# West Ham Utd 2012/13



## Ponyutd (Jun 18, 2012)

Fixture list out.
Aston Villa at home first game.
Arsenal boxing day.


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## Ponyutd (Jun 18, 2012)

*Barclays Premier League*

*Saturday 18 August*

15:00​




​West Ham United​​​v.​​​Aston Villa



​​​*Saturday 25 August*

15:00​



​Swansea City​​​v.​​​West Ham United



​​​*Saturday 1 September*

15:00​



​West Ham United​​​v.​​​Fulham



​​​*Saturday 15 September*

15:00​



​Norwich City​​​v.​​​West Ham United



​​​*Saturday 22 September*

15:00​



​West Ham United​​​v.​​​Sunderland



​​​*Saturday 29 September*

15:00​



​Queens Park Rangers​​​v.​​​West Ham United



​​​*Saturday 6 October*

15:00​



​West Ham United​​​v.​​​Arsenal



​​​*Saturday 20 October*

15:00​



​West Ham United​​​v.​​​Southampton



​​​*Sat*


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## tommers (Jun 18, 2012)

That's pretty kind, up to Arsenal.

We may just have a chance.


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## tommers (Jun 19, 2012)

We've signed Diame.  3 year deal.


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## Ponyutd (Jun 21, 2012)

We've lost Green to Q.P.R.


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## tommers (Jun 22, 2012)

Ponyutd said:


> We've lost Green to Q.P.R.


 
Yeah.  Bit gutted, would have preferred him to go somewhere abroad.  QPR doesn't seem like much point.

But the owners wouldn't give him the contract he wanted so he wanted to go somewhere they would.

Can't be angry with him.  He stayed with us when we went down and you know, look at his little face.


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## Ponyutd (Jun 22, 2012)

I was taken aback with the Rangers move. Just about a step up...not much in it.


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## tommers (Jun 24, 2012)

We've signed Brian Montenegro again.

Thank fuck for that.  Obviously I hope it's permanent but loan is also OK.

I think we're going to be just fine.


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## tommers (Jun 29, 2012)

Freddie Sears has gone.  Contract terminated by mutual consent.  Oh, what might have been.


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## tommers (Jul 1, 2012)

Linda is back though.  2 yr deal.

And stech has left.

New signing 'in 48 hrs'

It's all go.


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## chieftain (Jul 2, 2012)

Welcome back.


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## tommers (Jul 3, 2012)

Thanks Chief.  I'm feeling a bit lonely.


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## el-ahrairah (Jul 3, 2012)

i'm still here....


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## Libertad (Jul 3, 2012)

tommers said:


> Thanks Chief. I'm feeling a bit lonely.


 
Pull yerself together ffs


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## Corax (Jul 4, 2012)

You lot are after Gallas and Defoe apparently.


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## tommers (Jul 4, 2012)

Corax said:


> You lot are after Gallas and Defoe apparently.


 
Gallas maybe.  I'm not sure where Mini Judas would fit in to an Allardyce team (not that he isn't better than any other striker we currently have, apart from Carlton obviously.  I love Carlton.)  I have heard his name mentioned but nothing more than a rumour.

When's his contract up?  That seems to be our main concern.


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## el-ahrairah (Jul 6, 2012)

why would he rejoin us?  why would we have him?  although that said, our team needs a supply of poachers these days.  without vaz te we're nothing.


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## tommers (Jul 10, 2012)

Tomorrow's back pages? 'Hammers go for Carroll'


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## tommers (Jul 17, 2012)

Maiga is in the country.  I have no idea who he is, but apparently we're signing him.

The backpage of the Mirror says we are "in" for Berbatov.  Yes, that berbatov.  Hahaha, what a bunch of jokers.

I still love Carlton.  Do you know he turned down an £11 million move to Stoke last year.  Crazy stuff.

Phew, what a day.


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## tommers (Jul 18, 2012)

Maiga has signed for 6 million euros + 1 million in add ons.  Will be announced this afternoon.

David Sullivan's son Jack, just tweeted it.  I love this club.


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## tommers (Jul 25, 2012)

The latest from young Jack is that his dad (David Sullivan) is currently trying to complete a deal TWICE as big as any previous transfer.

And by big he means money. 


Somebody has already pointed out that no other club in the world would do this. 

I think it's brilliant.  If I was in charge of a football club I'd let my kid be the ultimate ITK too.


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## hammerntongues (Jul 25, 2012)

Hello chaps , this thread needs all the support it can get , we are back in the Prem and all we can muster is Tommers muttering to himself.

well we have to find 3 teams that are worse than us , not an optimistic start to the season but a reality check perhaps , we stumbled badly for a few weeks but finished strongly and were playing some decent football  , it took BFS a while to get it right but we started to play a bit of football and  at the same time show some of the resilience that Allardyces teams are known for

- I am reasonable confident that we can see the better of Reading who I think managed a brilliant late run towards the end of the season but will struggle next .
- Southampton Ditto
- Swansea without Brendon Rogers ?? a team that were used to playing with/for each other , unlike us Hammers who were thrown together
- Norwich without Lambert ?? see above .
-Wigan could go either way but I see another relegation battle.

Wishful thinking ? without doubt but bring it on .

COYI !!!!!!!!!


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## tommers (Jul 25, 2012)

It's Andy Carroll.  

I would love him here. Same agent as BFS and Nolan (and Collison I think) so maybe not quite as ludicrous as it sounds. Plus the well-documented relationship with Nolan.   Who knows?  Can only imagine the fee would be paid over the next 20 yrs mind.

HT - norwich, Swansea, WBA, soton, reading, fulham? QPR seem to be reassembling our 2008 squad. I can't actually think of any more.


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## Thaw (Jul 29, 2012)

Ivan Ramis is signing from Mallorca. Sounds like a decent centre-back to slot in alongside Tomkins. I reckon a good creative attacking midfielder is needed next but I don't see the point of spunking £20million on Carroll though - there must be cheaper ways to fill the role of 'big fella to hoof the ball up to and lay-off to Nolan'


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## tommers (Jul 29, 2012)

He sounds decent. Good, reliable defender.  Just what we need.

I can't think that Carroll will ever come here and do we really need another striker?  We only ever play one!  I think we need another centre back, full back and maybe a winger.

Morrison will do the att mid this year. Unless he kills somebody or something.


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## Thaw (Jul 29, 2012)

Rumour that Sam is interested in some German/Polish bloke called Seb Boenisch. He can play all across the back 4...will come in handy as I'm sure either Demel or Linda will have a bit or a 'mare.

Dunno about Morrison. By the end of the season he'll either be worth £20 million and be off to Liverpool or will be on loan at Barnet and end up a poor man's Joey Barton. I've only seen him on youtube so far so hopefully he'll be at the dev squad game at Wimbledon next Saturday.


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## tommers (Jul 30, 2012)

I think he's ill. At least that's why he said he was sent home early from Germany.


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## tommers (Jul 30, 2012)

Lots of rumours (well, more specifically from young Jack) to say we are going to sign somebody BIG tomorrow or Weds.  Defender or midfielder I think.

Like record transfer signing big.  Hmm....


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## hammerntongues (Jul 31, 2012)

Someone at the BEEB thinks its true , I cant see it myself , agreeing terms is one thing getting him to come is another . I do think he would be an amazing signing but i would worry about dressing room politics if he comes on 60-80k a week , Vaz Te was already grumbling at the end of the season.


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## tommers (Jul 31, 2012)

Carroll said no.

Ramos still not signed.  Collins coming.

JS or rather DS, now saying 1 player in today and more 'in next 7 days'.

Panic over.


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## tommers (Aug 1, 2012)

Ginge is a hammer again. Welcome home you massive baldy clumsy magnificent bastard.


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## Thaw (Aug 1, 2012)

DrunkPushkin said:


> Ivan Ramis is signing from Mallorca. Sounds like a decent centre-back to slot in alongside Tomkins. I reckon a good creative attacking midfielder is needed next but I don't see the point of spunking £20million on Carroll though - there must be cheaper ways to fill the role of 'big fella to hoof the ball up to and lay-off to Nolan'


Damn, I jinxed it. Looks like he's off to Wigan coz Martinez is Spanish. I'm pretty sure there are gonna be more Spanish people in London than Wigan. We've got tapas bars and everything. The man is obviously mad.


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## el-ahrairah (Aug 1, 2012)

i'm actually fairly sure that carroll would do very well if he can be persuaded to be our goal hanger.


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## tommers (Aug 6, 2012)

Morrison has gone to brum on loan for a year.

Rumours abound obviously.


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## Deareg (Aug 6, 2012)

tommers said:


> Morrison has gone to brum on loan for a year.
> 
> Rumours abound obviously.


Hope he isn't going to throw away what could be a very good career.


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## tommers (Aug 6, 2012)

Deareg said:


> Hope he isn't going to throw away what could be a very good career.


 
Yeah, me too.  He's supposed to have had stand up rows with Nolan and now Neil Macdonald - our assistant manager.  Hence being sent out on loan.

He also left the pre-season tour very early.  He said he was ill - but played for the development squad and went off to eurodisney soon after.  Who knows what's going on, but looks like he doesn't like being told what to do.

Be interesting to see how he goes at Brum.


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## tommers (Aug 10, 2012)

We've signed alou diarra. The former French captain alou diarra.  Blimey.


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## tommers (Aug 18, 2012)

Carlton is such a fucking hero.

And diame has been superb.


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## Libertad (Aug 18, 2012)

And we're off, that'll do.  Sounded like we nearly had another in the death as well.


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## 5t3IIa (Aug 18, 2012)

Tube packed wiv 'ammers and I heard cheering again


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## Libertad (Aug 18, 2012)

5t3IIa said:


> Tube packed wiv 'ammers and I heard cheering again


 
Are you feeling the lure of the Claret and Blue yet then 5t3lla?


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## 5t3IIa (Aug 18, 2012)

Libertad said:


> Are you feeling the lure of the Claret and Blue yet then 5t3lla?


 
I like the cheering  Happy humans roaring is a lovely sound 

edit: Oh, the _lure, _not 'love'. Hmm. Not sure. Maybe later in the year when it's a bit frciking cooler


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## el-ahrairah (Aug 20, 2012)

well, when was the last time we won the first game of the season in the premiership?


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## Thaw (Aug 21, 2012)

Not a very pretty game but no complaints. Collins was great...very old fashioned centre-half, Nolan did his usual trick of doing nothing except score, I didn't think much of the Taylor/McCartney combo on the left, Maiga looked very composed and was unlucky not to score, Vaz Te was a bit anonymous, my heart sank a bit to see Tomka in midfield again, Jussi didn't have much to do but made a couple of good saves...um, what else...I was right in the sun in the 2nd half and it was DAMN hot.

Next up - I reckon Swansea are the type of fancy-pants show-off passing team Sam loves to deplete, punish and destroy and we'll beat them 2-0.


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## tommers (Aug 21, 2012)

I have my doubts about Saturday, but I also think that a midfield of Diame, Diarra and Nolan is going to fuck some teams right up.  I like being the bullies, it makes a nice change.  

We are absolutely massive - is anybody under 6'?  Maybe Linda, Noble?  Cole, Vaz Te, Diame, Diarra, Collins, Tomkins, Reid, Demel - all well over.  I'm loving it.  Saturday was a proper professional performance.  Well organised, and we're going to have to do that this season.  Teams aren't going to fancy coming to the Boleyn.


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## tommers (Aug 21, 2012)

Baldock's gone to bristol city.


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## hammerntongues (Aug 22, 2012)

DrunkPushkin said:


> Not a very pretty game but no complaints. Collins was great...very old fashioned centre-half, Nolan did his usual trick of doing nothing except score, I didn't think much of the Taylor/McCartney combo on the left, Maiga looked very composed and was unlucky not to score, Vaz Te was a bit anonymous, my heart sank a bit to see Tomka in midfield again, Jussi didn't have much to do but made a couple of good saves...um, what else...I was right in the sun in the 2nd half and it was DAMN hot.
> 
> Next up - I reckon Swansea are the type of fancy-pants show-off passing team Sam loves to deplete, punish and destroy and we'll beat them 2-0.


 
I was a bit surprised to see Reid start ahead of Tomkins but it proved to be a good call , Reid could have got MOM himself and JT did provide extra cover for an already solid back 4 when he came on . We will know a lot more about Diame after a couple more games but on first showing he was immense and good to see him in a more advanced position than we were all expecting . Taylor/McCartney seemed to lack a bit of pace but we already knew that and lets put Vaz Te down to a bad day  , both Cole and Noble did everything you would expect and more .

Lots to look forward to and I even felt a bit of LOVE coming from the stands towards  BFS , will we ever sing it ? Not yet but I feel it coming ................

COYI !!!!


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## Thaw (Aug 22, 2012)

I don't expect Taylor and McCartney to be lightning fast but there were a couple of moments when they just seemed to get in each others way as if they didn't know how to overlap, and it all looked very clumsy.  Jarvis/Drenthe/Richardson should get in ahead of Taylor unless we're being v. cautious.

The highlight for me was the distinct lack of moaning in the Chicken Run. I think thats mainly because all the usual whipping boys have been shipped out (i.e. Faubert). Sadly, a couple of blokes behind me were bitching about Carlton all game which I thought was really harsh.

Such a relief to get the 1st weekend out of the way and realise we're not the worst team in the league.


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## hammerntongues (Aug 23, 2012)

I get really pissed off when fans give Cole shit , they just don`t get it , idiots .  Few work harder .


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

Jarvis coming?  What do we think about that?

And for £7.5 million, rising to £10.75 million with "add ons" (whatever they are)... what do we think about that too?


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## el-ahrairah (Aug 23, 2012)

well, get the balls into the box like a boss.  if these balls can be collected and acted upon that should add a fair whack of goals this season.  if it works we'll not even mention the price - which, let's face it, is pretty high.


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

Scratch that.  Getting ahead of myself.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

How long until he breaks, pulls, twists or loses a body part then?


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

Next game.  Snapped achilles I reckon.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

He'd still be quicker than Faubert.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

What's BFS got against nippy little strikers, btw?

(I know the answer already, but indulge me)


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

He plays one up doesn't he?  No space for a defoe or a baldock.  Not many play with 2 up any more.

TBF we were shit last year when we played 4-4-2.  Really bad.

I imagine he has a spreadsheet somewhere which deals with it all.


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

He wants the whole team to chase and pressure the opposition as well, I suppose.  Everybody tracks back and defends.  I can't see much getting through a midfield of Diarra, Diame and Nolan / Noble, and any long balls will be snaffled up by ginge and reid / tomkins.

I'm getting to be a little bit optimistic.

Fucking shoot me.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

I thought we were shit at 4-4-2 as we had no wingers - Matt Taylor was about as close as we got to one.

I still can't believe there was no space for Brian.


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

Yeah, I suppose so.  Midfielders, rather than wingers.

I'm not even sure if Brian is still here.  Obviously he is, and always will be, in my heart - but I don't know if he plays for us any more.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

tommers said:


> He wants the whole team to chase and pressure the opposition as well, I suppose. Everybody tracks back and defends. I can't see much getting through a midfield of Diarra, Diame and Nolan / Noble, and any long balls will be snaffled up by ginge and reid / tomkins.
> 
> I'm getting to be a little bit optimistic.
> 
> Fucking shoot me.


 
We never learn, do we?

(I'm still quite sad about what could have been with Pards.  We really should have got him a few concubines)


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

Wiki said:
			
		

> West Ham United
> He joined West Ham on 29 August 2011 where he signed a season-long loan contract saying, "I am very excited to come here and play in England, especially for a club like West Ham. I am hoping to get a chance to show the fans what I can do."[3][2] Montenegro's debut game came on 8 January 2012 in a 1–0 FA Cup third round away defeat to Sheffield Wednesday.[4] At the end of the season, a new contract was not agreed and he returned to Paraquay.[5][6]
> *[edit] Tacuary*
> 
> He came on as a second-half substitute for Tacuary in their match against Libertad in August 2012.[7]


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

He was just too short.


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

He was just too sexy.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

East London just couldn't handle him.

I never saw his dance.  I reckon Faces dancefloor saw it a fair few times.


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## tommers (Aug 23, 2012)

I wouldn't mind but I don't how I'm going to get rid of this tattoo.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

tommers said:


> I wouldn't mind but I don't how I'm going to get rid of this tattoo.


 


Just steer clear of communal changing rooms and only the missus need know.


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## mattie (Aug 23, 2012)

Anyway, pending success of tommers' laser surgery, the boy Montenegro won't be seen at UP for a while so we'll have to get by.

Aren't we on the box on Saturday? Good chance to see how high Diame can launch it up to Carlton. Very continental, if that continent is Australia.

Eta: Oh, we are - 12:45 against the west taffs.  They're quite a slick footballing team, so Diame et al need to kick them up in the air quick-sharp.


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## tommers (Aug 24, 2012)

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20120824/jarvis-joins-hammers_2236884_2897815

Official now.  Including picture of him holding up a shirt and looking a bit sheepish.

Sam says that might be it now "except for loans."


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## discokermit (Aug 24, 2012)

pricey but a good player, if he can regain the form he had before his england call up.


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## tommers (Aug 25, 2012)

2 mistakes.  2 goals.

And we've had it cleared off the line about 4 times.

It's gonna be one of those days.


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## Deareg (Aug 25, 2012)

It has been quite rough in patch's with both sides attempting to play the man, Is their some history between the two teams?


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## Balbi (Aug 25, 2012)

tommers said:


> Ginge is a hammer again. Welcome home you massive baldy clumsy magnificent bastard.



Epic foreshadowing there tommers.


