# Getting desperate



## barney_pig (Oct 29, 2013)

At the beginning of September I had a job interview with the nhs. At the interview I was told that the job was to fill a vacancy and so they wanted the successful candidate to start as quickly as possible. Two days later I got the call and was offered the job, and as soon as my crb/ DBS was completed I could get started.
 I checked online and saw the DBS website was saying that a check took between 2 weeks and 4 weeks to complete. So I handed my notice in at sainsburys.
 It's now 6 weeks later, I am sitting at home, no job, no money. My DBS is 'with the local police (as it has been since the 18/9) and the DBS lady on the phone says they cannot contact the police to hurry it on until it has been with them more than 60 days!
 Added to this, we have had no foster child since the start of august.
 We are surviving at the moment on the generousity of my daughter, who has shared her university grant/ loan to help us pay the rent and buy food.
I am at my wits end. What do I do?


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Sounds like a crap situation, especially as you'll probably get paid in arrears once you start your new job.  I know you've probably done this already, but have you checked whether you're entitled to any benefits, as it isn't really your fault that the DBS system is crap?  They no longer have the social fund I gather and it is in the hands of the local authority, but that might be worth exploring too.

Failing that, writing to the police force concerned and lodging a formal complaint about the delays, and the impact it has on you.  That might hurry things along, especially if you say you'll be raising the matter with your MP. 

Might be an idea to contact your landlord and explain the situation, as they would hopefully be sympathetic given you are moving between on job and another, and therefore this is just a hiatus due to administrative cockups beyond your control.  Ditto utility companies and council tax department if you need to.  The main thing is to get in touch with the people you are supposed to pay money to quickly, rather than sit and panic about it, so at least they are likely to be more understanding.

I hope you get things sorted very soon, and sorry to hear about the limbo you are in.


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## cesare (Oct 29, 2013)

Barney, will the NHS give you any non children/vulnerable adult work to do until the DBS check clears? Also, might it be worth turning up at the local plod with a large bag of doughnuts and going on a charm offensive to chivvy them along a bit?

Horrible situation to be in  Any temporary agency work round your way in the meantime? Good luck.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Just had a quick search, and the government published this recently admitting to delays, but with the usual shite about 'working closely with the police forces' blah blah blah.  This page has a link to performance stats for police, so you might be able to see if your local force is performing poorly, and raise this in any complaint you make.

https://www.gov.uk/government/news/police-forces-handling-of-dbs-check-applications

And the main DBS site, which no doubt you already know about but the link might be useful to others in your situation:

https://www.gov.uk/government/organisations/disclosure-and-barring-service


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

cesare said:


> Barney, will the NHS give you any non children/vulnerable adult work to do until the DBS check clears? Also, might it be worth turning up at the local plod with a large bag of doughnuts and going on a charm offensive to chivvy them along a bit?
> 
> Horrible situation to be in  Any temporary agency work round your way in the meantime? Good luck.


 
Donuts - a genius idea!  Gets the police to do their job every time, without fail. 

But the suggestion that the NHS may be able to give you other work to do in the meantime is definitely worth exploring if you've not already done this - they are bound to have some stuff that doesn't require this clearance I'd guess.  Back office stuff for example?  But this depends on the nature of your new job - for all I know all aspects of it might require clearance.


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## barney_pig (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Just had a quick search, and the government published this recently admitting to delays, but with the usual shite about 'working closely with the police forces' blah blah blah.  This page has a link to performance stats for police, so you might be able to see if your local force is performing poorly, and raise this in any complaint you make.
> 
> https://www.gov.uk/government/news/police-forces-handling-of-dbs-check-applications
> 
> ...


Thankyou, that is interesting, but not reassuring. Thames valley are shown only to have completed 34%of its DBS within the 60 day target!
 I have been loathe to start job hunting again, especially as it took me so long to find this job, and I remained convinced that my DBS would arrive at any moment. ( my wife remains convinced that a phone call will arrive at any moment with a baby, so she cannot try to find alternative employment).
I signed on yesterday, filled out the online application in tears, I also filled in a registration form for an employment agency and started making job applications. I think I have missed most of the Christmas temp vacancies, but I will go into town this afternoon to start hunting.


