# West Ham 2011/12 - Just Like My Dreams....



## tommers (Jun 8, 2011)

Everybody else has got their new season threads up so maybe we should too.

Big Fat Sam.







Look at that luxuriant tache.

Glorious.

I'm excited already.


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## London_Calling (Jun 8, 2011)

Hoooooooof!


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## kained&able (Jun 8, 2011)

no no he plays for stoke.

dj campbell is apprently signing for us, i have it on good authority that his dog walker and milkman have been sacked and he is looking for a house in essex.

dave


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## Streathamite (Jun 8, 2011)

strike a light, guv, this relegation caper is completely Allan Border!


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## TruXta (Jun 8, 2011)

Streathamite said:


> strike a light, guv, this relegation caper is completely Allan Border!


 
Spot on. OTOH I hope you bounce back, I like Wham.


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## kained&able (Jun 8, 2011)

yeah that was great that was.

apart from the mash like everyone else thinks scott parker was captian. Amazing how many jour5nos got that wrong.

dave


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## Streathamite (Jun 8, 2011)

TruXta said:


> Spot on. OTOH I hope you bounce back, I like Wham.


If that was addressed to me, I'm a gooner, and what have Wham to do wi' price o' fish?


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## TruXta (Jun 8, 2011)

I hope West Ham bounce back. Spot on was about the incomprehensibility of cockney slang to non-locals like myself.


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## Termite Man (Jun 8, 2011)

Even though pre-season friendlies are meaningless I can't wait for you to lose to Wycombe


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## Streathamite (Jun 8, 2011)

TruXta said:


> I hope West Ham bounce back. Spot on was about the incomprehensibility of cockney slang to non-locals like myself.


ah right, sorry, got it now.
I must admit, I feel a tad guilty ripping the piss out of West Ham and their fans now. It really is like kicking an underfed puppy, or mocking the afflicted.


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## kained&able (Jun 8, 2011)

I enjoy doing both of those things so i wouldnt worry too much.

*wonders off to spurs thread*

dave


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## tommers (Jun 8, 2011)

Streathamite said:


> I must admit, I feel a tad guilty ripping the piss out of West Ham and their fans now. It really is like kicking an underfed puppy, or mocking the afflicted



Last team to beat you at Highbury.  First team to beat you at the Emirates.


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## Streathamite (Jun 9, 2011)

tommers said:


> Last team to beat you at Highbury.  First team to beat you at the Emirates.


christ, those straws you're clutching at are ancient and mouldy!


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## London_Calling (Jun 9, 2011)

Just a helpful hint:

http://www.urban75.net/vbulletin/threads/349667-The-Championship-Thread-2011-12


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## kained&able (Jun 9, 2011)

Just a helpful hint:

http://www.urban75.net/vbulletin/th...le-like-c*unt-Official-spurs-thread-2011-2012

dave


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## Casually Red (Jun 9, 2011)

Im glad we've opted for the respectability of this league after the degenerate antics of Terry and Giggs have laid bare the moral vaccuum that Permier league football truly is . Its like we have been the chosen ones allowed to escape Sodom and Gomorrah just before the plague .

Pity we've that fat fucker as a manager though .


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## Streathamite (Jun 9, 2011)

Casually Red said:


> Im glad we've opted for the respectability of this league after the degenerate antics of Terry and Giggs have laid bare the moral vaccuum that Permier league football truly is . Its like we have been the chosen ones allowed to escape Sodom and Gomorrah just before the plague .


you keep telling yourself that...


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## tommers (Jun 9, 2011)

Casually Red said:


> Im glad we've opted for the respectability of this league after the degenerate antics of Terry and Giggs have laid bare the moral vaccuum that Permier league football truly is . Its like we have been the chosen ones allowed to escape Sodom and Gomorrah just before the plague .
> 
> Pity we've that fat fucker as a manager though .



  Indeed.

The last few years have been shit anyway... let's see what happens next year.  It'll be nice to play in a league where there's a reasonably equal playing field.  At least we have a chance of winning something... it'll be brilliant to go into games actually thinking we might get something out of it, rather than having next to no chance in about half of them.  The PL is fucking depressing once you've been in it for a few years.  I'm looking forward to it.


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## bluestreak (Jun 9, 2011)

it's always better down here!


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## London_Calling (Jun 9, 2011)

LOL.

And if you're really, really lucky, you'll get relegated and have even more fun next season!


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## tommers (Jun 9, 2011)

oh, come on - you know that isn't the point.


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## bluestreak (Jun 10, 2011)

yep, local derbies against the orient


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## Streathamite (Jun 10, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> yep, local derbies against the orient


I do NOT want your lot on my bloody high street, thank you!


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## bluestreak (Jun 10, 2011)

you think you got the monopoly on leyton now eh?  was my high street until i moved to brixton.  what road are you on in leyton then?  (PM if you want to keep it confidential).  i used to live on ashville road just off grove green.  and of course, during the protests as a young man i used to pretend to live on claremont road


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## bluestreak (Jun 10, 2011)

mind you, if we went down, they'd probably be promoted


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## kained&able (Jun 10, 2011)

Streathamite said:


> I do NOT want your lot on my bloody high street, thank you!



two years time you get it every week according to the atlas of barry hearn.


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## kained&able (Jun 10, 2011)

Oh and hines has rejected the first offer of a nerw contract.

Cant say im fussed.

dave


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## hammerntongues (Jun 10, 2011)

http://jlmd.blogspot.com/2011/05/hard-route.html

Interesting read on BFS


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## hammerntongues (Jun 10, 2011)

kained&able said:


> Oh and hines has rejected the first offer of a nerw contract.
> 
> Cant say im fussed.
> 
> dave



Not in the slightest , seen him play several times this season and didnt once see anything worth keeping


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## kained&able (Jun 10, 2011)

fast, but injury prone and doesnt seem to be the greast natural finisher.

Chmapionship at best so if he doesn't want to stay fuck him. Much more bothered about sears and stinislas.

dave


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## London_Calling (Jun 10, 2011)

kained&able said:


> fast, but injury prone and doesnt seem to be the greast natural


That rings a bell . . . .


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## Streathamite (Jun 10, 2011)

kained&able said:


> two years time you get it every week according to the atlas of barry hearn.


yeah, but he's talking bollocks


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## tommers (Jun 10, 2011)

hammerntongues said:


> http://jlmd.blogspot.com/2011/05/hard-route.html
> 
> Interesting read on BFS


 
Thanks mate. That's good stuff. Likes talking about himself in the third person doesn't he!


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## hammerntongues (Jun 10, 2011)

Trying to convince myself before I renew my ST . If we had managed to stay up I would have argued til I was blue that we don`t want him but I am slowly warming to the idea .


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## tommers (Jun 10, 2011)

Something needs to change and he's able to do it.  Not sure it will be pretty though!

Rumours that we might have a new signing tonight BTW.


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## Placid Casual27 (Jun 10, 2011)

Nice trip down Green Street for Cardiff then yikes

Good to have seen Collison back and playing at the end of the season, is he def staying? 

Very highly rated by Wales fans, proper player


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## tommers (Jun 10, 2011)

Supposed to be.  He came out with a story at the end of the season saying he wanted to stay, and the club have said he is... but you never know.  

if he can get fit again then he'll be an important player next season.

he's had a rough couple of years.


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## Lo Siento. (Jun 10, 2011)

hammerntongues said:


> http://jlmd.blogspot.com/2011/05/hard-route.html
> 
> Interesting read on BFS


 
His assessment of Barry Knight's play-off semi performance in 2000 is still as bonkers as it was at the time. He sent his players out to kick the shit out of us, and was shocked when the ref started booking them.


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## kained&able (Jun 10, 2011)

i've got a really bad feeling sunderland will come in for him to replace henderson.

dave


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## London_Calling (Jun 10, 2011)

Placid Casual27 said:


> Nice trip down Green Street for Cardiff then yikes


 Yep, beware the wrath of 40-something tubby cab drivers living their Green St dream by shouting rude words across two lines of police.


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## tommers (Jun 14, 2011)

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20110614/hammers-snap-up-faye_2236884_2374155

We've signed Abdoulaye faye.

Yay.

I think.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 14, 2011)

So it begins. 

Trust me, he's shite. But guaranteed if he ever comes up against his former clubs he'll score. So unlikely then.


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## tommers (Jun 14, 2011)

Refused as fuck said:


> So it begins.
> 
> Trust me, he's shite. But guaranteed if he ever comes up against his former clubs he'll score. So unlikely then.




Glad to see he's not disappointing so far.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 14, 2011)

Your optimism is genuinely heartwarming.


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## tommers (Jun 14, 2011)

Refused as fuck said:


> Your optimism is genuinely heartwarming.



That's not optimism.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 14, 2011)

It is heartwarming though.


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## mattie (Jun 14, 2011)

I'm trying to visualise how he can be more ineffectual than Upson, and I'm struggling.


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## tommers (Jun 14, 2011)

mattie said:


> I'm trying to visualise how he can be more ineffectual than Upson, and I'm struggling.



This is true.  Maybe Faye will just lie down in the middle of the penalty area?


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## mattie (Jun 14, 2011)

tommers said:


> This is true.  Maybe Faye will just lie down in the middle of the penalty area?


 
...and Green'll trip over him.

It'll be like Anton never left.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 14, 2011)

tommers said:


> This is true.  Maybe Faye will just lie down in the middle of the penalty area?


 
He actually did this once.


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## mattie (Jun 14, 2011)

Refused as fuck said:


> He actually did this once.


 
Shearer's got very odd managerial methods.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 14, 2011)

Big Fat Sam, I'm afraid.


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## mattie (Jun 14, 2011)

Refused as fuck said:


> Big Fat Sam, I'm afraid.


 
Excellent.


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## kained&able (Jun 15, 2011)

Faye isn't entirely useless. Was decent for the 5/6 years he was at bolton and was bloody impressive when he played for stoke.
Can play centre back and defensive midfielder, tis just the sort of experienced player we are going to need.

Also he shares my birthday and is therefore at least slightly better then everyone else.

dave


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## kained&able (Jun 15, 2011)

ummm kevin nolan is having a medical with us.

How the hell have we (almost) managed this??

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/fo...tles-Kevin-Nolan-having-West-Ham-medical.html

dave


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## tommers (Jun 15, 2011)

He has the same agent as Allardyce.

He's been offered the captaincy.

That still doesn't really explain it but fucking brilliant signing if it happens.


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## kained&able (Jun 15, 2011)

lets see refused slag this one off then!!!!

dave


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## kained&able (Jun 15, 2011)

> West Ham United can confirm that the club hope to announce two new signings within the next 24 hours.
> Both prospective arrivals are proven Premier League players and will  add greatly to new manager Sam Allardyce's first-team squad ahead of the  2011/12 season.
> The Hammers have already brought in experienced Senegal centre-back  Abdoulaye Faye and expect to make at least seven signings this summer.  Everybody at the club is determined to gain promotion from the npower  Championship at the first attempt.
> You will hear about every new arrival first on the club's official website whufc.com and the official twitter feed *here*. Watch this space for updates.


from the official site.

so who is the 2nd??

dave


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## mattie (Jun 15, 2011)

Have we signed DJ Campbell?

That was in my 'firm to strong' rumour pile.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 15, 2011)

Gutted about Nolan, he's a fucking legend. Excellent player and obvious captain.


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## mattie (Jun 15, 2011)

He's also a glutton for punishment.


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## tommers (Jun 15, 2011)

The other one is ricardo Gardner. 

It's amazing how quickly we are becoming bolton.


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## mattie (Jun 15, 2011)

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 15, 2011)

I told you so.


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## mattie (Jun 15, 2011)

Ba's gone, as has Hitzlsperger - apparently BFS didn't think he was mobile enough.  Sod the skill, eh.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/jun/15/demba-ba-west-ham-everton


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## tommers (Jun 15, 2011)

Hardly a surprise is it? Ba went on strike to get a move here. He doesn't give a shit. I hope his knee falls off.

Hitz is more surprising but more cos that says Sam got rid of him rather than him deciding to go. Whatever, results the same I spose


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## kained&able (Jun 15, 2011)

No way hits was stayin. Rumour has it BA walked on a free which would b lame


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## lopsidedbunny (Jun 15, 2011)

not bought anyone not sold anyone...


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

lopsidedbunny said:


> not bought anyone not sold anyone...


 
Eh?


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## strung out (Jun 16, 2011)

andy carroll just came up with this gem on twitter



> Kevin Nolan is having a medical at West Ham. Presumably he's getting his head examined.


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

strung out said:


> andy carroll just came up with this gem on twitter


 
It doesn't make huge sense, does it?

(Nolan's move, I mean)


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

Well, 50k a week for 5 years.

I imagine they sold it on "we're building something great, you'll lead out the team at the OS in 3 year's time."  They'll have said that there'll only be 1 year in the championship and then we'll be back in the PL.  He knows pie breath and he'll be the main player here.  He knows that the team will be playing with his strengths in mind....

But mainly the 5 year contract, I would think.


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## London_Calling (Jun 16, 2011)

I presume Nolan follows Big Sam around when it's possibe.

After Dyer, it must be pretty obvious the fee isn't the main issue - it is the wages and length of contract.

Nolan is 29 next week.


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

tommers said:


> Well, 50k a week for 5 years.
> 
> I imagine they sold it on "we're building something great, you'll lead out the team at the OS in 3 year's time."  They'll have said that there'll only be 1 year in the championship and then we'll be back in the PL.  He knows pie breath and he'll be the main player here.  He knows that the team will be playing with his strengths in mind....
> 
> But mainly the 5 year contract, I would think.


 
So, when's the career-threatening injury due, do you reckon?


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## strung out (Jun 16, 2011)

aldershot at home in the first round of the cup for you lot! exciting not being in the premier league isn't it?!


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## London_Calling (Jun 16, 2011)

Do Aldershot tend to play their first team in this cup?


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

strung out said:


> aldershot at home in the first round of the cup for you lot! exciting not being in the premier league isn't it?!


 
Old Trafford can kiss my arse, the EBB here we come.

(I used to live in Aldershot.  It is well shit)


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## 1927 (Jun 16, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Do Aldershot tend to play their first team in this cup?


 
If they do we're fucked.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

mattie said:


> So, when's the career-threatening injury due, do you reckon?


august.


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## 1927 (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> august.


 
In preseason.


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

After about 25 mins.

Broken leg.

3 places.

Never walks again.


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

I'm having trouble keeping up.

Ba gone to Newcastle?
Specs released?
Fuller in?


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

Specs gone?  

Maybe BFS does understand passing football.

Actually, that's cruel, I liked Specs.


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

mattie said:


> Specs gone?
> 
> Maybe BFS does understand passing football.
> 
> Actually, that's cruel, I liked Specs.



Yeah, he's on that list they put out last night.

Look...

West Ham United: Anthony Edgar, Holmar Eyjolfsson, Daniel Gabbidon, Lars Jacobsen, Filip Modelski, Jonathan Spector, Adam Street, Matthew Upson.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

where you get that list from i dont see it on the official site.

suprised edgar hasnt made the grade.


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> where you get that list from i dont see it on the official site



It's on KUMB.  There's a list of all the PL players who have been released.


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/jun/16/list-players-released-premier-league-clubs

Here.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

hmmm spector is certainly out of contract at the end of the month but untill i see anything offical likes.

dave


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

If anyone's bored enough, which players from that list would do a job for us?  

And what entirely unrelated set of players might we be likely to actually sign?


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

Controversial I know, but I think Bowyer could fill in for Parker.  Gudjohnsen is a quality player, if mercenary.

Remind me, what's our full-back situation?


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

mattie said:


> Controversial I know, but I think Bowyer could fill in for Parker.  Gudjohnsen is a quality player, if mercenary.
> 
> Remind me, what's our full-back situation?



1.  You're mental.  He's old and his legs have stopped working.
2.  You're mental.  He's old.  His legs have stopped working.
3.  Um... Faubert?  Spence?  Illunga?  Not great.  Maybe Gardner soon?


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

cock-smoker should come back! oh and salifou cos his song amuses me.
Tamir cohen is suprising, i'd def take him.
Oh and take kevin phillips in a heart beat, be an amazing squad player to have.

I'm struggling to find left back in the list, which is annoying.

That list is bollocks though javier garrado signed for lazio this time last year and it def wasn't a loan or anything.
Mattie: 

1) you're mental, He's old and his legs have stopped working and he was shit last time he played for us.
2. You're mental. He's old. His legs have stopped working and he is mercenary scum who allowed himself to be talked into getting in a car by a twitchy old man  instead of signing for us. Fuck him(he used to be one of my favourite players  )
3) illunga is def leaving almost certainly faubert as well, we have ummm errr ummmm spence and ummm errrr....... I demand joe bennet off boro for lb.

dave


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

tommers said:


> 1.  You're mental.  He's old and his legs have stopped working.
> 2.  You're mental.  He's old.  His legs have stopped working.
> 3.  Um... Faubert?  Spence?  Illunga?  Not great.  Maybe Gardner soon?


 
1. Didn't we release Hitz for that reason?
2. Didn't we release Hitz for that reason?
3. Uh-oh.


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> cock-smoker should come back! oh and salifou cos his song amuses me.
> Tamir cohen is suprising, i'd def take him.
> Oh and take kevin phillips in a heart beat, be an amazing squad player to have.
> 
> ...


 
Bowyer played through injury all of that season.  Contrast that with others who didn't give a monkey's.

But, yes, we need fullbacks.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

oh so shit and injured, yeah that clearly means we should sign him again.

Lets grab don hutchinson again as well!!

dave


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> oh so shit and injured, yeah that clearly means we should sign him again.
> 
> Lets grab don hutchinson again as well!!
> 
> dave



As should be evident from his time at Brum last season - and didn't we get a good look at those fuckers - he isn't injured or immobile any more.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

meh, i dont want him.

Hold on that list of people released where the hell was dyers name? 

dave


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> meh, i dont want him.
> 
> Hold on that list of people released where the hell was dyers name?
> 
> dave



Oh God.


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> oh so shit and injured, yeah that clearly means we should sign him again.
> 
> Lets grab don hutchinson again as well!!
> 
> dave



You've got me wondering what bud's up to now.

Not wondering enough to actually google though.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

I googled and glad i did. he works for the facist/racist media station talksport, oh and al jazeera

dave


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

Strange combo.

We've signed Bowyer twice and he's been rubbish both times.  Surely not even we can do it three times?


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

tommers said:


> Strange combo.
> 
> We've signed Bowyer twice and he's been rubbish both times.  Surely not even we can do it three times?


 
He was poor once, injured once, still made an effort.

I think that might be important, given Parker was one of the few to show any balls whatsoever.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

but we almost have nolan, who is 5 years younger, 8 times better and 12 times less of a petulant annoying ballsack.

The bit that we need to sort in midfield is defesnive, otherwise it means kovac starts!!!!

dave


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## mattie (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> but we almost have nolan, who is 5 years younger, 8 times better and 12 times less of a petulant annoying ballsack.
> 
> The bit that we need to sort in midfield is defesnive, otherwise it means kovac starts!!!!
> 
> dave



Fair point.

I'd rather have Specs than Kovac.


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

Well, i think we can agree on that.

I'd probably even rather have Bowyer than Kovac.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

mind you faye might be a defensive midfielder again, you can never tell.

but that means we are v.short of centre backs still.

dave


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

hmm thinking about it is j loyd samuel a left back or right?

I think he is competent.

dave


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

Nolan is confirmed now btw.


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## kained&able (Jun 16, 2011)

amazing. so where is gardner/campbell/some random that we were promised huh huh.

dave


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 16, 2011)

strung out said:


> andy carroll just came up with this gem on twitter


 
THE Andy Carroll (who plays for Liverpool) isn't on twitter.


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## Threshers_Flail (Jun 16, 2011)

kained&able said:


> hmm thinking about it is j loyd samuel a left back or right?
> 
> I think he is competent.
> 
> dave



Was absolutely awful for Cardiff, stay well away.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 16, 2011)

tommers said:


> Nolan is confirmed now btw.


 


Rather it was West Ham than anyone else, tbf. And that's fucking twice in recent history you've pilfered our captain for a bargain.


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## tommers (Jun 16, 2011)

Refused as fuck said:


> Rather it was West Ham than anyone else, tbf. And that's fucking twice in recent history you've pilfered our captain for a bargain.



Let's hope he turns out to be as good.


Broken leg.  it is so nailed on.  I can fucking taste the disappointment already.


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## Refused as fuck (Jun 16, 2011)

Nah, he'll be brilliant. He scored 18 for us in the Championship and 12 last season in the Premier. Proven quality.


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## discokermit (Jun 16, 2011)

nolan is great. got the right attitude.