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## Libertad (Aug 25, 2012)




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## tommers (Aug 25, 2012)

Their third goal was good.


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## tommers (Aug 25, 2012)

Weeelllll... what a weird game.  2 shitty errors and it's all over.  Swansea looked good 2nd half, we didn't but if it had been 0-0 who knows?

And when did Wayne fucking Routledge become good?  Seriously?  Have I been asleep or something?


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## gabi (Aug 25, 2012)

Give some credit to Swansea man - they're on fire. It won't last once they hit the big boys but respect to their new boss.


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## tommers (Aug 25, 2012)

Yeah, they were good. Great movement and passing and always got the loose balls and rebounds.

Nice line in girly hair and rolling about too.


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## Libertad (Aug 25, 2012)

Is it too late to get Green back?


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## tommers (Aug 25, 2012)

Libertad said:


> Is it too late to get Green back?



I'm not sure he's the answer.

We'll be alright. Just a bad day at the office against a very good team in very good form.


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## Libertad (Aug 25, 2012)

tommers said:


> I'm not sure he's the answer.
> 
> We'll be alright. Just a bad day at the office against a very good team in very good form.


 
 Yeah, we'll live. Just need to pick it up a bit.


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## Plumdaff (Aug 25, 2012)

tommers said:


> And when did Wayne fucking Routledge become good?  Seriously?  Have I been asleep or something?



Ever since Sinclair handed his transfer request, it's Laudrup magic or something. He's been a different, actually really good player this season. 

Think you might have a point about the first half but we were bloody great and you were ragged in the second. Of course this won't last but what a ride while it does.


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## Ponyutd (Aug 25, 2012)

BBC LATEST: West Ham's appeal to the Championship for asylum has been refused. They now plan to ask Ecuador.


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## tommers (Aug 26, 2012)

That racist twat who was being all racist to Carlton on twitter has been arrested.  Good. The racist twat.


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## JimW (Aug 28, 2012)

Tough night in prospect for the Hammers as the mighty Alex roll into town, fresh from a six goal thriller at the weekend (only five of which went in our net).


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## el-ahrairah (Aug 28, 2012)

i think we'll edge you, but it'll make you look good.


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## tommers (Aug 28, 2012)

Yeah, you'll really think you're going places.

It'll be a good runout for Diarra, Tomkins etc.  We could do with both of those getting up to speed.


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## mattie (Aug 29, 2012)

Unusually professional. It makes BFS seem even more alien.

On a side note, wonder if we'll buy any more of Mark Curtis' significantly over-priced players before end of window?


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## tommers (Aug 29, 2012)

mattie said:


> Unusually professional. It makes BFS seem even more alien.
> 
> On a side note, wonder if we'll buy any more of Mark Curtis' significantly over-priced players before end of window?




Hmmm. That was noted,  but surely the 2 Daves are well aware of the link?


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## mattie (Aug 29, 2012)

tommers said:


> Hmmm. That was noted, but surely the 2 Daves are well aware of the link?


 
They seem singularly unconcerned if they are.

I don't get it. Manager represented by agent, club buys agent's players/makes generous contract improvements to agent's players and no-one seems that bothered.  We bought Kevin Nolan when we were in the championship, and he was coming off of captaining a premiership team.  5-year deal as well, at a club with a poor recent history.

We had it with Bungpuss, we had it with Nani, could do without it with BFS.


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Oooh. Jack says we expect to sign a top, top class striker today.

How exciting!

(It's Jay boothroyd innit?)


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## Balbi (Aug 30, 2012)

Berba?


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

I wish. That would be amazing.

More likely kenwyne Jones.


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## Ponyutd (Aug 30, 2012)

I thought Fiorentina had bought him?


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## hammerntongues (Aug 30, 2012)

more likely I would think but  cant see him being a Sam type player though , bugger doesn`t do anything apart from score .


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

The tweet says 'my dad doesn't give up' - which would imply it's Carroll... but I really can't see that.

Oh well, we'll find out soon enough.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

In a panic-stricken moment I had visions of Kevin Davies in claret and blue.


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## Balbi (Aug 30, 2012)

James Beattie and Dave Kitson remain clubless.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Balbi said:


> James Beattie and Dave Kitson remain clubless.


 


You win.  That is worse than Kevin Davies.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Balbi said:


> Berba?


 
Fulham, if reports are to be believed.


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

He's said it's not berbatov.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> He's said it's not berbatov.


 
He's a big tease, isn't he?


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

I just checked Jack's twitter feed for the first time in ages, and the fist word I saw was 'Heskey'

Him and Carlton.  Unstoppable.


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## Balbi (Aug 30, 2012)

If West Ham sign Heskey I will support you lot to the hilt this year. A select group of alcoholic misanthropes in my local have formed Team Heskey, and we support those bobbins' players who are at the top level. Heskey, Forlan at Utd, Hayden Mullins, Andy Carroll...all in Team Heskey.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Balbi said:


> If West Ham sign Heskey I will support you lot to the hilt this year. A select group of alcoholic misanthropes in my local have formed Team Heskey, and we support those bobbins' players who are at the top level. Heskey, Forlan at Utd, Hayden Mullins, Andy Carroll...all in Team Heskey.


 
You'd need a drink, supporting that lot.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Yossi pitching around for another club - apparently in talks with representatives of 2 in London, not sure who.

Could do a lot worse, he's superbly skilful, but don't think he'll fit the current style.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Rumour on KUMB that we might go after Dempsey with Noble as part of the deal.

Great.  The one midfielder with some vision and passing ability, and we look to chop him in.


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Won't happen Mattie.





Dempsey would never come here.


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## hammerntongues (Aug 30, 2012)

maybe Obama has had a word ?


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> Dempsey would never come here.


 


hammerntongues said:


> maybe Obama has had a word ?


 


Canny bloke, that Barack.


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

For a minute there I was wondering why Obinna would have anything to do with it.

Anyway, SSN saying we've agreed a fee with our red cousins Cardiff for Maynard.  Another one who didn't quite fit.  He did look good though.

We wouldn't do that unless there's somebody coming in. 

Would we?


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

And now Jack has retweeted somebody saying Maynard is our best striker and we must be getting somebody better in.

BETTER than Nicky Maynard????

Who on earth can it be?


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> For a minute there I was wondering why Obinna would have anything to do with it.
> 
> Anyway, SSN saying we've agreed a fee with our red cousins Cardiff for Maynard. Another one who didn't quite fit. He did look good though.
> 
> ...


 
Are you hinting BFS is after a taller model of striker?

I don't know why he doesn't just buy Crouch and have done with it.


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

I would love Crouch TBF. 

I'm starting to think it might be Carroll.  Which would be um... strange.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

I just wonder if Curtis, BFS et al can be quite that blatant.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Obligatory mention of Michael Owen on twitter.

He'd need stilts.


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## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Balbi said:


> Berba?


 

Beeb are reporting £4M to Fulham, which seems a (relative) bargain.


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## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Indeed. Was Jol his manager at Tottenham? Can't remember. Big wages though, I reckon.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> Indeed. Was Jol his manager at Tottenham? Can't remember. Big wages though, I reckon.


 
Yep, Jol bought him, I think Ramos may have sold him.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

> Our problem is I have since moved on financially. When I first went for Andy Carroll I could afford him, whether I could now is a different matter.
> 
> At the very best I think one player will be joining us before the deadline tomorrow.


 
So says BFS.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Hence selling Maynard.

This reeks of Sullivan.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

I must admit, I'm intrigued.

Be a bit awkward if we didn't land him/someone and we've just flogged off our strikers in preparation.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

If young Jack lets me down this time then I'm going to order pizzas to his dad's house for a week.  Little scrote.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

He'd quite like that, I'd imagine.


----------



## andy2002 (Aug 30, 2012)

It's Carroll, on a season-long loan apparently.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Joy of joys.

BFS and Curtis will be smoking the havanas tonight.

Not the quickest but a good player nonetheless, so let's enjoy it for what it's worth.  Interested to see how he gets on with Jarvis giving some width - anything but aimless pumping the ball up.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Wow.  I didn't think that would happen.  Lots of people saying he's signed but nothing official yet.

Also talk that it's just a straight loan - £2 million + his wages.

Got to love Liverpool.   Great stuff.


----------



## agricola (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> Wow. I didn't think that would happen. Lots of people saying he's signed but nothing official yet.
> 
> Also talk that it's just a straight loan - £2 million + his wages.
> 
> Got to love Liverpool.  Great stuff.


 
Not sure it is a straight loan, some of the stuff Rodgers has come out with would tend to suggest that he isnt going to be seeing Carroll back at Anfield:




			
				a nutcase said:
			
		

> "Andy is at West Ham, going through a medical there," Rodgers said. "It is very simple - the club have made a monumental investment in big Andy. At the moment he is not playing. He made it very clear he wanted to play games and this is his last chance to do that."
> 
> Having conceded defeat in their chase for Carroll earlier this month, West Ham were given signs of encouragement on Thursday.
> 
> ...


 
I think its a fantastic deal tbh, the RS have - to my recollection at least - never played to his strengths.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Well, we ain't got money to buy him - we had to move Maynard on to cover the loan fee!

It's official btw - http://www.whufc.com/articles/20120830/hammers-net-carroll_2236884_2905248


----------



## friedaweed (Aug 30, 2012)

"It's great to be eeeeeeeroooooowwwwww at West Ham and all signed up - I just can't wait to get my saddle on now and give kids rides up and down the beach" Carroll said


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Well yes, obviously we're the idiots in this whole story.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

I don't get it.

To be fair, I rarely do.


----------



## agricola (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> Well yes, obviously we're the idiots in this whole story.


 
Indeed.  I wonder if they have realised that this transfer can only ever work out badly for them?


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

It's going to be very interesting to see how he goes with a whole team built around him and playing exactly to his strengths.  Jarvis was bought specifically to provide the crosses to a player like Carroll (even if that turned out to be Carlton) and he is pretty much the perfect player for BFS's system.  Diarra and Diame win it, get it out to Jarvis or RVT, they cross it into Carroll and he knocks it down for Nolan or the wingers or he scores himself.

I think he's going to do well.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

agricola said:


> Indeed. I wonder if they have realised that this transfer can only ever work out badly for them?


 
Just read the official story and you're right, we've got an option to buy at the end of the season.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)




----------



## friedaweed (Aug 30, 2012)

agricola said:


> Indeed. I wonder if they have realised that this transfer can only ever work out badly for them?


It worked out badly when we signed him. It doesn't go bad twice. Personally glad to see the back of him and I'm glad the hammers think they might have something magic.
Welcome to our world. Lazy, lanky, twat  Best of luck


----------



## Balbi (Aug 30, 2012)

Explains why Kevin Nolan's there. He did a real big brother job on Carroll at Newcastle iirc. Canny Sam.


----------



## twistedAM (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> Well yes, obviously we're the idiots in this whole story.


 
Better being a professional international footballer at any club than an amateurish WUM on a message board


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


>


 
Nice, broad forehead.  BFS has done his homework.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Balbi said:


> Explains why Kevin Nolan's there. He did a real big brother job on Carroll at Newcastle iirc. Canny Sam.


 

Here's the conspiracy theory.  There is the well documented link with Nolan putting his huge manly arms round him when he went off the rails at Newcastle, there's the fact he stayed at his house... and there's also the fact that Nolan, Sam and Carroll (and, since Sam arrived, Collison and Tomkins).. oh, and Jarvis.... all have the same agent.    I'm just going to ignore all that TBF.


----------



## Balbi (Aug 30, 2012)

If it's Willie McKay, then that ain't no conspiracy. We had that shite.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> Here's the conspiracy theory. There is the well documented link with Nolan putting his huge manly arms round him when he went off the rails at Newcastle, there's the fact he stayed at his house... and there's also the fact that Nolan, Sam and Carroll (and, since Sam arrived, Collison and Tomkins).. oh, and Jarvis.... all have the same agent.  I'm just going to ignore all that TBF.


 
To be fair, at least this dodginess has resulted in some decent players landing.

I'm still in shock over Savio.  WTF happened there?  I was expecting the next George Weah and we ended up with a scared schoolchild sitting on the bench.  

The most surprising bit was BFS going for Jarvis - he's only 5'6".


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

Balbi said:


> If it's Willie McKay, then that ain't no conspiracy. We had that shite.


 
Mark Curtis, but Wilie McKay is of a similar breed.

The problem is really that Curtis is BFS' agent


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

Nah.  That's Harry.

This is Sam, so it's Mark Curtis.  The murky world of professional football eh?

This is probably our best ever transfer window though... certainly since Tevez and Mascherano.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

mattie said:


> To be fair, at least this dodginess has resulted in some decent players landing.
> 
> I'm still in shock over Savio. WTF happened there? I was expecting the next George Weah and we ended up with a scared schoolchild sitting on the bench.
> 
> The most surprising bit was BFS going for Jarvis - he's only 5'6".


 

Yeah.  If this is wrong then maybe I don't want to be right. 

Jarvis may only be 5' 6" but I think he is now our only player under 6'.  Maybe Noble?  Or McCartney?

And yes, think of how we were 3 years ago.  Savio, Walter Lopez, that rubbish Brazillian, that mexican fella (even though I did love him) and Kepa fucking Blanco.  David Sullivan is one shrewd fucker.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

In terms of requisite lankiness, I think Gary O'Neill is 'at risk', with Matt Taylor looking nervously over his shoulder.

As a complete aside, does Piquionne still play for us?  Well, is he still registered with us, is perhaps more what I'm asking.


----------



## mattie (Aug 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> Nah. That's Harry.
> 
> This is Sam, so it's Mark Curtis. The murky world of professional football eh?
> 
> This is probably our best ever transfer window though... *certainly since Tevez and Mascherano*.


 
Uh oh.


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2012)

mattie said:


> Uh oh.


 

Well... what could possibly go wrong?  

Relegated by Xmas.


----------



## Ponyutd (Aug 31, 2012)

Berbatov vs Carroll at West Ham vs Fulham....who'd have thought it!


----------



## mattie (Aug 31, 2012)

tommers said:


> Well... what could possibly go wrong?
> 
> Relegated by Xmas.


 
I'm hoping him and Maiga are more Hartson & Kitson.

Karen Brady doesn't have Icelandic grandparents, does she?  And I hope she's deleted Scott Duxberry's number from her phone.  All that being true, we'll be golden.


----------



## mattie (Aug 31, 2012)

Anyway, now we've got him, someone has to ask......


What season-ending injury will he suffer playing for England next week?


----------



## The39thStep (Aug 31, 2012)

Allardyce /Carlton Cole /Andy Carroll  combination. Can see a few midfielders at West Ham being told to forget a short passing game for the rest of the season.


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2012)

The39thStep said:


> Allardyce /Carlton Cole /Andy Carroll  combination. Can see a few midfielders at West Ham being told to forget a short passing game for the rest of the season.



Lazy.


----------



## The39thStep (Aug 31, 2012)

Actually I wish Carroll and West Ham the best. It could be the best business of the season if he is able to settle. When he made his England debut and scored it seemed that he could do no wrong


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2012)

The39thStep said:


> Actually I wish Carroll and West Ham the best. It could be the best business of the season if he is able to settle. When he made his England debut and scored it seemed that he could do no wrong



Let's hope so.  God knows what happened at Liverpool.  If we can keep him, Jarvis and diarra / diame fit then we could have a good season.

It'll be competitive, if nothing else - and that's something we've been missing for years.


----------



## Thaw (Aug 31, 2012)

A friend of a friend who works at the club says (1) we're only(!) paying Carroll £50k p/w not the full 80k, (2) there is no up-front fee involved, and (3) the option to buy is for £15million.

Benayoun and Sulemanji are still in talks so I reckon we're still looking for an attacking midfielder. But Joe Cole wants too much money.


----------



## mattie (Aug 31, 2012)

Yossi would do me fine.  Wonderfully skilful, and can play wide.


----------



## tommers (Sep 1, 2012)

mattie said:


> Yossi would do me fine.  Wonderfully skilful, and can play wide.



You got your wish Mattie. Uncle Dave came through for you.

Jussi, Henderson, that young Swiss gk kid, Collins, diame, diarra, Carroll, maiga and benayoun in.

Bouba diop, baldock, Maynard, faubert, Faye, green and lansbury out.

Got to give it to em.


----------



## friedaweed (Sep 1, 2012)

Finally realised why he was so shit for us.
*UMBRO* boots FFS

Get him a new boot deal Tommers or the lanky cunt'll be slipping all over the place and falling over plenty like he did for us.


----------



## TruXta (Sep 1, 2012)

Seems like AC has made his mark already?


----------



## Lo Siento. (Sep 1, 2012)

how giant are West Ham?


----------



## Dandred (Sep 1, 2012)

Carrol just gone off injured....


----------



## TruXta (Sep 1, 2012)

If he continues like this we might actually recoup most of the money we paid for him at the end of the season. Hopefully this will work out for him playing-wise, God knows he can do with getting a good run of games in.


----------



## Libertad (Sep 1, 2012)

That's better  *sinks imaginary beer*


----------



## Deareg (Sep 1, 2012)

TruXta said:


> If he continues like this we might actually recoup most of the money we paid for him at the end of the season. Hopefully this will work out for him playing-wise, God knows he can do with getting a good run of games in.


I heard Liverpool just bid 37 million for him after that performance.


----------



## The39thStep (Sep 1, 2012)

West Ham destroyed them I thought.


----------



## TruXta (Sep 1, 2012)

Deareg said:


> I heard Liverpool just bid 37 million for him after that performance.


 
Oh my sides.


