# Mysteries Of The North



## Orang Utan (Mar 7, 2015)

Why do fish n chip shops close so early?
Two attempts today. The first had just closed. At five o fucking clock. That's when they should fucking OPEN, not close 
Second one closed at 6.30. WTF?


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## Pickman's model (Mar 7, 2015)

what's it say on their opening hours thing?


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## DotCommunist (Mar 7, 2015)

There is a big Black Hound that devours those who dare seek a battered cod after dark. I've read my conan doyle


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## Pickman's model (Mar 7, 2015)

DotCommunist said:


> There is a big Black Hound that devours those who dare seek a battered cod after dark I've read my conan doyle


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## bi0boy (Mar 7, 2015)

I find only non-seaside crappy fish and chip shops stay open very late. The sort that might also sell kebabs or pizza. Or those in dives like Southend-on-sea mostly patronised at that sort of time by drunk east enders who couldn't tell their haddock from their Vietnamese river cobbler.

My 3 favourite seaside ones shut early:

Trenchers Whitby - 830pm
Mrs Ts Southwold 630pm
Frenches Wells-next-the-sea 730pm


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## sojourner (Mar 10, 2015)

Chippies used to be open way more than they are now.

When we used to come out of the pub, we'd all pour into the chippy. They're all fucking shut after 11 now 

The local Chipmunk is the worst offender. It's like flash opening hours or something - a half hour window and that's your lot!


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

Because they ran out of gravy.


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## lazythursday (Mar 10, 2015)

Where I grew up in the midlands chippies were always open in the evenings. That's when they are fucking needed, obviously. It was the same in Manchester but over here in Yorkshire you seem more likely to find them open for breakfast than at 7pm.


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## tufty79 (Mar 10, 2015)

The one near me closes some time after ten (pm)


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Because they ran out of gravy.


Gravy is not a pan-Northern thing. Salt and vinegar is the only thing for fish n chips where I grew up. Gravy's a bit moist.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Gravy is not a pan-Northern thing. Salt and vinegar is the only thing for fish n chips where I grew up. Gravy's a bit moist.





Fair point if you don't think its worth its salt. I loathe dry chips and vinegar doesn't always cut the mustard.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

I just find that stereotype foreign to me. The first time I encountered chips with gravy was in a Macc Lads song. Maybe it's a North Western thing.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Fair point if you don't think its worth its salt. I loathe dry chips and vinegar doesn't always cut the mustard.


Sodden chips eeeeeeewwwww


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## DotCommunist (Mar 10, 2015)

the idea with vinegar on chips is to give them a hefty swigs worth while the chips are piping hot, thus it steams off the excess and imbues the whole portion with a good vinegary flavour


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## cyberfairy (Mar 10, 2015)

When in York several years ago, there was a bakery that was open till the only hours. A good  hot cheese and onion pasty after a few drinks on the way home


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> I just find that stereotype foreign to me. The first time I encountered chips with gravy was in a Macc Lads song. Maybe it's a North Western thing.



I'm North East! The Macc Lads are from the Midlands lol. Tbh if dad went to the chippy he wouldn't come back with gravy. Mushy peas yeah, but not gravy. The gravy/curry sauce on chips mainly stemmed from when we were rudderless teens hanging around the local shops on an evening. We'd get chips or chips and *something* and the something would be a pattie, mushy peas, curry sauce or gravy. Never fish -  too expensive. We needed money for cigarettes too.


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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> I'm North East! The Macc Lads are from the Midlands lol. Tbh if dad went to the chippy he wouldn't come back with gravy. Mushy peas yeah, but not gravy. The gravy/curry sauce on chips mainly stemmed from when we were rudderless teens hanging around the local shops on an evening. We'd get chips or chips and *something* and the something would be a pattie, mushy peas, curry sauce or gravy. Never fish -  too expensive. We needed money for cigarettes too.



You forgot the mighty chips n scraps.   

