# Cabinet reshuffle thread



## DotCommunist (Sep 3, 2012)

Apparently we are due some details of the upcoming reshuffle later today.So predictions and discussion herein.

I was thinking that now Lansleys got the fuck-the-nhs bill through he might be moving on to pastures new, but on the other hand maybe the pm wants to keep him in place to take the flak when the extent of the fuck up becomes clear?


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 3, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> Apparently we are due some details of the upcoming reshuffle later today.So predictions and discussion herein.
> 
> I was thinking that now Lansleys got the fuck-the-nhs bill through he might be moving on to pastures new, but on the other hand maybe the pm wants to keep him in place to take the flak when the extent of the fuck up becomes clear?


 
Well, that does presuppose that Cameron gives a toss about the flak unless and until it directly affects him, and shuffling Lansley won't affect that. He's unlikely to shuffle Gideon, although he may take away the "election strategist" portfolio, and he's unlikely to move Iain Duncan Shit of Grayling, because their fuckwittery supposedly appeals to the Tory grassroots.
Probably some of the minor Cabinet members will  do job swapsies, and some remits will be curbed or expanded.


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## elbows (Sep 3, 2012)

Warsi was pretty much begging in public the other day to keep her present role - I'm a woman, I'm not white, I'm northern, I'm working class, you need meeeee!


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## DotCommunist (Sep 3, 2012)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-19462469


Laws to return


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## 8115 (Sep 3, 2012)

I think it's going to be underwhelming, just tinkering.


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## SpookyFrank (Sep 3, 2012)

elbows said:


> Warsi was pretty much begging in public the other day to keep her present role - I'm a woman, I'm not white, I'm northern, I'm working class, you need meeeee!


 
Wow. A sellout on four counts. She must be so proud of herself.


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## 8115 (Sep 3, 2012)

The subtext to this reshuffle is "look at all this talent we've got in the conservative party, but also, look, we've already got exactly the right people in the top jobs".  Oxygen of publicity, to be honest.  I'm pretty sure they did this all the way through the nineties too.


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## DotCommunist (Sep 3, 2012)

SpookyFrank said:


> Wow. A sellout on four counts. She must be so proud of herself.


 

she doesn't seem to actually do anything either


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## Minnie_the_Minx (Sep 3, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> Well, that does presuppose that Cameron gives a toss about the flak unless and until it directly affects him, and shuffling Lansley won't affect that. He's unlikely to shuffle Gideon, although he may take away the "election strategist" portfolio, and he's unlikely to move Iain Duncan Shit of Grayling, because their fuckwittery supposedly appeals to the Tory grassroots.
> Probably some of the minor Cabinet members will do job swapsies, and some remits will be curbed or expanded.


 




> Housing minister Grant Shapps, employment minister Chris Grayling and minister for disabled people Maria Miller are among Conservatives tipped for promotion.


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## SpookyFrank (Sep 3, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> she doesn't seem to actually do anything either


 
Party chairman ain't she? I've always thought that was sort of a parking spot for especially useless politicians who for whatever reason would be problematic or inconvenient to do away with completely.

In the case of Eric Pickles, the problem was presumably just the sheer mechanics of removing him from his chair.


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## SpookyFrank (Sep 3, 2012)

> _Housing minister Grant Shapps, employment minister Chris Grayling and minister for disabled people Maria Miller are among Conservatives tipped for promotion._


 
Yes. Because housing, employment and the plight of the disabled have all improved so drastically under the tories that those responsible deserve to be promoted.

Either that or Cameron is simply rewarding his most ruthless hatchet men.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 3, 2012)

Minnie_the_Minx said:


>


 
To where?
I mean, I see Grayling as a mean Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster (the booby prize of Cabinet seats), but I wouldn't trust him with anything more complex than a small Hornby train set. Miller is just fucking incompetent, and Shittshas accomplished the sum of fuck all in terms of actual *housing*.


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## Minnie_the_Minx (Sep 3, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> To where?
> I mean, I see Grayling as a mean Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster (the booby prize of Cabinet seats), but I wouldn't trust him with anything more complex than a small Hornby train set. Miller is just fucking incompetent, and Shittshas accomplished the sum of fuck all in terms of actual *housing*.


 
Dunno.  Minister for the Cabinet Office?  Mo Mowlam always said it was a non-job


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 3, 2012)

Minnie_the_Minx said:


> Dunno. Minister for the Cabinet Office? Mo Mowlam always said it was a non-job


 
Only Minister for the Cabinet Office if "cabinet office" is a euphemism for "toilet".


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## Fez909 (Sep 3, 2012)

I reckon Gove will be the headline loser.


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## articul8 (Sep 3, 2012)

No he might move sideways - to health or something.  Ken Clark and George Younger tipped as losers.


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## DotCommunist (Sep 3, 2012)

Gove? He's managed to earn the complete hatred of everyone from Head level downwards. But will he go, I'm not so sure. I think Cam might be enamored of his 'make tests harder' 'traditional teaching' bollocks. Although I may be wrong, I frequently am


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## articul8 (Sep 3, 2012)

Yes, but in the eyes of the Tories he's done a good job.


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## 19sixtysix (Sep 3, 2012)

Moving shit about only smears it to the walls.


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## elbows (Sep 3, 2012)

If they want to reward Hunt for being an effective heatsink, what role will they give him?

I cant quite picture Gove moving since he has cast a big impression of owning the education agenda, we shall see.

Unless all the journalists have been briefed wrong this reshuffle doesnt offer many scraps to briefly lift the mood. I might have to content myself with dregs such as Spelman perhaps losing her job, a job which she seems to be pretty bad at. The no forest sell-off was an early u-turn for the government, her son got banned from rugby for steroid use and they tried to keep it out of the press by legal means, and her constituency isnt too far from me so she is vaguely on my radar.


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## stavros (Sep 3, 2012)

Fez909 said:


> I reckon Gove will be the headline loser.


 
Gove has always been a loser, so I doubt it'll make headlines.


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## stavros (Sep 3, 2012)

elbows said:


> Warsi was pretty much begging in public the other day to keep her present role - I'm a woman, I'm not white, I'm northern, I'm working class, you need meeeee!


 
Never been elected to public office either.


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## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

No surprises yet. Gove stays, Warsi goes, whip goes, Ken Clarke loses clear departmental role. I suppose some in the press seem surprised that IDS isnt moving.


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## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

Lansley gone from health


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## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

elbows said:


> Lansley gone from health


 

my crystal ball was right


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## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

If this turned out to be true then there is much bashing of idiots to be done in future:

Via the BBC live reshuffle updates page:

Telegraph reporting 'Rumours that Jeremy Hunt could go to Health in place of Andrew Lansley.'


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## likesfish (Sep 4, 2012)

Warrsi is down 
 Actually liked dave for a minute there


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## frogwoman (Sep 4, 2012)

Is Gove staying where he is then?


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## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

frogwoman said:


> Is Gove staying where he is then?


 
Yes.

Oh god Hunt is heath secretary, let the fun commence


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## Balbi (Sep 4, 2012)

Grayling at Justice. That's a homophobic man who complains that people have too many rights, as Justice sec,


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## Ash Mahay (Sep 4, 2012)

elbows said:


> Ken Clarke loses clear departmental role.



Hes been given a floating economic brief, which is good for me as it means for the first time since he was chancellor I get to drag out my old Ken Clarke story.

In around 1980 I was part of a trip to the house of commons & we met Ken Clarke (I was living in Nottingham at the time) & he was asked about his political ambitions to which he responded that he would never be the chancellor as his maths wasnt good enough.

The rest is history and leaves the question who was wrong about Clarkes ability, his employers, or the man himself?


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## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

So we've got a tax avoiding dickhead for Health. Gr8.

omg



> As Culture Secretary, Hunt is also responsible for security at the London Olympic Games 2012


 
so he also can't organise a piss up in a brewery.


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## Libertad (Sep 4, 2012)

Balbi said:


> Grayling at Justice. That's a homophobic man who complains that people have too many rights, as Justice sec,


 
...and a proven liar.


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## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> So we've got a tax avoiding dickhead for Health. Gr8.
> 
> omg
> 
> ...


