# The BT Adverts: Is that couple okay?



## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

Why is he eyeing up that girl in the record shop? I'm worried.

And i'm confused in one of the adverts, when he drops his towel she doesn't care and in one of them she likes it it.

I hope they're okay.


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## sonik (May 29, 2008)

These ads are like the old Nescafe adverts!


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## Belushi (May 29, 2008)

whe she going to realise he's grooming those kids?


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## keybored (May 29, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> Why is he eyeing up that girl in the record shop? I'm worried.



He wants to keep a better eye on the road next time he crosses.


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## dessiato (May 29, 2008)

not seen them here, any one know of a link?


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## keybored (May 29, 2008)

You sure you want this?



More on the right.


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## Augie March (May 29, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> I hope they're okay.



I hope that their marriage gradually falls apart over the course of the adverts. He starts playing away, she starts drinking heavily, one of the kids starts to take up drugs. What's that? You're worried she's up in her room all the time? Yeah, it's probably because she's started shooting up in protest at the transparently unhappy family dynamic that surrounds her miserable life.


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## dessiato (May 29, 2008)

keypulse said:


> You sure you want this?
> 
> 
> 
> More on the right.




I love advertising.


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## girasol (May 29, 2008)

They took away the bit where he was flirting with the girl at the record shop, they showed it a couple of times and then stopped.  I wonder why! 

Not that there's anything wrong with flirting, lots of people in relationships do it just for fun, but I bet that got a lot of complaints...


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## Scarlette (May 29, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> Why is he eyeing up that girl in the record shop? I'm worried.
> 
> And i'm confused in one of the adverts, when he drops his towel she doesn't care and in one of them she likes it it.
> 
> I hope they're okay.



I felt quite cross when he was eyeing up the girl. But I like it when she is unimpressed with him dropping the towel. I think that's quite realistic. My ex used to march about posing and naked when I was on the phone and my reaction was often quite similar.

But then there's the new baby/new folder confusion. Is she disappointed or relieved that he doesn't want a new baby? And is he deliberating being obtuse, because I think that's quite mean.


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

milly molly said:


> I felt quite cross when he was eyeing up the girl. But I like it when she is unimpressed with him dropping the towel. I think that's quite realistic. My ex used to march about posing and naked when I was on the phone and my reaction was often quite similar.
> 
> But then there's the new baby/new folder confusion. Is she disappointed or relieved that he doesn't want a new baby? And is he deliberating being obtuse, because I think that's quite mean.



yeahbut in the recent ones she doesn't ignore him when he drops hit towel, she says 'i'll have to call you back' to her friend. which, really, i don't think would happen. and is quite rude to the friend.

i don't think he meant to make her think he wanted a baby, if he did, maybe he was testing her reaction.

i bet she does get preggers soon though.


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## Santino (May 29, 2008)

In the first advert he is hit by a car, all the rest of them are figments of his imagination as he lies dying in the road.


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## Vintage Paw (May 29, 2008)

Him looking at that girl in the record shop sat really uncomfortably with me. I know it's fine to flirt a little, but doesn't it send out a confusing message in an advert all about him having taken on this older woman, already with 2 kids and baggage???

Yes, I too am concerned.


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> Him looking at that girl in the record shop sat really uncomfortably with me. I know it's fine to flirt a little, but doesn't it send out a confusing message in an advert all about him having taken on this older woman, already with 2 kids and baggage???
> 
> Yes, I too am concerned.



yeah i hope he's not bored of the baggage and looking for a foot loose and fancy free life.


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## Pip (May 29, 2008)

Didn't he flirt with the same girl not long ago and make an arse of himself? Is he stalking her?


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## Vintage Paw (May 29, 2008)

Enid Laundromat said:


> Didn't he flirt with the same girl not long ago and make an arse of himself? Is he stalking her?



O Rly? 

The plot thickens.

Is there somewhere we could send cards of support, perhaps?


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## aqua (May 29, 2008)

is it just me that laughed at the line "I'm worried she might be ............... a geek"


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## Vintage Paw (May 29, 2008)

aqua said:


> is it just me that laughed at the line "I'm worried she might be ............... a geek"



I thought that was quite sweet 

So, the message is clearly: don't worry about your kids being groomed on the net, 'cause your step-dad's already doing it in the house.


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## girasol (May 29, 2008)

Enid Laundromat said:


> Didn't he flirt with the same girl not long ago and make an arse of himself? Is he stalking her?



At some party, wasn't it? 

the man is a filthy whore!!!


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## internetstalker (May 29, 2008)

thes adverts remind me a bit of me and Mrs Stalker.
she's older then me with kids.

and i'm always dropping the towel in front of her


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## Vintage Paw (May 29, 2008)

internetstalker said:


> thes adverts remind me a bit of me and Mrs Stalker.
> she's older then me with kids.
> 
> and i'm always dropping the towel in front of her



Stop flirting 

You'll ruin an entire family you bastard


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## CharlieAddict (May 29, 2008)

those kids aren't his are they?
they were baggage from last marriage i think - just remembering one advert when the little girl was using HIS BT line to call her biological dad. fuckin' taking the piss if you ask me.

anyway, he can do what the fuck he likes me thinks.
shag that pretty woman in the record shop all fuckin' day.
it's clearly that his wife and her children are taking the piss.


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

Iemanja said:


> At some party, wasn't it?
> 
> the man is a filthy whore!!!



oh god yes, she does look similar.

 this is getting very worrying now. i think we need to save the mum from this horrible cad/stalker.


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## T & P (May 29, 2008)

She's quite nice. Would.

[/phroaarrr]


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

T & P said:


> She's quite nice. Would.
> 
> [/phroaarrr]



the mum or the hussy in the record shop?


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## KeyboardJockey (May 29, 2008)

I fancy both of them.  Just right for a suburban threesome. 







<scarpers after lowering the tone>


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## girasol (May 29, 2008)

This is so much more entertaining than 'sex and the city' 

'no sex and the suburb'


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## kabbes (May 29, 2008)

I think that the stick-man storyboard thread has inadvertantly revealed the true plot of the adverts and any minute a sheep with a grenade will come bursting into their unhappy suburban life.


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## stdPikachu (May 29, 2008)

To think that Art from the wonderful My Life In Film could stoop so low makes me cry


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

stdPikachu said:


> To think that Art from the wonderful My Life In Film could stoop so low makes me cry



hey man. these adverts are like tiny films. i'm emotionally involved now.


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## skyscraper101 (May 29, 2008)

The mum is quite nice, yeah I would.

The girl in the record shop is also nice and I would too.


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## Looby (May 29, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> hey man. these adverts are like tiny films. i'm emotionally involved now.



Maybe you could kidnap the ad exec, break their legs and make them write a good ending.


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

sparklefish said:


> Maybe you could kidnap the ad exec, break their legs and make them write a good ending.



if they keep going down this heartbreaking route i might have to.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 29, 2008)

Is the girl in the record shop the one that tried to chat him up at a party a couple of weeks before?


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:


> Is the girl in the record shop the one that tried to chat him up at a party a couple of weeks before?



they look alike. i'm not sure. i hope not because that has big connotations in my mind.

can anyone find out?


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## girasol (May 29, 2008)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:


> Is the girl in the record shop the one that tried to chat him up at a party a couple of weeks before?



I thought he clumsily tried to talk to her, not the other way around.

To be honest I thought it was perfectly innocent, it's normal for men to get a bit nervous around attractive women even if they have no bad intentions (I suppose the same can also be said of women)


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

Iemanja said:


> I thought he clumsily tried to talk to her, not the other way around.
> 
> To be honest I thought it was perfectly innocent, it's normal for men to get a bit nervous around attractive women even if they have no bad intentions (I suppose the same can also be said of women)



no i think she tried to talk to him and he was all bumbly and uncofortable cos he knew she was flirting and he just looked longingly over at mumsy woman.

now he's obviously having 2nd thoughts.


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## zoooo (May 29, 2008)

His wife is a lesbian.
I saw her in Queer as Folk.


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

zoooo said:


> His wife is a lesbian.
> I saw her in Queer as Folk.



what? the mum?


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## Chz (May 29, 2008)

stdPikachu said:


> To think that Art from the wonderful My Life In Film could stoop so low makes me cry



And here I was thinking that I was the only person who really enjoyed that show.


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## boing! (May 29, 2008)

I think thats my local record shop in the advert  *pointless fact*


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## stdPikachu (May 29, 2008)

Chz said:


> And here I was thinking that I was the only person who really enjoyed that show.



One of the most wryly observed and cleverly executed comedies of recent years IMHO, and all the cooler because precisely no-one watched it  The Top Gun episode is pisswateringly funny, and I haven't even seen Top Gun.