----------



## Thaw (Sep 1, 2012)

Disappointed not to see Jarvis get his home debut but I presume he was injured? Pretty faultless first-half (apart from maybe Joey O'Brien who was a wee bit dodgy at left-back).  Taylor at LB and Jarvis or Yossi on the wing would've been nice. Half-Maori, half-Viking Winston Reid is slowly becoming one of my favourite players. 2 whole weeks til the Norwich game...agghh. Still, hopefully all the new lads will have had time to make friends and get settled into their new luxury apartments by then.


----------



## tommers (Sep 1, 2012)

I think Jarvis got injured pre-game?  And Yossi wasn't eligible cos he signed too late.

I haven't seen the game, but by all accounts we destroyed em.  Looking forward to MOTD.  That Andy Carroll looks like a good player, wonder why nobody's noticed before?


----------



## Thaw (Sep 2, 2012)

Thats what I figured but I was a bit worried he'd done a Beauchamp or Boogers.


----------



## Thaw (Sep 2, 2012)

Incidentally, Martin Jol is full of shit. How is the first goal 'long-ball'? Fulham hoof it down the park, Collins' headed clearance goes back to Carroll, who nods it down to Vaz Te - then a nice short through ball for Nolan to score. The next 2 were set pieces that they didnt defend properly by having 3 men marking Carroll.

We did destroy them. Tackled well in midfield, Noble kept things ticking over, Reid and Collins cleared everything they had to, Vaz Te ran at them and Carroll bullied their defence and brought the midfield into the attack. Even Nolan played well. And Jussi made some really good saves, esp in the 2nd half when Berbatov improved them a fair bit.


----------



## tommers (Sep 2, 2012)

I only saw the highlights but we looked properly good, and nice to see shearer and even bungpuss saying how well we played. Shearer made a point of saying how it wasn't long ball - it's just an easy excuse for managers I suppose.  Even bloody Harry said that his spurs side used to hit diagonals to crouch. It's all perceptions and allardyce has a tag.

Diame is going to be one of the buys of the season and Carroll seems perfect for us.  Looking forward to it.


----------



## Lo Siento. (Sep 2, 2012)

tommers said:


> I only saw the highlights but we looked properly good, and nice to see shearer and even bungpuss saying how well we played. Shearer made a point of saying how it wasn't long ball - it's just an easy excuse for managers I suppose.  Even bloody Harry said that his spurs side used to hit diagonals to crouch. It's all perceptions and allardyce has a tag.
> 
> Diame is going to be one of the buys of the season and Carroll seems perfect for us.  Looking forward to it.


Love Diame. he's an absolute diamond. He left Rayo 5 years ago and half the shirts still have his name on the back


----------



## mattie (Sep 2, 2012)

I saw Andy Carroll in my hotel bar in London on saturday night.  

He wasn't smashing up the place, being loudly drunk or pestering women or barstaff.  He's got a lot to learn.


----------



## tommers (Sep 2, 2012)

Was he limping?


----------



## mattie (Sep 3, 2012)

Looked OK to me, but him and his mate were sat in a corner with a pair of nice blondes all night.  I hope he didn't risk aggravating the injury later.


----------



## tommers (Sep 3, 2012)

Good. Don't tell woy.


----------



## tommers (Sep 4, 2012)

He's out for 6 weeks. 

Does this ever NOT happen?


----------



## friedaweed (Sep 5, 2012)

That's six weeks wages we're not paying. He's a shrewd fucker that Brendan Rogers


----------



## Ponyutd (Sep 6, 2012)

On the other side of the coin....you still have Joe Cole.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Sep 6, 2012)

Ponyutd said:


> On the other side of the coin....you still have Joe Cole.


 

I thought he was at Lille ?


----------



## Ponyutd (Sep 6, 2012)

The loan deal is over. He's back..and injured I think.


----------



## tommers (Sep 18, 2012)

Oh Brian. Brian. How could you?!? I gave you my fucking heart and this is how you repay me? Well fuck you Brian. Fuck you. You're dead to me now. Dead.

Gutted.

http://www.kumb.com/story.php?id=126471

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-...t-players-as-uruguay-s-ghost-deals-mount.html

Mattie will not be happy.


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 18, 2012)

i just came here to post that.  _et tu Brian?_


----------



## Monkeygrinder's Organ (Sep 18, 2012)

Dubious loan deals for South American strikers? Surely not.


----------



## tommers (Sep 18, 2012)

Monkeygrinder's Organ said:


> Dubious loan deals for South American strikers? Surely not.



We're always being taken advantage of. We're so trusting.

Fuck you Brian.


----------



## Monkeygrinder's Organ (Sep 18, 2012)

tommers said:


> We're always being taken advantage of. We're so trusting.


 
Poor old David Sullivan probably isn't used to having to deal with bad people.


----------



## tommers (Sep 22, 2012)

what a brilliant point.  Absolutely all over them second half.  I didn't think it was going to come and then up pops Kevin Nolan.  Brilliant!  That is what Allardyce is all about - competitiveness, not lying down, hassling opponents and keeping pressure up.  I love it.


----------



## Thaw (Sep 23, 2012)

Apart from the goal I think the highlights for me were:
1. In injury time Nolan giving Reid a bollocking for passing the ball to Jussi instead of getting forward and chasing a goal.
2. Demel getting stuck into the left back (Rose?), tearing down the wing and setting up Nolan for his volley
3. So many terrific crosses from Jarvis

Low points:
1. Not getting anyone on the end of said crosses.
2. Collins and Jussi stepping on the ball, giving the ball away and generally being clumsy and shit every now and again.
3. The ref letting Sunderland get away with so much time-wasting. The Campbell thing was ridiculous.


----------



## tommers (Oct 1, 2012)

Great first half.  Really dominated it and they never got a look in.  

Bit touch and go second half though, especially once that little shit Taarabt came on.  Lot easier once Diakite got sent off.

Jarvis looks like a great player and Nolan - Noble - Diame again one of the best midfields in the division....


----------



## tommers (Nov 3, 2012)

Great point.  Love it.  Should have won it too.  Bloody refs.


----------



## tommers (Nov 11, 2012)

Fucking get in.  Great win, probably the best yet.  Lots and lots of very unhappy Newcastle fans on twitter tonight.

have I said how much I love the team at the moment?  Proper fight and spirit - closing people down and putting an effort in.  Brilliant.

4 points from Man City at home and Newcastle Away - would take that all day long.


----------



## bluestreak (Nov 11, 2012)

second team in london.  above spuds and arsenal (for now).  shit, we only have to get the same amount of points in the next ten games and we're safe.  i mean, fucking hell we're nearly as good as West Brom


----------



## not-bono-ever (Nov 11, 2012)

Sam is doing well so far - NUFC are a shadow of their barnstorming selves this year tho' - Will you be glad to hand Carrol back at the end of the season ?


----------



## bluestreak (Nov 11, 2012)

too early to say.  i think he's doing well, not as well as the 35m price tag would have suggested but well enough to have a spot here if the price isn't too high.  so far so good but not great!


----------



## tommers (Nov 11, 2012)

Wins everything in the air.  Just needs to start scoring a few goals really and then he's set.

Don't think we'll sign him in the Summer mind, £17m might as well be £35m.


----------



## chieftain (Nov 11, 2012)

Nose bleed alert!


----------



## tommers (Nov 11, 2012)

Back where we belong.


----------



## discokermit (Nov 11, 2012)

how's jarvo doing?


----------



## tommers (Nov 11, 2012)

Personally I love him.  He never seems to give the ball away and always gets his cross in - and it's usually pretty decent.  Quick too, and I like the way he runs at people.

He went off injured today though, and he's already missed a couple of games, but hopefully he'll just get better and better as he gets used to us and likewise.  If he can get a run of games then I reckon he's going to be a bit of a legend.  A front 6 of Diame, Nolan, Noble, Yossi, Carroll and Jarvis is as good as anything outside the top 6 or so to my claret and blue eyes.

(And he used to play for Gillingham, so I've liked him since then.) 

Diame is an absolute monster.  Like a cut price Yaya Toure.  Instant hero.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2012)

Now THIS is an after match quote...




			
				Nolan said:
			
		

> Nolan, who was given a warm reception before the game, said: "It was a perfect scenario for me to score the winner. It was quite emotional when I did score the goal. I did say I was never going to celebrate scoring against Newcastle and I never will.
> "If I move on from West Ham I would never do it against them either. That was down to the support I received when I was here. I can't thank the fans enough for the reception I got. It was absolutely unbelievable. I had an absolutely fantastic time here. I love Newcastle and love everything about it - I made so many friends here along with my family. My boy is a Geordie, he was born here.
> "It was a fantastic performance by us and I was delighted with the goal. I couldn't have asked for a better club to go to than West Ham for the following they've got and the commitment and everything they show. I would love to think I can do the same for them that I did for Newcastle."


 
He's growing on me.


----------



## hammerntongues (Nov 12, 2012)

A great battling performance , Diame is immense in every sense , with all the draws at the foot of the table I can just about believe we are not going to involved in the relegation scrap at the end of the season , if and it is a big if , we beat Stoke next week at home then we can relax . Nolan is a player that inspires the rest of the team , a player who all else but his own fans love to hate , and you can see why . Credit to the BFS ,  if you had told us we would be above The Arse and Spuds after 11 games you would have been locked up .

COYI !!!!


----------



## mattie (Nov 12, 2012)

I caught some of that on a webstream - we're actually playing some decent football, people look confident on the ball, we're passing through defences and not just lumping it up.

Which pleads the question - who's that imposter dressed as Big Fat Samuel?

On a side note - Yossi injured, apparently.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2012)

For a while?  Sam said after the match that he expected all 3 of the injuries to be ready for Stoke on Monday and Jarvis was the most serious...

I have gone on record already with my love for all things BFS - his reputation in a little bit undeserved.  We played some nice stuff yesterday, and in the run up to the play offs last year.  He keeps things tight, gets the team working hard and for each other and then worries about the rest of it later.

Southampton pride themselves on playing what many would call "the West Ham way", and look where they are.

I genuinely think BFS is the best English manager there is.  Certainly the best we've had since Harry's pomp, and maybe even since Lyall.


----------



## mattie (Nov 12, 2012)

tommers said:


> For a while? Sam said after the match that he expected all 3 of the injuries to be ready for Stoke on Monday and Jarvis was the most serious...
> 
> I have gone on record already with my love for all things BFS - his reputation in a little bit undeserved. We played some nice stuff yesterday, and in the run up to the play offs last year. He keeps things tight, gets the team working hard and for each other and then worries about the rest of it later.
> 
> ...


 
It's interesting how his persona doesn't really reflect what he does - despite his rather portly figure and image of a man who could down a pork pie and a pint of bitter in ten seconds flat, he's an advocate of sports nutrition and scientific approaches to fitness. His tactics can be a touch crude, but even at Bolton he found room for Okocha who was a wonderful player to watch.

I will admit to being concerned when he was talking of letting Noble go after having recruited Nolan, as it implied we'd be all effort and no insight, but that's not transpired (I was also a bit worried we'd be a team made up of dodgy Curtis players, which I'm afraid still remains very much a black mark over BFS). My enthusiasm for Yossi is more the fact that he's happy to include players with craft and little physicality, and to retain Noble as an excellent passer despite slight lack of athleticism. BFS seems to have got a decent blend of brain and brawn, and has got everyone working which speaks volumes about his ability to unite a team.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2012)

Yes, the Curtis stuff isn't good - could do without that (although probably wouldn't have got Carroll without it.)

I'm amazed that the 2 Daves deal with it.  They don't seem the types to let people dictate stuff about their companies.  There's obviously more going on than we know about.


----------



## mattie (Nov 12, 2012)

The Curtis stuff is a bit weird, but suspect the daves are happy to give a little leeway as long as it produces results.


----------



## hammerntongues (Nov 12, 2012)

= highest number of  clean sheets in the prem 
   highest number of bookings in the prem ( 27 )

both stats you wouldnt have seen against WHU before .


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2012)

and 9(?) of those bookings were from that weird game against QPR.

Have we really got the most clean sheets in the prem?


----------



## mattie (Nov 16, 2012)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20349923

Why the devil not.

Leaving aside the alarming knack England have of ruining our players.


----------



## tommers (Nov 16, 2012)

Yeah, he's done well this year.  Good range of passing, gets stuck in, good "engine".  Maybe a little bit slow but nobody's perfect.  He kind of looks like an average player but, in fact, his passing is really good.  He picks em out all the time.


----------



## Ponyutd (Nov 16, 2012)

To be fair, Ashton would now be playing for Tottenham or Man United if he hadn't been injured.


----------



## mattie (Nov 16, 2012)

He's mint.

He also looks a bit like Geoff Pike.








Eta:  I love that kit, btw.  Surely some Taiwanese sweatshop could start up making replica 70s and 80s skintight polyester kits?


----------



## tommers (Nov 16, 2012)

Ponyutd said:


> To be fair, Ashton would now be playing for Tottenham or Man United if he hadn't been injured.


 
Yeah, probably, but at least we would have got some money and a couple more years of him being brilliant.  I always wanted the Tevez / Ashton partnership.


----------



## mattie (Nov 16, 2012)

It might also have prevented David Nugent ever getting to claim his toe-poke from 6 inches counted as a goal for England.

eta:  Fucking look at it.  Shameless goalpoaching.  Runs like a zombie mannequin as well.


----------



## mattie (Nov 19, 2012)

Enjoy it, tommers?

Stoke really aren't he greatest to watch, thought we did a lot better when we tried to pass it than when we aimlessly launched it.  

And Charlie Adam did a great impersonation of an American footballer for their goal.


----------



## tommers (Nov 20, 2012)

Yeah, I did actually.  Well, I liked the 2nd half.  Mainly because, like you said, we stopped just trying to aim at Big Andy.  I quite liked some of the little passes around the area and we got behind them a couple of times.  Probably a fair result, they hit the bar and Jussi made a great save in the first half and we had a couple cleared off the line second half.  I thought their goal was brilliant by the way, even though Walters is quickly becoming one of my most hated footballers.  Don't like him, not sure why.  Maybe cos he always scores against us.

Anyway, not bad, 1-1 will do.  Stoke played well today (their counterattacking was really good at times) and we needed a kick up the arse from Big Sam before we started playing.

A bit annoyed that their goalkeeper was timewasting from the 28th minute on but you know... Stoke.


----------



## Ponyutd (Nov 20, 2012)

Andy was furious when taken off. Sam patted him on the back when he walked past. I would love to know what Andy's reply to that was....he wasn't happy I know that.
Completely different side in the second half. Odd how many times that happens.
Ethrington took some stick didn't he.


----------



## tommers (Nov 20, 2012)

I didn't see anything towards etherington really but I was in the east upper and it's very genteel up there.

Only just realised what the Adams comment was about. Typical stoke that.  Did it last time as well didn't they?


----------



## mattie (Nov 20, 2012)

I'm a bit surprised they get away with it, as Adam was just watching and blocking McCartney the whole time.  Still a decent finish though, and Nzonzi (I think?) hit a blinding drive off the bar.

Stoke do bore the tits off me though.  Although I do like Peter Crouch, even though he looks like a stretched spitfire pilot with that 'tashe.


----------



## tommers (Nov 20, 2012)

Did you watch it on the telly?  What was the consensus?  They were trying to sell it as battle of the hoofball.  There was certainly a bit of that from both teams, but there was some nice stuff too.


----------



## mattie (Nov 20, 2012)

tommers said:


> Did you watch it on the telly? What was the consensus? They were trying to sell it as battle of the hoofball. There was certainly a bit of that from both teams, but there was some nice stuff too.


 
I watched it in the gym with the TV sound down, so thankfully spared the usual inanities.

Also quite funny watching Andy Carroll gallop around the place to cheesy 80s disco music.

Our set-piece delivery was dreadful all game, and our long ball approach not much better - Carroll won net to nothing all game.  We looked so much better passing it about - even McCartney got in behind them a few times.  I thought O'Neil was off the pace, really could have done with Yossi going forward although it may have ended in tears defensively.


----------



## tommers (Nov 20, 2012)

Yeah, we suffered from the injuries.  Could have done with Jarvis and Yossi.  I thought Maiga showed signs of being alright but too often (especially first half) he gave the ball away or made the wrong choice.  Second half though, he combined really well with Linda and opened them up a few times.  Diame was his usual self, Nolan had a decent game, and the defence was pretty solid - Tomkins got man of the match but I thought Reid was much better, as usual.  Stoke are a good team, good, solid, mid table - I was happy with the draw tbh.

God knows what was going on with Noble's corners, though.  Absolutely atrocious.

And Carroll really does gallop, doesn't he?  Like a little horse.


----------



## mattie (Nov 20, 2012)

tommers said:


> Yeah, we suffered from the injuries. Could have done with Jarvis and Yossi. I thought Maiga showed signs of being alright but too often (especially first half) he gave the ball away or made the wrong choice. Second half though, he combined really well with Linda and opened them up a few times. Diame was his usual self, Nolan had a decent game, and the defence was pretty solid - Tomkins got man of the match but I thought Reid was much better, as usual. Stoke are a good team, good, solid, mid table - I was happy with the draw tbh.
> 
> God knows what was going on with Noble's corners, though. Absolutely atrocious.
> 
> And Carroll really does gallop, doesn't he? Like a little horse.


 
Yep, BFS was getting pretty animated when Noble hit the first defender for the umpteenth time.  The O'Neil had a go and I think it landed before it made the penalty box.

Andy's mane certainly helps with the illusion.


----------



## tommers (Nov 20, 2012)

> “I think at this level you need something different, and we’ve been working all week on it and we knew there was a gap there,’’ Adam told Sky Sports. “Fortunately it worked,” Pulis smiled. “We worked on it for two or three days in training but never scored a goal. I’m not supposed to say this but we obstructed a player.”


