# The loneliness of a long-distance poster...



## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

OK, not far to go now. Almost reached the big 1000 post mark over a four year (ish) period. Have I got in me? Will I ever get there? Am I the equivalent of that bloke who finished the London marathon 4 days late?
I need encouragement. I want to post my 1000th on this thread.


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Come on its easy!


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Gratuitous post #2


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

I can post all day


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> Come on its easy!


Don't rub it in Charlie big potatoes!


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

that bloody 30 second rule slows me down tho'


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## Donna Ferentes (May 10, 2006)

Bin it!


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> I can post all day


We don't all have your superhuman stamina...


[stops for a fag]


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Donna Ferentes said:
			
		

> Bin it!



Oi! Taffs only in this forum Donna!


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## Donna Ferentes (May 10, 2006)

I know at least a dozen words of Welsh. And I used to have a girlfriend in Pontypridd.


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Donna Ferentes said:
			
		

> Bin it!


Harsh but fair.














Last in?


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> We don't all have your superhuman stamina...
> 
> 
> [stops for a fag]



Bah, your not even trying


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Donna Ferentes said:
			
		

> I know at least a dozen words of Welsh. And I used to have a girlfrriend in Pontypridd.



Thats probably more than the majority of Welsh folks!


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Donna Ferentes said:
			
		

> I know at least a dozen words of Welsh. And I used to have a girlfrriend in Pontypridd.


That's more than I know, and I am from Pontypridd!


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

> And I used to have a girlfrriend in Pontypridd.



Did she have a 'tache?


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## Donna Ferentes (May 10, 2006)

You, sir, are no gentleman.


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Come on llantwit - you can do it. Don't develop RSI mind, take it slowly, one post at a time, one tab only open, etc


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> Did she have a 'tache?


Even Pontypriddites have a line Belushi, and yer almost stepping over it there...

Are you saying my grannie has a 'tache?!!!
















Actually, she does.


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Donna Ferentes said:
			
		

> You, sir, are no gentleman.



When did you last see her? I reckon you could be llantwits dad


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> When did you last see her? I reckon you could be llantwits dad


Oi! Belshi... Line. You. Crossed it.
Outside, now - I'll 'ave you round the back of Angharrad's on Taff Street.
(Ooops, that sounded rude. I wasn't inviting you for a knee-trembler!)


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Gratuitous post #9:
Note to self: do not get into fights. People are only trying to help.


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> Gratuitous post #9:
> Note to self: do not get into fights. People are only trying to help.



No, a good ruck is exactly what you need toget the old post count up!


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> Gratuitous post #9:
> Note to self: do not get into fights. People are only trying to help.




*throws mouldy welsh cake at llantwit and scarpers*


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> OK, not far to go now. Almost reached the big 1000 post mark over a four year (ish) period. Have I got in me? Will I ever get there? Am I the equivalent of that bloke who finished the London marathon 4 days late?
> I need encouragement. I want to post my 1000th on this thread.



Ah I always like a sad race to the next 1000 thread. Glad to be a part of it.


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Come on llantwit, this is your thread and Im doing most of the posting!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> Come on llantwit, this is your thread and Im doing most of the posting!



Yeah, I'm going to be on 5000 soon and where are you llantwit?


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

What a boring thread


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## Lava (May 10, 2006)

I'm nearly at 2k


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Well done, we just need llantwit to follow your example


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Lava said:
			
		

> I'm nearly at 2k



 So you are - are you going to start a 2k thread Lava?


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> So you are - are you going to start a 2k thread Lava?



I think he should


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Sorry, I was being Bolshy over on education and employment. 
Completely neglected my saddo grab-a-grand effort over here!


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> Sorry, I was being Bolshy over on education and employment.
> Completely neglected my saddo grab-a-grand effort over here!



Thats the spirit!


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> I think he should



So do I


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

[Wipes mouldy welsh-cake off face]

Who threw that! I'll have you!!! I'll 'ave yous all!!!!


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Did llantwit come back for a sec there


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Come on llantwit! you'll have your grand before tea time!


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

I reckon I'll come back to this after. I guess I realy do have to do some work now.


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> Come on llantwit! you'll have your grand before tea time!


OK - no work for me.
I 
can 
do 
it.


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

...grunt...


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## Lava (May 10, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> So you are - are you going to start a 2k thread Lava?


If I can think of something good. 
So probably not.


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> Did llantwit come back for a sec there


I can't be everywhere at once Derian!
And what's this multi-tabbing? Bloody hell - you got three brains or summat?


