# Masterchef 2012



## trashpony (Jan 17, 2012)

Starts in 4 minutes. I'm excited


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## Santino (Jan 17, 2012)




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## Espresso (Jan 17, 2012)

Bloodyhellfire that photo frightened me.
I love Masterchef.


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## trashpony (Jan 17, 2012)

Santino said:


>



*dislike*


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## la ressistance (Jan 17, 2012)

i'm watching, but i know it's gonna be shit. at least until the semis.


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## DJ Squelch (Jan 17, 2012)

When were the auditions they keep talking about on?
Have I been missing Masterchef episodes?


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## trashpony (Jan 17, 2012)

DJ Squelch said:


> When were the auditions they keep talking about on?
> Have I been missing Masterchef episodes?


No, everyone that entered had to submit a dish anonymously and they chose 24 from them.

Foam is clearly the new black for this year


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## Espresso (Jan 17, 2012)

DJ Squelch said:


> When were the auditions they keep talking about on?
> Have I been missing Masterchef episodes?



They weren't on telly, as far as I can tell.
Last year's ones were shown and everyone whinged and whined about the X-Factorization of Masterchef.


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## DJ Squelch (Jan 17, 2012)

Espresso said:


> They weren't on telly, as far as I can tell.
> Last year's ones were shown and everyone whinged and whined about the X-Factorization of Masterchef.



True , they were a bit shit but then we did get moments like the imfamous deconstructed trifle.


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## Espresso (Jan 17, 2012)

DJ Squelch said:


> True , they were a bit shit but then we did get moments like the imfamous deconstructed trifle.



Hah! That was quality telly. I'd forgotten about that.


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## Divisive Cotton (Jan 17, 2012)

ffs the first minute of me watching has some buffoon blubbing because he was criticised for being "a bit too basic"


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## purenarcotic (Jan 17, 2012)

I am disappointed that Gregg did not say 'cooking doesn't get tougher than this' and also don't like that they serve them the food in a separate room.

Still looking forward to it though.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 17, 2012)

Divisive Cotton said:


> ffs the first minute of me watching has some buffoon blubbing because he was criticised for being "a bit too basic"



Me and the wife pissed ourselves, fucking hilarious.


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## 8ball (Jan 17, 2012)

I can't watch it - I just keep thinking of that bald one having sex with the food whenever the cameras are off.


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## Espresso (Jan 17, 2012)

He's got something to cry about now.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 17, 2012)

Glad to see they've gone back to the old format of invention test, professional kitchen and hopefully their own dish afterwards.


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## N_igma (Jan 17, 2012)

Lol that chef's a mad man!


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## Santino (Jan 17, 2012)

I'm never going to that cunt's restaurant then.


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## Espresso (Jan 17, 2012)

"Move those little legs"??
Holy shit.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 17, 2012)

He's a bit of a knobend isn't he. He's all bully no teaching.


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## trashpony (Jan 17, 2012)

What a wanker. I cannot believe that Japanese woman came on to John either


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## purenarcotic (Jan 17, 2012)

The Japanese woman is going to get on my nerves no end.


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## Santino (Jan 17, 2012)

If I went to a restaurant called Gilgamesh I would expect Middle Eastern food not Asian.


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## wayward bob (Jan 17, 2012)

wtf how tf did i miss this???!  got distracted by th nekkid thread obvs


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## la ressistance (Jan 17, 2012)

aki is gonna win the final. no point watching any more.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 17, 2012)

That is literally a turd on a plate.


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## belboid (Jan 17, 2012)

la ressistance said:


> aki is gonna win the final. no point watching any more.


i hope she dies before the end of the episode.


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## Johnny Canuck3 (Jan 17, 2012)

trashpony said:


> Starts in 4 minutes. I'm excited



I'm assuming this has nothing to do with Halo?


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## trashpony (Jan 17, 2012)

Johnny Canuck3 said:


> I'm assuming this has nothing to do with Halo?


I have no idea what you're talking about so no, probably not


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## 8ball (Jan 17, 2012)

Johnny Canuck3 said:


> I'm assuming this has nothing to do with Halo?



They're doing braised grunt.


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## Johnny Canuck3 (Jan 17, 2012)

8ball said:


> They're doing braised grunt.


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## hammerntongues (Jan 18, 2012)

purenarcotic said:


> The Japanese woman is going to get on my nerves no end.


 
I liked her , bet she is already smiling when she wakes up and goes on smiling until she goes to bed in her untidy bedroom , for a quantum physics nuclear physicist that is no mean feat , oh and her food looked good too.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 18, 2012)

hammerntongues said:


> I liked her , bet she is already smiling when she wakes up and goes on smiling until she goes to bed in her untidy bedroom , for a quantum physics nuclear physicist that is no mean feat , oh and her food looked good too.



Her food is very impressive, she just grates on me.  I wish she'd calm the fuck down.


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## belboid (Jan 18, 2012)

she lokoed like she was trying to out-kook Zooey Deschanel, and her last dish looked beautifully presented but otherwise fairly basic stuff.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

I'm in love with Aki


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

Such a shame they've fiddled with the format - the auditions with all the grim cockups are the most entertaining bits of the show. What an own goal.


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## trashpony (Jan 18, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> Such a shame they've fiddled with the format - the auditions with all the grim cockups are the most entertaining bits of the show. What an own goal.


Lots of people hated them last year but I agree that they were very funny. Possibly a bit cruel tho


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## wayward bob (Jan 18, 2012)

grrr i was falsely lured into thinking there were a whole load of masterchefs on the iplayer. didn't notice they all said "coming soon" 

i want the plasterer dude to win so far


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## wayward bob (Jan 18, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> I'm in love with Aki



she is annoying as fuck


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

I want to annoy her


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## 1927 (Jan 18, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> she is annoying as fuck



Yeah. I thought she was lovely and then asked myself how long I could stay in a room with her without wanting to throttle her!


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## la ressistance (Jan 18, 2012)

1927 said:


> Yeah. I thought she was lovely and then asked myself how long I could stay in a room with her without wanting to throttle her!


throttle....sexually?  about 1min.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

They're missing out the best bits!


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## wayward bob (Jan 18, 2012)

blimey she's well preserved for 50  i look older than her


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## wayward bob (Jan 18, 2012)

heh the sea trout's fooling them all


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## trashpony (Jan 18, 2012)

A deconstructed chicken and mushroom pie 

Rabbit and pigeon - ummm ...


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## Espresso (Jan 18, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> blimey she's well preserved for 50  i look older than her



I nearly fell over my chin when it said she was 50.
Glad it wasn't only me


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## purenarcotic (Jan 18, 2012)

Kiev of fail.


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## N_igma (Jan 18, 2012)

That supply teacher could get on my tits very easily.


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## ymu (Jan 18, 2012)

I think the plasterer will go far in this.



la ressistance said:


> throttle....sexually?  about 1min.