 
I'm sure he'll be fine until Rupert Murdoch announces plans to open hospitals, perhaps ones specialising in memory problems.


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## Libertad (Sep 4, 2012)

Ash Mahay said:


> Hes been given a floating economic brief, which is good for me as it means for the first time since he was chancellor I get to drag out my old Ken Clarke story.
> 
> In around 1980 I was part of a trip to the house of commons & we met Ken Clarke (I was living in Nottingham at the time) & he was asked about his political ambitions to which he responded that he would never be the chancellor as his maths wasnt good enough.
> 
> The rest is history and leaves the question who was wrong about Clarkes ability, his employers, or the man himself?


 
Your life's very filmic innit? One crazy merry-go-round of excitement.


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## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

Balbi said:


> Grayling at Justice. That's a homophobic man who complains that people have too many rights, as Justice sec,


 
Apparently IDS was first choice for this position but turned it down.


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## nino_savatte (Sep 4, 2012)

Jezza Rhyming-Slang is the Major Major of the cabinet





> It was then, as I stood on the steps with my Blackberry, that I spotted the then new Secretary of State for Culture Jeremy Hunt in the middle distance, walking across the square. He was walking fast and was glued to his mobile phone. He was heading in my direction, towards the Murdoch drinks party. I don't know whether he saw me, or if something else diverted him, but he suddenly changed direction and darted to the side of the square and over towards a large tree.
> 
> http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/i...hind-a-tree-before-dinner-with-james-murdoch/


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## nino_savatte (Sep 4, 2012)

Greening's been shunted into the Overseas Development sidings.


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## happie chappie (Sep 4, 2012)

elbows said:


> Apparently IDS was first choice for this position but turned it down.


 
As mentioned on Newsnight last night, I can’t really see the point of reshuffles. It’s polices that are the problem, not the individual post holders. 

The vast majority of the general public couldn’t name most of the Cabinet even when shown their photos and even then they couldn’t give a toss so I don’t think it makes any difference to a Government’s popularity either way. At best, it rewards ambitious toadies and potential trouble makers.

In fact, there’s an argument for keeping ministers in post for as long as possible (as long as they, as individuals, aren't making a complete fuck up of their brief) simply because it must take quite a long time to get to grips with a department, the issues it faces, and the civil servants who essentially run it.


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## happie chappie (Sep 4, 2012)

nino_savatte said:


> Greening's been shunted into the Overseas Development sidings.


 
Strangely enough, I was told by someone who works in international development that Mitchell was a reasonably well-respected minister, certainly compared to some others.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

Interesting shuffle which presages some major legislative cuntitude, IMO. Why else put Hunt at Health, Grayling at Justice etc? They're there to oversee an extra turn of the screws or three.


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## tommers (Sep 4, 2012)

There's a column in the telegraph saying that IDS was due to move to Justice, at Gideon's behest, as G wants "extra billions in welfare cuts" and knows IDS is unwilling to play ball - but he refused.


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## DexterTCN (Sep 4, 2012)

Hunt seems to be anti-choice?

http://www.publicwhip.org.uk/divisi...remy_Hunt&mpc=South_West_Surrey&house=commons


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## nino_savatte (Sep 4, 2012)

happie chappie said:


> Strangely enough, I was told by someone who works in international development that Mitchell was a reasonably well-respected minister, certainly compared to some others.


I heard this as well but for Greening, this is a step backwards.


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## killer b (Sep 4, 2012)

tommers said:


> There's a column in the telegraph saying that IDS was due to move to Justice, at Gideon's behest, as G wants "extra billions in welfare cuts" and knows IDS is unwilling to play ball - but he refused.


hmm. sounds like pro IDS bullshit to me.


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## treelover (Sep 4, 2012)

Libertad said:


> ...and a proven liar.


 

Grayling at Justice, ffs, this is the man who on Newsnight, claimed that benefit tribunals were allowing too many appeals, there is something seriously wrong with some of these Tories, nut just the fact they are tories..


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## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

Grayling's not a lawyer, either, is he?


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## ruffneck23 (Sep 4, 2012)

i just think the Tories are trying to take every single thing they can before they get ceremonioulsy booted out and hopefully burnt at the stake


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## treelover (Sep 4, 2012)

Slash and burn, shock doctrine, the Chile experiment


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

It looks like HS2 and the third runway are the big dividing issues in the Conservative party.


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

*Gets a tent out*


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## kebabking (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> ...Hunt at Health...


 
no idea about Greyling, but what i've heard about Hunt is that he's considered a harmless fool - if he's being given Health its because Cameron is fed up with getting stick regarding Health, and he wants the Dept to retreat into a few years of masterful inactivity. this isn't the 'safe pair of hands' that all PM's crave, but more that fcukups caused by an SofS/dept's who failed are better politically than a fuckups caused by a SofS with a daft idea in his head who runs about smearing shit on everything he touches.

Defence appears untouched, which is probably a good thing.

overall, it looks to me like it just demonstrates the paucity of talent in the commons generally - its all just 40yo PPE graduates who've never done a real job, and have no experience of anything outside of a  decent education, university, graduate level job in the professions, a party hack job, 'advisor' to a minister in their mid-20's, MP, PPS, shadow minister and then cabinet minister.

frightening really...


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## the button (Sep 4, 2012)

I really really hope (without much chance of it happening) that Grayling's replacement as welfare minister will be a LibDem.


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## junglevip (Sep 4, 2012)

elbows said:


> Yes.
> 
> Oh god Hunt is heath secretary, let the fun commence


 
This is fucking terrifying news.


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## stethoscope (Sep 4, 2012)

OMFG. Grayling at Justice, Hunt at Health, Miller at Women and Equalities.

I feel a bit ill right now


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

Have any lib dems got a job yet?  Is Cable still business secretary?

Maybe tomorrow is lib dem day.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

kebabking said:


> no idea about Greyling, but what i've heard about Hunt is that he's considered a harmless fool - if he's being given Health its because Cameron is fed up with getting stick regarding Health, and he wants the Dept to retreat into a few years of masterful inactivity. this isn't the 'safe pair of hands' that all PM's crave, but more that fcukups caused by an SofS/dept's who failed are better politically than a fuckups caused by a SofS with a daft idea in his head who runs about smearing shit on everything he touches.
> 
> Defence appears untouched, which is probably a good thing.
> 
> ...


 
What's sad is that once upon a time PPE wasn't really a subject you merely studied at undergrad level, it was supposed to be a base for at least a post-grad degree, if not a doctorate. As it is, our current crop of warthogs seem to have seen it as a stepping stone into (pardon the pun) politics - an end in and of itself, or a necessary trial on the path to power.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

the button said:


> I really really hope (without much chance of it happening) that Grayling's replacement as welfare minister will be a LibDem.


 
The thief Laws?


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

Yvette Cooper on twitter (via the Guardian)

So looks like 3 of 5 women (Spelman, Gillan, Warsi) & 1 of 19 men (Young) sacked from cabinet posts. Shows Cameron's attitude to women


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## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> The thief Laws?


The thief laws is now education minister. He would only have replaced teather if Clegg was supportive. Cleggs wrecking ball is on form this week.


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## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> Yvette Cooper on twitter (via the Guardian)
> 
> So looks like 3 of 5 women (Spelman, Gillan, Warsi) & 1 of 19 men (Young) sacked from cabinet posts. Shows Cameron's attitude to women


 

yes, thats really the important issue here


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## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> Yvette Cooper on twitter (via the Guardian)
> 
> So looks like 3 of 5 women (Spelman, Gillan, Warsi) & 1 of 19 men (Young) sacked from cabinet posts. Shows Cameron's attitude to women


Teather as well. Not a single non-white minister now.


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> yes, thats really the important issue here


 
It does help, you know.


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## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

urgh, reading hunts bio. magdelene oxford etc. as per


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## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> It does help, you know.


 

perhaps, I'm just more concerned that the people put in place are incompetents and yesmen. And thieves.


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## purves grundy (Sep 4, 2012)

so who's at DFID?