 
Stoke.



> West Ham’s passing football made a mockery of any lingering perception that Allardyce had imposed a direct style on his team.
> “Everyone’s enjoying what they are seeing at the moment, especially at Upton Park,’’ Allardyce said.


 
Us.

Moral Victory.


----------



## mattie (Nov 20, 2012)

If I were a linesman or referee, I'd give up watching the ball and just keep an eye on Stoke playing the opposition players.

A typical Stoke defensive tactic is to back in under opposition players jumping for the ball, and god knows how many times I saw Huth wrestling.  It's effective only as long as it's not penalised.  The sad thing is, I'm not sure they need do it - their first-up pressure was excellent and Huth et al were winning pretty much everything fairly contested in the air.  It's almost like Pulis takes pride in playing eyesore football.


----------



## chieftain (Nov 26, 2012)

Cheers chaps for both the easy win and the tasteful chanting 

As your Danny Dyer would say "pwoper class!"


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

Yep.  Not a good day.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Disappointing and annoying, on both counts.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Wor Andy scored at last.  About the only bright spot.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Nov 26, 2012)

apparently we were absolutely toss.  spence the spud reckons it was the worst display he'd seen this season and made them actually look good for a change.  his words.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

el-ahrairah said:


> apparently we were absolutely toss. spence the spud reckons it was the worst display he'd seen this season and made them actually look good for a change. his words.


 
I only caught a stream that looked like it was filmed through a bottle of David Bentley's hair gel, but we looked bad - not much going forward other than some speculative lumps, and we gave them far too much time and space.


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

I preferred to see it as they played well.  Defoe always plays well against us and we got Bale on a good day.  First half we limited them to long range before the goal but second half we had to leave some gaps and they filled em.  It was pretty one sided though, got to be said.  They just ran through us at times and our defending was pretty woeful for their goals.  Made a bit of a fist of it in the 2nd half but never looked like getting anything.

Hard games start here, if we can come out of em in reasonable shape then it's all good.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

I'd prefer to dull their victory as much as as I can.

Clint Dempsey looks like a crack whore.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Anyone know what the chanting was, btw?  Given reactions I expect it was at the fully nasty end of the spectrum, both offensive and further inflating the self-important bleatings of that lawyer idiot.

I was hope-hoping that any chanting might make fun of the fandango, rather than inflame it.


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

mattie said:


> Clint Dempsey looks like a crack whore.


 
He got that black eye off his pimp.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

tommers said:


> He got that black eye off his pimp.


 
Was it just me, or did he go cold-turkey space-eyes just before half time?


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

mattie said:


> Anyone know what the chanting was, btw? Given reactions I expect it was at the fully nasty end of the spectrum, both offensive and further inflating the self-important bleatings of that lawyer idiot.
> 
> I was hope-hoping that any chanting might make fun of the fandango, rather than inflame it.


 

Stuff about Lazio.  "Can we stab you every week?"  Something about Hitler coming for them   Reported gas noises (wouldn't be the first time.)

This is all off the papers, I wasn't there.  People on KUMB saying it did happen, but it was a minority - obviously the papers will ramp it up as much as they can.  Not needed whatever, and just makes things worse really.  Idiots.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

tommers said:


> Stuff about Lazio. "Can we stab you every week?" Something about Hitler coming for them  Reported gas noises (wouldn't be the first time.)
> 
> This is all off the papers, I wasn't there. People on KUMB saying it did happen, but it was a minority - obviously the papers will ramp it up as much as they can. Not needed whatever, and just makes things worse really. Idiots.


 
Credit to spuds for not retaliating in kind and singing songs about the blitz over the Docklands.

67 years, and apparently it never gets old.

At least the stabbing's topical, I suppose.  Nasty, but topical.


----------



## Corax (Nov 26, 2012)

tommers said:


> Stuff about Lazio. "Can we stab you every week?" Something about Hitler coming for them  Reported gas noises (wouldn't be the first time.)
> 
> This is all off the papers, I wasn't there. People on KUMB saying it did happen, but it was a minority - obviously the papers will ramp it up as much as they can. Not needed whatever, and just makes things worse really. Idiots.


The Torygraph have a series of articles on it.


> Four days after Ashley Mills and several other Spurs fans were beaten by a group of neo-Nazi thugs in a Rome bar, three days after Lazio ultras chanted “Juden Tottenham” at the Stadio Olimpico, West Ham fans shamed themselves, their team and the game with a series of increasingly nasty chants.
> They delighted in the blood that Mills and his companions shed in Rome. “Can we stab you every week?” they sang. Then, as the game drew to a conclusion, they played the race card.
> “Adolf Hitler, he’s coming for you,” they chanted. There were reports, too, of hissing: the racist’s time-honoured Holocaust taunt.


 


> Jonathan Liew, who was reporting the game, said the abuse was not limited to an isolated few.
> "A significant proportion of West Ham's travelling support participated. The press box at White Hart Lane is roughly 60 yards from the away end. The songs rang out loudly and clearly."


 
Jonathon Liew estimates the number involved being 'in the hundreds'. Also described it as 'an entire stand' at one point in this audio: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/sp...ic-abuse-at-Tottenham-at-White-Hart-Lane.html


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

Right. And lots of other people who were there say it was a minority and, for example, the hitler song was sung at the end and didn't last long.

I said, in the bit you even quoted, that papers would want to ramp it up.

What exactly do you want us to say? That we have some fucking idiots in our support? Already done that.  Or do you want to score some moral points? Have a few hundred.  Great stuff, I'm sure you all cried yourselves to sleep.


----------



## Corax (Nov 26, 2012)

tommers said:


> Right. And lots of other people who were there say it was a minority and, for example, the hitler song was sung at the end and didn't last long.
> 
> I said, in the bit you even quoted, that papers would want to ramp it up.
> 
> What exactly do you want us to say? That we have some fucking idiots in our support? Already done that. Or do you want to score some moral points? Have a few hundred. Great stuff, I'm sure you all cried yourselves to sleep.


Touchy.

I quoted the reports, which stand in contrast to the claims that it wasn't many people, not a big deal.  Take it up with the Telegraph.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

KUMB estimate the numbers involved as 0.7% of the away support.



I've emailed them requesting clarification of whether that's within 2 standard deviations of the average at White Hart Lane, but no reply as yet.

The club have stated life bans for the miscreants.  I reckon they should instead sentence them to Season Tickets at the Britannia Stadium.

How many life bans did spuds hand out for the sol chanting, btw?


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Corax said:


> Touchy.
> 
> I quoted the reports, which stand in contrast to the claims that it wasn't many people, not a big deal. Take it up with the Telegraph.


 
Yep, we noted the contrasting reports you also linked to, in the interests of balance.

Oh no.  Actually, we didn't.


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

A series of articles!


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

I wonder what Yossi makes of it all.


----------



## Corax (Nov 26, 2012)

tommers said:


> A series of articles!


Yes.  Seven.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Following on from above, I can confirm KUMB have got their finest boffins working on the problem. Well, they're still waiting for Big Pete to get back from fixing that dodgy sink, but in the meantime:


*White Hart Lane: the truth*

Number of individuals estimated to have sung 'Forza/Viva Lazio' chant: ½-¾ (50-75%)

Number of individuals estimated to have sung Hitler-related chant: 20-30 (0.07%)

Number of individuals estimated to have made 'hissing' noises: negligible (if any)

_* Research involved personal accounts of around 25 fans (and rising) present at the game. Figures in parentheses refer to total away allocation of 2,800._
Read more at http://www.kumb.com/story.php?id=126565#wzUAtG0cpv0PxzSv.99


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

I'll keep you informed as more West Ham fans respond/sober up.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

We need to find a spuds song that isn't offensive.  Well, isn't offensive to the world at large.  As offensive as humanly possible to spuds fans.

Any topics?


----------



## Corax (Nov 26, 2012)

I'm glad to hear that because KUMB says it wasn't that really that many people, and because Spurs have some homophobic cunts in their ranks, it's all okay.  That's good.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Corax said:


> I'm glad to hear that because KUMB says it wasn't that really that many people, and because Spurs have some homophobic cunts in their ranks, it's all okay. That's good.


 
I'm not sure how you reached that conclusion.  But who knows how you spuds think.


----------



## Corax (Nov 26, 2012)

To the credit of KUMB, there are plenty on there recognising that it was a significant number, that they were throwing nazi salutes, and so on - and condemning it.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Corax said:


> To the credit of KUMB, there are plenty on there recognising that it was a significant number, that they were throwing nazi salutes, and so on - and condemning it.


 
I think everyone's condemned it, unless I'm missing something.


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

I've done it twice.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

Maybe the spuds think you've undone it.


----------



## mattie (Nov 26, 2012)

It begins:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20492168

Matey has been banned, and has accepted a police caution.  

Not entirely sure about some of those statements - 



> Tottenham Supporters' Trust chairman Bernie Kingsley said: "There are an awful lot of decent people who go to watch West Ham and it is unfair to punish the majority of supporters [by playing games behind closed doors] for an act undertaken by a relatively small number.
> "The much easier solution would be to reduce the allocations or not allow supporters from those clubs to go to away games."


 
How does reducing the allocation not punish the majority of supporters for the actions of a few?


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

That's the chairman of the Tottenham Supporters' Trust there, saying it was a "relatively small number."

Meanwhile the Telegraph are running seven articles about it.

Then again he might not be the best source as he seems to be suffering from a total lack of logic. 



> A separate complaint about the alleged abusive chanting was also made to police on Monday, the chairman of the Society of Black Lawyers Peter Herbert told Sky Sports News.




I was wondering when he'd pop up.


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

mattie said:


> I wonder what Yossi makes of it all.


 
He's not happy.

http://www.kumb.com/story.php?id=126566


----------



## Corax (Nov 26, 2012)

Interesting follow up story here.


----------



## sleaterkinney (Nov 26, 2012)

Hands off Suarez!


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2012)

sleaterkinney said:


> Hands off Suarez!



Genuine lol.


----------



## Ponyutd (Nov 27, 2012)

Via Twitter....Yasser Arafat's remains have been exhumed for a medical. If he passes it he WILL join QPR on loan till end of season -Rednapp.


----------



## mattie (Nov 28, 2012)

Man U tonight.

Noble suspended, so expect even more copious long balls.


----------



## tommers (Nov 28, 2012)

Workmanlike. I think that will be the word of today.


----------



## tommers (Nov 28, 2012)

Bastard.  After the early goal I thought we were in for a night but I thought we did brilliantly.  limited them to not much and had a couple of chances ourselves to get a point.  I'm actually a bit pissed off we didn't, and never thought I'd say that.

Chelsea next.


----------



## mattie (Dec 1, 2012)

It was a pretty spawny goal as well.  Not sure Van Persie meant that dummy/flick, and the deflection was cruel.


----------



## tommers (Dec 1, 2012)

Hahahahahahahahahahaha!  I'm sat in front of a dodgy stream with the 4 month old and the rest of the family asleep.  I have to be very, very quiet.  It's fucking difficult.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  Up yours you fucking chelsea CUNTS!


----------



## TruXta (Dec 1, 2012)




----------



## tommers (Dec 1, 2012)

I think that 2nd half performance was maybe the best I have seen us play.  Certainly this year.  Brilliant, absolutely brilliant.


----------



## tommers (Dec 1, 2012)




----------



## Corax (Dec 1, 2012)

tommers said:


>


Was that given?


----------



## tommers (Dec 1, 2012)

yep. The ref (for once) didn't fall for their little tricks.

He did disallow a perfectly good Nolan goal in the first half.

Carlton Goal.


----------



## tommers (Dec 1, 2012)

*Wipes away a manly tear*


----------



## mattie (Dec 1, 2012)

England beat NZ.  West Ham beat Chelsea.  What a day.


----------



## Ponyutd (Dec 1, 2012)

Champions League...your 'aving a laugh.

Ohh the unconfined joy of picking them apart was brilliant. To the wanker Chels*a fan on the train "well it's their cup final ain't it" have you stopped crying yet?


----------



## The39thStep (Dec 2, 2012)

Tommers, at the Manchester do I was talking to steph who turns out to be a bit of a Hammers fan .


----------



## tommers (Dec 2, 2012)

Yeah, she doesn't post much about it but has done in the past (sometime).

When was this (i.e did she have a chance to discuss our glorious victory)?


----------



## The39thStep (Dec 2, 2012)

tommers said:


> Yeah, she doesn't post much about it but has done in the past (sometime).
> 
> When was this (i.e did she have a chance to discuss our glorious victory)?


 
Saturday about 3 0 clock , I didn't feel it was an important topic so we didn't discuss it.


----------



## stethoscope (Dec 2, 2012)




----------



## mattie (Dec 3, 2012)

Man U in cup.  At UP.

Not as terrified by that thought as in previous seasons.


----------



## mattie (Dec 3, 2012)

Oh, and we're on the box for the next few weeks - Liverpool and West Brom.

West Brom could be a good game, they've been playing some pretty decent stuff.


----------



## tommers (Dec 3, 2012)

Don't Man U play their 2nd team in this?  Then again, BFS has never really shown any appetite for it either.  It'll be a good day, whatever.


----------



## mattie (Dec 4, 2012)

tommers said:


> Don't Man U play their 2nd team in this? Then again, BFS has never really shown any appetite for it either. It'll be a good day, whatever.


 
Are you mixing the FA Cup up with the League Cup? I thought Taggart generally takes this pretty seriously.

Oh, and this should upset Bazza Hearn, assuming he hasn't yet been paid to piss off out of it:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/dec/04/west-ham-olympic-stadium-deal




> Meanwhile, the film director Danny Boyle has added his name to the list of those backing West Ham's bid to rent the stadium on a 99-year lease. Boyle said in his director's commentary for the BBC's Opening Ceremony DVD that he included a sequence featuring I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles because he hoped they would move in.
> "We had to have the West Ham song because I think they should get the stadium. It would be wonderful. I hope the park is made into a big success by the fact the onus is on them now to keep investing and to keep it working because people love it," he said.


 
Eta: Wor Andy in the wars:
http://www.football365.com/news/21554/8307836/Hammers-Party-Gets-Lively-Police-Question-Carroll

Chrimbo party in Dublin.  I've no idea why.


----------



## mattie (Dec 4, 2012)

Anyone else notice the rousing chorus of Stick the Blue Flag Up Your Arse after the 3rd went in on the MOTD highlights?


----------



## tommers (Dec 4, 2012)

I thought that was why Bubbles was in there.  I like the man even more now.  

I'm encouraged by the whole Olympic stadium thing.  They're basically arguing over the cost of retractable seating.  If they can do it right then it could be really good... although I did think that it would be a shame to leave the Boleyn when I was there the other day.

Wasn't there that big furore a while ago (could have been quite a while ago actually) about Man Utd putting out a 2nd team in the FA Cup?  Or they didn't play in it or something?  I'm clutching at straws, essentially.


----------



## Sweet FA (Dec 5, 2012)

tommers said:


> Wasn't there that big furore a while ago (could have been quite a while ago actually) about Man Utd putting out a 2nd team in the FA Cup? Or they didn't play in it or something? I'm clutching at straws, essentially.


They knobbed it off to play in the World Club Championship. I can't remember exact details but I think the FA let them as they thought it'd be good for our World Cup bid.

eta some details here


----------



## tommers (Dec 5, 2012)

Sweet FA said:


> They knobbed it off to play in the World Club Championship. I can't remember exact details but I think the FA let them as they thought it'd be good for our World Cup bid.
> 
> eta some details here


 

Ah right.  1999.


----------



## Sweet FA (Dec 5, 2012)

Historical precedent; we can hope 

Just got tickets for Norwich on NY's Day; not entirely sure it's a good idea but been roped in for nephew duty via kids/quid. Hopefully hangover will have eased by 3...


----------



## hammerntongues (Dec 5, 2012)

The last time they came to UP for a cup game we beat them 4-0 in LC Qtrs in a  thick snowstorm  , a double for Spector who miraculously morphed into Parker , what a night . 5.15 KO , its going to get messy , 6000 Reds all on the beer for several hours , what are they thinking , I see trouble ahead .................

COYI


----------



## tommers (Dec 5, 2012)

That was the night when Carlton, with his big head steaming in the cold and beaming from ear to ear, told the interviewer that he was "over-chuffed".

Brilliant night, Spector was unplayable.  Bizarre.


----------



## tommers (Dec 5, 2012)

Preferred bidders...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/olympics/20611708


----------



## tommers (Dec 9, 2012)

Fucking cocknuggets.

That is all.

And Diame out.  What's that?  A month or something?  They're racking up.


----------



## tommers (Dec 9, 2012)

Make that 6-10 weeks.   Fucker.


----------



## TruXta (Dec 9, 2012)

Big loss for you, he bossed the midfield until the injury.


----------



## goldenecitrone (Dec 9, 2012)

Sweet FA said:


> Historical precedent; we can hope
> 
> Just got tickets for Norwich on NY's Day; not entirely sure it's a good idea but been roped in for nephew duty via kids/quid. Hopefully hangover will have eased by 3...


 
Didn't know you were a Hammers fan. Cracking game today.


----------



## tommers (Dec 9, 2012)

Yeah, you're not wrong. I flagged him as one of the buys of the season and he's certainly mostly lived up to that so far. Big loss. Let's hope BFS doesn't persist with Tomkins in midfield instead. He doesn't do well there.

We have actually got Alou Diarra to play that role, but he's been injured since he arrived.

Still Carroll and Diame will both be like new signings once they've got fit, ready for the last 2 months of the season.   Along with Benayoun and Vaz Te.

