine or satire.



Pmsl


----------



## elbows (Dec 1, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> Delta Omicron is also an anagram for Climate Donor, Clarinet Doom, Contrail Demo, Coronal Timed, Menial Doctor, Retail Condom, Erotic Almond, Lard Emoticon, Triad Monocle, and, perhaps most ominously, Rectal Domino.


I like retail condom. Should make it part of the official response to this variant.


----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 1, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> Delta Omicron is also an anagram for Climate Donor, Clarinet Doom, Contrail Demo, Coronal Timed, Menial Doctor, Retail Condom, Erotic Almond, Lard Emoticon, Triad Monocle, and, perhaps most ominously, Rectal Domino.


"Erotic Almond" did a brilliant Peel Session in '94


----------



## Calamity1971 (Dec 1, 2021)

Omicron (B ..) is 
No Crimbo


----------



## two sheds (Dec 1, 2021)

Forgetting xi for the moment, what happened to epsilon, zeta, eta, theta, iota, kappa, lambda and mu? Disappearing variants, I think we should be told. OR have they got all of them in reserve in case omicron doesn't work? Eh? Eh?


----------



## 8ball (Dec 1, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Forgetting xi for the moment, what happened to epsilon, zeta, eta, theta, iota, kappa, lambda and mu? Disappearing variants, I think we should be told. OR have they got all of them in reserve in case omicron doesn't work? Eh? Eh?



I thought they had maybe had a few quiet ones since Delta.  Though I did hear they skipped Xi to avoid upsetting the Chinese, and the Nu variant would have led to endless confusion.


----------



## two sheds (Dec 1, 2021)

You're fooling yourself mate


----------



## 8ball (Dec 1, 2021)

two sheds said:


> You're fooling yourself mate


 They haven't had a few quiet ones since Delta?


----------



## two sheds (Dec 1, 2021)

They're in test tubes in laboratories somewhere, IN RESERVE.

Well I've just done my research and they _say_ that the theta variant was found in Philippines. I still prefer my explanation though. That's just saying where the test tubes are held.


----------



## 8ball (Dec 1, 2021)

two sheds said:


> They're in test tubes in laboratories somewhere, IN RESERVE.



Ah, so maybe Nu to be released at New Year?


----------



## Raheem (Dec 1, 2021)

Alpha delta omicron is an anagram of ΟΑΔ.


----------



## 8ball (Dec 1, 2021)

8ball said:


> I thought they had maybe had a few quiet ones since Delta.  Though I did hear they skipped Xi to avoid upsetting the Chinese, and the Nu variant would have led to endless confusion.



I just checked the above nonsense and it turns out to be true.   and


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 1, 2021)

two sheds said:


> and mu?



maybe it only affects cats?


----------



## High Voltage (Dec 1, 2021)

8ball said:


> Ah, so maybe Nu to be released at New Year?


That's Nu Year, I think you'll find


----------



## kabbes (Dec 1, 2021)

8ball said:


> Nu variant would have led to endless confusion.


I’m never sure if they are intending to use the Ancient Greek or Modern Greek alphabet for these things, but if it’s the latter then it is actually pronounced “ni”, as in “knights who say”.  Because in modern times, upsilon is pronounced “ipsilon”, with the letter υ being effectively a short version of a y.  And this is reflected in how you pronounce the letter ν.  (Or το γράμμα «ν», if you prefer).


----------



## stdP (Dec 1, 2021)

elbows said:


> I like retail condom. Should make it part of the official response to this variant.



...as opposed to home-made condom, which is what Boris Johnson puts his faith in?


----------



## 8ball (Dec 1, 2021)

Just had a link come up for Amazon’s “last
minute Christmas deals”!

Wondering what they know that we don’t.


----------



## 8ball (Dec 1, 2021)

kabbes said:


> I’m never sure if they are intending to use the Ancient Greek or Modern Greek alphabet for these things, but if it’s the latter then it is actually pronounced “ni”, as in “knights who say”.  Because in modern times, upsilon is pronounced “ipsilon”, with the letter υ being effectively a short version of a y.  And this is reflected in how you pronounce the letter ν.  (Or το γράμμα «ν», if you prefer).



They still would have been printing it as the 'Nu variant' in newspapers etc.


----------



## kabbes (Dec 1, 2021)

It’s probably intended as Ancient Greek anyway, like in maths


----------



## souljacker (Dec 1, 2021)

8ball said:


> Wondering what they know that we don’t.


That we are all mugs who believe shit like that? xmas shopping should be done on xmas eve on the way to the pub.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 2, 2021)




----------



## RainbowTown (Dec 2, 2021)

Creepy 1999 video game 'Omikron' goes viral amid Omicron variant fears
					

As a new Covid strain called Omicron threatens the world, internet users have uncovered a creepy 1999 video game called 'Omikron'.




					www.hitc.com
				





Apparently, it's David Bowie's fault. He warned us, you know..........


----------



## two sheds (Dec 2, 2021)

Ground Control to Omicron?


----------



## Raheem (Dec 2, 2021)

Omicronson, surely?


----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 3, 2021)

Absolutely insane.


----------



## danski (Dec 3, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> Absolutely insane.
> 
> View attachment 299196


Can someone photoshop a propeller on top of his hat please? Seems fitting.


----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 3, 2021)

Don't ask him about the steroids he's likely addicted to.


----------



## Yossarian (Dec 3, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> Absolutely insane.
> 
> View attachment 299196



There don't seem to be many takers.


----------



## Espresso (Dec 3, 2021)

And it would be such a tragedy if the likes of Mr Huff didn't get to reproduce.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 3, 2021)

"ASK ME ABOUT MY SPERM"

Its not the most subtle of approaches to dating. I wonder how often he gets maced.


----------



## editor (Dec 3, 2021)

RainbowTown said:


> Creepy 1999 video game 'Omikron' goes viral amid Omicron variant fears
> 
> 
> As a new Covid strain called Omicron threatens the world, internet users have uncovered a creepy 1999 video game called 'Omikron'.
> ...





> “Wake up. People of Omikron and it’s corrupt government are lulling you to sleep in order to control you better. They have transformed you into puppets that are manipulated by Icks and the Demons



How COULD HE KNOW?!


----------



## 2hats (Dec 3, 2021)

editor said:


> How COULD HE KNOW?!
> 
> 
> > They have transformed you into puppets that are manipulated by Ickes


FTFY.


----------



## MickiQ (Dec 3, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> "ASK ME ABOUT MY SPERM"
> 
> Its not the most subtle of approaches to dating. I wonder how often he gets maced.


Probably more often than he gets laid


----------



## elbows (Dec 3, 2021)

"ask me if my brains are in my bollocks and I blow them out every night".


----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 3, 2021)

elbows said:


> "ask me if my brains are in my bollocks and I blow them out every night".



Isn't that why No Nut November is a thing?


----------



## Fez909 (Dec 3, 2021)

Fez909 said:


>



Holy shit, someone actually did it.









						Italian man tries to dodge Covid vaccine wearing fake arm
					

Anti-vaxxer is facing charges of fraud after turning up for jab with silicone arm in Biella




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## MickiQ (Dec 3, 2021)

Fez909 said:


> Holy shit, someone actually did it.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Gotta admit that's funny, totally bonkers but definitely funny.


----------



## Logan^B (Dec 3, 2021)

On another note

Why doesn't the social anarchy revolution conspiracy get more of a mention online these days?

I was told in late 1992 and again in early 2002 that covid19 virus outbreak was planned by anarchists to help led to the collapse of all forms of government. And a system of society based on social anarchy would replace the government.

The hardcore leftist anarchists believe the whole covid19 virus pandemic is the perfect storm to destabilise the ruling classes.

Things will get bad real bad, millions will die but for the greater good.

The vaccines aren't as good as the ruling elite make out. The population will keep getting sick and the frail will die on a unprecedented scale.  rioting will be widespread and looting eventually  becoming the new norm as the banking system grinds to a halt. ATMs will stop spitting out cash. The lights will go out. The sharemarket will become worthless.

Essential services will fail, law enforcement will lose control and the masses will riot. the collapse is unavoidable. 

However rising from the smouldering ashes will be the young, who will embrace this new opportunity and gallantly face  the challenges of  creating a new society free of a ruling elite blah blah blah. You know a world based on social anarchy principles.  

The anarchists will rebuild everything necessary , hospitals schools universities powerplants retail outlets the whole kit and Ka poodle, But everyone will be equal. The new world will be fair, the poor no longer going without.

A member of Anonymous hacktivist group told me that pretty much 20 years ago.