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## Ponyutd (Jun 17, 2011)

West Ham United 2011/12 fixtures (subject to change)

Sat 6 Aug - Cardiff City H
Sat 13 Aug - Doncaster Rovers A
Tue 16 Aug - Watford A
Sat 20 Aug - Leeds United H *My birthday*
Sat 27 Aug - Nottingham Forest A

Sat 10 Sep - Portsmouth H
Sat 17 Sep - Millwall A
Sat 24 Sep - Peterborough United H
Tue 27 Sep - Ipswich Town H

Sat 1 Oct - Crystal Palace A
Sat 15 Oct - Blackpool H
Tue 18 Oct - Southampton A
Sat 22 Oct - Brighton and Hove Albion A
Sat 29 Oct - Leicester City H

Tue 1 Nov - Bristol City H
Sat 5 Nov - Hull City A
Sat 19 Nov - Coventry City A
Sat 26 Nov - Derby County H
Tue 29 Nov - Middlesbrough A

Sat 3 Dec - Burnley H
Sat 10 Dec - Reading A
Sat 17 Dec - Barnsley H
Mon 26 Dec - Birmingham City A
Sat 31 Dec - Derby County A

Mon 2 Jan - Coventry City H
Sat 14 Jan - Portsmouth A
Sat 21 Jan - Nottingham Forest H
Tue 31 Jan - Ipswich Town A

Sat 4 Feb - Millwall H
Sat 11 Feb - Peterborough United A
Tue 14 Feb - Southampton H
Sat 18 Feb - Blackpool A
Sat 25 Feb - Crystal Palace H

Sat 3 Mar - Cardiff City A
Tue 6 Mar - Watford H
Sat 10 Mar - Doncaster Rovers H
Sat 17 Mar - Leeds United A
Tue 20 Mar - Middlesbrough H
Sat 24 Mar - Burnley A
Sat 31 Mar - Reading H

Sat 7 Apr - Barnsley A
Mon 9 Apr - Birmingham City H
Sat 14 Apr - Brighton and Hove Albion H
Tue 17 Apr - Bristol City A
Sat 21 Apr - Leicester City A
Sat 28 Apr - Hull City H


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## kained&able (Jun 17, 2011)

april looks a bit harsh!

ricardo gardner has turned us down. oh well.

dave


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## hammerntongues (Jun 17, 2011)

Not sure if this has done the rounds already but my neighbour ( a baggy ) told me he had just had a call from one of his mates to say he was really pissed off because he went on line to renew his season ticket and was told he would have to pay a 20 pct premium ( my cue to say he got it wrong it was a 20 pct discount ) , no it was going up 20pct because his ticket was in the upper tier and he was going to see more of the ball this season .....


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## kained&able (Jun 17, 2011)

my boss has just informed me we are trying to sign anthony gardner. Anyone seen him play in the last couple of years?

i starting a rumour about craig gardner just to complete the set.

dave


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## 1927 (Jun 17, 2011)

Threshers_Flail said:


> Was absolutely awful for Cardiff, stay well away.


 
H e wasn't that good! Cost us all 3 goals against middlesboro, useless isnt the word!


----------



## 1927 (Jun 17, 2011)

Ponyutd said:


> West Ham United 2011/12 fixtures (subject to change)


 
I think yiu should take that down, Ed could get in serious trouble for posting fixtures up!


----------



## kained&able (Jun 17, 2011)

for the benefit of london calling we have a glamorous preseason friendly against bishops stortford again this year, oh and real zaragoza but i suspect you will ignore that one.

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Jun 17, 2011)

mattie said:


> Ba's gone, as has Hitzlsperger - apparently BFS didn't think he was mobile enough.  Sod the skill, eh.
> 
> http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/jun/15/demba-ba-west-ham-everton


 

wtf.  but... but... hitz was actually good for us.


----------



## kained&able (Jun 18, 2011)

todays rumours have us in for chelsea young un jack cork. Been im0pressed with the little i have seen of him.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jun 18, 2011)

kained&able said:


> for the benefit of london calling we have a glamorous preseason friendly against bishops stortford again this year, oh and real zaragoza but i suspect you will ignore that one.
> 
> dave


I'm having trouble kicking you when you're already down. Don't worry though, I'll adjust.

Are you away again at Thurrock this year?


----------



## kained&able (Jun 18, 2011)

oh it was thurock not bishops wasn't it. of course.

the mighty wycombe! which umm works out for me really quite nicely, really.
dave


----------



## kained&able (Jun 20, 2011)

our match against cardiff will be shown live on the bbc!

which is nice.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Jun 20, 2011)

berrera have been earing rave review at the concaf cup.

Bloody contract feet, why couldn't have done anything last season.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Jun 20, 2011)

kained&able said:


> berrera have been earing rave review at the concaf cup.
> 
> Bloody contract feet, why couldn't have done anything last season.
> 
> dave



he was just lightweight , with no one in front of him he was fine but first sign of a tackle coming in he was jumping in the air !


----------



## tommers (Jun 20, 2011)

I think he might be alright this season.  Lots of foreign players take a year or so to get used to things, look at Tevez, Henry etc etc.

You never know.


----------



## tommers (Jun 20, 2011)

New home kit...







and away...


----------



## kained&able (Jun 20, 2011)

oh god i hate all those stupid blue kits, that one is better then one i own but it still looks shit. Home kit looks nice enough though.

as for barerra i presume he is off to malaga or somewhere else mid table and spanish.

dave


----------



## tommers (Jun 20, 2011)

I like it.   Pretty standard stuff, nothing too outrageous.


----------



## kained&able (Jun 20, 2011)

all the blue kits we have ever had look shit, i hate em. Black or white for away kits please, they tend to look decent.

dave


----------



## mattie (Jun 20, 2011)

tommers said:


> New home kit...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 
I can't see them.

Do they hark back to halycon days of Brooking, Bonds and Parkes, or are they more the Bukta period?


----------



## tommers (Jun 20, 2011)

They took em down, they weren't supposed to be on the site yet.

Try these...

http://twitpic.com/5eazi4

http://twitpic.com/5eaz6p


----------



## kained&able (Jun 21, 2011)

one of the papers has us in for joe lewis of peterborugh when rob green fucks off.

good keeper.

dave


----------



## mattie (Jun 21, 2011)

tommers said:


> They took em down, they weren't supposed to be on the site yet.
> 
> Try these...
> 
> ...




I quite like those, the home one especially.


----------



## tommers (Jun 21, 2011)

Da Costa has gone to Lokomotiv Moscow.

The cynical mind would say that he's running from something.


----------



## kained&able (Jun 21, 2011)

is he allowed out of the country then???

dave


----------



## tommers (Jun 21, 2011)

kained&able said:


> is he allowed out of the country then???
> 
> dave



It's confirmed on the OS so I guess so.  You would think he has to stay here but I suppose he's not difficult to find.


----------



## kained&able (Jun 21, 2011)

yeah but pennant wasnt exactly hard to find at brum and they still made him wear that tracker in his sock!

Daily fail have mentioned the court case and i can't find anywhere saying it has been dropped. Im slightly confused.

Rumor has us getting 1.3million for him, only had a year left on his contract.

dave


----------



## tommers (Jun 21, 2011)

kained&able said:


> yeah but pennant wasnt exactly hard to find at brum and they still made him wear that tracker in his sock!
> 
> dave




That is a very good point Dave.


----------



## kained&able (Jun 21, 2011)

hmm a quick bit of googleing suggests you are actually allowed to leave the country unless you are deemed a flight risk or likely to commit a crime while abroad(holigans and gary glitter then) in which case you have to give up your passport(or be remanded in jail) cant find anything about moving permanently.

Learn something every day.

dave


----------



## chieftain (Jun 22, 2011)

I'm reliably informed that the home shirt previously posted on this THREAD was a fake.

This is in fact the real one.


----------



## London_Calling (Jun 22, 2011)

kained&able said:


> one of the papers has us in for joe lewis
> 
> good keeper.
> 
> dave


Good businessman, not so sure of his willingness to perform for Wet Sham though - might suffer a touch of the Teddy Sherringham's..... Long way to commute,  as well.


----------



## bluestreak (Jun 23, 2011)

chieftain said:


> I'm reliably informed that the home shirt previously posted on this THREAD was a fake.
> 
> This is in fact the real one.
> 
> View attachment 15964


 
and again...






i'm going to enjoy this pic...


----------



## chieftain (Jun 23, 2011)

Thats a classy Cold Sore Big Sams sporting


----------



## bluestreak (Jun 24, 2011)

big fat sam's big fat herpes.


----------



## bluestreak (Jun 24, 2011)

-where'd you get that cold sore, sam?

-fucking your mum, lol.


----------



## chieftain (Jun 24, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> -where'd you get that cold sore, sam?
> 
> -fucking your mum, lol.


 
He might of caught from a toilet seat or Karen Brady


----------



## tommers (Jun 24, 2011)

Kovac has gone to basle.


----------



## mattie (Jun 25, 2011)

tommers said:


> Kovac has gone to basle.


 
Poor Basle.


----------



## Batboy (Jun 25, 2011)

Anyone on here up for sharing a season ticket next season? I'm going to get one, but won't be able to go  to a lot of the games and living in Highbury I'm surrounded by Gooners and bitter twisted Spurs fans.

pm me if interested.....


----------



## London_Calling (Jun 25, 2011)

Haven't you got a 20,000 waiting list, a huge waiting list that has prompted the owners to move to the Olympic Stadium?


----------



## mattie (Jun 25, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Haven't you got a 20,000 waiting list, a huge waiting list that has prompted the owners to move to the Olympic Stadium?


 
We're diversifying the brand.  Rob Green's getting into discus and we had earmarked Benni McCarty to do the shot-put.  

Business genius.


----------



## mattie (Jun 25, 2011)

Batboy said:


> Anyone on here up for sharing a season ticket next season? I'm going to get one, but won't be able to go  to a lot of the games and living in Highbury I'm surrounded by Gooners and bitter twisted Spurs fans.
> 
> pm me if interested.....



Out of interest, have the ST prices dropped now we're in the Championship?


----------



## mattie (Jun 25, 2011)

I'm sure this will make all the difference.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/othersports/olympics/8597558/Tottenham-Hotspur-and-Leyton-Orient-warned-against-appealing-Olympic-Stadium-decision.html

“Ultimately I have taken the view that the grounds advanced are more the product of legal ingenuity than of substance.”

Nice that Levy and Hearn are paying for the lawyers' new yachts.


----------



## London_Calling (Jun 25, 2011)

mattie said:


> We're diversifying the brand.  Rob Green's getting into discus and we had earmarked Benni McCarty to do the shot-put.
> 
> Business genius.


 ^ he funny man


----------



## tommers (Jun 25, 2011)

mattie said:


> Out of interest, have the ST prices dropped now we're in the Championship?



Yeah, 10%.


----------



## mattie (Jun 25, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> ^ he funny man



I'm serious.


----------



## mattie (Jun 25, 2011)

tommers said:


> Yeah, 10%.


 
That's not quite as much as I'd expected, for some reason.


----------



## tommers (Jun 25, 2011)

There are 4 more games too.


----------



## mattie (Jun 25, 2011)

tommers said:


> There are 4 more games too.


 
I keep forgetting that.

On that note, do season tickets cover play-offs?  My intuition says they don't.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jun 28, 2011)

mattie said:


> I keep forgetting that.
> 
> On that note, do season tickets cover play-offs?  My intuition says they don't.



no but obviously they guarantee a ticket ( probably the only advantage of having a ST this season )


----------



## hammerntongues (Jun 28, 2011)

£ 675 for a band 2 ticket for an adult , that not bad really .  £ 210 for a junior , its my last season before we have two adults . I think STs start at around £ 550 .


----------



## kained&able (Jun 28, 2011)

I reckon i will get a half season ticket for xmas. any idea how much that will cost for bmore upper?

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Jun 28, 2011)

last year the halves were £ 365 in East Side Upper where I am , BM be a little lower I guess , a lot will probably depend on how we are doing after the first few games , we were dire last season and they were desperate to get punters in at Christmas . We will get better gates at the top ( hopefully ) of the Championship than we did at the bottom of the Prem.


----------



## London_Calling (Jun 28, 2011)

Better gates but tragic  tv revenues. And a much later Saturday night.


----------



## tommers (Jun 28, 2011)

First game of the season is on telly LC.

BBC pay top doll.... oh, yeah.  Fair enough.


----------



## kained&able (Jun 28, 2011)

and will be harder to find on bloody streams.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Jun 29, 2011)

sammy lee has left liverpool what do you reckon the odds are that he ends up at ours?

I reckon its more then a lil likely.

dave


----------



## TruXta (Jun 29, 2011)

Wouldn't surprise me in the slightest.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jun 29, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Better gates but tragic  tv revenues. And a much later Saturday night.



When I start worrying about gate money or TV revenues  instead of if we win or not I will not go to football any more , who gives a fuck .


----------



## London_Calling (Jun 29, 2011)

Don't pick on me; the posters ^ were getting all excited about additional gate receipts from  the full houses you might get. I was just adding my usual sound analysis.


----------



## mattie (Jul 2, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Don't pick on me; the posters ^ were getting all excited about additional gate receipts from  the full houses you might get. I was just adding my usual sound analysis.


 
The posters ^ were getting all excited about ticket prices dropping.


----------



## mattie (Jul 2, 2011)

Jordan Spence has agreed a 3-year deal, so we'll have at least one full-back who isn't Illunga.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 2, 2011)

I'm sorry lads.... I just can stop myself - it just has me on the floor every time.....










The near end is about as far away as the far end should be! Brilliant!!


----------



## mattie (Jul 2, 2011)

A setting fit for Luis Boa Morte.

I'm quite looking forward to seeing the stadium in the flesh.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 4, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> I'm sorry lads.... I just can stop myself - it just has me on the floor every time.....
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 
i dunno why levy bothered hiring a private investigator, you'd have gone through the bins for free lad!  you lot want it, you want it soooo much.  and we've got it but don't really want it   where's fat sam when you need him?


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 5, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> you lot want it, you want it soooo much.


 
What is it we lot want "soooo much"?


----------



## tommers (Jul 5, 2011)

Transport Links.
Infrastructure.
No interfering public bodies and local authorities.
"A new stadium".

HTH.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 5, 2011)

If you're  his spokesperson, does he mean the Olympic Stadium (see photos above)?


----------



## kained&able (Jul 6, 2011)

im getting concerned that we havent sold the likes of parker, green & cole yet, they ned to get out the door sharpish so we can get players in.

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 7, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> If you're  his spokesperson, does he mean the Olympic Stadium (see photos above)?


 
find anything else of interest in david sullivan's bin?


----------



## Refused as fuck (Jul 7, 2011)

The word "obsessed" does spring to mind.


----------



## chieftain (Jul 7, 2011)

tommers said:


> Transport Links.
> Infrastructure.
> No interfering public bodies and local authorities.
> "A new stadium".



All of the above but not the Stratford site, I dont know hardly any Spurs supporters who want the running track/binocular stadium.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 7, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> find anything else of interest in david sullivan's bin?


 Non sequitur of the day 

Back on topic: what is it we "soooo much"?


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 8, 2011)

A life, sunshine.  Or possibly a new stadium that someone else got.  Or at least, the site.  Still, I'm sure Hammers brand opera glasses will help bring in a few more quid each season.

Moving on, unlike our North London bredren...

Konch and Coley from Liverpool to us for 7.5m.  The nostalgic in me hopes this happens, but knowing us we'll just get Konchesky and pay more than the 4m we got for him.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 8, 2011)

and the carlton to qpr rumours appear to be getting stronger.


----------



## TruXta (Jul 8, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> A life, sunshine.  Or possibly a new stadium that someone else got.  Or at least, the site.  Still, I'm sure Hammers brand opera glasses will help bring in a few more quid each season.
> 
> Moving on, unlike our North London bredren...
> 
> Konch and Coley from Liverpool to us for 7.5m.  The nostalgic in me hopes this happens, but knowing us we'll just get Konchesky and pay more than the 4m we got for him.


 
Do you think you could afford Cole's wages?


----------



## kained&able (Jul 8, 2011)

joe cole would play for us for free. FACT.

or y'know not in the slightest, one of the two


----------



## TruXta (Jul 8, 2011)

I think for the sake of his own reputation Cole should go somewhere he can play his best football unburdened by ridiculous expectations. If that's WH on next to nothing wages all the better. It's not like he's in dire need of cash one would think, and surely Hammer fans would love to have him back.

Problem is he probably still thinks he's too good for all that.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 8, 2011)

I think he probably thinks he's still too good for a mid-table Championship side. It's moot...


----------



## kained&able (Jul 8, 2011)

wow lc, did you come up with that snipe all by yourself? amazing.

do you want to go on about the satdium that spurs absolutely dont want as well?

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 8, 2011)

There you go again.... conflating the supporters with Levy. In particular,  Levy's legal obligation to do the best he can by the shareholders - granted he's taking that a little too far....

Most supporters really, really don't want Stratford.


----------



## Refused as fuck (Jul 8, 2011)

Definitely not a thorny issue.


----------



## chieftain (Jul 8, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> Moving on, unlike our North London bredren...


 
West Ham, moving on in the wrong direction...
.
.
.
.
.
downwards


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 8, 2011)

from the fiver: "The reality is that there are 11 first-team squad players who have left since the season ended ... 12 if you include Benni McCarthy" - chapeau, Big Sam, chapeau.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 8, 2011)

psychic spuds fans.  whatever next.


----------



## mattie (Jul 9, 2011)

CFC has gone to Stoke, if the Guardian are to be believed.

The big lummox.

KUMB are denying it, so usual clarity there.

In other news, we're kicking up stink about not being paid for Diamanti, and Mido's just been banged up for a bit of argy-bargy with some students.  A busy week.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 9, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> psychic spuds fans.  whatever next.


 Yogic flying. Levy can fit more in the ground that way.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 9, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Yogic flying. Levy can fit more in the ground that way.


 






very good :applause:  i knew we keep you around for a reason.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 9, 2011)

god i love that jpg.  it has so many uses.  well, one.  but never mind.


----------



## strung out (Jul 9, 2011)

apparently big sam lays into thatcher in today's Sun


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 9, 2011)

excellent.  i'm really starting to like him the more i get to know him.  

also, check out this lad http://www.kumb.com/story.php?id=125438

former thai boxer.  now that's a defensive enforcer.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 9, 2011)

here we are: thatcher killed football

http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/09072011/58/premier-league-allardyce-thatcher-killed-football.html

tbf, we were hardly much better before her were we?  we've hovered mid-top ten in the fifa rankings since forever.


----------



## strung out (Jul 9, 2011)

here are some excerpts...



> Sam Allardyce claims English football is suffering because children are not playing enough sport at school - and he blamed Margaret Thatcher for starting the rot.
> 
> West Ham's former Bolton and Blackburn manager believes the professional game has been "undermined" by decisions made during the Margaret Thatcher-led Conservative government.
> Allardyce said in The Sun: "Since Margaret Thatcher stopped teachers being paid extra money for coaching sports after school, all sporting activities have diminished on a competitive basis."
> ...


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 9, 2011)

goal.com has us in for andy johnson http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/2896...lham-boss-martin-jol-lines-up-robbie-keane-as

not sure i'm too pleased with that.  injury prone.  we don't need that.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 9, 2011)

carlton cole has left our swiss training camp anr rumours have him going to stoke by monday.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 10, 2011)

If he aims for Stoke he'll probably end up in Glasgow.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 12, 2011)

Unfair.  If he ends up in Glasgow he was probably aiming for Newcastle.


----------



## mattie (Jul 12, 2011)

Poor Carlton.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 12, 2011)

loads of rumours about us getting dj campbell at the minute.

i really wouldnt complain about that

dave


----------



## mattie (Jul 13, 2011)

Interesting.

There's talk of loaning Scottie P to Chelsea as injury cover for Essien, such that he'll come back next season if we get promoted.

Hmmm.  Not sure if that'd work exactly as planned, but kudos for trying different things to keep hold of him.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 13, 2011)

yes! season long loan to chelsea and they give us josh mcecren or jack cork or something.

genius!!

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 14, 2011)

I'm slightly surprised to not have seen anything about a very recently released player of yours who's found himself a Premiership club quite quickly:



> He added: "I've got something to prove after the couple of years I've had, but I feel good and I'm really looking forward to playing my part next season."
> 
> "He has a lot of experience and is desperate to play in the Premier League again. I like the hunger he's got and he wants to prove a point."










£27 million over 5 years, 34 starts, we shall not see his like again: (((Kieron)))


----------



## mattie (Jul 14, 2011)

Heh.  Injured players.

Woodgate to Stoke, eh?


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 14, 2011)

Do you want another shovel?


----------



## mattie (Jul 14, 2011)

Are you implying I've taken your shovel?


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 14, 2011)

kained&able said:


> carlton cole has left our swiss training camp anr rumours have him going to stoke by monday.
> 
> dave


 
he came on in the 77th min last night against F C Basel , looks like he is going to go to Stoke but clearly all not wrapped up yet .


----------



## kained&able (Jul 14, 2011)

deal broke down over personal terms apparently but he is having a meeting with pulis when we get back from switzerland.(today??)

Lc how is king doing after his latest operation?

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 14, 2011)

I better get a job lot of these shovels; I hope I get more than 34 for £27 million


----------



## mattie (Jul 14, 2011)

I hope Dyer's injuries provide you with a few more seasons' worth of fun.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 14, 2011)

tbf, it's a great shame,  a wasted career. But some deals you just have to smile at....


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 14, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> tbf, it's a great shame,  a wasted career. But some deals you just have to smile at....



whilst we still had Benny on the books Dyer did`nt get a second thought .


----------



## mattie (Jul 14, 2011)

hammerntongues said:


> whilst we still had Benny on the books Dyer did`nt get a second thought .


 
That really was a calamity from start to finish.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 14, 2011)

i approve of lc's giving us shovels, its polite considering the amount of shit that comes out his mouth.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 14, 2011)

Ooooh! I've been done by the Bard of High Wycombe.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 14, 2011)

you're barred!


----------



## kained&able (Jul 14, 2011)

apparently eidur gudjohnson is at ours for a medical.

Not sure how i feel about that really. On one hand he used to be one of my favourite players on the other he allowed himself to be kidnapped by spurs and is clearly well past his best.

dave


----------



## TruXta (Jul 14, 2011)

Still a good player, if he's not too expensive I'd say he could be a valuable squad member.