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## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

Justine Greening


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## kebabking (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> Yvette Cooper on twitter (via the Guardian)
> 
> So looks like 3 of 5 women (Spelman, Gillan, Warsi) & 1 of 19 men (Young) sacked from cabinet posts. Shows Cameron's attitude to women


 
firstly you can argue about the numbers - has Lansley gone from health to LoC because he'll be a great LoC, or because he's a catastrophe at Health (and probably everything else), and LoC is the place he'll do least damage whilst not causing Cameron a problem on the backbenches?

secondly, of the three women you've mentioned, two of them have been demonstratably crap at their jobs (i've no idea about Gillan) - should they be in government because they're women?


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## Brixton Hatter (Sep 4, 2012)

Hunt as SoS for Health, fucking hell! He's anti abortion, is suspected of taking donations from US pharma companies, and called the NHS a '60 year mistake' with colleagues in a book which called for the dismantling of the NHS.

Be afraid. The tory plan looks to be to starve the NHS of cash until it looks completely shit, then use that as an excuse to sell it off to private healthcare firms.

As for the wider reshuffle, it looks like all the sacked women are being replaced by men....


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## purves grundy (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> Justine Greening


Hmmm... probably a good opportunity to ditch the 0.7 commitment


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

kebabking said:


> firstly you can argue about the numbers - has Lansley gone from health to LoC because he'll be a great LoC, or because he's a catastrophe at Health (and probably everything else), and LoC is the place he'll do least damage whilst not causing Cameron a problem on the backbenches?
> 
> secondly, of the three women you've mentioned, two of them have been demonstratably crap at their jobs (i've no idea about Gillan) - should they be in government because they're women?


 
I don't know a lot but Spelman and Warsi demonstrably crap at their jobs, really?  They've both always struck me as fairly ok. When Hunt's been promoted, it's pretty clear that competence isn't exactly a pre-requisite.

Apparently Gillan has gone as she was prepared to resign over HS2, so saving embarassment.

I think it's just more generally the conservatives attitude to women.


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## Treacle Toes (Sep 4, 2012)




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## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

And the Minister for Justice is anti-gay.


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## Treacle Toes (Sep 4, 2012)

Tory double-speak in full effect.


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## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

Perfect example of tory fashion.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> The thief laws is now education minister. He would only have replaced teather if Clegg was supportive. Cleggs wrecking ball is on form this week.


 
Clegg has made clear since Laws' walk of shame that he'd have him back in an instant. Yet another out-of-the-closet Tory in Cabinet.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

Rutita1 said:


> Tory double-speak in full effect.


 
Singlespeak, more like!


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## Treacle Toes (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> Singlespeak, more like!


 
I'm referring to the distortion of reality.


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## kebabking (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> ...I think it's just more generally the conservatives attitude to women.


 
i think its decent, competent peoples attitude to politics - regardless of the party politics, few on either side look like the big beasts of the political jungle of the last century. can anyone see a Bevan, a Thatcher, or a Lloyd George in the Commons?

there's just a complete lack of talent in the Commons to choose from - Warsi was awful, woeful and _astonishingly_ unpopular within the party machine, as well as making the greatest mistake in politics - attempting to publicly box the PM into keeping you in place. Spellmans problem was that she was responsible for the governments first big u-turn, and that she had not been effective at keeping the Heathrow 3rd runway issue off the agenda. Cameron doesn't want it, and she failed to keep the issue sufficiently quiet.

the Prime Minister giveth, and the Prime Minister taketh away: blessed be the name of the Prime Minister.


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

kebabking said:


> decent, competent peoples attitude to politics


 
I really don't think it's that, unless I've misunderstood you.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

Rutita1 said:


> I'm referring to the distortion of reality.


 
So am I!


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## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

kebabking said:


> i think its decent, competent peoples attitude to politics - regardless of the party politics, few on either side look like the big beasts of the political jungle of the last century. can anyone see a Bevan, a Thatcher, or a Lloyd George in the Commons?
> 
> there's just a complete lack of talent in the Commons to choose from - Warsi was awful, woeful and _astonishingly_ unpopular within the party machine, as well as making the greatest mistake in politics - attempting to publicly box the PM into keeping you in place. Spellmans problem was that she was responsible for the governments first big u-turn, and that she had not been effective at keeping the Heathrow 3rd runway issue off the agenda. Cameron doesn't want it, and she failed to keep the issue sufficiently quiet.
> 
> the Prime Minister giveth, and the Prime Minister taketh away: blessed be the name of the Prime Minister.


Are you a conservative party member?


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## kebabking (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> I really don't think it's that, unless I've misunderstood you.


 
i mean in terms of becoming an MP, and i suppose what would be described as civic society.

people just don't seem to want to get involved - have their say, yes - but actually do much, or see government as more than a vehicle for single issue politics, not so much.


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## kebabking (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> Are you a conservative party member?


 
nope, never been a member of a political party - not even at uni...


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## bendeus (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> To where?
> I mean, I see Grayling as a mean Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster (the booby prize of Cabinet seats), but I wouldn't trust him with anything more complex than a small Hornby train set. Miller is just fucking incompetent, and Shittshas accomplished the sum of fuck all in terms of actual *housing*.


 
True story - I went to the launch of the Big Society in Coin Street in 2010  - it was with work, honest! All the toads were there in their pomp just prior to the election. It gave me the chance to study them close up. Some, like Gove and CallmeDave himself were slick and well-drilled, others simply oozed odiousness - Osborne for one, but Greyling saved the best of the day for his speech. He was, at the time, the shadow home secretary (I think), and gave a speech whose motif was 'broken Britain '. He was a dreadful speaker; stilted, stumbling and stiff. Anyways, he really wanted to hammer home the sheer, dweadful, bwokenness of Bwitain in order to provide the spine for his burblings. I can't to this day work out whether this was scripted or he went off piste, but he said, "...I have seen families driven out of their homes by thugs, I have seen old people frightened to go out after dark, *I have seen a guinea pig, stamped to death by yobbos!"*

My bold. I looked round to see if people were smirking, but if anyone else had clocked it they weren't letting on. What a line! Of all the things that exemplify broken Britain for Greyling, it was a squished guinea pig. It left me wondering why he just stood there and watched, mind. Could he not have intervened to save the hapless cavy, or was he _secretly enjoying it?_

The people demand an answer!


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## bendeus (Sep 4, 2012)

elbows said:


> Yes.
> 
> Oh god Hunt is heath secretary, let the fun commence


 
Cunt rewarded for his loyalty, then


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## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

kebabking said:


> i mean in terms of becoming an MP, and i suppose what would be described as civic society.
> 
> *people just don't seem to want to get involved* - have their say, yes - but actually do much, or see government as more than a vehicle for single issue politics, not so much.


 

in terms of becoming an MP, its not for us anymore(if it ever was). Even in the labour party, the old TU to politician route is pretty much dead. Unless you went to a 28k a year school you've got no chance


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

bendeus said:


> I have seen a guinea pig, stamped to death by yobbos!


 
I'm sure that's a quote from Shakespare.


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## the button (Sep 4, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> urgh, reading hunts bio. magdelene oxford etc. as per


I think you'll find that Magdelene is at Cambridge, dear boy.


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## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

bendeus said:


> True story - I went to the launch of the Big Society in Coin Street in 2010  - it was with work, honest! All the toads were there in their pomp just prior to the election. It gave me the chance to study them close up. Some, like Gove and CallmeDave himself were slick and well-drilled, others simply oozed odiousness - Osborne for one, but Greyling saved the best of the day for his speech. He was, at the time, the shadow home secretary (I think), and gave a speech whose motif was 'broken Britain '. He was a dreadful speaker; stilted, stumbling and stiff. Anyways, he really wanted to hammer home the sheer, dweadful, bwokenness of Bwitain in order to provide the spine for his burblings. I can't to this day work out whether this was scripted or he went off piste, but he said, "...I have seen families driven out of their homes by thugs, I have seen old people frightened to go out after dark, *I have seen a guinea pig, stamped to death by yobbos!"*
> 
> My bold. I looked round to see if people were smirking, but if anyone else had clocked it they weren't letting on. What a line! Of all the things that exemplify broken Britain for Greyling, it was a squished guinea pig. It left me wondering why he just stood there and watched, mind. Could he not have intervened to save the hapless cavy, or was he _secretly enjoying it?_
> 
> The people demand an answer!