The revolution will happen. Viva the revolution, Viva Covid19.

 How that will actually happen is a mystery to me

Pretty f#@ken out there LOL


----------



## A380 (Dec 3, 2021)

Logan^B said:


> On another note
> 
> Why doesn't the social anarchy revolution conspiracy get more of a mention online these days?
> 
> ...


Look out danny la rouge and Pickman's model  he's on to you!


----------



## Calamity1971 (Dec 3, 2021)

Logan^B said:


> was told in late 1992 and again in early 2002 that covid19 virus outbreak was planned


28 years planning? These anarchists don't drag their heels.


----------



## BCBlues (Dec 3, 2021)

A380 said:


> Look out danny la rouge and Pickman's model  he's on to you!



Dont tell him your name Pike


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 3, 2021)

A380 said:


> Look out danny la rouge and Pickman's model  he's on to you!


It’s too late. We’ve unleashed omicron and there’s nothing you can do!


----------



## A380 (Dec 3, 2021)

Calamity1971 said:


> 28 years planning? These anarchists don't drag their heels.


It would have been three years ago but they couldn't get a stall to disseminate the virus from...


----------



## two sheds (Dec 3, 2021)

A380 said:


> It would have been three years ago but they couldn't get a laboratory to disseminate the virus from...


CFU: now it starts to make sense


----------



## elbows (Dec 3, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> It’s too late. We’ve unleashed omicron and there’s nothing you can do!


Has the Omicron animal host been tracked down to penguins?


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 3, 2021)

elbows said:


> Has the Omicron animal host been tracked down to penguins?


Woah, good reference!


----------



## quiet guy (Dec 3, 2021)

Calamity1971 said:


> 28 years planning? These anarchists don't drag their heels.


It's all in the long game.


----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 3, 2021)

Calamity1971 said:


> 28 years planning? These anarchists don't drag their heels.


27 years deciding on the make up of the committee that would decide what colour to paint it.


----------



## MrSki (Dec 4, 2021)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 5, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 5, 2021)




----------



## existentialist (Dec 5, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> View attachment 299449


I am sure the efficacy would be improved by the addition of iron filings and ground glass...


----------



## Johnny Doe (Dec 5, 2021)

Idiot patrol....


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 6, 2021)




----------



## platinumsage (Dec 6, 2021)

A bit of a weird advert from the NHS here:


----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 6, 2021)

Didn't know where to post this , but here will do..

Was just on a train listening to a woman saying ( il paraphrase) that Bill Gates  and all are sacrificing kids from Africa to do something ( test vaccines I presume ) , when I went to get off I told.her she shouldn't be watching you tube for her info, sigh


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 6, 2021)

ruffneck23 said:


> Didn't know where to post this , but here will do..
> 
> Was just on a train listening to a woman saying ( il paraphrase) that Bill Gates  and all are sacrificing kids from Africa to do something ( test vaccines I presume ) , when I went to get off I told.her she shouldn't be watching you tube for her info, sigh



Now I understand why everyone wears earphones down there.


----------



## T & P (Dec 7, 2021)




----------



## elbows (Dec 7, 2021)

Or The Fucking Virus!


----------



## Numbers (Dec 7, 2021)

ruffneck23 said:


> Didn't know where to post this , but here will do..
> 
> Was just on a train listening to a woman saying ( il paraphrase) that Bill Gates  and all are sacrificing kids from Africa to do something ( test vaccines I presume ) , when I went to get off I told.her she shouldn't be watching you tube for her info, sigh


My sister in law is in this camp, I love her but she’s a fucking idiot.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 8, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 8, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 8, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> Absolutely insane.
> 
> View attachment 299196


No thanks you absolute wanker


----------



## existentialist (Dec 8, 2021)

Artaxerxes said:


> Absolutely insane.
> 
> View attachment 299196


TBF, people have said the same about many things over the years. The only reason we remember Tulip Mania, the South Sea Bubble, the California Gold Rush, et al is that people actually invested in them. I don't think Aubrey Huff's jizz is going to find itself enshrined in history, even as a cautionary tale 🇭🇲


----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 8, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 8, 2021)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 8, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 8, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> View attachment 299851


Let’s get ready to rumble!


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 8, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Let’s get ready to rumble!
> 
> View attachment 299854


Must admit while I don't watch telly, I was surprised at how direct they were on this.  Good on them in my view.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 8, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Must admit while I don't watch telly, I was surprised at how direct they were on this.  Good on them in my view.



They’ve been doing that stuff for years. I think it’s only being noticed now because there’s literally nobody else doing anything. Sir Personality Void is worse than useless. And had his own Christmas party anyway so can’t say too much.


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 8, 2021)

man goes from a probably rightly cultural icon to a absoloute cringe fest in just one pandemic


----------



## bellaozzydog (Dec 8, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> man goes from a probably rightly cultural icon to a absoloute cringe fest in just one pandemic




Conspiracy slides quite well into rockstar/celeb minds, they ain’t necessarily that smart, unlikely to have any depth of academic scientific study under their belt and no fuxker around them will tell them they are talking a load of old pony 

Instead they have access to a huge audience who nod and ooh their every utterance 

Stand down hirsute melesphile Guitar astrophysicists and things can only get better particle physics professors


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 8, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> Sir Personality Void


No need to get personal.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 8, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> No need to get personal.


Sorry: Sir Void.


----------



## editor (Dec 8, 2021)

Party time!


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 8, 2021)

editor said:


> Party time!



sorry, i'm a bit fussy who i socialise with...


----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 8, 2021)

It's going to be off the chain


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 9, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 10, 2021)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 11, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 11, 2021)

the mayor of greenwich tweetered something promoting local vaccinations

this exchange followed


----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 12, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 12, 2021)




----------



## keybored (Dec 12, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> man goes from a probably rightly cultural icon to a absoloute cringe fest in just one pandemic



Cocaine is a hell of a drug.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 13, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 13, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 13, 2021)




----------



## editor (Dec 13, 2021)




----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 13, 2021)

Dogsauce said:


> In the states there’s a lot of right-wing memes depicted the vaccinated or mask wearers as sheep, and the brave (stupid) unmasked as lions. This sort of thing:
> 
> View attachment 294880
> View attachment 294879


For those who don’t mind a bit of dark schadenfreude, a nice compilation of ‘Lions’ who didn’t fare so well.


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 13, 2021)

keybored said:


> Cocaine is a hell of a drug.



he loves that own brain meme. so damn special


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 13, 2021)

a vacinne taken by millions, tested by top scientists: STFU, give me instead a mould-treatment dip instead:









						Doctors warn against anti-vaccine ‘detox’ cure using baking soda and pesticide
					

Anti-vaxxers are hawking borax baths as a way to ‘detox’ from the Covid jab, but the method does not work and might be dangerous




					www.independent.co.uk


----------



## MickiQ (Dec 13, 2021)

Who the  Fuck makes this shit up ??? why are they not rounded up and put in padded cells ???


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Dec 13, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> Who the  Fuck makes this shit up ??? why are they not rounded up and put in padded cells ???


Don't google black salve then, and I'll spare you the Urine Therapy quotes and number 2 treatments that are going on out there.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 13, 2021)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> I'll spare you the Urine Therapy quotes



someone is taking the piss...


----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 14, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> Who the  Fuck makes this shit up ??? why are they not rounded up and put in padded cells ???


Tbh, if anti-vaxx twats believe that they can take a jab and then cleanse themselves of it using some kind of quackery it‘s not the worst thing to happen.


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 14, 2021)

MickiQ said:


> Who the  Fuck makes this shit up ??? why are they not rounded up and put in padded cells ???


Trying their best to get rounded up by a deadly virus  tho


----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 14, 2021)

It's too frivolous for the other threads, but I was cheered by this today.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 14, 2021)

<awaits the outcry from the loons>

Big tech in bed with big pharma.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 14, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> <awaits the outcry from the loons>
> 
> Big tech in bed with big pharma.


To be fair it made me vomit in my mouth a little and definitely has the potential to push me loonward.


----------



## T & P (Dec 14, 2021)




----------



## HoratioCuthbert (Dec 14, 2021)

Orkney Covid-denial group O I unite are all raging in the facebook comments because Nicola.... wait......hasn't.... cancelled christmas. "LOTS OF PEOPLE ARE GOING TO BE LEFT ALONE THIS YEAR AGAIN, THIS CAN'T GO ON"  

Fuck me it's funny.


----------



## MrSki (Dec 14, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 14, 2021)

HoratioCuthbert said:


> Orkney Covid-denial group O I unite are all raging


Which area are they mostly to be found in..?