Fucking hell - we can't even have a Masterchef thread without this shit. What the hell is it that makes people think it's acceptable to make comments like this?


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## Espresso (Jan 18, 2012)

This mob aren't as impressive at this stage as last nights people.


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## trashpony (Jan 18, 2012)

Nah, they're bloody rubbish aren't they?


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

Not feeling it this year.
Not sure I'll bother with the rest.


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## wayward bob (Jan 18, 2012)

well they got an extra last night so maybe they're gonna lose one more today?

and i agree ymu that was a ffs comment.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 18, 2012)

I don't see any winners in this batch.  The Indian restaurant's food looks lush.


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## Santino (Jan 18, 2012)

That chef invokes his influence on European
cuisine.


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## Espresso (Jan 18, 2012)

God, I want to go to that restaurant.


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## mrs quoad (Jan 18, 2012)

Ooooooooo good thread!


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## wayward bob (Jan 18, 2012)

heh i wondered about "invokes" too


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## wayward bob (Jan 18, 2012)

i hope rabbit boy ups his game, i like him.


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## Espresso (Jan 18, 2012)

I see the wimminfolk have been doing their homeowrk. Gregg always wants to keep ladies who do puds.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)




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## trashpony (Jan 18, 2012)

Lexi's sponge looks like someone has puked on it


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## Espresso (Jan 18, 2012)

Maybe someone had seen that tattoo.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 18, 2012)

That is a yummy looking desert.


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## Espresso (Jan 18, 2012)

Afsaneh's one looked majestic. This one here from Emma looks terrible


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## trashpony (Jan 18, 2012)

The 50YO and Lexi to go through IMO


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## Santino (Jan 18, 2012)

In 2012 do we still need to talk about the 'exotic flavours' of the Middle East?


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## trashpony (Jan 18, 2012)

Santino said:


> In 2012 do we still need to talk about the 'exotic flavours' of the Middle East?


If you're not doing European, you're doing exotic or exciting.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

Aw they kicked the pretty one off. 
I'd be such a shit judge


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## purenarcotic (Jan 18, 2012)

I feel like John is saying more ridiculous things so he can get his own special synesthesia video. Not feeling it at all.


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## Paulie Tandoori (Jan 18, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> Aw they kicked the pretty one off.
> I'd be such a shit judge


flabby pastry


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## Espresso (Jan 18, 2012)

I'm surprised anyone apart from Afsaneh got through tonight. Four of them? Really?
Unless tomorrow's are really terrible, maybe.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

Well we have no right to criticise really.
We just saw the food.
We didn't eat it.


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## moomoo (Jan 18, 2012)

Oh, was it on tonight as well?


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## Orang Utan (Jan 18, 2012)

It's on every night


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## moomoo (Jan 18, 2012)

Oh!  I shall try to remember to watch it tomorrow then!


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## purenarcotic (Jan 18, 2012)

It's on every Tues, Wed and Thurs at 9.  I don't know if they are doing a 'highlights' show on Friday this year.


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## wayward bob (Jan 19, 2012)

potato fuckin risotto?


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## Espresso (Jan 19, 2012)

That pud looks pretty epic, Bethan.


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## wayward bob (Jan 19, 2012)

_stacks_ are this year's seared scallops


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## wayward bob (Jan 19, 2012)

Espresso said:


> That pud looks pretty epic, Bethan.



or not


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## Espresso (Jan 19, 2012)

Har har!


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## wayward bob (Jan 19, 2012)

is there a point to the restaurant bit? it doesn't seem to affect their results at all


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## la ressistance (Jan 19, 2012)

ymu said:


> I think the plasterer will go far in this.
> 
> Fucking hell - we can't even have a Masterchef thread without this shit. What the hell is it that makes people think it's acceptable to make comments like this?



freedom of speech?


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## ymu (Jan 19, 2012)

la ressistance said:


> freedom of speech?


You're free to say what you like, and we're free to call you a sex-case in response.


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## Espresso (Jan 19, 2012)

I see whatsisface - Tim? - last year's winner is on next week. I liked him. He was bonkers.


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## trashpony (Jan 19, 2012)

Espresso said:


> I see whatsisface - Tim? - last year's winner is on next week. I liked him. He was bonkers.


Me too.

Tonight's lot were better than last night's lot. I want Jay to win. He's not posh and he's got tatts


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## Espresso (Jan 19, 2012)

I thought Jay was pretty tasty. Him and his food.


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## la ressistance (Jan 19, 2012)

ymu said:


> You're free to say what you like, and we're free to call you a sex-case in response.


TOTAL sexcase.


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## shakespearegirl (Jan 20, 2012)

I used to work with Jonathan, FFS raw fondants!


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## BoatieBird (Jan 20, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> is there a point to the restaurant bit? it doesn't seem to affect their results at all



Hmmm, I've pondered the same question.
I think it might be to see if they still want it quite so much when they've had a taste of working in a pro kitchen.
Was there a bloke in one series who changed his mind after his first experience in the pro kitchen


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## trashpony (Jan 20, 2012)

BoatieBird said:


> Hmmm, I've pondered the same question.
> I think it might be to see if they still want it quite so much when they've had a taste of working in a pro kitchen.
> Was there a bloke in one series ago who changed his mind after his first experience in the pro kitchen


I think it's just to teach them stuff and give us a bit of variety. In the later rounds, it does count a bit doesn't it? The chefs give feedback on individuals


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## BoatieBird (Jan 20, 2012)

trashpony said:


> I think it's just to teach them stuff and give us a bit of variety. In the later rounds, it does count a bit doesn't it? The chefs give feedback on individuals



Yes, it definitely seemed to have more value in the later rounds, which was a shame for Lee as he performed really well in the pro kitchen but didn't get through.

I've just caught up on this week's episodes and I like the way the 24 were chosen _just_ on their food, I felt last year's was a bit too personality led.
But I did miss the early round fuck ups - no more deconstructed trifle moments 

Oh, and I had to fast forward the bit where the big guy blubbed, my bottom lip started to quiver in sympathy with his


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## Dan Jones (Jan 21, 2012)

Anyone else think episode 2 was just a BIT strange? http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151176756360431


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## purenarcotic (Jan 21, 2012)

The FB doesn't work.  Lack of permission to view the page.


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## Dan Jones (Jan 21, 2012)

Oh - how annoying! Let's try YouTube! - *http://youtu.be/OHTV_Udr-4o*


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## trashpony (Jan 24, 2012)

A quick reminder that Dhruv is going to be on it tonight


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## Orang Utan (Jan 24, 2012)

Who's dhruv?


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## trashpony (Jan 24, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> Who's dhruv?









He won in 2010 iirc


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## madzone (Jan 24, 2012)

Broad beans and cumin


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## purenarcotic (Jan 24, 2012)

I like the sound of loads of the dishes.  I'd hate to have to choose, tasting menu please


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## Orang Utan (Jan 24, 2012)

Ooh here's hoping the desserts will be a disaster


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## purenarcotic (Jan 24, 2012)

From the previews it looks like one of them definitely does cock up desert big time.