Or, if you were really skint, just scraps.  Dirt cheap they were too.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You forgot the mighty chips n scraps.
> 
> Or, if you were really skint, just scraps.  Dirt cheap they were too.



I don't like batter so I hated scraps! Norton was like Billingham though, I see


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> I'm North East! The Macc Lads are from the Midlands lol.


The Macc Ladds were from Cheshire. They have gravy in that part of the North, clearly. And those Lancastrians.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You forgot the mighty chips n scraps.
> 
> Or, if you were really skint, just scraps.  Dirt cheap they were too.


Scraps were free in Leeds. But you had to buy chips at least. Never saw mushy peas either.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> The Macc Ladds were from Cheshire. They have gravy in that part of the North, clearly. And those Lancastrians.



Is Macclesfield in Cheshire? I've never checked so I won't dispute it. The only time I've ever visited was when we went to stay with my grandparents in Stoke on Trent, which is definitely the Midlands, so I mentally lumped it in with that.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Is Macclesfield in Cheshire? I've never checked so I won't dispute it. The only time I've ever visited was when we went to stay with my grandparents in Stoke on Trent, which is definitely the Midlands, so I mentally lumped it in with that.


Have you heard the Macc Lads? They are Northern as fuck.


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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> I don't like batter so I hated scraps! Norton was like Billingham though, I see



Weirdo.  Scraps are amazing.


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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Scraps were free in Leeds. But you had to buy chips at least. Never saw mushy peas either.



Same in Teesside - free with chips, but a nominal charge by themselves - pennies I think.   

Lovely greasy scraps.


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## Fez909 (Mar 10, 2015)

farmerbarleymow said:


> Same in Teesside - free with chips, but a nominal charge by themselves - pennies I think.
> 
> Lovely greasy scraps.


I remember getting a cone of scraps once. It was something like 5p. Covered them in salt and vinegar.

What a nutritionally bereft meal that is


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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 10, 2015)

Fez909 said:


> I remember getting a cone of scraps once. It was something like 5p. Covered them in salt and vinegar.
> 
> What a nutritionally bereft meal that is



May be nutritionally bereft, but fucking gorgeous.


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## Fez909 (Mar 10, 2015)

farmerbarleymow said:


> May be nutritionally bereft, but fucking gorgeous.


Indeed!

I rememeber my grand invention when I was a kid: take a big fat chip and break it in half. 'Dab' it on scraps until the entire exposed end is completed battered, then smoosh the chip back together.

It was like a savoury Lion Bar. Nom nom nom.

Fucking hell, my mouth is watering after typing that


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## Fez909 (Mar 10, 2015)

Just checked my chippy opening times...9pm!

(it's not great, though  )

I think I'm gonna have to go there now


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## harpo (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> I just find that stereotype foreign to me. The first time I encountered chips with gravy was in a Macc Lads song. Maybe it's a North Western thing.


 It's all a Macc Lad wunts


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Have you heard the Macc Lads? They are Northern as fuck.



Well she's got big knickers and she works at the sewage farm. I put my hand up her skirt and nearly lost half me arm.

That must be at least 30 years old.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

I couldn't believe, the size of her bum, she used to play for Wigan at the back of the scrum.

I'm surprised OU admits to being associated with it tbh.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

OU?


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> OU?


yes?


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> I couldn't believe, the size of her bum, she used to play for Wigan at the back of the scrum.
> 
> I'm surprised OU admits to being associated with it tbh.


with what?


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## Belushi (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> with what?



I must admit I never had you down as a Macc Lads fan


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Belushi said:


> I must admit I never had you down as a Macc Lads fan


i'm not!


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

you so are!


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## DaveCinzano (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> you so are!