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## stuff_it (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Thankyou, that is interesting, but not reassuring. Thames valley are shown only to have completed 34%of its DBS within the 60 day target!
> I have been loathe to start job hunting again, especially as it took me so long to find this job, and I remained convinced that my DBS would arrive at any moment. ( my wife remains convinced that a phone call will arrive at any moment with a baby, so she cannot try to find alternative employment).
> I signed on yesterday, filled out the online application in tears, I also filled in a registration form for an employment agency and started making job applications. I think I have missed most of the Christmas temp vacancies, but I will go into town this afternoon to start hunting.


Wait, that can happen!? 

*burns phone*


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Thankyou, that is interesting, but not reassuring. Thames valley are shown only to have completed 34%of its DBS within the 60 day target!
> I have been loathe to start job hunting again, especially as it took me so long to find this job, and I remained convinced that my DBS would arrive at any moment. ( my wife remains convinced that a phone call will arrive at any moment with a baby, so she cannot try to find alternative employment).
> I signed on yesterday, filled out the online application in tears, I also filled in a registration form for an employment agency and started making job applications. I think I have missed most of the Christmas temp vacancies, but I will go into town this afternoon to start hunting.


 
34% is truly abysmal, and frankly indefensible.  I think you should definitely make a formal complaint - the more complaints they get the more pressure it puts them under.  The .gov sites says the changes were legislative, so police forces would have been well aware in advance of what additional responsibility they would be getting in this area, so should have planned accordingly - and ACPO would have been involved in advising forces on how to handle this change. You could also think of writing to the PCC for TVP - they obviously speak to the chief constable regularly and this might be a way of getting your case sorted out.

Best of luck with the temp job hunting.


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## stuff_it (Oct 29, 2013)

Thames Valley are notorious shitebags for a lot of things, I doubt there's much you can do to improve matters. 

They've been the to go guys for "fuck the law, we don't give a fuck" policing for a number of years.


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## Smyz (Oct 29, 2013)

Get your MP involved.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Smyz said:


> Get your MP involved.


 
Agreed - it is issues like this that MPs really can be useful, as they passed the law in Parliament, and if it is being badly implemented, they have a unique position to complain to the police force about their failings.


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## Quartz (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> I am at my wits end. What do I do?



Jeebus, that sucks. Before speaking to your MP, can you not speak to the police yourself? Not a constable in the street, but go to the police station. Explain your situation, ask for advice, and perhaps an internal email will get you bumped up the list.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Quartz said:


> Jeebus, that sucks. Before speaking to your MP, can you not speak to the police yourself? Not a constable in the street, but go to the police station. Explain your situation, ask for advice, and perhaps an internal email will get you bumped up the list.


 
I think the figures quoted above are so far below what they should be for compliance with the targets, that going to the police station wouldn't work in my opinion.  Performance figures that poor are indicative of systemic problems within the force, so everyone waiting for their DBS clearance is in the same boat.  So making a formal complaint and going to an MP is probably the only way the logjam in this case will be cleared.  Sadly it is always the case with public bodies that who shouts loudest gets their case sorted more quickly - so knowing how to work the system to your advantage is key.  Its amazing how they suddenly spring to life when they receive a letter from an MP.


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## Puddy_Tat (Oct 29, 2013)

i would never resign from a job until any new offer is unconditional and a firm starting date is agreed.

although it's possibly a bit late to say that now.

you may get hassle from the dole about having resigned - the 'voluntarily unemployed' bollocks.

however, if you are sanctioned, there is the concept of a means-tested (i.e. household) 'hardship payment' you can apply for - you used to be told this existed, i don't think you do any more.

to the best of my knowledge, housing benefit (you say you pay rent) does not have the same 'voluntarily unemployed' sanctions on it, and you can claim housing benefit (and council tax reduction) with nil income - although the council will ask how you are meeting your living expenses.  they tend to be suspicious of people appearing to be surviving on nothing.  

i'm a little out of touch - they may want something on paper from daughter to say she has lent you money to tide you over.

and the sooner you lodge a claim the better - you generally can't get HB backdated unless you've got a very good reason (e.g. you've been in hospital and unable to put your claim in sooner.)

if you're somewhere that universal credit has started, then i'm not sure how accurate any of the above is.

ultimately, if you get your claim rejected, see about arguing.  and get someone like CAB involved.