----------



## mattie (Jul 14, 2011)

kained&able said:


> apparently eidur gudjohnson is at ours for a medical.
> 
> Not sure how i feel about that really. On one hand he used to be one of my favourite players on the other he allowed himself to be kidnapped by spurs and is clearly well past his best.
> 
> dave


 
He's turned us down twice before, and is mates with lumpalard.   Outrageous behaviour.

He was quality back in the day though.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 14, 2011)

he is mates with totally fat wank lumplard?

what a prick.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 14, 2011)

Hopefully we only need him for one season , as long as we don`t sign him on some stupid deal I would have thought he would be perfect fit .


----------



## kained&able (Jul 14, 2011)

1 year apparently.


----------



## tommers (Jul 14, 2011)

He's signed. I'm with Dave. This smacks of keane or wright or any one of many others.


----------



## mattie (Jul 14, 2011)

Davor Suker, Benni BigMac, Raducioiu. 

When have these end-of-career signings actually worked?

He tops the list by being mates with Lumpalard.  And John Terry.  Who knows what nasty habits he's picked up.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 15, 2011)

teddy sheringham & stuart pearce


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 15, 2011)

Winterburn


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 15, 2011)

.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 15, 2011)

ah yes, good old nige.

dave


----------



## mattie (Jul 15, 2011)

I should have said I meant strikers.

Sheringham being a notable exception, ill-advised gambling practices notwithstanding.


----------



## chieftain (Jul 15, 2011)

kained&able said:


> apparently eidur gudjohnson is clearly well past his best.
> 
> dave



Hence the mutual interest from club and player...


----------



## kained&able (Jul 15, 2011)

carlton cole to stoke looks dead in the water.
Looks like scott parker might be going to chelsea either on loan for a year as cover for essien or for 9 million!!!

dave


----------



## tommers (Jul 15, 2011)

How many times has Cole turned them down now?  Three? Four? I lose count.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 15, 2011)

think this is fourth although not sure if a few of them were us turning them down rather then cole.

dave


----------



## Ponyutd (Jul 16, 2011)

It's all Greek to me. And to Eidur.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 16, 2011)

Eidur Gudjohnson is the best signing you'll make this window. Perfect to bring with 25 mins to go, whether it's 1-0 or 0-1. Worth the wages for the tactical intelligence alone. Bookmark this post and thank me for the insight later.


----------



## Ponyutd (Jul 16, 2011)

I should make myself clear. He's gone to AEK Athens.


----------



## ChrisFilter (Jul 16, 2011)

Yeah, shame for you lot. Would have been a good signing.


----------



## tommers (Jul 16, 2011)

Ha, he's done that 3 times now.  That's cheered me up on a fucking horrible day.


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 17, 2011)

Ponyutd said:


> I should make myself clear. He's gone to AEK Athens.


 Jesus. There was me saying something positive about Wet Sham and it turns out they can't keep him in the city he loves. Shambles.


----------



## mattie (Jul 17, 2011)

Our loss, I'm sure.


----------



## mattie (Jul 17, 2011)

tommers said:


> Ha, he's done that 3 times now.  That's cheered me up on a fucking horrible day.


 
I admire the cheek.  I wonder if he did the old go-to-shake-the-hand-but-slick-the-hair trick on Sullivan.  

I wonder if it's the length of deal or the wages that put him off.  Or BFS.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 17, 2011)

this makes me happy. fuck him.

dave


----------



## mattie (Jul 17, 2011)

kained&able said:


> this makes me happy. fuck him.
> 
> dave


 
To be honest, we should have said that after the second snub.  The spuds/Stoke/Fulham benchwarming paper-airplane-chucker seems to be a touch indecisive.


----------



## mattie (Jul 17, 2011)

Hmmm.  Apparently, the club have it that BFS pulled out before the vinega....before the contract was signed.



> According to a source at West Ham, Allardyce withdrew the contract offer after failing to be sufficiently convinced by the 32-year-old striker's desire to play for the club.



http://kumb.com/story.php?id=125486

eta:  A load of stuff on the kumb forum about his gambling problems.  I had no idea.


----------



## tommers (Jul 17, 2011)

Yeah, saw that. It's all a bit teenagers breaking up. I dumped him, no I dumped her first.  Who cares really? 

His legs are shot and he hasn't played well in 5 years.


----------



## ChrisFilter (Jul 17, 2011)

tommers said:


> His legs are shot and he hasn't played well in 5 years.


 
I'll be saying the same if we fail to land Yakubu and Maynard. Of course if they sign it'll be the best thing since sliced bread


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 17, 2011)

Did very well for Tottenham - 11 starts in five months. We only finished 4th that season though.


----------



## tommers (Jul 17, 2011)

Chris - I wasn't keen when I thought he was coming. It's only about ten posts back!

LC - remind me how often he played for stoke.

Fuck him. The gambling addicted, flighty, teasing, chubby, chelsea and tottenham playing, puffin eating cunt.  I hope he gets paid in fucking Drachmas.  I've had it with him.


----------



## mattie (Jul 18, 2011)

We're on the box 3 times in August.

Not all bad, this Championship.


----------



## ChrisFilter (Jul 18, 2011)

mattie said:


> We're on the box 3 times in August.
> 
> Not all bad, this Championship.


 
Yeah, it's better being a top Championship than a middling Prem side in terms of telly appearances. Seemed like Leicester were on all the time last season.


----------



## tommers (Jul 18, 2011)

2 of em are on Sky but that's more than last year... weird.

What do we have against full backs, by the way?


----------



## kained&able (Jul 19, 2011)

wingers?


----------



## mattie (Jul 19, 2011)

kained&able said:


> wingers?


----------



## kained&able (Jul 20, 2011)

according to @westhambuzztap mat taylor has left boltons US training camp and is expected to sign for us in the next couple of days. 

I  for one look foward to watching matty taylor shoot from the half way line, also it means we have one luton yoot teamer in the squad again following the departure of upson, so hurrah.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 20, 2011)

Some of your almost signing appear to be so bad Levy isn't even bothering to nick them off you at the last min. Truely the sign of a club in trouble..


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 20, 2011)

apart from an ageing bankrupt septic give me the run down on your signings so far , I seem to have missed something.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 22, 2011)

http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/tra...irst-spell-at-Saints-ended-article773994.html

gwan, gwan...


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 22, 2011)

http://www.kumb.com/story.php?id=125501

sounds positive.  nice to hear sears and reid are coming on treat, let alone montanio (sp?)


----------



## tommers (Jul 22, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/tra...irst-spell-at-Saints-ended-article773994.html
> 
> gwan, gwan...



flying winger?!?!?!?


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 23, 2011)

innit.  for 750k i'd carry him to sarfampton.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 23, 2011)

for 750k i'd shoot him and donate the money to mr gollivan.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 26, 2011)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/...ign=Feed:+theguardian/football/rss+(Football)

Where is all the money coming from......... , it must mean exit for Cole is sorted .


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 26, 2011)

You're £80,000 a week better just off with Dyer's contract expiring. That'll pay 4-5-6 wages. The other big earners are off as well aren't they (Upson, Parker, etc). Got the parachute money as well.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 26, 2011)

plus we were never as badly off as gollivan claimed.  they were pleasding poverty but wanted a period of cleaning out, bet yer.

West Ham have offered £5.5m, rising to £8m, for Shane Long but Reading want him to stay for the final year of his contract. (The Times)

interesting that, i'd happily see him at west ham.  especially if carlton leaves, because to be frank, i suspect cole might do well in the championship in an allardyce formation.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 26, 2011)

Shane long would be a good signing 8 million(with promotion and staying in the prem for at least a couple of years) seems silly though.

As for parker he will only be off if someone bids for him and alladyce has said last minute bids will need to be doubled and i can't see parker throwing his toys out the pram to force a move.

Upson, dyer and gabbidon are the only fairly high wages that have left thus far. But i would imagine nolan/taylor are on good money.

Bluestreak don't see why gollivan would lie(much), wont be long till those accounts are public.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Jul 26, 2011)

I know they were loans but Bridge and Keane were on 60k apiece weren`t they ? Ba and Hitz off the wage bill too .


----------



## kained&able (Jul 26, 2011)

Fair points, they werent around long enough for me to remember they existed.

(((ba)))

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 26, 2011)

he'd lie so as to npt get our expectations up and to help in the transfer market.

if he came and said, yeah, plenty of money we're good, we'd want him to buy good players and stop moaning about the high wages we're paying to people who are shit or not playing.  plus there's the "desperate to avoid relegation" premium, which might not get levied if people thought we were skint.  look at what we payed for mccarthy, quashie, davenport etc.  if he pretends we're skint he's got an excuse not to spend anything until he's cleared out the dead wood, then he can claim to be ploughing that money back.  it's good business sense innit.  he's probably a good poker player that one - no-one can look at that evil fizzog for long enough to work out if he's lying....


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 26, 2011)

imagine this face with the vinegar strokes.  then kill yourself.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 26, 2011)

property, pants, and planes.

what a man.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 26, 2011)

to be fair though he brought in ba, keane, bridge, gary o'neil  & benny mccarthy.

can't really complain that the board didn't try!

dave


----------



## chieftain (Jul 26, 2011)

kained&able said:


> to be fair though he brought in ba, keane, bridge, gary o'neil  & benny mccarthy.
> 
> can't really complain that the board didn't try!
> 
> dave



Benny McCarthy!! lol


----------



## kained&able (Jul 26, 2011)

good point he was the year before.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 26, 2011)

kained&able said:


> to be fair though he brought in ba, keane, bridge, gary o'neil  & benny mccarthy.
> 
> can't really complain that the board didn't try!
> 
> dave



that's just the point.  always complaining about not having any money but spending it cannily.  except on keane, but tbf who could have predicted he'd be shite.  and yeah, mccarthy was pre-gollivan.

the others were good signings really, even if they didn't perform, and at generally good prices too i reckon.  he's not one to piss money away that one.


----------



## tommers (Jul 26, 2011)

McCarthy was theirs. Just the year before.

I think they've certainly made the most of the debts.  Makes sense for them to be the saviours.  Which isn't to say we weren't totally broke. And still are.

They're not perfect but I think they were exactly what was required.  That global economic crisis has a lot to answer for.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 26, 2011)

was he?  then i take back some of the implied positivity.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 27, 2011)

Did people know our amazing 17 year old aussie prospect has ball cancer?

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20110727/update-on-dylan-tombides_2236884_2402735

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Jul 27, 2011)

It struck me Wet Sham have bid for the wrong stadium, what you need is the cycling arena or to drain the swimming pool and turf it.


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 27, 2011)

i read that today dave.   poor lad, it would be hard enough to cope with the idea of nut rot as an adult but as a wee kid... hope he gets through it and comes out the other side just fine.

in other news, freddy p to sunderland?  cut-price?  how much is he going for, and what do people think?  i reckon he's a good striker for the championship http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2019130/Frederic-Piquionne-chased-Sunderland.html


----------



## kained&able (Jul 27, 2011)

not too fussed either way. he is old and easily replaceable but decent enough and should score a lot in the championship.

shouldn't be cut price as we only paid 1million for him according to transfermrkt.co.uk

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Jul 28, 2011)

i met that London Calling fella last night.  Dear god lads, a shambles of a man and no mistak   Too much unhealthy exposure to North London I reckon.


----------



## mattie (Jul 28, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> i met that London Calling fella last night.  *Dear god lads, a shambles of a man and no mistak*   Too much unhealthy exposure to North London I reckon.


 
No wonder he likes posting on our thread.


----------



## mattie (Jul 29, 2011)

First game on Sunday week.

I'll be watching England slap the taffs at Twickenham on the Saturday.  I refuse to venture opinion as to whether that'll be repeated on the Sunday.


eta:  Ooh, check post-count.  What a waste of a life.


----------



## kained&able (Jul 29, 2011)

may your 10k be a special one.

Oh and we are going to stuff cardiff, blates.

dave


----------



## tommers (Jul 29, 2011)

Joey o'brien is going to be our new cult hero. I have decided.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 1, 2011)

rumour has it boa morte has done the noble thing and fucked off back to portugal.

i really hope this is true.

In meh news, mikel foirsell is allegedly on trial with us.

dave


----------



## maximilian ping (Aug 1, 2011)

Isn't it about time the Villa had Parker off you lot?


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 1, 2011)

probably yes.  we can't understand his continued presence either.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 1, 2011)

i can understand it, no one has put a bid in for him yet.

villa makes the most sense for my money. swear i started that rumour months ago.

dave


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 1, 2011)

Get Big Sam on the phone! Joey's available on a free!


----------



## tommers (Aug 1, 2011)

Would love him at west ham but he ain't dropping a division is he?


----------



## tommers (Aug 1, 2011)

Dave - bfs has said boa morte has left.

I feel a bit sad.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 1, 2011)

I see a Wet Sham XI are at Sutton tomorrow - not far from you is it, tommers?


----------



## kained&able (Aug 2, 2011)

wooooooo hoooooooooo! bye bye lbm

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 2, 2011)

All we seem to be missing now is a striker , JLS now signed so we have two left backs , not convinced about either but seems like back four now sorted in BS mind .


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 2, 2011)

Green ,

 O`Brien , Tomkins , Spence  Illunga

                  Noble

  Barerra    Parker    Nolan    Taylor

                  Piq

??????


----------



## kained&able (Aug 2, 2011)

refuse to believe we are holding onto parker but collison can slot into that midfield fairly easily.


Green im not sure about, doubt he want to be in the championship but can't see anyone coming in fro him now that west brom are sorted. But we have good enough back ups for the championship so i really doubt we would replace him. In fact i wish he would fuck off to give krutz and stech a chance.

We also have the likes of sears, nouble & stanislas that can come into the squad so its really not looking bad at all. Like you say could do with a striker still.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 2, 2011)

That was more my starting 11 for Sunday rather than by Christmas , I think both Sears and Collison will play a big role at the club this year but in Sears case at least probably from the bench . I think Parker will be off and Cole too but I think Green is likely to stay now. There seems to be an optimistic buzz around the place at the moment but that could all disappear by Sunday evening .


----------



## kained&able (Aug 2, 2011)

blair turgott is playing tonight against orient who looks shit hot.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 2, 2011)

I think Sears is going to be our top scorer this year.

There you go.  Bang!  I've put myself right out there with that one.

LC - I'm impressed with your knowledge of our friendlies!  It's the "development squad"... not sure I can be arsed tbh.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 2, 2011)

tommers its only a tenner and robert hall and marek stech are worth a look at for the future as are george "im not going to get nearly as many bookings as my dad" moncur , olly lee and Sebastian Lletget

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 2, 2011)

..


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 2, 2011)

tommers said:


> It's the "development squad"... not sure I can be arsed tbh.


 
Have you got another squad, then?


----------



## tommers (Aug 2, 2011)

kained&able said:


> tommers its only a tenner and robert hall and marek stech are worth a look at for the future as are george "im not going to get nearly as many bookings as my dad" moncur , olly lee and Sebastian Lletget
> 
> dave



Yeah.... but I'm not sure I can be arsed tbh.


----------



## tommers (Aug 2, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Have you got another squad, then?



badoom.... tish.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 2, 2011)

boom tish 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/fo...ts-about-transforming-West-Hams-fortunes.html

i don't like all this optimism stuff floating around.  i've been a west ham fan long enough to know that detached cynicism is the only emotion to employ when dealing with the club.


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 2, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Wet Sham XI



Ladies and Gentlemen, a grown man. In 2011.


----------



## tommers (Aug 2, 2011)

Refused as fuck said:


> Ladies and Gentlemen, a grown man. In 2011.



I have told him.  Numerous times.  What can you do?


----------



## mattie (Aug 2, 2011)

tommers said:


> I have told him.  Numerous times.  What can you do?


 
A few ideas suggest themselves.


----------



## mattie (Aug 2, 2011)

kained&able said:


> wooooooo hoooooooooo! bye bye lbm
> 
> dave


 
For reasons that escape me, I'm actually a little bit sad about this.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 3, 2011)

apparently spence is going on loan to brizzle city for a bit.

doesn't really make sense as we will be short of back up very quickly if an rb or cb gets injured.

also we drew against sutton 2-2 with a side that featured ollie and elliott lee(sons of rob), george moncur(son of jon) and steve potts son danny!


dave


----------



## kained&able (Aug 3, 2011)

spence thing no one cares about is official and for the entire season. We had better have a quick recall clause on that!

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 3, 2011)

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepag...yce-swoops-for-Liverpool-flop-David-Ngog.html

christ.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 3, 2011)

i read a rumour about that and refuse to acknowledge it, further.

dave


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 3, 2011)

Since it's a rumour it's obviously true. Don't forsake the rules, you cunt.


----------



## TruXta (Aug 3, 2011)

I reckon he could do a job for you. His wage demands, if true, at 45k/week seems way too much tho.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 3, 2011)

yes, our cleaners aren't on more than 12k a year, and that 's the only job i am happy with him doing at the boleyn.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 4, 2011)

Just because...







I don't know why... it's just the funniest thing EVAH! Even assuming the pitch is longer than that patch, why aren't the fans up in arms about this?


p.s. why did they bother with that 'roof' in the first place..... genius.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 4, 2011)

carlton cole is going to fulham now. which will be nice.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Aug 4, 2011)

looks like spurs have hired a private detective to hack our phones during the olympic bid!

http://theboleyninheritance.wordpress.com/2011/08/04/pur-at-it-again-2/

I demand justice!!

oh and in other legal news  that lady who used to work for the olympic commity and then worked for us and spurs complained about is entirely kosher.

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20110803/west-ham-united-statement_2236884_2408810

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 4, 2011)

Yep, I saw that. She's been cleared by Wet Sham's own 'internal inquiry'. Very flavour of the month.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 4, 2011)

i presume the inverted commas are because of that fact that we may have commissioned the investigation but it was done by external solicitors and we probably have a decent case to make against you for libel/slander.

Oh and if you dont like the procedure, sue us and lose.

dave


----------



## mattie (Aug 4, 2011)

There are shades of Murdoch in Levy.

The howling mad one.


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 4, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Wet Sham's


----------



## kained&able (Aug 5, 2011)

mikel forsell isn't signing with us after a trial. The words thank fuck for that spring to mind.

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 5, 2011)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/14408810.stm

who he?


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 5, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> I don't know why... it's just the funniest thing EVAH! Even assuming the pitch is longer than that patch, why aren't the fans up in arms about this?.


 
it's the shock of actually winning something, even if it's something we don't know if we actually want.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 5, 2011)

8 goals in french league = goal machine.


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 5, 2011)

kained&able said:


> 8 goals in french league = goal machine.



that`ll be 3 more than  CC in then


----------



## tommers (Aug 6, 2011)

Carew's signed then.


----------



## mattie (Aug 7, 2011)

tommers said:


> Carew's signed then.



Only slightly concerned when BFS signs 6'5" strikers.


----------



## Daniel (Aug 7, 2011)

Looking forward to the irons first game on the BBC!


----------



## Daniel (Aug 7, 2011)

Worth watching


----------



## mattie (Aug 7, 2011)

Excellent.  Some bright sparks in amongst some pretty turgid stuff, hilariously punctuated by Illunga's 'defence'.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 7, 2011)

it begins again.


----------



## mattie (Aug 7, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> it begins again.



All strangely familiar, ain't it.


----------



## Daniel (Aug 7, 2011)

Tbh, it wasn't a bad game , and WH probs didn't deserve to lose with such a late goal, but thats what you get for having "England Englands EX Number One" in goal.


----------



## mattie (Aug 7, 2011)

Daniel said:


> Tbh, it wasn't a bad game , and WH probs didn't deserve to lose with such a late goal, but thats what you get for having "England Englands EX Number One" in goal.



Right.  So the problem wasn't with the left-back waving them through on goal?


----------



## Daniel (Aug 7, 2011)

Thats where it started, but Green was where it ended.


----------



## mattie (Aug 7, 2011)

Daniel said:


> Thats where it started, but Green was where it ended.



I generally find that goalkeepers are involved in the latter stages of conceding a goal.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 7, 2011)

I thought it was a good tactic to keep Carlton Cole busy on a push bike for so long.


----------



## ChrisFilter (Aug 7, 2011)

Relegation zone 

I didn't get why you went down last year and I don't get why you lost today. You have a lot of very good players.. what's wrong with the team? Maybe Parker's golden boy status impacts team spirit, or something like that?


----------



## mattie (Aug 7, 2011)

ChrisFilter said:


> Relegation zone
> 
> I didn't get why you went down last year and I don't get why you lost today. You have a lot of very good players.. what's wrong with the team? Maybe Parker's golden boy status impacts team spirit, or something like that?



An uncanny ability to shoot ourselves in the foot is the biggest problem - I used to think we were simply unlucky, but it's more the case that we make mad decisions at critical times.

Still, onwards and upwards. I hope.


----------



## stavros (Aug 7, 2011)

It wasn't a great game to be frank. West Ham played a lovely ten minute period early in the first half, quick one-touch stuff, but other than that not a classic, except for the drama at the end of course.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 7, 2011)

Bring back Dr Death!!1!


----------



## manny-p (Aug 7, 2011)

Have to say your midfield is solid. If you can hold on to them, you will be heading back up.


----------



## tommers (Aug 7, 2011)

The only surprise about that was that the goal wasn't a header at the far post.

Same old, same old.  As my uncle said to me today (at clay pigeon shooting that got shut down by the police) "we could have Capello as manager and the Italian national football team for players and we would still be shit."

I thought we did alright, we created a few chances, was a bit unlucky, but I've lost count of the number of games I could say that about.  Gipsy curse or something.


----------



## mattie (Aug 7, 2011)

tommers said:


> The only surprise about that was that the goal wasn't a header at the far post.
> 
> Same old, same old. As my uncle said to me today (at clay pigeon shooting that got shut down by the police) "we could have Capello as manager and the Italian national football team for players and we would still be shit."
> 
> I thought we did alright, we created a few chances, was a bit unlucky, but I've lost count of the number of games I could say that about. Gipsy curse or something.