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## Santino (Jan 24, 2012)

Gregg had one of everything.


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## mrs quoad (Jan 24, 2012)

Raw lamb what?

Walked in too late, someone seemed unhappy!


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## purenarcotic (Jan 24, 2012)

Strings on a poussin, whatever will we do!


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## Orang Utan (Jan 24, 2012)

I would have eaten that lamb.
Looked fine to me


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## mincepie (Jan 24, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> I'm in love with Aki


Likewise...I love her enthusiasm.
Perhaps it might get annoying after a while, but still, you've got to give her credit for trying.

Besides it's nice to see people with real talent and people that really do care..unlike all the fakers on xFactor etc.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 24, 2012)

I've never seen such a small portion served as a main.  We got rid of nouvelle cuisine for good bloody reason.  I'd send it back if I'd got such a small plate of grub.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 24, 2012)

Who's the bloke who looks like an evil wizard?


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## trashpony (Jan 24, 2012)

Oh god, Matthew's gone to pieces


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## madzone (Jan 24, 2012)

Soggy bottomed tart.


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## Orang Utan (Jan 24, 2012)

Haha! Total meltdown!


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## wayward bob (Jan 24, 2012)

so mains were all shite and puds not looking much better


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## purenarcotic (Jan 24, 2012)

John cracks me up 'it's not me you've let down it's yourself' and 'how long?' 'it's definitely coming' 'christmas is also coming'


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## starfish (Jan 24, 2012)

madzone said:


> Soggy bottomed tart.



Theres been alot of them on the telly recently.


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## wayward bob (Jan 24, 2012)

i like that some of the disasters turn out to be triumphs and some of them turn out to be disasters


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## wayward bob (Jan 24, 2012)

alien boy done good


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## wayward bob (Jan 24, 2012)

charlie to go


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## wayward bob (Jan 24, 2012)

and tom


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## Orang Utan (Jan 24, 2012)

Who's alien boy?


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## trashpony (Jan 24, 2012)

charlie basically admitted that he only entered because he thought it looked like fun 

Him and Matthew to go. And possibly that dolt who served the nouvelle cuisine


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## Orang Utan (Jan 24, 2012)

Who's that weird plastic looking tiny bloke who went through? #menwholooklikeelderlylesbians


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## purenarcotic (Jan 24, 2012)

Absolutely no surprise those two went.


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## mrs quoad (Jan 24, 2012)

trashpony said:


> charlie basically admitted that he only entered because he thought it looked like fun
> 
> Him and Matthew to go. And possibly that dolt who served the nouvelle cuisine


Qft!

Cor.


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## wayward bob (Jan 24, 2012)

reprieve for tom 

alien boy is the one with big eyes but no face


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## trashpony (Jan 24, 2012)

I suspect quite a few of this lot are going to crash and burn fairly soon. Was it 3x hour long episodes last year? I thought that was just the 1st week and then it was 1/2 an hour early evening. The 9pm showing time is fucking with my other telly watching commitments


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## belboid (Jan 24, 2012)

two one hour episodes and one half hour one last year.  bizarely and stupidly. at least its only two days  a week this time.

the bouncer's looking very good, shame the plasterer is gonna be out very soon tho. and that aki isnt


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## Espresso (Jan 25, 2012)

Yeah, the right two went.
Though to be fair, I would have scoffed every last morsel of all of those dishes. Just call me Gregg.


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## dogDBC (Jan 25, 2012)

whoops


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## fen_boy (Jan 25, 2012)

Poor Matthew... was funny though.


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## Ms T (Jan 25, 2012)

Just catching up and I thought the final group were unlucky because there were only three places left. Some of the ones who went home were better than in the second group.


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## Ms T (Jan 25, 2012)

I love Jay and Aki, who is ridiculously talented.


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## trashpony (Jan 25, 2012)

My money's on Andrew's team


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## polly (Jan 25, 2012)

Foam  it always makes me think of catsick


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## purenarcotic (Jan 25, 2012)

The ox dish looks absolutely gorgeous.


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## trashpony (Jan 25, 2012)

God it does. And the chocolate thing


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## purenarcotic (Jan 25, 2012)

Hell yes.

Tomorrow's looks like it'll be laugh


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## Orang Utan (Jan 25, 2012)

it's not on tomorrow.

missed it tonight - hope to check it on i player tomorrow


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## Orangesanlemons (Jan 26, 2012)

Just seen tonight's episode. I'm still in shock at seeing Jason Atherton break out the Coleman's horseradish sauce, CATERING SIZE no less. Pure filth.


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## Schmetterling (Jan 26, 2012)

polly said:


> Foam  it always makes me think of catsick


... and spunk ...


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## FabricLiveBaby! (Jan 29, 2012)

I'm really annoyed with this "new format" masterchef.

It's taken the worst bits of Masterchef AUS and US and amalgamated them into a rubbish replica!

Bring back the old one!


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## belboid (Jan 30, 2012)

are we down to an episode a week all the time now then?  Deffo is this week, and appears to be next week too.


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## purenarcotic (Jan 30, 2012)

Yep, it's on every Wednesday at 9PM for the next five weeks then for the semi-finals and finals it'll be back to a few nights a week.


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## wayward bob (Jan 30, 2012)

the pissing about with the scheduling is the death of it i reckon


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## N_igma (Feb 1, 2012)

I'd like to see Aki cook something that isn't Japanese. You get the impression that's all she knows!


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## Santino (Feb 1, 2012)

Slippery beef


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## purenarcotic (Feb 1, 2012)

The quail was lost!  Poor lost quail.


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## N_igma (Feb 1, 2012)

Bye bye Emma.

ETA: I heard the uplifting music and I knew they chickened out of it again. How she's still in this competition is beyond me though.


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## Maggot (Feb 1, 2012)

So no one went out?  What a pointless show!


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## purenarcotic (Feb 1, 2012)

Two drop outs this year, not had that for a long time.


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## Paulie Tandoori (Feb 1, 2012)

Maggot said:


> So no one went out? What a pointless show!


that's exactly what we just said!!!  waste of an hour or what?!


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## DexterTCN (Feb 1, 2012)

False advertising, in fact.   And at least two could/should have gone.


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## Spark (Feb 2, 2012)

I'm just intrigued to know why the drop outs decided to go. The first one, Jonathan I think, was really good but suddenly semwd terrified of the fish in Jason Atherton's kitchen and panicked.


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## DexterTCN (Feb 2, 2012)

Ah...coz 2 have now dropped out it would have affected the schedule so they couldn't boot another out just now!


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## twentythreedom (Feb 2, 2012)

The japanese girl looks a bit naughty. Maybe she knows Shippy


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## wayward bob (Feb 2, 2012)

i find aki and moonface boy unwatchable now  but i'm losing interest fast as they keep fucking about with the format and the schedule


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## Santino (Feb 2, 2012)

Ashvy clearly felt out of her depth.