----------



## Epona (Dec 14, 2021)

I'm actually quite chuffed to see news reports of queues for vaccines since it's been opened up to more people eligible - although it might prove difficult in terms of logistics for vaccination centres, seeing people keen to get their boosters is a really cheering thing.

It's important to remember when we are feeling down about some lunacy we've read online, that actually most people want to get their vaccines.

(EDIT: I am trying to do as little as possible that will put me at risk between now and Xmas as I want to see my elderly parents for the day - I don't know how many years we will have left to do this, and it is important to me especially since I didn't see them at all for over 18 months - but am planning to do some volunteer vaccination centre shifts after Xmas Day)


----------



## HoratioCuthbert (Dec 14, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> Which area are they mostly to be found in..?
> 
> View attachment 300849


Lol sadly not contained in the Parish of Twatt, many in Strum nis including this guy who claims he knows no one that had covid despite us all knowing his son was on the fishing boat that caused the cluster that low key hit national news in Scotland. A rake of us went on the AIS shipping tracker website that weekend


----------



## MrSki (Dec 15, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Dec 15, 2021)

Epona said:


> I am trying to do as little as possible that will put me at risk between now and Xmas as I want to see my elderly parents for the day


This ^ 

I have a bit of a creeping dread that am going to get it before finishing for Winterval  had over 700 people at the testing station yesterday, many of whom were not masked or distancing.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 15, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 15, 2021)

This is reassuring.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 15, 2021)




----------



## 2hats (Dec 15, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 15, 2021)

Noted on twitter:



> We’re about two days from Boris Johnson wearing dreadlocks and singing “We’re Jabbing”.


----------



## platinumsage (Dec 16, 2021)




----------



## ruffneck23 (Dec 16, 2021)




----------



## editor (Dec 16, 2021)




----------



## ddraig (Dec 16, 2021)

ruffneck23 said:


> View attachment 301084


Nice one, wondered what that ring was for!


----------



## dessiato (Dec 16, 2021)

Epona said:


> …
> 
> (EDIT: I am trying to do as little as possible that will put me at risk between now and Xmas as I want to see my elderly parents for the day - I don't know how many years we will have left to do this, and it is important to me especially since I didn't see them at all for over 18 months - but am planning to do some volunteer vaccination centre shifts after Xmas Day)





Badgers said:


> This ^
> 
> I have a bit of a creeping dread that am going to get it before finishing for Winterval  had over 700 people at the testing station yesterday, many of whom were not masked or distancing.


We’re the same. My F-I-L has been in hospital for over a month, the likelihood is that he will not come out, but how long he has is very debatable.

We would like to organise things so he can go home, which means putting lots of changes in place to make it possible. We can’t let him be alone and lonely as his life starts to ebb away. 

My step-mother is steadily deteriorating with MS, she’s now bed-bound, and has only one arm that works, and that is very limited. She can’t get dressed, shower, or go to the toilet by herself. How long we’ve got her for is anybody’s guess.

We really need to get to the U.K. to see these before they’re not here to see.

Then one of my wife’s adult students is unable to come to class, her son has Covid.

I hope we get there, and back before more shit hits the fan, and it will.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 16, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 16, 2021)




----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 17, 2021)




----------



## blairsh (Dec 17, 2021)

Fuckin hell.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 17, 2021)

Jesussufferingfuck


----------



## editor (Dec 17, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 17, 2021)




----------



## editor (Dec 17, 2021)




----------



## l'Otters (Dec 17, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 301313


that's not a 34B.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 17, 2021)

l'Otters said:


> that's not a 34B.


No, a 34B is a _very_ soft pencil.  I like a 5 or 6B for drawing.


----------



## cuppa tee (Dec 17, 2021)

....from the guardian....





.....how on earth is this proper reporting, as if the cumulative  number of deaths is gonna start falling


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 17, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 301313



yes, but he does look a right tit...


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 17, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 17, 2021)




----------



## editor (Dec 17, 2021)




----------



## 8ball (Dec 18, 2021)

editor said:


> View attachment 301362



That’s like an odd satire on surgery in Victorian times.

Or in 5 years’ time, the way things are going.


----------



## spring-peeper (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Dec 18, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 301453


To what?


----------



## krtek a houby (Dec 18, 2021)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 301393



And that t-shirt


----------



## spring-peeper (Dec 18, 2021)

Mation said:


> To what?




Sorry, I do not understand your question.


----------



## existentialist (Dec 18, 2021)

Mation said:


> To what?


From being "sheeple", I expect.


----------



## Orang Utan (Dec 18, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> Sorry, I do not understand your question.


What are they going to wake up to?
You’ve posted an antivax meme by the looks of it


----------



## _Russ_ (Dec 18, 2021)

So?, it wouldnt be the first in here, perhaps he is being Ironic


----------



## Yossarian (Dec 18, 2021)

Orang Utan said:


> What are they going to wake up to?
> You’ve posted an antivax meme by the looks of it



Hopefully, as with other anti-vax memes that have appeared on this thread, it has been placed here for people to point and laugh at.

I like how the person who has "woken up" appears to be striding confidently on a path that will take them off the edge of a cliff.


----------



## A380 (Dec 18, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 301453


Ironic how the chap on the bottom left (a lion?) is heading straight for a cliff edge…


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## editor (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## krtek a houby (Dec 18, 2021)

_Russ_ said:


> So?, it wouldnt be the first in here, perhaps he is being Ironic


Is that what you do?


----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## Mation (Dec 18, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


>





Not entirely convinced that that audio matches the video, however hatstand Piers Corbyn is...



cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 301485


Why is there a beluga whale in the background?


----------



## LDC (Dec 18, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


>




He's proper fucked in the head. And a proper dangerous fool.


----------



## elbows (Dec 18, 2021)

Mation said:


> Not entirely convinced that that audio matches the video, however hatstand Piers Corbyn is...



I've never bothered to hear his voice before so I cant comment on that aspect of authenticity.

But probably a delay between him speaking and the sound coming out of the PA may be what is making it seem wrong to you, his lips are out of sync as a result.


----------



## Mation (Dec 18, 2021)

elbows said:


> I've never bothered to hear his voice before so I cant comment on that aspect of authenticity.
> 
> But probably a delay between him speaking and the sound coming out of the PA may be what is making it seem wrong to you, his lips are out of sync as a result.


I don't know his voice either. His lips are definitely out of sync, and that could absolutely be for the reasons you say. It's just that what it seems he says is so batshit that I wonder if it's real.

Are things _that _bad?


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 18, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> View attachment 301453


other than the shite writing, that does kinda feel a bit like life now on the covid treadmill. shame the writing ruins it


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 18, 2021)

Mation said:


> I don't know his voice either. His lips are definitely out of sync, and that could absolutely be for the reasons you say. It's just that what it seems he says is so batshit that I wonder if it's real.
> 
> Are things _that _bad?


he just yabbers what other loons want to hear; a shambolic, lunatic grifter. he's a degenerate. he's already got caught taking bungs in set ups.

the one that got to me more than nearly all the memes i've seen etc is of him walking through tube carraiges with his fellow Einsteins, ripping each and every covid sign off. i dunno why it got to me so much, maybe cos i was scared stiff at hte time living at my folks and wiping out my mum with it.


----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## spring-peeper (Dec 18, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


>





What are they chanting?


----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 18, 2021)

Don't normally see the fuzz let themselves be surrounded like that. Rest of em must be off keeping statues safe


----------



## clicker (Dec 18, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> What are they chanting?


Who's free we're free.

Shame on you.

Please stand together.

Eta ...I think.


----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 18, 2021)




----------



## Chilli.s (Dec 18, 2021)

spring-peeper said:


> What are they chanting?



I think it 's
"We're not very clever"?


----------



## danski (Dec 19, 2021)

Nicked from b3ta.com


----------



## PR1Berske (Dec 19, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 19, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


>




Let's hope Piers Corbyn ends up in prison over Christmas, ideally one with a high level of covid cases.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 19, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 19, 2021)

Let's hope Piers Corbyn ends up in prison over Christmas, ideally one with a high level of covid cases.  

Or if he’s surrounded by inmates who have lost close people. See if he’d do his rap then.

Wonder if he’d get time for that? Doubt it.


----------



## _Russ_ (Dec 19, 2021)

BigMoaner said:


> Let's hope Piers Corbyn ends up in prison over Christmas, ideally one with a high level of covid cases.
> 
> Or if he’s surrounded by inmates who have lost close people. See if he’d do his rap then.
> 
> Wonder if he’d get time for that? Doubt it.