An interesting mental picture - tommers, hearing about West Ham giving it away in injury time, holding a loaded gun.

No wonder the bizzies were interested.

I pray no spuds fans were in the vicinity.


----------



## tommers (Aug 7, 2011)

Honestly mate I've had a shit day.  Went down to my dad's, watched the game.  Found out I had a flat tyre, so changed that and missed the first ten minutes of the 2nd half.  Watched the inevitable last minute goal.  Went to a massive field to shoot clay things.  Was greeted by a Millwall fan with 3 shotguns, laughing about it.  Fella who lives at the end of the field calls the police cos he's worried we're going to shoot his horse.  Police arrive, say it's fine and go away.  Half hour later call back and say they can hear the shot falling on their car.  Obviously a bit nervous about that, what with the stuff in Tottenham so they shut us down (po po shut us down).  Drive all the way home and find out I trod in shit, which I then had to clean off.

It's a hard life being a west ham fan sometimes.  Fuck knows what we've done to deserve all this.


----------



## manny-p (Aug 7, 2011)

tommers said:


> Honestly mate I've had a shit day. Went down to my dad's, watched the game. Found out I had a flat tyre, so changed that and missed the first ten minutes of the 2nd half. Watched the inevitable last minute goal. Went to a massive field to shoot clay things. Was greeted by a Millwall fan with 3 shotguns, laughing about it. Fella who lives at the end of the field calls the police cos he's worried we're going to shoot his horse. Police arrive, say it's fine and go away. Half hour later call back and say they can hear the shot falling on their car. Obviously a bit nervous about that, what with the stuff in Tottenham so they shut us down (po po shut us down). Drive all the way home and find out I trod in shit, which I then had to clean off.
> 
> It's a hard life being a west ham fan sometimes. Fuck knows what we've done to deserve all this.


gipsy curse.


----------



## tommers (Aug 7, 2011)

I'm going to piss on the corners of the boleyn.  That's either curses or foxes.

Can't hurt.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 7, 2011)

i'm pretty sure that was just unlucky tbh, but there you go.  barrera looked good to me, for the ten minutes he got.


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 7, 2011)

Nolan and Parker in the middle. A snail's pace between them. The only way this is going to work is if Nolan pushes forward, not Parker. As it is he was playing far too deep to have any impact on the game.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 8, 2011)

i dont disagree with that. But parker will be off so it becomes redundant.

sears looked shit. sooner we can get barearra or stanislas into the team the better.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Aug 8, 2011)

f365 said:
			
		

> Good to see Benni McCarthy took being released by West Ham, then being called 'fat' by Karren Brady, with good grace.
> 
> When asked for his reaction to Brady's comments, McCarthy said: "There is the devil with a set of tits."
> 
> Perhaps Benni. But unlike you, she's _supposed_ to have tits.


class


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 8, 2011)

From free-kicks and corners, always get it on to the big man (if you have one) who is looking for Nolan. Easy 15 goals over the season.


----------



## mattie (Aug 8, 2011)

Game against Aldershot postponed.  Something about broken shop windows.  Carlton's shooting is wilder than I thought.


----------



## mattie (Aug 8, 2011)

tommers said:


> Honestly mate I've had a shit day. Went down to my dad's, watched the game. Found out I had a flat tyre, so changed that and missed the first ten minutes of the 2nd half. Watched the inevitable last minute goal. Went to a massive field to shoot clay things. Was greeted by a Millwall fan with 3 shotguns, laughing about it. Fella who lives at the end of the field calls the police cos he's worried we're going to shoot his horse. Police arrive, say it's fine and go away. Half hour later call back and say they can hear the shot falling on their car. Obviously a bit nervous about that, what with the stuff in Tottenham so they shut us down (po po shut us down). Drive all the way home and find out I trod in shit, which I then had to clean off.
> 
> It's a hard life being a west ham fan sometimes. Fuck knows what we've done to deserve all this.



When it rains, it pours.  I expect we'll have signed El Hadji Diouf by tomorrow morning.

Anyway, hope it's all picked up a bit.


----------



## editor (Aug 8, 2011)

It was a funny old game against Cardiff. I thought you were going to stuff us, then it settled into a dull kind of game with few chances. Come the second half it looked like we'd only made you angry and you were about to absolutely shaft us, but then your chances didn't go in and it was like your players collectively lost confidence.

I reckon you'll still do well though so good luck!


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 9, 2011)

We were a little unlucky I think but no complaints from me , we are going to get games like that over the course of the season but because it was our first home game it gets more attention . We did have far more opportunities than Cardiff but failed to take them . Sears should have been off earlier he was not having a good game at all , I think we will see Barrera start the next . Our back four looked fairly comfortable until Illunga slipped , in fact until then he was candidate for MoftheM . Taylor looked a handful . Nolan did what Nolan does . Parker was Ok but was clearly short of pace when put through . Piq and Cole were isolated yet again , not sure that Carew is going to be any different . I am not going to lose sleep just yet .
Well done Cardiff , its a long season , see you again soon .................


----------



## tommers (Aug 10, 2011)

Stella is back.

Kool and the gang.


----------



## mattie (Aug 10, 2011)

BFS moves quickly (metaphorically anyway) - give a goal away on the Sunday, someone in to take your place by the Wednesday.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 12, 2011)

collison has signed a new deal, which is nice.

dave


----------



## mattie (Aug 13, 2011)

kained&able said:


> collison has signed a new deal, which is nice.
> 
> dave



Good news.


----------



## mattie (Aug 14, 2011)

We won a game of football.  Will wonders never cease.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 15, 2011)

First win in a league game since March!
Second away win of the year!!
Clean sheet!!!


----------



## kained&able (Aug 15, 2011)

If we don't dick on watford i am officially rioting. I fucking hate those cunts.
dave


----------



## 1927 (Aug 15, 2011)

Looks like Dyer was a good signing for QPR!lol


----------



## kained&able (Aug 15, 2011)

17mins is 3 more then we ever got out of him!

dave


----------



## 1927 (Aug 15, 2011)

kained&able said:


> 17mins is 3 more then we ever got out of him!
> 
> dave



It was less than 5minutes! or did he place twice in pre season?lol


----------



## kained&able (Aug 15, 2011)

oh.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 16, 2011)

zavon hines is apprently off to burnley.

oh well.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 16, 2011)

4 fucking 0.

Eat it Watford.  Fuck you Dwight.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 16, 2011)

second clean sheet, and counting...


----------



## TruXta (Aug 17, 2011)

You found your level then?


----------



## kained&able (Aug 17, 2011)

sometimes i really think west ham loves me back. 

davr


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 19, 2011)

Bit of European football on telly last night; several goals, clean sheet, entertaining couple of hours... you'd have liked it.


----------



## tommers (Aug 19, 2011)

I thought you wanted out of that competition ASAP?

Have things changed?


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 19, 2011)

It's a bit like someone from down the road who pops around for a shag most Thursdays.


----------



## chieftain (Aug 19, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> It's a bit like someone from down the road who pops around for a shag most Thursdays.



They'd not be champions league in looks but still better than a second division English effort!


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 19, 2011)

Well, it's better than watching Torchwood - at least all the while it's not causing you grief.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 19, 2011)

What did the commentator say, only another 15 games 'til the Final......


----------



## tommers (Aug 19, 2011)

You lot change your minds more often than Gaga changes butchers.


----------



## chieftain (Aug 19, 2011)

tommers said:


> You lot change your minds more often than Gaga changes butchers.



We're just making the most of it, a Europey cup half full and all that gubbins


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 19, 2011)

tbf, it's quite difficult not liking beating any jocks 5-0.


----------



## tommers (Aug 19, 2011)

That did make me laugh tbh.  Have they posted some conspiracy theory about the mafia to explain it yet?


----------



## mattie (Aug 20, 2011)

We're on the box tomorrow.  Leeds.  SS1.

There ends the announcement.


----------



## Ponyutd (Aug 21, 2011)

Frederic Piquionne was fined £500 for dumping a car load of rubbish in a country lane last week. His solicitor said he may have been confused with this country's laws and the laws in France.
I don't recall the French having laws that allow you to throw your rubbish all over the countryside. You complete wanker


----------



## kained&able (Aug 21, 2011)

just in case people haven't been able to find myp2p's temporary home.

http://site.myp2pforum.eu/broadcast.php?matchid=126097&part=sports

dave


----------



## mattie (Aug 21, 2011)

kained&able said:


> just in case people haven't been able to find myp2p's temporary home.
> 
> http://site.myp2pforum.eu/broadcast.php?matchid=126097&part=sports
> 
> dave



ta dave, I was wondering what happened to myp2p.

Story on KUMB about mad dog asking someone to teach him how to whistle. Not a wind-up:
(why is the 'insert link' icon greyed out?  I'll type link here: http://www.nottscountyfc.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10426~2424681,00.html)


----------



## mattie (Aug 21, 2011)

Just started sopcast stream and we're 1-0 up.

I'm having difficulty adjusting.


----------



## tommers (Aug 21, 2011)

I think it's fair to say that this referee is a wanker.


----------



## mattie (Aug 21, 2011)

I think there's a song about that.


----------



## tommers (Aug 21, 2011)

Gradel looks good though.

Good first half... few tackles going in.  God knows how that fella didn't even get a yellow for trying to break Parker's shin.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 21, 2011)

he is annoying me it has to be said.

Really good game this. We will definitely need another goal but look like we are capable.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 21, 2011)

dirty leeds. 

probably a fair result but I would have like to beat em.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 21, 2011)

It's a great competition in the sense it'll be edge-of-the-seat stuff all season.


----------



## tommers (Aug 21, 2011)

Absolutely. I'm enjoying it loads more than the past couple of years. Proper stuff.


----------



## mattie (Aug 22, 2011)

3 decent finishes by Leeds.

Just as well, for parts of that game Kevin Nolan looked half-asleep.  Worrying about ickle Joey, no doubt.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 23, 2011)

3? errrr 

collison was the one that was asleep, he did nithning the entrie time he was on the pitch.

apparently illunga is off to qpr, which i wouldn't complain about.

sign joe bennet, sign joe bennet! Please, please please... not only is he class but it will wind up my boro mate.

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 23, 2011)

right, who's up next and how can we fuck it up?


----------



## tommers (Aug 23, 2011)

Forest away. On the telly.  Nuff said.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 23, 2011)

aldershot in the cup tomorrow!


----------



## tommers (Aug 24, 2011)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/dav...011/aug/23/carlos-tevez-legal-battle-revealed

Interesting stuff.


----------



## mattie (Aug 24, 2011)

kained&able said:


> 3? errrr
> 
> collison was the one that was asleep, he did nithning the entrie time he was on the pitch.
> 
> ...



The won goal, dave.  Cartlon would have been thrilled with that finish.

I'd love Illunga to go.  He's been a liability for a while.


----------



## mattie (Aug 24, 2011)

tommers said:


> http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/dav...011/aug/23/carlos-tevez-legal-battle-revealed
> 
> Interesting stuff.



I've only scanned that article - how many people can sue us off the back of it?


----------



## kained&able (Aug 24, 2011)

sorry mattie still don't get you. They scored two? three good finishes by them doesn't compute. Unless there is a joke im missing.

im so so glad he never took us over. Would have found the club three years later at the bottom of a river.

dave


----------



## mattie (Aug 24, 2011)

kained&able said:


> sorry mattie still don't get you. They scored two? three good finishes by them doesn't compute. Unless there is a joke im missing.
> 
> im so so glad he never took us over. Would have found the club three years later at the bottom of a river.
> 
> dave



Kisnorbo's beauty to put us 2-1 up.

Yep, the Icelandics were pretty piss-poor but Kia is on a different planet.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 24, 2011)

ahh yes now i understand. OG, of course.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 24, 2011)

Spurs / Orient have been granted a judicial review of the OS decision - to ascertain whether the loan from Newham constitutes "state aid" and is therefore illegal.

Not sure how that works but hey ho.


----------



## agricola (Aug 24, 2011)

tommers said:


> Spurs / Orient have been granted a judicial review of the OS decision - to ascertain whether the loan from Newham constitutes "state aid" and is therefore illegal.
> 
> Not sure how that works but hey ho.



Spurs have no case, but Orient blatantly do.


----------



## tommers (Aug 24, 2011)

Oh god.  Do we have to?


----------



## 1927 (Aug 24, 2011)

Let's be honest we all knew Aldershot would win!


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 25, 2011)

Just to state the obv. it is all over now - Wet Sham have the athletics stadium and Tottenham have the regeneration money! Merry Christmas!!


----------



## tommers (Aug 25, 2011)

West Ham issued a statement last night, following on from the OS decision yesterday.  It doesn't seem to have been reported much in the press so I thought I'd put it up here.

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20110824/west-ham-united-statement_2236884_2431058




			
				Forces of Light said:
			
		

> *“In response to media inquiries, we can confirm that West Ham today received a document from Tottenham asking us to give up our claims against them in relation to the above, in return for Tottenham withdrawing their judicial review proceedings. West Ham naturally refused.*


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 25, 2011)

What do I know, except the DPA also has a public interest defence and this is all about public money.

The Computer Misuse Act doesn't, but does anyone know what is alleged under that Act?


----------



## tommers (Aug 25, 2011)

Explain that a bit more slowly.

Ta.


----------



## tommers (Aug 25, 2011)

I think I see what you're saying.  Be interesting to see how that goes.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 25, 2011)

The police are looking at possible criminal activity in relation to the Data Protection Act and this Computer Misuse Act. Under the former, the accused can say 'I did it in the public interest' and, if that defence is accepted (by the police/CPA or jury), then no crime has been committed.

You can only raise the 'public interest defence' if it is available under the relevant law and you satisfy the criteria to the police/CPA or jury. The fact of so much public money being involved and in various ways, strongly suggests the defence would be raised in relation to any charges under the Data Protection Act. Whether succesfully or not ...

The defence isn't available under the Computer Misuse Act, but then we don't know what's being alleged under that Act.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 25, 2011)

Tbh, I've probably over-simplified that. I_ think_ the defence, nowadays, is generally available even when not specifically stated in the relevant Act.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 25, 2011)

apprently burnley are trying to sign stanislas.

the words fuck off comes to mind.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 25, 2011)

I liked it when they got rid of all the old players but they don't seem to be able to stop.


----------



## tommers (Aug 26, 2011)

We've signed baldock from Mk dons. Any views?


----------



## kained&able (Aug 26, 2011)

never seen him play to be honest.

barerra has fucked off to spain for the rest of the season as he can't understand all the apple and pears talk or something.

will ask walsall mates if they have an opinion. anything that annoys any mcdons fans is fine by me though.
dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 26, 2011)

KUMB also have us signing some paraguayan called Brian Montenegro.

Sounds like something out of Phoenix Nights or a film with Danny Dyer in it.

He has no wiki page.  can you imagine?  A footballer without a wiki page?

The only thing I can find is something on goal.com which just has his name and that he played for paraguay u-20s.  No picture either.

The only thing on Google images that looks remotely like a footballer is a picture of brian Laudrup.

I think it's a joke.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 26, 2011)

Nope, it's just The Championship.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 26, 2011)

checked with mates. they are thanking us for getting him the hell away from their league  he is more then capable of stepping up to the championship.

baldock is fast as fuck has a good shot and should be able to play off carew/piquonne very well indeed, apparently.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 28, 2011)

4-1.  Eat it, Robin Hood.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 28, 2011)

boom


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 28, 2011)

Elliot Lee son of NUFC legend Rob Lee scored a hattrick for your reserves against Sunderland reserves today. What do you lot think of him? Seen him play?


----------



## tommers (Aug 28, 2011)

I thought it was U18s?  It's his 3rd hattrick in a row.  I know it's U18s and everything but still....


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 28, 2011)

Aye, my mistake. Academy match. Still... could be a sign of things to come.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 29, 2011)

we have olly lee at our place as well, think he made the league cup squad in the past week.

dave


----------



## mattie (Aug 29, 2011)

Are there any highlights on the box?  Can't find any on the guide.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 29, 2011)

try footytube.com


----------



## tommers (Aug 29, 2011)

Tbf none of the goals were brilliant.  Still, 4-1, away, against one of our supposed rivals. Can't complain.

I like this division. Every game is competitive, can we just stay here?


----------



## kained&able (Aug 29, 2011)

no


----------



## tommers (Aug 29, 2011)

But Dave, I hate it in the Prem, it's fucking miserable.

Anyway,  there have been updates from Dave Sullivan's son. Brian is singing today and is super fast.  Dad doesn't want Scott to leave but he is desperate to go.

I love him.


----------



## Ponyutd (Aug 29, 2011)

What is Brian going to sing?....just out of interest.


----------



## tommers (Aug 29, 2011)

Always look on the bright side of life, I imagine.


----------



## mattie (Aug 29, 2011)

I feel I should perhaps know this - who's Brian, and where is he singing?


----------



## tommers (Aug 29, 2011)

Brian Montenegro our new Paraguayan superstar.

He signed today.


----------



## mattie (Aug 29, 2011)

I like him already.


----------



## Ponyutd (Aug 29, 2011)

mattie said:


> I like him already.



What do you think of his girlfriend?


----------



## Ponyutd (Aug 29, 2011)

http://theboleyninheritance.wordpress.com/2011/08/29/bienvenida-brian-montenegro/


----------



## tommers (Aug 29, 2011)

I think he might be my new hero.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 29, 2011)

I missed the part about what he's  achieved in football?

But it's good you've got another one who can run fast, lets hope this one isn't on a 5-year, £83,000 a week contract....


----------



## Refused as fuck (Aug 29, 2011)

Like Crouchy.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 30, 2011)

You probably know mre then me but, at least imo, this journo is the best informed about what's actually afoot at WHL:



> It still seems likely that he will join Spurs – Parker has made it clear he does not want to stay at *West Ham* while the club are in the Championship – but there was a hitch on Sunday evening.
> 
> 
> West Ham were willing to finally negotiate over the fee with Spurs having offered a deal close to £6 million with a player also going to Upton Park on loan for the season. That player was thought to be one of Spurs’ promising youngsters, most probably midfielder Jake Livermore.


Livermore might be a good idea for everyone?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/fo...st-Ham-to-Tottenham-hangs-in-the-balance.html


----------



## tommers (Aug 30, 2011)

I think that's all pretty much what's going on.  I don't think Livermore wants to come here though.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 30, 2011)

parker has thrown in a transfer request. dont really get the point but i guess it saves a golden hand shake so umm thanks.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Aug 30, 2011)

ohh look we have signed papa bouba diop.

not bad.


----------



## Balbi (Aug 30, 2011)

Injury prone when he was with us.

Play him centre mid, he'll do an alright job. Try and give him a job to the left or right and he'll flounder. Hope he rediscovers his scoring form.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 30, 2011)

on a free so not too much can go wrong. and he will be a better option then fucking kovac.

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 30, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Nope, it's just The Championship.



you'll love it down here, as you'll discover if your boys don't pull their fingers out.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 30, 2011)

Ponyutd said:


> What do you think of his girlfriend?



i think it might be illegal to think of his girlfriend...


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 30, 2011)

also, bodes well:

While the first Paraguayan to play for the club, Montenegro follows notable list of South Americans to wear the claret and blue, including Nolberto Solano (Peru), Javier Margas and Luis Jimenez (Chile) and Javier Mascherano, Lionel Scaloni and Carlos Tevez (Argentina).


----------



## mattie (Aug 31, 2011)

This should be in a Swindon thread, but....Paolo

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/aug/31/paolo-di-canio-leon-clarke


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 31, 2011)

He's about as suitable to be a football a manager as Dale Winton.


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

He lasted longer than I thought.

All sounds like a bit of a storm in a teacup, mind.


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

We've signed Henri Lansbury on a year's loan.

Coolio.


----------



## mattie (Aug 31, 2011)

We're doing alright, aren't we?

Remind me, has Illunga gone?  If so, colour me tickled pink.


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 31, 2011)

according to KUMB it fell through because they only wanted 6 months and he insisted on a year


----------



## hammerntongues (Aug 31, 2011)

but kumb are also talking Bentley and Owen to UP as well , this championship lark aint so bad after all.............


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

Bentley's confirmed on SSN apparently.... I'll believe it when he tells us how he stood in the chicken run as a kid.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 31, 2011)

*NEW SIGNING TO BE ANNOUNCED SHORTLY ON WWW.WHUFC.COM! just posted on facebook.*


This makes me wet.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 31, 2011)

I supppose you're part way there anyway but, if Bentley stays fit and interested, that's you petty well promoted.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 31, 2011)

was he at blackburn under FS?  if so that was his GOOD times, hopefully sam can get him up to the sort of form he's capable of.  potentially a great signing.  or an awful one...


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 31, 2011)

tommers said:


> We've signed Henri Lansbury on a year's loan.
> 
> Coolio.



that's a damn good thing, with an option to make it perm if he's successful.  that's the sort of bargaining that we ought to be doing to ensure a successful loanee doesn't disappear as to often happens to clubs that get promoted or are chasing it the next season.


----------



## mattie (Aug 31, 2011)

tommers said:


> Bentley's confirmed on SSN apparently.... I'll believe it when he tells us how he stood in the chicken run as a kid.



That's linked to Scotty P going the other way, I assume?

If so, he's dead to me now.

eta:  Yes, yes, he's gone.  Poor Scotty P, he's not really a ready-made Modric replacement, and god alone knows what agent bungpuss made him go through.


----------



## London_Calling (Aug 31, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> potentially a great signing. or an awful one...