He only liked their minimal techno period


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)




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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> you so are!


what makes you think that? if i'm a fan, then you must be too!
they were big at school in the late 80s. we thought they were _hilarious_


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## Belushi (Mar 10, 2015)

yeah it was macc lads and kevin bloody Wilson tapes used to circulate round my school


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Belushi said:


> yeah it was macc lads and kevin bloody Wilson tapes used to circulate round my school


and derek & clive and cheech & chong


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> what makes you think that? if i'm a fan, then you must be too!
> they were big at school in the late 80s. we thought they were _hilarious_



Which is how I know them. Although I thought they were shit. But it was a bit earlier than the late 80s when I heard them. And I'm sure I'm around your age. Maybe older by a year or two.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Which is how I know them. Although I thought they were shit. But it was a bit earlier than the late 80s when I heard them. And I'm sure I'm around your age. Maybe older by a year or two.


you might be right - perhaps the mid 80s. 
just checked - beer n sex n chips n gravy came out in 85 - their singer's real name was tristan


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

A lot of people argue it was satirical. 

Can't write good music? Form a novelty band! Lol


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> A lot of people argue it was satirical.


who did?


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

On here I think!  God, I can't be arsed searching. They were taking the piss out of piss head sexists. Sounds okay-ish.


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## Flavour (Mar 10, 2015)

Macc Lads and macclesfield in general are definitely the North

Stoke on trent is the north.

South of that you can start talking about midlands


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## Citizen66 (Mar 10, 2015)

Nah, Stoke on Trent is the midlands. It's Staffordshire.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Nah, Stoke on Trent is the midlands. It's Staffordshire.


staffordshire people have northern accents, so it feels like the north. same with derbyshire and nottinghamshire


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## Flavour (Mar 10, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Nah, Stoke on Trent is the midlands. It's Staffordshire.



have you been to stoke? it's not the fucking midlands.

midlands = birmingham, leicester, coventry, wolverhampton, that shite round that way. not stoke.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

We need a fucking forum for the North and another one for the Midlands. It's so insulting when you look at some of the niche forums there are out there. There must be 12 million people in the North, more than Scotland and fucking Wales combined.


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## Fez909 (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> We need a fucking forum for the North and another one for the Midlands. It's so insulting when you look at some of the niche forums there are out there. There must be 12 million people in the North, more than Scotland and fucking Wales combined.


That's 12000 times the number of people who go to DHFC games.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Fez909 said:


> That's 12000 times the number of people who go to DHFC games.



The crowd at DHFC games has a bigger GDP than the North I reckon. The world's poshest football team.


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## Belushi (Mar 11, 2015)




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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

14.5 million people live in the North of England, which is 900,000 more than the metropolitan population of that London.


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## ska invita (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> The crowd at DHFC games has a bigger GDP than the North I reckon. The world's poshest football team.


in my world people who can afford to go to prem games are posh


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## DaveCinzano (Mar 11, 2015)

Belushi said:


>


A poor turnout from Clapton Ultras there


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

ska invita said:


> in my world people who can afford to go to prem games are posh



I can't reply to this without getting in trouble.


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## ska invita (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> I can't reply to this without getting in trouble.


 soft northener


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Dulwich Dulwich Dulwich RA RA RA!

That's a good chant.


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## ska invita (Mar 11, 2015)




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## DaveCinzano (Mar 11, 2015)

ska invita said:


> soft northener


Easy on the tautologies, pal


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

DaveCinzano said:


> Easy on the tautologies, pal



Long Southener words. What's that - fucking LATIN or something?


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## ska invita (Mar 11, 2015)

.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

ska invita said:


> .



Something to do with cake by the sound of it.


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## ska invita (Mar 11, 2015)

DaveCinzano said:


> Easy on the tautologies, pal


dont call me pal, pal = i'll've taut you in a minute if you're not careful

(am i doing this right?)


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## ska invita (Mar 11, 2015)

whats this thread about again? 
very mysterious....


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## ska invita (Mar 11, 2015)

imagine 12million posters worth of this....


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## DaveCinzano (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> Long Southener words. What's that - fucking LATIN or something?





ska invita said:


> dont call me pal, pal = i'll've taut you in a minute if you're not careful


If you don't wind in the nawtiness you'll get a dry slap and a Dulwich Grimace, sunshine


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## Belushi (Mar 11, 2015)

Has Orang Utan found a chip shop that's open yet?