I think you can get 4 years for inciting violence and arson is looked on as very serious


----------



## quiet guy (Dec 19, 2021)




----------



## Badgers (Dec 19, 2021)

Well worth looking into this they are giving out £300 for staying in at Christmas if you register and they can track you for the holiday period 

gov.uk
Stay In Help Out Scheme.
£300 Stay In Help Out Scheme Reward for all who stay indoors.
Fill out form below.






						Coronavirus (COVID-19): guidance and support
					

Find information on coronavirus, including guidance and support.




					www.gov.uk
				





			https://external-preview.redd.it/vxPXEGgL4v8mCGw06IFGsmJNtqWQg-z60xQQ79dHKPY.jpg?auto=webp&s=db7685262e9b352a4888e547f52a244e2ea2cb9f


----------



## petee (Dec 19, 2021)

(can't find the US coronavirus thread)

excuse me while i don;t cry.

_State Sen. Doug Ericksen, a stalwart conservative voice in the Legislature, former leader of Donald Trump’s presidential campaign in Washington and an outspoken critic of COVID-19 emergency orders, has died, his family said Saturday. He was 52._









						Washington state Sen. Doug Ericksen dies; sought treatment for COVID
					

Ericksen, who served in the Legislature for more than two decades, said last month that he tested positive for the coronavirus, although his cause of death was not immediately confirmed on Saturday.




					www.seattletimes.com


----------



## MrSki (Dec 19, 2021)




----------



## krtek a houby (Dec 19, 2021)

Logan^B said:


> On another note
> 
> Why doesn't the social anarchy revolution conspiracy get more of a mention online these days?
> 
> ...



Any updates?


----------



## editor (Dec 20, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Dec 20, 2021)

Not sure where this leaves us Gen Xers…


----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 20, 2021)




----------



## belboid (Dec 20, 2021)




----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 20, 2021)




----------



## A380 (Dec 21, 2021)




----------



## Storm Fox (Dec 21, 2021)

Dogsauce said:


> View attachment 302032


If you Anti-Vaxxer of choice has been taking Ivermectin then I think they also include "always pooping"


----------



## editor (Dec 21, 2021)

'Spherical cattle'


----------



## klang (Dec 21, 2021)

PR1Berske said:


>



Police should at least be given proper FFP2 masks when deployed to such protests. It's a dangerous crowd.


----------



## A380 (Dec 21, 2021)

klang said:


> Police should at least be given proper FFP2 masks when deployed to such protests. It's a dangerous crowd.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 21, 2021)




----------



## klang (Dec 21, 2021)

A380 said:


> View attachment 302119


just put a similar order in for my local black bloc


----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 21, 2021)

klang said:


> Police should at least be given proper FFP2 masks when deployed to such protests. It's a dangerous crowd.


I have realised in recent years that a key reason I could never have been a policeman is that a lot of it is "clean-up on aisle three" ...


----------



## klang (Dec 21, 2021)

gentlegreen said:


> I have realised in recent years that a key reason I could never have been a policeman is that a lot of it is "clean-up on aisle three" ...


not wanting to be a bastard has always been the main reason for me.


----------



## elbows (Dec 21, 2021)

editor said:


> View attachment 302117
> 
> 'Spherical cattle'


Borrowed heavily from Brass Eye!


----------



## A380 (Dec 21, 2021)

klang said:


> just put a similar order in for my local black bloc


This might be a better look:


----------



## editor (Dec 21, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Dec 21, 2021)




----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 21, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 302162


_Children defy gloomy lollipop crossing people by running into traffic_


----------



## kabbes (Dec 21, 2021)

"Is this proof antibiotics can make you fat?"   Possibly the most Daily Mail headline ever.


----------



## souljacker (Dec 21, 2021)

What could it possibly mean when the Queen cancels her xmas at Sandringham? Could it mean that maybe the Queen has cancelled her xmas at Sandringham? Thank god Richard Kay is around to explain because I have no idea what it could possibly mean when the Queen cancels her xmas at Sandringham.


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 21, 2021)

souljacker said:


> What could it possibly mean when the Queen cancels her xmas at Sandringham? Could it mean that maybe the Queen has cancelled her xmas at Sandringham? Thank god Richard Kay is around to explain because I have no idea what it could possibly mean when the Queen cancels her xmas at Sandringham.


I thought it was something to do with hoovering. Or space travel.


----------



## Fez909 (Dec 21, 2021)

‘Unbelievably selfish’ man receives Covid vaccine nine times in one day
					

People who did not want to get vaccine ‘took advantage’ of man’s financial situation by paying him to have their jab




					www.independent.co.uk
				




For a split second I wondered if this might be TopCat


----------



## editor (Dec 21, 2021)




----------



## TopCat (Dec 21, 2021)

Fez909 said:


> ‘Unbelievably selfish’ man receives Covid vaccine nine times in one day
> 
> 
> People who did not want to get vaccine ‘took advantage’ of man’s financial situation by paying him to have their jab
> ...


I want another jab ASAP and given I have no money yes please pay me to take yours.


----------



## souljacker (Dec 21, 2021)

editor said:


>



Major pearoast but I think it might be my favourite meme of the whole pandemic so love watching again.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 22, 2021)




----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 22, 2021)




----------



## MrSki (Dec 23, 2021)




----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 23, 2021)

I don't know  how I left it so late to search for this ...


----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 23, 2021)

I was prompted by one of the "virus doesn't exist" idiots ...


----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 23, 2021)

I was thinking of getting my sister to put a laptop in my place at dinner LOL


----------



## Badgers (Dec 23, 2021)




----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 23, 2021)




----------



## gentlegreen (Dec 23, 2021)




----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 23, 2021)

gentlegreen said:


> I don't know  how I left it so late to search for this ...



radiohead.


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Dec 23, 2021)




----------



## Epona (Dec 24, 2021)

gentlegreen said:


> View attachment 302594



I like to think that in the future this will be incomprehensible to future generations until granny reminds everyone about the whole COVID thing that happened in the early '20s and regales everyone with stories about doing lateral flow tests, lockdowns, and face masks.  Everyone will nod and smile and wonder whether she might be exaggerating.


----------



## MrSki (Dec 24, 2021)

Epona said:


> I like to think that in the future this will be incomprehensible to future generations until granny reminds everyone about the whole COVID thing that happened in the early '20s and regales everyone with stories about doing lateral flow tests, lockdowns, and face masks.  Everyone will nod and smile and wonder whether she might be exaggerating.


Happy Christmas Epona I hope you have a lovely one. Xx


----------



## Epona (Dec 24, 2021)

MrSki said:


> Happy Christmas Epona I hope you have a lovely one. Xx



You too, love and seasonal greetings to you xx


----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 24, 2021)

Epona said:


> I like to think that in the future this will be incomprehensible to future generations until granny reminds everyone about the whole COVID thing that happened in the early '20s and regales everyone with stories about doing lateral flow tests, lockdowns, and face masks.  Everyone will nod and smile and wonder whether she might be exaggerating.


It’ll be like when one of your grandparents would dig out their old gas mask from the hall cupboard to ramble on about the war.

I might keep a bit of random ephemera for this purpose, I have form for this as I found a government leaflet on the millennium bug in one of my archive boxes the other day.


----------



## Epona (Dec 24, 2021)

Dogsauce said:


> It’ll be like when one of your grandparents would dig out their old gas mask from the hall cupboard to ramble on about the war.
> 
> I might keep a bit of random ephemera for this purpose, I have form for this as I found a government leaflet on the millennium bug in one of my archive boxes the other day.



Oh I kept the letter that came round when we went into lockdown the first time - I mean I think we all got one, but it is the sort of thing that that MoL or other museums that record social history will want to display in the future, and we might keep for future generations to show to school children learning about this era of history.


----------



## two sheds (Dec 24, 2021)

I'm sure I've still got the pamphlet where they told people to hide under a table in the event of nuclear attack.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 24, 2021)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Dec 24, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Dec 24, 2021)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 25, 2021)




----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 25, 2021)




----------



## BristolEcho (Dec 25, 2021)

Puddy_Tat said:


>



Laughed to much at this really.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 27, 2021)




----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 28, 2021)

Posted as a public service rather than for the non-existent lols.