Now that, ash is how you tell a story.


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## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> I'm sure that's a quote from Shakespare.


I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving
  hysterical naked,
dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry
  fix,
 i saw guinea pigs, stamped to death by yobbos!


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## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving
> hysterical naked,
> dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry
> fix,
> i saw guinea pigs, stamped to death by yobbos!


 
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near Tannhäuser Gate. I've seen guinea pigs stamped to death by yobbos.  All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

I'm still struggling with how they can appoint a non-lawyer to Justice.


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

I wandered lonely as a cloud
          That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
          When all at once I saw a crowd,
          A host, of golden daffodils;
          Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
          Fluttering and dancing in the breeze,
i saw guinea pigs, stamped to death by yobbos!


----------



## the button (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> I'm still struggling with how they can appoint a non-lawyer to Justice.


Yeah, they made damn sure the education secretary is a paedophile, after all.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

8115 said:


> I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near Tannhäuser Gate. I've seen guinea pigs stamped to death by yobbos. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.


 The falcon cannot hear the falconer, mere anarchy is loosed, the centre cannot hold, a gunui pig is stamped to death etc etc


----------



## agricola (Sep 4, 2012)

What a fantastically daft reshuffle that is.  Greening demoted for sticking to the Tories own election promise, Clarke sacked for actually knowing what his department does, Gillian sacked on the assumption that she would actually make a stand on an issue of principle, and Hunt - _Hunt_ - promoted for being heroically incompetent.


----------



## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

O Brave new world, that has such stamped guinea pigs in't.

Enough.


----------



## the button (Sep 4, 2012)

Of Man's first disobedience, and the fruit
Of that forbidden tree whose mortal taste
Brought death into the World, and a yobbo,
With boot upon guinea pig, till one greater Man
Restore us, and so on.


----------



## Plumdaff (Sep 4, 2012)

Magdalen College Oxford, Magdalene College Cambridge.

You can't get the oiks these days.

I'm assuming Hunt is at Health because he doesn't have any popularity to lose.

Edit - I wrote Cunt completely subconsciously - let's hope this happens on all his departmental paperwork.


----------



## the button (Sep 4, 2012)

The reshuffle in handy spreadsheet form -- old cabinet in the first tab; new one in the second.

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0AjI0Eo6IUSaHdE1xRDdwMlR2aUMzWERFdnJ3Ty1qRFE#gid=0


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

the button said:


> The reshuffle in handy spreadsheet form -- old cabinet in the first tab; new one in the second.
> 
> https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0AjI0Eo6IUSaHdE1xRDdwMlR2aUMzWERFdnJ3Ty1qRFE#gid=0


Did you do that?


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

lagtbd said:


> I'm assuming Hunt is at Health because he doesn't have any popularity to lose.


 
Which is worrying me. Are they planning something that's even worse before the GE and hunt is being put there to carry the bag on it?


----------



## the button (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Did you do that?


No, mine would have had better charts.


----------



## Random (Sep 4, 2012)

If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a guinea pig - forever


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> The falcon cannot hear the falconer, mere anarchy is loosed, the centre cannot hold, a gunui pig is stamped to death etc etc


 
Ah, so it's the guinea pig-stamper who's slouching toward Bethlehem, then?


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

what rough yobbo is this


----------



## agricola (Sep 4, 2012)

If I ever were to change my name on here, "ennui pig" would probably be what I ended up being.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> Which is worrying me. Are they planning something that's even worse before the GE and hunt is being put there to carry the bag on it?


Wouldn't surprise me. Didn't Hunt co-author a section on Damien Whatsisname's book rant about the NHS, 60 years of wasting money or summat?


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

...But I have promises to keep,
and pets to stamp before I sleep,
and pets to stamp before I sleep.


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Wouldn't surprise me. Didn't Hunt co-author a section on Damien Whatsisname's book rant about the NHS, 60 years of wasting money or summat?


Interesting, will check that up later.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Wouldn't surprise me. Didn't Hunt co-author a section on Damien Whatsisname's book rant about the NHS, 60 years of wasting money or summat?


 
Green.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> Interesting, will check that up later.


 
I'll try and find it, spotted it earlier on.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

Brixton hatter pg 3


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

Ta, and ta to BH.

Link.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> Green.


Hannan.

Found the info: http://eoin-clarke.blogspot.co.uk/

_Direct Democracy_ was the name of the book, where Hunt called for the NHS to be dismantled.


----------



## Treacle Toes (Sep 4, 2012)

From Twatter:



> not all-white cabinet because IDS is mixed-race


 
O RLY?


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> Brixton hatter pg 3


Oops, missed that.


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Hannan.
> 
> Found the info: http://eoin-clarke.blogspot.co.uk/
> 
> _Direct Democracy_ was the name of the book, where Hunt called for the NHS to be dismantled.


A thanks to you too.


----------



## belboid (Sep 4, 2012)

Rutita1 said:


> From Twatter:
> 
> 
> 
> O RLY?


great granny was Japanese


----------



## Random (Sep 4, 2012)

Every single member of the UK cabinet is descended from Africans. FACT


----------



## BigTom (Sep 4, 2012)

Rutita1 said:


> From Twatter:
> 
> 
> 
> O RLY?


 
Yeah, obviously.. half scottish (duncan), half english (smith). duh. 

any news on who is replacing Grayling and Miller at the DWP?


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

BigTom said:


> Yeah, obviously.. half scottish (duncan), half english (smith). duh.
> 
> any news on who is replacing Grayling and Miller at the DWP?


Mark Hoban replaces Grayling (I think). Don't know about Miller.


----------



## Treacle Toes (Sep 4, 2012)

belboid said:


> great granny was Japanese


 
Which makes his great grandmother Japanese, not IDS Mixed. What is this strange return to the ODR? One eighth ffs!


----------



## the button (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Mark Hoban replaces Grayling (I think). Don't know about Miller.


Mark Hoban, eh? A quick google reveals him to be a bit less of a pantomime villain than Chris Grayling. But at least his name has the same number of syllables, so we won't need to come up with any new chants.


----------



## nino_savatte (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Hannan.
> 
> Found the info: http://eoin-clarke.blogspot.co.uk/
> 
> _Direct Democracy_ was the name of the book, where Hunt called for the NHS to be dismantled.


 
I saw this on Twitter and tbh, I'm not surprised. The question is: where is this book?


----------



## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

That picture the BBC and Guardian are using says it all really.







Whats he doing, practicing for his next job as minister for jumping naked out of a giant cake at some very strange parties?


----------



## Greebo (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> I'm still struggling with how they can appoint a non-lawyer to Justice.


You can't have ministers being given jobs they understand, they might go native!


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Hannan.
> 
> Found the info: http://eoin-clarke.blogspot.co.uk/
> 
> _Direct Democracy_ was the name of the book, where Hunt called for the NHS to be dismantled.


 
Daniel, not Damian, then.


----------



## weltweit (Sep 4, 2012)

Greebo said:


> You can't have ministers being given jobs they understand, they might go native!


Indeed, as evidenced by Hunt going to Health.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

Rutita1 said:


> Which makes his great grandmother Japanese, not IDS Mixed. What is this strange return to the ODR? One eighth ffs!


The filthy Octroon! 
For some people that "one drop" is always going to be a drop too much, however much they try to pretend otherwise, the fuckwits.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

Greebo said:


> You can't have ministers being given jobs they understand, they might go native!


 
You're right, Sir Humphrey!


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

nino_savatte said:


> I saw this on Twitter and tbh, I'm not surprised. The question is: where is this book?


 
Available from The Daniel Hannan Press Inc, no doubt. He's the kind of deranged tosser who'd publish himself!


----------



## Greebo (Sep 4, 2012)

weltweit said:


> Indeed, as evidenced by Hunt going to Health.


FFS they're not supposed to take "Yes Minister" as a textbook for cabinet management.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> Daniel, not Damian, then.


 I should have made a note of it there and then.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

Greebo said:


> FFS they're not supposed to take "Yes Minister" as a textbook for cabinet management.


 
They've skipped straight to farce, bypassing tragedy!


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

nino_savatte said:


> I saw this on Twitter and tbh, I'm not surprised. The question is: where is this book?