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## T & P (May 29, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> the mum or the hussy in the record shop?


 The mum.


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

boing! said:


> I think thats my local record shop in the advert  *pointless fact*



if you see that fella inthere can you have a word please


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## zoooo (May 29, 2008)

Her being a lesbian. 
(She was the nice lesbian who had the sexy gay man's baby, not the evil lesbian, who didn't like the sexy gay man.)


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## Felina (May 29, 2008)

KeyboardJockey said:


> I fancy both of them.  Just right for a suburban threesome.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Me too


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

zoooo said:


> Her being a lesbian.
> (She was the nice lesbian who had the sexy gay man's baby, not the evil lesbian, who didn't like the sexy gay man.)



oh yes i remember now! cripes i didn't make the connection.

i loved that sexy gay man.


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## zoooo (May 29, 2008)

Oh god me too. 
Stuart Jones is still the sexiest man to have ever graced my television set.


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## Vintage Paw (May 29, 2008)

zoooo said:


> Oh god me too.
> Stuart Jones is still the sexiest man to have ever graced my television set.



Get thee to The Wire

*awaits flame*


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

zoooo said:


> Oh god me too.
> Stuart Jones is still the sexiest man to have ever graced my television set.



i think he sexually awakened me to be honest. i think it was the first time i'd felt lusty towards a telly person.


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## quimcunx (May 29, 2008)

Lusting after gay men is all very well, but it's not helping our BT couple in their marital difficulties now, is it?  Try to keep to the problem at hand.


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## sojourner (May 29, 2008)

I think they should pan down to where he got his dick out and is waggling it around, then show the scene where she shuts his dick between two album covers


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## electrogirl (May 29, 2008)

Papingo said:


> Lusting after gay men is all very well, but it's not helping our BT couple in their marital difficulties now, is it?  Try to keep to the problem at hand.



you're right. we need to find out whether the man is thinking of having rumpy pumpy with record store lady.

he turned into a bit of a nob in the last advert in my opinion, all this 'ooh i'm a man i need time to myself to play wanky golf and perv on record store ladies'

maybe mumsy is better off without him. she's lovely.


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## Sabu (May 29, 2008)

Alex B said:


> In the first advert he is hit by a car, all the rest of them are figments of his imagination as he lies dying in the road.


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## stdPikachu (May 29, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> maybe mumsy is better off without him. she's lovely.



Gimme a break, she's a fucking evil bitch. Remember when she deleted that folder? She did that because she bitterly resents Kris Marshall, since he's turned into a better parent than her thanks to the godlike power of teh intrawebs as brought to you by BT. She's been indulging in self-nullifying behaviour for a while now and it's only a matter of time before she goes postal-luddite on his ass, bludgeoning her whole family to death with the BT Bone Club. No wonder he's flirting around when she's been acting like a frigid donkey in bed. She's way too neurotic for him, and he's better off without her IMHO. Anyone who doesn't agree with me is a moron who hasn't been paying attention properly.

I bet this is how _dogs_ see.


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## quimcunx (Jun 1, 2008)

I just hope they use this holiday they are going on to recapture some of the passion.  And he'll be far away from that floozy in the shop.  




Unless she booked a holiday there too!  


*wonders if ad execs as well as guardian journos use urban*


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## mentalchik (Jun 1, 2008)

internetstalker said:


> thes adverts remind me a bit of me and Mrs Stalker.
> she's older then me with kids.
> 
> *and i'm always dropping the towel in front of her*




Why am i not suprised ?


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## Scarlette (Jun 1, 2008)

This thread has made me laugh several times. Hurrah.


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## Sweaty Betty (Jun 1, 2008)

remember when he was perving over that  cute girl at the party??

the signs were already there


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## quimcunx (Jun 1, 2008)

Sweaty Betty said:


> remember when he was perving over that  cute girl at the party??
> 
> the signs were already there



I think it was her perving over him there.  She's obviously put the seeds of something in his head though.  Knowing someone is attracted to you can be a turn on in itself.


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## Sweaty Betty (Jun 1, 2008)

Papingo said:


> I think it was her perving over him there.  She's obviously put the seeds of something in his head though.  Knowing someone is attracted to you can be a turn on in itself.



Dont they both look the same???


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## electrogirl (Jul 22, 2008)

oh my god he's left her to work in cornwall and they're chatting about it over msn??!!

msn??!!

losers.

could be the beginning of the end.

i wonder if he's got that record shop hussy up there with him.


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## dodgepot (Jul 22, 2008)

(((BT couple)))

it's quite worrying. i hope it's just a blip and they can work through it and still be happy together


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## Sadken (Jul 22, 2008)

Why the fuck doesn't he just use skype?  What a tool!  She should drop that zeeee-ro and get with a heeee-ro who can use Skype properly.  Plus, Kris Marshall is blatantly too young to be tied down with her and all the kids she's got on the go.  He can only disappoin them in the long run.


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## electrogirl (Jul 22, 2008)

dodgepot said:


> (((BT couple)))
> 
> it's quite worrying. i hope it's just a blip and they can work through it and still be happy together



i hope so too, i think he's been a bit mean recently though, i hope he's not hankering after his youth and  hasn't started feeling tied down.

he's been a bit of a moron recently.


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## Belushi (Jul 22, 2008)

Sadken said:


> Plus, Kris Marshall is blatantly too young to be tied down with her and all the kids she's got on the go.



She is hot though.


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## quimcunx (Jul 22, 2008)

Sadken said:


> Why the fuck doesn't he just use skype?  What a tool!  She should drop that zeeee-ro and get with a heeee-ro who can use Skype properly.  Plus, Kris Marshall is blatantly too young to be tied down with her and all the kids she's got on the go.  He can only disappoin them in the long run.



Ageist!   


Perhaps in the next ad they'll move onto skype so they can talk dirrty to each other instead of having to type dirrty and get the keyboard all sticky.


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## Sadken (Jul 22, 2008)

Belushi said:


> She is hot though.



She is completely non-plussed by his naked penis though.  That's so humiliating!


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## CharlieAddict (Jul 22, 2008)

fuckin' good on him.
why should he tie himself down with a woman and some other man's kids?!

west country beach bunnies vs miserbale mother with a shitload of baggage.
i know what i'd go for.


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## Sadken (Jul 22, 2008)

quimcunx said:


> Ageist!



He's clearly a playa though, nothing to do with age, she doesn't need that shit with her responsibilites and all that.


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## Vintage Paw (Jul 22, 2008)

I was going to find this thread – it's like they're on a trial separation.

I didn't catch the whole ad, but it sounded like he was apologising. They looked very worried, the pair of them.

Oh dear. It's the children I feel sorry for. They've already lost one dad (who knows how?), and they've finally gone through the arduous process of accepting this new man into their lives and he goes and fucks it up.

This is way better than Gold Blend.


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## CharlieAddict (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> Oh dear. It's the children I feel sorry for. They've already lost one dad (who knows how?), and they've finally gone through the arduous process of accepting this new man into their lives and he goes and fucks it up.



'lost' but their real dad is still alive.
he was in advert number 3 or 4.

and just cos he lives with her, it don't mean he's automatically 'dad.'

i think he was taken for a ride by the whole affair.
he spent bundles on the kids.
and she's not exactly likeable.

time to move on...better fish in the sea and all that.


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## Vintage Paw (Jul 22, 2008)

I think they make a lovely couple. She's hot, you can't deny that. And even if she comes with baggage, she also comes with the 'hot older woman' thing too.

He landed on his feet, I reckon. 

She had a pretty decent house to begin with, I guess they just pooled their incomes and got a bigger, more modern place to grow into. 

Let's not forget, he's the one who has been reticent to fully commit to the relationship – doing all that flirting, and dashing her hopes re a new baby.


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## Bakunin (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> This is way better than Gold Blend.



Admit it, you luuuuuuuurved the Gold Blend ads, didn't you?

You really fancy the bloke in them who played Giles in Buffy, don't you?

Eh?

EEEEHHH?

EEEEEEHHHHH?


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## CharlieAddict (Jul 22, 2008)

is that HER house?
that is pretty impressive and i wonder how they organise/split the bills.
does he pay the utility/food bills and she sorts the mortgage?
and her ex-husband, does he pay child-support on top?

yeah he's landed on his feet alright.
she is hot and there's something pretty sophisticated about her.
but maybe he's realised that the whole instant children and wife thing is not him.

or he prefers to experience marriage and kids with someone that's not done it before...

i reckon they should end it now.
sure, she's financially sound. has a house n' all.
but does he want that? he looks like he can hold his own...it's not like he's dependent on her...he ain't no housewife or a bum.


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## Griff (Jul 22, 2008)

I hope this means he's going back to 'My Family'.