This happens to us every year.


----------



## mattie (Dec 9, 2012)

Without wishing to sound too callous, why is it never the hoofers who get injured?


----------



## Ponyutd (Dec 10, 2012)

Out for three months. Sickening!


----------



## el-ahrairah (Dec 10, 2012)

we should have won that.


----------



## stethoscope (Dec 10, 2012)

Disappointing result - we worked really hard and dominated for most of it.

And Diame out for 3 months


----------



## tommers (Dec 10, 2012)

Diame now said to be out for 3 weeks.

Phew / just in time for the january transfer window.


----------



## hammerntongues (Dec 11, 2012)

At this rate  he will turn out against WBA the man is super-human .


----------



## goldenecitrone (Dec 11, 2012)

el-ahrairah said:


> we should have won that.


 
If you'd managed to score two more goals, you could well have.


----------



## devonshire (Dec 11, 2012)

goldenecitrone said:


> If you'd managed to score two more goals, you could well have.


 
Or conceded two less..


----------



## tommers (Dec 12, 2012)

Wally Downes has left.  Strange one.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Dec 13, 2012)

Oh god, Fatty isn't boffing his wife is he?


----------



## tommers (Dec 13, 2012)

God knows.  Nobody seems to know why he left, or even if he resigned or was sacked.

He seemed to be doing a good job.  I follow him on twitter and there was nothing there about him planning to leave or anything.  Weird one.


----------



## mattie (Dec 13, 2012)

Eh?







West Ham in the Simpsons?  Are we really that bloody cartoonish now?

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20121211/hammers-feature-in-the-simpsons_2236884_3006758


----------



## tommers (Dec 16, 2012)

Respect the point.


----------



## bluestreak (Dec 16, 2012)

a point against west brom this season is not to be sniffed at.  did anyone watch the game?


----------



## tommers (Dec 16, 2012)

Nah, I was stuck in a car park in Bromley for most of the 2nd half, could just about hear the commentary through all the crackling.  They seemed to be on top for most of the 2nd but we held out manfully as we do these days.


----------



## The39thStep (Dec 20, 2012)

I know you lot will know this but I didn't. Love the last sentence.



> *John Charles*
> 
> *John Charles - Canning Town football hero and the first black player to represent England *
> 
> ...


----------



## tommers (Dec 20, 2012)

I didn't know that, actually. I always thought Clyde Best was our first black player but there you go. As far as I can see they only ever played once together... 2 all draw with Leeds on 02/04/70. Wonder if that was the first time an English team fielded 2 black players in the same team? From reading up about him he finished playing cos of his hamstrings - pretty regular for a couple of seasons and then a sudden stop. 

That article is a bit inaccurate.. I suppose he was technically a member of the 64 & 65 squads, but he only played 3 times total in those 2 seasons (he did play in Europe 4 times in 65-66 though.) According to Wiki he tripled his footballer's wage when he started the stall 

http://www.westhamstats.info/westham.php?west=2&ham=129&united=John_Charles

And nice biography here... 

http://www.spartacus.schoolnet.co.uk/WHcharlesJ2.htm

Incidentally, I looked at Laurie Cunningham's wiki page...



> He joined West Bromwich Albion in 1977, where, under manager Johnny Giles, he teamed up with another black player, Cyrille Regis, and the following year (under Ron Atkinson) with Brendon Batson. This was the first time an English team simultaneously fielded three black players, and Atkinson collectively referred to Cunningham, Batson and Regis as 'The Three Degrees' after the legendary U.S. soul singing trio.


 
 Good old Ron.


----------



## agricola (Dec 22, 2012)

How bad was that ref?


----------



## tommers (Dec 22, 2012)

I am absolutely fucking fuming.  What a total cunt.  Unbelievable, probably the worst I have ever seen.  Completely ruined the game, which i was enjoying.

Wanker.  I wish various things involving tropical diseases that would probably get me banned.   

(i hope this baby I'm holding can't read.)


----------



## tommers (Dec 22, 2012)

As Allardyce correctly says, if you remember that Anichebe kicked Collins in the head after 32 mins and _didn't even get a foul given against him_ then you see just how much of a fucking waste of fucking skin that stupid baldy wanker of a ref is.

Myself? I thought Sam was a bit harsh with the second bit but you know, he's a powerful man.


----------



## tommers (Dec 29, 2012)

Christ, I hate Reading.


----------



## mattie (Dec 29, 2012)

Not even a mother could love Reading.


----------



## tommers (Dec 29, 2012)

They don't have mothers, they were wetnursed by hyenas.

That's 3 times they've done that now.


----------



## mattie (Dec 30, 2012)

Pretty bad-tempered game.  

Which, of course, meant that little bastard Noel Hunt had to come on as sub.


----------



## mattie (Dec 30, 2012)

Anyway, onwards and upwards.  Norwich could prove a toughie, especially given suspensions.


----------



## bluestreak (Dec 30, 2012)

does anyone like reading?  as i understand it they're everyone's bogey team but they can't possibly be.


----------



## Ponyutd (Dec 30, 2012)

That's two wins in ten games now. Five defeats in that lot as well, I'm getting a little concerned.


----------



## tommers (Dec 30, 2012)

Yeah sure, but they have been ten difficult games.  Those losses were who - man utd, everton, Liverpool, spurs and reading? Really only reading that's even slightly unexpected.  Wins at Newcastle and home to Chelsea... and who were the draws? Stoke at home, wba away and I've forgotten the last one.  Was it man city?

We've just had some tough games.  And lots of injuries. I reckon to avoid relegation you need a point a game and we've taken 9 from those 10, and that's probably our hardest spell this season.


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 1, 2013)

We have suffered a loss in form that is worrying. We have got to show a reversal in that. We are currently showing form of relegation certainties. We've had tough games I agree...but we have tough games coming up. Teams fancy it against us. And I can see why. Small squad isn't helping...and we lack quality.
We could end up in the mire with this run. We are 5 or 6 points of the bottom third team, Southampton.
Like I say, I'm worried.


----------



## Gingerman (Jan 2, 2013)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20893195
Blimey...thought Bagpuss would be in for him.


----------



## tommers (Jan 2, 2013)

Yeah, just seen that.  I know he's lost his form (altho he was alright in France last year by all accounts) but I was there when he signed his pro forms on the pitch at the Boleyn and I would love it if he turned it on for us.

Big Sam is the only thing that makes me think it might happen, and I'd still put the chances at 80% that he'll be injured all the time but you've got to have a dream haven't you?


----------



## tommers (Jan 2, 2013)

Rodgers is on the liverpool site saying we're talking to Cole.  Bungpuss has said we nicked him from under his nose... this might actually be happening...


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

Oh fuck it. I'm going to give in. "He's coming home, he's coming, joey's coming home!"







Apparently at the ground today training with the rest of the squad.


----------



## imposs1904 (Jan 3, 2013)

tommers said:


> Oh fuck it. I'm going to give in. "He's coming home, he's coming, joey's coming home!"
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 
Lampard next?


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

imposs1904 said:


> Lampard next?


 
Booooooooo!!!!


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 3, 2013)

Just thinking, we seem to sell and buy back quite a few players. Dicks, Cottee, McAvenie, Dowie, Cole, Pop Robson (who I loved watching)...any more?


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Just thinking, we seem to sell and buy back quite a few players. Dicks, Cottee, McAvenie, Dowie, Cole, Pop Robson (who I loved watching)...any more?


 
Yossi I suppose.  Did we buy Dowie back?  I've obviously wiped that from my memory.  Hutchinson.


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 3, 2013)

Of course Yossi. We deffo bought Dowie back. One of the classic lines of all time from Redknapp involved Dowie. He scored a peach of an own goal, can't remember who against.
Redknapp was asked about it in the post match and said "It was my fault really, I didn't tell anyone to mark him."


----------



## Balbi (Jan 3, 2013)

Shame it took him a decade to get back to the last place he was actually good


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Of course Yossi. We deffo bought Dowie back. One of the classic lines of all time from Redknapp involved Dowie. He scored a peach of an own goal, can't remember who against.
> Redknapp was asked about it in the post match and said "It was my fault really, I didn't tell anyone to mark him."


 
I was at that game.  2-1 defeat to Stockport.  Away end uncovered.  Pissing rain.  Hordes of little Manc scrotes celebrating as we trudged home.  Great evening.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

Balbi said:


> Shame it took him a decade to get back to the last place he was actually good


 
Yeah, he'll have trouble getting into our team past all the other players with 50 caps for England who have won the PL title 3 times.

He hasn't fitted in to Liverpool.  He was good at Chelsea, even if he had to get rid of all the tricks and shit.  He played 40 odd times for Lille last season.  It's a bit of a gamble.  Or at least it would be if we'd paid anything for him and was giving him massive wages (which we aren't.)

If he's shit then he's shit.  Sam'll get the best out of him, the English Djorkaeff!!


----------



## The39thStep (Jan 3, 2013)

Hope he scores another like this against United at the weekend


----------



## Big Gunz (Jan 3, 2013)

I didn't think Joe got a fair crack of the whip but I suppose Liverpool wanted him off their wage bill.  Good luck to the guy, he did show glimpses of what he could do in the few games he played this season.  Definitely not past it.


----------



## mattie (Jan 3, 2013)

I remember Joey Cole being made Captain during Roeder's unfortunate reign, being one of the few players who gave a shit.

As an aside, have we just bungpussed bungpuss?  BFS, legend.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

mattie said:


> I remember Joey Cole being made Captain during Roeder's unfortunate reign, being one of the few players who gave a shit.
> 
> As an aside, have we just bungpussed bungpuss? BFS, legend.


 
yep!  Apparently Joey was his "only target".  yeah right, but


----------



## mattie (Jan 3, 2013)

There's talk of Yossi leaving - was his deal only until Jan?

Anyway, interesting to see how we might line up.  Assume JC would play wide right, not a bad midfield with him, Jarvis, Noble and Diame, and Collison.  Keen to see if BFS would countenance playing him behind Cole/Carroll, which would knock Nolan put of position a bit.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

Yeah Yossi has gone.  It was a season long loan but he didn't really do much and I think his injury was taking longer than thought.

I'm guessing JC will play on the right.  No way will Nolan be dropped.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)




----------



## mattie (Jan 3, 2013)

Shame about Yossi, not exactly up with Berkovic in terms of ability but better than many of the workhorses we've had over the years.

Also heard that Maiga might go, and Liverpool sniffing around Reid.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

mattie said:


> Shame about Yossi, not exactly up with Berkovic in terms of ability but better than many of the workhorses we've had over the years.
> 
> Also heard that Maiga might go, and Liverpool sniffing around Reid.


 
Yeah, Maiga is a strange one.  He's done alright I thought but doesn't seem to be being given a chance.  I think he's suffered cos he's not a wide man but also can't play the Cole / Carroll role (or at least BFS doesn't seem to think he can.)  So... why sign him in the first place?

No way Reid will be leaving.  He's been our best player.  Well, unless this thing with JC is just to butter us up.


----------



## Balbi (Jan 3, 2013)

tommers said:


> Yeah, he'll have trouble getting into our team past all the other players with 50 caps for England who have won the PL title 3 times.
> 
> He hasn't fitted in to Liverpool. He was good at Chelsea, even if he had to get rid of all the tricks and shit. He played 40 odd times for Lille last season. It's a bit of a gamble. Or at least it would be if we'd paid anything for him and was giving him massive wages (which we aren't.)
> 
> If he's shit then he's shit. Sam'll get the best out of him, the English Djorkaeff!!


 
He was good enough - but not, you know, _that_ Joey Cole. Premier league standard, and a high standard at that, but - you know, not _that_ Cole. The one we saw bits of in the last decade.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

Balbi said:


> He was good enough - but not, you know, _that_ Joey Cole. Premier league standard, and a high standard at that, but - you know, not _that_ Cole. The one we saw bits of in the last decade.


 
He'll probably never be that again.   I was so excited when he signed his contract and then he got mourinhoed at Chelsea.  Probably made him more effective, but a lot less exciting.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

It is hilarious that Liverpool are still paying him £50k/week.

Who'd be a footballer?


----------



## Balbi (Jan 3, 2013)

Does highlight a glaring omission in Mourinho's special armour - he's never developed a player properly. It's all team work, and little individual brilliance.


----------



## mattie (Jan 3, 2013)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20905628

Upgrade on Maiga?


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

I guess so.  We wanted him a while ago didn't we?  Not really seen him tbh.


----------



## tommers (Jan 3, 2013)

Little jack Sullivan says JC has signed.


----------



## tommers (Jan 4, 2013)

Official.

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20130104/cole-comes-home_2236884_3027456


----------



## TruXta (Jan 4, 2013)

Good luck to him, alway had a soft spot for the little bugger even if his contributions to LFC were far and few between.


----------



## tommers (Jan 4, 2013)

Starts tomorrow apparently. 

Could be interesting.


----------



## Balbi (Jan 4, 2013)

A 31 year old with flashes of inspiration, won a few titles and cups, goes to West Ham and plays Man Utd.

 

I've read this one before.


----------



## tommers (Jan 4, 2013)

More from Jack Sullivan...

I am very sorry about this news Chamakh has sign a 6 month loan deal! not my pick

 Not the greatest diplomacy skills.

Anelka also at the training ground apparently.

God knows what is going on.


----------



## Yelkcub (Jan 4, 2013)




----------



## tommers (Jan 4, 2013)

Guess who.



> Diame's a good player. You would love to have him here but he belongs to West Ham. Until the club decide they want to sell him for £3.5m, I don't know how it works.


----------



## tommers (Jan 4, 2013)

Chamakh official...

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20130104/hammers-loan-chamakh_2236884_3030556


----------



## el-ahrairah (Jan 4, 2013)

christ.  how many more strikers who can't score do we actually need?


----------



## tommers (Jan 4, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> christ. how many more strikers who can't score do we actually need?


 
Carlton is a bona fide west ham legend and can stay forever, but his knees are fucked and he struggles with 90 mins a week.
Carroll is injured for another month.

Maiga is off to the African Nations / another club.

There is nobody else.  Oh, apart from Piquionne.  Forgot about him.


----------



## mattie (Jan 5, 2013)

We've got a young Irish striker and a young shackle-dragger striker who came on for a good 30 seconds in some cup game we lost, and I suppose Vaz Te could play up top.

And Kevin Nolan, who seems to want to be a striker at the moment.


----------



## chieftain (Jan 5, 2013)

Joe Cole wonder goal - you have to be pleased he's backs lads


----------



## tommers (Jan 5, 2013)

mattie said:


> a young shackle-dragger striker who came on for a good 30 seconds in some cup game.



Who's that?


----------



## mattie (Jan 5, 2013)

tommers said:


> Who's that?


 
Dylan Tombides.

Poor sod contracted cancer of the crackers but is thankfully over it.


----------



## tommers (Jan 5, 2013)

Good cup tie this.  Thought we came into it more and more the further it went.  Joe Cole's done well, created a few chances and impressed with Diarra and Carlton (again.)  They're so dangerous on the break but we'll see what happens.  We're not getting outclassed and maybe some people are revising their opinion of BFS' tactics.


----------



## Badgers (Jan 5, 2013)

My word


----------



## Voley (Jan 5, 2013)

Great header that left De Gea standing.


----------



## Balbi (Jan 5, 2013)

Two goals? I should *Co*le *Co*llins.


----------



## twentythreedom (Jan 5, 2013)

Van Persie is a cunt btw


----------



## Lord Camomile (Jan 5, 2013)

Both those balls for the goals came from outside the area. Travelled a pretty long way.

Jus' sayin'...


----------



## tommers (Jan 5, 2013)

Well done Joe Cole.  Brilliant performance.


----------



## Balbi (Jan 5, 2013)

Jesus christ robin van persie - you just don't stop him


----------



## twentythreedom (Jan 5, 2013)

twentythreedom said:


> Van Persie is a cunt btw


Told ya


----------



## Lord Camomile (Jan 5, 2013)

Brilliant from Man Utd there, playing it out from the back.


----------



## Balbi (Jan 5, 2013)

Long ball from giggs - pfft, united.


----------



## Voley (Jan 5, 2013)

Hard luck, hammers. Really deserved to win that.


----------



## tommers (Jan 5, 2013)

Fucking jammy wankers.  Every fucking time.  Cunts.


----------



## Deareg (Jan 5, 2013)

tommers said:


> Fucking jammy wankers. Every fucking time. Cunts.


Yeah that's what it is, jammyness.


----------



## tommers (Jan 5, 2013)

That Dutch cunt is too good.  Always knew it was coming.  At half time I thought "we'll probably get a goal, get a little bit of hope and then they'll win it in the last 5 mins" cos they always fucking do.  And then, even when that was happening I still couldn't stop getting a little bit of hope going and when it got to 90 mins I actually started thinking we might do this and then, of course, they fucking score.  Every fucking time.  I'm angry with myself really.


----------



## Deareg (Jan 5, 2013)

I actually told my son in law before the game I thought we were going to lose 2-1.


----------



## tommers (Jan 5, 2013)

Right, calmed down now.  Positives to take from that... Joe bloody Cole - great (second) debut.  Set up both goals and looked like exactly what we need; quick, tidy and creating chances.  If he can continue like that and stay injury free then we're going to have another proper cult hero on our hands.  Warms the cockles.

And Diarra - out for the past 6 months, comes back and doesn't put a foot wrong.  Looks like he could be a great defensive midfielder for the rest of the season and brilliant that he's fit again.

I think we can look forward to the rest of the season - if we can get everybody fit then we're going to be a handful.