Def the former. He'd be playing a part at Tottenham if 'arry could bear the sight of him - def a top 6 player, hugely influential at Championship level.

Problem comes this time next year when you want to buy him and Levy wants a fortune.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 31, 2011)

with any luck there's something in the contract about it.  but to be fair, assuming we wanted 8m for scott and we got 5 and bentley for a year, 3m for a year of him performing at his best is a fucking bargain.  assuming he performs his best.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 31, 2011)

stanislas has fucked off too burnley. i reckon that one will bite us in the arse at some point.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

We've signed Guy Demel.  He's a right back.

I'm quite pleased, got to be said.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 31, 2011)

i know the name really well but no sure i have ever actually seen him play. Still rb was one of the places we were weak at so sweet.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

I don't mean I'm particularly pleased about Demel, but more with the whole window.  We've got a proper squad now that isn't full of kids and no full backs and some shonky foreign "trequartista" who can't run.

And we've got Brian Montenegro.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 31, 2011)

just needed to get shot of cfc and i too wold be a most happy bunny.

dave


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

I've mellowed about him.  He rejected Stoke and Fulham to stay with us.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 31, 2011)

i dont doubt his character just his talent! Unfortunately the old adage "form is temporary but class is permanent" works both ways

dave


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 31, 2011)

there's only one brian montenegro!


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 31, 2011)

now all we need is a Montenegran called Brian Paraguay.


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

Ins - Nolan, Taylor, O'Brien, McCartney, Diop, Lansbury, Bentley, Demel, Montenegro, Carew, Baldock & Faye - 12

Outs - Stanislas, Barrera, Parker, Spector, Da Costa, Hines, Ba, Obinna, Gabbidon, Dyer, Bridge, LBM, Keane, Hitzlsperger, Kovac, Jacobsen, Upson - 17

Good god am I glad to see the back of most of them.  We got rid of a lot of crap.


----------



## bluestreak (Aug 31, 2011)

actually, fuck it, brian paraguay is going to be next troll account i set up.


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

*jsullivanwhu* Jack Sullivan

In; nolan, taylor, faye, o'brien, diop, baldock, montenegro, bentley, lansbury, mccartney, carew ,demel!!!! 13 player in what a window


A private education obviously pays off.


----------



## kained&able (Aug 31, 2011)

edit: oh no i just dont know the difference between faye and slaif diao. what a tit.


----------



## mattie (Aug 31, 2011)

I'm not sure I find a surname of Montenegro or a given name for a Paraguayan of Brian more amusing.

I'm getting his name printed on the back of my shirt.  The full name.

Of all those that left, I'd have happily kept maybe Ba, Obinna (on early form), Bridge (on a tenth of the wages), Hitz and the legend that is Scott Parker.  Not a bad window's work by BFS.  Not a Savio in sight.


----------



## tommers (Aug 31, 2011)

Yeah, same for me.  I really really wanted barrera to be good but he just didn't settle.

I'm actually looking forward to a season.   Blimey.


----------



## kained&able (Sep 1, 2011)

i said our yoots that came through are still playing but playing for someone else are better then man city's on another thread. I think i should prove that.

Gk: Stephen Bywater (derby)
lb: Paul konchesky( fulham)
cb: rio ferdinand(man u)
cb: John terry(chelsea)
rb: glenn johnson (liverpool)

lw: Keriron richardson(sunderland)
cm: micheal carrick( man united)
cm: totally fat wank lumplard (chelsea)
rw: Joe cole( lille/liverpool)

cf: Jermaine defoe (totscum)
cf: bobby zamora(fulham)

bench from: freddy eastwood, sol campbell, chris cohen, j lloyd samuel, jimmy bullard, liam ridgwell, leon britton

other then bywater that is a fairly good team really.

Any glaring omissions?

dave


----------



## tommers (Sep 1, 2011)

None that I can see Dave.

Care to attempt the next first team against Portsmouth?


----------



## kained&able (Sep 1, 2011)

ooohh we can actually start doing that can't we!

gk: Green
lb: illunga
cb: tomkins
cb: faye/reid
rb: o'brian

cmid: noble
cmid: nolan
cmid: taylor

fw: bentley
fw: lansbury

cf: piquonne

maybe?

ill be honest really not sure about the midfield and fowards.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Sep 1, 2011)

I`d find it tough to leave out Collison but quite where he fits in ? I also prefer CC to Piq but not a fag paper between them really  , both the same player .


----------



## kained&able (Sep 1, 2011)

piquonne is more creative in my opinion(ie he can play a pass) but yeah fairly similar, cole is probably a bit stronger.

really wasn't impressed with collison in the last full game i saw of his, presume he is just lacking sharpness after his massive layoff. Out of my proposed team you could easily push matty taylor a bit forward instead of lansbury and chuck collison into the centre.

dave


----------



## tommers (Sep 1, 2011)

I think I'd go...

Green
McCartney
Tomkins
Reid / Faye
O'Brien

Bentley
Nolan
Noble
Taylor

Baldock
Cole

The only thing that worries me is the complete lack of pace.  (Well, apart from Baldock.)

I have a sneaking suspicion that it'll be the same team with newcomers on the bench....


----------



## kained&able (Sep 1, 2011)

i dont want to scare anyone but el hadj diouf has just left blackburn by mutual consent.

dave


----------



## tommers (Sep 1, 2011)

He can piss right off.


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 1, 2011)

He's just been seen at City Airport getting in a cab.


----------



## tommers (Sep 1, 2011)

T'riffic player.  Anybody would love to have him playing for them.  T'riffic.  Jamie said to me the other day "that Dioufy is magic, Dad" and who am I to argue with him?  He's an England player!  More than I ever did!  I played in a team with Moore, Hurst and Peters and we still came bottom, shows how bad the rest of us were!


----------



## tommers (Sep 1, 2011)

Sorry, I went all Derek Acorah then for a minute.  I feel a bit soiled.  Got a sudden craving to open up an offshore bank account.


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 1, 2011)

It's ok, he only been looking at rentals in Chadwell Heath.


----------



## tommers (Sep 10, 2011)

Same team as forest but with lansbury instead of collison


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 10, 2011)

Got some left foot that Taylor...


----------



## Diamond (Sep 10, 2011)

Anyone got a streaming site that's worthwhile?


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 11, 2011)

are we so used to winning already that no-one has felt the need to comment? that lansbury looks alright, so he does. and another carlton goal, perhaps he's found his level. we're nearly as good as the teams promoted from league one


----------



## kained&able (Sep 11, 2011)

lansbury looks class and that looked a highly entertaining game.

dave


----------



## tommers (Sep 11, 2011)

I didn't see it. Are there highlights anywhere?


----------



## kained&able (Sep 11, 2011)

grab the league show off iplayer, its the first match on so easy enough to find

dave


----------



## tommers (Sep 11, 2011)

Thanks Dave, that was easier than I thought.


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 11, 2011)

I see Bentley got half an hour - did he break a sweat?

Noble's up-the-arse face:


----------



## kained&able (Sep 12, 2011)

i have signed up for west ham tv which means i get all the highlights and stuff.

inlcuding us thumping the tottenham reserves tonight. niiice.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 12, 2011)

Given the injuries and fixture list, Tottenham could have a few Acadamy kids playing.


----------



## kained&able (Sep 12, 2011)

i'd be shocked if he didnt as well! but carew, collison and benltey might also get a game.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Sep 12, 2011)

*West Ham United XI: *Boffin, Demel, Carney, Faye, Diop, Moncur, Sears, Juca, Nouble, Piquionne, Carew
Subs: Cowler, Driver, Wearen, Montenegro, Turgott, E.Lee

so ummmm errr thats fairly experience.
Juca and David Carney are trialists. Looks like carney is an lb and luca is a winger/midfielder of some description.
Our site doesnt care about the spurs line up.

1-1 at the minute.

Oh and robert hall out england u17 player has gone out on loan to oxford for a month.

if you ask nicely might chuck up the highlights as i have westham tv this season!

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 12, 2011)

Has the Tottenham team got anyone coming back from injury?


----------



## tommers (Sep 12, 2011)

Montenegro only makes the bench  

He is super quick!


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 12, 2011)

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20110912/spurs-2-2-development-squad_2236884_2448299

2 all in the end.  not sure the score really matters, it's the game time for some of the newbies.

juca used to be at partizan. carney was at blackpool and got a couple of premier games last season.  it says here.


----------



## mattie (Sep 12, 2011)

That was a pretty wanky sending off for Piquionne.

I saw an interview Pat Nevin did with the Guardian where he suggested Match of the Day should have a section devoted to taking the piss out of divers. The idea being to try to create a culture where it's seen as shameful to con a ref by Berkamping or Rivaldoing all over the show.

I remember discussing it with my bro who works in telly a few years back, he said it'll never happen as you could forget any interviews or post-match commentary from any player you'd mocked.

Which, to my mind, is a win-win situation.

Anyone with me?


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 12, 2011)

me please.


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 12, 2011)

Oh I see, it's not the reserves. No wonder I couldn't see it on the Tottenham site...


----------



## chieftain (Sep 12, 2011)

mattie said:


> That was a pretty wanky sending off for Piquionne.
> 
> I saw an interview Pat Nevin did with the Guardian where he suggested Match of the Day should have a section devoted to taking the piss out of divers. The idea being to try to create a culture where it's seen as shameful to con a ref by Berkamping or Rivaldoing all over the show.
> 
> ...



Count me in


----------



## kained&able (Sep 12, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Oh I see, it's not the reserves. No wonder I couldn't see it on the Tottenham site...


i think arry did away with the reserves at spurs didn't he?

thats what my boss reckons anyway, but he is spurs fan so knows fuck all.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 12, 2011)

I don't know either - couldn't find mention of them on the site. Perhaps to do with the 25-man squad rule. Fwiw, we've got 6 injured (bare bones) and have 4 games a week 'til Jan 2014.

'kin daft Thursday TV Trophy.


----------



## kained&able (Sep 13, 2011)

yeah boss reckons you just want to send every reserve player out on loan.

Which kinda makes sense.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Sep 13, 2011)

2014? are you from the future or just predicting another uefa run next season?

dave


----------



## tommers (Sep 13, 2011)

4 games a week?!?

Let's face it LC, your post is riddled with inconsistencies.


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 13, 2011)

Surely not!

Seriously, you have to think the reserve team issue is a knock-on from the squad size rule.


----------



## kained&able (Sep 13, 2011)

far as i know your the only team that has done this though.

Besides your allowed as many under 23's in your squad as you want if they have been trained in england.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 13, 2011)

I have no idea... have you got a reserve side or a develpment side or both? I don't even kow what that Tottenham team that played you was called,  apart from an XI


----------



## tommers (Sep 13, 2011)

I think it's more to do with the change to 5 subs.

Altho God knows why our's are now called the 'development squad '


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 13, 2011)

it's political correctness gone mad.


----------



## kained&able (Sep 13, 2011)

tommers said:


> I think it's more to do with the change to 5 subs.
> 
> Altho God knows why our's are now called the 'development squad '



cos its not the reserve league yet so it gets called something else. like how prteason its called select 11 or whatever.

dave


----------



## tommers (Sep 16, 2011)

Big one tomorrow.  Scabby buggers.


----------



## mattie (Sep 16, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> me please.






chieftain said:


> Count me in


Lovely.
Right, when I can be arsed I'll create a thread and start adding vids - I might wait until after MOTD tomorrow for some inspiration, I'm sure I won't be disappointed.
You'd better join in or I'll look daft and friendless.  Again.
In the meantime, ideas for monstrous dives, shirks and minces appreciated.


----------



## mattie (Sep 16, 2011)

tommers said:


> Big one tomorrow. Scabby buggers.



We'll 'ave 'em.

BFS'll eat 'em.  Literally.  Beats the chippies and kebab houses on the Barking Road, I suppose.

I thought a 12:30 KO might mean we're on the box, but I can't find it if it is.


----------



## tommers (Sep 17, 2011)

I think it's just a "don't kill each other " thing.


----------



## mattie (Sep 17, 2011)

tommers said:


> I think it's just a "don't kill each other " thing.



I always wonder if early KOs just mean the hangovers will still be in force and everyone will be more grumpy.

I saw 'Rise of the Footsoldier' last night, It was highly recommended on a Loveflm stream.  It was shit.  It must have been highly recommended by the lads who are going along today.


----------



## mattie (Sep 17, 2011)

anyone found a stream?  Doing some homework and v, v bored.


----------



## tommers (Sep 17, 2011)

No, it's on BBC London but only on the net and sky.


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 17, 2011)

how dull.


----------



## tommers (Sep 17, 2011)

Yeah. Glad there wasn't any trouble though.

Point there is ok, they always raise their game - 3 nil loss last time wasn't it?


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 18, 2011)

apparently young lansbury took a shot from the halfway line after a few seconds cos he'd seen their goalie hadn't woken up yet.  i LIKE  his style.

in other news, young savio has done a bunk from another club.  some people aren't cut out for the sporting life i guess.


----------



## tommers (Sep 26, 2011)

David Gold Twitter said:
			
		

> *DavidGoldWHU* David Gold
> 
> “@stewer7: @DavidGoldWHU any news about seats at olympic stadium,will they be closer to the pitch( please say yes )” not got it yet but yes



Oh, and another win.


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 26, 2011)

Excellent. He's discovered a fifth dimension.


----------



## hammerntongues (Sep 26, 2011)

It`s not pretty at all but another 3 points , it wont be long before we are bitching about the style of football though . Why he doesn`t play 2 up front at home is a worry , I can take a more defensive line-up away from home ( partly because I don`t have to watch it I suppose ) but at home ?


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 26, 2011)

And Carlton Cole still hasn't found his level....


----------



## tommers (Sep 26, 2011)

He's scored 4, or 5... not really sure what you want off him.

Hammer - people on KUMB already bitching about it.  Unbelievable.  They've forgotten the 4-3, 4-1, 4-0 and the entire previous 2 seasons it seems.


----------



## hammerntongues (Sep 26, 2011)

tommers said:


> He's scored 4, or 5... not really sure what you want off him.
> 
> Hammer - people on KUMB already bitching about it. Unbelievable. They've forgotten the 4-3, 4-1, 4-0 and the entire previous 2 seasons it seems.



We look very solid at the back , Faye was excellent on Saturday alongside Reid ,Tomkins came on for 15mins or so so obviously fit again . Nolan does lack a bit of mobility but its not a surprise is it ? thats not why he was brought in . I just wish we would be a little more adventurous up front at home , I think maybe we will see Carew start tmrw night with Baldock , I think CC has a runny nose. Carew looked very strong on Saturday .


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 26, 2011)

tommers said:


> He's scored 4, or 5... not really sure what you want off him.


Well, it's all relative to genuine chances, as well as quality of opposition. What's he squandering...


----------



## tommers (Sep 26, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Well, it's all relative to genuine chances, as well as quality of opposition. What's he squandering...


You can't say he hasn't found his level and then say he isn't doing well cos of the opposition.


----------



## mattie (Sep 26, 2011)

tommers said:


> He's scored 4, or 5... not really sure what you want off him.



A weak joke, is what I think he wanted.

'BFS not committed to West Ham', rants mattie:
http://www.football365.com/news/21554/7204135/Right-On-Cue...Allardyce-Talks-England-Again


----------



## tommers (Sep 26, 2011)

I can't see it happening, Harry's much more acceptable to people. I really want him to be England manager.


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 26, 2011)

Not exactly overloaded with choices.... I just wish 'arry wasn't fav.



tommers said:


> You can't say he hasn't found his level and then say he isn't doing well cos of the opposition.


Yeah you can. He's got a quality team around him and he still messes up far more than he should - at least that's what the radio says and the radio is always right ...


----------



## mattie (Sep 26, 2011)

tommers said:


> I can't see it happening, Harry's much more acceptable to people. I really want him to be England manager.



We'd never get lumpafuckinglard out of the team.  To be honest, I've long since passed the point where I cared, so it would be worth it just for the laughs.

Jamie as kitman and Lovely Louise as Rooney's hairstylist.


----------



## tommers (Sep 26, 2011)

mattie said:


> We'd never get lumpafuckinglard out of the team. To be honest, I've long since passed the point where I cared, so it would be worth it just for the laughs.
> 
> Jamie as kitman and Lovely Louise as Rooney's hairstylist.



It would make it even funnier when they mess up.  Old saggy face looking depressed and telling us Moldova are actually a really good team.


----------



## mattie (Sep 26, 2011)

tommers said:


> It would make it even funnier when they mess up. Old saggy face looking depressed and telling us Moldova are actually a really good team.



The foreign interviewers could be fun.  I wonder what the Italian for 'wheeler dealer' is?


----------



## tommers (Sep 27, 2011)

Berlusconi.


----------



## mattie (Sep 27, 2011)

tommers said:


> Berlusconi.



Bunga Bungpuss.


----------



## tommers (Sep 27, 2011)

Last minute goal AND scored by Lee bowyer.  The division has changed but the story remains the same.


----------



## tommers (Sep 27, 2011)

I look forward to him scoring the winner in injury time for gillingham against us  when he's 39.


----------



## Lo Siento. (Sep 27, 2011)

there's no itfc thread, cause we're small time. But I can just say "geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet in, fucking yes". Allardyce is a fucking twat, you were all over us until he switched to Carew based hoof-ball.


----------



## hammerntongues (Sep 28, 2011)

Lo Siento. said:


> there's no itfc thread, cause we're small time. But I can just say "geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet in, fucking yes". Allardyce is a fucking twat, you were all over us until he switched to Carew based hoof-ball.



Not the way I saw it , we were dire from the off , maybe 20 mins of control in the second half otherwise you deserved it completely . We were totally lacking in ideas , hoof to Cole for 60 mins then Carew for the last 30 , I watched 90 mins of the same shite on Saturday and we won with a lucky penalty , last night was just plain dull.

We would have been top with a win yesterday but there were boos at the final whistle .


----------



## London_Calling (Sep 28, 2011)

hammerntongues said:


> hoof to Cole for 60 mins then Carew for the last 30 , I watched 90 mins of the same shite on Saturday and we won with a lucky penalty , last night was just plain dull.


I'd think pretty well everyone knows Fat Sam is there to do one job only, and pretty well everyone knows Fat Sam only knows one way to do that: the idea is promotion, pretty football can't enter the equation.

Wants to be England manager as well.....


----------



## Kanda (Sep 28, 2011)

Went to the game, it was terrible! I did have Bowyer to score first at 21/1 though


----------



## Lo Siento. (Sep 28, 2011)

hammerntongues said:


> Not the way I saw it , we were dire from the off , maybe 20 mins of control in the second half otherwise you deserved it completely . We were totally lacking in ideas , hoof to Cole for 60 mins then Carew for the last 30 , I watched 90 mins of the same shite on Saturday and we won with a lucky penalty , last night was just plain dull.
> 
> We would have been top with a win yesterday but there were boos at the final whistle .



I must say, even in the 20 minutes you dominated we looked pretty solid defensively. It's a long time since we've had a central defence as imposing as Sonko and Collins.


----------



## tommers (Sep 28, 2011)

You've got a decent team, pretty much all ex-prem.


----------



## bluestreak (Sep 30, 2011)

why is this happening still i wonder.  even though we've changed most of the players we still start playing for a draw at around 75 minutes and then concede in the last few as they wander around the pitch wondering what DVD they're going to watch tonight.


----------



## Refused as fuck (Sep 30, 2011)

a few of yours are blaming it all on Kevin Nolan.


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 2, 2011)

i've not heard about that, any links?

how did we play against palace anyone?


----------



## Refused as fuck (Oct 2, 2011)

http://www.kumb.com/article.php?id=2944


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 3, 2011)

interesting.


----------



## tommers (Oct 3, 2011)

He's in the championship team of the week again this week!

Opinions,  arseholes etc


----------



## mattie (Oct 3, 2011)

I'll agree that whenever I've seen us play Nolan has looked a touch off the pace, but in saying that KUMB sometimes seem in a world of their own.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 4, 2011)

illunga has gone to doncaster on loan till january. Umm i missing something? doesn't that leave us with just stella that can play lb?

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 4, 2011)

kained&able said:


> illunga has gone to doncaster on loan till january. Umm i missing something? doesn't that leave us with just stella that can play lb?
> 
> dave



Well, the cynic might say that even with Illunga in the squad we still only had McCartney who could play at left-back.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 4, 2011)

tis true, he lacks motivation and talent after a promising first season.

BUT im fairly sure if mccarthy is out that leaves us with matty taylor and thats it. I can't think of a decent yoot coming through at lb and i dont think any of our centre backs are left footed.

Me thinks we will need an emeregcny loan or something. I vote bring back daprela i liked him.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 4, 2011)

He'll just play Taylor there won't he?

There's Jordan Brown too, but he's off on loan with somebody.

Or they'd recall Ilunga maybe?


----------



## mattie (Oct 4, 2011)

Specs would have done a job, god love him.  You only notice him when he's gone.  Or scoring goals against Man U.

Speaking of past players, can you imagine Boa Morte as emergency left back?


----------



## tommers (Oct 4, 2011)

I would love that.  Seriously.

And Abou in goal.

Football's too serious.  They should do stupid stuff more often.  It's only a game.


----------



## chieftain (Oct 4, 2011)

Did Palace really let an Eagle fly around the ground at half time and did one of your meatheads really throw a burger at it causing it to attack and then bugger off completely not to be seen again??

Quality, more so than on the pitch


----------



## tommers (Oct 4, 2011)

On the crack again chief?


----------



## mattie (Oct 4, 2011)

tommers said:


> I would love that. Seriously.
> 
> And Abou in goal.
> 
> Football's too serious. They should do stupid stuff more often. It's only a game.