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Lava said:
			
		

> If I can think of something good.
> So probably not.



I promise to post even if it's dire


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

So near, and


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> I can't be everywhere at once Derian!
> And what's this multi-tabbing? Bloody hell - you got three brains or summat?



Girl innit


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> I promise to post even if it's dire


It's true - look around you.
She's too nice for her own good, is Derian.


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> OK - no work for me.
> I
> can
> do
> it.



Come on, I'm posting on two different boardss simultaneosly, you need to raise your game!


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> So near, and


yet...


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## Lava (May 10, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> I promise to post even if it's dire


*plots*


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> yet...


so far...


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> Come on, I'm posting on two different boardss simultaneosly, you need to raise your game!


You inveterate show-off!


















[Seethes with jealousy]


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> so far...




11 more to go - you can do it  


Come on everyone ..... PUSH


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Gas and air  


Gas and air


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Come on llantwit! the finish line is within sight!


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## zog (May 10, 2006)

come on. been here since 2002 and all you can muster is 1000 posts.

get a grip and move them fingers.


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

[inhales]
Hmmmm. That's nice. I feel... quite... light... headed....


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Feel the Burn llantwit!


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Don't miscalculate now - we don't want yer 1000th post wasted on education and employment


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

zog said:
			
		

> come on. been here since 2002 and all you can muster is 1000 posts.
> 
> get a grip and move them fingers.



Fuck me Zog - you can't say owt - you been here longer than me!




And anyway - I've actually done loads more than 1000 - it's just all of the post-culls and whatnot. My actual count is, like, way high - like 23,000 or some such number. 


Really. No, really.


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

[Remembers sadistic PE teacher at school]

Must.. break.. pain.. barrier.





Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> Don't miscalculate now - we don't want yer 1000th post wasted on education and employment


Quite right - even if it is in an argument with some union-bashing troll.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> [Remembers sadistic PE teacher at school]
> 
> Must.. break.. pain.. barrier.
> 
> ...


Seven to go


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

I can see the finish-line!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

six


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

five


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Gratuitous post #57
I'm getting bored of this, now.


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

four


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

That's why I'll never break the 10,000 mark.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

Don't give up now. 
I'm with you all the way. One last push.


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> Gratuitous post #57
> I'm getting bored of this, now.




Nooooooooooooo ......


I can't leave the thread till you've managed it !!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

Three!!!!


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> four


three?


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

22otwotwotwot22
twot2222otwotwo
222222222twotw2
222222twotw2222
2222wotwot22222
twotwotwotwotwo
twotwotwotwotwo


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> three?



TWO !!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> 22otwotwotwot22
> twot2222otwotwo
> 222222222twotw2
> 222222twotw2222
> ...


Hummm not really a work of art.


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Hummm not really a work of art.



I dunno. Quite eye catching etc


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Oooh! I've come over all queer...


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## ddraig (May 10, 2006)

dere mlan llantwit!


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## ddraig (May 10, 2006)

one more step!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> Oooh! I've come over all queer...


You've come over a little queer? Thats one finale.


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> Oooh! I've come over all queer...



DAMN


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

One giant leap for nobody one small post for a nobody.


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## ddraig (May 10, 2006)

it's just over here


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)




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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Thangyewverrymurch


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

Hurray


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

*GOAL!*
ONE OF US!
Sad losers unite


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

*GOAL!*
ONE OF US!
Sad losers unite


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## ddraig (May 10, 2006)




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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

Right, to celebrate, I'm off to my Yoga class. Might be messy. I had beans for lunch.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

Humm, bit of a let down now.


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

*wanders off*


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

What arse hole holds a 1000 party and then ditches everyone for yoga?


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

Hurrah!

((llantwit))


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> Hurrah!
> 
> ((llantwit))


Too late, everyones fucked off and it's only me and a half bottle of tescos scotch. 

Fancy a wee dram?


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## Belushi (May 10, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Too late, everyones fucked off and it's only me and a half bottle of tescos scotch.
> 
> Fancy a wee dram?



Mighty neighbourly of you, dont mind if I do.


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## Col_Buendia (May 10, 2006)

Fuck me, the minute I turn my back to go and do a bit of work, look what happens...

_<wipes tear from eye>_

That's the spirit, Llantwit, old butty. I remember seething with jealousy when you reached 100 before me, who'd thunk it that we'd still be sitting here, sadsack bastards, years later, arguing the same tosses?