----------



## tommers (Jan 6, 2013)

Some Brazilian striker signing on another 6 month loan. Wellington Paulista is the name. Doesn't look great tbh.


----------



## The39thStep (Jan 6, 2013)

Lord Camomile said:


> Brilliant from Man Utd there, playing it out from the back.


 
Coles two assists were the moments of brilliance.


----------



## mattie (Jan 6, 2013)

JC looked good, and he looked eager.

How long til he gets injured.

Collins with two great heads, JC with two great deliveries for the goals.  Their second was pretty damn good, although Tomkins got caught and didn't even get a challenge in.


----------



## tommers (Jan 6, 2013)

mattie said:


> JC looked good, and he looked eager.
> 
> How long til he gets injured.
> 
> Collins with two great heads, JC with two great deliveries for the goals.  Their second was pretty damn good, although Tomkins got caught and didn't even get a challenge in.



Yeah I watched that and basically he was wrong footed by van persie's first touch.   He wasn't expecting it to be as good as it was and then he was the wrong side of him.


----------



## Kanda (Jan 7, 2013)

tommers said:


> Fucking jammy wankers. Every fucking time. Cunts.


 
You knocked them out of the cup 4-0 last year!

Was at the game, thought it was a good game.


----------



## tommers (Jan 7, 2013)

Kanda said:


> You knocked them out of the cup 4-0 last year!
> 
> Was at the game, thought it was a good game.


 
League Cup! And it was the year before last. And that was some kind of weird anomaly, Spector was unplayable. Jonathan Spector! 

It (Saturday) was a good match, great cup tie I thought. Were you in with the Man Utd fans?


----------



## Kanda (Jan 7, 2013)

tommers said:


> League Cup! And it was the year before last. And that was some kind of weird anomaly, Spector was unplayable. Jonathan Spector! Great night though, unbelievable. When Carlton stuck his big ugly mug into the camera, with his head steaming and a massive grin, telling everybody he was "overchuffed" was when he could no longer do any wrong.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 
No, my company has a Box at the ground.


----------



## tommers (Jan 7, 2013)

That's interesting. 

I got Carlton's reaction confused with the Birmingham semi.


----------



## tommers (Jan 8, 2013)

Blackburn Rovers Offical Site said:
			
		

> Sam Allardyce: An apology
> 
> During the summer of 2011, Mr Steve Kean was this Club’s manager and accompanied the players of Blackburn Rovers on a pre-season tour of the Far East.
> 
> ...


----------



## tommers (Jan 8, 2013)

Oh and Wellington has signed a 6 month loan, with "a view" to a 3 year deal - subject to medical.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Jan 8, 2013)

sicknote dyer has had his contract cancelled at qpr.  how unexpected.


----------



## tommers (Jan 8, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> sicknote dyer has had his contract cancelled at qpr.  how unexpected.



 what a shock.  Surely that's it now?


----------



## Balbi (Jan 8, 2013)

tommers said:


>



So only half of the Allardyce boys are crooks.


----------



## tommers (Jan 12, 2013)

Team for today...
jussi, potts jnr, demel, ginger pele, reid, collison, nolan, diarra, jarvis, joey, carlton.

Diame is on the bench.   No noble for some reason.


----------



## tommers (Jan 13, 2013)

Joey O'Brien has signed a new 3 1/2 year contract.  Cult hero.

There was no game yesterday.  None at all.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Jan 13, 2013)

was it as bad as reports suggest?


----------



## tommers (Jan 13, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> was it as bad as reports suggest?


 
I was at work so I didn't see it but it sounded pretty terrible.  We made Sunderland look good.  That's difficult to do.


----------



## mattie (Jan 14, 2013)

From here on in, I'm vetoing all match reports, streams, Match of the day segments and radio commentary for all West Ham away games.

Except possibly for Wednesday.


----------



## tommers (Jan 15, 2013)

I don't think it's going to be pretty.


----------



## mattie (Jan 15, 2013)

On the bright side, we may set some new records.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 16, 2013)

West Ham 10 - 1  to win after  90 mins ,  25/1  to win   2 - 1    and 28/1 to win  1 - 0

A fool and his money ........................


----------



## tommers (Jan 16, 2013)

10/1 has to be decent odds though.   Depends on what teams we both pick.  If Man Utd pick their first team then we're screwed.  In fact, even if they pick their second team then we probably are, but we might get something.



Maybe.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 16, 2013)

I think we are fucked regardless but cannot resist a 10 -1 , we had our chance in the 1st leg , QPR on Saturday is going to take preference for sure . I have a feeling that we will be resting a few , hopefully Noble plays , he is the kind of player you do not know how much he does until he is not in the team , Sunderland being an example . A chance for Sam to play 2 up front maybe ? Cole and Vaz ? no one is expecting much so we have to take the game to them .


----------



## tommers (Jan 16, 2013)

Well he said we only have 3 fit defenders.  Demel's fit though isn't he?  So we've got Tomkins, Reid, Demel and Potts?  Maybe he's not counting Potts who has been chucked in at the deep end a bit.

Diame's getting 45 mins apparently... so maybe jussi, demel, jt, reid, potts, jarvis, noble, j cole, diarra, and then either nolan or vaz te or somebody.  I'd like him to play 2 up front but I reckon he'll try to limit the damage and then go for it a bit in the 2nd if possible.


----------



## tommers (Jan 16, 2013)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2013/jan/15/manchester-united-wayne-rooney-west-ham

Man Utd are suffering injury problems of their own so will have to draft in Rooney and Nani. 




			
				Sam said:
			
		

> "We'll have to take a big look at the squad and try to plan a different way of playing as well as a team that's going to be quite different, based on the number of injuries I've got and the big game we've got on Saturday as well."


 
Maybe you're right then.


----------



## tommers (Jan 16, 2013)

We do like to give a team as headstart.


----------



## mattie (Jan 19, 2013)

Motty's been at the brandy again:



> Notwithstanding the excellent record Redknapp has against West Ham since he left - eight wins, three draws and one defeat - *Hammers fans hold him in high regard.* The club consistently did well under him and achieved their highest-ever Premier League finish: fifth in 1999. *Those years stir affection, so I expect he'll get a good reception at Upton Park.*


 
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20996519


----------



## tommers (Jan 19, 2013)

Ah. Must be a nice world he lives in.


----------



## mattie (Jan 19, 2013)

FFS.

That was rubbish.


----------



## tommers (Jan 19, 2013)

Well, that was predictable.  And we've got nothing off Webb that half.


----------



## mattie (Jan 19, 2013)

Joseph Cole.

Joseph John Cole.


----------



## tommers (Jan 19, 2013)

Li'l Joey Cole.  

We should have won that.  Easily.


----------



## mattie (Jan 20, 2013)

Cesar made a few decent saves, but we seemed to pick him out a bit too frequently - I think is maybe a function of BFS' tactic of bombing the area rather than picking out a man, making it the challenge just to get on the end of a cross rather than pick a spot.

Encouraging signs, but usual fuck-up to give them an opening (admittedly, a well-built and finished opening) despite two or three warnings beforehand.

Not sure Remy is enough for QPR - I'd have thought any club who can offer Shaun Derry a starting spot would struggle in the PL.  Taraabt looked good on the ball, but they need more from him and more than just him.


----------



## tommers (Jan 20, 2013)

Didn't they clear it off the line a couple of times too? Tbh all the omens were an away win so I was pretty happy with a draw.  We should have won it easily tho.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 21, 2013)

We actually played very well , we seem to be having too many " one of those games " though , I don`t want to settle for mid-table mediocrity but for now its good enough , lets save our luck for Wednesday night . A fit Diame and Noble back makes all the difference , there is still optimism before every game .


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 23, 2013)

Diame off? What a charmer he sounds


----------



## tommers (Jan 23, 2013)

Typical stuff really. Can't begrudge him getting a better job but it's a bit annoying that he's only been here 5 mins and probably only played about 10-15 games. Funny that Arsenal didn't want to buy him in the Summer, after he'd been dropped by Wigan, isn't it?

Diarra's the more annoying one. He's been out injured for 3 months and has only been fit for 3 games (and he's played in each) before moaning that he's being "forced out". That's just bizarre.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 23, 2013)

Hope Diame is shit tonight but not before he takes out Walcott for the game , Wenger says it was unprofessional and we get to keep him . Sadly I have a feeling Diame will play a blinder but we will still lose and Wenger signs him straight after the game . I dont hold out much hope for tonight I suppose it is a game to nothing . No smoke without fire but I am hoping the Diarra paper-talk is just that ,  papertalk , if Diame is off we will need Diarra and he will def get his 90 mins each week .

On the beer from 4 , COYI ...........................


----------



## tommers (Jan 23, 2013)

It'll be interesting to see the team tonight.  I think Diame is gone tbh, £3.5 million is nothing for somebody like him and he'll have bigger fish than us coming in.

This game is a bonus, not expecting anything but we'll see what happens.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 24, 2013)

Ooooooops........................ At least we got to celebrate the first goal , we were all over them for a couple of minutes .


----------



## tommers (Jan 24, 2013)

It was the other 88 that were the problem.


----------



## tommers (Jan 24, 2013)

Actually first half was decent.  Held our own and had a couple of chances,  Carlton should have scored.  Then I went upstairs at half time to put the baby to bed, came down half hour later and we were 5-1 down!


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 24, 2013)

They tore us apart to be fair , 10 mins of superb football , we are slow at the back but I think they would have done it against anyone . I just read on KUMB that the total transfer fee of our players last night was 6.5 Mill , all others on free or loanees or academy players  . Cole did what he could , def not his fault , VT looks out of his depth in the Prem which is a shame . No J.Cole , Diame or Jarvis , strange team selection i thought , particularly with no game this weekend . Fulham next week should show us where we really stand .


----------



## tommers (Jan 24, 2013)

Yeah, I could kind of understand it if we were playing this weekend but we're not, so that was just bizarre.


----------



## tommers (Jan 24, 2013)

Diame says he wants to stay.  I love him again.

http://www.kumb.com/story.php?id=126695


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 24, 2013)

Diamearmy............. in other words no one came in for him yet ?  I will give him the benefit of the doubt , we are a worse team without him .


----------



## tommers (Jan 24, 2013)

hammerntongues said:


> Diamearmy............. in other words no one came in for him yet ? I will give him the benefit of the doubt , we are a worse team without him .


 
  Cynical? (and probably true.)

Any co-incidence that that comes out on the "deadline" for his new contract offer?


----------



## mattie (Jan 25, 2013)

You'll never guess who's after Diame.  (apart from a desperate bungpuss, obviously)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2013/jan/24/tottenham-mohamed-diame-west-ham

Filthy plunderers.


----------



## tommers (Jan 25, 2013)

There's a shock.


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 25, 2013)

Nice to see the push for relegation is full on now.


----------



## tommers (Jan 25, 2013)

Cheer up, it's Friday.


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 25, 2013)

Quite right!


----------



## Lo Siento. (Jan 25, 2013)

mattie said:


> You'll never guess who's after Diame. (apart from a desperate bungpuss, obviously)
> 
> http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2013/jan/24/tottenham-mohamed-diame-west-ham
> 
> Filthy plunderers.


It's amazing just how shite most football clubs seem to be at scouting footballers. This is Diame's 5th season in professional football, apparently before he played 6 months for a London club no-one realised he was actually quite good. 

(see also, Graham Carr's "amazing" ability to "find" players like Yohan Cabaye, one of the best players in a Lille title-winning side, Papiss Cisse, the second top-scorer in the Bundesliga or Michael Laudrup's miraculous signing of the top-scoring midfielder in La Liga etc etc.)


----------



## tommers (Jan 25, 2013)

He was free in the Summer.  And now £3.5 million is a "steal."


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 25, 2013)

stupid question but if WE think he is worth more than £ 3.5 mill can WHU not exercise the option and buy him from ourselves ie give him the dosh ? Hypothetical of course it would make us the laughing stock of the premiership .


----------



## tommers (Jan 25, 2013)

hammerntongues said:


> stupid question but if WE think he is worth more than £ 3.5 mill can WHU not exercise the option and buy him from ourselves ie give him the dosh ? Hypothetical of course it would make us the laughing stock of the premiership .


 
I think that's pretty much what we're trying isn't it?  By giving him more wages?  In a round about way.


----------



## Lo Siento. (Jan 25, 2013)

tommers said:


> He was free in the Summer. And now £3.5 million is a "steal."


quite. What the fuck were Arsenal, Tottenham and Fulham doing then?


----------



## tommers (Jan 25, 2013)

Lo Siento. said:


> quite. What the fuck were Arsenal, Tottenham and Fulham doing then?


 
Selling Van Persie, employing more orange suited workers for their secret volcano base and polishing their Michael Jackson statue, respectively.


----------



## mattie (Jan 25, 2013)

Sod's law says that Diame opts to leg it just after we let Diarra go.

If he goes to spuds I'm taking a contract out on Levy.


----------



## tommers (Jan 25, 2013)

mattie said:


> Sod's law says that Diame opts to leg it just after we let Diarra go.
> 
> If he goes to spuds I'm taking a contract out on Levy.



Levy has an alarm on his mobile set for 11.30pm on the 31st. You know it.


----------



## mattie (Jan 25, 2013)

'Thursday 31st, 10:30pm. Farm baby orphans for organs.'
'Thursday 31st, 11:00pm. Set off tsunami doomsday machine.'
'Thursday 31st, 11:30pm. Fuck West Ham over.'

The stories his PA could tell.


----------



## tommers (Jan 27, 2013)

Pogatetz and warnock coming in, apparently.  I imagine that's it then, unless diame does a bunk.


----------



## mattie (Jan 27, 2013)

Pogatetz is a fiery midfielder, amy signal the departure of Diame.

Pogatetz also has the nickname 'Mad Dog'.  Bodes well.


----------



## tommers (Jan 28, 2013)

mattie said:


> Pogatetz is a fiery midfielder, amy signal the departure of Diame.
> 
> Pogatetz also has the nickname 'Mad Dog'.  Bodes well.



Defender isn't he?  I like players with the nickname 'mad dog.' It's been a while. We're too cultured by far.


----------



## mattie (Jan 28, 2013)

tommers said:


> Defender isn't he? I like players with the nickname 'mad dog.' It's been a while. We're too cultured by far.


 
Ah, yes, you are right - for some reason I thought I saw him play in midfield for Middlesbrough, but that may just have been Schteeve's tactical genius.

Apparently he's fractured cheekbone, jaw and eyesocket when challenging for a header.  Although obviously not a good thing, I can't see the same happening to Upson.


----------



## tommers (Jan 29, 2013)

Diame might be going again.

I'm bored of him now.


----------



## mattie (Jan 29, 2013)

Levy's alarm obviously went off a little early.

Either that or he had some free time in between burning down childrens' hospitals and drowning puppies.


----------



## mattie (Jan 30, 2013)

Razvan Rat?  What next, Kezvan the Gerbil?

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/...tottenham-razvan-rat-to-west-ham-8472469.html

Also, bungpuss sniffing around Scottie P.  Quelle surprise.


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 30, 2013)

I read there were two teams interested in him (Rat)....can't for the life of me think who the other side was.


----------



## tommers (Jan 30, 2013)

This is getting ridiculous.


----------



## tommers (Jan 30, 2013)

I am beginning to worry a little bit.


----------



## Ponyutd (Jan 30, 2013)

Where was Allardyce post match? Why did he send McDonald out...nothing to laugh about now eh Sam. Swansea Villa Tottenham and Stoke next. Might snatch a point from Villa I spose.
Piss poor.


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Where was Allardyce post match? Why did he send McDonald out...


 
I imagine he didn't want to get himself another disrepute charge by ranting about their first goal when there were 3 players offside.


----------



## mattie (Feb 1, 2013)

I think we may have come out of that transfer period relatively unscathed.

Lost Diarra, gained Mad Dog MkII, Joe Cole and Wellington.  Anyone else?  Did we land Paul Robinson?  Did Gold really avoid Levy's mind-control rays?  Is Maiga still about?

Half-expected wor Andy to be back to Scouseland, Liverpool still seem quite short (literally and metaphorically) up front.


----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 1, 2013)

mattie said:


> I think we may have come out of that transfer period relatively unscathed.
> 
> Lost Diarra, gained Mad Dog MkII, Joe Cole and Wellington. Anyone else? Did we land Paul Robinson? Did Gold really avoid Levy's mind-control rays? Is Maiga still about?
> 
> Half-expected wor Andy to be back to Scouseland, Liverpool still seem quite short (literally and metaphorically) up front.


 
We got Chamakh too and that Irish Lad , and kept Maiga we definitely got a little stronger in the window , that`s all we can ask i guess .


----------



## mattie (Feb 1, 2013)

Yep, not bad at all - Joey Cole was the jewel in the crown, but decent work all round.

Particularly pleased about Pogatetz, needed some grit, brimstone and crazy-eyed stares in defence.  Winston Reid with a mohican does not quite do it for me.


----------



## Ponyutd (Feb 2, 2013)

Andy Carroll, immense today. That's a relief for sure. Alamo stuff towards the end.


----------



## Libertad (Feb 2, 2013)

11th doesn't look so bad atm.


----------



## tommers (Feb 2, 2013)

They had a lot of possession but created nothing till the last ten minutes.

Their goalkeeper kept em in it tbh.

Andy Carroll makes a real difference to us.


----------



## Ponyutd (Feb 5, 2013)

Twenty years ago this month he died...twenty years!


----------



## Ponyutd (Feb 6, 2013)

New shirt sponsor named as Alpari FX. Three million a year, starts in 2016.


----------



## mattie (Feb 10, 2013)

Hold the phones - we lost away from home?