----------



## Epona (Dec 28, 2021)

I read that as 6g sucrose and thought "no wonder I've put on weight!"  (Nothing to do with being a lazy-arse git and not going for much state-sanctioned exercise  )


----------



## kabbes (Dec 28, 2021)

Whilst that might be factual, I feel it is leaving a lot on the table by justifying the safety of being injected with mRNA as “you already have RNA”. I already have E.coli too but I wouldn’t want to be injected with it.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 28, 2021)

Epona said:


> I read that as 6g sucrose and thought "no wonder I've put on weight!"  (Nothing to do with being a lazy-arse git and not going for much state-sanctioned exercise  )


That's why the vaccine gives you a sore arm - they're basically injecting a sugar cube.


----------



## DaveCinzano (Dec 28, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> That's why the vaccine gives you a sore arm - they're basically injecting a sugar cube.


They should switch to golden syrup 👍


----------



## dessiato (Dec 28, 2021)

DaveCinzano said:


> They should switch to golden syrup 👍


Or honey, which has the advantage of having some antibiotic properties.


----------



## two sheds (Dec 28, 2021)

Sugar cube taken by mouth like the polio vaccine of my youth  favourite ever vaccine I still remember being given it in our front room 60ish years later.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Dec 28, 2021)

two sheds said:


> Sugar cube taken by mouth like the polio vaccine of my youth  favourite ever vaccine I still remember being given it in our front room 60ish years later.


I remember the sugar cube too - do they still give kids the polio vaccine these days?


----------



## danny la rouge (Dec 28, 2021)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I remember the sugar cube too - do they still give kids the polio vaccine these days?


I remember the sugar cube too. My kids didn’t have that, but I can’t remember if it was administered a different way for them.


----------



## LDC (Dec 28, 2021)

danny la rouge said:


> I remember the sugar cube too. My kids didn’t have that, but I can’t remember if it was administered a different way for them.











						6-in-1-vaccine-overview
					

Find out about the 6-in-1 vaccine, which protects your baby against diphtheria,  hepatitis B, Hib (Haemophilus influenzae b), polio, tetanus and whooping cough.




					www.nhs.uk
				




Includes Polio vaccine.


----------



## Yossarian (Dec 29, 2021)




----------



## Dogsauce (Dec 30, 2021)




----------



## Yossarian (Dec 30, 2021)

"While Yankee Candle have been tiptoeing around the subject, since this observation went viral people have been responding to customers quite bluntly. "You've got the rona, Karen" one read."









						People Are Once Again Leaving Bad Reviews Of Yankee Candles, Unaware They Might Have COVID
					

People Are Once Again Leaving Bad Reviews Of Yankee Candles, Unaware They Might Have COVID




					www.iflscience.com


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Dec 30, 2021)

I have a real life anti vaxer conspiracy type on my Facebook friends list. Ive done some work for over the years and although he's awful I find him quite amusing. 

Whenever I try and debate with him though he runs away.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Dec 31, 2021)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> I have a real life anti vaxer conspiracy type on my Facebook friends list. Ive done some work for over the years and although he's awful I find him quite amusing.
> 
> Whenever I try and debate with him though he runs away.


Sounds about right.


----------



## keybored (Dec 31, 2021)

Anyone have the "Going back to the movies/cinema for the first time after lockdown (difference between US and UK audiences)" Twitter meme please? Asking for a friend.


----------



## Yossarian (Dec 31, 2021)

keybored said:


> Anyone have the "Going back to the movies/cinema for the first time after lockdown (difference between US and UK audiences)" Twitter meme please? Asking for a friend.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Dec 31, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 303879



_wipes a tear_ god bless this England


----------



## BigMoaner (Dec 31, 2021)

Yossarian said:


> View attachment 303879


Welling up here.


----------



## Badgers (Jan 1, 2022)

Your regular reminder that the universe has existed for 13.8 billion years. Test & Trace has been given £37billion

That's £2.68 for EVERY YEAR the universe has existed


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 1, 2022)




----------



## existentialist (Jan 1, 2022)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 304102


----------



## Puddy_Tat (Jan 1, 2022)

existentialist said:


>



I read it as taking the piss out of people who are arguing that infection numbers are only going up because there is more testing happening (didn't that twat trump make a similar argument at one point?)


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 1, 2022)

Puddy_Tat said:


> I read it as taking the piss out of people who are arguing that infection numbers are only going up because there is more testing happening (didn't that twat trump make a similar argument at one point?)



Nail on head.


----------



## spring-peeper (Jan 1, 2022)

Puddy_Tat said:


> I read it as taking the piss out of people who are arguing that infection numbers are only going up because there is more testing happening (didn't that twat trump make a similar argument at one point?)




Ontario, Canada is doing away with testing.  
From now on, only people from a very small subset will be tested.

Schools are no longer be allowed to report any covid cases.


----------



## petee (Jan 1, 2022)

spring-peeper said:


> Ontario, Canada is doing away with testing.
> From now on, only people from a very small subset will be tested.
> 
> Schools are no longer be allowed to report any covid cases.



you mooseheads are starting to disappoint us down here.


----------



## existentialist (Jan 1, 2022)

Puddy_Tat said:


> I read it as taking the piss out of people who are arguing that infection numbers are only going up because there is more testing happening (didn't that twat trump make a similar argument at one point?)


Sometimes it gets tricky to finesse that metaphorical fag paper into the tiny gap between satire and genuine idiocy


----------



## spring-peeper (Jan 1, 2022)

petee said:


> you mooseheads are starting to disappoint us down here.




That is just Ontario - Quebec is way more strict.  They are going back to curfews.

Ontario's Ford's kid is a rabid anti-vaxx.  She is bitching because her policeman hubby got fired for no vaccine. 


eta: Daycare workers looking after the under 5 y/o's are NOT eligible for tests.  Granddaughter is in that system, she is only two.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 2, 2022)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 2, 2022)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 3, 2022)




----------



## Clair De Lune (Jan 4, 2022)




----------



## rubbershoes (Jan 4, 2022)




----------



## rubbershoes (Jan 4, 2022)

Of course you can dive without a mask but it's not  advisable


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Jan 4, 2022)




----------



## Yossarian (Jan 4, 2022)




----------



## teqniq (Jan 4, 2022)




----------



## petee (Jan 4, 2022)

teqniq said:


>




"some believe"
well that validates the whole idea then.


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 4, 2022)

teqniq said:


>



I've always wanted to be a zombie
eternal thought free life
what else would one want?


----------



## dessiato (Jan 4, 2022)

wemakeyousoundb said:


> I've always wanted to be a zombie
> eternal thought free life
> what else would one want?


Brains


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 5, 2022)




----------



## danski (Jan 5, 2022)

Orang Utan said:


> View attachment 304578


Yeah, the Illuminati love a real ale and cheap burger.


----------



## Badgers (Jan 5, 2022)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 5, 2022)




----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 5, 2022)

> “I am not about pissing off the French people,” the president said in an interview with readers of Le Parisien daily on Tuesday. “But as for the non-vaccinated, I really want to piss them off. And we will continue to do this, to the end. This is the strategy.”





> Macron said, and it was “only a very small minority who are resisting. How do we reduce that minority? We reduce it – sorry for the expression – by pissing them off even more.”



Satire or true, The Onion or The Guardian?



Spoiler: Answer



It's fucking true. 









						Macron declares his Covid strategy is to ‘piss off’ the unvaccinated
					

French president stokes divisions as parliament debates tighter requirements for mandatory health pass




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## Yossarian (Jan 5, 2022)

cupid_stunt said:


> Satire or true, The Onion or The Guardian?
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Apparently the literal translation is "I want to cover the unvaccinated in shit."

_It was Macron’s use of the French verb emmerder that provoked anger among French opposition politicians and a certain amount of surprise among political commentators in France. The verb can be translated on the softer side as “to bug” or “to annoy” but is more commonly translated in English to the informal “to piss off”. Literally the word in French means “to cover in shit” (merde) and is considered vulgar._



			https://www.thelocal.fr/20220104/macron-causes-stir-as-he-vows-to-pss-off-frances-unvaccinated/


----------



## existentialist (Jan 5, 2022)

Yossarian said:


> Apparently the literal translation is "I want to cover the unvaccinated in shit."
> 
> _It was Macron’s use of the French verb emmerder that provoked anger among French opposition politicians and a certain amount of surprise among political commentators in France. The verb can be translated on the softer side as “to bug” or “to annoy” but is more commonly translated in English to the informal “to piss off”. Literally the word in French means “to cover in shit” (merde) and is considered vulgar._
> 
> ...


It's rather a stark contrast to our politicians, isn't it?


----------



## gentlegreen (Jan 5, 2022)

I suspect he was aiming to defuse the "yellow  vesters" - especially after saying :-
«Un irresponsable n’est plus un citoyen»

_«Je ne suis pas pour emmerder les Français. *Je peste toute la journée contre l’administration quand elle les bloque*. Eh bien, là, les non-vaccinés, j’ai très envie de les emmerder. Et donc, on va continuer de le faire, jusqu’au bout.»