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 10, 2006)

Col_Buendia said:
			
		

> Fuck me, the minute I turn my back to go and do a bit of work, look what happens...
> 
> _<wipes tear from eye>_
> 
> That's the spirit, Llantwit, old butty. I remember seething with jealousy when you reached 100 before me, who'd thunk it that we'd still be sitting here, sadsack bastards, years later, arguing the same tosses?



Sounds like you could use some of this too 

*passes the last of the tesco scotch and reaches for a half finished hoff*


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## Col_Buendia (May 10, 2006)

thash the shpirit, Llantwit, yerracredit to dese 'ere boards an no mishtake... _<sobs>_

*shwipes bottle from AS*


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## llantwit (May 10, 2006)

[looks around]

I don't think I wanna post here any more.


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## Derian (May 10, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> [looks around]
> 
> I don't think I wanna post here any more.



Start a 2000 post thread. I'm happy to contribute for the next four years


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 11, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> Start a 2000 post thread. I'm happy to contribute for the next four years


This thread is my new best friend.


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## llantwit (May 11, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> This thread is my new best friend.


It told ME that it didn't wanna be your friend.
So there.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 11, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> It told ME that it didn't wanna be your friend.
> So there.


That's a bit rude of it after all the fun we had yesterday.

The two faced little cunt.


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## llantwit (May 11, 2006)

Threads can be fickle. That's life. Learn to deal. It's with me now, ok?


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## welshtart (May 11, 2006)

well done llantwit mate 
your prize can def be a 2am bird waiting outside of the Cri with a bag of chips looking for any guy to shag!


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## Col_Buendia (May 11, 2006)

I am *so* tempted to say he's already got one, but Mrs Llantwit would make Buendia paste out of me 

(and she doesn't like chips )


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 11, 2006)

Daddy or Chips?


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## ddraig (May 11, 2006)

CHIPS!


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## llantwit (May 11, 2006)

Col_Buendia said:
			
		

> I am *so* tempted to say he's already got one, but Mrs Llantwit would make Buendia paste out of me
> 
> (and she doesn't like chips )



She's gonna get you for that one.













(once I show her this thread  )


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 11, 2006)

Is this party still rocking or what!


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

It's kind of dying, AS... But we can sort that out. 
I'll provide the beat, and you break out some moves, my man...

We love the Atomic cos he our nizzle
boom-da, da-boom-boom-da
When he starts movin, out come da skizzle
boom-da, da-boom-boom-da
He breaks like a God an' that's foshizzle
boom-da, da-boom-boom-da
For sure my freind he ain't no wizzle!


That's it we got it - can you feel it again? I can - this party's moving - this thread is the shiznit again! Wooooooooooh!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

Fuck me this party is over.


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## Belushi (May 12, 2006)

It needs reviving


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## Belushi (May 12, 2006)

.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

It was all that Atomic nizzle shit that killed it for me, I'm going to stand behind this door and wait until it gets back on track.

*stands behind door and wait until it gets back on track*


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

This Welsh forum used to be rocking
But with Waterloowelshy it is truly shocking
Llantwit started rapping after his 1000th post
But Atomic took the nick and said it was the most
awful party that he ever saw
fucked right off and stood behind the door!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

Where did you get that photo of me?


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

Aw Atomic Suplex - gissa a break... or at least another chance - what about some indigenois Newport patois instead:

We could all try a cider enema and then pass the buckfast, and have a community workshop? What about it? You my clart atomic?


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Where did you get that photo of me?


 It's on your myspace profile. You rock


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

I might actually pass on the cider enema.


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> I might actually pass on the cider enema.



I'll have it when you're done with it, then. We have to recycle *everything* in Adamsdown


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Fuck me this party is over.


Was I being to much of a krinicklezizzle?


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

Make it a vodka jelly enema and we might have something.


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

Col_Buendia said:
			
		

> I'll have it when you're done with it, then. We have to recycle *everything* in Adamsdown


No, you dirty bastard - I mean I might have to forgoe the pleasures of the whole cider enema experience, not pass it on to the next bloke. Euuugh. You fucken disgust me sometimes.


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Make it a vodka jelly enema and we might have something.


Now yer talking clart!


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## Belushi (May 12, 2006)

And they say all Wales Forum threads end in filth...


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

So is it a cider snowball or a vodka jelly snowball we're talking about here? I need to warn the neighbours, that's all


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

Cocktail?

Ooh, err.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

Belushi said:
			
		

> And they say all Wales Forum threads end in filth...



Cunty cock in the muff fudge dirty girl bum poo vadge wipe spurt mess on the sheets bum stain rim clean.