----------



## Ponyutd (Feb 10, 2013)

I was hoping for a point there to be honest. Damn those villains.


----------



## tommers (Feb 10, 2013)

I didn't see the first half but the second was pretty even and we had our chances. Once again their goalie did well.

Penalty was one cos he gave their player the opportunity but the guy was falling over as soon as he got in the area.  The free kick they scored from was just ridiculous.  Ah well, as long as we stay out of the mix then that's ok. Tricky games coming up though.


----------



## Ponyutd (Feb 11, 2013)

The Telegraph.

A step nearer the new ground.

Several weeks of intense negotiations between the two parties bore fruit on Monday when they reached an agreement on key areas of dispute, with a proposal expected to be put to the London Legacy Development Corporation’s board next Tuesday.
The big sticking point was the demand by Boris Johnson, the Mayor of London and the LLDC chairman, for a cut of any profit if West Ham were sold, something the club are understood to have conceded to.
Sources at Upton Park refused to comment on what had been agreed but there was optimism the approval of the LLDC board would be given, despite there being small hurdles still to


An LLDC spokesman said on Monday night: “Things are going well but we’re not quite there yet.”
Any deal would allow West Ham to begin a thorough consultation process with their supporters, which could yet raise fresh issues of concern.


----------



## tommers (Feb 12, 2013)

I don't want to have anything to do with that mop haired imbecile.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Feb 12, 2013)

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepag...lista-stays-home-as-West-Ham-go-to-Dubai.html

sounds like a dedicated lad.  perhaps a go in the first team for half an hour might be useful.


----------



## mattie (Feb 15, 2013)

http://www.kumb.com/story.php?id=126723

Decision 'within a week'.

Barry Hearn sounds like he's preparing to spit the dummy again.  Thoughts on ground share with Orient?


----------



## mattie (Feb 15, 2013)

Oh, and spuds a week on Monday.

Could be messy.


----------



## mattie (Feb 19, 2013)

Lazy journalism.  Surely.

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/...link-after-quitting-swindon-post-8500416.html


----------



## mattie (Feb 19, 2013)

Hooray.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2013/feb/18/olympic-stadium-west-ham-ldcc


----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 25, 2013)

Big game tonight , we have looked pretty solid at UP , 3 points and we can enjoy the rest of the season with pressure off . We are back to a full squad and I can see us putting up a decent performance .

 1-0 to the Cockney Boys for me ,  Carrol to score .


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

If we break Bale's legs in the first 10 minutes then we might be alright.  I dunno, got to say Spurs are the favourites but it's a local derby and we're at home, so you never know.

I think Wellington might get a few minutes too.


----------



## Libertad (Feb 25, 2013)

Still missing you Sir Bobby. 20 years.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Feb 25, 2013)

3-1 to them


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

Libertad said:


> Still missing you Sir Bobby. 20 years.


 
Should be a big thing tonight.


----------



## Libertad (Feb 25, 2013)

tommers said:


> Should be a big thing tonight.


 
I hope we behave ourselves. The Press are waiting to jump on us. Quite rightly imo.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 25, 2013)

cmon you hams, stop the tots


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

not-bono-ever said:


> cmon you hams


The anti-semitic stuff starts already.


----------



## Maurice Picarda (Feb 25, 2013)

Don't make the Irons cross.


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

Little forrest gump git.


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

mattie said:


> Little forrest gump git.



What did I say?


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

tommers said:


> What did I say?


 
At least it wasn't Defoe.


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

Is Joey O'Brien seriously the best we can do at left-back?


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

mattie said:


> Is Joey O'Brien seriously the best we can do at left-back?



Unless you think danny Potts is better...


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

Gary O'Neil as midfield general.

The world's gone mad.


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

tommers said:


> Unless you think danny Potts is better...


 
He's not worse, put it that way.


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

Why the minute's silence for Bobby Zamora?


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

Corax said:


> Why the minute's silence for Bobby Zamora?


 
There are some things you just don't joke about.


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

Dirty spuds.

*cough*


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

Boom.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 25, 2013)

Corax said:


> The anti-semitic stuff starts already.


 

oof!

actually, just realised that I need the hams to lose for the toon to move up a place

oh....Andy carroll


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

mattie said:


> There are some things you just don't joke about.


What happened to him?  

Spurs legend he was.


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

This game needs more spite.


----------



## mattie (Feb 25, 2013)

Oh, here we go.  Wingnut over the ball.


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

mattie said:


> Oh, here we go.  Wingnut over the ball.



Planet of the fucking apes.


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

He is truly a benevolent Bale, and saw fit to grant you mercy.


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

Joe effing Cole!!!!

And what a reaction!


----------



## The39thStep (Feb 25, 2013)

Anything to stop spurs overtaking Chelsea


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

Will somebody fucking mark caulker??


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

This sucks and I hate you all you bastards.


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

Goal of the season.


----------



## Libertad (Feb 25, 2013)

Jesus fuck.


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

Libertad said:


> Jesus fuck.


You're just jealous that we can craft such intricate silky moves.  It's like watching Barca.


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

Can your keeper fuck the fuck off now please?


----------



## Sweet FA (Feb 25, 2013)

Cunt.


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

Oh fuck you.


----------



## Corax (Feb 25, 2013)

What kind of cunts have you got in your crowd booing Parker off?


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

Corax said:


> What kind of cunts have you got in your crowd booing Parker off?



Absolutely. Cunts.


----------



## The39thStep (Feb 25, 2013)

Useless bloody west ham


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

No wonder they're fucking hugging him.


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

I was trying to remember what game that reminded me of... it was the liverpool one.  Gutted.


----------



## Libertad (Feb 25, 2013)

Games like that do my fucking swede in.


----------



## tommers (Feb 25, 2013)

And that fucking Man Utd game when Van Persie scored in the last cunting minute.  How many fucking times?

Fuck "fuck modern football", just "fuck football."


----------



## el-ahrairah (Feb 25, 2013)

Corax said:


> The anti-semitic stuff starts already.


 
sorry.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Feb 25, 2013)

i was nearly right


----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 26, 2013)

We lost but we played as well as we have all season , a great game . Everyone stepped up , apart from Pogotetz who came on late and looked woeful but everyone else did their job , special mentions for Jussi , JC and Winston . There were a few Morons booing Parker but he came off to an ovation from The West Side which he acknowleged . If you heard any anti-semetic chants then I am very surprised , I certainly didn`t hear any at all and  the Spurs fans were respectful during the minute for Bobby Moore.


----------



## Libertad (Mar 2, 2013)

That'll do.


----------



## tommers (Mar 2, 2013)

Libertad said:


> That'll do.



Absolutely. 2nd team to win there this season or something and 9 pts clear of relegation.  Can't say fairer than that.


----------



## Ponyutd (Mar 4, 2013)

Delighted with what could turn out to be a big result. I had in my mind Etherington slinging a cross over for a goal so was delighted he didn't figure in the game. Nice to see Collinson scoring on StDavid's day as well.
Perhaps Pullis should send then to Dubai for a four day bender....it does wonders for other teams.


----------



## Ponyutd (Mar 6, 2013)

Leyton Orient have applied to the High Court for a judicial review into West Ham's proposed move into London's Olympic Stadium


----------



## tommers (Mar 6, 2013)

Yawn.


----------



## tommers (Mar 17, 2013)

Looking forward to the annual thrashing we give Chelsea at their place.


----------



## tommers (Mar 17, 2013)

That goal shouldn't have been disallowed. Diving fuck.


----------



## Libertad (Mar 17, 2013)

Fucksticks


----------



## tommers (Mar 17, 2013)

Libertad said:


> Fucksticks



Yeah. They were all over us (although the stats actually look better than I thought) but not much you can do when mata and hazard play like that.

That goal should never have been disallowed though, and now it's another 2 weeks till the next game


----------



## Libertad (Mar 17, 2013)

Time for Noble and Nolan to heal up though?


----------



## tommers (Mar 17, 2013)

Libertad said:


> Time for Noble and Nolan to heal up though?


 
Yeah, and cole and whatever made Diame go off.  I just get bored when there's not a game on.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2013)

tommers said:


> Looking forward to the annual thrashing we give Chelsea at their place.


 
Watched this quite bizarrely in an Irish pub with Gaelic football on one screen this on the other and a DJ system blasting out.I was the only one watching it and had to keep asking people not to stand in front of the screen. Then the TV went off when someone tripped over some wires and I had to pester the bar staff to get the thing on again. Good performance by us. I though Carrol had his moments and your keeper ( cant be bothered to spleen his name ) did well to keep-the score down.

Good of your lot to throw money at Lampard and Terry perhaps they will be with you next season?


----------



## tommers (Mar 18, 2013)

The39thStep said:


> Good of your lot to throw money at Lampard and Terry perhaps they will be with you next season?


 
Didn't see that.  I saw Terry warming up in front of our fans but didn't know anybody threw stuff at him.  And Lampard?  What for?  Scoring against us again?  People are idiots.


----------



## The39thStep (Mar 18, 2013)

tommers said:


> Didn't see that. I saw Terry warming up in front of our fans but didn't know anybody threw stuff at him. And Lampard? What for? Scoring against us again? People are idiots.


 
Not making a big deal of it as these idiots are so fucking predictable.


----------



## tommers (Mar 18, 2013)

"natural curve of my run"


----------



## editor (Mar 18, 2013)

There's still some Neanderthals at West Ham then.


> Two West Ham fans have been arrested over racially-aggravated public order offences following Sunday's Premier League match against Chelsea.
> http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-21826530


 


> The Metropolitan Police announced last night they were investigating trouble at the game where West Ham supporters threw missiles at captain John Terry and Frank Lampard.
> But this morning they confirmed to Standard Sport that they had extended their inquiries.
> A spokesman for the Metropolitan Police would not give details of who the fans had allegedly targeted but said: “There were four men arrested. Two for a racially aggravated public order offence and they have been bailed to return in late March.
> 
> ...


----------



## hammerntongues (Mar 18, 2013)

editor said:


> There's still some Neanderthals at West Ham then.


 
yep now that Cardiff , Chelsea , Man City , Millwall and all the others in the football league have got it completely under control it`s a little embarrasing that us Hammers are the only club left who still have idiots amongst the support , shame really .


----------



## editor (Mar 18, 2013)

hammerntongues said:


> yep now that Cardiff , Chelsea , Man City , Millwall and all the others in the football league have got it completely under control it`s a little embarrasing that us Hammers are the only club left who still have idiots amongst the support , shame really .


Bit sad that you're making excuses for racism. I would have thought you'd be quick to condemn it outright - I certainly would be if it happened at a club I supported.


----------



## hammerntongues (Mar 18, 2013)

Absolutely condemn it in every way . Not making excuses because there cannot be any but it seemed like a more directed criticism of my club . I have been a season ticket holder many years and consider West Ham to be one of the better clubs in that regard , racism thankfully is on the decline at the majority football grounds and in my own experience is almost non-existent at Upton Park , this is something that cannot be said for a lot of other teams and their supporters .

John Terry bends over and shows his arse to the away section and then complains he had stuff thrown at him , again it cannot be condoned but what did he honestly expect .


----------



## imposs1904 (Mar 19, 2013)

hammerntongues said:


> Absolutely condemn it in every way . Not making excuses because there cannot be any but it seemed like a more directed criticism of my club . I have been a season ticket holder many years and consider West Ham to be one of the better clubs in that regard , racism thankfully is on the decline at the majority football grounds and in my own experience is almost non-existent at Upton Park , this is something that cannot be said for a lot of other teams and their supporters .
> 
> John Terry bends over and shows his arse to the away section and then complains he had stuff thrown at him , again it cannot be condoned but what did he honestly expect .


 

Isn't Terry originally from Barking? Surely he would have been a West Ham fan growing up?


----------



## hammerntongues (Mar 19, 2013)

imposs1904 said:


> Isn't Terry originally from Barking? Surely he would have been a West Ham fan growing up?


 
I think he even played at WHU as a junior before going to Chelsea .The man is a grade A prize wanker but  I am sure we would be cheering him as some sort of hero if he was at West Ham but hey  this is football its not supposed to be  rational .


----------



## 1927 (Mar 19, 2013)

hammerntongues said:


> I think he even played at WHU as a junior before going to Chelsea .The man is a grade A prize wanker but I am sure we would be cheering him as some sort of hero if he was at West Ham but hey this is football its not supposed to be rational .


 
Spent 4 years in youth from 91-95, guess at same time as Cole, Lamps and Rio.


----------



## tommers (Mar 19, 2013)

Blair turgott has just scored a great hattrick against QPR in a friendly (decent QPR team though.)


----------



## Ponyutd (Mar 20, 2013)

http://www.scotsman.com/sport/footb...mas-taunts-worst-scotland-team-ever-1-2845735
Really! Moron.


----------



## imposs1904 (Mar 21, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> http://www.scotsman.com/sport/footb...mas-taunts-worst-scotland-team-ever-1-2845735
> Really! Moron.


 
wrong thread? 

bit daft, wasn't it? maybe he was short of a few quid and the journalist was short of a few quotes. it's not a decent Scotland team by any standards but, for all that, but for a bit of Bale brilliance they could have got a result in the last game. and he'll look like a numpty if scotland win at hampden.


----------



## tommers (Mar 21, 2013)

When did Mickey Thomas ever play for us?


----------



## Ponyutd (Mar 21, 2013)

That's why I posted it here....he never played for West Ham...ever!


----------



## Ponyutd (Mar 21, 2013)

imposs1904 said:


> wrong thread?
> 
> bit daft, wasn't it? maybe he was short of a few quid and the journalist was short of a few quotes. it's not a decent Scotland team by any standards but, for all that, but for a bit of Bale brilliance they could have got a result in the last game. and he'll look like a numpty if scotland win at hampden.


 
Should have made it clearer. I was talking about the so called journo.


----------



## tommers (Mar 21, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Should have made it clearer. I was talking about the so called journo.


 
I was confused!


----------



## imposs1904 (Mar 21, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Should have made it clearer. I was talking about the so called journo.


 
Apologies. I'd read about Thomas's daft quotes somewhere else so I didn't click on your link. I wonder who the journalist was confusing Thomas or West Ham with?


----------



## tommers (Mar 21, 2013)

Wrexham.


----------



## imposs1904 (Mar 21, 2013)

tommers said:


> Wrexham.


 
Wrexham and West Ham. I get them mixed up *all the time*.


----------



## chieftain (Mar 22, 2013)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/21889864


----------



## tommers (Mar 22, 2013)

You obviously didn't even read the article chief.

And that woman's looking in the wrong end.


----------



## tommers (Mar 22, 2013)

Grauniad said:
			
		

> Under the deal announced on Friday, West Ham will pay only £15m for a 99-year lease on a stadium whose conversion costs will be £150m to £190m and whose overall cost could top £630m.
> Caborn said: "This is the biggest mistake of the Olympics and lessons should be learned from this. West Ham are basically getting a stadium costing more than £600m for just £15m and a small amount in annual rent [£2m].


----------



## Libertad (Mar 22, 2013)

Looking forward to the rebirth of Thames Ironworks as a street football team.
Gold and Sullivan must be laughing all the way to the bank. Oh


----------



## el-ahrairah (Mar 22, 2013)

we're no longer owner-occupiers, we're tenants.  going up in the world.


----------



## chieftain (Mar 22, 2013)

tommers said:


> You obviously didn't even read the article chief.


 
I can't see the appeal of the (single level?) retractable seats covering the running track that wont be removed. Still going to be a million miles from the pitch unless you sit at ground level though?

Whats the options: No view on a single level or bins needed in the stands. Developing Upton Park would have been much more fun!



tommers said:


> And that woman's looking in the wrong end.


 
Her view will probably be about right if you're in row Z


----------



## chieftain (Mar 22, 2013)

Libertad said:


> Looking forward to the rebirth of Thames Ironworks as a street football team.
> Gold and Sullivan must be laughing all the way to the bank. Oh


 
He's going to be able to finance a lot of porn with his profits.


----------



## tommers (Mar 22, 2013)

chieftain said:


> I can't see the appeal of the (single level?) retractable seats covering the running track that wont be removed. Still going to be a million miles from the pitch unless you sit at ground level though?
> 
> Whats the options: No view on a single level or bins needed in the stands. Developing Upton Park would have been much more fun



We can't redevelop the Boleyn - been through it loads of times. Council won't let us and the transport is inadequate as it is. It's a nightmare getting away after a game. 

What do you mean 'single level'?  They'll be a stand - like the stade de france.

How is the Northumberland project going anyway? Not heard much since you were 'just about to start digging' about 5 years ago.

There are loads of worries about this - not least that we'll be tenants rather than owners, like bluey says.  It could be good though. I've said since it started that we need to wait till we see the plans. Instead you lot have been banging on about running tracks. Well, what do you know?  Running track with be covered with seats next to the pitch.


----------



## el-ahrairah (Mar 22, 2013)

i have to admit, i also don't see why we can't ground share with the orient.  i wouldn't really have a problem with that at all.  can anyone explain to me why this is a bad idea?


----------



## tommers (Mar 22, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> i have to admit, i also don't see why we can't ground share with the orient.  i wouldn't really have a problem with that at all.  can anyone explain to me why this is a bad idea?



No idea but they get crowds of about 5,000 don't they?  Be a bit lost in 54000. But I wouldn't really have a problem with it.


----------



## tommers (Mar 25, 2013)

Good interview with Tony Cottee here:

https://www.westhamtillidie.com/posts/514f6cf3cb241e72410022df


----------



## imposs1904 (Mar 25, 2013)

tommers said:


> Good interview with Tony Cottee here:
> 
> https://www.westhamtillidie.com/posts/514f6cf3cb241e72410022df


 
My first thought was 'a couple of tory arseholes' but that was an interesting interview. Cheers.