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## wayward bob (Feb 2, 2012)

Santino said:


> Ashvy clearly felt out of her depth.



she was. i loved the "despite her commitment to the competition" caveat that clearly meant she just bottled it


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## Santino (Feb 2, 2012)

It was curtains when she started defending her rubbish curry on the basis that she is Indian.


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## wayward bob (Feb 2, 2012)

shoulda put ground almonds in to thicken it.


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## purenarcotic (Feb 8, 2012)

I literally drooled at nearly everything being cooked in the restaurants.  Except the tortilla, which was too runny for me.  I like my eggs 'overcooked'.


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## FabricLiveBaby! (Feb 8, 2012)

purenarcotic said:


> I literally drooled at nearly everything being cooked in the restaurants. Except the tortilla, which was too runny for me. I like my eggs 'overcooked'.


 
Really?


I LOVE a runny omlette!


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## N_igma (Feb 8, 2012)

Afsana? What the fuck is going on that Scottish girl is absolutely clueless she hasn't cooked a half decent meal the whole competition!


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## Orangesanlemons (Feb 9, 2012)

I think she did one stunning dish, amidst loads of sugary rubbish. Certainly pouring hot caramel into an ice cream churner doesn't make me think "winner". That dish looked horrible.
Loved the use of colour on alien boy's Spanish dish.
Aki's face when she was saved was also a picture (a Dali, to be exact). Well funny.


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## trashpony (Feb 9, 2012)

N_igma said:


> Afsana? What the fuck is going on that Scottish girl is absolutely clueless she hasn't cooked a half decent meal the whole competition!


I know. Bloody weird - Emma's cooking has been decidedly iffy


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## purenarcotic (Feb 9, 2012)

With Emma I think they're eternally hoping that her experimental side will produce something amazing.  It just won't.


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## Schmetterling (Feb 9, 2012)

Orangesanlemons said:


> I think she did one stunning dish, amidst loads of sugary rubbish. Certainly pouring hot caramel into an ice cream churner doesn't make me think "winner". That dish looked horrible.
> Loved the use of colour on alien boy's Spanish dish.
> Aki's face when she was saved was also a picture (a Dali, to be exact). Well funny.


Her face is starting to go on my nerves!


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## Ceej (Feb 11, 2012)

Emma to go next, please - I don't like her food, (onion ice cream, anyone?) and she's miles behind everyone else.
I quite like everyone else! Aki is like an overexcited puppy!


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## Ms T (Feb 12, 2012)

N_igma said:


> Afsana? What the fuck is going on that Scottish girl is absolutely clueless she hasn't cooked a half decent meal the whole competition!


 
I thought it was pretty fair to be honest.  The apple flan/tart was pretty unimpressive given the standards of some of the others.  Afsana was never going to win.  Emma will be out next, I reckon.


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## belboid (Feb 14, 2012)

Who tried to make ice cream with booze in it, despite knowing that it wouldn't set in time cos the booze slows the process down? Whoever it was should be out, as even I was sat at home going 'boil it off first then' - it's hardly rocket science. It as Afsana wasn't it?  She made nice looking food, but had zero chance of winning.  My bro used to work with her, very nice woman apparently, and very committed. But it aint Masterchef winning food, unfortunately


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## Orang Utan (Feb 15, 2012)

haven't watched this since week 1 - is moonface boy the short ugly dark haired one?


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## wayward bob (Feb 15, 2012)

jay or aki to go today, mark my words


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## wayward bob (Feb 15, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> haven't watched this since week 1 - is moonface boy the short ugly dark haired one?


 
yeah, tbh i've started to warm to him a little


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## wayward bob (Feb 15, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> jay or aki to go today, mark my words


 
ah fuck - forgot all about emma


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## Orang Utan (Feb 15, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> yeah, tbh i've started to warm to him a little


he looks like a cross between gollum and kd lang with liver failure


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## N_igma (Feb 15, 2012)

Can we request someone put a bag over Aki's face for the rest of the competition?


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## Espresso (Feb 15, 2012)

Heh. You've got the personality of a walnut.
That'd be fighting talk where I come from


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## Orang Utan (Feb 15, 2012)

i've just been assaulted by the dreadful mental image of greg motorboating


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## Looby (Feb 15, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> yeah, tbh i've started to warm to him a little


 
Does anyone remember Tricky Dicky in Eastenders? Andrew reminds me of him so much.


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## Orang Utan (Feb 15, 2012)

sparklefish said:


> Does anyone remember Tricky Dicky in Eastenders? Andrew reminds me of him so much.


oh wow he is JUST like him


----------



## DexterTCN (Feb 15, 2012)

Aki:  I'm using the oven!.......How do I use the oven?!


----------



## Looby (Feb 15, 2012)

Aki was a fucking shambles tonight, surely she needs to go next?


----------



## maximilian ping (Feb 15, 2012)

Aki is like a small animal. Read some article where she was described as having permanent face of child on xmas day. Lol at her freezing her tits off on the coast.


----------



## trashpony (Feb 16, 2012)

I have warmed to Aki now, mainly because she is clearly absolutely bonkers. But I suspect she's not long for the competition. That pudding yesterday totally missed the point of the project.


----------



## Schmetterling (Feb 16, 2012)

What happened at the end? I had zoned out.  Who left at the end of the programme?  Do I still need to take out a hitman on Aki?


----------



## wayward bob (Feb 16, 2012)

no-one left at the end, just emma after the scottish bit.

my problem with aki is i just don't believe her food is that good - i think they're keeping her in just cos she's kooky


----------



## Schmetterling (Feb 16, 2012)

Ah; had seen that bit.  And well-deserved too. 

*kill*
*kill*
*kill*

Very unbecoming, I know!


----------



## wayward bob (Feb 16, 2012)

i am _very_ much in love with shelina


----------



## trashpony (Feb 16, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> i am _very_ much in love with shelina


Ooh me too. But I wish she wouldn't wear quite so much blusher


----------



## wayward bob (Feb 16, 2012)

trashpony said:


> Ooh me too. But I wish she wouldn't wear quite so much blusher


 
she can be as deceitful as she likes with me


----------



## pianissimo (Feb 16, 2012)

I feel sorry for Aki. Tom sabotaged her on the oven!!!! 
It really changed my opinion of him.

Emma deserves to go. I'm surprised she lasted so long. Her skills are just not up to scratch.


----------



## trashpony (Feb 16, 2012)

pianissimo said:


> I feel sorry for Aki. Tom sabotaged her on the oven!!!!
> It really changed my opinion of him.
> 
> Emma deserves to go. I'm surprised she lasted so long. Her skills are just not up to scratch.


Did he do it deliberately? 

Emma really annoyed me last night - she said something like she wasn't quite good enough last night rather than she completely stuffed it up. And WTF is doing a tart with beef about? Her plate looked like someone had puked on it too.