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## quimcunx (Jul 22, 2008)

Griff said:


> I hope this means he's going back to 'My Family'.



You can never go back.  If he leaves BT lady he's going to move on.  Maybe he'll take some time out, enjoy his singledom for a while - step back and consider what he really wants from a relationship, because he sure doesn't seem to know just now.


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## Epico (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> Let's not forget, he's the one who has been reticent to fully commit to the relationship – doing all that flirting, and dashing her hopes re a new baby.



I reckon it's because the children are older and can equip themselves better against his smug, slimy advances on them. As a result, he's losing interest.

She was turning a blind eye to the abuse because she doesn't want to be abandoned again like the father did previously - that, and Kris Marshall seems to spend lots of money on gadgets for the home - always popular with the women is that one.


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## kyser_soze (Jul 22, 2008)

I think the mum's a bit of a booze hound. She's always got a glass of white next to her whenever he calls or she's on screen.


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## tommers (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> dashing her hopes re a new baby.



like he had any idea that any of that was going on.  He just meant a folder.  She was the one who started going all silly bollocks about it.

Anyway.... look


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## Belushi (Jul 22, 2008)

If he dumps her I'm going to be round offering her my shoulder to cry on quicker than a rat up a drainpipe.


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## kyser_soze (Jul 22, 2008)

Belushi said:


> If he dumps her I'm going to be round offering her my shoulder to cry on quicker than a rat up a drainpipe.



I bet you'd have done the Oxo mum as well, wouldn't you? And Brenda Blethyn.


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## DotCommunist (Jul 22, 2008)

I like the way you all assume he is noncing the kids, brainwashed by tabloids, paedofinder general gif, etc.


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## Bakunin (Jul 22, 2008)

kyser_soze said:


> I bet you'd have done the Oxo mum as well, wouldn't you? And Brenda Blethyn.




If you did all three at once, do you reckon they'd cook and clean up the house afterwards?


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## 5t3IIa (Jul 22, 2008)

DotCommunist said:


> I like the way you all assume he is noncing the kids, brainwashed by tabloids, paedofinder general gif, etc.



I think the son's quite tasty, now he has hit 15 and got TALL.


I am 34


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## Belushi (Jul 22, 2008)

DotCommunist said:


> I like the way you all assume he is noncing the kids, brainwashed by tabloids, paedofinder general gif, etc.



Youre a stepdad I take it


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## kyser_soze (Jul 22, 2008)

That'd be great.

BT mum in the morning, Brenda in the afternoon, Oxo mum in the evening, then she cooks dinner...


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## quimcunx (Jul 22, 2008)

5t3IIa said:


> I think the son's quite tasty, now he has hit 15 and got TALL.
> 
> 
> I am 34



nonce.


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## 5t3IIa (Jul 22, 2008)

quimcunx said:


> nonce.


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## tommers (Jul 22, 2008)

5t3IIa said:


> I think the son's quite tasty, now he has hit 15 and got TALL.
> 
> 
> I am 34



one of my gay friends was saying the same thing.  But, unlike you, at least he had the decency to be a bit embarrassed about it.


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## Epico (Jul 22, 2008)

The follow adverts will feature:

Her, bringing a succession of increasingly edgy looking men round to the home, drinking heavily and then an eventual scag habit.

Him, discarding his BT HomeHub in a skip, living in a bedsit, wanking into a sock whilst watching reruns of Scrapheap Challenge in the dark.


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## Bakunin (Jul 22, 2008)

Epico said:


> The follow adverts will feature:
> 
> Her, bringing a succession of increasingly edgy looking men round to the home, drinking heavily and then an eventual scag habit.
> 
> Him, discarding his BT HomeHub in a skip, living in a bedsit, wanking into a sock whilst watching reruns of Scrapheap Challenge in the dark.



Have you been peering through my windows again?


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## DotCommunist (Jul 22, 2008)

hold on I just saw this picture. Thats the guilt ridden countenance of a man who's done terrible things


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## Sadken (Jul 22, 2008)

But that's my default face!


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## Kid_Eternity (Jul 22, 2008)

This has got very surreal this advert and a little bit beyond the actual product...


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## 5t3IIa (Jul 22, 2008)

tommers said:


> one of my gay friends was saying the same thing.  But, unlike you, at least he had the decency to be a bit embarrassed about it.



I am desperately googling to see if he's hit 18 yet  All I've found is this http://mcgazz.livejournal.com/143316.html with ref to 'Emo Son'

edit: hit 16, i mean


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## Vintage Paw (Jul 22, 2008)

Bakunin said:


> Admit it, you luuuuuuuurved the Gold Blend ads, didn't you?
> 
> You really fancy the bloke in them who played Giles in Buffy, don't you?
> 
> ...



I might have a little crush on Mr Head, yes. What of it?


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## Sadken (Jul 22, 2008)

That's what they call me, actually.  You know, "the ladies".


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## tommers (Jul 22, 2008)

5t3IIa said:


> I am desperately googling to see if he's hit 18 yet  All I've found is this http://mcgazz.livejournal.com/143316.html with ref to 'Emo Son'
> 
> edit: hit 16, i mean



yeah, see, you're lucky.  my mate has to wait until he hits 18.


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## Vintage Paw (Jul 22, 2008)

Sadken said:


> That's what they call me, actually.  You know, "the ladies".



Mr Head?

It's a good name to have.


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## Shippou-Sensei (Jul 22, 2008)

Sadken said:


> Why the fuck doesn't he just use skype?  What a tool!  She should drop that zeeee-ro and get with a heeee-ro who can use Skype properly.



fuck skype... use voip


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## Sadken (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> Mr Head?
> 
> It's a good name to have.



Shame they gave me the first name "shit" though, eh?  I say, eh?


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## 5t3IIa (Jul 22, 2008)

tommers said:


> yeah, see, you're lucky.  my mate has to wait until he hits 18.



Get with the times man http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/1047291.stm


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## CharlieAddict (Jul 22, 2008)

kyser_soze said:


> I think the mum's a bit of a booze hound. She's always got a glass of white next to her whenever he calls or she's on screen.



i also reckon she's a lousy drunk.
beats him. harrasses him. shags all of his best friends in front of him.
and sucks off random men in public toilets for a can of tenants extra.

another good reason why he should leave,.


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## Bakunin (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> I might have a little crush on Mr Head, yes. What of it?



Nothing, nothing.

I've always fancied Willow, myself.


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## mrsfran (Jul 22, 2008)

I've always thought he's too young to be tied down to her and her children. And she clearly treats him badly, dumping the kids on him at a moment's notice, ignoring him when he's trying to be sexay, laughing at his attempts to talk to anyone other than her. And he's made such an effort with the kids, bought them and her presents, given up his home to move in with her. He's better off out of it, I say. (((Kris)))


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## Sadken (Jul 22, 2008)

CharlieAddict said:


> i also reckon she's a lousy drunk.
> beats him. harrasses him. shags all of his best friends in front of him.
> and sucks off random in public toilets for a can of tenants extra.
> 
> another good reason why he should leave,.



....but what a ride...


----------



## CharlieAddict (Jul 22, 2008)

missfran said:


> I've always thought he's too young to be tied down to her and her children. And she clearly treats him badly, dumping the kids on him at a moment's notice, ignoring him when he's trying to be sexay, laughing at his attempts to talk to anyone other than her. And he's made such an effort with the kids, bought them and her presents, given up his home to move in with her. He's better off out of it, I say. (((Kris)))



well said miss fran!!!


----------



## DotCommunist (Jul 22, 2008)

missfran said:


> I've always thought he's too young to be tied down to her and her children. And she clearly treats him badly, dumping the kids on him at a moment's notice, ignoring him when he's trying to be sexay, laughing at his attempts to talk to anyone other than her. And he's made such an effort with the kids, bought them and her presents, given up his home to move in with her. He's better off out of it, I say. (((Kris)))



hurrah! someone who doesn't immediately cry nonce at poor Kris


----------



## kyser_soze (Jul 22, 2008)

CharlieAddict said:


> i also reckon she's a lousy drunk.
> beats him. harrasses him. shags all of his best friends in front of him.
> and sucks off random men in public toilets for a can of tenants extra.
> 
> another good reason why he should leave,.



I reckon she gives him shit on toast. For breakfast, lunch and supper.


----------



## Vintage Paw (Jul 22, 2008)

I don't think he's a nonce.

However, he knew what he was getting into when he bought the new house with her. Remember back when he visited her old house for the first time – the debacle with the toys? He was feeling his way, working out whether he could cope with the insta-family, and he chose yes.

You don't just mess with a whole family's feelings like that. He put thought into it, and he made the choice, not her.