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## Quartz (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I think the figures quoted above are so far below what they should be for compliance with the targets, that going to the police station wouldn't work in my opinion.



I fear you're right, but the point is to try. The first thing a MP's assistant is going to ask is, "Have you tried speaking to the police?" And you never know, it might work.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Quartz said:


> I fear you're right, but the point is to try. The first thing a MP's assistant is going to ask is, "Have you tried speaking to the police?" And you never know, it might work.


I agree - that's why it is important to raise it with the police - in a formal complaint in my view given their fuck ups are having a serious impact on Barney's life. But I'd make sure the complaint says he'll raise the matter with the MP - and to follow up that threat if they don't pull their finger out.


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## barney_pig (Oct 29, 2013)

Today I have had a phone call offering me an interview for a job that I applied for last night, and a follow up screening for a temp post at boots that I applied for this morning , and a e mail from a coffe shop I popped in to last week with a cv. Hopefully the interview with the job centre on Friday won't be necessary.


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## stuff_it (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Today I have had a phone call offering me an interview for a job that I applied for last night, and a follow up screening for a temp post at boots that I applied for this morning , and a e mail from a coffe shop I popped in to last week with a cv. Hopefully the interview with the job centre on Friday won't be necessary.


I cry foul, you can't possibly live in the UK if you can find work that easily!


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Great news! Hope one of them is suitable - I'd go for boots so you can steal controlled drugs from the pharmacy.


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## Pickman's model (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Today I have had a phone call offering me an interview for a job that I applied for last night, and a follow up screening for a temp post at boots that I applied for this morning , and a e mail from a coffe shop I popped in to last week with a cv. Hopefully the interview with the job centre on Friday won't be necessary.


good luck!


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## weepiper (Oct 29, 2013)

good luck barney.


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## llaarraa (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Today I have had a phone call offering me an interview for a job that I applied for last night, and a follow up screening for a temp post at boots that I applied for this morning , and a e mail from a coffe shop I popped in to last week with a cv. Hopefully the interview with the job centre on Friday won't be necessary.



I'm just curious, but does it really take two interviews to get a temp job at boots? Not sure if thats what you mean by screening, but am wondering.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

llaarraa said:


> I'm just curious, but does it really take two interviews to get a temp job at boots? Not sure if thats what you mean by screening, but am wondering.


 
Maybe its a traditional interview, and then the usual CRB checks which they might call screening? Always difficult to work out what exactly companies mean when looking at the recruitment policies.


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## stuff_it (Oct 29, 2013)

llaarraa said:


> I'm just curious, but does it really take two interviews to get a temp job at boots? Not sure if thats what you mean by screening, but am wondering.


You have to take an epic long personality test before you can apply for even a temp job. I failed it so epically last year that I'm banned from even applying for another Boots temp job for another 6 months.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

stuff_it said:


> You have to take an epic long personality test before you can apply for even a temp job. I failed it so epically last year that I'm banned from even applying for another Boots temp job for another 6 months.


 
Obviously some slip through the net - I've encountered some thoroughly unpleasant members of staff in Boots who had a downright nasty personality.


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## stuff_it (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Obviously some slip through the net - I've encountered some thoroughly unpleasant members of staff in Boots who had a downright nasty personality.


Maybe that's what they are looking for?


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## llaarraa (Oct 29, 2013)

stuff_it said:


> You have to take an epic long personality test before you can apply for even a temp job. I failed it so epically last year that I'm banned from even applying for another Boots temp job for another 6 months.


I always feel like it's obvious what I'm supposed to say, and thought they were pointless because everyone else would too. Maybe you made the crazy mistake of being honest. Oh well if it was last year you can reapply now and bullshit


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## stuff_it (Oct 29, 2013)

llaarraa said:


> I always feel like it's obvious what I'm supposed to say, and thought they were pointless because everyone else would too. Maybe you made the crazy mistake of being honest. Oh well if it was last year you can reapply now and bullshit


No I can't, I got an 18 month ban. 

I've even managed to pass one to work callcentre for Capital 1 so it's not like I can't scrape through these things.


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## llaarraa (Oct 29, 2013)

stuff_it said:


> No I can't, I got an 18 month ban.
> 
> I've even managed to pass one to work callcentre for Capital 1 so it's not like I can't scrape through these things.