Yep that's where I saw it.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

Lest we forget, Hannans the shitstickwho went around badmouthing the NHS and talking about death panels to our yankee cousins when the evil spectre of soshulised medicine was suggested so now theve got maobama care instead


----------



## Treacle Toes (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> The filthy Octroon!
> For some people that "one drop" is always going to be a drop too much, however much they try to pretend otherwise, the fuckwits.


They may, however,my annoyance is more that it is being used as evidence of the Tory Cabinet's ethnic diversity.  Which is all levels of insulting and disengenuos. But hey, given some of the bad comedy appointments in this reshuffle what's one more terrible non-joke.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

Greebo said:


> You can't have ministers being given jobs they understand, they might go native!


It's a first for this one, apparently. And there's all manner of legal reforms going on atm, which at least Clarke understood.


----------



## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> Available from The Daniel Hannan Press Inc, no doubt. He's the kind of deranged tosser who'd publish himself!


The 'book' is here: http://www.red-green.co.uk/web/plan.pdf


----------



## agricola (Sep 4, 2012)

cesare said:


> Hannan.
> 
> Found the info: http://eoin-clarke.blogspot.co.uk/
> 
> _Direct Democracy_ was the name of the book, where Hunt called for the NHS to be dismantled.


 
It was the fact that he said the NHS "_was no longer relevant_" that was the real highlight.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

agricola said:


> It was the fact that he said the NHS "_was no longer relevant_" that was the real highlight.


I suppose so.


----------



## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

My first quote from it.

Page 99.



> If there were some price mechanism in healthcare, people might make more effort to avoid developing conditions that require expensive cures.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

like presumably, cancer and old age


----------



## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

> If there were some price mechanism in healthcare, people might make more effort to avoid developing conditions that require expensive cures.


 
Yes, because having an acute or chronic condition is fine, as long as it's free.


----------



## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

Oh god, its wanking on about Singapore by the end of page 100. Murdoch likes Singapores way of doing things.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

Rutita1 said:


> They may, however,my annoyance is more that it is being used as evidence of the Tory Cabinet's ethnic diversity.  Which is all levels of insulting and disengenuos.


 
Anyone who accepts it as "ethnic diversity" is either blind or a moron, especially given that elements of the Tory party were actually putting the boot into Smith during his leadership for having a Japanese forebear (just like some put the boot into Portillo for being the son of a Spaniard).



> But hey, given some of the bad comedy appointments in this reshuffle what's one more terrible non-joke.


Unfortunately, probably not a straw to break the camel's back.


----------



## agricola (Sep 4, 2012)

elbows said:


> Oh god, its wanking on about Singapore by the end of page 100. Murdoch likes Singapores way of doing things.


 
TBF expressing admiration for something that Singapore does is almost at the level of a meme in books from the Tory right nowadays, whether its the death penalty, healthcare, their economy, or their habit of leaving the doors unlocked.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> Which is worrying me. Are they planning something that's even worse before the GE and hunt is being put there to carry the bag on it?


 
Wouldn't bet against it.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 4, 2012)

The only reshuffle needed is their heads!


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 4, 2012)

Random said:


> Every single member of the UK cabinet is descended from Africans. FACT


 
In the case of Eric Pickles, the ancestor in question was an African elephant.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 4, 2012)

Elephants have far more fucking intelligence, & ain't greedy animals.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Sep 4, 2012)

Mr.Bishie said:


> Elephants have far more fucking intelligence, & ain't greedy animals.


 
And they never forget. Unlike Pickles, who forgets not to be a useless cunt first thing every morning.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 4, 2012)

Hoist the cunt up with meat hooks from his nostrils, & leave him for the pigs.


----------



## cesare (Sep 4, 2012)

No-one seems to have mention the sock puppeteering, dodgy software Grant Shapps being promoted to Party Chairman.

http://www.bloggerheads.com/archives/2007/07/grant_shapps/


----------



## elbows (Sep 4, 2012)

I mentioned it on the thread dedicated to his esteemed business.

Meanwhile I an delighted to have found evidence of the Grayling Guinea Pig speech.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ele...for-return-to-traditional-style-policing.html




> “There are horrendous issues around anti social behaviour. I have a photo on my computer of a guinea pig that had just been stamped to death by some yob.
> “We are going to look to do 'in yer face' policing to deal with anti-social behaviour. I met two police sergeants recently who said they had not arrested anyone for six months.


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

Excellent, that means he thinks it a winning part of his speech and so rolls it out time after time.


----------



## 8115 (Sep 4, 2012)

Fuck Shakespeare, someone's been reading Waiting for Godot.


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

> . I have a photo on my computer of a guinea pig


I wonder, do we have a recording/account of him saying that he had witnessed it.


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 4, 2012)

When can we stamp on Grayling's head?


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

if two sergeants haven't nicked anyone in six months then they are clearly not trying hard enough-sack them

I wonder what other gore porn grayling has on his hard drive- praps a picture of the cat that lib dem beat to death. Broken britain


----------



## Plumdaff (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> Which is worrying me. Are they planning something that's even worse before the GE and hunt is being put there to carry the bag on it?


 
He's going to preside over GP consortia going bankrupt and being 'saved' by being bought out by private companies.  Plus the inevitable disasters as people start to notice their local services deterioate through lack of money, privatisation or most probably both. They are utterly aware that this is going to happen and how unpopular it will be, but the aim is to get to the point of no return, no?


----------



## Mr.Bishie (Sep 4, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> if two sergeants haven't nicked anyone in six months then they are clearly not trying hard enough-sack them


 
They obviously ain't in the MET, GMP or Sussex.


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

lagtbd said:


> He's going to preside over GP consortia going bankrupt and being 'saved' by being bought out by private companies. Plus the inevitable disasters as people start to notice their local services deterioate through lack of money, privatisation or most probably both. They are utterly aware that this is going to happen and how unpopular it will be, but the aim is to get to the point of no return, no?


I think it is, and to reach that point as soon as possible. I think this move is a pretty clear indication of that.


----------



## littlebabyjesus (Sep 4, 2012)

I wondered how long Clarke would last. He's a horrible tory cunt who mangled education and the nhs in his time, but he was genuine in his desire for prison reform and reducing the number of people sent to prison. Don't know whether he actually achieved much, though. A general lurch to the right on social policy seems to be in the pipeline.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> I think it is, and to reach that point as soon as possible. I think this move is a pretty clear indication of that.


 

so similar to the way other state assets were rendered 'unsavable'- outsource and sell of the profitable bits, underfund the rest and then point at them later when they are fucked and say 'not working, privatise the lot'


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

littlebabyjesus said:


> I wondered how long Clarke would last. He's a horrible tory cunt who mangled education and the nhs in his time, but he was genuine in his desire for prison reform and *reducing the number of people sent to prison*. Don't know whether he actually achieved much, though. A general lurch to the right on social policy seems to be in the pipeline.


 
Prison population went up under his stewardship.


----------



## littlebabyjesus (Sep 4, 2012)

butchersapron said:


> Prison population went up under his stewardship.


Indeed it did. Extraordinary that it's doubled since Thatcher left office. At least Clarke reversed the tendency of politicians to _boast_ about numbers going up, which Gordon Brown liked doing. But yes, he changed nothing really.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> if two sergeants haven't nicked anyone in six months then they are clearly not trying hard enough-sack them


 
Or perhaps they're custody sergeants. TBF, that probably didn't occur to him 



> I wonder what other gore porn grayling has on his hard drive- praps a picture of the cat that lib dem beat to death. Broken britain


 
Or that Lib-Dem beating his mum up.


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 4, 2012)

littlebabyjesus said:


> Indeed it did. Extraordinary that it's doubled since Thatcher left office. At least Clarke reversed the tendency of politicians to _boast_ about numbers going up, which Gordon Brown liked doing. But yes, he changed nothing really.


 
Been a feature since Howard, who was the first Home Sec to really stroke his cock about locking more people up. Remember "Prison Works"?


----------



## stavros (Sep 4, 2012)

SpookyFrank said:


> In the case of Eric Pickles, the ancestor in question was an African elephant.