----------



## electrogirl (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> I don't think he's a nonce.
> 
> However, he knew what he was getting into when he bought the new house with her. Remember back when he visited her old house for the first time – the debacle with the toys? He was feeling his way, working out whether he could cope with the insta-family, and he chose yes.
> 
> You don't just mess with a whole family's feelings like that. He put thought into it, and he made the choice, not her.



exactly, at no point in this relationship did she force him into anything, he was happy to do it, he ingragiated himself into this ready made family because it made him feel good, maybe it made him feel like a hero, and now things have got tough and he's looking to go back to his single ways.

well he can't do that, it's selfish and irresponsible. he made a commitment, he needs to stick to it, or at lease face the problems, not run away.


----------



## Vintage Paw (Jul 22, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> exactly, at no point in this relationship did she force him into anything, he was happy to do it, he ingragiated himself into this ready made family because it made him feel good, maybe it made him feel like a hero, and now things have got tough and he's looking to go back to his single ways.
> 
> well he can't do that, it's selfish and irresponsible. he made a commitment, he needs to stick to it, or at lease face the problems, not run away.



Yep, absolutely.

It's a sad indictment of our instant gratification society that he isn't prepared to work at his relationship when things aren't as new and exciting as they were when he first met her.


----------



## CharlieAddict (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> You don't just mess with a whole family's feelings like that. He put thought into it, and he made the choice, not her.



oh c'mon, everyone makes mistakes.
no-one is perfect.
he fucked up. he knows that.
how on earth was he too know that the woman he loved turned out to be a crazy boozer that sucked strangers off in public toilets? who shat on his toast, breakfast, lunch and dinner? who ignored his advances when he flashed his bits? who takes him for granted and without warning gives HIM all of the children responsibilites?

cornwall is is exit to all his troubles.
i hope he gets with that chick in the record shop also.


----------



## mrsfran (Jul 22, 2008)

electrogirl said:


> exactly, at no point in this relationship did she force him into anything, he was happy to do it, he ingragiated himself into this ready made family because it made him feel good, maybe it made him feel like a hero, and now things have got tough and he's looking to go back to his single ways.
> 
> well he can't do that, it's selfish and irresponsible. he made a commitment, he needs to stick to it, or at lease face the problems, not run away.


 
He needs some time out to think about it. He's been swept along and while, yes, it was his decision to take on the family, he had no idea what was involved. He loved her, he wanted to be with her, and she expected him to know everything there was about being a parent instantly. Where was her support during this major change in his lifestyle? After all, what's she sacrificed or given up? Nothing. He's the one who's made all the changes.

And now that he's got something for himself, his _dream_ job, she's giving him ultimatums, demanding that he come back to her instead of supporting him in his dreams. Where's the love from her, eh? _Where's the love from her?_


----------



## electrogirl (Jul 22, 2008)

missfran said:


> He needs some time out to think about it. He's been swept along and while, yes, it was his decision to take on the family, he had no idea what was involved. He loved her, he wanted to be with her, and she expected him to know everything there was about being a parent instantly. Where was her support during this major change in his lifestyle? After all, what's she sacrificed or given up? Nothing. He's the one who's made all the changes.
> 
> And now that he's got something for himself, his _dream_ job, she's giving him ultimatums, demanding that he come back to her instead of supporting him in his dreams. Where's the love from her, eh? _Where's the love from her?_



you've made some valid points. i jsut feel that he's been edging away from her slowly, without talkng to her about he feels. how is she supposed to knwo he's feeling this way? she's not a mind reader.

he wanted to make these changes, he knew what a big deal it was for her and the children, and now they've lost another dad, does he realise what that means to them? how that will affect them? no, he's too busy in cornwall with his 'dream job'.

maybe he entered this situation too eagerly, maybe he thought he liked the dad role for a while but then the shine started to fade, but that's not her fault, and it's certainly not the kids fault.


----------



## mrsfran (Jul 22, 2008)

It's true, they do need to talk. He's trying, he's just afflicted with bad broadband. That's not his fault. And since when has she been open with her feelings, either? She was clearly upset when he misunderstood her about having children, but she didn't say a word. She's let the resentment build up, and occasionally letting it seep out passively-aggressively, ignoring his advances, mocking him in front of other people, refusing to support him in persuing his dreams.

But sure, we could continue to apportion blame, but where is that getting us? They need to move forward - either together or apart. I'm sure they love each other, but they both need to be reasonable. He's in Devon, it's the school holidays, perhaps she and the kids could stay with him there for a while.


----------



## tommers (Jul 22, 2008)

missfran said:


> He's trying, he's just afflicted with bad broadband. That's not his fault.



NOT HIS FAULT?!?!?!  NOT HIS FAULT?!!?!

HE WORKS FOR FUCKING BT!!!!!!  I reckon he chose a bad broadband provider in order to give him an excuse to go down the lapdancing club.

He's a player.

Dream job?  Probably doesn't even exist.


----------



## tommers (Jul 22, 2008)

5t3IIa said:


> Get with the times man http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/1047291.stm





I am such a tool.


----------



## girasol (Jul 22, 2008)

hehe, I love this thread.  I nearly had a heart attack when I saw the last advert.

What the fuck could be happening, I wondered?  To be honest I stop wondering after 2 seconds, but thanks to this thread I now have many possible answers


----------



## Balbi (Jul 22, 2008)

after a few minutes reading, i have concluded

EPIC THREAD IS EPIC


----------



## electrogirl (Jul 22, 2008)

missfran said:


> It's true, they do need to talk. He's trying, he's just afflicted with bad broadband. That's not his fault. And since when has she been open with her feelings, either? She was clearly upset when he misunderstood her about having children, but she didn't say a word. She's let the resentment build up, and occasionally letting it seep out passively-aggressively, ignoring his advances, mocking him in front of other people, refusing to support him in persuing his dreams.
> 
> But sure, we could continue to apportion blame, but where is that getting us? They need to move forward - either together or apart. I'm sure they love each other, but they both need to be reasonable. He's in Devon, it's the school holidays, perhaps she and the kids could stay with him there for a while.



look i think there's fault on both sides, placing blame isn't going to help the situation at all. they need to communicate properly, all this msn or skyping or whatever they're doing at the moment isn't going to help things, it's so easy to misintepret the tones of writing, they need to sit down and discuss what they need out of this relationship.

maybe she needs to give him a little more space, but i think he's had space enough, playing golf, eyeing up women in record shops, she let's him do these things because she realises his needs as a younger man, but still this wasn't enough for him. he saw this cornwall job as a way out maybe, and that is running away in my book, it sounds like they didn't get to talk it through properly, maybe there was too much emotion on both sides.

i hope they can work it out but they both need to adapt and change.


----------



## ATOMIC SUPLEX (Jul 22, 2008)

I think he should just leave it at the bust connection. Shes gone all a bit moany and he was well in with the girl at the party and the record shop lady.


----------



## Bakunin (Jul 22, 2008)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:


> I think he should just leave it at the bust connection. Shes gone all a bit moany and he was well in with the girl at the party and the record shop lady.




I'm not sure if they'd allow us to watch an advert involving him, the party girl and the record shop lady.

It'd have to be on after the watershed if they did.


----------



## kyser_soze (Jul 22, 2008)

I've decided, very late in the thread, that electrogirl's *thing* with firky has broken her grammer, _viz_ *Is that couple OK?*...

I think mumsy lady stopped the tap on older lady lovin', or failed to deliver on the 'more experience=dirtier' promise that she dangled in front of him when they started...


----------



## Biglittlefish (Jul 22, 2008)

I sincerely hope their relationship breaks where upon he has to call (on his mobile) the only people with the power to fix it, who happen to be in a call centre in India and can't make head nor talk of his accent. After a month of trying they will eventually tell him he must pay all the bills for the relationship which has not worked in a month at which point he will angrily destroy her, switch to men and hate all woman he comes into contact with from then on. 
Just like in real life.


----------



## CharlieAddict (Jul 22, 2008)

Biglittlefish said:


> I sincerely hope their relationship breaks where upon he has to call (on his mobile) the only people with the power to fix it, who happen to be in a call centre in India and can't make head nor talk of his accent. After a month of trying they will eventually tell him he must pay all the bills for the relationship which has not worked in a month at which point he will angrily destroy her, switch to men and hate all woman he comes into contact with from then on.



that would make a great WKD ad.


----------



## Looby (Jul 22, 2008)

Vintage Paw said:


> I might have a little crush on Mr Head, yes. What of it?



Ooh, me too. 

I knew this thread would have been bumped.
The new ad is slightly upsetting.  I don't want them to split up.


----------



## mysterygirl (Jul 22, 2008)

sparklefish said:


> The new ad is slightly upsetting.  I don't want them to split up.