Aki should stay for pure comedy value - her gurning and the total mess she got into made me actually LOL last night


----------



## Me76 (Feb 16, 2012)

John was really cross with Aki too and she just reacted like an 8 year old being told off. I can't decide whether I like her or hate her, it switches at a moment's notice.


----------



## pianissimo (Feb 16, 2012)

trashpony said:


> Did he do it deliberately?


 
Shelina said to Tom, 'It's you isn't it?  Sabotage.'  And Tom smiled.  
Sneaky bastard.


----------



## polly (Feb 16, 2012)

pianissimo said:


> I feel sorry for Aki. Tom sabotaged her on the oven!!!!
> It really changed my opinion of him.
> 
> Emma deserves to go. I'm surprised she lasted so long. Her skills are just not up to scratch.


 
This, really. I can't stand her over-enthusiastic child act but did really feel for her last night. That was a cunty thing to do.

And yes - even Emma didn't think she was up to scratch!

The standard has been particularly low this year


----------



## nagapie (Feb 16, 2012)

How can people hate Aki, she's just young and slightly eccentric. I like it. I think she's amazing, obviously bright and talented. But she still keeps cooking Japanese, as in lots of bits that make up a meal, which looks delicious to me but not what's wanted from the judges.


----------



## articul8 (Feb 16, 2012)

I'm in love with Aki


----------



## Espresso (Feb 16, 2012)

I'm not someone who hates Aki, but I find the whole wide-eyed winsome, little girlywirly, oooo!-ness of her a bit on the irksome side.
She's a physics PhD student, so she's no dimbo. Intelligent and educated grown women who bounce and skitter around like small children so as older men will give them an easy ride always exasperate me. She's a prime example of the breed, so she gets on my wick a bit.

I am another one who thinks Shelina is beautiful. Though I might be the only one who would quite like to ravish Jay.

Sorry. We're supposed to be talking about cooking, aren't we?


----------



## trashpony (Feb 16, 2012)

Espresso said:


> I'm not someone who hates Aki, but I find the whole wide-eyed winsome, little girlywirly, oooo!-ness of her a bit on the irksome side.
> She's a physics PhD student, so she's no dimbo. Intelligent and educated grown women who bounce and skitter around like small children so as older men will give them an easy ride always exasperate me. She's a prime example of the breed, so she gets on my wick a bit.
> 
> I am another one who thinks Shelina is beautiful. *Though I might be the only one who would quite like to ravish Jay.*
> ...


 
Nope


----------



## belboid (Feb 16, 2012)

nagapie said:


> How can people hate Aki, she's just young and slightly eccentric.


she's an eejit trying to be wacky.  Full of heself too.  And ger food isn't that good.  Other than that....

We're not wild about Shelina either. Not sure why, I think she's just...too dull. And looks like the former Diversity Manager that she is.  Tho I should feel a little sorry for her, as she probably had a hard childhood.  What with beng called 'Permalloo' n all

Neither of them were as bad as that line of 'artisan food prducers' tho.  Dear god, they all looked so in need of being mown down with a machine gun.

Andrew changed the oven temp, if anyone did, imo.

Me bro went for dinner at L'Eclume on tuesday night.  He liked it.


----------



## Orang Utan (Feb 16, 2012)

i don't think aki is 'trying' to be anything. she is just like that. i like her.


----------



## uk benzo (Feb 16, 2012)

Aki... she's lovely.


----------



## belboid (Feb 17, 2012)

phew, those souffle shots _weren't_ faked

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-17074544


----------



## Espresso (Feb 22, 2012)

Shelina and Jay are having a right old flirt-fest over their puddings.


----------



## Santino (Feb 22, 2012)

What the fuck is with Tom Kitchin's accent?


----------



## purenarcotic (Feb 22, 2012)

Olive and chocolate?  I really can't get my head around it.


----------



## trashpony (Feb 22, 2012)

Chewing on a fag butt


----------



## N_igma (Feb 22, 2012)

Bye bye Aki.


----------



## Espresso (Feb 22, 2012)

I think Jay might be for the chop.
Only Andrew sailed through, to be right. Well done to him. The rest of them had issues of one sort or another.


----------



## uk benzo (Feb 22, 2012)

No!!!! Not Aki!


----------



## trashpony (Feb 22, 2012)

Good


----------



## fen_boy (Feb 22, 2012)

Jay should have gone, the ham-fisted meat and two veg merchant.


----------



## purenarcotic (Feb 22, 2012)

YES. THANK GOODNESS.  

Bye bye annoying Aki, you won't be missed.


----------



## uk benzo (Feb 22, 2012)

fen_boy said:


> Jay should have gone, the ham-fisted meat and two veg merchant.


 
Agreed.

Aki was innovative, kooky and very cute!


----------



## trashpony (Feb 22, 2012)

I think some of you may be letting your pricks rule your heads


----------



## N_igma (Feb 22, 2012)

uk benzo said:


> Aki was innovative, kooky and very cute!


 
But served food that tasted like cigarette butts. Go figure.


----------



## uk benzo (Feb 22, 2012)

As opposed to the guy who served food his meat raw?


----------



## Callie (Feb 22, 2012)

Nothing wrong with a bit of raw meat. Especially if you like BUMWORMS


----------



## gosub (Feb 22, 2012)

Santino said:


> What the fuck is with Tom Kitchin's accent?


Who cares.  His food is great. Had his tasting menu last week


----------



## Tobermory53 (Feb 23, 2012)

Santino said:


> What the fuck is with Tom Kitchin's accent?


 


accent?


----------



## Schmetterling (Feb 23, 2012)

fen_boy said:


> Jay should have gone, the ham-fisted meat and two veg merchant.


 I can't tell him and Amon apart....


----------



## trashpony (Feb 29, 2012)

Shelina FTW


----------



## Me76 (Mar 1, 2012)

Eamonn proper did himself in last night. Andrew pulled it out of the bag from previous weeks. Jay will go next as he isn't pushing the boundries enough and safe cooking is not what gets you through.

Ooo and Tom's mango and chos pudding last night looked well lush!


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 1, 2012)

i was delighted to see eamon go last night, not least cos he was cocky as fuck and thought he had it in the bag 

i'm rooting for andrew to be the next one out. sorry i just find him too freaky  (anyone else go noooooo! he lives with his mum! in the intro bits? )


----------



## Me76 (Mar 1, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> i was delighted to see eamon go last night, not least cos he was cocky as fuck and thought he had it in the bag
> 
> i'm rooting for andrew to be the next one out. sorry i just find him too freaky  (anyone else go noooooo! he lives with his mum! in the intro bits? )


I didn't notice that he lived with his mum...he has a kid doesn't he? so if he does it's probably out of necessity and he is living there with his family as well, which I don't find as bad as a single man in his 30s living with his mum. 