Oh wow, 18 months - good effort. Those tests make no sense, if you are so far off the mark personality-wise when you first take the test, do they expect that in 18 months you will become a whole new person who has completely changed? Why do they bother? They should have banned you for life tbf


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## lolo (Oct 29, 2013)

hope it all goes well. as someone who works in nhs i can tell you that never hand in your notice until you get a start date - it is notoriously a long process as HR in NHS is shite - it took 3 months after job offer for me to start due to paperwork. Also the person employing you at NHS job is being rubbish as you are allowed to start a job without full checks if there are a few limitations put on you - perfectly legally - so they could have helped you there a bit too. Have you actually got a confirmed offer in writing yet?


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## barney_pig (Oct 29, 2013)

Email to alok Sharma sent off ( Tory of course, but he was helpful over the bedroom tax),
 The screening from boots was one of those odd questionnaires when you are asked a series of scenario questions and then about 50 bizarre personality questions; pairs of completely unrelated statements and you have to choose which closest matches you, "you make decisions quickly" or "seeing other peoples points of view is important to you". Etc.


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## barney_pig (Oct 29, 2013)

lolo said:


> hope it all goes well. as someone who works in nhs i can tell you that never hand in your notice until you get a start date - it is notoriously a long process as HR in NHS is shite - it took 3 months after job offer for me to start due to paperwork. Also the person employing you at NHS job is being rubbish as you are allowed to start a job without full checks if there are a few limitations put on you - perfectly legally - so they could have helped you there a bit too. Have you actually got a confirmed offer in writing yet?


I have had the confirmed conditional offer letter since September 18th.
 I chased up all the references and had them all returned within 10 days, and so all that is outstanding is the DBS.


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## lolo (Oct 29, 2013)

Is it worth speaking to your new line manager whoever that will be and seeing if they can help you?


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

lolo said:


> hope it all goes well. as someone who works in nhs i can tell you that never hand in your notice until you get a start date - it is notoriously a long process as HR in NHS is shite - it took 3 months after job offer for me to start due to paperwork. Also the person employing you at NHS job is being rubbish as you are allowed to start a job without full checks if there are a few limitations put on you - perfectly legally - so they could have helped you there a bit too. Have you actually got a confirmed offer in writing yet?


 
HR departments everywhere are utterly shite.  I often wonder why they don't just save loads of cash and fire the lot of them.  It would make everyone else's jobs a lot easier (we end up having to do their job for them anyway, so wouldn't be too much of a change).


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Email to alok Sharma sent off ( Tory of course, but he was helpful over the bedroom tax),
> The screening from boots was one of those odd questionnaires when you are asked a series of scenario questions and then about 50 bizarre personality questions; pairs of completely unrelated statements and you have to choose which closest matches you, "you make decisions quickly" or "seeing other peoples points of view is important to you". Etc.


 
I absolutely detest those stupid things.  And the way subsequent questions are clearly check questions to validate previous answers - presumably to weed out people who just tick boxes at random!

Worse are the IQ type ones with spatial and verbal reasoning.  I had to do one of them a few years back online, under strict time limits, and failed it completely!


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## Bears (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I absolutely detest those stupid things.  And the way subsequent questions are clearly check questions to validate previous answers - presumably to weed out people who just tick boxes at random!
> 
> Worse are the IQ type ones with spatial and verbal reasoning.  I had to do one of them a few years back online, under strict time limits, and failed it completely!



They're awful aren't they? I failed a job interview with WHSmiths when I was a teenager because I failed to answer the question, 'What was your childhood like?' I still wonder what they were looking for with that one... 

And yet there's no pleasing me because I passed one of those verbal reasoning tests with flying colours and have been invited for a further exam with MENSA and I won't go because I'm so utterly disgusted with them. 

Wouldn't you rather just work for yourself sometimes?


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## Bears (Oct 29, 2013)

Bears said:


> They're awful aren't they? I failed a job interview with WHSmiths when I was a teenager because I failed to answer the question, 'What was your childhood like?' I still wonder what they were looking for with that one...
> 
> And yet there's no pleasing me because I passed one of those verbal reasoning tests with flying colours and have been invited for a further exam with MENSA and I won't go because I'm so utterly disgusted with them.
> 
> Wouldn't you rather just work for yourself sometimes?