Me either.  Wouldn't it be nice, just for once, to see a relationship go well, despite some ups & downs?  It's easier (and more interesting) to write about things going well, I suppose.  No-one's up for a challenge anymore - not the BT couple to make their relationship work, nor the writers of the ad-series.


----------



## electrogirl (Jul 22, 2008)

kyser_soze said:


> I've decided, very late in the thread, that electrogirl's *thing* with firky has broken her grammer, _viz_ *Is that couple OK?*...
> 
> .





i would like all past, present and future mistakes blamed on firky please.


----------



## girasol (Jul 22, 2008)

mysterygirl said:


> Me either.  Wouldn't it be nice, just for once, to see a relationship go well, despite some ups & downs?  It's easier (and more interesting) to write about things going well, I suppose.  No-one's up for a challenge anymore - not the BT couple to make their relationship work, nor the writers of the ad-series.



Of course they won't split up!  They're just going through a rough patch! Calm down people, they'll make it through somehow and emerge stronger, and probably pregnant!!!!


----------



## mysterygirl (Jul 22, 2008)

Pregnant!! How exciting!!


----------



## girasol (Jul 22, 2008)

mysterygirl said:


> Pregnant!! How exciting!!



I know!   A pregnant man, who'd have though!!!!


by aliens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## mysterygirl (Jul 22, 2008)

Iemanja said:


> I know!   A pregnant man, who'd have though!!!!
> 
> 
> by aliens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




  You don't think that maybe, _perhaps _, you're getting the tiniest littlest bit carried away?? 





Think of all the phone calls & folders & ...................... _stuff _a baby would generate for BT!!!!


----------



## stdPikachu (Jul 23, 2008)

Iemanja said:


> I know!   A pregnant man, who'd have though!!!!
> 
> 
> by aliens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Not even the alien anal probe will leave you feeling like you've just been reamed like BT's shitty products and services do. Go with BT for the best rectal discomfort money can buy!


----------



## electrogirl (Jul 23, 2008)

i still don't get why they are on msn or whatever talking about their troubled relationship, it's only cornwall, not africa.

maybe it's still too raw to talk on the phone about..........


----------



## CharlieAddict (Jul 23, 2008)

maybe he's got oral herpes from the stripper he ate the other night....


----------



## skyscraper101 (Jul 23, 2008)

I can see it now...

"Introducing the  'BT ANAL PROBE' with WIFI connection and even greater range than before. Hook it up to BT VISION for the full on probing experience in HD.

Subject to terms and conditions, 12 month contract and BT line rental


----------



## Bakunin (Jul 23, 2008)

skyscraper101 said:


> I can see it now...
> 
> "Introducing the  'BT ANAL PROBE' with WIFI connection and even greater range than before. Hook it up to BT VISION for the full on probing experience in HD.
> 
> Subject to terms and conditions, 12 month contract and BT line rental



Apparently, if you ram it up far enough you can clean your teeth while still esperiencing the ultimate in plastic pleasure.


----------



## ethel (Jul 28, 2008)

you've all made me seek out the latest ads online!


----------



## Ranbay (Jul 29, 2008)




----------



## Ranbay (Oct 15, 2008)

Seen the new one?

right so he goes over to his mates for beers and food and shit, slates his TV service then goes home to watch fucking BEE movie...  no mention of the bird or anything, but he's in the flat near the cost where he cant use his wirless and stuf... why not pick up the phone and call her?

CUNT


----------



## Epico (Oct 15, 2008)

It's finished. Finito. Get over it.

He's back to shared houses and eating Frosties from the packet at four in the afternoon, the child grooming mo'fo.


----------



## quimcunx (Oct 15, 2008)

B0B2oo9 said:


> Seen the new one?
> 
> right so he goes over to his mates for beers and food and shit, slates his TV service then goes home to watch fucking BEE movie...  no mention of the bird or anything, but he's in the flat near the cost where he cant use his wirless and stuf... why not pick up the phone and call her?
> 
> CUNT



She should shop him!  Guess her kids got too old to nonce on.


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 15, 2008)

he's done it!!
he's dumped the nagging old slag and her bastard children.

and is free!

he must get a hobby though.
beer, footie and tv is rather boring.


----------



## quimcunx (Oct 15, 2008)

CharlieAddict said:


> he's done it!!
> he's dumped the nagging old slag and her bastard children.
> 
> and is free!
> ...




Link?


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 15, 2008)

Wanking off to BEE MOVIE is not the way forward.


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 15, 2008)

quimcunx said:


> Link?



i'm at work - no youtube sorry.

but saw it on the telly...sunday i think.
he's also grown his hair out.

whatever he does, he must not ring her or answer her calls.
hope he can do it.


----------



## Bakunin (Oct 15, 2008)

CharlieAddict said:


> i'm at work - no youtube sorry.
> 
> but saw it on the telly...sunday i think.
> he's also grown his hair out.
> ...




Fear not, it'll not be long before she's found somone else and he gets his hooks into another delectable MILF.


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 15, 2008)

or her kids...


----------



## Bakunin (Oct 15, 2008)

B0B2oo9 said:


> or her kids...



Does this mean that everyone's favourite television MILF is now available?

Hoorah!


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 15, 2008)

B0B2oo9 said:


> or her kids...



if he waits a couple of years and takes the youngest to spain, i think he can legally go out with her.


----------



## Epico (Oct 15, 2008)

Bakunin said:


> Does this mean that everyone's favourite television MILF is now available?
> 
> Hoorah!



Tell us when the new adverts air. 

What product will you try to flog?

Will you bond with the kids?


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 15, 2008)

CharlieAddict said:


> if he waits a couple of years and takes the youngest to spain, i think he can legally go out with her.



you knowledge of the system is awesome


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 15, 2008)

B0B2oo9 said:


> you knowledge of the system is awesome



thank you.

that BT guy is my hero. 
GLITTER POWER!


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 15, 2008)

and girl power.


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 15, 2008)

W00t!!

Anyway, i have seen Bee movie and it was shit.


----------



## Augie March (Oct 15, 2008)

I feel for his mate. In he comes sits down starts berating all the channels he's got. "This is shit, this is shit, this is shit." He says. Telling him he what he should be watching and what he shouldn't be watching.

His mate should just turn around and say "Look you smug git, fuck off back to your wife or Robert Lindsay or whoever it is at the moment. You've been sleeping in my living room for three weeks now and it's pissing me off. Go away. I don't even like you."


----------



## girasol (Oct 15, 2008)

He'll soon start drinking heavily and thinking about the pointlessness of life.

Then maybe he'll start seeing a young student from the uni down the road and start going to raves and end up addicted to crack.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 15, 2008)

I reckon they are going to do an add with him having a wank over some net porn sooner or later.

dave


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 15, 2008)

He's not living with his mate tho,,, he was just visiting... the last shot he is home in his pants watching Bee Movie, and blue petter or something... i guess..


----------



## moonsi til (Oct 15, 2008)

I haven't seen the new advert but I reckon from the previous one that it would be her that finished the relationship. I think I last heard her ask 'Adam did you really think it was going to be OK?'...then the connection broke.

Also even though I have not seen the new Ad I reckon they will get married.


----------



## Epico (Oct 15, 2008)

Iemanja said:


> Then maybe he'll start seeing a young student from the uni down the road and start going to raves and end up addicted to crack.



I hate it when that happens.


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 15, 2008)

Epico said:


> I hate it when that happens.



i hate it when they come out from the other side and become born-again christians


----------



## tommers (Oct 16, 2008)

BT asked me if I wanted a credit card off them the other day...  so he'll probably be buying her flowers off the internet with it in the next one.


----------



## electrogirl (Oct 16, 2008)

right what the fuck is going on? this new advert is like a mystery. there are clues but it could be misleading.

okay so he's hanging out with his single mates now, is he going back to his batchelor life? clawing back the friends he inevitably lost when he shacked up with milf?

but then he kind of scoffs at this lifestlye and smugs off down the road into his smugpad. looking smug obvs.

so NO sign of milf or fiddledkids still, worrying....but then, when he turns on the tellybox there are girlie things, lost, the other boleyn girl etc...is he a scarlett johansson fan? or is milf still around being girlie and riding bikes with flowers in?

or. and this is the worst option. is this record shop bitch's sky+ material????


this is the most confusing one of all imo.


----------



## electrogirl (Oct 16, 2008)

oh hang on bee movie is a kids film?

i thought he meant B movie! 

bee movie is more reassuring.


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 16, 2008)

he;s a bore or a weirdo.
why would an adult male be watching a kid's film?

he should get into arthouse flicks...


----------



## Epico (Oct 17, 2008)

CharlieAddict said:


> why would an adult male be watching a kid's film?



It might remind him of fiddledkids. 



electrogirl said:


> or. and this is the worst option. is this record shop bitch's sky+ material????