I do find something a bit odd about him though.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 1, 2012)

i meant, no way does he have a wife and kid. he *must* live with his mum


----------



## trashpony (Mar 1, 2012)

He lives with his mum and his wife and his baby and he's a financial analyst??  I thought they earned £££. I liked Shelina even more when it was clear she is a Tooting lass 

x-posted 

He cries too much for my liking


----------



## Me76 (Mar 1, 2012)

Aaahhh, I getcha!


----------



## Me76 (Mar 1, 2012)

Shelina used to work where I do now.  I never met her though.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 1, 2012)

i am still head-over-heels in love with shelina  i'd give tom one too


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 1, 2012)

reminder for their piss-poor scheduling: next ep tonight


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 1, 2012)

Thailand chaos looks fun, John's face at the very last bit of the episode looks a complete joy.


----------



## polly (Mar 1, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> reminder for their piss-poor scheduling: next ep tonight


 
BBC scheduling people have not got a scoobie. These are the people who put Arrested Development on at midnight on weeknights 

Anyway, thank you!! I have just seen this in the nick of time


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 1, 2012)

That market just looks incredible.  On my list of places to eat before I die.


----------



## articul8 (Mar 1, 2012)

Aki's gone


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 1, 2012)

'Harder, harder, harder! More, more, more!'


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 1, 2012)

Greatly enjoyed seeing Greg scorchioed.

Greg: "OOOOF that's a lot of chilli. OOOFF what a kick.@

John: "actually, I thought that needed a BIT MOAR CHILLI.@

Get in.

e2a: btw, is it really fair to these poor villagers to give their finest produce to a bunch of TV ministars who've NEVER TOUCHED OR TASTED HALF THE INGREDIENTS BEFORE IN THEIR LIVES?


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 1, 2012)

These are quite alarming amounts of chillies getting used here.


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 1, 2012)

i kinda got the impression that 'up in the hills' implied some kind of rurality.

However, it seems that they not only have access to a full,perfectly polished industrial kitchen; they've also got a full range of posh-shaped bowls and dishes.

Ay?


----------



## polly (Mar 1, 2012)

It looks so delicious  *munches desperately on half stale Doritos*

I hope that beardy bloke who sabotaged Aki gets the boot. Does someone go today? I can't keep up.


----------



## twentythreedom (Mar 1, 2012)

thai food markets are amazing. I lived with a family there for a few months, every day we'd go shopping for all the days food, all fresh ingredients, cheap as, then my thai mama would amaze me with incredible dishes of beautiful food  The MC crew done well so far!! Me hungry now....


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 1, 2012)

Rainbow cake.


----------



## twentythreedom (Mar 1, 2012)

Missed it last week, gutted Aki went. She would've done well with the Thai food I reckon..


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 1, 2012)

polly said:


> I hope that beardy bloke who sabotaged Aki gets the boot. Does someone go today? I can't keep up.


Tom? What happened?  I've got a couple of catch-ups to go.

Don't think anyone's going today, unless the King's going to execute the loser.


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 1, 2012)

Jay is next to go I reckon.  The others have proper pushed the boat out and he's nearly finished his prep early. 

I don't think they go this episode; usually they do some ridiculous challenge, then the next episode is just them cooking their own food and the final three being chosen from that.


----------



## N_igma (Mar 1, 2012)

Why is John telling them how to cook and what to do? Royal families deserve to eat shit anyhow.


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 1, 2012)

Jay is proper balls-out mostly.


----------



## Espresso (Mar 1, 2012)

I see Mr Prince is going to do something rude to anyone who's food he doesn't like. 
Oooo-er!


----------



## polly (Mar 1, 2012)

mrs quoad said:


> Tom? What happened?  I've got a couple of catch-ups to go.
> 
> Don't think anyone's going today, unless the King's going to execute the loser.


 
A few episodes ago he apparently turned down one of the ovens she was using so her pudding flopped. As annoying as I found her, this isn't the Apprentice. Not very sporting at all.

 Did you hear that?? The prince bloke actually _wants _to punish the loser!


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 1, 2012)

pianissimo said:


> I feel sorry for Aki. Tom sabotaged her on the oven!!!!
> It really changed my opinion of him.
> 
> Emma deserves to go. I'm surprised she lasted so long. Her skills are just not up to scratch.


This ^^^ is my top google hit for tom aki oven masterchef


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 1, 2012)

OOO.



> Tom tried to sabotage Shelina by 'accidentally' binning her White Truffle! Not an apology in sight. Disgraceful.


 
I remember that! He seemed so innocent at the time!


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 1, 2012)

Hurrah, next week is cakes and pastries!  Will have to get some cake in especially.


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 1, 2012)

purenarcotic said:


> Hurrah, next week is cakes and pastries! Will have to get some cake in especially.


I have a feeling Jay might thrive on cakes.


----------



## belboid (Mar 1, 2012)

mrs quoad said:


> i kinda got the impression that 'up in the hills' implied some kind of rurality.
> 
> However, it seems that they not only have access to a full,perfectly polished industrial kitchen; they've also got a full range of posh-shaped bowls and dishes.
> 
> Ay?


that village site was set up by that wanker Prince as a way of getting some people to forget what scum he and his family are (not that anyone in thailand would say that, seeing as all criticism of the ryals is illegal).  I'm not surprised he'd have put a kitchen in too - makes it a nice stop for the tourists, proving just how wonderful and caring the system is


polly said:


> A few episodes ago he apparently turned down one of the ovens she was using so her pudding flopped. As annoying as I found her, this isn't the Apprentice. Not very sporting at all.


it was Andrew, not Tom who did that.


----------



## belboid (Mar 1, 2012)

Scheduling is just fucking  stupid. Two this week, one nest, then three the week after that.  Would have made far more sense to just have last nights this week, when someone actually went out, rather than the final four hanging on for an extra, cruel six days.

btw, anyone see the thing in saturdays guardian? the 2010 aussie masterchef was there 3rd most watched programme ever.  the 2011 israeli final topped that, with the highest viewing figures in the colonial settler state


----------



## Part 2 (Mar 1, 2012)

Fuck knows why I watch this before going to bed feeling hungry.

Jay looks set to be next to go. He's the hardest grafter by far and never has the time issues the others have but he plays it safe too often and when he has tried to do something different he hasn't got it quite right.

Andrew makes nice food but too many time issues so I don't think he'll win, and he really is weird looking.

It was Tom who turned down the oven. I see him or Shalina winning both have cooked the best stuff over the weeks. I reckon she'll edge it.


----------



## polly (Mar 2, 2012)

belboid said:


> it was Andrew, not Tom who did that.


 
To be fair to Tom, it wasn't obvious who did it, but it definitely looked like it was him. He may also have form - see post 253 

What made you think it was Andrew?


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 2, 2012)

It would be ace if Shelina won, her food has been lovely throughout.


----------



## Lea (Mar 2, 2012)

Thought the food looked well tasty last night even the dish with cockroaches in it!