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

axe wound*













*The dirtiest of dutty dutty words. Dirty Hedgehogs sing the axe-wound song:
http://www.rathergood.com/hedgehogs/


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> axe wound*
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Rather good.com never lives up to its name.


cunt dribble


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Rather good.com never lives up to its name.
> 
> 
> cunt dribble



But I love the Hedgehogs and the sad monkeys. Miserable bugger.

Filched arse juice.


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## fractionMan (May 12, 2006)

spunk bubble


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

melty pussy


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Cunty cock in the muff fudge dirty girl bum poo vadge wipe spurt mess on the sheets bum stain rim clean.



Phwoarrrr!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

all your debase are belong to us


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

Col_Buendia said:
			
		

> Phwoarrrr!


You'll have to buy wet wipes for yer keyboard now, won't you?
And please put that throbbing red monster away.


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

what you say????


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> what you say????


skinkgh holubbij ngaht flippertyg.


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

llantwit said:
			
		

> And please put that throbbing red monster away.



How wierd, that's just what your wife/mother/sister/father/brother* said to me last night. 

(*delete as required)


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## fractionMan (May 12, 2006)

Col_Buendia said:
			
		

> How wierd, that's just what your wife/mother/sister/father/brother* said to me last night.
> 
> (*delete as required)


You forgot 'sheep'


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

you get about a bit.




lick my bumhole


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> *wanders off*




*wanders back*


 


*runs away*


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

fractionMan said:
			
		

> You forgot 'sheep'



You forgot I'm not 'Welsh'.


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> lick my bumhole



Post it the fuck up then, so we can have a lick at it!


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## ATOMIC SUPLEX (May 12, 2006)

Yeah I think I'm done with this thread too. 

Please join me later for the 5000 party.


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## llantwit (May 12, 2006)

ATOMIC SUPLEX said:
			
		

> Yeah I think I'm done with this thread too.
> 
> Please join me later for the 5000 party.



You name the time and place.


hairy cock cheese.


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

*6000th post party !!!111!!!!*

Cordially invited etc


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

*waits patiently ....*

.... and only occasionally glancing at watch


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

*Miserable b'stards etc ...*

    


*goes home*


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## Lava (May 12, 2006)

Happy 6000th post Derian!!11


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

Lava is teh greatest and I bet he's not from Wales    










*sniffs*


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

I couldn't give a tagline  



Bitter? Oh no ....


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## Strumpet (May 12, 2006)

Congrats Llantwit!! 

Congrats Derian!


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

You can't get round me like that. Pink smaller writing for a girl posted stategically under BIG BLUE WRITING for a boy.



*sulks*


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## Strumpet (May 12, 2006)

Blue for a boy n pink for a girl!!  
And.......his is ermm bigger *cough* because it's his thread mun!


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

*polishes shiny postcount and looks accusingly at strumpet with tears welling up*


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## Strumpet (May 12, 2006)

Oh eck...

*feels bad n awkward....shuffles feet and gives Derian some choc...and blushes....*


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## Derian (May 12, 2006)

Chocolate helps a bit even when I'm crying  


Got any more there Strumpet?


<snaffles through empty wrappers and gazes up at Strumpet winsomely>


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## Col_Buendia (May 12, 2006)

Awwww.... DERIAN!! Don't be going all soft on us now. There's still dry white wine in the cooler, and you're not even on your fifth glass yet 

6000 posts? In less than a year??? 

Where do you find the time to down all that plonk, that's what I want to know? 

congrats xx


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## Strumpet (May 12, 2006)

Derian said:
			
		

> Got any more there Strumpet?
> 
> <snaffles through empty wrappers and gazes up at Strumpet winsomely>



*stumbles in after 2 hours of searching and gives Derian a mint* 

All thats left....


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## llantwit (May 13, 2006)

Congrats D! Sorry I wasn't around to celebrate, like. 
[tidies up mint wrappers and empty wine bottles)


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## munkeeunit (May 13, 2006)

I would like to point out that llantwit is still currently held under Bristol / South West 'supervision' following being shot down in an unsuccessful bombing raid on the BSW forum, and while attempting to flee back over the bridge.

We have now provided him with an internet connection, have stopped force feeding him dangerous amounts of ice-cream, and are now providing him with quality mints and bottles of fine wine (hence the above post and apologies for absence) and are also now currently negotiating for his full release via unnamed intermediaries.

That is all.

Munkeeunit.


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## llantwit (May 13, 2006)

It's torture!! Don't believe him about the ice cream!!! They've tied electrodes 2 my naaaaaaaaaaaaaads!!! Help m.......

[chhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (static white noise sound as line goes dead)]


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