Don't diss' 'record shop bitch', don't bring her into this - she's a symptom not a cause.


----------



## electrogirl (Oct 17, 2008)

Epico said:


> Don't diss' 'record shop bitch', don't bring her into this - she's a symptom not a cause.



i'm sorry, i knwo it's not her fault. my heart overruled my head to be honest.

i'm just a bit hurt, and scared, you know?


----------



## quimcunx (Oct 17, 2008)

CharlieAddict said:


> he;s a bore or a weirdo.
> why would an adult male be watching a kid's film?
> 
> he should get into arthouse flicks...



something to talk to the kids about isn't it.  Arthouse flicks ain't gonna get you anywhere.


----------



## electrogirl (Oct 17, 2008)

quimcunx said:


> something to talk to the kids about isn't it.  Arthouse flicks ain't gonna get you anywhere.



what, like revision? like, oh i can't come out tonight i'm watching wall-e so that i have something to talk to the kids about?

fucking losser.


----------



## CharlieAddict (Oct 17, 2008)

quimcunx said:


> something to talk to the kids about isn't it.  Arthouse flicks ain't gonna get you anywhere.



but he has no kids!

or do you mean like a chat up line to a 5 year old?

what a fuckin' scumbag.


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 17, 2008)

yeah like that guy in the film Hard Candy, he invited the girl over to listen to a CD of gig he said he went to or something...


----------



## mysterygirl (Oct 17, 2008)

Where's she gone, the GF?  Is she an ex GF now?  Is it all over or is it still classed as a rough patch?  Is he still in Cornwall?  

So many questions.  I think I need to watch more TV. Or at least more ads.


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 17, 2008)

yeah he's in the same pad on the coast, he's had BT installed now, so he must be fucking minted.

but on the same note he must have super Wifi and shit so they could still cyber and that.


----------



## Zachor (Oct 17, 2008)

mysterygirl said:


> Where's she gone, the GF?  Is she an ex GF now?  Is it all over or is it still classed as a rough patch?  Is he still in Cornwall?
> 
> So many questions.  I think I need to watch more TV. Or at least more ads.



Maybe she's tackled him on his flirtyness and they've had a long deep conversation and agreed to be polyamorous.  If so can I be first in the cue for a threesome with them.  




<I am a slut >


----------



## electrogirl (Oct 17, 2008)

mysterygirl said:


> Where's she gone, the GF?  Is she an ex GF now?  Is it all over or is it still classed as a rough patch?  Is he still in Cornwall?
> 
> So many questions.  I think I need to watch more TV. Or at least more ads.



sometimes i wish i could sky+ adverts and miss out all the shitty documentaries and telly progs and stuff.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 17, 2008)

Im shocked there isn't a channel dedicated to adverts to be honest.

glad, but shocked.


dave


----------



## T & P (Oct 17, 2008)

kained&able said:


> Im shocked there isn't a channel dedicated to adverts to be honest.
> 
> glad, but shocked.
> 
> ...


 Most of the special interest channels (travel, health, history etc) become de facto ad channels during the night. And not just normal 20 second slots, but those godawful 30-minute specials that even have audiences.


----------



## Ranbay (Oct 17, 2008)

I was thinking about running a advert Channel the other day, i bet people would watch it. stoners and the like.


----------



## tommers (Oct 17, 2008)

B0B2oo9 said:


> I was thinking about running a advert Channel the other day, i bet people would watch it. stoners and the like.



stoners will watch anything.  for ages.


----------



## Ranbay (Nov 5, 2008)

> BRITAIN recoiled in horror last night as the BT broadband couple took their first tentative steps towards reconciliation.
> 
> Amid falling house prices, the looming recession and the trauma of Andrew Sachs's Penis-Gate, the country has gained some measure of comfort from the knowledge that the mind-numbingly tedious relationship seemed to have been destroyed for good.
> 
> ...




www.thedailymash.co.uk


----------



## Oriole (Nov 5, 2008)

She's had her hair cut short, surely that means it's over and she has moved on?


----------



## newme (Nov 5, 2008)

B0B2oo9 said:


> www.thedailymash.co.uk



Damnit _I_ came here to post that


----------



## quimcunx (Nov 5, 2008)

Oriole said:


> She's had her hair cut short, surely that means it's over and she has moved on?



It might just be tied back.  She's been through the wars.  You can't blame her if she hasn't paid as much attention to her grooming as she might.  It's not like he's there to see her, is it?


----------



## Inspected (Nov 5, 2008)

Do you think they will introduce a black or mixed-race character now it's all the rage en all?


----------



## Melinda (Nov 5, 2008)

Inspected said:


> Do you think they will introduce a black or mixed-race character now it's all the rage en all?


----------



## machine cat (Nov 6, 2008)

poor couple


----------



## electrogirl (Nov 6, 2008)

I imagine that bowlhead haircut was her attempting a Gwyneth Paltrow Sliding Doors post-break up makeover.

It looks terriblez though.

She seemed eggy when she finally answered the phone.


----------



## silver (Nov 7, 2008)

I hate her, I hate her, I hate her, she needs killing in the face, she makes me want to throw things at the tv, if I were him I'd bloody run off with the girl from the record shop, she makes me angry


----------



## Relahni (Nov 7, 2008)

I'd like an advert where the bloke's broadband connection gets cut off and he phones up BT and gets passed around 10 different Departments and speaks to 10 people with rocks for brains..


----------



## Ride (Nov 7, 2008)

B0B2oo9 said:


> I was thinking about running a advert Channel the other day, i bet people would watch it. stoners and the like.



There was one. Unsurprisingly, it tanked. 
It was a terrible idea.  

Back to the BT adverts, if this thread is any indication of how they've been received then I can't decide if they're been successful or not.. You're all talking about the couple and not the product


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## Stigmata (Nov 7, 2008)

Inspected said:


> Do you think they will introduce a black or mixed-race character now it's all the rage en all?



There was that preposterously good-looking lass who took a shine to whatshisname, until he weirded her out by talking about his 'home hub'.


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## g force (Nov 7, 2008)

Relahni said:


> I'd like an advert where the bloke's broadband connection gets cut off and he phones up BT and gets passed around 10 different Departments and speaks to 10 people with rocks for brains..



Please...this is not reality TV!!!!


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## quimcunx (Nov 7, 2008)

Relahni said:


> I'd like an advert where the bloke's broadband connection gets cut off and he phones up BT and gets passed around 10 different Departments and speaks to 10 people with rocks for brains..



 


Silly. You've got to get through 12 levels of menu options before being offered a human to talk to. 

 

Anway, derail, etc.


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## Melinda (Nov 7, 2008)

Stigmata said:


> There was that preposterously good-looking lass who took a shine to whatshisname, until he weirded her out by talking about his 'home hub'.


I rather suspect _Inspected_ isnt genuinely interested in 'black or mixed-race characters' at all.


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## dlx1 (Nov 7, 2008)

She cut her hair does look as look now. 

they need yo think about the kids


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## electrogirl (Nov 7, 2008)

her new haircut makes her looklike a little boy.


and now adam's suddenly interested again...


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## T & P (Nov 7, 2008)

Does the ad agency behind this campaign actually think people care for the characters and are concerned about the outcome of their relationship? 

I guess they do; otherwise they wouldn't produce them in the first place.

It might have worked with the Oxo family ads all those years ago (if it did at all). It doesn't now.


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## electrogirl (Nov 8, 2008)

T & P said:


> Does the ad agency behind this campaign actually think people care for the characters and are concerned about the outcome of their relationship?
> 
> I guess they do; otherwise they wouldn't produce them in the first place.
> 
> It might have worked with the Oxo family ads all those years ago (if it did at all). It doesn't now.



I CARE


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## quimcunx (Nov 8, 2008)

T & P said:


> Does the ad agency behind this campaign actually think people care for the characters and are concerned about the outcome of their relationship?
> 
> I guess they do; otherwise they wouldn't produce them in the first place.
> 
> It might have worked with the Oxo family ads all those years ago (if it did at all). It doesn't now.




Yes.  There is a whole thread about it on Urban!   Oh wait a minute.....


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## T & P (Nov 8, 2008)

quimcunx said:


> Yes.  There is a whole thread about it on Urban!   Oh wait a minute.....


 While the campaign might have been succeeded in getting us to talk about it, I don't subscribe to the 'all publicity is good publicity' mantra. You will have noticed that virtually every post has been mocking the campaign and taking the piss out of it- and I doubt a single person who's read or contributed would be more inclined to buy the BT products advertised because of it.

Come to think of it, I don't even remember what products they're pushing. All I ever think of the ads when I watch them is how silly they are, and how agreeable on the eye the woman is.