*"I rant all day at the administration when it blocks them.*_


----------



## existentialist (Jan 5, 2022)

gentlegreen said:


> I suspect he was aiming to defuse the "yellow  vesters" - especially after saying :-
> «Un irresponsable n’est plus un citoyen»
> 
> _«Je ne suis pas pour emmerder les Français. *Je peste toute la journée contre l’administration quand elle les bloque*. Eh bien, là, les non-vaccinés, j’ai très envie de les emmerder. Et donc, on va continuer de le faire, jusqu’au bout.»
> ...


Can't he be our Prime Minister?


----------



## gentlegreen (Jan 5, 2022)

As I said on the other thread, I wonder how Priti Patel would think about this - would she use it against Corbyn's defective brother ?


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 5, 2022)

He's upset parliament. 



> The *French parliament* suspended debate on a new Covid law early on Wednesday as opposition lawmakers demanded explanations from *President Emmanuel Macron* about comments in which he said he wanted to “piss off” unvaccinated people.
> 
> Macron made the remark in an interview with Le Parisien newspaper published late on Tuesday. He also said unvaccinated people were “irresponsible” and that he planned to make their lives so complicated that they would end up having a vaccine.
> 
> ...


----------



## gentlegreen (Jan 5, 2022)

I was just reminded that France has just taken over presidency of the EU council - so maybe it's a nudge in that direction too ...


----------



## existentialist (Jan 5, 2022)

cupid_stunt said:


> He's upset parliament.


I think he's only offended certain (right wing) bits of the French Parliament, TBF.

From what I gather, the French are at a bit of a "let's just get it over with" stage with the pandemic (sound familiar?), the difference being that there's quite a lot of support for measures to control it, rather than pretending it isn't happening. They have a thing called the "carte de sante", which is their, ahem, passport to healthcare, so bolting on vaccination conditionality isn't such a big deal for most of them, unless you're a vaccine refuser.


----------



## IC3D (Jan 5, 2022)

The French govt measures are deeply resented tbf


----------



## existentialist (Jan 5, 2022)

IC3D said:


> The French govt measures are deeply resented tbf


I am sure they are. Particularly people prone to the anti-vaxx "freedumb" mentality. I suspect that, for most people, it will be at worst a question of principle, and most people who are moderately pragmatic will accept it as a way of managing the pandemic.

But I'm not massively surprised to hear you focusing on the resentment angle, TBF.


----------



## LDC (Jan 5, 2022)

I've just had a visit from a couple of friends who live in France (one from Belgium, one from UK originally) and does seem to be true that there's lots of discontent about the vaccine passes, and also plenty of people on the left very vaccine skeptical (if not outright anti-vax) and not very observant of any public health measures.


----------



## existentialist (Jan 5, 2022)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> I've just had a visit from a couple of friends who live in France (one from Belgium, one from UK originally) and does seem to be true that there's lots of discontent about the vaccine passes, and also plenty of people on the left very vaccine skeptical (if not outright anti-vax) and not very observant of any public health measures.


France has always had a fairly major vaccine scepticism problem (probably not entirely unrelated to the fact that things like homeopathy, etc. are available under the national health insurance scheme ), but that does seem to have shifted quite significantly during the course of the pandemic.


----------



## LDC (Jan 5, 2022)

existentialist said:


> France has always had a fairly major vaccine scepticism problem (probably not entirely unrelated to the fact that things like homeopathy, etc. are available under the national health insurance scheme ), but that does seem to have shifted quite significantly during the course of the pandemic.



Yeah, we tried to chat about the difference in that between the scene/their peers and wider society but it didn't get very far!


----------



## pbsmooth (Jan 5, 2022)

The French are generally quite anti vaccine but from my French family and friends they say the general mood is in favor of what he's saying here. Thankfully.


----------



## CosmikRoger (Jan 5, 2022)

Ive lived here 20 years and can tell you all that the only people pissed off with what Macron said are anti vaccin fuckwits and right wing fuckwits
Quel dommage


----------



## gentlegreen (Jan 5, 2022)

I hadn't noticed quite how far down the rabbithole Mélenchon had gone ...

How do you think this will play in the Présidentielles  ?


----------



## CosmikRoger (Jan 5, 2022)

Im no expert, but Mélenchon is a bit of a busted flush, the French Geordes Galloway if you know what I mean

*Georges



**George


----------



## existentialist (Jan 5, 2022)

gentlegreen said:


> I hadn't noticed quite how far down the rabbithole Mélenchon had gone ...
> 
> How do you think this will play in the Présidentielles  ?


I think it'll be the usual thing - one or two loonies will give everyone a bit of a scare in the first round, then the (more) sensible candidate will prevail in the runoffs...


----------



## High Voltage (Jan 5, 2022)

Given that he's, probably, not allowed to have them shot and they're not dying off fast enough through Covid, this seems a perfectly reasonable "middle of the road" solution


----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jan 5, 2022)

My local Anti vac, super conspiraloon had now gone religious


----------



## Hassan I Sabha (Jan 5, 2022)




----------



## two sheds (Jan 5, 2022)

That's us fucked then


----------



## elbows (Jan 5, 2022)

Wont somebody think of the arse souls?


----------



## editor (Jan 5, 2022)

Brilliant!


----------



## elbows (Jan 5, 2022)

That cheered me up, cheers!


----------



## Mation (Jan 5, 2022)

editor said:


> Brilliant!



We NEED test centres with all sorts of DJs, and resulting stats by genre


----------



## wemakeyousoundb (Jan 5, 2022)

editor said:


> Brilliant!



For some reason a lot of embedded tiktok don't show for me, just a long blank scroll.
Bring back longcat!


----------



## two sheds (Jan 5, 2022)

you on firefox and/or using duckduckgo privacy setting?


----------



## Mation (Jan 5, 2022)

However, if no one turned up to a psytrance covid test centre, how would we tell whether it was because people who like psytrance are idiots who won't get tested, or just that no one at all would want to go there?


----------



## elbows (Jan 5, 2022)




----------



## teqniq (Jan 5, 2022)

elbows said:


>



Found that Tweet yesterday, some of the replies are hilarious.


----------



## T & P (Jan 6, 2022)




----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 6, 2022)

T & P said:


> View attachment 304793


Don't get that.


----------



## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 6, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Don't get that.



Did you Google?


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 6, 2022)

UnderAnOpenSky said:


> Did you Google?


No.  I don't use google.


----------



## prunus (Jan 6, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> No.  I don't use google.


Probably for the best in this instance.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 6, 2022)

prunus said:


> Probably for the best in this instance.


I suspected it was some filth.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 6, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I suspected it was some filth.



You could say that.









						2 Girls 1 Cup - Wikipedia
					






					en.wikipedia.org
				




Best not to read whilst eating.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Jan 6, 2022)

cupid_stunt said:


> You could say that.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I'm not going to read abut some tawdry fith.  I have standards. .


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 6, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I'm not going to read abut some tawdry fith.  I have standards. .



No you don't, as demonstrated by your seagull porn posts.


----------



## fishfinger (Jan 6, 2022)

cupid_stunt said:


> No you don't, as demonstrated by your seagull porn posts.


2 gulls 1 chip.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 7, 2022)

cupid_stunt said:


> You could say that.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



On the viral reaction memes: 
“singer Wyclef Jean sat through the whole thing without looking away or showing any apparent reaction, all while eating corn on the cob


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 7, 2022)

Orang Utan said:


> On the viral reaction memes:
> “singer Wyclef Jean sat through the whole thing without looking away or showing any apparent reaction, all while eating corn on the cob



And, it goes on...



> Ace Frehley, formerly of Kiss, was shown the video on The Opie and Anthony Show in July 2009, and was unfazed, declaring, "Crazier things than that have happened on the road." "Genuine Nerd" Toby Radloff was so disgusted by the clip that he had to immediately watch it again.


----------



## editor (Jan 7, 2022)




----------



## editor (Jan 7, 2022)




----------



## DaveCinzano (Jan 7, 2022)

editor said:


> View attachment 304889


Vaxsceptic Asshole


----------



## Yossarian (Jan 7, 2022)

editor said:


> View attachment 304890



"Unfortunately, that only protects against getting infected by Jesus," a doctor explained as she was intubated.


----------



## elbows (Jan 7, 2022)

Maybe the Holy Trinity would have been upgraded to the Holy Tetralogy if they had been aware of viruses back then. The father, the son, the holy ghost and the vengeful virus of doom that will speed you to your maker. God had a foul temper in the old testament.