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 2, 2012)

purenarcotic said:


> It would be ace if Shelina won, her food has been lovely throughout.


I missed a few eps (still catching up) but I seem to remember that she had a bit of a pig's ear in the Jane Austin challenge.

Her team won; but there were several Bad things going on with her cooking. I thought.

tbh, I'm probably making that up.


----------



## belboid (Mar 2, 2012)

I just can't warm to Shelina as a person. Tom _may_ have been a bit cheeky once or twice, but he still makes the food I most want to eat.


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 2, 2012)

I'm watching ep. 8 at the moment.

Emma's just knocked out a catastrophic mushroom tart.

Aki is fizzing at the bunghole about her English picnic 

John: I want to hate it. And I don't.

"Honey fish whiskey biscuit" oh dear


----------



## Maggot (Mar 2, 2012)

I don't think Wallace should be judging other people's cooking when his own restaurant is so awful.

http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/resta...le-at-the-bermondsey-square-hotel---review.do


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 2, 2012)

"Maybe Wallace was hoping to click into that vintage-kitsch mood on sale in the little boutiques of so many gentrifying streets in London now? Instead he's delivered almost the full horror of the original. Starters include the likes of Welsh rarebit, ham with melon, crab paste and eggs with salad cream. Mains include chicken Kiev, boiled beef and carrots, and steak and chips; puddings feature Black Forest gâteau, Spotted Dick and custard and tropical fruit cocktail. The dishes have been modernised a bit but, as Basil Fawlty found with Ronald, the irksome son of two guests, that doesn't always hit the spot."


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 2, 2012)

Maggot said:


> I don't think Wallace should be judging other people's cooking when his own restaurant is so awful.
> 
> http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/resta...le-at-the-bermondsey-square-hotel---review.do


 
The restaurant may well be shite, but the condecension dripping off that review is a bit London twattish.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 7, 2012)

is anyone getting kicked out tonight?


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 7, 2012)

Yes, tonight we find out our three finalists.

Pastries, my favourite.


----------



## Gerry1time (Mar 7, 2012)

What the fuck is going on? Some sort of 70's TV necromancy dinner?


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 7, 2012)

No, it doesn't have to be 70s themed, the celebs just happened to make their names in the 70s.


----------



## Part 2 (Mar 7, 2012)

Did i just spot Sally James off Tiswas?


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 7, 2012)

Chip Barm said:


> Did i just spot Sally James off Tiswas?


 
Think that's Yvette from Allo Allo


----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 7, 2012)

Jesus Christ! don't be on a diet and watch people cream their pants about a variety of yummy things.

Never, ever


----------



## trashpony (Mar 7, 2012)

I think it's right that Jay went. Shelina to win, still. She is not cocking up at all. And she does have the most lovely teeth


----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 7, 2012)

I was just saying how beautiful she is.


----------



## trashpony (Mar 7, 2012)

lizzieloo said:


> I was just saying how beautiful she is.


She is isn't she? Plus she looks like she's really fun - she does an excellent naughty face. I like naughty faces


----------



## sleaterkinney (Mar 7, 2012)

I liked the way she said "there you go" when she plonked her desserts down.​​I hope Andrew wins, he keeps trying stuff.​


----------



## trashpony (Mar 7, 2012)

His food doesn't taste very nice though. And however brave you are, if it doesn't taste good, there's no point


----------



## Ceej (Mar 7, 2012)

Shelina to win definitely, smart and gorgeous - alien Andrew's food is beautiful but a bit too strange, and Tom is so
far up himself and so sure he can do twice as much as everyone else, despite all the evidence to the contrary. Focused, yes, but likeable not at all.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 8, 2012)

aw i find tom really likeable. he's just having such a ball and yeah he keeps pushing himself too much, but so far it's worked for him. i like how he shrugs off mistakes and just keeps on enjoying himself. obvs he's gonna spoon the final though  shelina ftw


----------



## Ms T (Mar 8, 2012)

Shelina it seems to me is the one who's progressed most.  She started off making tasty but unrefined Mauritian food, and is now turning out beautiful dishes on a regular basis.  I think Tom or Andrew will win though, because they're the most creative.  I actually find Andrew quite sweet, but Tom is a bit annoying.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 8, 2012)

i loved what tom said about it like being at school but a school you actually want to be at. i guess i feel the same about college atm


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 8, 2012)

Oh, fucksticks, missed one?

Best do a bit of catch-up this evening / tomoz


----------



## N_igma (Mar 8, 2012)

Is the quality this year just atrocious or is it me having high expectations after Masterchef The Professionals?


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 11, 2012)

Jesus. Z-list celebrity field day PLUS tim brooke-taylor!


----------



## TheHoodedClaw (Mar 11, 2012)

Shelina fans and twitter users : https://twitter.com/#!/hungrymauritian


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 14, 2012)

Shelina to win by a country mile.  Her food looks great, appears to taste great and she's been consistently good throughout.  Andrew's food is definitely interesting but he makes too many minor errors I think.  Tom is great but not in contention ime.


----------



## polly (Mar 14, 2012)

purenarcotic said:


> Shelina to win by a country mile.


 
Agreed - she got a really good edit tonight too in the little montage bit, while the other two had their mistakes highlighted. Also, Tom has something of the psychopathic about him and Andrew is too wet for words, while Shelina is plain lovely. (She looks just like my stepsister too /irrelevant)


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2012)

two horse race: tom vs shelina. tom really shone last night i reckon, if he can get his timings sorted he has a good chance.

andrew screwed up big time: basically what tom kitchin was saying is he can cook *other people's food* (with help!) but his food is rubbish


----------



## trashpony (Mar 15, 2012)

Andrew's food looks pretty but it doesn't taste nice. He has a duff palate.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2012)

i don't think it always looks nice either: that abomination with the black and red stuff smeared over the plate springs to mind


----------



## N_igma (Mar 15, 2012)

Shelina has been the most consistent so far so deserves to win, unless she fucks up big time but I don't see it. I like Tom's inventiveness but he has timing issues and doesn't always plate up the best food. Andrew can pull it out of the bag now and again but is well behind the other two.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2012)

i've really enjoyed this series cos i can see parallels with them getting to play in grownups' kitchens and me getting to play with all the stuff at college. and the whole pointless tasks/getting critiqued and potentially kicked out thing too  mr b was saying he was proud of how i've been working lately and the whole lot sounded like john whatshisface  in my next artists statement i shall be sure to include mention of my journey, how passionate i am and how we're all winners for getting this far 

(i guess this is why i relate so much to tom: massively overambitious, never gets finished in time but refuses to do it any other way )


----------



## belboid (Mar 15, 2012)

only just caught up with last nights....glad Tom did good, but it's Shelina's to lose.  She has been too consistent, and always damned good, even though I think I'd rather eat Tom's food. As long as he actually finished it all in time.