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## strung out (Nov 8, 2008)

its more about product awareness as opposed to actually making you want to buy something each time you see the advert


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## electrogirl (Jan 18, 2009)

oh wow, he just told jane 'the answer is yes'.

wtf does this mean?


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## zoooo (Jan 18, 2009)

He has tested positive for herpes?


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## electrogirl (Jan 18, 2009)

zoooo said:


> He has tested positive for herpes?



Zoooo.


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## zoooo (Jan 18, 2009)

Sowwy.

I don't know, hopefully she has asked him to move back in.


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## Sweaty Betty (Jan 18, 2009)

Nah she is up to no good you can tell by her blase attitude- he will get hurt again mark my words


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## electrogirl (Jan 18, 2009)

Sweaty Betty said:


> Nah she is up to no good you can tell by her blase attitude- he will get hurt again mark my words



Her?! What?! He has been acting like a dick, dicking around and watching kid's films like a big dick.


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## Sweaty Betty (Jan 18, 2009)

:





electrogirl said:


> Her?! What?! He has been acting like a dick, dicking around and watching kid's films like a big dick.



She wouldnt put out FFS


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## electrogirl (Jan 18, 2009)

Sweaty Betty said:


> :
> 
> She wouldnt put out FFS





He's being a right twat in this new one aswell. 'OOOH A letter from Jane' all blase, then he deals with his fucking quotes before reading it, then when he rings her he sounds all nonplussed.


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## strung out (Jan 18, 2009)

sometimes i feel like my life is like a BT advert


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## goldenecitrone (Jan 18, 2009)

strung_out said:


> sometimes i feel like my life is like a BT advert



Short, banal and totally pointless? You should get with Orange. I am all the people who have ever cut my hair, picked up my litter or cooked my lunch.


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## bigbry (Jan 19, 2009)

kyser_soze said:


> I bet you'd have done the Oxo mum as well, wouldn't you? *And Brenda Blethyn*.



Now you have reawakened 'old' stirrings in my loins. Ummm, Brenda Blethyn.


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## Augie March (Apr 14, 2009)

I think he's starting to lose the plot in the ad I just saw. He can't sleep because he's worrying about losing his internet connection. 

He's starting to remind me a bit now of Jon in a Garfield minus Garfield comic.


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## electrogirl (Apr 14, 2009)

Augie March said:


> I think he's starting to lose the plot in the ad I just saw. He can't sleep because he's worrying about losing his internet connection.
> 
> _*He's starting to remind me a bit now of Jon in a Garfield minus Garfield comic.*_


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## electrogirl (Apr 14, 2009)

I think she's definitely left him for good.


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## strung out (Apr 14, 2009)

oh those garfield minus garfield comics are ace


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## kabbes (Apr 15, 2009)

He's left his laptop on all night without even switching the screen off


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## DotCommunist (Apr 15, 2009)

kabbes said:


> He's left his laptop on all night without even switching the screen off



they go into hibernation mode on there own you know.

You're one of those anal types who has to switch everything off before bed aren't you?


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## moonsi til (Apr 15, 2009)

electrogirl said:


> I think she's definitely left him for good.



I don't think so. In the latest ad he wakes up worrying about flights for a weekend away...I reckon it's his stag do!


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## kabbes (Apr 15, 2009)

DotCommunist said:


> they go into hibernation mode on there own you know.


Yeah but his hadn't _despite him having been asleep all night_.  Shows that he's turned his hibernation off.  Cunt.



> You're one of those anal types who has to switch everything off before bed aren't you?


I don't like to waste our precious resources, my precious.


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## The Octagon (Apr 15, 2009)

moonsi til said:


> I don't think so. In the latest ad he wakes up worrying about flights for a weekend away...I reckon it's his stag do!



Nah, I saw that this morning, I think he's meant to be taking her on a make-or-break trip (to Rome?).



Augie March said:


> He's starting to remind me a bit now of Jon in a Garfield minus Garfield comic.


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## T & P (May 7, 2009)

I am immensely happy to see they're not only back together but apparently engaged. Trebles all around!


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## quimcunx (May 7, 2009)

T & P said:


> I am immensely happy to see they're not only back together but apparently engaged. Trebles all around!



Oh!  That _is_ good news.  Have you seen the ring? What's it like? I haven't seen the ad.  Who proposed? How'd they do it?  c'mon, I want the skinny!


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## electrogirl (May 7, 2009)

ooooooooo that's BRILLIANT! 

I knew they'd work it out.

Maybe he was organising a stag do.


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## 100% masahiko (May 7, 2009)

That's terrible news. He's bottled it and have to make do with an old woman and her horrible children.


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## Zachor (May 7, 2009)

quimcunx said:


> Oh!  That _is_ good news.  Have you seen the ring? What's it like? I haven't seen the ad.  Who proposed? How'd they do it?  c'mon, I want the skinny!



Aggh! I must have missed some of the ads.  I want to know more.


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## Badgers (May 7, 2009)

Is it still going?


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## mrsfran (May 7, 2009)

They went on a "make or break holiday" and it appears to have made them. We haven't seen the ring yet. She proposed via letter, he said yes via phone. They are now phoning round all their friends and telling them.

Personally, I think they ought to discuss what they want out of life a bit more first. He pursued his dream job, she was upset with him for it. Is she always going to do that? Is she going to hold him back? What about kids? She clearly wants more, he doesn't seem to have given the matter much thought. Is he still flirting with strangers at parties? These are all things they need to consider before they make such a big commitment.


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## Melinda (May 7, 2009)

Badgers said:


> Is it still going?



Yeah,  looks like she has forgiven him for grooming the kids, and for the incident in the bathroom and the glass jar that time.


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## Badgers (May 7, 2009)

Melinda said:


> Yeah,  looks like she has forgiven him for grooming the kids, and for the incident in the bathroom and the glass jar that time.





It is odd not watching adverts and I don't miss 95% of them but this 'soap opera' did interest me


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## 100% masahiko (May 7, 2009)

Melinda said:


> Yeah,  looks like she has forgiven him for grooming the kids, and for the incident in the bathroom and the glass jar that time.



Lol! I forgot about that!


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## girasol (May 7, 2009)

I missed this thread, it's one of my favourites


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## joustmaster (May 8, 2009)

electrogirl said:


> I think she's definitely left him for good.





electrogirl said:


> ooooooooo that's BRILLIANT!
> 
> I knew they'd work it out.
> 
> Maybe he was organising a stag do.


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## 100% masahiko (May 8, 2009)

Maybe he rang his family/friends to tell them that she was killed in a car accident.


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## tar1984 (May 8, 2009)

I don't get how he freaks out about losing his wireless connection all the time, when he could just pick up the phone instead.  It would be more personal too.


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## joustmaster (May 8, 2009)

tar1984 said:


> I don't get how he freaks out about losing his wireless connection all the time, when he could just pick up the phone instead.  It would be more personal too.


yes, its good to talk.


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## tar1984 (May 8, 2009)

joustmaster said:


> yes, its good to talk.



Well exactly!


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## madamv (May 8, 2009)

missfran said:


> They went on a "make or break holiday" and it appears to have made them. We haven't seen the ring yet. She proposed via letter, he said yes via phone. They are now phoning round all their friends and telling them.
> 
> Personally, I think they ought to discuss what they want out of life a bit more first. He pursued his dream job, she was upset with him for it. Is she always going to do that? Is she going to hold him back? What about kids? She clearly wants more, he doesn't seem to have given the matter much thought. Is he still flirting with strangers at parties? These are all things they need to consider before they make such a big commitment.


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## electrogirl (May 8, 2009)

missfran said:


> They went on a "make or break holiday" and it appears to have made them. We haven't seen the ring yet. She proposed via letter, he said yes via phone. They are now phoning round all their friends and telling them.
> 
> Personally, I think they ought to discuss what they want out of life a bit more first. He pursued his dream job, she was upset with him for it. Is she always going to do that? Is she going to hold him back? What about kids? She clearly wants more, he doesn't seem to have given the matter much thought. Is he still flirting with strangers at parties? These are all things they need to consider before they make such a big commitment.



I agree with much of this. I hope that the excitement of getting back together and getting engaged hasn't masked or made them forget what the issues that forced them apart were. I hope they've discussed their priorities because I think, essentially, that's where the problem lies for them. Maybe he's realised that he wants the whole family thing now, and got bored of of the batchelor lifestyle...but he got bored of the family life too. He seems flighty, I hope this won't cause trouble in the future.

Also, what happened to RECORD STORE WHORE?!


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## quimcunx (May 8, 2009)

electrogirl said:


> Also, what happened to RECORD STORE WHORE?!



That little homebreaker can do one as far as I'm concerned. 


They need to sit down and talk face to face, frankly, frankly.  