----------



## pbsmooth (Jan 7, 2022)

blood of christ tends to refer to the blood shed when he died, somewhat ironically.


----------



## petee (Jan 7, 2022)

elbows said:


> Maybe the Holy Trinity would have been upgraded to the Holy Tetralogy if they had been aware of viruses back then.



the only site that ever banned me was a rightwing catholic site that banned me because i parroted a rightwing talking point of the time that George Bush Jr was on a par with the trinity.


----------



## brogdale (Jan 7, 2022)

I know it's not the Rona..but...


----------



## LDC (Jan 7, 2022)

brogdale said:


> I know it's not the Rona..but...
> 
> View attachment 304916



I laughed, then I read the article and felt sad for Mr. Gosling.


----------



## brogdale (Jan 7, 2022)

LynnDoyleCooper said:


> I laughed, then I read the article and felt sad for Mr. Gosling.


Yes, losing his 'friends' like that.


----------



## A380 (Jan 8, 2022)




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## Dogsauce (Jan 8, 2022)

Not sure he understands what ‘decimated’ means, does he? If you can’t do maths that basic probably not a good idea to pay attention to any other thing they’re on about. If they even said it in the first place, which is doubtful.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 8, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> Not sure he understands what ‘decimated’ means, does he? If you can’t do maths that basic probably not a good idea to pay attention to any other thing they’re on about. If they even said it in the first place, which is doubtful.


Decimated now means greatly reduced, despite its etymology


----------



## Fez909 (Jan 8, 2022)

Orang Utan said:


> Decimated now means greatly reduced, despite its etymology


This is true. The most up too date word is "Schwabbed" anyway.


----------



## elbows (Jan 8, 2022)

As in 'we anal schwabbed the pangolins but didnt turn up any clues'?


----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2022)




----------



## Yossarian (Jan 8, 2022)

A380 said:


> View attachment 304994



"And he'd have gotten away with it too, if he hadn't written this evil plan out step-by-step and had it published in a book for some reason."


----------



## Artaxerxes (Jan 8, 2022)

editor said:


> View attachment 304890



Wankered on communion wine


----------



## PR1Berske (Jan 8, 2022)




----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 8, 2022)

editor said:


> Brilliant!


----------



## BigMoaner (Jan 8, 2022)

A380 said:


> View attachment 304994


thick cunts.









						World Economic Forum founder did not write book about ‘organised epidemics’ - Full Fact
					

An essay passage that claims humanity will be wiped out by ‘organised epidemics‘ has been wrongly attributed to World Economic Forum founder Klaus Schwab




					fullfact.org


----------



## Storm Fox (Jan 8, 2022)

BigMoaner said:


> thick cunts.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Again within its own construct it's bullshit. 
If NWO are so powerful, he would never have been allowed to publish the book. He would have 'caught' COVID and died. I mean apparently The NWO have no qualms about killing millions.


----------



## weepiper (Jan 8, 2022)

editor said:


> View attachment 304890


The spray bottle of Zoflora we use to disinfect bikes coming into my shop is universally referred to among us as 'Jesus's blood'.


----------



## Yossarian (Jan 8, 2022)

Storm Fox said:


> Again within its own construct it's bullshit.
> If NWO are so powerful, he would never have been allowed to publish the book. He would have 'caught' COVID and died. I mean apparently The NWO have no qualms about killing millions.



Yep, it's lazy conspiraloonery once again - fuck's sakes, at least claim that it's a secret message revealed in the last letter of every paragraph of the Dutch translation or something.


----------



## cupid_stunt (Jan 8, 2022)




----------



## A380 (Jan 8, 2022)




----------



## HAL9000 (Jan 8, 2022)

MrSki said:


>


 
According to sky news, the doctor on the left doesn't want to have the jab because he got covid in the past.   I don't understand why he doesn't want one, in terms in of risk..

one micromort is a 1 in million chance of death or put it another way, travelling 250 miles in a car​








						Understanding uncertainty: Small but lethal
					

Comparing and communicating small lethal risks is a tricky business, yet this is what many of us are faced with in our daily lives. One way of measuring these risks is to use a quantity called the micromort. David Spiegelhalter and Mike Pearson investigate.




					plus.maths.org
				




( the above article was written in 2010, car safety has improved, so the distance might be greater before you have a 1 in million chance)

Looking at the blood cloting issue with AZ



> All suspected cases following vaccination with any of the COVID-19 vaccines being used in the UK are undergoing a detailed review by the MHRA. Up to 4 August 2021, the MHRA received 412 reports of thrombosis events with low platelets of which 147 were CVST following vaccination with the AZ vaccine. This is out of a total of 24.8 million first doses and 23.9 million second doses of AZ vaccine given by that date in the UK. For the latest information please see the weekly summary from the MHRA.








						Information for healthcare professionals on blood clotting following COVID-19 vaccination
					






					www.gov.uk
				




So that's about 6 clotting events for every million AZ vaccines given.   Blood clot does NOT equal to death, but it may need treatment.   Now people have been asked to seek medical help for this particular problem after receiving an AZ vaccine.   My guess is that we're looking at micro mort level of risk.


----------



## elbows (Jan 8, 2022)

HAL9000 said:


> So that's about 6 clotting events for every million AZ vaccines given.   Blood clot does NOT equal to death, but it may need treatment.   Now people have been asked to seek medical help for this particular problem after receiving an AZ vaccine.   My guess is that we're looking at micro mort level of risk.


The UK authorities had some understanding that detailed risk calculations were no match for the publicity and public awareness surrounding this issue, including a handful of examples of death from this cause that featured in the UK news at the time, and the pauses various countries did when the issue first emerged. They did not want this stuff to hamper the vaccine uptake levels. So despite initially formally handling it by using risk calculations to set an age limit, below which they recommended different vaccines be offered, they effectively ended up going much further. Since plenty of supply of other vaccines were available by then, they effectively sidelined the use of AZ vaccine, that vaccine faded from view in the UK and hasnt played much of a part in subsequent phases of the vaccination programme, with some minor exceptions here and there.


----------



## LDC (Jan 8, 2022)

HAL9000 said:


> According to sky news, the doctor on the left doesn't want to have the jab because he got covid in the past.   I don't understand why he doesn't want one, in terms in of risk..
> 
> one micromort is a 1 in million chance of death or put it another way, travelling 250 miles in a car​
> 
> ...



For some in the NHS it's not at all about risk/health stuff, but about it being a last straw after feeling like the government hasn't looked after the NHS and the workforce for decades.


----------



## spring-peeper (Jan 8, 2022)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 8, 2022)




----------



## hitmouse (Jan 9, 2022)




----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 9, 2022)

fuck off with that, cupid_stunt have a think before you post


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 9, 2022)

hitmouse said:


>


Why didn’t we think of that before! It’s so obvious.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 9, 2022)

Orang Utan said:


> fuck off with that, cupid_stunt have a think before you post


Exactly. Everyone knows fortune cookies are originally from Japan.


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 9, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Exactly. Everyone knows fortune cookies are originally from Japan.


No, he did a racism


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## danny la rouge (Jan 9, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Exactly. Everyone knows fortune cookies are originally from Japan.


Read the fortunes. They’re straight from a 1960s stereotype.


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## dessiato (Jan 9, 2022)

Orang Utan said:


> No, he did a racism





danny la rouge said:


> Read the fortunes. They’re straight from a 1960s stereotype.


I know


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## UnderAnOpenSky (Jan 9, 2022)

cupid_stunt said:


> View attachment 305170



Funny. I saw that on Facebook yesterday and wondered if anyone would be daft enough to post it on Urban.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 9, 2022)

It’s still up there, cupid_stunt - get rid!


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## rubbershoes (Jan 9, 2022)

A380 said:


> View attachment 304994



Battle of the deluded


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Jan 9, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> Battle of the deluded
> 
> View attachment 305209


Kinda reminds me of this, but it has managed to be much worse.


----------



## spring-peeper (Jan 9, 2022)

from my s-i-l facebook page



Asked him if the book was the bible, and he had no idea what book I was talking about.


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## Puddy_Tat (Jan 9, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> Battle of the deluded
> 
> View attachment 305209



that sounds kinda fishy...


----------



## Orang Utan (Jan 10, 2022)

Orang Utan said:


> It’s still up there, cupid_stunt - get rid!


Still waiting you stupid cunt


----------



## The39thStep (Jan 11, 2022)

Dunno if this has been posted but it’s great


----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 11, 2022)

The39thStep said:


> Dunno if this has been posted but it’s great



Spot on!