Sorry Barney that was a little off topic. I hope at least 1HR department pulls their finger out. Sounds beyond frustrating.


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## barney_pig (Oct 29, 2013)

I have had several interviews involving competency questions recently. I detest them.


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## stuff_it (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> I have had several interviews involving competency questions recently. I detest them.


It's how it's done these days. Funny that since all this competency bollocks came out I've been unemployed.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> I have had several interviews involving competency questions recently. I detest them.


 
I've had that for many years at work - usually five core competencies, and two or three specialist ones if the job is very specific.  I suppose I'm used to them, having both been through interviews under that system, and sat in interview panels too.  Fairly straightforward once you get used to it - although writing your examples is never much fun.  I'd rather this system than personality tests, which I'd fail!


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## Manter (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I absolutely detest those stupid things.  And the way subsequent questions are clearly check questions to validate previous answers - presumably to weed out people who just tick boxes at random!
> 
> Worse are the IQ type ones with spatial and verbal reasoning.  I had to do one of them a few years back online, under strict time limits, and failed it completely!


I spectacularly failed a numerical reasoning test when I was last applying for jobs. The employer concerned decided to ignore the result on the basis I have an MBA and am ACCA qualified so probably able to add up - which begged the question, why administer the test if you're going to disregard the result??!!


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Manter said:


> I spectacularly failed a numerical reasoning test when I was last applying for jobs. The employer concerned decided to ignore the result on the basis I have an MBA and am ACCA qualified so probably able to add up - which begged the question, why administer the test if you're going to disregard the result??!!


 
I wonder whether employers just follow industry trends like sheep, so adopt a new screening method when it gains traction with their given industry, and all the while recognise it as a useful tool, but not to be followed blindly?  I bet the adoption of these stupid methods is the fault of HR departments flogging the latest shiny new HR tool to desperately try to prove their usefulness.  It is always the fault of HR!


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## equationgirl (Oct 29, 2013)

Manter said:


> I spectacularly failed a numerical reasoning test when I was last applying for jobs. The employer concerned decided to ignore the result on the basis I have an MBA and am ACCA qualified so probably able to add up - which begged the question, why administer the test if you're going to disregard the result??!!


Because there's a policy that says it must be administered no matter what. Count yourself lucky that common sense prevailed.

Our engineering graduate intake get given a numeracy test at the assessment centre


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## equationgirl (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> I've had that for many years at work - usually five core competencies, and two or three specialist ones if the job is very specific.  I suppose I'm used to them, having both been through interviews under that system, and sat in interview panels too.  Fairly straightforward once you get used to it - although writing your examples is never much fun.  I'd rather this system than personality tests, which I'd fail!


We're about to start our favourite part of the year - competency assessment. Each of use has to provide a minimum of 3 examples per competence to prove we're not shitter than last year. They changed the model last year so now there's a gazillion competences. It takes a good few hours to fill out the online form.


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## Bears (Oct 29, 2013)

equationgirl said:


> We're about to start our favourite part of the year - competency assessment. Each of use has to provide a minimum of 3 examples per competence to prove we're not shitter than last year. They changed the model last year so now there's a gazillion competences. It takes a good few hours to fill out the online form.


What an appalling waste of time. What if everyone just said 'no'?


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Bears said:


> What an appalling waste of time. What if everyone just said 'no'?


 
It is a total waste of time, especially as the link to performance pay has been broken with pay freezes.  It is an industry where I work - endless meeting to set the standards for the forthcoming year, telling staff to draft their objectives and ensure they align with the business plan, staff then set about collecting examples of good work during the year and there is a mid year appraisal and then the full annual appraisal. 

At the full appraisal time, more meetings are held to benchmark performance grades for all staff, where all the managers of staff of a certain grade meet to discuss the outliers - the exceptional performers and the under-performers.  So there is one of these meetings for every tier of manager.  I really have wanted to die at these meetings - they are atrociously awful.  It got so bad after a couple of years of them I volunteered to chair them so I could step back slightly and just make occasional nods at the clock to hurry up those who were wittering about their staff for too long. 

Although one year was good - the meeting was scheduled for about 11am one day, and they'd moved it forward to 9am at the last minute, and sent an e-mail round to the attendees some time after 5pm the day before.  I'd already left the office by then, and arrived in the office as planned at 10am the following day, only to find the e-mail once I'd logged on.  I wandered down to the room, and was _gutted_ to find that I'd arrived just as they were finishing.