BT probably won't show that bit though.


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## kained&able (May 8, 2009)

electrogirl said:


> Also, what happened to RECORD STORE WHORE?!



she will be the stripper for the stag night.


dave


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## bouncer_the_dog (May 8, 2009)

Maybe he hacked her email and discovered she is a secret millionairess with a terminal disease - and he stands to inherit the lot... if only she'd hurry up and die.


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## camouflage (May 8, 2009)

"Sometimes you seem to think everythings just going to carry on the same"
"Well, won't it?"
"you tell me..."


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## magneze (May 8, 2009)

She proposed via letter? Has BT teamed up with Royal Mail?


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## PandaCola (Jun 26, 2010)

Worst stag night ever- going from flat to flat watching hardcore porn on laptops. From the reaction of him and his weird mates, I can only assume they are watching beastiality, kiddie porn or shit swallowing. Is this really the kind of thing BT want to encourage? Hopefully, the sinister ex-husband will find out and lock the groom up in an underground torture chamber to keep him away from oversensitive daughter.


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## mrsfran (Jun 26, 2010)

Every time I see the one where the daughter gets upset because her dad keeps cutting her off while on his mobile, I hope the mum replies with "it's because daddy doesn't love you, darling".


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## DexterTCN (Jun 26, 2010)

Let's never forget that years ago when we were all on dial-up - heavy users of the BT service were given a new phone number to use *that didn't work* but they kept charging you for the service.   Eventually prosecuted iirc but I never got a refund and don't know anyone else who did.

Fuck BT...and fuck their adverts of implied guilt if you don't use a land-line.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (Jun 26, 2010)

electrogirl said:


> I agree with much of this. I hope that the excitement of getting back together and getting engaged hasn't masked or made them forget what the issues that forced them apart were.



^^^
This


I think she was being quite selfish and them 'sorting it out' seems to have been nothing more than him caving in. They seem to be disguising / fixing what ever problems they have with the wedding. Thats not good for the long game. 

I wonder that they are going to have at the stag do that is so 'rude' it's hard to watch?


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## machine cat (Jun 26, 2010)

Two girls one cup?


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## Bakunin (Jun 26, 2010)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:


> I wonder that they are going to have at the stag do that is so 'rude' it's hard to watch?



If it were my stag do, I'd insist on something involving 12 Playboy bunnies, a kilo of good skunk, a case of Bushmills and a vibrating, champagne-filled waterbed in the shape of a Fender Stratocaster.

And some whipped cream, obviously.


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## zoooo (Jun 26, 2010)

PandaCola said:


> Worst stag night ever- going from flat to flat watching hardcore porn on laptops. From the reaction of him and his weird mates, I can only assume they are watching beastiality, kiddie porn or shit swallowing. Is this really the kind of thing BT want to encourage? Hopefully, the sinister ex-husband will find out and lock the groom up in an underground torture chamber to keep him away from oversensitive daughter.



The bloke at the beginning at the laptop looks sooooo familiar.
Who is he?


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## kabbes (Jun 27, 2010)

missfran said:


> Every time I see the one where the daughter gets upset because her dad keeps cutting her off while on his mobile, I hope the mum replies with "it's because daddy doesn't love you, darling".



On the other hand, you know Vodafone Dad loves his daughter because he uses his mobile.

It's a minefield, this phoning your daughter lark.


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## beeboo (Jun 28, 2010)

kabbes said:


> On the other hand, you know Vodafone Dad loves his daughter because he uses his mobile.
> 
> It's a minefield, this phoning your daughter lark.



Is it just me who thinks there's a creepy incestuous undercurrent between vodaphone dad and daughter?  It really weirds me out.


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## tommers (Jun 30, 2010)

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/bt-adverts-cause-40%-drop-in-national-iq-201006302862/


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## Santino (Jun 30, 2010)

What sort of cunt rings Directory Enquiries and then asks for a 'nice curry house', specifying that it must be 'on the High Street'? 

'Which High Street, you motherfucker/ I work in a call centre in Swansea! How do I know if it's fucking nice? Cunt!' is what I imagine was the reply.


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## fogbat (Jun 30, 2010)

Santino said:


> What sort of cunt rings Directory Enquiries and then asks for a 'nice curry house', specifying that it must be 'on the High Street'?
> 
> 'Which High Street, you motherfucker/ I work in a call centre in Swansea! How do I know if it's fucking nice? Cunt!' is what I imagine was the reply.



Having known people who worked in call centres in Swansea, that is almost certainly the likely response.


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## T & P (Jun 30, 2010)

I haven't seen the latest ad about the stag do. Something to look forward to when the ad breaks come.


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## skyscraper101 (Jun 30, 2010)

santino said:


> what sort of cunt rings directory enquiries and then asks for a 'nice curry house', specifying that it must be 'on the high street'?
> 
> 'which high street, you motherfucker/ i work in a call centre in swansea! How do i know if it's fucking nice? Cunt!' is what i imagine was the reply.







fogbat said:


> having known people who worked in call centres in swansea, that is almost certainly the likely response.


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## T & P (Jul 19, 2010)

Oh noes! Latest ad is out and dark clouds appear to be gathering. Is she getting cold feet? About to dump him? Or is she actually up the duff?

But more importantly, YOU can decide the outcome (well, sort of) by voting for what you'd like to happen: www.bt.com/vote

Sadly the range of options is too limited for my liking... No 'they both die of Ebola the day before their wedding', for instance.


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## Chz (Jul 21, 2010)

I thought the same. I wanted to vote for "Stomach cancer".


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## rollinder (Jul 22, 2010)

a mad fan of Scott Mills who's just a bit obssed with these adverts was on the radio today wondering if the woman was pregnant (and a bit confused about whether they'd split up or not) . Scot and Becky reckon the next one'll reveal it's just trapped wind and the reason the relationship keeps falling apart is because he can't stand her farting all the time.


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## The Octagon (Aug 20, 2010)

1.6 million people voted for a pregnancy storyline?

1.6 million people need their fucking heads examining.


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## Kanda (Aug 20, 2010)

The Octagon said:


> 1.6 million people voted for a pregnancy storyline?
> 
> 1.6 million people need their fucking heads examining.


 
Ridiculous isn't it. There's even a bloody thread about it on Urban75!!!

er..


----------



## keithy (Aug 20, 2010)

I found out last night that my boyfriend likes these adverts. The relationship has been rocky of late, to say the least, and I think this is the last straw.


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## The Octagon (Aug 20, 2010)

keithy said:


> I found out last night that my boyfriend likes these adverts. The relationship has been rocky of late, to say the least, and I think this is the last straw.


 
Does he ever say "I think we're a bit like them, don't you?"


----------



## Fruitloop (Aug 20, 2010)

I wanted to vote for herpes.


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## The Octagon (Aug 20, 2010)

I wanted Chestburster.

Should have voted really....


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## keithy (Aug 20, 2010)

The Octagon said:


> Does he ever say "I think we're a bit like them, don't you?"


 
Ha! No. I was most dismayed when he didn't join in my angerful rantings about the whole pregnancy voting thing.


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## Fruitloop (Aug 20, 2010)

chestburster would have ruled.


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## keithy (Aug 20, 2010)

I logged on to see the options, hoping for "cancer" and was really REALLY fucked off that it was just "a) pregnant b)not pregnant". Hell, I'd have even gone for "c)not pregnant, and suffering horrific uterine deformity leading to infertility, disgusting side effects and eventual death"


----------



## Ranbay (Aug 20, 2010)

i think it was 1.6m votes... not 1.6 for pregnant...


----------



## Santino (Aug 20, 2010)

It reminds me of those polls in newspapers where people have rung a premium rate number in order to register an 'I don't know' response.


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## Epico (Aug 20, 2010)

What were the options?

If I find out that 1.6 million people went for 'pregnancy' as opose to something like 'gruesome car crash' I'll run through the streets shooting.

The alternative is that 99% of voters did vote for a 'violent death' - but BT didn't want to lose face.


----------



## keithy (Aug 20, 2010)

Epico said:


> What were the options?
> 
> If I find out that 1.6 million people went for 'pregnancy' as opose to something like 'gruesome car crash' I'll run through the streets shooting.
> 
> The alternative is that 99% of voters did vote for a 'violent death' - but BT didn't want to lose face.


 
AHEM!! :



keithy said:


> I logged on to see the options, hoping for "cancer" and was really REALLY fucked off that it was just *"a) pregnant b)not pregnant"*. Hell, I'd have even gone for "c)not pregnant, and suffering horrific uterine deformity leading to infertility, disgusting side effects and eventual death"


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## Epico (Aug 20, 2010)

Ah, that is utterly pointless. Fuck you BT. Fuck you!


----------