I picture it something like this:



Boris might be looking for work come the next Mayoral elections.  I'd be up for it.


----------



## tommers (Oct 4, 2011)

That tackle is responsible for him being mayor.

Well, that and his hair.


----------



## mattie (Oct 4, 2011)

Is this locked yet?  I just couldn't bear my last post to be about Boris Johnson


----------



## mattie (Oct 4, 2011)

No, obviously.


----------



## editor (Oct 4, 2011)

mattie said:


> Is this locked yet? I just couldn't bear my last post to be about Boris Johnson


The locking was only an idea although the Boris video surely deserves a thread of its own.


----------



## tommers (Oct 4, 2011)

Eh? Locked?


----------



## mattie (Oct 4, 2011)

tommers said:


> Eh? Locked?



Blame strung out.


----------



## mattie (Oct 4, 2011)

editor said:


> The locking was only an idea although the Boris video surely deserves a thread of its own.



It is mint, isn't it.  Makes you proud to be British.


----------



## tommers (Oct 4, 2011)

We beat Thurrock 2-0 tonight.

Brian Montenegro played.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 4, 2011)

did our preseason glampour tie get proponed till today to be some kind of mid season money spinner?

team was:

*West Ham United:* Kurucz, Driver, K Lee, Potts, Shaw, Sears, Moncur, Lletget, Montenegro, Piquionne, Baldock
*Subs:* Cowler, Siafa, Hurley, Young, Turgott, E Lee, Sadlier

I hear/save seen good things from, mini-moncs, lletget(like really good things), baldock(league 1 mate was so happy walsall didnt have to play against him this season) turgott(very good things!) and elliott lee.

hopefully whutv will have highlights. We have a friendly against mcdons on friday as well.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 4, 2011)

C'mon Dave, we both know it's all about Montenegro.

You can pretend all you like.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 4, 2011)

he does havea good name. still not actually seen him kick a ball.

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 5, 2011)

He plays football now?

I reckon he's got the best goal celebration ever.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 5, 2011)

what do you think brian montenegro would do?

dave


----------



## kained&able (Oct 5, 2011)

and more importantly is it worth its own thread!

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 5, 2011)

Of course he is. He's worth the whole world and everything in it.


----------



## chieftain (Oct 5, 2011)

tommers said:


> On the crack again chief?



No fella, my mate Jason was there with your lot and told me about it.


----------



## tommers (Oct 5, 2011)

Maybe he's on crack?  Have you thought of that?


----------



## chieftain (Oct 5, 2011)

tommers said:


> Maybe he's on crack? Have you thought of that?



Very possibly


----------



## mattie (Oct 5, 2011)

Just checking it still works.


----------



## tommers (Oct 5, 2011)

look at him...







LOOK AT HIM!


----------



## mattie (Oct 5, 2011)

There is no way he's called Brian.


----------



## tommers (Oct 5, 2011)

I'm not bothered if we get promoted this season.  I just want him to play, every game.


----------



## mattie (Oct 6, 2011)

BFS is getting ideas above his station:


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 7, 2011)

so what's going on.  this thread isn't broken, it just seems to have spawned a lot of west ham related injoke subthreads.  not that i disapprove, but i like the fact that most years we have the longest threads thus proving we are the most interesting and well supported team on urban.  and have the best banter.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 7, 2011)

I rode along Allardyce Road in Brixton this afternoon. Not, you'll understand, in homage to the hoofing fat fuck but... well, it's all I've got atm....


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 7, 2011)

should have started a new thread, LC.


----------



## mattie (Oct 7, 2011)

Jesus wept.

http://www.football365.com/news/21554/7229300/A-Dire-Setback-For-The-Crocked-Kieron-Dyer


----------



## mattie (Oct 7, 2011)

Imagine him and Brian:
http://kumb.com/story.php?id=125730

Little'n'large(r), Saint'n'Greavsie, Cannon and Ball.


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 7, 2011)

mattie said:


> Jesus wept.
> 
> http://www.football365.com/news/21554/7229300/A-Dire-Setback-For-The-Crocked-Kieron-Dyer



kieron man, i admire your perseverance but you're running out of bits to crock.  go home, find a non-strenuous hobby, enjoy your millions, but for god sake man stop playing football,


----------



## mattie (Oct 9, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> kieron man, i admire your perseverance but you're running out of bits to crock. go home, find a non-strenuous hobby, enjoy your millions, but for god sake man stop playing football,



I can only assume he moonlights as a stuntman - a very clumsy stuntman - as I can't see how you can get that injured playing an hour of football a season.


----------



## tommers (Oct 9, 2011)

Montano has been recalled from notts Co.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 9, 2011)

whos injured?

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 9, 2011)

Not Keiron Dyer.


----------



## tommers (Oct 9, 2011)

Bentley.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 9, 2011)

ohh thank god for that! Its not sum1 who can actually finish more then just a wank.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Oct 10, 2011)

hold on does that mean we are going to have to resort to freddie sears? or are montono or montenegro going to step up to the plate?

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 10, 2011)

Come on Dave, there's only one answer.


----------



## mattie (Oct 10, 2011)

Even without Brian, it surely couldn't be Freddie Sears, could it?


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-15251893


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

Good lord.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

im pretty sure they cant pull out at this stage we have contracts and stuff.

well without it costing them.

dave


----------



## marty21 (Oct 11, 2011)

Hammers to share with the Orient?


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

Haha. There'll be about 12 people there! And as for the orient games...


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

i haz asked david gold over twitter innit blud.


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

Good stuff Dave. I imagine he is incandescent.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

you should ask his son! more likely to get a response

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

On first blush, this seems to dramatically empower Levy. That'll cheer up a whole lot of people.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

yeah just a bit and no no it really wont.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

This is the kind of public perception the Porn Kings are up against:


> Shocking that one of the poorest boroughs in the country could be a bid partner with West Ham. They can find millions to help a football club out but can't find 200 thousand to keep the Atheron pool and leisure centre open. Robbin' Wales should get his priorities straight.


It's not entirely fair but it's how things look...


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

not our fault people dont take the time to read!

see people are trotting out the moving down the road from orient thing again. WE ARE ALLREADY DOWN THE ROAD. LOOK AT A MAP FOR FUCKS SAKE.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

It's Sullivan's son. Having read it again I think it might just be a way of re-organising it to avoid the legal stuff.

I like the 'anonymous complaint to the European commission alleging state aid'.  Wonder who that was? .  Spurs : The strung out of English football.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

I still don't understand why any of you here want the move? It's a comedy stadium - for football.... now with the track laid:


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

I'm not that bothered any more but it would have been interesting how they converted it.

Infrastructure is amazing natch.


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

tommers said:


> It's Sullivan's son. Having read it again I think it might just be a way of re-organising it to avoid the legal stuff.
> 
> I like the 'anonymous complaint to the European commission alleging state aid'. Wonder who that was? . Spurs : The strung out of English football.



To be fair, if it was spuds trying to move I'd be doing all I could to throw spanners in works, just for the shits and giggles.

The Daves should do it - by a square foot of land by WHL and keep kicking out objections.


----------



## Dr. Furface (Oct 11, 2011)

West Ham will still get the nod but the problems with their bid will still remain and no one will be happy with the outcome except maybe for the club owners and the Gov. But they'll never fill it and will have to give tix away to schoolkids - who probably won't bother showing up anyway!


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

and thus train a new generation of west ham fans! who would obviously have otherwise supported leyton. obviously.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

Cats and dogs living together.


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

They'll fill it with the sounds of children's laughter.

They may be laughing at, and not with, but laughter nonetheless.

Levy would have them sweeping chimneys.


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

He'd turn em into Soylent Green to feed to Ledley.


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

Maybe that's why he wants the stadium.

Jesus, is there no end to his evil?


----------



## Dr. Furface (Oct 11, 2011)

They should forget about football there and rip up the running track - but there's one sport it would be ideal for and that's SPEEDWAY! Start a new team there, it'll start a massive speedway revival, can't fail!


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

You'll like this:



> "By adding 'being rubbish at hanging on to a purpose built stadium handed to us on a plate' the time has come for us to push ineptly forward.



http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/sport...t-very-good-at-buildings-either-201110114408/


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

mattie said:


> Even without Brian, it surely couldn't be Freddie Sears, could it?



it will be faubert wont it? he is still at the club isnt he?


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

"Most effeminate chant in football" 

Me and the Daily Mash are going to have a falling out.


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

kained&able said:


> it will be faubert wont it? he is still at the club isnt he?


 
Yes, of course it will.


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

tommers said:


> "Most effeminate chant in football"
> 
> Me and the Daily Mash are going to have a falling out.



In the round, I suppose singing songs about men may be seen as slightly against the macho culture.


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

Songs about men?

It's about faded dreams, fortune always hiding, the eternal human struggle against cruel fate and the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

Unless you mean the thing about singing it to the youth team player.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

.. and the whole world laughs at you....


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> .. and the whole world laughs at you....



Is this the mysterious, previously lost to mankind hidden verse to 'bubbles'?


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

It's the updated, happening right now, 180 bpm, trending on Twitter version. Just ask Dave.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

greatest anthem in football. FACT.

only one that can compete is you'll never wal alone, but a few clubs sing that. ours is ours and ohh so bitter sweet.

dave


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

it is moving quick, rumour is gov will make an announcement at half 12.

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

I can imagine the OS filled with the singing of bubbles.

If they use it for the opening ceremony of 2012.  They should do, use some local colour.  And sing songs about Barry Hearn being an 'unpleasant gentleman'.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

I'm surprised Daniel Levy hasn't yet bought the rights to that toon, perhaps it'll be his next move.....


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> I'm surprised Daniel Levy hasn't yet bought the rights to that toon, perhaps it'll be his next move.....



He can have our stadium, he'll never take or bubbles.


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

kained&able said:


> it is moving quick, rumour is gov will make an announcement at half 12.
> 
> dave



Ooh.  Unusually quick.  Suspect decisions made before this 'bombshell'.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

apparently the stadium is going to be named dale farm now!


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

It's all a dreadful dogs breakfast really. I always thought that £1 billion offer from Welcome Trust for the whole park was intersting - subject to small print obv.


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 11, 2011)

what a strange occurrence.  i fully expect spurs fans to be the ones packing binoculars to go and watch their team in a couple of seasons.

*shrug*


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> what a strange occurrence. i fully expect spurs fans to be the ones packing binoculars to go and watch their team in a couple of seasons.
> 
> *shrug*



But, won't somebody think of the _children_.

The theatre of screams.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 11, 2011)

Levy wanted to demolish the existing ahletics stadium and start from scratch though.


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Levy wanted to demolish the existing ahletics stadium and start from scratch though.



He needs a big basement to boil all the children in.


----------



## marty21 (Oct 11, 2011)

a 3 way ground share - Hammers and Orient to have alternate Saturdays - Spurs to hold their home games on Tuesday afternoon at 3pm


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

Well apparently Orient have thrown their hat into the ring.  

Maybe if they'd done that the first time...


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

I wonder if Baz Hearn sees it as a suitable venue for snooker.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 11, 2011)

woah woah woah. orient would be violating section whatever of the fa code by moving close to a rival club shirley?

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

Certainly would Dave. And their average attendance is about 3,000 so that's a lot of free tickets to local children.


Maybe we should complain.


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 11, 2011)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/15244398.stm

plonker


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

Legend.

But also a plonker.


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

That's brilliant.


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 11, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Levy wanted to demolish the existing ahletics stadium and start from scratch though.



but only the owners of the stadium can do that.  now it's only available to be tenanted.  which is no good for anyone.


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

We're apparently going to go it 'alone', which I think means Newham will use the £40M to put a hit out on Levy.

Well, its one of the few venues fitting for Brian.


----------



## tommers (Oct 11, 2011)

I've read a few things.  One saying we told Newham we couldn't pay our part of the redevelopment.  One saying they dropped out of the process in a letter yesterday.  One from Boris saying "we will almost certainly lease it to West Ham".

I don't know what I think any more.  I'm really not sure about being a tenant.  How often is the lease up?


----------



## mattie (Oct 11, 2011)

tommers said:


> I've read a few things. One saying we told Newham we couldn't pay our part of the redevelopment. One saying they dropped out of the process in a letter yesterday. One from Boris saying "we will almost certainly lease it to West Ham".
> 
> I don't know what I think any more. I'm really not sure about being a tenant. How often is the lease up?



If there's one thing I'm certain, of, it's that Boris knows what's what.

I'm not sure I'd like to be a tenant.  I can see it being a political punchbag, at both government and mayoral level.


----------



## bluestreak (Oct 12, 2011)

being a tenant would be a nightmare.  and stupid.  cheaper, yes, but without any long-term security.

also, i just watched green street for the first time.  and, most definitely, the last.  christ on a fucking bike.


----------



## tommers (Oct 12, 2011)

That film is classic. I can't wait to show it to my son.

13 years to go!


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 12, 2011)

Moi:


> I still don't understand why any of you here want the move? It's a comedy stadium





tommers said:


> I'm not that bothered any more but it would have been interesting how they converted it.
> 
> Infrastructure is amazing natch.


Thang yew for the reply. The rest of the afflicted here seem a liittle shy....


----------



## tommers (Oct 12, 2011)

Well, I can't speak for the others but...

I think all of us don't want you lot there.

HTH.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 12, 2011)

It's heart warming.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 12, 2011)

see i always thought we were leasing it, it was just a 100 year lease or something.

and yeah greenstreet is proper pony.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 12, 2011)

I've given up on trying to understand it. Murkier than a le carre novel.


----------



## tommers (Oct 12, 2011)

Bentley's gone back to spurs.  Long term knee injury.

That went well.


----------



## mattie (Oct 12, 2011)

tommers said:


> Well, I can't speak for the others but...
> 
> I think all of us don't want you lot there.
> 
> HTH.



I'm just content that we're pissing off messers Levy and Hearn.

On top of that, I rarely go to UP as it's a ballache from Bath, Stratford would be doable.  When Bath aren't playing, of course.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 12, 2011)

tommers said:


> Bentley's gone back to spurs. Long term knee injury.
> 
> That went well.


good


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 13, 2011)

Caption comp time!!1!







Loved that strap on this morning luv, still a bit sore now: how much are we selling it for?


----------



## kained&able (Oct 13, 2011)

karen, its claret and BLUE not just purple.

lc hows your training ground coming along, you've been quite on that? has an indian burial ground been found or something?


----------



## tommers (Oct 13, 2011)

They've taken themselves to court over it.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 14, 2011)

kained&able said:


> lc hows your training ground coming along, you've been quite on that? has an indian burial ground been found or something?


I'm warmed by your interest, dave. The topping off ceremony of the 67 acre north London, state of the art, envied across the footballing world development was last month and they're beginning work on the interiors now, I believe. The relevant page on the official site keeps crashing my browser - which I hope isn't a metaphor for things to come - but here it is if you can make sense of it:

http://www.tottenhamhotspur.com/futu...e/gallery.html


----------



## tommers (Oct 14, 2011)

I had a dream last night that I was outside the Boleyn but it was loads bigger and had a massive megastore attached to it (probably the OS now I think about it) and Tevez pulled up in a car and got out with a load of advisers / flunkeys.  I was asking him if he was coming back but he said he was just going to buy some memorabilia for his kids.  (well, he gestured cos he can't speak English but I got the gist.)

And then I woke up.

Spooky.


----------



## mattie (Oct 14, 2011)

tommers said:


> I had a dream last night that I was outside the Boleyn but it was loads bigger and had a massive megastore attached to it (probably the OS now I think about it) and Tevez pulled up in a car and got out with a load of advisers / flunkeys. I was asking him if he was coming back but he said he was just going to buy some memorabilia for his kids. (well, he gestured cos he can't speak English but I got the gist.)
> 
> And then I woke up.
> 
> Spooky.



It's an omen.

http://www.football365.com/news/21554/7239194/Sam-Outside-Chance-WHam-Can-Get-Tevez

Mind you, BFS reckons he could be England manager so his optimism switch appears permanently set to 'spuds level of delusion'.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 15, 2011)

well that went well. good to see baldock getting off the mark.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 15, 2011)

2nd, and we play Southampton on Tuesday.  

Good stuff.


----------



## chieftain (Oct 15, 2011)

tommers said:


> 2nd, and we play Southampton on Tuesday.
> 
> Good stuff.



22nd


----------



## mattie (Oct 16, 2011)

chieftain said:


> 22nd



In all of England.  We rock.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 16, 2011)

It's hell though really, to be in it and to get out of it - 17th to 22nd: That's you that is.


----------



## tommers (Oct 16, 2011)

If you base everything on the past 2 seasons then I suppose so.


----------



## mattie (Oct 16, 2011)

Is there some rolling average L_C could give us?  I'm lost without pie charts.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 16, 2011)

If you can get a rolling average in a pie chart you're a better man than me. I'd settle for a sausage roll and a pie instead.


----------



## mattie (Oct 16, 2011)

Now you're speaking my language.


----------



## mattie (Oct 18, 2011)

Ooh.  We could got top tonight.

Sorry, 21st in new money.

I've caught a few snippets of Southampton on extended highlights, they look a quality passing team.  But they haven't got Brian.


----------



## tommers (Oct 18, 2011)

He said he's going back to 3 in midfield.

No mention of Brian. 

Should be good, proper game between 2 modern giants.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 18, 2011)

hope tomkins has recovered from his groin strain. other then that should be a very competitive and close game.

Be nice to win but its hardly to be expected or essential.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 18, 2011)

Brian's only in the fucking squad.


Fingers crossed!


----------



## tommers (Oct 18, 2011)

Boo! Didn't make the bench.

Almunia, Faubert, Reid, Faye, McCartney, Nolan, diop, lansbury,  Taylor, baldock, carew


----------



## mattie (Oct 18, 2011)

He'll be there in spirit.

And I don't mean in the 'faces' sense of the word.  Although he might be there later as well.


----------



## tommers (Oct 18, 2011)

Even game. Still second.


Knees jerking more than David Cameron watching predator over on kumb.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 18, 2011)

How tight is that top half .....


----------



## tommers (Oct 18, 2011)

'Citing innit?

Imagine a league where anybody can beat anybody else.

It's revolutionary.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 19, 2011)

You'll recall, of course, I did mention that to you several times last season as the guillotine loomed. If anyone wants evidence of the value _to supporters_ or relegation and promotion battles, the Championship - every season - is all they need.


----------



## Ponyutd (Oct 21, 2011)

El Hadji Diouf training at Wes tHam....say it aint so!


----------



## mattie (Oct 21, 2011)

I blame Barry Hearn.


----------



## Ponyutd (Oct 21, 2011)

He's going to have to up his spitting game if the move to the O.S. site happens. He'll never reach anyone!


----------



## mattie (Oct 21, 2011)

On KUMB:

http://kumb.com/story.php?id=125761

'Vile, racist filth spotted at Chadwell Heath'


----------



## kained&able (Oct 21, 2011)

it aint so. well it is, but its only to get him fit he isnt signing. i have been assured.

QPR or doncaster are the two sniffing.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 21, 2011)

Fuck off you vile little twat.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 21, 2011)

Well, dave's obv. a bit thick but he's not that bad ....


----------



## kained&able (Oct 21, 2011)

nah he wasnt talking about me, im a massive twat.

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 21, 2011)

kained&able said:


> it aint so. well it is, but its only to get him fit he isnt signing. i have been assured.
> 
> QPR or doncaster are the two sniffing.
> 
> dave



Barton and Diouf.  I'd be on Barton's side when it comes to the inevitable fisticuffs.


----------



## tommers (Oct 21, 2011)

Badoom tish.

I was going to clarify that but I thought it unnecessary.  


Oh and that was to lc  obviously.


----------



## mattie (Oct 22, 2011)

We're on the box on monday.

Wahay.  Sky Sports.  Just like old times.


----------



## tommers (Oct 22, 2011)

Oh sweet lord, I think they might actually do it.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 23, 2011)

Currently the 7th most successful London club - Millwall being 8th.

Just being helpful.


----------



## mattie (Oct 23, 2011)

Wrong thread, is all I can assume.


----------



## tommers (Oct 23, 2011)

It's nice to know that we might be 7th in London but we're still first for London Calling.

Oh stop it.  I know.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 23, 2011)

I can see the banners over entrances to the Olympic Park now 'Home to the 7th most successful club in London - 30% off Rabbit vibrators all week in the club shop'


----------



## tommers (Oct 23, 2011)

Leyton Orient will have done well.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 24, 2011)

the club shop? we have about 5 of em!

win.

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 24, 2011)

We should open one in Leyton.


----------



## mattie (Oct 24, 2011)

Anyone know the squad for tonight?

I think Brian would like the sea air.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 24, 2011)

*6.50pm - *West Ham United's team is confirmed - Almunia, O'Brien, McCartney, Faye, Reid, Diop, Noble, Nolan, Faubert, Collison, Carew. Substitutes are Boffin, Moncur, Sears, Piquionne and Baldock.

geroge moncur on the bench is interesting!

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 24, 2011)

He's here, he's there etc etc etc


----------



## tommers (Oct 24, 2011)

1-0. File that under gritty away win but we never looked like losing it. Good job.


----------



## mattie (Oct 24, 2011)

Yep.

Faubert worked his little socks off, quite a changearound.

Hope matey is OK, that twisted knee looked horrible.


----------



## tommers (Oct 24, 2011)

Was that what it was?  my blurry stream made me think it was his ankle.

I thought Sears changed it when he came on.


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 24, 2011)

Fat Sam does love a clean sheet.


----------



## starfish (Oct 24, 2011)

Brighton pushed you hard tonight, just lacked a cutting edge.