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## story (Oct 29, 2013)

So now we have to repeatedly prove that we deserve our job, that we're worthy of even the  most basic wage.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

story said:


> So now we have to repeatedly prove that we deserve our job, that we're worthy of even the  most basic wage.


 
That's about the measure of it.  All aimed at getting rid of the poorest performers, and the surviving serfs just have to make do with progressive reductions in pay due to pay freezes.


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## Corax (Oct 29, 2013)

Bit late now, but I'd say to *NEVER* hand your notice in until you've had a starting date for the new position confirmed in writing.

But as that's already happened, what do you do for Sainsbury's?  Are you still on good terms with your boss etc?  Could you explain the situation, and postpone your leaving date - or get them to offer you 'casual' shifts?


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## equationgirl (Oct 29, 2013)

Bears said:


> What an appalling waste of time. What if everyone just said 'no'?


It's the system rolled out across the entire organisation, so saying no isn't possible no matter how much I would love to do that.


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## Bears (Oct 29, 2013)

I can see why you can't say no on your own. I'm imagining utopia where everyone says it.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Bears said:


> I can see why you can't say no on your own. I'm imagining utopia where everyone says it.


 
It used to be the case where I work that you could refuse to participate in it, but not sure if that has been changed.  Refusing didn't get you out of though, as your manager would just write a report on you regardless, so it is to your advantage to engage with it especially if you have a bad relationship with your manager.


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## bmd (Oct 29, 2013)

Nothing to add except my hope that you come through this with as few bruises as possible barney_pig. Good luck.


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## Yelkcub (Oct 29, 2013)

stuff_it said:


> No I can't, I got an 18 month ban.


Time og for good behaviour?


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## Wolveryeti (Oct 29, 2013)

Manter said:


> why administer the test if you're going to disregard the result??!!


Maybe it's occasionally of use as a get-out-of-jail-free card if they're ever challenged on why they didn't employ someone on the basis of equality legislation?


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## Manter (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> It is always the fault of HR!


I sort of work in HR 
and that's sad face for HR being blamed for all organisational dysfunction, not sadface at my career


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Manter said:


> I sort of work in HR
> and that's sad face for HR being blamed for all organisational dysfunction, not sadface at my career


 
So it is ALL YOUR FAULT!!!  

 

You're right that it isn't all HR, as organisations are normally profoundly dysfunctional, but certainly HR don't help in my experience.  Where I work they are the epitome of incompetence, and their failure to properly advice the business because they are useless means the business deals with the flak from grievances through to tribunals.  But nothing ever seems to change sadly.


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## Manter (Oct 29, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> So it is ALL YOUR FAULT!!!
> 
> 
> 
> You're right that it isn't all HR, as organisations are normally profoundly dysfunctional, but certainly HR don't help in my experience.  Where I work they are the epitome of incompetence, and their failure to properly advice the business because they are useless means the business deals with the flak from grievances through to tribunals.  But nothing ever seems to change sadly.



I work on trying to get HR departments up to speed and up to standard, so I wouldn't disagree


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## Puddy_Tat (Oct 29, 2013)

Manter said:


> I sort of work in HR


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Puddy_Tat said:


>


 
Burn her!


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## Manter (Oct 29, 2013)




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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 29, 2013)

Manter said:


>


 
Look on the bright side - if you let us burn you, you'll save money on your winter fuel bills. 

and so will we, mwahahaha!


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## equationgirl (Oct 30, 2013)

Bears said:


> I can see why you can't say no on your own. I'm imagining utopia where everyone says it.


I think many people would gladly tell them to shove it. But there's always a few who just shrug and do what they're told.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 30, 2013)

equationgirl said:


> I think many people would gladly tell them to shove it. But there's always a few who just shrug and do what they're told.


 
That's true at my workplace too - most people roll their eyes when it is that time of year, and it is generally viewed as something that just has to be done.  Grin and bear it for most people I think - people who are keen on it are viewed with some suspicion!


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## Bears (Oct 30, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:


> That's true at my workplace too - most people roll their eyes when it is that time of year, and it is generally viewed as something that just has to be done.  Grin and bear it for most people I think - people who are keen on it are viewed with some suspicion!