----------



## tommers (Mar 25, 2013)

Is cottee a Tory? I didn't know that.


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## imposs1904 (Mar 25, 2013)

tommers said:


> Is cottee a Tory? I didn't know that.


 
'fraid so. The same Iain Dale made a list of celebrity Tories a few years back.

It's fucking woeful . . .  and I bet the list is even more woeful these days.


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## tommers (Mar 25, 2013)

First Di Canio and now Cottee.  Next you'll be telling me Trevor Brooking used to be in the Klu Klux Klan.

Oh fuck.  And then I read the list.   Trevor.  Fuck's sake.


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## hammerntongues (Mar 26, 2013)

Wilfreid Bonny ? what do we know about him .............. 26 goals in 24 games and Erivisie leading goalscorer, surely we cant sign him can we ?


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## el-ahrairah (Mar 26, 2013)

if we do, we can be sure he'll either dry up, fall out with fatty during training in week one, or break a leg.


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## Ponyutd (Mar 26, 2013)

_In the comments of that list I saw this_

"I have memorised off by heart a letter I read in the Daily Mail in the late 90s. I must say that I give the letters editor credit for printing - no doubt for pure comedy value. It read:

------

Sir,


So I see Labour have unrepentant, convicted terrorist, Nelson Mandela, at their conference while the Conservatives have British patriot, Jim Davidson, at theirs.

Says it all.

Yours sincerely,"


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## Ponyutd (Mar 26, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> if we do, we can be sure he'll either dry up, fall out with fatty during training in week one, or break a leg.


Or score a few, play well, go to Newcastle and then on to Chel*ea.


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## Libertad (Mar 26, 2013)

Marco Boogers anyone?


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## tommers (Mar 30, 2013)

Great win, 3 great goals - just a shame the ref gave em a penalty for very little (that I could see.)  Still, it was a pretty even game, we just took our chances.  That 2nd Carroll goal was brilliant.

Still only 6 pts off the drop too!  Would have been panicking if we'd lost.


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## el-ahrairah (Mar 30, 2013)

glad it was a good game.  i think we're safe but will we be next season?


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## tommers (Mar 30, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> glad it was a good game. i think we're safe but will we be next season?


 
Christ knows.

http://paddypowerblog.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/blog_carroll_hdr.gif?w=610


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## Libertad (Mar 30, 2013)

Cracking goal that!  I reckon we need six points from the eight games and we're safe.


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## tommers (Mar 30, 2013)

Yeah, surely we can't go down on 42 again.  Got some tough away games - we never win at Anfield and I don't fancy us at Southampton either (and there's a trip to the Etihad) but surely we can stay ahead of 6 of the 7 below us.


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## el-ahrairah (Apr 1, 2013)

tha's what i feel.  i don't think reading can do it, qpr are goners.  wigan will pull it out of the hat again, the swine, villa and sunderland... well, who knows.


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## Ponyutd (Apr 8, 2013)

West Ham sing Harry potter is coming to get you Sunday
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=N31xr5rTa4g


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## tommers (Apr 13, 2013)

Boom. Another point, another load of opposing fans moaning about us not lying down and letting them beat us. 38 points and still 6 games to go. Great stuff.


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## The39thStep (Apr 17, 2013)

Good start from west ham


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## el-ahrairah (Apr 17, 2013)

wasn't expecting that...


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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)

Haha. Fuck off Ferguson.


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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)

I missed the last 15 mins of that half cos I had to try to get the baby back to sleep but I thought we dominated the first 30 mins.  Did man Utd have a shot before their goal?

I fully expect them to come out 2nd half and "step up a gear" but we haven't been outclassed by any means...


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## The39thStep (Apr 17, 2013)

Please get that sycophantic arselicking Gary Neville off our screens


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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)

Great goal. LOL at the commentators being surprised that we might pass it.


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## Lord Camomile (Apr 17, 2013)

Well what in the fuck's going on here then!


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## Libertad (Apr 17, 2013)




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## The39thStep (Apr 17, 2013)

What is it with referees and man utd decisions?


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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)

Offside.


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## Libertad (Apr 17, 2013)

Fuckit


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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)

Libertad said:


> Fuckit



Hardly unpredictable is it?  Hard enough playing man utd without having to beat the officials as well.


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## Libertad (Apr 17, 2013)

Fergie time now


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## Libertad (Apr 17, 2013)

Another point, should've been three.


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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)

Well done West Ham, great game and we deserved to win that (and would have done if the officials hadn't been corrupt blind.)  Dominated the first 60 mins and then contained Man Utd's inevitable pressure reasonably comfortably (one clearance off the line and a couple of jussi specials aside.)  Great pressure, we gave Man utd a bit of a beasting TBH.


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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)




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## tommers (Apr 17, 2013)

> *Manchester City manager Roberto Mancini on Manchester United's 13-point advantage*: "If they hadn't scored an offside goal it would be even fewer points."


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## Ponyutd (Apr 18, 2013)

Hammer of the year, Mo's signing off goal ?


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## tommers (Apr 18, 2013)




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## Kanda (Apr 18, 2013)

Libertad said:


> Fergie time now


 
4 mins... . Did you miss how long Evra and De Gea were down for after getting steamrollered by Carrol? (I didn't, I was at the game)

5 substitutions (30 secs per substitution = 2.5 mins)

Numerous other stopages...

and you call 4 mins Fergie time? How about watching what happens instead of reeling off tired cliches


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## tommers (Apr 18, 2013)

Kanda said:


> 4 mins... . Did you miss how long Evra and De Gea were down for after getting steamrollered by Carrol? (I didn't, I was at the game)


 
That was in the first half.


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## Kanda (Apr 18, 2013)

tommers said:


> That was in the first half.


 
Ah, thought it was on 49 mins.

Still.. not exactly a lot of stoppage time with 5 subs. Especailly when the game was stopped for a sub then they decided not to sub too...


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## tommers (Apr 18, 2013)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2013/apr/18/manchester-united-ferguson-west-ahm-allardyce

Another game, another team peddling the tired, old rubbish cos they didn't get what they wanted.

Haha fergie, watch your blood pressure.


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## Libertad (Apr 18, 2013)

Kanda said:


> 4 mins... . Did you miss how long Evra and De Gea were down for after getting steamrollered by Carrol? (I didn't, I was at the game)
> 
> 5 substitutions (30 secs per substitution = 2.5 mins)
> 
> ...


 
Any injury time in a game involving Manchester United, especially when there's been the award of a contentious goal which was definitely offside, is Fergie time.
It's a football meme.


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## Balbi (Apr 19, 2013)

tommers said:


>


 
Oh god, what's he doing with his face?


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## tommers (Apr 19, 2013)

Balbi said:


> Oh god, what's he doing with his face?


 
 Smiling like a fucking boss.


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## Ponyutd (Apr 20, 2013)

It was lucky Ferguson escaped that war zone though.


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## tommers (Apr 20, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> It was lucky Ferguson escaped that war zone though.


 
Yeah.  Such a brutal game with the um... 1 yellow card (and that for getting a nice big hug.)  It's amazing any of them made it out of there.


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## el-ahrairah (Apr 22, 2013)

so it looks like we're safe.  i was expecting Wigan to beat us tbh, they normally do.


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## el-ahrairah (Apr 25, 2013)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/gallery/2013/apr/24/beautiful-games-kosmo-vinyl-football

has thou buggers seen this?


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## tommers (Apr 25, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/gallery/2013/apr/24/beautiful-games-kosmo-vinyl-football
> 
> has thou buggers seen this?



Heh. Quite like them but he does appear to concentrate on our defeats.


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## el-ahrairah (Apr 25, 2013)

that might be the selection effect!


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## tommers (Apr 26, 2013)

There's going to be a minute's applause for Marc-Vivien Foe in the 23rd minute of the match this weekend.  To mark the 10th anniversary of his death.

I know he only played for us for a season (I can't remember why) but I fucking loved Foe.  I thought he was brilliant.  I think this is a nice touch from City.


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## Ponyutd (Apr 26, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/gallery/2013/apr/24/beautiful-games-kosmo-vinyl-football
> 
> has thou buggers seen this?


I watched him on 5 live with the Millwall bloke. Very good value for money in my opinion.


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## tommers (Apr 27, 2013)

Oh well, we weren't embarassed.  Did well in the 2nd half.  Great goal by Toure.


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## tommers (Apr 29, 2013)




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## The39thStep (Apr 29, 2013)

Can't stand QPR , happy to see them out of the Premiership.

I met my mate ,Wythenshaw's only West Ham supporter, who reckons that Collins was player of the year for him.


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## tommers (Apr 29, 2013)

The39thStep said:


> Can't stand QPR , happy to see them out of the Premiership.
> 
> I met my mate ,Wythenshaw's only West Ham supporter, who reckons that Collins was player of the year for him.


 
That's Reading!

I have similar feelings about QPR but only cos of twitchy and fernandes.

Collins has been outstanding, certainly in the second half of the season, but I think Winston Reid just shades it for me.  Just been solid all season and has come on leaps and bounds since we first signed him.  Jarvis has done well too and, of course, Joey O'Brien is a real unsung hero.

The rest of them have had their moments but Diame, Carroll, Nolan and Noble have all had time out and been a bit too inconsistent.


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## el-ahrairah (May 6, 2013)

the players seem to be on their holidays now.  alright for some, eh?


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## tommers (May 6, 2013)

el-ahrairah said:


> the players seem to be on their holidays now.  alright for some, eh?



Yeah. I watched it, we were rubbish first half. Bit better second but we didn't look bothered.  I guess safety takes the urgency away.

We're supposed to be signing razvan rat in the summer.  Signed already, supposedly.


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## el-ahrairah (May 6, 2013)

he might well be a good signing, but i said that about pogatetz and paulista so what do i know?


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## tommers (May 9, 2013)

Winston Reid is Hammer of the Year, Billy Bonds gets a lifetime award tonight.  Both very much deserved.

Let's hope the players don't start fighting like they did 2 years ago.


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## tommers (May 19, 2013)

We finished 10th.  Amazing stuff from Big Sam and the team.  Highlight is undoubtedly beating Chelsea, in fact it was that Diame goal for the third.

Let's see if we can keep it stable next year and then who knows?


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## tommers (May 20, 2013)




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## 5t3IIa (May 20, 2013)

Hello tommers! *waves*

Everyone looked very happy out on Green Street yesterday! What happened?


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## tommers (May 20, 2013)

5t3IIa said:


> Hello tommers! *waves*
> 
> Everyone looked very happy out on Green Street yesterday! What happened?


 
We won Stella!  Last game of the season, carnival atmosphere.   Only another 3 months until it all starts again.  Must be quiet near you without a load of fat bald men in tight fitting claret tops.


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## 5t3IIa (May 20, 2013)

tommers said:


> We won Stella! Last game of the season, carnival atmosphere.  Only another 3 months until it all starts again. Must be quiet near you without a load of fat bald men in tight fitting claret tops.


 
Congratulations! I approve of carnival atmospheres and the hunky tattooed coppers that accompany them


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## tommers (May 20, 2013)

5t3IIa said:


> Congratulations! I approve of carnival atmospheres and the hunky tattooed coppers that accompany them


 
  Let's face it, they're the only reason anybody goes.  You'll have to move to Stratford in a couple of years, it'll be like a ghost town round there.  Unless you start a riot or something.


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## Libertad (May 20, 2013)

5t3IIa said:


> Hello tommers! *waves*
> 
> Everyone looked very happy out on Green Street yesterday! What happened?


 
'kinell @5t3lla fancy seeing you here  Good to know you're back.


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## 5t3IIa (May 20, 2013)

Libertad said:


> 'kinell @5t3lla fancy seeing you here  Good to know you're back.


 
Same to you with knobs on <3


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## Streathamite (May 20, 2013)

5t3IIa said:


> Hello tommers! *waves*
> 
> Everyone looked very happy out on Green Street yesterday! What happened?


wel, hello stranger! how's tricks?


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## 5t3IIa (May 20, 2013)

Streathamite said:


> wel, hello stranger! how's tricks?


 
Good thanks buddy, you too?


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## Streathamite (May 20, 2013)

5t3IIa said:


> Good thanks buddy, you too?


Yewp all cool here, good to see you around


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## tommers (May 21, 2013)

Carlton Cole has left the building.   whatever happened to all the heroes?

First Brian, now him. Who's going to fill my comedy cult hero hole now?


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## Balbi (May 21, 2013)

S'gotta be your new left back, Razvan Rat.


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## not-bono-ever (May 21, 2013)

Carrol fee agreed, though AC not yet signed

a net £20M loss for 'Pule if you go for it

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/22618340


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## tommers (May 21, 2013)

Balbi said:


> S'gotta be your new left back, Razvan Rat.



I have a feeling he's not going to be as funny as Carlton.  Joey O'Brien is a cult hero but he's not like a big stupid puppy. 


Not saying Carlton is stupid btw, I could just see him knocking stuff over in his enthusiasm.


----------



## tommers (May 21, 2013)

My favourite Carlton interview. Over chuffed.

When he tweeted that he was leaving he had the tag #underchuffed


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## tommers (May 21, 2013)

not-bono-ever said:


> Carrol fee agreed, though AC not yet signed
> 
> a net £20M loss for 'Pule if you go for it
> 
> http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/22618340



God knows where we have got 15 million from.  That's almost double our record fee.  Be good if he does sign though.


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## tommers (May 21, 2013)

tommers said:


> I have a feeling he's not going to be as funny as Carlton




Hmmm... Maybe I was wrong...



> Răzvan Raț ‏@rzvan_ra 1h
> I speak Ukraine and român but my English is said very badly!
> 
> Răzvan Raț ‏@rzvan_ra 59m
> It's an embarrassing for me because the web site says I speak perfect English!! I do not haha


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## Ponyutd (May 21, 2013)

tommers said:


> God knows where we have got 15 million from. That's almost double our record fee. Be good if he does sign though.


He 's taking his time saying yes
Come on Andy...fuckin' sign it!


----------



## tommers (May 21, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> He 's taking his time saying yes
> Come on Andy...fuckin' sign it!


 
It's only been a day!  I imagine he's waiting about to see who else comes in.  I dunno, he's settled, the manager clearly loves him and will build the team around him, his mate is here and he could be an absolute legend.. but... another team might offer him European football and more money.

There is still the agent connection though.


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## Ponyutd (May 21, 2013)

He knew Saturday Tommers. Get the bloody thing signed.


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## tommers (May 21, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> He knew Saturday Tommers. Get the bloody thing signed.


 
  Yeah, you're probably right.  Surely they've asked him about it?


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## Ponyutd (May 21, 2013)

Rio coming back


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## tommers (May 22, 2013)

What?!


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## Ponyutd (May 23, 2013)

Some rumours doing the rounds said it could happen.
Same rumours say Andy will sign. I would be delighted if he did .


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## tommers (May 23, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Some rumours doing the rounds said it could happen.
> Same rumours say Andy will sign. I would be delighted if he did .


 
Moose tweeted of Rio a picture saying "talks in early stages".  That almost certainly means it won't happen.  That guy never gets anything right.


----------



## Kanda (May 23, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Rio coming back


 
Don't think so....



> Central defender *Rio Ferdinand,* 34, signs a new one-year contract at *Manchester United.*
> On his Twitter account, Ferdinand says: "Sooooo happy to sign a one-year extension for this great club, living the dream. Roll on next season."


----------



## tommers (May 23, 2013)

Kanda said:


> Don't think so....


 

Normally the emphatic contradiction of Moose's "ITK" knowledge takes a bit longer than 1 day.


----------



## Ponyutd (May 23, 2013)

Heaven help me if I knew anything that idiot say's. It can from a fairly knowledgeable hammer....up till now anyway


----------



## tommers (May 23, 2013)

Ponyutd said:


> Heaven help me if I knew anything that idiot say's. It can from a fairly knowledgeable hammer....up till now anyway




 Another rumour I heard was that it was etherington!!  We've got away with it tbh.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 24, 2013)

from NUFC.com

"In amongst the widespread  reports of an accepted bid of £15m from West Ham for Liverpool striker *Andy Carroll*, claims of a 25% sell-on clause to former club Newcastle may turn out to be a significant factor in his future.

That is at odds to the received wisdom of the time, that United's dash for cash meant that they passed up the opportunity of a sell-on clause in order to maximise their proceeds from the sale to Liverpool.  
Alan Pardew has indicated that Carroll would be on his striker wish list and although no confirmation of a bid from SJP has materialised as yet, the existence of that clause means that an offer of £11.25m would match West Ham's.

Doubts over the ability of the Hammers to agree suitable payment terms could also put them behind Newcastle, who now tend to settle transfer deals straight away. Carroll's future has been further complicated by news that the heel injury that resulted in his withdrawal from the latest England squad is now predicted to sideline him for up to four months - well into next season.  

* PS:* Wednesday saw a raft of stories claiming that United had ended their interest in Carroll - you may wish to take those with a large pinch of salt... "


lol at the Pules for allowing a 25% sell on clause on an £35M cash deal.


----------



## tommers (May 24, 2013)

Jesus Christ. Could that deal get any worse for them?


----------



## tommers (May 24, 2013)

not-bono-ever is that the official site?

I'm guessing not, as one of the "genial hosts" is "biffa".  

Ah, official site is nufc.co.uk.  Sneaky.


----------



## not-bono-ever (May 24, 2013)

to be fair, they usually have the proper info- the official s(h)it(e) tells you nothing

worth keeping an eye on this little nugget to see if its true


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## Badgers (May 19, 2014)




----------