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Belushi said:


> Has Orang Utan found a chip shop that's open yet?



I'm imagining a Yorkshire equivalent of the Yellow Pages J.R. Hartley advert, as he sullenly walks round the streets only to be greeted by "closed" signs...


.........UNTIL....


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

Belushi said:


> Has Orang Utan found a chip shop that's open yet?


I didn't while I was up there. Had to settle for _pizza_ instead. Pfff.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

Flavour said:


> have you been to stoke? it's not the fucking midlands.
> 
> midlands = birmingham, leicester, coventry, wolverhampton, that shite round that way. not stoke.



Of course I've been there, that's where my dad was from. Funnily enough he regarded it as the Midlands too.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

Are people seriously suggesting that the North stretches from the borders all the way to South of Staffordshire, then the Midlands is a tiny strip stretching from Birmingham across to Leicester and then it's the south?


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## lazythursday (Mar 11, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Of course I've been there, that's where my dad was from. Funnily enough he regarded it as the Midlands too.


The government regards it as the midlands too, part of the west midlands region. But I think Stoke has more in common with north west towns really and should be claimed for the north.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Are people seriously suggesting that the North stretches from the borders all the way to South of Staffordshire, then the Midlands is a tiny strip stretching from Birmingham across to Leicester and then it's the south?



Stoke is the Midlands. Granada and BBC North-West don't include it in their regional news.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

Exactly. Fair point on the accent though as my Grandma was forever saying Duck. Leek looks more northern than the actual north too.


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## Sprocket. (Mar 11, 2015)

South starts in a line across the country from Birdwell roundabout on t'M1 according to that erstwhile publication _The Barnsley Chronicle._


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

If you've got a northern accent, you're northern. 
Midlanders need to pick a side. They're either north or south.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> If you've got a northern accent, you're northern.
> Midlanders need to pick a side. They're either north or south.



Stoke is a bit of a freaky accent though. It's not out-and-out northern.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> Stoke is a bit of a freaky accent though. It's not out-and-out northern.



And Birmingham can't really be described as a southern accent.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

I would like to hear everyone on Urban's accent and that could be a thread unless it's bindun.


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## lazythursday (Mar 11, 2015)

I would draw an extremely wiggly boundary that included outposts such as Stoke but ceded much of Cheshire. It would grab the northern half of Derbyshire too (clearly the Peaks are ours) but Nottinghamshire gave up its right to be considered northern thanks to the UDM and the scab miners.


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## eightball (Mar 11, 2015)

Flavour said:


> have you been to stoke? it's not the fucking midlands.
> 
> midlands = birmingham, leicester, coventry, wolverhampton, that shite round that way. not stoke.



The Midlands/North border debate? This is my proposed solution:

Switch your TV to channel 3 - if you get Central TV you're in the Midlands, if you get Granada TV you're in the North.

Stoke is in the Midlands, Cheshire is in the North.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> And Birmingham can't really be described as a southern accent.


Not northern = southern


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

eightball said:


> The Midlands/North border debate? This is my proposed solution:
> 
> Switch your TV to channel 3 - if you get Central TV you're in the Midlands, if you get Granada TV you're in the North.
> 
> Stoke is in the Midlands, Cheshire is in the North.


What if you don't watch tv?
And you're happy to let other people decide this?


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## Belushi (Mar 11, 2015)

This is exactly why its the Midlands and the North forum :thumbs :


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## mr steev (Mar 11, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Not northern = southern



Which almost sounds like a typical southern attitude 

I'm sure Northerners and Midlanders alike have had to put up with the attitude that the South (South East really) is the center of the UK and nothing else much matters outside. Which is why most Midlanders share more of an affinity with Northerners. But that doesn't make us Northerners

And Stoke is in the Midlands. Anything above is the North


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## mr steev (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> I would like to hear everyone on Urban's accent and that could be a thread unless it's bindun.