And, as usual, am off out tonight, so will miss the last show until tomorrow night (after mrs b comes back from the pub!). The odds on me not seeing something on the news or in fridays Guardian......well, it hasnt happened yet....


----------



## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

i think Tom should shave his beard in the final....


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2012)

not into the final dish?


----------



## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

I'm suprised half his dishes don't end up in his beard tbh


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2012)

i can think of a few things i wouldn't mind ending up in his beard 

</inappropriatecrush>


----------



## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

ha ha yeah he is quite fit. The beard needs to go though


----------



## Steel Icarus (Mar 15, 2012)

Shelina to win. I would eat her food like billy-o. And her, too - she _fine_.


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2012)

oi  i think you'll find there's a queue


----------



## wayward bob (Mar 15, 2012)

fiver says shelina uses mango in her pudding


----------



## wtfftw (Mar 15, 2012)

Finally caught up with the programme and the thread.   Shelina ftw.


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 15, 2012)

I haven't been able to watch most if this but am watching now.
That Andrew is well unpleasant to look at. He shouldn't have got past the entry stage. 
What's wrong with the other chap's beard? It suits him!


----------



## wtfftw (Mar 15, 2012)

Heh. Look!
Wasn't going to bet against. 


edit: tried to quote Bob


----------



## purenarcotic (Mar 15, 2012)

Shelina for it.  I want to be eating her food.  Mutton curry, octopus, a sweet samosa?  Yes fucking please.


----------



## lizzieloo (Mar 15, 2012)

This last minute thing is silly, i bet it was nowhere near that close


----------



## mrs quoad (Mar 15, 2012)

Crikey, Tom's getting some arse licking.


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 15, 2012)

Wow! Look at Shelina's food!


----------



## Santino (Mar 15, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> That Andrew is well unpleasant to look at. He shouldn't have got past the entry stage.


You terrible, terrible racist.


----------



## Santino (Mar 15, 2012)

Strawberry pork.


----------



## Orang Utan (Mar 15, 2012)

Santino said:


> You terrible, terrible racist.


Uglyist you mean! Or perhaps alienist.
He's the racist. He cooked a Jew.


----------



## Part 2 (Mar 15, 2012)

Andrew fucks it up again


----------



## trashpony (Mar 15, 2012)

Strawberries? You idiot


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## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

really irritates me the way Greg & John comment on bits of the contestant's dishes they blatently haven't tasted.

Shalina is so going to win. John and Gregg are in love with her


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## Espresso (Mar 15, 2012)

I don't think they're the only two who are in love with her. I've been having a right old girl crush on her for weeeeeeeks now.


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## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

she is pretty gorgeous tbh. i want her skin. And smile


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## Orang Utan (Mar 15, 2012)

Hellsbells said:


> really irritates me the way Greg & John comment on bits of the contestant's dishes they blatently haven't tasted.


What do you mean? They taste everything, surely


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## Espresso (Mar 15, 2012)

Tell you what though, there can't be a mango left in the whole of Hampshire, the rate she goes through them.


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## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

Orang Utan said:


> What do you mean? They taste everything, surely


 
but you can see what's left untouched on the plates, while they're going on about the taste of stuff that's clearly not been eaten


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## Orang Utan (Mar 15, 2012)

They have a bit of everything!


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## purenarcotic (Mar 15, 2012)

That's just the way it's cut, surely?

I hate all this 'omg they're so great', just tell us who's fucking won.


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## Espresso (Mar 15, 2012)

Shelina's won, no question


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## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

yes i know who they want as well!


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## Greebo (Mar 15, 2012)

Arggh kill the music!


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## lizzieloo (Mar 15, 2012)

wibble


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## purenarcotic (Mar 15, 2012)

YAY!


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## lizzieloo (Mar 15, 2012)

woo hoo


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## Hellsbells (Mar 15, 2012)

they didn't even do a proper pause before anouncing her name, it was that obvious


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## Orang Utan (Mar 15, 2012)

Nah, they don't eat it all but they taste a bit of everything. 

Yay Shelina!


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## trashpony (Mar 15, 2012)

Hellsbells said:


> they didn't even do a proper pause before anouncing her name, it was that obvious


It's been obvious for weeks tbf


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## Orang Utan (Mar 15, 2012)

Teehee, her surname is Permaloo


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## Steel Icarus (Mar 15, 2012)

wayward bob said:


> oi  i think you'll find there's a queue


 
Er...something vile about seconds.


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## Me76 (Mar 16, 2012)

Haven't read the rest of the thread because I didn't get to watch it last night but my boss just came in and told me who won.


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## belboid (Mar 16, 2012)

fucketty fuck.  Fucking Radcliffe & Maconie. Successfully avoided hearing/seeing anything, until they blurt it out whilst interviewing _Laura Marling_. Cos when speaking to a top folkie dude, how well she can cook is clearly the most vital question.  Buggers.

Oh well, I said I knew she'd win anyway I suppose


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## Orangesanlemons (Mar 17, 2012)

Just caught up with the final episode. Shelina a worthy winner obviously, her final three dishes looked amazing.

But am I right in thinking that in Andrew's intro piece they showed an arty-looking photo of the moment he proposed to his wife? Surely that means a) he had a mate with a camera hiding in the bushes as he popped the question, or b) they posed for it later, tears and all.

Very strange!


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## belboid (Mar 17, 2012)

I assumed it was A


They blatantly just picked on something, anything, to criticise in Toms final meal, the rhubarb was probably perfectly cooked, but they needed something to distinguish him from their already decided winner. Tho there is certainly no denying that her food looked damned nice.  I thinkI'd rather go to a restaurant run by Tom, and that's only partly because I'd demand a free glass of wine for every ten minutes each dish was late


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## ymu (Mar 17, 2012)

All three finalists could produce flawless food and they'd say so (I remember one year where there was one critical comment between three of them). It's not all decided on the final challenge.


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## belboid (Mar 17, 2012)

clearly.  Shelina could have curled one out onto her plate and they'd still have said it tasted marvellous last night.  As others have said, her consistency over the whole series, and especially the last week, was way ahead of the other two.


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## belboid (Mar 29, 2012)

from popbitch:

  The winner and two runners-up of
   MasterChef 2012 celebrated the results
   in the unlikely setting of Giraffe,
   Soho. After dancing around, almost
   knocking people over, one of them
   passed out and they all left without
   tipping. They might be able to cook,
   but it seems like they still need to
   learn how to behave in restaurants


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## mrs quoad (Mar 29, 2012)

belboid said:


> from popbitch:
> 
> The winner and two runners-up of
> MasterChef 2012 celebrated the results
> ...


O.

M.

G.

That is all.

e2a: apart from:

F.

That is now all.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 30, 2012)

There's a small chance it was made up by someone innit.


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## trashpony (Mar 30, 2012)

They celebrated in Giraffe? That sounds very unlikely


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## mrs quoad (Aug 5, 2012)

Aki's now doing Japanese cooking teachery. 

http://www.akicooks.co.uk/


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