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## souljacker (Jan 11, 2022)

The39thStep said:


> Dunno if this has been posted but it’s great



Personally, I think Paulie Walnuts would be antivaxx, spouting some shit about not letting anyone try and prick him. But agree that he wouldn't have left the house since March 2020 and wouldn't have touched another human being since then either. He would also have gone through millions of litres of hand sanitiser.


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## gentlegreen (Jan 11, 2022)

Youtube's algorithm ...


----------



## MrSki (Jan 12, 2022)




----------



## editor (Jan 12, 2022)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 12, 2022)




----------



## RubyToogood (Jan 12, 2022)

MrSki said:


>


This definitely fills a need. I've twice had to go for mine in short sleeves when it was far too cold for them.


----------



## hitmouse (Jan 14, 2022)

Have we had this cartoon from 1918 yet?


----------



## Raheem (Jan 14, 2022)

hitmouse said:


> Have we had this cartoon from 1918 yet?


Unclear if the fat guy is sitting next to a shop counter or having a shit behind a mini-skip.


----------



## dessiato (Jan 14, 2022)

Raheem said:


> Unclear if the fat guy is sitting next to a shop counter or having a shit behind a mini-skip.


Must be having a shit behind a counter. I don't think they had mini skips then.


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## two sheds (Jan 14, 2022)

You'd never get a cartoon like that now  political correctness gone mad


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## Yossarian (Jan 14, 2022)

hitmouse said:


> Have we had this cartoon from 1918 yet?



Never seen Everett True before but he's clearly needed now more than ever. 



He also didn't have any time for racists:


----------



## petee (Jan 14, 2022)

hitmouse said:


> Have we had this cartoon from 1918 yet?



The Outbursts of Everett True - love it








						Comic Supplement
					

Barnacle Press: Comics 1.0




					www.barnaclepress.com


----------



## hitmouse (Jan 14, 2022)

two sheds said:


> You'd never get a cartoon like that now  political correctness gone mad


It's true, I can't think of the last time I saw a modern cartoon about someone having a shit behind a mini-skip.


Yossarian said:


> Never seen Everett True before but he's clearly needed now more than ever.


He didn't fuck around:


----------



## editor (Jan 15, 2022)




----------



## MrSki (Jan 16, 2022)




----------



## PR1Berske (Jan 16, 2022)

> Anti-vaxxers have targeted scores of schools and recently stormed a Covid testing site. They were led by Britain’s most visible activist, Piers Corbyn, who subsequently urged people to burn down the offices of MPs who backed new restrictions.
> 
> Health experts warn that their false claims have had an impact on the vaccination programme, with Chris Whitty, England’s chief medical officer, blaming “misinformation” for vaccine hesitancy.
> 
> ...












						Concern for UK security as anti-vaxxer groups evolve towards US-style militias
					

Counter-terrorism officials are monitoring movement amid military-style training and lurch towards violent extremism




					www.theguardian.com


----------



## T & P (Jan 17, 2022)




----------



## hitmouse (Jan 19, 2022)




----------



## Yossarian (Jan 21, 2022)

_Everyone’s still so scared of COVID. But come on, people. It’s going to be endemic soon enough. And that has to mean, uh, something.

Endemic means freedom, more or less. Sometimes more, but occasionally less. They say less is more, and that’ll be the case here. Except when more’s less

Endemic means no more shots. Okay, well, not no more. But like on a regular schedule, when your doctor tells you. It won’t be every few months; it’ll be, at most, three or four times a year (five in a leap year)._









						COVID Will Eventually Be Endemic, and I Absolutely Know What That Word Means
					

Everyone’s still so scared of COVID. But come on, people. It’s going to be endemic soon enough. And that has to mean, uh, something. Endemic means ...




					www.mcsweeneys.net


----------



## InfoBurner (Jan 22, 2022)

.


----------



## AmateurAgitator (Jan 23, 2022)




----------



## Superdupastupor (Jan 23, 2022)

.


----------



## Superdupastupor (Jan 23, 2022)

.


----------



## Superdupastupor (Jan 23, 2022)

.


----------



## krink (Jan 23, 2022)

Typical


----------



## Dogsauce (Jan 24, 2022)




----------



## rubbershoes (Jan 24, 2022)

Balsonaro?


----------



## Dogsauce (Jan 25, 2022)




----------



## danny la rouge (Jan 25, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> Balsonaro?
> 
> View attachment 307236


“Jesus is a cool guy (something about a donkey)”.


----------



## gentlegreen (Jan 27, 2022)




----------



## gentlegreen (Jan 27, 2022)

danny la rouge said:


> “Jesus is a cool guy (something about a donkey)”.


apparently :-

"Jesus is such a cool guy that he ended up adopting the donkey from the crib"

(OCR - google)


----------



## A380 (Jan 31, 2022)




----------



## Badgers (Feb 12, 2022)




----------



## BigMoaner (Feb 12, 2022)

Dogsauce said:


> View attachment 307195


Oh fuck the logic is water tight too. Beautiful


----------



## teqniq (Feb 14, 2022)




----------



## gosub (Feb 21, 2022)




----------



## Yossarian (Mar 8, 2022)

Managers of Toronto office building: "More workers are coming back, how should we welcome them? I know, let's taunt them! Say their pets missing them or something."


----------



## HAL9000 (Mar 27, 2022)

Gruinard Island: Fire on island used for Anthrax experiments
					

People who saw the fire on Gruinard Island from the mainland described the sight as "apocalyptic".



					www.bbc.co.uk


----------



## Yossarian (Apr 8, 2022)




----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 8, 2022)

HAL9000 said:


> Gruinard Island: Fire on island used for Anthrax experiments
> 
> 
> People who saw the fire on Gruinard Island from the mainland described the sight as "apocalyptic".
> ...



How does a fire start on an uninhabited island?


----------



## dessiato (Apr 8, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> How does a fire start on an uninhabited island?


Lightning strike?


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 8, 2022)

dessiato said:


> Lightning strike?



Could be. I'm surprised the story didn't mention that. But it was a poorly written story so maybe I'm not surprised.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 8, 2022)

rubbershoes said:


> How does a fire start on an uninhabited island?


Anthrax spores rubbing together in the wind, creating a spark.  Probably.


----------



## rubbershoes (Apr 8, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Anthrax spores rubbing together in the wind, creating a spark.  Probably.



So not the Joos then?

Or 5g?


----------



## High Voltage (Apr 8, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Anthrax spores rubbing together in the wind, creating a spark.  Probably.


Prob'ly magnetised by the 5g WiFi waves


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Apr 8, 2022)

High Voltage said:


> Prob'ly magnetised by the 5g WiFi waves


The island probably sits at a convergence of ley lines too - it was a disaster waiting to happen.


----------



## High Voltage (Apr 8, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> . . .  it was a disaster waiting to happen.


Will no-one think of the children


----------



## PR1Berske (Apr 14, 2022)




----------



## Yossarian (Apr 20, 2022)




----------



## T & P (Jun 8, 2022)




----------



## petee (Aug 20, 2022)




----------



## existentialist (Aug 20, 2022)

petee said:


>


Tr:

 "You're shagging an antivaxxer?"
"Fuck you"


----------



## petee (Aug 20, 2022)

existentialist said:


> Tr:
> 
> "You're shagging an antivaxxer?"
> "Fuck you"



i got "you're sleeping with an antivaxxer? I shit on you."

harsh, but fair.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Aug 23, 2022)




----------



## emanymton (Aug 23, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


>


I'd say 90% this is a completely made up story and 10% chance the undertaker had a good laugh later.


----------



## pbsmooth (Aug 23, 2022)

and then all the blood clots started clapping


----------



## two sheds (Aug 28, 2022)




----------



## petee (Sep 3, 2022)




----------



## A380 (Sep 3, 2022)

petee said:


>




Taps watch.


----------



## farmerbarleymow (Sep 14, 2022)

This has probably been posted before, but whatever


----------



## existentialist (Sep 15, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> This has probably been posted before, but whatever


I remember this claim going around the houses very soon after (or quite possibly before ) the rollout of the vaccine. "Pints of blood"


----------



## dessiato (Sep 15, 2022)

farmerbarleymow said:


> This has probably been posted before, but whatever


True story.

After her second injection my mother turned yellow. She was taken to hospital for a scan. She was asked to return the next day for further tests. She was given days to live.

She died four weeks later.

(OK it was cancer, and nothing to do with the vaccine, but still...  That wouldn't fit an anti-vax narrative)


----------