I suppose that's healthier than competency parties. I've worked in places with competency based recruitment and I've not been working for myself very long really, only 3.5 years, following an 18 month maternity leave. But it doesn't take very long for those systems to look like 1984. And I'm glad in a way that people do accept them although it pains me to say it, because I don't really want the public sector to grind to a halt.


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 30, 2013)

Bears said:


> I suppose that's healthier than competency parties. I've worked in places with competency based recruitment and I've not been working for myself very long really, only 3.5 years, following an 18 month maternity leave. But it doesn't take very long for those systems to look like 1984. And I'm glad in a way that people do accept them although it pains me to say it, because I don't really want the public sector to grind to a halt.


 
To be honest, the system just feels like part of the furniture - it is just something that is.  I suppose the same would be the case for other organisations running different systems - part of modern working life.


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## barney_pig (Oct 30, 2013)

The job interview was a waste if time. Fucking chuggers! Couldn't even pay enough to hold on to the pop up office to complete the interviews, ended up doing an interview in a corridor!
 But today found I'd reached the next stage of the boots temp job, and I have an interview for a really nice coffee shop on Saturday.
 Handed in a application form for tkmaxx, so thumbs are still on the job hunting front.
 Got the job centre plus interview on Friday, not looking forward to that.
Best bit of today was seeing an advert for Christmas temp in superdrug.
Popped in and found it was the concession store, 'the perfume shop' the application form begins with:  "what is your favourite ever fragrance, and why?"


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## farmerbarleymow (Oct 30, 2013)

Good luck with the Boots and the coffee shop jobs. 

I'd automatically be screened out of that perfume concession job if I answered honestly.  Which would be 'I think perfume stinks'.


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## Bears (Oct 30, 2013)

You're working so hard to get a job surely one of them must come up for you soon. I really hope so. We've been so negative about the whole process I wonder if we've been helpful in cheering you up at all? Many would have given up before now and I admire your determination in shitty circumstances when it really counts. Even if I think the employers are bastards for making you jump through all these hoops.


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## Thora (Oct 30, 2013)

My sister is in exactly the same situation at the moment, except she hasn't handed in her notice for her part time supermarket job yet.  Problem is new job is full time so she's had to increase her kid's nursery hours, but obviously is not getting paid full time money yet and has no idea when she will be!


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## equationgirl (Oct 31, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> The job interview was a waste if time. Fucking chuggers! Couldn't even pay enough to hold on to the pop up office to complete the interviews, ended up doing an interview in a corridor!
> But today found I'd reached the next stage of the boots temp job, and I have an interview for a really nice coffee shop on Saturday.
> Handed in a application form for tkmaxx, so thumbs are still on the job hunting front.
> Got the job centre plus interview on Friday, not looking forward to that.
> ...


Wishing you all the best barney, fingers are crossed for you


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## barney_pig (Oct 31, 2013)

Bears said:


> You're working so hard to get a job surely one of them must come up for you soon. I really hope so. We've been so negative about the whole process I wonder if we've been helpful in cheering you up at all? Many would have given up before now and I admire your determination in shitty circumstances when it really counts. Even if I think the employers are bastards for making you jump through all these hoops.


Everyone's has been brilliant, I have taken the advice about contacting my mp and also called my new manager this morning about trying to get started earlier, she will be calling me back.
 I knew I should have held on to the old job, but I hated it so much that staying any longer may have has bad results.
 I am keeping positive, and will get myself something soon.


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## chilango (Nov 3, 2013)

G'luck Barney.


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## barney_pig (Nov 7, 2013)

Reply from alok Sharma. mp. He has raised the issue with the director of the DBS to make sure my check is done as quickly as possible. He will write again when he gets an answer.


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## Quartz (Nov 7, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Reply from alok Sharma. mp. He has raised the issue with the director of the DBS to make sure my check is done as quickly as possible. He will write again when he gets an answer.



Hopefully you and your employer will receive the letters tomorrow.


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## barney_pig (Nov 12, 2013)

I telephoned the DBS today, my case was " accelerated on the 8th November and was now back from the police and being printed" it will be with us " by the end of the week"

Thankyou to everyone on here for all your help and support.


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## cesare (Nov 12, 2013)

Brilliant news barney!


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## Pingu (Nov 12, 2013)

great news.