 
Cameron was going to move Pickles, but then realised he was too late to book the crane and arcticulated lorry needed.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 4, 2012)

a reshuffle with pickles involved gives new meaning to the concept of a loaded deck


----------



## shagnasty (Sep 4, 2012)

Did the thief laws get back in and what position does he hold .there has no been much of it in the news if he has


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 4, 2012)

The thief david laws is now education minister. Really.


----------



## sleaterkinney (Sep 4, 2012)

19/29 attended Oxford or Cambridge. I wonder how many millionaires in there now?


----------



## weltweit (Sep 4, 2012)

sleaterkinney said:


> 19/29 attended Oxford or Cambridge. I wonder how many millionaires in there now?


Well I doubt Grant Shapps made a million from his software program.


----------



## treelover (Sep 4, 2012)

littlebabyjesus said:


> I wondered how long Clarke would last. He's a horrible tory cunt who mangled education and the nhs in his time, but he was genuine in his desire for prison reform and reducing the number of people sent to prison. Don't know whether he actually achieved much, though. A general lurch to the right on social policy seems to be in the pipeline.


 
Will this 'red meat' be popular with the electorate as it often is, the benefit cap is apparently the Condems 'most popular policy' though welfare changes overall are increasingly seen as negative, or is the economy, here in the Uk, always the prime determinant in voting, etc?..


----------



## frogwoman (Sep 4, 2012)

Hunt should be dismantled.


----------



## redsquirrel (Sep 5, 2012)

elbows said:


> I mentioned it on the thread dedicated to his esteemed business.
> 
> Meanwhile I an delighted to have found evidence of the Grayling Guinea Pig speech.
> 
> http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ele...for-return-to-traditional-style-policing.html


Well done. That's got to be made use of

As others have said Hunt in the NHS is the real worry for me.


----------



## treelover (Sep 5, 2012)

Esther McVey who has robustly defended workfare is made Disabilities Minister, you couldn't make it up

What do these people do all day?, their role is ostensibly to help disabled people, but the last one Maria Miller wouldn't even meet up with many groups..


----------



## shagnasty (Sep 5, 2012)

Someone on the indie comments said that hunt was promoted because call me dave is scared of him not being his sheild  interesting idea that


----------



## happie chappie (Sep 5, 2012)

elbows said:


> That picture the BBC and Guardian are using says it all really.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 
Lest we forget (depending on your employer, probably not work safe)


----------



## tufty79 (Sep 5, 2012)

treelover said:


> Esther McVey who has robustly defended workfare is made Disabilities Minister, you couldn't make it up


has this been confirmed? i'm only finding stuff that says she's "likely" to be given the role..


----------



## belboid (Sep 5, 2012)

tufty79 said:


> has this been confirmed? i'm only finding stuff that says she's "likely" to be given the role..


yup, confirmed this morning


----------



## butchersapron (Sep 5, 2012)

Confirmed as having a job within the DWP with clarification for what exactly she is responsible for coming this afternoon is what i read.


----------



## nino_savatte (Sep 5, 2012)

treelover said:


> Esther McVey who has robustly defended workfare is made Disabilities Minister, you couldn't make it up
> 
> What do these people do all day?, their role is ostensibly to help disabled people, but the last one Maria Miller wouldn't even meet up with many groups..


McVey... I remember her from Channel 5's _5's Company_ back in the 90s. I can remember her not liking my attacks on her beloved Tory party. Nick Knowles thought I was funny though.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 5, 2012)

Heh, Boris uses the reshuffle to shit-stir over the third runway at heathrow.


----------



## bendeus (Sep 5, 2012)

elbows said:


> I mentioned it on the thread dedicated to his esteemed business.
> 
> Meanwhile I an delighted to have found evidence of the Grayling Guinea Pig speech.
> 
> http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ele...for-return-to-traditional-style-policing.html


 
Kudos to you, Elbows. I always found myself wondering whether I had just imagined it, it seemed so eyeball-poppingly bizarre. I'm sticking to my story that in his speech Greyling had himself in the first person and attending the guinea pig squishing.

As BA mentions, it's clearly something he has seized upon as something that really 'speaks to people'


----------



## ViolentPanda (Sep 5, 2012)

nino_savatte said:


> McVey... I remember her from Channel 5's _5's Company_ back in the 90s. I can remember her not liking my attacks on her beloved Tory party. Nick Knowles thought I was funny though.


 
TBF though, an endorsement by Nick Knowles isn't really something to boast about!


----------



## SpineyNorman (Sep 5, 2012)

elbows said:


> I mentioned it on the thread dedicated to his esteemed business.
> 
> Meanwhile I an delighted to have found evidence of the Grayling Guinea Pig speech.
> 
> ...


 
Fucking pervert!


----------



## nino_savatte (Sep 5, 2012)

ViolentPanda said:


> TBF though, an endorsement by Nick Knowles isn't really something to boast about!


Tbf, the other 5 on the show have disappeared without trace. Amanda Cross? Paul Roseby? Rhodri Williams? Shauna Lowry? That show killed a few careers, including mine!


----------



## Brixton Hatter (Sep 6, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> Heh, Boris uses the reshuffle to shit-stir over the third runway at heathrow.


Yeah, although I reckon it's a fake argument designed to make both Boris and Dave look good. Boris can look like he's standing up for Londoners by railing against the third runway (even though it is not currently Tory policy, and he is unlikely to be London Mayor by the time any building starts anyway) and Call me Dave can keep the business lobby happy by pointing to the Review (which will inevitably say a third runway is needed.)


----------



## Poo Flakes (Sep 6, 2012)

Brixton Hatter said:


> Yeah, although I reckon it's a fake argument designed to make both Boris and Dave look good. Boris can look like he's standing up for Londoners by railing against the third runway (even though it is not currently Tory policy, and he is unlikely to be London Mayor by the time any building starts anyway) and Call me Dave can keep the business lobby happy by pointing to the Review (which will inevitably say a third runway is needed.)


 
The third runway will be built in a Tory constituency so hopefully 21,000 people will learn an important lesson.


----------



## Bernie Gunther (Sep 8, 2012)

Apparently Jeremy Hunt believes in Homeopathy ....

http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/t...unt-health-secretary-thinks-homeopathy-works/

What next? Viscount Monckton as Climate Change Minister?


----------



## redsquirrel (Sep 8, 2012)

Funny you should say that, Owen Paterson the new Environmental Secretary seems to be a climate change sceptic.


Sorry, should be ok now.


----------



## Hocus Eye. (Sep 8, 2012)

Invalid URL


----------



## weltweit (Sep 8, 2012)

Bernie Gunther said:


> Apparently Jeremy Hunt believes in Homeopathy ....


 
But Bernie homeopathy does sometimes work. It is called the placebo effect and can be quite effective.


----------



## cesare (Sep 8, 2012)

weltweit said:


> But Bernie homeopathy does sometimes work. It is called the placebo effect and can be quite effective.



The placebo effect doesn't require homeopathy e.g. a chalk pill looking like one containing medication, where the recipient of the chalk pill believes it is medication and experiences some benefit. No homeopathy involved.


----------



## weltweit (Sep 8, 2012)

cesare said:


> The placebo effect doesn't require homeopathy e.g. a chalk pill looking like one containing medication, where the recipient of the chalk pill believes it is medication and experiences some benefit. No homeopathy involved.


 
Quite right placebo does not require homeopathy. But homeopathy does require the placebo effect !!


----------



## cesare (Sep 8, 2012)

weltweit said:


> Quite right placebo does not require homeopathy. But homeopathy does require the placebo effect !!




I wish we could only have homeopathic doses of Hunt.


----------



## FiFi (Sep 8, 2012)

cesare said:


> I wish we could only have homeopathic doses of Hunt.


Any dilution of him would be too much for my liking!


----------



## cesare (Sep 8, 2012)

FiFi said:


> Any dilution of him would be too much for my liking!



You prefer the full strength version? Blimey.


----------



## DotCommunist (Sep 8, 2012)

so lets get this right, we've a believer in quackery and co-author of a book calling to dismantle the NHS IN charge of health. We've got the modern day equivalent of a shyster s co-chairman of the tory party. We've got a man who looks like he belongs on the register in charge of education. Anymore for any more? What capacity was LAws brought back under, minister for honesty?