----------



## mattie (Oct 24, 2011)

tommers said:


> Was that what it was? my blurry stream made me think it was his ankle.
> 
> I thought Sears changed it when he came on.



Not quite sure, his leg looked a bit mangled, the poor sod.

Not really a game for Carew, sears looked like he could keep them a bit ore interested. I think we winged that a touch. In years past we'd have shipped 2 in 8 minutes of stoppage time.


----------



## hammerntongues (Oct 25, 2011)

It wasn`t pretty was it ? We would still be in the Prem if we defended like that. We shouldn`t be surprised I guess , Diop , Faye , Nolan all big hard tackling players , my problem is that should we get promotion , automatic or otherwise , I can`t see this lot staying in top flight for very long . Final third we totally lacked any threat , lets hope we see Baldock again Saturday.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 25, 2011)

diop is only on a one year deal as is faye, so i dont think they are even vaguely considered long term.

Nolan is on 5 years though which is worrying. Collison doesnt look like he will step up to take his place either, which is annoying.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 28, 2011)

The spitter isn't coming.

They saw sense.


----------



## Daniel (Oct 29, 2011)

Why did you break our boy?


----------



## tommers (Oct 29, 2011)

Which one?


----------



## kained&able (Oct 29, 2011)

bentley? suprised you'd notice.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 29, 2011)

I think he means lansbury.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 29, 2011)

oh noes whats happend to him?

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 29, 2011)

Out for 2 months or something.

Anyway another 3 points.  Sounds like it got a bit hairy towards the end.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 30, 2011)

baldock has really started to find his feet hasn't he! starting to look mint.

dave


----------



## tommers (Oct 30, 2011)

Yeah, what's he got now 4 in 3 starts?

Hopefully he'll play against Bristol on Tuesday.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 30, 2011)

certinly scored 4, not sure on appearances.

cant see him not starting on tuesday, no need to go 5 accross the midfield and well who else is there in contention really? piquione and thats about it until the god that is brian comes through a bit more.

dave


----------



## mattie (Oct 31, 2011)

Did I see John Carew crossing for Baldock to nod it in?

Surely that's a bit arse-about-face.


----------



## hammerntongues (Oct 31, 2011)

yes they link up well , hopefully he went off because he had a yellow . The 3-2 was a bit flattering for them , we looked far the better side for most of the game and even played a bit of old style west ham football , it didn`t work but we played it ! I`m sure BS will start with Carew and Baldock tmrw , We still don`t seem to be right on top of our game yet , I hope Baldock turns out to be the real deal or we will be stuck with hoofball for the season , best way to avoid that is for him to keep scoring.


----------



## tommers (Oct 31, 2011)

They said they took Carew off cos they were worried about a red.

I'm going tomorrow so I hope to see more of this mythical passing football.


----------



## mattie (Oct 31, 2011)

Well, we might see him at UP, but only for one game:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/15521985.stm


----------



## tommers (Oct 31, 2011)

Phew.

Nailed on to score though.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 31, 2011)

dont think we will be stuck with hoof ball, but with a few injuries we are lacking a little in midfield!

oh marek stech our young czech keeper saved a pen for yeovil over the weekend by the way. seems to be earning decent reviews down in league 1.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Oct 31, 2011)

Yeovil are bottom of the league and he's the keeper. I'd hate to read a bad review.


----------



## kained&able (Oct 31, 2011)

hes only been there 4 games


----------



## kained&able (Nov 1, 2011)

sears is shit


----------



## mattie (Nov 1, 2011)

you watching the game, dave?

Or just a general observation?


----------



## kained&able (Nov 1, 2011)

listening to it on radio.(well west ham site)

he is shit. i demand brian!


----------



## mattie (Nov 1, 2011)

I'm not sure he's in the squad.

BFS saving him for our Wembley final, obviously.


----------



## kained&able (Nov 1, 2011)

he isnt in the squad, he should be though. cos sears is shit.

hall isnt going to get on the pitch either just about to use our third sub.

dave


----------



## tommers (Nov 1, 2011)

Well it was free so I can't complain.

Thought we played alright first half but as soon as he took baldock off and put Cole we all know what was coming.   And it didn't work.

We dominated the match though.  James made a couple of decent saves.

And I thought Sears was good Dave.  He faded a bit second half, but he was the only one running at them.


----------



## hammerntongues (Nov 2, 2011)

I thought we played OK something like 65 pct of posession , when I saw the line-up I was pleased . Piq , Baldock Sears and Noble , that was pretty positive . We hit the post and had few very good chances . Obviously the result was disappointing but still got 7 out of last 9 points available and  some fans are bitching. I was surprised at the Baldock sub , maybe injured ? thought Piq should have come off or even Sears .


----------



## kained&able (Nov 2, 2011)

from the commentary it was more like running at them, stopping, cutting in thus losing all impetus and then putting in a shit cross.

baldock took an elbow in the eye in the first half so might have been taken off because of that.

Not really complaining but chucking on diop didn't really make sense to me, although we have been leaking late goals so maybe sam though one point was better then none.

Would have liked to see hall on for either sears or piquone though.

How did reids injury look?

All that being said its november, we are shit in november. always.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Nov 2, 2011)

very difficult to tell about Reid , from memory we were defending a corner ? so maybe he came down awkwardly . He was stretchered off so doesnt look good.
We did lack a bit of imagination in the final third but to be fair to Faubert he put in a few decent crossed  , McCartney was worse . Faye looked very good again and I would have given him MOTM . Nolan was , well Nolan really a few hard tackles but he was caught on the ball a few times himself .


----------



## tommers (Nov 2, 2011)

Reid has dislocated his shoulder.  Out for 6 weeks.

I agree with hammerntongues about everything else.  I can see why people get on Nolan's back, but I think some of them are just waiting for him to mess it up.  He did lots of good stuff but also got caught on the ball a couple of times (cue "fucking nolan, sort it out!" from the blokes behind me.)

Bristol City defended well but some of the subs were a bit weird.  Maybe he felt that Baldock had to come off (and he didn't do much that I remember) but when we then had Cole and Piq up front we just started lumping balls up to them.   We looked a lot better when we passed it about a bit.


----------



## mattie (Nov 2, 2011)

I must admit to being a touch unimpressed with Nolan whenever I've seen him play for us, but there seems to be a touch of over-reaction in places.

How did Noble get on, btw?


----------



## mattie (Nov 2, 2011)

Just watching Champions' League highlights - is it a bit juvenile to still enjoy watching Lumpalard missing open goals?


----------



## kained&able (Nov 3, 2011)

if it is may we never grow up!

Noble was the best player on the pitch for us from the radio commentary and various journo reviews.

dave


----------



## tommers (Nov 4, 2011)

Yeah, by a long way.

Faye was also absolutely immense (in all senses of the word.)


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2011)

Brady, in her Sun column, and Gold, on Twitter, have both said that there would be some form of retractable seating at the OS if we became tenants there.

Hate to say I told you so... but...


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 12, 2011)

'retractable' as in wheeled around a bit. All at ground level as well, of course.

It's surely the worst of all worlds.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2011)

There's going to be free ice cream too.


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 12, 2011)

Yeah, and don't forget to take a brolley and wind break out there.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2011)

Extended roof.

Next?


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 12, 2011)

Why not go for the full retractable roof with air con. I'm sure the Porn Kings are tendering for quotes even now.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2011)

Like that one in Dubai?

Yeah.  That could work.


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 12, 2011)

tbf, it is going to be hilarious. Lots of short fat men wearing shirts a size too small, sitting on a running track in the pouring rain, dodging to get a view between the heads in front, for £50.

It was never like this in Green Street.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2011)

Your glass is always half empty.


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 12, 2011)

vs. Burnley.


----------



## tommers (Nov 12, 2011)

That was quite funny.


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 12, 2011)

Thang yew: I've still got it.... and it's goodnight from me >>


----------



## kained&able (Nov 15, 2011)

stech has been recalled from his loan at yeovil. Anyone know if green is injured again or they just intend to send the only just back to training krucz(or however its spelled) out on loan to get some fitness back??

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 15, 2011)

tommers said:


> Brady, in her Sun column, and Gold, on Twitter, have both said that there would be some form of retractable seating at the OS if we became tenants there.


Sorted - although you wouldn't know it, the Porn Kings are just out of shot:

http://soccer.epicsports.com/prod/15775/index.html


----------



## kained&able (Nov 18, 2011)

Qpr are after james tomkins apparently. i have every confidence we will tell them to fuck the fuck off. 3millon lol.

Francesco pavon es real madrid is currenly training with us. Could be great cover if he still owns legs.

spurs are naughty! http://www.teamtalk.com/west-ham-united/7313696/New-arrest-in-stadium-fraud-probe

dave


----------



## kained&able (Nov 21, 2011)

anothered decent win, scrappy as hell and the goal were ridiculous but we are starting to distance ourselves from boro/cardiff now which is a good thing.

dave


----------



## London_Calling (Nov 21, 2011)

Went behind, made subs, changed things around and won. Hoofing aside, it bodes well. The bigger problem comes next season.


----------



## mattie (Nov 22, 2011)

I may be going to the Barnsley game - options too for the Burnley game but Bath vs Sale takes precedence.

My first trip for almost two seasons.

Apologies for the inevitable jinxing.


----------



## mattie (Nov 22, 2011)

London_Calling said:


> Went behind, made subs, changed things around and won. Hoofing aside, it bodes well. The bigger problem comes next season.



Yeah, we'll be lost when BFS becomes England manager.

So will England.


----------



## kained&able (Nov 22, 2011)

matty taylor, guy demal and off course brian montenegro are playing in the dev squad game at ipswich this lunch time.

dave


----------



## mattie (Nov 22, 2011)

Brian set up Sears.

Still saving that hat-trick for the FA Cup final, I see.


----------



## bluestreak (Nov 23, 2011)

i'm boycotting west ham until brian gets in the first team.


----------



## mattie (Nov 23, 2011)

bluestreak said:


> i'm boycotting west ham until brian gets in the first team.



Good plan.  We should all get tickets for the development squad, bound to be cheap and we could probably sneak a few tinnies in.  And we'd see Brian dance.


----------



## bluestreak (Nov 23, 2011)

yeah, i like that idea.


----------



## tommers (Nov 26, 2011)

what a goal from nolan.


----------



## kained&able (Nov 27, 2011)

yeah great finish.


----------



## kained&able (Nov 29, 2011)

dont want to alarm any one but as things stand we are top of the league


----------



## kained&able (Nov 29, 2011)

or not


----------



## tommers (Nov 29, 2011)

Don't count your chickens Dave.


----------



## kained&able (Nov 29, 2011)

but then hyow do i know how many i am going to have? and its not like we are playing the foxes.


----------



## Ponyutd (Nov 29, 2011)

Count them now.


----------



## tommers (Nov 29, 2011)

Six points clear of the playoffs, and putting together a bit of a run.

Not bad at all.


----------



## kained&able (Nov 29, 2011)

i was nervous as hell about that(apart from anything else i love with a boro fan) great result.


----------



## Ponyutd (Nov 29, 2011)

I love with someone who hates football


----------



## tommers (Nov 30, 2011)

My wife is a Boro fan.

Luckily she doesn't really care any more.  Her brother is a steward at the Riverside though so I'll have to be careful when we go up there.

First time this season they've lost at home.


----------



## hammerntongues (Nov 30, 2011)

I think Cole is now 49 for 125 starts , not bad stats for someone who generally gets so little praise , great result , shit ,  we will be singing BF Sams Claret and Blue army on Saturday at this rate.


----------



## tommers (Nov 30, 2011)

I've always said he's what we need.  Apparently we even played some nice stuff last night.  Blimey.


----------



## kained&able (Nov 30, 2011)

just need him to stop doing quite such a good impression of a donkey on occasion.

dave


----------



## tommers (Nov 30, 2011)

I meant bfs.  I used to hate Carlton but I've warmed to the big galoot.


----------



## Ponyutd (Nov 30, 2011)

The way things are going Chels*a will be in for Sam.


----------



## kained&able (Dec 1, 2011)

cole is a decent enough striker but just isnt good enough to be first choice relied upon striker in the prem.

He is more then welcome to stay and be second/third choice next year if we go up but main man, nah.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Dec 1, 2011)

On his tod I would agree but some strikers just need a good pairing , Quinn /Phillips , Cottee / Macca , maybe just maybe Cole / Baldock , there is a long long wait to go before it will be proven but I would say its a possibilty at least.


----------



## kained&able (Dec 6, 2011)

we've just signed some 17 year old non league player.

http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11685/7355448/

dave


----------



## tommers (Dec 6, 2011)

Yeah I saw that.

Poor result on Saturday.  Sounded like we were all over them though.  Smash & grab.


----------



## kained&able (Dec 6, 2011)

after 7 undefeated one cannot complain and it least it wasn't hines or stanislas that scored.

dave


----------



## tommers (Dec 6, 2011)

Yes.  That is true.  Just bad luck really.

Who's next?  Reading or somebody isn't it?


----------



## kained&able (Dec 6, 2011)

yeah reading away.


----------



## tommers (Dec 6, 2011)

Without Mattie and RD it just ain't the same is it?


----------



## kained&able (Dec 7, 2011)

no


----------



## bluestreak (Dec 17, 2011)

brian was on the bench today.  if he'd played we'dhave won 6-0.


----------



## tommers (Dec 17, 2011)

Was he? Brilliant. I can't wait till he plays. 

We have a new mascot. Hammerhead. Look him up, I'd link but I'm on my phone. He's a bit


----------



## kained&able (Dec 17, 2011)

yeah dont approve of him.

by the sounds of it daniel potts(son of steve) had a sterling debut.

Good to get three points against a team in such good form, especially since we had to play lansbury in the back four by the end of it.

dave


----------



## tommers (Dec 17, 2011)

Yeah, Linda at Centre Back, Lansbury at Right Back, Cole as a winger...


----------



## hammerntongues (Dec 19, 2011)

Danny Potts should have got MoM , great debut , there were groans around the whole stadium when it was given to Nolan . we are  still lacking ideas in front of goal , Cole played well but if we are going to keep the Sam haters at bay we need Baldock back , it wasnt great to look at but now have a real good chance of being top by new year . We started with Cole , Piq and Carew which tells you everything .


----------



## hammerntongues (Dec 21, 2011)

hammerntongues said:


> Danny Potts should have got MoM , great debut , there were groans around the whole stadium when it was given to Nolan . we are still lacking ideas in front of goal , Cole played well but if we are going to keep the Sam haters at bay we need Baldock back , it wasnt great to look at but now have a real good chance of being top by new year . We started with Cole , Piq and Carew which tells you everything .



From KUMB............made me smile

*Kevin Nolan - MOTM*



by *Faliraki Hammer* on Mon Dec 19, 2011 4:45 pm
Just received this from a Spud mate (he's actually ok for one of them!). Make of it what you will, just thought I'd share..

Hi mate,

Hope all well with you. Funny story for you. Were you at west ham game on Sat when your loyal fans booed Kevin Nolan when he was announced man of match?

My mate who has box at spammers had a couple of guests (dubious characters) who were match sponsors. Kevin Nolan was in my mate’s box before game introducing himself as club captain to the match sponsors etc. Cutting a long story short he offered match sponsor 2 west ham tops signed by the team if he would be selected as man of the match (which is selected by the match sponsor) as he had a bet with a number of the players he was going to be MoM.

My dad was in the box and said he was in stitches when Nolan was announced MoM and all the West Ham fans booed!

He took the 2 signed tops up to my mate’s box after the game and said he made a fortune from the other players!!

How funny is that?


----------



## tommers (Dec 21, 2011)

That sounds about right. Brilliant stuff, I like it.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 4, 2012)

I right bloody mess over Christmas results but joint top and an improved GD ?  it could have been a lot worse , away point at Brum is Ok , a fuck up and 2 early goals at Derby was too much to come back from and a 1 goal victory over bottom club Coventry , in fact we were way better than  the 1 goal suggests and Nolan does what is needed  . Its getting really bunched up at the top of the Championship but I genuinely believe that if we can get our noses in front we can stay there for the rest of the season .

biggest plus for me was Nouble who looks good , certainly good enough to replace Piq , a goal against Derby will have helped his confidence , he only played 20 mins on Monday but lit up the place , pacey and strong .


----------



## tommers (Jan 4, 2012)

I agree with that I think.  Southampton seem to be imploding.  We didn't have a great December but all that's happened is it's allowed Cardiff and Boro to catch up with us.  After them it's 6 points to 5th.  So yeah, if we can get ahead of the pack then I reckon we can stay there too.

Horrible injuries / suspensions as well... let's hope that improves now for the run in.


----------



## kained&able (Jan 6, 2012)

tis all very close


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 6, 2012)

Just reading KUMB seems we sold 3500 for this weekend , not bad for a Cup game on Sunday in January . I Would love a decent cup run again this year , somehow the atmosphere is still lacking a bit at UP for league games , not sure if it is to do with the football or just that unusually for us we are expecting to win every game and the crowd dont get up for it .   Millwall game may well be a little different .


----------



## kained&able (Jan 6, 2012)

reckon we will field a very weak team to be honest.

Gary o'neil, lansbuty(for fitness not cos they are shit) nouble, carew stech and lots of of yoots.

I couldnt give a flying fuck about the cup this year, i just dont want people to get injured!

dave


----------



## tommers (Jan 14, 2012)

Good win today. Joint top but, more importantly, 4 pts clear of 3rd again.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 23, 2012)

Another 3 points , that`s all that can be said about it .......... ( no actually Rob Hall looked very exciting for the last 12 minutes )


----------



## kained&able (Jan 23, 2012)

ohh hall came on? Didn't notice that, yay!

In shocking news i might even get to a game either next month or next!

I have now seen walsall more times then west ham  jimmy walker broke their games played record, I like jimmy walker.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 24, 2012)

Rob Hall wanted the ball every opportunity and injected some  pace , it was good to see a player taking on defenders , not always successful but a real effort , even Baldock seems to be lacking in that area .

Millwall coming up ? would be a good time to take a visit to UP . games are lacking a bit of atmosphere at the moment but that game is guaranteed to be heated

3 points clear and top for the first time this season .


----------



## tommers (Jan 24, 2012)

Did Southampton lose last night?


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 24, 2012)

tommers said:


> Did Southampton lose last night?



0 - 2 yep


----------



## kained&able (Jan 24, 2012)

YES WE CAN(win the league and not go bust)


----------



## tommers (Jan 24, 2012)

Excellent stuff.  It's not pretty but it's effective.


----------



## tommers (Jan 30, 2012)

http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11095/7465304/

Bit of a weird one.  Why's he leaving?


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 30, 2012)

tommers said:


> http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11095/7465304/
> 
> Bit of a weird one. Why's he leaving?



According to a report on KUMB he couldnt settle in Italy .( lets see how he settles in Newham ) Only a loan so no too much of a risk .


----------



## tommers (Jan 30, 2012)

Maybe that's Genoa's plan.


----------



## kained&able (Jan 30, 2012)

theres been big big rumours about tevez joining us on loan for the lol.

dave


----------



## tommers (Jan 30, 2012)

Little Jack Sullivan has spilled the beans again.

Prem attacking midfielder.
Champ top scorer
+ Brazilian striker all signing tomorrow.

I reckon... Ravel Morrison, vaz te + ze Eduardo.

Morrison would be a roller coaster.


----------



## tommers (Jan 30, 2012)

Or fat Frank's coming home.


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## kained&able (Jan 31, 2012)

its morrison! http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/jan/21/ravel-morrison-manchester-united umm master stroke or marco boogers?

champ top scorer is lambert. So ummmm Maybe he means league one and rhodes?

fat wanks home is the bottom of the sea,

and yeah ze eduardo was having a medical today according to fat bossman at a press conference.

dave


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

Vaz te has scored ten.  There's no way Lambert is getting sold.

If Morrison is true then it's a massive gamble.  He sounds like he's a bit stupid.   Bfs is mates with sir Alex though so maybe he thinks he can sort him out.  Not had a proper Nutter / genius since PDC. And at least he would play here.

Should be a funny day anyway.


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 31, 2012)

BFS is every bit as disciplined as the Fergy  and Morrison at Man Utd wouldn`t have had the likes of Nolan , Diop , Faye to put a gentle arm around his shoulders to keep him in line . Its really not too early to be thinking Prem football and if we are to survive then all our new signings should be with a view to playing top level football , we will be losing Lansbury back to the Gooners , we definitely need a goalscoring MF player .


----------



## kained&able (Jan 31, 2012)

from my understanding we are paying them 1million. Depending on wages it doesn't sound like a massive gamble. I think our youth set up will help him a bit as well. We are very used to having kids about the place and i can't remember any of them coming off the rails(unlike sharpe and giggs etc.) That's left to ginger aussies at xmas parties, chilliean centre backs and gypsy dutch.

Lansbury is end of the season isn't he? He isn't back to the gunners yet??

dave


----------



## kained&able (Jan 31, 2012)

we might be signing nicky maynard now!


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 31, 2012)

yeh Lansbury at the end of the season , we haven`t had an anti-hero for a while , Morrison would fit the bill . Piq and Carew must be feeling unloved , I really wanted Cole to start banging them in and he has had the chance this season sadly .


----------



## kained&able (Jan 31, 2012)

piq and carew are the big man though. its the number 10 tricky wingers and creative mids we are lacking.

all of the people make sense thus far although vaz te is pony and im not convinced maynard could cut it in the prem

dave


----------



## Barking_Mad (Jan 31, 2012)

Vaz Te has been superb for my team Barnsley this year. Keep in mind that those 10 goals came from him playing as a winger. Not sure what the fee was. Ive heard 1.5m with clauses and add ons, but this seems a bit much to me..