It's been done I think

But a Stoke accent is nothing like a Black Country accent, which is nothing like a Nottingham accent, which is nothing like a Rugby accent, so it wouldn't prove much


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

mr steev said:


> It's been done I think
> 
> But a Stoke accent is nothing like a Black Country accent, which is nothing like a Nottingham accent, which is nothing like a Rugby accent, so it wouldn't prove much



As I said, a freaky accent. I'd just like to hear everyone's voices really, so that we can mark out all of the RP abominations on here for The List.


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## mr steev (Mar 11, 2015)

http://www.urban75.net/forums/threads/post-your-accents.274844/

eta: seems like the links have expired


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## Flavour (Mar 11, 2015)

Since when was the London BBC an authority on Northern matters?


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

Flavour said:


> Since when was the London BBC an authority on Northern matters?



Staffordshire is sandwiched between Derbyshire and Shropshire. How can it not be the Midlands?

It's on the same latitude as Wales.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Staffordshire is sandwiched between Derbyshire and Shropshire. How can it not be the Midlands?
> 
> It's on the same latitude as Wales.


Cos of the accents.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Cos of the accents.



Well by that logic parts of London, if some of the White youth are anything to go by, should be classed as The Carribean.


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## DaveCinzano (Mar 11, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Cos of the accents.


What, like Shane Meadows, who is from Staffordshire, whom you have complimented for being “great with bleak Midlands shitehole locations too”?

When you wrote that, Meadows had made _Small Time_ (set in Nottinghamshire), _Twenty Four Seven _(filmed in Nottinghamshire, Derbyshire and Cheshire), _A Room For Romeo Brass_ (filmed in Staffordshire, Nottinghamshire and Lincolnshire), _Once Upon A Time In The Midlands _(set and filmed in Nottinghamshire) and _Dead Man's Shoes _(filmed and set in central Derbyshire).

You will note that some of the ‘bleak Midlands shitehole locations’ used by Meadows include Matlock (Derbyshire), Chapel St Leonards (Lincolnshire) and Macclesfield (Cheshire). Each of these are around 20km north of Stoke and 40km north of Stafford (both Staffordshire).


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)




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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

The files


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## DaveCinzano (Mar 11, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> The files


I can neither confirm nor deny that there are any so-called “files” held on posters including but not limited to Orang Utan.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

DaveCinzano said:


> What, like Shane Meadows, who is from Staffordshire, whom you have complimented for being “great with bleak Midlands shitehole locations too”?
> 
> When you wrote that, Meadows had made _Small Time_ (set in Nottinghamshire), _Twenty Four Seven _(filmed in Nottinghamshire, Derbyshire and Cheshire), _A Room For Romeo Brass_ (filmed in Staffordshire, Nottinghamshire and Lincolnshire), _Once Upon A Time In The Midlands _(set and filmed in Nottinghamshire) and _Dead Man's Shoes _(filmed and set in central Derbyshire).
> 
> You will note that some of the ‘bleak Midlands shitehole locations’ used by Meadows include Matlock (Derbyshire), Chapel St Leonards (Lincolnshire) and Macclesfield (Cheshire). Each of these are around 20km north of Stoke and 40km north of Stafford (both Staffordshire).


What the fuck does he know? Stupid Northern twat


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## DaveCinzano (Mar 11, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> What the fuck does he know? Stupid Northern twat


Trolling yourself? Now that's desperate


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

DaveCinzano said:


> Trolling yourself? Now that's desperate


No, Meadows!


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## Flavour (Mar 11, 2015)

I'd say Staffordshire is culturally more Northern than Cheshire, which is like a pocket of the South East in the North West - they have fucking Gideon for an MP in Tatton.


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## Shirl (Mar 11, 2015)

What's all this got to do with chippy opening times


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

Shirl said:


> What's all this got to do with chippy opening times


Nowt, but this thread is for all mysteries of the north, even in the disputed territories.