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## FiFi (Sep 8, 2012)

cesare said:


> You prefer the full strength version? Blimey.


 
 I intended to say I don't want any of him, at any price. 

I'll try and make myself clearer next time!


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## cesare (Sep 8, 2012)

FiFi said:


> I intended to say I don't want any of him, at any price.
> 
> I'll try and make myself clearer next time!



I was deliberately mis-reading you


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## Libertad (Sep 8, 2012)

DotCommunist said:


> so lets get this right, we've a believer in quackery and co-author of a book calling to dismantle the NHS IN charge of health. We've got the modern day equivalent of a shyster s co-chairman of the tory party. We've got a man who looks like he belongs on the register in charge of education. Anymore for any more? What capacity was LAws brought back under, minister for honesty?


 
Let's not forget a proven liar as justice secretary.


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## ViolentPanda (Sep 9, 2012)

cesare said:


> You prefer the full strength version? Blimey.


 
The worst thing is, if Hunt believes in homeopathy, then if someone smacks him one with a wooden paddle, that'll "activate him", and he'll become even more of a cunt!


----------



## William of Walworth (Sep 9, 2012)

Already posted this link in the Tory Incompetence thread but Andrew Rawnsley's latest ten point attack job on the reshuffle, in today's Observer, is worth a once-over ...


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)




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## ska invita (Feb 13, 2020)

where oh where is the great recliner, master rees-mogg?


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

ska invita said:


> where oh where is the great recliner, master rees-mogg?











						Jacob Rees-Mogg avoids reshuffle questions
					

Mr Rees-Mogg will not be drawn on cabinet reshuffle speculation, preferring instead to discuss the weather.




					news.sky.com


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

So Johnson has ditched Loathsome & McVey.


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

and transport minister George Freeman gone, he of _Bastardbury_


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## ska invita (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> So Johnson has ditched Loathsome & McVey.


the last of the Tory centrists
(joke)


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

He's also ditched that Attorney General, Brian Blessed tribute act bloke.


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

So 3 Brexity women cabinet members/attendees gone (Loathsome, McVey & Villiers). Were they too Brexit bonkers or not enough?


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## TheHoodedClaw (Feb 13, 2020)

Julian Smith gone from NI. Seems odd to sack the only minister who has achieved something.


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Julian Smith gone from NI. Seems odd to sack the only minister who has achieved something.


As May's Chief Whip he was always going to be a risky & possibly too independent of thought prospect for Johnson. This is Johnson's moment of maximum patronage and he'll clearly favour yes-men over competence.


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> He's also ditched that Attorney General, Brian Blessed tribute act bloke.



always reminded me of the dad off friday night dinner


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## CNT36 (Feb 13, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> View attachment 198361
> always reminded me of the dad off friday night dinner
> View attachment 198362


Females.


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

CNT36 said:


> Females.


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## CNT36 (Feb 13, 2020)

I can imagine Cox asking colleagues "Any females?" in the way Martin does.


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

CNT36 said:


> I can imagine Cox going asking colleagues "Any females?" in the way Martin does.


soz, too early in the morning


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

the mail weighs in


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

twitter says Javid has resigned.

No idea if true yet...but...big if true


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> twitter says Javid has resigned.
> 
> No idea if true yet...but...big if true


twitter says a lot of things


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Think it is true...Cummings wins.


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## not a trot (Feb 13, 2020)

Has Larry the cat survived ?


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## ska invita (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Think it is true...Cummings wins.


Kuenssberg "Hear that Javid was offerered to stay on as Chancellor on condition he fired all of his advisers - he refused and turned down job "

Was reported Cummings was threatening to get rid of lots of SPADs last week ("I'll see half of you next week" or words to that effect), so it does suggest his involvement

ETA;


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Think it is true...Cummings wins.













						Javid resigns as Chancellor after bust-up with PM during reshuffle
					

Follow our live updates here Rishi Sunak has been appointed his replacement It comes after a number of ministers were axed in a reshuffle




					www.standard.co.uk


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## MrSki (Feb 13, 2020)

Resigned.


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

the wheels on the bus come off off off


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## Steel Icarus (Feb 13, 2020)

_Trustworthy with the economy_


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## MrSki (Feb 13, 2020)

not a trot said:


> Has Larry the cat survived ?


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Complete control


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## Lord Camomile (Feb 13, 2020)

Budget in four weeks


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> the wheels on the bus come off off off


Not so sure...looks more like Cummings has wrestled Javid's one hand off the steering wheel.
This is looking quite Stalinist.


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Sunak was head boy at Winchester before PPE (Oxon) & Stanford (Fulbright scholar) and unfortunately for his back-story neither parent has driven a bus professionally.


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## ska invita (Feb 13, 2020)

Lord Camomile said:


> Budget in four weeks


Not to worry: a super-talented-weirdo-unusual-mathematician-wild-card sent a draft budget in over email last week, which has triggered this move. The liberal-establishment-deported-criminals now in Kingston still won't get it of course.


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## gosub (Feb 13, 2020)




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## tommers (Feb 13, 2020)

nothing has changed.  Still cunts in charge.  Who gives a fuck which ones?


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

It's OK, Raab stays put.
Phew...


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

tommers said:


> nothing has changed.  Still cunts in charge.  Who gives a fuck which ones?











						Cabinet reshuffle thread
					

Esther McVey who has robustly defended workfare is made Disabilities Minister, you couldn't make it up   What do these people do all day?, their role is ostensibly to help disabled people, but the last one Maria Miller wouldn't even meet up with many groups..




					www.urban75.net


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Sunak was head boy at Winchester before PPE (Oxon) & Stanford (Fulbright scholar) and unfortunately for his back-story neither parent has driven a bus professionally.


did either of his parents ever drive one unprofessionally, or take one and drive it away?


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## gosub (Feb 13, 2020)

tommers said:


> nothing has changed.  Still cunts in charge.  Who gives a fuck which ones?



I'm just glad we were spared the chaos and confusion of Ed Milliband


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> did either of his parents ever drive one unprofessionally, or take one and drive it away?


You see, that I don't know.


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## Idris2002 (Feb 13, 2020)

Have we had this yet?



So, it looks like Johnson is putty in the hands of the freak. A new dawn of sober, sane, sensible, soaraway statesmanship awaits.


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## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Good dig at successor.


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## mx wcfc (Feb 13, 2020)

Cabinet reshuffle: Sajid Javid resigns as chancellor
					

Rishi Sunak takes over at the Treasury, as his predecessor says he had "no option but to resign".



					www.bbc.co.uk
				




wow


----------



## mx wcfc (Feb 13, 2020)

That is gob-smacking, 4 weeks before a Budget.  

Javid is a capable politician.

Sunak terrifies me.  

Cummings really is in charge now.


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## Artaxerxes (Feb 13, 2020)

Strong and stable


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## Steel Icarus (Feb 13, 2020)

_Strong and stable_


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## Steel Icarus (Feb 13, 2020)

Lol, snap


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## Artaxerxes (Feb 13, 2020)

S☼I said:


> _Strong and stable_



Ha, just got in there


----------



## Lord Camomile (Feb 13, 2020)

Isn't 'sharing resources' and 'flexible job descriptions' classic cost saving measures?

Will ministers be having their printing tracked now too?


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

One to cheer up a dull day...


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## Idris2002 (Feb 13, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> That is gob-smacking, 4 weeks before a Budget.
> 
> Javid is a capable politician.
> 
> ...


The woodwork squeaks. . . and out comes the freak.







Next week:


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## ska invita (Feb 13, 2020)

tommers said:


> nothing has changed.  Still cunts in charge.  Who gives a fuck which ones?


of course
The bit of interest for me is that this is a Tory party reinventing itself - not just this reshuffle, also the brexit purge, the transformation into UKIP, new purpose and vision. And the biggest bit of this today seems to be Cummings moving to fill No11 with his "unusual mathematicians"


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Deffo Head boy material...


----------



## marty21 (Feb 13, 2020)

Wasn't there something recently Carrie Symonds battling with Cummings about advisors,  is she team Boris & team Javid? It's all very confusing , thank the Lord we have a strong opposition to keep them all in check.....




Oh....


