# Be a mentor



## Julia Bleet (Mar 25, 2014)

Be a mentor


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## editor (Mar 25, 2014)

(*ed: thread moved to Noticeboard forum)


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## Corax (Mar 25, 2014)

Is this only a Brixton/London thing?

I'd not do it right now, but it's the type of thing I might aspire towards when I've got my shit together and started consistently acting like a grown-up...


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## editor (Mar 25, 2014)

I really like the idea of mentoring. Hmm.


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## Julia Bleet (Mar 25, 2014)

Corax said:


> Is this only a Brixton/London thing?
> 
> I'd not do it right now, but it's the type of thing I might aspire towards when I've got my shit together and started consistently acting like a grown-up...


yes this is something to take


editor said:


> I really like the idea of mentoring. Hmm.


 Do it, why not come along for the next information evening on 8th fo April?


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## Corax (Mar 25, 2014)

Julia Bleet said:


> yes this is something to take


Sorry Julia - not quite sure what that means?


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## Corax (Mar 25, 2014)

editor said:


> I really like the idea of mentoring. Hmm.


You should do it.  Don't want to blow smoke up you arse iykwim - but you've achieved a fair bit, doing things you're genuinely in to, without selling your soul (afaik).  In contrast I suspect the majority of people putting themselves forwards as mentors are likely to be well-meaning middle-class types without the breadth of experience that you can draw upon.  I can think of many people off these boards that would be a great counterbalance to that actually.  Not naming names, but there are a lot I can think of who have a ton more *wisdom* about life in general than you'll ever find in your standard 'pillar of the community' demographic.


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## littlebabyjesus (Mar 25, 2014)

I think blowing smoke up arses will be frowned upon.


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## 1%er (Mar 25, 2014)

Corax said:


> ...........  In contrast I suspect the majority of people putting themselves forwards as mentors are likely to be well-meaning middle-class types without the breadth of experience that you can draw upon.


How many mentors have you met?


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## Corax (Mar 25, 2014)

1%er said:


> How many mentors have you met?


Several.  Most have been great people - but most have either had a relatively narrow experience of life, or been a bit 'one day I had a revelation'.  Not slagging them off though - I'm damn sure they were very good mentors in many respects.  And they're certainly adding more real value to their community than I do most of the time atm.


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## 1%er (Mar 25, 2014)

Julia Bleet I wish you every success with your project, good luck.



Corax said:


> Several.  Most have been great people - but most have either had a relatively narrow experience of life, or been a bit 'one day I had a revelation'.  Not slagging them off though - I'm damn sure they were very good mentors in many respects.


The first skill with mentoring is matching the mentor with the mentee, I have seem some amazing changes in kids that have had the "right" mentor. I can't speak about the UK but 90% of the mentors I have worked with over the years have come from with-in the community or a similar environment to the mentee, the other 10% were professionals such as teachers ect.

The mentor needs to be someone the mentee (I hate that word every time I type it) can relate to, look-up to and respect. Middleclass do-gooders just wouldn't cut it, they be seen through in my experience.


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## littlebabyjesus (Mar 25, 2014)

1%er said:


> Julia Bleet
> 
> The first skill with mentoring is matching the mentor with the mentee, I have seem some amazing changes in kids that have had the "right" mentor. I can't speak about the UK but 90% of the mentors I have worked with over the years have come from with-in the community or a similar environment to the mentee, the other 10% were professionals such as teachers ect.
> 
> The mentor needs to be someone the mentee (I hate that word every time I type it) can relate to, look-up to and respect. Middleclass do-gooders just wouldn't cut it, they be seen through in my experience.


Do you do it in Brazil? TBH I find the idea of labelling a whole raft of people 'middle-class do-gooders' rather depressing. And there are lots of ways to relate to kids that don't necessitate coming from the same background as them. You'll only be seen through if you pretend to be something you're not. 

Anyhow, a mentor is a 'do-gooder' by definition. What's wrong with being a do-gooder?


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## 1%er (Mar 25, 2014)

littlebabyjesus said:


> Do you do it in Brazil? TBH I find the idea of labelling a whole raft of people 'middle-class do-gooders' rather depressing. And there are lots of ways to relate to kids that don't necessitate coming from the same background as them.
> 
> Anyhow, a mentor is a 'do-gooder' by definition. What's wrong with being a do-gooder?


If they have the correct motivation any class of person can be a great mentor.

"Middle-class do-gooders" is my translation of the people described in the post I was responding to by Corax, who wrote "In contrast I suspect the majority of people putting themselves forwards as mentors are likely to be well-meaning middle-class types without the breadth of experience that you can draw upon"

To be clear I wouldn't right anyone off for "class" reasons for mentoring, you have misinterpreted my post


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## littlebabyjesus (Mar 25, 2014)

Fair dos.


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## 1%er (Mar 25, 2014)

littlebabyjesus said:


> Do you do it in Brazil?


Wanted to deal with this as a separate issue.

I have in the past, but mostly I have been involved in facilitating these types of projects.

With regard to Brazil they have had projects here for years with names like "irmão mais velho" (big brother/eldest brother etc.) It is a massive commitment with some kids and with others it just someone outside the family to talk to.


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## Corax (Mar 25, 2014)

1%er said:


> If they have the correct motivation any class of person can be a great mentor.
> 
> "Middle-class do-gooders" is my translation of the people described in the post I was responding to by Corax, who wrote "In contrast I suspect the majority of people putting themselves forwards as mentors are likely to be well-meaning middle-class types without the breadth of experience that you can draw upon"
> 
> To be clear I wouldn't right anyone off for "class" reasons for mentoring, you have misinterpreted my post


Aye - I was probably guilty of a bit of hyperbole and stereotyping there.

Sounds great work you're doing Julia Bleet


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## Julia Bleet (Mar 26, 2014)

Corax said:


> Sorry Julia - not quite sure what that means?


 Sorry I didnt realise this sent, I'm new to this.  I meant that mentoring should only be done if your serious about it and are able to comit to it.


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