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## Shirl (Mar 11, 2015)

If it's below Lancashire and Yorkshire it's not northern.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 11, 2015)

Shirl said:


> If it's below Lancashire and Yorkshire it's not northern.



That includes Orang Utan then. And me on week days.


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## Fez909 (Mar 11, 2015)

Shirl said:


> If it's below Lancashire and Yorkshire it's not northern.


It's not that simple. Parts of Yorkshire are below parts of Derbyshire. And parts of Derbyshire are below parts of Staffordshire.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Well done for starting a debate that makes it look like one forum's the right idea you bellends.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> Well done for starting a debate that makes it look like one forum's the right idea you bellends.


Hey no need to get upset. It's just daftness. No one means any of it. Who gives a shit really?


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Hey no need to get upset. It's just daftness. No one means any of it. Who gives a shit really?



I'm not upset. I was joining in.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> I'm not upset. I was joining in.


Soz. Hard to tell sometimes who's being serious and who's being silly.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Soz. Hard to tell sometimes who's being serious and who's being silly.



Yeah course. I don't use smileys if I can help it so no tone.


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## Favelado (Mar 11, 2015)

You Yorkshire bastard.


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## Orang Utan (Mar 11, 2015)

Favelado said:


> You Yorkshire bastard.


I'm not even from Yorkshite


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## Citizen66 (Mar 12, 2015)

Fez909 said:


> It's not that simple. Parts of Yorkshire are below parts of Derbyshire. And parts of Derbyshire are below parts of Staffordshire.



I blame the Britons from days of yore who clearly couldn't draw straight lines.


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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 12, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> I'm not even from Yorkshite


You're from Surrey aren't you?


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## DaveCinzano (Mar 12, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> Hey no need to get upset. It's just daftness. No one means any of it.



Speak for yourself


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## Orang Utan (Mar 12, 2015)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You're from Surrey aren't you?


Sarawak


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## Citizen66 (Mar 12, 2015)

Your dad worked in the oil and gas industry? My uncle lived in Borneo for a few years.


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## QueenOfGoths (Mar 12, 2015)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You forgot the mighty chips n scraps.
> 
> Or, if you were really skint, just scraps.  Dirt cheap they were too.


We used to have fish and chips every Saturday lunch time from Greasy Joe's (not his real name or the name of his shop of course!) in Skipton. Me, Mum and Dad. We'd get fish and chips twice with a fish and scraps.

Ahhhhh, scraps.....*starts to dribble*


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## Orang Utan (Mar 12, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Your dad worked in the oil and gas industry? My uncle lived in Borneo for a few years.


My dad's habitat was supplanted by the oil and gas industry.  He found refuge in academia over here. Ook!


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## discokermit (Mar 12, 2015)

Orang Utan said:


> If you've got a northern accent, you're northern.
> Midlanders need to pick a side. They're either north or south.


you're all cunts. so are the brummies. east midlanders are fucking weird. shropshire is full of deliverance cunts. staffordshire is full of six fingered pottery cunts. derbyshire is full of thick sheepshaggers.
the black country needs not take sides as it is superior to north, south, east and west. mind you, half the black country are cunts. and most of the people i know.
actually, it's only me and my dad who aren't cunts. and he's a cunt.


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## Part 2 (Mar 15, 2015)

Stoke isn't a northern accent, it's midlands. 

No-one in the north refers to people as duck, yowth and shag.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 15, 2015)

oh yeah, youth; I forgot about that.


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## coley (Mar 15, 2015)

farmerbarleymow said:


> You forgot the mighty chips n scraps.
> 
> Or, if you were really skint, just scraps.  Dirt cheap they were too.


Scraps! You mean scramshuns, bliddy southerner!


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## coley (Mar 15, 2015)

Favelado said:


> We need a fucking forum for the North and another one for the Midlands. It's so insulting when you look at some of the niche forums there are out there. There must be 12 million people in the North, more than Scotland and fucking Wales combined.