----------



## andysays (Feb 13, 2020)

Priti Patel remains as Home Secretary, so it's not all bad news...


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Affirmative action tory-stylee


----------



## gosub (Feb 13, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> Strong and stable



At least we swerved  chaos and confusion


----------



## Chilli.s (Feb 13, 2020)

andysays said:


> Priti Patel remains as Home Secretary


Sensible to keep the intellectual heavyweight.


----------



## Jeff Robinson (Feb 13, 2020)

Rightwing Nationalists get night of the long knived.


----------



## sleaterkinney (Feb 13, 2020)

Liz Truss is now the longest serving cabinet minister.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 13, 2020)

Fuck them. Past and present, fuck them all


----------



## likesfish (Feb 13, 2020)

andysays said:


> Priti Patel remains as Home Secretary, so it's not all bad news...



Tbf all home secretaries go insane pretty vacant started insane.


----------



## Nine Bob Note (Feb 13, 2020)

Well, it amused me


----------



## existentialist (Feb 13, 2020)

likesfish said:


> Tbf all home secretaries go insane pretty vacant started insane.


Doesn't the notion of "sanity" assume the existence of some kind of functioning mind, though? All Priti "vacant" Patel has is a kind of cesspool of kneejerks and hatred.


----------



## flypanam (Feb 13, 2020)

TheHoodedClaw said:


> Julian Smith gone from NI. Seems odd to sack the only minister who has achieved something.


Aye, got a bunch of self serving politicains to sign up to an agreement that had zero financial commitments in it.


----------



## Idris2002 (Feb 13, 2020)

likesfish said:


> Tbf all home secretaries go insane pretty vacant started insane.


Feck's sake fish, don't give her a cool punk name


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 13, 2020)

Idris2002 said:


> Feck's sake fish, don't give her a cool punk name




Quite. Priti Fucking Stupid works better.


----------



## killer b (Feb 13, 2020)

'Patel' works just fine.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 13, 2020)

Thrilled to see Liz hanging on

Those pork markets won’t run themselves


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## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

killer b said:


> 'Patel' works just fine.


or just p, which she is full of


----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 13, 2020)

killer b said:


> 'Patel' works just fine.




Priti Patel, tasteless nick-name given to Moronic Cunthead in the Home Office.


----------



## The39thStep (Feb 13, 2020)

There’s a theory that the Jarvid/Sunak issue is about loosening the purse strings to fund projects in the North. Apparently Manchester or at least the Mayor is pretty relaxed about Sunaks appointment .


----------



## Humberto (Feb 13, 2020)

Slightly strange that Javid found his position untenable so early. Looks like an attempt to concentrate power in number 10 and clear the decks from dissent. Not that I can see one party as any better than the other, but I will be interested to see what, if anything, Javid says about the whole controversy.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Feb 13, 2020)

mx wcfc said:


> That is gob-smacking, 4 weeks before a Budget.
> 
> Javid is a capable politician.
> 
> ...



He's not quite as in charge as he thinks he is, apparently. 

Honestly I thought with such a big majority it would take longer than this for the wheels to come off.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Feb 13, 2020)

existentialist said:


> Doesn't the notion of "sanity" assume the existence of some kind of functioning mind, though? All Priti "vacant" Patel has is a kind of cesspool of kneejerks and hatred.



You can be dim without being Priti Patel levels of evil.


----------



## SpookyFrank (Feb 13, 2020)

marty21 said:


> Wasn't there something recently Carrie Symonds battling with Cummings about advisors,  is she team Boris & team Javid? It's all very confusing , thank the Lord we have a strong opposition to keep them all in check.....
> 
> 
> 
> ...



This is almost exactly what happened in Zimbabwe before old Bob did a runner.


----------



## tim (Feb 13, 2020)

sleaterkinney said:


> Liz Truss is now the longest serving cabinet minister.




Eats, shits and doesn't leave.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 13, 2020)

The new attorney general sounds lovely.



> The terrorist incident last week reminds us that the rule of law remains a fundamental foundation of our democratic constitution, but the explosion of judicial review and judicial activism has led to a censoriousness and litigiousness in our society and has distorted questions that ought to remain exclusively political. How will my right honourable friend ensure that parliament remains the sovereign and legitimate source of law as we take back control?



Politics to trump Law.

Nice.


----------



## MrSki (Feb 13, 2020)

Priti (Keeping us all safe from counter terrorists) Patel.


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Nope, me neither.


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Grant 'Train in vain' Shapps going nowhere in transport...


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## likesfish (Feb 13, 2020)

Pratel works as well or treasonous bitch.
  consorting with a foreign military would be classed as treason if anyone remotely believed Patel wasn't a moron, "let's starve the Irish Patel" clearly gives her the defence that shes a bit ,er special


----------



## Lord Camomile (Feb 13, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> The new attorney general sounds lovely.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


"sovereign", "take back control". Uh-huh...


----------



## Idris2002 (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Grant 'Train in vain' Shapps going nowhere in transport...
> 
> View attachment 198388


Is that not the lad off Peep Show?


----------



## Pickman's model (Feb 13, 2020)

brogdale said:


> Grant 'Train in vain' Shapps going nowhere in transport...
> 
> View attachment 198388


Should he stay or should he go?


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> Should he stay or should he go?


I knew you'd see it!


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> Should he stay or should he go?


With complete control of his brief...why should he go?


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Beginning to think this fella might not be a pretty straight sort of a guy?


----------



## elbows (Feb 13, 2020)




----------



## Bahnhof Strasse (Feb 13, 2020)

Pickman's model said:


> Should he stay or should he go?





brogdale said:


> I knew you'd see it!



I have it first hand that Mick thinks his cousin is "A cunt."


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Bahnhof Strasse said:


> I have it first hand that Mick thinks his cousin is "A cunt."


You'd really hope so.


----------



## brogdale (Feb 13, 2020)

Again...nope, not me either.

I presume he's known as St Michael to close colleagues?


----------



## Nine Bob Note (Feb 13, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> The new attorney general sounds lovely.






Nine Bob Note said:


> 2018/07/09:
> I've lost all faith in Alex Chalk, so I'm throwing my weight behind Suella Braverman



I'm calling it. Future PM right there


----------



## SpookyFrank (Feb 14, 2020)

Idris2002 said:


> Is that not the lad off Peep Show?



You're thinking of Michael Green.


----------



## quiet guy (Feb 14, 2020)

It's nice to know that the government are so on the ball that they have an upto date list of cabinet members on the gov.uk and parliament.uk websites as of 6am today. Still showing all the previous name holders.


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 14, 2020)

Congrats to the new chancellor. Just goes to show that hard work, application and extreme privilege pays off .


----------



## not-bono-ever (Feb 14, 2020)

It’s hard to choose my favourite cabinet member now - such a fantastic choice of utterly wonderful human beings


----------



## SpookyFrank (Feb 14, 2020)

quiet guy said:


> It's nice to know that the government are so on the ball that they have an upto date list of cabinet members on the gov.uk and parliament.uk websites as of 6am today. Still showing all the previous name holders.



Turns out you can't upload data directly from the back of a fag packet.


----------



## Artaxerxes (Feb 14, 2020)

Anne-Marie Trevelyan is now Secretary of State for International Development 

Sound familiar?









						Sir Charles Trevelyan, 1st Baronet - Wikipedia
					






					en.m.wikipedia.org


----------



## kebabking (Feb 14, 2020)

Artaxerxes said:


> Anne-Marie Trevelyan is now Secretary of State for International Development
> 
> Sound familiar?
> 
> ...



The only really _interesting _thing about the reshuffle isn't the people, it's the department's - DFID and FCO have (to a large extent) been welded back together by sharing a number of ministers.

There are arguments for and against, but it's a lot more interesting in policy terms than no marks that even their spouses have never heard of...


----------



## tommers (Feb 14, 2020)

not-bono-ever said:


> It’s hard to choose my favourite cabinet member now - such a fantastic choice of utterly wonderful human beings



who was your favourite before?


----------



## barlimo (Feb 14, 2020)

Goodbye  Man in the Moon hello Spock!


----------



## brogdale (Feb 14, 2020)

Cabinet gender 'balance:
73% M : 27% F for full cabinet.


----------