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## Quartz (Nov 12, 2013)

Excellent news!


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## Bears (Nov 12, 2013)

Oh I was hoping that was why your thread was back!


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## equationgirl (Nov 12, 2013)

Wonderful news barney_pig


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## tony.c (Nov 12, 2013)

Good news, hope you get your starting date soon.


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## Greebo (Nov 12, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Reply from alok Sharma. mp. He has raised the issue with the director of the DBS to make sure my check is done as quickly as possible. He will write again when he gets an answer.


Glad to hear it, and not before bloody time.  I realise that it's not your MP's fault, but it's ridiculous that you've been kept waiting so long.


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## Ceej (Nov 12, 2013)

CRB/DBS returns are really random - they're coming back within three weeks at the moment in Camden but I have waited for 4 months before now.
Good news barney_pig!


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## barney_pig (Nov 14, 2013)

I am starting work Monday!
 Anyone visiting Floreys clinic will have a warm welcome.


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## cesare (Nov 14, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> I am starting work Monday!
> Anyone visiting Floreys clinic will have a warm welcome.


Yay!


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## ddraig (Nov 14, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> I am starting work Monday!
> Anyone visiting Floreys clinic will have a warm welcome.


brilliant  good luck


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## Bears (Nov 14, 2013)

Hooray! Now you can enjoy the weekend!


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## equationgirl (Nov 14, 2013)

Nice one barney_pig wishing you all the best for your new job


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## frogwoman (Nov 14, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> I am starting work Monday!
> Anyone visiting Floreys clinic will have a warm welcome.



So glad to hear this been keepin me fingers crossed x


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## Pickman's model (Nov 14, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> I am starting work Monday!
> Anyone visiting Floreys clinic will have a warm welcome.


congratulations


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## barney_pig (Nov 14, 2013)

By 4.30 Monday afternoon I will be on here griping about how crap my job is.


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## Pickman's model (Nov 14, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> By 4.30 Monday afternoon I will be on here griping about how crap my job is.


half four? i thought you'd be more a dinnertime man.


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## kittyP (Nov 14, 2013)

farmerbarleymow said:
			
		

> Obviously some slip through the net - I've encountered some thoroughly unpleasant members of staff in Boots who had a downright nasty personality.



Yes. 
Considering they are such huge company, you would think they would be more organised than independent pharmacies, but they always manage to fuck up my prescriptions and I get presented with a face like a slapped arse "computer says no" kinda thing. 
I only use many local pharmacy now, even if their other products are more expensive.


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## farmerbarleymow (Nov 14, 2013)

Great news its been sorted out - I'm really chuffed for you!  All the best for your new job and hope you settle in nicely. 



barney_pig said:


> By 4.30 Monday afternoon I will be on here griping about how crap my job is.



Don't you bloody dare!


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## kittyP (Nov 14, 2013)

equationgirl said:
			
		

> We're about to start our favourite part of the year - competency assessment. Each of use has to provide a minimum of 3 examples per competence to prove we're not shitter than last year. They changed the model last year so now there's a gazillion competences. It takes a good few hours to fill out the online form.



On top of your normal job? 
Do you do something where it's really dangerous if you make a mistake?


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## kittyP (Nov 14, 2013)

Sorry I've Cannuked the thread a bit


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## weepiper (Nov 14, 2013)

Excellent news barney


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## tony.c (Nov 15, 2013)

Congratulations barney! Some dosh for xmas then.


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## dessiato (Nov 15, 2013)

Good luck, really hope it works out for you, especially after all the pain getting to this stage.


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## Looby (Nov 15, 2013)

kittyP said:


> On top of your normal job?
> Do you do something where it's really dangerous if you make a mistake?



My mid-year appraisal stuff took 3 days to complete this year, some took longer.

Then a 2 hour meeting and 2 more hours of editing and correcting before moderation.

It's beyond fucking ridiculous. 

Good news on your job barney.


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## Thimble Queen (Nov 15, 2013)

nice one barney x


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## StoneRoad (Nov 17, 2013)

good news on the new job, Barney.
Enjoy.......


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## barney_pig (Nov 18, 2013)

Really hard work today, but brilliant!


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## Quartz (Nov 18, 2013)

barney_pig said:


> Really hard work today, but brilliant!



Really glad for you.


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