But first we must define the "North" owt North of the Wear would be my choice, and I'm being considerate and open minded


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## Favelado (Mar 15, 2015)

Actually I want a forum for what was known as "Granadaland" by our continuity announcers in the 80s and 90s. Then I want an acutal country called that. The flag can be that yellow G with an arrow on a blue background. Lucy Meacock can be president.


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## coley (Mar 15, 2015)

QueenOfGoths said:


> We used to have fish and chips every Saturday lunch time from Greasy Joe's (not his real name or the name of his shop of course!) in Skipton. Me, Mum and Dad. We'd get fish and chips twice with a fish and scraps.
> 
> Ahhhhh, scraps.....*starts to dribble*


Every Saturday?
Adds name to list.


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## coley (Mar 15, 2015)

Favelado said:


> Actually I want a forum for what was known as "Granadaland" by our continuity announcers in the 80s and 90s. Then I want an acutal country called that. The flag can be that yellow G with an arrow on a blue background. Lucy Meacock can be president.


If you get "Look North" then you are Northern, will accept those in the 'outer regions'  or 'provinces' as they are referred to by the RP brigade


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## Favelado (Mar 15, 2015)

I really would like independence for the North of England but it's not really got much support. I bet a referendum would get a "no" vote of 85%.

Stockholm syndrome.


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## discokermit (Mar 15, 2015)

i hate the entire ancient kingdom of northumbria. cunts.


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## Favelado (Mar 15, 2015)

discokermit said:


> i hate the entire ancient kingdom of northumbria. cunts.



Fucking Mercian. You're all miserable wankers.


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## Patteran (Mar 15, 2015)

Favelado said:


> Actually I want a forum for what was known as "Granadaland" by our continuity announcers in the 80s and 90s. Then I want an acutal country called that. The flag can be that yellow G with an arrow on a blue background. Lucy Meacock can be president.



All Granadaland forum posts will be in Stymie Bold italic.


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## discokermit (Mar 15, 2015)

Favelado said:


> Fucking Mercian. You're all miserable wankers.


living next door to the welsh. it rubs off on you.


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## Favelado (Mar 15, 2015)

Patteran said:


> All Granadaland forum posts will be in Stymie Bold italic.



I love this post.


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## coley (Mar 16, 2015)

Favelado said:


> I really would like independence for the North of England but it's not really got much support. I bet a referendum would get a "no" vote of 85%.
> 
> Stockholm syndrome.


74% ish against when we had the vote! though it was being championed by Prescott which may have influenced the outcome


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## farmerbarleymow (Mar 16, 2015)

coley said:


> But first we must define the "North" owt North of the Wear would be my choice, and I'm being considerate and open minded


By that definition, the North would be populated solely by barbarians, wandering around covered in woad. It's those of us in the rest of the North that exert a civilising influence on you lot north of the Wear.


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## Citizen66 (Mar 16, 2015)

coley said:


> If you get "Look North" then you are Northern, will accept those in the 'outer regions'  or 'provinces' as they are referred to by the RP brigade



Mike Neville ftw.


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## coley (Mar 16, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> Mike Neville ftw.


http://playlists.net/artists/Jez+Lowe/track/1926957/Mike+Neville+Said+It+(So+It+Must+Be+True)


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## Favelado (Mar 16, 2015)

Good Morning. DEATH TO THE SOUTH.


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## JTG (Mar 16, 2015)

*watches from sidelines and ponders arms sales to all sides*


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## Citizen66 (Mar 16, 2015)

We need to draw up plans for our invasion of the softy forum.


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## Favelado (Mar 16, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> We need to draw up plans for our invasion of the softy forum.



First we need to dress like them. We should dress up in top hats, monocles and pink Dulwich Hamlet scarves to look posh.


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## Roadkill (Mar 16, 2015)

Citizen66 said:


> We need to draw up plans for our invasion of the softy forum.



Similar tactics as with MWWP?


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## Citizen66 (Mar 16, 2015)

Roadkill said:


> Similar tactics as with MWWP?



We'd need to get the mods on side because ip addresses.


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