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 31, 2012)

From KUMB ...............

So as far as front men go we could have

1. Carlton Cole
2. Ze Eduardo
3. Sam Baldock
4. Nicky Maynard
5. Ricardo Vaz Te
6. Robert Hall
7. Frank Nouble
8. Freddie Sears
9. John Carew
10. Freddie Piquionne
11. Brian Montenegro
12. Dylan Tombides

12 strikers on one teams first team squad


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

Barking_Mad said:


> Vaz Te has been superb for my team Barnsley this year. Keep in mind that those 10 goals came from him playing as a winger. Not sure what the fee was. Ive heard 1.5m with clauses and add ons, but this seems a bit much to me..



£750k, is the word on KUMB.  Although that might just be the initial payment...

I've re-read my post on Morrison and it came across a bit negative... if he can sort himself out then it sounds like he'll be a great signing. Brilliant player, by all accounts.

Maybe your right, maybe we should just graft diop and faye to him to make sure he doesn't get in any trouble.


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

C+P from Twitter

@TheBig_Sam
notBigSam
Excited about working with young Ravel Morrison, but he comes with a list of "dead important" instructions. He's like a f***ing Gremlin.

@TheBig_Sam
notBigSam
The first three? Don't let him near fireworks; Don't let him drink rum; Don't let him carry a sword. f***ing hell.


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

@TheBig_Sam
notBigSam
He also seems to have a fake passport on him at all times.  The name on it is Mavel Rorrison.  This boy is gonna need a lot of work.


----------



## kained&able (Jan 31, 2012)

I love big fat sam. best thing on twitter!


----------



## kained&able (Jan 31, 2012)

we have released jordon brown who looks likely to go to crewe.

Olly lee is on trial at gillingham and wont be afford a new contract in the summer by us.

dave


----------



## hammerntongues (Jan 31, 2012)

None of these signings will be available for tonight but will be very interesting on Saturday , probably start without any of the newbies I guess , with Taylor and Demel both fit again , I wonder who we will see first .


----------



## kained&able (Jan 31, 2012)

you'd have thought maynard/vaz te would be the ones most likely to get some minutes.

Match fit and used to the championship.

dave


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

Morrison and vaz te signed.  Get in.

3-1 down to Ipswich at half time. Do not get in.


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

Wow.  Bad day at the office.


----------



## Maggot (Jan 31, 2012)

Ouch!


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

Just a blip.  Honest.


----------



## Lo Siento. (Jan 31, 2012)

blimey, we like playing your lot, don't we?


----------



## tommers (Jan 31, 2012)

It's good to also have bogey teams in the championship.

The only positive I can see is that it makes it easy for sam to drop them all.

Maynard's signed too.

My predictions came true!  First time ever!  Looking forward to seeing Morrison - we've finally got an exciting player to watch.








More of this please.


----------



## London_Calling (Feb 1, 2012)

Evening chaps! Thought I'd drop in a say 'hi, see how things are going with Top Shelf Sham; everything tickety-boo?


----------



## souljacker (Feb 1, 2012)

Hahahahahaha!


----------



## tommers (Feb 1, 2012)

Fucking hell. Look what's come out of the woodwork!


----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 1, 2012)

souljacker said:


> Hahahahahaha!



Sahahahahahah................... ???


----------



## souljacker (Feb 1, 2012)

tommers said:


> Fucking hell. Look what's come out of the woodwork!



Lol! We haven't had much to cheer about this season so I intend to enjoy it while I can. I've got quite a few mates who are hammers so it's nice to have something to gloat about.


----------



## souljacker (Feb 1, 2012)

hammerntongues said:


> Sahahahahahah................... ???



Choprahahahahahaha!


----------



## tommers (Feb 1, 2012)

souljacker said:


> Lol! We haven't had much to cheer about this season so I intend to enjoy it while I can. I've got quite a few mates who are hammers so it's nice to have something to gloat about.



I wasn't talking about you! . Gloating about a game your team actually played in is expected...


----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 2, 2012)

Its all Ok , Sam just sent me an email saying sorry .................


----------



## kained&able (Feb 2, 2012)

If morrison is a as good as i am led to belive he is i reckon collison will be gone at the end of the season.

oh well.

so then new starting 11 is.......

Green

Linda
Tomkins
Reid/Faye
O'Brian

Vaz te/taylor
Morrison
Noble
Faubert

Cole
Baldock/maynard

or add diop to the middle and get rid of the second striker and play morrison or vaz te a bit further forward and go 4-5-1.

That's not bad that is.

dave


----------



## tommers (Feb 2, 2012)

Um.... where's our glorious captain?


----------



## kained&able (Feb 2, 2012)

ahh...... okay nolan alongside noble, morrison off the bench for now i guess.

has sears been made into glue yet(or loaned to some league one club)


----------



## tommers (Feb 2, 2012)

I think he'll play Morrison as a second striker.  Number 10.  Trequartista.  Attacking midfielder.  In the hole.

You know.  One of them.

Teddy Sheringham.


----------



## kained&able (Feb 2, 2012)




----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 3, 2012)

Should have been going into this match  full of confidence but after Tuesdays fuck up its going to be a tense one . I want to see Morrison on the pitch even if just for 20 mins or so , I am not really too worried about the Cole / Baldock partnership , I think that can work and Maynard can only improve the situation up-front , for me its midfield where we lack any inspiration and more importantly pace .We have been one dimensional and slow .


----------



## tommers (Feb 3, 2012)

Yeah, I agree with all of that.  BFS needs to sort it out there. Nolan, Noble, Collison, Lansbury, Diop... it's all a bit plodding.  Hopefully Vaz Te and Morrison will change that.

I don't think Morrison will be playing this weekend, maybe as a sub.

I reckon it will be  Green, Tomkins, Faye, Linda, O'Brien, Nolan, Noble, Collison, Vaz Te, Taylor, Cole.

Let's hope that 5-1 was a blip.  A big old blip.


----------



## kained&able (Feb 3, 2012)

home i want us to be playing two up top. Drop collison and chuck in baldock/maynard and that is about right. Is vaz te a left or right winger?? If he is right i want faubert at rb to provide some decent crosses. O'brian lacks a bit of pace.

Also, i would disagree about lansbury being a plodder, boy looks to have some skill, he has been huegly missed while out injured.

dave


----------



## tommers (Feb 3, 2012)

Do you think?  I think he has done precisely nothing.  I hate him.  There.  I've finally said it.

I think Vaz Te is a right winger, but I'm not sure.

I never want to see Faubert at right back ever again.  I thought we decided this at the end of last season?


----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 3, 2012)

kained&able said:


> home i want us to be playing two up top. Drop collison and chuck in baldock/maynard and that is about right. Is vaz te a left or right winger?? If he is right i want faubert at rb to provide some decent crosses. O'brian lacks a bit of pace.
> 
> Also, i would disagree about lansbury being a plodder, boy looks to have some skill, he has been huegly missed while out injured.
> 
> dave


 
Vaz Te played left against us earlier in the season and was always a a threat  but I think he can play either flank , with Lansbury  I just cant get too excited about a player who will not be with us next season , rather play someone into the role . He did look good the first couple of games tho I would have to agree.


----------



## kained&able (Feb 3, 2012)

yeah, i can't get overlly excited but he does a very good job and morrsion is going to take a while to bed in you'd assume.

dave


----------



## tommers (Feb 3, 2012)

Yeah, I think there are a few games coming up when I'm going to be cursing BFS for not bringing Morrison on.  I am proper excited.


----------



## tommers (Feb 4, 2012)

Hahahahaha!  We beat you with 10 men! 

Reid   "A sense of gross injustice."  
Nolan 

Pressure's on Cardiff and Southampton now....


----------



## tommers (Feb 4, 2012)

and Cardiff can't handle it!

nice draw for brum and southampton next please...


----------



## tommers (Feb 4, 2012)

Perfect day's football that.


----------



## hammerntongues (Feb 6, 2012)

The best game at UP for a long while , Cole was great up front on his own and Faubert had his best game in claret and blue , Noble totally dominated midfield . It was very strange to see Tompkins playing in midfield though , I wonder if this was a stop gap or something he BFS is experimenting with , playing in front of a back four in the Diop role , I would like to see it again before making a decision .

A genuinely entertaining 90 mins where we played some very neat football and with Nolan on the bench for three we will get to see how we set up without him .

having said that Millwall were shit .


----------



## Sweet FA (Feb 6, 2012)

Agree with all the above; 1st time I've been for a while and, bar having to nip out at West Ham for a couple of cans of hastily guzzled Stella from Costcutters, a very satisfactory day all round. Some shocking decisions though. Won £40 on the score too


----------



## tommers (Feb 8, 2012)

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20120208/west-ham-united-statement_2236884_2604105

Well, that didn't take long!  I follow him on Twitter (sue me) and didn't see anything.  He must have deleted it.


----------



## tommers (Feb 8, 2012)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/feb/08/west-ham-ravel-morrison-homophobic-twitter

Ah, somebody called him a crack head, so he called them a faggot.

Great stuff.


----------



## Sweet FA (Feb 13, 2012)

Won't bother with a pint then.


----------



## stethoscope (Feb 13, 2012)

Yeah noticed the boarding up of the Boleyn pre-Millwall!


----------



## 5t3IIa (Feb 14, 2012)

It's open. I assumed they board it pre-emptively, iyswim. 

Who are you people playing tonight? I am advised to avoid the tube station from 8.20pm


----------



## tommers (Feb 14, 2012)

Southampton. Nothing special to worry about, just a normal match (well it's a top of the table 6 pointer but it'll be a normal crowd.)  Expect a Valentine's Day vibe. 

Have you strolled down Green Street on a match night? I really like it but I can see it might not be your thing.

Wait a minute... from 8.20?  That's halfway through the first half!  It'll be busy with people arriving from about 6 I guess and then it'll be really busy with people leaving from about half nine.


----------



## 5t3IIa (Feb 14, 2012)

tommers said:


> Southampton. Nothing special to worry about, just a normal match (well it's a top of the table 6 pointer but it'll be a normal crowd.) Expect a Valentine's Day vibe.
> 
> Have you strolled down Green Street on a match night? I really like it but I can see it might not be your thing.
> 
> Wait a minute... from 8.20? That's halfway through the first half! It'll be busy with people arriving from about 6 I guess and then it'll be really busy with people leaving from about half nine.


 

Valentine's Day vibe? Actual lol  Oh, and I meant 1820!

I did think I'd have a look at what the whole thing actually entails. Hundreds of blokes filing down the street I expect. Masses of humanity in a happy state sound nice


----------



## tommers (Feb 14, 2012)

Yeah. The club were actually trying to sell it as somewhere to take your other half on Valentine's Day.






But yeah, there'll be a good atmosphere, at least beforehand. 

My Dad's going.  Not sure what his wife thinks of it.  He offered me a ticket but I explained how things work to him.  Maybe he'll take her.


----------



## 5t3IIa (Feb 14, 2012)

That looks more like "Face it, son. You love West Ham more than your missus. See you at kick-off"


----------



## tommers (Feb 14, 2012)

There was one about "giving her a night to remember" (or something) but they've changed it.

Oh yeah, it'll be a night to remember alright.  "you can open your eyes now darling"


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## 5t3IIa (Feb 14, 2012)

"I don't think they have candles, sorry"


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## Libertad (Feb 14, 2012)

You should go to a game 5t3lla, night matches at the Boleyn are something else, you'll be hooked.


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## 5t3IIa (Feb 14, 2012)

Libertad said:


> You should go to a game 5t3lla, night matches at the Boleyn are something else, you'll be hooked.


 
Thirty two knicker?!


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## Libertad (Feb 14, 2012)

5t3IIa said:


> Thirty two knicker?!


 
Wear what you like.


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## 5t3IIa (Feb 14, 2012)

Libertad said:


> Wear what you like.


 
arf


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## 5t3IIa (Feb 14, 2012)




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## tommers (Feb 14, 2012)

15 stone of prime british beef.


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## tommers (Feb 14, 2012)

1-1.  That'll do fine after Taylor got himself sent off.

Did Cole really get booked for letting the keeper slap him?


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## Balbi (Feb 15, 2012)

What did matty do? Ah, violence. He really, really doesn't like Southampton. Good lad.


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## Deareg (Feb 15, 2012)

Ravel Morrison has been charged by the FA over something he said on Twitter, not reported what he said though.


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## 5t3IIa (Feb 15, 2012)

Deareg said:


> Ravel Morrison has been charged by the FA over something he said on Twitter, not reported what he said though.


 
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/feb/08/west-ham-ravel-morrison-homophobic-twitter

His message will not win any punctuation prizes but it conveyed plenty of menace and has given him his place in the pantheon of players to have sparked Twitter storms. "Crack head?" he wrote. "Go suck out u little faggot your a guy that talks if u see me you try slap me I'm in manchester every week." The tweet was later deleted.


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## Deareg (Feb 15, 2012)

5t3IIa said:


> http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/feb/08/west-ham-ravel-morrison-homophobic-twitter
> 
> His message will not win any punctuation prizes but it conveyed plenty of menace and has given him his place in the pantheon of players to have sparked Twitter storms. "Crack head?" he wrote. "Go suck out u little faggot your a guy that talks if u see me you try slap me I'm in manchester every week." The tweet was later deleted.


You can take the boy out of Wythenshawe.........


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## chieftain (Feb 21, 2012)

Classy, your best player all season and this is the thanks he gets: http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/2897...-owner-david-sullivan-accuses-scott-parker-of


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## hammerntongues (Feb 21, 2012)

chieftain said:


> Classy, your best player all season and this is the thanks he gets: http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/2897...-owner-david-sullivan-accuses-scott-parker-of


 
Don`t be an arse , he wasn`t criticising Parker , what he saw is what we all saw , Parker did protect himself and too right in his situation , not one fan begrudged Parker his move ( we might have preferred it wasnt Spurs ) He would be given a standing ovation if he returned to UP .


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## tommers (Feb 21, 2012)

chieftain said:


> Classy, your best player all season and this is the thanks he gets: http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/2897...-owner-david-sullivan-accuses-scott-parker-of


 

  Great stuff chief.

Read the whole interview.  He also says the move was about football not money and that he deserved the move.  There's nothing in there to say he acted badly - there's just an understanding of where Parker's priorities were at the time.


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## chieftain (Feb 21, 2012)

hammerntongues said:


> Don`t be an arse , he wasn`t criticising Parker , what he saw is what we all saw , Parker did protect himself and too right in his situation , not one fan begrudged Parker his move ( we might have preferred it wasnt Spurs ) He would be given a standing ovation if he returned to UP .



Fair do's, if you keep playing well in the fizzy pop league you might be able to give him his ovation next season


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## chieftain (Feb 21, 2012)

tommers said:


> Great stuff chief.
> 
> Read the whole interview.  He also says the move was about football not money and that he deserved the move.  There's nothing in there to say he acted badly - there's just an understanding of where Parker's priorities were at the time.



You are right and I did indeed speed read that article without giving it the attention it deserves. As my pennance I will NOT take the piss out of Jason the Hammer for a full hour of Friday evenings drink up


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## tommers (Feb 21, 2012)

can I just say that this is the funniest game ever?


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## tommers (Feb 21, 2012)

Down to ten men for 35 mins, away at a promotion rival.  Lansbury in goal cos "he played there at school" and we win 4-1.  Unbelievable.

What a great game.


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## tommers (Feb 21, 2012)

Oh and 7 points from 3 games where we've been down to 10 men for about 70% of the time - against Millwall, Southampton and Blackpool.

We rock.


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## hammerntongues (Mar 7, 2012)

2 weeks and no posts ! Where`s kained ? 

Big game tonight , well they all are now , Southampton fucked up with a draw , if all goes the way it should , then top tonight with a game in hand . Reading getting a bit close for comfort though .


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## tommers (Mar 7, 2012)

I think Dave has gone mate.  Mattie's left.. so it's pretty much just me and you.

Like you say, big game tonight.  I've just checked our fixtures and there's a couple of tricky ones (Leeds away, Boro and Reading at home) but the next 2 should be winnable and we'll see where we are after that.  I'd say that Southampton are in trouble but they only drew a game!

Reading just can't seem to stop winning, although it was only 1-0 last night.  Big game when they come to us.

I was going to go on Saturday but can't now.  Will definitely make the boro match though, and hopefully the reading game.


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## tommers (Mar 21, 2012)

Well, I went last night.  That was about 4 hours of my life I'll never get back.  Really miserable stuff, the only highlight was their goal.

We need to start winning some games soon, or it's the playoffs for us.


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## hammerntongues (Mar 21, 2012)

It was dire , fucking 1-1 draws are getting to be a habit , thankfully Reading lost , it looks more and more like we are now playing for the runners up spot .Faye was the only player who shone , the rest were awful , Noble and Tomkins  included . We just lack pace and imagination , if we are going to be playing Prem football next season we are in for lots more misery .


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## chintz (Mar 21, 2012)

I heard someone say your fans were singing We want Di Canio, is that right?


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## hammerntongues (Mar 21, 2012)

If they did I didn`t hear it , it wouldn`t surprise me though


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## tommers (Mar 21, 2012)

Yeah, I didn't hear that either.

"Lack pace and imagination" - couldn't have put it better myself.  So bloody slow.  Thing is, Nolan and Noble don't work as a pairing but if you play one up front then you've got situations like last night when Maynard was wasted out on the wing.  We need some pace and somebody who can go past people.  Vaz Te, Faubert or Morrison.  I know the first 2 are injured but it can't hurt to give Ravel a go.  We can't carry on just drawing games.


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## tommers (Mar 23, 2012)

We've bid for the Olympic Stadium again.

Spurs and Orient haven't.


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## hammerntongues (Mar 27, 2012)

Off to ` Boro tonight , first away game this season , atmosphere has been so flat at UP I thought I would travel , apparently 5000 tickets sold which is over a quarter of capacity AND its terraces , should be a hoot  , not bad effort for a Tuesday night .

Vaz te and Faye both fit again so looking for a decent result before the big one on Saturday ( I never thought the big one would involve Reading but thats about where we are right now ! )


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## tommers (Mar 31, 2012)

I don't know how we lost that.  Stupid fucking errors for their first two.  That's probably it.

Fuck. Should have won it easily.


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## hammerntongues (Apr 27, 2012)

Assuming that the obvious happens and we have to go to play-offs it`s 4.30 on bank holiday Monday , more TV bollocks and fuck the fans who attend the games ,bastards !! Should be under floodlights .


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## tommers (Apr 28, 2012)

Play offs it is.  Come on Boro!  I want you first!


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## el-ahrairah (May 15, 2012)

gosh, it's gone a bit quiet around here. 

i am glad we got blackpool.  i like them, so that if we lose i won't feel so aggrieved.


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## tommers (May 15, 2012)

el-ahrairah said:


> gosh, it's gone a bit quiet around here.
> 
> i am glad we got blackpool. i like them, so that if we lose i won't feel so aggrieved.


 

Don't say that!  I'm glad it's them cos Birmingham are a bogey team and we beat Blackpool 4-0 at home and 4-1 away with ten men and a midfielder in goal.

So 2-0 to them it is.

I couldn't get tickets.  Been a few times this season but have used a mate's season ticket and when we did buy our own my dad just used his reference and not mine.  So I could get a ticket for him but not me....   My last hope is a mate of a mate who used to work at the FA.


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## hammerntongues (May 15, 2012)

Its been 30 years since we were last at Wembley and I am away for the weekend with no chance of cancelling , I will be watching from a bar in Spain as a very gratefull friend clutches my ticket , bollocks.

Pretty confident about this one which is an odd feeling for a Hammer , I almost think I would have preferred Brum , at least with them you know what you are going to get and we are playing well enough to beat them no worries , Blackpool however are unpredictable and will almost certainly come at us , it will be an open game but really feel confident we have a full squad and one which is scoring goals , bring it on ................


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## RaverDrew (Jun 7, 2012)

So this Sam Baldock fella is joining us on a season long loan. Is he any good ?  Scoring record doesn't exactly excite me.


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## tommers (Jun 7, 2012)

Ah, is he?  There were rumours that was going to be some kind of makeweight in a deal for Zaha.

I think he's good.  Scored a few for MK Dons and scored a couple for us at the beginning but...
a) he got injured and
b) he couldn't get back into the team afterwards due to Sam's obsession with playing one big fella up front and so he was on the wing or something and wasn't great.

Stick him up front in the classic "big man little man" partnership and he'll get you some goals.


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## el-ahrairah (Jun 7, 2012)

BFS barely gave him a chance to get into his stride.  looks like a good one for the future.


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## tommers (Jun 7, 2012)

Is this just a rumour drew?  I've looked at KUMB and there's nothing definite on there....


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## RaverDrew (Jun 7, 2012)

The Baldock loan might not be announced for a while, but is a done deal, that's from a very reliable insider at Palace.

The Zaha rumour originated from someone on one of your forums suggesting the idea of throwing Baldock in as a makeweight. Of course this was then repeated on football rumours as fact, then picked up on by lazy journalists from talksport and the Daily Mail "our inside sources say...etc" basically a load of old shit.

I've heard straight from our chairman's mouth that Zaha will be going nowhere this summer unless we're offered silly money, with him hinting that it would take at least £12m+ "similar price to the Oxlade-Chamberlain deal" were his exact words. Even then he said there is no need to sell and it would be completely up to the manager. Tbh I'd be very shocked if he ended up at your place.

Just checked out a youtube vid of Baldock, looks alright, quick and seems to score a lot of screamers, gives us something we missed up front last season.


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## tommers (Jun 7, 2012)

Yeah, I don't think we're signing Zaha - it was just a rumour.


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